#except for maybe the one friend who SAW me break down & cry at the sight of my ex at club fair last year
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nunyverse-scribe · 11 months ago
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I need to graduate high school already so that I can be at peace with the fact that I will never have to hear abt my ex-girlfriend ever again.
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lucerystargaryensblog · 2 years ago
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title:Hate to love
Modern lucemond
732 words
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Today was supposed to be a good day for lucerys he woke up and decided to be happy
Let get into why he decided to be happy
Lucerys and aemond was a couple for about 3 months and the school had decided to have a prom
They was having a great time till a drunk cunt came and talk to aemond
They was very drunk and loud so when one of them yells
ARE YOU GONNA END THAT BET TONIGHT I WANNA HAVE A TRY AT THEM.the drunk cunt says
Lucerys look at aemond with realization
No-no he doesn’t mean that he just drunk.Aemond says
Lucerys heads for the stairs and aemond catches up to him as they reach the top.
Would you give me a chance… lucerys cut him off
You had a bet to take me out from one of your friends i knew this was a set up
Luke it wasn’t like that,okay
Really? What was it like? A down payment now and a bonus sleeping with me?
No i didnt care about the bet or the money okay? I cared…i cared about you
Lucerys turns to him with a amount of sadness and anger
You are so not who I thought you were.
In desperation, aemond grabs him and kisses him. After a second, lucerys jerks away and flees down the stairs and out of sight.
The next day at school
Otto stands at a podium and faces the class with an open book in front of him.
All right. I assume everyone has found time to complete their poem. Except for Mr.Targaryen...
Otto begins to laugh very pleased . Baela sulks at his desk behind a pair of sunglasses.
..who has an excuse. Baela, lose the glasses. Otto says
He removes the sunglasses and everyone laughs but lucerys
Alright. Anyone brave enough to read theirs aloud
No one moves. Then lucerys slowly raises his hand
I will.. Lucerys says
Here we go He signs
Lucerys stands and walks to face the class. he clears his throat before reading from his notebook.
I hate the way you talk to me And the way you cut your hair.I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare.I hate your big dumb combat boots And the way you read my mind.hate you so much it makes me sick.It even makes me rhyme.
He pauses then continues
I hate it...I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh; Even worse when you make me cry.
He begins to cry but continues to read
I hate it when you're not around And the fact that you didn't call,But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you;Not even close; Not even a little bit;Not even at all.
He looks at aemond he looks back but morose,thoughtful
He walks out the room and everyone is stunned
In the parking lot
Students are leaving and lucerys walks towards his car
When he opens his door he is greeted with a fender strat(guitar)that aemond saw lucerys playing in a store before
He picks it up slowing and inspecting the details
Aemond leans in behind him
Nice huh? He says
A Fender Strat? Is this for me?
Lucerys says
Yeah. I thought you could use it. You know, when you start your band. Besides, I had some extra cash, you know. Some asshole paid me to take out a really great boy.
Lucerys start smiling
is that right?
Yeah, but I screwed up. I, um... I fell for him.
Really lucerys says
It's not every day you find a boy who'll flash someone to get you out of detention.
lucerys looks Surprised and embarrassed about the flashing
Oh,god..
He laughs and aemond takes that as i sign to kiss him but lucerys pulls away suddenly
You can’t just buy me a guitar every time you screw up,you know
Aemond winces
Yeah, I know. But then, you know, there's always drums and bass and maybe even one day a tambourine.
He kiss lucerys again which he breaks again
And don’t think you can…
Aemond shut him up by kissing him,not letting him finish
Instead of posting the ten things I hate about you story on here I had put it on my wattpad (yuri Aizawa) and deleted it on here
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im-no-jedi · 10 months ago
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OMG I almost forgot to write down my dream from last night haha
featuring appearances from @jam-n-ham and @knight-tyme because they’re my freaking sisters and all that
putting it under a cut cause this is REALLY detailed 😂
so I was on vacation with my family at Disney World (which I often have dreams about), and we were staying at Animal Kingdom Lodge (like we always do). except unlike the real hotel, which keeps the wild animals FAR away from the buildings, our room was RIGHT up against the fake savanna, so the animals would literally come up to our windows. we even had a fenced off “yard” that we could walk out to and see the animals if we wanted. the dream started on the day we were supposed to go home though, so we were in the process of packing up.
however, it wasn’t just my family who was on this trip. for whatever reason, our long deceased dog was with us (I often have dreams about him, but never us taking him to Florida with us LOL). he ironically was fine whenever we let him out into the yard, so long as there weren’t any animals nearby at the time. we also had a bunch of young kids with us, who I think were supposed to be friends of my bro and little sis (who had de-aged into their 10-12 year old selves)?? we had a REALLY big hotel room apparently LOL. oh, and best of all… Hunter and Crosshair were there too. not any of the others, just the two of them. now, I’ve had dreams with just Hunter in them before as he’s been my go-to dream boyfriend for a while now. but the fact that Crosshair was there too was unusual. I would’ve figured maybe Echo and/or Omega would be there, but nope, it was Crosshair.
anyway, like I said, it was the last day of our trip, and everyone was packing up. I was in the middle of doing my makeup when I saw that there was a family of giraffes near one of the windows. I got really excited and called my dad over so we could take pictures of them. then I noticed something off to the side of the window, staring at us. it was a cheetah. literally just sitting next to the window being a creep and watching me and my dad photograph these giraffes. my dad said it was weird that the cheetah wasn’t chasing the giraffes, but to not worry about it (btw they don’t have cheetahs at the real hotel, only on the safari ride, far away from other animals LOL).
as dad and I are photographing the giraffes, Ham comes by to let the dog out to go to the bathroom. we tell her there are giraffes outside, so he probably shouldn’t go out, but she said he wouldn’t bark at the giraffes, so it was fine. and yeah, he was ok with the giraffes.
however.
we forgot about the cheetah.
the cheetah comes prowling out from its hiding place and starts walking around in plain sight. our dog sees a giant kitty and starts barking at it, to no surprise. now remember, this entire little yard attached to our room is fenced off, honestly more like a giant cage, with two layers of wire blocking us from the animals. even the cheetah couldn’t get through if it tried to. but our dog, our sweet anxious dog who only liked to chase squirrels and possums, somehow found a weak spot in the fence and managed to climb through it and into the savanna.
we all FREAKED OUT.
Ham was screaming at the dog to come back, several of the kids started crying, and my mom immediately called the front desk to let them know what happened. Hunter legit was ready to run out and catch the dog himself, but I stopped him.
in all this chaos, we failed to overlook something. if the dog was able to get out… then that meant other things could get IN.
sure enough, in her panicked state, Ham had left the back door open, with that break in the fence now larger than it was before. our dog was nowhere in sight… but large kitty growls could be heard from down the hall.
without hesitation, both Hunter and Crosshair ran off to go catch the cheetah while the rest of us hung back to protect the kids. we saw them chase the cheetah around for a bit before running back into the hall again. Hunter eventually came back and said he’d somehow lost track of it and figured it might’ve run back outside. then I asked him where Crosshair was, and he said that he thought Crosshair was right behind him the whole time…
then suddenly Crosshair comes out from the hallway, slowly, and with a malicious look on his face. his eyes suddenly turned slitted, and his mouth opened to reveal sharp teeth. he let out a low, feline growl.
he’s somehow gotten POSSESSED by the cheetah????
Crosshair quickly started chasing some of the kids around the room, on all fours like a cheetah. he lunged at me at one point, but Hunter was able to get him off me before he bit me. Hunter tells me and my family to get the kids to safety while he tries to wrangle Crosshair. Ham and I took the kids into one of the large rooms and shut the door so they can stay safe (my parents stay with them too).
then I went back to the two boys cause I wanna see what’s happening, but Ham stayed by the door where everyone else is. I return just in time to see Hunter wrestling with Crosshair (kinda similar to what happened on Kamino LOL). Hunter kicks Crosshair off of him, and Crosshair growls before lunging at Hunter again, but Hunter punches Cross hard enough that the cheetah gets completely knocked out of him, anime style. the defeated cheetah then humbly ran out back to the savanna again, while Crosshair was left on the floor in a sad, guilty state. he was pretty depressed for the rest of the time after that, distancing himself from everyone. a few of the kids comforted him later, saying it wasn’t his fault, and I about cried 🥺
the dream ended with several of us getting in our car to go look for our dog. we drove around for a bit to discover that several other dogs had gotten loose too, which was weird. we eventually found our dog running across the road, and Hunter offered to go catch him. but little sis (who is only about 10 at this time) said she wanted to do it and ran out of the car before anyone could stop her. I kid you not, this binch squatted down and stalked our dog exactly like Hunter would’ve; he and I just looked at each other like 😒 (although I could tell he was proud he rubbed off on her like that haha). once little sis carried our dog back into the car, the dream ended.
y’all I’ll never be able to look at Animal Kingdom Lodge the same way again ROFL
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xoxo-teddybear · 4 years ago
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The Bakugou Kids - Bakugou Katsuki
(Dad)Bakugou x (Mom)f!reader
Warnings: Fluff, Crack, Cursing
Summary: Bakugou and Y/N love their son with their entire beings, but sometimes, parents need a break. Especially when those parents are responsible for creating a literal demon spawn. He is kind, well behaved, and cute of course! But he does have Bakugou blood in him. With Y/N already away on a girls trip, Bakugou has to find out how he’s going to deal with his (now) many, many kids.
A/N: You passed down your duplication quirk down to Katsuo.
BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST
“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” You asked your husband as you stood at the doorway. “Katsumi may be a calm baby but she’s still a baby. And Katsuo’s quirk just kicked in and it is mine. I would know how difficult it can be to manage.”
“Stop worrying, Babe. It’s just a duplication quirk. And he’s only 5, how powerful can it really be?”Katsuki said, wrapping his arms around you. “Just go on your little girl’s trip with Ponytail and Racoon Eyes. I can handle the brat.”
You looked at your husband with a raised brow and smile before rolling your eyes and giving him a kiss. “Alright then. I’ll see you in a few days!”
With that, you walked out of the house and into the cab to meet your friends at the resort. Katsuki chuckled before walking back into the house to find his son napping on the couch. His spiky, blonde locks were all messed up with bed head while his E/C eyes he inherited from you remained shut. Katsuki walked over to his newborn daughter and picked her up while he took a seat next to Katsuo’s sleeping form, rubbing at his soft hair until he woke up.
“Can’t be all that bad, right Katsumi?”
The baby girl merely cooed with sparkling ruby eyes that mimicked her father’s.
Wow. Wrong. He was so wrong! It had only been 2 days since your departure but things had already gone so wrong! When you said your quirk was difficult to manage, Katsuki thought it would be difficult for Katsuo to manage. Not him!
Katsuki should’ve known his son would’ve taken the opportunity to act out while his mother was away. He had always been your little angel while Katsuki saw him as his little gremlin. With Y/N gone, Katsuo has been pushing all kinds of limits. Limits that had Katsuki beat.
Katsuo had been fortunate enough to inherit a quirk. And not just any quirk, but your quirk. Duplication. Basically, he can create copies of himself. When you were his age, you could only create 4, max. Katsuo was different though. He had Bakugou blood flowing through him. He was advanced the second he was born. So now, Katsuki was stuck looking after Katsumi, Katsuo, and Katsuo’s 16 other copies.
“Aye! Number 15, you’re gonna break that lamp! 11 and 8! Don’t wrestle in the mud! Go take a bath! NUMBER 3 GET OFF THE KITCHEN ISLAND! KATSUMI!” The adult blond screamed, looking for his infant daughter, eventually finding her sleeping in her little rocker on the living room floor. “Oh right, you don’t talk yet.”
Katsuki sighed as he slumped down next to his daughter, and leaned his back against the couch. He looked around the room and saw the 17 Katsuo’s making a ruckus around the house. All he could do was question how the hell is 3 month old daughter could possibly sleep through all this.
Katsuki almost lost all hope for humanity until a knock was heard on his front door. Knowing exactly who was there, he quickly got up from his place on the floor and ran to the entrance. “You idiots are finally here!”
Katsuki pulled in his 3 friends, the boys of the Bakusquad, and slammed the door shut. The 3 friends all stood in shock at the sight of the house. Not that it was overly messy or anything. It’s just that there were about 16 more figures in the house that aren’t usually there.
“You gotta help me!” Katsuki said, running infront of them, shaking his best friend’s shoulders. “I love my kids! I do! I love Katsuo, I swear! BUT I DIDNT SIGN UP TO BE A FATHER OF 18 FREAKING DEVILS!”
“Okay! Okay, relax man. We’re here.” Kirishima said, patting his friend’s shoulder as he wept. “How the hell are we gonna take care of 17 little Bakugous?”
“Right? We thought 1 Kacchan was a lot. Then you brought another one into the world, who apparently brought some unannounced friends.” Kaminari joked.
“They’re demons!” Katsuki exclaimed. “This has to be some fucking Karma for the shit I did. I knew I should’ve listened to my old hag better. Now shits came back to bite me in the- HEY! PUT YOUR SISTER DOWN! SHE’S NOT A FOOTBALL!”
Katsuos number 7 and 5 placed a sleeping Katsumi back in her rocker with an annoyed pout before running off to play something else.
“Welllll, there’s nothing that 3 cool uncles can’t fix!” Sero enthusiastically said. “Hey kiddos! Who’s ready to have some fun?”
All the mini blondes stopped their movements, some freezing mid-air, and looked to the slim man. They all shouted in joy at the sight of their uncles and ran to pounce on the 3 men, including their father. From the point of view of the boys in the Bakusquad, it looked like a Bakugou stampede.
“Run, run, RUN, RUN, RUUUNN!!!!” Kaminari screamed as the boys all ran for their lives to escape the herd of Katsuos. This was going to be an interesting day.
Safe to say after the day had passed, the boys of the Bakusquad were completely exhausted. Sero had half his clothes torn, Kirishima’s hair fell from it’s great spikes and even lost some red hues, Katsuki’s eye bags had never been heavier, and Kaminari was just straight knocked the fuck out. They were all thrown across the couch as Katsumi rested in Katsuki’s arms.
“What do we do?” Kirishima exclaimed.
“I don’t know.” Katsuki said, looking at his scrambling son(s). “There’s just too many.”
“And we’ve already lost a soldier.” Sero said pointing to Kaminari’s sleeping form. Katsuki and Kirishima followed his gaze and bowed their heads in respect towards the defeated Kaminari.
“Well now what? Is Bakugou just supposed to live like this for the next 3 days?” Kirishima asked.
“Hell no. If I do, there’s not gonna be anymore Katsuki. I’ll just be some body without a soul because my damn gremlins sucked it outta’ me.” Katsuki said with his head dropped down.
“Well how do we get them to calm down?” Sero questioned.
“I don’t know. They’re all mini me’s. Nobody could get me to relax.” Katsuki said in defeat, but that’s when Kirishima had a lightbulb go off for him.
“Except for Y/N!” The red head said, popping up from his seat on the couch.
“Uh, if you haven’t noticed Shitty Hair, this all started because she’s away on her trip.” Katsuki said with sarcasm as he looked at his friend as if he was an idiot.
“I know that! But Y/N wasn’t the only one to tame you, Bakugou!” Kirishima said in excitement.
“So then who else?” Katsuki asked.
“You know,” Kirishima smirked. “Denki’s favorite person. Y/N and.........”
It took Katsuki a second before his eyes popped when he finally got it. “No!”
“Yes!” Kirishima said.
“No way! We’re not going to her!” Katsuki complained.
“Who?” Sero asked.
“Nobody!” Katsuki screamed.
“Oh it’s somebody alright! Somebody who was able to tame the beast in Bakugou the second he was born!” Kirishima said.
“Who?” Sero asked. Katsuki finally sighed before he gave in, realizing this was his only hope for sanity. He grabbed his phone and made a quick call before explaining to his dark-haired friend.
“The demon of all demons...”
The door opened to reveal a tall standing brunette and an elder feminine blonde.
“...My mother.”
The boys of the Bakusquad all sat lined up on the couch as Mitsuki stood at Katsuki’s end and smacked her son’s head.
“You idiots! Y/N leaves for 2 days and all hell breaks lose?!” Mitsuki screamed at the 3 young men.
“You old hag! Quit hitting me! Ima’ grown man for crying out loud!” Katsuki screamed as he rubbed his head. Masaru simply bounced the sleeping Katsumi in his arms as he watched the scene play out.
“Well if you’re such a grown man then why can’t you manage your own kids without your wife’s help?!” Mitsuki argued, leaving Katsuki silent as he grumbled. The eldest blonde sighed before continuing. “Alright listen, I’ll watch these little devils for the next few days until Y/N comes back. I’d love to spend some time with my grandbrats. Why don’t the 3 of you go take a break and-“
“THANKS! Let’s go losers!” Katsuki said dragging his friends to the exit. Mitsuki and Masaru only laughed at their son’s behavior as they began tending to the kids.
The boys of the Bakusquad all quickly walked out of the house and headed for their cars as they all walked together.
“So, where to?” Sero asked.
“We could go head up that new resort in Tokyo!” Kaminari suggested.
“Naahhh. That’s where Y/N’s having her girl’s trip. Wifey would kill me if she saw me there instead of at home with the kids.” Katsuki said with his hands in his pockets. Kirishima raised his brow at this.
“Oh? So then, maybe we should go back and-“
“You know, on second thought,” Katsuki said with wide eyes once Kirishima made the suggestion. He took his hands out of his pockets and placed them behind his friend’s backs to keep them moving. “Maybe she won’t kill me..if I’m lucky..and wish..upon a shooting star....a million times over. Hah.....yeah. TO THE RESORT!”
As they walked, Kaminari attempted to look at the house once more, prompting Katsuki to turn his friend’s head back around. “No, no, no, don’t look back, they can smell fear.”
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somewhatgreatexpectations · 4 years ago
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Set You Free (Wanda Maximoff/ Reader)
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Hello friends!
Once more, double Lizzie!
Buckle up... it's a bumpy ride. :)
The sight of your ceiling etched itself permanently in your mind because that was all you were capable of doing. Staring at the ceiling. Wasting away. The concept was much more appealing than the decision that awaited you when the sun rose over the horizon.
Regardless of what you did you’d be breaking the heart of someone you loved. You had to face that.
Your own heart be damned. You’d break yourself a hundred times over if you believed for even a second that it would spare them.
Except you knew it wouldn’t. You knew that even not making a decision would be making a decision. Your heart thudded anxiously against your sternum at the thought, the deafening sound ringing in your ears.
The words they’d both said playing over and over in your mind. Every touch… every kiss.
All of it spinning rapidly in your mind until you were sure that no other thoughts would ever be capable of existing there ever again.
__________________
It had been twenty-four hours since you slept, give or take, and it took everything within yourself to drag your body out of bed and into the shower as a last-ditch attempt of clearing your mind.
It didn’t work. Of course, it didn’t.
Why would it?
After getting dressed, you took a deep, calming breath hoping that even for just one second the world would stop spinning and you would be able to focus your thoughts.
Again, it didn’t work.
Without thinking, you grabbed your keys and left the seclusion of your home. You needed to do something, not just wallow in your own agony and hope the answers would appear out of thin air. They deserved more than that. They deserved effort.
When you arrived at your destination, your hands trembled with each step you took up the familiar path. You clenched them into fist just for the sake of eliminating the issue.
Everything was amplified as you willed your hand to raise and knock on the door. The knock against the door reverberated through your sleep deprived mind. When the door swung open and your eyes met hers, you felt the tension drain from your shoulders. Even if it was just a bit.
“Wanda.” You breathed out, leaning into her automatically, sighing contently when her arms wrapped tightly around you.
You could vaguely feel her pull you into her apartment. “Y/n, you look exhausted. Did you sleep at all?”
Shutting your eyes, you hummed against her shoulder. “What time is it?” You asked dazedly.
“8 am.” She replied wearily.
Her fingers soothingly running through your hair almost lulled you to sleep until you heard her call your name again. “Oh. Right. No, I didn’t.”
The feeling of her gentle touch on your cheeks forced your eyes open again as you met her worried eyes. Those gentle eyes that you’d come to live for. “Moya lyubov’. You need to sleep. Come with me.”
Every movement felt disconnected from your body as the lack of sleep finally caught up to you. Wanda gently guided you over to the bed you had spent dozens of nights comfortably tucked into. The feeling heaven sent as she pulled the comforter over your shoulders.
You felt cared for. Loved.
“Wanda?” She hummed. “Can you stay with me?”
There was no response and for a moment you were sure she had left until you felt the warmth of her body gently turn you on your side as she crawled into the bed behind you. The familiar feeling of comfort overcame you as you felt her arms wrap tightly around your midsection and pull you close.
The scent of sandalwood invading all of your senses and the soft sound of her humming in your ear was the last thing your mind processed before you drifted off into a dreamless slumber.
When you opened your eyes again, you saw the sun significantly lower in the sky than when you had first arrived. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you made your way out of the warmth of Wanda’s bedroom and into the cold of the kitchen where you found the other woman at the stove.
The sight was familiar. Soothing.
“Wanda?” You called out, your voice still thick with sleep.
She spun around to face you, her eyes widened slightly in surprise, but the smile on her face was warm. “Good morning, Krasivaya. Well... afternoon I suppose. I was wondering when you’d finally wake up.” She said lightly.
You wandered over to her and rested your head on her chest as her arms wrapped easily around your waist. “Is that hot chocolate?”
Her lips pressed lightly against your hairline. “It is. I thought you could use a pick-me-up.” You smiled lightly with the ease of the moment. The ease of being with Wanda. The ease of… Everything.
“What time is it?” You eventually asked after allowing yourself to relish in the peace for just the briefest moment.
You could feel her lift her wrist to her face. “It’s just about to be 5. You slept for nine hours.” Her body shook slightly with her giggle and you couldn’t help the way your lips quirked up at the sound. Until you remembered what that time meant.
“I… I have to go.” You mumbled, stepping back awkwardly.
Wanda’s smile faltered, and your chest clenched at the sight. “I understand.”
You pressed a soft kiss to her lips, lightly brushing your thumb along her jaw.
When she pulled back and looked at you with a mix of love and pain you knew you couldn’t lose her. The thought alone terrified you.
With one final kiss, you turned and made your way to your car.
Love was supposed to be easy. With Wanda it was easy. It always had been. Falling in love with Wanda was as simple as breathing. You couldn’t lose that.
The racing thoughts in your mind made the drive feel like it passed in seconds. Your heart was anxiously pounding against your rib cage, and you were sure it was moments away from beating right out of your chest.
A selfish part of you wished that it would because then you would be spared from having to hurt someone.
Glancing at the clock on your dashboard, you saw it was 6 which meant there would no more opportunity to avoid the inevitable.
It was time to face the reality of what was about to happen.
The steps you took down the path felt never ending, each movement heavy. Heavy to complete, heavy on your heart. The situation felt familiar though, as if you had tread this path before.
The further down the path you walked, the more you became sure that the path would be something you could never come back from. You would never be able to change the outcome.
When you finally reached the clearing, you found her, and you couldn’t help but think back to all the moments that you had spent here with her before. The happy moments. The moments before life caught up to you both. A place of happiness.
A place that had originally started out as yours, until you realized that everything that was yours was hers too.
Leigh’s smile when she saw you made your heart clench, but you kept moving forward. You found yourself unable to stop yourself from smiling back at her. Especially since this might be the last smile she would ever give you. You wanted to curl in on yourself at the thought alone.
“How do you even remember this place?” You asked, still surprised that she was able to find you in a place you hadn't been to together in years.
Her shoulders lifted slightly in a small shrug. “Because I spent the last two years coming here when life got too much.”
Your breath hitched with her words. “Why?” You asked even though you weren’t sure if you wanted to know the answer.
“Because it always reminded me of peaceful times.” She laughed slightly. “Looking back now, I guess I would just come here and hope in the back of my mind that one day you’d be sitting under this tree like you used to when we were kids.”
For a moment you let the words wash over you because even if you didn’t say it out loud, that was why you found yourself seeking out this former place of comfort as well. “Leigh…”
Her smile fell when you finally met her gaze. The eyes that were shining happily just moments before were now filled with tears. Your heart broke at the sight. You couldn’t do anything to make her feel better though because you were the cause.
You caused her pain.
“It’s her.” She whispered, her voice thick with emotion. It wasn’t a question. You didn’t have to say anything. Leigh knew you well enough to know where you stood without words.
She sounded like she was about to cry, then she took a breath and it was gone. “I’m setting you free, Leigh.” You murmured passed the lump that had formed in your throat.
“Maybe I don’t want you to set me free, Y/n.” The response was quick. Like the slipping of words that weren’t intended to see the light of day. Her sharp intake of breath confirmed that. The words dug deeply into the furthest crevices of your heart, making the world around you darker as you fought to push down the emotions that they evoked. “Did you love me too?”
The silence that hung in the air was heavy with words left unspoken. Heavy with emotion that pressed down on your chest like bricks. “I did love you, Leigh. Beyond words. And I think… I think that sometimes you loved me too.” You eventually said. Your words were quiet, as if they were a secret meant just for you two. You kicked absently at the leaves beneath your feet to distract yourself. “We were just never able to get our timing right. And maybe that was a sign.”
A weak chuckle filled the air around you. “I didn’t love you sometimes, Y/n. I loved you always. Even when I didn’t say it. Even when you walked away... Even when I walked away” The tears that fell burned a path down your cheeks as you quietly listened to her. “We didn’t lose each other because of time. I think we lost each other by waiting for the other to admit that we were in love... Two soulmates who could never find each other even when we were standing right in front of each other.”
Your heart fragmented and you could feel the broken pieces hammer in your chest. “Leigh-”
“You know, I may not have been daylight for you… But you were my moon and stars… And when you left you took them with you. You were my light in darkness. I’m sorry that I turned off the light.”
The air became razor blades around you as it became impossible to breathe.
You couldn’t find it within yourself to meet her eyes. “I’m sorry, Leigh.” She didn’t respond, and you didn’t expect her to. “I’m so sorry.”
A tense silence hung in the air as though you were both trapped in limbo. Both terrified to move. To let go.
“Do you regret it?” You asked softly, the words so quiet you were certain they barely reached her ears.
Your heart thudded in agony when she refused to look at you. “Do I regret what?”
“I don’t know.” Your voice shook. “Everything.” Leigh was quiet for a long moment and you could feel heat burn the skin of your cheeks. You knew you should have left well enough alone.
Just as you opened your mouth to apologize to her for asking, she finally said, “Just because we didn’t work out doesn’t mean that you weren’t the best thing that ever happened to me… Because you were.”
“Yeah.” You said thickly, feeling the tears prickle in your eyes. “You, too.” You wanted to tell her that you wanted to fight for her, but you didn’t know how. You wanted to tell her of the fear that had become a permanent fixture in your heart. You wanted to tell her that it wasn’t her fault.
The battle had felt like it was lost long before it had even begun.
Instead you said nothing.
Leigh stepped closer to you, her eyes glazed over with unshed tears. “One last kiss.”
Your hand found her cheek as your palm slid against her skin. You nodded and pressed your lips to hers.
Soaring.
That’s what it always felt like when she was pressed against you like this. You felt the rush of helplessness, and a surge of emotion that filled you with warmth and she clung to you as if you were the only solid thing in this dizzying world.
Her mouth was insistent against yours and you could feel the shake of her lips that sent tremors through every nerve ending in your body. You slowed the kiss down. You needed to remember this. Everything... Before it was gone for good. Like how sweet her lips tasted even over the salty tears that fell from your eyes.
The kiss goodbye lasted years in your mind, yet it still wasn't long enough.
Then she stepped away and the spell was broken. You dazedly allowed your fingertips to brush away the stray tears on her cheeks even if they were replaced with fresh tears a moment later.
“I won’t love you forever, but I’m terrified I might. I won't stand in your way though” Leigh whispered, the words against your lips, sending chills down your spine. “Goodbye, Y/n.”
Before you could say anything, she pulled away, her hand slowly trailing down your arm until it stopped at your fingers. You could feel her lightly squeeze three times before she turned, and you quietly watched her walk away.
Every word stolen from your lips because what could you say? You had made the choice. When she had disappeared in the distance, your gaze fell to the grass where she had just stood and couldn’t help but ache.
Losing her was one of the worst things you could face, but you survived it once before. Loving her was a worse pain. It had to be.
You knelt slowly in the grass, the weight of the situation forcing you to your knees. When you attempted to stand again, you couldn’t move. It was as if the grief you felt changed everything within yourself entirely.
If this was what you wanted, why was it killing you inside to let her go?
___________________
Wanda shifted slightly in your arms and you tightened your hold around her, pulling her closer. Always pulling her closer. You could see her shift closer to you in her sleep and you couldn’t help but smile slightly at the sight.
You glanced at the clock to see the time glaring brightly back at you. 6 am. You hadn’t slept well in the last three days, but you didn’t want Wanda to know that. She would just worry.
Eventually, you were able to fall into a fitful sleep as the sun began peeking over the horizon.
The door opened, and you forced an unconvincing smile on your lips. “I did it. It’s over.” You said quietly.
Wanda just stared back at you with her brows furrowed in concern. “Are you okay?”
“I’m okay.” You mumbled as Wanda let you inside.
The concern never faded from her features. “You don’t have to pretend to be. It’s okay if you’re not.” Wanda said cautiously, her arm wrapped around you.
As if she said the magic word, the fake smile crumpled, and you felt the tears begin welling in your eyes. Wordlessly, she pulled you into her arms. You melted into the embrace, bunching your hands into the front of her sweater as quiet sobs fell from your lips. “I choose you, Wanda… but it hurt to let her go.” You whispered through tears.
With a start, you opened your eyes to the bright room, groaning when you saw how late in the afternoon it was. Even though you shouldn’t have, you closed your eyes again. The world was dull. And you couldn’t get out of bed.
You should be happy. So why weren’t you?
After another hour in bed, you knew you couldn’t avoid it anymore. Using all your willpower, you rolled out of bed and made your way to the bathroom. Forcing yourself through the motions as you brushed your teeth, showered and got ready for the remainder of the day.
It wasn’t until you looked in the mirror that you stopped. In the mirror your eyes met your own and you could hardly recognize yourself. You forced a smile, quickly dropping it when you realized how unbelievable it looked. You sighed.
The feeling was reminiscent to the night of the wedding. Only this time you made the decision. You made this choice. You loved Wanda. You wanted to be with Wanda. She was your daylight. You loved her. You just needed to get out of this rut.
The mantra looped in your mind as you made your way downstairs and into the living room. You smiled slightly when you saw Wanda curled up on the couch, an old sitcom playing on the screen in front of her.
“Hey.” You said, getting her attention, before you took a seat next to her. “What are you watching?”
She smiled back at you, but it was soft. Sad even. “I think we should break up.” Wanda replied suddenly, ignoring your question.
“What?’ You sputtered in shock at her words. If your heart wasn’t already broken, you were sure it would have been now.
Wanda reached a hand over to soothingly stroke your cheek. “Y/n. I love you.”
You placed your hand over hers to keep her there. To anchor yourself. “If you love me, why are you leaving me?”
A sigh fell from her lips as a single tear rolled down her cheek. “Because you made the wrong choice.” She whispered.
Her thumb soothingly running along your cheek bone did nothing to ease the chaos in your mind. “What do you mean? I lo-”
“You’re not in love with me.” Wanda interrupted quietly. “I know that we would be happy, and I can see us spending the rest of our lives together… but you weren’t meant for me.”
Tears prickled your eyes as you stared helplessly into the beautiful emeralds that you’d come to adore. “I choose you though, Wanda. I want you.”
The tears that fell down her cheeks made you want to scream. You never wanted to hurt Wanda when all she had done was love you, yet you had still managed to do it anyway.
“Who you want and who you need are sometimes two different people.” She said sadly. “It would be selfish of me to keep you when I know your heart is with Leigh.”
You gently wiped away her tears. “But Wanda, I-”
“I’m setting you free, Y/n.” The words hit you and you recoiled slightly. She licked her lips as she seemed to contemplate her next words. “I’m setting you free because I love you and I don’t want you wonder what could have been if you had actually listened to your heart. I’ll be okay.”
All you could do was collapse into her chest, the tears flowing freely and feeling like they would never end. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” You repeated until your voice was horse.
The tears the fell onto your neck made you weep more as Wanda stroked your hair. Both of you allowing yourself to relish in the embrace. As much as you tried to fight the knowledge, Wanda was right. It was Leigh. Even if you desperately wished it was Wanda, you couldn’t change the composition of your heart.
You loved Wanda, but you’d never be able to match the love she gave you. Not when the vast majority of your heart would always be in the hands of another as long as you were breathing. It wouldn't be fair.
Two years away just taught you how to muffle the way your heart still screamed out her name.
After what must have been an hour, Wanda pulled away, her eyes still distraught. “Remember that night when you said that we can chose what to define ourselves as?” You nodded slightly, your mind drifting to the night you spent together looking at the stars. A fond memory. “Don’t let yourself be defined by your fear… As much as it breaks my heart to say this, go get her. Let yourself be defined by love. Don’t let the end of us be in vain.”
You swallowed thickly. “I do love you, Wanda.”
She smiled weakly at you. “I know. I love you, too.” Wanda pressed a soft kiss to your forehead and you closed your eyes at the contact. “I should go now.”
When you opened your eyes, your heart clenched in your chest at the sight of her. The sight of her pain. “I’m sorry, Wanda.” You repeated again.
She shook her head slightly. “I’ll be okay.” As she made her way to the front door, she turned to face you. “Learning to forgive ourselves and others because we haven’t chosen wisely is what makes us human. We make mistakes. You and Leigh have made mistakes. Don’t let the fear from the past ruin the future.”
“I won’t.” You whispered, she sent one last weak smile your way before leaving. The door closing behind her sent a new influx of tears rolling down your cheeks as you tried desperately to process what had just happened.
________________________
After the talk with Wanda, it took you several days to work up the courage to reach out to Leigh again. The fear of the past and the fear that you had ruined the future still kept you up at night and made it almost impossible to function. You had to try though. You couldn’t let her slip away without her knowing that it was her… Even if she didn’t want you anymore. She deserved to know that her love wasn’t in vain. That she was right. It was always going to be her.
A quiet curse slipped past your lips when your call when straight to voicemail and a quick glance at your text messages further confirmed what you had already suspected. You were blocked. You couldn’t even blame her because when the roles were reversed you fell off the face of her earth entirely.
Your heart dropped at the thought that you would be forced to live through the same outcome once again. Stuck in the cruel cycle of tragic timing.
Except you wouldn’t let that happen again. You couldn’t. You refused to let her be the one that got away. Never before had a decision been clearer to you. Once the walls fell, everything else came crashing down around them.
As you ran around your house searching for the keys to your car you pulled up Jules’ contact and hit call hoping that she would answer. After several rings you were sure the attempt was fruitless when-
“What could you possibly want, Y/n?”
You winced at the bite in Jules’ words. Sometimes you forgot how punishing Shaw’s could be when they wanted to. “I just-… Is Leigh there? I think I’m blocked.”
“For good reason.” Jules snapped. “She just stopped crying. And I don’t mean a couple of tears because she was sad. I’m talking about collapsing and sobbing at the sky tears.”
Tears began falling down your cheeks with Jules’ words. You clenched your eyes shut to push through. “Jules, I’m sorry. I need to make this right. Please. Help me make this right.” You took a shaky breath. “Is she home? Can I see her?”
“We’re leaving, Y/n.”
The world stopped spinning. You were sure of it. “What?” You choked out.
“We’re leaving.” Jules repeated, her tone softer. “I’m going to Vietnam and Leigh decided to come with me. I don’t know how long we’ll be gone.”
Your knees felt like they would give out under the weight of her words. “When?”
There was a brief moment of silence. “Today. We’re leaving in a few minutes actually.” A lump built in your throat because you couldn’t believe that you lost her. Again. And you were entirely to blame.
“Jules-”
“I have to go now. I’m sorry, Y/n. Take care of yourself.”
Before you could get another word out the dial tone filled your ears. “No.” You mumbled to yourself. “No, no, no.”
Grabbing your keys, you sprinted out the door, breaking several laws to get to Leigh’s house. You had to see her. To tell her that she was right. That no one else made sense. It was always her from the very beginning and it would always be her until the very end.
Your heart was Leigh Shaw and it didn’t matter how hard you tried to push her out, you couldn’t. You’d spend the rest of your life with her name etched into every part of your soul. She was in your veins and there was no way you’d ever get her out. You didn’t want to. Not when you finally knew that she loved you too. Not when you were finally ready to face your fears and take the leap of faith.
A loud curse slipped past your lips when you were a block away from Leigh only to see the road blocked off from some unnecessary LA construction. That wasn’t going to stop you.
You could run the rest of the way. You’d crawl there if you had to.
Quickly parking your car off the side of the road you stepped out and began sprinting in the direction of the house. Hoping and praying with everything within yourself that you weren’t too late.
The sight that greeted you when you finally made it to the house made your heart stop. You slowed to a stop. Leigh’s mother was making her way back into the house after waving to a car that had already made it half way up the street. Even sprinting you wouldn’t be able to catch it.
You were too late.
Leigh would become your greatest what-if. No matter how hard you tried it seemed the universe was adamant about keeping you two apart. The timing of the car in the distance proving that more than anything.
Except this time you had no one to blame but yourself.
With a heavy heart, you dropped your head and turned around. You couldn’t bear to see the car disappear from sight. Taking with it the love of your life and the one thing you never got right.
Desperately you fought back a sob, as you began your slow trek back in the direction you came from. The hole in your chest making the task feel almost impossible. You just wanted to be alone and wallow in the misery that was a cause of your own indecision.
Everything around you quickly faded into nothing as your body went numb. The feeling reminiscent from the night of her wedding when you lost her the first time… only this was worse. So much worse. Your heartbreak was caused by your own hands and it was your burden to bear alone. You could have been happy.
Almost. Maybe. Perhaps. So close. Could have. That’s all you had ever been with Leigh and it seemed that you were destined to finish that way as well.
Heartbreak would be her name, echoing over and over again in your mind until the end of time.
“Y/N! Y/N!”
Your heart leapt in your chest at the sound as you quickly turned. The sight rendered you immobile because there was Leigh. Not in the car. Not disappearing in the distance. Not in another country. There. Running at you with tears streaming down her cheeks.
The ability to breath became almost impossible as she got closer and closer. Then suddenly she was where she was always supposed to be. In your arms.
Her tears soaked through your shirt as she openly cried into your chest and you could do nothing but allow your tears to flow as well as you just held one another tightly.
As if you were both scared any movement would make the other disappear.
“I love you.” You gasped in her hair. “I love you so much and I’m so sorry. I was scared. I don’t expect anything back. You don’t even need to reply. I just needed you to know that I love you, Leigh Shaw. I always have and now I know that I always will.”
Leigh pulled back slightly to stare at you with parted lips, her watery eyes searching yours. “I love you, too.” She breathed out, giving you a watery smile. “That was just the end of the chapter, not the end of our story.”
Your heart soared, and you gave her a smile of your own. Because finally… finally. There was no one running away, you were just running towards one another like you always should have been.
Like two magnets, you were both drawn into a passionate kiss. The kind of kiss that breaks open the sky and steals your breath away.
The kiss showed you that every other kiss you’d had in your life had been wrong.
Her fingers slid into your hair, pulling you closer, as close as physically possible. You were sure your heart had exploded under her touch. All you wanted was Leigh. The feeling of her in your arms – all of her – pressed flush to you. It was right, and your heart had never felt more whole.
The moment was interrupted by a hand lightly tapping your face. You and Leigh pulled apart with matching expressions of confusion, your arms still wrapped tightly around one another. “Hi, yeah, did you forget about something?” Jules asked sarcastically.
Your heart dropped as you looked over at Leigh, remembering the fact that she was leaving. “Jules, I-” Leigh began.
Jules face broke out in a smile. “I was kidding. Don’t even worry about it” She waved a hand dismissively. “You were planning on buying your ticket when we got to LAX anyway.”
You could feel Leigh lean into you in relief, her head tucked just under your chin. “You’re not mad?”
“Of course not. I’ve been waiting for you two idiots to admit you were in love since I was five.” You smiled, feeling a blush creep up your neck. “Besides... now no one will judge me about how I do things on the trip. I'm kind of relieved.”
You chuckled as you absently ran a hand up and down Leigh’s back. “I resent that.” Leigh mumbled.
“But do you deny it?” You asked teasingly.
There was a short pause. “No... but I resent it.” You could feel her press a kiss to your collarbone and you smiled.
For a moment the three of you stood in comfortable silence. “Leigh?” Jules called.
“Mhm?” She mumbled into your neck.
“I’m happy for you…” She paused and looked at you meaningfully. “For both of you. I think this is where you both have always belonged.”
Leigh lifted her head and smiled back at Jules. Your heart fluttered at the sight. “Yeah. I think so too. How about you?” She asked as she looked at you with glimmering eyes.
You melted under her gaze. The sharp edges faded away. “I think so.” You breathed out, smiling lovingly back at her.
Jules clapped and you both turned your heads to look at her. “Alright, kids. Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone. Like elope or something.” She pointed warningly at Leigh. “I’m serious. I have dibs on maid of honor. You can’t take that moment from me because I’ll be out of the country.”
You laughed awkwardly as Jules got back into the car and drove off. “I think Jules is planning our wedding for us and we aren’t even official yet.”
Leigh stroked your cheek tenderly. You felt every nerve ending in your body burst at the simple touch because of the love in her eyes when she did it. “Well, I don’t know when you’ll be ready for titles, but I hope you know I don’t plan on letting you go again.”
She leaned in, so her lips were ghosting over yours. You smiled. “I don’t plan on letting you go either.”
With a smile, Leigh connected your lips again and you lost yourselves in one another.
And when Leigh proposed to you a year later you said yes without hesitation because while there weren’t many things in life you were certain of, you would always be certain of her. You loved her and you didn't plan on letting her go.
And with that... we have concluded with the Leigh/ Wanda story. I would just like to thank each and every one of you from the bottom of my heart for reading this story and being so passionate about it. I would not have done it without the support from all of you.
I loved each essay I got defending the girls and every single comment that you all made defending your position. I am a little heartbroken to see this story come to an end because as much as I love my other stories, this is my favorite thing I've ever written.
Anyway, sorry for getting sappy. Please let me know all your thoughts and comments I'm so excited/ nervous to hear what you all think! I hope you enjoyed taking this journey with me.
p.s. shout out to @sokoalex and @abimess for helping me find the Leigh gif!
Tag list:
@khiaraaa-in-spacee // @causeitswhatjesuswouldfreakingdo // @halobaby // @madamevirgo // @aimezvousbrahms // @trikruismybitch // @marvels-writings // @izalesbean // @imdreamingblo // @i-choose-you-cyndaquil // @helloalycia // @scarlets-maximoff // @cantcontroltheirfear // @women-am-i-right // @funnysoldier // @myfavoriteficss // @imapotatao // @imagine-reblog // @blackxwidowsxwife // @purplemeetsblue // @cristin-rjd // @ravens-ss // @legaypandaboi // @myperfectlovepoem // @diaryoflife // @stupidsapphicsstuff //@ouat2017 // @abimess // @wellsayhelloaagin // @mionemymind
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tomboy-writer · 3 years ago
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Prompt: Chris Evans story where your boyfriend is a cheating douche-bag. He cheats on you time and time again and you get into a bit of a depression. You confide in your best friend, Chris Evans. His consoling leads to sex, the sex soon turns into a regular thing and you get happy again. Your boyfriend sees your change and promises that he will never cheat again and that he will treat you better. You’re happy but sad at the same time because now you have to break things off with Chris. But Chris won’t have it; he says that you should stay with him and not your boyfriend. You’re not sure of which decision to make, so Chris lists off reasons why you would be better off with him.
Chris Evans x black!reader
A/N: my first Chris Evans story!! Let me know what you guys think of it.
A/N 2: I started this story a few years ago and it took me a long time to finish cause I was on a very long writing hiatus and didn't finish this until earlier this year, so some of the story goes off of what the summary says and I decided to turn this into 2 parts (could be more, depending on how long the 2nd part is). So no smut in this part, just angst and dumb jokes. This also originally wasn't going to be a black reader story, but seeing how my ACTUAL 1st Chris Evans story went pretty well (the Game On story) I decided to make it another one cause I love it.
C/W: angst, swearing, my dumb jokes, 3rd person story (it hurt my brain to write it this way, but I wanted to try something different)
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“He did it again, Chris! Michael cheated on me with some big titted chick,” Y/N said as she sobbed into her best friend’s shoulder.
Chris rubbed his friend’s back, trying to calm her down. He knew how to handle situations like these since Y/N went through so many of them with her boyfriend. Chris thought her relationship with Michael was like a broken record: always repeating itself. It was good at first with the couple being so obviously in love, but that changed six months later when Michael decided that Y/N wasn’t enough and started to cheat on her with multiple women. Y/N had been given advice by Chris countless times about guys like Michael and she listened to him, she really did. But she always ended up forgiving her unfaithful boyfriend and enjoyed the makeup sex that Michael would give her after.
“He and that big titted chick can both go to hell for all I care,” Chris replied. Then he lifted his friend’s head from his shoulder and made her look directly in his eyes. “Hey hon,” he said using his ‘friendly’ nickname for Y/N. “I think it’s about time you dropped that lame ass zero and got yourself a hero.”
“Okay, Captain America,” Y/N chuckled while wiping her face.
Chris laughed too, but deep down he was really hoping that Y/N would actually consider dating him. They met seven years ago and became fast friends. But the bearded actor didn’t count on falling for Y/N a few years later when he was doing an interview for one of his new movies and Y/N was there to help support him and make sure his anxiety didn’t get the best of him. While in the middle of the interview, Chris started to feel a little fidgety, so he tugged on his ear; a sign that told Y/N that he needed her help. She was standing right behind the cameraman, so Y/N could see everything that Chris was doing. She saw the signal and started to make some weird faces for her best friend.
Y/N made Chris and the interviewer crack up that day, especially when she stood right behind the cameraman and started to bulge her eyes out at him, making him laugh as well. At that moment, Chris realized that he had found that special someone. That special someone that he wants to spend the rest of his life with and just keep forever, never let go. 
Y/N was sweet, considerate and loved Disney movies and dogs as much as he did. So he felt that she was just perfect for him. He even started to mentally kick his ass for taking so long to realize this.
The interviewer asked Chris one last question before he had to leave.
“So, Chris, is there a special lady in your life? Ya know, besides your mother and sisters,” she asked.
Chris chuckled and looked right in Y/N’s direction with a bright smile on his face. “Well, I don’t have anyone yet,” the blonde answered, his eyes never leaving Y/N’s, “but I’m looking for her.”
“Chris? Chris, did you hear me,” Y/N asked suddenly, stopping Chris from remembering the day he fell for her.
Evans shook his head no. “Sorry, I zoned out for a few seconds.”
Y/N rolled her eyes. “I said I would love to find a new boyfriend, but I’m still in love with Michael.” Chris rolled his eyes this time. “Don’t do that, man. I can’t help that these are my feelings for him.”
“But what are your feelings for him right now! Aren’t you sad? Pissed? Or feeling like you just wanna punch that douche-bag in the face so hard that his face caves in a little bit?”
Chris’s friend nodded her head yes and started to sob again. He felt bad for making Y/N cry; he would never want to make her tears fall from her eyes unless they were tears of joy. He grabbed Y/N and embraced her for a few minutes until she was calm again. Once was she was, Chris pulled away from Y/N enough to look her in her eyes.
“Hey, promise me that you’ll forget about that douche for at least two weeks and just try to find someone better. Okay?” Chris begged with sincerity in his eyes. 
“Okay,” I promise,” Y/N complied.
Chris kissed Y/N’s head and, after saying goodbye, left his friend’s house for the night.
           * * *
Chris returned to Y/N’s house a few weeks later. He rung the doorbell and heard a faint ‘it’s open’. Evans opened and closed the door behind him and blushed at the sight in front of him: there stood Y/N, wearing only a pair of boy shorts and an over sized t-shirt, no makeup. That’s when Chris thought, no knew, that Y/N was the most beautiful woman out there.
"Hi Chris," Y/N greeted her best friend with a warm hug and a kiss on his cheek. Evans couldn't help the blush that crept onto his face. He also couldn't help but to imagine if he and Y/N were together and he'd come home from being on set all day long, her greeting him the same way she was now except that she'd try to pull back a little to ask him about his day. But Chris would hold his lover in a tight embrace, kiss her so lovingly, so passionately, and ask about her day instead.
Yeah, Christopher Robert [Jamal] Evans would love that.
"Hey, Y/N," Chris replied as he breathed in the embrace. "How've you been lately?"
"A little bit better; not fully okay, but I'm getting there I think," Y/N answered.
Chris shook his head in disbelief. He knew when his best friend was lying to him. "Y/N," he whispered, "I can see in your eyes that you're hurting more than letting on. You sure you're doing fine?"
Y/N's smile was quickly replaced with a small frown. "I'm doin' fine, Evans," she answered, mocking Chris's Boston accent. "And, before you ask, yes I have went on a few dates with other guys; three to be exact. First guy wouldn't shut up about his ex-wife; like I was supposed to be his therapist or something. Second guy -this gorgeous dreadhead- we connected and shit, but he too wouldn't stop talking about his ex and his table manners were terrible." You rolled your eyes before finishing your list. "Last but not least, I went on date with Mr. I-Got-Tons-of-Money-Baby. We didn't connect at all and I'm sure it was cause of his cocky attitude and the way he talked down to people -it was disgusting! " The dateless woman flounced into her big living room and plopped down onto her L-shaped sofa. "Trying to find a new man is pointless, Chris. Either I start dating women cause why the fuck not!? Or I just give up on love all together."
Chris chuckled but then nervously cleared his throat after he came up with a great -but what he also thought was a heart attack inducing- idea. "Y/N," he stammered.
"Yeah, man?"
"If the whole thing with you dating females doesn't work out, but you still want to try to find love, then I know exactly who you should date next."
Y/N gave Chris a questionable look. He didn't say anything back, just raised an eyebrow and grinned mischievously. It took Y/N a few seconds to understand what Chris was talking about. But once she did, her mouth went into an O shape, showing her shock and surprise.
"Are you serious, Evans," Y/N exclaimed; eyes now wide as golf balls. "You wanna date me!?!"
The actor chuckled. He didn't think that his friend would be so shocked by his words. "I've been wanting to date you basically almost ever since we first met, Y/N. I just- -I just never knew what to say to you about it, or if you felt the same way or not and if you didn't then I didn't want to ruin our friendship, or if you did feel the dame way but then something bad happens to us down the road and then that messes with up our friendship and then there's the thing with paparazzi..." Chris was rambling on and on but Y/N was listening to everything he was saying. Hanging onto every word that was coming out of her best friend's mouth.
Y/N had never known that Chris had felt this way about her. It wasn't that she was completely oblivious (well, maybe a little), but she also never saw any signs of her friend being in love with her. Wait. Was Chris in love with Y/N? As far as she knew -or as far as she thought from what she was told so far- this was just a crush. A crush confession that apparently was a long time coming. She wondered how she felt for Chris; did she have the same feelings for him like he did for her? When they first met, all Y/N cared about was how Chris acted as a person, not as Captain America or as an actor in general. But as Chris Evans, an everyday man. Y/N knew, after that one day of meeting Evans, that she wanted to be best friends with the man, nothing more and nothing less. But now, with Chris' confession and continuous ramblings, Y/N was having different and a little bit confusing thoughts.
Sure Chris Evans is an very attractive man, physically speaking. But Y/N doesn't care about looks -much- when it comes to dating or anything for that matter. She thinks what makes people attractive is their personality more than anything, and she knows Chris has the best personality she's ever seen from a person. But she wasn't sure if she was ready to date him or anyone else for that matter. Although, if Y/N was going to date more, then Chris would probably be her number one pick.
"So, what do you say, Y/N," Chris asked, hopeful.
______________________________________________________________
And that's the end of part 1, everyone. Part 2 will be posted....probably next week or so. It is currently one of my WIPs so I'm definitely working on it.
But what do ya'll think will happen next? What will Y/N's answer to Chris be? Will she say yes, or will she say no? Who knows??? Except for me; I know. Also, you're Y/N; Y/N is you, so you better hope that you say something positive back :P Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed this! Thanks for reading!!
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bestiesenpai · 4 years ago
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Hostage - Okkotsu Yuta
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At first when I saw this my internal response was that there was nothing that I really wanted to write, no scenario that would warrant answering such a question. But I’ve given it time and well...what better thing to write than a horny for love delusional yandere? Gender neutral and Okkotsu in this has graduated from the school, I imagine him to be mid-20s 4.8k words
Content warnings: yandere shit(which in this context includes kidnapping, past stalking and being really fucking creepy), manipulation, noncon hand job
How long had you been here in this dark basement with only a red couch and a TV that wouldn’t turn on? There wasn’t a single window to tell you if it was day or night, no clock on the wall to say if it had been ten minutes or ten hours since you were kidnapped. You didn’t even know who could have taken you, knocked out from behind after hearing a mysterious voice.
There wasn’t a single lead to go on except for the fact that you would pass out from time to time and wake up to food on the low coffee table, hot meals that helped to soothe your otherwise empty mind and body for however short a time it allowed. Sometimes there would be candy stuffed into your pockets as well, candy that you never ate and let pile up in one of the corners of the room.
The door at the top of the stairs leading down to where you were stayed locked at all times and no amount of banging and screaming and trying to break it down worked. All your efforts were for nothing, you didn’t even make a scratch in the wood.
Whoever put you down here seemed too hesitant to show you their identity. You never heard anyone outside the door and whenever you thought you did, you would wake up however many hours later with food and no recollection of what happened before then.
Until today, when the door silently swayed open and there was the barely there tap of footsteps coming down to greet you. Scurrying behind the couch and crouching down, you were scared to finally meet your captor.
“Hello there.” He wasn’t at all what you imagined. A young man with noticeable bags under his eyes, hair with a few strands that fell into his face and an otherwise unassuming and slim build. His voice was soft and gentle like he was talking to a baby as he roused them from slumber.
He immediately noticed the way you were trying to stay away from him, making sure to keep the couch between you as he rounded it. A sad sigh left his lips, a short sound like he was already getting frustrated with what you were doing.
“Darling, why don’t you sit down? There’s a lot to discuss.” Gesturing toward the couch, he took a seat at the end. It was then that you noticed the sheathed sword he had on his back as he took it off and laid it on the table.
Your mouth hadn’t been used to speak to anyone in a long time, tongue heavy and foreign in your mouth. Having given up screaming for help a long time ago, you didn’t speak to anyone unless to yourself, and even then it had devolved to being just thoughts in your head.
So you shook your head no, trying to keep your sudden anxious breathing down to a minimum. You’d waited for this day to finally see who took you but now that he was here in front of you, just his presence brought you great stress.
“Are you feeling okay?” The man asked again, brows furrowing slightly. The look of genuine concern on his face is what caused you to speak, spiking anger in your heart.
“No!” You shouted, surprising both him and yourself.
“Why don’t you sit down, hm?” He patted the cushion next to him and you shook your head harder.
“No, no. L-let me go!” Tears were already beginning to collect in your eyes, some spilling out the sides. Were they from anger at being held captive? From how concerned he looked when he was the one who put you there? Was it from fear of what he could do to you? Perhaps hopelessness at the whole situation was starting to set into places you tried so hard to keep it out of.
“You shouldn’t yell, (Y/N), it’s not good for your throat.”
“What the fuck would you know.” Now anger was truly taking residency inside your chest, making it tighten with each pounding beat of your heart. This man had the nerve to call you by your first name as if he was a friend, the syllables rolling so smoothly off his tongue it sounded as if he had said it a hundred times.
“Don’t swear at me.” He snapped, face immediately going hard as he stared you down. The look made a shiver go down your spine, the anger quickly making space for fear to come as well. He sighed again, glancing at his sword before looking at you again. “Now please, won’t you sit down?”
This time when he asked, you listened. Hovering on the very edge of the cushion farthest from him, your entire body was painfully stiff and unyielding even to your own breathing. It was different when you were standing and he was sitting, it felt like there was a level of control that you still had.
But this felt like you were just a pitiful little rabbit with their neck caught right in a lion's mouth.
“Oh darling don’t cry, don’t cry. I didn’t mean to snap at you.” His tone immediately shifted back to the soft and gentle one from earlier. Reaching his hand out, he stopped short of touching your arm when you curled yourself away. Putting his hand into a fist and tucking it back into his lap, he let out a sharp exhale. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t touch you, should I? You must be nervous now that I’m here.”
Sniffling and nodding were all you could do to answer him. Maybe there was a logical reason he might have taken you, there had to be a solution to whatever problem he had that involved you.
“It’s funny, I’d say. We’re soulmates and yet we’re still so nervous with each other.”
What?
“Why, it took me almost two weeks just to do this much! I finally stopped having Inumaki put you to sleep and-”
Huh?
“Before you know it this will all be a distant memory, we’ll be living together-”
“Wh-what the fuck.” Your voice was meek and trembling and there were fat tears streaming down your face that couldn’t be stopped now. Listening to this man go on and on about this life he’d made for the two of you all in his head was going to drive you insane.
“What was that?” He paused, a hopeful smile on his face. Glancing at him, you set your bleary eyes on the sword.
“What the fuck are you talking about?” As the swear left your lips, you flinched at his sudden inhale. “I-I don’t- I don’t know you. We’ve never met.” Burrowing your face in your hands was probably a bad idea, it was probably best to keep him in your line of sight, but you just couldn’t face him.
“Physically we’ve never met, but our hearts have. Our souls are connected, we just had to find each other.” There was a dip in the cushions and the ghost of his knee brushed yours.
“I don’t even know your name!” You croaked, further curling in on yourself by dropping your head to your knees. At this rate you were set to fall off the couch and onto the floor and you welcomed the reprieve not being next to him would bring.
“I’m Yuta. Yuta Okkotsu.” The first touch of his fingers on your shoulder made you yelp and jerk away, and you could imagine his hand hovering in the air. “But you can just call me your boyfriend, okay?”
“You’re fucking crazy.” Getting up from the couch the second time he touched you, you pressed yourself against the furthest wall next to a chess table with no pieces.
“Darling-”
“No, don’t fucking call me that!” Stamping your foot on the ground, you ignored his warning tone.
“(Y/N), I told you-”
“I don’t give a damn! I don’t want to be part of whatever bullshit you said earlier! Just- just let me go!” You were getting hysterical at this point, your whole body was hot and sweaty and your face was on fire. It was hard to hear anything over the ringing and pounding in your ears giving you headache.
Except you were able to hear the sound of a knife going through the air and feel it graze your cheek before sticking into the wall behind you. Everything fell away as you looked at the silver blade glinting in the harsh fluorescent light above you. There was just the tiniest hint of red at the edge, further proof that what you felt was real.
“I don’t mind you getting upset, I don’t mind you yelling and screaming at me. It’s a normal reaction to such a new situation.” Yuta’s low voice cut through the sudden silence and he stood up slowly, swaying slightly on his feet before planting them firmly on the ground. “But what I won’t have is such ugly words coming out of your mouth. That type of language doesn’t belong in a mouth as pretty as yours.”
He walked over to you slowly, building the tension with every step he took. It was then that you noticed, when he was only a foot away, that the silver of the knife matched the silver buttons on his shirt.
“If I have to remind you again, I promise I won’t miss.” Letting the sentence hang in the air, Yuta gave you a once over before grabbing onto your wrist and upper arm tightly and dragging you back to the couch. His strength was much more than you first assumed, there wasn’t a chance in hell that you could ever hope to wiggle out of his hold.
Sitting down with a huff, he pulled you onto his lap, forcing you to straddle him. Putting your hands on his shoulders, he settled his on your hips, making sure you were properly seated on his outstretched legs. Staring at the buttons on his shirt, you tried to avoid getting too close - keeping at least some semblance of an arms length between you and making sure your sex was far from his.
“This isn’t so bad, is it?” It was amazing how easily his mood shifted from one to the other. What had just been a quite heavy and intense moment was washed away by a little uptick of his lips and the tilt of his head to the side.
The things you wished to say were lodged in your mouth, waiting on the tip of your tongue for you to open up and let them fall out. But you couldn’t afford to keep testing his patience like this, not after what just happened.
“I suppose.” So you bite your tongue hard and say what you think will get you closer to getting out. Whatever it is he wants you can give him so long as it keeps him happy and lets you walk free.
“I knew you’d come around.” The smile on Yuta’s face takes proper form, pushing the apples of his cheeks up and wrinkling his eyes. One hand on your hips dares to venture further onto the small of your back. The warmth of his palm would be comforting in another setting.
“Y-yuta.” It almost makes you sick to say his name.
“Yes?” It makes his eyes light up.
“When will I get to leave?” Somewhere along the line you’d stopped crying and now only your eyes burned with the memory of the tears.
“When I know you’re ready, (Y/N).” He said softly, rubbing a hand on your back.
“Ready how?”
“I just want to make sure of a few things before we start our new life together. Is that okay?”
Did you really have a choice?
“What things?” You pushed, your fingers digging into his shoulders.
“Don’t worry about that right now. We’re together now and that’s all that matters.”
“Please tell me, I really want to know.”
“(Y/N).” He sang your name but it was anything but cheery. “I don’t want to talk about that right now, so drop it please.” Even though he was speaking his mouth barely moved, jaw locked tight in hardly hidden frustration.
“Okay.” You quickly let the subject go.
“Now darling…” Yuta brought a hand up to your face, trailing his fingers down your cheek softly. “Won’t you smile for me? You have such a pretty smile.”
The question of how he knew what your smile looked like cropped up in your head but you quickly stamped it out. Now wasn’t the time to worry about those things. Doing as he asked, you gave him your best smile.
“Absolutely gorgeous.” Skimming his thumb along your bottom lip, Yuta grasped your chin in his fingers. “I’ve been missing your smile so much lately, the recent missions I’ve been on have really put a damper on my mood.”
“I’m- I’m sorry to hear that.” Extending an olive branch wouldn’t hurt, right? It was clear he wanted your compliance in this scheme of his, desperate to have you love him. Your words shot straight into Yuta’s heart, making him bite his lip in to stop a shy giggle from coming out.
“It’s okay, it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that I have my darling with me.” A light blush went over his cheeks and Yuta let a sliver of the giggle out. “But there is something that would make me feel even better.”
“What’s that?” It didn’t take a genius to figure out what he meant when his thumb touched your lip again.
“A kiss. Just one, I promise.” Licking his own lips, Yuta grabbed onto your jaw more firmly. “I swear I’ll be gentle.” Weighing your options, the inkling that it wouldn’t be ‘just one’ was in the back of your head. But as long as it stayed just kissing, maybe you’d be okay.
“One.” You repeated, allowing him to pull you in and close the gap between you. Kissing Yuta was something that, once again, would feel nice in any other circumstance. The texture of his lips wasn’t bad, his breath didn’t smell and he seemed to know what he was doing. Maybe in another world, you really could have been soulmates.
Breaking the first kiss to take a short inhale, Yuta immediately went in for another. The hand that was on your jaw slid up to the back of your head, holding it firmly in his calloused hand to make sure you didn’t move.
“Y-yuta!” Whining against his lips, you tried to push away from him.
“Just one, I know! I know but-” He mumbled back, the tip of his tongue daring to touch your pursed lips. “I can’t help it, I love you so much.” Crushing you against him, Yuta got his tongue into your mouth when you gasped for air. The urge to bite him arose and you almost did, but he pulled away right as you made the decision to.
“You said only one!” Giving his chest a hard push, you wiped the spit off your lips in disgust.
“I know, I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Putting his hands on your back, Yuta grimaced at you. “I’m sorry darling, I just got excited! I’ve been dreaming of kissing you for so long, can you blame me for wanting more?”
You could blame him for that and a few other things. Wiping your mouth off again, you huffed angrily and avoided his sorry eyes.
“Don’t do it again.”
“I won’t lie to you anymore, I promise.” Yuta mumbled, already forcing you closer again. “Let me make it up to you.”
“Yuta, no.” Shaking your head, you put a hand over your mouth. The blush that was on Yuta’s cheeks got darker and a hand gripped the back of your neck.
“It may be a bit soon, but there are other places where I can kiss you.” Latching his lips onto the side of your neck, Yuta sucked on the skin lightly. He didn’t want to leave any unseemly marks on you and he wouldn’t dream of using his teeth.
“Yuta, get off.” Tugging on his collar, you squirmed at the feeling. “P-please, Yuta, get off.” You were getting more desperate by the moment, accelerated by his lips going down the column of your throat and to the collar of your top.
“I just want to kiss you, (Y/N).”
“No, no I don’t-” As his head nudged your chin up, you started to sweat and really yank at the fabric in your hands. “I don’t want you to kiss me there, Yuta!” Your voice reached a crescendo and the soft sound of his kisses stopped. Pulling away slowly, Yuta kept his head ducked down.
“I’m sorry (Y/N), I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” Releasing the hold on your neck, Yuta smooths his hand down your back once more and threads his fingers together at the base of your spine.
Struggling to catch your breath, you force yourself to relax and let your head dip down, uncurling the fingers fisting the fabric of Yutas shirt and letting the blood naturally flow back to them.
As the silent seconds tick by, there’s something that comes into your consciousness that can’t be ignored. There’s already a good amount of heat built up between you and Yuta from the kisses you shared and the struggle that ensued.
But was he that much of a repressed man that just kissing your lips and neck had his cock standing at half attention? It seemed so, because when you made a face at it, he chuckled sheepishly.
“Sorry.” Yuta wasn’t sorry for what was happening. He didn’t feel remorse for any of this, especially not the thing that was causing you distress now. It was only natural for such a reaction to occur! You were squirming so much on his lap while he kissed you that it was like you were begging him to get hard.
Gently raking his nails up and down your back, Yuta stared hard at your lips. His gaze almost pierced right through you and he wasn’t subtle about wanting another kiss. Another slurry of apologies left Yuta’s lips as he once again grabbed the back of your head and forced you to kiss him. His words got mushed together, spoken against your lips as he tried to work his tongue into your mouth.
Whatever screams of protest you had didn’t matter in this moment, Yuta was a man on a mission and desperate to take what was his. He felt bad about pushing your boundaries and ruining the chance of growing an actual relationship any time soon, but those were things he was willing to sacrifice.
And after all, good boyfriends help their partners grow in uncomfortable situations.
Moaning in a high pitch when your crotch just barely grazed his, Yuta took advantage of the fact you were too busy trying to push him away to focus on your lower half. Grabbing you tightly at the hips, he dragged you forward and fully pushed you against the front of his pants.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He panted as he moved your bodies in tandem, getting bolder and bucking his hips like a sad teenager dry humping for the first time. This continued for a while and you were sure he was going to cum when he suddenly stopped and flopped his head back against the couch.
Fervently wiping off your lips, the urge to slap him came over you in a blinding rage, and you quickly swiped your hand down. Fully expecting to make contact with his face, you put all the strength you could into the motion only to be stopped by Yuta grabbing your wrist.
“Hitting isn’t very nice, (Y/N).” He sounded like a disappointed preschool teacher and when you raised your other hand to try and slap him he caught that one as well. Holding both your wrists tightly in his grasp, Yuta stared at your heaving chest as he thought about what to do.
“Let me go.” You said, trying to tug yourself free.
“Sshh, I’m thinking.” His eyes wouldn’t leave your chest and he licked his lips. “I think I know a better use for your hands.” Letting go of one of them, Yuta was quick to go to the button on his jeans and undo them.
Your fingers were touching his clothed cock before you had a chance to protest. The speed Yuta moved at was dizzying and you seemed to be about 10 seconds behind him, left to scramble and catch up on whatever he’d done.
“Just a little, please?” Yuta whined and gripped your fingers around his cock, digging into the fabric of his dark underwear and outlining the shape of his cock.
“Yuta…” Back were the tears, a light misting this time that blurred your vision. It was gross touching him, even as the scent of a minty body wash rolled off him. This was gross, the heat from his cock and the way the skin moved beneath your fingers all felt horribly off.
“Just be good for me, (Y/N), I know you can do that.” Giving your lips a quick peck, Yuta let out a shaky exhale. His hand was holding yours so tightly your hand pulsed, throbbing from lack of circulation.
Touching him through his underwear quickly became not enough for Yuta and he hurriedly pulled his cock out, shoving his underwear down his thighs a bit to make more room. Unbuttoning the large overshirt he had on, Yuta let out another exhale as the sweat evaporated off his body.
“Are you shy? Here, touch it like this.” Gingerly now he wrapped your hand around his shaft, squeezing with just enough pressure to make sure you were really holding it. You tried to avoid looking at it, staring at the tanktop Yuta had on underneath his other shirt.
Tilting your head up, he kissed you gently as he worked your hand up and down his cock, slowly loosening his hold the longer he went until he was able to let go and you were still stroking him.
“I love you so much.” He whispered, breaking the kiss to press his forehead against yours. “So, so much.” You whimpered in response, keeping your eyes tightly closed to avoid looking at him. “I’ve followed you for so long now, it feels amazing to finally be here with you.”
“Followed?” You didn’t want to know, you didn’t want to know, you didn’t-
“Six months. For six long, agonizing months I watched you from the shadows. Making sure you were safe, following you home from work to make sure no one messed with you, going into your home when you weren’t there to make sure you didn’t have the stove on-”
“Stop.” Sniffling back another wave of tears, you shook your head. “I-I can’t, please-”
“You’re right, I’m killing the mood.” Chuckling softly, Yuta kissed at the corner of your eye. Putting his hand back on yours, he sped up the pace and bucked his hips up. “A-and I really don’t want to do that.”
Kissing you again lest he start rambling again, Yuta moaned freely into your mouth. He had dreamed of this moment and so many others, staying up late at night just fantasizing about you touching him and finally being in his arms.
To say he was pent up was an understatement. Ever since he saw you, Yuta vowed not to touch himself, wanting you to be the only one that gave him such pleasure. It was a painful wait, but every time he saw you he knew it was worth it - and it was. He was already nearing an orgasm and it hadn’t even been that long.
“Oh darling-” His face started to screw up and Yuta broke the kiss, putting his head on your shoulder and making your hand go faster. “God I love you, (Y/N)! I lo-love-” He was babbling now, unable to focus on any full sentence coming out of his mouth. “Say it- tell me.”
“Say what?” You asked, struggling to keep your breathing even as you felt him get closer to the edge.
“You love me. Tell me you- tell me you love me, even if it’s not true yet.” Yuta was so close it hurt, but he refused to cum unless you said those words.
“I-I-” The desire to not say it was strong, keeping you from really forming the words. It wasn’t true right now and it would never be true. You would never love Yuta for as long as you lived.
“Say it, say it please!” Yuta wailed, his other hand gripping your waist so hard you were afraid he was going to break something. “I love you so much, just say it back!”
“I love you! Yuta, I love you, okay?” His hold was really starting to hurt and as soon as you said it, he let go. “I love you, I love you.” You repeated over and over until his body locked up and he came with an almost sobbing moan.
“Oh god, darling, I love you.” Yuta wasn’t crying but he might as well have been. His hand stopped for a brief moment before continuing, coating the back of his hand and your fingers in his cum. He kept going until he was able to squeeze the last drop of cum out of him, swiping at the tip with his thumb until the sensation began to hurt.
It was too quiet now in the room without Yuta’s frantic breathing and mindless babbles. Taking deep, gasping breaths, he forced himself to calm down and let go of your hand, letting his softening cock fall down against him.
“Here.” In his pocket he had a handkerchief and Yuta wiped your hand clean, diligently going between the digits and getting every last pearly drop. Throwing it onto the coffee table, Yuta collapsed back onto the couch with a heavy sigh.
His face was impossibly blissed out, a dopey smile stretching his face and showing off his teeth. He couldn’t be happier in this moment, the weight of your body on his lap a constant reminder that this was real life, the reality that he had been dreaming of and striving for for so long.
The door he had entered from creaked open much faster than when he entered, and there were thundering footsteps descending the stairs quickly. Yuta immediately perked up, hugging you close to his chest as he turned over his shoulder to look at who came in.
“This is a surprise.” There was a tall, lanky man standing at the bottom of the steps, his white hair sticking up in all directions. You wondered how he could see with a blindfold on and Yuta seemed happy to see him.
“Gojo, hello!” Rushing to fix his pants, Yuta helped you off his lap and stood up.
“I see you’ve finally made yourself acquainted.” Gojo grinned, his head flicking towards you for a moment.
“Mhmm! We uh- we’re having a great time getting to know each other.” Yuta flushed, trying to not make it obvious that his pants had just been undone and that you’d just been jerking him off.
“Well I hate to break up a happy couple, but there’s a visitor here for you. I think you’re going to have another mission soon.”
“Really, so soon? I just-” Glancing at you, Yuta bit his tongue. “I’ll be back soon.” Grabbing his sword and the knife still stuck in the wall, Yuta gave you one more look before walking past Gojo and up the stairs. As soon as the door clicked closed, you shot up from the couch and walked around to Gojo.
“Please, you have to help me, get me out of here!” Clasping your hands together in front of you, you pleaded as hard as you could. “H-he’s absolutely crazy, please help me!” Unable to look Gojo in the eye, you could only assume he was looking back at you from the way his head moved.
“That’s not very nice, now is it?” He questioned, quirking a brow and crossing his arms. “Yuta loves you so much, you shouldn’t say those things about him.”
“Sir please, you don’t understand!” Shaking your head hard, you let out a frustrated groan. “I don’t belong here! He kidnapped me, don’t you understand?!” It felt like you were the only sane one left in the world. Gojo chuckled and sighed, placing a large hand on the top of your head and leaning forward.
“Actually, Yuta wasn’t the one that actually kidnapped you.” A soft ‘no�� escaped your lips and Gojo laughed again, drinking in the sinking feeling in your gut and the way it twisted your face in agony. “It was me.”
747 notes · View notes
anyoneseenadam · 4 years ago
Note
omg can u do smth about the inner circle finding out about reader and azriel’s relationship? maybe they’ve been like secretly dating for a while! ily <3
pairing: Azriel x reader (acotar)
warnings: butt ton of fluff
a/n: i made this a part two to this fic! but it can be read separately, i love az sm so i hope you enjoy!! (this has not been proofread sorry lol)
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A week later you were invited up to the house of wind. Azriel was swamped with work and missed you, and since he stayed there most the time he had dragged you in with him.
Currently you were lying in his bed, curled around a long pillow, and sleeping, wearing one of his shirts and your panties while he trained. He had promised you he would introduce you all soon but so far you had been sneaking about the house. A task that was easy for the spymaster, but less so for you.
He had tried to treat it like a holiday. Sneaking you down to the kitchen to bake cookies at midnight and spending nights on the roof, pointing out constellations.
When you had first arrived Azriel had explained what was going on with Nesta and Cassian as he snuck you in. While you were walking up, giggling behind one hand, the other tightly clasped in Azriel’s warm calloused hand, you had run into Nesta. Your eyes had widened meeting her, stomach dropping as she sized you up and down.
“Nesta,” Azriel’s voice calmed you slightly as you wrapped both hands around one of his, moving behind him ever so slightly. “This is my girlfriend; we’ve been dating for about six months and you cannot tell Cassian.”
She had smiled then and reached a hand out to shake yours, “am I the first to find out then?” she asked and you nodded.
“I’m (y/n).” You muttered, some confidence coming back.
“Pleasure to meet you, if you ever need someone to bitch too about him come to my room,” she left with a warm smile and you laughed, turning to Azriel.
“I like her,” you said, and he looked down at you frowning.
“Why would you need to bitch about me?” he asked, and you kissed his pout away, pulling his hand to continue onwards.
“Probably cause you smell.” He jabbed your side before picking you up and carrying you over his shoulder into his room, dumping you on the bed and crawling over you.
“Horrible girl,” he muttered, pressing kisses into your neck as he ground his hips down into yours. You giggled into his mouth; the rest of the day spent tangled up in him.
The next few days after that were relaxing. He was always away first thing to train, but you weren’t going to complain when he came back stripping of his clothes, sweaty and flushed but always holding a coffee for you.
The rest of the day would be spent either flying out to walk around shops and see markets in other courts, or sometimes flying over mountains, safe and secure in Azriel’s arms. The day before he had prepared a picnic and taken you to a beautiful field, smiling as you pointed out different kinds of flowers, before he picked a gerbera daisy and pushing it behind your ear, then kissing you so hard you almost fell over.
You woke slightly when Azriel returned, his heart warming when he saw you dozing, engulfed in his scent. He put your coffee next to you and you muttered something inaudible to him, snuggling further into his pillow and smiling sleepily when he pressed a kiss to your head, eyes never opening. He sat by you for a minute and pushed the hair away from your face before deciding he was going to bring you breakfast.
He pressed another kiss to your head before standing, quickly replacing his sweaty clothes, and leaving the room, letting you sleep in. His mind so filled with thoughts of his pretty girl and the smile she would give him when she woke up that he didn’t notice that Cassian wasn’t in the kitchen at his usual time.
You on the other hand noticed it pretty quickly, waking suddenly when the door slammed open, a man’s voice that you didn’t recognise asking your absent lover a question.
The well-built man stopped suddenly when you sat up in bed, his mouth opening and closing like a fish as he tried to work out what to say.
“You’re not Azriel.” He stated, realising that the strange girl he saw was covered in his brothers’ scent. And was wearing his brothers’ clothes. And drinking coffee from his brothers’ mug.
“Yes I am.” You said on impulse, shaking your head at your own stupidity but relaxing when the man you presumed was Cassian relaxed.
“Who are you?” he asked, a smile breaking out on his face when he realised who you were.
“Umm I’m (y/n), Azriel’s girlfriend.” You sat up straighter, pulling the covers tighter over you as you realised you were half dressed.
Cassian’s eyes lit up and he ran to your side, sitting in front of you and cheering. “Tell me everything! How did you guys meet? What do you do? How long have you been together?” he bombarded you with questions and you laughed nervously, silently preying that Azriel would return soon.
“Uhh we’ve been together for about six months and I own a flower shop, that’s where we met,” you explained to him when the door flew open again, another tall, dark haired man running in with three women. You recognised your high lord and lady and blushed bright red as they stared at you, smiling so widely.
“We came as fast as we could.” Rhys explained, introducing himself, his wife and Amren and Morrigan. They all crowded you and you moved back slightly, feeling the panic rise in you as they all asked you a million questions.
They were all kind, but so excited that their friend had gotten a girlfriend they were acting slightly insane. You tried to answer their questions, but they were coming so fast that your breathing began to pick up slightly, insecurities rising as you realised that you had just woken up. Your hair was probably a mess, and you hadn’t even washed your face, and you were in an old t-shirt and probably smelt bad.
You looked up when Azriel walked in, his eyes widening at the sight of his entire family in your room.
“What are you guys doing?” he asked as his family turned to him instead, asking him a million questions, Cassian practically in tears that he hadn’t been told.
You jumped when you felt a hand on your arm, turning to see Feyre smiling at you, “I’m sorry if we freaked you out a bit,” she said and you went to deny but she continued, “it can be a but much I know I went through similar, except for me it wasn’t eight in the morning!” her voice raised at the end and Rhysand turned around sheepishly.
“You’re right, my deepest apologies,” he said, still unable to keep the smile off his face, “Come to ours for dinner this evening.”
You smiled at him, nodding as your knee bounced to get rid of the anxious energy, muttering goodbye as Feyre and Rhys dragged their family out the room.
“I love you!” Cassian called over his shoulder and you laughed, eyes filling with tears you were trying to hold back.
“Cauldron baby I’m so sorry, are you okay?” Azriel asked and you nodded at him laughing at yourself as you cried.
“I’m okay, really. They were all so nice.” You assured him as he put down the tray he was holding and wrapping his arms around you.
“Then why are you crying?” he asked, his hands gentle as they wiped the stray tears.
“I cry at everything, the other day I cried because someone said they liked my dress,” you laughed and he shook his head, laughing with you.
“You’re in touch with your emotions,” he reasoned,
“I’m a baby. A baby with no social skills that gets overwhelmed very easily,” His shoulders shook with laughter as he lay the two of you down, “I haven’t even had my coffee yet and that was so much social interaction.” You complained, wiping your eyes as you calmed down.
He smiled down at you, kissing your forehead gently, “Are you up for seeing them properly tonight?” he asked, holding you so gently.
“Yeah it’ll be nice,” you assured him, “plus I do think me, and Cassian have to discuss our shared love for you. I think we might start a fan club.”
Azriel laughed, “If you say so.”
“I really do by the way. Love you I mean. Like I love you so much it makes me stupid, when I’m bored I just think about you and things we could do, and it makes me so happy.” You raised yourself up to look down at him as you spoke, pressing a soft kiss to his lips as he smiled dopily up at you.
“I love you so ridiculously much too.” You sat up together, your back pressed against his chest as he passed you your coffee and the breakfast he had prepared the two of you.
The stress of tonight could come later, you were just content to spend the rest of your morning in his arms.
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sunatooru · 4 years ago
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Hewwo :3 I won't lie i saw this idea in an another blog but i loved it too much. Headcanons for Suna, Tanaka, Aone and Kita's reaction if their s/o acts weird and suspicious like she is hiding something and cancel their dates for a week. Then she text them "we need to talk" and they think she'll break up with them, she starts to talk like a break-up speech and they got scared, say something like "we can talk, please don't break-up with me" she says "what? I was just trying to propose marriage!"
Hii I love this idea! If you could tell me where you first read this I would love to read it and see the boys worrieddd and if you see this interact! (I love angsty stuff) x
Hope you enjoyyy and also I have no reason why some are long and some aren’t xx
Suna
* You hadn't replied to him in 5 hours
* He knew you could be busy, I mean you both usually are, but it's almost tradition that you send an "I love you sleepy" at this time
* He has noticed that your conversations have gotten shorter
* He thinks you're probably stressing out and doesn't want to press you
* He tries to set up a date, booking a private dinner room in hopes of relaxing you
* You had an excuse on why you couldn't
* He'll send you morning texts and general messages but you'll rarely reply
* He's not loving the distance
* He decided to go to Osamu's shop and bring you some onigiri
* What he didn't expect was to see you hugging Osamu as he closes the shop
* He's having so many thoughts right now as he walks back to his house that he doesn't realise the buzz of his phone
* It's only a shower later he sees you've messaged him
* "Hey, we need to talk"
* No emoji, no nickname, no suggestions that this is not a break up text
* He could barely sleep, had to force himself to open the door when the knocking woke him
* He felt his heart freeze at the sight of you, your hand fidgeting with your sleeves as you nibble your lips
* He didn't want you to leave him, not when he's loved you so hard, not when he knows he'll never love anyone like he has you
* And then you start to speak, he has to control the pain beginning to ache in his heart
* "So I know we've been together for a long time now and it has been amazing. You're amazing and I hope what I say next doesn't change your view of me because I-"
* "Please don't leave me!" His voice cracked at the end and your eyes widen
* "What?" And you see him looking at you sadly
* "I- please don't break up with me...I can't...even if you like Osamu..I can't love anyone else." Hug him please
* "Rin what? I'm not breaking up with you! I'm trying to propose!" You comfort him and he's shocked
* "What..? But what about last night at Miya's?" "I obviously wanted your best friends help, I'm been trying to propose for days but end up ignoring you. I'm sorry baby."
* God he's softly chuckling now
* "Yes" He grins, kissing the corner of your lips
* "I haven't asked yet"
* "Doesn't matter. It's always been yes."
Tanaka
* You're already his life partner in his eyes, adores you and always messages you
* Gets so excited to communicate to you in any way
* So he's not sure what's he's done to receive the cold shoulder from you
* Everything was smooth sailing until a week ago
* You suddenly stopped receiving his calls, choosing to text and even then they were short
* You've cancelled on him twice already
* Both reasons being you was busy
* Too busy for him?
* He tries not to overthink anything of it
* Doesn't allow doubt to creep in knowing that you two were strong, right?
* But then he notices how your calls with him got shorter, your texts becoming less frequent
* He would zone out thinking about what's going on with you two
* He would reread over you texts
* Gets a little depressed when he realises something is wrong
* He can feel a heat creep into chest, tightening when he sees your latest text
* "We should talk"
* His heart just cracked, he's pacing in his room
* He's not ready, you're his one, he's crying at the thought of you not wanting him anymore
* A day later he sees you in his living room
* His anxiety shoots up the moment you open your mouth, he closes his eyes
* "Don't break up with me!"
* "Huh?" He opens his eyes, you're on one knee as you have a ring box open
* "I've never wanted to. I'm sorry for being distant... I was nervous. Would you marry me?"
* He's crying, relief spreading around him, he digs into his pocket and kneels in front of you
* "I've been saving this for months. I'll take you if you take me."
* I headcanon Tanaka carrying a ring always once he knows you're the one
Aone
* He picked you were acting strange recently
* You would greet him fast and leave faster
* He doesn't really understand what's happening
* As a way to have you around him more he offers you dates
* "There is a new restaurant, so you want to go?" "Sorryyy I'm really busy today but maybe next time!"
* "It's hot today, I can buy you ice cream?" "That would be nice! but I just need to finish stuff"
* He's starting to feel neglected. A whole week has gone by and he hasn't seen you
* He's feeling pain
* He frowns when he sees his lock screen of you
* Starts to write a message but then deletes it
* He doesn't even know who to talk to about it, his sister? His friends? His pet?
* If it he could, he can't voice his concerns, as if he doesn't know if his voice can handle the words or his feelings
* Doesn't know how he ended up thinking about you not wanting to be with him anymore
* "We need to talk" his chest tightens, for some reason those words have him sad
* A day passes and all he can think about is what you want to say, doesn't realise his vision starting to blur until he he feels a tear run down his cheek
* Stares at the ceiling and frowns, he would never hurt you, so why are you?
* The next day you arrive at his home
* He welcomes you silently and senses that your feeling jittery
* "We can talk but please don't break up with me.." he needed to speak first
* "Aone?! Baby no what? I don't.. don't want to break up...I was just trying to surprise you." You mumble
* "I love you. Will you marry me?"
* Enjoy his crushing hug, never worry him again please
Kita
* He knew something was up the minute you didn't send him a good morning text
* He knew something was wrong when you didn't replace the text with kissing and heart emojis
* He knew something was wrong when he felt his head get heavy when you didn't send him a single text the whole day
* When you did finally message him he was relieved but still concerned
* You ended up meeting the next day but he could tell you were acting strange
* You seemed to avoid his gaze, barely relax around him, wouldn't even hold his hand for longer than 5 seconds
* He was not happy, why won't you let him hold you?
* Starts to get annoyed when you pay more attention to your phone then him
* Tries to glance at it but you're fast to not let him see and point to something else
* This goes on for days
* Except he hadn't seen you in those days
* You've either seen his message to meet late or have a reason why you can't
* Reasons he does not believe
* Tries to call you but you decline
* What? He's apprehensive now
* You've never declined before, what's going on
* He start to overthink, do you not like him anymore? Is there someone else?
* Tries to run his errands but can't do a complete job without his thoughts going back to you
* Thinks about how you've been tense around him, less touchy, secretive and he wants to know why
* He want to know why you have been distancing yourself from him
* Why when he thinks about you this last week he feels like crying
* He's suspicious and doesn't want to be
* He thinks about the things he lacked
* The things he couldn't give you that you wanted
* He's fragile but he doesn't want to give you up
* "Can we talk later?" He should feel happy you messaged him but why is he feeling uncertain? Why does he want later to never come?
* And now you're in front of him
* "Shinsuke, I know I haven't been talking to you recently but I've just had things on my mind. I really wanted to talk to you earlier but I just got nervous. You know I love you and we've been together for a while now but-"
* "Please..don't break up with me.." he lets out a sob and your eyes widen
* "Kita no no I'm just trying to propose! Please..don't cry please" you rush to comfort him
* "Propose?" "Uh yeah I was waiting until the ring was done by the jewellers but then got scared you might say no.."
* "Why would I say no?" You raise your brows at him
* "Silly, when have I ever said no to you" he chuckles and then kisses you
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jackrrabbit · 5 years ago
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Runaways /// Dabi x f!Reader (18+)
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Summary: You were like an older sister to Dabi back when the two of you were teen runaways together; now that he’s found you as an adult, it’s not going to be so easy to get rid of him.
A/N: I could write a term paper on all of Dabi’s pathologies in this fic...I forgot how much I love writing smutty angst. Good shit 👌
I was planning on making this a ficlet so it’s kinda structured like that even though it ended up a full-length piece. Also, Dabi says some bullshit about sex work that I absolutely do not agree with or condone so please keep that in mind.
➠ see also: [homeowners association]
Tags/warnings: Dabi victimizes you, noncon/dubcon, light yandere, threats, cheating, NTR kinda?, mentions of past sex work, degradation, rough sex (breath play, impact play, crying), mild violence, very brief mentions of past child abuse in the Todoroki household, sad stuff/angst idk lol, *Daddy Issues by The Neighborhood plays in the background*
Dabi would know you anywhere.
You’re different now, which makes sense. It’s been years. Your old uniform of raggedy denim and hand-me-down leather has been replaced with a prim linen dress, designer label at the collar. You used to dye your hair religiously (it was neon pink when he saw you last) but now it’s styled back to your natural shade, a color he only saw back then when your roots grew out. You smell good, expensive. It does take him a second to recognize you without smudged pencil eyeliner drawn under your eyes like in the old days, but once he catches your gaze the realization is immediate.
It’s you. You. You.
You recognize him too, but your reaction is different—shock, then panic; you tug the arm of the man at your side, urging him to walk faster so you can pass Dabi on the sidewalk. The rejection stings for a second, but he isn’t too surprised. You did abandon him, after all.
Dabi doesn’t let it bother him. You’re not going to get away that easy. He pulls you into conversation, grinning when you reluctantly introduce him to your companion (who is, apparently, your husband) as an old friend from school. You didn’t go to school—Dabi knows that, and you know that, but your husband doesn’t. Which means your husband isn’t aware of your sordid past as a runaway.
This is going to be fun.
Once he knows you’re in town, he doesn’t have much trouble finding you. Your husband is a very wealthy man, well-known in this city now that he’s moved here. So this is what you’ve been up to all these years? Shacking up with some ugly motherfucker who’s at least 20 years your senior because he can afford to dress you up in pretty things and take you on overseas vacations? Dabi has to admit, he wouldn’t have thought it of you. Back when he knew you, you were so sincere, such an idealist, even in your darkest nights.
Then again…you always were willing to get your hands dirty in exchange for a warm meal and a place to sleep. Maybe you haven’t changed as much as you think.
Dabi comes to your house in the middle of the day when your husband’s at work and you’re stuck at home because that’s what you are now, a housewife. From a cocksucking whore to a pretty housewife with a dirty little secret. He’s getting hard just thinking about it as he watches your internal debate on whether to let him in or not. Eventually guilt wins out and you usher him inside, hoping the neighbors didn’t see a known villain lurking on your doorstep.
You make Dabi coffee (and aww, you remember exactly how he likes it). He gets you to talking, and you don’t seen surprised to learn about his current line of work; when he presses you, you admit that you’ve been following him in the news. Your life, in comparison, has been wholly uninteresting: you met a man, he proposed, and you married him. Very little has happened to you since. After a long silence you timidly apologize to Dabi for leaving him behind when you two were teenagers, and he tells you he understands.
He doesn’t forgive you.
Overall, things are good, he tells you. But you know, sometimes he misses the old days. Being on the run with you, stealing food from gas stations, breaking into fancy summer homes and pretending the two of you lived there. Stitching up each other’s cuts, because one of you had always gotten in a fight in the past few days. Sometimes he still has dreams about the smell of the balm you used on his fresh burns…and your cool hands, smoothing gently across the tender skin on his face, but he doesn’t say that.
You look down into your monogrammed coffee mug and tell him you know what he means.
When you turn your head like that, Dabi can see the tiny dots running up the side of your ear where your old piercings have scarred over from lack of use. Do you remember when he gave them to you? You did his first, running a needle through the lonely flame of your lighter (he offered to use his quirk, but it was still hard for him to control then so you declined) and then threading the metal through his ear. You promised it would only hurt for a second, and you were right, so he let you do the others.
Then you offered to let him do yours. Just one on each ear—you already had an impressive collection of piercings, but you wanted to let him return the favor, so he did. You were older and more experienced and had lived on the streets for longer, so when he held the needle in his hand and heard your voice saying you trusted him, it was the first time he ever thought of you as fragile, something delicate, something that he was capable of harming.
He chose twin helix piercings for you, cresting the shell of each ear, silver band rings to match his. When they were done you pulled him to a mirror and asked him what he thought. It hadn’t been long since he got the worst burns on his face (the ones under his eyes, wrapping around his chin and down his neck) and he was still getting used to the knowledge that the ugly, wrinkled scars were never going to heal. “I look like…” he started.
A monster. A freak. A victim.
“A badass,” you said. “You look fucking cool. Any asshole who wants to pick a fight with you will take one look and know you’ve been through worse shit than whatever they can dish out, and that’s something to be proud of.”
Now that Dabi thinks about it, he probably wanted you even then.
…But the longer he reminisces, the more nostalgia’s going to distract him. He came here for a reason, and it wasn’t to have coffee with you and talk about the good old days. What he’s about to take from you—what he’s about to make you give—is long overdue.
You’ve still got a little fight in you. Dabi likes that. But you’ve gone soft, filling out and losing muscle in places where you used to be lean and hard from the constant running and fighting of your old lifestyle. Besides, even if you were as strong as you’d been back then, he’d still be stronger than you—he’s a man now, and it’s incredible how small and weak you seem now that he can look at you as a man.
Were your punches always this light? No way…and your wrists couldn’t have always been this delicate. It’s really no trouble at all for him to wrestle you down to the couch and pin you there so he can tear off your stupid little housewife dress and tug your panties down past your ankles.
Once he’s got you fully naked, though, you pretty much give up trying to fight him off. It’s sad, really—like you’re remembering the past, remembering all the times you let other men hold you and fuck you just so you could have enough money to take yourself and Dabi to McDonalds for a few days. And now look, you’re plenty well-fed, but Dabi’s the one holding you down against your will. Funny how things change like that.
He does appreciate your submission, since it gives him the chance to get a decent look at you. The years have been kind—you look so much healthier than you used to. No more visible ribcage stretching out your skin; no more unhealthy pallor from going outside only at night. Your hands are as soft and manicured as if you’ve never done a day’s work in your life, a far cry from the bitten nails and bloody knuckles of your youth. It’s good to see you like this, and he lingers for a second, drinking in the sight of you and committing you to memory.
Dabi’s pictured this moment for years. He used to think he’d savor it, be sweet with you, slow and gentle to show you what you were missing with the trashy guys you used to hang out with. But now, hey—he’s the trashy one, he’s the one who wants to hurt you and own you and ruin you. May as well act like it.
Your husband doesn’t fuck you like this, does he?
You’re unbelievably tight for a former whore. Dabi can barely hold out when he first pushes into you, licking the tears off your cheeks when apparently it hurts too much for you to keep up a brave face. It takes real effort to fuck himself all the way into you, pushing past the tense squeeze of your muscles while you…well, you’re not exactly wet, but he’ll get you there. As soon as his hips are grinding up against yours, he’s hitching your legs up on his shoulders and pounding you into your stuffy antique couch so deeply that he thinks it might splinter into pieces underneath the two of you.
God, you’re so, so, tight. Dabi feels like a virgin with his cock buried inside you, biting his lip so he doesn’t cum in thirty seconds and thrusting into you with a rhythm that comes from nothing less than pure animal instinct. And you’re getting into it too. Can you tell that your pleading and begging him to get off you is turning into moaning? Can you feel your hips bucking weakly back against his, reverting to the position of the submissive bitch your body remembers even if your mind has tried to forget?
It’s perfect, right and good and perfect, everything Dabi’s been waiting for since he first knew what it was to want someone—no, not just someone. You. It’s always been you. A person never forgets their first love, right? It’s perfect, except—except you won’t look at him, you keep looking off to the side and sniffling, and that’s not going to cut it. So he slows down and wrenches your head back to center and makes you kiss him, sliding his tongue over yours and trying to see if he can feel the place where you used to have a piercing there, too. It’s kind of thrilling, actually—wondering whenever his face dips into yours if you’re going to bite him, if he’ll come back from you with blood in his mouth.
He’s only got to thumb over your clit a couple times before you’re clamping down on him, your body begging to be used and abused. Your husband hasn’t been treating you right, though Dabi doubts the old bastard can even get it up without a blue pill. Sure, you look like a sweet little doll, so darling and delicate and breakable, but Dabi knows you better than that. You’re strong, you can take it. He knows you want it rough, so that’s how he’ll give it to you—and hey, hey, he can feel your cunt quivering around him—you’re cumming, aren’t you? So you like it. You like it.
He knew he wasn’t going to last long before, but when you cum and tighten and squeal so high he thinks you could lose your voice, the tension in his abdomen rises up and he digs his fingers into your hips and—shit, you’re saying something, what are you saying? You’re pleading, begging him not to cum inside—but, ohhhhhh fuck he can’t help it, he can’t, he can’t, he’s cumming all the way deep into your tight little snatch, cockhead jutting up at your cervix, fucking his semen all the way through you until your slit is smeared white from top to bottom.
Stop crying. Dabi’s sick of hearing you cry.
You’re still pretty nimble, even though your current exercise regimen probably doesn’t extend beyond periodic jogs around your neighborhood and weekly pilates with all the other bored trophy wives. He’s kind of surprised when as soon as he lifts himself off of you, you have the strength to roll off the couch and scramble around on the floor for your clothing.
You don’t say anything, which he wasn’t expecting. You don’t scream at him, demand that he leave, or ask him how he could do this to you after everything the two of you went through together. You probably still think of yourself as an older sister when it comes to him.
When you’d first met the scarred kid trying and failing to live off the streets, you knew he wasn’t cut out for this. He’d known pain before, plenty of pain (icy-blue fire roasting the skin off his face—spiral fracture from callused hands twisting his arm behind his back—cold, aching muscles after what he thinks is the fifth hour spent locked in a closet), but he’d never known hunger. Hunger was a different kind of beast, one that would chew the kid up and spit him out and leave him broken if you didn’t take him under your wing, so you did.
It wasn’t like you had much of anything to spare, but you made it work. For a few years. He didn’t talk at first, but he took what you gave him, so you gave him what you could: food, if you had it; a place to sleep at night; the knowledge you’d gathered in your own years as a runaway on how he was supposed to survive in a world that didn’t care whether he lived or rotted away in a gutter. You cared.
Until you didn’t.
‘Going to be traveling alone for a while. Don’t wait for me. I’m sorry,’ your note had read. You left it in his backpack along with $43 in cash—not much, but he knew it was more than you could afford. It was all you had.
And now you have all of this! Don’t you feel lucky? You have the rich husband who barely looks at you, the big house with so many empty unused rooms it makes him sick, more food than you could possibly eat in one lifetime. All of that, and you also have Dabi’s semen leaking out of your cunt. It’s a real rags-to-riches story, he thinks.
Dabi picks a cigarette out of his jacket and you stop fixing up the buttons on your dress to ask him not to light it inside. How will you explain the smell to your husband? Every move you make, every syllable that comes out of your mouth, is weighed down by despair. You look like you’ve been beaten.
He lights the cigarette anyway.
///
Before he had you the first time, Dabi thought once would be enough. Pretty naive, huh?
He makes it his mission to fuck you in every room of your husband’s gluttonously enormous mansion (what with your history Dabi has a hard time thinking of the house as yours, and considering the way you tiptoe around and seem like you’re afraid to move so much as a vase, he suspects you feel the same). There’s a lot of rooms.
When he shows up at your door again you don’t even bother to hear him out, instead just trying to shut it on him, but he forces his way in. You wouldn’t want to make him mad, would you? Not when he’s got such a filthy secret hanging over your head? Will your husband keep paying for your designer shopping trips when he knows you’re a street rat who used to steal everything she wore? Will he still kiss you goodnight when Dabi tells him you used to wrap those pretty lips around strangers’ cocks for money?
If you want Dabi to keep quiet, you’re going to have to convince him the best way you know how. A cockwhore is a cockwhore. That’s not the kind of stain you get to wipe away with time and distance and expensive clothing.
In the kitchen: standing up, your back to his front and your hands barely holding you up on the counter, so hard and rough and deep that the dishes are rattling in the pantry. One of your teacups falls out of the glass china cabinet and shatters into a million fragments in a four foot radius over the tiled floor. Neither of you notice until after. Blunt red lines press themselves into the tops of your thighs where he’s shoving your body into the edge of the counter and there are bruises on your tits from how hard he’s groping you.
In the dining room: sitting on the edge of the table, one of your legs hiked up beside you and the other on a chair while Dabi kneels on the ground in front of you, his head between your thighs and his tongue flicking over your pussy. You start off thinking that you’re going to have to sanitize the entire mahogany surface before you can eat off it again and then he licks his lips and sucks on your throbbing clit and you don’t really think about anything else after that.
In your husband’s study: doggy-style on the floor in front of the fireplace, facedown, his body folded over yours, pressing you so deep into the tacky lion-skin rug that you can taste it. He sighs in your ear—actually, you’re not sure if it’s a sigh or a growl—and his hand comes up to cover yours. You feel the metal stitches and the rough burned skin scraping on your own and it reminds you that it’s him. It’s Dabi.
(A few days after his 13th birthday, the Dabi you used to know told you that he was going to dye his hair—he wanted to be unrecognizable, and you understood, so you found some old scissors and stole hair dye from the pharmacy and you spent three long hours chopping his hair into rough spikes and painting it black. When you washed the dye out of his hair in the sink, your hands were stained inky black too. When he saw, he looked worried and weaved his fingers in with yours and asked if the dye would hurt your skin if it stayed on too long.
And you looked back at this kid—small for his age then, burned by his own quirk, trying so hard to look older and tougher than any 13-year-old should have to be, and you thought to yourself, I would die for you.)
Now you hear Dabi growling out your name and squeezing your hand as he reaches his climax and you think, I would kill you if I could.
///
Dabi saves the master bedroom for last.
Your husband is hosting a party at your house. Dabi knows because you begged him not to come today, looking up at him with those doe-like eyes, offering things you never would have offered if it weren’t important to you that he stay away on this particular evening. But he still comes to crash it. He arrives just minutes before your husband does, and you have barely enough time to tuck him away on the dark bedroom balcony and pull the curtains closed before your husband is opening the door and greeting you.
Dabi settles himself into one of the tasteful Adirondack chairs on the balcony and listens to your voice, or at least what he can hear of it through the sliding glass door. You’re sweeter with your husband than you are with Dabi, and he should’ve known you’d be, but it still makes him hate your husband more than he already did.
On the other hand, there’s something strained and high and nervous in the way you’re speaking. Probably because your husband is standing about twenty feet away from the man you’re cheating on him with.
It takes a while for the two of you to dress for the party, but finally Dabi hears you tell your husband that you’d like to take a little longer to get ready and bid him goodbye. “Love you,” you say to the old man as he leaves the room, so casually Dabi might not have heard it if he wasn’t listening.
Then you’re opening the door and ushering him inside and telling him anxiously that he has to get out before anyone sees him. But, oh, you look nice like this, dolled up in your evening gown and makeup and diamonds, trying to pull him to the door even though you must know by now that he’s not going to leave it there. Instead of following, he backs you up onto the bed and peels down the straps of your dress and slides his hands up under the skirt, and all the while he can’t stop thinking about what you said to your husband.
You used to say that to Dabi.
The first time it was an accident—you’d mentioned it off-hand during a night when it was snowing and his unnaturally high body temperature was the only thing keeping the two of you alive. “God, I love you,” you’d said, draping your arm around his shoulders and pulling him in close to share his heat.
It had stunned him and you could probably tell. Maybe the next few times were just you taking pity on a kid who had never been told so casually and so simply that he was loved. But eventually you meant it, the little love you’s before you went to sleep or when one of you went off to do something alone for a few days—a familial love borne of mutual reliance. For the years Dabi was a runaway with you, you were the only person he could trust, and he knows the feeling was mutual.
Now he wants you to tell him you love him again.
It would be hot, wouldn’t it? You telling Dabi you love him while he forces you into a mating press on the bed you share with your husband. Isn’t that hot? You’re never going to be able to sleep on these sheets again without remembering his hands on your body, his tongue in your mouth, his cock filling you in ways you haven’t been filled since you were 19.
How are you gonna lay next to your husband in this sad cold bed? ‘Cause that old fuck isn’t touching you, Dabi knows that much—if he was, he’d’ve noticed by now that you’re always covered in bite marks and hickeys that he didn’t give you. How are you gonna sleep at night knowing what a nasty slut you are, telling another man you love him?
So say it. Say you love him.
Oh, you’re going to be like that, aren’t you? What did he tell you about being a fucking brat when he’s talking to you? See if you’re still so defiant when he’s got his hand stroking the length of that pretty throat and then sealing down on it, squeezing gently on the veins running up the sides of your neck, not too hard, but enough that you’re probably getting a little dizzy while he continues to fuck into you. Does it hurt? Your face is turning pink. Uh-uh-uh, don’t try to pull his hand off, or he’ll show you just how good he is with his quirk these days.
You’re trying to choke out the words but you can’t quite make them make sense. There’s something endearing about the way your whimpers vibrate through the skin of Dabi’s palm, how he can hear you as well as feeling you. Oh—could you say his name too? He knows you’re feeling all fucked-out and wet and sloppy, every moan rising and falling in time with his cock stretching your pussy open, but can’t you give it a little more effort? He’s sure you can get his name out if you really try.
And if you’re not going to cooperate, Dabi may as well just dig the heel of his knuckle into your windpipe, because you really do tighten up so deliciously when you cough and sputter like that. Fuck, if you keep doing that, he’s going to cum, gonna cum right here in your syrupy pussy and spill it all over your marriage bed—but no, he wants to hear you say it first, so when you’re gagging and turning red and your eyes are watering he finally stops choking you, loosening his grip just enough that his hand is resting on your neck in a lover’s touch. It takes you a second and your voice is so hoarse he can barely hear it, but then you’re speaking and something jumps in his chest—
“I…I love—love y-you, Touya!” you sob. “I love you! I—love you, Touya—Touya—Touya—!”
And ah fuck it’s almost exactly right, your voice saying you love him, saying his real name, a name he hasn’t heard for years because you’re the only one who really knows it anymore—but you’re crying, real heavy sobs while you gulp in frantic lungfuls of oxygen. Your ribcage is heaving underneath him and—god, fuck—your guts are clenching, sucking down on every inch of his cock, every vein—
—oh shit fuck fuck he’s cumming, and he presses his face into your neck, into your hair, kissing you and thinking I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you—
—please stay, forever.
///
When he’s done, he goes for another round just to make sure you’re going to have cum dripping down your thighs when you go back to the party. No panties, unless you want him to walk through the grand foyer with all the other guests on his way out.
You don’t look at him as you fix your dress and your hair and wipe at your smeared makeup. With your eyeliner rubbed down to the bottom of your eyes, Dabi’s reminded a little of how you used to look—and the reminder is doubled when you slide your legs across the side of the bed and limp over to your vanity, walking hesitantly, your hips rocking from side to side. Damn, did he fuck you that hard?
Reminds him of the old days, you shuffling back to the hideout with that same awkward pain in your gait, purple marks around your neck, and a dim smile decorating your face—for his sake. Oh, and cash in your pockets. You’d tell him that the two of you were going out to eat that night and refuse to let him look at the injuries. God, it made him angry, it still makes him angry just thinking about it—angry at the men who bought you for treating you like that, angry at you for letting them. Angry at himself for not being old enough or strong enough or rich enough to stop them.
Anger, yes…and other things too. There had been a sick, insidious part of him that wanted to be in their position. He’d hated himself for it back then, until you left and the desire to punish you for abandoning him got twisted up with the desire to own you and keep you his. Maybe if he let himself think about it, he’d still hate himself for what he’s doing to you.
By now, you’re too good at covering up the bruises. A sweep of foundation and powder passes over each hickey he left on your throat and it’s like he never touched you. You have to push him off the bed so you can strip the sheets and replace them. When you’re done, you tell him to wait a few minutes after you leave to sneak out the back and he makes another half-joke about joining the party and introducing himself to your old man—
—and you shove him up against the wall with all the strength left in you, wrap your hand around his neck, and dig your fingernails under the line of piercings in his cheek. If he even looks at your husband, if he even thinks about it, you’ll rip his goddamn face open, you tell him in a low snarl.
It’s an empty threat (you and he both know who would win in a physical altercation) but there’s real hatred behind it. Dabi hasn’t seen that kind of fire in your eyes since he found out you became a trophy wife. It makes him want to have you again so he does, pulling your arms away from his face, standing and holding you up against the door to your bedroom, forcing you to wrap your arms around his neck and cling to him to keep from falling.
He’s lubed up by his own cum, and the wet squelching of your pussy just reminds him what a mess you’re going to be when you return to high society tonight. Maybe your husband will be able to smell it on you—the cum, the sex, the other man who’s been keeping his darling wife warm while he’s at work.
Well, probably not. If that stupid fucking cuckold hasn’t figured it out by now, there’s not much of a chance he’ll get it on his own. As Dabi sinks into your tight, gummy cunt again, he decides that he might just have to help the process along. A man deserves to know if his wife is being unfaithful, right?
///
Your husband’s office phone number is written on a post-it note that’s tacked to the desk of his study. It takes Dabi 40 minutes and $30 to buy a burner cell phone, leave a message on the man’s voicemail, and toss the burner in the kitchen trash at your house while you’re in the shower.
The message is short and straightforward. Dabi introduces himself as ‘the man who’s sleeping with your wife’, describes the floor plan of your husband’s house and what position he fucked you in for each room, and finally finishes it off with the evidence—the precise size and location of every hickey he’s left on your body that will still be visible by the time your husband returns from work.
Dabi almost wishes your husband had picked up the call—he’d’ve had a good time explaining in pornographic detail the way your tits look under those too-formal dresses, the way you moan when you cum in his mouth, the way you told him you loved him while he choked you out—with your husband in the house, no less. But this is fine too.
Besides, it’ll be so fucking funny if someone else at your husband’s company hears the message before he does.
///
Whore. Your husband called you a whore.
You’ve been called a whore a lot, actually. More than most people. You should be used to it by now. But it’s different when your husband says it. Your husband, the man who rescued you from a life of poverty and starvation, the man who has given you everything you own, the man who slid a ring onto your finger under a wedding arch and promised to love you in good times and in bad. The man you’ve almost convinced yourself you love back.
He called you a whore and slapped you when you tried to explain yourself and shoved you out the door and locked it. You can still hear his voice telling you the only place he wants to see your face again is in a casket.
So that’s why when Dabi comes to collect you, you’re hugging your knees to your chest on your front porch in your shiny lace-edged slip nightdress, hair in a mess around your head and your lip bleeding onto your chin. Your feet are so cold—your husband didn’t even give you time to put shoes on before he threw you out.
The night is cool and dark but the porch light buzzes on for half a minute when Dabi climbs up the steps to come crouch next to you on the doorstep. You try not to look at him, but he tilts your face toward his, electric-blue eyes skimming over the red mark and blue-black discoloration blossoming across your cheekbone; the blood drying on your split lip.
Dabi asks calmly if your husband hit you, and you nod.
Good, he tells you, and his body lights up blue in a roiling cloud of flames. He’s been waiting for an excuse to kill that old fuck.
The fire is like lightning, bright and ghostly in the darkness. The crackling of the flame eats away at the heavy silence of the night and you crawl back from the dry heat of it, sure you can feel your eyebrows singeing from being near. Dabi looks different backed by the inferno—bigger, crueler. Frightening. He reaches at the door but you shout at him to stop.
Why? Don’t you think he should suffer, after what he did to you?
But your fists clench by your sides and you set your teeth and you tell Dabi that if he’s going to kill your husband, he may as well set himself on fire too, because it’s his fault in the first place. And he’s done a lot worse to you than one slap.
Dabi waits a moment, searching your alarmed expression for something, but whatever he’s hoping for you don’t give him and the flames go out. The air smells like smoke and his hands are hot—not burning, but uncomfortably hot—when he kneels in front of you and rubs a thumb over your bruised cheek.
“(Y/N)—” Dabi starts, and then he can’t find a way to finish. So he just gathers you up in his arms and carries you bridal-style down into the lawn and to the driveway, where he’s got a car waiting to take you guys back to his place. You don’t resist, which surprises him again. He thought you’d push away at him, scream, get angry—he thought he’d have to convince you. Or force you, like he usually does. But you just let him deposit you in the seat next to the driver’s.
Before he gets in, he asks you if you need anything from your house. He can go get it for you. See if any balding motherfucker in his forties can stop him. But you just shake your head.
“There’s nothing,” you say blankly. “I have nothing. I…have nothing.”
Just like back then.
“Not nothing,” Dabi tells you, turning forward to the road so you can’t see the look on his face. “You have me.”
///
In the end, he does understand. He understood it the second he held that goodbye note in his hands and knew you were lost to him.
You were 17 when you met him and 19 when you left—hardly older than a child yourself. You barely had enough to provide for your own needs, much less a teenage boy’s. By the time you left, Dabi was more than capable of surviving on his own and already falling into ugly crowds, gangs and syndicates who saw money in his quirk, people you’d sacrificed a lot to keep him away from. He no longer needed you, and it was time for you two to go your separate ways. Dabi understands that.
But now you need him. Just like you needed him when you were fucking strangers for food money; like you needed him when you ran away; like you needed him when you got trapped in this mundane, sparkling-clean life, a life that was never going to fit you. Only this time—this time, Dabi’s old enough for you. He’s not a kid anymore, he’s a man. He’s got an apartment and a good job (well, kind of) and he’s got money. He can provide for you the way you’ve always needed him to.
Dabi’s going to take care of you, and you’re never, ever going to leave.
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thevoidscreams · 4 years ago
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I don't care which slashers/killers you do for this BUT...... May I have some killers hcs meeting their male s/o for the first time? 🥺👉👈
also I know I need to get through what little writings I have planned done and out so I can do these in return and maybe do somethin for ya
I really tried here, I'm sorry if it's not exactly what you wanted. I love these two and I wanted to write more for them. Please let me know if you'd like me to change them at all or if they seem wrong.
Ghostface:
Danny Johnson did not have a tolerant upbringing. His family, despite lacking any sort of faith, was a family built on the foundation that men only slept with women. That's just how it was and that that was how nature had kept things going. When Danny realized he didn't just get hard when looking at naked girls however, life became a lot harder. Literally.
Collage was the escape he needed. He took off and never looked back. Ghosting his family before it was a regular thing. He could finally be who he really was.
The first time he saw you was at a party and he knew something was different. Just introducing himself felt like a life or death situation, he couldn't fuck this up. Some deep part of him needed you to like him, needed you to want him. Danny man not have called it love at first sight but it was definitely something. When you left you took his number and promised to hang out later. You had similar schedules so it would be easy. Right?
You threw a wrench into every plan he'd set in place. All his aspiring affairs with other people died the moment you gave him your name. Your perfect name.
Danny begins every morning thinking about you and would lay down at night with you on his mind till he faded into sleep. Everyday for months you plague his thoughts. Your chill sessions are basically dates in his mind. Even if it's just bumming it on the dorm couches with Mariocart and eating cheap greasy pizza. He cherishes every moment. It has to be more, he thinks, your too nice, too friendly and some of your remarks could be taken as flirting. You're not like this with your other friends. Just with him.
He plans to ask you out but for the first time in his life he's scared by the idea of getting a no. The thought of being rejected by you makes him feel legitimately sick to his stomach. What if he's misread all your signals and your disgusted by his advances. What if you call him all the awful things his old high-school friends did when he came out to them. He needs you to know how he feels, keeping it all in is making him feel anxious.
He was mulling it over in his mind when he got a call, answering it to hear your voice caused a sudden feeling of euphoria within him. "Hey, can we meet up?" Your voice was shaky and you sounded unsure. But Danny agreed right away, assuring you he had the time and was happy to meet up.
You two got coffee together all the time but today there was something more to it. The way you laughed and bumped his shoulder with your fist, the way you smiled awkwardly like you were trying to keep something from him. Danny was getting worried as he looked down at you. "Is everything alright shortstake? You seem off today."
You took a deep breath and looked him right in the eyes. "DannyIlikeyou" you blurted out cheeks red and eyes wide in panic. "I'm sorry I just I couldn't do it anymore," you looked away, "keeping it all in made me feel so awful and I just needed you to know. I'll understand if you don't feel the same way about me and if you don't want to see me again I'll understand that too but-"
He kissed you, right there in front of all of the coffee shop patrons and employees. To his amazement a few people wooped and clapped.
Danny pulled away, he took his coffee in one hand and then your hand in his other.
"Let's go somewhere more private."
He led you to a little pond, there were ducks and water lilies. It was quiet, peaceful, the perfect place to have a heart to heart.
The talk that followed was long and he explained at great lengths how he felt about you.
You confirmed some of the things he suspected, embarrassed by how easily he read you. At the end of it all you were both a bit teary eyed.
"So I guess what I'm trying to say here is, I love you." You did cry after hearing that, so happy and relieved he felt the same way. You kissed him, and he responded in kind, with only the ducks as witnesses this time. They didn't make a peep about the kiss....but they did quack.
Thomas Hewitt:
Tommy knew something was different the first time he met you. You were just a new hire at the meat plant but he couldn't take his eyes off you. The poor thing didn't know what to do. So he just watched. Intrigued by the feelings he felt when he did.
"Good morning Thomas." You'd nod as you passed him to get to your work station. He'd grunt in reply and nod. Happy to see you.
"Hey Tom, lunch time! Thank God for lunch breaks am I right?" Your hand was firm as you passed him, clapping his shoulder. He liked when you touched him, no one ever touched him unless he was also being yelled at. But your touch was different and it was good.
"See ya tomorrow Tommy." You groaned tiredly after a long shift, promising to see him tomorrow. He hoped to see you everyday for the rest of his life.
It was a system, a pattern, it was something Tommy relied on, like a clock, you were on time and followed the routine.
Except this morning, you weren't here. The supervisor was passing by to inspect the work station.
"Where the hell is that freaky bastard at?" He asked pointing to your station. Tommy shrugged, he didn't know, probably the bathroom. "Yeah well you might want to keep your distance, I heard from some the other guys that he's one of them men lovers. If it were up to me he'dhave never come here, but the boss says we're 'short staffed'." The snicker that bubbled up from him was disgusting and he mouthed off a few insults and slurs before walking off to finished his rounds.
Tommy was angry, more than usual at least. He wanted to take that supervisor's head and crush it under his mallet. Instead he stripped his apron off and went to the bathroom. Still a tiny part of him was happy, glad to know he wasn't alone.
The bathroom was never locked, it couldn't be, the lock was broken and building management was too cheap to replace it. So Tommy pushed through the door and listened. A soft rhythmic sound greeted him. Soft uneven breathing, muffled by the walls of the stall. He knew that sound, it was all too personal to him.
He stepped in front of the stall and their sounds turned panicked like they knew they'd been caught.
He knocked on the wood so gently and as it swung open he confirmed his suspensions. Your eyes were red and swollen, a large bruise on your cheek. Tommy saw red as he looked over your generally disheveled appearance.
You were trying to hide the fact that you'd been crying.
"Hey Tommy, what's happening brother? The uh... supervisor send you in here to find me or something?" When you tried to push past him to get to the sinks Thomas stopped you with one big arm.
"Uh you good?" Your voiced trembled and it torn Tommy apart to hear the man he loved so distressed. His big arms pulled you in, holding your smaller body against his massive one. He just didn't care anymore, he didn't care if you knew, or if the whole world knew. People already called him a freak for the way he looked. They were wrong, Thomas wasn't a freak, not for the way he looked or for the way he felt. Neither were you for that matter. When you hugged him back his heart soared. "Thank you." You cried softly, face buried in his chest.
The gentle giant wiped a tear away, carefully as not to agitated the bruise. He grunted and ran his thumb around the edge of the darkening spot.
"Don't worry about that, some of the guys found out about my...well I'm sure you know or have at least heard." Thomas nodded, still holding you. "We should probably get back to our stations."
Tommy was hesitant but he let you go to wash your face and fix your appearance. Things were going to be hard for the both of you. But hard was nothing new to him he was used to fighting for equal footing with others, fighting to get what he wanted always fighting. But this time it really was something worth fighting for. This time it was you.
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maliby · 4 years ago
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Dare | Johnny Suh (+18)
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↬ Pairing: Johnny x F. Reader
↬ Story Genre: smut, fluff
↬ Warnings: mature language, explicit sex scene
↬ Word count: 5.6K
↬ Summary:  You and your friend Johnny have this ongoing string of wild dares. There’s just one thing: you’re never allowed to say no.
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“Good morning class, today we’re going to start learning all about the matrix!” Your Algebra professor happily announced, completely unaware of the horror that swept over his students.
“Wait, is he talking about the movies?” Your friend Taeyong leaned in as soon as Professor Weaver turned his back to write on the board. The rest of the class groaned, having heard tales of horror from their seniors about the subject.
“No, you dufus! Remember last year when Taeil was having a mental breakdown?”
“Oh,” realization dawned over his beautiful face, his big eyes widening even more.
You had had a crush on Taeyong from the first moment you had seen him (just like everybody in your year), but that soon went away as you got to know him and found that you connected better as friends.
“Yup. Matrices…” You sighed in terror while you rested your chin on the palm of your hand. “Maybe Taeil has some notes he can give us-” At that moment, the phone in the back pocket of your jeans buzzed, breaking you out of your conversation. You fished the device from your pocket and looked at the shiny notification bar - it was a message from your roommate, Johnny Suh. 
You looked to your left where said roommate was, sat just a few tables from you, and felt a feeling of dread creep up on you at the sight of his stupid grin. You didn’t have to read the message, you already knew what he wanted.
“Is it Johnny?” Taeyong asked as his eyes followed yours straight to the roommate you both had in common.
“Yes…” you mumbled through gritted teeth, quickly placing your finger on your phone’s Touch ID to unlock it and read the message.
Heeere’s Johnny 🔪 (10:35 AM): dare u to scream “fuck” as loud as you can
“Motherfucker…” you muttered with your eyes closed.
“What did he dare you to do this time?” You turned your phone to him as you noticed him trying to take a peek at it. “Oh no…”
It all started this one night at a frat house party. Back then, you were still crushing over Taeyong and, in a game of truth or dare, Johnny dared you to pick your nose and eat your own booger. Of course, any sane person would have said ‘no’ but, the tequila shots you had downed half an hour earlier made you anything but that. After that, not only did you not look at Taeyong for 2 weeks straight, but also dared Johnny to pick his crush’s nose. You thought he would never agree to it, but as soon as you saw the deed being performed right in the middle of the cafeteria, you knew you had just entered a game with no end.
“Y/N, you can’t do this! You’ll be in trouble!” Taeyong tried to reason with you, already knowing his words would fall on deaf ears.
“More trouble than I was in when I had to write a love poem to Professor Stevens on one of the questions of the Calculus exam?” You flinched as you remembered the talk down you got when Professor Stevens thought you were trying to have sex with him to get a better grade.
“Yeah...that was bad. But still-”
The buzzing of your phone interrupted Taeyong. You looked down at it and read Johnny’s second message out loud to your friend.
Heeere’s Johnny 🔪 (10:38 AM): are u scared? 🐔
You looked back at the sender of the message and felt annoyance grow as you saw him flap his arms around like a chicken and laugh straight in your face.
5 seconds. That was how long it took for you to completely lose your cool, flip Johnny off and yell from the back of the class: “Fuck!” 
You were expecting a couple of things to happen, but nothing could prepare you for the general reaction you got: laughter. Everyone was laughing, from your classmates to your professor. Everyone except Johnny, that is.
“Don’t worry Miss Y/L/N,” Mr Weaver said from the front of the class, breaking your stare down with Johnny. “Matrices aren’t as scary as they seem,” Mr Weaver fondly smiled at you before turning back to the board to write something down, leaving you completely perplexed.
You looked back at Johnny who had his face in a frown and stuck your tongue out to him - it felt good to see his evil plans backfire.
“That was lucky,” Taeyong commented with a little chuckle.
“Tell me about it, feels like the Universe has finally compensated me for all the stupid shit Johnny has made me do.”
“You’ve made Johnny do some pretty stupid shit too.”
“Shhh,” you turned to your friend with your finger in front of your lips, making the universal gesture for silence. “Let’s not talk about that,” you patted him in the back and picked up your pen to start taking notes.
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“I’m back!” You announced as put your keys on the glass bowl right by the entrance of your shared apartment. 
“Taeyong, they were all out of your favourite yoghurt.” You heard noise coming from the kitchen so you moved your way there, but as you went inside you crossed paths with Johnny who was just leaving the kitchen. He was on the phone, and by the expression on his face, you figured that something bad must have happened. 
“What happened?” You asked Taeyong who was leaning on the balcony eating the last of his yoghurt.
“I don’t know, it’s his mother.” 
“Oh no, are his parents fighting again?” 
Taeyong nodded as he licked his spoon and threw the yoghurt cup in the trash.
It was then that you both jumped up at the noise of the door slamming shut - Johnny had stormed out of the house.
Both you and Taeyong had called him loads of times but Johnny never answered, worry consuming you and your best friend. Eventually, you both decided to split up and go looking for him - Taeyong on his scooter and you on your bicycle. 
After half an hour of looking for Johnny in the most obvious places, you started to get desperate. You were starting to run low on ideas of where he could be, but as you passed by a bus stop and saw an ad for a sunscreen with a girl on the beach you suddenly remembered something: Johnny once had told you that when he was feeling down he liked to go to the beach and listen to the waves because it really calmed him down. 
“Why didn’t I think of that earlier?” You questioned yourself (earning a few weird looks from the people at the bus stop) before you changed directions and started to peddle your way to the beach.
The beach was mostly deserted (being that it was December and it was cold), but a brown-haired guy could be seen sitting alone in the sand. 
You parked your bike in the empty bicycle spot, locked it and walked straight to the lonely boy. As you got closer to him and confirmed his identity you couldn’t help but sigh in relief - he sure as hell didn’t look good mentally, but at least he was physically okay. You fished your phone from the pocket of your jacket and sent a quick text to Taeyong before sitting right down beside one of your best friends.
“It’s a little cold for a swim, don’t you think?”
He smiled at you, but his smile didn’t reach his eyes. 
“My parents are getting a divorce,” he deadpanned before looking back at the sea, your instant reaction being to hug him.
“I’m so sorry Johnny.”
“I begged them to just talk it over. I begged them to try but...they won’t.”
“Johnny…” you started in a warning tone. You wanted to tell him that his parents have the right to be happy, but you completely understood where he was coming from - nobody wants their parents to split up. You just wish you could take away this bad feeling from him.
“I know, I know…” he answered, picking up what you were about to tell him. “It’s just...hard.”
You studied his face for a while and noticed his eyes were puffy from crying and your heart completely broke. You and Johnny liked to tease each other a lot, but the truth was that you really cared about each other, more than you’d probably like to admit.
You placed your hand on his back and started rubbing soothing circles. He probably could barely feel them over his bulky black leather jacket, but you couldn’t help but do it. “We’re here for you. Me and Taeyong. You know that, don’t you?”
Johnny turned to look at you and for a brief moment, his eyes held an emotion you had never seen on him. Something you were sure you had misunderstood. Something that, weirdly, made your heart pound.
“I know.” 
Johnny kissed the top of your head and wrapped his long arm around you, snuggling you closer to him and his body heat. You placed your head on his shoulder and just sat there, hearing a mix of his breathing and the waves.
Suddenly your heart started pounding again - something about this felt way too intimate. Replaying the last few minutes in your head made you realize that all of this, somehow, felt like more than a friendship, and that, scared the crap out of you. 
Your own body acted on its own, and when you came to it, you were already backing away from him and saying something to deflect the situation.
“You know there’s a frat party tonight don’t you?”
“Y/N... I’m not in the mood.”
“Johnny Suh, you are going to that damn party, and you are going to have a good time!” You knew he was stubborn and that you probably had no chance of convincing him but then, something crossed your mind; something that would dead sure make him go. “...I dare you!”
He chuckled. “That’s a low blow, using the dares against me.”
“Isn’t that the purpose of a dare though?” You smiled mischievously, making him smile in return.
“Touché.”
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“Woo-hoo! Look at you!” Taeyong whistled as soon as you left your room, all dolled up and ready to go party. “Who are you trying to bang?”
You sneakily took a peek at Johnny who was sitting on the couch and felt a shiver run up your spine as you saw his eyes completely locked on your form. “Mmm, no one,” you lied in a playful tone. 
The truth was you hadn’t been able to stop thinking about that little moment with Johnny on the beach and, as you looked through all your clothes when deciding on what to wear, you couldn’t help but pick your most revealing dress with his reaction in mind.
“Yeah, I don’t believe you,” Taeyong said.
“Well tough luck! Now come on guys, the cab is waiting downstairs.”
When you were grabbing your bag to make your way out the door you felt a tall presence right behind you. He placed his big hand on the small of your back and whispered to your hair: “damn Y/N, didn’t know you cleaned up like that.”
You smiled to yourself and then turned to look at him. “Well, obviously you haven’t been paying attention.” You winked at him and turned back around, leaving to follow Taeyong to the cab while being fully aware of Johnny’s eyes on your back.
When both you and Johnny arrived downstairs, Taeyong had already sat in the front, making you both sit in the back.
The ride was a short one - only 10 to 15 minutes - but, nonetheless, it was full of tension. Taeyong was on his phone the whole time, and the driver kept quiet so, if it wasn’t for the radio the silence would be a deafening one. 
Both you and Johnny didn’t take out your phones, as it would be usual. He just leaned his head on the window and watched the city lights pass by, probably still thinking about his parents. You felt bad. You didn’t want him to feel this way. You wanted him to be his usual funny self and dare you to do stupid shit, but seeing him like this just broke your heart. 
You couldn’t help but stare at his side profile - he was handsome. Of course, you knew he was handsome, you were not blind, but this was the first time his handsomeness was affecting you. You couldn’t help but stare: stare at the way his styled hair brushed upon his eyes, stare at his straight nose and stare at his perky lips. 
Suddenly, an undeniable urge to lean in and kiss him emerged within you. An urge so immense that you caught yourself actually moving towards him, only to be stopped by him turning to look back at you with a charged expression. 
You shared a look for a few seconds. A look that made your insides tingle and your legs press harder against each other. What was happening to you?
Johnny’s hand was reaching over to yours, which was pressed on the seat between the both of you, and you could feel your heart start to beat faster. Suddenly, it felt like time had slowed down and all your focus was on that one hand. That hand that looked strong and delicate at the same time. That hand that looked like it had the power to not only be rough but also gentle. That hand that could grope you, touch you and fuck you so good until you cried for more. That hand that was so close that made you gasp in anticipation.
“We’re here,” the cab driver announced, breaking you from whatever spell Johnny had you on.
“Thanks. Keep the change.” Taeyong paid the driver and left the cab, immediately moving to open up your door.
“Milady,” he bowed, acting as your personal chauffeur.
“Why thank you,” you awkwardly bowed back, still feeling shaken up by the events of the car.
“Okay, let’s move!” Your group started walking towards the house as soon as Johnny joined both of you from the other side of the cab, Taeyong still completely unaware of what had just happened. “I promised Yuta we’d play beer pong with him.” 
“But Taeyong, you know I suck at beer pong!” You protested.
“I do. And that’s why you’re not on my team.”
“What?! That means I’m stuck with her!” Johnny whined from right next to you, making you turn and hit him in his chest, his hard pecks not going unnoticed by you.
“Hey!”
“Shut up Suh, you know as well as I do that you could use a drink,” Taeyong said before he spotted his friend near the entrance. “Yuta ma’ man! What’s up?”
“TY! I was beginning to wonder if you’ve gotten lost!”
“Sorry, Miss Y/N here took 3 hours to get ready,” he pointed back at you, making you hit him in his shoulder.
“Shut up Taeyong!”
“Come on man, did you get a good look at her? I’d wait an eternity if it meant I could look at an angel like her,” he winked at you before getting a sip out of his red plastic cup.
It was public knowledge that you and Yuta had fucked a couple of times. He was pretty hot, and the things he could make you feel with that tongue piercing of his were out of this fucking world. But tonight, you weren’t feeling him all that much - the tiny voice in your head telling you that that’s because you wanted to be railed by Johnny instead.
“Do you really think those cheesy lines are going to work?” Johnny asked out of nowhere with a hint of annoyance to his voice.
Johnny and Yuta were friends and him, more than anyone, knew that Yuta was a nice guy. Sure, he really liked to flirt, but he was also very respectful. So, his reaction made you wonder if he perhaps was feeling jealous. Secretly, you hoped he was. 
“It already did man,” Yuta winked at you once again, catching you a little off-guard. 
“Now, TY told me we’re not going to be on the same team for the beer pong. I’m usually a perfect gentleman, but I’m sorry angel, I can’t let you win.” Yuta came one step closer and picked up your hand and you swore you felt Johnny tense up beside you. “Maybe afterwards you could save me a dance?” He kissed the back of your hand and gave you a look that left little to no imagination of his true intentions - he wanted sex.
“Dream on, Nakamoto,” Johnny interrupted, coming right between you two and breaking your contact. “Stop stalling and let’s go.”
Johnny grabbed your arm and pulled you inside and away from Yuta and his advances. The look of bewilderment on your other roommate’s face didn’t go by unnoticed by you, but you forcibly chose to act like you hadn’t seen it. You didn’t know what it was, but you were liking this jealous side of Johnny and you were certainly curious for more.
“Alright, game on,” you heard Yuta comment before the loud music from inside overwhelmed you and your ears.
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The game went on for a while. You lost, just as Taeyong had predicted. You didn’t mind, really. You just wanted to have a good time and the alcohol from the game was helping you do just that: you were currently in the middle of the dance floor dancing by yourself without a care in the world. You had lost your friends when you went to the bathroom and decided to go to the dancefloor when WAP started playing.
You were enjoying yourself. You were at that fine line where you were feeling the effects of the alcohol but you could still make your own decisions and you loved it.
Suddenly, as you were shaking your ass, you felt a pair of hands on your hips and a crotch on your ass. You wished it was Johnny, but as you opened your eyes and saw him sitting on a couch not far from you, you felt your fantasy crumbling. You turned around to see who you had just ground on and weren’t surprised when your eyes landed on Yuta.
“Hello angel, I’ve been looking for you.”
“Really?” You tried to put a little distance between you, but Yuta just pulled you right back in, your bodies now in full contact with each other.
“The way you look tonight...you’re driving me fucking crazy. I can’t stop thinking about you,” he confessed in your ear, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on the small of your back. “All I wanted to do, was ditch Taeyong and the game and do that thing with my tongue that you like so much.”
Usually, that would be enough to make you lose your shit and pull him to the closest available bedroom, but tonight your mind was elsewhere. “Yuta...I’m sorry but tonight I’m not feeling it.”
His face fell in disappointment and he looked like a lost puppy, which partially made you feel bad for rejecting him, but you had to be honest. 
“You sure?” He asked you.
“Yes.”
“Alright, I’m sorry then...”
He was about to let you go; you could feel his grip loosening when someone yanked him back and away from you, leaving you confused.
“Leave her alone Nakamoto,” Johnny’s voice sounded right from beside you, making your heart jump.
“What the-? What is wrong with you Johnny? Why are you acting so- Oh…” Yuta looked back at you and you could literally see him putting all the puzzle pieces together in his mind. “I get it now.”
“Get what?” Johnny asked.
“Nothing,” you intercepted Yuta before he could say anything. “Yuta, don’t you have to go meet up with that girl?” 
You made some weird faces at Yuta so he could understand what you were doing and, thankfully, he did. 
“Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Have fun!” He winked at you and turned to leave, making you sigh in relief that that whole situation was over.
“That was weird,” your roommate commented. “Was he bothering you? I know he sometimes can be a little...persistent.”
You felt a warmth spread throughout your chest. You knew Yuta could never harm you, but the fact that Johnny was so worried about you made you swoon. Then a thought popped in your head that made the warm fuzzy feeling turn sour: was he worried because he liked you or just as a friend?
“No, it’s okay. He did nothing wrong. Thank you…”
“You’re welcome…”
The mood got awkward for a minute, with none of you saying a word until Johnny broke your shared silence. “I’m gonna go.”
“What?”
“Yeah...I’m sorry, I’m just not really feeling it.”
He looked mentally down and you felt bad for him. Johnny was always the one cracking up a joke - wherever there was laughter, he was always present. He loved to dance and to have a good time, and it broke you to see him like this.
“Hey, come on, dance with me.”
“I’m sorry Y/N, I’m really not feeling it…”
“Come oooon…” You didn’t know how you could convince him, but then an idea popped in your head. “I dare you.”
He chuckled and you couldn’t help but smile at the thought of at least making him laugh. “Playing dirty again Y/N?”
“Well, you aren’t giving me much of a choice now are you Johnny?”
“I don’t know…”
Before he could continue you started imitating a chicken, just like he had done to you in the Algebra class and you couldn’t help but smile at his laughter once again.
“Alright, alright!”
“Yes!” You chanted in victory, promptly grabbing his hands and making him dance with you.
The dance started out friendly, with a few spins here and there, but it wasn’t long before tension started rising up and his hands were on your hips, just where Yuta’s had been. In your head, you couldn’t help but compare the feeling of the 2. Yuta had nice hands, that had certainly made you feel good before, but Johnny’s somehow felt better. His hands felt like he cared for you on a much deeper level. Like they could hold you and never let go. Like they could protect you from anything and completely destroy you at the same time.
As your inner voice went on an entire monologue about the wonder of Johnny’s hands, you found yourself looking him dead in the eyes. The way he was looking at you was making you think wild things, and with the buzz from the alcohol, you couldn’t help but want to act on those thoughts.
Without an ounce of self-control, you let your head move forward and your mouth whisper in his ear: “I dare you to grab my ass.”
Without a second of hesitation, his hands were on your ass and you were exhaling on his ear. The way his big hands were fully grabbing you and massaging you was turning you on so much that you could feel yourself get wet. You wanted nothing more than to have him lift up your dress and finger you in the middle of everyone.
Johnny moved his head near your neck and you thought for a second he was about to kiss you there, but you were surprised when he spoke in your ear. “I dare you to grind that sexy ass of yours on my cock.”
“Fuck.”
Just as he had done with your dare, you promptly complied, turning around and rubbing yourself on his semi. You both were walking on some dangerous paths, but you didn’t think any one of you could go back now.
As you moved your ass to the music and felt him grow harder and harder you couldn’t help but think about what it would be like to fuck him. You wanted him to end you. You wanted him to fill you up so good that he’d ruin any other man for you. You wanted his hands all over your body. You wanted him to grab your tits and play with your nipples. Fuck.
You reached your head back and whispered your next dare to him: “I dare you to play with my boobs.”
“Gladly.”
And then those big hands that were previously on your ass were now caressing your breasts and you felt like you were completely done. 
“Mmmh…” you moaned, not sure if he could hear you over the loud music.
The way he was pinching your nipples over your dress made you feel glad you decided on  not wearing a bra tonight. He was making you feel so good just with his fingers on your nipples and his clothed cock on your ass that your mind once again thought about what it would feel like to have the real deal.
“I dare you to kiss me.”
The dare had caught you off guard. You had been so in a trance by the grinding that your mind went straight to the fucking and skipped the kissing, but now that he had requested it you couldn’t stop thinking about it. So, consumed by desire, you turned around and glued your lips to his. 
You wrapped your right leg around his hip (his hand once again coming to the rescue and grabbing your thigh) and felt his cock rubbing you straight on your clit. The feeling was so pleasurable that you felt like you couldn’t take it anymore, you had to have him now. So you pulled back from the kiss and plead for the last dare: “I dare you to fuck me.”
Johnny didn’t waste any more seconds, he grabbed you by your hand and lead you up the stairs to the first spare bedroom he could find. He then pushed you to the bed, making you fall right on the mattress.
“When I saw you with Yuta I went fucking crazy.”
The way he was towering over you and looking down on you as he confessed his feelings to you was slowly driving you mad. You never imagined you would be where you were right now, but now that you were you could confidently say that you wanted nothing more than this.
“I turned him down because of you,” you also confessed, now suddenly feeling shy and not being able to look him in the eye.
He chuckled.
Suddenly the mattress dipped between your legs as he joined you on the bed, right on top of you. 
“How the fuck did we end up here Y/N?” His fingers gently placed a misplaced lock of your hair behind your ear, catching your breath at his tenderness.
“I don’t know...but I think I don’t want to go back.”
“Good. ‘Cause me neither.”
His lips were back on yours and although the kiss felt different this time, it quickly evolved to something more. His hands ran down your body and went between your legs, his fingers rubbing you over your drenched panties.
“You’re so wet baby. Is this all from grinding against my cock?” His fingers slid under your underwear and easily entered you, making you moan.
“Fuck, yes. I can’t stop thinking about your cock, it’s driving me crazy. I want to fuck you so badly.”
“I want that too.” Something dark took over his eyes. Something that, in combination with his low and breathy voice was making your desire for him grow to even bigger levels. 
“Lately I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.” His free hand pulled down the upper part of your dress, exposing your breaths to his hungry mouth, as his other hand picked up its pace. “I lay awake at night just thinking about you: your smell, your hair, your smile, your eyes, your lips, your body…”
“Johnny…” you moaned his name as you felt that sweet pleasure building up from within you.
“Fuck, that sounded better than I imagined. Do that again, baby.”
Johnny’s other hand joined the one between your legs and began its assault on your little bundle of nerves, intensifying the amount of pleasure you were feeling. “Fuck Johnny, I can’t take it much longer…”
“Cum for me baby,” he instructed as he tried to alleviate himself by rubbing his cock against your leg.
“Ohshit-” you incoherently mumbled at the arrival of your orgasm, your walls spasming around his long fingers.
“You’re so beautiful,” Johnny mumbled against the skin of your belly as he pressed soothing kisses on it.
You smiled and took in a few more breaths so you could talk. 
“Since when are you this romantic Suh?” You asked as you finger-combed his now messy hair.
“Since always. I just only show it to special girls.”
You looked away, suddenly feeling the blood rushing to your cheeks. Damn Johnny Suh and his smooth ass talking.
He chuckled before moving closer to your face and kissing you across your jaw. “Since when are you this shy Y/L/N?”
“Since-” You opened your mouth to answer him but came up short, ending up getting frustrated instead. “Shut up and take your clothes off!”
Your roommate laughed at your annoyance and immediately complied, removing his shirt and working on his pants. You couldn’t help but stare at his buff body: his bulging biceps, his washboard abs and his juicy pecks. You were so lost in desire that you didn’t even notice that Johnny was eyeing you up.
“Enjoying the view?” He teased, the stupid grin on his face driving you mad.
“Shut up,” you said once more, not enjoying the power he had over you.
“Take off your dress baby, I wanna see you too,” he requested as his hand caressed your naked thigh, sending shivers up your spine.
You obliged, quickly removing all your clothes and exposing your naked body to his hungry eyes.
Johnny didn’t say anything, but you could tell by the way his cock twitched that he was affected. So affected, in fact, that within seconds he was on top of you devouring your lips.
Both your hands wandered on each other’s body as he dry humped you between your legs.
“Do you have a condom?” You asked between ragged breaths.
“Fuck, no. But wait a minute,” Johnny reached for the bedside table and opened the first drawer, finding exactly what he was looking for. “Jackpot.”
“Did you know that was there?” 
“No, but I figured. After all, this is a frat house,” he explained as he opened up the package and rolled down the latex condom on his cock.
“Are you ready, baby?”
“Fuck, yes. Just put it in.”
Johnny didn’t wait a second longer. He grabbed his cock, ran it up and down your slit a couple of times and slowly entered you, the feeling of fullness being completely indescribable.
“Oh Johnny, you feel so good.”
“Fuck, tell me when I can move.” Johnny was nuzzled up in your neck, leaving tiny love bites as you adjusted to his cock.
“You can go.”
He started moving slowly at first, a string of moans spilling out from both your mouths, but, soon after, his hips started thrusting faster and harder and you found yourself clawing at his back. 
“Shit,” he hissed before glueing his lips back on yours.
For a moment you both lay there on your own little pleasure bubble, just fucking and swirling your tongues together, with moans and cusses being spilt left and right as you enjoyed each others’ bodies. For a moment, nothing else mattered - just you and Johnny.
“Baby, you’re taking me so well. You are so perfect,” he confessed as he kissed you all over, his words almost making your heart jump out of your chest.
“Johnny, baby, I’m so close.”
“Me too, fuck.”
Johnny was drilling into you so hard that the sound of skin slapping on skin was drowning out the music coming from outside. You were almost there, and as you felt that sweet feeling building up in your core you took a chance to really look at Johnny: the way he bit his lip, the way his brows frowned in pleasure, his dishevelled locks and the way his veins popped on his arms as he held himself up so as not to crush you. He was so fucking hot you couldn’t believe you hadn’t noticed it sooner.
“Johnny, I’m gonna cum.”
“Cum for me, beautiful. I’m right there.”
That was all you needed. Just like that, you were crashing and burning around the man you had considered as ‘just a friend’ for years, your walls milking him dry and making him spill everything inside the borrowed condom.
You didn’t move for several minutes. Johnny fell right to your side and just lay there right beside you, your chests rising and falling in tandem.
What do you say in these situations? What were you supposed to say right after one of your best friends, and roommate, fucked the shit out of you? You had no idea, but thankfully, he took the lead.
“I dare you to fuck me again.”
The dare caught you completely off-guard, just like yours had caught him and you couldn’t help but laugh. For a good minute, that’s all you both did: laugh.
“Alright,” you reached for the drawer and grabbed another condom from the owner of the room. “But this time, I’m on top.”
© maliby, 2020. Do not copy or repost without permission.
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memxntomxri · 3 years ago
Text
𝚏𝚛𝚊𝚐𝚒𝚕𝚎
𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝟮 | 𝗺𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 | 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗲
𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 - bisexual!hinata shouyou x gn!reader, hinata shouyou x miya atsumu
𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦 - angst, break up
𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘤 - hinata shouyou is trustworthy - with everything except for your heart
𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 - 2.4k words
𝘵𝘸 - slightly descriptive nsfw?, cheating (i'm sorry to be doing my children hinata and atsumu dirty this way but this got stuck in my head 😭), major angst, break-up, no happy ending, lots and lots of crying, lots and lots of reader's internal thoughts, atsumu is an asshole
𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 - this is the result of brainrot i had stuck in my head after reading chapter 18 of SabbyWrites' A Study in Depravity. HAIKYUU BOYS ARE NOT CHEATERS - I REPEAT, HAIKYUU BOYS ARE NOT CHEATERS. BISEXUAL PEOPLE ARE ALSO NOT CHEATERS. i just couldn't resist writing this lmao
also, i'm doing my best to make this a gender-neutral reader, but it might lean more towards AFAB/non-binary readers since i'm both ashelkgjkdlkjf male-identifying readers i'm sorry
thanks @meiansmistress, lou (LouEve_094 on ao3), lena, and emmy (Noisy_Emmy on ao3) for betaing! your feedback helped me a lot
𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙤𝙧𝙨 𝙙𝙣𝙞 - there are some descriptive scenes of smut in here 👀 shoo, shoo
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆   。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆
Hinata Shouyou is trustworthy.
You know this.
It's the reason you met, after all.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
The summer you moved to Miyagi, following your father's dream of teaching in a little town similar to the one he lived in as a child, you were unhappy. Who could blame you, after all? You had a comfortable life back in Osaka, and unlike your father, you were a city dweller at heart. It was also the middle of your first year of high school—who wanted to transfer schools, let alone across prefectures, in the middle of a school year?
It was hot in Miyagi, and when the moving truck broke down on the side of the road, the entire family piled out and sat on the curb. Just your father (who you were still mad at), your mother, and you. That was what it had always been. Sure, you had friends, but somehow the friendships never got too deep. You were willing to bet that within a month, there would be no texts other than the occasional New Year's greeting or "happy birthday" from your so-called friends back in Osaka.
And don't even get you started on romantic relationships. It wasn't that you weren't attractive, or that you weren't easy to get along with—it was just that there was never anybody. Yes, you had liked people before, but nothing had ever come of it.
Your mother piped up, saving you from your dark thoughts about the state of your relationships with other people. "Y/n, love, can you go back down the hill again? I think we saw a konbini a bit that way, please buy some cool drinks." she says, depositing coins in your outstretched hand. Oh well, something to do, you supposed.
You strolled casually down the road, sweating buckets. When you pushed open the doors of the konbini—Sakanoshita Store, you noted, it definitely didn’t look like a konbini—opened, you basked in the cold air of the air conditioner for a bit. As you stood there, looking a bit dumb with your arms outstretched, you felt a weight barrel into you from behind.
With a bang, you fell forward, the weight landing on your back. "Ow!" you cried, rubbing your right wrist, which had unceremoniously made contact with the ground, pain shooting up the limb. You twisted around to glare at whatever had so unceremoniously bowled you over. You were met with the sight of wide, brown eyes and flushed cheeks. "Sorry!" the boy squeaked, getting off of you quickly. "So sorry!" You frowned and got up.
"Watch where you’re going, okay?" You were a few centimeters taller than him, you noted.
He started blabbering, talking about how he needed to get the first-aid kit because a "Stingyshima" had "accidentally" ran into "Bakageyama" and this "Bakageyama" now had a bleeding knee and that he was the fastest runner in their volleyball club (he was strangely emphatic about this point). By the time he was finished rambling, you were chuckling slightly. It was obvious that he hadn't meant anything by running into you, and it was actually kind of endearing how earnestly he was trying to explain himself.
You held up a hand, stopping him from continuing to ramble. "Y-you aren't mad, right?" he asked anxiously. You smiled and shook your head slightly. "It seems your team trusts you to help take care of your friend, so why don't you grab the first-aid kit and go help him?" You suggested gently.
He nodded quickly and darted behind the counter, grabbing a white box. As he jogged away, he seemed to remember something and turned around to holler at you. "My name's Hinata Shouyou! I'm a first year!" he introduced himself in a bright voice.
Just inside the konbini, a small smile slipped across your face.
Hinata Shouyou, huh. He seemed nice.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
Hinata Shouyou is trustworthy.
It's the reason you fell in love with him.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
The first day of school, you meet Hinata Shouyou again. And again. And again. He somehow seems to pop up everywhere you go—not that you're complaining, he's entertaining and nice—and soon, you think you can count yourself as his friend.
You go to his game against Aoba Johsai, then Shiratorizawa, then you're hugging him as he jumps up and down, celebrating their win. That’s the first time your heart jumps when you look at him, haloed by the lights of the gym.
Slowly, you feel yourself falling in love with him. Not just falling for him, no, because Hinata Shouyou will not let anyone do anything in halves, especially not falling in love. Shouyou, to you, (because by then you were on first-name basis) is someone you can rely on, someone that is always there, like the sun, trustworthy.
And because he is always there, it's also easy to confess to him in your second year. You know him well enough by now to know that even if he doesn't feel the same, nothing would change about your friendship except for the addition of unspoken words. And you think that he might love you back, if the lingering glances and brighter smiles are any indication.
Your guess is right, and by New Year's break, the two of you are a happy couple.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
Hinata Shouyou is trustworthy.
It's why you let him go, if only for a little bit.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
When Shouyou left for Brazil, you took a break from each other. To be honest, it was your idea.
It wasn't that you didn't think that you couldn't trust him ten thousand kilometers away—it was that you knew you would hold him back. He was going to Brazil to chase his dream, and having a tether to his hometown would only slow him down. It hurt, having to say goodbye at the airport, but somehow the two of you got through it.
You still talked—a little more than "just friends" should—but you were careful not to let him think that you were together.
Shouyou was meant for greater things, and back then, as an insecure, just-barely-adult going into medical school, you weren't sure if you fit into the picture.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
Hinata Shouyou is trustworthy.
It's the reason why you let him back in.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
When Shouyou returns from Brazil, the first person he visits is you. You, all the way out in Osaka, pushing yourself to your limits as you study for med school. When you open your door and see him standing there, smiling as bright as ever, you fall into his arms—both literally and metaphorically. It turns out, even two years later, you trust him to catch you.
It was all too natural for you and Shouyou to get back together, and by a stroke of luck, he joins the MSBY Black Jackals, right there in Osaka. You move in together, his slightly larger salary allowing the two of you to rent a bigger apartment.
Yes, it's hard work being in a relationship again, but you like having Shouyou to return to every night after your shift is over. You wake up early every morning to make the two of you breakfast and lunch, and Shouyou always has dinner waiting for you when you step back in the door, often also staying up so that you can talk.
You're content.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
Hinata Shouyou is trustworthy.
It's the reason why you think nothing of his closeness with his teammates.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
Shouyou has always been a people-magnet. Even back in high school, everyone loved him. Shouyou is bisexual. You know this. He’s always had more than enough love to give back, too, and his bisexuality had never impacted your relationship. Why should it, when you’re every bit as queer as him? Your relationship was strong, and you believed in it. That's why, at every team dinner that he takes you to, when someone else inevitably takes the seats next to him instead of you and you're relegated to a corner, you don't worry about it. Shouyou loves you, and it doesn't matter where you sit for a couple of hours.
Yes, Miya Atsumu is a bit aggressive whenever Shouyou compliments him, throwing a smirk over his shoulder at you triumphantly, but you chalk it to them being good friends and Miya-san wanting to get to know you better by having a little friendly competition, and that's okay.
Yes, Shouyou starts going out with his team more and more, but they're his team. He's supposed to be close with them.
Yes, you start to feel a little neglected, but it wasn't as if you were the most attentive back when you were still struggling through med school.
And anyways, Shouyou always makes time for the two of you on Saturdays, your designated date nights. You have trust in your relationship, in its rock-tight foundation built upon years of knowing each other.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
Hinata Shouyou is trustworthy.
It's why you believe his words.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
One Friday, after an especially busy shift at the hospital that got cut short for you when a coworker unexpectedly came in to fill in for you, you decide to head home early and get some rest, maybe cuddle with Shouyou while watching those romcoms you both enjoy.
You had told him that you'd be home late that night, and you hoped that you could surprise him with some dinner. So, you swung by his favorite yakitori place and ordered dinner, driving home as fast as you safely could.
As you open the door to your apartment, you hear the distinctive sounds of sex, skin slapping on skin, grunts and moans, high keens. You frown. Maybe Shouyou was watching porn? He sometimes liked to get himself ready (the two of you enjoyed the occasional pegging) before you got home. You drop the food on the kitchen table and put your jacket on the hook.
"Love, I'm home!" you call out softly. No response.
Frowning deeper now, you move towards the bedroom door. Just as you're about to open it, you hear something that stops you cold.
"A-ah, Atsumu!" It's distinctively Shouyou's voice, and suddenly, you can't move anymore.
Shouyou, who told you you could make it through med school.
Shouyou, who made you yakisoba and miso soup whenever you were stuck studying.
Shouyou, who whispered sweet nothings in your ear every morning as the two of you made breakfast.
Shouyou, who is currently in bed with Miya fucking Atsumu.
You want to get up, you want to slam open the door, you want to demand answers, but somehow, you can't get your legs to budge from the spot in the ground they've rooted themselves to.
Then,
"Who do you love, Sho?" Atsumu growls.
Your heart skips a beat.
No.
No.
You pray to all the gods you know that what's about to pass Shouyou's lips will miraculously stay trapped in his throat, but it seems like the gods don't feel kind today.
"Y-you, Atsumu, you!" you hear Shouyou cry.
Your heart shatters into a million little kaleidoscopic pieces. Tears start running down your face, hot, involuntary, painful, because they represent the six years of a beautiful relationship down the drain, because nothing will ever be the same, because Shouyou is cheating on you.
Finally, your legs decide to move again. It seems like someone else is controlling your body as you walk towards the door, opening it with a shaking hand.
Shouyou is pinned down by Miya-san on the bed, legs thrown over his shoulder, as he slams into him.
The door bangs against the wall.
Shouyou looks up, and when he sees you, his face floods with guilt.
You don't say anything. You just stand there, tears flooding down your face, betrayal evident in your expression.
"Y-y/n!" he says. "I-I- I swear, this isn't-" he begins.
You cut him off. "I don't want to hear it, Shouyou." you spit.
Miya-san chuckles. "Who are we kidding, this is exactly what they think it is. What, did you think that you would be enough to satisfy Sho? You, with your infinitely busy schedule? You, who has no clue about volleyball?" he says, cutting into you.
"Atsumu, stop!" Shouyou says, frantic. He can tell that he's going to lose you, but he's not going to go down without a fight. "Babe, I love you, please-" he says, getting out of Miya-san's embrace and moving towards you. You sidestep him, holding a duffel bag with a change of clothes.
You stand there, looking at the scene, chuckling darkly inside your head. Just a scorned lover, a man, and his side-piece. You take a deep breath.
"You know, Shouyou, if you fell in love with someone else, you should've just told me. I trust you to be honest. I'm leaving—because even though you might love me, you're in love with Miya-san." you said.
Shouyou looks stricken with guilt, but you know it's from lying, not because he loves you anymore. Your laugh is broken and rough on the ears. "You think I didn't hear you? Oh, Shouyou, I heard more than enough. Have a nice life, and I hope that you remember how you broke me. I hope it fucking haunts you to the day of your death," you hurl at him.
Because even though at that moment you're screaming at him, you know that you still love him, that you’ll always will love him, and that you will carry this scar for the rest of your life. And even though you love him enough to leave now, to let him be with the person he loves—you still have enough love for yourself to hope that he bears some of the weight of this horrible, messy end too.
And with that, you walk out the door.
⋇⋆✦⋆⋇  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇
But you're wrong.
Hinata Shouyou might love Miya Atsumu, but he still loves you more.
Years later, looking back, he comprehends that he didn't just break you. As he stares at his empty apartment, devoid of a lover—because what you said was true, he still carries the guilt, the memory of your tear-stained face, the recollections of your golden time together that ruined any relationship he might have had before it started, the echo of your absolute trust in him,
—Hinata Shouyou realizes he ruined himself too.
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆   。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆
© ʙᴇᴛʜᴇʏᴅᴏᴄʀɪᴍᴇᴡʀɪᴛᴇꜱ 2021 - ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴏʀ ʀᴇᴘᴏꜱᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜᴏᴜᴛ ᴄʀᴇᴅɪᴛ
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cursedwriter · 4 years ago
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Dancing with your Ghost - Fushiguro Megumi
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Jujutsu Kaisen Masterlist 
Warnings: Deals with death, Megumi has various breakdowns, it’s just really sad over all... sorry for making you cry in advance! 
Words: 4.9k
Author’s Note: Kind of inspired by this song: Dancing with your Ghost - Sasha Sloan // Also, when they dance, I kinda imagined them to dance to this: Technicolour Beat - Oh Wonder 
“Is he still in there?” Yuji pointed at the door by the end of the hallway. Gojo was walking in his direction, his expression unreadable.  
“No matter what I tell him, he won’t come out.” His voice sounded tired, almost worn out. The sight must’ve been hard for him to bear. Itadori gulped. He wasn’t sure if he could take it. “You should try talking to him. Maybe he will listen to you. We both know he would regret it if he missed the ceremony.” Gojo patted Yuji on the shoulder, hand lingering for a few additional seconds in silent comfort.
“I’ll try my best,” Itadori nodded, though, he sounded more hopeful than he was. This was going to be rough.
Soon after, Gojo disappeared behind the corner and out of sight. His shoulders were slouching and his head was hanging low as if he couldn’t walk upright. This was hard on everyone. But the person who had it the worst of all was…
“Fushiguro, can I come in?” Yuji knocked on the door three times. No answer. He tried again. This time more forceful. “Hey, Megumi! It’s me, Yuji! Do you mind if I come in?” Still no answer. Itadori sighed, but he pushed the door open anyways, peering into the dimly lit library of the Jujutsu Tech High school. Admittedly, he’s never been in here before. Yuji wasn’t really the non-fiction reader… or anything that wasn’t manga, really. But upon entering the room, he couldn’t help but gawk. The shelves were stacked to the max, piling up above his head in a seemingly endless supply of books. There were books everywhere. The amount of knowledge that was stored in here was immense. And all about curses and jujutsu? Incredible! Maybe he should’ve come here sooner. He bet that there had to be at least a dozen books about Sukuna here somewhere.
“It doesn’t make any sense. It doesn’t make any sense.” Itadori was pulled out of his thoughts by the repetitive mantra that was coming from somewhere behind a shelf. He followed the sound that was mingled with quiet sobs and he had to force himself to keep walking. This was more terrifying than facing all the curses of this world together.
“Megumi?” He peered around the shelf, finding his friend sitting on the old wooden floor, frantically flipping through a book with yellowed pages that seemed to be falling apart at the seams. It must’ve been ancient.
“No sense, no sense, no sense,” he repeated over and over again as if that phrase was the only thing keeping him sane.
“Megumi?” Itadori tried again and finally Megumi’s head snapped up and he looked at Itadori like a deer caught in headlights… only way worse. His eyes were bloodshot with dark purple circles underneath them. A stark contrast to his sickly pale skin. Briefly, Yuji wondered if Megumi had slept at all since it happened. Tears were streaming down his face and it felt like they would never stop. An endless river of sorrow and despair. Yuji was sure he heard his own heart shatter in his chest as he looked at his best friend. He wished he could take some of the pain away. Even if it was just a little, but of course that was impossible. “The ceremony will start soon and-“
“That’s stupid!” Fushiguro cut him off harshly, his voice hoarse and quieter than usual. “Why would there be a freaking ceremony when she’s coming back?!”
“Megumi, she-“
“No! Stop it!” He yelled, throwing the book he was reading against the opposite wall. “Stop it! Shut up!” He pressed his palms against his temples as if he wanted to crush his own skull. “I’ll do it, you’ll see! All of you! You’ll see! I’ll bring her back! I’ll bring her back, okay?! I will – I will!” He repeated it over and over again and it was apparent that he wanted to proof himself right more than anything else. Maybe making him believe would help ease his pain? Should he encourage him? No. Despite wishing that he could provide some words of comfort right now, Itadori knew that false hope would be the cruelest thing he could offer. No matter how much it hurt, but Megumi couldn’t go on like this… searching for something that wasn’t real.
“Megumi, please. You’ll regret it if you don’t come,” Itadori tried again, picking up the book that Megumi had thrown away. He flipped through the first pages and he could already tell that the answers Megumi was searching for weren’t in this book. It was mostly about how sorcerers could reincarnate as curses if their dead bodies weren’t handled properly. If they died you had to make sure that the last hit was infused with cursed energy. Usually, that took care of things. However, if they died of natural causes, diseases or accidents there was a special ritual, a ceremony that made sure their bodies were put to rest accordingly. Kind of like a funeral, but then again, not quite. This was the ceremony Fushiguro refused to attend, even though it was highly valued among sorcerers. It was a way to pay your last respects, value their accomplishments and thank them for their sacrifice. He probably refused to go because that would make her death final and he would be forced to move on, no matter how hard it would be… and it was going to be very hard.
“SHE’S COMING BACK, DAMMIT!” Megumi yelled at him, reaching for another book that was stocked in a pile he’d built himself. The tower crumbled with the way he yanked it out, dozen books falling to the ground, scattering to their feet. It was eerily quiet for a second, Yuji didn’t dare to speak. The atmosphere so thick, he doubted even Maki’s demon blade could cut through it. And then, right when he wanted to say something, anything really to get rid of the suffocating silence in the room, Megumi started sobbing. Not like before. Impossibly, it was even worse. His whole body shook with the action, hands that were clinging onto the book were trembling and despite him hanging his head low, Yuji could see the frequent tears that were hitting the old worn out pages of the book, blurring the ink further, making it almost unreadable.
Hesitantly, he took a step forward, but he wasn’t quite sure what to do. Should he hug him? What could he even say? Should he call for someone? Gojo-sensei? Would he know what to do? Or Nobara? Or, wait! Y/N always knew what to do when it came to him… Oh, right…
Yuji slapped his forehead with the palm of his hand. How could he forget?! It really didn’t feel real yet, huh? Itadori tried to swallow the big lump in his throat as he crouched down and gently took the book out of Fushiguro’s shaking hands. He looked so fragile, as if a single slap to the wrist could break his arm.
“I just don’t get it,” Megumi whispered. His voice sounded far away, as if he was underwater or as if Yuji had cotton in his ears, muffling his voice to a point where it was almost incomprehensible. “It’s just so unfair.”
Yuji placed the book on the ground beside him, skipping over the title “Resurrection and the balance of the world”, it read. He gulped again. Could it be possible?
“I know it is.” He laid a comforting hand on his shoulder and another muffled cry escaped Megumi’s mouth. Yuji had seen a lot over the course of just one year, but not once has he witnessed such utter despair. The sight pulled on his heart strings in ways he couldn’t even explain.
“She fought against the most heinous creatures every day and you’re telling me she died because some fucking asshole thought it was a good idea to drive while being absolutely shit faced?!” Some of his words were swallowed by his sobs, but Itadori understood him well enough. “I refuse to believe that! I refuse to accept that!”
Momentarily Itadori was thrown back to the moment they got the call, he remembered it all too vividly. The shock, the confusion and his scream…
“I’m sorry for your loss,” the nurse led them into the room. The air was chilly and it smelled like disinfectant.  The stench so unbelievably strong, Megumi thought he might throw up. It burned in his eyes and nose and he distantly felt his cheeks getting wet. He couldn’t tell if it was because of the smell or of what was to come… at this point, it still felt like a sick joke, some twisted game or prank. Just not real, like a dream, a nightmare he would wake up from any second.
There was a single bed in the middle of the room, the body underneath covered by a white cloth. Gojo, Nobara and Yuji gathered around it, hands clutched together in front of them as if they were silently praying. Megumi hesitated. He stood in the doorframe, looking at the scene in front of him and nothing seemed to make sense anymore. Everyone was crying. Even Gojo seemed more tense than usual and he was sure he saw a stray tear slip from underneath his sunglasses.
The room was silent, except for the door falling shut behind him as the nurse left them to mourn in peace. This was a dream, right? A nightmare? How could it be anything else?
Megumi’s footsteps echoed off the walls as he hesitantly approached the bed covered in white sheets.
This is just a dream. This is a nightmare. You’re going to wake up any second now. Just wake up. Wake up! Wake up, dammit!
But he didn’t wake up. Not even as he reached for the white cloth. And he didn’t wake up as he slowly lifted it up. He didn’t wake up when everyone sucked in a sharp breath. And he didn’t wake up as Nobara’s knees buckled and she fell to the ground sobbing. He didn’t wake up as he laid his eyes on your peaceful but lifeless face.
Megumi didn’t wake up. But God did he wish he did.
He stood there for what felt like an eternity. Studying your features. How your hair was softly flowing on the pillow, how your lips were slightly parted as if you would wake up at any given moment and tell him something important. But he also noticed that your cheeks lacked their signature pinkish tint and your lips were more blue than their usual vibrant red.
His hand inched closer to your face, connecting to your cheeks and adoringly caressing it. It was cold underneath his touch. Your skin feeling more like wax than it felt alive.
No one said anything, the only sound was Nobara’s quiet sobs that she tried to stiffle to the best of her abilities. Everyone watched Megumi and no one knew what to do. Neither of them has ever felt so helpless. Even Gojo was rendered speechless at the heartbreaking sight in front of him.
And then, everything slowly started to sink in…
She’s gone.  She’s gone. She’s really gone! You’re not waking up! Why aren’t you waking up?! Wake up!! No, no, no. This can’t happen. This can’t happen. This isn’t happening! Tell me this isn’t happening?!
Didn’t I just talk to her this morning? Didn’t we talk about going to the beach as soon as it got warmer? Didn’t we make dinner plans? Didn’t she boast about a new recipe she wanted to try? Didn’t this just happen? And you’re telling me that all of that is just… gone? Just like that? In a moments notice… poof?! Evaporated into thin air? You’re telling me that?
“Wake up, dammit! Wake up, dammit! WAKE UP!”
Everyone stared helplessly at Fushiguro. At first no one knew if he was talking to himself or you, but then he started desperately shaking your shoulders, repeating the words over and over again. “We wanted to go to the beach, remember? You told me you couldn’t wait! Come back, and I’ll drive us right now! Come back! Come back to me, please! Please!”
Gojo couldn’t bear the sight anymore. The way he shook your body as if that would change anything. With a few long strides he closed the distance between him and Megumi and pulled him away from the bed. He was thrashing at him, screaming in his face to let him go, but Gojo didn’t listen. He gladly took a hit or two if that meant Fushiguro could get at least some of his frustration out of his body. To Gojo, the room itself was a hard place to be in – for obvious reasons. The energy here made him feel uneasy and on edge. The amount of cursed energy gushing out of Megumi was immense and almost unbearable. He had to get his emotions in check or else…
Megumi continued to yell and thrash. “Let me go, you bastard! Let me go! I need to see her! I need to see her!”
“I understand that this is hard for you, but you need to calm down!” Gojo’s voice was stern. This was probably the first time ever that he actually put on the façade of a responsible adult. Nobara and Yuji watched the two with wide eyes, but didn’t interfere otherwise. “If you keep this up, you might end up cursing her! Do you want that?!”
“Let me go! Let me go!” Megumi wasn’t listening.
“Megumi, snap out of it!” Gojo’s palm connected to Megumi’s cheek, his flesh burning hot where it had connected. For a moment, the room was silent again. Only Megumi’s labored breaths broke through the thick tension.
“You bastard!” Megumi launched himself at Gojo with all his strength, but that was exactly what Gojo intended. It was better if he directed all his energy towards him than having it leak out of him uncontrollably. Otherwise he had the potential of manifesting a new special grade curse that neither one of them wanted to deal with, especially if you were to be reborn as said curse.
Megumi stopped his relentless attacks, knees buckling under his weight as a single agony filled screamed echoed off the walls…
Megumi slowly opened his eyes. His head was aching, blood soaring in his ears. What happened? He looked around himself. The room was dark, only illuminated by the moon light that peered through his partially closed blinds. He was laying in his bed, the room a mess just like he remembered. That was unlike him. Well, ever since that day he hasn’t been himself at all. Now, he more or less felt like an empty shell, existing but not alive.
He groaned, sitting up while he rubbed his temples, hoping to get the relentless throbbing to stop. Ah, that’s right. A few flashes of the previous events reminded him of what had happened. Megumi’s frustration and anger had gotten the best of him and he started throwing books, ripping them out of their shelves and even tearing some of them apart when he couldn’t find the answers he was looking for. Yuji had to call for Gojo and he in turn had knocked him unconscious.  
Megumi huffed. Great. Now he was probably not permitted to go to the library again. He should really start thinking before lashing out like this. No, matter, though. If push comes to shove he’d find a way in and if it’s the last thing he did. He didn’t really care anymore anyways. What’s the worst that could happen? Expulsion? That was nothing.
He peeled the covers back, his shirt sticking to his body uncomfortably. Maybe he should take a shower before he went back again.
Reluctantly, he got up and walked towards his bathroom, mindful not to trip on anything that was scattered on his floor.
Once he was there, he turned the shower faucet on, letting the water heat up while he stripped out of his clothes. His head was still killing him and his whole body ached. He shivered, even as he got into the shower and the hot water burned his skin. He was still cold. For some reason he didn’t seem to be able to get warm anymore, as if you took all of his warmth with you, when you left him.
“Ew, stop doing that,” you laughed wholeheartedly as Megumi shook his wet hair in your face after coming out of the shower. “Seriously, are you a dog?”
“No, but I love hearing you laugh.” Megumi wrapped his arms around you, pressing your back against his naked chest as you both watched your reflection in the mirror. “I really love you, Y/N. So much,” he whispered in your ear, not taking his eyes off the mirror. He could see the faint blush on your cheeks and he placed a soft kiss to the nape of your neck to emphasize his words.
“I love you, too.” The smile on your lips and the way your eyes sparkled with joy, filled his heart with warmth and light. He could bask in it for all eternity and he would never get tired of it.
Megumi turned the water off, still shivering. It was to no use. His skin was burning red, though, and the whole room was filled with steam and yet, he had goosebumps all over his body. His teeth started clattering as he dried himself and he put on new clothes.
The clock on his bedside table told him that it was three in the morning. He felt like he forgot about something… something important. What was it again?
And then his eyes widened in shock. No, no, no.
“Hey, look!” Megumi felt your slender fingers wrap around his wrist, your warmth immediately warming his cold skin. You tugged him gently and he followed you. It didn’t take long for you to reach your desired destination and you stopped, eyes shining with awe in them as you watched over the city, lights sparkling and illuminating the darkness. Megumi couldn’t deny that the view was breathtaking, but he couldn’t keep his eyes from constantly looking at you instead. The way your face lit up, the way the lights danced on your face and how your cheeks were always tinted in their usual pinkish color, made him fall for you all over again. His heart hammered in his chest and his pulse picked up. Butterflies assaulting his stomach in the best way imaginable and he felt like he was floating above ground. Never has he felt so happy. “There! It’s starting!” You beamed at him as the first flash of light painted the night sky in a bright blue color, then it changed to red and then green. The sound of other fireworks being set off rang through the otherwise silent night. Here, on top of the mountain away from anyone, it was the most peaceful place he could imagine. But he wasn’t sure if it was only because of the view and the fact that no one was around or if it was because you were here. Whatever it was, he didn’t dream to fight it. The feeling so foreign yet so welcomed.
Suddenly your hand appeared in his line of vision and he didn’t hesitate to take it. What he didn’t expect was you starting to spin around. It took him a moment to catch up. “C’mon, Megumi, what are you doing? Don’t just stand there so stiffly! Dance with me!” You urged him on and Megumi felt his cheeks heating up in embarrassment. He could only hope that you couldn’t see it.
“There’s no music, though,” he said, trying to find an excuse to not make a complete fool out of himself. You see, Megumi wasn’t a dancer. Give him a choreographed fighting formation and he could do that no problem, but moving his feet to the rhythm of a song? Nope. That was sure to end in him tripping over his own feet and in the worst case break his leg or arm.
You rolled your eyes at him, but instead of saying anything, you reached into your back pocket to get a hold of your phone. It didn’t take long and the sound of the fireworks was mixed with the soft tune of a song that he didn’t know. “Better?”
Well, not really… Megumi scratched the back of his head, unsure. Better to come clean, I guess. “You see… I can’t really dance… like at all,” Megumi stammered.
“So what? I can’t dance either,” you laughed, spinning around and jumping up and down like it was the most normal thing to do. The smile on your face never faltered and you did another spin, throwing your hands up in the air, moving them around awkwardly. Megumi couldn’t help but laugh at your awkward movements. You looked so silly, it was hilarious. “See? Now it’s only fair that you make a fool out of yourself, too. You can’t leave me hanging like this!”
What the hell, right? Megumi started moving his feet, still super stiffly and anything but graceful, but he did it. He looked at you, following your movements and it didn’t take him long to get the hang of it… well, somewhat at least. He still looked really awkward and helpless, so you reached both your hands out for him again and he grabbed them without hesitation, just like before. You started spinning both of you in circles, giggling at the way his face lit up slightly. He joined your laughter, looking at you with the most adoring smile in the world. It felt… so easy. Everything with you felt so easy.
So now it was just the both of you, spinning around in fast circles, laughing at the night sky filled with stars while in the distance the sound of fireworks slowly died down. The music playing softly in the background, but you didn’t even care that the rhythm of the song didn’t match with your movements at all. Nothing mattered in that moment. Just the two of you. Together. Forever.
“Ah, I was wondering when you’d show up.” Gojo scratched the back of his neck, smiling apologetically. “Maybe I was a bit too rough, when I knocked you out. Sorry about that.”
Megumi stared at him sitting in the front row of lined up chairs. The room was only dimly lit by the candles at the other end. The soft light they cast illuminated a picture of you in a black frame. It was the same one he had saved as his phone background. Megumi gulped, feet moving on their own as he approached Gojo, though, he felt his knees wobble unsteadily. The air became thicker and thicker with every other step he took. It felt excruciatingly hard to breathe. It was suffocating.
Megumi sat down on a chair next to Gojo, forcing himself to tear his eyes off the framed picture in front of him. If he didn’t he was afraid he might break down again. So he shifted his attention to the man in the chair next to him. He was already looking at him, his eyes hidden behind his sunglasses, as usual. There was a slight frown in his features, though, and his mouth was pressed into a thin line, a stark contrast to his normally giddy self. So Gojo could be serious, huh? Who would’ve thought? Bet you would’ve loved to see him like that…
“Megumi,” Gojo broke the silence first, his tone soft, but there was a certain sternness behind it that Megumi didn’t know he had until now. It left no room for interpretation. This was going to be a serious talk and Fushiguro didn’t know if he was ready for that yet. “I know that losing someone you care about is not easy and I’m not trying to pretend that I know exactly what you’re going through right now, but I’m telling you as your sensei and as a friend… you have to move on. And that means you have to stop looking for ways to bring her back.”
Megumi opened his mouth to tell him off, but Gojo just held a finger up to show him he wasn’t done yet. The crease between Megumi’s brows deepened, but he kept his mouth shut regardless. “The world works under a few distinct principles. Rules that cannot be broken, if you will. Like we know that after the sun sets, dawn will come. With darkness, there is light and no matter how harsh a winter might be, spring will always come next. And the pinnacle of those rules will always be that with life there comes death. We don’t get to choose when this’ll be or how it’ll happen, but from the moment we’re born we know without a doubt that we’ll have to leave this place at some point. Death is certain. It’s but one part of life and disrupting that cycle, breaking one of the unbreakable rules, would cause the whole system to fall apart. It would level the ground for mayhem and destruction, nothing would make sense anymore. The world would crumble. As sorcerers you know that we protect the ones who cannot protect themselves, but we also maintain balance and Megumi… while I do understand your desire to see her again, I have to warn you… even if there is a chance, I won’t let you do it at the expense of everyone else’s life.”
Silence fell between them again. Megumi had a hard time believing that these words really just came out of Gojo’s mouth. Deep down, he knew he was right. He knew it was a futile plan to bring you back. It was selfish and irresponsible, but he was so… desperate. So desperate to hear your voice again, so desperate to listen to you laugh or complain, so desperate to feel your delicate and warm touch on his cold skin. He was so desperate for these things; he couldn’t think straight. His mind felt foreign to him without you there. He didn’t know who he was, who he would be without you by his side. He didn’t know if he wanted to be in this world anymore with his source of warmth and comfort gone. They said, time healed all wounds but as of now that seemed impossible. Just a thing people told themselves to keep moving forward. A lie that was supposed to protect oneself from the cruel and harsh truth that the world didn’t stop spinning, that time passed by and that dawn always came… no matter what. The world moved forward regardless if you were here or not and it felt like a cruel joke to him. Nothing seemed the same. He didn’t recognize anything, looking at the world with different eyes. How could there be a world without you in it? Why was everyone moving forward while he was left behind? And how could they? How could they move on? Why didn’t the world stop spinning? It should. Because nothing felt right. Nothing was the same. And yet… that only held true for him.
Megumi wiped away his silent tears with the sleeve of his shirt. “But I didn’t even get to say goodbye,” he croaked out. It was the first thing that came to his mind. He replayed the morning with you over and over again and he couldn’t remember if he said goodbye to you when you left that fateful day. Did he? Did he not? In any case, he would’ve never thought how final of a farewell it would’ve been in the end. “I don’t even remember the last thing I said to her,” he sobbed.
He felt beyond guilty for not being able to recall it clearly. Did he say ‘I love you’? Did you say it back? He wanted to believe he did, but he just wasn’t sure and it drove him insane.
“She knew that you loved her very much, Megumi. I’m sure she knew until the very end.” Gojo patted his shoulder a few times, before he got up. “Take all the time you need.” He left the room, closing the door behind him, but not before he turned around one last time, looking at Megumi with worried eyes. “But remember, Megumi… You have to move on eventually, no matter how hard it is. For her sake and your own… Just know that you have people in your life that you can rely on any time, okay?”
Megumi nodded and Gojo let the door fall shut behind him. The silence that ensued was almost deafening. Finally, Megumi let his tears fall freely, sobbing like a child and sucking in air after shallow breaths.
Everything hurt with you gone. How could he ever move on? How could he ever love again? Megumi was scared he might break in half. How much pain could someone even bear? Though, deep down he knew that he didn’t have a choice… He had to try. And he would try his hardest to keep moving forward, holding on to that tiny glimpse of hope that one day he’d see you again. And when he did, he swore to himself to never stop telling you how much he loved you. Always and forever.
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stickynotestoletters · 4 years ago
Note
may i ask for some poly relationship w larry & sal x male reader hcs?
Ah! Of course! :) Sorry I've been taking so long school is getting to me cause of finals;-;
Warnings: Noncannon compliant (their parents aren't together, no one dies, etc), NSFW (implied teen NSFW otherwise they're out of highschool), no weird cult stuff but they still ghost hunt, more modernish (?) phones and stuff
Sal x Male Reader x Larry hcs
highschool
I think that Sal and Larry would have gotten together before you got there
Like, I say gotten together but the way they started it was literally best friends that were super hornknee and decided to have sex together
They started then developing romantic feelings for each other though
And although the sex dynamic wasn't perfect (refer to my Sal x reader NSFW fic) it was good and they loved each other
It became an on and off thing until they actually worked it out
they talked about it and decided that it was better that they stay friends until they can sort out their own sexual desires and endeavors
Sal didn't even know he could do both as a switch and verse so he wanted to just re-examine his sexual self
And Larry was okay with that
So they decided to date but just without sex for a while
Then you moved to Nockfell their sophomore year
and god were you cool
Sal was the first one to see you in the hallway
It wasn't love at first sight really
He thought you were cool and he wanted to talk to you
Then that same day he told Larry about you during lunch
"I want to talk to him I just don't know how to approach him"
"Oh, well who is it?"
Ngl Larry was kinda jealous about how flustered Sal was getting at the prospect of a new friend but then Sal pointed at you and Larry was like "Oh, okay, I get it."
So Larry just approaches you
It was kinda to tease Sal about how shy he was being
Also kinda because you looked rad as fuck
So Larry approaches you sitting at a table alone
You were actually quite chill
You were happy since no one was approaching you
You guys hit it off and ended up becoming really good friends!
So for the duration of your sophomore year and the summer of your junior year, you guys were really good pals and hung out a lot
Then Larry started developing feelings first
And he was super confused since he knew he still liked Sal, no doubt about it
So he was just super confused and conflicted because he didn’t want to break up with Sal
So during, about the first half, of all of your junior year he kept this to himself and tried to keep himself from feeling for you
Sal on the other hand already accepted his feelings, he realized it later than Larry
And he read yp on what being polygamous meant
So although there was a lot of confusion at first he figured it's no different from people in love triangles
He realizes it a couple weeks after Larry and decides to bring this up to Larry during winter break
The conversation pretty much just went like Sal explaining polyamory to Larry for an hour
They end up deciding to just wait a bit and try to flirt with you individually
you know,
because they don't remember that you don't know they're attracted to you at this point
:)
So basically you think that they're both trying to cheat on each other for the week they're flirting with you
At the end of that week, you tell them to meet you together
And they don't know any better than to meet you
And then you come to them, don't let them explain, and cry because you don't want two of your best friends to cheat on each other like this even though you like them
And then they realize why you're saying this
So although this was not the time they expected to confess to you they told you what they were trying to do
So you just sat there
With these two idiots
and told them "No guys, cause I was literally having a breakdown about losing my two best friends."
And they confess to you
and everything is emotional and raw and you accept
Your guys' dynamic doesn't change because you’re dating now
The only difference is you guys make out together and show lots more pda
although you always bring up what they did when they were trying to give you hints
"We just really wanted to flirt with you okay??? Is it such a crime to want your crush to fall for you???"
"When you guys don't explain you're looking to expand your relationship, yes. Yes, it is Larry."
"He's kind of right babe-"
"SAL-"
Y'all spend a lot of time communicating with each other on stuff like that now
Your senior year goes without any bumps between all of you and you then graduate
College Dynamic
so you and the gang (except Ash, she moves to the city of course) goes and makes a college house
once you all move in together there it's a new routine
You all agreed and talked about the move together and what it would entail
And then you all finally realized how different it was from a monogamous relationship it was
But you all had your learning curves within the relationship
You find out more about their dynamic as a couple
For example, Larry and Sal never liked to fall asleep without you anymore
They had trouble sleeping without you beforehand and the first time you all slept in the same bed together it was just... so... peaceful
They'll spoon and cuddle without you individually (Sal is always the big spoon with Larry)
but they just love falling asleep next to you
They also refuse to do homework without you there
Even if it's just the simplest this they're just gonna need to have you in the room to finish it
Sal likes to make songs about you guys
He records them and edits some but he never lets you two listen to them
"It's just embarrassing if you two were to listen to it. It's like confessing my love for you guys all over again except I can't hide behind the mask."
So until he decides to release his songs online or plays those at gigs he's never going to let you listen to them
Larry likes to paint you guys
His paintings of you before the "disaster confession" were okay, it just looked like he was making a painting of a friend, except for the occasional rose
But now he paints you and draws you two whenever he can
He finds it funny how flustered you and Sal get whenever he makes suggestive paintings or sketches of you two
One time he painted a whole sex portrait of you and Sal together (A 12 by 28 specifically) hung it upright in front of the door to your rooms and didn't tell anyone
So after you and Sal got home that day you were welcomed with Larry lounging on your bed with the giant picture of you fucking Sal next to him
It was definitely beautiful though, even if it's hard to call your nudes beautiful
"Larry Johnson, this painting, as always, masterful. Beautiful craftsmanship but please-" "-we mean this in the most loving way possible Larry-" "-STOP PAINTING OUR NUDES BABE"
He put it away to be hung up in your apartment for when you all move out
Non-College Life
Once you all finish college you guys move into an apartment outside of Nockfell
The minute after you and Sal leave to get food Larry puts up all his private paintings of you guys
It's funny to him
I imagine you guys moving to a really populated city
Somewhere where it's a good place for people wanting to have creative jobs but still close to Nockfell
Maybe not back to New Jersey but probably not as far as New York or LA
you guys do all the cute stuff you never got to in Nockfell together
It's not like the majority of Nockfell was homophobic, mostly just the people who went to the church
But a lot more of them didn't think that polyamory was possible
So now it's easier
It's not like you never experience any polyphobia anymore but it's easier because you're in a more open-minded place
Sal's favorite thing is to go to concerts now
And pride
He also likes coffee house dates too
Larry gets hit on a lot though whenever you guys go out anywhere though
He finds it funny how jealous you both get
Sometimes if he wants Sal to get really mad he'll play along
But most of the time he shuts it down before it begins
Sal gets hit on a lot at concerts the most though
He gets kind of awkward about it, he's not going to edge them on but he gets uncomfortable enough to just not know how to shut them down
Usually, you and Larry will just appear behind him and whisk him away
Larry likes to use it as teasing leverage for a good rough one that night but you usually make sure he's okay with it before Larry does anything
You get hit on the most casually
Here and there but there aren't really specific places
It just sort of happens
You mostly shut them down alone
But occasionally you'll have to go to Sal and Larry if they're persistent
And they'll be mean too
One of the first times you saw Sal and Larry ever legitimately get that mean was when you got hit on in a club and they both just pulled you behind them and absolutely ripped the person a new one
You guys really like to stay at home if you guys have dates though that way everyone feels included
But when you all do go around together it's always specifically for three people you never tell anyone it's a date for dinner reservations, you always make sure you go on rides everyone wants to go on at amusement parks, and hey if worse comes to worst smoking is a group activity (if you have asthma or any other breathing condition Larry makes you edibles if you really wanna do edibles with them)
Starting jobs there are tough and all but you make it off your feet
Sal ends up booking a lot of gigs and Larry's commission request skyrocket when he moves to the city and makes a blog about his art
You all get an apartment with affordable rent and one that allows Gizmo
I hc that Gizmo is an esp but I don't know if that's real
So regardless you'll still be able to have room for him
Sal proposes to both of you
You guys talked about marriage and decided that it would be easier legally to just not get married through a court
So you guys have a friends wedding and Gizmo is the ring bearer
You guys don't get a fancy venue or anything
You guys all just have a city wedding
NSFW
So, the first time you all decide to hook up it's mostly just very communicative rules beforehand
Sal is more comfortable with being fucked than fucking someone else at most times but "It's not like I never want to stick my dick in you two" as he puts it
He also likes background music on most of the time
It's kinda weird if there isn't just a little bit of music
It isn't really bothersome, you guys keep it below 20 at most times
Sal's also super submissive
He liked it rough, make him cry out for you two
A bit of a pillow prince
Especially enjoys being tied up by you two
gags and blindfolds are on the table
Although whenever he does feel up to fucking you and Larry he'll usually end up having you two ride him because he gets to be such a mess with you two unless he's jealous or upset
Usually, when he's upset he's gonna lift you two up and fuck you against the headboard or wherever you two are if he's impatient enough
One time you were chilling with Larry in your bedroom and he was painting over his easel
Sal burst through the door where it slammed back on itself and closed itself
He then tracks his eyes on you
immediately asks you "Can I please fuck you right now"
and as soon as your safe word and consent comes out of your mouth he's holding you down on the bed and fucking into you so hard you can barely breath
Larry doesn't mind it and just continues painting with you moaning and being so pathetic in the background of his music
He kinda finds it funny because before you all got together and he and Larry would angry fuck it never worked out
Sal was just being a brat most of the time because Larry still wouldn't let him fuck him submissively
Speaking of which, Larry's more comfortable with being dominant, he'll bottom but only if he can still be dominant otherwise forget it
Larry's just a rough fucker anyway
He really likes pushing and holding you two up against walls when he fucks you guys
He likes showing off the muscles he got helping his mom with handy work and stuff like that
The first time he did this was to Sal when you were studying in your guy's room
You said you didn't really wanna participate today so they fucked like they would without you
And so they're talking back and forth, teasing each other
and Larry corners him
And just
lifts him up
It looked like he was just lifting a bag of sugar up
Sal seemed weightless as Larry just rocks into him
It was one of the hottest things you'd seen at the time so you joined them
You do that a couple more times but then it just becomes normal and you decide you need to start finishing all those assignments
Larry does that to you one on one as well without Sal but it happens to Sal a lot more spontaneously
Larry though is kinkier than Sal in some respects
He'll try anything at least once "Lisa didn't raise no bitch-"
He's really into breeding and long fucking sessions though
Like, lowkey he has omegaverse fantasies
Not because of the weird stuff just because a lot of the time..... they have breeding written in
He'll never admit to reading any of it but you know he has at least once
Super into dirty talk
And he's really good at it
He also had a praise kink and a degradation kin
He likes degrading you and you telling him thank you and how good he's treating a filthy little brat like you
"What're my filthy little brats good for other than sucking my dick so well. Taking me so well like the dirty little whores you are?"
"Yes sir-" "-we're made for your big cock-" "-thank you for fucking us like this-"
He especially likes breeding you and having Sal suck you off while he does it, he finds your crying cute
And an added bonus is rewarding Sal after for it
You guys talk about long-term consent and all that and decide that it's a good idea, you all trust and love each other so there isn't a problem
lol this kinda went to shit at the end but I still like it enough! Thanks for the Sally Face request I really like this game and the dynamic between a poly reader hc :)
-Laika
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boldlyvoid · 3 years ago
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New Romantics | Part Three
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Summary: She needs help studying for her Case Exercises at the Academy, He needs a date for the annual Banquet... they just so happen to be neighbours who aren't afraid to lend a helping hand, or in this case, a helping kiss.
Categories: Fake dating, neighbours, strangers to lovers, mutual pining, Angst with a happy ending, Smut *as selected by my poll on what you wanted to read*
Warnings: Season 9 Spencer (no Maeve arc), Angst, kissing, drinking, police training mentions, case details, canon typical violence, self-doubt, autistic!spencer, age gaps (24/33), FWB relationships, period mentions, anxiety attacks, crying, misunderstandings,
Word Count: 4.7K
a/n: this chapter covers the whole week from Monday to Friday, thank you @awrfhi for making the gif I used here <3
Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five
Monday morning she’s in his arms still, and then again on Tuesday; he basically lives with her when he’s not on a case. They make dinner together at night and they drive in together every morning, and they have had sex all over her apartment… and he loves her but he was tired when he said it and in a post-orgasm haze and he’s her best friend.
But he loved her— just not the way she loved him. She was sure of it.
Tuesday morning at 10:53 am, she cracks her fake case. They’re apprehending the unsub by Noon and then she has the rest of the week off. So she heads to the main Quantico building, she gets a visitor's pass and she takes the elevator all the way up to the BAU.
She walks through the bullpen doors and Spencer is sitting at his little desk with his head buried in a book. Penelope sees her first, wrapping her up in a hug that gets everyone’s attention as she rocks her back and forth while telling her how much she likes her.
“You are so pretty, and nice and cute, and your hair smells so good?”
“Thank you, it’s Spencer's shampoo,” she laughs as she holds her back, “I just wanted to come and see him really quick?”
He’s standing beside her and she doesn’t even know until Penelope releases her from her grasp. He wraps her up next, “why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”
She kisses him right on the mouth, holding his face in her hands she has missed him too much to wait till they are alone again, “I caught the unsub.”
“No way?”
She nods feverishly, “yeah remember I found that stray hair on the crime scene? Everyone was fighting over why there wasn’t a sexual aspect and I was trying to convince them she was a women unsub when the hair came back matching our victims best friend, who also knew victim number 1.”
He’s so happy, his smile is the biggest any of his teammates have ever seen, he lifts her and twirls her around and no one can believe the sight. Spencer Reid the uptight, overly smart, always following proper procedure, Doctor at the FBI; was spinning his girlfriend around as he kissed her cheek.
“You are a genius,” he compliments her as he sets her back down and places another kiss on her lips.
“I know,” she laughs, “I beat your score by one day.”
“I hate you,” he kisses her again and by now they don’t realize they have an audience. It’s incredibly convincing to everyone except each other.
“No, you love me,” she whispers, kissing him again before they hear someone clear their throat.
“Do you want to help with ours?” Derek asks, jumping into the moment and reminding them that they’re in public. “We’re just doing non-urgent consults today.”
“Am I allowed?” She lights up.
Derek nods, “I don’t see why not, as long as you just tell your ideas to us and don’t file anything then I think it’s legal?”
So she helps and it’s the most exhilarating thing since having sex with Spencer. She’s in her element, looking at small details and making connections that even leave Spencer humming and ha-ing. She has a younger insight than the rest of the team, she’s exactly why they hired Spencer in the first place and now she was shining brighter than him.
But he loved it.
Every time she made a connection or she had a suggestion that helped one of them on their own train of thought, Spencer would smile at her like she hung the stars in the night sky. He was proud of her in a way she hasn’t seen in many people before, filling her heart with warmth and hope that maybe he can love her for real one day.
She was possibly the love of his life and the more he saw her work and the more he knew her mind; the more he fell. She walked around his office and talked to his friends as if she was always meant to be there, and a part of him really wanted her to be.
He snuck away to go talk to Hotch, closing his office door as he sat down, “what’s wrong?”
“Y/N isn’t really my girlfriend,” he whispers. “She’s pretending so I could get everyone to stop bothering me about dating, and I understand it looks like she’s using me to get close to the team but I really do think she would be an excellent asset to the unit even if she was just in the office—“
“Reid,” Hotch cuts him off and a smile builds. “I already sent her an offer to take Anderson's job while he’s out on paternity leave.”
“Oh,” he smiles to himself. “Pretend I never said anything.”
“It stays in these 4 walls, don’t worry,” Hotch smiles back, “but you should tell her.”
“Tell her what?”
“That you’re in love with her.”
“I’m not,” he lies, “really, I do love her but I’m not in love with her, there is a difference.”
“I know,” Hotch reminds him. “Did you know that I only joined the school musical to get close to Haley? I did whatever I could to get her to fall in love with me and didn’t even realize it when she did because I was so worried she didn’t.”
“Oh.”
Hotch nods with another smile, “you don’t have to tell her until you’re ready, obviously, but you should tell her before it’s too late.”
“I will,” he whispers. “Thanks, Aaron.”
“Why don’t you guys head out early?” He offers, “we could all use a day off with the people we love.”
When he walks back down from Aaron's office, Y/N is with Emily and JJ discussing how she caught her fake unsub at school that morning. She doesn’t brag, she loves to mention her classmates by name and verbatim explains how they helped her. She is a team player, a genius, beautiful, kind… she really is the love of his life.
“Hey,” he places his hand on her lower back as he slides into the conversation. “Hotch said we can all leave early if we wanted?”
“Sure,” she smiles, “actually, did you want to come with me to buy a dress for your thing?”
“That would be fun,” he agrees, wrapping his other arm around her so he can rest his chin on her shoulder and hold her. “Remember I’m buying it so don’t stress about the price.”
“You’re too nice to me,” she replies.
“I just love you,” his voice is as low as he can make it but everyone still hears.
She holds him back tighter, in a silent ‘I love you, too’ and they hear JJ and Emily swoon.
They’re quick to get their things and head out, she hands Spencer her keys and lets him drive to the mall so she can relax, she’s done a lot today.
She’s so quiet on the drive, she holds his hand like she always does and she just looks out the window, she’s peaceful and content with the nothingness of spending alone time with Spencer. They were always just quiet together, sometimes they laughed till they cried and sometimes he could make her scream but most of the time they were quiet.
“Have you checked your email?”
She smiles as she turns to him and her grip on his hand tightened, “what did you do?”
“I didn’t do anything, I just told hotch the truth so that he could offer you a job, but he already had before I went in there but he’s a good secret keeper, believe me.”
“Oh,” her smile disappears. “So he knows we’re not really dating?”
He nods, “Is that okay?”
“Yeah, I guess we’re going to have to find a convincing way to break up for them and still be able to hang out all the time,” she worries aloud. “Because I don’t want to stop this any time soon, I hope you know that. I really like spending time with you.”
“I feel the same way,” he agrees. “I promise, we can just tell them we work better as friends and they might believe us?”
“I don’t think they will,” she frowns again. “JJ told me not to break your heart today, but I feel like if we break up I’m going to break all of theirs.”
“We could have a fake ugly breakup, and not talk to each other publicly for a bit and then be friends again?” He suggests, “Penelope and Kevin did that.”
She nods, still frowning. She interlocks their fingers this time and she holds his hand instead of just anxiously fiddling with his fingers. She really doesn’t want to let go, and he’s almost convinced she feels the same way.
The banquet is on Saturday, she has one last week of school before her graduation and then they’re done. He thinks about asking her, about what would be the best time to tell her he was in love with her and ask her to be his real girlfriend.
Maybe he’ll do it after the banquet? Maybe he’ll do it after her graduation? He just really wants to do it before she meets his mom. He wants his mom to meet her as the love of his life and his best friend.
He hated many things, but as he kept glancing at her as he drove he realized he hated one thing most of all. He hated that he couldn’t love her as much as she deserved, at least not yet. He wanted to shower her in love, he wanted to protect her and care for her, he wanted to show her off and make love to her and never leave her side.
It hurts, his heart physically aches as he thinks about that. If he had to feel like this to know his love was real, then the pain was worth it. She was always worth it, and he would hurt as long as possible, forever even, if it meant he could be around her just as long.
He held her hand tighter in the silence which made her turn to him, he had no idea he had been crying until she leans over and wipes his cheeks, “I love you, you know that?”
“I love you too,” he smiles but he can’t keep the conversation there, he’s feeling trapped and so he changes the topic. “What colour dress were you thinking?”
The quick-change makes her laugh, “probably black.”
“Are you sure?”
She nods, “I don’t need to stand out beside you any more than I already do.”
“What does that mean?”
She bits her lip, “some of the people in my class are saying that I’m only doing so well because you’re helping me cheat and that I’m just fucking you to get a job… just like I thought they would.”
“At the end of the day, we have a friendship they will never understand, we have great sex because we want to, you’re smarter than me, and the BAU wants you… so who is the real winner?” He’s always going to be her number one cheerleader.
“You’re right,” she smiles again finally, “as always.”
He convinces her to get a red dress.
She hasn’t had a pretty dress like this one since her prom and that was 6 years ago. She hasn’t been to a party or mingled with people in just as long, she didn’t realize how lonely she had been while chasing her dreams until Spencer came along.
He was one of the dreams. She saw him talk once, years ago on a school trip, and she fell in love with him a little, even back then. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to be him or be with him back then, doing everything in her power to get into the criminal psych degree at her local college, she just wanted to be like him.
Now she’s liked by him.
Every night he goes to his home across the hall and he does his own nightly routine before coming back to her apartment for the night. She’s too emotional to sleep with him today, she knows that if she has sex with him she’s going to say something stupid or cry after because being this close to him without being honest with him is killing her.
Something in him has changed too, he’s less scared to initiate contact, he doesn’t jump anymore when she hugs him or when she smacks his bum as she passes him. Now he’s wrapping his arms around her while she cooks dinner, and he kisses her cheek randomly when they’re in public.
He tells her that he loves her.
She’s confused and she has no one to talk to about it.
She lays back against her pillows and closes her eyes, she knows she’s going to cry soon, and she doesn’t know what to do because she doesn’t want to cry in front of him and he would be upset if she told him to not come back tonight.
The stress of the situation just makes her cry more as she stresses herself into another anxiety attack, much like the first night she talked to him. She just lets it happen, the anxiety in her stomach builds and the tears slip past her eyes and suddenly she’s sobbing into her pillow hard enough that she doesn’t hear him come back.
She jumps at the feeling of his hand on her back as he sits on the edge of the bed, “what’s wrong?”
She just sits up and hugs him, and he hugs her back and they stay there like that for a while. When she calms down, she pulls back from him and wipes her eyes, “my period is coming.” She’s not really lying, and he believes her.
“Does it normally make you this emotional?”
He’s never really experienced her mood swings, he has no idea what he’s in for, she nods. “Yeah, and I have really bad anxiety which just gets worse around this time.”
“And you’re not on anything?”
She shakes her head, “I’m waiting to get onto the good healthcare when I get a job with the bureau, I can’t afford to work and go to school, I’m glad I had enough scholarship money left to rent this place long enough to go to the academy.”
“Oh.”
She just nods, “I’ve never had much money like my parents have been saving for 2 years to buy plane tickets to Virginia so that they can see me graduate. They started saving before I even got in. I went to community college on a scholarship and I get a lot of money from applying for bursaries.”
“Are you going to take the CARD job or the BAU offer?”
She shrugs, “I’m not sure yet, but probably CARD.”
“Why?”
“I can’t work with you,” she whispers. “It makes me feel like I don’t deserve to be there like I’m using you and that all my work isn’t that great. I’m just Doctor Spencer Reids girlfriend.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way, imposter syndrome is a leading factor in depression among child prodigies, once you reach a certain age and you stop receiving awards for your work, it’s hard to believe that you’re still doing a good job.”
She knows he gets it, he has probably said the same fact to himself to calm down before. “Thank you.”
“Do you want me to stay?”
She nods, pulling back the covers and moving over so he can snuggle in beside her. She holds him, resting her head on his chest and taking a deep inhale of his cologne, this was the love of her life and if this was as close as she was ever going to be to him, she was going to take it.
He kisses the top of her head and holds her in his arms at just the right pressure to calm her down. She feels so comfortable with him but she still feels like shit, she doesn’t stop crying, and he just holds her through it.
“Do you want to tell me what’s really wrong?” He whispers after a while, he sounds worried.
“No,” she whispers. “I can’t.”
“Is it about me?”
“Yeah,” she cries again, “and I don’t have any other friends to talk to about us and now you’ve told hotch and I have no one to talk to about how this is kinda stressing me out.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” his voice is still scared and she knows he’s going to panic regardless and just send them around in a circle of constant anxiety. But his tone is more apologetic than one fuck up.
“Who else did you tell?” She sits up, “I thought this was just between us?”
“I needed advice, the same reason you are reacting right now, you’re stressing me out,” Spencer finally talks back with passion and she knows they’re about to fight for no reason.
“I never said you were stressing me out. I said our situation was, but I think I need to sleep alone now, Spencer” she’s confident and stern even though she’s crying.
“We can’t go to bed mad at each other. You even said the mornings are the worst, we can’t hate each other for no reason tomorrow,” he starts to cry, not knowing where he went wrong and she can see it on his face.
“I just don’t have what you have, and I’ve always been trying to copy you…”
“What?”
She sighs and wipes her tears, “I have had a big fat, fan-girly, crush on you since I was 18, I came here with my class to watch you do a talk on philias and phobias and then I knew I wanted to get into the academy and I wanted to beat your record and join the BAU, and I just thought; one day I’m going to be friends with this guy and catch bad guys with him and now I am and I’m so alone.”
“You have me?”
“I know,” she tries to smile, “but I only have you and I can tell you almost everything. Like my biggest stressor right now is that if just looking at fake crime scenes for 3 weeks has made me this anxious; what if I’m not cut out for this? What if I get to a real crime scene and I pass out or—“
“That’s only human,” he presses his lips together, awkwardly, and very Spencerly. “If you didn’t feel like this job makes you hate the world and untrusting of everyone around you; then I would think you’re crazy.”
“How do you do it?”
“I open up and let people in, but I typically wait till I’m at my lowest; crying in my friend's arms because I don’t know what to do anymore,” he smiles again, wider and toothy as she smiles back.
“Thank you,” she can’t help but tilt her head and smile as her heart settles and her brain calms down a bit, “I love you.”
“Can I kiss you or is that too much right now?”
She gets in closer to him, laying back down on the pillow and looking at him. They’re closer enough to kiss, and she just takes a moment to look at him, resting her hand on his cheek as he wraps around her waist and pulls her in closer.
“We’re okay?” He asks with his lips right against her, his breath is hot and he smells like toothpaste.
“We’re okay, but no more talking tonight, okay?” She whispers.
He nods, leaning in and kissing her finally. She knows she shouldn’t be kissing him, she knows that she should be mad at herself, but she also knew that even just pretending that he loved her back was good enough.
He gets called away to a case on Wednesday morning, he’s too busy to really call her and he doesn’t text back. He feels bad about it but he knows she wanted space to think anyway, what he didn’t expect was for her to reach out to Penelope.
She’s in the office with her on Friday, tired of Spencer ignoring her so she went to the one place he couldn’t avoid her; Penelope’s office.
“How can I help you today, my fine furry friends?” Y/N answers the phone with a smirk, copying Penelope’s line perfectly, they can hear them high five through the line.
“Y/N?” Spencer is the first to catch it, “what are you doing there?”
“I came to meet Anderson and see if I’d like to take his job or not,” she teases, pretending she wasn’t there just to bother him.
Hotch cuts in, asking the question he needed to ask before hanging up, “not sure what’s going on at home but we’re too close to cracking this case for schoolyard games.”
“Yes sir,” he nods and looks away, retreating to the other side of the room to stare at the map and pretend to find connections.
“Crack this and you can go home to her,” Derek whispers with a smile, thinking he’s helping the situation.
“That’s not where I want to be right now.”
“Woah,” Derek catches it, “what happened?”
“Nothing,” he’s quick to get him to stop it but he really wants advice, “she’s stressed out and she took it out on me and I wasn’t very nice back.”
“You said sorry and you pretended you were over it, didn’t you?”
He turns away from Derek with a nod, he wants to come out with it and get it over with and he’s so mad and embarrassed he just starts to cry a little, “I don’t want to lose her.”
“How could you?”
“You have no idea,” he rolls his eyes lightly and scoffs, confusing Derek.
“And I won't unless you want to talk to someone about what’s really bothering you, but you’ve been happier since you met her and I like seeing you happy, and Savannah likes double dates,” he scolds him with a smile, patting his shoulder lightly. “now let's crack this and maybe on the plane you will tell me what’s up?”
“Sure,” he says, but he doesn’t want to.
However, Derek Morgan is good at a lot of things, and one of those things is getting Spencer to calm down enough to tell him anything. Everyone is asleep on the plane, it’s just the two of them at the back together when Spencer finally feels confident enough to say it.
“I lied to you, a long time ago… and it’s just the first one.”
Derek doesn’t look angry, “okay, explain your thought process. I need to know how this pretty brain of yours works.”
He smiles a bit, “I slept with Elle the night before she shot that rapist in Ohio.”
“You did not?” Derek's voice gets a little too loud and they stop to make sure no one woke up.
“I did, but you still always made jokes about finally getting me some lovin’ and it bothered me for a while and I never told you, instead I offered to help my neighbour with her homework if she pretended to date me,” his voice lowers as the words continue and he only stares at the table between them.
“Spencer, I’m sorry,” Derek apologizes first. “I didn’t know I was upsetting you, is there anything else I do that upsets you?”
He shakes his head in a silent no, still not looking at him, he can't.
“What happened between you and Y/N?” He jumps to the main issue, fine with what happened because he feels bad for causing the issue in the first place.
“We started sleeping together.”
Derek sighs, “you have such a big brain, you can remember everything she’s ever said to you and yet you can’t see that she’s in love with you.”
“She’s good at pretending,” he pushes it away.
“No she’s not, because she’s pretending she doesn’t love you right now; the same way you are and you’re both fucking it up for each other,” Derek gives it to him straight. “You have always been loveable, but you have a very hard time accepting it, Spencer.”
“Yeah,” he starts to cry a little more.
“Go home and talk to her and tell her the truth,” it’s the best advice he can give and Spencer knows it. “What’s the worst that can go wrong?”
“She does love me back but in a few years, she realizes I’m too much and she leaves me,” his voice is the saddest Derek has ever heard it.
He gets up from his seat and hugs Spencer, sliding into the seat beside him and wrapping his arms around him, “you have never been too much. You just surround yourself with people who aren’t good enough to love you for who you are.”
“She’s better than me.”
“Which is exactly what I mean, she’s not going to leave you, believe me, once you love Spencer Reid for who he really is, it’s hard to stop,” he speaks from experience, thinking of what could have been between them if either of them had tried harder in the past.
“She’s the love of my life,” he confirms, “I’m never going to love anyone else the way I love her.”
They get the word that they’re going to be landing soon, Spencer wipes his tears and buckles in for the descent, avoiding everyone’s stares and questions on the ride back to headquarters. He’s nervous to see her, he knows his face is puffy and she’ll be there waiting for him with Penelope, but he has to do it.
“Would you wait here, I need to tell her now and she might not give me a ride home if it doesn’t go well,” he asks Derek before heading to Penelope, “she was already mad at me for telling Hotch the truth.”
“Okay, sure,” Derek smiles, reaching out a hand for Spencer, “come to me when you need me next time, okay?”
“Okay,” he agrees with a small smile, heading out to find his fake girlfriend.
She’s not with Penelope, no she’s in the filing room with Anderson and the other temps all talking and laughing, and it sounds far too interesting to interrupt. He waits outside the door and smiles at her laughter until he hears it.
“So be honest,” Agent Camden asks, “are you sleeping with Reid for this job?”
“If I was sleeping my way to the top, don’t you think I would have picked Morgan? Or Prentiss even?” She laughs and it’s like someone stabs a knife through his heart.
He turns around and heads back to Derek, “take me home.”
“Okay,” he doesn’t pry, he just grabs his coat and keys and follows Spencer to the garage.
He’s really ignoring her.
She finds out from Emily that Spencer left with Derek, and that he looked rather pissed off when he asked for a ride. It breaks her heart a little and she doesn’t know what to do next, she just drives home and finds herself knocking on his door.
“Let me in, please, Spencer!” She begs from behind his door.
He opens it and looks at her with a puffy red face, tear-stained cheeks and swollen lips, he’s been crying for a while. “What?”
“What did I do?”
“You slept with me,” he whispers, “and I told you I wouldn’t react well.”
“Is it my fault you’re crying?” She asks softly and he nods, “do you want to tell me?”
He closes his eyes and shakes his head, “are we still going to the banquet together tomorrow?”
“I really fucked up,” is all he can muster, crying again as he closes the door and goes to cry in his room.
She just opens the door again and follows him inside. Kicking off her shoes she crawls into bed beside him and wraps herself around him, “you don’t have to tell me but I am here for you, always.”
“I love you,” he says it like it’s the problem before he rests his head in the crook of her neck and holds her back for the first time in days.
“I love you, too, Spencer,” she cries along with him. They cry until he’s asleep and she’s just there holding him in her jeans and she’s really uncomfortable but she loves him too much to let go.
“More than you will ever know.”
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