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squidthusiast · 5 months ago

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Ok, but why do I imagine Eight being the unofficial child of Pearl x Marina?

Because I imagine Eight was minding their business and all of a sudden, Pearl would slam the paper down and said “You’re adopted now”

Basically OTH at the start of their world tour haha, I love that they took Eight with them.

I have more detailed thoughts under the cut for those interested in my ramblings, analysis and interpretations of the characters.

Disclaimer: This is my own take on it, don’t let it ruin your fun!

I personally don’t really subscribe to the fandom’s ‘pearlina moms’ headcanon.

On the one hand, I am an absolute sucker for the ‘found family’ trope, and I definitely think Agent 8 and OTH fit in it!

On the other hand, I think people immediately put Pearl and Marina into the ‘parenthood’ box, a little too eagerly. Not saying this specific ask is that, btw, it just reminded me of some instances i’ve seen.

I personally think that the relationship between OTH and Agent 8 is a little more nuanced & sibling-esque, for the following reasons:

1. Within canon, we often see 8 being referred to as a friend by both Pearl and Marina.

Pearl does it more explicitly (see that one interview at her house), whereas with Marina it’s more insinuated (ex. In the Side Order dev diaries, she starts calling Agent 8 as ‘Eight’, which is stated to be a name used by their friends).

Pearl seems to be an accidental-duck-parent of sorts who haphazardly collects octoling teenagers & young musical talent. It goes in line with her whole mentor-esque leader personality, and i’m sure these disoriented teens find relief in an idol who seemingly knows what she’s doing (she really doesn’t).

However she doesn’t act in a parental manner. More-so like your estranged gay cousin who hit it big in another country and is down to show your queer little butt the ropes.

Marina on the other hand seems to have a more empathetic approach with Agent 8 (opposite to Pearl’s brashness). Marina clearly connects with Agent 8 through their shared experience as defected octoling soldiers, and probably sees her younger self in them. She’s already caring as it is, but this is accentuated during octo expansion given the circumstances.

I feel however that, unlike Pearl, Marina has a bit of a harder time actually forming a bond with Eight at the beginning. Their similarities (seemingly) end at their shared experience, and probably leaves Marina awkwardly wondering how to approach them further. What we can assume though is that they become closer friends during OTH’s world tour, given the events described in the Memverse Dev Diaries.

Meeting Eight during difficult circumstances (OE) and helping them get out creates a sense of camaraderie between them, which probably devolves into genuine care, established friendship and a strong bond amongst the three overtime.

2. Pearl and Marina are very career-centric both in Splat 2 and 3.

It is reasonable that the two young idols, who see their fame and musical recognition rise spectacularly & fast, are not particularly interested in settling down at this point in their lives.

Now entering her late 20s, Pearl is most definitely still interested in keeping the ball rolling with Off the Hook’s international success. Her character often points towards restlessness, freedom and discovery. There has definitely been character development in regards to her maturity in Splatoon 3, but these aforementioned traits are still ever present in her demeanour & decision-making.

Marina on the other hand can be seen slowly blossoming from a supporting character to being her own person. She definitely develops more self-confidence by Splatoon 3, but is still naturally bashful. It’s clear that she is allowing herself to explore & open up to new things for her own sake. She remains a caring and somewhat nurturing individual, but she is at a stage where she’s learning to live for herself and not for others.

Parenthood (and all the responsibilities and sacrifices it entails) at this moment of their lives would probably freak Pearl out, and stunt Marina’s personal growth.

3. The age gaps between OTH and Agent 8 are too close for it to create a parent/kid bond.

This makes their relationship a little hazy in regards to roles; 8 is still young enough that they may seek out rolemodels and mentors (still relatively influenceable), but they’re also nearing their 20s. By this point they are fairly self sufficient, have a sense of their personal values & identity, and they are relatively responsible & mature.

Pearl and Marina are 8’s seniors by approximately 4-6 years. However, in Splatoon 2 they’re entering their early 20s and their career has just begun to take off.

They are both still relatively youngsters, albeit older & more mature(? glancing at Pearl) youngsters than 8. This places them in a position where they can guide 8 and offer certain support and resources, but lack the maturity and experience of a full-fledged adult. This would approximate their relationship closer to that of siblings in a family setting.

Pearl & Marina are also less likely to feel a duty towards Eight as an adult would with a child. Instead, the latter’s circumstances are more likely to incite feelings of rapport and compassion as a fellow young inkfish.

Now, with all of this said, I will acknowledge that friendship/found family is MUCH more nuanced than a strict binary.

From personal experience in my last years of college, I did find myself caring for my fellow freshmen as though they were my kids, in certain ways. Hell, I called them my kids.

I acted as a proud parent whenever some of them achieved something, attempted to pass down my knowledge to them, and was protective of them to a certain extent.

They also annoyed me sometimes, like younger people do haha. And i’m sure I annoyed them too!

So I wouldn’t put it past OTH to call Eight their kid and have this mentor/parent-esque rapport with them in certain circumstances.

This is all based both on canon & my own interpretations of it, but still closely aligned to what has been shown in-game.

So if you have a different interpretation of Agent 8 and OTH, that’s great! I love to see people’s personal headcanons. Ultimately, Agent 8 is meant to be somewhat of a blank slate for the players to mold, with some hinted-at personality traits of their own.

As long as you have fun with these characters, that’s all that matters. This is just my personal opinion on their relationship in-game.

If you read all of this, you deserve the biggest golden star for listening to my incessant yapping 🤲⭐️

Feel free to bother me about this or other opinions you may have in my inbox, just be kind please!

#squid asks #off the hook #marina ida #pearl houzuki #Agent 8 #splatoon 2 #splatoon 3 #side order #character analysis #headcanons #splatoon headcanon #splatoon fanart #long ramble #I hope this person doesn’t regret this ask *crying*#sometimes I take things too literally #splatoon #my art

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princesssarisa · 3 months ago

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As I've read different people's views on Little Women, I've realized that for different readers, it's a fundamentally different book.

When I see someone describe the "universal" experiences of identifying with Jo, wanting her to marry Laurie, and disliking Amy, I remember all the proof I've seen that these are far from universal. The latter two weren't even my experiences: identifying with Jo, yes, but shipping her with Laurie and disliking Amy, no!

Even people with equal amounts of knowledge of the historical context and of Louisa May Alcott's life seem to come away with vastly different feelings about the story and characters.

I suppose there are a wide variety of reasons for this. First and foremost, which of the four March sisters you personally admire or relate to the most. Then there are other factors like your gender, your age when you first read the book, your relationship (good or bad) with traditional femininity, whether you read Parts I and II as a single novel or as Little Women and Good Wives, your relationships with your own family members, your religion and ethical values...

The list goes on.

That post from @theevilanonblog that I reblogged recently about the different interpretations of Frankenstein makes me want to write out a similar list of ten different views I've read of Little Women. Here it is:

Little Women is about the March sisters learning to be proper virtuous women of their time and place. With Marmee as their role model (a role later shared by Beth as she becomes increasingly angelic in her illness), they learn to conquer their flaws, give up their wild ambitions, and settle down as good wives and mothers. This is especially true for Jo, whose character arc is a slow taming from a rough tomboy to a gentle nurturer. It's a conformist and anti-feminist message, which Alcott probably disliked, but she wrote it to cater to public tastes. (This reading seems mainly to come from critics who dislike the book.)

Little Women is about Jo's struggle to stay true to herself in a world that wants to change her. She struggles with whether to stay a tomboy or become a proper lady, whether or not to marry Laurie despite not loving him romantically, and as an author, whether to write what she wants, write what earns the most money, or give up her writing altogether. In the end, she changes only in ways that make her happy, e.g. by learning to control her temper, and later by embracing romantic love. But in more important ways, she stays true to herself: always remaining slightly rugged, clumsy and "masculine," finding success as a writer, and marrying Friedrich, a man just as plain and "unromantic" as herself, but whom she loves and who respects her as an equal.

Little Women is about learning to "live for others." That phrase is used often and could well be the arc words. Beth is the only March sister to whom a selfless life comes naturally, but the other three master it by the end of the story (as does Laurie). They learn to conquer their moments of pettiness and selfishness, to live in better harmony with each other and with their friends and love interests, and to give up their self-centered dreams of fame and wealth, building lives that focus on service instead.

Little Women is about growing up. The first half is mainly about the March girls' maturing by surviving hard times and learning to be better people, while the second half is about reaching adulthood and bittersweetly parting ways to start new lives. At the beginning, Jo is a girl who doesn't want to grow up: she wants to always be a wild young tomboy with her family (and Laurie) by her side forever. But of course, she can't stop time or womanhood, and is eventually forced to accept the loss of Meg, Amy, and Laurie to marriage and Beth to death. After grieving for a while, she lets go of her old life and willingly builds a new one with Friedrich.

Little Women is about family bonds and the fear of losing them. We meet and become attached to the wonderfully close, cozy March family, which gradually expands through friendships, marriage, and new babies. But throughout the story, the family is in danger of breaking apart, whether due to conflict (Jo and Amy's sibling rivalry, Meg and John's marital problems), or separation by distance (Father going away to war, Amy going to Europe, Jo to New York), or death (the danger of losing Father and Beth in Part I, and the ultimate loss of Beth in Part II). But in the end – unlike in reading #4 above – the family doesn't break apart and never will. Conflicts are resolved, travelers eventually come home, the surviving family members always live near each other and stay as close as ever, and even Beth isn't really gone, because her memory and influence live on.

Little Women is about femininity and each March sister's relationship with it. Meg and Amy happily conform in different ways: Meg to "domestic femininity" as a housewife, Amy to "ornamental femininity" as a society lady. Beth pressures herself to conform to self-effacing domestic femininity, until sadly, it kills her – either because she's too selfless and nurturing when she cares for the fever-infected Hummels, or because she has anorexia, as Lizzie Alcott might have had. But Jo strikes a successful balance in the end, conforming just enough to fit into society, but only on her own terms, and otherwise living a happily unconventional life as a writer and schoolmistress.

Little Women is about Jo's unlearning of internalized misogyny. At the beginning, she's a "Not Like Other Girls" tomboy, who wishes she were male, disdains feminine girls (especially her sister Amy), doesn't care enough when "her boy" Laurie behaves badly toward women, and is afraid to be vulnerable. But gradually, and without losing her strength of character, she learns to embrace the sweeter and more tender aspects of herself, sees that Amy's ladylike manners have practical benefits, and learns to say "no" to Laurie when he turns his childish, unhealthy romantic attentions to her. Then after Beth dies, she realizes how precious Beth's utterly domestic, feminine life was, and embraces a more domestic life herself. Yet by doing so, she becomes a true feminist, as she enters an egalitarian marriage and devotes her life to teaching boys to be good, respectful men.

Little Women is only what US Americans know as the first half. It's just about the March sisters getting by and learning moral lessons over the course of the year their father is away at war. Nobody gets married and nobody dies. Everything else is in Good Wives, which is a sequel with different character arcs and different themes, and which should be published separately, as it originally was and still is outside the US. Trying to tie them together into one narrative never feels quite right.

Little Women is Alcott's idealized version of her own life and family, where no one suffers quite as much as they did in real life, everyone is slightly less flawed, and Jo ends up happily married to a man very much like Alcott's lost love Henry David Thoreau. She wrote the life she wished she had.

Little Women is just a semi-autobiographical slice-of-life that Alcott wrote quickly for money.

Which is the truest to Alcott's intent? I don't know. But while some of these readings I like better than others – and some of them I despise – I'd say they're all understandable and reasonably valid. Some aren't even mutually exclusive, but can be used together... although of course, other readings are mutually exclusive, like whether the story is feminist or anti-feminist, or whether the March family ultimately breaks apart or holds together. And they're all worth using as springboards for discussion.

Alcott wrote more books than she ever realized she did, because Little Women can be many different books to different people.

@littlewomenpodcast, @joandfriedrich, @thatscarletflycatcher, @fictionadventurer, @fandomsarefamily1966

#little women #louisa may alcott #interpretations #literature

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oraclefreak · 6 months ago

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I think we, DPS fans, don't talk about Charlie during the school's tribute to Neil enough.

He's not singing.

Meeks, Pitts and Knox are singing, letting all their feelings out.

Cameron is singing a little calmer. You can see the sadness in him though.

Todd is stuttering words, not even singing—but he's trying.

Charlie does not sing.

I'm sorry for the picture's quality.

At first I thought he didn't sing because he was angry at Neil for leaving all of them; the Dead Poets, Keating and his dreams of becoming an actor. We saw at the beginning of the film how Charlie tried to convince Neil to speak up to his parents. I think he really wanted Neil to be happy, and he knew he wouldn't be if he stayed silent and pursued being a doctor because of his father.

During Neil and Mr. Keating's talk in the office, Neil mentioned Charlie: "We are not a rich family like Charlie's" (quoted by memory). Charlie tried to make Neil pursue acting when they had different social backgrounds; Charlie could go against his parents and not ruin everything. But Neil was an only child from a family that was mantained by his father and no one else... and not particularly wealthy either.

Even if they had those differences, they didn't separate them. And both of them were boys with dreams they couldn't follow easily. Charlie was more rebellious (especially when it came to school's authorities). Neil was more of the type to go with whatever people wanted. Charlie was more risk-taking. Neil's risk in the whole movie was participating in the play (yes, the club wasn't a Neil risk; it was all of the poets').

Charlie was really proud of Neil for finally following his dreams.

"He's good. He's really good."

Sounds familiar?

"I was good. I was really good."

This parallel makes sense to me, especially if we analyze the very first scene of Charlie and Neil in the movie. As I said, Charlie wanted Neil to speak up to his father. And when he did and it all broke apart; Neil said words Charlie had said about him during the play.

Obviously, Charlie disliked Neil's dad. We can be sure about that, definitely.

The school's tribute to Neil was either Mr. Perry's idea or he gave the permission to do it. The authorities thought of Neil's death as the institution's problem. Keating was suspicious from the beginning because of his unconventional teaching methods (plus Mr. Perry thought Keating told Neil to keep his place in the performance, which he did—but he made it look like it was a real problem... 1950s, let's go).

Charlie didn't think this event of singing words of grief and so on was for Neil. Neil didn't die to be missed. Neil died because he would miss out on what he wanted to do. But that reasoning didn't even come across the authorities' heads.

I think of Charlie as a person who has an internal philosophy, a reasoning that most people wouldn't think of. So, when every single one of his friends are singing because they miss Neil; Charlie does not sing because this is a way to pay respects to Mr. Perry for losing his son. A way to say the authorities are right. A way to say "Neil... poor boy." Neil was miserable because he wasn't free. And his only way to be free was... not living.

I believe this "Charlie wasn't singing" thing can be interpreted in many, many ways. I probably overanalyzed it because 6 years of DPS make someone go insane eventually. What I do think is clear is that Neil and Charlie's friendship was very obvious from the start. And yes, the not singing thing is something to observe and think about... but their whole friendship isn't very talked about in the fandom! And I had the idea to write about not only the movie's scenes that have both of them, but also how I perceive it (hence why I would describe this post as a theory rather than facts).

I would love to see other people's takes on this subject too !!

#dead poets society #dps #dps boys #dps fandom #charlie dalton #neil perry #grae's old interests<3 #grae blogging era

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cepheustarot · 7 months ago

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What awaits you in May?

Attention! This reading is for entertainment purposes only. This tarot reading does not give a 100% guarantee that all the described situations will occur or being ultimate truth. You build your own life and destiny and only you know yourself best.

✧ Masterlist ✧ Paid readings

Pick a pile. Choose one or more pictures. Trust your intuition.

Pile 1: At the beginning of the month, you may have an unforeseen situation, force majeure, which will change your plans, which were supposed to be implemented in may but because of this situation the implementation will either be postponed or you will change your decision and do it differently. As I see it, for the most part you planned these plans together with other people, your family or friends but someone could change their mind at the last moment and refuse to participate or a strong quarrel may arise with someone. Naturally, you will be nervous because of unforeseen circumstances, thoughts may arise "why not give it all up, give up this idea" but as the cards show, it is better not to abandon the implementation here but to look for an alternative, since in the end everything will turn out much better than you imagined!

Also, this month the chance to change jobs or occupation / try a new hobby will be quite high as you will receive a good offer from a company or employer with good working conditions and a good salary/ rate per hour. However, your current employers may stop you, because they are afraid of losing you, you are a valuable employee for them and this can create small problems when you are fired. Also, if you are in business, your sales will increase significantly this month, you can make profitable deals with someone, invest profitably in some business. If you are studying, then you will also succeed this month but it is important to make an effort here since you may have strict teachers who are very picky about the answers or you can write tests where one mistake can lead to the loss of many points, so be careful!

Also this month, there is a high chance to meet a new person who will later become a good friend for you or, if you are looking for a relationship, will become a good partner. As I see it, you will spend a lot of time with each other, you will get to know each other, create joint memories, in general, you will be very comfortable and good next to this person. If you are already in a relationship, then this month is a good opportunity to strengthen your bond or resolve problems between you, establish a relationship and get closer, spend time together. You can also spend a lot of time with your family this month, in particular with your siblings.

Pile 2: At the beginning of the month, your problem which lasted for a long time will be able to be solved, you will finally be able to find a way out of the situation and thanks to this you will feel so relieved, weight has finally fallen off your shoulders, you will have a slight feeling of freedom, you can feel so confident as if you won the most difficult competition and took the prize! It can be anything, getting rid of debts, solving psychological problems, solving financial problems, overcoming a crisis, resolving a conflict with people — in general, something that has been burdening you for a long time. You may also have felt depressed and tired lately, felt like your mood was sad most of the time, it might be difficult for you to enjoy some little things and your condition will improve significantly this month. Here, in general, the rough patch will end, luck and happiness will accompany you in your life!

I also see that this month you will have the opportunity to change something in your life that will help you feel better, here the emphasis is that you would like to get rid of the past, of the memories that burden you: you can change your appearance, your style,change of scenery and go somewhere for a while or move altogether, change your social circle, hobbies, change your job / occupation, change the interior of the apartment, you can add decor, you can discover new places in the city, find new people, you can also change inside yourself, change your views — anything can happen here that can improve your mood and well-being.

This month you will also make new plans, goals and work on their implementation, here I see that you will definitely succeed since this will be something very important to you, you will be burning with the idea and strive to achieve what you would like, probably this motivation came to you after improving your well-being and it's very cool! Here you can study something a lot, try to figure out a topic, consult with others, improve your skills, even if you start something new, you will be accompanied by success and luck!

Pile 3: This month you may feel tired from the oversaturation of events in your life, from an overabundance of emotions, from being with people often, and here I see you can feel how your social battery has "run out". You will distance yourself from people for a while, spend time alone or with only a small number of people but in any case you focus on yourself and taking care of yourself. You can take a vacation at work or take a break, spend time doing things that bring you pleasure that calm you down and do not strain you, you will pamper yourself here and do what you want. You can also get tired of the hustle and hustle and go to some quiet place for you, often visit your favorite places and “places of power" that fill you internally.

And although I said that you will spend most of your time alone with yourself, I also do not exclude that you will want to meet with your inner circle, your loved ones may also meet and offer to go on a trip to small towns, you can spend time outside the city but away from the hustle and bustle. And if you agree then this trip will also be able to fill you with internal resources, improve your well-being, you will feel how your fatigue gradually passes and your head is free of obsessive thoughts.

At the end of the month, a situation will occur that will take you out of your inner balance: it will be unexpected, you will be required to quickly resolve the situation or do something in the shortest possible time, make a choice and naturally this can infuriate you. This may be related to work, for example, your boss will require you to do something urgently, make changes to the work, it may also be related to the family, there will be a heated dispute between family members and you will have to take someone's side, since it is difficult to remain indifferent in this case. In any case, it won't last long, you will get a grip and quickly resolve the problems that have overtaken you so you shouldn't worry too much about it.

Thank you for reading! I will be glad of any feedback 🖤

#tarot #tarot cards #pick a card #pick a card reading #pick a pile #pick a pile reading #pac #pick a photo #pick a picture

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hughmanbean · 9 months ago

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The Moon Looks Back

As a child, Bruce liked to stargaze with his parents. It was something that connected them, and soothed him in a way hard to describe.

That hadn't changed, after the night in the alley, when he went soul searching, or even when he took up the cape. It certainly hadn't stopped after all these years, with all of his children beside him.

During his trek around the world, he regarded the moon as a sort of companion, ever-changing but consistent. It stuck with him, even just by existing.

He stargazes less often, of course, with everything he does nowadays. But he still takes time to look at the night sky, constellations and childhood friend still there.

Of course, he didn't know that it was actually alive. And he'd really of appreciated if he didn't have to learn that while stranded in space.

---

It was nice to just relax when things got a bit difficult. The moon was a nice little cove for Danny to just decompress and watch the world go by.

One such benefit was that he could see those who looked to him as the moon. The grandfather of a family, watching the sky as the kids go to sleep, the couple on a late night date, and the astronomers that study the stars.

Amongst them, one Bruce Wayne stood out. In the beginning, just the child of a wealthy family, though after the death of his parents he continued to look to Danny. Every once in a while, Danny would sense Bruce, in some drastically different location and situation.

Eventually, he seemed to settle back down in Gotham. Though not without a few new habits, so to speak.

Now, this was an opportunity to finally talk face to face. After all, it wasn't everyday he got the chance to speak to such an interesting stargazer in person.

#dpxdc #dc x dp #dp x dc #dp x dc prompt #dp x dc crossover #Possible #spirit halloween #spirit halloween ship #Or maybe just platonic #Danny is the moon #That's it #He can separate whenever he wants it's like a vacation spot for him.#I hate how my writing cannot capture emotion #It's so blasted dull #dcxdp

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bookskeepers · 4 months ago

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imagine you're just walking down the street, hand enclosed in tsukishima kei's, and you're both in college but it's summer break so you're visiting him and his family in miyagi.

none of the other karasuno vbc boys attend the university that you and tsukki do, but yamaguchi knows you exist and has met you before. of course he does, he and tsukki are best friends.

anyways, you've heard about how tsukki was in high school, both from yams and tsukki himself. aloof, cold, borderline mean -- he still acts that way towards others, but rarely towards you (unless you're bantering, of course (which is frequently)). he's seldom mean to you both on purpose, slightly less so accidentally.

so when you hear someone call, "tsukishima!" from behind you, and he slips his hand out of yours as if it's instinctual, you think this might be another one of those times where he's being mean by accident. you watch as he whips around, eyes alight with an emotion you can't quite identify, face pink from a blush as if he was caught during some scandalous act.

you turn around at a slower pace, trailing your eyes from his golden optics to where he's looking at -- a short, bright-haired ginger boy and a taller, darker-haired guy. they're holding hands, and you feel a pang of jealousy -- tsukishima's friends are comfortable to show their relationship in front of him, but he doesn't feel the same to show you off to them.

"hey shrimpy," you hear him say, his low tone tinged with that mean edge you've come to recognize. "see you haven't grown any taller since i left."

you don't pick up on 'shrimpy's' response, nor do you hear any other part of the conversation. your heartbeat's too loud and all you can hear is the blood rushing in your ears, feeling the familiar prickles of jealousy and anger begin to invade your system. the conversation is brief, however; the dark-haired man glares at tsukishima before rolling his eyes and tugging the ginger away. when they're no longer in sight, tsukishima seems to realize he's no longer holding your hand.

he reaches for it again, apologies written in his eyes as he intwines his fingers with yours once more. "sorry," he says after a bit of uncomfortable, tense silence. "seeing those two triggers my fight or flight response."

you're not used to hearing him say 'sorry,' so it catches you off-guard when you do. you glance at him, holding eye-contact. "so it's not because you're ashamed to be with me?"

"what?" he seems genuinely appalled. "no, of course not." he uses his grip between your fingers to pull you closer and plant a kiss on your forehead. "didn't you hear what i said?"

you shake your head. he gives you a soft smile, one that you know's reserved just for you. "well, they asked me who you were and i said you're my lovely partner."

a blush makes its way up your cheeks, and you try to focus on the conversation that just happened -- if you strain your mind, you realize that tsukki did, in fact, introduce you as his partner. and the ginger's response comes to the forefront of your brain, as well. "did you agree to go on a double date with them?"

"yeah, i did," tsukki responds. he presses another kiss to your face, this time planting his lips on your own. soft, sweet, chaste -- none of which were adjectives anyone would use to describe your tall, blonde partner. "it's about time i show you off to my friends, right?"

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smuttyaf · 9 months ago

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The Camster Couple

𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰; 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐚 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰.

wc: 5k

spanking, choking, degradation and rough sex.

It all started on the blue app with the lowercase ‘t’ in the middle. Posting seductive selfies to revealing videos, you built quite the following from these appearances.

Admirers began requesting specific posts to ache their thirst. First it was particular lingerie sets, then prolonged videos touching yourself, soon it escalated into you role playing for the naughty viewers. Reciting everything the strangers would describe on how they’d like to use and abuse you.

But even after fulfilling all those demands, still came the bombarding questions of wanting more.

The requests to become a cam girl started to pour in. The constant debate down your feed about which website you should join. Maybe Chaturbate or Cherry.tv? No… Those weren’t good enough, but you still had time to ponder the idea.

Doing live shows had its advantages and drawbacks. For one, you’re getting paid to touch yourself, your revealing photos and videos will finally have a price on them. But, that doesn’t overshadow the dispute that your face could possibly be shown for everyone to see. You were fearful that maybe co-workers, friends, or even family might find out. However, the conflicting contrast that made you excited was the option to receive gifts. Followers had the ability of viewing your wishlist on certain cam-sites. It gave them the option to go beyond just tipping the model, but appreciating her even more… honestly that feature alone made you like the idea of doing it. But, the one major obstacle that really hinders your decision is your boyfriend; the one who doesn’t know about your second life.

That’s why you find yourself here right now, lounging together in your bedroom with your teeth grinding in your ear. Your eyes flick towards him when running your finger on the notepad; clicking on the search bar, you immediately type in the link to your blog. The familiar desktop background appears making you scroll through a few post till you turn your laptop towards Harry.

“Look at this.” His attention turns towards you placing it on his thighs.

You gaze at him while his fingers press down on the arrow key to move the screen further. “What do you think?” You ask. Warmth spreading throughout your cheeks as you let your hand rest along your stomach fiddling nervously with your tank top.

“I think you want me in trouble,” Harry smirks. He goes to pass the laptop back however you halt his movements.

With nervous smile adorning your lips, his expression transitions into one of confusing eyes, questioning your behaviour.

“I think you need to look closer.” You insist, finger dragging down the notepad. He scoffs, sight trailing back to the pictures on the fuzzy screen.

Harry doesn’t even listen at first, letting himself look over your unopened tabs that range from PrettyLittleThing to Xvideos. The glimpse of porn sites didn’t faze him, what does are the tabs that read “Most profitable webcams sites?” and “Best webcam site survey.” Bushy brows lock together, his attention going back to the revealing pictures of… hold on, that looks like your lingerie set… and that beauty mark right there belongs too.

His head snaps, mouth opening slightly with chest beginning to rise with nerves. He wants to be upset, wants to shut the laptop and demand answers but the growing bulge in his pants directs him otherwise, because as much as he should be angry right now that his girlfriend of eight months was taking provocative pictures of herself to upload on the internet, he was aroused.

“Since when?” Harry mutters, swallowing hesitantly. His gaze going between you and the picture of your chest displayed on the screen.

The look on his face is giving you anxiety. Heart pounding in its cage. You’re back to biting down on your bottom lip, diverting your attention to the highlighted keys.

“It’s been two years…” You mumble, finding the bottom of your laptop more interesting in this moment.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

You shrug your shoulders. You didn’t have a reason, you never thought your pictures would blow up and gain so much traction And you never thought you would get bombarding comments about wanting to see more of yourself. You groan, taking your finger away from the machine and running them through your hair, dramatically slouching your body into the bed frame.

“If you want to break up with me I totally understand.” You say, words muffled from your face burying into your crewneck. That makes a hearty laugh leave the brunette, the feeling of his hands gliding up your thigh stirs your head to peek up.

“Baby relax,” He reassures. Blinking at him you nestle deeper into his touch, shifting your body into him as the redness in your face begins to subside.

“You’re not mad?” You question, fiddling with your bottom lip. The thundering in your ear quiets down as you don’t see the angry face of your boyfriend appear. He lets out another light laugh, shaking his head and looking at you in a way that makes you sigh with utter relief.

“I —I’m definitely surprised… and a little upset… I mean you’re my girlfriend and you’ve been posting these but…” He looks between you and the laptop, his lips squeezing into his cheeks before breaking out into a sneaky grin. “You’re so sexy baby, I really can’t be mad.” He reveals, finger pinching your thigh.

The answer causes you to lean forward, arms linking around his shoulders as you press heartfelt kisses across his cheeks.

“I’m so sorry! I know, I know, I should’ve told you but… I was too scared and I’ve been doing this before I met you and… I just didn’t know what you would say,” You rant between kisses, his lips curling into amusement. The warmth of his hands run over your spine comforting you.

“Baby. Relax.” Harry replies, the tone of his voice settling your excited nerves. You quiet down, placing one last kiss on his cheek before looking up at him with shy eyes. “I’m not mad, just wish you told me earlier.” You nod at him pleasantly with smile set on your features.

Your breath draws in slowly with the quiet hum of the laptop sounding in the space. And just like before when you were nervous telling him about your promiscuous account online, you’re back to the bubbling feeling having to tell him the new escapade on your schedule. Clearing your throat, you raise up, licking over your bottom lip and locking your gaze with his.

“I do have one more thing though…”

Harry shakes his head playfully, smirk tugging along his features as he rubs your covered flesh in his palms.

“You want to be a cam girl?” He interjects. Stomach quivers with eyes fluttering in shock, you question were exactly he even got that idea or was it obvious. “It’s in your tabs babe.” Harry continues. Your cheeks go back to burning in embarrassment as you nod your head.

“Yes I want to do that but also…” His brows rise, surprised there is more to the story. “I want to do it with you.”

His features soon resemble yours with burning skin and body shifting under your weight. To your amazement he leans in, lips pressing against yours in a teasing kiss. The racing in your heart relaxes. You really had the best boyfriend in the world.

With the fondness of his lips against yours you pull away, cheerful smile shining as you hum with happiness.

“So… yes?”

Plaid pink skirt with embroidered bralette reflects across the screen as comments fill the message board.

You giggle at the viewers appreciating your half naked appearance. Thanking the many who are tuning in for your first show.

The sound of the sink cutting off in your adjoined bathroom rings through the space, it only makes you smirk at the events about to happen.

“I did say I have a surprise for my opening night.” Black letters roll in questioning the news. “I thought I would do it with a special someone.”

Harry’s footsteps sound through the room when he moves his way towards the bed. His hands going to your calves hanging off the frame and playfully tugging you down. It causes a smile to spread on your lips as you kick him away.

“Let’s start shall we.”

You adjust the frame of your laptop so it can hide Harry’s face as he slips in behind you. His fingers gracefully falling on your hip as you adjust to make space for him on the bed.

“I think they’re jealous.” Harry says, head leaning in to look at the comments reacting to him.

You watch his expression change as his eyes rake over the messages; jaw clenching with lips pressed tight together. You can tell he wasn’t pleased with whatever people were saying.

“I have to agree I’m mad too,” He responds to someone. Your face twists in confusion. “She’s been a bad little girl, hasn’t she?” His hand on your hip massages your skin roughly as you register his words.

“Not only deceiving you all, but me as well. So naughty not telling her boyfriend about what she does online.”

Biting down on your bottom lip you turn towards the screen with glint of happiness in your eyes. You know what mood Harry is in.

“She deserves a punishment, doesn’t she?” The hand on your hip leisurely glides into your scalp and grips it in his palm. Your head jerks back while his gaze is still caught on the computer; not even paying attention to what he’s doing.

“I think they’re starting to like me now.” Harry smirks, his other hand going to your breast and gripping it roughly.

The devious tone in his voice makes you whimper, eyes peering up at the ceiling as you let him grope your skin. Fingers transition from kneading it in his palms to twisting your nipples through the thin material.

“Yes, she’s been a very bad girl.” His digits pull away to slap your breast making you cry out. The sound you elect causing him to pull your head back once again, his body shifting from behind to gaze over your expression.

“Such a liar.” He says, eyes peering down as you look at him with pleasure written all over your face.

“You like being a liar, don’t you.” His hand meeting your skin again to pierce another smack against your tits. “Speak!” He orders, adding another blow.

“Yes sir.” You mutter, looking into his forest eyes and biting down on your bottom lip as he places one final slap to your skin.

“Tell me what you are.” Harry says, jerking your head, it makes you flutter your lashes up at him.

You’re too caught up between his freshly washed hair falling over his forehead and chest displaying his tattoos, that you don’t recall him demanding you to answer him again. His biceps flex when he lands another blow against your skin to knock you out of your daze.

“I’m a bad girl.” You tremble. His lips turn into a devilish grin. Hands roaming over your reddening skin.

“Mhm…” Harry hums with eyes searching your overwhelming appearance. “Across my legs.”

He relaxes his hold on your hair, letting you rise up on the bed to comfortably lay across his thighs. Your backside perched itself in the air. The ends of your skirt revealing your bare heat as his hand that once laid marks across your skin rubs against the material of your clothing.

“They’re calling you a dumb slut,” His hands go under your skirt to feel over your ass roughly. “I think I agree.” He smacks the flesh making you chew down on your bottom lip.

“Do you think you’re a dumb slut?” Harry taunts with another mark against your ass.

The atmosphere is influenced with pure lust from each swift, assertive motion of his palm lying roughly into your skin. Harry’s not even waiting for you to answer, he’s just placing blow after blow amongst your cheeks in pure arousal. The sheets underneath his hold ruffles against your body with each thrust.

You bite down harder into your bottom lip, fingers curling into the duvet as your eyes roll in hunger at the furious slaps causing hues of red blossoming under your skin.

“Dumb slut doesn’t know how to answer,” Harry cracks another heavy smack against your ass. High pitch whimper breaks through your lips when you jump at the action.

“Baby,” You cry but that only beckons another sharp slap.

“What’s my name?”

“S —Sir. I’m sorry sir.” You apologize for the mistake as his thundering smacks blaze across your skin.

“Dumb little fuck toy,” One hand leaves your cheeks and trails back into your hair. He’s tugging the strands so you can turn towards the laptop completely.

Catching sight of yourself in the camera your face is blazed red, lips bitten with tears brimming your eyes from the pain and pleasure coursing through your veins. The viewers are seeing you at your most vulnerable. Being taunted with bruises and degrading words, just for you to apologize to the one haunting your skin with waves of pain.

“Say it, say “I’m a dumb little fuck toy”,” Harry gloats. You can see in the view of the laptop his smirk as it’s the only feature that reveals his face. The palm of his hand makes another moan slip out of your mouth as it welcomes itself against your flesh.

He loves watching you wither and moan. He loves seeing your skin flourish with hues of pink from his finger prints leaving their marks, knowing that they will be there for days. He loves that with each smack of his hand you were getting off to it. He loves that if he were to move his position even lower he’ll feel your wet pussy ready for anything he has in store.

“I’m a dumb little fuck toy sir.” You whine, voice muffled from your face press into the sheets.

“Mhm…” Harry hums again, another painful slap burning your skin. “My dumb little fuck toy.” Smoothing his hand over your scorching flesh.

His grip on your hair jerks your head back, painful cry leaving your mouth as the straining sensation in your scalp makes your arms bend to pick your body off his thighs. He draws your head back even further, your legs flexing to move your position to now face him. The hand leaving heavy slaps against your ass sends one roughly across your face.

His jaw is still tense with eyes dilated in dominance. Your legs are now completely aching for his touch to spread over your pussy, just craving attention.

“Don’t you love being my fuck toy?”

You moan at the words, blinking up at him and nodding your head. “Yes sir.” You whimper, sucking on your bottom lip as he looks over your disheveled appearance.

Harry taps your face gently, lips flattening together as the hold he has on your hair pressures your face to meet his. Your tongues immediately exchange fluid as they dance against each other in passionate harmony, the feeling of his muscle running against yours has you moaning into the kiss.

The rough exchange of spit oozes between lips as you push yourself deeper into his embrace. His fingers curling into your hair welcoming your adventurous tongue as it glides against the wet expanse of his.

“I love being your fuck toy,” You mumble, pulling away and leaving string of saliva linked between you. His eyes glisten at your confession. It makes Harry smirk at you, his tongue escaping his mouth to sever the translucent connection.

The hand in your hair is breaking the sight between you both. His grip shoves your head directly into his lap, your nose digging into his crotch as his other hand goes back to rubbing your bruised skin.

“I think it’s time to put you to work.” Harry declares, his hold making you roam your face along his erection. Your breath rushing over his clothed shaft as he buries you into his lap.

The notifications of tips rings through the space. Audience entertained that you’re being degraded for their enjoyment. The thought alone arouses you, it made you moan against his cock. Followers and onlookers getting off to Harry completely doing anything that he wants to your body. Accepting the demeaning words that fuels your greed for pleasure, and letting him place as many smacks against your skin.

“Take my cock out.” He instructs, his grip relaxing as he lets you rise up to reach into his boxers.

Your hands glide over his member gracefully, fingers roaming over the thick expanse as your eyes look at him with pure adoration. Angry veins ranging in size roam under the stretched skin of him that has your mind completely hypnotized.

“Look at you,” Harry exaggerates with amusement. He gently slaps your cheeks in light taps, those motions making you smile with moan slipping out.

“Enjoying yourself like the slut you are,” He comments. His grip forcing the space between you and his dick to bring attention to pleasing him.

With fingers still lace in your hair, they effortlessly follow your movements when your head leans forward to pepper wet kisses along his shaft. Plump bitten lips smearing saliva messily over his erection, as they roam all along his length, tongue stretching around the girth.

Your hand goes to cup his balls, letting your mouth pick up motion with each descend down him. Tongue feeling over every inch, swallowing him down coating the expense of him in thick fluid from every stroke.

Your eyes flutter from the familiar feeling of him dragging down your throat. The way he fits so nicely like he was made to be there, it only makes you moan around him in pleasure. You love the way he stretches your throat blissfully, moving gracefully with the added slick. The sensation of him expending the flesh around him has your pussy throbbing for any form of treatment.

The quiver between your legs only increases when the grip Harry has in your hair is roughly forcing you back down his cock. Hips drawing slowly out of your mouth to push back in as he begins to fuck your throat. His nails curl into your scalp when he shoves your head all the way down to the point your nose is brushing against his groin, just letting you take his swift thrusts. His deep voice dripping in honey when satisfying groans pass through his lips.

“Take my dick like the good slut you are.”

Wet, obscure noise sounding throughout the atmosphere as he assaults your throat. His rough hands collecting your hair swiftly as he continues to drag your head up and down his cock. The aggressive lunges he makes with his own hips to meet your mouth causes your chest to burn for air.

Your palms tear away from his balls and run across his upper thighs, eyes barely open from the lack of oxygen running through your system. Your mind goes completely numb to the control he has over your movements.

And just as your nose brushes against his skin once more, he relaxes his grip in your locks, letting his fingers gently bring your head up. Heavy ragged breaths draw from your lips as your lungs ache in pain.

It’s only when you feel one of Harry’s hand leave from your hair to run across your face, that you feel wetness roam amongst your cheeks.

His other hand glides down your backside. Feeling over the bruised skin and slipping it between your legs to run his fingers down your folds. A hesitant breath escapes you with eyes blinking slowly at his dick glistening in your fluid.

“Always so wet for me, huh?” Index finger craving your clit around in circles.

You hum while nodding your head; your mind is in another dimension right now, you’re not even sure if you’re able to form coherent words. Your brain is in a cloudy daze, dancing between the raging sensations flowing through you.

It’s a mix between thrill and greed. You want more of Harry shoving himself down your throat till the point you pass out, you want him to push your face deeper down his cock and have your nails curling into his skin from the lack of oxygen. You want him to ruin you.

“So wet and ready to be used.” Harry states. Another finger occupying his movements, only causing your head to lean forward, broken whimper trailing out of your lips at the added pleasure you’ve been craving. “Be a good little slut for me. Won’t you baby.”

You nod your head, lashes fluttering against the hollows of your eyes while you lean forward and press lazy kisses along his dick. Harry motions continue to rub your clit around his two fingers, spreading your nectar along your folds with swiftness that you can’t help the moan that breaks through your lips.

“Say you’re gonna be a good slut for me.” His fingers continuing their fierce movements.

“I —I’m,” Voice coming out broken and damaged. Harry smirks at that. “I’m gonna be a good slut for you sir.” You manage to say, lips still roaming amongst his length.

“That’s my girl.”

His fingers leave your clit to dip between your folds and spread you open. Lengthy digits thrusting into your pussy slow. He feels the way your velvet walls sink around him, the sweet fluid that you’ve been producing since he’s been lying his hands on you, gliding down every inch of his skin as lets his fingers explore you.

You moan at the feeling of Harry slipping into your pussy provoking more filthy whimpers of pleasure, while your mouth drags down the expense of him.

You’re so turned on from the sensations coursing through you, you don’t even hear the constant pings of tips and comments coming through the chatroom. Viewers appreciate your tousled appearance and beg for more entertainment. They want more exposure of your skin being shown. They want more deafening slaps and disgraceful words, they want to see you wrecked.

Your lips wrap around Harry in a frenzy state, sucking him down your throat just the way you know he likes; tongue lying on the underside and feeling over every prominent blood vessel that blooms along his shaft, throat welcoming the thickness that buries itself deep in your throat till your nose is brushing up against his groin just like before.

As you continue to let pleasure course through you and roam down the span of him, Harry continues playing with your pussy. Lunging his fingers hungrily with your slick cascading down his fingers all the way to his knuckles, fucking his digits into your soiled box that you choke around him, only straining the burn in your throat.

“That’s my good slut.” Harry groans, his fingers curling into your heat as your eyes flutter. “Taking good care of my dick.” He continues to boast.

You hum from the gratitude, relishing in the compliment that’s given, you nod around him in acknowledgment with fingers curving gently into his skin while he continues his tantalizing motions.

“Wanna be an even better slut for me?” He questions. Your mouth drapes up the expense of him, saliva dripping from your lips as you turn to look up at him with swollen eyes and burning cheeks.

“Yes sir.” Nodding while blinking up at him. You’re sure the mascara that coated your lashes is all over your cheeks and streaked along the hollow of your eyes. You’re sure that Harry loves the damage he’s done to you.

“Gonna take my dick like the good girl you are? Huh? Don’t you want to be a good girl?” You moan at the words while nodding your head again at him. Whatever he wanted to do, you allowed. In the mind space your in, he could do no wrong.

“Yes sir.”

You let him push you off his lap and find his place behind you, handling you roughly as his hands leave your hair to position you better in the frame of your laptop. His fingers undo your bralette before pushing your back deeper into the duvet. His hands gliding down the smooth expense before tugging your skirt higher on your hips.

“Such a pretty pussy.” You hear behind you. Cock dragging down your aching heat.

“Please sir, I wanna feel you.” You moan, voice strained and raspy. Harry laughs behind you. Deep chuckle as if he’s amused by your comment. “Please sir, haven’t I’ve been good?” You beg, ass pressing deeper into his cock, that it only allows a smack to go across your cheeks.

“I don’t know, have you?” Pressing his cock between your folds to slide in effortlessly. Your walls expand around him, damaged voice moaning out swears from him filling you up completely as his hips meet your backside.

“Why did you lie to me?” Harry taunts, drawing back till his head is breached between your hole until he thrusts back in aggressively.

“Why did you lie to them?” He continues, his hand leaving your covered hips and bringing your wrist to hold behind your back.

You can only moan at the drastic strikes of his cock in you. He’s barreling down your walls aggressively that you’ve grown completely numb to the pleasure, just letting him manhandle you to the point you’re not even control of your emotions, he’s the one controlling them.

“Answer me!” He demands, his chest leaning in to grab your hair in his hands and twist your head to look directly into the camera.

“Tell them, tell me, why’d you lie.” Your eyes float over the colourful screen with black words darting up and down. There’s tears brimming your eyes at his thickness abusing your hole so roughly.

“I don’t know sir.” You whine, your free hand not in Harry’s grasp is curling into the duvet as he pounds away at your cervix.

“You don’t know?” He questions, continuing to bruise your pussy restlessly. You shake your head in his hold while whimpering at the pleasure. “You want me to give you the answer, will that make it easy for you? Hm?” He’s diving down your walls with such violation your mind is in a different place.

“Yes sir, tell me.” You moan into the sheets, the soft light from the laptop is blurry under your gaze.

“Because you’re a dirty slut. Say it, say “I lied because I’m a dirty slut.”” Nodding your head into the sheets you feel lonesome tears begin to run down your face as you let him degrade you for everyone and him to enjoy.

“I lied because I’m a dirty slut.” Crying into the sheets as he continues to stroke your walls dangerously.

“That’s right.” Harry husks, the grip he has in your hair releasing as it runs across your face wiping your tears. “But you’re my dirty slut. My dirty fuck toy.”

Shallow breaths draw in from your clit throbbing in arousal, your pussy continues to accept his thrusts that glide with ease from your nectar, walls enveloping him comfortably as he strides in with rough urgency.

He looks over your features; mascara smeared all over your cheeks, eyes trained dazzlingly at the screen beside you, chest heaving with ease as your backside sounds in the room with the fluid between your legs joining. He loves that he can push you to your limits and you still find pleasure in his devious ways. He loves that you accept his intensity with your own greed for wanting more.

“My pretty fuck toy. Only I can make you feel like this.” His hand coming between your thighs to toy with your clit. Heavy breath releasing from your chest as you dip your head in acknowledgment.

“Making you this needy over my cock. I know you love it.” You whine at the comment, knuckles going white against the bedsheets.

“Yes, fuck, sir, I love it.” Whimpering with gaze completely blurring with tears accepting his intense thrusts.

“My pretty slut.” Harry’s fingers rub your bundle of nerves in rough circles as he continues to drive your nerves up the wall.

The ringing from the laptop doesn’t overshadow the ones in your ears. Your eyes roll to the back of your head with it digging into the sheets. Your thighs quiver against his barreling ones, warm waves of euphoria coat your body in pure ecstasy from your climax overthrowing you.

Harry is grunting behind you, his movements never slowing just continuing their hungry paste. His hand that was wiping away your tears goes to land smacks against your backside to add to your electrifying orgasm coursing through you.

“Want me to make you even prettier? Want me to make you beautiful?” He insinuates, palm leaving another mark against your skin as he fucks you into the mattress.

The addicting sensation clouds over you from being completely disoriented at the assault between your legs. Brain in fuzzy whirlwinds of pleasure at the aftermath of your climax.

“Yes sir.” Whining with every jolt of your body.

“Gonna make you the prettiest toy.”

His hips lunge into you once more, thickness dragging down your walls enticingly before they pull out, his creamy seed runs down your folds in long spurts as he tugs himself off in front of your pussy.

Disappointing cry trails out of your mouth at the disappearance of his cock leaving your heat, but you can feel his cum running down your lips, and you can feel his hands roaming amongst your ass cheeks again.

“Look at you,” Harry smiles breathlessly, his grip over you making your backside face the laptop and display your ruined hole to the viewers.

“Look at how pretty you are.” His hands spreading your cheeks to showcase your pussy dripping in his cum.

There wasn’t much you could even do in the moment, continuing to let him present you as his fuck toy to your followers. The action had you actually smiling smugly into the sheets.

“My pretty girl.” Harry is leaving his place to lean over and press kisses along the side of your face.

And that is how your night ends, with the notifications blaring in the background with tips of your viewers thanking you for your first show.

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neverfilth · 3 months ago

Text

"Bloberta made Clay drink so-"

OKAY, BUT DO YOU KNOW WHY?

Let me explain

'Help'.

A very important word when describing Bloberta.

First, it is integral to understand that Bloberta feels torturously alone and unwanted. Her friends are all getting married while she has no one.

She isn't clever enough to help Censordoll.

Her own family leaves her out of the family choir.

And the only crumb of validation she is offered is from her mother.

“Why don't you help me out and… Clean your room?” Note even the slight pause her mother has, as if she doesn't even know what to do with Bloberta.

Next, we see her trudge to her room. And what does she hide under the covers of her bed?

A flask.

She turns to alcohol when she is confronted with how unwanted she is. But where did that draw to alcohol come from?

We know she comes from a home where she is ultimately ignored and seen as valueless by everyone except one person.

Her Father.

I have a lot of thoughts about Bloberta and Raymond's relationship (the one scene where they interact just UGH LIVES IN MY HEAD) but the main thing to get away from it is that she associates the act of drinking with her Father.

A man who, without alcohol, is unable to speak his mind at all. He drinks to better tolerate his situation and his wife, who clearly doesn't value his words or opinions.

But Bloberta is very receptive to her Father, she greatly values his company and his thoughts and she finds comfort in being around him. She feels like someone cares about her and values her even if she knows he can't change anything.

Notice that despite her desperation to speak with her father, to form that connection that would validate her, she can't even touch him because she knows doing so would break the frail connection they have currently. Her Father is so reserved that at this point, any unexpected emotional reach would immediately cause him to shut down and retreat. Demonstrated just by him closing up immediately after she told him she loved him.

So how does this affect Blobertas perception of alcohol?

Well she says it herself.

"I think it helps us to be better people".

This rationality was reinforced by the small acts of kindness her father would show her.

And we don't have any reason to believe she is lying about this because up until the night of the reception, she's experienced nothing that contradicts this belief.

Bloberta's reliance on alcohol can be seen as her reaching for a solution to her need to feel wanted. She knows she's left out, both by friends and family. But if she believes drinking can make you become a better person? Then of course she would drink, because maybe then someone will want her.

What does she say directly after that?

"My Father drinks.”

Further insinuating her belief that he is good and he is the main reason she sees alcohol as a positive force.

She thought it would genuinely help Clay.

There's that word again.

Importantly, notice her clear anxiety and tenseness in her beginning interactions with Clay. From her first question, their conversation began falling apart.

So what happened?

Just after the wedding, she was almost suave in the way she invited Clay to the reception.

Why was she so nervous now?

Well, in her eyes, this was her chance.

After an undisclosed time of having no luck she finally convinces a handsome single man to have some semblance of a date with her.

She NEEDS this to go well.

So she's obviously anxious and stressed, and that's showing, but she figures that some drinks will make it easier for both of them. She's full panicking because she feels it's just so normal to drink, especially socially, and she can't understand why he wouldn't drink. She has no frame of reference for that mindset.

Things are already awkward between them once they settle in, and its not getting better. So of course she is going to fall back on what makes things easier for her.

And initially things are looking up.

Suddenly Clay's more talkative, and more receptive to what she's saying.

He's complimenting her.

He says she helped him.

The one thing she wants more than anything is to feel useful, she wants to be able to fit into that role that everyone expects her to so that she can be of worth to someone.

She isn't worth it to her peers,

she isn't worth it to her family,

but she could be worth it to him.

This only reinforces her resolve.

This is it.

She is going to finally find her place to fit in, and everyone will welcome her with open arms as she finally finds her place in the role society has chosen for her.

But it's not that simple.

Things go south quickly, Clay doesn't want these things that Bloberta has to have.

But she needs them.

To Bloberta, those things are proof of your value. The value society, friends, and family place on you.

Who would she be if she couldn't attain that value?

We again recognize that Bloberta has a fixation on being helpful. Helpfulness is the clearest indication of one's value, after all.

After being turned away by Clay, she immediately returns to a default ‘helpful’ act, cleaning. Just like her mother would tell her to do. But this was still her only chance, and Clay had already told her she had helped him. If she could only help him again, then maybe she had a chance at the real value she craved.

Once her anger passes and Clay sobers up, she returns to him and paints herself as ‘helpful’ as possible. She's desperate for that validation again, and if he would agree to her help then everything would certainly be fine.

She is practically begging him, help becomes a plea for him to save her from the pain of her day to day.

She hopes more than anything he will accept her and make all her pain go away.

He does accept, but in exchange, her previous world view is shattered.

Drinks don't help you become a better person.

They just help your true nature come out.

#moral orel #bloberta puppington #bloberta hymentact #gotta go to bat for my girl here #long post

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whateveriwant · 11 months ago

Note

hi!! i really love your 141 headcannons, can i ask for the 141 with a exotic animal vet/zoologist s/o? tysm!!! 🤍

Soap

He thinks you are the coolest person to walk the planet

Seriously, with the way he looks at you sometimes, you swear it's like you're a superhero or something

Any chance he can get to brag about you to his friends, family, or even total strangers, he's taking it. And when he does start to talk, they better settle in for a while because he is not shutting up anytime soon

One of his favorite things about you is what he calls your “mental encyclopedia” of animals. It can be very helpful to refer to, especially when he's trying to describe exotic animals he's come across in the field

“What d’ye call those awkward, pine cone lookin’ lads?” he asks from the room over. You take a moment to think before shouting out your answer, a second later hearing the keys of his laptop clicking as he confirms for himself. “Pangolin! Yes! Tha’s the wee devil who stole my socks!”

Ghost

While he doesn't like to talk shop when it comes to his job, he could spend hours listening to you talk about yours

It's become a staple of your routine where every time you come home from work, he's there asking how your day went (and, get this, he's genuinely interested in your response)

Because he's usually pretty silent as he listens to you recount your day, sometimes you think he isn't even paying attention to you at all

But of course, just as soon as you begin to doubt him, he'll hit you with something that shows how attentive he's been all along

“How's Mona fairin’ by the way?” he asks one night in the middle of making dinner. Mona? The red panda who had a cough the other month? She's all well again, you tell him, surprised he remembered that. If he notices your shock, he doesn't say anything; he just gives a satisfied hum in response and continues cooking

Price

Because his job is so integral to who he is as a person, he loves having a partner who's also just as dedicated to their work as he is

He'll stop at nothing when it comes to supporting you and your dreams, a big one he knows is to travel the world one day. He plans to make that dream come true once he retires, but until then, he'll have to settle for bringing the world to you

Thus, every time he comes home from deployment, he's always bearing souvenirs – many of them featuring animals puns because he knows they're your favorite

It started as a joke at first when he saw a silly magnet he just couldn't pass up. But now it's become a proper tradition between you two, so every time he leaves, you're expecting to add another item to your collection once he returns

His favorite is a toss up between your ‘Toucan do it!’ inspirational poster and your matching ‘I'm with jackass’ / ‘I'm jackass’ donkey shirts

Gaz

He loves animals just as much as you do (if not more, honestly)

Literally on your first date together when you told him what you do for a living, he was about ready to drop down on one knee and pop the question right then and there

If it's a zoo or perhaps a sanctuary that you work at, you best believe you'll find him visiting you at every available opportunity he has

He sees you forgot your lunch at home? Oh no, he better bring it to you before you starve! He's running a few errands in the neighborhood? Hmm, might as well stop by and see his boo at work! (and, well, since he's already here, he might as well check out the new reptile exhibit you've been mentioning too)

Honestly, with just how frequently you're always bumping into him at work, you're convinced that most of the time he's not even there to see you

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michwritesstuff · 10 months ago

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She’s Gonna Save Me (Bridgerton: Benedict Bridgerton)

this is my first ever bridgerton fic! i’ve had such a writer’s block and post grad has been so difficult but listening to music and reading other writers’ works has me feeling inspired! so enjoy my first story in months and first of the new year :)

pairing: female reader (she/her) x Benedict Bridgerton reader x Colin Bridgerton (platonic!)

summary: Benedict contemplates a life pursuing art and living outside the expectations of his family and society. Does he find a wife and settle down or live freely? What happens when he meets someone who can offer him the best of both worlds?

notes/warnings: mention of nudity, alcohol consumption, activities that can be witnessed at Sir Granville’s scandalous studio saoirees…

word count: 2.4k

As the second eldest Bridgerton boy, Benedict never found himself extremely pressured by the standards and expectations of society. Those responsibilities were entrusted upon his brother, Anthony, the Viscount.

Benedict reserved himself to a more romantic life, preoccupied by his love and interest for art.

Attending every event of the season was merely a ploy to keep his mother happy and distracted from the fact that he had no true intention of courting any ladies.

He would drink, laugh, and dance the season away without ever calling on anyone.

Benedict believed that this season wouldn’t be any different.

******

When you first agreed to join your family friends across the Atlantic in London, you didn’t expect that you would be taking part in the ton’s social season.

As the youngest daughter, your brothers married with children and sisters off tending to their new husbands, your father didn’t feel the need to arrange a marriage for social or monetary gain.

Your family was well off in the states, your parents often described as ‘free spirits.’ They had always impressed upon you the importance of appreciating the beauty around you and romanticizing life.

With your mother’s passing, you decided to stay at home with your father, choosing to enjoy a quiet life in the country studying English literature.

Staying with Sir Henry Granville was beyond exciting and allowed you to interact and mingle with the more eclectic members of British society.

You had lasted all but a week before you were called upon by a Miss Lady Danbury.

She had stressed the importance of participating in the social season and the impending judgment of the ton and Queen if you did not participate.

While you never cared much for the opinion of others, you didn’t fancy the idea of being ogled every time you ventured into town.

******

“I heard she was rejected by every suitor.”

“She’s so ugly and unpleasant, a dowry wouldn’t even be worth it.”

“Apparently she’s slightly deformed.”

You couldn’t begin to believe the rumors circulating about you, the American.

You swore that the descriptions were ripped out of a storybook, describing some gremlin crawling from the depths of the earth.

Men and women alike had no problem spreading stories about the young lady joining them for the season.

Worst of all, none of them had even seen you yet. The modiste had made personal house calls, as requested by Lady Danbury.

Now you stood, in front of the carriage, at the first ball of the season, your debut.

You followed behind Sir Henry and Mary Granville, head held high and eyes straight forward as you waded through the ballroom towards Lady Danbury and the Queen.

You heard the whispers and felt the stares as you stood before the queen.

With one leg behind the other and your arms laid at your side, you gently bent your knee and curtsied before her.

She gave you a once over before bowing her head back, a silent approval.

Moving out of the way, you stood at the edge of the dance floor as Lady Danbury approached.

“Miss y/l/n, I do hope you don’t mind that I have taken the liberty of securing you a few gentlemen to fill out your dance card.”

“I expect nothing less from you, Lady Danbury” you smiled back, a teasing tone in your voice.

Your sarcasm and apprehension towards the season had not gone unnoticed by Lady Danbury.

She quite admired your wit and sharp mind, and more than anything, enjoyed the challenge.

******

You were now on your 4th dance of the night; your feet were hurting, and you wanted nothing more than to be curled up with a book.

Fortunately, your current dance partner was not completely awful and was actually quite charming.

Colin Bridgerton.

You had met him once before, in passing, when Lady Danbury had brought you to meet his mother, Violet, and sister, Daphne.

Apparently, Daphne had been named the Diamond of the season in her first season out on society and married a Duke.

His younger sister, Eloise, was preparing for her first season as well.

However, through your brief encounter with Eloise she did not seem as happy with the matter as her sister and mother were.

You had a feeling she would be a good person to befriend.

“Tell me about yourself Miss y/l/n” Colin inquired.

“Y/N,” you quickly corrected.

“Just Y/N is fine,” you smiled slightly.

“Well Y/N, how are you finding London and the beginning of the season?”

“London, well its quite beautiful. There is so much art, and history, and the architecture is amazing. Truly, I wouldn’t mind getting lost here. And well…this—” you paused, glancing around the ball at all the young women around you.

“May I be frank?” you asked, Colin’s eyebrows raising in surprise.

“Of course, Miss Y/N”

“I slightly detest all of this, my feet hurt, and I’ve been dancing for quite too long. Why would I want to marry someone I’ve met one time?”

Colin was slightly taken aback before grinning wildly.

“You remind me of my sister Eloise,” he stated.

“I’ll take that as a compliment, I quite liked her,” you grinned back.

As the dance ended you curtsied before Colin as he bowed before you.

“I hope you find the person you’re looking for Y/N, but I have a feeling you don’t need all of this to do so.”

You smiled widely and slightly nodded before following him off the dance floor.

“I’ll grab us a drink,” he said before walking away. Your eyes followed his back for a few seconds before scanning the room.

They quickly landed on two men whispering in the corner.

The slightly shorter one had massive sideburns and a quizzical look that seemed as if it must be permanently etched onto his face. The other man had a certain air about him.

Even from across the room his light-colored eyes had a shine in them.

Colin returned; you thanked him before looking to the corner again. This time the slightly taller one had caught your gaze and lifted his eyes to meet yours. You felt your face flush and quickly turned your head.

“Colin?”

“Yes?”

“Who are those two men in the corner?”

Colin looked up to see his brothers in the corner looking at him inquisitively.

“Oh, those two? You don’t want to be near the likes of them. Poorly mannered and when they were younger, they would wet the bed for years well beyond what was normal.”

You were following along for a while until that last part.

You gave Colin a quick look to see if he was being serious.

His mouth remained flat and tight-lipped for a few mere seconds before letting through a boisterous laugh.

“My apologies Y/N, those are my brothers.”

Your eyes widened at the confession.

“Your brothers?”

“Yes, lets introduce you,” he stated, beginning to pull you across the ballroom.

“Colin, No I—"

“Brothers, this is Miss y/l/n, Anthony, Benedict,” he pointed out.

You curtsied before both of them before speaking up.

“I told you, just Y/N is fine Colin.”

You weren’t sure what his brothers would say about your slight improperness. It was clear that the Bridgerton’s were a well-respected family in the ton.

You glanced at the eldest brother who you learned was named Anthony who gave you a curt nod before excusing himself to sneak off from an inquiring Lady Danbury.

You smiled at him before turning your gaze to the second eldest Bridgerton.

“Y/N here was telling me about her studies in the states. She is well-read and well-traveled.”

You rolled your eyes, playfully pushing Colin slightly.

“You flatter me, Colin. Unfortunately, I am not perfect. For example, I am about done with all of this and was just about to call a carriage.”

“Oh, but you must stay for one more dance Y/N. Poor Benedict here has not waltzed once.”

Benedict tried to sneakily hit his brother for his clear meddling.

“While that may be true, I do not need my younger brother imposing on such a lovely lady.” Benedict states.

“Nonsense, everyone must waltz at least once,” you laughed, pulling Benedict towards the center of the room.

His eyes widened at your forwardness as he shot Colin a disapproving brotherly look, to which Colin gave him a grin and thumbs up.

As the music began you moved around the room with Benedict.

“So, Mr. Bridgerton, tell me what exactly it is you do.”

“Just Benedict is fine,” he stated, mirroring your words from earlier.

“Besides, aren’t I the one who should be questioning you about your skills?”

“That’s awfully backwards thinking, I hope you don’t get stuck that way” you replied sarcastically before being spun around.

When you returned facing Benedict, a knowing grin was stuck on his face. You were witty. He liked witty.

“I suppose that is fair. I’m an artist, well…I’m trying to be an artist. It’s a little complicated.”

You nodded understandingly, while the arts were enjoyed by many, it wasn’t exactly a noble pursuit, especially for you as a woman.

“You should come by Sir Granville’s studio, it’s quite…”

You couldn’t think of a proper word to describe the soirees Granville hosted. It was taboo and scandalous to most respectable members of society. However, if Benedict was an artist as he was claiming, he should fit right in.

“…inspiring,” you finished.

Benedict gave you an interesting look.

Little did you know, he had been to Granville’s studio, several times.

He hadn’t been in a while since his family had just returned from Aubrey Hall and the preparation for Eloise’s season had been quite hectic for his mother.

But you, picturing you at Granville’s studio was not something Benedict had imagined.

Women who were married or of low social standing was something else, but you, a young lady in her first official season stalking down the halls in such a disreputable manner. It didn’t fit the picture of the beautiful woman before him.

Benedict was quickly learning not to try and categorize you into one box.

“What do you know of Granville’s studio?” he asked seriously.

“Well, for one, I’m staying there. Two, I feel more comfortable among that community than here, if you understand what I mean…” you trail off.

Benedict gives you a small smile of understanding.

As the song ends Benedict lifted your hand to his mouth, kissing it gently before sightly lowering it back down, fingers brushing softly as he pulls away.

“Until next time Y/N”

“I look forward to it Benedict.”

******

Two months had passed since Lady Danbury’s first ball of the season. In that time you had befriended Eloise and Colin Bridgerton, often sitting in the parlor room of their home during the daytime, chatting the day away.

As such, you had also grown closer to Penelope Featherington who also came over often. You always considered yourself to be quite perceptive, so it was evidently clear that Penelope was fond of Colin. You thought about mentioning something, but it didn’t seem like your place.

Throughout your time at the Bridgerton’s household you had seen Benedict a handful of times. Unfortunately, your encounters were reduced to small greetings, stolen glances and light brushes as you walked past each other.

Until today.

You were sitting in the empty parlor room as Eloise ran to her room to fetch some ‘evidence’ and ‘clues’ about Lady Whistledown.

“Good Afternoon Y/N” Benedict greeted as he walked in, taking a quick look around the room to find the two of you alone.

“Afternoon Mr. Bridgerton,” you greeted back, a slight teasing tone to contrast your seemingly formality.

He gave you a knowing look before continuing.

“I hope I’m not being too forward, but I plan on attending Sir Granville’s tonight, I was wondering if I would see you there?”

You gave him a teasing smile before your face fell into a serious and hurt look.

“Mr. Bridgerton, I’m appalled, would a respectable young woman such as myself be caught there? Imagine the horror if the rest of the ton were to find out.”

He let out a loud laugh at your remark, in the short time that he had known you, you never failed to make him laugh.

“Yes Benedict, I’ll see you there,” you smiled.

“Good,” he replied.

******

That night you had a few drinks to help you take the edge off before guests started coming over. There was something about interacting with Benedict that made you nervous.

You were walking around the art studio observing the nude model and the artists renditions when you felt someone lay their hand on your shoulder.

“OH! Oh my, Benedict, you scared me.”

“Sorry, love, didn’t mean to startle you.”

You continued walking around the circle, admiring the art around you.

“She’s stunning, is she not?” you questioned.

“She is,” he answered quickly.

However, when you turned to look at him his eyes were already trained on yours.

You smiled widely, walking out of the studio as Benedict followed like a lost puppy.

“Will I ever get to see your art?” you asked him.

He smiled sheepishly as his arm reached back to scratch the back of his neck.

“I certainly would let you, if there was any.”

“Practicing here for a few months and you still have nothing to show?” you teased.

Benedict gave you a look.

“I may have asked around about you,” you confessed.

“And?” he asks.

From what you have heard, both from his siblings and other people around you. Benedict was a kind and creative soul, with a great appreciation for the beauty around him.

“Your family and friends speak highly of you, that’s important.”

“What about you? What do you speak of me?”

“Besides being a tortured artist? I think highly of you.”

He nodded his head again, before responding.

“I think highly of you as well,” he whispered quietly, leaning down slightly so he was more at eye level.

You blamed the alcohol in your system for what you did next.

Yanking him down by his collar, you pulled him close and reached up until your lips were flush against his, pushing with all your might as if you would never kiss him again.

“Y/N—” he pulled away, his senses flooding back.

“This is…no, I’ve dishonored you I—”

“Oh hush Benedict, I do not care about those rules. I want you.”

He looked down at you, holding your face in his hands as he searched your eyes for confirmation.

Biting your lip and grinning up at him, Benedict couldn’t help but pull you back in, one hand sinking to your waist to pull you closer, the other rested on your cheek.

“You know this means we have to get married now?” Benedict teases.

“That means you presume I would say yes,” you teased back.

His smile grew impossibly bigger as he pulled you back in for a tender kiss.

“Let’s just see how you perform tonight before we think about marriage” you joked.

Benedict pulled back with a smirk and look in his eye you haven’t seen yet as he looked you over.

“Art is all about practicing and perfecting, we might need to practice a few times before you make your final judgement” he teased back.

You threw your head back in surprise, a large laugh leaving your lips before you smiled sweetly at him.

This was not how you imagined the social season going.

check out the rest of my work ⤑ here!

#teentvimagines #bridgerton #bridgerton imagine #benedict bridgerton #benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton x you #benedict bridgerton x y/n #benedict #benedict bridgerton x female reader #benedict bridgerton imagine #bridgerton masterlist #bridgerton imagines #anthony bridgerton #colin bridgerton #eloise bridgerton #daphne bridgerton #Spotify

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who-is-there · 6 months ago

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Deciding to write a fantasy high au where the Rat Grinders hide their connection to the overarching plan better than in canon. This is achieved by them actually (basically) stalking the Bad Kids everywhere, so they know more.

Or that was the plan. But it turns out that Kipperlily is really the only one sneaky enough to get away with it, so for the time skip between the beginning of Sophomore year and spring break, the Bad Kids keep accidentally finding the Rat Grinders watching them. It’s weird the first few times, but then the Rat Grinders are sort of- unofficially invited? to hang out with the Bad Kids? Like, they aren’t told when and where, but the Bad Kids usually just invite them into the conversation and talk to them more if they’re found out. Kipperlily encourages this because it means they’ve got more intell.

Except that’s not what happens. They ask Ruben about school, and the way he describes bard classes actually convinces Fig to give them a try. She introduces him to new music, and they start writing songs for each other to look over. When Fig starts her band, she asks Ruben and his band to be her first opener. The two have a decent overlap in audience, but they also pull their own listeners into each others music.

When Fabian asks Mary Ann about her tamagotchi friend, she’s the most excited they’ve seen her. Gorgug asks about it a little, and confines that it’s the small, complex kind of tech he’d never be able to make. The bad kids encourage him, and around winter break he comes in with a- strange looking bird that he says is named Chloe, but that’s not what it responds to. A few weeks after they come back from their spring break, Gorgug gives Mary Ann a construct of her tamagotchi, small enough to fit in her bag, and she cries.

Ivy tries to get Fig on the ‘mean girl’ idea, but Fig shuts it down pretty quickly. She introduces Ivy to Baxter, and Ivy now comes to the Manor solely to pet him. She meets Sandra-Lynn, who sees this girl that is almost her, and asks Jawbone to have a talk with her, just once. Ivy tends to be quieter nowadays, but a little nicer too, and Fig can understand her mom a little more with Ivy next to her.

Adaine and Oisin meet earlier, and the two talk more about their school work. Adaine apologises for not remembering him, and the two are a speed team in their class that semester. The first time Oisin made a comment concerning lower classes, Fabian pulled him aside and they have a talk about family, and what it means to use your class to help others rather than insult them. They both come out of it a little better.

Lucy and Kristin talk some. Kristin still likes hearing about other Gods, and Lucy doesn’t often get to talk about her ancestral religions. She helps Kristin and Tracker, since she doesn’t have anything against other Clerics or their religions. When Kristin gets doubt, she talks it out, and Lucy learns some spine from Kristine assertiveness.

With Riz, the Rat Grinders have been told stories from Kipperlily, so they expect things, but Riz isn’t like that. He isn’t dismissive or impersonal, and while he’s definitely- intense, there isn’t superiority there like they thought. When he talks about his dad or his home life, they don’t see a great backstory like Kipperlily wants, they see a kid at their age, that has to do twice as much for half the reward. They don’t know how to tell her.

But he does relax. With more people helping each other, Riz is a little less stressed. And the Rat Grinders, more than anything, see an adventuring party that are actually friends, that rely on each other and actually hang out together outside campaigns.

And then Spring break happens, and it’s a little better. The Rat Grinders convive Kipperlily to go on another quest, instead of to the mountains. Gorgug is more secure, Fabian’s more aware, Adaine has pushed her spells more, Riz is a little less stressed, Fig’s more focused and Kristin still doubts, but she’s better at taking about it. But it’s still bad. They still go through the forest, still have to deal with fighting and their fears, still get beat up and everything.

And when they come back, the Rat Grinders don’t see them getting praise. They don’t see all the great rewards for saving the world they expected. What they see, is a change to a deadline that was going to happen anyway, and that this group of people that were kind to them have gone through absolute hell. They’re tired, they’re scared, it’s rough. And then a week later, they’re running off again, after an endless night. And when they come back, it’s just more consequences and reprimands from a system that the Rat Grinders have been told favours the Bad Kids. And they realise that maybe Kipperlily doesn’t understand the Bad Kids as well as she thinks.

#adaine abernant #fabian seacaster #fantasy high #figeroth faeth #gorgug thistlespring #kristen applebees #riz gukgak #the bad kids #dimension 20 #rat grinders #long post

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ittybittyremy · 3 months ago

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All the details Bells Hells know about Cyrus' death & everything surrounding it

I've been seeing people wondering/forgetting how much Dorian has told Bells Hells about the circumstances of Cyrus' death. So I've decided to go through the episodes!

A couple disclaimers before I start:

Orym shouldn't have made that comment to Dorian. Even if he didn't know all the specifics, knowing Dorian's brother died recently (and at all for that matter) should have stopped him from making that theoretical. Even if Cyrus' death had nothing to do with the gods, it would still be an inappropriate thing to say. He could've made that theoretical to anyone else in that group but he said it to the person with a recently dead family member.

Even though it would be beneficial for Dorian to tell BH (and for BH to learn/understand) everything about that day, he doesn't have to (and` shouldn't be forced to). Plus, it's very in character for Dorian not to tell them.

I don't want to see any comments saying "well it's implied," "BH should be able to connect the dots," or "BH should get the hint because of how Dorian has been acting." I'm bad at picking up hints irl so I won't fault BH for not connecting those points.

This post is about what Dorian has explicitly said (even though I did add a couple parts where he implies what happens).

This is all under the assumption that Dorian has not told BH everything off camera.

All timestamps will be based on the YouTube VOD.

I may miss a couple tidbits so sorry in advance.

Now to the actual information

Episode 93

Cyrus died (3:43:24)

Two of Dorian's best friends became the champions of the Matron of Ravens and the Spider Queen (3:43:28)

It all happened yesterday (3:43:38)

Opal is "not really" okay (3:43:45)

Cyrus died in battle "if you can call it that" (3:53:36)

Until that day he never thought real evil existed (3:53:46)

What he saw in the previous couple days does was "irredeemable" (3:53:55)

They tried to help Opal (3:54:59)

Dorian knows that there are forces enacting on the world that go "deeper than [he] imagined" (3:55:05)

Fy'ra Rai stayed with Opal (3:55:16)

Dariax is "all right" (3:55:20)

Opal is alive but corrupted (3:57:04)

Fy'ra Rai may be walking down the path as Opal (3:57:12)

Episode 94

Dorian doesn't explicitly mention it this episode but there is a moment where he hints that the prime deities may have somehow been involved.

"If you are relying on the help of the gods, champions, I can't say that I trust them anymore" (2:30:17)

Episode 102

No explicit mentions here BUT we begin to get Dorian's opinions of the gods. That's not what this post is about so I will move on

Episode 103

More of Dorian's views on the gods and we finally get another (sort of) explicit mention

"The last I conferred with a god, they cared very little about the feelings of anyone around us." That god being the Spider Queen (1:37:01)

The reason I say "sort of" is because Dorian doesn't say this is in regards to Cyrus' death (even though we the audience knows this). Orym and Fearne could've easily assumed that this was in regards to their EXU times.

Episode 109

Get an idea of what "getting dark" means. Matt describes Opal as "a humanoid shape of white hair and a black crown dripping and black oil and ichor. Opal stands dark and still" (2:19:13)

"Opal the Twice-Crowned, born a fractured, dual soul. A being of unknown potential, manipulated by cult and betrayer gods alike to walk a violent path without agency, a pawn for the gods and their whims." Raven Queen describing Opal (2:19:32)

Opal has a spider form (different from three-armed Opal) (2:49:20)

Episode 110

Dorian remind Bells Hells that Opal is now the champion of the Spider Queen (51:29)

Laudna says "hang on, because didn't, the last time you saw Opal, wasn't she trying to brutally murder you?" (52:22). I guess BH knows it was the Spider Queen? I'm a bit confused because Dorian never explicitly told them this but maybe it was an off screen thing

Dorian: "I'm not certain any information we would get from her would be particularly reliable" (52:30)

What does Bells Hells know?

As far as they know, the day before Dorian reunited with Bells Hells:

Cyrus died in a (sort of) battle.

They tried to help Opal but she is corrupted, she is still alive though

Fy'ra Rai stayed with Opal

Dariax is safe

Opal and someone else are now the champions of the Spider Queen and Matron of Ravens.

Dorian discovered real evil existed

The title "Opal the Twice-Crowned"

Opal's spider form (but different the three-armed Opal that Dorian saw)

Opal is not a reliable source of information right now

What does Bells Hells not know?

Wildmother refused to help

Matron refused to help

The Spider Queen killed Cyrus (? tbh i'm confused about this one)

Dorian came here because Opal casted mass suggestion

Dorian abandoned Dariax

Opal's memories are either gone or altered

Opal with three arms

The whole Ted thing

And much more

#if i forgot anything important please let me know #dorian storm #cyrus wyvernwind #critical role #critical role campaign 3 #bells hells

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808len808 · 1 year ago

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Crack Baby

!Leon S. Kennedy x Gender Neutral Reader!

Summery: After coming home from your mission, Leon notices something different in you.

Authers note: Thank you for all the likes and reposts on "Noted"! This story isn't really based on the song Crack Baby from Mitski, but it does describe the feeling that the "reader" has. Plus I absolutely love the song.

!Warnings!: self-harm, eating disorders, depression, trauma.

(Words: 4,210)

You had just gotten back from a mission, the most horrible mission you have ever had the misfortune of being on. You witnessed your whole squat being executed in front of you while you were powerless, you couldn’t save them and you blamed yourself immensely for it. Your agents, your friends…

The door to your apartment opened slowly you fumbled around with the key before taking it out of your front door and putting it back in your pocket while stepping inside the apartment you shared with your boyfriend Leon. You and he worked together at the D.S.O as a federal agent. You met him there with him accompanying you on many missions. You two were amazing together in battle and got along very well. So well that he asked you out to dinner after your second mission together. There was an instant click between the two of you and you became close friends slowly growing on each other till the point where he came over every day even when you already worked together even sleeping over sometimes. You knew everything about him even his past just like he knew you better than you knew yourself at times. The friendship bloomed slowly into something much more. Ending up with you asking him out since he wouldn’t pick up on your signals, even after you had kissed him. He had moved in with you mere weeks after dating since your apartment had an extra room that you didn’t use.

Fast forward to 6 months, now.

You had been nothing but happy for the last six months he was the best partner you could’ve hoped for, he was sweet, caring, funny, and could cook a really nice dinner. He was perfect. You’d sometimes think that you didn’t deserve him and he would help you overcome it together with the rest of your insecurities. He was super understanding even when you told him about your history of mental illness and your scars from the past. Of course, he had his flaws too, a full hand of trauma and other family issues. Leaving him with panic attacks and a lot of PTSD. You were always there to comfort him always.

Leon heard the door of the apartment open he immediately sprung up from the couch a big smile was painted on his face when he saw you.

“You’re back” his voice was high-pitched.

You had been gone for a bit more than a week and he was getting worried. He had texted and called you over a million times but you seemed radio-silent the whole time. His heart raced when he saw you, his eyes lit up as if he had just come to life by seeing you. There was a huge wave of relief through his body he couldn’t even begin to describe the ecstasy he felt when seeing you, even when you looked like shit. He almost ran over to you a happy hop in his feet as he wrapped his arms around your tired body. He snuggled his face in your neck and closed his eyes in the warm embrace. But to Leon’s dismay, he felt you flinch beneath him but he didn’t want to let go of you just yet.

“I was so worried” his voice cracked when he spoke into the crook of your soft neck. “I’ve called you, but you didn’t respond, and I thought-“

He stopped himself before he continued because he didn’t feel your arms around him. Your arms had just stayed by your side not moving as if you were frozen, like a statue glued to the wooden floor of your apartment. A frown caught his brows and he removed his arms from you leaving the one-sided hug. It’s now that he got a good look at you, your eyes seemed dead as if your soul was a second away from disappearing your face pale with dark half moons under your eyes, you looked like shit. He noticed a new scar on the side of your right eyebrow a dark red stitched wound against the cold skin on the eyebrow.

“Are you okay?” his tone sounded even more worried than before a concerned frown on his face as he examined yours.

“Yea just tired”, you managed to squeeze out before walking away.

“Wait” he grabbed your wrist before you could walk any further the grip was gentle but at the same time had some firmness to it.

“You’ve been gone for like a week can we at least-, talk?” You turned your face around. But all Leon could see was the way your whole body was shaking under his touch it was an upsetting view, the way your hand trembled while he held your wrist. His brows knitted together a hopeless look on his face.

“I- I’m just really tired. I want to take a shower and so to sleep.” You explained but he could even hear the shaking in your voice. You were staring at the ground he desperately tried to get a chance to look into your eyes, but you seemed to be avoiding his gaze, you seemed to be avoiding him.

“Okay, we’ll talk in the morning yeah?” The gentleness of his voice made you nod. And so he let go of your wrist even when he didn’t want to. Even when the only thing he wanted to do was hold you in his arms the way you had held him every time he came back from another traumatizing mission. You and Leon were different in that way, Leon was always looking for physical touch, he lived for it, the only thing he wanted to do all day was hug you cuddle you or you cuddle him he loved either. He loved your soft touch the way your body fit so perfectly in his warm embrace the way he could bury his face in your neck.

But you were the opposite Leon had noticed that each time you had come back from a mission you just seemed to want to distance yourself from him. He learned that sometimes physical touch was too much for you, That you couldn’t handle being touched while you were overwhelmed sometimes. He didn’t really understand it he couldn’t really grasp it but still, he took note of it and didn’t attempt to touch you when you told him that it was too much. Eventually, he could pick up on the signs. He could tell when you wanted to be touched and in which way you wanted to be touched if it would result into cuddles or something more intimate. He could also pick up on when it was too much for you, your body language he knew it all. And right now it was definitely too much so he left you to yourself which he knows now was a bad idea.

Leon still had to go to work that day but you got the week off due to the mission. Leon still didn’t know what had happened on that mission since you still hadn’t talked to him. You were supposed to talk in the morning but when he came to your room last night to lay with you, you shook him off and told him that you wanted to be left alone even when you were asleep.

So that was the first night in 5 months that Leon had slept in his own room. You couldn’t really call it sleeping more like staring at the ceiling the whole night while he thought of you. He was worried sick and just wanted to comfort you so that it would calm his nerves but at last, he was sent away. He didn’t close one eye that night so he was desperately waiting for it to become morning so that he could talk to you. And so morning came. He was up early mostly because he couldn’t sleep but also because he wanted to make your favorite breakfast since he knew you were going through something that he had yet to understand.

He cooked up your favorite food for breakfast he was really proud of how it turned out actually even when he had already made it many times, still he felt good knowing it meant so much to you. He had to leave for work at 9 am so when the clock hit 8 and a half he had already expected you up since you had gone to bed so early the day before but he still hadn’t heard a sound come out of your room and the food was getting cold.

He sneaked to your room and saw you sound asleep under the many blankets you had on your bed. Even in summer, you insisted on having them but now it was fall and it was getting colder. Even under those blankets you wore a hoodie. Normally you wore a shirt in bed because Leon was basically a walking heater. But now that you had slept alone it was cold for more than one reason, just like how you wore the hoody for more than one reason too.

Leon’s eyes softened when he saw you peacefully resting. soft breaths came out of you as he admired you from the door frame. You looked so relaxed almost happy. He snapped out of his staring and walked over to the bed gently shaking you awake.

“Babe?” He saw your eyes veagely open a soft grumble escaped your lips.

“Five more minutes”

“I have to leave for work in five more minutes” Leon softly said with a chuckle escaping his lips.

“Hmm,” You turned your back to Leon and pulled the blanket over your head as if to say let me sleep. Leon got the hint and left you be even when he really wanted to talk.

“All right, we’ll talk at dinner tonight, you just catch some sleep yeah? I have to go.”

“hm”

“There’s breakfast on the table.” No response. He sighed before leaving your room and closing the door behind him. He wasn’t sure how he’d be able to work with him being so concerned but he didn’t really have a choice anyway, besides maybe he could get some answers at HQ about what happened on your mission since you didn’t want to talk.

And so he left for work. At headquarters, he was met with the receptionist who seemed worried when he saw Leon walk in. The D.S.O. had known about the relationship between you and Leon and that you lived together.

He walked up to the desk to register himself but was met with a concerning conversation.

“How are they holding up?” The receptionist spoke while looking up at Leon before even beginning to register him.

He shrugged his shoulders because he had no idea how to respond the the receptionist. He didn’t even know what happened he knew something was wrong, but he had no idea what.

“I don’t know, we haven’t really had a chance to talk.”

The receptionist frowned at his answer.

“Do you know what happened on that mission Leon?” she consciously asked and spoke as if she was scared of someone hearing them.

“No” he responded a guilty tone underlying his voice.

“The mission failed, and they witnessed-… they witnessed it all go down before they were rescued by the BSAA.” her voice went quieter

Leon felt his heart sink to his stomach “The BSAA? Why didn’t we rescue them?” Leon bluntly responded almost sounding mad.

“We thought they were dead. They had been radio silent for so long and- The D.S.O. just didn’t want to waste time.”

Leon felt a wave of rage hit him when the innocent receptionist spoke “Waist time?!”

The receptionist stayed quiet like she didn’t know how to respond.

Leon’s blood was boiling the D.S.O. didn’t even bother to look for you?! to try and save you or contact you?! He was fuming.

After possibly the longest feeling day at work and a very angry conversation that he had with the people that navigated your mission he stepped into his car still fuming. He had to get a hold of his emotions if he wanted to talk to you. He wasn’t mad at you no you didn’t do anything wrong it was just the assholes that he and you worked for that he wanted to punch to pulp the fact that he could’ve lost you because the D.S.O because they didn’t want to “waist time” was making his stomach turn. He was worried sick about you literally.

He hurriedly opened the front door just wanting to see you to comfort you maybe hold you if you let him. He just wanted to be with you again to never let you leave his sight. He was so scared of losing you and the fact that it almost happened was tearing him apart.

The first thing he saw was the food he made for breakfast it was in the same spot that he had left them seemingly untouched still on the table. His brows knitted together in the same upset look that he had worn for the past few days. He knew something was off immediately. He didn’t see you, he assumed you were in the living room playing games or watching something or reading but he found the room to be empty which worried him even more. Had you even been out of your room? It was already 6 pm. You must be hungry seeing you left your breakfast untouched.

Leon made his way over to your room and saw you lying in your bed your eyes fixated on your phone. You didn’t even look up when Leon entered your room.

“Hey sweetheart, how are you holding up?” his voice was sweet and he saw your eyes glance over at him just for a second before going back to your phone.

“Fine” Your voice was hoarse and you looked even more tired than before even after you had slept. He sat down at the side of your bed as you spoke ignoring the way you didn’t even bother to look at him. He had to ask it or else he wouldn’t be able to calm his mind down, he gulped before opening his mouth again.

“Have you- ehm… eaten anything today?” Your eyes darted at him before nervously looking beneath you at your bed and then back to your phone

“Yeah… yeah of course” Liar, the worst thing was Leon knew that you were lying. And the fact that you were made it even worse for him. How could he even respond to that? What was he supposed to say?

“Okay… Well, what would you like for dinner tonight?” Your anxiousness gave off as you bit the inside of your mouth making it even more apparent to Leon that you were lying.

“I’m not hungry” Your eyes went back to Leon’s and you saw the way he wasn’t buying it.

“Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not-“

But he already stood up not wanting to hear any more of your excuses.

“I’m making spaghetti,” he responded, leaving your room.

He should have seen this coming, he knew about your past and that you could sometimes struggle with eating. So when he forced you to come out of your room and sat you down at the table he didn’t expect you to dig in.

You looked down at the plate of spaghetti beneath you while you could feel Leon’s eyes piercing through yours. Your pulse was pumping an anxious look on your face, you had nowhere to go now.

“So how was your day?” Leon broke the silence.

“Oh, you know…” you responded trailing off as you looked back down at the favorite food that your boyfriend had made.

It fell silent again.

“Sweetheart, I heard what happened, I’m so sorry you had to go through tha-“

“I don’t want to talk about it” You interrupted looking sharply into Leon’s soft eyes while yours only hardened.

You could feel nervousness spread over your face and you knew Leon could see it too. You tried and tried to not think about it, you wanted to forget, to forget everything, and to just not think or feel anything, your chest hurt and it became harder to breathe.

You avoided Leon’s gaze as if it were the plague, you couldn’t bear to see him worried because it only made you more guilty. You didn’t want him to worry about you, you didn’t want anyone to worry about you, it was your problem and you should work your feelings out yourself.

Leon looked pleading, big eyes trying to catch yours “Please eat something” Your lips pursed into a thin line as you felt your brain mingle with the cloudiness of overwhelming stress. You needed to get out of this situation as fast as possible, you needed to find some sort of escape or excuse. “I told you I’m not hungry.”

“I don’t believe that” Leon sternly responded. You looked down at your full plate and felt your stomach turn, you felt empty yet so full of everything like it would just flow over at any moment. You hadn’t even lifted up your cutlery or even your arm for that matter, you didn’t feel safe somehow even when you knew you were there was this feeling lingering that just made you want to run away. “Can we please not talk about this right now?” your voice was barely louder than a whisper as you stared down at your hands on your lap, nervously fiddling with the fabric of your pajama pants.

Leon leaned in closer, he didn’t want to stress you out. He’s trying his best not to be nosy, or to get you mad. But this answer only confirmed his suspicions were right. “Tell me what’s going on,” Leon said completely ignoring your protests.

You took a deep breath in yet it didn’t fill your lungs. “I’m tired” you croaked out your throat suddenly dry and weak. You stood up your chair sounding too loud as it scraped against the wooden floor.

The atmosphere was cold, and you actually were tired, exhausted even, but that was no excuse. You turned around your eyes strictly glued to the ground.

The hairs on your arm stook up as you felt a hand on your shoulder, your whole body tingled and tensed, Leon had stood up and was right behind you. “You’re not leaving until you tell me what’s going on” Leon’s voice sounded hurt but it was still gentle, somehow it made you snap, you had made it really clear you didn’t want to talk and Leon was pushing the wrong buttons now.

“Leave me alone,” you gritted through your teeth, turning back to face Leon’s shocked expression. but the hand on your shoulder didn’t move. “Look-“ Leon sighed as he lowered his hand on your shoulder, he tried to be as calm and gentle as possible. He thought for a moment, picking his words very carefully. “This” Leon stopped again looking at you with concern. “This is not okay.”

You took a deep breath in, as hurt and tired as you were, you didn’t want this to turn into an argument. “I know this isn’t okay, but just-“You took a look back into Leon’s eyes but immediately regretted it and looked back to your side.

Your hands kept busy picking at the hem of your hoody and making small dreads come out of the fabric. “I’m fine, we don’t need to talk about it” you mumbled.

Leon shook his head, as much as you can hide it, it doesn’t make it go away. You felt your heart beating on your eardrums, your socks were put on wrong and your hands were sticky with sweat and your hoody rubbed against your wrist too hard and-

“You are not fine,” Leon said his tone more firm, he wasn’t budging.

It was all too much. “Fuck! Just leave me alone!” You snapped in Leon’s face, your skin felt like it was burning. Leon’s eyes widened and there was and you could just see the slight shock on his face before quickly turning away to finally go back to your room.

Leon’s expression hardened. You needed to talk, he needed to understand and he wasn’t giving up on that so easily, he was your boyfriend for fuck’s sake. Leon swiftly grabbed your wrist in a fit of instinct mixed with hurt, you were still in the midst of walking away as he grabbed you by the wrist making your sleeve roll up a bit on its own as you tried to wiggle out of his grip it made it worse, and before you knew it you were facing Leon again.

You looked him in the eyes but to your dismay, Leon’s eyes were pointed down, you followed his gaze only to find him staring at the bit of exposed wrist, the wrist you had cut today.

The scar was barely healed and gave off a strong red color as if it wanted to stand out, you felt the breath get knocked out of your throat and you quickly looked up to Leon who was now looking at you with wide eyes and mouth agape as if he couldn’t comprehend what he was seeing, you felt your face burn up as more panic hit you like a hurricane, leaving you feeling almost dizzy.

You were speechless and so was Leon, you both stood like statues with Leon staring at you as your eyes averted back to the ground. “Leon I-“ you tried but he just stayed still before his expression turned stern almost like he was angry.

You didn’t dare move scared of what Leon would think or feel if you did you looked so distressed it was almost unhealthy. You wanted the ground to swallow you whole and hide there for the rest of your life, covered in darkness so that nobody could ever see you again, so you could never see Leon’s face like this, so you wouldn’t exist.

The next few things that happened turned into a blur, Leon almost dragged you outside and into his car, not caring that your wrist was still exposed and not caring that there were now tears rolling down your face, you were sat in his car, and he drove off with you without saying a word, he looked pained and he kept biting his lip.

He wasn’t looking at you, the car ride felt dreamingly long the car filled with the sound of your held-back sobs as you stared out the window.

To your surprise he brought you to the building where you had therapy, you hadn’t had a session in ages, the building made you gulp, Leon opened the door for you and you walked quietly beside him, sniffing back your tears as you walked the halls that the receptionist had told you to go.

With every step and every door you passed, you got more anxious, getting warmer and warmer to your destination was getting your pulse more heightened.

The building smelled stuffy like an old hospital or elderly home, suffocating you with dust.

The door was opened the familiar face of your therapist standing in the door. She welcomed you in with a warm smile and left Leon outside, You could faintly hear her tell Leon to wait in the waiting room.

Leon was a nervous wreck at this point his lip bleeding from how much he had been tormenting it with his teeth, he waiting room was empty with a few comfy chairs with an ugly yellow color on the wall, there were magazines placed by the coffee table but Leon couldn’t even think about reading right now. His leg bounced uncontrollably his eyes darting around the room his brain going too fast for his own body to keep up.

“Mister Kennedy?”

Leon looked up and was met with the pleasant face of a woman. “Yeah?” Leon asked hoping his voice didn’t give away how nervous he was. “I want to talk to you about Y/N’s situation”, she spoke keeping her eyes on Leons. He felt his pulse increase as he nodded. “Okay,” he breathed standing up and following the older woman.

She led him to a cozy room decorated with all sorts of plants and paintings. She asked him many questions, and so did Leon asks her. After talking and giving advice to Leon about what to do she led him out. Leon opened the door but just as he was about to leave he turned around and asked one last question. “Are they going to be okay?” his voice showed his hesitance. The therapist smiled, “They’ll be just fine Mister Kennedy”. Leon gave her a small nod and sighed as he closed the door behind him.

Walking back to the waiting room he came across you. His face immediately softened as he saw you. “Hey,” he said dryly immediately regretting how formal it sounded.

“Hey” you replied back with a sad smile, your voice still stuffed from crying. “Wanna go home?” You looked around and took Leon’s hand in yours. “Yeah”.

#leon kennedy x male reader #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x fem reader #resident evil #leon kennedy #leon kennedy angst #hurt/comfort #mitski #crack baby #angst

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