#everything over this week has just been festering and im getting really tired of it

[jammiesjars]

MDNI

Warnings: Accusation of Infedelity, heavily unedited writing (wrote this in a power outage in my notes app xx), fingering, eating pussy, dirty talk, dumbification if you squint REALLY hard.

One message is all it took for you to spiral.

Outrage was an understatement. A month, a single month, into Price’s deployment you had recieved a message from an unknown number. They insisted of Price having an affair with his so-called ‘receptionist.’ Being his wife, you didnt believe it. You and John had been married for years now. He wasnt that kind of man! (You hoped.)

Weeks passed and wheels start turning. Seeds of doubt had started digging into you. The late nights he had stayed at base before his deployment, only sending as much as a quick text of ‘Be home late. Dont wait up.’ Or the necessary secrecy between what happens at his job or deployment were starting to plant ideas in your head you wouldnt have ever had if not for that message. Youre being worn down, and its killing you. Its not like you could ask him; being thousands of kilometres away without any time to do as much as glance at his phone.

So the emotional resentment grew. You find yourself wondering how he could do this to you, crying in your empty home that housed the both of you not long ago. Before you even come to terms with it, Youve packed your bags and lawyered up, letting your resentment fester for far to long without any outside input.

On the third month of Prices deployment, you drive yourself up to base with one intention; leave the divorce papers on his desk to find when he comes back and to leave without confrontation.

Security on base knows you as ‘Price’s missus’ by now, offering a small wave and a smile as you walk by and into your husbands office. You put the papers on his desk, that frustration and hurt bubbling up all over again. He has your wedding photo framed on his desk and it only hurts more. What did you do to deserve this?

You turn to go, heading back towards his door when you hear muffled laughter and the sounds of gear being unzipped and dumped from down the hallway. Theyre back. You pick up the pace, praying you can slip out before he gets close enough to notice. You reach for the door handle, but the door opens before you can even grasp it.

Shit.

And there he is, your eyes drinking in the sight of the awfully more rugged version of your husband; beard outgrown and messy with tired eyes that light up at the sight of you.

That light dies as soon as sees just how mad you look.

“So youre telling me, one message is all it took to lose all fucking faith?” Price practically growls, fingers rubbing at his temples. Hes sat in his chair with you on the other side of his desk, just as furious. “Everything makes sense! The staying late at base, the short messages and lack of updates when your deployed!” You hiss, frustration bubbling over making anything small seem huge.

Price takes a deep breath, a futile attempt to calm his temper. “The shit I deal with doesnt sleep. Theres reasons i stay back that you will never know, love. The law itself, wont let me tell you. Same goes for messages. Im sorry i dont have the time to let you know im okay when im deployed, god knows i wish I did.” He scowls, his gaze so heated and intense that you almost look away despite your own fury.

“And what about this receptionist huh?”

Your tone has changed, soft and shaky. vunerable.

Price’s expression softens, but he doesnt say a word, simply rounding his desk to pluck you out of your own chair and putting you down in his office chair. He sinks to his knees in front of you, hands rested on your thighs. Blue eyes peer up at you, sickeningly sincere. “Love, I dont interact with her unless necessary. This isnt some romance movie bullshit.” Your heart is working overtime, lips parted as guilt bubbles. “You- you understand where my doubt is coming from, though…right? Everything lined up perfectly, and-“

Price simply tuts. “We’ve talked about that pretty little head of yours overthinking too much, havent we?” You freeze, throat drying. You nod. “Answer me, sweetheart.”

“Yes-“ you croak. “We have.”

Price grunts in approval, his hands now running up and down your thighs.

“Have you been feeling neglected, hm? Is that it? My sweet wife needs some attention?” Price rumbles, his large, calloused hands that have been marked by countless battles now playing with the hem of your skirt.

“You’ve got my attention now, luvie. No need to play these stupid games with me.”

Your mind is already growing hazy; your husbands words making you almost want to forget about this whole incident. A finger hooks onto the waistband of your panties, bringing you back to the moment.

“Stupid games? John i was prepared to divorce you-“ he shushes you, dragging your underwear down your thighs, then your calves and over your shoes before slipping them into his pocket. A cheeky smile graces his face. stupid muttonchops.

“Must’ve left you alone for far too long then, if you were willing to take it this far.”

He slings your legs over his impossibly large shoulders, making you squeak as your pulled forward on the chair.

“Wouldve come home and fucked those stupid thoughts straight out of your head if i had known you were having doubts about my loyalty, sweetheart.”

He presses a messy kiss to your clit, making you gasp. He grumbles something incoherent (“Me? Cheat? Silly girl.”), before licking a long stripe up your neglected cunt, causing your hips to buck. The taste of you after going months without has price groaning into your heat. He eats like a man starved, a mix of desire to prove his loyalty and that he finally gets to taste his wife after being away for so long.

Hes fuming, really. Toward you? No.

Towards whatever stupid bastard sent you that message. He’s glad you didnt notice him slip your phone in his pocket, because he knew you’d be against him hunting the fucker down. You just need a distraction to keep that pretty little head thinking too hard. And he’ll give you just that.

“Oh, my poor sweet wife…” He grunts, before sucking on your clit with a renewed fevor. He pulls off with a lewd pop, two thick fingers replacing his previous ministrations. You’re squirming in his office chair, mind hazy and hips bucking.

“Thinkin’ I was out here cheating on ya’… you know better, love.” He tuts.

His fingers curl so nicely into that spongey spot that makes you see stars. “M sorry-“ you’d slur, “I didnt believe it when I first saw the message I promise-“ you gasp as price presses his thumb against your clit, rubbing in small tight circles.

“Lovie, you stormed in here with divorce papers. Dont tell me you didn’t believe it.”

Your head tilts back as you pant, small gasps slipping past your lips.

“There we go.” Price coaxes, his fingers picking up their pace.

“Wouldnt even cross my mind to look at another woman when my gorgeous girl looks like that as I stuff her cunt full of my fingers.” He coos, watching your face intently as your release crashes down; intense enough to make you writhe and moan.

Price pulls his fingers from you, licking them clean before getting up off his knees. Your throat runs dry, bracing for whats to come even as you grapple your bearings. You’re mentally preparing for Price to be dissapointed, upset with you, maybe even mad.

He analyzes your expression, leaning back against his desk. His eyes scrape over your small form sat in his chair.

“Im not upset, love. That pretty little head of yours had months to overthink that message without a voice of reason.”

Price tilts your chin up.

“Lets just not have to do this again, hm? Then i’ll be mad.”

Its sounds like a threat, but it isnt. Price knows he’ll always be there to talk his beloved wife down from the edge.

[dawnedon]

gonna probably take a break from all of my blogs over the weekend until sunday evening. i dont know what i need to do but i think i might clear out my followers list or something across all my blogs, im not sure yet. there’s a number of people i just dont want to associate w in the rpc/even see on my dash through other people and im just starting to get angry/overly anxious when im on any of my blogs

[girls-scenarios]

Ignorance Isn’t Bliss

Prompt:  Hi, can I request a friends with benefits angsty scenario with Blackpink's Jennie and fem reader. You can add smut if you want. Thank you💙💙💙

Writer: Admin Lee

A/N: I ended up leaving out the smut :( and also made this very sad! There’s some cursing and implied adult content, but other than that it’s just angsty. Jennie might be a little OOC towards the end (and the ending was a little rushed) but it’s just to fit the prompt better. Hope you like it!

It was cold in her room, despite the events that had just transpired. Jennie had gone to shower, leaving you alone in the dark space, lit only by a dim lamp on her nightstand. You felt a little gross after the fact, both from the sweat drying on your body as you sat on the edge of the bed, and from the nagging feeling you had in the pit of your stomach; the one that made you feel like this whole thing was a mistake.

Wrapped deeply in your thoughts, you didn’t hear the door open, and didn’t register Jennie coming into the room wrapped in a towel.

“(Y/N)?” She called to you, but her voice was muffled.

She touched your shoulder gently, effectively snapping you out of the stupor you were in.

“Oh, sorry, I’m just tired.. what time is it?” It was a half-lie and a distracting inquiry, meant to placate and avoid the truth of your unease.

“It’s almost 1 a.m.” She replied, turning from you grab some pajamas from her closet. “Are you going to shower?”

You got up, catching the used towel that Jennie threw your way and wrapping yourself in the slightly damp cloth.

“Yeah, I guess I will.”

-

The shower was warm, physically comforting you as the water washed over your skin. You feebly attempted to scrub the guilt away, rubbing until your skin was red, but to no avail. Everything stayed, stuck to you like glue; the most recent events, as well as the ones of days past. You didn’t want to realize that she was using you, didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that this situation wasn’t something good anymore. Really, you tried to hold out for her. You were friends - are friends. Couldn’t you talk to her? Maybe rethink the whole “benefit” addition to your friendship? You sigh, running your hands through your hair. This was a lot of heavy thinking for what, ten minutes? You should get out of the shower, you think. So you do, and you’re back in Jennie’s room within a couple of minutes.

“Hey,” you greet softly, not wanting to startle the girl, who was now reading in her bed. “Sorry I took so long.”

“It’s alright, don’t worry about it. Feel better?”

You frown, which goes unseen by her.

“Yeah.” You tell her, but it’s a lie.

-

You’re up before anyone else in the morning, and work on extricating yourself from Jennie’s bed, careful not to wake her. Thankfully, she was a heavy sleeper. You then pad into the bathroom to brush your teeth and look a little more presentable before you ultimately leave to go back to your small apartment. When looking at your reflection in the mirror, you noticed there were bags under your eyes; unsurprising to you, because you had ended up not being able to sleep at all that night. Whether it was the overthinking or the extremely close proximity to the girl that was causing the overthinking, you couldn’t be sure. But, one thing could be said: you were dead tired. A nap would definitely be in order when you finally got home.

Upon finishing in the bathroom, you complete gathering your things before slipping out, still unnoticed by the 4 members of the household you were in.

-

At home, you distracted yourself until it was nearly noon. You decide to make lunch, hoping a warm meal will make you feel at least a little better. Though after eating, you found that the festering feeling of guilt in the pit of your stomach isn’t sated by something so simple. You rush to your bathroom, that feeling now making you sick. And now when you look at yourself in the mirror, you notice the ugly bruises that mar your skin; becoming more visible from where she was a little too rough with you last night.

But if all of this was something you agreed to, why now did you regret it so much? Whatever. It happened, it’s over. For the moment, at least.

You needed a nap, you remember.

-

When you wake up it’s 8:00 p.m. You check your phone; there’s 3 missed calls and 6 texts from her.

           1:30 p.m.

Jennie: (Y/N) where did u go??

Jennie: did you just leave?

Jennie: u didn’t even say goodbye :(

          4:23 p.m.

Jennie: is smthn wrong?

          5:10 p.m.

Jennie: (Y/N) pls answer my calls

Jennie: im worried.

It’d be decent of you to let her know you’re alright, so you give her a call back. The line on the other end rings for a few seconds before it’s answered.

“(Y/N)? God, I was really worried.. Why’d you leave without letting me know?”

“I’m sorry. I had some work at home I needed to take care of. I would have woken you up, but we were both up late and you looked like you needed some sleep.”

“Oh,” She replied, calmer now. “Well, I’m glad you got home safe,” Jennie hesitated, seemingly about to say something else. An awkward silence loomed over the two of you, the only sound being made by the soft static of the phone. “Um, the members and I were going to go out to dinner.. Did you have any plans?” Jennie asked with a nervous lilt to her voice.

You weigh your options for a moment, should you go, or stay? Going would mean pushing down those ugly feelings once again, denying yourself the solace of a silent evening in your own home; a safe space free of anything that reminded you of her. Staying would mean you could try to forget.

“I can’t.. I’m really sorry,”

Sorry. You were always sorry. “Maybe some other time? I just really have some stuff I have to finish before the week is out.”

“Oh, uh, yeah of course!” You hear. It’s a weak attempt at sounding positive even though you know she’s disappointed. “I hope you finish everything you need to.”

“Thank you, have fun at dinner.” You reply, saying your goodbyes and hanging up the phone.

The rest of the night is spent in your bed. You’re not able to sleep thanks to the nap you took, so you watch a movie, play on your phone, pretty much whatever to keep you distracted from the stuff that’s really bothering you. But eventually, you’re bored and you end up staring at the ceiling, thinking once more about everything.

I didn’t expect it to bother me this much, but here we are.

I still like Jennie, I think. Maybe just as friends. I want to be friends with her.

I can’t do this anymore. It’s too much. The bruises are sore and the marks are still there.

There’s no way I can actually talk to her about it though. She’d be disappointed. I can’t disappoint her.

These thoughts are all scrambled as they switch places in the forefront of your mind; they stress you out, make you feel sick again, but you just lay there and deal with it.

-

You wake up once again with barely any restful sleep. Following your normal routine, you get ready, eat, check your phone, etc. It’s a pretty mundane day so far, nothing’s particularly bothering you (you know that’s not necessarily true, but in the moment, you’re fine).

Until you hear a knock at your door.

Your heart drops when you realize it could only be one person: Jennie. Getting up from the couch, you walk to the door and open it, finding her just behind it.

“Hey.”

“Hey, uh, come in.”

You step aside and gesture for her to come inside, closing the door behind her.

“I know something’s been going on with you. You’re usually not so distant,” She paused, looking down. “Was it because of what happened two days ago? I thought we both felt the same way about it.”

You sit back down on the couch after following her to your living room.

“Jennie. I’m bad at this kind of stuff, you know. I just didn’t really know how to act. I didn’t think you’d come over..”

“Why wouldn’t I? I was worried.”

“This isn’t working out anymore.” You tell her, rushing your words and starting to feel clammy because it hurts you to say the words you’ve been holding in for so long.

She looks at you, shocked. You could only imagine what must be running through her head right now.

“I don’t know what you mean.. what isn’t?” Jennie asks, her voice unusually timid and small.

And now for the waterworks. Everything had just been building up before now, and you couldn’t hold back. You felt tears prick at the corner of your eyes, and seconds later they were streaming down your cheeks.

“I just - everything that’s happened lately has been.. a lot. I think we moved a little too fast and at first I was okay - I was fine with everything. I don’t know what changed but… are you using me Jennie?”

It was really just word-vomit at this point. And who could blame you? You were running on nerves for the most part, and on the verge of really breaking down.

Her jaw dropped.

“Are you fucking serious? How could you think - No, of course I’m not!”

You flinched when she rose her voice. God, that must have looked pathetic.

“I’m sorry. I just thought - I don’t know what I thought.”

“Yeah, it’s apparent,” Jennie bit back, tone laced with hostility. “You know what? I’m done. Talk to me when you’re not being so fucking difficult, (Y/N).”

She turned on her heels and walked out the door, leaving you with no time to react or reply in any way. It hurt a lot, to say the least. However, it’s not surprising. Jennie was using you, you were sure, so matter what she told you moments ago. You sighed, now being left with nothing but a broken spirit and aching body. What were you supposed to do now? Jennie was gone. You didn’t particularly want her to return, but it was more than a little upsetting to see your friend of nearly 2 years leave you like that.

Some things just happen though, and you’ve come to discover now that ignorance isn’t bliss.

[venomous-witch]

Pissed off. I’ve hardly seen you in 4 weeks- just an hour or two here and there. And you turn down a simple dinner invite. No homework. My birthday dinner? No homework. I dropped my entire schedule after a full day of school to come on base and not only finish my essay- but finish yours too? And you want to work out and play video games instead… after the lightest week of class in the program so far. Yep I see. That made me feel unimportant. Made me feel second to your alone time, which you’ve had more than a full week of to relax once you get home. It hurts when I give my all while juggling my busy ass schedule while you have a single course and can’t seem to handle it? What will happen when you fully enroll at university- will we crumble? Will you crumble? Shit hurts my heart when you are like this- and it’s so so rare that you get like this but somehow it makes it hurt more. All I do is miss you and dream of the next time I get to see you but im not so sure that you feel as deeply as i do. I want to call you and wake you up and tell you how you made me feel but I know your last long day of the course is tomorrow- but I really don’t want to be pissed at you at the little graduation ceremony. Maybe im obsessed I don’t know. I don’t know if I feel too deeply or think about you too much, you haven’t really displayed to miss me as much that I have missed you. I had a hellish week- yet you still don’t visit. I think I need to communicate that I want you to be the person who shows up regardless, that I need you to just show up and fucking be there. But nope, you go to your stupid little barracks room and take long naps and watch YouTube instead of supporting me in the last stretches of senior year. I know this is all coming out strongly now as I’ve been ruminating on it all evening, I know I don’t typically feel so strongly or this much hurt on this subject in any given day. Maybe I’ve had my fill of this behavior and I need to bite back a little, show some fangs a bit to really get my point across- the last time we visited this was almost a whole year ago and you said you understood. Maybe you need to be reminded with a little heavier of a hand because I refuse to be treated as second class or as a static girlfriend that you can just come to, waiting, anytime that you want. What about what I want and need? I need to be more vocal about that. It drives me nuts that he’s not as vocal as I am on expressing things like this, and he’s a little oblivious and can’t catch a vibe sometimes. That sounds mean but I’m still fuming. It’s a mildly recurring theme and I really need to nip this in the bud. Like dude, really? I’m busier than you- still giving my all and dropping everything to support you. And I don’t really feel like I’ve gotten the same. I’m the one always asking when are we going to hang out next, not you. How the fuck did this end up being a pants wearing matter???? Sure feels like it. I hate to go to bed angry and I suppose couples get into it occasionally so I guess we’re overdue, I just hate that I can’t see him and share how I’m feeling tomorrow. I either call him tomorrow, or address it after the graduation. I really don’t want to let this fester all the way till Wednesday uggghhhhh. Shit is so stupid I know. I’m fuming over something so small, but is it so small if it sits so firey within myself? I don’t know, I know only I can answer that question myself. Ugh maybe I’ll shoot him a text saying we need to talk tomorrow, I know it’ll cause anxiety between both of us but fuck dude you can’t just be so oblivious and go about the motions and not realize how often you decline us having just a few hours together. How much it hurts sometimes and for you to just stay home and play video games? I know you’re tired. I know exactly how you feel. Senior year has kicked my ass and then some. But here I am, still arranging us having time together through my endless tons of term projects it seems. Why is it always my responsibility? Tell me your side of the story I want to know.

Part of me fears that you’re not as dedicated as I am. I know you’re not as verbal as I am, that actual words are not your forte or that it’s your love language. But damn man, it would be nice to hear that you feel as deeply as I do, that you are in fact as devoted as me- that you want to share the world together. Reassure me that it’s you and me and that I am the priority. That you’ll, on your own accord, seek my patent’s blessing for marriage- not something that I arrange and plant the seed in your brain. I want you to be proactive, dominant, on top of it all. More traditional than id like to willingly admit I’m sure, I want a ring and a proposal but that all cannot start until you take the step and show me, without my suggestion, that this is your pure intent. That this is your shining priority. I’m sure this will hurt your feeling to hear, but it’s true. I don’t want to be the one making suggestions to someone who is oblivious to their partner’s needs and desires. Idk. That was a lot, I feel like I’m a lot. Wonder how you’ll feel?

[undlewear]

Yknow when you just get gradually sanded down emotionally until youre like a weird pulp honestly my whole life has been this from various sources for various reasons but quite frankly its an entirely different experience when its coming from someone i dont love at all or truly give any shits about at all like. when people i love did this shit to me at least i had that to comfort me about it i dunno, was like water to swallow a nasty horse pill or something. did it mean i didnt resent them for it later, no, but it certainly delayed the process and also made it far easier to forgive. i sleep like shit and then i wake up and feel like shit and then i go out and dont want to seek out any seratonin boosts for myself at all for like hours its like a weird intentional withdrawal of any sort of joy because im being made to feel like i dont deserve it for …truly petty asinine shit that like …nobody else gives a shit about actually? like a bagel or a plant or a stain on the counter like literally not exaggerating. i dont want to listen to music i dont want to eat i dont want to draw i dont want to play games or watch videos i just want to wallow and fester in anger for some reason and i also want to get into my car and drive away and never come back or look back. i signed a lease i live here and when this person wasnt home for like two weeks it was pretty good aside from all the responsibilities i was left with (doing for free btw while also managing work and school lmfao?) but like they come home and immediately its chaotic again immediately i dont look forward to coming back to my apartment even after being in school from 8 am to 5 pm today i still was like nah dont really wanna go home but i gotta? to get nagged and bitched at about random ass shit, to constantly get asked for help for dumb shit, to be passively aggressively nagged too. how is it that im in the same situation i was back home where i didnt even want to leave my room or do anything at all every day but instead one of the people i live with is someone who simply does not know me or care to and therefore i gotta worry about offending them if i dont feel like leaving the goddamn door open every waking hour or at all, i never have liked leaving the door open to my space because its my space and its only open to people i share it with so why would i leave it open for people who dont reside in here with me? this shit is so scrambled and a total clusterfuck and makes no sense but i am truly festering and boiling under the surface every waking moment for the past few days. why is it that everyone else’s problems and trauma or whatever the fuck is wrong with them always precedes me so when im bothered by stuff i just gotta eat it to preserve their well being and prevent a fuckin meltdown or something, just gotta eat that fuckin irritation over and over and over again and it never goes anywhere and then people wonder why im always a little pissed off or a little withdrawn. the compassion fatigue shit that i have (look it up its normal and common when people use you as an emotional support dog for the better part of your life, thanks mom n dad n other supporting cast of random strangers) anyway this compassion fatigue shit would probably yknow heal itself or gradually get better if i could go more than a month without being dragged down into somebody’s mud or blamed for their mud but that shit just aint gonna happen while living with this individual. i mean how can she not see her whole fuckin family fears her in some way or another, whole family is bored and tired of the antics, you go through life thinking everybody else is at fault for every negative feeling you endure. probably sounds weird coming from me complaining about someone this whole post but lol i know my suffering stems from a lot of shit that i did to myself and behaviors that i didnt correct/address and trauma that i buried rather than expressing it up front lol i cant blame everybody else for everything i mean a lot of it is on me but this shit ??? this shit aint

[dingleautomotives]

I can totally see the Maxine episodes being about the reveal. Im so not excited for this. Im not going to enjoy the adorable scenes between them knowing that Rob has a secret. And this is just going to make Aaron even shittier. All the Rob stuff from that episode have been crap. We got no insight to how he felt and the ones we saw didn't really give us much information. I would have preferred that the ONS didnt happen at all..but we can't get everything I guess

Hey nonnie

Yeah I think I had deluded myself into thinking that it was only gonna fester for like 2 weeks ? and when i think about robert hiding this until may i get… really unhappy feelings. yeah. yikes. 

“i would have preferred that the ONS didn’t happen at all” hahahah i mean. yeahhhhhhhhhhh. i have yet to talk to anyone who is pro-ONS. like “u kno wut. rob/bex hook up. best thing in emmerdale in ages.” 

it was… a fucking blow. i’m still extremley bitter and sad and occasionally dip into bouts of #hopelessness over it lmao. i’m just actively living in denial and stupidly placing all my bets on emmerdale doing a #GoodJob with this moving forward because i’m trash and i’m not going anywhere no matter what so i have to hope for the best u kno

but yeah. sigh. idk what this answer is. i’m tired and incoherent lmao sorry

[primadonnatartuffe]

RYAN: *after hanging out with orchid, ryan's been feeling a little lighter, and leaving skaia to visit people has become that much easier. so with that feeling of freedom, she decides to stop by odimist again. she drapes on colt for a little while before she devotes her time to finn and his new baby. she's just as gorgeous as in the photos, and during the visit, she's found she's really quite fond of hanging out with tiny babies... they're in the living room at colt and little's place, and ryan has lounging with this bundle in her arms for a while now.*

RYAN: hmm sofia sofia... are there any songs about a girl named sofia? there should be.

FINN: -finn's sitting next to the two of them and it's so cute watching sofia get to know ryan. sofia's looking pretty comfortable and staring up at ryan- no but you can replace any song with shakira with sofia

RYAN: ooooh yeah there you go.

RYAN: lets sing beautiful liar.

RYAN: i can be beyonce and sofia can be shakira.

RYAN: ryonce ryonce sofia sofia.

RYAN: lets not kill the karma. lets not start a fight. its not worth the drama for a beautiful liiiaar.

FINN: -sofia gurgles-

RYAN: yeah girl there you go.

RYAN: *snickers*

FINN: already she's more musically inclined than me

RYAN: stick with me kid and well keep you on the right track. *smiles wide at baby*

FINN: -sofia smiles back for a good two seconds and wiggles her arms-

RYAN: uggh shes so cute.

FINN: -he's laughing a little and smiling because he loves this baby so much- i know

FINN: you'd think i'd be used to it by now

RYAN: pretty sure youre never gonna get used to it though. thats just how these things work.

RYAN: my parents still cant get over how cute i am. ;)

RYAN: well nobody can really.

FINN: -too true- it's a hard life

RYAN: for you. us adorable people got it so good. isnt that right sofia?

FINN: -sofia yawns-

FINN: i'm going to be dead in a week at this rate

FINN: just because of the cute from sofia and you combined

RYAN: cool. then i can steal her. >:)

FINN: you're just going to swoop right in and take her

RYAN: yep. and raise her teaching her to better weaponize her deadly cuteness.

RYAN: well be unstoppable.

FINN: sorry sofia i tried to give you a better life

RYAN: time to live a life of villainy with auntie ryan.

FINN: this escalated quickly

RYAN: *SNRK* i think thats the inevitable path when dealing with baby stealing.

FINN: did i turn out to be a villain

FINN: i guess that depends on your definition of -air quotes- stolen

RYAN: i think the definition of stolen is pretty clear cut... but maybe theres a side of finn i dont know... an evil side.

FINN: maybe there is

RYAN: oh my... ;o

FINN: what is that face

RYAN: its a face thats onto your wild ways.

FINN: someone's a little late

RYAN: pfff. okay lets be real were all onto your wild ways.

FINN: i was going to say

FINN: out of all people you really can't be that surprised

RYAN: i really cant be... not when i was there instigating it half the time. *snickers some more. they have fun.*

FINN: -they had a lot of fun. he's still laughing, shaking his head- see exactly

RYAN: *looks down at the baby for a moment after that. the pause is enough for her mind to wander. it's hard to fill in the space with positive thoughts these days.*

RYAN: hey uh this is out of the blue but...

RYAN: the other day? at the kareoke bar? ive been worried that i like.

RYAN: made things weird?? somehow.

FINN: -sofia's getting sleepy. she might be starting to doze off. finn is caught off guard by the question, not exactly expecting it- oh -he says it like a question-

FINN: why what do you mean

RYAN: i dunno.

RYAN: like... i know i was super transparent with the song choices.

RYAN: the mood just seemed to change after i sang that second time.

RYAN: and then you took off.

RYAN: like maybe you thought you were third wheeling or something.

RYAN: uhh... okay so i dont usually make a habit of addressing things like this but ive been encouraged to talk about the stuff thats nagging at my mind.

RYAN: so it doesnt start festering and i have to turn to booze or something to cope haha.

RYAN: ... yeah.

FINN: oh -he definitely doesn't want to make her feel like she has to cope with anything...not because of him, at least.- no no i get it uh

FINN: i don't know i guess i just

FINN: you know when you feel like you're in the middle of something really intimate that's not explicitly so but it still is

FINN: but you feel like you're in the way of it a little

FINN: that was where i was at i guess but it's not a big deal you guys need your time too

RYAN: *frowns* i dunno... i guess.

RYAN: its not like theres a quote unquote you guys.

FINN: -he looks away and shrugs a little- hasn't there always been though

RYAN: ... not anymore.

FINN: i mean i know not technically but -he sighs- it's still there

RYAN: *brows knit* yeah maybe for me.

FINN: i mean jack is completely different than he was three years ago and it's not like we talked during the time you were gone

FINN: so i guess i can't read him anymore but i mean it really seems like there's still something

FINN: but anyway i just

FINN: had a feeling i shouldn't be there

FINN: and it's good you two are hanging out

FINN: and having moments

FINN: and stuff

FINN: after everything

RYAN: *he says all that, but why does it feel like there's something left unsaid. is she being paranoid?* do you really feel that way?

FINN: which part

FINN: i mean it doesn't matter because i do really feel all of it

RYAN: ... i guess that part where you think its good were hanging out and having moments like you said.

FINN: oh

FINN: yeah

FINN: it's a good thing

RYAN: ugggh.

RYAN: why do i feel like its not?? am i being paranoid?

RYAN: maybe im projecting because im afraid to make any moves and i need an excuse not to.

RYAN: i dont know i suck at reading my feelings and intuitions or whatever.

FINN: -he looks ahead- it's hard to know i guess

FINN: after all that time

FINN: you can only really be certain of how you feel

RYAN: *sighs a little. she does know how she feels, at least when it comes to jack.*

RYAN: okay but... i dont wanna make hanging out with us awkward.

FINN: sometimes i just have to discern whether or not i should be there

FINN: it's a life thing

RYAN: ... i guess so.

RYAN: sorry.

RYAN: im being weird.

FINN: no you're not

FINN: i was probably acting pretty weird

FINN: that raises a lot of questions

RYAN: maybe. i probably shouldnt pry. *it raises questions, but none of the questions she should probably be asking... but it doesn't really occur to her.*

RYAN: *face scrunches a little... she looks upset.* i just dont know what im doing anymore. im a mess and i know im supposed to just let myself be a mess and let people help me but i dont want to.

RYAN: i dont even want to talk about this. but i should?? ugh. im not making sense.

FINN: -his expression softens immediately- no no i

FINN: i get that actually

FINN: -he can relate in different ways...but he can still relate to the general concept-

FINN: it's hard

RYAN: *sniffs and leans against him a little, as much as she can without disturbing the baby.* but im lonely too... i dont wanna bring anybody down or make anybody feel bad but this always seems to happen now and i cant shut it off.

FINN: -lets it happen and leans his head against hers just slightly- well you know you always have me

FINN: whether or not you can shut it off

RYAN: *peeks up at him with big tired glossy eyes* ... thanks finn.

FINN: -dONT LOOK AT HIM LIKE THAT- yeah

FINN: of course

FINN: you're pretty much stuck with me whether you like it or not

RYAN: heheh... good to know.

FINN: it thought it would be at least a little comforting -he's quiet suddenly-

RYAN: it helps... trust me. *peers at him again when a silence follows.*

RYAN: whats on your mind?

FINN: -avoids meeting her gaze and looks down at a sleeping sofia instead. he sighs- i should uh

FINN: i mean

FINN: i don't want things to be weird

RYAN: *blinks at him, confused* weird??

FINN: yeah weird uh

FINN: i don't know how to say it

FINN: actually uh

FINN: -holds his hands out for sofia-

RYAN: ... okay. *hands her back to him, getting a weird feeling in her gut.*

FINN: -sofia makes a few fussy noises before going back to sleep like nothing had happened-

FINN: i just don't want you to feel stuck so

FINN: if you need to leave you can

RYAN: *leans away again, not really sure what to make of that.* im not really in a rush unless you need me to go...

FINN: no i just mean you might want to uh

FINN: you might want to

FINN: the thing is i should tell you

FINN: even though it will do nothing

FINN: but make things weird

FINN: and somehow it's the right thing to do supposedly

FINN: i don't know why that is

FINN: it doesn't seem like it's going to help at all

RYAN: help... what?? what is it? *she's TRYING not to act weirded out even though she kind of is. but it's mostly just anxiety.*

FINN: i

FINN: have feelings for you

FINN: but it's dumb and it doesn't matter and it's irrelevant

RYAN: you... *processing... processing... but she fails to.*

RYAN: what?

FINN: -his cheeks grow red and he looks a little embarrassed-

FINN: i know it's

FINN: i know it's been obvious probably

FINN: it started years ago before you left and uh

FINN: surprise

FINN: still here

RYAN: uh... *runs a hand through her hair, reeling a little* no?? i mean no it was never obvious to me.

RYAN: jesus was i always so into my own shit i didnt even notice?

RYAN: thats typical. way to go ryan.

FINN: oh

FINN: no it's not your fault you didn't need to pick up on it i didn't want you to anyway

FINN: so points for me

FINN: i guess

RYAN: i... okay...

RYAN: well uh... im glad you brought that up. to get it off your chest? or...

RYAN: shit. im not sure what to say.

RYAN: like its cliched to be all i really like you too BUT...

RYAN: thats cliched and shitty?? you deserve better than that.

RYAN: hahaha you deserve better than me? come on dude lets be real.

FINN: -he just feels bad about it- no i know you don't feel

FINN: like i know you don't feel the same way and that's fine that's okay

FINN: like i didn't expect that or anything i know it's like

FINN: uh

FINN: i don't want to talk about what i deserve because i don't think i really

FINN: i don't want to measure myself that way because i'm not going to pass the test

FINN: you don't have to like

FINN: try to reason with me i know it's useless

FINN: it's always been you and jack from the beginning

FINN: there was never any other real relationship for either of you when you're together

FINN: you asked what's on my mind that's what's on my mind that's why i've been acting weird you don't need to fix it or feel responsible for anything i just

FINN: maybe if you know i can get over it who knows

FINN: or i wreck our friendship i don't know

FINN: i'm pretty good at that haha

RYAN: no finn thats not... thats not gonna happen. im just...

RYAN: *eyes start to water* it sucks that things are the way they are. that i cant... reciprocate i guess.

RYAN: i dont know why im always... chasing after people that im not good for haha. but hey on the bright side thats the case no matter what isnt it?? im not good for anybody.

RYAN: jacks better off without me. so was nona. so are you.

RYAN: and you should know that because yeah itd be in your best interest to move on from that.

RYAN: i know you werent trying to start anything but i-- just... why...

RYAN: im so fucked up.

-- impenetrableVitality [IV] is now an idle chum! --

FINN: -he doesn't know who the fuck nona is but he decides right now isn't the time to ask. hearing her say these things about herself...it stings.- no no no

FINN: i'm not

FINN: i'm not

FINN: fuck

FINN: it doesn't matter if you reciprocate or not and it's

FINN: you're making me sound like some kind of ideal candidate but that's not the case either

FINN: you don't see how much you're worth because you think you've fucked up beyond redemption or something

FINN: but that isn't true

FINN: we all have our shit

FINN: yours looks different than mine

FINN: jack's looks different than both yours and mine

FINN: but somehow you're still here and jack's still here even if we were all gone for a while

FINN: it's not about being good enough that is -lets out an unamused laugh- that's bullshit because who even meets that standard in the first place

FINN: what i do know is that without you around it felt like there was something irreplaceable missing

FINN: the whole time

FINN: sure maybe i became better at putting that feeling behind work but

FINN: i never stopped feeling it

FINN: because damn it ryan you are and you've always been one of a kind and i'm not just saying that

FINN: people that are like you aren't good enough

FINN: i want the real thing hanging around

FINN: crazy theatrical ryan

FINN: loud always pretty no matter what ryan

FINN: you're just -he looks down at sofia- you're worth more than you could ever realize

FINN: a few turns down some paths you don't like don't take that away from you

FINN: i need you to stick around and stay because if your shit makes it so you don't deserve to have people in your life then i am

FINN: i am right there with you

FINN: i'm not buying it

FINN: -he finally stops and...might be tearing up a little-

RYAN: *well, she's definitely started crying listening to all that, but the tears flow quietly. when he's through, she sniffs, trying to process everything with some difficulty... but the important parts stick and she leans forward to gingerly wrap her arms around his neck (careful not to squish sofia) and hold him gently.*

RYAN: youre really important to me... i hope you know.

FINN: -he closes his eyes a little and the tears just roll down his cheeks as she holds him- yeah

FINN: you are to me too

RYAN: ... jack told me that the worst was over.

RYAN: ive been trying really hard to believe that.

RYAN: it hurts knowing how much i was missed but its a relief too? i dont wanna run from people anymore...

FINN: you don't have to

FINN: maybe it's time to start running to people

RYAN: *sniffs* yeah... im gonna... crash into everyone at high speeds.

RYAN: hope you can handle a whole lot of ryan.

FINN: i'm pretty sure i've been training all my life so i'm good

RYAN: fuckin... right on. hehehe... *giggles softly, but then starts to pull away again.*

RYAN: i should probably get going home now though.

FINN: -smiles and nods at her, taking a deep breath- yeah

FINN: i have to put this one to bed anyway

RYAN: yeah... goodnight baby girl. *exhales once more, letting all the bad feelings pass... it's gonna be okay.*

RYAN: ill see you soon finn. *gets up off the couch and makes her leave.*

FINN: -it is. it's really going to be okay- bye ryan

[chris-hattori]

When the Future comes today partlV

Hi Guys It’s part lV Yea the manny erorrs 😆 sorry😂 XXX Chris

Part lll ends afther Mari Breakdown

IT WASN’T A DATE

“Tikki” scrme Adrien “ What is happen?” he piced Marinette up from the ground and carrying her in her room. “ I don’t know” creys the Kwami, Plagg hug her “ It is different than usual” Adrien put her on the couch. He take her hand and remembered what Tikki said “ You said it’s different this time, I gets worse right” Tikki nod “We are here, sweetheart have no fear” says Plagg and embrace her.

Marinette open her eyes it was dark and she coulden’t see her owen hand “ Are you the new Ladybug oft this century ?” aske a voice in the dark “ Ye…Yes i'm” she look around but she saw nothing. “ Who are you?” ask she "You don’t need to know this, you will not remeber anything about the talk” “ oh good there is also much to remember for me” replied she sarcastally she hear the laught “ Be ready for the three exams” She reaized at the first that she wasn’t longer laying on the balcony ground when she open her eyes. She tried to straighten up, but an arm pushed her down. Adrien knelt beside her and was aslep, carefully she tried to push his arm away. He opened his eyes” Mari is everything all right again?” she felt guilty that she had woken him up "Yes, i think, did Tikki call you?” he stand up, her hand reaching for him he took it. “No, i just wated talk with you, and when i arrived here..” when she tried to get up, he sat beheind her and put his armes around her “ Tell me whats happen? “ she put tired her head on his breast “ I thought about what happenend today, suddenly, i felt so much hate” she shiver, he sighed “ You don’t believe Leihla or?” “I’m not sure…how did you know what i mean?” he laughed “Tikki told me everything” “ Oh,” she blush “ Where is Tikki?” he pointer to her pillow Tikki was sleept next to it and hugged Plagg. They looked sweet. ” Do you remember the thing with Alya and Lady Wifi?”asked he smailing “You mean when my best friend got akumatized and she wanted to know who Ladybug really is? Sure why?” “when she said that Chloe was Ladybug i was frustrated” she let her head hanging “ Oh because you didn’t notice it right?” “ No, you silly Bug. It was because i never liked her like that and believe she would be Ladybug don’t changed my feelings for her.” her heart beat fester “That you are Ladybug it’s great, but it dosen’t mean much to me. ” she turned to him and put her hand on his cheek “ And what if i give up now and…” he put his forehead to her ” Promise me that you don’t give up. I know you’re afraid, but if you run away now, you wouldn’t forgive that to yourself” she looked at him and knew he was right. “ I’ ll try” she smils and dissolved “ good i have an other question” he looks pretty nervos to her ” Nino Text me this evening and ask me stuff” he bekam red “ I couldn’t answer him” she looks confused to him “Why you couldn’t that?” “ Because he ask me one thing thet was verry dificuld to answer” she still looked questionigly at him “if you where… Ahm we where..” he stammeln. “ you'er what.. come on Kitty spell it, it couden’t be so bad” laught she “ He asked me if we were a coupel” he whispered it “Oh.. Ahm..” now she was red “ I don’t wona lie to him, so i didn’t answer him befor i talk to you, but you brakedown befor..”he couldn’t look into her eyes “oh yes that was a good idea” answer she “ Mari? What i ve to tell him tomorrow?” “ I’ ve no idea this happen to me the first time” he looked quesioningly “ No, one has ever asked you?” she blush “ No, i haven’t a Fanclub like someone here” he giggle “ yea trust me, you have a fanclub too” Her eyes grew bigger. ” Stop kidding me kitty” she blushes “ By the way, I’m sorry for that with Nino” a smile crept on her face “ Don’t worry. That was Alya she has been trying to becams more informationen about today. so she could make a plan to set me up with you“ She blushes more he saw her smile, she lookd adorabel. “Yes, they two are a grate coupel, they had a date today, but i didn’t mean that” she surprist look to him “ When i tried to set you up with Nino, that was a really stupid idea, i’m glad that he have lie to you and…” Her smile seemed sad, he put his hand on her cheek “ Whats wrong? Do you regret that i didn’t set you up with Nino” ” No, yor’re right it was a stupid idea and i’m glad for Alya, but i don’t know.. You know that between us, it’s a really bad idea.. We are… you know Partner.. “ murmurs she to him. He smiled softly “you should still sleep” he took slowley Plagg “ Hey we shoud go home buddy” “ But what do you want to tell Nino?” asked she amazement “hmm” he embrace her “ I’ ll told him the truth about the hole day and that i’ve a totaly crush on you” she was silent, he knows that she was to ashamde to answer he leaned forward and kiss her. He gently released her lips again “Befor i forgot to say it, for me its the first time too, even though the Fanclub” says he and desappeared in the night.

“ I’ve got the feeling that everyone knowes it” says she to Tikki “ You’re just imagining this “ says Tikki “ But he kissd me…Tikki it’s posible that you’ re serching someone” Tikki looks caught to Marinette “yes sorry I was looking for Plagg” Marinette giggle she was standying in front oft the coach“ Do you know Plagg well isn’t it?” aske Marinette an stubbed her “ Of corse i know him well, he’s my husband” ” What! When did you see him the last time? ” Tikki sit down on her sholder “ The last time i’ve see him was. Hmm let me think about, yes with Jeanne at 1412 that was the last time” Marinette lookt confuset to her “ Good morning Marinette” says Alya Tikki hide just in time “ Ready for the class camp? This will surely be two greate weeks” “Good morning Alya” she hug her. “ Hi you two” wave Nino and stand to them, he grin to Marinette “ Did you have a nice day yesterday?”bofor she cuold aswer a silver car drivers forward and Adrien got of the car, he waved to them. Nino rushed to him “ Hey Dude” says Nino. Marinette smiled at him shyly and wave back. She remeber the kiss and was burning red again “ Here you are at last” Says Chloe to him and clung to his arm “ you have to sit with me, of course, we are to the backward” Adrien scrematch his face, she dragged him Into the coach “ Did you see that?” says Alya “ yes and?” asket Marinette “ come on de should get inn” Alya looks shocked to Nino who cames back. As they all found there places and the Coach drive off. Alya couldn’t hold it any longer “ whats wrong with you girl” placed her out she was sitting netx to Marinette “ hmm” Marinette looked briefly up at her modem magazine “ Are you kidding me? I saw you two yesterday morning at your Date! you’re totally crushed walket to Paris” “ It wasn’t a date” Alya rolled her eyes and scoffed. Marinettes Phone vibrates, she ophen the message: ‘I’m sorry, i could say no’ she smeild softly “Who text you? “ ask Nino “ Adrien” “ He Text you that , afer your Date yesterday?” Marinette sight and text him back : ‘Its okey do you need somthing ?’ Garlic or a crucifix? :-D ’ “ Alya it wasn’t a Date” “that isn’t the point. Why aren’t you not jealous, When he does the same with her?” Marinette sighed and put the magazine away. Nino looked at them “I trust him and he dosen’t do the same with her” her Phone vibrates again ’ I need your help Bagaboo ‘ she tured and looked to him. He made a linky face and she giggle “And I would probably be jealous, if i didn’t know that he don’t like her”Alya crossed her arms “And you believe him” Marinette smailes and writing him back : ‘maybe i can halp you how urgent is that ?’ “ look at his face” says she Alya did it “ Looks he like yesterday, when he was with me” Alya teased “ No not really, but why he sit there, when he don’t want this?” ask Nino “He dosen’t want hurt her feelings but he repent it” she giggle and show her Phone “ he aske me for help” “ and you don’t help him?” says Nino and lookt to his buddy she just wanted to take her magazine back as her Phone vibrates again ‘Could you please finaly help me’ she turn around, Chloe was talking with Sabrina, he saw Marinettes viwe, she got ruth and write back: ‘ Okey tell her your are car sick and come to us’ she giggle and put her Phone away. She look to Nino “ Don’t worry He’ll come forward” Alya threw her hand dramatically over her forehead “ okey whats happen yesterday at the Date” Marinette sight “He only needed my help to buy a few thigs for the trip, it wasn’t a Date” Alya look her friend in the eyes “ You know that he have canceld Nino for your Date?” she roll her eyes “ Yes, he told me this and it wasn’t a Date” “Why do you say that all the time? You spend yesterday time with him alone and you had fun it was a Date. ” “okee yes we had lot of fun and we where alone, but you spend yesterday time with Nino alone too was that a Date?” ask Marinette grinning. Alya stood up, to sit next to Nino. He looked confused “ how did you know, that about our Date?” Marinette froze Alya never told her that, only Adrien did this yesterday, in the evening, it was a trap. Adrien stood by the Seat row and sat beseide Marinette down. “Thank you Mari, you saved my life” he saw her face “ Whats wrog, aren’t you okay?” she showed up to Alya, “ It look like i need the Garlic” murmurs she, he look to Nino “ You know what’s going on here?” asked Adrien “ I have no idea bro” answer Nino and look at Alya “ They have spend the whole day together yesterday” says Alya jubelnd, a few classmeats look to her. Marinette took the magazine to hide her red face. ” Yes, he told me that” says Nino “And why do you don’t say that to me too?” he shruggel “ You don’t aske me” Adrien smiled and took the magazine down “ How do you feel?” ask he smilend “Ashamed” he giggle “I don’ t mean that” she took the magezine away “ Im just tired otherwise everything is fine” she frown “ What did you tell him?” “ oh hmm..let me think about it.” He tapped his lips “ He said what” srecms Alya shoket, the classmates look surprisd to Alya again. Marinette blush “ we two should clarfy this” he looks mischievous to Marinette and put his hand on her. “It ‘s still 7 hour to Marseille we have time.”

So Part V will come soon, with the title: Will she be mine😉