#except 1 lil bonus joke comic

[funkle420]

i cant believe i checked out a spinoff evangelion manga instead of the real thing,,,, i feel so foolish....

[b1uecandlehomestuck]

Speaking of that tier list, I made a tier list, a personal ranking of the Homestuck characters. Nothing definitive or objective. Feel free to comment on it, or send me your own tier lists for me to judge.

I’m gonna put the rest below a “read more” just because, after writing it, I’m realizing it’s insanely long so I’m not gonna dump this monster of a text post without a nice little cut-off point. I encourage you to read more, but you don’t have to.

I’ll start from the bottom and go up.

For starters, I think the bottom tier is pretty much objective and inarguable.

F. This tier is reserved for characters I consider to be failures. Personally, I feel like HIC is just not a very satisfying “main antagonist” for the trolls; I don’t specifically mean that she didn’t fullfil her role well, like other characters in this tier; it’s a good base for alternians to have a tyrannical ruler who was responsible for throwing their society into the fucked up mess it is. However, as for HIC herself, she feels very lacking. She’s greedy and merciless. That’s it. She’s merciless because she’s greedy. That’s about the extent of her depth. The same goes for Meenah, they’re basically the same characters. She had some potential to grow with (Vriska), however, the fact that she simply decides to abandon (Vriska), while it does serve to show how HIC is inherently merciless, damns her to F-tier. I’ll admit that I may have a negative bias to the troll-sprites, but they always felt like an insult to the people who were upset at the deaths of the trolls. The ones that aren’t effectively silent no longer represent their own characters, and just feel like a suppliment to the character they’re fused to; Erisol is a little funny, but is otherwise inneffectual. Fefeta seems like an intentional insult to the people upset by both Nepeta and Feferi’s deaths to just have her permanently mute for no reason. Davepeta never really felt too much like Nepeta, just a continuation of Davesprite’s story. ARquius, again, just felt like AR with some of Equius’ quirks. Corrupt Jane and Corrupt Jade have no personalities and basically took away any character from the two characters who needed character development more than ANY of the humans. They have a few cool moments, but are ultimately fail to be proper characters. I forget Dancestor Eridan’s name. I’m not crazy about the Dancestors, I don’t think many people are, but he’s one of the most noteless. Eridan... I will admit, maybe I shouldn’t put him as low as he is. He’s not really a failure in terms of his literary goal; Eridan is a very good antagonist. He’s an angsty, alternian-equivalent neo-nazi ultra-angsty teen, and he sits in that role absolutely perfectly. On the other hand, as someone who loves Feferi as much as I do, it’s hard not to loathe him. I know, it’s a very biased reason to dislike him, and I mean no disrespect to those who do, but I would be remissed if I didn’t put him at the bottom. He really isn’t as bad as his placement would imply, I just have a personal vendetta. Jake. He’s just Jake. Literally the only reason he exists is to fulfill the need to have Jade’s guardian be one of the Alpha kids. Beyond that, he’s basically just a robot who says old-timey words and we’re told is very attractive. Dancestor Gamzee is down here for the same reason as Dancestor Eridan. Noteless, and related to a character I hate. Biased? Yes. But this isn’t an objective list.

E. This is for characters who annoy me personally, more or less. Except for Tavrosprite. Tavrosprite is here because he’s a troll-sprite; however, he’s consistently funny, and is mostly used very sparingly. Also, Tavros gets more of a major role later on, so maybe it leaves less of a sting. I also really like Tavrisprite. They’re probably the best sprite. They get a really cool theme and are a funny joke character. I didn’t give a shit about Dirk until the Epilogue. It says a lot when the Epilogue manages to make a character more interesting considering the Epilogue is the worst part of the comic. That being said, it takes him from “awkward angsty teen” to “evil omnipotent god-character”, so it’s not really much of an improvement. Most of the time, when Dirk comes up, it sends a signal to my head saying “oh god, here comes a long, drawn out, over-complicated spiel about ultimate selves and bullshit like that”. Sollux had his moments early on; he was a much better character early on, but quickly became a weird, kinda depressing character? I dunno. In hindsight, maybe he should be in E. I think I just dislike him because he’s with Aradia and Feferi and I think they deserve better but that’s a dumb way to think so whatever. Give him like an E+. Jadesprite. She cries a lot. There are some funny moments but ultimately, not crazy about her. She has none of the parts of Jade I liked and didn’t exactly serve to improve Jade in any way. Lord English... too complicated. Why’s he got so many origins? I dunno. Caliborn added much more to him, but I’m gonna separate “Caliborn” and “Lord English” into two characters. On his own, Lord English is just kinda nothing. A big spooky boogeyman. Vriska. That’s right, THE Vriska. My thoughts on Vriska are extremely complicated. There are hints at something more under the surface, but I feel like there was too long of a stint of her being a straight-up Mary Sue who kills everyone and is super cool and is never punished. I’ll talk about this more when we get to (Vriska). Moving on.

D. These are characters who have done nothing for me, or are otherwise just a step below “neutral”. Dirkbot is kinda the only entertaining thing to Dirk as a character. Dirk is basically the “host” to the real star of the show in terms of Dirk’s characterization, Dirkbot. Lemme get some bonus shout-outs to Sawtooth and Squarewave. I really like And It Don’t Stop, a comic Hussie made long ago, which is what they were based on. I feel like if Dirk kept that aesthetic more, I’d like him more as a character. Calliope... An interesting concept, I really like some concepts in relation to her, but as has been discussed, I feel like Hussie and the writers like to frame her as being perfect and they sort of refuse to dig deeper into what could make for a very interesting character. Dualscar looks cool but otherwise doesn’t do much for me. I REALLY like the Ancestors besides HIC, so instead of being plopped down to F like the Dancestors, the “nothing” Ancestors get put in D. Grandpa Harley is just kinda around, much like Jake. Horrus... is kinda interesting. Kinda cute. I like him. And he’s related to a troll I really like, so he gets a boost. Rufio is a joke character, but he’s a decent joke character, so he gets in D. Mindfang and the Summoner are here for the same reason as Dualscar. Mom Lalonde has EXTREMELY limited relevance, but her short time is decent. Now that I’m thinking about it, she doesn’t really deserve a D. Maybe a C-. I’m gonna be really honest, Porrim gets to be in D because she’s pretty. That’s about all the reasoning there is.

C. This is my “neutral” point. Everyone here is the middle ground. (Vriska) is the Vriska we see getting abandoned by Meenah in Act 6. She’s the Vriska who’s grown as a character, and experienced deep resentment for how awful she was, and then faced how horrible she was first-hand. I’m gonna be honest; I love (Vriska). Unfortunately, Hussie, being the horrid subhuman that he is, decides that after putting (Vriska) through the worst, and then getting abandoned by the only flushed interest she’s ever really had, we would never see her again. (Vriska) deserves to be in A, but Hussie cut her down to a C. Aranea is interesting; aside from having an involved and reasonable part of the plot, she’s a very enjoyable character. Lord knows I can relate to somebody with a very special interest who adores to just ramble and ramble and ramble paragraph after paragraph about them, just like what I’m doing at this very moment. Good dog. Best friend. Lil’ Cal is a joke character who becomes a surprisingly pivotal character in what seems like a stupid way at first, but eventually makes genuine sense. An interesting character to think about. If you can even really call him a character? Damara... well, I think she’s pretty. Also her dialogue is funny after you translate it. So she gets a +1 on Porrim. Davesprite is funny. Dave’s funny, so a second Dave is also funny. He’s no all-star, but he’s alright, yeah. The Desciple is cute and a good relation to Nepeta. The Grand Highblood is extremely intimidating. I think he’s a really cool design for an intimidating, horrible warlord. That’s all. John... is interesting. Funny and dopey, but as far as character development goes he really starts to slow down and become... kinda... weird. I’m not really sure how I feel about him, ultimately. So, C. I really liked Jane, but then they turned her into a mindless bad guy with a tiara, and then they turned her into a mindless bad guy because capitalism. I like Rosesprite. I think I like her considerably more than Davesprite, give her a C+. She’s definitely the best of the sprites; she represents Rose well, but also twists her personality in a new and interesting way by making her very peppy and really playing with that silly side of Rose that’s so rare. Kankri... I’ll admit it, I think he’s kinda cute. He’s fussy. Whiny, sure, but I dunno. Meulin is extremely cute, but her actual writing irks me. Not because it’s bad, it’s just... you know. Doc Scratch was a fun antagonist for the time we had him. Certainly a lot more fun than any of the other antagonists (sans one), even if a lot of his writing hinged on being all-knowing. Karkat and Sollux’s ancestors served good story roles so they get C. Obviously we don’t really know anything about their personalities, but they give you some stuff to think about.

Oh god this is way too long, I’m too tired to finish this shit. You can ask me about the rest of you’re curious, g’night.