#exercising and having a protein shake instead LMAO

[lokh]

wow.... so the joy can be just being on the board......

[briarpatch-kids]

if you comfy with it, can you talk a little about your experiences with muscular dystrophy? i am suspecting it or something similar and just want to hear from people with it. ofc no pressure if too private etc!

Yeah, so basically I have mitochondrial myopathy which is under the muscular dystrophy umbrella because it causes progressive weakness and similar medical issues to muscular dystrophy, but it's not a "proper" one the way something like Limb-Girdle or Duchene are so your mileage may vary.

Growing up I always felt like I had to work a little harder than the other kids, I was always tired, and I'd get sick really easily and stay sick for a long time. I still was able to make up for things by sheer "you have no other option" willpower, combined with not being too sick yet.

I did well enough to pass military fitness tests at 18 and 19, but by 22 I had developed heart problems and dramatic exercise intolerance despite being very active. For years it looked like POTS and EDS to the point where I was misdiagnosed for a couple years. I was also having weird muscle twitches in my legs at night and the beginning of the muscle rigidity, but I thought it was just side effects from taking some hardcore psych meds when I was 20.

From there it kind of seemed like every time I'd get my shit together, horrible pain would set in and I'd start getting weird medical symptoms. Like, three months into it I'd be in 9/10 pain in my whole body, half delirious, and my whole body would be locked up in a muscle spasm. I once lost the ability to lift my arms over shoulder level for a month during finals week in college. That was a party.

The weakness is a lot more insidious, I thought it was the other medical symptoms until I got diagnosed. Because like, when your heart is beating at 180bpm, you need a sternum rub weekly to breathe from muscles locked, and you're swaying side to side while walking so hard you keep hitting door frames and bruising, you don't really notice that it's harder to get up and down than it used to. Or that maybe you're swaying side to side because you can't hold your whole body up reliably not because you're dizzy.

A lot of the other weakness related symptoms have been insidious. I have periods where I feel really tired and sluggish and like... Dim? Then I'd put on my CPAP for a nap and it would perk me back up. When we had a covid scare, my mother in law bought an oxygen monitor and it turns out during those times, my oxygen has been dropping to lower than what's healthy. (91-93 which is low enough to be concerning but not enough to need oxygen)

(EMETOPHOBIA WARNING) For the digestive issues it was more of the same, I just kind of lost my appetite, then it felt like I was "forcing food through" to keep things moving, then I started throwing up old food because my digestive system just kinda quit due to low power. Nowadays it's give or take, I can have a solid meal once in a while but I mainly live off milk watered down with coffee or protein shakes watered down with coffee. They're too thick without being thinned out and I'll be damned if I drink plain watered down Ensure instead of making a fancy coffee lmao (END EMETO WARNING)

A lot of it nowadays is realizing I can't go quite as far as I used to, meaning I can make it out, but I need help getting back. I'm trying to keep as much muscle as I can, but it can only really make you the strongest version of yourself rather than prevent muscle loss over time if that makes sense. I can push myself through a 3 mile wheelchair run, but I can't sit up reliably in my wheelchair without more support. Someday I won't be able to do the wheelchair runs, but when that happens there's powerchair football. (soccer)

[china-money]

hi first of all i rly look up to and adore u and ur blog!!! i hav a few questions for u if u dont mind? i see ur into nutritious cooking, so wen u wanna eat that cultural hunty food too, is there anywhere to find like healthy chinese recipes/make em healthier? even cn/tw yt'ers dont do much of that from wat i see .. and ik ur bf in med school undergoes a lot, do u think realistically one could find the time to cook and exercise throughout + after med school? tysm in advance!!

ty!!! mm the recipes I grew up eating at home are all pretty healthy - stir-fried wood ear, tomato & egg, braised eggplant, cold silk tofu w scallions, white fish w chilis in clear broth, egg drop soup, bok choy & shiitake, egg and scallion pancakes w mushu veg, etc. like its all really simple and homey and that’s what I personally think of as my ‘cultural’ food. you can find recipes online and dial down the salt/grease, substitute fresh chilis/chili powders for chili oil, substitute firm fish/chicken/tofu for proteins, and serve w more nutritious alternatives to white rice or noodles. my parents rarely cooked w red meat, sugar, or heavy sauces and when I’m not at home I have cauliflower rice, buckwheat noodles (instead of gua mian), shredded steamed cabbage, roast sweet potato etc instead of more traditional carbs

a lot of things I LOVE w flavors that u really can’t skimp on (like hunan, sichuan, chongqing dishes) I view as occasional treats (but I highly recommend fuschia dunlop’s every grain of rice if you’re looking for authentic and accessible sichuan recipes in english!!!!!!!!) I think unfortunately a lot of cn/tw food is just not that healthy like the food culture is so rich and delicious and beautiful but…it’s definitely a dionysian experience lmao and there’s nothing wrong w that 

umm…….jason doesn’t cook a lot lol he’s kinda living off protein shakes and  cafeteria food (heavily discounted, im jealous) and i cook for both of us. we’ve both went through months of eating sandwiches/oatmeal/frozen burritos so realistically I think cooking is always kind of a hassle and if u don’t love it it’s gonna be hard to make time for it. he works out religiously though LOL it’s like his only form of stress relief and I see his friends in the school gym all the time so dw you’ll def have time to build that ~physique~ lmao 

[notesfrombradleytobradley]

day three: sept 25

I woke up late as usual. I did not miss my 8 am but I didn’t wake up in time for a shower so I just washed my face. I went to my Global Environment class and had a really good session. I was informed and engaged.

 For the small break I have in between classes, I came home and dropped my bag off so that I could walk to Nat G’s for a small lunch. I grabbed a small beef black bean protein packed meal and a ginseng tea. Walked home and had my lunch while I waited around for my English class. I just watched a few episodes of Transparent when I could have been doing some work. 

My English class was alright, we got an email from the instructor last week but I foolishly thought that it was not applicable to me so I just ignored it. Anyway I find out today that I was suppose to resubmit the paper and did so immediately after she told me. (lol) I was hoping we were going to have some time to discuss the reading assignments from the weekend but she decided to do a review exercise so that she could give some extra credit to some of the kids who needed it. 

ANYWAY I share a table with this cute black guy. He always smells good and the second day he came to class he had on a shirt that said “why be transphobic, homophobic, misogynistic when you can just be quiet” (lmao his shirt) [i almost wrote his name on here but I gotta be smart about the online presence haha] soooo he needs some help with the exercise so I stay behind an extra 10 minutes to help him with it. He has a really velvet-y voice and some nice ass teeth.

suh anywayyyyy, I came home after class and fucked around for a bit, doing nothing. I grew restless so I decide to grab my work check while I’m waiting for my mom to arrive. I show up and wait for kelly to get there too so we can have a beer together. We eat and chill and my mom comes into town so we part. (she went to phoenix with lori) i walk to the parking lot to meet my mom.

We started arguing when she made it into town so I’m already annoyed with her. I get in and we argue more and I have a meltdown in front of her because of all the stress I’m carrying. I felt bad after we came back to each other and apologized. Sure i was upest with my mom but that doesn’t give me the right to lash out at her. I just need to find a way to express my emotions and release some stress. 

Anyway we reconcile and head to the bank so I can deposit my check and some money she gave me for rent. We got to savers to check it out and then head to Fry’s for some groceries and gas. We come back to my place and I say goodbye and bring everything in. I spend a couple hours watching Transparent before I go to the gym for a work out. 

I work out for about an hour then come home to drink a shake and shower. I just got out of the shower and admired myself (lmao) and now here i am writing this. I remembered that this was something I needed to do. 

I’m writing this instead of my proposal and Navajo paper haha. 

Today was definitely a roller coaster but I got through it and ended it with a work out. :) 

love yaself, bradley