#famous people don't deserve this any more than normal people do

[book-addicted-thing]

ok is it just me or is cockles a really weird ship? like, not sure if you noticed, but I'm pretty sure Misha and Jensen are uncomfortable with being shipped. their characters are one thing, but themselves? if I was being shipped with one of my best friends I'd be really awkward. not to mention, they're both married?? it's like people still shipping Frerard. it's just weird. be respectful of other people, famous or not.

[subbmissivesuccubus]

Bully- Part 1

Summary: Your bully's, Gojo and Geto, find out an embarrassing secret of yours and will never let you live it down. But maybe, you don't want them to.

Disclaimer: 18+ fic. Gojo X Fem reader X Geto. Humiliation kink. Free use kink. Gojo and Geto being mean. Bully Geto and Gojo. Dub-con warning. It is subtly implied that reader wants and enjoys what's happening to her, but the boys don't care to ask for consent.

a/n: Sorry it took so long wah but here's part one to the series. I plan to write many more cause damn it is so fun haha. I promise, the next part will have all the gratuitous smut and ruthless fucking this premise deserves. Consider this an appetizer <3

Taglist: @bisexuawolfsalt @candycandy00 @nekonanamii @sirimiripetrichor @collectionofdolls @dreamsxmerci

You sighed as you walked towards your classroom, dragging your feet, knowing full well what was waiting for you. It was the end of the day and it was your turn to clean up the classroom and just your luck- you were paired up with the two people you couldn't stand.

Gojo and Geto. The two 'strongest' sorcerers of your school. Their reputation preceded them. One of them was the prodigal son of a famous family with a deadly technique while the other had an incredibly useful and powerful skill as well. Everyone disliked them to some extent, but nobody could deny that the Jujutsu world would be worse without them.

Which is why it always confused you as to why these two powerful men seemed to love bullying you.

They were never malicious but damn if they weren't annoying. They loved to tease and prank you, joking about how weak you were and how you couldn't do anything by yourself. Forget the fact that you were actually quite strong and capable- but compared to them- everyone was weak.

But they seemed to enjoy bullying you especially even if there were classmates who were of lower grade than you. Stealing your drink right before you were going to take it from the vending machine, taking unflattering pictures of you and distributing it, embarrassing you in front of strangers by treating you like a dumb baby in front of them, making loud sex noises if you were on the phone with someone, tossing away your books and stealing your money-

Gojo spanking your ass casually a few times, Geto licking off some chocolate that was smeared next to your lips like it was a normal thing to do and even that one time when they cornered you in the hallway and convinced you to let them grope your boobs:

"If you let us squeeze your tits, we'll leave you alone for a week~" Gojo had said, wangling his fingers comically as they both stared at your chest like perverts. The offer was too good to give up which led to them squeezing your clothed tits for ten second each before they left, laughing at how easy it was to use you. And of course, they continued to bother you anyway.

You could have made a complaint to the higher ups about their behavior, something your friends have told you to do but you refused. You didn't want to be the wuss who was running to the elders over something so childish when everyone has an important job to do. Dealing with some bullying was easy compared to fighting to the death with some curses.

Besides, if you reported on them...

You steeled yourself before opening to the door to the classroom, met with the sight you expected: Gojo and Geto, lounging around, not doing any work as they waited for you to do it for them because, in their words: 'the weaklings need to put in more effort'.

But what you were not expecting to see was your phone in Gojo's hand using earplugs that he had connected to the device. You knew you left your phone in the locker assigned to you in the hallways which meant these two managed to pick the lock and take it. But the anger over that was dwarfed by your sudden realization:

The way they were looking at you as you closed the door, giving you a shocked look but you could tell there was an underlying hint of pure glee.

Uh oh.

"Give me back my-"

You yelped as Geto suddenly grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards him, barely giving you a second to collect yourself before he wrapped his arms around your neck, catching you in a choke-hold. Before you could even react, he pulled your back against him and manhandled you as he sat on a classroom bench and forced you to sit between his legs, wrapping said legs around you. You were completely caught, your nails doing nothing even as you dug it into his arms.

"Holy fuck!" Gojo explained, eyes wide and a huge grin on his face as he continued to listen to the audio on your phone, looking over at you and Geto opposite of the table he was sitting on, "You're a perverted freak, aren't you?"

"Give it back!" you snapped, grunting in annoyance as you tried to break out of Geto's hold but the man simply laughed as he held you tighter, his legs not budging.

"This is some nasty stuff!" Gojo continued, "Who knew a weakling like you would be such a masochistic slut~" he removed the earbuds from the socket and increased the volume as he confirmed what you had feared:

"Yeah? you like that don't you? Little slut~" a man's voice echoed throughout the room from your phone speakers, "Everybody looking at you as I fuck this sloppy little pussy~ Oh this cunt is dripping for me- did you like being spanked in front of them so much?"

It was an erotic audio you had saved on your phone, one of many that you enjoyed in private. You had even saved it under non-suspicious names which meant that the boys were digging through your files to find something- and they did.

"This isn't even the only one we heard, you know." Gojo explained as he dangled the phone in front of you mockingly, "What was it again? A girl getting humiliated by her teacher in front of her classmates-"

"A girl getting groped by her boyfriend on a crowded train." Geto recollected, his lips so close to your ear you could feel his hot breath dance against your skin.

"Being used as a free-use toy by a group of guys~" Gojo said, a giant shit eating grin on his face, "Seems like this one has a humiliation kink~"

"I'm not surprised." Geto said, leaning into your ear and blowing into it, making you gasp and jump, "No wonder she never reported us to the principle for all the times we preyed on her. She was probably enjoying it."

"Oh!" Gojo said like he just realized it, "Was that why? Was your pussy growing wet every time we bullied you, little slut?"

"Fuck you." you spat out, both of the men laughing in response.

"Yeah, I bet you wanted us to fuck you." Geto growled into your ear, your shiver not going unnoticed by him, "You're fucking loving this~"

"Why don't we check?" Gojo suggested, cutting off anything you might have said, his hands inching towards your belt, a dangerous gleam in his eyes, "Let's see for ourselves if we made your pussy wet~"

"Gojo-"

"That's a great plan!" Geto interrupted, laughing as he tightened his hold your your neck, making you gasp, "Take those pants off. So baggy and loose- what a waste of a nice ass."

"I agree." Gojo said, finger now running over the metal of your belt, "it hides so much. With what I felt everytime I've spanked you- your pants do you no favors."

"Don't you- fucking dare!" You choked out, face turning slightly red from the lack of air and from Gojo slowly starting to fiddle with your belt.

"Oh, what are you gonna do about it, little slut?" Gojo teased, licking his lips as his long, lithe fingers started to tug at the leather of your belt, "Look at your fucking face- that look in your eyes? You're loving this."

"No- I'm not- fuck-" you sputtered out, failing to convey your frustrations. You couldn't stand these two assholes. Constantly picking on you and thinking they were so high and mighty- treating you like a bug on their path. So smug and narcissistic and not caring about anyone but themselves-

But as much as you'd hate to admit it, you couldn't deny that your body was throbbing. Everytime they bullied you, you felt that heat. Your heart-rate quickened and your pussy would grow wet, leaving you a confused mess every-time you got bullied. When it first happened, you didn't understand what was happening. Through some internet searching, you found those audios and realized you weren't the only one out there.

A masochist with a humiliation kink.

And without them knowing, the two guys you hate were fulfilling those fantasies for you.

Well now, they were more than aware.

"Come on, little bitch~" Geto cooed into your ear, his silky voice making you shudder, "Why settle with these audios when you can experience the real thing?"

"I...I..." you panted, heat rushing to your face and your heart pounding in your chest. You could feel your pussy dampen and had no doubt that if Gojo actually took your pants off, they'd see you be wet and needy.

"Too slow~" Gojo suddenly said, unbuckling your belt in a matter of seconds before ripping it off of you just as fast, throwing it aside. You yelped as you instinctively struggled, Geto laughing behind you as he tightened his hold on you even more, rendering you helpless. Gojo laughed as well, his bright blue eyes peeking from behind his glasses as you could see the gleam of excitement in them.

"You excited, little bitch?" Gojo cooed, licking his lips as his hands started trailing up your leg, running over the fabric of your pants as he inched up higher and higher. Everywhere he touched felt like it was on fire, a rush of heat coursing through you.

"He asked you a question." Geto said, clicking his tongue as you refused to say anything, "Weren't you taught any manners?"

"Fucking- i'll kill you-" you gasped out, face growing redder as you heard Geto's growl of annoyance, feeling the vibration of his chest against your back. "Don't worry about it, Suguru." Gojo said, smirking as he started undoing the buttons of your pants, "We can punish her later for her disrespect. For now, I just want to get at this pussy~"

With a big grin, Gojo ripped your pants off of you in one fell swoop, making you squeal as he tossed it away. You shivered as your bare legs were exposed to the evening air as well as their lecherous stares. You could see Gojo's eyes trail up your legs before zoning in on your clothed pussy, the man letting out a snort as he took in your panties.

"Pink with a bow on? Really?" he joked, "how plain and not sexy."

"I think they're cute." Geto chimed in, also shamelessly staring down at your clothed cunt, "But it doesn't matter. It's not going to be on her for long, anyway."

"True." Gojo said with a nod as he hooked his finger into the waistband of your panties and pulled it out before letting go, allowing the elastic to slap back against you, "but next time, wear something sexier."

"I hate you- so much!" you snarled, face bright red, biting your lower lip as the white haired man looped his fingers back into the waistband of your panties, this time, very obviously wanting to get it off of you. You gasped, unable to stop your shivers as Gojo leaned forward and placed a kiss on your tummy, his tongue peeking out to lick at your skin as he slowly starting pulling your panties down. He laughed as you tried to squiggle out but your movements only made the slide of your panties all the more easier for him.

"Look at that~" Gojo gasped as your cunt got exposed, practically drooling as he stared like a pervert, a twinkle behind his blue eyes, "You might be a weakling but atleast you have a pretty pussy."

"Atleast she's good for something~" Geto teased, shuffling behind you and in that moment, you felt it. Something long, hard and thick pressed up against your back and it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what that was. You gulped as you felt the imprint of Geto's cock against you, unable to help yourself as your eyes darted towards the front of Gojo's pants and sure enough: His erection was straining against it.

They were too focused on your cunt to notice where you were looking and you were too focused on their dicks to notice that your panties were now completely off and that Gojo had tossed the fabric aside. Geto immediately hooked his legs over your own before forcefully spreading them apart, leaving you wide and exposed to their perverted gazes. Gojo let out a whistle as he dragged a chair over before sitting on it, his face now right across your bare cunt.

"Fuck- fuck you- fuck you!" you gasped out and cursed, feeling lightheaded from the situation. "How does she look?" Geto asked, both of them ignoring you and you could hear the hunger in his voice and the sensation of his cock twitching against you. "Oh, she's perfect~" Gojo responded and you knew they were referring to your pussy as its own person- somehow giving it more praise and respect than they've ever given you, "And oh so wet~"

"I want to see." Geto demanded, not having the same view as Gojo, "Can't let you have all the fun."

"Sure thing, pal." Gojo said, not taking his eyes off of your pussy as he continued to stare, hand reaching into his pocket to pull out his phone. "Gojo- don't you dare-" You barked out, understanding what he was going to do- but what you hoped sounded aggressive came out soft and subservient. The man simply snorted in response, ignoring your pleas as he opened up his phone camera and started taking pictures of your pussy. You shut your eyes and squealed everytime you heard the shutter of the camera, trembling body still held tightly in Geto's arms.

"Her hole clenches every-time I take a picture~" Gojo cooed, bringing a hand up to thumb at your pussy lips before spreading them apart even more, making your back arch against Geto, "And look at this little clit! So fucking cute!"

"Just show it to me already!" Geto snarled, impatient. "Alright, alright." Gojo responded with a roll of his eyes, standing up before turning the phone towards the two of you, a shot of your spread pussy on screen. You turned your head away and closed your eyes, ears ringing at how humiliated you felt-

and pussy dripping at how good it was.

"Oh, she does look delicious!" Geto praised, gripping your chin as he forced you to turn your head back towards the phone, making you look at the picture, "You have such a pretty cunt and you hid it from us for so long?"

You whined cutely as you looked at the picture- a closeup shot of your spread cunt with a clear view of your clit and hole, your cunt glistening with slick.

"Seriously!" Gojo barked as he started swiping, showing off the various photos of your pussy that were now in his possession, "If we knew all you wanted was some fucking, we'd have pounded this pussy ages ago! I've always wanted a sex toy."

"Don't you have like a dozen already?"

"Yeah, but I'm sure this bitch's cunt will feel way better than some silicone~"

"I hate you-" you gasped out, any and all fight leaving your bones (not that there was much to begin with) as you leaned your head against Geto's shoulder, "I hate you both- so much-"

"Yeah?" Geto asked, the tone in his voice clearly indicating that he wasn't taking you seriously, "Well, this pussy says otherwise."

He let go of your chin and snaked his hand down quickly to cup your pussy, making you yelp. You didn't know if what you felt was shame or relief that there was finally a hand on your cunt- finally some friction against your dripping womanhood. You tossed your head back, eyebrows furrowed and lip trapped under your teeth as Geto's long fingers started gliding through your pussy lips. The slick sound of him rubbing circles over your hole and collecting your wetness echoed through the room, the sound making your ears burn and your chest feel like it was on fire.

This is was so...so...

so fucking fun...

"She's loving this~" Gojo predicted accurately, eyes darting between your blissful expression and Geto's fingers toying with your body, "Fucking whore- slutty bitch- oh, we are going to have fun with you~"

"Her pussy is growing wetter by the second." Geto noted, cock fully erect and throbbing against you, his other arm slowly letting go of the hold around your neck, confident that you were going to stay right there like a good little girl. You gasped as the head spinning pressure was finally off of you, taking in a few deep breaths but choking on it just as quickly as the man started using his slick covered fingers to run circles over your clit.

"You're dripping all over the table, little bitch~" Gojo teased, taking a couple more pictures before pocketing it, "Fuck- let me feel too- or- actually-"

He sat back on the chair, pulling it closer before gripping your thighs, an eager grin on his face:

"I'm gonna eat~"

"Get used to this, little bitch." Geto growled into your ear, pulling his hand away from your cunt and snickering at your whine of disappointment, "You're our toy now and we are going to do whatever we want to you, understand?"

His hands came upto your chest, lithe fingers starting to undo the buttons of your shirt one by one, revealing a patch of skin before the peeks of your bra. Gojo licked his lips and moved forward, his hot breath fanning against your slick cunt.

"Whatever. We. Want."

[ghsface]

Not sure if you are taking request but can we get an angst with Matt where like reader and him are dating for years but recently comments have been getting to her or people have been following her home and eventually she decideds to break up with Matt but Matt takes things to in his hands where he’s tells ppl to stop and they get back together?(Lol sorry if it didn’t make sense but thank you)

𝜗𝜚 new messege .ᐟ.ᐟ

Hey gorgeous, I really liked this idea, I hope you like it too.

You are the only thing I want - Matt Sturniolo

Sumary: You and Matt had a secret relationship and when you decide to make it public everything goes wrong...

Warnings: angst hate messages towards reader, this is just angst with a happy ending

A/n: Leave me ideas to write in my inbox because I'm running out of ideas. I'm sorry if something is misspelled or not understood. My first language is not English. By the way, what do you think of my new theme, in my opinion, it's very cute like the baby pink and light brown. 🩷🧸

⛧°。 ⋆༺ ✮ ༻⋆。 °⛧

It had been exactly fourteen months since the first time you and Matt kissed. You hadn't imagined then how important he would become in your life, nor that being with him would be so complicated. Because, although you adored each other and the bond between you grew every day, that relationship had to be kept secret. It was a mutual decision, made for practical reasons. At first, the thrill of secrecy made everything more exciting. But now, you both felt exhausted.

You had spent too many nights talking secretly in the car, dates arranged down to the last detail so as not to be seen, or moments of solitude where, instead of shouting to the world how much you loved each other, you had to hide it like a forbidden secret. The situation was starting to weigh on you.

That night, you were on the couch at Matt's house. He was holding you, and your head was resting on his shoulder while you felt his fingers playing with the strands of your hair.

"Aren't you tired of this?" he asked quietly, breaking the silence.

You raised your head and looked at him, searching his eyes for what he really wanted to say.

"What are you talking about?"

"About having to hide… about not being able to tell anyone how amazing you are." Matt smiled, but his eyes reflected a sadness that you shared.

"Of course I'm tired. Sometimes I wish we could be a normal couple".

"Then let's do it", he suggested, giving your hand a squeeze. "Let's make it public. I don't care what others say. I want to be with you, and I want everyone to know it."

The idea made you feel butterflies in your stomach. The love you had for Matt was bigger than any fear, and the fact that he was willing to share your relationship with his fans made you feel special. You decided to announce it on social media.

When Matt uploaded the first photo of the two of you together, you felt a mix of excitement and nervousness. The image showed an intimate moment, a selfie of the two smiling on the beach, with the sunset in the background. The caption was simple but powerful: “Over a year together, and we’re just getting started.”

For the first few hours, the response was overwhelmingly positive. There were comments from fans congratulating and supporting them: “They look beautiful together,” “Finally someone makes Matt happy as he deserves,” “What a great couple they make!”

But over time, other types of messages began to appear. “Her? Is he really with her?”, “She’s not enough for him,” “She’s only with him for fame, I’m sure she’ll use him to become famous,” “Poor Matt, he deserves someone better.”

At first, you tried not to take them seriously. But every time you checked your phone, more of those comments appeared. There were people criticizing your appearance: “She’s too basic for someone like him,” “She’s not even pretty, how dare she date Matt?”, “Matt deserves someone more attractive.”

The words cut you deeply. You knew you shouldn’t let those comments affect you, but you couldn’t stop the doubts from starting to poison your mind. Every time you looked in the mirror, you started to see those flaws that others mentioned. Insecurity began to invade you in a way you hadn’t experienced before.

Matt tried to comfort you whenever he noticed you looking down. Sometimes, during the night, he would catch you reading the comments on your phone, and he would simply take the phone away from you and hold you, whispering that he loved you and that was all that mattered.

“You don’t need to listen to those people, babe,” he said, looking at you with a sincere expression. “They don’t know anything about you, they don’t know how amazing you are.”

The comments didn’t stop, though. Every day they became crueler and crueler. Rumors began to circulate suggesting that you were only with Matt to gain followers, or that you were using his fame to make yourself known. People commented on every aspect of your life, from how you dressed to how you looked without makeup. There were those who said things like, “It’s obvious that she dresses like that to get attention, can’t she dress up better?” or “She should thank Matt for giving her a chance, she’s just an ordinary girl.”

At some point, comments were no longer the only thing. People started following you home, taking photos of you without your permission, and even trying to get close to you to ask you invasive questions. You felt watched and judged at every turn, and little by little, you started to believe that you weren't enough, that maybe all those people were right.

The pressure began to be unbearable. Your self-esteem plummeted, and every time you looked in the mirror, you saw someone who, according to the world, wasn’t enough. Matt tried to cheer you up, to remind you how much he loved you, but you couldn’t stand it anymore.

One night, after one of your most difficult conversations, you asked him to meet you. Matt came over to your house, and as soon as you saw him, he knew something was wrong. He stared at you in silence as you searched for the words to say to him.

“Matt… I can’t do this anymore,” you whispered, your voice shaking.

“What are you saying?” he asked, frowning, clearly worried.

“I can’t be in this relationship anymore. The pressure, the comments… they’re tearing me apart. I can’t take it anymore.

Matt looked at you, unable to process what you were saying. He was trying to understand, but the pain in your eyes made it clear to him that you were really hurt.

“But… I love you, and I don’t care what other people think. They don’t understand what we have.”

“I know, Matt. I know you love me, but I can’t go on like this. I’m losing myself in all of this.” It's getting harder and harder to get up and pretend everything is okay.

You took a deep breath, trying to hold back your tears. “Matt… I can’t keep going like this. I can’t handle the pressure, the comments, the people following me everywhere. I feel like I’m losing myself, and I don’t want to drag you into this. I think… I think it’s best that we break up.”

The goodbye was hard and heartbreaking for both of us. In the days that followed, Matt stayed away from social media, not mentioning anything about what had happened. He isolated himself, trying to understand how the love of his life had to walk away because of the cruelty of others.

Weeks went by as you tried to get over the situation, even though you felt empty. However, one afternoon, while you were checking your social media, you noticed a post from Matt that surprised you.

It was a photo of you and him that Nick had taken, and the message was clear and direct: “I don't give a shit what others say about my girlfriend. I'm with her because I love her, and that's never going to change.”

Matt's public statement was not only a message to his fans, but a promise that he was willing to stand up for what they had. Feeling a torrent of emotions, you decided to call him. When he answered, his voice trembled with emotion.

"I can't go on without you" he said quietly, while you tried to hold back your tears.

"Me neither, Matt… I love you."

That night, they met again, and between tears and hugs, they knew that this time there would be nothing and no one that could separate.

⛧°。 ⋆༺ ✮ ༻⋆。 °⛧

your reblogs and replies are always appreciated dearly, and feel free to leave a request ✮

⤷ Tags... @matthewsroses @sophand4n4 @strnilolover @lolastrniolo

[etherfabric]

Directions from Your Higher Self

Choose a pile by which picture you resonate with the most.

If your mind is too busy to clearly decide, take a few deep breaths, and use the finger of your non-dominant hand to hover over the images. One will give off the most subtle yet prominent signals, like tingles, a magnetic pull, or temperature. This is your pile. Multiples are also possible.

Pile 1

The Star, The Moon

You started to believe in miracles, and are now scared shitless. No small expectations keeping you safe from disappointment anymore. You got a taste of what magic feels like, and now fear dullness like the plague. Two things: You are allowed to have boring days, that doesn't mean the magic is gone. It can't be Christmas everyday. You would get sick of the lights eventually, believe me. And the other thing: That's why they say that victimhood can be a kind of safety blanket. If you already expect only crap from life, there is no horrible suspense anymore. But now... you can't go back. Even if you try it.

This is an icky phase of metamorphosis. It's normal that it feels disorienting and like you can't make sense of anything anymore. Do soothing stuff, calming habits, be around safe people. And spoiler: This is about embracing your humanity in a whole new depth. Don't worry, it will feel supernatural again soon enough. But for now, practice being plain, while also weaving your belief in miracles into it. Challenging, yes, but nothing you can't handle. You got this.

Pile 2

The Moon, 3 of Pentacles

Nothing you put energy or effort into seems to yield anything. It feels like punching in slowmotion, nightmarish. Hitting no one who needs to feel your hits. Newsflash: This is not a time for work! Get soft, dammit. You can't experience rest while still trying to prove something. No one is watching. You are being your own cruel audience, and boo yourself into despair. What are you aiming at? Who convinced you that particular thing is the sole hope for you to be happy ever again?

I love you, you are me, I am you, but I can't let you go on like this. Not with what lies ahead of us. If you only knew how easy things will get. How many fears will never come true. How much lighter you could afford to be. How much love you already deserve. But you have to dare opening your arms, and put the tools down. The monuments you try to erect are aimed at Gods you won't believe in anymore once you experience your feminine side as a gift, and not a curse. Grindset? Grind your teeth while napping, if you have to. But this is bigger than your egotistical, temporal ambitions. You need to do it slow, and I won't stop insisting. Because I can see more than you. You will have no choice but trusting me on this one.

Pile 3

The Emperor, The Devil

Have you heard of this awesome thing called "free will"? Let's take that baby for a ride. Use 3 spoons for the same meal. Lie on the floor of your hallway and recite a song. Buy a stranger a magazine about trains. Take a pair of scissors to your least favorite shirt. Name your nail polishes after famous people. The possibilities are literally endless, but yet you rotate the same 7 things. They will stay ready for when you need them next, but let's shake it up a little, huh? No wonder you feel trapped and stuck. But YOU make the rules, at the end of the day. Yes, there are outer limitations you have no influence over, but even in a literal cage, you can decide what you think, or how you sit, or what notes you hum, or what shadow figures you make with your hands.

The thing itself is meaningless - it's about you experiencing being a CREATOR. Not just a servant to others. I don't care if it's throwing a paper plane into your bathtub, or quitting your job and disappearing to Nepal - but we crave novelty and agency. Deeply. Break the self-imposed limits, any of them. Just to feel what it feels like. It's more rewarding than you imagine.

Pile 4

The Hanged Man, 2 of Cups

Oh shucks. You like someone. It happened. And you can't cancel it willynilly. Suppression has run its course, and now you have to face the embarrassment of having a heart with a need to connect and love. This has completely ruined your illusion of sovereignty you so deeply depended on to feel safe in the world. What now? Where will it lead? What does it mean? What will happen next? Do they like me? Do they think of me? Do they think of me badly? Why do I think about them? Is this me being brave, or pathetic? Is there a true difference?...

The questions don't stop, and you know what - they shouldn't. This is less about the "result" of this connection (I know, boo me, because this is your hyperfixation above all, despite not ever admitting it) and more about getting you out of your shell to be curious about yourself again. The heart needs to be open, and these fears and doubts have been there for a long time already. You are ready to face them, examine them, and learn more about yourself than any flavour of aloofness could ever teach you. I know you hate it, but I can also see the faint giggly twinkle in your soul from up here, buried under all this denial and acting tough. And that's the most scary part for you. That you actually like someone, like, in THAT way. How scary that life has no guarantees, but coming to peace with that truth will serve you much more than any relationship ever could.

[dapper-lil-arts]

I'm invested now, why don't you like fluttercord?

Okay, here we go then, why don't I like one of the most famous and prolific ships on the fandom?

First of all, there's a major power imbalance at play, you know, chaos god that can reshape mind and reality with a snap of his fingers matched with a regular pegasus girl, and an drastic age difference (which could be discarded cause Fluttershy's an adult, just worth a mention.)

But the primary issue comes from the canon itself, especially with how they came together. Fluttershy was just shafted for her full responsibility to be to make sure Discord gets better; Something that already was a strange choice of Celestia (like girl why are you throwing a random mortal you dont know that well onto a godlike chaos being even you struggled with? It reeks of writers already having come up a solution and not wanting to build a foundation to lead there.) and canon proves again and again that if discord doesnt have fluttershy around, he will make bad choices and hurt people, something that gets proven again and again all the way to gen fucking five. That's textbook codependency and it makes it even more weird by the incredible, terrifying power imbalance. Discord isnt just an alicorn, hes the only one of his kind because of how powerful he is, and his powers are insanely dangerous to have on a relationship with a mortal. Like, you saw how he was when he was jealous of Fluttershy for having a diffrent friend. Can you imagine what he'd do if somebody flirted with her? (even if they weren't dating, if Fluttershy said she got a girlfriend or whatever, Discord would straight up throw rainbow dash on a labyrinth of infinite agony)

I think my primary issues come from the canon because he is always abusing his powers, never using them wisely, and always causing trouble (WHICH WAS THE ORIGINAL POINT OF EVEN BRINGING HIM BACK TOO)-- And the ratio of slaps on the wrist lower dramatically by the end (the final conflict is entirely his fault purely because he thought having a conflict would be cool)-- All of which just makes him untrustworthy to be on a relationship with a mortal hes obssesed with. He'd be like a yandere boyfriend exept a chaos god, which, yikes!

Srsly the fact that cozy glow the toddler gets sent to hell and turned to stone instead of the chaos god that sponsored her is just plain WEIRD. It's a writers problem.

There's a reasons why Alicorns have to ascend, earn their power-- And why they tend to abuse it less. Being born with power just begets a diffrent attitude towards it; Which is smth that the writers do interpret quite well, with how Discord acts. he has no empathy, he doesnt need to care, because reality is his to shape, and then boom, teaching someone to be better just became a lot harder. Good character! Very funny, very well designed and voiced-- But goddamn he's weirdly written as a ""Good"" guy.

Now lets finally turn to the woman in the relationship. because Fluttershy is a normal mortal gal with a normal mortal life with her own needs, which generally shouldn't have to involve her entire life or routine on making sure a godlike manbaby does the right thing with his powers. it doesn't feel like the kind of thing that has any consent to it, after all, discord doesnt need to ask for anything, he can just do. (THANKS FOR THE IDEA CELESTIA) It just reeks of a kind of misoginy-ass writing where the woman has to bend over backwards for the man.

Its like the shy pegasus was just. Set up for LIFE on this strange relationship. Its kind of creepy.

And Fluttershy just deserves better than him in my opinion; And she can do better, too. Also it doesnt help that you know-- 99% other ship with fluttershy dont have any of these issues lmao. Even canon Rainbow Dash would treat her better, so i dont bother with Fluttercord ever!

[yukimomodivorce]

The Ghosts in IDOLiSH7 are a Literary Device, Mostly

(an essay by me)

People are always asking me, "Robin, what the fuck is up with those ghosts in IDOLiSH7? How come this otherwise completely non-supernatural universe randomly has these two ghosts that show up and then never get acknowledged again? Is it just canon that ghosts exist and only Riku and Momo can see them?" and I am always telling them that I have an analysis about this I just haven't written it yet. But that ends today, as do all of these very pressing concerns about the i7 Ghosts™, because here I am, finally writing the analysis. This essay will have two sections, the first on the training camp ghost from part 3/third beat, and the second on the Re:vale house ghost from Yuki's third chapter of Re:member. So, spoilers for all of part 3/third beat in both sections, Re:member in section 2, and there's one extremely minor spoiler for part 4 in section 1 but it's honestly so predictable I don't think it even counts. Also, I'll reiterate this once we get to it, but just a warning that section 2 will contain discussions of depression, suicide and suicidal ideation, and a brief mention of self-harm, so please stop reading after section 1 if you don't want to see any of that! Another less important disclaimer about section 2 is that I am going to spend an entirely unecessary amount of time talking about Yuki. I am normal about Yuki. Okay. Without further ado, let's watch my spiral into ghost analogy insanity unfold!

Game translations: @seigyokus Re:member translations: @ takara_time (+ scans and editing by @ waitamomoment) Rabbit chat translations: @osakaso5

Section 1: The Training Camp Ghost

This first point applies to both ghosts, but I wanna start by noting that I think superstitions and beliefs like this are more common in Japan than a lot of other places, so yeah it is entirely possible that ghosts are just a canon and accepted thing in Idolish7's universe and this isn't really that strange of a detail for the series to include. However, I don't have any real background knowledge about if ghosts are normal in non-supernatural anime/etc. and I am not committing to that kind of research, so we'll have to leave the specifics of the ghost canonicity issue to someone else. But regardless of how canon they are, I think we've established well enough by now that the i7 writers don't put much of anything in the series without reason (re:vale band name you will always be famous. to me), and that definitely applies here as well - both of our ghosts are doing a LOT of potential symbolic work in their brief appearances, and that's what we'll be unpacking today, starting with the TCG.

The infamous TCG (training camp ghost) of Atami needs no introduction, but I'll give her one anyway. During the filming of the Friends Day special, upon following the shopping group home, she offers her services to Riku (inexplicably the only person capable of communicating with her) for the evening entertainment group's test of courage, terrorises several cast members throughout the day, and finally brings us Soma Saito's incredible cover of Dis One before probably being sent back to idol fan purgatory forever. Who is she? Where did she come from? I have several theories.

1.1: The TCG is the audience

While the 'ghosts are real in i7' possibility is there, I think it's also important to note in this case that the whole training camp is very explicitly being filmed for TV, and the biggest vibe I get from this episode of the anime is that the ghost is a part of the show, and we're seeing that show through the eyes of its in-universe audience. This happens pretty often in i7 (for example, when we see the groups talk to their fans during concerts), and generally the line between the real fans and the fictional ones can get pretty blurred (which deserves its own much longer analysis but I Am Not Writing All That), so everything with the in-universe audience here kind of naturally extends to us as the real audience. The TCG would probably be easy enough to manufacture with special effects as long as Riku and the driver guy were in on it, and it would make sense for the Friends Day producers to include it to keep things entertaining and be a stand-in for their viewers/fans of the idol groups - the ghost is specifically a female fan of male idols (Zero), and a lot of her interactions with the cast would qualify as self-insert material (e.g. Tenn singing for her and Riku looking directly into the camera to smile at her). And speaking of Tenn and Riku,

1.2 The TCG is Nanase twins angst

I think this connection is fairly obvious in their exchange here. You could make a case for the ghost representing either one of the twins. Like Riku, she's being pushed away by Tenn before she's ready to leave, told that it's necessary and for the best that they stay separated - after all, they live in different worlds. Like Tenn, she's leaving despite Riku's protests and part of her not really wanting to go at first, because she believes it's for the best that they stay separated - after all, they live in different worlds.

There's also the association with ghosts of being ignored/invisible, and Riku being the only person able to see or talk to her. Maybe it's because he's the only one who's able to reach her. Maybe he can see her because he understands her on some level - she was torn away from life like he was torn away from his brother, and she's now practically invisible to everyone else around her, like Riku probably feels to Tenn (and arguably the rest of his family in some ways). Maybe he wants her to feel seen, and he can make Tenn acknowledge her in the way he wants to be acknowledged by him. I might actually be going somewhere with this so bear with me for a second.

1.3: The TCG is monster Riku foreshadowing

So my first thought when I watched the Nanase twin angst portion of this episode was 'well obviously the ghost isn't real and Riku is just using it to talk to Tenn indirectly' because they are always having indirect conversations like this and it makes me insane, and I do still think that's the idea here, just not quite in the sense that Riku is making things up. Going back to the whole 'ghost is a stand-in for the audience' thing, and assuming that she's saying the things that Riku wants to say and Tenn is telling her the things he wants to tell Riku, then we could say that rather than Riku purposefully having the ghost speak for him, this is an extension of the monster effect. I guess in this scenario the TCG is a real ghost (and a figurative representation of the audience), and Riku is having the same effect on her that Iori says he has on everyone else. He unknowingly projects his desire to connect with his brother onto her, and she tries to help him. Really, the only times we see her after she follows the shopping group to their cabin are when she's helping Riku, with the test of courage and then with speaking to Tenn. This gets convoluted so I kinda doubt it's intentional? But it's fun to think about.

1.4: The TCG is the friends we made along the way

Riku spells this out a bit more explicitly in the game here, but the TCG represents the each of the groups in the series in a couple different ways. I guess one way you could interpret this is that the ghost is meant to be there to emphasise how extraordinary it is that they're all together, but I don't think that really holds up considering how often they end up working with each other throughout the series anyway. What's important here is the idea of the ghost itself, something that can be present and felt even when it isn't physically or actually there. Again, the ghost is the audience - a constant influence for better and for worse on these idols even when they aren't watching, even in their personal lives; and vice versa, the ghost is the idols being able to reach their fans without ever actually knowing them. More relevant to what Riku says, the ghost is the groups to each other - friends, mentors, rivals, pushing them forward even when they aren't standing side by side. You could even say the ghost is ZOOL, friends who aren't here right now but will be someday. Re:vale and Idolish7 as groups don't especially fit the ghost description, but they have their fair share of ghosts - Banri, Haruki, Tenn, Aya, Sougo's uncle. Zero. The list goes on, for Trigger and ZOOL as well, but I think the most important way the ghost analogy applies to this section of the story is with Trigger. Because during the imminent Arc Where Trigger Gets Cancelled™, despite leaving their agency and disappearing almost entirely from the public eye, they're still very much there to their fans and to their friends. So. I kinda forgot what I was saying but to sum it all up the ghost here represents everything that stays with you even when it's far away or after it's gone from your life. Mikanseinabokura and all that. And now that I mention it-

Section 2: The Re:vale House Ghost

Once again, a warning that this section has a brief mention of self-harm, as well as in-depth discussions of depression, suicide and suicidal ideation (which I'm gonna be talking about pretty bluntly the entire time), so please don't proceed unless you're comfortable with all of that!

Like most things in Re:member, the RHG (Re:vale house ghost) makes me insane. Today I am going to attempt to form coherent thoughts about it and it is unlikely that I'll succeed, but try to bear with me. Though it isn't around for as long as the TCG, we have a little more info about the RHG - it's the ghost that haunts the shitty apartment Yuki and Momo live in together in their early days as Re:vale. Supposedly. All it actually does is slam the door of one kitchen cabinet and I don't think that this is definitive evidence of paranormal activity because most houses are just like that. It's all a little bit vague, but according to Re:vale, their house is definitely haunted by the ghost of someone who died in the kitchen, because when they move in there is a mysterious black stain on their kitchen floor. Momo introduces himself to the floor stain while Yuki stares at him in awe and blushes and shoujo filter flowers appear in his eyes. God I hate them. I think the RHG is just a figment of their collective imagination or maybe they're having one of those shared delusions or something. But that's really besides the point because this ghost exists for one very specific thematic purpose: the RHG is Yuki.

And on that note, let's go back and talk about Yuki for a few minutes (potentially hours) before we get to our actual analysis of the ghost scene. Mostly because I just wanna talk about him, but also because I do understand why some people think the 'Momo starts talking to ghosts' part of Re:member is kinda weird and random, and I think at least some of this is important to go over before we unpack it.

A consensus has already been established among Yuki scholars that our subject has autism (Kei et al. 2024). Today, I would like to propose an additional diagnosis: Yuki has depression.

2.1: "I lost my dreams, friends, and passion as well."

So, Yuki pretty clearly gets depressed when Ban leaves him. He loses interest in everything he used to care about, gives up on his dreams, blames himself for Ban's injury and disappearance, he's constantly sad, tired and irritable, and he lashes out at Momo (and Kujou, though there are some other pretty strong reasons for that one) and presumably everyone else he knows (I doubt he had a particularly good relationship with anyone else in the first place, but still).

He's grieving here, and it would make sense for him to react this way because of that fact alone. But I really don't think that's all there is to it, because he exhibits these symptoms (among others) long before Ban leaves him. He can't get out of bed in the mornings, he rarely leaves the house if he can avoid it, he has days where he can't eat or sleep, he's underweight and always tired and generally known to lack energy and be slow (or 'lazy') and in some cases listless and despondent. Ban even says that he wouldn't put it past Yuki to start slitting his wrists. And it's subtle, but there's one more really big one that really never goes away for him, even after he finds Ban.

2.2: "I don't need anyone to love me."

I'll get straight to the point. Yuki hates himself. Maybe only a little bit, maybe only sometimes, but it's there. Especially when he struggles with composing - he even says it himself in part 1 of his birthday photobook rabbit chat, almost immediately after saying that it made him want to kill himself but we'll get back to that part.

But it's really everywhere on what seems to be a mostly subconscious level for him, if you know how to look, even from the very beginning:

On paper, this line is just his frustration with being judged by anything other than his music, because it's something he cares a lot about and puts a lot of work into and he wants that to be acknowledged. But I think that if you take it in conjunction with some of the other things he tends to say, there's a little bit more to it.

I dont need anyone to love me. Yuki's songs are worthy of love. Yuki is not. There is nothing valuable about Yuki other than his songs, he has nothing else that deserves any sort of praise, and without them, he's just a useless burden with nothing to offer. He doesn't need anyone to love him - he doesn't understand why anyone would. And Momo does, and he's a good person, and Yuki doesn't deserve that when there's nothing he can actually do for him. And when that starts to change and he starts getting better at showing kindness to others and being there for Momo, he doesn't see it as learning to better express his feelings, he sees is as learning to feel affection and be a good person, because he believes that he is inherently not. As far as he can tell, Yuki is just naturally a bad person and a bad partner who isn't kind and isn't capable of love or compassion, not unless he tries to be. He knows, because he's heard it god knows how many times - even Chiba Shizuo blatantly tells him that neither of them can become good people - and maybe things are different now, but on some basic level it'll always be who he is.

Ok breaking character for a second, imagine you show up to your acting side gig and on the first day Keanu Reeves comes up to you and gives you $300 cash and then later he indirectly tells you that you're a nasty lonely egotistical failure. Now imagine you're Yuki and you have no fucking clue who Keanu Reeves is. He also shows you pictures of his top secret illegitimate son after talking to you for like 10 minutes and you have to lie to him about being straight. I think this is objectively the funniest situation to be in ever. Chiba Shizuo and Yamato both probably have depression also, but I'm not gonna spend any time on it, because every three months a person is torn to pieces by a crocodile in Northern Queensland. I forgot what I was talking about. Anyway

2.3: Hey remember that one time Yuki just straight up tried to kill himself

Yeah, that one. As far as I know this is really never addressed or acknowledged again, so we're just gonna take the page-long gag from Re:member at face value and say that after Ban's disappearance, Yuki (almost) attempted suicide, and the only reason he didn't go through with it is because he couldn't find anywhere to hang the noose. And like, yeah you could say it's just because he thought Ban might have killed himself and he's always been the kind of hopeless romantic to be waxing poetic about how "I can't live without you," but at the same time, he had no apparent reason to believe this (even if Ban did have suicidal tendencies I doubt Yuki would've really known), and he was planning to go through with it (I know it's probably just for comedic effect but he left a will. He left a will. He's, like, 20, and surely not the kind of person who would just have something like that in order already). This is also emphatically not the last time or the only reason he thinks about it.

I told you we'd get back to the photobook chat! I think there's also a lot you can infer from all the times he says he'd probably be dead by now without Momo and he wouldn't be able to handle losing him, what with the whole "when you jump, you'd better take me with you" thing. But regardless, this really isn't just that one time that Yuki tried to kill himself. It's suicidal ideation, and it's something he consistently struggles with especially in the few months after Ban leaves him. It even comes up in how he sees the 'paranormal activity' his new apartment:

2.4: "It seemed as though someone had hung themselves there."

Yeah it's the ghost I'm finally gonna talk about the ghost. I'm done with my Yuki has depression rant we can talk about why the ghost is Yuki now. I guess it might be more accurate to say that the ghost is Yuki's depression/suicidal thoughts/Banri trauma/whatever, but either way I think it represents him and he might also be semi-consciously projecting onto it, and I'm gonna go through line-by-line and try to explain my interpretation.

I think if you want to there's definitely room to take the 'usual paranormal activity' super literally and say that Yuki was having outbursts and slamming doors at the time (which would also match up with him being startled by it). I think it's also important to note that this is happening around the time he mentions feeling suicidal and not being able to compose in the photobook chat, but the main thing here is that second line. Even though Momo is always so nice to him, he can't stop himself from getting mad and being difficult and depressed, and he can't return that kindness - he can't even be useful to him.

I've already mentioned how I think Yuki's conclusion about the stain here plays into his suicidal ideation, but let's look at it a little more thematically. It's the way that even though it's glossed over earlier in the manga, Yuki's suicide attempt and everything that accompanied it still follows him, and it hangs (lol) heavy in their house like a ghost. To Yuki, it's startling and eerie - it scares him, and he's expecting it to scare Momo once he sees that side of him too. And it probably does scare him a little, and he hesitates, but he doesn't scream. Again, there's room to interpret this more literally as Momo finding out about his attempt/ideation/depression, or just as him inevitably seeing how he gets on his worse days, but either way the outcome is the same. Momo is starting to know Yuki as a person instead of an idol, flaws and probable mental illness and all, and his first reaction isn't to shy away or start to hate him or want to leave. It's an introduction. He makes it clear that they'll both be staying here from now on, that he's willing to live with the 'darker' sides of Yuki, and to help him do the same. Another point on this that's up to interpretation (because let's be real they're probably never gonna deal with this stuff explicitly in canon), you could see the whole ghost thing as neither of them really being able/wanting to accept that Yuki's symptoms are actually a part of him (and this is veering completely into fanfic territory but now I'm just imagining both of them silently agreeing to blame the things Yuki does on bad days on the ghost) but we've had enough angst for one day.

Everything else lines up well enough with the ghost and Yuki, but it's really his reaction here that sells the whole thing for me. It's a simple gesture, but just by Momo greeting him, being by his side, waiting for him when he comes home, that constant reminder of all his darkest thoughts becomes just another mark on the floorboards. It's not gone, and it probably never will be. But at least now, he doesn't have to face it alone. And it doesn't look so scary anymore.

2.5: "Now I know joy, and the meaning of a smile."

I must confess that I lied to all of you earlier. I'm actually not done with my Yuki rant and also there's a good reason I've been ignoring all the parts of Re:member where he isn't being self-deprecating or trying to kill himself. The end of the ghost scene is only the beginning of the end of this analysis, and the end of this analysis is pretty much just me having a meltdown about Yuki. Also I'm running out of space for images so we're doing some of the quotes like this instead.

After losing Ban, I lost my dreams, friends, and passion as well. I could only feel a sting as the wind passed through an empty, gaping hole in my chest. But I breathed as best as I could, and he tried to clear the dirt out of that hole, filling it with his earnest words instead.

Yuki still exhibits a lot of symptoms of depression all the way through the series, like the low energy and the trouble eating and sleeping, and [redacted part 5 spoilers] makes me think there's definitely some sort of connection between his writers' block and his depressive episodes. He still mentions feeling guilty towards Banri in second beat, the suicidal ideation doesn't really come up explicitly but he kinda hints at it on a few occassions, and he's very adament that he was a bad person and still isn't really a good one. But it's like. I don't really know how to put this, but I guess it's not his default state anymore like it was right after Ban left (and possibly before that, too). For the most part, he really does get better, and these things become less intense and fewer and farther between. He would probably say that it's all thanks to Momo, and it is, but he also very much does it of his own volition. Momo refuses so desperately to give up on him, and because of that he makes that choice to keep going by restarting Re:vale with him.

Yuki allows himself to let someone else in and start to love again - his partner, his music, his life. Even while he's thinking that he's just a burden to those around him, he doesn't resign himself to his fate like he might have done in the past. He's determined to become a better person, someone who can be a source of strength for Momo just like he was for him. And in the end, he does, but it's not just that. Now he knows joy. Now he can genuinely smile. And now,

I want to hear them scream my name. The voices that called out had annoyed me in the past. But now, I'll smile, together with Momo, who'll be by my side.

Going back to what I said about some of Yuki's subconscious self-hatred coming through in the way he wants people to look at his music and not at him, I. Cannot finish a sentence. Do NOT think about Yuki learning to love himself and see himself as worthy of love because Momo loved him just that much in a way that he could accept. BAD IDEA. Okay. So. It's Ban's advice and Momo's fan letter that get Yuki to accept that his fans do genuinely love his music in the first place, and I think it's here that it really starts to turn into him accepting the idea that they love other things about him too? Or that he really starts to want it and be happy about it instead of just accepting it? Whatever. I give up. I don't even like Re:vale anyway

That day, I would play the guitar I'd almost thrown at Kujou, because I now knew the power of a song that could not be silenced. I would dry my tears, open the door, and say, "I'm home."

[myfandomrealitea]

Honestly I'm getting really tired of how people treat celebrities.

People act like they're circus animals that exist solely to dance for their entertainment, and that being a celebrity means they don't deserve to have any boundaries or dignity or privacy.

Like I always see posts going "Oh boo hoo people are being mean to the poor celebrity, maybe they can wipe away their tears with their money while the rest of us starve :(" and it's like what the fuck are you talking about.

Them being famous and having a lot of money (although a lot of celebrities aren't actually super rich, which no one ever wants to acknowlege) doesn't give people the right to treat them the way they do.

Being rich means nothing if people are stalking you and breaking into your house and sending you unhinged love letters.

Being rich means nothing if people are taking pictures of your fucking children so they can sell the pictures to magazines.

Being rich means nothing if people are following you every time you're in public (or even in private!) so they can try and take a picture of you doing something embarassing or scandalous.

I'm honestly surprised there aren't more cases of celebrities having mental breakdowns and losing their shit due to the amount of harassment, stalking, and invasion of privacy they face.

Leave these goddamn people alone for fuck's sake.

I always see people saying:

"Its what you sign up for when you become famous."

And I just. No. So much no. No?? Non??? Nada.

Like yes when you're famous a certain amount of your privacy erodes because you become a public figure. Its in the name. But the way celebrities are literally treated like nothing more than creatures that exist for us to consume and observe and dictate and judge is fucking insane. We learned nothing from Britney Spears, apparently.

Celebrities have become such a disconnected reality from 'general living' that we are so fucking out of touch with the fact that they're literally just human beings. Eminem made a song about it and people just laughed it off as a great musical plotline and 'haha funny Stan lets turn it into fandom culture slang.' One Direction had to hide in unmarked trade vans and book out entire airports (which then got hacked) just to try to travel without getting mobbed. Toby Maguire got branded as 'rude and aggressive' for yelling at paparazzi who literally surrounded his car and blocked him from leaving a car park so they could take photos of him.

Celebrities should not have to take out contracts and protection orders and press gags just so they can raise their children in peace or take them on a fucking walk. Celebrities should not have to cover tattoos honoring their dead mother because some clown who thinks it'll turn into a Y/N moments replicates it without any care for its actual meaning. Celebrity nudes and sex tapes get hacked and leaked and the celebrity is simultaneously blamed for it and sexualised to absolute hell for it.

"Sources" are constantly selling-literally selling- private information about people and their lives and families and its just?? Considered so fucking normal?? Imagine having a miscarriage and finding out three days later that your co-worker sold that information to a news outlet and its now front-page news globally?

Imagine organising a secret, small wedding so you can have that special day with the person you love without it being ruined and you find out the fucking priest told the Daily Mail it was happening so your special day consists of hoards of photographers yelling at you while you try to speak your vows?

Honestly I believe we do need stricter regulations and laws regarding this kind of thing. I firmly believe in the freedom of photography in public spaces but I also firmly believe that should absolutely not cover paparazzi literally stalking people, mobbing them, blocking them in alleyways and parking lots, using telescopic lenses to take photographs inside their houses, ect. It simply shouldn't.

People need to start imagining themselves and their family members in these types of situations and recognise that its fucking inhumane.

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

Questioning npd culture is... (Half a vent)

"do I actually do that or do I just think I do?"

"Well I think like that all the time but it's not like I ever do anything about it"

"no one else would ever think of me like that so it must not be true"

"ok but is that a symptom or am I just a shitty person?"

"am I a hater or am I just actually right about everything all the time? Is me having an ego wrong or am I just actually perfect?"

"am I blowing things out of proportion or is wanting you to die a justified response to this situation?"

"if they don't answer me they must hate me and want me dead so I must have showed them how awful of a human being I actually am"

"is the disorder defined by what I do? Or is just thinking this type of shit enough to be a problem?"

"yeah I've always had this idea that I was going to be famous and loved forever and i break down when I think about how that's probably not going to happen and I'm supposed to be just like any other person because I'm Not, i'm different than all of them and i deserve to be remembered more than they do, but that's not me being irrational, i'm just confident in my own abilities" (i'm not)

"is this a normal level of confidence or am I getting an ego about this because people are praising me? but yeah I am just better at it than everyone else"

"yes getting in arguments online makes me so fucking anxious but it's the only place I can do it without real consequences and honestly I don't care about this at all I just want an excuse to laugh at you because it makes me feel better about myself"

"i don't think I could ever be able to accurately recognize this in myself but i also don't think anyone else could either unless I told them specifically (and then it wouldn't feel genuine, I'd feel like I just manipulated them and i'm faking because I want to seem 'edgy' or something)"

.

[sparkypantaloons]

Metronomics

Sometimes it's too much, Gotham. Too much putting his body on the line for a city that can't and won't change.

Bruce imagines what his life could have been, what his children's lives could have been, if things had been different.

~~

Sometimes it's too much. Gotham. Too polluted, too populated, to poor...

Morally poor, he should say. The money's never been more than a means to an end for Bruce and he's never cared who has or hasn't got it. Even if he knows that's evidence enough of how out of touch he really is. To not be, and never have been, the levels of desperate so many of his fellow Gothamites have. Are. But he can't change that now. Not after a lifetime of more money than he could ever hope to spend (and God knows he's tried).

And it's not that he thinks poverty equals moral corruptness. Of course not. But God, if it doesn't cause a rot that's hard to escape. An agony deep in the bones, like an atomic bomb. Almost a century since, but still poisoning the ground and the air and the lives where it fell.

It's too much, sometimes. Gotham. Decades of putting his body, his heart, mind on the line for a city that doesn't change and can't change and... Won't.

Part of his Brucie-rich-boy-bit has always been a pretend man of the people. 'Billionaire spotted on Chicago's L-train', a picture of him in $5,000 jeans, throwing a peace sign on the platform at Quincy. 'Bruce Wayne joins the commute on Bangkok's BTS Skytrain' sunburned and sweaty and grinning like a moron. Public transport is easy when you don't need it. The delays, the overcrowding, the cost. All part of the big adventure when you're rich and famous.

He's deliberate in his appearances. Shows up too big to be allowed and always lost. Asking fellow travellers for directions and breaking every unspoken, local rule. Stopping at the bottom of escalators and standing on the right and never having his ticket ready at the barriers... but he's deliberate in his anonymity too.

He's ridden the New York subway and Shanghai's metro and Vienna's U-bahn more times than he can count. Undercover, trailing marks and tailing suspects, slipping past local police and resident gangsters alike. Just another nameless face in the crowd.

But then there's the times he's just there as himself. Times he rides the lines as Bruce. Not the billionaire, not the Bat. Just Bruce. Grey Ghost fan, hates mushrooms, loves dinosaurs. Father, friend, son. Just another traveller amidst the millions. Nobody wanting anything from him, nobody talking to him, nobody even noticing him. It's freedom unlike any he's ever known.

It makes him wonder what his life might have been. If he hadn't been born in the South Wing's master bedroom of Wayne Manor. What his children's lives might have been, if their father had just been a man, and not this man.

Dick for sure, Olympic medallist. There's no doubt. Even without the money and the training and the classes, his boy was destined for greatness. Gold medals and podiums and adoration. Coaching and teaching and leading. And, Bruce fancies, probably the ESPN correspondent for major competitions. Team USA coach. International Olympic Committee. Whatever Dick wanted; in any life there's nothing he couldn't do.

Cass, Bruce likes to think, would have been an architect. If she'd ever been afforded a normal life, ever been given the tender love and care she so deserved as a child. She reads people with ease, drilled into her as it was by Cain; a skill as crucial as its learning was cruel. But given a normal life? Architecture, Bruce is sure. The way she navigates space, the way she uses it and understands it. What better way to make a life than creating in the space she so fully inhabits? Designing structures that change the way people live, challenge how they think. She'd have been glorious.

Tim, on the other hand... Tim. If Bruce thinks about him too long the guilt starts to set in. His brilliant boy, just next door; alone for so long. Bruce was intimately familiar with the experience, though at least he'd had Alfred when he'd been young. If only he'd just paid more attention, he could have— anyway. In another time, one where Bruce rides the subway and to work and Tim doesn't spend the first decade of his life by himself, surely he'd be some fintech billionaire wizz kid by now. He'd have created a Facebook or eBay or Venmo. But better. Kinder. Richer probably than Bruce, now. And he'd still ride the metro next to his old man.

Damian, Bruce's youngest, sweetest boy. Who knows what Damian could have been, in a life where Bruce and Talia kissed each other goodbye every morning and sweet dreams each night. He's a gentle soul, really, fierce as he is. Shows it in his affection for animals. Gives them the tenderness he never had as a child. Who knows what he could have been in a life filled with light instead of shadow. Warmth and love instead of the League's relentless dark. A scientist maybe, or an astronaut. A teacher, a vet, a nurse. Whatever he wanted. A gardener, a piano tuner, a cab driver. Happy, whatever it was. And safe in the knowledge he was loved.

And then... and then, Jason. Bruce thinks of his second son the most, as he rides the rails. Takes the Bakerloo south from Marylebone and the Tanamachi west to Hirano. What Jason could have been, if things had been different. It doesn't seem fair to dwell on it. To imagine the darling, sweet boy who had been Robin as anything but. To disrespect the incredible fucking gift he's already been given of a second chance, by imagining it as any different. So instead he thinks that Jason would still be Robin. Still Red Hood. Still saving people, still putting himself on the line to make the world better. Even if Bruce didn't love the way he did it, he still loved Jason. Gods did he love him. It's too much, sometimes.

Gotham. Sometimes she's too much. But most of the time, most of the time she was everything. His home, his children's home.

To see the sun rise from the east corner of the clocktower with Cass and swing between the crumbling art deco blocks of Coventry, Dick by his side. Racing down her labyrinth of alleyways and side streets with Tim and even negotiating her sewers with Damian. And Jason. Just seeing Jason's face, scowling at him though it usually is, as he waits outside the Collins Street station for Bruce to arrive.

"Your late." He grunts, as Bruce climbs the steps of the subway. He looks at his watch irritably. "If we miss brunch, you're paying."

"Of course," Bruce says, a warm hand on Jason's shoulder as they begin to walk. "Anything for you, chum."

She's too much, sometimes. Gotham. But most of the time? She's exactly where he wants to be

[0lshadyl0]

Hiii !! can you write some generals yandere headcanons about flashy flash from one punch man please ? Nsfw or sfw or a mix of both it doesn't bother me ^^ Off course take your time you have the right to refuse the request, good health to you ^^*

I love ninjas and I really like One Punch Man (my favorites are Saitama, Sonic, Amai Mask, Flashy Flash and Zombieman), so much so that I have an OC for this series (which I'm still looking for a good name for her)

This request was definitely made for me

Flashy Flash Yandere Headcanons

Ok, as I mentioned before, I like ninjas and I like Flashy Flash, but let's be honest, his personality isn't the best, in fact, it sucks

This guy doesn't even consider people weaker than him, he doesn't pay attention to them and basically acts like they're stones in his way, he's proud, arrogant and borders on rude

So sorry to all the civilian darlings, this ninja won't even notice you beyond saving you and leaving you in a safe place

So at the very least, to get his attention you have to be an A-class heroine in the highest ranks (top 3) or be an S-class heroine like him, and even then it takes more than just power to get his full attention, with power you get his interest, but if it were only that he would have noticed Tatsumaki in a more romantic and not challenging way

This ninja's level of narcissism can rival Amai Mask, so in addition to being a strong heroine you must be very pretty, to the level of beauty that as soon as you appear in a room all eyes turn to you

Basically you have to be a mix of supermodel and strength equal to or greater than him, oh and you must also be incredibly fast because he doesn't wait for anyone

Having already specified how to get his attention, we are going to go to the behavior as a yandere, he is aware that his feelings are not normal, due to his upbringing as a ninja (where they were taught to suppress all emotion and become perfect weapons), but on the other hand, he feels that he has suffered enough and he also deserves to be happy and have a relationship (because first him, second him, third him)

His darling won't notice that he's interested in her thanks to his poker face and cold demeanor, she won't even notice that he's following her, because yes, he's a high-level stalker, when he wants to meet you to get closer to you he'll investigate your entire life and past so that there are no surprises for him

Also, it's a good way to know how to approach you and court you, even though he's terrible at it because he has zero experience in that field

When he finds out what city you live in, he'll patrol the area you live in so that both you (although it's not necessary since you're strong) and your home are safe from any monsters that decide to attack the city, consider it an act of love

Although he's a solo worker, you're a clear exception to the rule so whether you like it or not you'll work as a team with him (although he'll try to do everything just to keep you safe/impress you), basically you'll be there to cheer him on

At some point he would have considered kidnapping you if it weren't for the fact that you're strong and very famous, your disappearance would attract a lot of unwanted attention so he discarded the idea

He watches you at night when you sleep (when he has free time to do so of course), he knows by heart what your home looks like inside and sometimes he uses drugs to make sure you don't wake up so he can lay down next to you and on the nights when he feels extra naughty he can touch you inappropriately, he's a tits man so they'll get his most attention (size doesn't matter, boobs are boobs)

Even so, he'll wait for both of you to get into a relationship to initiate sexual relations (not because he's respectful or romantic but because he's a virgin with very little interaction with women and is just researching the female body)

[just-some-guy-joust]

Just Some Guy OC Tourney - Side A: Round 3

Rules:

do NOT be mean to anyone or any characters in these polls. you MUST clarify if you are joking/teasing or you will be blocked. if you are someone who entered an oc into this and you are mean to other contestants you will be disqualified

do NOT claim a character doesn't deserve to be here. yes including your own. be nice

if you are posting propaganda you have to @ tag us, including if your propaganda is in the reblogs. it is difficult to tell when something is or isn't propaganda. anything not tagging us will likely be missed

please don't hesitate to let me know if i messed something up!

have fun, hype each other up <3 thank you

Jaiden Wells | She/her | @apotheoseity

Jaiden is.. really just some girl. A college student and avid Tumblr user, many of the people she's close to are wrapped up into supernatural or otherwise out-of-this-world situations, but she's just.. not. Everyone around her is terrified that she'll be exposed to some sort of horror, and at some points she's jealous of the people around her for leading such interesting lives, but she remains.. utterly mundane.

Promos: https://toyhou.se/16595108.jaiden-wells

~

Adan Botello | He/him | @rainecloud020604

Adan is a highschooler who is just looking to pass class, go home and play Minecraft. He doesn't want to be unique or special any more than he is, maybe being a Minecraft YouTuber would be awesome but that's all he wants out of life. No matter what is thrown at him he tends to run away from it, like a fantasy world trying to claim he's a prince, he wants nothing to do with it. He just wants to be a normal kid, graduate high school and play Minecraft. He's also got transgender and autistic swag

Promos: https://toyhou.se/17322997.adan-botello check out the comic featuring Adan on this blog @a-tale-in-a-bottle

~

Wally Rosette | He/him | @hershelchocolateart

Wally Rosette is a 15-year-old kid who was chosen (and then kidnapped) to attend the Elite Villainous International Learning facility. This position, however, is solely because his parents were world-famous villains. Wally himself has no interest in the business, and is often described as the sweetest person any of the cast has ever met. He spends most of his time in the background, helping out faculty and students with their homework or various tasks, and only ever becoming relevant when homework *is* the plot of the week. Wally is just a kind kid who knows better than to get involved in the plot and loves his friends so so so so so so so fucking much it's unreal

Promos: https://toyhou.se/8256045.wally-rosette <-wallys toyhouse profile! https://www.webtoons.com/en/canvas/the-villain-school/list?title_no=97541 <-the comic he's in (discontinued because I'm doing a different one - it is 6/40 chapters with a planned remake Somewhere in the distant future)

~

Full images and descriptions under the cut!

[no extra description provided]

Despite the fact all he desires to be is just some guy the universe keeps trying to make him more than some guy. He's supposed to be a hero, a prince, but he keeps running from the idea of it so much he ends up in another world entirely and all he wants is to go home and be normal, all he wants! He's not looking to save his sister, she can save herself she's strong. He just wants to go home :( that's all he really wants in life and he's getting really tired of the universe saying otherwise

THIS IS MY VERY FAVORITE BABY BOY So Wally is a sweet kid, but because his parents were world-famous, he never really got a choice in who they raised him to be. This resulted in him having a BUNCH of self-worth issues that he tries to deal with on the side because he doesn't want to get his friends involved. He has two (2) major points in the plot (OUT OF 40 CHAPTERS)- one plot point where he ignores the main antagonist to get a boyfriend instead, and one where his entire arc finally culminates in "Wally Learns How To Say No To People." Outside of that, he does NOTHING regarding the main plot and is a C plot character at best. He is simply involved and there in the background because I love him so much and he is my precious little baby boy and yeah sure maybe I loved him so much I made 27 alternate universe versions of him that all have plot relevance in all my stuff but *this* wally is simply a boy and he is blue and he is lovely and I would kill and cry for him every day

[ayoalex]

My biggest reason of why I HATE the fact Zuko is Fire Lord is more complicated than I could actually explain but I will try. Cuz u see I already hate the fact that 16/17y old Zuko had to step up and be Fire Lord even though an actual adult could have been the Fire Lord while Zuko still grew and learn to be able to be a decent Fire Lord.

I already hate the fact that is canon he SUCKS at it cuz he has 0 communication skills, only knows anger and violence to resolve things and has 0 diplomacy. If it was supposed to be his destiny then why he sucks so much, why he doesn't know a single thing about politics, I think about his actions in The Promise and I feel like slapping the writer.

But when I think about how he gives 0 fucks about his people then I hate it even more.

Wait, don't go, listen to me. LISTEN TO ME I WILL EXPLAIN MYSELF.

Ok, so Zuko by the end of Book 3 is a traitor in the Fire Nation, ok?

He goes and fights an Agni Kai in his sister (the legitimate heir at this point) coronation. We don't know if everyone knows what actually happened there (probably they do cuz the Fire Sages were there when he arrived with Katara).

So he actually loses! And it's Katara that ends up winning. So he ends up winning the throne by not only force but with foreign forces as well.

Ok now let's remember his coronation. Who do we see? A single line of Fire Nation people which I think we're the Fire Sages + Mai and Iroh. And then all foreigners which one of them is the person that took by force the throne. Not a public coronation, we don't see any other citizen of his Nation watching it.

Ok, let's remember how people were living outside of Caldera city and Ember island.

One of the Villages the Gaang end up of the Fire Nation has polluted water. The army has been polluting their water for YEARS which indicates us that they haven't actually been taking care of majority of the Villages/cities outside of Caldera city and Ember Island, the first one because is the capital and where the Royalty + Nobility lives and the second one because is a famous tourist place that Nobility and the Royalty goes to.

Zuko as a kid that grew up isolated in Caldera city, which he didn't went out that much outside of the castle(?) Has never had to face or see how actual normal people live. He then gets banished but still feels entitled to be treated like royalty.

After getting his title stripped in Book 2, he still refuses to live amongst the people and continues asking for a royalty treatment. So he ends up stealing from OTHER common people.

He lived in the lower ring of the Earth Kingdom and I never saw him understanding that the King just sucks, that he's supposed to help all his citizens but only cares about the rich and gives 0 fucks about the rest.

Now, why does Zuko wants to be Fire Lord? To make things better? To actually help his Nation?

No. It's because of destiny. He doesn't see it as a duty. Sure he wants to end the war which is a good thing but he once again sees the title as something he deserves because it's his destiny (which makes 0 zero but ok).

And I wish so badly he had Azula resolve and understanding of his duty.

Cuz you see she would probably sucked too cuz like Zuko she had 0 idea how normal people actually live and that rich people are NOT the majority of a Nation.

But she would not think being Fire Lord is her destiny and she deserves it cuz she's pretty or whateva. She would understand her duty as Fire Lord and would accept the title as such, with the respect and responsibility it comes with (which kinda happened in canon but she was in the middle of a breakdown so yeah).

And I'm not trying to compare them but sometimes is so hard cuz she has everything Zuko needs to be a good Fire Lord and so it's frustrating seeing the canon state of the world in Aang's era because the writers suck ass and think Zuko is oohhh so charming and amazing when honestly he suck ass right now.

Bring me back my dumbass kid! Let him out of that castle!

I think if he actually travel around Fire Nation without u know all his privileges, he would do much better cuz at least he would understand the actual needs of his Nation.

And honestly if I was a citizen of the Fire Nation and saw all the bullshit that was happening I would be so fucking annoyed at the Royal Family, like if someone told me to do a coup I would be so into it cuz honestly I'm here dying cuz we've been at war for 100y and this motherfucker comes and just prioritize other nations that the one giving him money and food? Yeah we going democracy, fuck the monarchy.

In my mind Azula just says fuck it and goes mia for YEARS and Aang sees the disaster that FN is cuz of Zuko and goes find her cuz everyone know Azula is like the best option when it's about politics and then he finds out she's been traveling so he joins her and Azula comes back to the FN but just to slap Zuko and teach him how to actually be a decent Fire Lord and then goes back to chilling but sometimes pop off at Caldera to slap Zuko when he does a fucking terrible decision.

[elacular-kink]

Hicvember 26: Least favorite OC

I dunno that I have any least favorite OCs, even to the extent that I have OCs at all, but I feel like I haven't done as much with Maya, though I could be wrong about that. So here's her flying too close to the sun in a story inspired by a comment from our esteemed Fish Writer on the very first Poly-techhic story. I think this'd take place sometime near the end of Olivia and Susanna's first year in college.

Contents: Hiccups, Arousal, painful hiccups, stomach chest and throat pain, hurt/comfort, big feelings, mush, references to sex-type stuff.

"Maya, have you ever considered physically exploding or throwing yourself into the sun?"

I couldn't help laughing at Susie, and I could see her bright red face get brighter and redder when I kept hiccuping super hard at her. "I me–*HEEK* mean, I kinda di–*CULP* did that alr–*HUCK*–ready, right? *HIULK-UK!*–g-guh!" Spread out in front of me were plates of bones from the hot wings I had slaughtered and devoured. I was so fucking full and my whole throat and chest and guts were on fire, and my huge fucking hiccups hurt like a bitch, but it was so worth it to see Susie squirm.

And squirm she fucking did. No matter how low she pulled her hood, even if she managed to hide all of her face, she couldn't hide how wiggly her hips were or the way her voice would catch when I hiccuped especially hard. "You're evil. You're evil and you're going to hell and they're going to crown you the queen bitch of the second circle."

"Hey, if I'm go–*HOK-ULK!* gonna go the–*URK* anyway, wh–*HIUK* why not go there *HNK* famous? *HNK-LK!* Nhnhf! Fuck, ow..."

"You deserve that. Whatever you're feeling right now, you definitely deserve it."

"No–*HOK* Not gonna arg---gue with you the–*HURK* there, champ." I rubbed my chest. Thank fuck my sports bra was mostly keeping my titties in place, or this would suck even more. And even though I didn't regret shit, I couldn't pretend I was having the best time in the world. "I'll be re–*HEEK* real, Susie, it'd pro–*HOK-LK*–ooohbly be be–*URK* best to keep thi–*CULP* this shit short. *HRK-LK*–g-guh. And you prob---bly don't want my fi–*HNKG*–gers or tongue ne–*URK* near anything imp–*HUP*–p-portant, so," I leaned back to give her a good view, ignoring the weird twinge in my stomach. "How 'b–*BUK*–bout we go somepl–*ULK* someplace private an–*HNK*–and you ha–*ULK* have a ride on thi–*URK* this big, stu–*HULK* stuffed gu–*HIUK–UK!*–guh, fuck!" I'd slapped my big, stuffed gut, and I didn't even do it that hard, but as soon as I did, everything fucking hurt and I wound up doubled over and tearing up, just trying to keep a hold on myself.

"Shit, Maya, are you okay?" Susie stood up, and a second later she came around the table. I could feel her hand hovering over my back and I wished she'd just fucking rub it or something, but fuckin'...

"*HIULK*–g-guh! *HURK!* Sonofa–*HIULK-HUK!* *HUKOLP!* Fuck, jesus fu–*HUCK*–christ!" They'd gotten faster, and now every single one was hurting.

"Fuck. Okay, hang on, lemme get you some water." Normally I'd argue with Susie on that one, but chrissake, yeah, I needed this shit to stop. Crap, I'd have to make up for winding her up like that later. My mouth was feeling way too hot again, and my stupid eyes were filling with tears, and fuck if that wasn't fucking humiliating. Especially in the middle of the goddamn cafeteria. I didn't wanna be seen crying like a bitch, I was the one who made people cry and moan and feel all sorts of shit.

I heard Susie running up to me. She was so much quicker than she thought she was. "Fuck, got some of it on my—whatever, doesn't matter. Here." She put down two mostly-full plastic cups of water. That was sweet of her. She knew it'd only take one sip to cure me, but she wanted to make sure. Goddamn. What a good girl. I grabbed whichever one was closer to my hands and slurped down a faceful of water, feeling just how uncomfortably full I was more and more. The water didn't help my burning face, because of course it didn't, but I didn't expect it to. Susie's hand landed uncertainly on my shoulder, and I could feel that she'd gotten the sleeve of her hoodie wet. "You okay?"

"Y-yeh, yeah, dude, I'm f–*HIURK!*–k-kuh!" I doubled over again, and I knew my eyes were practically bugging out of my head. "What...what the fu–*HUCK!*"

"Shit!" Susie pulled her hand away, and I really wished she'd knock that shit off, but that was pretty fucking far from my biggest complaint right now. "Fuck, uh...drink more?"

"N–*HOLK* no shit, Su–*HOOK* Sue-lock Ho–*OLK-ULK!*–ooohhhfuck..." I knew I was being a bitch, but fuck, my stomach kept fucking bouncing and burning and my chest and my face were on fire and these fucking hiccups were making my throat hurt and Jesus fucking christ I needed more water. But every swallow was a struggle to get down, and the whole glass felt like I'd tried to drink a gallon of milk. And even when I got all of it down—"*HURK!*–GUH! F-fuck, Sues–*HIUK!* Christ! Why wo–*HOLK!* won't it *HUKULK! HUK!* G-gaaahhhh! *HAULK!* Fuck!"

Fuck, was I actually crying now? It felt like tears were going down my fucking face. Jesus, what the fuck? But it hurt so much. Why the fuck was my body doing this to me? It was my fucking body! It did what I want and it was fucking good at it! What the fuck was this shit?!

...I remembered reading about some motherfucker who had the hiccups for 69 not fucking nice at all years.

And Christ, now I was crying even more about the stupidest shit in the universe and my hiccups were getting worse and that just made everything hurt more and fucking—

"Okay, I'm bringing you someplace else." I managed to open my eyes and look up at Susie, and I just barely saw that her face was still crazy red before she grabbed my hand and pulled me up off the seat. Trying to straighten up made my whole stomach scream at me, so I just kind of grabbed onto her and leaned on her. Somewhere in my head, I felt like shit that I was kind of teasing her or something, because my hiccups just kept coming, but I couldn't even think about sex right now. This wasn't fucking sexy pain. This felt like I was getting stabbed and drinking lava all at the same time every few fucking seconds.

I kind of expected her to just drag me to a bathroom since that was apparently where she went whenever she panicked, but instead, she brought me out of the building and into one I'd probably been in for some class or another at some point, but fuck if I could tell you what. I was barely paying attention to where we were going anyway. At some point, she opened up a door, then sighed softly. "Okay, nobody's here. Cool." She sat me down in an acceptable plastic chair, and I wiped my eyes and looked around and saw that I was in some sort of big semicircle room with wide stair-type floors and weird panels on the walls. In the back, I could see a xylophone and some kind of drums, though it didn't look like the kind of drums that Susie'd play. When I looked at her, she'd closed the door behind her, and I could see a sign through the only kinda see-through window. "Nobody'll bug us here, and the soundproofing's pretty good, so you don't have to worry about being heard or anything. I've, uh, I've called Olivia and she'll be bringing over a milkshake if you can drink any more. That might help." She was looking away from me really hard. Fucking doofus. She was doing that thing where she tries not to be turned on when she clearly fucking was. "But if you want me to leave you alone, I can step out and—"

"Dude, do–*HOULK* don't you fu–*UCK* fucking dare." I didn't wanna be fucking alone like this.

...I mean, I also kinda didn't wanna be around anyone like this, but I didn't wanna be alone more than I didn't wanna be seen.

"Uh, okay. Yeah, okay." Susie rocked back and forth. "So, uh, do you want me to kind of—" I dragged a chair in arm's reach next to me and smacked it. "Got it." Thank fuck she actually did get it, because she walked over and sat down, and when I pointed at my back, she got that too and started rubbing it, and it helped a tiny bit. "You're okay, Maya. It's gonna be okay."

"Fuck, Su–*HIUK* Susie..." I snorted and tried to wipe my face on my arm, but that precious fucking idiot caught my hand, then used her hoodie to clean me off. "Why are y–*HOULK* you so fucking–*HNKG!*–nnnnh!"

"S-sorry," I looked up at her and saw that she was looking away. "I, uh, I know you're hurting and I really shouldn't be—"

"Sweet." She looked at me and I swatted the back of her head. "Why a–*URK* are you so–*HIOLK* so fucking sw–*HEET*. That's th–*IURK* the question, stu–*HOOK* stupid."

"Ah—" She looked away, but I got to see her smiling before she did, and that made things feel a little less lava-stabbed. "I mean, this is, uh...this is kind of my fault so—OW!"

I'd smacked the back of her head harder this time and she glared at me. I glared right back. "You d–*CULP* didn't ma–*UCK* make me e–*HEUK* eat those wi–*HNGK*s, you fu–*HULK* fucki–*NGK* di–*HIC* dick–*HURK* dickhe–*EULK* oh god–*HULK!* *HICCULP* *HIULK* *HUCK* *HIUP* *HUCK-HUCK-HUCK–HICCOLP!* FUCK! Je---Jesus fucking *HLK* Christ!"

I was doubled over in pain again, and my throat felt so fucked up while my stomach was jerking out and making everything in it make weird fucking noises that I knew turned Susie on and I hoped that all my other shit was too loud for her to hear it because fuck if that girl needed more stupid shit to feel guilty about. One hand kept rubbing my back, and then her other landed on my stomach, very gently rubbing it too. I sat up and got a look at her, and the moron instantly pulled away. "S-sorry! Sorry, I shouldn't—" I rolled my eyes and dragged her stupid cold tiny hand back to my belly. "A-ah...y-yeah. Okay." She started rubbing it again, and it didn't take away much of the bad feelings, but at least there was some good too.

After...fuck if I knew, some number of minutes, the door opened up and Liv came in, a slushy in one hand and a vanilla milkshake in the other. "I know you like mint chocolate better, but I think that could be weird with the spiciness. Hi Susanna." Susie nodded and Liv dragged a chair over to my other side, shoving the milkshake into my hands. I had no idea if I'd actually be able to drink any of it, my stomach felt way too fucking full already, but I at least took a sip and kept it in my mouth. "Since we're in the music room anyway, I brought your guitar." 

I looked up and saw that Liv did have an electric guitar slung over her back, and she passed it to Susie. "Uh...thanks? I'm kinda helping Maya right now though?"

"That's why I brought it. When I feel like garbage, hearing Susanna sing makes me feel better." She could sing? I mean, I kinda half knew that, but it wasn't like I'd ever successfully dragged her ass to karaoke anywhere.

"Olivia, my singing doesn't have magic powers, you should know that. It doesn't cure—" She stopped mid-sentence and I kind of snorted at that. Fuck, her failing to say the word was always kinda funny. "...you know, stomachaches or anything."

"It's still nice. Maya, what's your favorite song?"

Fuck, Liv wanted me to fucking think right now? And what songs did I even know? I'd have to swallow the milkshake too. I managed it and didn't feel too much like shit, but it still felt kinda gross. "Ugh. *HNLK*. Shit, I du–*HULK* dunno, Liv.  *HURK*–guh. Fuckin'...gi–*HIRK* girls just wanna ha–*URK* have fun or so–*HMK* some shit like tha–*HULK*–at?" I was surprised when I heard Liv snickering, and I saw her smiling when I looked up. "Does Sus–*HEEK* even fucking kn–*HOULK* know that one?"

There was a smack, and when I looked over, Susie was rubbing her face with the hand she'd taken off my back. "Of course I fucking know that one," she sighed, then got up. Liv was less of a pussy about giving back and belly rubs than Susie was, so I was able to chill a little more. Susie didn't start singing right away though. Instead, she walked off into a little side room, then came out carrying a whole-ass keyboard and stand and shit and she set it up at the front of the room. "Gonna have to lower this shit a whole fucking octave. Fucking sopranos." I was wondering why she didn't just use her guitar or the actual piano that was literally right there when she suddenly dragged her hands up and down the keyboard, then started playing it super happy and fast before she burst into fucking song. "I come home in the mornin' light, my mother says, 'When you gonna live your life right?' Oh, mama dear, we're not the fortunate ones, and girls, they wanna have fun! Oh, girls just wanna have fun!"

My brain kind of didn't accept what the fuck I was seeing until she started singing again, and I burst the fuck out laughing. I couldn't stop cackling and Christ, that made me hiccup like crazy and everything was in fucking agony but Jesus. "St–*HIURK* stop, sto–*HOP!* Fuck!" She did stop, but it took me way too long to actually stop laughing. "Chr–*IULK* Christ, Sue, *HLK* don't ma–*UCK* make me fucki–*HNK*–gghhh!"

"Shit, right. Sorry."

"Don't apologize, you just did what she told you to." I gave Liv a thumbs up for saying it so I didn't have to.

"Guess I can play some other Cyndi Lauper."

I squinted down at my thighs before I looked up at her again. "Some wh–*HAUT*?"

Susie squinted back at me. "Cyndi Lauper. You know. The person who wrote the fucking song."

"...oh. *HNK*"

Somehow, even though she was still blushing like crazy, Susie looked absolutely fucking offended. "You don't—bitch, how the fuck do you not know who Cyndi Lauper is?"

"We don't all have the history of music from the 50s onward memorized," Liv saved my ass.

"It's fucking Cyndi Lauper! If anyone should know about her it's Maya! There's a fucking sex toy shop named after one of her songs!"

"Wha–*HAUK–at?!" I started laughing again. "Okay fu–*HUCK* fuck gir–*HIRK* girls just wann–*AULK* have fun, *HNLK* sing tha–*UCK* that shit!"

"NO!" Fuck, she was so fucking red, this was amazing.

"She actually probably shouldn't right now. If you laugh more you might die." Fuck, Liv was right. I groaned and my stomach and throat remembered to let me know I was a fucking dumbass.

Susie huffed and glared at me before actually walking over and picking up the guitar she'd left across her seat before moving back to the real piano and sitting on its bench. That was fair if I was honest. I'd probably fuck with her while she was trying to play it. After plunking the strings a bit, she nodded. "This'd definitely sound better on acoustic, but...fuck off, this one's mine."

"You're the only one being weird about it, Susanna."

"Fuck off more." Liv shrugged, and if these two wanted me to stop laughing, they should have stopped being so fuckin funny. After a moment, she actually stood up again and moved behind the keyboard, tapping something on it before pressing the keys. Instead of fake piano noises coming out, it made some fucking bongo sounds in a beat before she pulled her hand back to the guitar and started playing. Before I could figure out what the fuck that was about, though, she started singing too: "You with the sad heart, don't be discouraged, though I realize it's hard to take courage. In a world full of people you can lose sight of it all, and the darkness that's inside you makes you feel so small."

Before I even knew what the fuck was happening, I was just staring at Susie while she sang about true colors and loving people and support and...Jesus Christ, this fucking girl. This fucking girl. Liv was smiling. Even Liv was smiling. She only smiled when she was really fucking happy. Susie made her so fucking happy.

She made me so fucking happy too.

When she wound the song down I felt like the gayest girl in the fucking universe. "Your true colors, true colors...are beautiful like a rainbow." She pulled her hand away and played the drum noises with the keyboard again, then sighed and took her guitar off her shoulder, putting it down on the bench. "So. Any more requests?"

"G–*HOK* God, I love you."

Susie looked like a deer about to be murdered by a truck. "Uh—!" Her mouth opened and closed a bunch before she shook her head. "There are, um, a lot of songs with that title probably so you might need to—"

"You know that's not what she meant."

"...ah?"

Liv looked at me, and Susie was definitely staring at me. Shit. I hadn't really thought about it before I said it. But trying to back out of it was clearly fucking stupid with Liv right there, so I sighed and took another sip of my milkshake to buy a little time, then sat up a little straighter. "Yeah. *HNK* Liv's right. *HIK-ulk*. I meant I lo–*HUK* love you, Susie. *HMNK* And, uh, I lo–*ULK* love you too, Li–*HILK* Liv." Neither of them said anything, and boy was that not good for how my chest, throat, and stomach felt. I laughed a little, just to feel less tense. It didn't really work. "I've always kind—*AUK* kinda fell fast, you know? *HNK-lk* You don't go–*HOK* gotta say it back or *HNK* anything."

"Good!" Susie only seemed to realize what she said a split second after saying it, then shook her head. "Not, that, uh! I didn't mean—! I, uh—"

"And people say I have no tact." Liv took my chin and made me look at her instead of at Susie freaking out, and even though Liv didn't do eye contact, she did it right now. "What Susie means is that she's bad at saying that and probably won't for a while, but she really cares a lot about you. As for me..." She looked away and bit her thumbnail while she stared up at the ceiling. "Well, I'm definitely not in love with you. That's not gonna happen." I nodded. We'd established that one. "But I think that I do love you. And if I don't yet, if things keep going like they're going, I think I will." She smiled at me. It was one of her on-purpose smiles. She sucked so hard at that, but she only ever did it when she really wanted people to know she meant it.

...fuck, I was crying again.

"Hang on, don't hug me yet." I wasn't going to, but it made sense that Liv thought I was. And I really fucking wanted to. "Susanna, let me—thank you." Susie tossed Liv her hoodie and Liv sort of threw it over one shoulder, then pulled me into a hug herself, resting my chin on the hoodie. She held me and she rubbed my back, and she hummed in my ear. "I don't want to get your snot on me. But I do want to hug you. And I think you could use it." I sobbed and hiccuped like a fucking goober, but they both hurt way less now.

After a few seconds, I felt Susie wrap her arms around both of us, taller than us for once in her fucking life since she was standing and we were sitting. I imagined her towering over us and cackling and I couldn't stop myself from laughing again. That hurt less too though.

I laughed more at my own dumb thoughts a second later: Even if I did catch the hiccups for 69 years, it'd still be nice if I had these girls around me. Fuck, someday I'd tell Susie that joke and she'd throw the nearest fucking object at my head and it'd be so fucking funny.

Not now though. Now with those two holding me, shit was just perfect.

[ateez-himari]

Hiiii im sending you ask after ask sorry!!! But like your blog deserves so much more and since no one has claimed the title of hima's biggest fan I'll be the one to do the honors hehe😙😙

Now speaking of them meeting her parents from what I've heard and feel that yoongi's dad is like the more tsundre(?) version of him like I feel he's the type of dad that is mean (jokingly) to his sons but the biggest softie for his wife and daughter, and his mom is like that one cute mom that everyone in the friend group likes yk?the one that sends food to everyone when they want some😣

And since hima is the only girl in her family it's obvious how protective her brothers would be🥹especially her biological brother seeing as he took care of her since the tragedy that happened, he'd want to protect her from any harm and heartbreak

And I can imagine the members' faces after finding out her brothers are famous as hell, one of them is a member of the biggest boy group, and the other is the caption of the national team, I think mingi would almost pee his pants😭😭seeing not one but two of his seniors waiting for him to introduce himself formally as their sister's bf

Nowww for my question, kind of a request as well🤷

Now has hima ever been seen with her oldest brother(yoongi's older brother) and can we get some kind of drabble of mimi at his wedding(if no it's more than okay) I'm fine with headcanons or wtvr they're called🐱

Love you bb💓💓

Hi Mina!! Don't be sorry, it's always so nice to see you in my inbox 😘 You deserve a medal for being such a huge fan! Official President of the Hima Fanclub! ❤️

Ouu you're so right! He'd tell the boys to "man up and tie your own shoe laces" while actively doing it for his precious little girl despite her bring fully capable of doing it. Every time she comes back home her mom would be the type to go; "Aigooo our poor baby, did you get thinner ? I already made some food come sit down. Are you drinking properly ? What about sleeping ? Do you want more rice ?" (totally didn't use my Asian grandparents as an example for this 😭)

Hima is definitely treated like a princess by her brothers 🤭Hanzo loved her from the moment he saw her in the hospital and quite literally saved her life during the crash. Then Yoongi raised her after the adoption and has been extremely attentive to every little detail about her ever since. Poor Geum Jae is still trying to get the hang of it, with a whole decade between them it's almost like raising a child

Right ?! Imagine going to meet your little maknae's siblings thinking they're normal people then you see someone you watch during every soccer game, and the other one is the rapper of your hugely popular senior group 😭Yoongi isn't too impressive in stature (but one look from this man could definitely kill you) but Hanzo's left arm is literally covered in tattoo and this man is built like San (omg it's canon now they made a workout video together)

They're very rarely seen out in public by themselves since vacations are rare for idols and the brothers all want to make the most of what little time they have with her, but the few times fans spotted them he was still very clumsy when it came to interacting with his sister. The age gap between them is 12 years and since he wasn't around during the adoption - already living on his own - it was slightly harder for him to form a close bond with Hima so now he tries to take her on outings he thinks she'll like, for example cat cafes, shopping, cafe, the bookstore, etc. This is actually such a sweet drabble idea, I'll definitely keep it in mind!!

Love you too sweet!!🥰

[luvstrckcat]

Deception (Nines x Reader)

part I

Word Count: 3.7k

Summary: You've been on the lookout for a criminal that has been causing to be so restless. It's unbelievable on how it can kill so carefree and easily. But there has been a co-worker that has also been on your mind because of how cold and distant he is with everyone inside the department. He is so silent, but you feel like there is something that meets more than the eye... TW and other details: NSFW, Gore descriptions, dead bodies, tension (no smex)

AN: I've been delaying this one for soooo long but i finally have part I done so woohooo! (Also written in first POV) should I upload it in AO3 too?

The crime scene was perfect.

The lights of the police cars surrounded the shady alley where another of the victims lay. Surrounding me were three other colleagues. Civilians stood near the tape where it said ‘DO NOT CROSS’. They were all horrified to see how the poor victim was exposed and suffered a humiliating death. Several news reporters stood near the crime scene, giving an exaggerated summary of the victim in front of us all. 

The victim’s eyes were gouged out as he sat against the bricked wall. He wore raggedy clothes and had vomit stains on his lips that mixed with the blood. The blood slowly trickled down from the implanted smile along his cheeks and there were other deep slashed cuts along his wrists. Otherwise, his clothes weren’t touched, just his body. Many of the people nearby could not stand the sight but I’ve seen worse. 

Much worse than this. 

 More colleagues arrived as well, bringing the equipment to take in any evidence that could be used to find the culprit. But because of the famous signature on the victim’s cheeks, I knew exactly whose work this was. 

For the past few months, I’ve been working hard to catch this criminal for months. Does it have a name? Perhaps.

The victim here is not its first, but probably around its 20th victim. It tends to choose between homeless lying on the streets, depraved individuals, or civilians. Honestly, I can’t tell their true intentions but they don't deserve to be walking freely around the city when all it does is make a mess and butcher people. Meanwhile, I have to play the role of the janitor, cleaning up their mess.

“Any clues yet?” Daniel looks at me while he takes pictures with his camera, capturing every single detail of the victim's face. 

“Not yet” I shook my head as I held my notepad, examining the surroundings and interviewing possible witnesses. Most of the witnesses had their version of the scene to tell. They all live in the upper apartments of this shady area but from what I heard is that the victim was a homeless and a heroin addict who sold organs from children he would see in the park. 

How was that even possible? Who even knows at this point?

 One of the tenants in the shady apartments named Lou said that the homeless man used to own a corporate business but after it crashed down, his life turned upside down as well. I took his information so that we could meet up to gather more information that will  help me find the relationship between the victim and the murderer.

For now, this would do.

After roughly two hours, the crowd diminished, what was a crowded alley dwindled to a small crowd of police officers and the forensic crew. While they picked up the corpse to perform an autopsy while I let the reality of the situation sink in that this was just another night in Detroit where murders and crime is considered normal nowadays. While I jotted down some more notes about the surroundings of this place, I heard a whistle from behind and paused. 

Daniel stood next to me, a cheeky grin on his face despite how this was a bad moment to be looking so jolly. “Hey, say we eat at my mom’s restaurant tonight? My treat” He nudged me gently, “ I think it could be a good refresher from this place” 

I glanced back to the scene, hesitating. “It sound like a good plan, but i'm…not so sure”

“Let’s go” he encouraged softer, taking his hand in mine, “I think you really need this” I considered the situation, weighed the circumstances, and I made up my mind. I took a deep breath and nodded, “yeah, let’s go”

────── {⌘} ──────

The restaurant also served as Daniel’s home since it had two floors despite it looking small from the exterior. Detroit had its usual and unique architecture where buildings tended to be squished together and had at least two stories. The building in front of both of us wasn’t too complex compared to the other new and high-tech buildings which made the place a charming contrast. 

The inside of the restaurant was clean and organized in every aspect, and the decorations had a retro style. The cream leather seats on the sides of the wall, white tiles all brought a comfort that allowed me to forget the incident that happened earlier. It was a calm ambience inside while the Korean soap operas played in the background. It smelled like fried chicken, spicy pepper, soy sauce, tteokbokki and soju inside but that never really mattered when it was only two of us inside eating, excluding Ms. Song, who was in the kitchen making her kimbap late at night and preparing it ahead of time.As time passed by, the table we both sat in became a laughing corner as we chugged soju, betting to see who could drink the most. I had two bottles finished while Daniel had three done but that did nothing for him, his tolerance was far better than mine.

The time ticked 10:30 pm. Half an hour before the restaurant would close for the public but not for us two. By this time, I was already in a drunk state as I rested my head on his shoulder, both of our hands feeling around and being mischievous. 

“Come on, I can drink one more bottle I swear!” I whined, resting my head on his shoulder while he still chugged his fifth bottle. 

“Nope,” He shook his head and pecked my lips. “The last thing I want is for you to throw up all over my new shirt” 

“It’s not even that new, you’ve had that shirt for at least a year” I mumbled as I reached for the half-drunk bottle but he moved his bottle away from my reach. 

“Still new in my opinion” He chuckled and ruffled my hair before I protested. 

“It's not fair-” His index finger  shushed my lips as he heard a bell from the front door, his eyebrows raising in surprise. 

“What the hell is he doing here? How does he  know this place?” Daniel’s tone changed as he turned his head, looking at the new incomer and my curiosity piqued. 

“Who? Who is it?” I blurted out and he shushed me again with his index finger, glancing back and forth between me and the incomer. 

“At least be more quiet” He looked down at me, my hands all over his shirt and belt. 

I looked back to see the new customer and was taken aback. “Wait…he wasn’t even here at the crime scene of analysis…”  I mumbled to myself, my stomach felt uneasy now by the person who now arrived and multiple questions spawned in me. I peeped more out of the hidden booth we were both in to get a better look but all I could see was his back.. 

“Maybe it was his day off?” He suggested and looked back at me, seeing my drunken state and actions, now raising his eyebrow at me in confusion and with some intrigue. 

“Okay but even if he wasn’t, Nines should’ve still been there because he’s in my team,” I replied and stared at Nines as he sat across from where we were as he glanced at the menu. 

“I mean yeah, but maybe he had other stuff to do in the department?” He looked back again briefly before finishing his soju bottle. 

“Mmm yeah maybe” I slurred and burped before letting my palm rest on Daniel’s thigh and yawned. His eyes widened slightly  and he leaned close to my ear, his breath tickling my ear. 

“Let’s head to my room, yeah?” His voice lowered into a softer tone, sending tingles down my spine. 

I couldn’t help but giggle and lean close to gently nip  the side of his neck. “Only if you carry me upstairs” 

“Sure thing princess”' Daniel chuckled and scooped me up into his arms as he carried both of us upstairs while we giggled quietly to each other. Looking back to the diner room, Nines still  sat there with a blank stare while he drank  from a shot glass, never breaking away eye-contact with me. I looked away feeling intimidated with the stare he gave to me, fixed on how I was acting and who I was all over. I didn’t understand why he was here but I pushed aside the thought and went back to focusing on how now I wouldn’t sleep tonight once again. 

At Least for a good reason…

────── {⌘} ──────

“Rumor has it that the criminal could be an android,” Daniel whispered as I looked at some information from the victim and the results from the laboratory. 

“Remind me why you're whispering in my ear when it's noon?” I looked at him, observing him as he leaned on my desk and close to my face.  

“Because…there's ears everywhere” He hushed and looked around. The office was mainly empty, it was lunch time and everyone else was in either the cafeteria or out grabbing lunch.  

“Okay and? It's not like no one is going to hear us” I rolled my eyes and heard my stomach grumble. 

“Looks like someone’s hungry” He grinned and pulled out a large lunch box wrapped nicely in a patterned cloth. And then a large flask. 

I was taken aback by that and scooted over, eagerly pulling a chair from behind so he could sit with me. “You are prepared” 

“I know, I know. I'm so smart” He had a smug smile as he opened the lunch boxes and there it was, rolled-up eggs, sausages shaped like squids, rice, and some kimchi. Eagerly, I ate the food as he stared back at me, speechless before he smiled softly. “Okay well look at you go” 

Playfully, I shrugged him off as I dug in. I haven’t eaten any proper breakfast other than a cheap smoothie from the supermarket on my way here. Daniel only smiles and lets me eat while he once in a while grabs some bites from the food as well. “You never told me how you came to the conclusion that you think the perpetrator could be an android, for all we know, he could be one of us” I continued back with our topic and he just shrugged. “I'm not saying that it is one-hundred percent an android, but it's a possibility because usually, the criminal will leave some details, and usually, it is a human but in this case…it could either be an expert or android or deviant” He stood up, stretching his arms. “You want a drink from the vending machine?” “Sure, get me a soda” I look up at him and watch as he leaves to go get the drink. 

I still scarf down the food when someone catches my attention from my peripheral vision. My head turns to see the one and only, Nines. He’s just leaned against the wall, sipping a drink but his eyes seemed so fixated on me. I say nothing and stare back at him as well, I feel uneasy sometimes with his presence alone. I look away from him because I can't get myself to stare at him for a prolonged time. Can I enjoy my lunch in peace without him having to spawn whenever he pleases?I shook away again the same thoughts from a week ago– why do I always feel such uneasiness when he’s around? Is it his silence, the way he stares at me from a distance that makes my heart race? Was he naturally like this, or is he feigning? Maybe he is programmed to act this way– distant, so robotic that I can’t help but question if even has any emotions.

────── {⌘} ──────

It wasn’t long after  the case closed because there was not enough evidence to further investigate.

Synopsis: Carter Hofferman

Age: 54

Relationship status: Divorced

Cause of Death: Stab wounds, suspicion of heroin overdose

Extra: Used to be a wealthy CEO of a tech company, but it all crashed down due to bankruptcy. The victim was suspected of affiliation of organ trafficking in exchange for 10 kilos of heroin per month. No relatives

Still, even with the synopsis…there had to be more to the story. There had to be a reason why his eyes were plucked out and the tattoo of a figure in his right arm. It all had a meaning towards the aggressor.

After work, I headed to the same alleway where the whole incident took place. It was already dark out as I walked through the streets. I kept the hood of my sweater on as I passed through. As usual, there are homeless with their tents out on the edge of the streets. It's usual that they’re huddled in groups, surrounding the fire they made from scraps. Others openly stick needles in themselves, drugging themselves because their life is shitty enough. And when the drugs hit, that’s when they begin to talk to themselves, yell or fight with other people like them. Nothing in Detroit is surprising. Just about anything can happen in these streets, but it’s not like the city deputies care enough to change all of that. The more I walk to the crime scene, a strong rotten smell reeks in the corridor. Not to mention that this place already reeks with alcohol, drugs and urine, the rotten smell makes everything much more grim.

The tape that once stuck to the crime scene was now ripped and on the floor into shreds. The only difference of the place is that it looks more tiddier when the forensic team arrived to gather evidence. I knew there had to be more evidence around here that could be used to find the aggressor and to end this manhunt that I started. Before anything, I slip on the black latex gloves for precaution. 

I look around my surroundings first, still seeing the dry blood in the wall from where the victim was found. While I looked and searched around,  a small box behind the dumpster caught my attention. The rancid smell lingers here and I know I should be leaving. Doing all this could be considered tampering with evidence (that hasn’t even been found).  

There is more clutter hidden behind the dumpster, a black plastic bag in particular. I first glance to see if anyone is watching me before I open the small box. I’ll open the other bag after this. To my surprise, it's a pair of eyeballs that have been plucked out, the pupils are already turning opaque but that alone makes my stomach churn with the need to vomit. I shut the box, set it aside, and glance at the bag. 

There is a fifty-fifty chance that If I open it, inside could be garbage from a nearby tenant or something worse. I know the answer won't be the first option. 

My heartbeat only pumps out harder and harder, feeling more unsure of what I'm doing. Is it really worth it? Should I open the bag or not?  

My fingers tremble as they reach to undo the knot, the nauseous feeling only turning more urgent than ever. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, letting my fingers undo the knot. I open my eyes to see but all I see is darkness. Technically, this alleyway has no lights nearby so I take out the small flashlight from my pocket.  

I turn the flick of the flashlight and my skin feels cold and I'm getting goosebumps now seeing what is inside. It’s a horrific discovery that I have made. Should’ve left the alleyways, dumbass. 

Inside is a deceased child, amputated in many parts of his body. Even his teeth are missing, but I worry more about his bruised face. Many parts of this child are gone. He can’t be more than ten years old. The more I stare at this body, the more realizations I make. 

He has no organs in him, just flesh and bones. There’s already maggots forming in his body and flies settling in his poor flesh to feed off him. His blonde hair is dirty with blood, dust and who knows what else.  I can’t stare any longer and I turn to throw up on the side. The vomit doesn’t stop and neither does my thoughts. How can someone be so cruel to kill a child because of their desperation for drugs? 

Why a child? How can someone be so selfish to not consider how this must’ve devastated his parents, to know that their child died in exchange for someone’s addiction?    

It’s all a disgusting discovery to make and I see a crumpled up picture. I grab it and see the portrait of the child inside this bag. This was the same boy who had his picture plastered ‘missing’ on street poles weeks ago. 

Surely enough is the picture of the young boy before his life was exchanged for kilos of coke. The small portrait shows the boy's smile at the park. He lived a good childhood and it’s a shame he died so young. 

For minutes I stare at the picture and at the corpse in the bag. I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that it’s the same person yet in different states. 

Just as I was about to leave the place and go bother Daniel, I heard faint footsteps, they were soft but clear enough to indicate that I had company now. The flickering lamp from the corner of the building set an eerie environment and I did what any person with logic would do. 

Hide.

I hide behind the dumpster despite its reeking smell because it camouflages well with the clothes I’m wearing. I hold still as the footsteps become more clear in each step. It’s a bad idea to look at who it could be. 

It could be anyone. It could be a civilian, homeless, tenant or if I’m lucky enough… the culprit. But how would I be able to find out? I can’t crouch to see because I would then move the dumpster. 

But I have my phone, I can use my camera.

I discreetly pulled my camera out from my pocket and hit the record picture from the side of the dumpster. From the camera, it was evident that the culprit wore all black clothing, even the gloves were black. I couldn’t see any of his face practically so that was a bummer. What stood out from all this was the mask it had on. It was an anonymous mask, like the ones you saw hackers and bad guys wear in horror movies. The person walked so calmly towards the dumpster, as if he was taking a daily walk against the park. The only difference was that there was in fact no park but instead a dark alley. A nasty alley that had no sign of please in the human eye. Its hands remained in its sweater as it walked. They were calm, slow steps. There was no other sound other than the heavy footsteps that got closer to the bag that I had just touched not too long ago. A part of me hoped to not be caught recording this person. I didn’t know what this person was capable of and for all I knew, I could end up inside that bag of rotting flesh if I even made a small slip out.

I remained silent ,letting my heartbeat the only loud thing from me. The figure stopped walking in front of the bag that was dangerously close to where I was. I remained still, my heart pumping intensely, squeezing and hoping to not be seen.

The figure looked very tall and lean as it looked down at the opened bag now. Its head tilted slowly at the bag. Please don’t get closer and glance this way. I prayed silently. I could feel that my heart could just burst at any point, I felt the sweat forming in my head while I was trying to move in more in the dark corner of the dumpster. It started to crouch to the bag, pulling one of his hands from its pocket. My hand started to tremble, the camera shaking intensely as the figure crouched down more. Please don’t look this way.

The sweat in my forehead began to drip down my cheek while I did all to not be found. The video started to get more and more blurry because I couldn't stop trembling. Move. MOVE. Why aren’t you moving?

My legs felt heavy, as if they were rooted down to the gravel. The figure’s hand reached to check the bag when a flash appeared. He froze. My finger clicked the flash and took a picture of him. I didn’t mean to fuck up this badly. The camera still recorded, and the figure’s head slowly turned to where I was. It began crawling to the hidden corner I was in. I looked like a mouse caught by the cat, all shaken up and frozen. What are you doing? Why aren’t you running?I couldn’t move.

My heart pounded and pounded out and I was in a trance. My body wouldn’t move, and the figure kept crawling closer to me. How could it even see through that stupid mask? Finally, my instincts kicked but it was too late. The figure leaped at me and pinned me down. My phone fell out of my hand, and I tried to push off, but the figure had me pinned under its grip. Here I was, ready to be part of the rotting corpse in the bag. The figure’s heavy breathing echoed through the mask, a sound that I never thought would make me get shivers down my spine. I wouldn’t even be able to say goodbye to all my loved ones. My family, my closest friends, my fiancé. My life would be over in any moment, and I could only start to feel my eyes tear up. How was I so stupid enough to fuck up a simple task?

[pencopanko]

Do We Have a Deal? (A Coco Backstage AU Fanfic)

In which renowned actor, Héctor Rivera trolled a paparazzo by stealing his camera. Inspired by a series of photos of Keanu Reeves running away with a paparazzo's camera.

Author's Note: This was originally written some time in 2018-2019, but I was only able to finish it earlier today (GMT+7). This fanfic is set in an AU referred to as "Backstage AU" or "Actor AU" originally created by imjuanita, in which the characters in Coco are all in-universe actors. Unfortunately, I don't know how to contact her as her tumblr account has been hacked after inactivity so if you know where she is please let me know. However, if you are imjuanita and you are reading this I want to thank you personally for creating such a fun AU. I had a lot of fun exchanging ideas with you!

AO3 link here.

Héctor Rivera is usually the type of person who is willing to talk to you no matter who you are, even though he is arguably one of the hottest Latino actors in the industry. Even after his role in "Coco" as a murdered musician who happens to share his name and so much of his mannerisms that it made him even more famous, he is still willing to send a smile to his fans.

But the paparazzi? Well, that's another thing altogether. He dislikes how pervasive they are towards him, his coworkers (especially Miguel, the kid deserves a normal childhood, after all), and most of all his wife, Imelda. Unlike Ernesto who loves the attention as long as no boundaries are trespassed and deals with paparazzi in a way that is more cooperative, Héctor.... has his own ways. 

Like that one time Héctor Rivera stole a camera.

"WHAT THEーHE TOOK MY CAMERA!!"

According to bystanders, Héctor was seen running from the chasing paparazzi with a bag of groceries in his right hand and a video camera on his left shoulder, presumably taken from a snooping cameraman. He was trying to get the groceries as requested by his now five-months pregnant wife, the ever-talented Imelda Rivera, when he spotted a cameraman trying to get a shot of him. Having no time for his shenanigans and interviews for that day, he quickly grabbed the camera from the cameraman's hands and ran with it.

The stout cameraman who owned the camera was barely keeping up. Héctor's long legs only made it harder for him to catch up to him. It wasn't until he saw the lanky actor took a right turn into what looked like a dead end. Huh, he's not very smart now is he, he thought to himself as he walked cautiously into the . He realized too late that Héctor Rivera is a man of surprises as he felt a hand grab him by his shoulders. The next thing he knew, he became face to face with Héctor in a small space between two buildings.

"You're new to this job, aren't you?" asked Héctor. "They're usually good at sneaking around and all that, you were out in broad daylight, amigo."

The cameraman noticed the camera placed right on top of a closed (thank goodness) garbage can. Looking back at the taller man in front of him, he noticed that his eyes are twinkling with mischief. His grin adorned with a single golden tooth just added to the whole mischievous but definitely threatening aura. He could feel his initial confidence shrink with every breath he exhaled.

"I-I'm very sorry, Sir, I was just doiー"

"Sí, sí, I know. You were just doing your job."

"It's just thatー", the cameraman continued, "you and your wife are so private, a-and people are hungry forー"

"Ah, ah, ah. None of that", Héctor retorted. "I understand that your job is on the line, but your company and you should have known better than to go after me. You're lucky that it wasn't my wife you ran into, or else she would had made sure your face meets her shoe!", he chuckled.

The cameraman could only let out an awkward chuckle in return, but while he might not had been raised in any South American countries he had heard of the power of La Chancla. To think that someone like Imelda Rivera would hit someone with her shoes felt off... but surprisingly in-character? He shuddered at the image of her piercing eyes with a shoe on hand, ready to aim it at anyone in her path.

He jumped out of his thoughts as he heard Héctor speak again. "Alright," he said, as he picked up the camera, took off the cover, and started to record a little video. "I'll let you off with a warning this time. I'll give you this clip, but promise me that you will not disturb me or my wife again. ¿Claro? Do we have a deal?"

The cameraman looked up and he saw that Héctor was indeed recording. He had the camera face the both of them, as if taking a selfie. He had his free hand up with a peace sign, all grinning, talking to the camera as if talking to the masses to leave him, his wife, his fellow cast members ESPECIALLY little Miguel alone. He couldn't help but notice the grocery bag hanging down from Héctor's arm that was holding the peace sign.

Héctor looked at him. The cameraman swore that Héctor was really glaring at him, as he cheerfully asked "Do we have a deal?" at him. He could only let out a quiet "yes" and a nod. The taller man hummed in satisfaction, as he turned off the camera and gave it back to its owner.

"Now, be careful out there and don't let me see you again, okay? ¡Adios!", exclaimed Héctor before walking out of the dark alley. The cameraman could only look at Héctor with his mouth ajar, wondering what just happened.

-----

Weeks later, that clip of Héctor Rivera went viral. Miguel and Ernesto found it hilarious and thought that the stupefied cameraman added a nice touch to the chaos, while Héctor was getting lectures after lectures from Imelda on taking other people's things. Though she did appreciate the praises he sang for her on that video, and for that Héctor deserved a kiss.

Oh, and the cameraman? He got paid handsomely, but quit after three months. I heard that he decided to continue his family business with that money.