#everything is crashing down On me n i am just to exhausted 2 give a shit
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bittercandysweetrain · 1 year ago
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Tokyo revengers x reader with mental illness Draken {Pt1}
Illness - Bipolar disorder 
(warning mention of suicide, drug use) 
(y/n)'s pov - I am Bipolar I've had it for a long time now. I hate people who romanticize it like it's such a dream to have. They love the intensity of it they love the mania because they love excitement. that's why movies always have those doped up people their life like there is no tomorrow. As if it's something so simple to handle but it’s exhausting. it's tiring to be in your own skin, the best I can describe it is having a high nothing can compare to. you feel Invincible have you ever seen a picture of a club aesthetic a hazy picture or a person dancing and having fun the night will never end. you do things and say things that could be very unintentional your not thinking of the next day you make promises you can’t keep. To do things you regret fucking who you want putting yourself in danger cause it gives you a rise and your at the highest peak of everything you could ever reach. and suddenly you crash hard falling from the heavens you become this person you don't even know. smiling hurts, laughing hurts, being awake hurts. constant thoughts of how worthless I am fill my mind, I am unloved, unwanted, alone, and I deserve to sleep forever or die. seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks turn into one giant mix up that I don't keep track of. Did I sleep for two days? was I awake for four? did I shower? did I eat? am I alive? that's all I feel but amongst all that I wish people would understand It isn't a decision it's not like I wanted this, I can't just make it go away.
Author's pov - (y/n) walked next to Inui dressed nicely it had been the first time in a while that she had been out. suffering from her lows for four months now she finally started to hit her highs. "Where are you taking me Inui?" she asked "I want you to meet someone," he said "eh? why?" she asked "because he is my friend and you owe him an apology," he said. "an apology for what?" she asked clicking her arms with his "for punching him on new years eve." Inui said "New years? I didn't punch anyone the hell are you talking about I was dancing with someone had a few drinks made snow angels snowball fight and Uh?" "let me correct you before the 31st you went on a drinking binge remember you got kicked out of 2 clubs. I told you to meet me on the rooftop for the new years eve party you came high on coke yes you were dancing and it was all fun until you wanted to dance on the edge of the rooftop. Draken pulled you down twice and the second time you were mad and punched him in the face. After you made snow angels in the parking lot. tried trading your panties for mitsuya's bike which you ended up stealing. you didn't get far but yes we had a snowball fight until you threw a shoe at takemichi and bruised his eye." he said "also you got mouthy with Mikey you called him a midget" he said before showing up to the Garage.
Draken opened the door seeing Inui and (y/n) "Hell no" he said trying to close the door "wait she is here to apologize" Inui said. (y/n) crossed her arms "I never said I was" she said "(y/n)" Inui gave her a warning tone (y/n) sighed she loved inui he was her best friend and the only one who stuck around in her moments "Okay, okay." she said Draken let the two in Inui sat down on the couch while (y/n) took a look around at the photos and stuff. Draken walked over with some drinks setting them down on the table "(y/n)" Inui called over he usually acted like a older brother sometimes a father when need be. (y/n) walked over sitting next to him "well Inui tricked me to come here but I will apologize for" she dragged the word on as she looked at Inui trying to remember what she did wrong. "punching him in the face on new years eve." he said, "Punching you in the face on new years eve even though it is your fault" (y/n) said. Draken stared at her blankly. "how was it my fault? I was just trying to keep you from falling over the damn railing" Draken said sternly. "so" (y/n) said "so?" Draken asked "who cares if I would have fallen" she said. "Do you really think no one would care." Inui looked down getting up his hand and bawled into a fist. slamming his hand on the nearby wall "h-how could you say something like that I would fucking care!" he shouted, "if you died I would definitely care your my best friend!" he shouted, "we have so many memorable days spent together!" he shouted before pausing he looked at her empty eyes just she gave him a sweet smile to reassure him "your not in your highs yet are you." he asked (y/n) remained silent as she sipped her hot drink. Draken glanced at Inui he had heard many stories about (y/n) especially when it came to him dealing with her depressive episodes. "I wouldn't want you to die" Draken said as he sipped his own drink "honestly even though you punched me it was nothing really, I've been punched countless times you made that night pretty memorable." he said with a smile "Inui always talks about you and that night wasn't the first time I met you. we actually clubbed together a few times that's why I didn't want you to fall it would be really boring you remind me of someone I use to hang out with all the time. you kind of took his place and it made me really happy." draken said
(y/n)'s pov - Sometimes the haze can make your brain foggy. Like with the time jumbling all together everything around me did as well. I thought I was getting better I was looking forward to those highs. I wanted to die, I really did I was blindly following Inui cause I don't have the strength to make my own decisions. this man who I don't remember who do I feel different I feel content around you Draken who are you?
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arcadequeerz · 3 years ago
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p-taryn-dactyl · 2 years ago
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I’ve Got You (sick fic)
a/n: hi everyone! here’s a little Aggie fic that is inspired by events of today (i am sick)! also, Just Another Name part 2 will be posted tonight! Ik right, two fics in one night I’m on fire. anyways, onto the FLUFF word count: 823 warning(s)/trigger warning (i think): mentions of throwing up and nausea (because of illness); tooth rotting fluff; Y/N is written as fem!coded. No but seriously, if throwing up/vomiting is a trigger for you plz don’t read. I just wrote this bc while i was sick today, i wished i had someone to take care of me. tag list: @our-blood-is-our-ink @p-nymph @coolbeans32 (i just thought you might enjoy another agatha fic but be aware of my warnings just in case <3)
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This wasn’t exactly how you hoped the night would go.
Instead of candlelit dinner and flirtatious conversation, here you were, hovering over your toilet, watching as your breakfast and lunch swirled in the water. Sighing, you pressed your cheek against the cold porcelain, taking deep breaths as you tried to calm yourself down.
You had woken up with a small fever, barely over 100 degrees, and achy joints, along with a wonderful headache. But, instead of worrying, you took a few ibuprofens and went about your day.
Yeah, that didn’t work out.
You had just been walking around your home, doing casual chores when suddenly your vision went sideways, everything turning so bright until you could barely see. You stumbled your way into your bathroom, aware of what was about to happen. Now you waited as the clock ticked on and you were unable to move from your spot, every movement causing stiffness and bile to rise in your throat.
“I knew I shouldn’t of had that fifth pop tart. Thor’s rubbing off on me.” You grumbled sarcastically as you felt another wave of nausea crash over you. Unfortunately, you were left dry heaving, the sensation of your chest tightening making you cough until tears clouded your eyes and sweat peppered your brow. You reached up to wipe off the sweat but flinched back by how warm your forehead felt.
“That might be a problem.”
You groaned when you felt your hair fall out of the makeshift bun you had made at the nape of your neck. Holding yourself up with one hand, you used the other to hold as much of your hair as possible. Just as your vision once more started turning bright and giving you vertigo, you heard your front door open, the sound of heels echoing on your floor.
“Y/N?”
Shit. Agatha.
In your compromised state, you had forgotten about date night.
“Y/N?” Her voice got closer, slight annoyance and worry painted in her tone.
“In- In here!” Your voice was raspy and words caught in your throat as the muscles inside contracted.
“Darling, why didn’t you show-” Agatha pushed open the bathroom door, her voice fading as she took in your sick state. Your sweat dowsed lounge clothes, your sunken expression, and of course the position you had taken by the toilet.
“Hi Aggs-” as if it was planning the timing, you felt a crashing wave of nausea fall over you. You hurled into the toilet, tears streaming down your face at the burn in your throat and nose.
“Oh honey, oh dear,” Agatha quickly fell to her knees behind you, gathering your hair in one hand, pulling it away from your face as her other hand rubbed your back in comforting strokes, “It’s okay love, it’s okay, I’ve got you.”
You had no idea how much time had passed but after a while, you felt your body slump against the toilet, exhausted. Agatha twisted your hair into a bun, securing it with the hair tie she always kept on her wrist, and wrapped her arms around your waist, placing her chin on your shoulder as she rubbed circles into your stomach. She raised one hand to check your forehead, gasping at the temperature she found.
“Baby, you’re burning up!”
You merely nodded, sagging into Agatha’s warm body. The witch scooped you up into her arms, muttering to herself.
“I’m going to give you a nice warm bath okay? Then you’re going straight to bed.”
You chuckled lightly, jokingly saluting.
“Yes ma’am!”
Agatha filled up the tub with warm water, sprinkling some bath salts for better relaxation. You peeled the sweat soaked clothes from your body, climbing into the tub. You practically immediately felt immensely better. Agatha washed your hair, humming a soft lullaby, making your eyes droopy. Once the water started to feel cold, Agatha picked you up from the bathtub and wrapped you in a towel.
“I’m going to make the bed, can you put pajamas on?” Her tone wasn’t condescending, but full of worry at your weakened state. Normally, you would fire a sarcastic comment at your girlfriend but you just smiled softly and nodded. Throwing on sleep shorts and an oversized sweatshirt you had definitely not stolen from Tony, you felt comfortable and safe, your body swaying on its feet from the exhaustion. Agatha returned with a cold wash rag in her hands, gesturing for you to lay down on the bed. Once you were lying down, Agatha cuddled up behind you, letting your head rest on her chest as she scratched your head lightly. She placed the cold rag on your forehead, the temperature change both startling you and giving you relief from your pounding head. You snuggled against her, your exhausted body quickly falling into sleep.
Agatha kissed your forehead and she too fell asleep with her arm around your wait and hand gently, absent mindlessly ran her fingers through your hair.
a/n: sorry if it felt rushed! also, idk why, but I’m a sucker for head scratchies so i had to sprinkle a little bit of that in there. hopefully someone enjoyed this, in all honesty tho, i wrote this out of pure self indulgence. love you guys <3
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alreadyblondenow · 4 years ago
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Sweet | Jung Jaehyun
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❤︎ Jaehyun x female!reader ❤︎ Fluff? Smut, Smut, Smut, Smut, Tiny bit of angst, College AU, Established relationship ❤︎ 2/4 for LOVE MONTH SERIES: Boys Don’t Cry One is a big number | You and your words | Sweet | He loves me, he loves me not |
Summary: Jaehyun has always been in love with you but he thinks so highly of you that he never tried pursuing his feelings for you. All throughout your college years, Jaehyun endured every heartbreak secretly whenever you have a new boyfriend and can only love you secretly in his own ways. Wild. College years was wild and its all because of Jaehyun. After college, you and Jaehyun parted ways but life will reunite you again in the most shocking way. Jaehyun’s wedding.  
Word count: 13,707k
Warnings: Sex, sex, sex, and loads of sex, unprotected sex, loss of virginity, making of sex tape (with consent), making of amateur porn? (with consent), cam boys and cam girl?? idk what to call that but they fuck live, mentions of alcohol, period fingering, mentions of tampon, dry humping, oral sex female receiving, mentions of blowjob, slight blowjob scene,  mentions of other idols, swearing, college students who just wanna have fun haha, kissing and touching, fingering, and slight nipple play, mentions of having sex with Johnny. AH SLIGHT BREAK UP SEX! 
A/N: PURE FICTION. PURE FICTION. PURE FICTION. okay, I know I said that this will be out on Jaehyun’s birthday but meh whatever I’m posting it and will post something else for hearts day. hehe. I hope you guys love this even though im just experimenting and trying to write longer fics, and seriously I wanted to write back to back smut with different feels so I guess im crossing that out of my bucket list. Also this is proof read once only so sorry. You may not be happy with the ending but I’m sure as hell happy with it so sorry. ​
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Humans are prone to fall in love with the wrong people and the only thing you can do about it is to forgive yourself and move on. No matter how much history you had, no matter how many special moments or intimate ones you shared… if you know that he or she is not the right person for you then, you know.
Like this moment right now. For exactly ten minutes, you will realize why you and a certain someone never worked out.
“Hey, boss you have a 10 am meeting. Planning for everything” Your assistant says as you double-check your schedule to see the name of the client she’s talking about. “That’s the bride though, 0% progress for the wedding” she added.
“Yikes” you murmur and ready your stuff, “let’s fix that and give her a beautiful wedding. I need you to take down everything she says while I talk to her” you straighten your clothes and fix yourself before you face the client.
The moment you enter the room, the bride greets you with a big smile like she’s saying ‘thank you for saving me and my wedding’ even though you literally haven't done anything yet. Oh, you love seeing those hopeful eyes in every bride. “I’m just waiting for my fiancé, he’s the one who recommends coming here and I have a great feeling that I will have a beautiful wedding because of you”
“And my team,” you added and finished her sentence, “I want to introduce you to my assistant, she will be taking care of every request you say during our discussion later”
“And I want to introduce you to my fiancé, Jaehyun,” she said with a big smile and walked towards his fiancé.
And just like that your ordinary day at the office became extraordinary. Because nothing is normal about Jung Jaehyun, nothing is normal about those dimpled smile that automatically makes your heart skip a beat.
“Baby, this is the wedding organizer” her smile has no hint of mock, she’s not even proud that she has a very handsome fiancé and obviously she doesn’t know who you are. She’s just happy that she’s marrying Jaehyun. That’s all. And in those eyes, you see that Jaehyun is in the right hands.
“Mhmm. Me, Johnny, and Ms. Y/n right here are dorm mates. So you’re talking to the best wedding organizer,” you snorted at what Jaehyun said.
“Thank you for that introduction Jung, now let’s talk about your wedding”
And so, you worked your magic to them the whole morning. Explaining things, showing stuff, asking them what they want. From the wedding reception, wedding dress appointments, and picking of cakes… she has no idea of what she wants. Good thing you do know what you’re doing and you planned everything smoothly after a few hours. And for hours and hours, you watched them smile at each other, lowkey flirted in front of you but you didn’t feel any jealousy, hurt, or regret.
When the exhausting meeting was finally done and finally you’re alone at your office, a soft knock brought you back to reality and a familiar voice was behind it. “Can I come in?” Jaehyun asks.
“Of course, it’s open” you watch him enter your office like he’s some kind of a ghost and made the room cold in an instant.
“I just want to say thank you for helping us out- thank goodness the world is small… Literally, the wedding will be a mess”
“Just doing my job Jae,” you smiled sweetly to him, “your fiancé is lovely-“
“I did love you Y/n. And I’m sorry for hurting you like that, I told you, you deserve better. I’m glad we both found our happiness” he flashed that dimpled smile again and thanked you one last time.
The little reunion ended with small smiles, nods here and there, and in just a few seconds Jaehyun is out from your office and quickly replaced by your assistant to give you your afternoon coffee. Awkward and curious, she placed the coffee in front of you. Obviously, she wanted to know your past with the groom. And when she finally dropped the question, you remembered everything, moments crashing and drowning you right this instance.
Eight years ago  
“Are you even trying, you’re no fun!”  
Your best friend shouts at you from the other side of the table, waiting for you to throw the ball, waiting for you to miss. It was just beer pong but you don’t know why the game was so fucking frustrating and no matter how hard you concentrate you can’t score. Maybe it’s because you’re all alone and you’re competing against your best friend and her boyfriend. Fuck that you thought, you don’t need a man.
“Fuck” you murmur and miss again. You watch your best friend’s boyfriend score another one and of course, you have to drink again. But just when you’re about to get the ball from drink, a stranger’s hand was quick to get the cup, remove the ball and drink the alcohol.
“Mind if I join and help you win?” He flashed you a dimpled smile that immediately made you smile back at him. You take back what you said earlier, maybe you do need someone.
“Come on! Let him in, maybe he’s a better competition” your best friend shouts once again. Oh, you’re very happy that you’re not going to the same college.
As you welcome the handsome stranger and gave him the honor of throwing the ball, you warned him first that your opponents can be very annoying but he doesn't seem to care and just let out a small laugh. Cocky you thought, but confidence looks sexy on him.
And finally. Fucking finally, your best friend had a taste of her own medicine.
“I’m Jaehyun by the way,” he was lowkey flirting with you and you’re not stupid to not notice. “Here, I’ll teach you how to throw” he put the ball in your palm and stood behind you, hands on your waist to keep you steady, arms raised together, and you swear his lips were so near at your nape that you got shivers whenever he talks. “let the ball bounce near a cup and it will land on one” he added. But how can you score if he’s making it hard for you? You did it anyways, threw the ball near a cup and he was right. It landed on the cup you wish to aim and finally, you’re starting to have fun.
The game went on and you and Jaehyun flirted, talked, and exchange deep glances the entire game but winning it at the same time. His one hand is always around your waist even if it's not necessary whenever he’s the one throwing the ball, and whenever the other team scores, he’s the one drinking the alcoholic beverage for you.
At the end of the game, you and Jaehyun won the golden prize which is very awkward when he showed it to you.
“All that frustration and competition for a condom?” you can’t believe that the prize is a single condom.
“We don’t have to use it, it can just be our trophy you know” he let out a small laugh and put the condom in his pocket, and changed the subject.
As the night went deeper, you and Jaehyun had your own little world in that corner at the kitchen with a beer in your hand while you talk about your interest from music to movies. It was pretty crowded but no one seems to care especially Jaehyun because he loves how incredibly close he is to you right now. Until a drunk person bumped Jaehyun and he accidentally spilled his beer on your blouse. Seems like the universe is making a way for you two to eventually hook up and use the condom.
“Shit-shit!” Jaehyun was panicking at the moment and he doesn’t know what to do other than remove his hoodie and cover you with it before anyone sees your see-through blouse and took you somewhere less crowded to help you clean up the mess he put you through.
In a stranger's room upstairs, he locked the door to let you change while he looks for something to dry your clothes with. Luckily, he saw a hairdryer and quickly plugged it in beside the bed and started drying your shirt.
You were conscious for some time, clinging to a stranger's blanket with nothing but your pants underneath it. You watch Jaehyun dry your bra, checking it from time to time if it's ready to go. And when it's finally dry, he hands it to you with an awkward smile but still managed to make your heart beat fast. “I’m really sorry,” he started, a quickly avoided his gaze from you again as you turn your back from him, put down the blanket, and wear your bra like there's no one with you.
“It was an accident, don’t beat yourself up,” you said, there’s no way he’s going to let this go you’re sure of it, so with all your bravery, you came closer to him while he's busy drying your blouse and kissed him on the cheek. “You've been saving me the whole night. You saved me from boredom and from losing and now, you're drying my clothes. So sweet of you,” you added and looked at him sweetly, resting your forehead on his and making the moment even more intense by putting down the blanket in front of him. Allowing him to see you with only wearing your bra and pants, inviting him to make this moment unforgettable for the two of you.
Of course, he's not stupid and did exactly what you had in mind. In one swift moved his lips are on your lips, hands on your shoulders to put your bra straps down, and you unclasped your bra and threw it on the floor before you started to kiss him more intensely.
Jaehyun kissed you exactly how you wanted to be kissed, with want and with lust. His breath and the sound of wet kisses sounded perfect as it surrounds the room. You felt him bite your neck then feel him smile against your skin when his intentions of turning you on even more is working.
Kisses became deeper, playful, and wet when he started to go down to your chest and started kissing the valley between your boobs. His big hands knead your right boob, while his left hand is placed on your waist. Oh when his tongue brushed on your nipple for the first time, you rolled your head back and arched your back as if you wanted him to do more and play more with your boobs.
And just like that the cold night became warm and you feel it getting warmer and warmer by every second and it’s all because of Jaehyun.
He flashed a dimpled smile at you when he saw that you're more than liking what he's doing to you and stopped to open the lampshade. The room was immediately softly illuminated which you thought is romantic even though everything that’s happening right now is totally unplanned.
"Your boobs have spit all over, wait let me get that for you" you were just about to tell him that it's fine but he was quick to remove his shirt and reveal his godlike body right before your eyes. “If you just want to kiss and touch the whole night, I’m fine with that but I am very horny right now that I got you covered with spit,” he said while wiping his spit from your boobs and chest using his shirt.  
If you’re perfectly honest, you’re nervous about what can happen in the next few minutes. But there’s no way in hell that you’re going to let this pass, it’s not every day a handsome man is eager to fuck you. You just have to suck it up, not tell him that you’re a virgin, perform and look like you know what you’re doing. "No, it's fine I'm horny too" and you proved it by kissing him again, cupping his face with both of your hands, and with all your strength you roll on top of him. "Wait here," you said as you push him back on the mattress when he tried to get a hold of you.
You went down from the bed to remove your pants and underwear, he did the same as quickly as he can and you think he's cute for being excited to fuck. You crawled in between his legs, sat nicely on top of him but the impatient guy sat up and met your lips again. One hand supporting his weight, one hand on your waist. "You're so fucking beautiful I'm having a hard time to breath for the last few minutes" he whispers so sexily while kissing your jaw, leaving his mark to remind you the next day about tonight.
For a minute, you felt shy because you've never been naked with someone in bed. But the way Jaehyun kisses you makes you trust him, the way he touches your body with care make you want him more. And again, those fucking lips just made you roll your hips against his hardening cock and it made you both moaned so good that he asked you to do it again. And so you did.
Letting his cock slide in between your folds is a new feeling for you. Not even grinding on your vibrator will give you such an amazing feeling. Grinding on Jaehyun's cock while his mouth plays with your boobs felt fucking good that your grip on his locks tightens but he doesn't care. But for someone untouched like you, you made sure you never forget the feeling whenever his tongue swirls while you roll your hips, how he bites your nipples whenever he feels you're slowing down, and the vibrations that share with you whenever he grunts a little too loud and you feel it all over your body.
Soon Jaehyun switched places with you, putting you underneath him to catch his breath and stop himself from cumming. He reached for your hand and hold it dearly, kissing your knuckles and the back of your hand. “Forgive me if I become rough tonight, I can promise an aftercare don’t worry,” he says and gave you one last kiss before he pulls away and gets the condom from the pocket of his discarded pants. Putting the protection in front of you to assure you, thank goodness to that condom you thought.
As soon as he crawls back in between your legs again, his hand moved around your body like he’s telling you he owns you, smiling in between kisses whenever he accidentally tickles you. Hands slipping in between your thighs and fingers brushed automatically on your very wet slit. You jolt because of the new feeling but careful not to show Jaehyun that this is your first time being finger fucked. So you closed your eyes to avoid his gaze but Jaehyun gave your ass a tight squeeze and put his thumb on your wet slit, admiring how wet he made you already which made you open your eyes again and moan his name deliciously.
“I like the sound of that,” he says, kissing your neck and down Jaehyun goes, kissing your body until he reaches your pussy to give you few licks before he fucks you.
The way he licked your wet folds made your toes curl and your legs spread even wider. Pushing his head away, crushing his head with your legs then spreading it wide again, and begged him but you’re not sure what for.  
“Jae- you eat pussy like a pro” or maybe you’re just telling that because it’s your first time being eaten out. That even the way he puts the right amount of force to stop your legs from closing whenever he flicks his tongue is perfect. And when he saw you relaxing and can handle the pleasure already, his hands cupped both of your boobs and pinched your nipples, making you moan his name loudly “Jae!-“ and arch your back as a sign that you’re almost there, and if he doesn’t stop soon you might cum now.
But of course, Jaehyun didn’t stop and made you cum using his tongue for the first time tonight. Your legs felt like jelly and you can even feel that your pussy is still sensitive. “Thought it’s going to be just a few licks?” you said weakly, wiping your pussy juices from his chin and planting a soft kiss on his lips as a thank you, but he doesn’t know that.
“Changed my mind, you taste good. I might even go for another round-“
And right before he goes down on you again, you stopped him and told him you’re still sensitive. Which thankfully he listened and kissed you instead of licking you. And when you’re finally good to go again, he holds you by your ankles, kiss your neck and touch your body for a few seconds before he finally lines his cock on your very wet slit. Sliding it up and down, teasing you and making you horny and even more aroused.  
When he finally pushed his cock in your hole, Jaehyun thought his dick will slide in smoothly because, one, he thought you’re not a virgin anymore and two, you’re dripping on the sheets but still he’s having a hard time pushing in. Then he saw your face, contorting like you’re in pain rather than seeing you furrow your brows, part your lips, and make beautiful sounds.
For you, it fucking hurts and you would rather suck it up than tell him you’re still a virgin and ruin the mood. But the man on top of you is not stupid and surprisingly he pulled out slowly and came closer to your body once again to face you, “I’m about to be your first time, am I right? You’re so tight and I’ve never encountered a hole like that ever since my first fuck”
Busted you thought. You thought of any more ways to get out of this situation but he looks like he’s okay with it. “Are you mad?” you asked shyly and avoiding his stare.
“No” he admitted, “Actually I’m turned on. But I’ll go slow and sorry if I hurt you at first. Want to try again?”
You nod oh eagerly to his question and finally, you can breathe and enjoy the moment. He gave you a few kisses before he continues and went back to lining his cock, he made you wrap your arms around his neck and asked you to spread your legs even wider. And when he pushed in again, there’s that good stretch you’ve been hearing so much about. The feeling of Jaehyun’s cock go slowly inside you was incredibly good even though he’s not fucking you raw right now.
“The condom is thin-“ he grunts and moaned a few times, “you’re so tight. And fuck you look hot. Does it feel good now?” he whispers and started to roll his hips once which made you both moan and let out sharp gasps.
He fucks you slow and deep until the sting from the stretch is replaced by pleasure. You rake his body with your nails, holding him on his nape, and grab a fistful of hair whenever he tries to give you a powerful thrust which you loved so you asked for more.
He sat on his knees and pull away from your body then immediately gave you a hard thrust, watching your boobs bounce with lidded eyes, kneading them whenever he wants to. In a matter of few minutes, his thrust became animalistic that your head is dangling on the edge of the bed, moaning and gasping sharply but the man above you kept on fucking you hard, savoring the condom and trying not to cum so soon. So whenever he’s on edge, he pulls out immediately and spreads kisses around your body, sucking your boobs until your nipples are swollen, playing with your slit until you’re cumming for the third time tonight using his fingers.
“Not yet, I want more time with you,” he says while kissing your neck and reaching for your hand to intertwine it with his.
“Jaehyun, I can’t take it anymore. Please cum already” you begged with ragged breaths.
“Fine, fine. Since you asked nicely, but promise me to give me your number after we fuck”
“I will if you make me cum using your dick” he was amused by your answer and effortlessly flipped you on your stomach and asked you to put your ass in the air. He kissed your shoulders first, making you feel safe before the grand finale. Hands on your ass while he slowly thrust in again and fuck, he does make your knees weak.
“You were just a virgin a few minutes ago, but now you’re begging huh, okay” he says before he gave you a hard thrust that made you land flat on your stomach but he was quick to lift your hips again and give you another hard thrust.
Thrust after thrust you feel the impact in your body and for sure your body will be sore the next day. You call his name over and over again but you’re not sure what you’re begging for because he is fucking you good. Hard but good. And when finally Jaehyun is on edge for the nth time tonight, he did not pull out and kept fucking you but this time he doubled his pace that you can only hear skin slapping and his beautiful moans.
“Fuck Jaehyun- I’m cumming again, don’t you dare fucking stop” you grip the sheets and arch your back more, taking every thrust Jaehyun gives you and shut your eyes close as you let go and cum for the fourth time tonight.
Thrust
Thrust
Thrust
He gave you three powerful thrusts before you both flop on the mattress and catch your breath together. Your bodies were warm and sweaty, the room smelled like sex but no one cares. You feel bad to the owner of this bed.
While you catch your breath and calm yourself down, Jaehyun busies himself with discarding the condom and looking for something to cover your exposed body before he makes a wrong decision like asking you for round two.
“Thanks” you said weakly when he covered you with the blanket.
“I hope you’re okay with me being your first” he says and lies beside you again, keeping you close to him.
“I’m more than okay with it” you kissed him on the lips like you’re keeping a souvenir, “I hate to ruin this moment that we shared but, we have to go back to the party” you watch him shook his head no and pretended to be asleep, “Mhmm. Come on, I’ll help you get dressed” you added.
To be perfectly honest Jaehyun wanted to stay with you for a few more minutes, he wanted to know more about you, he wanted to hold your hand just a little bit longer. “Stay with me” he asks of you, but you refused with a heavy heart. You exchanged cellphone numbers of course, but when you two got back to the party, hand in hand and back to flirting with each other, your friends are quick to get a hold of you. and the next thing you know you’re inside your friend’s car, on your way home and you couldn’t stop thinking about him.
On the next day, you woke up very sore and you couldn’t walk properly but the thought of what happened last night just makes you smile and all giggly. You waited for his text the whole day, checking your phone from time to time and hoping that whenever it beeps, Jaehyun’s name is on the screen but no.
You thought that waiting for him for a day is normal, maybe he got hungover and slept the whole day. But after a few days later, still you got no texts from him and that part is not normal anymore. You started to think that you’re just a one-time thing for him and you feel stupid for even thinking that Jaehyun can and eventually pursue you.
Everything that happened that night, should be forgotten and you should enjoy the remaining months of your summer before you finally move in to your college dorm. On top of that, you deleted his number and tried to forget the man who made you feel good in bed for the first time.
Now that you’re weeks away from officially being a college student, you decided to settle in your college dorm as early as now so you can have more time to know your dorm mates. Little did you know, that the world is incredibly small and you will end up being dorm mates with Jaehyun alongside his best friend Johnny who welcomed you with a big bear hug like you’ve known each other for years.
It’s not that you weren’t happy to see him when he opened the door for you, it’s just that... it was such an awkward moment because you’ve seen each other naked and... he didn’t call you back. Nonetheless, you pretended to know each other for the first time today, shake his hand and give him a hug. Which you didn’t want to end so soon.
“Hey, uhm… glad to see you settle in” he started and closed your door so Johnny would not hear whatever conversation you’re about to have.
“Yeah, thank you for welcoming me warmly. Johnny is sweet by the way” you said awkwardly while folding your clothes and putting them in your cabinet.
“Uh, about that. Uhm, can you uh-“
“Not tell him that something happened between us?” he nods slowly at what you said, “sure” you wanted to scoff so bad and throw a fit at him, but you didn’t want to ruin your move in day and just shrugged it off.
Starting that day, you tried your best not to be awkward with Jaehyun and really try your best to forget about the sex. The sex that felt good, the sex that can make your toes curl by just merely thinking about it. Although you had a hard time because whenever you touch yourself at night, you remember everything that happened between you two and you end up fantasizing about fucking Jaehyun again. But now that you’re living with him and you see him every day, it's not just about the sex now.
During the summer you were convinced that Jaehyun is a guy who had sex with you and left you hanging. But seeing him every day and knowing him even more by living together, the truth about Jaehyun slapped you so hard that you even liked him even more now. He is a warm person, whose heart is full of care and compassion, or maybe even more than that.
Eventually, you did forget about the sex and your little crush on Jaehyun. Thank goodness, you thought. You couldn’t have done it without a few hookups during your freshman year. And when everything is all nice and pleasant again between you and Jaehyun, you became good friends and started to look after each other.
You were like family in that small dorm during your starting years together. The two giant knows how to cook so a good meal is never a problem, you have study sessions whenever it’s needed and whenever someone is going through something, you were there for each other.
It was great and comforting because you do everything together. But not until Jaehyun realized that he’s not immune to your charms anymore and now he’s falling for you. Hard.
Over the years of living together, Jaehyun saw your true colors. Now he knows you’re more than just a hookup. You were a gem that he found in a stranger’s party and he was such a fool for not calling you back during the summer. It’s true what they say that regrets are always at the end. Now he can only admire you and love you in ways where he can’t ruin this amazing friendship that you have.
Jaehyun endured every heartbreak whenever he sees you with another man or hearing you moan from the other side of the room whenever you and your boyfriend have sex. And when that jerk broke your heart, his broke two times than yours because he can’t do anything to ease your pain, make you realize your true worth and help you move on.
“You don’t need that guy,” Jaehyun says as he pulls you for a hug while Johnny massages your toes. The two giants were a good support system, not to mention they really want to beat your ex’s butt but you told them ‘thanks but, no don’t do that’. And while you’re crying in Jaehyun’s arms, staining his hoodie with your tears, he promised to himself that he will never hurt you or make you cry.
Now that he’s frustrated and mad at himself because he can’t help you, he decided to help himself instead. He watched on the sides and used different girls to make him forget about you, which is hardly impossible by now because even the little things you do make him crazy. Like whenever you ask him to eat dinner with you when Johnny is out for work, or whenever you take care of him when he goes home batshit drunk and can’t even stand up straight.
For Jaehyun, his college years were all about yearning. Yearning for you, your attention, your touch, and your love. But even though you’re now single and have already moved on from your ex, he still can’t confess his feelings for you because he believes that you deserve someone better than him. Jaehyun knew he hurt you already, and he will not forgive himself if he does it again.  
Senior year
In a middle of a busy cafeteria, you, Johnny, and Jaehyun are thinking of ways how to earn money for your dorm rent. This semester made you guys bring out a lot of cash because of books and some of your rent money was needed to sacrifice for education. But now that you guys are a month late with your rent, you have no idea where to get cash knowing all too well that your parents won’t chip in.
“I could sell some of my clothes” Jaehyun suggested while drinking his coffee.
“Dude your clothes are all black, no one would ever buy those” Johnny bites back just to annoy his friend. “Though girls will buy it because it’s from you-“
“Stop it with your nonsense John”
“Or! You can sell some of your nudes, I already know a lot of buyers” Johnny added with an annoying smile.
“Or you two can just fuck each other because you’re the hottest guys on campus but your asses are broke” you tease them further but you have no idea that you just gave out the solution to all your problems. “What?” you asked them as they both smile at you, shy for no reason, and eyeing each other like they’re having a secret conversation using their eyes.
Johnny clears his throat before he starts, “You just suggested to make porn… and porn is good money. A few students do it these days” he clears his throat again before he continues, “We know because we watch porn-“
“Okay, I don’t need to know that part. What are you saying? Are you suggesting we make porn?” you said, eyes big as you look at them.  
“You suggested it. Not us. But yeah. It’s good money Y/n” Johnny once again explained.
“Well, okay. I’ll hold the camera while you two fuck. How do we do this?” you avoid their eyes as your body heats the more you talk.
“Nuh-uh, I’m not fucking Johnny” Jaehyun announces.
“Nope. Me too I’m not fucking Jaehyun, you choose Y/n. No hard feelings, but consider the size” he winks but you know that he’s just joking.
Good thing the awkward conversation was cut when your alarm went off and you have to go to your next class. You gather your stuff and told them to think of better ways to earn money because there’s no way you’re having sex with any of them. Especially not with Jaehyun.
The idea of making money through porn crosses your mind every five minutes and you can’t concentrate with your class. Plus, your landlord kept on sending messages reminding you that in three days, you’re going to be two months late with the rent. But still, whenever you imagine having sex with any of them, it gives you great goosebumps and you can’t handle the awkwardness anymore.
After your class, you were spacing out and still weighing things over regarding the porn making, and unexpectedly, one of your friends brought up ‘amateur porn’ and you’ve never been so nervous in your life. She was talking about how she and her boyfriend went live for a good twenty minutes and they made loads of cash, “and guess what, it’s all for fun! We were really just fooling around but apparently, people do love those kinds of stuff and they pay good money”
Your mouth almost fell when she mentioned the cash they earned for only twenty minutes. And in that twenty minutes, you can cover one month's rent pay already. You just have to cum in front of thousands of people. So with a mind blinded by the possibility of earning too much cash, you said yes to the idea of making porn. The only question is, with whom?
Johnny and Jaehyun stood in front of you as they wait for your answer after telling them what your friend told you about making porn. Of course you picked Jaehyun. Not because you miss him, and not because you have history, but because you don’t want to be awkward with Johnny. While Jaehyun on the other hand is feeling proud and hopeful behind that poker face of his, he thought that you chose him because you already know what’s in store for you if you fuck with him again and of course he thought that maybe you miss him.
“Johnny doesn’t really need to hold the camera for us right? We can just place it, and secure it somewhere” you added and watch Jaehyun agree without looking at you.
“You two have the place tomorrow night then. M-make sure you raise the quota and cover three months of payment... for safety” Johnny says to Jaehyun and you with a smile that says, ‘thank goodness I didn’t have to watch you both fuck’.
Before you sleep tonight, unexpectedly Jaehyun paid you a visit. And there’s that nervous feeling again, you feel like you’re back in your freshman days when you don’t know what to do whenever you see Jaehyun and you just have to pretend that nothing is bothering you.
Breathing in and out, you opened the door quickly and went back to your bed and under the covers to cover your exposed legs. Little did you know that Jaehyun already saw that you’re not wearing anything besides your lacy panties and an oversized shirt.
“Your ears are red,” you teased him.
“Well next time you should wear pajamas instead of your underwear to sleep” he winked and placed the mask that you’re going to be using tomorrow and sat on the edge of your bed.  
“What are you? A stranger? You’re so far, come here” you invited him under your sheets and lie in bed face to face like nothings bothering you two. You put your hand above his head and feel his soft locks, careful not to grip so hard and hurt the man you used to have feelings for.
This is why Jaehyun can’t move on from you. You always make him feel like he’s your favorite person in the world.
“Are you going to leave me hanging again after we have sex tomorrow?” You confronted him.
“That’s impossible now, we live together” he giggles and catches your hand so he could hold it.
“Just promise me after the sex tomorrow we’ll still be friends” you felt his grip loosen up like he became hopeless like he didn’t like what you just said.
“I was actually going to say that I want us to try again. Get things right this time”
And in that very moment, your world stopped and your body feels hot, suddenly you’re sweating and your heart is beating faster. To be honest you don’t know what to say.
Then,
“Kidding. I’m kidding. Just making you laugh before you sleep, and y-yeah. I promise nothing will change between us, cross my heart” he got up from your bed, turned off the lights and turned on your lampshade. “Sleep well okay?”
And just like that, he left again. You don’t know if you were relieved that it was only a joke or your heart broke because deep inside, you’re waiting for him to tell you that ever since Freshman year. Nonetheless, you do what you do best. Sleep it off and pretend nothing happened.
On the next day, you were at the kitchen preparing breakfast and spacing out while you flip pancakes. Most of them got burnt and you blame Jaehyun for that.
“I told you to sleep, didn’t I?”
There he goes again, startling you and flashing a very handsome smile at you like you’re not about to do something stupid later. “Johnny went to work early and took an overtime tonight just so you won’t get shy” he hands you a glass of water, figured you might need one because you looked so tensed.
“We can always text him when we're done” you added, he nods. And there’s the awkward silence again.
You finish your breakfast in one go, not even looking at Jaehyun. Usually, during breakfast, you talk mostly about your plans within the day but given the situation right now, obviously, you don’t want to know his plans because that includes you. Good thing the day went on normally. You cleaned the living room, he cleaned the kitchen, you cleaned your room, he cleaned his. You saw him changing his bedsheets and you think that’s a sweet gesture, you wanted to tease him but that won’t help you with your nervousness so you just smiled at him when he caught you looking.
When it’s finally afternoon and you’re going to fuck live in a few minutes, you were surprised at what he did to his room just so you won’t get nervous anymore. The golden ray of afternoon light was perfect and helped you calm in no time, Jaehyun lit some scented candles and lowered the thermostat of his air conditioning so you won’t get cold.
“Thought I should make this special- not that I’m saying our first wasn’t “ he rambles and scratches his head, ears turning red and now you can see that he’s nervous too. “But come on, I want to do right for you” he caresses your shoulders and nods his head as a signal that you two needed to start.
The mood was nothing like your first, there was no sexual tension or any sign of desire to fuck each other. In other words, he looked like he’s just doing this for the dorm rent and you are too. That’s why maybe stripping in front of Jaehyun while your back is against him was easier than you thought. But you didn’t know that the man was craving for you. He wanted to be the one removing your clothes while his lips roam on your neck, make you feel good and wanted just before the live starts. He wanted to do that.
“Remember your promise okay?” You put on your mask and Jaehyun did too. He was still fully clothed and while you’re lying in his bed comfortably, watching him strip in front of you but not for you. The camera is right above your head so the viewers can imagine that they are the ones having sex with Jaehyun. If that won't give you a lot of money then you don’t know what will.
Jaehyun was a natural, you wanted to tell him that he does look like a pornstar but you’re not allowed to talk. When he finally crawled on the bed, straight between your legs and spread them according to his want, a shiver went straight to your spine and immediately made you wet. He shamelessly kissed your inner thighs first and went all the way up until he reaches your lips.
Finally. You both thought.
But his kisses were different and you wonder why. You feel like you’re not kissing Jaehyun because you know how his kiss can affect you, although his touch was still the same. He can still make you jolt and part your lips with just using his fingers and a few teasing here and there. And when he finally put his cock inside you, that’s the part where you finally believe that Jaehyun is indeed the one in bed with you right now. You will never forget how that cock feels inside you, “I miss you” he whispered very softly, hoping that the viewers did not hear it.
Time flies so fast that the live will end in ten minutes now and Jaehyun has been fucking you deep and slow like he’s savoring the feeling again. When you heard him grunt and moan, that made your toes curl and clench accidentally around him. Making him groan a little louder and fuck you a bit faster. You moaned so loud just so he knows you’re very much close to your high, and in just a few minutes you both cum together and the next thing you know he’s pulling out and letting his cum land on top of your pussy lips for the viewer’s pleasure.
Fuck you wish he didn’t pull out.
He grabbed his phone from above you and turned the damn timer off because you may not know, but the timer was screaming at him that his time with you is over. You removed your mask and he removed his too. And there you saw tears in his eyes, or maybe those are sweat? Nonetheless, you asked him what’s wrong and made him look at you. But instead of answering your question, he kissed you. Hands on both sides and cupping your face as he kisses you deeper.
And there’s that kiss you’ve been waiting for. The kiss that you’ve been wanting to experience again for years and years. You shouldn’t be happy, but you’re actually genuinely happy that your rent pay is late and you get to do this again with Jaehyun.
“I missed you too” finally you said it.
He smiled so sweetly to you and went back to the kiss, spreading your legs again, checking your slit if you’re still wet. And without further ado, he thrust in. Slowly again, but this time he’s proving a point. Like he’s telling you something. And now that you can see his face, you can’t help but feel excited and the butterflies in your stomach are very much excited too that you were smiling in between kisses.
“Ride me” he says, and effortlessly he trades places with you. Holding you on your back, lips still locked like you’re not planning to stop any time soon. And for your own pleasure, you guided his hands and made him knead your boobs. He did more than kneading, Jaehyun sucked your nipples and pinched them to hear you moan.
“A lot has changed Jae” you said, pushing him down to the mattress and intertwined your fingers with his, kissed them and placed them on your hips. You started rolling your hips without a warning, making the man underneath you close his eyes and part his lips. There are many things you wanted to do with him now that you had the privilege to ride him, but you decided to go hard because this might be the last time you’re going to fuck Jaehyun again.
You ride him like you didn’t have sex for years. Skin slapping from rolling your hips faster than he expected, letting your boobs bounce in front of him and letting him touch them whenever he wants to. “It’s hard to pull out when you’re on top, want to switch places?” He was struggling to talk, obviously he’s trying so hard not to cum yet but you’re good at what you’re doing.
“Not tonight” and that promise just made Jaehyun moan deliciously like he’s excited to cum now just so he can experience cumming inside you.
“Y-yeah. That’s right Y/n fuck me. Oh you fuck me so good! Shit- why did I ever let you go. Fuck”
The thing is, you love seeing him all fucked up and love hearing him praise the way you fuck him... but he chose the wrong words. And those words went straight to your heart. The words ‘Why did I ever let you go?’ repeated over and over again while you ride so fast that you’re overstimulating him already. He was begging for you to stop but it was too late when you heard him.
When you finally stopped, you see his cum dripping from your pussy even though you’re not yet removing his cock from you. You catch your breath for a second and came closer to Jaehyun. Good thing he has enough strength to hug you and roll you to the mattress so he could have the honor to pull his cock out.
“You’re right a lot has changed,” he says because his silly crush on you grew and grew and now he’s completely in love with you. “Let’s not shower together, I’m afraid I’ll lure you to have shower sex with me”
“And what’s so wrong about that” you bite back.
“Oh so you’re confident now huh,” he kissed you once again, and shit you never want him to leave your lips.
But every good thing comes to an end. You went back to your room and showered separately, as planned and when you went to the living room, he was all cleaned up and looking so fresh. He was wearing his glasses, hair almost covering his eyes, he looked cozy in his oversized shirt and his favorite plaid pajamas. “Come here,” He pats the seat next to him, signaling you to come watch Netflix with him. Surprisingly, his arms wrapped around you and kept you close to him, subtly smelling your shampoo. He giggled at the thought of imagining you taking a shower while smiling because the sex was fucking awesome.
He played a movie and watched it with you just so he can still keep you close to him. Not even halfway through the movie, he caught you sleeping soundly on his lap and slowly covered your exposed legs with the blanket on the couch. He pats and pats your head until his attention was no longer in the movie that he’s watching but his mind lingers to what happened earlier and eventually fell asleep beside you too.
It was very late when Johnny went home and caught you two all snuggled up on the couch, snoring and slept through to what you were watching. He had a hunch that you two had a great time, smiled and turned off the TV, and wished you both a good night's sleep.
“I have bad news” Johnny announces as you and Jaehyun wake up together on the couch, all smiles and in an incredibly good mood but Johnny was quick to ruin that. “The money you earned from yesterday’s live was not enough”
You don’t know why Jaehyun was still smiling at you even though what Johnny just told you completely ruined your day already. “That’s not bad news, right?” He whispers to you and gave you a look. “I’m okay with doing it again until we cover everything” Jaehyun says to Johnny while you three sit in front of each other, drinking your coffees.
“I’ll work double shifts at the radio station- are you fine with doing it again Y/n?” Johnny asks, and for a second there you feel like you’re in the hot seat.
“Y-yeah. I’m okay with it” you scratch your nape and awkwardly sip your coffee, “it’s easy money, I think if we do more lives we can cover three months pay”
“More lives it is. Don’t worry John, I’ll take other slots at the radio station too for groceries and stuff” Jaehyun added.
The live fucking continues and so is fooling around with Jaehyun, having better sex every after going live and whenever Johnny is not around. It’s like playing with fire, but you don’t exactly know if what you’re doing is wrong or right because you’re both single, so why are you guys hiding? You don’t get it, but you just go with the flow, enjoy what’s happening and hope for the best.
Every sex you have grown more and more intense to the point that your beds are moving and that gives you better reviews in live fucking. Not to mention the money is better now and you’re saving up faster than expected. But whenever the camera is off and you’re having sex without an audience, you guys fuck like you’re together and you love each other.
Sweet love bites here and there, sincere praises and longer kisses. For Jaehyun he feels like he’s having a dream because he gets to do the things he wanted to do with you. Remove your clothes while kissing you, whisper the things he has been holding back to say for years, and make you feel loved and important.
And just like the sex, your cuddling session became even warmer and sweeter. Cuddling after you take a shower has always been your thing, he visits you in your room with damped hair and you help him dry his hair, Netflix and chill, or order in and have a great meal together.
Days went by and you’re getting used to this sweet Jaehyun and you well know that’s dangerous. But you love every dangerous thing about Jaehyun. The following days grew extremely sweet and intimate. You sleep in his room every night and basically do everything together from now on. The only time you two were apart is during class hours but after that, Jaehyun is right outside your classroom waiting for you.
“What are you doing?” you giggle and try to finish the book you’re reading in bed when Jaehyun suddenly entered your room, crawled on your bed, and went in between your legs. Removing your glasses for safety, inviting you to fuck while Jaehyun nibs your ear and caress your legs. Oh his kisses always make your head turn and ask for more.
“Johnny is not around and I just took a shower, hmm? What do you say?” He uses that cute tone that can always make you stop what you’re doing and say yes to him. Forget the book, you can finish it later.
Removing your shorts and underwear while he continuously kisses you, smiling and giggling while he whispers ‘you always look pretty’ before he removes your shirt and exposes your boobs to him. You tried getting up and help him remove his clothes, but he stopped you and kissed you down on the mattress. “Nu-uh. Stay there I’ll treat you good tonight” he winked and proceeds to remove his clothes in between your spread legs, your hands roam freely in his well sculpted and fucking beautiful body.
Then he reached for your phone and took a nice picture while you two are kissing. The sound of the camera clicking made your eyes open, “send me this picture later. So I can stop missing you” you smiled and nod, then Jaehyun took one too many pictures so he could focus on you again. When he’s finally contented with all the pictures he got, he finally thrust in deep and slow while his mouth is sucking one of your nipples and he looks incredibly handsome.
This time, it’s you who grabbed your phone and took some pictures of him sucking your boobs and making you feel good, taking some pictures of his cock inside your pussy while he thrusts. Jaehyun had the idea of taking a video while you two fuck but this time, it’s for his and your eyes only. He took the phone from you and recorded how he fucks you good, and did not miss the part where you part your lips and moan.
“Jaehyun I’m almost there” you moan out, fingerings raking his nape or on his beautiful body. He puts the camera on the bedside table with a perfect angle of him fucking you, without masks or any cover. He intertwines his fingers with yours before he fucks you hard and fast. The camera that’s recording everything was completely forgotten and Jaehyun focused on making you feel good, making you cum at least two times using his dick and his fingers.
After your second high you were so exhausted that you were breathing heavily and Jaehyun is helping you to calm down while kissing your boobs and sucking them playfully. Even your cute moments like this was caught on camera and Jaehyun was more than happy about it.
“You okay? Want to cum for the third time?” He reached for your phone, stop the recording and went back in between your legs again and kiss you wherever he wants. You didn’t answer him ‘yes’ because to be completely honest you were still exhausted and he understood you well. For a good quiet minutes he was just staring at you, flashing his dimples, raking his fluffy hair and biting his lips at the same time. The silence felt good and not the usual awkward silence you have.
“The next live that we will be doing is going to be our last. And our dorm rent will be settled in no time” he started.
“And?”
“I’ll miss you”
Ouch. You wish he kept the quietness and peace instead. Just as you thought that life will now let you be with Jaehyun peacefully, here comes the heartbreak again. Truth is Jaehyun is still scared and very much afraid to hurt you that’s why he just wanted to fix himself before he could date you officially. He didn’t want to pursue his feeling with you just because you did porn together and fucked live, no you deserve better than that.
He loves you. So much, but he’s not ready yet.
You wanted to shout at him and asked him what else does he want from you? He is so good at making you feel like you’re always not enough for him and that makes your mind go crazy. He did it again. He left you hanging again when you’ve completely fallen in love with him. Turns out he’s not willing and ready to catch you. But as usual, you do what you do best. Shrugged it off and continue to live like it’s not bothering you.  
The live fucking and porn making stopped for a while because you and Jaehyun have final exams. And the awkwardness between you and Jaehyun came back in no time, nonetheless, it was a good week to have a breather and to let yourself think straight. But still, you can’t help but think about everything and miss Jaehyun.
“Are you on your way home?” Johnny asks Jaehyun through the phone.
“Yeah, just buying us dinner”  
“Good. Y/n is on her period”
“Am I suppose to be happy because I didn’t get her pregnant?” He chuckled proudly and having no clue what Johnny was saying.
“Take care of her she has period cramps dumb ass!“
“Oh right- right… sorry. Okay, yeah”
When Jaehyun arrived with the stuff that Johnny told him to buy for you and the dinner Jaehyun bought you, you were twisting in hurt inside your room grunting and very vocal about the pain while you hug the hot compress Johnny left you when Jaehyun entered your room.
“Ah- fuck it hurts” you groan and curl yourself, pressing that hot compress more on your lower abdomen and endure your period cramps. Jaehyun is just so sweet to stay beside you and rub your back while he watches you suffer.
“I want to help. Do you need anything other than that hot compress?” He was concerned and willing to make you feel better.
“Nothing I’m fine. You’re so sweet” you said in a little irritated tone but you’re not actually irritated with him. He scrolls through his phone with one hand, while the other is rubbing and caressing your back to give you comfort.
“Google says sex is good when-“
“I’m not having period sex with you, Jaehyun” but you do want him to touch you. Stupid hormones. Stupid period. It just makes you crave for him even more, desperate for even a kiss, or even just with his body closer to you.
“Are you horny?” He asks without shame, smiling at you and hoping that you say yes.
“I am” you admitted
“Just say yes, I got you” he was like seducing you, luring you to sin with him tonight while you bleed. And you like it.
“Okay” you answered softly. Shy but he knew you’re not that type anymore.
Jaehyun scoop over and went under the covers with you. Giving you that warmth that you need, making your body warm and comfortable, and basically giving everything you want. He intertwines his fingers with you, kissed your knuckles, and then your lips. Softly. Slowly. It’s every girl’s dream kiss. And just like his kiss, his hand creeps under the covers, all the way down until he reaches your thighs and spread one leg to gain access to your hole.
“W-wait. Let me just remove the tampon” shyly you inform him and discarded it quickly under the covers and throw it into the trash bin. Going back to the comfort that Jaeyun is giving you, his hand went back in between your legs and tease your clothed slit the moment you’re back under the covers. Smiling so handsomely and innocently while he lies beside you like he’s not doing something lustful under the covers.
“Do you think this will work-“ and just before you finish your question, Jaehyun ran a finger on your very wet slit which turned him on immediately. He flicked his finger, drawing small circles in your nub and listening to you moan while your grip on the sheets tightens and try your best not to close your legs.
“Do you like this?” his lips were very close to your neck and the way he talks to you was so sultry that even his words can make you moan.
“Mhmm. F-fuck Jae, my clit is sensitive” but your legs say others wise because you spread them even more under the covers and your hips voluntarily move to meet his fingers. When he felt your legs shake and hear your moans become higher than usual, he figured you were close, went on top of you and started to hump your thigh while his hand is inside your now ruined panties reaching deep in your hole making you feel good and over sensitive. Jaehyun grunted so loud and moaned deliciously beside your ear, moving his hips like how he fucks you and you feel his hard cock poke your thigh from the inside of his pants. Soon, Jaehyun came inside his pants and did not care about being embarrassed.
While you were coming down from your high, the man on top of you kept kissing you like you’re all that matters to him. Even though you well know that you’re just fooling yourself.
The night ended with Jaehyun sleeping beside you and further taking care of you after you both cleanup. But you woke up the next day without him beside you and thankfully, Johnny came out of nowhere to rescue you from your ugly thoughts. He came into your room with a cup of coffee and some bread for you, smiling like he has no problems in life and to be honest, you love how he’s always like this.
Since both of you don’t have classes today, you went to the groceries with Johnny and had a nice dinner at a fast food he loves. It felt great. It felt great to be with a guy who’s not Jaehyun. The man always keeps you on your toes and you feel like your head is always in the clouds whenever you’re with him but Johnny, he keeps you grounded.
“Shoot. The landlord is really testing me- he wants the money tonight or else they have to kick us out tomorrow. Fuck!” He says typing aggressively on his phone, telling Jaehyun immediately.
“Were not due until next week why are they doing this to us. We have no choice but to go live then” you said calmly, unbothered as much as possible because you just want this to be over now and move on from Jaehyun.
“You can't. You have your period and Jaehyun is not available- fuck why is he not picking up”
“There are other ways to make a guy cum Johnny. I’m sure you know that” you chuckle and shook your head in disbelief.
“Still, Jaehyun is not answering” he gave up and put down his phone.
“Well you’re available. I just want this to be over Johnny” clearly he didn’t expect you to suggest such a thing. You continue to eat your food in silence and so is the man in front of you. Obviously, he was bothered with what you suggested but it appears that he has no choice. You watch him fidget on his phone, maybe he’s not yet done contacting Jaehyun and still hoping that his friend will end up last minute but...
“Okay” he let a sigh of relief, “I texted Jaehyun that well do it but we're not going to uhm- uh, fuck. Blow job then? No more, no less? A bit of kissing maybe. Tell me what do you want? I’ll be able to do this comfortably if I know that you like what I’m doing to you”
“Hmm. Okay, let’s start by... be gentle with me. You’re a big guy and you know... what I mean”
“I may be big physically but I’m warm on the inside, being gentle is not a problem” he smiles and pour you a glass of water before he asks for the bill. “What else?” he added.
“Touch me, don’t hesitate. If you feel like my jaw needs rest then you can tell me to stop” he nods and told you he will surely not forget about that.
The conversation went on until you reached home and get ready for the live. Unlike Jaehyun who made you feel so nervous the day you had your first live with him, Johnny makes you feel calm and comfortable the whole time.
Now that you’re in front of Johnny, half naked with only your panties and your mask on, everything happened perfectly. It wasn’t perfect but it wasn’t awkward too, and quite frankly you had fun with Johnny. Even though the audience noticed that you’re not with Jaehyun right now, they can’t help but love Johnny’s hot body too and the way he fuck your face gently in front of the camera. Hands cupping both sides of your face as he thrust his long, hard and veiny cock in your mouth. Smiling through the pleasure whenever you purposely swirl your tongue and bob your head aggressively.
After the cum-filled and messy live with Johnny, you wired the money to your landlord immediately and secure the rent for good until the three of you graduates. Now you and Johnny can breathe normally after cleaning up and enjoy the warmth of your bed. “Do you like Jaehyun?” He blurted out, trying not to look at your exposed boobs but you roll your body and face the ceiling and so his efforts went to waste.
“Yeah but I don’t think he likes me enough. Y-you know what I mean” he shook his head to tell you he has no idea about Jaehyun’s intentions with you.
“Just have patience with him if you like him, after all, you’re the only girl that can do this to him”
“Do what?” you ask with eagerness.
“Did you really think that I won't notice you two fucking behind my back?” You laughed at what he said and laughed your shyness away, “but it’s alright. I figured maybe you like each other so I didn’t dare stop you two”
The giggling and laughing with Johnny under the soft light of your lampshade continued until you passed out and Johnny was the one who helped you get dressed. And on the same night, Jaehyun heard and saw you and Johnny laugh over a half closed door. Seeing your bodies close to each other made his blood boil and became jealous in no time. That’s why on the next day, Jaehyun was expressing his anger while you three are gathered in the kitchen. He’s not saying a word, but he kept on closing the cabinets a little too rough while he prepares his meal. Then it hit you, he’s jealous.
You confronted him and went to his room, closed and locked the door so Johnny won't hear the unpleasant conversation you’re about to have with Jaehyun. “Don’t be angry with Johnny, I’m the one who suggested it-“
“Like that’s going to make me feel better Y/n. Get out, you’re wasting your time” he turned his back and proceeds to fix his bed.
“It’s not like we cheated Jae. Were not together” you blurted as calm as possible. Little did you know that you just triggered something in him that makes him want to punch a wall and pour his anger out but he can’t. At least not in front of you. So instead, he shouted at you. So loud that you got scared for a second there.
“You know, I’m always afraid to hurt you but you! You don’t care if you hurt me!”
“Don’t act as if you love me, Jae. You never did. You never even tried!” You shouted back and walked away towards his door, banging it and walked straight to your room with tears in your eyes.
The fight was short but unforgettable.
Later that day, Jaehyun got worried when you didn’t eat lunch and dinner and your door was still locked and he can hear you crying from the other side. He kept on knocking at your door until you got annoyed and unlocked it but you covered yourself with your thick sheets.
“Come on why are you crying? Don’t cry over a stupid guy like me you don’t deserve it. I’m sorry” you feel his embrace and rub your back so you know that he’s sincere. And finally, you removed the sheets but still, you don’t want to look him in the eye.
You have a lot of questions for Jaehyun, and you think now is the perfect time to cry it all out and let him know what he’s doing to you. Why he didn’t text you back the night after you fuck for the first time, why he never ask you out when he promised he would, why he’s jealous all of a sudden.
FLASHBACK (In the middle of junior year)
It was very late already and some crazy person is ringing your doorbell nonstop. This couldn’t be Jaehyun or Johnny obviously they don’t need to ring the doorbell because they live here and they know the code. That’s why you were surprised that Jaehyun is the one ringing it and turns out he is batshit drunk and can’t even remember the code. “Where is Johnny when you need him” you murmur, “Jae, help yourself too. I can’t carry you all the way up to the fourth floor,” you said sternly to the handsome guy clinging on to you, breath smells like alcohol, eyes lidded but can still appreciate your beautiful face.
When you finally carried him successfully back to your place, without any hesitation he puked on your sleepwear and smiled so sweetly at you like he did nothing wrong. You wanted to slap him and wake him from his drunken state but Jaehyun was quick with his hands and unbutton your sleepwear and used it to wipe the small amount of puke on the floor.
You cover yourself with your arms and walked straight to your room and get a clean shirt before you take care of Jaehyun. He was murmuring “sorry” as he sees you walk away from him and weakly sit on the floor with dirty clothes and hope that you will come back to him.
When he sees you all dressed up again with a damped cloth on your hand, he smiled and spread his arms like he’s about to give you a hug. “Why are you acting cute- here hold this while I remove your socks” you hand him the damped cloth and proceed to remove his dirty socks and throw it with your dirty sleepwear. He looks at you lovingly as you wipe his face with the utmost care, looking at your lips and thinking about kissing it but no. He may be drunk but he won’t do that to you.
“Go on a date with me,” he says while you continue to wipe his face and help him take off his hoodie. You giggle and boops his nose before you stand and help him to get on his feet, “try asking me again when you’re sober” you opened his room door and told him to don’t forget to change his pants and greet him good night.
But after a few minutes, you’re all tucked in bed and half asleep already when you feel a pair of arms cage you. You can still smell his breath and figured maybe Jaehyun is clingy like this whenever he’s really drunk, which rarely happens.
“It's so sweet, knowing that you love me. Though we don't need to say it to each other, sweet. Knowing that I love you, and running my fingers through your hair. It's so sweet” he sings a few lines from Sweet by Cigarettes After Sex and smells your hair until his breath tickles your nape.
Sweet. He’s not only clingy while he’s drunk, but he’s sweet too. “I think I like you more when you’re rarely this drunk” you turn your body and faced him. Seeing Jaehyun with sleepy eyes, lips curved in a weak smile, but arms conscious enough to keep you near him.
“Then I’ll get drunk every day if that makes you love me”
But on the next day, he just thanked you for taking care of him and forgot about the date. And on the next few days and following weeks, you hear him fuck different girls and have one night stands every now and then.
BACK TO PRESENT TIME SENIOR YEAR
“I keep on hurting you I’m sorry. Don’t cry, please. I hate that I’m hurting you. This is the reason why I can’t pursue my feelings for you. I’m a mess and I’m not ready”
And just as you thought that this day couldn’t get any worse. It just did. You look at Jaehyun as he tells you the truth and admits his true feelings with you. How he fell in love with you but chose not to pursue his feelings because he’s not ready and you deserve better. And from there you stopped listening to him and told him to leave you alone. Jaehyun was speechless and hopeless, he wanted to explain and express his long bottled feelings for you but you don’t want to.
All this time you thought that it’s you who’s lacking that’s why he can’t even try and ask you out. But now that you know the truth and he would rather make you feel small than swallow his pride and try to make things work with you, well you just can’t be around him anymore.
Graduation is approaching near and your dorm has been quiet ever since you finished paying the rent and Jaehyun got mad because of what you and Johnny did. You look at the quiet place while you eat your instant noodle and reminisce the good days you spent with the two giants who made your college years unforgettable and happy. Actually, they even made your life easier.
Days become even more lonely now that Jaehyun and Johnny became busy with their last requirements and you’ve been alone for a few days now. You wake up without the two boys, go to class or run some errands, they go home but you’re not home, and by the time you arrive home they have shifts to the radio station again.
Today is your birthday and you spend it with some of your classmates which are all sweet and you treat them to dinner. Johnny left a bouquet of flowers on your bed before he left for work, together with a sweet happy birthday card. And Jaehyun… well, let’s just say that maybe he forgot about it because being a graduating student makes you busy.
While you were having a nice dream of Jaehyun singing a happy birthday song to you with a small cupcake in his hand, in reality, he woke you up by patting your head and a kiss on your forehead, whispering ‘I’m sorry’ and kissing your face until you’re awake and what’s happening right now is finally registering in your mind. You wrapped your arms around him and decided to forgive him for being stupid and accept his apology. “Is this for me?” you point at the chocolate cake on the bedside drawer a blew the candle, making your room dark and only the soft light from your window lights up your room.
“What did you wish for” he came closer to you and rests his forehead on yours. Oh you missed his presence, but all you feel right now is the heartbreak and remember what happened a few weeks ago.
“You, Jaehyun” you whisper and closed your eyes, not caring if there are tears in your eyes. You’re not afraid to show him that you ache for him.
“I told you, I can’t-“ you didn’t want to hurt yourself further and listen to those hurtful words so you kissed him and pulled him on top of you.
Everything happened so fast and naturally. You removed your shorts, he was quick to spread your legs and free his hardening cock. Not even bothering to reach for a condom, he fucked you in the dark and whispered “I’m sorry” over and over again that it hurts your ear and your heart so you put your thumb in his mouth and let him suck it good while his thrust was slowly picking up the pace and you hear skin slapping surrounds your room
“Jaehyun-“ you moan his name when you felt that familiar feeling of being on edge but you’re not yet ready to let go. You’re not yet ready to let him go. So you tried with all your might to clench and stop yourself from cumming but what you’re doing to Jaehyun just makes him want to fuck you more.
And so he did.
He covered your mouth not because he didn’t want to let Johnny know that you’re fucking but because he never wants to hear your beautiful moans again. He closed his eyes so he could no longer see your face and dream about you underneath him, and with that, he continues to thrust so harshly that it’s hurting you so good and your grip on his shoulders will surely leave a mark.
Soon you failed and cum before Jaehyun could. You exchanged sharp exhales, gasps, and quiet grunts before he lies beside you and kiss you deeply the whole night. One last time.  
As expected, you woke up alone in your bed with a sore body. You stretched for a few minutes before you got out of bed and head outside to have breakfast. At first, you thought that you will be alone again today but turns out Johnny is free.
“Belated Happy birthday. Did you like the flowers I got you?” he greets you good morning and gave you a bear hug.
“I did. I put it in a vase, it’s in my room. Thank you” now that Johnny is here and you’re not alone eating breakfast, you can’t help but wish for Jaehyun to be here.
“Jaehyun is uhm… working. I can take you out today, let’s have dinner and celebrate your birthday again. What do you say?” he offers excitedly and even showed you a great restaurant from his phone.
When the evening comes and you and Johnny should be out by now but you were having a hard time to chose what to wear, Jaehyun arrived out of nowhere with a girl on his shoulders. Someone not familiar and they’re holding hands.
“I think your friends are going out on a date aren’t they babe?” the girl asks Jaehyun, like she's tying to get his attention but Jaehyun’s eyes are glued on you. Eyes that are very much sorry because he didn’t mean for you to see his new girlfriend after your birthday. So this is why Johnny was rushing you tonight. He didn’t want you to see Jaehyun with his new girlfriend because he knew it will hurt you greatly.
“Y/n-“ Jaehyun called you but you didn’t bother looking back and told Johnny that you’re ready now… even though your earrings don't match with your dress. If he can try and be in a relationship with someone else then what does that make you? Why can’t he try for you?
The night went on, carrying the lie that you’re okay but to be honest, you don’t want to go back to that fucking dorm. Good thing, Johnny was trying so hard to cheer you up and make you forget about what happened. Which is working and for that you’re thankful.
On the same night, you swore to yourself that you will never let Jaehyun into your life again and make you feel small. You will never throw yourself to him again, or even spare a glance and waste your time with the one and only guy whom you allowed to break your heart over and over again. But not anymore.
Jaehyun was nothing but sweet to you and that’s all he’ll ever be.
Five years later
When you came home from work, you caught your boyfriend cooking dinner with a glass of cold wine beside him. You greet him, “hey” and kissed him on the cheek before you wrap your arms around his strong built body.
“Tired? Hows work? I have big news” he says while stirring something from the pan. You told him he could tell the big news first because he looks excited, and so he did. With big smiles and overflowing excitement, he said that “Jaehyun is going to get married and I’m his best man!” you almost let out a laugh but you stopped yourself.
“Mhmm. Guess who’s taking care of the wedding....” you teased him. But just as you burst your boyfriend’s bubble, his reaction was quite unexpected.
“N-no, don’t tell me it’s you” he suddenly stopped cooking, he wasn’t mad. Just shocked at the moment and because of the big news.
“Johnny- Don’t tell me you’re being jealous right now...” you tease him further, “he’s like a college fling baby, and you’re the real deal!” you kiss him on the lips but he’s still sulking and went back to cooking.
“We both know it’s not just a fling” he whines.
“He’s getting married and we’re literally inseparable. What are you so jealous of? You know I saw Jaehyun looked at his fiancé and guess what,”
“What?” he turns off the stove and prepared two plates for dinner which you helped him do.
“He never looked at me that way, but you did” you see a shy smile on his face now and poke his cheek but he's quick to catch your hand and pull you into a hug. The kind of hug only Johnny can provide.
“Sorry, that was so childish of me”
“It’s okay. Dinner looks good, is this a new recipe?”
Soon after dinner, Johnny expresses his apology in bed in many ways he can, making you feel good and treating you right as always until it became too exhausting because you don’t think you could cum anymore after having your fourth…or fifth? To be honest you’re not sure anymore.
But even though you’re tired and exhausted, you still can’t help but reminisce. Throughout the years of forgetting Jaehyun, Johnny has always been patient with you and waited for you to heal from Jaehyun. Johnny brought you to the movies and went out with you while Jaehyun only promised. It's like Jaehyun kept promising you things but Johnny is the one keeping them.
“I thought you’re exhausted?” He kissed your shoulder to bring you back to Earth when he saw you spacing out. “Stop thinking. I’ll marry you too, you know that right?” oh you know that all too well, so you nod and kissed him. Whispered ‘i love yous’ over and over again, and thanked him for being the one for you. It was never easy for both of you, but still, you yearn for each other. Sometimes, love will point us to the wrong person so we could find the right person to us. Yes, Jaehyun was sweet, but Johnny is not only sweet in fact he showed his love to you since day 1.
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daniclaytcn · 4 years ago
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there ain’t nothing common about us
a/n: some much needed comfort after all the hurt the fandom has put itself through this past week :)
aO3
title courtesy of @malikjavaddzayn, thank goodness she isn't as indecisive as i am!
tagging some people who may be interested: @evaneddie @diazalex @buttercupbuck @diazseddie @firefighter-diaz (please let me know if you'd like to be added/removed from my tag list!)
When Eddie wakes, it is violently and with a tortured gasp as he abruptly sits up in bed, the sheets tangled around him. He covers his face with his left hand for a moment, breathing heavily, fighting back the sobs that threaten to spring free, his body shaking like a leaf.
It isn’t the first time he’s woken up like since he was discharged from the hospital with a sling around his right shoulder and an acute sense of fear and paranoia that followed him even into the safety of his own home. It has been almost a month, but the nightmares wake Eddie almost every night, varying in degrees of severity. The first two weeks were the worst, reaching the peak when he screamed in his sleep loud enough to wake Christopher, leaving the boy shaken and terrified.
Eddie put Chris into therapy the next day, and started working on waking himself up before the nightmares could get out of hand. The last thing he wants to do his traumatize his son even more than he already is, Chris has been through far too much at such a young age.
The dreams seem to blend together most of the time, memories of Afghanistan and the shooting, making the lines between the two blurry and unrecognizable. Sometimes, he’ll see the bodies of his fellow soldiers scattered around him on a sunny street in LA. And other times, he’s in the inky-black darkness of the desert, reaching out for Buck, who seems impossibly far away, covered with sand and blood.
Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, Eddie reaches for his phone, wincing as the movement jostles his right shoulder. It’s 2 AM. Wonderful.
He tiptoes down the hallway to Chris’ room, cracking the door open just enough to see the shape of his son under the covers, sleeping peacefully. The sight makes something settle in his chest, the something that has been left askew after every single nightmare. He is here. He is safe. Christopher is safe. He didn’t leave him (again). They’ll be alright, eventually.
How pathetic is it that even after a month, he still needs to remind himself of it almost daily?
Eddie returns to his room and sits back down on his bed, leaning against the headboard as he feels a wave of bone-deep exhaustion wash over him. Between the PT and Chris’ therapy and occasional nightmares and his own nightmares, Eddie needs all the rest he can get. But he never can go back to sleep after waking up from an episode and. Well.
Maybe he should start going back to therapy, too. Eddie knows he’ll have to, eventually, to be cleared for duty. But before that, he still needs to get himself together. For Chris’ sake, if nothing else. He just—he can’t stand the thought of talking to some stranger about what happened, though. The only person he has been able to talk to so far is Buck.
Buck. He’s been a rock throughout this whole process, the entirety of the 118 has, really. Buck, though? He’s just been around, somehow more entwined in their lives than before, cooking meals, helping out Eddie with chores around the house, watching Chris when Eddie needs his rest. And coming from anyone else, it would make Eddie bristle, would make him protest that he doesn’t need all this extra help, to be treated like an invalid, but it never feels like that with Buck. Never has. He’s just…there, sometimes spending more time in Eddie’s house than his own apartment, putting up with Eddie’s occasional bursts of temper on harder days. He doesn’t allow Eddie to push him away, and Eddie thinks there’s nothing more he is grateful for, really.
Eddie is dialing Buck’s number before he can stop himself. While the two of them have talked about the incident, briefly, Eddie has never told him about the nightmares. He knows Buck blames himself, still, because he has a guilt complex possibly larger than Eddie’s own and Eddie…Eddie doesn’t want to be a burden. He should be able to deal with this himself. He did deal with it alone, after returning from Afghanistan. Why is this time so different?
Buck answers on the third ring. “Hey,” He doesn’t sound surprised or panicked at receiving a late-night call from Eddie. He doesn’t even sound like he’s been startled out of sleep, but Eddie feels the need to apologize anyway.
“I’m sorry for waking you,” He says, guilt feeling like lead in his stomach.
“It’s alright, I wasn’t asleep,” Buck says and before Eddie can wonder why, he’s asking, “Is everything alright?”
Eddie opens his mouth to answer and nothing comes out. He feels frustrated tears prick at his eyes and he exhales deeply, trying to hold them in.
“Eddie?” Buck sounds more concerned now, and Eddie can hear a rustling noise, like he’s sitting up.
“Sorry, yeah,” Eddie manages to get out, wondering if his voice sounds as wrecked to Buck as it does to him. “I, um—” Might as well just rip the bandage off and get it over with. “Nightmares.” He says, finally.
“I’m sorry,” Buck says, his voice taking on a softer, consoling lilt. He doesn’t sound surprised. Eddie doesn’t know why he expected him to be.
“It’s just—” Eddie breathes out harshly, gripping the phone harder. “I just can’t fucking sleep. It’s almost every night, I just keep reliving that day over and over and it never stops and I should be over it by now, right? And I should be able to hold it together, for Chris, he deserves so much better, but—God. It’s too much.”
“Have you considered going back to see Frank?” Buck asks, carefully. Eddie sighs.
“I did. I mean, it’s the right thing to do, isn’t it? I need to get better, and Chris—”
“But this isn’t about Chris, Eddie,” Buck interrupts, almost sharply. “You should want to get better for yourself, too. I mean, you were shot. In broad daylight, with zero warning—” he cuts himself off for a moment and Eddie can hear him exhale roughly over the line. “No one expects you to just bounce back. Trauma doesn’t exactly have a time limit, you know. You need to do what’s best for you.”
And Eddie can suddenly remember Carla’s words in that moment—Make sure you’re following your heart instead of Christopher’s—and wants to laugh hysterically at the irony of it. He knew then that Carla had a point—it’s why he broke up with Ana—and he knows that Buck has a point, too. But it isn’t as easy as it sounds.
“I’m not sure I know how.” He confesses.
“I know,” Buck says, softly, and sighs. “You always put Chris first, Eddie, that’s who you are, and that’s why I—”
Eddie holds his breath for a second. He isn’t sure what he’s expecting.
“Anyway,” Buck says, after too long a pause and Eddie deflates slightly. “You’re important too, Eddie. I wish you could see that. I wish you could—you could see yourself the way I see you.”
And how do you see me? Eddie wants to ask, but doesn’t dare. Things have changed since the shooting—there’s no way they couldn’t—and he feels like he and Buck have been hovering on the edge of a precipice, something electric and alien sparking between them. There isn’t a word for it, and neither of them have done anything about it. They’re really not in any state to do so. But lord, is Eddie tempted, sometimes.
“Why were you awake, anyway?” Eddie asks, wanting to break the thick tension that has suddenly formed. Buck sighs, like he was afraid he would ask.
“Nightmares,” He says, clearly trying to sound casual, but a waver in his voice gives him away.
Eddie’s chest clenches. “I’m sorry.”
Buck lets out a wet-sounding chuckles and Eddie hates the idea of it, him having nightmares all alone in that apartment. “Only you would apologize for getting shot, Eddie.”
“Come over,” Eddie says, before he can stop himself. “I know it’s late, but—I don’t think either of us should be alone right now.”
There’s a lengthy pause and Eddie almost wants to take it back but Buck, mercifully, speaks. “Are you sure you want me there?”
“Yes.” Is what Eddie says. I always want you here, is what he doesn’t dare to say.
Buck pauses again. Then—
“I’m on my way.”
Eddie turns off his phone and waits in the darkness for Buck to arrive. The moment he hears the key turn in the lock, he exhales a relieved breath and manages to smile when Buck appears in the doorway of the bedroom, hovering hesitantly, as though he expects that now he’s here, Eddie will change his mind and kick him out.
Eddie tries to sound exasperated, but it comes out sounding fond. “Buck, I really hope you didn’t come all the way here in the middle of the night just to crash on the couch.”
That makes him laugh and eases some of the tension from his shoulders. Kicking off his shoes, Buck moves over to the other side of the bed and lays down over the covers on his side, facing Eddie.
It should be uncomfortable, this level of intense intimacy that hasn’t been present in their relationship before. But right now, Eddie feels the most comfortable and relaxed he has in a while and he can only hope that Buck feels the same way, too. He reaches out, a little tentatively, to take Buck’s hand in his.
The other man stiffens slightly and he looks at Eddie with something like wonder in his eyes.
“Don’t make this weird, Buck,” Eddie murmurs, hoping to break some of the tension. It works, and Buck lets out a startled chuckle.
“God, you’re such an asshole.” But he complies, slotting his fingers through Eddie’s and squeezing tight. Eddie can remember him doing it in the firetruck on the way to the hospital and he swallows. He’s glad he has a better memory to replace that with.
Eddie closes his eyes, feeling a hazy, soft, sort of comfort settle into his bones, with Buck’s touch and just him, there, so close by. He can’t help but wonder why it took them so long, to give each other the comfort they each need.
“Buck?” He murmurs, without opening his eyes. Buck hums in reply. It feels strangely domestic and makes Eddie’s heart beat a little faster.
“I think I will go to see Frank,” He says. “But for myself, this time.”
Eddie can’t see Buck’s face when he replies, but can hear it, the tender, proud smile in his voice. “I’m so glad, Eddie.” He says, his voice cracking a little bit.
If Buck says anything after that, Eddie can’t hear it, as sleep pulls him under into the most restful night he’s had yet. And when he wakes in the morning, Buck curled around him, his face peaceful and serene in the golden sunlight, Eddie can revel in the fact that the feeling was mutual.
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mostly-marvel-musings · 4 years ago
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Typical Stark
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Request: Enemies to lovers prompt for Tony Stark by @agustdowney​ Hope you like this one babe ;))
Pairing: Tony Stark x Reader
Warnings: Swearing, sass, fluff.
Word count: 1400ish oops?!
Fall Prompts Masterlist
Tony Stark Taglist - @raspberrymama​  @ladyeliot​ @boop-le-snoot​ @make-a-memory-drink-it-up​ @loveisallyouneed1125​  @ownsmyheart​ @anthonyjanthony666​ @downeyreads​
Everything Taglist – @godofplumsandthunder​  @ladyacrasia​ @agustdowney​ @swaggysposts​ @littlegasps​ @little-baby-vixen​  @another-stark-sub​ @supraveng​ @kahlanmars​ @marvelgirl7​ @disappointmentofthefam​  @pandaxnienke​ @tom-hlover​ @just-the-hiddles​  @fyreball66 @asmigurub​
Tags are open! Send in an ask or DM if you wish to be in any of the taglists ;))
“Would you hurry up?” you whispered, looking around the room to make sure the guards hadn’t returned, gun at the ready in your vest, just in case.
“Why? You got a hot date?” Tony asked, not really wanting to know the answer, just a natural retort that escaped while his fingers flew over the keyboard in front of him as he retrieved data from the computer and backed it up on his drive.
“Even if I did I wouldn’t tell you.”
“Aww why? You know how interested I am in your sex life.” His snarky comeback making you clench your fists to stop yourself from slapping that smirk off of his face.
“Would you just—why don’t you hurry up so we can be on our separate ways? I have no intentions of fighting with you.” you huffed, not missing Tony’s shrug.
Why did Rogers send the two of you for this mission? Sure you were in an unknown city, which Tony just ‘happened’ to be in. The man could have handled it all by himself with all the gadgets he kept boasting about, but no, the Captain seemed to have sensed the hostility between the two of you and wanted the dynamic to be more amicable. Somewhere deep down you wanted the same, but given how he got your goat on every occasion, it was hard to say the least.
“All done Miss (Y/L/N). Let’s get outta here.” Tony spun around to face you, waiting for you to take the lead, you were covering for him today after all.
The guards were easy to dodge but apparently one of the cameras wasn’t, and Stark got in its range of vision, triggering the alarm and alerting the entire building. It didn’t take long for heavy footsteps to sound through the floors as heavily armed men ran in search of the imposters.
“Goddamn it Stark! We had this.” You cursed, running up the fire exit towards the rooftop hoping for a quick escape as Tony tailed behind, already winded from the climb.
Your eyes scanned the surroundings for a place to hide, at least jump into while Tony typed something on his watch. Six men burst through the doors and fired in your direction as you dodged every bullet before firing from your own shotgun, bringing two of them down successfully as your bullet hit them in their kneecaps. A few moments later, a swooshing sound pierced the air as you saw Tony’s Mark XIV flew down and enveloped Tony’s form in a fashion that temporarily managed to halt the ongoing combat.
“Why didn’t you tell me you had a fucking suit?” you yelled as he blasted the remainder of men with his repulsors before walking over to you and taking off the ground, leaving you to grab onto his neck over the armor like a rescued ‘damsel’. You kept yelling and he kept ignoring and in turn, neither of you noticed a man firing a small device onto the suit with precision that stuck on just in time before the building went out of sight.
“I think we’re about to crash –” you managed to scream before Tony’s suit gave out and sent the two of you plummeting down towards the gravel covered road. He somehow maneuvered the fall so that he landed on his back and held you tightly against him, protecting you as the impact made the suit fall apart in pieces around him while you screamed before the hit knocked the wind from your chest.
.
Your eyes opened gingerly, unsure if you two had made it alive before Tony’s rapidly rising and falling chest reaffirmed you that you had. His grip on you hadn’t budged, the metal embrace now replaced with a shirt covered one.
“Tony?”
“Yeah all good. Are you hurt?” His voice came out muffled due to the still intact faceplate as you managed to roll off of him, Tony glanced at his watch that was smashed to pieces before removing the plate manually, revealing a bloody nose and a cut to his forehead.
Your ribs smarted as you stood up dusting the dirt off your clothes, your gun missing and arms sporting small cuts and bruises. Once the initial shock wore off, your anger resurfaced and began storming away from Tony while he was too busy getting his bearings to notice.
“Hey! What about my suit? It’s offline..I-I need to get it-” he called out but you cut him off after turning around fuming.
“That’s your lookout Stark. You didn’t even think to tell me you had a suit on standby. This whole fucking operation was a waste of my time. You could’ve just done it all by yourself but no here you are behaving like a typical Stark.”
You muttered the rest of the walk, not caring if Tony was actually listening, which of course he was, he hadn’t seen such a strong reaction from you ever. A part of him was amused but most of him was afraid so he decided to follow quietly. Looking back every so often to make sure no one was on their tail.
“Um..Where are we going?” Tony tried after a few breaths when your rage-filled stomping was replaced with a brisk walk.
Silence.
You came across an empty woodshed shortly after, that would have to suffice by the time you called for backup. Making yourself comfortable in a dusty corner after sending your location details to Natasha you glanced sideways to see what your ‘teammate’ was up to.
Tony was pacing about fidgeting and muttering something to himself just outside the woodshed.
“Would it kill you to sit still for a moment?”
“Oh we’re speaking now?”
“Never mind.”
Rolling your eyes, you slammed your head back to the wall of the shed with too much force as it resulted in tears springing into your eyes. Clenching them shut you prayed the team would extract you as quickly as possible because it was starting to get dark outside.
“I’m sorry (Y/L/N)” Tony whispered, his voice meek enough for anyone to miss but thanks to your super sharp hearing, you caught the unexpected apology.
“Definitely hearing things.” You muttered, eyes still closed.
“I just—I said I’m sorry okay? I shouldn’t have put you in unnecessary danger. I fucked up.”
“I’m very much capable of defending myself against any danger Stark. What you should have done is taken care of this operation all by yourself since you had your fancy toys.”
“I always have backup in any operat—“
“Then why the fuck was I called for this mission?” You yelled, finally looking at the man who looked like he’d just been scolded, eyes cast downward, shoulders sagged and mouth opening and closing without any actual words coming out.
“I insisted you accompany me today. I—I’ve always admired your combat skills, you’re quite a remarkable woman.” Tony’s admission left you speechless, you hadn’t expected this answer at all.
“You’ve ‘admired’ my combat skills?”
“That’s what I said.” Tony muttered, avoiding eye contact.
You didn’t know if it was the exhaustion finally setting in or the situation but you laughed, shaking your head at a realization unknown to present company.
Typical Stark
“You really have a thing for women in power don’t you?”
“What makes you say that?”
“Why else would you hire Natasha as your hot-shot secretary all those years ago? Insist I accompany you today? Why are you with the great Pepper Potts then!”
That little disdain in your voice over the last one wasn’t unnoticed by Tony.
“Well you’re right about the first two.”
“What?”
“Pepper and I aren’t together.” Tony stated, matter-of-factly, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Why, she got tired of having a relationship with Dum-E instead of you?” You regretted saying this the minute it left your lips because Tony’s eyes met yours with a look of heartbreak that had you internally curse yourself.
“Bingo.”
“I—I’m sorry Tony, that was unnecessary. I didn’t mean to—”
He dismissed you with a wave of his hand, resuming his pacing as the silence stretched longer. 
“Well if you ever need to talk, or a drinking buddy.”
You waved your hand towards him offering him a small smile in hopes that he’d consider your attempts of making nice.
He chuckled giving you a curt nod, still a little embarrassed about his confession, but internally deciding which bottle of whiskey to crack open later today at the tower if you’d join.
Typical Stark.
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I have a fluffy smutty Part 2 in mind already!
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sooibian · 4 years ago
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Catch These Hands
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Pairing: Baekhyun x Fem!Reader
Description: Living with Baekhyun comes with its own challenges
Themes: Fluff (surprise!!!!), established relationship, make up artist and masseur Byun, a little bit of byuntae, and one (1) Eminem reference lol
Prompt: @/notyourenglishprofessor : You SAY you didn’t eat in bed but these crumbs say differently.
A/N: Happy Birthday @is-that-baekhyuns-shirt​ !!!! here’s your biggest pet peeve woven into a bbh fic! Hope you enjoy it XD
Word count: ~ 1.7k
Nights out have never agreed with you. It’s 2 a.m. and your feet hurt from the heels, your head hurts from the drinks, your little black dress (your best friend sure does have a penchant for party clichés) is mocking your food baby, your makeup feels clumpy - maybe you overused the setting powder but you wouldn’t know because the complex art of blending cosmetics has always eluded you. How do they make it look so easy in YouTube tutorials?
As you’re keying in the passcode to your apartment, despite all the malaise, a sudden surge of comfort courses through your veins at the thought of your adorable boyfriend asleep in a clean, cozy bed, engulfed in warm and fresh sheets that exude the fragrance of a spring meadow - courtesy of your brand new laundry detergent. You imagine he is dressed in his snuggly pajamas, with his lips slightly parted, dark hair tousled, and your ostrich plushie clutched to his chest. Ever since you started living with him, you’d never spent a night away from home but the one time you returned after a weekend long Neuroscience conference, you found your plushie resting in the comfort of his arms. The next morning he insisted that he didn’t know where it came from.  
‘Time to catch him red handed’, you smile to yourself.
Kicking off your heels and scraping your hair up in a bun, you tiptoe to your bedroom and the faint melody of Baekhyun singing in a highly expressive croon falls upon your ears.
Tell me you’ll love again, come back to me again..
He should’ve been long asleep and while you can’t wait to crash out either, you allow yourself the pleasure of eavesdropping on his heavenly vocals that always sound especially sweet when he’s wrestling sleep. Until..until you hear it.. the sharp crunch of plastic which sends you barging into the bedroom with exasperation painted across your features. 
Baekhyun clamps his mouth shut. 
Instead of jumping out of bed to wrap you in his arms, he uncharacteristically stays burrito-ed in his duvet, fixing you with an apologetic gaze. Elbow crushing the pillow underneath him, shoulders crouched, lips pursed, hair dishevelled, pajama bottoms scrunched up to his calves, he tries to blink away the very apparent guilt in his eyes. Your ostrich plushie lay on your side of the bed as if its neck had been snapped like a popsicle stick. 
As you loom over him, lower lip wobbling, he pushes his weight further down the pillow but the tail end of the red Orion choco pie wrapper teasingly peeks from underneath it, glimmering in the cozy golden lighting of the bedroom, already chuckling at the drama that is to ensue.
You’re too tired for this.
Without a word to him, you grab a bunch of blankets from the dresser, shut it with a loud bang and stomp out of the room while Baekhyun’s bearing is that of a frozen frame. As you’re questioning your life choices and are about to vent your frustration on the irreproachable couch, your weary gaze finds the bane of your existence again - crumbs. White, inelegant fragments of food conspicuous against your tan sofa.
They say the more you try to avoid something, the more you create it. This was unequivocally the worst quote you’d ever read. You created nothing! You were not the one to leave this slew of crumbs on the sofa neither did you leave a pile of crumbs on the bed! It was all Baekhyun! 
You’re way too tired for this.
Drowsy, you lie down on the floor, curled up in the many blankets, although still cautious as your piercing eyes doggedly probe for more evidence of Baekhyun’s insolence. Surprisingly, the rug was clean-ish. It was almost as if he had planned on you sleeping on the floor tonight. This thought fuels the rage bubbling in the pit of your stomach so you force your eyes shut to avoid a shouting match this late in the night. 
The shuffling sound of footsteps grows closer and you’re determined not to give him the satisfaction of even a glance. The sound comes to a halt and you feel a gentle caress of warm fingers ghosting over your cheeks which is quickly replaced with a smooth and cool touch of a cotton pad against your eyelids, cheekbones, jaw line, with a distinct scent of micellar water wafting in the little to no space between Baekhyun and you.
You continue to play dead as he’s quietly and deftly taking your makeup off while delicately holding you up by the back of your neck and you coyly move your face from side to side to allow him better access to every inch of your skin.
“Too much setting powder”, he whispers.
Darnit!
“Still so pretty”, he remarks in his dulcet voice. Your head now rests in his lap and he’s gently moving his thumbs in tiny circles under your brows, working his way from inside out and continuing the movement all around your eyes and ending back at the bridge of your nose, almost lulling you to sleep.   
At this point every cell in your body is waging a war against your now weakened spirit that’s continuing to disregard him yet you find yourself revelling in his mellow affections.
“It’s a rookie mistake. Not to worry, baby, I’ll help you get it right the next time.” He reassures, planting a soft kiss on your pout.
“Right”, eyes still wilfully shut, you chastise him, “maybe when you find the time from eating in bed.”
“Yah! Don’t be like that.” Baekhyun whines, prying your eyes open with his fingers, not-so-gently.
You smack the back of his hand and sit up cross legged facing him. He stretches his hand out to pat your head and you smack it again invoking a look of pure confusion in Baekhyun’s soft features. His hand is now barely an inch away from your lips and he commands with a raised brow, “Now kiss it better.” 
“Ew!” Your hand strikes the back of his, again. “How many times do I have to tell you not to -”
“Not to eat in bed!” Baekhyun completes your sentence with a deep sigh, “I know and I wasn’t -”
“Do not lie to me Byun Baekhyun!” Warning him, you wag your finger as annoyance betrays your voice, rendering your pitch shrill. Dusting the corners of his mouth with the pads of your fingers, you sneer, “These crumbs say otherwise. You know I hate it when you eat in bed! It’s ...It’s….disgusting! And -”
“And?” 
“You always ignore my post-its!”
Baekhyun huffs and runs a hand through his hair. Letting on a forced smile, he reasons, “We’ve been living together for three years now. I think it’s time you stopped leaving ‘do not eat’ post-it notes on everything you buy!”
Tilting your head to the side, you explain animatedly, “First of all, you won’t let me buy snacks on our grocery runs because they’re unhealthy or whatever and you want to bring about a stupid dietary reform in the household which, by the way, is failing miserably - ”
“Yah!! We’re still in January, don’t be such a pessimist!”
“Do not interrupt me! The few that I do manage to sneak into the cart are mine and mine alone!”
“It’s just that..the ones that you buy taste better”, he mumbles, unveiling the most powerful weapon in his artillery - the pout.
“That is the most ridiculous thing that’s come out of your mouth today aside from the crumbs! I imagined you’d be...”, it’s nearly 3 a.m. and you’re starting to descend into a fugue state, “you’d be...curled up in bed like a...like a... cooked shrimp with a plushie clutched to it’s chest!”
Visibly offended, he flicks your forehead and bellows, “Cooked shrimp!? It’s called the fetal position. Look it up!”
“I know what it’s called!” Your livid expression eases into a rather ill meaning smile, “My apologies, I took you for a grown man.”
“What in the world - I am a grown man!” His lips stretch into a wide grin and the tips of his fingers tease the sensitive spot on your neck, “would you like to see?”
“You’re disgusting, Byun Baekhyun! A grown man does not eat in bed!” You smack the back of his hand. Again.
“Strike four! You’re obligated to kiss it better now!” 
Tears start to well up in your eyes at the sight of his hand dangling so close to your face. “I’m tired”, you cry, burying your face in your hands as exhaustion and exasperation take over, “I really need you to stop eating in bed.” 
“Babe, I -” His eyes grow into large brown circles at the sight of your distressed state and he freezes.
“I feel like the crumbs will, like, turn into ferocious ants and nibble at my skin while I’m asleep”, you break into full blown sobs and Baekhyun takes you in his arms, holding you tight against his warm and comforting frame and patting your head to calm you down.
“Hush, baby”, he sing-songs, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! You go get changed into something comfortable and I’ll dust the bed, okay?”
“Can you change the sheets instead?” Sniffling, you ask him with wide, pleading eyes, a sly smile playing at your lips.
His eyebrows shoot upwards and he exclaims, “It’s three in the morn-”
“Please?” You sing-song, a little too loudly.
He lets out a deep sigh, “Okay! I’ll change the sheets.”
With his slightly dispirited face sandwiched between your hands, you ask cheerfully, “And you promise to never eat in bed again?” 
“I promise to never eat in bed again.” A dejected Baekhyun says to his knees. 
“And you won’t steal my snacks?”
You had now started to push your luck with him, but it was a risk you were willing to take.
He flicks your forehead a little harshly this time making you squeal. “Can you stop with the stupid post-its, already?”
Rubbing your forehead, you surrender and get up. “Fine! I’ll go shower now.”
Baekhyun wraps his arms around your waist. Nuzzling your neck, he coos seductively, "I’ll join you.” 
“Byun Baekhyun!”
235 notes · View notes
slkw · 4 years ago
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Completely and Utterly (Peter Pevensie x Reader)
Part 2 Part 3 
summary : (Y/n) showed up in Narnia not unlike the Pevensie siblings did during the Golden Age and has been living in Cair Paravel since. Peter and (y/n) have been in love with each other for a while, but are both stupidly oblivious to the feelings. However, will a ball and a shared dance make them acknowledge what is truly there?
y/n - your name
n/n - nickname 
This is my first piece of writing that I have ever posted or really shared with anyone so I hope you enjoy this and if some people do I might make a part 2?? :)
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I slowly walked down the grand staircase, the train of my crimson ball gown following closely behind me. As I glanced up I could see Peter at the bottom of the staircase waiting for me with his hand out for me to take. I could not help but smile at the gesture.
This was my first ball in Narnia. I was terrified but the mere sight of the oldest Pevensie sibling make my heart slow down a few paces. Once I reached the bottom of the staircase my left hand reached out to hold Peter’s and my right one hoisted up my dress.
‘You look beautiful,’ Peter said. I blushed and bowed my head.
‘As do you.’
Peter was wearing a loose white shirt, that clung tightly to his wrists with dark black trousers. He looked like a god. His hair fell over his face perfectly and his dimples were very evident as he wore a large smile.
I snapped out of my thoughts as I linked arms with Peter, and he began walking me into the bustling ballroom. The room was packed with people dancing and laughing. The music from the orchestra bounced off every wall, reaching the tops of the high ceiling.
Peter placed his hands delicately on my waist as we begun to dance. However, the music quickly changed, and he grinned at me as the pace of our danced increased. My heart raced as adrenaline coursed through my body. Everything around us vanished and it felt as though it was only him and I alone in this huge ballroom.
Unknown to us – everyone had stopped dancing, and all eyes were on us. There was now a large clearing in the middle of the hall, and we danced quickly around the room, passing the other three Pevensie siblings on the way, all of which sported large smirks.
I was completely and utterly entranced. His blue eyes shone, eye contacting never faulting. As the song came to a stop, so did we. We then stood in the middle of the ballroom, completely breathless and utterly in love (however, this was not known to either of us).
The hall broke into an applause, snapping us from our trance. We both blushed bright scarlet with embarrassment. Peter bowed; I curtsied. The orchestra began playing another song as the applause died out. This song bared a steadier and slower rhythm.
‘That was amazing,’ a voice from our left said.
We both turned our heads to see Edmund standing there – grinning. ‘If you would not mind Peter, may I steal (y/n) for this dance?’
‘Of course,’ Peter replied, slightly hesitant but nevertheless, he gave Edmund my hand.
Edmund and I began to dance. He leant forward and whispered in my ear, ‘You like him, don’t you?’
I stumbled over my words, attempting to deny it. However, my attempts were not convincing, and I eventually confessed.
‘I knew it, I think everyone does. Well, except Peter. He’s too in love with you to notice.’
Edmund gently spun me as I replied, ‘What – Peter cannot possibly be in love with me. He would have said something. Right?’
‘Dear (y/n), you are just as oblivious as him. Yes of course he is in love with you. Have you not seen the way he looks at you?’ Edmund teased.
‘Like what? He looks at everyone the same.’
‘Not you, he looks at you as though you might vanish into thin air if he looks away.’
I was at a loss for words. He actually likes me. The High King of Narnia likes me. My face was completely flushed red, almost matching my dress. Edmund could not help but smile at the blush painted across my face. We continued to dance gracefully, as the conversation topic switched from Peter to castle gossip and the likes.
 However, all while Edmund and I were immersed in our dancing and conversation, Peter was watching us both like a hawk. Although he would probably hate to admit, he was in fact jealous. From his point of view Edmund had his hand on my waist while I blushed and laughed along with him. Peter was completely oblivious to the fact that the blush along my cheeks was caused by himself. The thought of him being in love me with continuously ran through my head, along with the dance we had just shared.
Once again the song came to an end and this time it was replaced with an upbeat song. Edmund walked me over to Peter and Lucy who stood drinking out of golden rimmed goblets.
‘Where’s Susan?’ I questioned.
Peter nonchalantly nodded his head over towards Susan who was dancing with the Prince of the Lone Islands. I smiled and giggled at the sight of the lovestruck Susan. I turned back towards Peter and Lucy, Edmund’s arm still interlocked with mine. Peter looked unusually upset and I shot him a look of worry, to which he just brushed off. I ignored this action and slowly released my arm from Edmund’s and curtsied low in front of Lucy to meet her height and said, ‘Queen Lucy the Valiant, would you give me the honour of having this dance?’
She giggled and curtsied back, ‘Why yes of course.’
She took my arm and walked into the middle of the ballroom once again. I took her small hands in mine and began to spin her around.
Edmund walked over to Peter all while watching Lucy and I mess around in our ball gowns. ‘What’s the matter Pete?’ Edmund queried.
‘It’s nothing,’ replied Peter, attempting to keep up his High King façade and not let his feelings through.
‘Would it be anything to do with (y/n)?’ Edmund shot back.
Peter just glanced away and made up an excuse of having to attend to the guests to avoid any further questions on him and (y/n). Edmund was left smirking at where Peter stood moments previous.
 As the night came to an end, all the guests left Cair Paravel, and I retired back to my room. I untied to back of my dress and let it fall to the ground, pooling by my feet. Stepping out of the dress, I slipped on my nightgown. The sounds of the waves crashing against the shore was distant but comforting. The events of the evening played on repeat in my head, however, I was still unsure of why Peter was so dismissive of me after the ball.
Exhaustion began to take over me, but due to not wanting to sleep just yet I opened the glass door onto the balcony and let the cool air fall over me. I walked out onto the balcony and took in the sight of Narnia sleeping. The stars laughed amongst each other as they shone down onto the castle and the trees rustled silently with one another. A dark silhouette came into view from the corner of my eye. I turned my head to see Peter also standing silently on his balcony a few along from mine. His white shirt billowed in the wind as his hands gripped the edge of the stone balcony. He looked so beautiful in the moonlight, I could not help but stare. I quietly coughed to grab his attention and when his eyes met mine, he was unable to conceal the small smile on the face. I motioned for him to wait there and dashed back into my room. The dressing gown that laid on my bed was quickly wrapped around my body and I was running down the hallway, not actually processing what I was doing.
 Pushing his door open, I could see him still standing on his balcony waiting for me – just as I had asked. At the sound of the door being opened, he turned around. I stepped out onto the cold stone, a nervous smile beginning to form on my face.
‘Hi’, I said, my voice wavering slightly.
‘Hi’, he repeated.
We then both stood there in silence, taking in the view of Narnia, just as we both were doing separately moments before. ‘Is everything alright?’ I questioned breaking the silence.
‘Yeah, I am just a little tired – that’s all.’
‘Peter. You don’t need to lie to me.’
Nothing was said back, and we continued to stand in the quiet. I rested my hands against the balcony and leaned over the side, looking down on the courtyard below. From the corner of my eye, I could see him staring at me, with a look on his face I could not describe. Nonetheless, it made me blush.
‘I enjoyed tonight,’ he spoke.
‘As did I,’ I replied.
Without warning, he placed his hand over mine. My heart skipped a few beats as I turned to face him.
‘Do you like Edmund?’ Peter blurted out, finally admitting what had been on his mind most of the night.
‘No, what would make you think that?’ I queried.
‘I don’t know, it’s just the way you look at him,’ he said.
‘Edmund is like a brother to me, nothing more. He is fun to have around and we share the same interests. He has really made me feel welcome in Narnia.’
‘Have I?’ said Peter, changing the subject.
‘More than anyone actually.’
After this was said, a deep blush made its way onto Peter’s face; I giggled at the sight and took his hand into mine. My eyes could not help but flicker down to his lips. ‘You look tired (n/n), you should sleep,’ Peter said.
The use of this new nickname made my heart jump in my chest. I bowed my head, attempting to hide my crimson face. At the sight of this, Peter lifted my chin upwards with his hand, causing us to make eye contact.
‘I should probably go back to my room then,’ I said, the tension between us making my legs feel as though they would give way any second.
I took my hand from his and made my way to the oak door that separated his room from the hallway.
‘Wait,’ he said just as I was about to turn the doorknob, ‘you could stay in my room for the night.’
‘Only if you want to,’ he added.
I did not know what to do or say or think. Did Peter Pevensie really ask me to stay in his room for the night?
‘I – I, I would love to’, I stammered out.
He motioned toward the bed and I got in, pulling the covers up to my chest. I laid my head against the silk pillows and closed my eyes. At the sound of buttons popping, I opened them again to see Peter taking off his shirt. I could not help but stare. His back muscles were quickly exposed as they flexed with movement. His eyes met mine as he nervously said, ‘Is this okay?’
‘More than okay.’
As my eyes fell closed in exhaustion, I felt him get in beside me and his arms pull me into his chest. I could hear Peter whisper something into my hair, but I drifted into unconsciousness before I could reply. I am still not sure, but it sounded very much like the words, ‘I love you.’
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give-grian-rights · 4 years ago
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CHAPTER TWO HOUR. CHAPTER TWO HOUR. I AM SO TIRED. IT IS 6AM. TELL ME IF HTERE’S TYPOS AND THAT NORMAL STUFF
Bets Against The Void, Chapter 2
Chapter 1
Chapter 3
Whitelist au from @petrichormeraki
Crossposted on AO3
Tubbo quietly chuckled, smiling fondly as their friend squawked indignantly. “Tubbo! I’m serious, explain some shit, fuckin’ nerd!” Tommy scoffed, prodding at their side with his elbow. Tubbo hushed him, their smirk still lingering.
  “Hermitcraft is a super crazy popular server. If you’ve ever searched for examples of builds on your tablet, chances are, they’re from one of the Hermits. Or if you looked up something about redstone! Anything! You’ll find one of their instructions. They’re geniuses- just, complete geniuses. Grian’s one of them-”
  “Grian’s one of them!?” Tommy exclaimed, his eyes shooting open. Tubbo’s grin widened, nodding vigorously. “Yes! He’s the newest Hermit, last I heard.. Most of the guys he’s teammates with every MCC, they’re usually other Hermits!” They’d continue explaining to the best of their ability.
  “Should’ve fuckin’ started with the fact that Grian’s here! That fuckin’ dude! He killed Dream three times! Three times, Tubbo!” The blond continued with his excited shouting. Well, that certainly fixed the situation, Tubbo mused.
  The brunett nodded along, chuckling. “Yeah! He, and most of the others, really- post all that much right now. The new World Client, with the axolotls and caves ‘n stuff? They’ve started posting and sharing discoveries about that.  I know Grian did, at least. But considering they call themselves the ‘Hermits’ it makes sense to be a bit inactive, yeah?” Tubbo shrugged, tapping the chilly cool sandstone beneath them.
  Tommy nodded dumbly, glancing around the room for a moment. Tubbo, meanwhile, had pulled their tablet up. The holographic comm system was displayed infront of them, everything on the screen they touched being read aloud to them.
  Launching an accessibility app, the tablet began describing aloud the block palette, dimensions, and colors. As the tablet’s robotic voice played in his com system, reading aloud the details of his surrounding, Tubbo nodded along to an incoherent rant from Tommy.
Tubbo wasn’t too sure what Tommy was ranting about- likely MCC, and Grian. Grian got a kill on Tommy, last MCC, if they remember correctly.  The brunnett wouldn’t be surprised if that was the target of the blond’s current tangent. Tommy hadn’t even been able to get a word out, when Grian began shouting vigorous apologises between matches.
  The descriptions from the tablet were long, and boring. The robotic voice drawing on and on, as it attempted to describe the intricate room. Shutting down the program, Tubbo tuned back into Tommy. 
  “Fuckin’ am..So fucking tired. Of course we ended up here. It’d be to easy if we’d just be let back into Dream SMP, huh? Think Dream even knew we were out? I bet not. Even if he does, probably didn’t even care, fuckin’ dick. Bet that green asshole’s just sitting over his code and shit, simping over Gogy-” The blond ranted heatedly. The blind teen could hear the shifting and chustling of fabric, before the boy’s voice became muffled.
  With his head pressed against his knees, legs drawn to his chest, Tommy sat there practically panting. His chest heaved, the rage draining from him. “Why is all- all of this, always so complicated, Tubbo?” Blue eyes turned to meet the scarred, burnt front of the other.
  Tubbo picked at faded and torn tennis shoes, tentatively listening. The rymnatic pattern of the boy’s breathing, and the crashing overhead, offered some vague comfort. “All of what?” They’d tilt their head.
  The younger of the two quietly sighed, his mouth pressed in a thin line. His hand clutched the bottom of his torn, tan cargo pants, fidgetting with the frayed ends. “Us. Shit with us, it always gets so fuckin’ complicated. Big Man, you’re president. You’re- you’re the fucking president, now, Tubbo.”
  The bunnett’s brows furrowed together, as they inched closer to their friend. “Yeah. But it’s- it’s still us, y’know? If- if life was easy, then we’d be missing out on a lot of things. What if we had just never met-”
“We’d always meet eachother, Tubbo. There’s no fuckin’ getting rid of me, even in your fantasy world.” The blond nudged the teen’s shoulder, a wolfish grin evident in his tone.
  That made the other crack a smile, shaking their head. “I hope so, Tommy.” They’d chuckle, shaking their head. The weight of the day came crashing down all again. Before the rushing thoughts could boggle down their mind, Tubbo slumped against Tommy’s side sigh an exhausted sigh.
  “This is just, livin’ the fucking life, huh?” Tommy remarked, looking over his friend. The tall boy already shifted himself, his long legs sprawled out on the floor with his back leaned against sandstone walls.
  His head leaned against that of his compaignian, half-lidded blue eyes giving one last surveillance of the room. “We’ll figure this shit out tomorrow..” Tommy mumbled, glancing down at the brunette.
  Tubbo was already asleep, their expression finally one of peace. Tommy wasn’t given a moment more to appreciate the serenity of the quiet room, before he’d be pulled into slumber as well.
  Both of the teens were stirred awake by the whirring noises of an active portal- the Netherportal beside them, with particles flying, gaveway to two players. Tommy kicked himself up to his feet, defensively. Tubbo stumbled along with him, pulling back away from the strangers.
Though two stepped out, only one immediately caught Tommy’s eyes.
  “W- Holy shit!  You’re Grian!” Tommy squawked indignantly.
  Tubbo’s head immediately shot up, excitably breaking into a grin. Any exhaustion the two held was wiped away- neither was sure how long their unrestful sleep had been, but it was far more than other nights. 
  The target of the excitement, Grian, sheepishly stood there, nodding. “Uh, yeah! You guys are Tommy and Tubbo, yeah?  I’ve seen you at most of the MCC’s I’ve been to. You both did really good last time, by the way! I’m really looking forward to the next one!” 
This was easily the closest they probably ever were to the dirty blond. He also looked far more at ease, on this server. The iconic figure, ever-present in the community, had his wild mop of a fringe frazzled and framing his face.
  Poking under the bangs, Tommy could now see faint, ragged lines from a scar, along with other various healed-over wounds. Another contrary to how either of them had seen Grian, at MCC, was the large circular glasses loosely sat on his face.
Seeing one of his heroes like this (The only one that hadn’t betrayed, killed him, turned against him, despised him-) in such a..Domestic state, was bizarre. Tommy was scrambling for words, starting and giving up on getting his tongue around what to say.
  “This is so cool! Hi! I used to watch and- and listen, to a lot of your old build tutorials! A lot of people on our server would always say how we learned building from you!” Tubbo would blurt out, practically bouncing on their heel. Grian turned to the teen, slightly shocked but amused. 
  “Oh! I- well thank you! I’m glad I could be any help at all- my builds are nothing compared to some of what the other Hermits have going on..Speaking of others- this is Stress!” He’d take the opportunity to escape the small spotlight, glancing towards the brunette woman next to him sheepishly.
  The woman- Stress, apparently, quietly chuckled. A fond smile grazed her face, as she looked over towards the two teenagers. “Ello there, Loves! Sorry to interrupt your fan meetup,” She teased, side-eyeing the dirty blond beside her.  “We just wanted to come and check in, is all! X told us two to come visit, yeah?”
  Tommy quietly hummed skeptically,  surveying her. Short brown hair hung barely as low as her shoulder, a neat, white, blue, and pink flower-crown sat upon her head. The colors must’ve been very purposeful, considering they matched with her colorful outfit of the same color.
  “Fine, sure..Well, we’re still fuckin’ breathing, and we’re here. So you don’t really need to be here any longer, yeah?” Tommy scoffed, slumping back against the wall. Tubbo was already standing, nudging at his side. 
  “Thank you, for checking in. I- I’m sure this is a bit of a strange situation. That- Yeah, that’s my bad.” They chuckled sheepishly, rubbing the back of their neck. This caught Stress’ attention, turning towards the tene.
  “Oh, no! This isn’t a problem at all. Dear, this happens all the time. Grian just- just appeared, one day, in our previous server. We walk out the portal for the first time- and boom! There that weirdo is!” Stress chuckled, her grin unwavering as she gave a playful nudge to the dirty blond beside her.
  Grian scoffed, a smirk edging at his lips as he rolled his eyes. “Okay, but I’m not the only example of that happening- you didn’t have to pick me out specifically!”
  “Sure I do, Love! You’re the first new Hermit to join, after me and Zed! I get to bully you, lovingly!” She cheered. Stress’ energy was absolutely efficacious, Tubbo couldn’t help but smile and cackle at her and Grian’s banter.
“Uh huh,” Grian scoffed, dramatically crossing his arms. “Last I checked, that was Iskall’s job to bully newcomers- oh, Gord, when you all walked out of the portal and they just decked me ? I mean, it didn’t really hurt all that bad, but it’s a matter of the principle!”
  Stress seemed like she was almost gonna break down with laughter, clutching her stomach. “I forgot they did that with you, too! Iskall certainly is one that needs work with their introduction, that absolute weirdo!” She chostled, shaking her head fondly.
  She then turned towards the two teens, reassuringly smiling. “They won’t give you any hard time, they’re just like that sometimes, especially in the beginning of a new season..They’re usually just incomprehensible in the beginning, I learnt!” She giggled, covering her mouth.
  Tubbo awkwardly laughed, nodding. “Yeah- they, they sound like something.” It was..A strange environment, to be sure.
  Sure, they knew of the Hermits, their reputation impossible to avoid- but most outsiders didn’t know much about the actual Hermits. They went by that title for a reason.
  Tommy was having similar thoughts, he felt as if he was completely imposing on, everything. But he couldn’t find it in himself to care- it frankly was..Warming, almost, to see this. He missed being able to have that, on Dream’s server. 
  The blond in particular seemed to have tuned out, because by the time he snapped out of those thoughts, Grian was speaking again.
  “We’re glad to see you’re both alright, but, I don’t think we’ve been exactly great hosts. You both have gotta be hungry- I know the last thing you two seem to want is help, but..We’d be happy to help you however we can.  We can go get you fresh, real food. Or- you both come with us, and we take you to our central area, the Cowmercial district.”
  Tommy stared blankly at Grian for a moment, brows knitted together in bewilderment. “The… Cow..merical district?” He’d repeat, squinting.
  Grian snickered, nodding. “Yeah! The name just stuck. It’s our shopping district. We have a bakery- it’s never, ever too early for cake. There’s Doc’s shop, but that’s all villager-bought, if it’s the rare occasion that it’s stocked at all- so the Bakery may be the only option, for today.” He glanced back at Stress, who nodded in agreement.
  “Only if you’d want to,” Stress would interject. “Either of us could come bring you food here- but, we figured you might want to just..Get out. You’re allowed to leave here whenever you want- but, navigating our server by yourself, for the first time? Not the easiest.”
  The two teens glanced towards eachother. Tubbo looked like they were practically buzzing in place, at the idea of exploring the Hermits’ world. Tommy watched them for a moment, before quietly scoffing.
  “..Yeah, okay, sure- how the hell do we even get out of here though, for starters?” Tommy crossed his arms, inching closer towards Tubbo. He, for one, was really not a fan of having to fly out.
  Stress cheered excitably, pulling open her inventory. The woman promptly dropped a stack each to the two teens. “I came prepared, just in-case!” She grinned. With a swipe of her arm, the digital screen dissipated.
  “If you know how to use elytras, X already said he’s more than happy to lend out two from the back-up system. I have some to spare, as well.  But- you two never seemed the most comfortable in the air, during flight-based games.” Grian would add awkwardly, adjusting his own wings behind him. 
  Tommy didn’t pay much attention to the words- instead, he promptly threw open his inventory, gawking at the full stack of pearls. “What! I don’t think i’ve ever had this many pearls! Holy shit!” He pulled out the stack of sixteen.
  One pearl manifested in his hand, while a holographic icon hovered beside him. The pixel-image of an enderpearl, with a large 15x in the corner in white font was projected for only his vision. The blond couldn’t remember a time he had so many enderpearls.
  “Thank you! Wow- yeah, pearls aren’t really common in our server!  This- this is really nice!” They felt giddy, as they pulled their’s out as well, the action muscle-memory.
  “Well, I’m glad you two can put them to good-use, then!” She chuckled. The idle question of how can a server lack pearls skimming through her head for a moment.
  Within seconds of her saying that, Tommy had already blindly tossed one of his pearls- promptly falling down from the ceiling, and landing on the floor with a short shriek. Tubbo straightened up from the sidelines, tilting their head.
  “Tommy! What did you do?” Tubbo called out accusatorily, as they quickly popped their surrounding descriptor back on.
  “Nothing!” Tommy quickly yelled back, lunging to their feet with a stumble as they dusted themselves off.
  At the sidelines, Stress and Grian cackled, watching in lighthearted amusement. Tommy could feel his face flushed red with brief embarrassment, quickly attempting to play it off.
  “Truer answer; I was being awesome. That was what, Tubbo. Are we eating or what? I want to throw pearls and go places. And eat, that too.” He quickly turned towards the two Hermits expectantly, narrowing his eyes at them.
  Grian grinned, nodding. “Yes, yes we are! I have boats. Go ahead and pop up with your pearls, and we’ll fly out to you.” He explained briefly, pulling the boats from his inventory. The thin, digitized object manifesting in his hand. 
  Tommy turned expectantly to Tubbo. “You got this, Toob?” He tilted his head, watching his friend. Tubbo had immediately nodded vigoriously, running over towards the center of the room, the ceiling above open to the water. 
  “Yeah! I’ve got this, Big Man! No sweat!” They gave a toothy grin, shifting the enderpearl in their hand. Arching their arm back, the teen cautiously stepped back.
  Their communicator had continued reading off the details of the room into their thin earpiece,  primarily the dimensions. All they had to do was hit the wall leading up to the surface to get out. They could do that, surely.
  With a huff of effort, they chucked the pearl. They heard it  break through the under-surface of the water, and then they were submerged. Breaching the surface, they gasped for a moment. The ocean rippled, clothes heavy and soaked. They were certainly glad they had been in their casual clothes, rather than their presidential outfit.
  Within a moment, Tommy was up beside them, quietly gasping as well. The blond pushed his hair back, lightly nudging Tubbo away from the gaping hole in the water beneath them- and then Grian and Stress flew out.
  The sound from the rockets were deafened from beneath the ocean, thankfully. Only a thin trail of smoke followed them, the sight certainly unfamiliar to the fireworks the two teens had been accustomed to.
  Both Hermits had dived straight into the shallow water with a splash, before the dirty-blond dropped down two boats.
“I want to drive! Tommy, i’m driving us!” Tubbo cried out, at the sound of the wood hitting the water. Beside them, Tommy scoffed.
“Tubbo! I’m not gettin’ motion sickness! We just woke up, no way. Your idea of ‘driving’ is no one elses, my friend.” He rolled his eyes, crossing his arms as he pulled himself into the boat. Beside him, Tubbo whined.
  “C’mon, man! Nothing like a bit of motion-sickness to get the day started!” They playfully remarked. Despite that, they had already accepted their defeat, pulling up into the boat.
  Stress and Grian watched the teens carefully, with Stress laughing lightheartedly at the banter between them as she pulled herself into the boat, behind Grian.
  Grian, on the otherhand, was mostly quiet. A thin wisp of a smile was present, conveying one of bemusement. Tommy didn’t get a good look, but, he couldn’t quite pinpoint the look from Grian. He didn’t like it.
  “Alright,” The older Brit at hand started. “We’re real close. No one should be at Looky Looky At My Cookie- and it should be early enough that there aren’t any real occupants at the Cowmerical District.” He explained, turning the boat as he got a small start ahead of the teens.
  “Sure, then! That sounds g- wait, what’s that name?”
“C’mon, then!” Grian wouldn't answer Tubbo’s valid question, before boating off. Tommy quickly following behind, shouting indignantly after them.
  It certainly was odd. It felt..Comforting, here. Certainly not relaxing. The opposite of cf relaxing- Tubbo had nothing but the craving to do something. But it was..Welcoming. It was strange. They hadn’t felt so- so unbothered, since..Ever, really. They liked it.
  Tubbo wondered if it could stay this way.
  Tommy wondered what the hell they were about to get themselves into.
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youalexturnermeon · 4 years ago
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Warm Beer and Cold Women Pt. 4 (Johnny Lawrence x Reader)
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Request: Hi! I absolutely love your work and I was wondering if I could get a Cobra Kai Johnny imagine where the reader is a bartender and starts crushing on him since he’s a regular and he flirts with her all the time and she pretends to hate it but she actually loves it? by Anon
A/N: This is the fourth and final part of the request in which I really got too carried away. Anyways, I hope you are happy with the outcome. Enjoy
Warnings: badass reader, drinking, DUI, swearing, angst, fluff, suggestive writing
Wordcount: 2722
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“I’m sorry it’s so messy” Johnny said apologetically when he opened the door to his apartment for you and you curiously took a peek inside “Like I said before, my life isn’t that great right now. But since I finally got you over here which I thought would never happen because you’re such a hard nut to crack, it is actually not too bad. I’m glad you’re here.”
You laughed when he grinned at you, you could clearly see that he was getting better or maybe it was just the booze kicking in turning the switch from sad drunk to happy.
“Don’t get too comfortable with me being around. I won’t stay long.”
“But that also means that you’re staying for at least little a while.” Johnny said and heavily sat down on the couch patting the place next to him inviting you to sit down too. You happily took that invitation.
“You got me there.”
You were exhausted. The night so far was pretty intense. You felt more worn out than after a busy shift at work. The worry about Johnny didn’t vanish, you still deeply cared about how he felt, and you wanted him to feel at least a little bit better. Additionally, the ride to his apartment was stressful. You had a few drinks; you hadn’t been behind a steering wheel for at least half a year and didn’t feel very safe driving. Your heart was beating like crazy when you were blankly focusing on the road, always looking out for cops, afraid you could get pulled over whilst Johnny was dozing off with his head on your shoulder. If you would’ve gotten pulled over, it would have been you turn spending the night in a cell. You didn’t want it to go this far. But after all, you managed and could finally relax. It felt good sitting close to him, so close that your knees were touching. You threw your head back and sighed.
“Do you want another drink, or something?” Johnny sloppily asked, eyeing you with a grin from ear to ear on his face “I don’t really have much to offer but I must have another bottle of Jackie somewhere.” He was about to stand up, but you carefully pushed him back into the sofa. He didn’t object, he liked your touch. Normally, you wouldn’t say no to that, but you decided that you and above all Johnny had enough for today. Especially Johnny. You didn’t know how much he drank today but it was a lot, enough to have you laying in corner passed out for hours. And you were wondering how on earth he still managed to walk, although not steadily, and talk without slurring.
“I’m good,” you answered, “And you should probably take a break, too.”
Johnny laughed and rolled his bright blue eyes which were glistening again, showing a sign of life “C’mon, (Y/N), please don’t tell me I brought my mom home.”
“I just don’t like people who can’t link two words together anymore because they had one too many.
“So, you want to talk then?”
You shrugged; you did
“Is it Christmas already? Not only the girl of my dreams is finally sitting next to me in my apartment, but she also is finally willing to talk to me for real, after months of trying to get her to do that. Without cussing me out and no sarcastic remarks no matter what I say?”
“I can’t promise that, but yeah, basically.”
“Are you finally going to tell me something about yourself?”
You were afraid that day would come when you would have to talk about yourself to Johnny, and you sighed deeply, closing your eyes.
“That hard to do that, huh?” Johnny nudged you trying to catch your glance but your eyes remained shut. You shook your head and chuckled.
“No, it’s just, you basically know everything about me there is to know.”
“No way!”
“I swear!” “So barkeeper, slight anger issues, big mouth, living in an overpriced apartment with a crack-head…” “Next to,” you corrected him, “And he is fond of Meth rather than crack.”
“Alright, so next to a meth-head and no driver’s license anymore because of DUI a couple of months ago is really all there is to know about you?”
“Maybe if you change the anger issues with a slight drinking problem, yeah, I guess so,” you said, and it was true, trying hard not to show how much it meant to you that he remembered all the little things you let slip out over a long period of time that he spent bugging you “I’m very boring. But you know, that only means that I already opened up to you without you even noticing.” “I am absolutely honoured. But come on, you’re not boring, you’re great and there must be more to you.”
You shook your head, you hated to disappoint him, but you couldn’t think of anything more that could’ve been of interest to him.
“Besides, you promised me to tell everything about your Karate!” you blurted out as if you forgot everything, he told you today at the bar. And you instantly regretted it. He literally poured his heart out about how Karate was ruining his life. Maybe you should’ve told him that you were also the most tactless person on earth, that would’ve prepared him for unnecessary remarks and helped him to ignore your stupidity. For a second you thought, Johnny would have another nervous breakdown just like an hour ago sitting by the counter, starting the whole drama once again. Yet, surprisingly he didn’t as if he had forgotten it just like you. There was a chance you were imagining it but you though he had brightened up even more. You relaxed and you allowed the breath that you were holding since the moment the words escaped your lips, to flow again.
“What do you want to know?” Johnny asked sitting up more straight looking at you in anticipation.
“Everything.”
“That’s gonna be long but I guess I don’t mind because that only means you’re staying longer with me. And before I start, give me one more fact about you!”
“There’s nothing.” “C’mon just one more, otherwise I’m not talking!”
“Alright,” you stood up, confidentially walking over to his kitchen sink and getting yourself and him a glass of water. To hydrate and most importantly to sober him up a little and ease his upcoming hangover. You leaned against the kitchen counter and looked into the air thinking.
“I’m waiting (Y/N).”
“So one more thing about me that kinda got everything else you know rolling is that I had an abusive boyfriend whom I escaped by moving into my luxurious apartment which meant that I needed a new job. The new job was at the bar. End of my whole life story.”
“I’ll kill that freak if I ever get the chance to meet him.” Johnny exclaimed and sounded a little too serious. But you just laughed it off.
“Which finally leads us to your Karate, since I expect you to kill him with a badass Karate kick?”
Johnny nodded and started his story as soon as you sat back down.
He was talking a lot and you were happy he did because you weren’t much of a talker you rather listened. And Johnny was glad somebody was interested. And to be fair, his life was a lot more interesting than yours. You laid your head on his shoulder and just carefully followed everything he said while he nestled his cheek against you. Sometimes you asked questions and he was more than happy to answer. Everything felt natural. But after a while you noticed his voice getting raspier and quieter, he was speaking slowly struggling with finding his words. That’s when you knew that it was time to bring him to bed and to head home yourself. Softly you touched his arm and he stopped for a second.
“Hm?” he made, looking pretty confused with half-open eyes.
“You have to sleep now, Johnny.” you said smiling lazily, you were tired too. He didn’t answer, he just simply followed you when you got up and allowed yourself to give you a room tour. You opened the door to what you thought to be his bedroom and shushed him inside.
“Wow, already making yourself at home here,” he said, his voice almost a whisper “I like that.”
“Shut up, Sensei! And get into bed.”
He obeyed and lied down fully clothed, on his face a big dirty grin that you knew so well from almost every shift you ever worked, just his almost closed eyelids were different. This time you were the happiest to see it again.
“Are you getting in too, or what?” “Don’t max it out!” you said threateningly.
“Just joking.”
“You better. And now, before you drift away to dreamland, do you have a phone I can use?” “Don’t have a phone” he muttered and snuggled into his blanket.
“What?”, you gasped, “I need to call an Uber home!” You were miles away from your apartment.
“Don’t have one. Threw it away two weeks ago. You can crash here; the couch is all yours.”
And before you could object you suddenly heard flat breathing and you knew there was no other option. You sighed and took one last look at the passed-out Johnny.
“Can I at least have a shirt to sleep in?” you asked but that was pointless, he was already sound asleep. You shrugged to yourself, slipped out of your clothes and threw the first shirt you could grab over your underwear. That was not how you expected to spend the first night here, you thought when you tiptoed back to the couch, but it wasn’t too bad either.
___
When Johnny woke up the next morning the sun was already high up, it must’ve been at least mid-day. The most surprising thing wasn’t that he slept in or was finally being able to sleep at all, it was the fact that when he moved, he didn’t feel like shit. He expected to be hungover, after all he couldn’t even remember how much he drank, but he simply wasn’t, his head didn’t hurt, his joints weren’t cracking, he felt pretty much as always. This had not happened in a long time. He just was slightly dizzy as soon as he sat up in his bed. He looked down on himself, he was still wearing the dirty clothes from the night before and his face twitched into a slight grimace, he was disgusted with himself, he didn’t come home alone, and he didn’t want you to think badly of him now that he finally got you into at least liking him a bit. There was a warm feeling in his stomach when he was thinking about you, trying to remember every single detail about you from last night. And the possibility of you still being here, waiting for him to wake up, nearly made him crazy and his heart started beating faster. He would’ve been pretty bumped if you had left without saying goodbye. Yet, when he got out of bed, he noticed a pile of clothing that wasn’t his. Shorts, fishnets and a crop-top were carelessly thrown on the floor next to his bed and he gulped. That meant you were here. And if you were here, what were you wearing then?
Quickly he made his way to the living room where he expected you to be, not knowing what he would find. He tried to make as little noise as possible and as soon as he glanced over to the couch, he knew he made the right decision. Lying there, spread out on the couch, in deep sleep without a pillow or even a blanked, were you. And Johnny couldn’t help himself but stand still for a moment and watch you. You were wearing his Metallica shirt that was far too big for you and yet hugged all your curves. He couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw you like that. The shirt had slid up and you were there, almost half-naked, just in front of him. He could’ve also been the luckiest man on earth that moment. For Johnny you were the most beautiful girl he had ever seen in his entire life. You suddenly twitched in your sleep and turned over on your stomach showing your perfect ass to him. And it only got better.
Johnny shook his head and pulled himself together. You had done so much for him last night and you were continuing doing that without even realizing. He had to return that favour. And when he made that decision he rushed into the bathroom.
Never in his life was Johnny ever so quick in his actions. Whilst showering and shaving he feared to be taking too long, afraid of waking you and afraid that if he finally got out, you were long gone. But his fear was unjustified because when he rushed out, you were still on the couch, lying flat on your stomach breathing deeply and flinching in your sleep. And Johnny grinned, heart pounding too hard from excitement. He even fixed up a breakfast. And you still did not wake. You face was so peaceful and so pretty that he couldn’t stop himself from kneeling down and brushing back a loose strand of your hair from your face. The corners of your mouth twitched into a smile but suddenly you startled, eyes wide, hands clenched to fists, fists up, ready to protect yourself.
“Woah, easy there, tiger,” Johnny laughed “I see my Karate stories have stuck with you.”
Realizing it was Johnny hovering above your head you let your fists sink and stretched and yawned.  
“You smell nice,” you said smiling sleepily, ignoring what he was saying. You lifted your hand and softly stroked his cheek, Johnny leaning into your touch, “And you shaved. Fucking hell, you look good. And I probably look like shit.”
You covered your face with your hands and tried to turn away from Johnny who couldn’t take his eyes of you. He immediately grabbed you by the wrists, stopping you from turning your back, carefully pulling you back to him.
“Quiet, (Y/N),” he exclaimed which made you almost flinched, he was so dominant out of a sudden, “You are beautiful! And I could really get used to that.”
“Get used to what? Me illegally driving your drunk ass home, you passing out and me involuntarily crashing on your couch for approximately 10 hours?”
“I don’t like the way you put it.” Johnny said, still holding your wrists tightly, his face so close that his nose was almost touching yours.
“I could also get used to that,” you admitted and that was everything Johnny needed to hear. His lips came crashing down on yours and he was kissing you hard. He released your wrists from his hands only to hug your small waist while your kiss got deeper and more intimate, Johnny’s heart was pounding, he’s been waiting for that for months. You couldn’t help yourself but smile into the kiss. But you were never willing to admit that you too pictured kissing him all the damn time. Johnny pulled you even closer to him, pressing you onto his chest. When he parted his lips from yours, he was placing small kisses along your jaw, your neck, your collarbone, he couldn’t get enough of you. You were so stunning to him and you were making him crazy. Out of a sudden Johnny dragged you up onto his lap, so you were promptly straddling him, his fingers tracing down your bare thighs.
“Jesus Christ.”, you gasped, eyes closed, enjoying every single one of his touches.
“What?”, Johnny asked smirking, he was not willing to stop anymore.
“Maybe next time, I just take the bed instead of the couch as well.”
“Why don’t we try it out right now?”
Out of habit you wanted to object but Johnny already had picked you up with your legs wrapped around his hips, making the way back into the bedroom. He finally got what he wanted and you too, couldn’t be happier yourself.
You passionately kissed his lips again, “Everything you want, Sensei!”
Johnny could really get used to this.
**************************************************
Wow, look at that, it’s finally over
Thanks for reading that
Let me know what you think
Taglist: @lililolli​ @cow-smells​ (you want to be on the taglist, too? drop me a message)
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simpingovernonexistentmen · 5 years ago
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Family Meeting Pt 2
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Part 2 of Family Meeting!!!
Genre: Omegaverse, A/B/O, BNHA, Alpha Bakugo X Omega Reader
Plot: Omega Reader meets the Bakugo’s family 
Fluff, SFW, A Lot Of Cussing, Tiny Suggestive part at the end
You were in cloud nine, everything went great with your family! After your brother told your family about Katsuki protecting you, they welcomed him with open arms. Your old brother pulled you aside before you left back home that night. Telling you how proud he was of you for picking a great guy.
You had your family’s approval and, you couldn’t be happier. 
Right now, you looked over at yourself in the mirror checking on your outfit. Today you were meeting Katsuki’s family. You had on a lace short sleeve wine colored dress on, with some black heels to pull it together. You had your hair up in a classy twisted updo style with some of your hair loose to frame your face.
You suddenly felt arms wrap around your waist behind you. You smiled knowing exactly who it was. Katsuki rested his chin on your shoulder, holding you close as he stared at you through the mirror’s refection.
“You taking too long” He grumbled
You laughed lightly at his clingy nature. It was hard to imagine Bakugo being soft or, tame with anyone. Katsuki always had a aggressive attitude at the office or, in public. But you were the lucky girl to know this side of this dangerous alpha.
“I know, i’m just nervous about meeting your family. I thought it was just going to be a dinner with your parents. I didn’t expect your mom would hold a cookout with some of your family members.”
Katsuki groaned rubbing his face into your sweat gland, taking in your scent. “Trust me had i known my mother was going to pull this shit, i wouldn’t have promised to go.”
Your turned in his arms, wrapping your arms around his neck smiling up at him. “Well no backing out now. After all promise made by a Bakugo is always kept no matter what.”
Your alpha chucked at your response, pulling back to look at you with his ruby eyes. “Damn straight” Katsuki face turned serious while looking at you. “If you feel uncomfortable at any time during the party, i’ll take you home.” 
You graced him with a loving smile while leaning up to kiss his lips, “Sounds like a plan”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Ok so you knew there was going to be a few people but, you didn’t expect a crowd of people to be here. You looked around to see all of Katsuki’s close friends and, a good 20 people chatting away with each other. Everyone was gathered in the back yard of the Bakugo’s home. You smiled trying to trick your mind that everything was ok and, your skin wasn’t crawling at you to run.
“Are you fucking serious” Your heard your alpha growl out. At least you weren't the only one blind sighted.
“You’re here!” A woman with ash blonde hair and red eyes approached you with a smile on her face. She looked exactly like your alpha but, in female form! Without a doubt she was his mother.
Katsuki glared down at his mother, “Old hag what the fuck is all this?!” He growled out with bite.
Without missing a beat she, swatted your alpha on his head, “Don’t talk to your mother like that!” She growled out with a equal amount of bite. You wondered in the back of your mind if, their personality is hereditary. She then turned to you with a excited smile.
“OI! Don’t fucking hit me!” He growled out with hollowed rage. She ignored her son’s protest, focusing on you. 
“Welcome to my home, I am Bakugo,Mitsuki the mother of this loud mouth”
You smiled at her, “L/N, Y/N, it’s a pleasure to meet you” 
“I hope you don’t mind all the people. No one believed me when i told them, Katsuki had landed a girlfriend and, was actually in a serious relationship.” She laugh. 
You felt her eyes looking at you from head to toe. Her smile widened, “I have to say you certainly are a beauty that’s for sure. Anyways come on in and, enjoy the party everyone has been waiting for you two to show up.”
You took a deep breath and looked up at your alpha, who was currently sulking from his mother’s disciplinary action. “Shitty woman” He mumbled out.
You covered your mouth suppressing a laugh that wanted to come out of you. You simply hooked your arm around his, obtaining his attention. Ruby eyes meeting your E/C ones. 
“Shall we enter the battle field?” You joked after seeing most of the guests had their eyes set on you both. Katsuki’s mother wasn’t joking about you both being the main topic of this party.
Your alpha scoffed pulling you forward towards the crowd, “This is nothing close to a battle field, at least then i can blow things up.” You laughed at your alpha’s words. You already knew he would rather be fighting than dealing with ‘extras’ as he called them. 
Your eyes soften looking at him. Still the fact he was making the effort to talk to everyone and, keep his composer for you, made your heart flutter. He was the one who wanted to meet families and, here he was proving you were nothing short but, important in his life. 
After a hour or, two of meeting everyone, you were socially exhausted. You could only take so much of people doubting your beloved alpha and, his relationship with you. One of his cousin’s even joked about you being paid to be here since, there was no way anyone could handle Katsuki’s personality as he stated to everyone. You nearly lost your cool and, bit his head off. Instead you corrected him and assured him, you were indeed Katsuki’s girlfriend by choice.
You were currently resting in a lone table with empty seats while, your alpha went off to go talk to his friends. You didn’t mind in the slightest especially, when he asked you if you were ok with him leaving. Despite what people assumed about your alpha, he was actually very attentive. You watched him from afar with a soft smile setting on your lips.
You heard the chair in next to you scrap back pulling your attention to the sound. You frowned slightly seeing your alpha’s cousin occupying the seat next to you. He leaned his arm on the table propping his head up, giving you a mischievous smile. Your inner omega growled internally demanding you to tell this person to fuck off. He already insulted your alpha once today and, he was instantly on your shit list.
“Hey beautiful” He smirked at you.
It took everything inside you to not growl at him and, keep a pleasant expression. “Hello”
“Now that we are alone, let’s be honest. How much is he paying you or, are you dating him for some novelty status?”
“Excuse me” You growled out, you did not hide your venom in your tone.
“Oh did i hit a nerve” He stated with condescending tone. “Come on baby, how much is it going to cost me to get a all access pass. There is no way that second rate hero is getting all this for free.” He licked his lips, letting his scent out slightly. The smell alone was sicking to your stomach.
You had enough of this! You stood up to leave the piece of garbage but, he swiftly grabbed onto your wrist trying to pull you back. You quickly pivoted your body, slapping his face with a hard blow of your hand, making the sounds of his flesh echo loudly.
You tugged your wrist out of his hand forcefully, “Don’t ever fucking touch me! Or insult my alpha you bottom feeder!!” Rage filled you clouding your mind as your eyes narrowed in to the asshole in front of you. You didn’t even notice the attention you were gathering.
The enraged alpha looked at you with hate in his eyes, “You have some balls to hit a alpha Omega! A little bitch like you should be grateful an alpha wants to breed your sorry ass in the first place! In fact you should be begging me to breed you like the slutty omega you are!” He growled out menacingly, reaching out to grab you again. You lifted your arms to your side in battle stance ready to defend yourself.
But contact was never made because, before you knew it; the hateful alpha was crashing into the table breaking it in half from his weight and the momentum.
“WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY TO HER!?!” Your alpha yelled out with rage. You watched as Katsuki didn’t even give him the chance to speak pounding his face mercilessly with his fists. Everyone watched as your alpha lost control.
The moment you saw blood fling in the air you threw yourself onto your alpha’s back pumping out your smoothing scent to quell the rage of your alpha. 
“Katsuki, baby, I need you to calm down please. It’s ok, i’m ok. I’m not hurt” You cooed at your alpha watching him breath raggedly. When you felt you alpha relax from your voice and touch, you proceeded to get in front of his body taking his face into your hands, watching him look at you intensively. When you noticed the alpha behind you was unconscious, you deemed it safe to embrace your alpha, rubbing your scent gland against his.
You felt his chest rumble against you. After a few moment of him breathing in your scent his breathing started to even out. He pulled back from you, looking into your eyes showing you he was now in the right state of mind. 
He stood up bringing you up with him looking over you to check for any injuries. He grabbed your wrist that was previously held by the piece of trash bringing your wrist to his nose to smell the offending scent of the other alpha. He growled from the fact that someone else’s scent was on you especially the fucker who touched you. He then rubbed his scent onto your wrist as if he was cleansing you of his touch.
He glared at you for a moment, “You should have just called for me you idiot” He stated with no ill intent in his tone. 
You smiled up at your alpha, “I may not be a hero but, that doesn’t mean i can’t defend myself from a creep.”
You noticed a hand fall on Katsuki’s shoulder. The hand belonged to a middle aged man with short brown hair with a pair of black glasses. “Son go clean yourself up inside, your mother and, i will take care of things from here.”
Katsuki glanced down you which, the man noticed giving a small chuckle. “Don’t worry she will be with me until you get back” Katsuki nodded at his father, letting go of your hand heading inside not without giving you a small kiss on your forehead causing you to blush like a man mad. Now normally you wouldn’t be embarrassed by the intimacy but, he just had to do this in front of his father!
His father gave you a knowing smile, his father extended his hand towards you. You blushed placing his hand in his. 
“I know this is a late introduction but, as you probably already guess i am Katsuki’s father. Bakugo, Masaru” He stated giving you a genuine smile.
While in the background you could faintly hear Katsuki’s mother kicking the unconscious alpha on the ground while taking to someone on the phone.
“L/N, Y/N, i’m your son’s girlfriend” 
He gave a small chuckle, “I’ve know, my wife has been excited about meeting you ever since my son started talking about you." He smiled down at you, "What do you say we have of scenery and have a little dance.”
You smiled at Katuski’s father, “I would love to” How is his father so calm and collected? Maybe he was just used to his families aggresive nature. Which did no surprise you. He lead you to the patio placing his hand on your waist and, in your hand. 
“I would have greeted you earlier but, i had to keep my wife from telling our family members your were getting married to our son already. She told me as soon as she met you, she instantly knew you were a perfect for our son. I trust my wife’s instincts they’ve never been wrong.”
You laughed as you both moved effortlessly around the patio. “I don’t think i can live up to her high expectations she has of me.” 
Katsuki’s father looked down at you with a smile, “ I think you just proved how right her expectations were with that little out burst you just showed everyone.”
You blushed furiously in embarrassment, “Ahh that’s right i did do that in front of everyone didn’t i?”
He simply chuckled while, twirling you. “If it’s any consolation, i think you were astonishing and, a perfect partner for my son.” His eyes softened with the last statement. You felt your heart warm with the approval of Katsuki’s parents.
“Oi! Old man, i would like my girlfriend back now” Your alpha’s voice echoed out by you. You both stopped moving looking over at your alpha with a smile.
“That’s alright, i have my own wife to listen to my ranting” Katsuki’s father stated. “Thank you for the dance” He smiled at you one the last time before walking back to his wife’s side.
Katsuki replaced his father’s hands with his, moving you both again into a slow dance. He pulled you closer, whispering in your ear. “Don’t be falling for my dad now” 
You gave your alpha a playful glare, “I would never steal your mom’s husband, no matter how charming he is.”
Katsuki laughed moving you both as if you had practiced the dance a million times for this party. Of course you didn’t, you didn’t even know Katsuki could dance in the first place!
“It runs in the blood” He gave you a playful smirk. “And it’s also in our nature to attract beautiful spit fire women” 
You laughed lightly at his response. “I wasn’t about to let anyone talk bad about you.”
“You know, your absolutely gorgeous when your pissed off.” You laughed swatting his chest lightly.
“Really now?” You said in a sultry tone while, letting out your scent lightly.
You felt his grip tighten around your waist. His ruby eyes darkened looking down at you. “I think it’s time we leave and, have a little party of our own at home.” 
You laughed loudly as he pulled you away with him towards the exit while, Katsuki’s mother called out to him in the background. 
HERE IS THE FINAL PART FOR FAMILY MEETINGS! THANK GOD! HOPE YOU LIKED IT! LET ME KNOW! COMMENT! LIKE! SHARE!
1K notes · View notes
bloomingnono · 4 years ago
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meant it. (part 2)
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pairing: jeno x reader
genre: angst, fluff
word count: ~ 1.7 k
warnings: language (like one curse word akjds)
intro l part 1 l part 2
a/n: im so sorry for the long wait:( i wanted to make sure i did my best, and wrote something i was overall pretty content with! but here’s the second, and final part to “meant it”!! i hope you all enjoy, especially my dear 🍿anonie<3
also not me making major adjustments 5 minutes before posting💀
taglist of my loves: @luvlyjaemin @vera-liscious @lenaluvs
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Your bed felt cold. The type of cold that left your body weak. And yet again, you found yourself fighting to let sleep consume you.
You hesitantly turned to your left side, hoping that maybe, this was all just one big nightmare. That maybe when you turned around, he’d be there.
But you were only met with the other side of your bare bed; your lamp casting an amber tinge on your snow-white sheets.
Four weeks had passed since those final words had been exchanged. He had left you broken.
To say you missed him was an understatement.
You longed for the way your heartbeat quickened at his sight. You longed for the way your stomach fluttered as your name effortlessly slipped out of his lips. You longed for his touch; the way his fingers lingered against your skin.
You missed him.
But at what cost? To hear those three empty words leave his mouth?
No. Never again.
It was unfair to Jeno. But most of all, it was unfair to you.
You didn’t deserve to be told such idle lies.
Especially not from the one person you would give up your entire life for.
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Jeno was a naive soul; so sincere and trusting of what only met the eye.
Mistakes were a daily occurrence in his life; learning and growing from them as he paved his way through.
.
But the second you left, he knew he had made the biggest mistake yet.
.
On the night when everything ended, there was an inexplainable feeling of void growing within him.
He didn’t have a reason to smile, nor the energy to cry.
Unlike anything he’d ever experienced before, he felt incomplete. It left him numb.
Before he knew it, four weeks had already gone by.
Four weeks since he last held your frame in his grasp. Four weeks since he last saw the face he once fell in love with. Four weeks since he left you utterly broken.
But in those four weeks, Jeno wasn’t living. He was simply existing.
He was merely left in his world; his actions and their consequences, being his sole companion.
He knew it was unfair to continue to lie and prolong the inevitable. But, why did it feel so wrong? It was the right decision to choose... right?
‘To choose.’
It seemed like such a simple action. It was something we did on a daily basis; nearly every second of every day.
Yet it held so much influence.
Jeno had finally realized that now.
Everything in life was purely a choice.
.
Everything.
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You lie on your bed, your mind lost in all the bumps and ridges that painted your cream-colored ceiling.
It was late into the night, the moon peeking its way through the slits of your window blinds. The silence was peaceful, yet deafening.
Despite the unsettling aspects of the stillness, you’re ready for it to devour you; yearning for that feeling of tranquility that you haven’t felt in weeks.
But just as you are about to give in, you’re abruptly interrupted by frantic raps on your front door. Jostling up into a sitting position, you force yourself off your bed to check and see who was causing such a fuss.
The knocks on your door persist, not allowing for a single moment of intermission.
Apprehension quickly overtakes your body, frightened at what could possibly cause such actions to befall at this ungodly hour.
You hesitantly grab your doorknob, carefully turning it and opening the door just a fraction of the way.
You are met with a hunched figure; their hands on their knees and their hair damp with —what can only be assumed as— sweat. Their labored breathing leads you to believe they had run here, and hastily at that.
After a few short-lived seconds, you carefully try to assess the situation; fear still coursing throughout your body.
“Can I help you..?”
The figure instantly tenses at your tone, as if taken aback by the sound of your voice.
You watch in confusion as they begin to catch their breath, and stand to their full height. Straining your eyes to try and identify their face, you’re left frozen at the single feature that was recognizable even in pitch darkness.
His eyes.
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You instinctively take a step backward, distrusting your vision.
But your presumption reigns true, as the figure tentatively takes a step forward through the doorway; his face now fully illuminated by your foyer light.
.
Lee Jeno.
.
He seemed to be in a terrible state: his hair a mess from the sweat, his clothes violated by the wind, and his breaths still quite uneven.
You attempt to try and form a coherent sentence, but the words seem to die in your throat. You could only look up at him, staring blankly with your mouth hung open.
“Wha... What are you doing here...?”
“I came to see you. I needed to talk to you. Immediately.” His expression was unreadable, yet his tone held the familiar hint of desperation. “I miss you. I want— No. I need you back. Nothing in this world seems right when I’m not with you. I’m not who I am without you. I need you…”
The silence that follows is unbearable.
It takes a few moments for his words to sink in. You feel your eyebrows furrow in confusion, contorting your features into a frown.
But the confusion is quickly replaced with the dreaded feeling of anger. It swiftly fills your entire soul, kindling a flame. The one emotion you tried so hard to repress, viciously engulfs your entire body.
The words that had once died in your throat, quickly resurrect and force their way out of your mouth.
You find your voice again. However, this time, it is nothing but cold and bitter.
“Lee Jeno, I love you. I’m not ashamed to say that I’m still hopelessly in love with you, because I am. But you aren’t. And that’s why I let you go.”
The floodgates were finally opened. There was no going back.
“As much as I still loved you, and as much as it killed me to accept that you didn’t return those feelings for me anymore; I let you go. Want to know why? Because your happiness means so much more than my own. I let you go because I love you so fucking much.”
Jeno stares at you with wide eyes, unable to summon a statement that could somehow ease the pain in you eyes. “I-“
“No, listen!!” Your voice begins break, unable to keep your emotions at bay. The words flow out of your mouth quicker than your mind could process. “I wanted to blame you. I wanted to hate you and resent you so badly for everything you put me through, but I couldnt. Because I still fucking love you!!”
The last statement leaves your throat raw. But you persist.
“You really got some nerve, Lee Jeno.” You laugh humorlessly at the pure audacity, before turning back to him with a renewed flame.
“You left me absolutely shattered. And I couldn’t even hate you for it. I refuse to let you hurt me again. I refuse to watch, as the love for me floods out of your eyes again. I REFUSE!!!”
Every last bit of your energy is wasted on your final words as you scream them at the top of your lungs.
The angry tears streaming out of your eyes seem endless. Your whole body trembles with pure fury as you collapse to the floor, legs giving out beneath you.
Jeno instinctively scrambles to your side, supporting your fragile form with his own.
Too weak to fight against his hold, you allow yourself to be braced by him; the touch being all too familiar for your liking.
“Why? Why are you doing this to me?” You purposely avoid his gaze as you ask, your voice impossibly faint. You’re left completely exhausted; the anger quickly transforming into pure defeat.
There’s a moment of hesitancy. You feel the sharp intake of breath that he takes before the reply is given.
.
“I... love you.”
.
Those three words that you once adored, and now despised... Those three words that had eased all your pain, but now caused your suffering...
Those three words... were no longer hollow.
.
He meant it again.
.
A chill swiftly travels down from the top of your spine to the tip of your toes, leaving you senseless.
He promptly proceeds; the hesitancy in his tone now replaced with a new-found determination.
“I love you. And not because I have to, but because I want to.” Cold fingers gently grip your chin, tilting it up to meet his gaze. “Loving you is not merely a spark. Loving you is not lust or simple desire. Loving you is a commitment. I want to wake up every day, and choose to love you.”
There’s another moment of silence; tears of regret traveling down to drip from the point of his chin.
“I’m so sorry for... everything.” He chokes back a sob as the words get caught in his throat. “I loathe myself for being the cause of all this. I will never forgive myself for hurting you and... and I completely understand if you aren’t willing to forgive me either-“
Before he could finish, you crash your lips onto his; successfully silencing his statement. Tears continue to descend both your guys’ cheeks, unable to subside from the overwhelming sense of comfort that came with being in the others’ warmth again.
You sense a familiar arm snake around your waist, pulling you deeper into the contact. Your own arms loop around his neck, absorbing the touch that you had longed for, so intensely.
You pull away from the kiss, coming face to face with the love of your life.
.
“You have no idea how much I missed feeling those words.” The sentence is muttered, speaking to yourself more than anyone else.
But he heard them nonetheless.
.
You feel his slender fingers encase either side of your face, his cool touch sending a wave of shock throughout your body. Keeping your face steady in his hands, he slowly leans his forehead against yours.
With his eyes closed and without a single waver in his voice, the words slip out again.
.
“I love you.”
.
You soak up the comfort that alluded from such simplicity.
You know that you guys aren’t perfect. Nowhere near it.
But what mattered, was that you were in each other’s hold again.
.
.
Because you loved each other...
.
.
And you meant it.
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end.
106 notes · View notes
monsoonblooms12 · 4 years ago
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The Butterfly Effect (Ethan Ramsey x f!MC)
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Summary: The Journey from where it all began to where they are now. From a 2-minute power nap to a Miami kiss, Pooja and Ethan have come a long way. From Pooja's POV (Set in OH Bk 1 Ch 10 and contains flashbacks from OH Bk 1 Ch 1, Ch 4 and Ch 5)❤
The Butterfly Effect: Discovered by Edward Lorenz, this theory suggests that something small and insignificant, can alter situations in such a way that leads to utterly drastic changes. For example, a butterfly flaps its wings at an Amazonian Jungle and subsequently a storm ravages half of Europe. (This has to be one of my favorite theories ever🦋)
A/N: I got inspired from a dark Academia quote and here we are with 2.4K of mess. But I enjoyed providing all the fbs from Poo's POV and filling in the gaps of the unknown. And all the DbC peeps, I am trying to finish ch 8 believe me😭
Thank you so much to @jamespotterthefirst for Pre-reading! Love you🧡
If you enjoyed the story, please like it, leave a comment or reblog. Your feedback keeps me going🦋
Pairing: Ethan Ramsey X f!MC (Pooja Sharma)
Word Count: around 2.4K
Rating: General
Category: A messy mix of Fluff and Angst
Warnings: None that I found
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A grain of sand, almost imperceptible to the human eye, 2 millimetres in diameter. Just a tiny little grain of sand, a single one. One would wonder how great of an effect that could produce?
A single grain of sand, eliminated from the base of a sand sculpture, can set on fire a cascade of events that result in something as drastic as the demolition of the entire sculpture. Just a trifling 2 mm sized grain of sand.
Tufts of hair gently swayed with the swooshing ocean breeze, the very grains of sand of which her mind was thinking about slip through gaps of her toes. It's a calming atmosphere, having a Zen-like effect on her racing heart and confused reasoning.
The echoing crash of ocean tides, the hushed ruffle of her shimmering purple dress, and the pattern of her footsteps of the white sand, now silver under the enchanting moonbeams.
She could not think about bad ideas and good ideas anymore. Nor could she obliterate the delicate touch of peach lips ingrained in her mind. Everything was a lock of tangled hair, a chaotic mess in her mind.
And when you can't disentangle a mess, you just tear it off.
That was what she was doing, tearing herself away before her mind got engulfed by a cocoon of ambiguity and concealed probabilities, restricting her to get out without getting transformed into someone else.
Legs exhausted after strolling for who knows how long, Pooja sits down, not bothering about the sheet of sand fragments that adhered begrudgingly to the purple satin.
A simple motion ensues, the florid hair tie holding her brown hair strands in a ponytail, now lay in her hand, giving them the liberty to enjoy the tranquillity of the idyllic scene they found themselves in.
Relaxation. That was what she anticipated. The soothing of her racing heart, the clearing of her muddled head, the easing of her bothering thoughts.
But it never came, the relaxation she desired.
Instead, her fingers, for a reason mysterious even to her, fidgeted the diamond imitation bracelet that embellished her left wrist. A twitch unveiled a vague scar, a remembrance of an old episode entirely cleared off from her mind.
Flashback
Pooja was a Potterhead. An extreme one indeed. Sometimes the thought made her chuckle. How she despised the books once, presuming they were overrated. And then, as if a magic trick had been performed on her, she became the Maven of the Harry Potter club.
But being a Potterhead and having to live in a niche under the stairs did not go hand in hand. The room under a staircase was still a room under a staircase. And every day, her mind replayed the poem of curses to her, as if to warn her to never search for an apartment on a Facebook Group ever again.
And now she stood, waiting for the century-old toaster's ping, as sleep struck like pin-pricks on her eyelids, threatening to close them off. It was a bad day today, the phone battery drained, and she, coffee drained. And the cherry on the top? Today was the first day of her residence at the most prestigious hospital in the entire States.
Uff!
She yawned the hundredth time, sleep playing a tiring game of chess with her mind, and giving it a Check! every now and then.
I don't even know a goddamn coffee shop around in here!
Displeased grunts accompanied the thought as she took the knife and began slicing the apple she had been floundering around for quite some time.
One Slice, and Another, and Ano-
Snorr!
What an ability it was to fall asleep anywhere, in any position! What harm would a "Power Nap" of a minute or two do? Right?
AAHHH!
The scream came out in bits, first when her eyes fluttered open with the sudden pain. A pause followed when she actually looked at the source of it and after her eyes and mind registered what was happening, came the second scream.
She was getting the taste of just how profitable the power nap was.
Hurrying away, she rummaged around for a first aid box, failed to find it, trotted to her Harry Potter adobe and took out the medical goodies she had brought with her. After ransacking through it, she found the antiseptic and the swabs she was looking for. Then a faint sound came from the blinking cellular and she picked it up, not waiting for breakfast. Just as she clicked the unlock button...
HOLY SHIT!
What? How? Her mind could not register. The only thing she understood was that she was notoriously late for her first day, and now she would have to do all the running that she had avoided for all the preceding years.
Letting out another pained groan, she kicked two flowerpots on her way to the kitchen, took the toasted slices of bread, switched off the stupid piece of machinery and ran.
She was sure she would have come first in any marathon if she had run in them with the speed she was racing right now.————————————————————————
Did she know about Dolores Hudson? No, she didn't. Had she planned on telling about her to Dr Ramsey? No, she hadn't.
The two words had inadvertently slipped off her tongue, not envisioning it as an indication. But as soon as they reached his ears, it felt as if a domino had been pushed. One pushed on to the other, leading to a chain of events that had given no hints, no warnings at all.
And now she was in the NICU, chatting with the man whom she considered an idol, a role model as if they were old companions. It was an enchanting experience to see the intern-terrorizing gentleman, so ... normal.
She questioned her mind's choice of word, but she did not completely disagree. To see Dr Ramsey, sitting here with an intern, talking with her, for no particular purpose other than the fact that she decided to stay back here in contrast to any other person, who would have valued their sleep than watching over a premature baby with whom she had no connection.
When sleep muddled her thoughts, she didn't realize what she was doing. Head lowered into his shoulder in a motion that felt like a reflex embedded in the nerve cords of her spine. She missed the gentle smile, decorating the handsome face of his, as he watched her from the corner of his eye, his eyes holding an emotion unrecognizable.
Was it affection? Pride? Adoration? Or something completely different? Who knew.
But if there was something she did know after that day, it was that she felt lucky, damn lucky, for that slip of the tongue.————————————————————————
How idiotic of her the decision was, she didn't want to talk about it.
Pooja had only found herself running the way she was running now on the first day of her residence, and she had only herself, and no one else to blame.
Why did she think that giving up on the most wanted position for every medicine intern in Edenbrook for friends when every one of them participated in it was a good idea?
If only her brain comprehended her priorities appropriately, she wouldn't have to rush through roads like a person who was missing their train.
Panting, grunting, and completely tensed, she arrives at Edenbrook. Steps don't slow down until she arrives before the light beige door, huffs and puffs, not pausing for a split second. She doubted if her legs still had the power to walk or if she would have to crawl into the office.
Nah, no more embarrassment, she would not be able to bear it. With the power that remained in overworked limbs, she knocked, entered and gave her reasons for the delay. And then, by a margin of a minute, she signed the sheet, absolutely normal but still holding the power to twist her entire life in an unforeseen way.
But did she regret it? She couldn't, and she wouldn't.————————————————————————
Miami. The city of gorgeous beaches, giving the aesthetic of peach and teal life. The expensive marble-floored hotel rooms in which she found herself was unreal. Definitely not made for some random intern.
Gorgeous decorated interior, delicately manicured lawns, elegantly made fountains, all standing majestically, giving a fight to each other. She glided through the vast space, joy overcoming job as she breathed the calming salty air coming from the oceanfront, which appeared like a picture frame in front of her. She had never seen anything so perfect in her life.
It was like Ataraxia.
She preferred Mountains over Beaches. She always had, and without a doubt, she always will. But when something looks so heavenly, it would be absolute stupidity to forego the chance of visiting it, even if it contrasted her preferences.
Forgetting the not-so-pleasant interaction with Declan Nash, which appeared like a stone in her perfect day, she let her sensations delve into the delicious culinary masterpieces that melted in her mouth like wax.
All the merrymaking and socializing drained her. But the gentle talks, soft giggles that she shared with him, an extraordinary, priceless moment, seemed to charge her, rejuvenate her. A corner of her heart did hope for something to happen. But she hushed it, not wanting to spoil the casualness, the beauty of the simplicity that blew in the air between them.
It felt like existing in the setting of one of those Michael Faudet quotes, one of them particularly being emphasized by her mind.
"As our eyes meet, all-time seizes to exist. The dying second frozen like petals of red roses kissed by autumn frost."
Pooja's mind still reeled, falling freely into the void as passion and some unnamed emotion overtook them. His heart steady under the touch of her palm and hers racing under the touch of his. She would not be able to remove the unreal image from her idiot of a heart, even if she wanted to.
Sleep refused to come to her, even after calling it repeatedly. She sat up, relieving the memory, playing in front of her like a sepia movie on the silver screen. Eyes travelling around, only to fall on a bouquet kept neatly at one of the antique corner tables.
It was white lilies and purple orchids.
Pooja Sharma didn't know the language of flowers when she received them, with a tag casually signed as E. A vague tag like that did not help to know the actual sender. The man whom she kissed had a name beginning with E, the hotel she was staying in had a name beginning with E.
Hell, even the hospital she worked in had a name with the letter E.
But if she had known the language of flowers, she would have pinpointed the symbolism hidden in it.
The White Lily carrying the meaning of Purity, Sweetness while Purple Orchids a clear cut indicator of admiration and elegance.
She would have been able to tell which E had sent the delicately wrapped piece that now lay uncared for in the corner of her room.
Feelings overcrowded reason, and she found herself suffocated in the very room that seemed heavenly to her in the morning.
Slowly and silently, she walked away to find the solace which he or she could not give her, in nature.
Flashback ends
As the amaranthine ocean glistens, waves crash and the foamy water rushes to engulf her feet as she stood, hands wrapped around herself, she felt she had truly found solace. There was a spiral, an unending coil of memories, a string which, when pulled, tugged in emotions hidden in darkest corners, forgotten but related, all tied together.
It was surprising, enigmatic, how much the little brain of hers, the soft heart of hers, holds in them. A constant battle of reason and emotions ravage the tired battlefields of her body. How casually, reminiscences of a bygone day appears, flicker like the reflection in the mirror of the calm pond water, but remain clear through the ripples that spread on the surface from time to time. That's how memories work, still clear, still dear, even after passing through chaotic ripples of time.
As she reaches the end of the spiral, the helix of her thoughts, she finds herself even more astonished than she was when she reverted to the first pages of the memoirs of her stay in Boston.
It was just a minute, or a word or two. Always so insignificant.
Every ignored act added one upon another and resulted in the catastrophic mess of heartbreak and affection she found herself today.
The 2-minute Power Nap of her first day? It led to the 2-degree shift of the knife and the scar that her finger was tracing now.
That 2-degree shift led to the delay in her reaching the hospital?
It resulted in her meeting her mentor, which gave her the chance to do the thoracotomy with him, to experience how it felt when his hand enveloped hers.
Those two words that slipped as a nonchalant thought off her tongue? It was why she could know how Ethan Ramsey was, behind the tough exteriors, the short-tempered demeanour, how it felt to place her head gently on his shoulder, to wake up to his glowing face.
And that one minute past midnight, when she signed up for the challenge that would change her life? That is why she is here, hair ruffling and eyes glistening, the Leucos Moon reflecting on the glistening water, the crepuscule spread mystically around her. That is why she knew how it felt to be touched by him, kissed by him, to get lost in him.
When Edward Lorenz discovered the butterfly event, he had correlated mathematics and meteorology. Had he thought that the same butterfly effect had turned an unassuming intern's life upside down, pushed her so back in the void of circumstances that it was impossible to come back?
Just a 2-degree shift of a knife, and now she was here in Miami. Just like the unassuming butterfly's flap of wing, which now ravaged a storm through her life.
Glassy droplets make a slow trail down the curve of her cheeks and drop on the scar as if trying to meet the origin which has brought her to the coordinates of the present.
And even though she did not know what would happen in the days to come, she was happy, truly happy, for that shift of her knife and for the 2 minutes of the power nap.
For the butterfly effect of love.
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PS: Thank you so much for reading and I hope you have a great day ahead! Love, Manamee🧡.
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imaginedisish · 4 years ago
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Devil’s Advocate (Tenet) Neil x Reader
Chapter 2: I’ll Try Anything Once
A/N: Hi guys! So this sort of feels like a filler chapter, but I hope you still all enjoy it :) And ps...this chapter is based on I’ll Try Anything Once by Julian Casablancas (it’s derived from one of the Strokes’ demos I think)
Summary: You and Neil land in London to some majorly unfortunate circumstances that are too overwhelming for you to handle, but Neil is done letting you get hurt. 
Warnings: Death, guns, gunshot wounds, explosions, violence/murder (implied more or less), cursing, minor angst maybe, and yay fluff!
Word Count: 4,191
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“Hey,” A voice whispers softly; the familiar sound encourages you to lift your eyelids. “(Y/N), we’re about to land,” The voice whispers again as you feel yourself slowly rocking back and forth. You groggily open your eyes. 
The cabin of the plane is dark except for a few scattered overhead reading lights. You notice that your head is still resting against Neil’s chest as his warm hold envelopes you, keeping you pressed tightly against him. A tickle twitches in your stomach as you feel the plane drop down closer to the ground. The tickle quickly turns to terror as you remember where you’re headed. You feel your heart rapidly beat in your chest. You take a deep breath, hoping to suppress your paralyzing fears of being back out in the field. 
Neil’s calming voice grounds you. “Are you alright?” He asks, his arms tightening around you. The airplane drops some more, causing the tickle in your stomach to continue. 
“I’m not sure,” You respond honestly as you try and swallow your fear in your throat. Of course, it doesn’t work. The airplane drops again, and you pull slightly away from Neil to look out the window. Lights twinkle below you, and you can see Heathrow Airport in the near distance. 
The seat creaks a bit as Neil moves closer to you. His cheek brushes up against yours as he peers out the window. His closeness was comforting. 
Neil sighs. “I know you don’t want to be here, (Y/N),” Neil says as his right arm wraps around your shoulders again, stealing your attention away from the lights of the towns below.  “But it’s going to be okay. We’ll get in, get what we need, get rid of who we don’t, and get out.” He shoots a smirk in your direction.
The plane grows even closer to the ground but the tickles disappear, and nausea fills your stomach. “I think I’m going to be sick,” You complain. Anxiety courses through your veins, worsening your current state. 
Neil, with his arm still around your shoulders, shakes his head and pulls you away from the window. “You’re not throwing up here,” He says, chuckling a bit. “Or I’ll be doubled over with you.” You find yourself laughing too, but it’s no surprise. That’s simply what Neil does to you. He makes everything seem like it could be…
Okay. 
You were too wrapped up in thoughts of Neil to notice when the wheels of the plane came crashing on the ground. The sound of skid marks screeching against the tarmac gave way for the anxiety to settle back down into your stomach. You shudder, imagining all the things that could go wrong. All the stupid little things that could go horribly, horribly wrong.
You watch as everyone begins to stand up from their seats, walking out into the aisle and grabbing their things from the overhead compartments. Neil gives you a final squeeze before letting go and following suit with the rest of the people on the plane. You look back out the window for a second, contemplating whether or not being in Tenet is worth it at all. There’s so much danger, so much death, so much fear. 
And my own father is the enemy, You think. 
“Are you ready, love?” Neil calls, breaking you out of your thoughts. 
You shrug and stand up from the seat, hunching over ever so slightly as to not smack your head against the ceiling. “I don’t think I’ll ever be, so I might as well just jump without looking, right?” 
Neil smiles sadly, almost as if to apologize. “Then I’ll be ready for you, and I’ll catch you when you fall.” 
Your heart flutters in your chest at his reassurance, despite the sardonic nature of your comment. “Neil I-,” You say, carefully stepping out into the aisle. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”
“Don’t thank me,” Neil starts, seemingly minimizing his ability to change your entire mood. “This is what friends are for.”
Right, friends. 
Neil guides you out of the plane and onto the bridge. After a short walk, you enter the airport. 
It’s a ghost town. Some people are sleeping, slumped over in uncomfortable, stiff chairs waiting for their flight. You had forgotten that the time had changed. You look down at your phone to see that your New York time zone has already been switched to London’s. 
3:56 AM
It only takes a few shuffles out to the main concourse for you to recognize how exhausted you are in spite of your ability to sleep on the plane. After all, that had been the most sleep you had gotten since the…accident. 
You and Neil walk in silence for a while. It isn’t an awkward silence. It’s the comfortable, relaxing kind. It’s the kind of silence shared by two people who don’t need to talk to share how much they enjoy the other’s company. You take in all the shops and food stores as an attempt to keep yourself distracted from the terror of the mission. 
You step onto an escalator, and your attention finally lands on Neil’s face. You had studied it a million times, as odd as that sounds, but you couldn’t help it. You liked looking at him. You liked getting confirmation that he was in fact real and was in fact with you. 
“Hey,” You finally speak up. “Aren’t we in your hometown now?”
You watch as Neil’s cheeks lift and the corners of his mouth turn up. “Yeah,” He says back. “I guess we are.” His eyes rest on yours for a second before they flicker down to your lips. It catches you off guard, but the moment is gone just as soon as it begins as you’re forced to step off the escalator. You enter the baggage claim area and head straight towards the exit of the airport. 
Conveniently waiting outside the doors is a black town car. You look to Neil, making sure it’s the right one. Neil nods, silently confirming that this is a part of the plan. You open the door and plop onto the seat. You hear Neil open and close the trunk before he takes his spot next to you in the car. 
“We live in a twilight world,” Neil says. But there’s no answer. 
You clear your throat nervously, reaching underneath your black, baggy, menswear dress pants, clutching onto the small revolver tied against your calf. “He said, we live in a twilight world.” 
There’s no answer again. You take the revolver out, aiming it at the man. You look over at Neil and notice that his shirt is undone; he had already taken his gun out. He always kept it under his shirt, attached to his chest. He hunches over, slowly moving towards the man through the center console. 
The man’s hat is titled over his forehead. Neil takes it off. 
Neil parts his lips. “Fuck,” His voice is shallow. “He’s dead. He’s got a bullet in the center of his forehead,” There’s a panic in Neil’s voice.  He looks up to the windshield, and you follow his gaze. There’s no point of entry, no shattered glass. 
“So someone else has already been here,” You remark. Neil’s eyes widen as he moves the man’s shirt over a bit. 
That’s when the light beeping noise starts. 
“SHIT!” Neil screams. “Get out of the car! NOW!” He opens the door on your side of the car and practically shoves you out. You stumble, barely able to catch your balance when your feet hit the ground. Neil sprints to the trunk, opening it up and grabbing the luggage. 
You follow behind him, tugging on his arm, trying to pull him away. “The luggage, really?” You shout in disbelief. 
Neil secures both bags in his right hand, and grabs your wrist with his left. You both break out into a sprint. “We need to take cover,” Neil says in between breaths, his eyes frantically searching around the taxi area. “Do you see-,”
BOOM!
“FUCK!” Neil yells, practically tripping over his feet as the concrete vibrates violently below. He catches his balance just before he can face plant into the ground.
The car explodes behind you. The heat of the flames radiate on your back. You don’t dare look behind you; you keep running. 
You and Neil finally reach a parking lot, and stop for a break.
“What the hell was that?” You whisper, angrily grabbing Neil by the collar and bringing him in between two minivans for cover, just in case anyone had followed you or was planning to attack. 
Neil grabs your waist in return, brining you even closer to him. Your breath hitches in your throat as you realize how close you are to him. “They must know we’re here,” Neil says. His eyes are still wide and his breathing is still heavy. 
“And the suitcases?” You question with heavy concern, and even frustration, in your voice. “Do you not have firefighters come into your elementary schools in England? Do you not get taught that stuff can be replaced and human beings can’t be?” Your whisper turns into more of an angry shout. 
Neil shakes his head in disapproval. “There are explosives in my suitcase, (Y/N). If they detonated we would be dead,” He says, panic still evident in his voice, and a bit of anger as well. 
You nod, loosening your grip on his collar. “I’m sorry I just,” You pause, knowing full well what had just come over you. “I just didn’t want anything to happen to you, that’s all.” You feel your eyes becoming glossy. This was the very thing you were afraid of. You were almost blown to bits, and worse than that, Neil could’ve died. The mission was already failing, and it hadn’t even truly started yet.
You shut your eyes tightly, and a few tears roll down your cheeks.
Neil swallows hard, his arms still resting on your waist. “No, I’m sorry. You didn’t know. I shouldn’t have jumped down your throat like that.” Neil pulls you into an embrace. 
“It’s okay,” You mumble quietly into his chest.
You let him hold you in silence for a few moments. You needed to process things. You needed to ground yourself. You needed this second with Neil. 
You feel yourself dozing off a bit in Neil’s arms. Visions of a bed with a plush comforter and satin sheets play over in your head. It had to be almost 4:30 in the morning at this point. 
“How are we going to get to the hotel?” You ask, longing for a good night’s sleep. “And what if they know what hotel we’re staying in?”
Neil pulls apart from you and reaches into his pocket to grab his phone. “I’ll call TP and figure out what we’re supposed to do.” Neil types in his passcode, presses on the screen a few times, and lifts his phone up to his ear. 
You look up into the night sky to distract yourself. The stars twinkle lightly, but there’s too much light pollution to get a good look. The cold wind nips at you roughly. You turn to face Neil. He’s pacing back and forth about twenty feet away from you. You try and tune into what he’s saying.
“They fucking know we’re here, what am I supposed to do?” The frustration in his voice is clear. He waits for a response. 
“Yeah, she’s alright I guess, but you shouldn’t have forced her out into the field this early,” He pauses again. “No I don’t care that you’re the boss, she wasn’t ready when she left this afternoon and she definitely isn’t ready now!”
Silence, and then another sentence. “No, I’m not letting my feelings get in the way, that’s not what this is.”
Feelings? 
“I mean of course it’s because I care about her, you know how I feel…” He trails off, and walks a bit farther away from you. What he says next, you can’t hear.
After a few seconds, he starts to walk back, still keeping a bit of a distance. “Alright, we’ll head over there now,” Neil looks up at you and winks, confirming that there’s some sort of plan set in place. 
Neil turns his back to you. “And I swear to God,” He whispers, thinking you can’t hear him, “If she dies, I’m going to kill you.” 
A shiver rolls down your spine at his words. You knew Neil cared about you, but you didn’t know he would threaten TP for you, even if it was just a sarcastic threat.
But this wasn’t a joke.  
“Yeah okay. Thanks,” Neil says finally. “Talk to you later.” He takes the phone away from his ear and presses the red button to hang up. He walks back over to you. You’re still overwhelmed by what Neil had said on the phone, but you push those thoughts to the back of your head.
You yawn listlessly. “So what’s going to happen?” You ask, ready to crash to the ground in exhaustion. 
Neil smiles. He picks up the luggage in his right hand again, and points to the other side of the parking lot. You notice a separate lot filled with rental cars. “TP put in a favor and we’re getting our own car. Looks like you’ll have to deal with my driving.” 
You can’t help but smile back at him. You didn’t mind Neil’s driving at all, to be honest. You felt safe when Neil drove. But then again, you felt safe with Neil no matter what he did. 
“It’s just on the other side of the lot,” Neil reassures. You roll your eyes at the thought of more walking, but you figured it may be a good time to talk about what you had just heard Neil say on the phone. 
Before you can think of something to say, Neil loops his left arm around your waist. His fingers settle on the exposed skin underneath your oversized blazer. Your nerves tingle underneath his touch, and any thoughts you had before disappear from your mind. 
After a few seconds, you force yourself to think back to the phone call. “Neil? Can I ask you something?” 
“Anything,” Neil says back, smiling down at you. 
“The phone call you just had, with TP,” You pause, trying to find the right words.
Neil shakes his head. “Whatever you heard, don’t worry about it, please. I know what I’m doing,” He pauses and pulls you closer to him. "You don’t need to worry about me. I’ll be alright. ” You’re not entirely content with his answer, but it’s enough for now. 
After a five minute walk, you finally reach the rental lot. Neil walks over to the man inside of the tiny cube shaped building. You can’t hear what he’s saying, but a set of keys are exchanged, and Neil motions for you to follow him. You begrudgingly pick up your pace to catch up with him.
“What kind of car is it?” You ask. Neil presses the panic button once, and the headlights of a black, Porsche 911 flash across your face. 
You go to get into the car, approaching the door on your left hand side, forgetting you’re now in Europe. Neil smirks at you, grabs your hand, and brings you to the other side of the car. He sets the luggage down on the ground, and opens your door, letting you slip inside. Normally, you would have a cheeky response to Neil opening the door for you, but you were too tired now. Neil grabs the luggage, and walks around the other side of the car. He opens his door and puts the luggage in the back seat. 
Neil puts the key into the ignition and starts the car. He takes out his phone, and through your blurry vision, you watch as he slides his finger around. 
“What are you doing?” You ask. Your voice is barely above a whisper and it’s filled with tiredness. “Just drive,” You order sarcastically, nudging Neil with your elbow.  Your sarcasm melts away when you remember the gravity of the situation. “What if they’re already here? What if they’re looking for us?” 
Neil puts his phone in the cupholder, and rests his hand on your thigh. “I’m just setting up the GPS and choosing some music, love,” Neil says. “Take a deep breath. TP just arranged for us to stay at a different hotel, and he has eyes and ears everywhere. We’ll be alright.”
Ten decisions shape your life,
You’ll be aware of 5 about,
7 ways to go to school,
Either you’re noticed or left out.
“I love this song,” You say, struggling to keep your eyes open. 
“I know,” Neil says. “Try to sleep, I’ll wake you up when we get there.” His voice is calming, and you almost do as he says, but you remember where you are. You wanted to look at the city. You wanted to see it before all the chaos began. You had been to London plenty of times before, but leaving the United States still excited you, even though you were rarely there at all anymore.
When I said "I can see me in your eyes,”
You said "I can see you in my pants,”
That's not just friendship that's romance too.
You like music we can dance to.
The highway goes on for a while, looking reminiscent of highways in America. Grass and trees line the black concrete. There’s no light save for a few street lamps. Each time you start to doze off, you force yourself to wake up. The feeling of Neil’s thumb drawing circles on your thigh doesn’t make it too hard. 
Sit me down,
Shut me up,
I'll calm down,
And I'll get along with you.
The trees melt into industrial areas. Car dealerships, stores, apartments, hotels. And finally, after a few more minutes, you’ve hit Central London. The lights are bright and the buildings are beautiful. 
Don't don't don't don't it's not safe no more,
I've got to see you one more time.
Neil pulls into a parking garage and finds an open spot. “We’re here,” He says, squeezing your thigh lightly. 
You unbuckle your seat belt, carefully open the door, and slide out of the car. Neil grabs the two duffle bags and gets out after you. You head inside the hotel, and Neil checks in. He grabs the keycard and ushers you into the elevator. 
The second you enter the lift, worry fills Neil’s face. His brows furrow and he shuts his eyes as he lets his head hit the wall behind him. 
“Neil?” You ask. “What’s going on?” Maybe it was the jet lag, or maybe it was the exhaustion, but you feel more confident than usual. You step towards him and grab his hands in yours.
Neil takes a deep breath. “I’m so sorry we’re here,” He says, his eyes still closed, as if he’s too guilty to face you. “I didn’t want to do the mission yet. I really wanted to wait. I know you aren’t ready yet. I just-,” 
You wrap your arms around Neil, and hold him tightly against your body. “I’ll be alright Neil, I promise.” His arms wrap around your body in response. You pull away from him slightly, your heart beating rapidly in your chest. You look up into his eyes, down to his lips, and back into his eyes again. Neil brings his face closer to yours, so close that you can feel his breath against your lips. 
“(Y/N), I need to-,” 
The conversation is interrupted by the dinging of the elevator and the giggles of a drunken couple as they step inside. 
The woman speaks up. “Sssorry for interrupting, loves,” She slurs, cackling a bit. Her boyfriend joins in and cackles with her. Neil politely smiles and nods. He picks up the luggage yet again with one hand, grabbing your wrist with the other. He pulls you outside the elevator and into the hallway. 
Your heart is still beating wildly in your chest. “Neil, you had something you needed to say?”
But the moment is over. He shakes his head. “We can talk about it some other time, I don’t want to overwhelm you. Enough has happened tonight.” Your heart sinks in your chest. Neil swallows, glancing back over towards the elevator. “And those people seemed off. We should really get inside the room.” You nod, agreeing, and allow Neil to take hold of your hand and guide you down the hall to the suite.  
You finally approach the room. 
505. 
“This is us,” Neil says, setting the luggage on the ground to swipe the keycard. The door unlocks, and Neil press down on the handle. You enter the dully lit room, and immediately flop onto the king bed. Neil smirks at you from the doorway. 
He walks inside, and you sigh in relief. “This is so nice,” You murmur, sliding your black converse off your feet. You push yourself further onto the bed so that your head rests on a pillow. 
“We should probably shower,” Neil says, crossing the room. He places the duffle bags on the desk by the window. He takes his suit jacket off. 
You chuckle. “What, like, together?” You erupt into laughter. There was something about being so unbelievably tired and jet lagged that made you a completely different person. It was like being drunk. 
Neil shakes his head and smiles widely. “If that’s what you want,” He retorts.
Oh? Is he flirting with me? He can’t be.
“I-I think I’m t-too tired for a shower a-at all,” You stutter, not sure what else to say. 
“Me too,” Neil says. He begins to undo the buttons of his white dress shirt one by one. Suddenly, his chest is completely exposed. You feel heat rising to your cheeks. 
He undoes his belt, unzips his fly, and steps out of his trousers. He’s only wearing his boxers now. You had seen him like this a million times, but it still caught you by surprise. He walks over to the other side of the bed, grabs a pillow, and drops it on the ground. He grabs the throw blanket at the edge of the bed and drops it on the ground as well.
You furrow your brows, confused by his actions. “What are you doing?” You ask. 
Neil’s blue gaze meets yours. “Setting up camp,” He jokes, sending a smile your way.
You breathe deeply, still riding out on the confidence that being sleep deprived gave you. “Why don’t you sleep in the bed with me?” 
Neil inhales sharply. “I don’t want to bother you. You’re exhausted.”
“I think I’d sleep better if you were with me, actually.” You let the words come right out, no regrets. “You make me feel safe, Neil,” You confess. 
Neil smiles and bends down, grabbing the pillow and the blanket, placing them back on the bed. He lifts the covers and slides in. You get underneath the covers too. You don’t realize how close you are to Neil until you turn onto your side to face him. 
“I’m glad I make you feel safe, (Y/N),” Neil finally responds. Your heart feels like it might burst. You and Neil had shared a bed in the past, but you had only ever been this close inside of one a handful of times before. “You have no idea how much I care about you.”
“You have no idea how much I care about you, Neil,” You say. 
Neil pushes himself up a bit, and presses a kiss against your forehead. You’re stunned. “Goodnight, (Y/N),” Neil says, and he reaches over to turn off the lamp next to his nightstand. The room goes pitch black. 
“Goodnight, Neil,” You say. Neil turns over to the other side and you do the same. You stay like that for a few minutes, before tossing and turning a few times. Seconds ago you were comfortable, and now you weren’t. 
As you laid alone in your thoughts, your anxieties all began to flood back to you. How the fuck am I going to do this? How is this mission going to turn out? This is going to be absolutely impossible. What if something happens to Neil? Your mind races with thoughts. You turn a few more times before you feel a hand on your waist. 
“I thought you were exhausted,” Neil snickers. 
“I am but-,”
Neil cuts you off. “But that doesn’t stop your mind from racing?” 
You turn around to face him. “Unfortunately, no.”
Neil wraps his arms around you, and pulls you into his bare chest. “Is this okay?” He asks. 
“Y-yes,” You stutter, pressing your face into the center of his chest. 
And finally, for the first night in over a month, you were able to sleep, nightmare free. 
So why not try it all,
If you only remember it once?
Sit me down,
Shut me up,
I'll calm down,
And I'll get along with you.
>>>>>Chapter 3
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hoekaashi · 4 years ago
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bnha bois in gray sweats p2 (900 followers event)
a/n: round 2. so i have decided that i am gonna do jjk but i also added free to the list lol. this is the last of the bnha boys and i’ll be starting with hq next! characters: dabi x reader, hawks x reader, aizawa x reader warnings: men in gray sweats, sexual implications, semi-public implications, not much actual sex happening lol
part 1 | part 3
»»————-  ————-««
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⇾ his favorite thing to do after an exhausting day/mission is just to take a shower, put on sweats, and relax ⇾ now, this fucker knows that you love seeing him in his gray sweats but honestly it’s one of the comfiest things he owns and if it also happens to get you wet, it’s a win-win for him ⇾ it’s never a new thing for him to wake up to you sucking him off or for you to end up riding him on the couch after making out with him for what feels like forever ⇾ and when that does happen, he likes to sit back and watch you work ⇾ the look in his eyes whenever the two of you make eye contact always goes straight to your core and the smirk on his face always pulled out a whine from you until he thought you had enough fun being in control for the night/morning
You were exhausted from cleaning the apartment all day. It took a lot out of you to clean up after a man who was barely even around, but when he was, it was like a tornado hit. After showering, you collapsed on the couch and flipped through the channels on the tv before settling for a show on Netflix. It wasn’t long before Dabi stumbled in through the front door, kissed your forehead while saying hello, and headed to the bathroom to shower and change. He wasn’t long, making his way into the kitchen for a beer before settling on the couch next you. Without glancing at him, you snuggled into his side and wrapped an arm around his waist while his arm rested on your shoulders. It wasn’t until you started to feel sore and changed your positions that you noticed what he was wearing. His gray sweats. You could clearly see the outline of his dick with the way he was sitting and you tried not to think about it too much as the next episode of the show started playing, but you found yourself rubbing your legs together and squeezing them to get some sort of relief. Dabi wasn’t dumb either, he could see how affected you were. It didn’t take long after that for you to give up on your resolve. Tossing the remote aside, you climbed into his lap and began kissing up his neck to his mouth. You could feel his smile against your lips as you deepened the kiss, the taste of alcohol flooding your senses. One of Dabi’s hands found its way to your ass and gave it a squeeze before he leaned forward to place his beer bottle on the coffee table. With both his hands free, he was able to fully grind your hips down onto him causing you to moan in his mouth. He pulled away as you threw your head back from the feeling of his dick rubbing against your clit, enjoying the look of bliss on your face. “You sure you want to start this doll? You might not be able to keep up with me.” 
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⇾ he knows exactly what he’s doing when he puts them on ⇾ will prance around you with or without a shirt on too but would make it look like he’s cleaning or working out and will make sure you can see him to get you hot and bothered ⇾ this little game goes on for a while because you don’t want to cave, but the patience this man has is incredible ⇾ but he doesn’t stop until he gets what he wants ⇾ so the second you show any weakness, he will pounce
It had been a full ten hours. It was the one thing you hated when Hawks had a day off. You had things you needed to do and errands to run and he insisted on doing everything with you and in those damn sweats too. In the car, his hand never left your thigh, gently caressing you and occasionally squeezing. In the apartment, he would hover around without his shirt on, claiming it was “hot”.  At this point, your underwear was completely ruined and the smallest friction against your clit was enough to make you gasp. Hawks knew this. He had known it for a while now. He was just waiting for you to cave in. You thought you might win this battle of will until Hawks came up from behind you, his hands wrapping around your waist, his face nuzzling your neck. “You’re really trying my patience today, angel,” he groaned in your ear. His hands squeezed your waist and you leaned back into his hold. He licked up the side of your neck and nibbled your ear lobe. “It’s been all day, I’m sure it’s not fun walking around in drenched underwear.” He continued to kiss and mark your neck. When he found your sensitive spot, you gasped, your hand immediately grabbing a fistful of his hair. “If we do this, I win. You made the first move.” You were breathless as he turned you around and one of his hands crept lower to squeeze your ass. His lips hovered over yours. “Deal. But I’m not going easy on you for making me wait so long.” He picked you up, his lips crashing into yours as he walked the two of you over to the bedroom.
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⇾ it doesn’t take much to get you worked up, but sometimes aizawa likes to fuck around with you ⇾ he can’t help it, it’s his inner sadist ⇾ he’s noticed your reactions to him wearing sweats before so he starts wearing them more just to work you up, especially if he’s in the mood to get his dick wet ⇾ you will never be able to get him to admit that he enjoys riling you up ⇾ but at the end of the day, you don’t care because you are thoroughly fucked out and his aftercare is amazing
You got a text from your boyfriend asking you to bring him his emergency bag. He didn’t give you a chance to question what happened but you figured you would be able to ask him once you got to the school. Aizawa wasn’t waiting for long and once you saw him, you couldn’t help but laugh. Half of his outfit had been singed off and he told you that it was because he had to stop Bakugou and Todoroki from killing Mineta. You gave him his bag and headed to his office to wait for him. No one else was there which was strange but at least it gave you the opportunity to snoop through your boyfriend’s things. “What are you doing?” Aizawa’s voice scared you since you never heard him enter the room. Placing your hand on your heart, you turned to face him but your words got caught in your throat. Maybe you should’ve looked at what he had packed away in his emergency bag because the sight on him in gray sweats and a white t-shirt was affecting you more than it should have. Seeing your reaction, Aizawa smirked. “What’s wrong kitten?” He pushed some hair out of your face behind your ear. He leaned down and licked up the side of your neck stopping under your ear. “Not here Shouta. Someone could walk in and see us.” But your body was telling him a different story. He noticed the way you squeezed your legs together and could feel your quickening pulse under his hand.  He pulled away, grabbing your hand and dragging you behind him until the two of you were standing in the middle of an empty classroom. Before you could protest, he spoke up. “The students are off campus with All Might now and won’t be back for the next three hours.” You grinned, pushing him down into the teacher’s chair and got on your knees in front of him. “Three hours? I better be limping out of here then.”
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taglist: @babydabi​, @bakugoustanaccount​, @animoozies​, @haiikyuuns​
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carnationcreation · 4 years ago
Text
Safe haven (Will Byers x reader)
Masterlist
Prompt/summary: Reader is new in town and gets trapped in the upside down with Will
Word Count: 1,988
Warnings: Kidnapping (if you can call it that), mentions of PTSD, trauma bonding, etc.
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Hawkins, Indiana was definitely a… strange town. I could never really pinpoint what made me think that but somewhere in the back of my mind that is just how I would describe it. Adjusting to a new life in a town that made me vaguely uncomfortable was not how I pictured my middle school years to finish up.
The move came as a surprise. With my dad getting a job at Hawkins lab my mom and I didn’t really have a choice but to move with him. After about a week of unpacking my mom finally got a job at the local newspaper as a secretary.
My science class was definitely interesting. Mr. Clarke was an enthusiastic teacher who really only taught to the four boys sitting up front, the rest just seemed like background characters. Everyone realized that they could get away with raising their hand only once a day and sometimes even less than that. Regardless of if the answer was correct or not Mr. Clarke would take that as participation and wouldn’t really force anyone to talk after that. Being the new kid that was amazing.
When I wasn’t at school I was either one of two places. One being at the office with my mom, or two blowing my allowance money at the arcade. Tonight was arcade night. Mom stayed late to finish up some last minute papers while I spent 2 hours playing Dig Doug and stuffing my face with chilli dogs from the concession stand. I even made the top score tonight. Before I knew it the clock finally hit 8:30 signalling closing time. I grabbed my bike off the rack and began my ride home.
The ride home was dark. My bike lamp was out so I tried to use the flashlight I kept in my bag. Riding one handed was not fun. I could feel clouds forming leaving the moisture smell in the air.
I heard something behind me and soon enough Will Byers pulled up next to me, “Hey!” he shouted, “you ride through Mirkwood?”
“What?” I shouted back.
“This road is called Mirkwood by the locals, where’s your house?”
“Just beyond the ridge, my dad works at the lab” I said, his bike lamp was now illuminating the way so I put my flashlight into my front basket.
“I didn’t even know you lived that close to me,” he smiled.
“Me neither.”
Just then Will’s lamp started flickering. We both jolted on our bikes trying to adjust to the darkness. Right as we started up the hill a tall lanky figure appeared in front of us. We both swerved to the right. We sped down a hill and into a ditch. My bike crashed into a try sending my flying onto my back. For a second I laid there trying to regain the wind that was knocked out of me.
“(Y/n)! Come on we gotta get out of here!” Will said. He pulled me to my feet and we began to run through the woods. Tripping over tree limbs and stumbling over rocks.
“My house is right over here,” he yelled.
We ran inside. Turning the lock and the deadbolt before he grabbed my hand and pulled me to the back. “Johnathan? Mom?”
His dog continued to bark. Will grabbed the phone and tried to dial 911, but a loud static sound was heard even from where I stood. I ran into the kitchen and grabbed the sharpest knife out of the block. A loud bang was heard at the front door and Will dropped the phone.
“There’s a gun out back,” Will said.
We barricaded the shed door as much as we could, Will fumbled with the rifle but soon had one in the chamber and pointing at the door. I gripped the knife so tight my knuckles went white.
A strange gurgling was heard behind us.
As we turned around, there it was.
We were gone before we could react.
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We woke up in the woods.
Not in the same woods we ran through, but I swear it was the same one just… dark. The same feeling I got in the back of my head walking through town. Random particles flew through the air. Spores? Dust?
Will groaned from beside me.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“I think so.”
From ahead was the same gurgling we heard last night.
“What do we do?” I asked.
“Run.”
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We ran.
For 2 days we ran. Breaking into gas stations and the grocery store to hide and steal food when we could. Everything tasted bland or stale. We stashed water bottles in our backpacks along with chips and granola bars. Taking turns sleeping and staying on the move.
It was terrifying.
Every single noise felt like it was my last moment alive. Every movement out of the corner of my eyes made me jump. When I could sleep it felt like I hadn’t at all. We never got a good look at that, well, thing, that took us. All we knew is that it was huge and dangerous. The tentacles tried to grab us but we dodged as much as we could.
It was so cold we would sleep in the same sleeping bag we found. Any embarrassment went out the door due to me almost getting frostbite on my toes. We took shifts sleeping when we could. I think Will let me sleep longer than our agreed time but I never said anything. It made me feel selfish.
Sometimes when we thought it was safe we would talk. Anything that came to mind we would discuss, trying to make it feel like we weren’t being hunted by a creature in a strange world we didn’t know. We talked about music, books, science, video games. Anything.
“Do you think they’re looking for us?” I asked. Will shifted so he could look down at me. My head was on his shoulder and his arm was around me. The ground was hard under us but I felt the most comfortable I could be at that moment.
“Well, I think so. My mom always tells us how she loves us more than anything, and Johnathan is the only brother I have. What about you?”
“My dad isn’t around much, my mom tries her best to make my life seem normal but it doesn’t always work out. I know she’s probably tearing up the town trying to find out where I am. Oh gosh I hope she doesn’t think I ran away.”
“Our bikes were left in the woods, I think they would’ve found them by now. How long has it been?” Will said, he stretched his right arm out to place behind his head as a pillow.
“A few days at least,” I said before I yawned loudly.
Will smiled, “Get some rest, I’ll take first watch.”
I pressed my nose towards his shoulder to hide my smile. Just as I began to drift off the words popped into my head. He’s my safe haven.
We were exhausted.
I think that was part of the creature's game. It wanted us to run and wear ourselves out so it could kill us easier. I tried to fight that theory with everything I could. I stocked energy drinks when we could find them, we made coffee one night to drink the next morning, anything we could to give us enough energy to run the next day.
But it wasn't enough.
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It finally got us.
All that running just made us fall into its trap.
Watching Will get picked up by the tentacles and dragged away from me played over in my mind. The last thing I remembered was the thing shoving some sort of gross tube down my throat. And now it just feels like I’m lucid dreaming. I saw my house, not the one in Hawkins but the one I lived in before we moved. My family was inside. I thought I was safe yet I still felt that feeling in the back of my brain. That’s when they attacked me.
The nightmares only got worse from there.
I felt myself slowly slipping away. Like a battery in my brain was slowly being drained. I fought to keep dreaming but I was getting flooded with the exhaustion and the want to give up.
Where was Will? I just wanted to be back in the sleeping bag with him. I wanted to feel his arms around me and his slow breathing in my ear.
I felt something being ripped out of me. My lungs felt like I was underwater. I felt someone pressing on my chest and I woke up coughing. I sputtered, gasped, and cried as I was lifted into someone's arms.
“(Y/n)? This is police chief Hopper. You’re safe now.”
He looked familiar. I racked my brain trying to think of where I saw him but I only had one thought on my mind. Hopper placed an oxygen mask over my face.
“Will?” I gasped out. My chest still hurt.
“He’s right here,” a woman said, she had him cradled in his arms.
I reached out to him. I needed to make sure he was still there. That this wasn’t a nightmare.
He grabbed on to my hand.
“Please don’t let go,” I sobbed.
“I promise,” he said.
And he didn’t.
Not when we were put into the car, not when we got to the hospital, not even when we were being treated. The adults just left us alone. We were put in two beds as close together as possible. At one point a doctor came in to take my vidals and tried to pull me away from him, I don’t know exactly why but I broke down. Another doctor came in and explained something about trauma bonding and PTSD.
My parents came to see me. Dad didn’t look too happy about me holding hands with a boy, but he still didn’t say anything. Apparently he quit his job at the lab.
Weeks passed by in an instant. The nightmares never stopped but they did get better. Will showed me castle Byers and we often went there after I asked him over the radio. His friends accepted the fact that I would hang around since I never wanted to be far from the Byers boy.
At one point Mike pulled me to the side, “Thank you for keeping him alive.”
“We kept each other alive.”
I never got to meet El. Which was a shame because I’d always wanted to meet a real life Jedi. But as time went on she became an afterthought. My mind stayed focussed on school and the next time I’d get to see Will again. I slowly managed to deal with my separation anxiety (as my therapist called it) and began doing my own thing most days, but I was still over at the Byers house as often as possible.
“Do you think they’ll stop?”
“Stop what?” I asked.
“The nightmares,” Will said, “Do you think they’ll stop?”
I sat the comic book I was reading down on my lap and sighed, “Maybe one day, for now I’m just so thankful that we’re alive they don’t bother me as much.”
“Can I say something?”
I looked in confusion, “You can tell me anything Will.”
“I think-” he coughed into his hand, “I think… I’m in love with you.”
I wasn’t surprised but was still left speechless. I scooted closer to him on the bed.
And we kissed.
After that, I knew there was gonna be no one else but him. No one else who will ever know what I went through, no one else who will know how I need to be held after I had a nightmare, no one else that can calm the racing thoughts I’ve had since November 6th, and no one else I would want to face the fear of something as new as relationships.
He was my safe haven.
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