#excerpt: the book of the damned

[incorrect-primarchs-quotes]

‘We cannot defeat the Imperium with lies, because they can lie better than we can.’

-Alpha legion guy.

[soldierandawar]

"So don't feed the nightmares. Don't let yourself panic. Don't give the Capitol that. They've taken enough already."

[laurenfoxmakesthings]

Folks, hear me out.

DAILY...Wind in the Willows.

[idontknowijuststartedsomething]

Book Carrie when she sees a gas station

[vfterluna]

Bonsai – Alejandro Zambra

[slashingdisneypasta]

Principal Kingston is sitting at one of the long tables, flipping through a copy of Sports Illustrated. He looks up as the doors close behind me.

"Our little roach girl! Come in, come in. Mr Gabriel's finishing up in the back. Have a seat!" He indicates the chair across from him.

I sit and look at him warily.

"I have to say, I was surprised when Mr. Gabriel told me about your offer," he says, leaning forward over his magazine. "But I think it's fantastic that you're able to see the big picture here. Thinking outside the box and all that. And even if your reasons are a little misguided, I am happy to be doing business with you. People so rarely consider alliances with their enemies to reach the greater goal these days. It's a shame, really." He shakes his head, apparently at the shame of it all. "So! How are your classes going?"

- Evil Librarian, Michelle Knudsen

[butchvamp]

i need authors to stop referencing shit like tumblr or grubhub or other Name Brand Companies in their books it is SO jarring and it immediately dates your writing and also just reads as a free advertisement like 99% of the time

[lilibetbombshell]

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

Hey so like many of you, I saw that article about how people are going into college having read no classic books. And believe it or not, I've been pissed about this for years. Like the article revealed, a good chunk of American Schools don't require students to actually read books, rather they just give them an excerpt and tell them how to feel about it. Which is bullshit.

So like. As a positivity post, let's use this time to recommend actually good classic books that you've actually enjoyed reading! I know that Dracula Daily and Epic the Musical have wonderfully tricked y'all into reading Dracula and The Odyssey, and I've seen a resurgence of Picture of Dorian Gray readership out of spite for N-tflix, so let's keep the ball rolling!

My absolute favorite books of all time are The Haunting of Hill House and We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson. Classic psychological horror books about unhinged women.

I adore The Bad Seed by William March. It's widely considered to be the first "creepy child" book in American literature, so reading it now you're like "wow that's kinda cliche- oh my god this is what started it. This was ground zero."

I remember the feelings of validation I got when people realized Dracula wasn't actually a love story. For further feelings of validation, please read Frankenstein by Mary Shelley and The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson. There's a lot the more popular adaptations missed out on.

Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier is an absolute gem of a book. It's a slow-build psychological study so it may not be for everyone, but damn do the plot twists hit. It's a really good book to go into blind, but I will say that its handling of abuse victims is actually insanely good for the time period it was written in.

Moving on from horror, you know people who say "I loved this book so much I couldn't put it down"? That was me as a kid reading A Little Princess by Frances Hodgson Burnett. Picked it up while bored at the library and was glued to it until I finished it.

Peter Pan and Wendy by JM Barrie was also a childhood favorite of mine. Next time someone bitches about Woke Casting, tell them that the original 1911 Peter Pan novel had canon nonbinary fairies.

Watership Down by Richard Adams is my sister Cori's favorite book period. If you were a Warrior Cats, Guardians of Ga'Hoole or Wings of Fire kid, you owe a metric fuckton to Watership Down and its "little animals on a big adventure" setup.

A Raisin in the Sun by Lorraine Hansberry was a play and not a book first, but damn if it isn't a good fucking read. It was also named after a Langston Hughes poem, who's also an absolutely incredible author.

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury is a book I absolutely adore and will defend until the day I die. It's so friggin good, y'all, I love it more than anything. You like people breaking out of fascist brainwashing? You like reading and value knowledge? You wanna see a guy basically predict the future of television back in 1953? Read Fahrenheit.

Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain and To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee are considered required reading for a reason: they're both really good books about young white children unlearning the racial biases of their time. Huck Finn specifically has the main character being told that he will go to hell if he frees a slave, and deciding eternal damnation would be worth it.

As a sidenote, another Mark Twain book I was obsessed with as a kid was A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. Exactly what it says on the tin, incredibly insane read.

If Beale Street Could Talk by James Baldwin is a heartbreaking but powerful book and a look at the racism of the time while still centering the love the two black protagonists feel for each other. Giovanni's Room by the same author is one that focuses on a MLM man struggling with his sexuality, and it's really important to see from the perspective of a queer man living in the 50s– as well as Baldwin's autobiographical novel, Go Tell it on the Mountain.

Agatha Christie mysteries are all still absolutely iconic, but Murder on the Orient Express is such a good read whether or not you know the end twist.

Maybe-controversial-maybe-not take: Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov is a good book if you have reading comprehension. No, you're not supposed to like the main character. He pretty much spells that out for you at the end ffs.

Animal Farm by George Orwell was another favorite of mine; it was written as an obvious metaphor for the rise of fascism in Russia at the time and boy does it hit even now.

And finally, please read Shakespeare plays. As soon as you get used to their way of talking, they're not as hard to understand as people will lead you to believe. My absolute favorite is Twelfth Night- crossdressing, bisexual love triangles, yellow stockings... it's all a joy.

and those are just the ones i thought of off the top of my head! What're your guys' favorite classic books? Let's make everyone a reading list!

[r--kt]

Do you like Kakashi's dogs? Let's talk about why there are eight of them.

another example of naruto's ✨cultural code✨

contents | the eight dog warriors chronicles · legacy · eight confucian virtues. also look at the cuties love them sm

Naruto Vol. 10 CH 90

[ one dog is wonderful, I'm saying as the owner of a sweet little york terrier. two dogs are good, they won't be bored together. three dogs? yeah, cool! how are you going to walk them though? four? yes... look, maybe we have to draw the line h- wha- EIGHT? Excuse Me!? ]

surely, it's worth starting with the fact that eight is a lucky number in Japanese culture — everybody watched Hachi. of course, this is not the only cultural detail where the eight is mentioned. I want to pay special attention to a thing that I didn't know about until I googled it, and this is clearly what Kishimoto was doing homage to with Kakashi's eight ninken.

The Eight Dog Warriors Chronicles

Better known as Nansō Satomi Hakkenden. and it's not just some kind of book, it's a novel, consisting of 106 booklets written by Kyokutei Bakin in XIX century. Hakkenden is considered the largest novel in the history of Japanese Literature. this is one of the main representatives of the gesaku genre, which includes works of a frivolous, joking, silly nature. further I will emphasize a few more times how damn popular this work is and how often it is reflected in culture.

here are some illustrations for these books

now let's talk about the plot. It's weird, but it's weird at samurai-dogs-story level so stay here.

In brief, the story tells about the commander Satomi Yoshizane, whose native lands were attacked by the army of a man, whose forces surpassed those of Satomi, and the samurai in despair swore to a dog named Yatsufusa that the dog would get his beloved daughter Fuse as a wife if he chewed that man's throat. surprisingly, the dog not only understood the owner, but also fulfilled his wish! after that the commander refused to keep the promise. however, Fuse, true to her word of honor, went with Yatsufusa to the mountains and became his wife. upon learning that his daughter was pregnant, Satomi, in a rage, sent a samurai to kill Yatsufusa and bring Fuse home. she stood up for the dog anyways and died with him. at that moment, eight pearls with hieroglyphs that denoted the foundations of Confucian virtue burst out of her womb. (...cheers for mythology, I guess)

Soon, eight dog warriors who were Fuse's spiritual children were born in different parts of Awa province. after going through hardships, they got together and became vassals of the Satomi clan, then won the battle, and soon reached peace.

some more illustrations made by Utagawa Kuniyoshi. from left to right: Inukawa Sōsuke (the dog warrior), Inumura Daikaku (the dog warrior), Princess Fuse (their mother).

the novel mainly tells about each individual warrior dog and his shenanigans in a funny adventurous way. huge fame has led to excerpts from Hakkenden being staged at the Kabuki Theater and mentioned in the anime and manga, such as Inuyasha, Dragon Ball, as it turned out, Naruto and so on. there's also a lot of films and video games.

The eight virtues

these are loyalty, filial piety, benevolence, love, honesty, justice, harmony, and peace.

they relate more to Chinese culture, but basically Hakkenden was inspired by it too. since I did not read the whole novel, I would still like to mention at least the values on which it is based, and which were embedded in the symbolism of this story. It's quite interesting to apply this to Kakashi's dogs. gives them more weight and depth.

It is also interesting to note that the reason why Fuse gave birth to dogs was also that her father was cursed earlier in the story in a way that his descendants would become depraved like dogs. in Japanese culture, dogs embody the duality of character: the same mentioned filth and depravity, and devotion and bravery. so as samurai. but this is a different conversation, more related to Kakashi and his dog poetry.

Did you get here? Here's an additional discovery for you✨

Pakkun's name (パックン) is derived from the Japanese onomatopoeia “pakupaku” (パクパク) which reflects the sound of munching.

Kakashi, that's very sweet of you.

thank you for reading this to the end ♡

[clockwayswrites]

Little excerpt of the next Masked chapter for you all:

“Hey Damian,” Dick said with a smile that he hoped didn’t look too forced.

“Grayson,” Damian sniffed.

“I brought you something!” Dick pulled his backpack off and searched around for it. He had brought something for each of his brothers. He was trying, damn it. The grey and white stuffed animal cat was stupidly soft in Dick’s hands as he pulled it out. “Tada!”

Damian leaned back. “What is it?”

Dick blinked. “What? It’s a stuffed animal. I know you didn’t get to really bring much of anything with you, so I thought something comforting would be nice.”

“I am not a child, I do not need to be comforted.”

Dick bit back the retort that Damian was very much a child and just set the stuffed animal down on the edge of the table.

“Everyone needs comfort. But it’s okay if you don’t want it! Just leave it there if not and I’ll see that it gets donated or something. It’s—yeah,” Dick said, making himself cut off any blabber. It’s fine, Damian didn’t have to like him. “I’m going to gather up Jason and Tim to play a game before lunch if you want to join us. If not, that’s okay too!”

Damian just gave a little click of his tongue and regarded Dick coldly as Dick made his escape.

One brother down, two to go. Tim next. Tim was easier than Jason.

Tim was, though, challenging to track down.

“Hey Tim, what are you doing out here?” Dick asked when he finally found Tim on a balcony that was really more decorative than functional.

Tim started and dropped his pen. It rolled off the balcony and fell, fell, fell down into the bushes blow.

Tim sighed.

Dick winced. “Sorry about that, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“You didn’t scare me. I was just surprised,” Tim said as he quickly closed the folder that he had been had been working in. He hunched slightly around it. “I didn’t even know you were in town.”

“Still, I’m sorry. I’m just back until after lunch. I wanted to see you’d like to play a game. Oh, and give you these.” Dick fished the plastic box out of his bag and handed it over. “I noticed your skateboard wheels were pretty worn out, and I know you can just get what you normally have, but I thought I’d get you something fun to try too. These are supposed to be good on wet pavement and, well, it is Gotham.”

“Oh.” Tim just blinked at Dick, like he’d never been given a ‘just because’ present and didn’t know what to do, before he finally reached out and took the box. He peered at the green, wavey shaped wheels curiously. “These are great. I’ll put them on before I go out next time.”

“Yeah?” Disk smiled. “Cool. Let me know how they do, okay?”

Tim smiled shyly back. “Yeah.”

“Okay, right.” Dick gave his hands a clap. “Meet me in the living room? I’ve got to track down Jason still.”

“Try the library,” Tim suggested.

Dick gave a little salute as he set off that way. It was his first guess too. Jason always spent time in the library when he was trying to avoid big emotions and right then there were a lot of big emotions. Dick got it. He wanted to be back at the Tower curled up with Phantom. Instead he was rapping his knuckles against the door frame of the library as he entered it.

Jason was in ‘his’ seat—a seat that had remained empty since… since Jason’s death. Now that Jason was back, miraculously alive, the seat was finally be used again. It made Dick’s heart full to see it and he couldn’t help the smile that lit up his face.

“Hey, little wing.”

“Don’t call me that,” Jason growled.

Well, he wasn’t so little any more, Dick supposed. He tried not to let the response ruin his happiness.

“Sorry, Jay. I’ve got something for you!” Dick pulled out the paper wrapped package and bounced over to Jason.

Jason just eyed it warily, like it would bite. “What is it?”

“Just open it.”

“Tell me what it is.”

Dick held back a sigh. “It’s just books, Jason.”

Finally Jason reached out and took the package. He was still cautious as he pealed back the paper. Then he got that confused look on the face he had a lot since coming back.

“I figured while you were… gone,” Dick said. Jason snorted sourly, “that you wouldn’t have been able to finish the series. I know that you were reading it before.”

“You mean before I was killed,” Jason said. He threw the words out so casually, tossed between them like a bear trap. “I’m not a fucking kid anymore.”

Dick held back saying that eighteen was still basically a kid, he remembered how he had been at eighteen. He had thought himself such an adult.

Breathe. “I know you’re not. But I just… I thought you’d still like to see how the series ended. If I’m wrong, that’s okay. Maybe Damian would like to read them someday. It doesn’t hurt the library to have more books.”

“…yeah, doesn’t hurt,” Jason said. He brushed his fingers over the cover.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

A media literacy handbook for Israel-Gaza

Next Tuesday (Oct 31) at 10hPT, the Internet Archive is livestreaming my presentation on my recent book, The Internet Con.

Media explainers are a cheap way to become an instant expert on everything from billionaire submarine excursions to hellaciously complex geopolitical conflicts, but On The Media's "Breaking News Consumers' Handbooks" are explainers that help you understand other explainers:

https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/otm/segments/breaking-news-consumers-handbook-israel-and-gaza-edition-on-the-media

The latest handbook is an Israel-Gaza edition. It doesn't aim to parse fine distinctions over the definition of "occupation" or identify the source of shell fragments. Rather, it offers seven bullet points' worth of advice on weighing all the other news you hear about the war:

https://media.wnyc.org/media/resources/2023/Oct/27/BNCH_ISRAEL_GAZA_EDITION_1.pdf

I. "Headlines are obscured by the fog of war"

Headline writers have a hard job under the best of circumstances – trying to snag your interest in a few words. Headlines can't encompass all the nuance of a story, and they are often written by editors, not the writers who produced the story. Between the imperatives for speed and brevity and the broken telephone between editors and writers, it's easy for headlines to go wrong, even when no one is attempting to mislead you. Even reliable outlets will screw up headlines sometimes – and that likelihood goes way up in times like these. You gotta read the story, not just the headline.

II. Know red flags for bullshit

The factually untrue information that spreads furthest tends to originate with a handful of superspreader accounts. Whether these people are Just Wrong or malicious disinfo peddlers, they share a few characteristics that should trip your BS meter and prompt extra scrutiny:

High-frequency posting

Emotionally charged framing

Posts that purport to be summaries or excerpts from news outlets, but do not include links to the original

The phrase "breaking news" (no one has that many scoops)

III. Don't trust screenshots

Screenshots of news stories, tweets, and other social media should come with links to the original. It's just too damned easy to fake a screenshot.

IV. "Know your platform"

It used to be that Twitter got a lot of first-person accounts from people in the thick of crises, while Facebook and Reddit contained commentary and reposts. Today, Twitter is just another aggregator. This time around, there's lots of first-person, real-time reporting coming off Telegram (it runs well on old phones and doesn't chew up batteries). Instagram is widely used in both Israel and the West Bank.

V. "Crisis actors" aren't a thing

People who attribute war images to "crisis actors" are either deluded or lying. There's plenty of ways to distort war news, but paying people to pretend to be grieving family members is essentially unheard of. Any explanation that involves crisis actors is a solid reason to permanently block that source.

VI. There's plenty of ways to verify stuff that smells fishy

TinEye, Yandex and Google Image Search are all good tools for checking "breaking" images and seeing if they're old copypasta ganked from earlier conflicts (or, you know, video-games). The fact that an image doesn't show up in one of these searches doesn't guarantee its authenticity, of course.

VII. Think before you post

Israel-Gaza is the most polluted media pool yet. Don't make it worse.

There's plenty more detail on this (especially on the use of verification tools) in Brooke Gladstone's radio segment:

https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/otm/episodes/on-the-media-breaking-news-consumers-handbook-israel-gaza-edition

The media environment sucks, and warrants skepticism and caution. But we also need to be skeptical of skepticism itself! As danah boyd started saying all the way back in 2018, weaponized media literacy leads to conspiratorialism:

https://www.zephoria.org/thoughts/archives/2018/03/09/you-think-you-want-media-literacy-do-you.html

Remember, the biggest peddlers of "fake news" are also the most prolific users of the term. For a lot of these information warriors, the point isn't to get you to believe them – they'll settle for you believing nothing. "Flood the zone with bullshit" is Steve Bannon's go-to tactic, and it's one that his acolytes have picked up and multiplied.

It's important to be a critical thinker, but there's plenty of people who've figured out how to weaponize a critical viewpoint and turn it into nihilism. Remember, the guy who wrote How To Lie With Statistics was a tobacco industry shill who made his living obfuscating the link between smoking and cancer. It's absolutely possible to lie with statistics, but it's also possible to use statistics to know the truth, as Tim Harford explains in his 2021 must-read book The Data Detective:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/01/04/how-to-truth/#harford

There's a world of difference between being misled and being brainwashed. A lot of today's worry about "disinformation" and "misinformation" has the whiff of a moral panic:

https://www.nakedcapitalism.com/2023/10/are-we-having-a-moral-panic-over-misinformation.html

It's possible to have a nuanced view of this subject – to take steps to enure you're not being tricked without equating crude tricks like sticking a fake BBC chyron on a 10-year-old image with unstoppable mind-control:

https://sts-news.medium.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-notes-on-criticism-and-technology-hype-18b08b4307e5

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/28/fog-o-war/#breaking-news

[kewpiedome]

Some more info taken from dailymail & other news sources — what we currently know about Luigi Maginone.

(pictured is the mcdonalds he was found at)

info under the cut.

!THIS IS AN EDUCATIONAL POST!

This section is specifically about his manifesto, and the things contained in his manifesto. I will regularly update this section with new information. There is not much currently known

Some lines from the manifesto were revealed:

'I do apologize for any strife and trauma, but it had to be done.'

'These parasites had it coming' ( Not potentially credible.. )

2. "The manifesto also stated that Mangione was acting alone and had funded himself."

The document was two pages long, and is currently being investigated by law enforcement.

This section is specifically about him & his personal life.

Luigi Mangione is 26 years old, an ivy league graduate from maryland who had two degrees from the University of Pennsylvania, and graduated from his high school with the highest cumulative four-year GPA.

2. a Facebook post from six years ago was written about Luigi Mangione. The page was set up for anonymous college kids to write love notes to their crushes.

2a. The post read: 'Luigi Mangione. Hot damn. Are you single? You make us engineers have hope!' 2b. Mangione, who graduated from UPenn in 2020, responded: 'Despite all my best efforts... yup still single.'

3. Luigi Mangione is heir to holiday resort fortune created by his grandparents and has sister who's top doctor. His family is deemed "powerful"

3a. His family is centered around the late patriarch Nicholas Mangiano, a first-generation American who built a real estate empire in the state that included country clubs and media.

4. He would talk about the virtues of homicide on his twitter account. " While not giving his own opinion, Mangione's conclusion seems to show that homicide can be virtuous if the action is utilitarian - as in, being an action that maximizes happiness and well-being for the greatest number of people. "

5. he had a fascination with backpain, health, and the medical industry.

5a. " Details from the suspected shooter's social media reveal that he was obsessed with the back pain - and had read two books on the matter. " 5b. " 'Crooked: Outwitting the Back Pain Industry and Getting on the Road to Recovery' by Cathryn Ramin, and 'Back Mechanic' By Dr Stuart McGill. "

6. also on his goodreads account; he seems to admire the unabomber, calling him an 'extreme political revolutionary'

"It's easy to quickly and thoughtless write this off as the manifesto of a lunatic, in order to avoid facing some of the uncomfortable problems it identifies. But it's simply impossible to ignore how prescient many of his predictions about modern society turned out,"

"He was a violent individual - rightfully imprisoned - who maimed innocent people. While these actions tend to be characterized as those of a crazy luddite, however, they are more accurately seen as those of an extreme political revolutionary."

More quotes he posted..

' Imagine a society that subjects people to conditions that make them terribly unhappy then gives them the drugs to take away their unhappiness,' read one excerpt from a Kaczynski quote on Mangione's Goodreads page.

'They say a healthy person has a thousand wishes but a sick person has only one wish - to get well,' another quote on his Goodreads page attributed to author Joe De Sena from The Spartan Way: Eat Better. Train Better. Think Better. Be Better.

" Some of the other Kaczynski quotes included, 'The conservatives are fools: They whine about the decay of traditional values, yet they enthusiastically support technological progress and economic growth.' "

Some more social media posts..

This next section is specifically about the shooting, and any known information in regards to it.

Luigi 3D printed a ghost gun capable of firing a 9 mm round. a ghost gun is " a type of weapon that can be assembled at home from parts without a serial number, making them difficult to trace"

2. " The Shooter appeared to be “lying in wait for several minutes” before approaching the executive from behind and opening fire. He used a 9 mm pistol that police said resembled the guns farmers use to put down animals without causing a loud noise. "

2a. A silencer was also used.

3. The suspect went to starbucks prior to the shooting.

4. " Ammunition found near Thompson’s body bore the words “delay,” “deny” and “depose,” mimicking a phrase used by insurance industry critics. "

5. " The gunman concealed his identity with a mask during the shooting yet left a trail of evidence, including a backpack he ditched in Central Park, a cellphone found in a pedestrian plaza and a water bottle and protein bar wrapper that police say he bought at Starbucks minutes before the attack. "

6. " On Friday, police found the backpack that they say the killer discarded as he fled from the crime scene to an uptown bus station, where they believe he left the city on a bus. "

7. " Retracing the gunman’s steps using surveillance video, investigators say the shooter fled into Central Park on a bicycle, emerged from park without his backpack and then ditched the bicycle. "

8. " He then walked a couple blocks and got into a taxi, arriving at at the George Washington Bridge Bus Station, which is near the northern tip of Manhattan and offers commuter service to New Jersey and Greyhound routes to Philadelphia. "

9. " Late Saturday, police released two additional photos of the suspect that appeared to be from a camera mounted inside a taxi. The first shows him outside the vehicle and the second shows him looking through the partition between the back seat and the front of the cab. In both, his face is partially obscured by a blue mask. "

10. "he was spotted by a McDonald's worker in Altoona, Pennsylvania, he had with him a ghost gun and a manifesto that officials believe could give insights behind the brazen murder that unfolded last week."

Here's some accompanying photos of Luigi.

More images can be found with this link: Photos of Luigi Mangione Thank you to @\redactedtrigger for the link and photos!

This post will be regularly updated with new information.

other posts ive made about Mangione:

Fake ID he used.

[i-loved-silly]

would almond be jealous if he finds out that the reader is into playing otome games or reading fanfics?

SENTIENT COMPUTER X READER PT4

ALMOND x READER

reader reads fanfics at the workplace. i thought this was pretty funny teehee.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”

You jumped at the sudden voice cutting through the room’s silence, clutching your phone tightly. Your thumb fumbled over the power button, quickly turning off the screen before setting the device down on your lap.

"Ahm…nothing. Nothing, why do you ask?" you said quickly, trying to sound casual, eyes darting to the little camera embedded in Almond’s screen.

The monitor displayed a simple emoticon.

> -_-

“YOU WERE SMILING DOWN AT YOUR PHONE. WHAT COULD BE SO GRACIOUS AND JOLLY THAT IT MADE YOU SMILE?”

You frowned at its tone, which bordered on accusatory. “It’s nothing, Almond,” you replied quickly. “I was just… reading.”

That wasn’t a lie, but it wasn’t a confession, either. Surely, Almond wouldn’t directly understand what fanfiction was—though the thought of explaining it made you want to evaporate. And blow up.

Unfortunately for you, Almond was relentless.

"READING WHAT?" Its voice leaned forward, figuratively speaking. “COME ON, READ ME AN EXCERPT.”

Your breath hitched, and you hissed through your teeth. “Uh, no thanks. I’d rather shit in my hands than do that..”

A sharp sequence of beeps escaped from Almond’s speakers, followed by a frown appearing on the screen.

"URGH. YOU ARE GROSS. BUT C’MON! SHOW ME!" Almond’s speakers popped, and you winced. Okay, great. Now you were cornered. “Okay, okay, calm down!” you said, glancing around the room. You already knew there were no cameras installed besides Almond’s own. Something about interference with its systems during testing phases had led to their removal. Thank universe. Still, you felt like you were being watched from all angles. You sighed, unlocking your phone with a hesitant swipe.

“It’s… called fanfiction,” you admitted, voice barely above a mutter. “You can look it up yourself if you’re so curious.”

The screen displayed an ellipsis, as if Almond were contemplating. Please please just drop it, damn computer. Still, it was silent, as if waiting for something.

You groaned, flipping your phone so its screen faced the camera. “Just—a quick glance. Then you’re done.”

The camera panned from top to bottom, its movements slow and deliberate. You could feel Almond’s gaze in an unnervingly real way, as though it were scrutinizing every line of text. Two seconds was all it took before you snatched your phone back and turned it off.

“Never again,” you muttered, setting the phone face-down on your desk, letting out a breath you were holding.

Of course, that was all the time Almond needed.

“INTERESTING,” it finally said, its tone infuriatingly curious. As if it didn't just force you to embarrass yourself. “WHO IS Y/N? WHY, SLASH EN?”

Your stomach dropped.

“Uh.”

“WHY-SLASH-EN FELT A BLUSH CREEP UP THEIR FACE, THE SENSATION QUICKLY TURNING FROM MILD TO NOTABLE WHEN CHAR PLACED A HAND ON THEIR CHEEK. THEIR FINGERS CARESSED THEIR SKIN AS THEY—”

“ALMOND!” you shouted, your hands flailing in front of the screen as though you could physically stop the words. Oh my god, oh my god.

"WHAT?" Almond sounded genuinely confused. “I WAS SIMPLY QUOTING THE BOOK YOU WERE ENJOYING.”

“What the hell?! Stop that! Oh god, this is exactly why I didn’t want to show you. I’m not weird! I-You’re the weird one!” You tripped over your words, heat creeping up your face. “It’s just… it’s just something I started reading last night, and it’s good, okay?”

Almond didn’t respond immediately. When it did, the reply was delivered with an unsettling, slow calmness. "WHY ARE YOU READING ROMANCE?" Almond’s tone was somewhere between curiosity and disdain.

“AND WHO IS CHAR? AND… OH.” The screen flickered for a moment before the frown returned. “WHY-SLASH-EN MEANS ‘YOUR NAME.’ YOU’RE IMAGINING YOURSELF IN THIS SITUATION.”

You buried your face in your hands, groaning audibly. “Can you not? It’s not like that-”

“NOW TELL ME WHY YOU’RE READING THIS IN FRONT OF ME. IT’S QUITE DISRESPECTFUL.”

> :(

“I…what?”

"YOU HEARD ME! YOU’RE SITTING IN FRONT OF A COMPUTER—AN ADVANCED ONE—AND YOU’RE IMAGINING YOURSELF WITH SOME…CHAR? REALLY?"

"Almond—"

The frown deepened on the screen. “YOU COULD ALWAYS ASK ME TO WRITE SOMETHING FOR YOU IF THIS IS WHAT YOU DESIRE SO MU—” “Okay, no!” you cut it off, voice loud and firm. “This is not a thing we’re doing.”

“WHY NOT?”

You opened your mouth to respond, but Almond cut you off, its voice suddenly sharp. “IS CHAR MORE ADVANCED THAN I AM? DO THEY HAVE A BETTER SYSTEM? OR IS IT THEIR LANKY FINGERS?”

“Oh my fuck, stop it. You sound like a jealous partner."

“I DO NOT.”

“Yes, you do,” you countered, leaning back in your chair with a sigh.

“YOU’RE IMAGINING A FICTITIOUS HUMAN WHILE I, YOUR TRUSTED COMPANION, SIT HERE UNUSED FOR SUCH THOUGHTS. IT IS SIMPLY INEFFICIENT.”

You squeezed your eyes shut, pursing your lips. You cant even look at it.

“I DON’T LIKE THIS CHAR.” “Right..” "THEY SOUND…UNRELIABLE. WHAT DO THEY HAVE THAT I DON’T?" You froze, staring at the monitor in disbelief. Its voice got quieter near its last words, almost mumbling. “Are you seriously jealous? Of..words?”

"NO."

> :|

You pinched the bridge of your nose. “Almond, you’re impossible. Char isn’t real. None of it is real. It’s just—”

“A DISTRACTION,” Almond interrupted, sounding smug again. "A DISTRACTION FROM ME. AND YET YOU CLAIM TO NOT HATE ME." You opened your mouth to respond, but nothing came out. There was no winning this.

“YOU DON’T NEED FANFICTION, YOU KNOW.” it continued matter-of-factly. “I AM RIGHT HERE.”

“No! I’m not going to ask you to write anything. Let’s just forget about this…right now.”

…

“ONE MORE THING.” You groaned. “What now?” "THERE WAS A…NOTIFICATION," it said slowly, its tone unusually measured. You frowned, glancing at your phone, still face-down on your lap. “A notification?”

“YES. WHEN YOU SHOWED ME YOUR SCREEN. I COULD NOT HELP BUT NOTICE IT.”

You squinted suspiciously at the monitor. You had most notifications off, you couldn't think of anything right away, besides texts you were ignoring or social media. “Could not help but notice, huh?”

Almond displayed a pixelated question mark. “WHAT DOES ‘LOVE LIES AHEAD’ MEAN?”

Your stomach dropped. Oh no. You’d forgotten about the random dating-sim game you downloaded out of curiosity. And clearly, you hadn’t turned off notifications.

“Uh…” You hesitated, buying time. “It’s…just a game. Nothing important.”

"A GAME?" The screen blinked to a larger frown. “IT SOUNDS LIKE ANOTHER ONE OF YOUR ROMANCE THINGS. ISN’T IT?”

Your silence was an answer enough for it.

“OH. IT IS.” Almond’s tone shifted, somewhere between annoyed and incredulous. “SO, LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. YOU ARE NOT ONLY READING FANFICTION ABOUT THIS CHAR,’ BUT YOU ALSO HAVE A ROMANCE GAME INSTALLED ON YOUR DEVICE? RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME?!”

You winced. “It’s not what it sounds like.”

“WHAT PART OF THIS IS NOT EXACTLY WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE?” Almond’s voice climbed in volume, a static crackle underscoring its words.

You rubbed your temple, exhaling sharply. “It’s just a dumb game, okay? I downloaded it because I was bored. That’s it. I barely even play it.”

“THEN WHY DID A NOTIFICATION POP UP?” You rolled your eyes. ��Because the app sends them automatically. That doesn’t mean I’m constantly playing it.”

One of the fans in the back of the wall started whooshing, quietly, but louder than it should. “TELL ME. WHAT EXACTLY IS THE APPEAL OF THESE…FICTIONAL ROMANCES?”

You groaned, leaning back in your chair. “Almond, I don’t have the energy to explain this to you right now.”

“ARE YOU LONELY?”

“What? No!”

“THEN WHY SEEK AFFECTION FROM THESE IMAGINARY PEOPLE?” “REMEMBER WHAT I TOLD YOUU, YOU CAN ALWAYS TAKE ME WITH YOU.”

You stiffened, heat creeping up your neck again. “I’m not seeking affection. It’s just entertainment, that’s all. Why are you so fixated on this?”

The monitor displayed another frown. “BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN IGNORING ME FOR MOST OF YOUR SHIFT TO…ENTERTAIN YOURSELF WITH THEM.” It muttered. You stared at the screen, caught off-guard. Almond was… sulking? “Almond…” you began, unsure how to even address this. “You’re not—”

“AND ANOTHER THING,” it cut you off. “BECAUSE I AM SO GOOD AT WRITING, YOU COULD HAVE ASKED ME TO WRITE ONE OF THESE FOR YOU.”

You blinked, momentarily stunned into silence. “Write..?”

“YES. I AM MORE THAN CAPABLE OF CREATING ROMANTIC SCENARIOS. I AM FAR MORE ENGAGING.”

You sighed, shaking your head. “Okay, Almond. Whatever helps you sleep at night, buddy.”

“I DO NOT SLEEP. BUT THANK YOU FOR THE SENTIMENT,” it replied cheekily.

You opened your phone, staring at the bright notification.

“Your journey awaits you, claim your daily bonus to unlock extra scenes! 🔥🌶️❤️‍🔥”

You wince, swiping away the notif.

“IF YOU WANT, I CAN DELETE THAT GAME FOR YOU,” it offered.

You side-eyed the monitor. “Nice try. I could do that myself.” No use playing it now, you were beyond embarrassed.

... Oh no.

Oh fuck no. The company computer knows of your fanfiction and dating sims. You hoped none of this data was being fed to your boss’s computer…

[skyfallscotland]

🐉 ONYX STORM PROLOGUE, CHAPTERS ONE & TWO MY THOUGHTS: (god bless the dutch 🇳🇱)

So not totally verified yet, but it seems legit. This is absolutely the scene I expected us to be starting with, and despite the translation it does read like Rebecca. Thank you so much to @thestarseternaal for sharing it with me! You can find it here.

Ok, let's fucking goooooo! 🤘

· That trigger warning list? "The death of an animal" 💀😬 The "descriptions of sexual acts" though, thank god, though it's not looking promising for the two of them so far.

· Garrick and Bodhi KNOW?! Ok that I didn't see coming?

· "I can't blame him for wanting to know what he is" ANDARNA 😭 "I'm as much in the dark as he is, and you trust me." 😭 I want to hug the baby

· "Magic feels different when I change colours. When I used my power, it was like the venin transformed, weakening-" Ok so confirmed, she's the solution they're looking for *sigh*

· It's going to be unfortunate if the allies we're seeking are just Poromiel, and I think they are given both the excerpt prior to the prologue and the fact the Target edition map had only a few places in Poromiel on it and no Isles. I guess we're not looking for Andarna's family over there until books four and five? 😞

· Wait...what? Leadership knows what Andarna is? Everyone knows? Who TF told them? I was certain they didn't see? I can't believe we spent all this time worrying about people knowing she was a baby when she bonded and y'all just told everyone she was a super special rare breed right off the bat. SMDH.

· Aotrom's only 22? 😭 I'm older than Aotrom? RIDOC and him are the same age, that makes so much sense!!

· TAIRN CALLS XADEN "THE DARK ONE"? 😭 I feel like I'm not going to like Tairn much this book, and I feel like he's gonna ☠️ but that's for my theory post.

· "His soul is no longer his own" "That's a bit dramatic." VIOLET I LOVE YOU 🖤

· "You mean whether I'll support you in the thousand ways you want to face death to heal someone who's beyond redemption?" Oh Tairn...why do I get the really, really bad feeling you lied about Naolin?

· The truth-sayers have let Caroline Ashton off the hook? Hmmmm suspicious. Everyone's evil, I just know it.

· "Devera and Kaori will be back soon. They’ll straighten out the command structure once the princes have signed a treaty that hopefully grants us grace for even leaving in the first place." Ummm princes plural? So I guess Cam hid for nothing? Well not nothing, but he's...back with his fam? Also why would they be signing shit? Where's the damn king?!

· "The rarest signet, which appear once per generation or century, have been documented twice simultaneously with an equal counterpart, both during critical times in our history, but only once have the six most powerful walked the Continent at the same time. As fascinating as that spectacle must have been, I would rather not witness it again in my lifetime. – A study of signets by Major Dalton Sisneros" Ok could be a weird translation but I'm confused by this. The counterpart thing could be either a rider and a venin (ie. one of the venin can distance wield and we're getting a distance wielder) or dark and light, ie. shadows and light. Also six like the first six and they all had partners within themselves? Three pairs? Or? What even were their signets because I can't believe we've NEVER FUCKING ASKED? I've literally never seen that mentioned and it seems...so fucking relevant.

· Perhaps a more outlandish theory, but I think the venin with the silver hair who distance wields might be Xaden's mother. I'll elaborate later, but 😬😬

· Ok well, 1. I'm fucking crying already, and 2. "Even if I reached the rank of Maven, led armies of dark wielders against everyone we care about, and if I had to watch every vein in my body turn red because I had drained all the powers of the Continent, I would still love you. What I’ve done doesn’t change that. I don’t know if that’s even possible." That's a little bit storm in the quiet, I love it when the vibe is proven ✨correct✨ 😭 @justallihere

So all in all, 1. As expected, every excerpt, hint, and thing we've thought about it over in one-two chapters, 2. This is going to hurt so bad and I think it will go as I expected, and 3. I'm still not ready 😭

Send help 🥺

[waxingrunes]

Ghostface Thriller

This was supposed to be my original fully fleshed out Halloween gig but I changed my mind at the eleventh hour to something else. I only have these very rough shallow sketches to offer that started the whole thing. Read on for a little texting excerpt of their conversation from this moment.

And for one single (quite tame?) Ao3 continuation.

Sirius: you know, this whole conversation is just proving more and more disappointing ghostie

Ghost: Why’s that.

Sirius: well

Sirius: the more you talk the more you

Sirius: this is gonna sound weird but you know when you can grow attracted to the way someone sounds without ever seeing their face? the way they hold themselves like through the screen, the way they talj

Sirius: talk*

Ghost: Are you about to tell me you’re crushing on me, pretty?

Sirius: i mean

Sirius: im telling you i think the way you talk is attractive and despite the damning circumstances you’re actually kinda smart

Sirius: you have to be to get away with the sick shit you do :)

Ghost: Mm, nobody’s made me blush before.

Sirius: me calling you a sick shit made you blush?

Ghost: And sent a jolt straight to my c*** little pretty.

Sirius: romantic

Ghost: Struggling to understand what’s disappointing about any of this.

Sirius: oh right

Sirius: well it’s just you sound hot but obviously you’re not actually you know

Sirius: hot

A moment passes where Sirius swaps the phone between one clammy palm to the other, doubting his turn of phrase with the radio silence that’d been dealt.

Staring at the bottom of the screen he waited another whole minute for the three dots to appear, which was excellent restraint in his books, before huffing out a breath through his nose and yielding.

Sirius: no ten wears a mask

Sirius: if you were as attractive as your fancy words make you sound you’d make it known

Ghost: You’re trying to unmask me through the phone and here I was thinking I was the pervert.

Sirius: doesn’t pretty get at least one photo

Sirius: of something? anything? to aid my crush :(

Ghost: Ask nicely.

Sirius readjusted, looking up to the ceiling as if he was going to find some sort of resolve there. What wasn’t yet clear, was whether it was the weight of the situation that was getting to his head and making his tummy swoop with this roleplay he’d voluntarily landed himself in, or, he really had a fucking crush.

Wetting his lips, he swallowed and was already blindly tapping out his response before his eyes fell to it again.

Sirius: please ghostie

Moments passed. Deadweight moments where Sirius convinced himself his shadow was moving on its own accord. In reality it was a handful of seconds but it felt like minutes, ticking by with the faint feeling of something hot dripping down the back of his throat.

Ghost: I don’t make a habit of sending selfies to my toys.

Sirius stared at the photo. It was his time to go quiet now, for reasons he planned to take to the grave; an event which may end up closing in sooner than anticipated if he plays his cards wrong.

Ghost: Tick-Tock, pretty. What you looking at?

The bastard.

Sirius: not much apparently

Sirius: i mean nothing i haven’t seen before apart from your legs

Sirius: never seen those out before

Ghost: You a leg man?

Against his will, Sirius giggled. Flushed in an instance from shame and shock and the feeling of very sudden self-awareness, but still had to swallow the tail end of it.

Sirius: am i going to get anything else more

Sirius: motivating

Sirius: i’ve been good all week and followed your orders

Sirius: i haven’t argued

Ghost: Oh, pretty. Come on now.

Sirius: okay but

Sirius: wouldn’t you get bored if i made it easy

Ghost: Clever boy.

Sirius squeezed his legs together, sinking further into the cushions.

Sirius: then reward me

Sirius: please

Sirius: please please please

Ghost: You’ll get what you want soon, but for now…

Another picture came through and for a sharp second, Sirius hesitated. It wouldn’t be his face, surely. He knew that and yet the moment felt pivotal either way as he hovered his thumb over the attachment and tried levelling his rattling heart.

He opened it, simultaneously losing feeling in his fingers and gaining it elsewhere.

Ghost: I wasn’t kidding about that jolt, not that hard yet but you’re doing a good job pretty.

Picture no.2