#falaffel

[mistyechoes]

dude I desperately wanna be like an acclaimed author who shows up in cosplay comments sometimes I think that would be so funny

[octuscle]

Hey Cronivac Support,

I dont trust myself with the settings so i am asking you. I am Half German and half Moroccan, and I look German af. Brown hair, brown eyes, big smile and a really white skin. I am thinking what would happen if my appearance were based on my Moroccan genes.

Can you help me out?

Brother, chill out! Have a shisha. Just ignore that there's German shit in your body. Your dick is circumcised. You pray at least once or twice a day. Friday you also go to the mosque… It doesn't matter if there are still German genes in you.

Thursday morning. You will survive the last school year at the Gymnasium. What comes after that, you don't know yet. Something with languages might make sense. Your mother tongues are Arabic, German and French. And you are actually quite good in English and Spanish at school. But you also enjoy science. First lesson today is chemistry. Stoichiometry. Actually very interesting. But somehow you have more and more problems to understand your teacher. When he approaches you, you start to stammer. You can't think of the right words. "Youssef, you are welcome to answer in English, if that is easier for you." You sigh in relief. German is really a difficult language. And even though you have a German grandmother, German was never spoken much at home….

During the break, you hang out with your brothers. Talk about soccer, cars, the usual stuff. Smoke an e-cigarette to go with it. And you make an appointment for the afternoon at the gym. Then it's off to the workshop at the vocational school. Metalwork. Hey, you're not training to be a car mechanic so you can mill toys out of metal plates. You want to become a car tuner. And create really hot cars. Your vocational school teacher is from Syria. Fled a few years ago. He speaks much better German than you do. You've only been in Europe for two years. Your mother had the French and the Moroccan passport, so you could immigrate relatively easily. But you didn't understand why you had to move to Germany. Some of your pals now live in Marseille. You would have found that cool, too… But Stuttgart? Just because your father found a good job as an engineer here at Mercedes? Anyway, you're a fighter, you'll survive Swabia.

Lunch is at the snack bar of a former colleague of your father. He has saved up enough money on the assembly line for his own snack bar. And now he makes the best falaffels in town. On weekends, you help out a little. You can always use the extra money. And that way you also get the food cheaper. Since you've been in training, you no longer get pocket money from your parents. You are the eldest son, you now have to do your share to feed the family. And if you are the first to have a vocational qualification here, your chances of getting a permanent right to stay are also the best. If only it weren't for this terrible language…

Gym, auto repair shop, vocational school, Gym…. Your daily routine is somehow always the same. Your boss is also a Muslim, from Turkey, so you have tomorrow afternoon off to go to the mosque. But you also have to work on Saturday. But you are grateful that you have the job. And you can afford your car and the gym. It was not easy to come to Europe. It cost your parents almost all their savings. And now it's your damn duty to succeed and support your family. For that you learn to be a car mechanic, for that you sell falaffel on weekends. That's why you mop the gym floors and clean the toilets at night. You even study German for that. However, this has already brought you a few thousand followers. Your picture from the last workout has 800 likes after just half an hour. Let's see, maybe new opportunities to become rich and famous will develop. You have the right gene pool!

Pic of your latest workout found @tufas

[izzyeffinhands]

“Izzy!! We should do plunder Fort…” Squints. “Dustier.” He pauses, then, and leans in. “Wait, no. It’s not— yes it is. Dustier. No, wait… Duister…” He spells it out, then scoffs. “Thought I might call it Fort Swiffer Duster. I mean, what kind of names are these anyway? Fort Picasso, Fort Greenbean..” Not the actual names, but that’s what they sounded like! “Falasie… how do you say that one again, Izzy?”

“ Falaffel. “

@avastyetwats

[liraspins]

MOJO'S COMFORT LIST

comfort food(s): Toasted toast with nutella or other chocolate cream on it, fried chickem burgers, falaffel kebab (also best hangover food i shit u not), tortellini

comfort drink(s): banana shakes, grape juice with water

comfort movie(s): the sword in the stone, big fish, Howl's moving castle

comfort show(s): Bojack Horseman, Naruto, Archer, Shameless, Drawfee Show, South Park, ATLA, Star Trek Voyager, Friends

comfort clothing: these baggy, light fabric pants...what are they called, goa pants? Laaaaarge sweaters, comfy hat, fluffy socks, just anything that is way too big for me. And converse.

comfort song(s): Dude...I am a music person. So I'll just list the songs I've been enjoying for the last like month or so. Prophets Hang and Wolf Womb by Holy Locust, Like spinning plates by Bella Ruse, just ALL of the Beatles, especially Rubber soul and Magical Mystery Tour, No Quarter by Led Zeppelin, Waltz #3 by Elliott Smith, All Shpongle and Den Sorte Skole albums.

comfort book(s): Ah, you got me. Music, yes. Books...man... The Golden Compass, Reckless, just anything by Terry Pratchett or Walter Mörs (even named my dog after one of his characters)

comfort game(s): Hearthstone, Sekiro, Deponia

tagged by: @chrislaplanteplan tagging: you! him! her! them! anyone!

[beesmygod]

Bea after eating falaffels and Adam innocently striking a match to light up the huge cuban cigars he so famously loves. 7 deaths recorded, more news at 11.

farting so bad the co2 meter goes off

[cuntstable]

my brother left a bunch of falaffel in tha freezer btw does anyone have suggetions on what to #eat it with

[reliquarian]

rotating falaffel with my mind. gimme that dry orb.

[xxslitmywrists666xx]

Im a big baba ghanoush boy

A real falaffel fella

[suedtirol2024]

Es ist die schönste Wanderung aller Zeiten! Das Wetter ist herrlich, die Landschaft ist grandios, die Wege sind wunderschön angelegt. Wir sind endlos begeistert 🤩 und sehen sogar Enzian - und nicht nur vereinzelt, sondern ganze Wiesen voll davon! Auf der Muttekopf-Hütte gibt es sogar ein paar vegane Gerichte und die Rote-Beete-Falaffel ist unglaublich lecker 😋

[borispfeiffer]

Genie

// von Boris Pfeiffer // Er merkt sich jede Stellung und spielt sie mit Vollendung weiter. Er ist der Besitzer meines Lieblings-Döner-Imbisses. Döner-Dürüm, Kalb, Hähnchen, vegetarisch, Falaffel-Döner, das heißt Dürüm in diesem Fall, mit scharfer Sauce, Kräutersauce, Knoblauch, ohne, mit Zitrone, mit Chilli, ohne, Salat, mit Bohnen, mit Mais, ohne, Zwiebeln ja, nein, Lahmacun, Ayran … Inzwischen…

[rainrho]

man who runs the local falaffel place told me about his secret spicier chili sauce and i feel like he personally put a medal round my neck and kissed my cheek

[allyhillsinstagram]

[theroamingvegan]

Hummus hummus hummus!!!

Tel Aviv Hummus House- Belgrade, Serbia🇷🇸

[cuntstable]

sweeties its time one onceagain to play the siiri lifesim :)

[thesilvershire]

No, YOU'RE eating it wrong!!!

You know this guy? Dan pashman?

He hosts a show called you're eating it wrong and I HATE IT WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING

Here, he shows a contraption to get your movie popcorn equally buttered

If you do that in a movie theatre, the person behind you in line is going to assault you.

In another episode, he makes a waffle out of falafel.

All fine and good. But what does he call it?

NO! THE MATERIAL COMES FIRST AND THE FORM COMES SECOND! THAT'S FALAFFEL WAFFLE!

But oh, the worst, the ABSOLUTE WORST is his pizza episode.

THE CRUST IS THERE FOR A REASON, DANIEL! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

THAT'S EVEN WORSE! YOU'RE GETTING THE TOPPINGS ALL OVER YOUR HANDS!!!!!