#everyone interested in lesbian history should read it

[familyabolisher]

you mentioned something about knights when you were talking about Joan of arc and i was wondering if you could expand on it? or link something that shared your perspective?

a lot of what people are drawing on when they talk about eg. "butch knights" or otherwise use knights as an articulation of a particular (generally non-normative) mode of gender is located within the chivalric imaginary. broadly speaking, chivalry as a european cultural phenomenon emerged in the literature of the late crusading era, largely fermented in the chrysalis of nostalgia for christian conquest and rule of the so-termed 'holy land' in west asia; crusading, in turn, was of course a bloodthirsty practice of christian conquest leading to the slaughter of vast swathes of muslim and jewish populations—cf. for example, the rhinelands pogroms or the aftermath of the siege of jerusalem in 1099, or the siege of maarat in 1098. chivalry as a cultural construct was significantly steeped in a desire to reconcile the military practices of knights with the guidance of the church, and the paradigmatic 'chivalric knight' was one whose military prowess or whatever could be matched by his piety. we see this effort to reconcile the 'worldly' with the spiritual as a galvanising force in much of the key works of chivalric lit; chrétien de troyes' perceval being a key example, or the narrative tensions around lancelot and galahad throughout the arthurian canon. the point is: chivalry is a phenomenon loyal to medieval european christianity, and deference to a medieval imaginary is most often reactionary. (cf., for example, the weight held by nostalgia for the 'chivalric era' in the ruling class of the antebellum american south.)

in chivalry and violence in medieval europe, richard kaeuper writes against the impetus to take the romantic image of the chivalric knight (as we may find in, say, chrétien de troyes) at face value, and urges us as historians to understand instead that many of our sources on the chivalric imaginary were produced as part of a reform effort promoting this idealised cultural construct. the natural follow-on here, of course, is that a reform effort must have a particular political tempering, and—imo—a meaningful queer politic of gender should be capable of understanding and reckoning with that political tempering which continues to hold currency in the present day rather than borrowing what we like and discarding what we don't.

like…knights are a state militia, chivalry is a social relation constructed around that fact, steeped in the presumed supremacy of the church, and loyal to the primary governing power. these very vague ideas around deference to 'ladies' (drawing on a romanticisation of the ruling class, ofc) can't really be separated from their broader social setting and the relations of power that chivalry sought to articulate and affirm. in short: it's very very white and it's very very goyish.

this isn't to say that like, everyone who does this has to Stop Immediately or else they're directly endorsing the ideological thorniness that chivalry invokes, but i do think it's worth spending some time with what it is that makes these cultural histories a) hold currency in the present discourse and b) appeal specifically to a lesbian/butch/transmasc/etc. imaginary. what are we trying to integrate ourselves into and what ideological hegemons are we trying to resist, and are we succeeding? can we be more imaginative?

[also—this was a very broad overview off the top of my largely unqualified head. would recommend going away and reading more about the history of chivalry + chivalric lit + the crusades if you're interested; the kaeuper text is a good starting-point.]

[thenerdofthegroup]

See, after many rewatches here’s the thing:

To me this show is perfect. And honestly I love 90% of the final two. But I love genuinely everything… UNTIL the last 10 minutes and your hit with

“Fuck. This is all we are getting”

We aren’t getting Agatha’s story, the darkhold, anything that was basically promised. And then we have Billy being… I won’t swear because I’m already treading the line, but he’s being Billy and Agatha just goes ‘yeah I’ll help you’ without knowing anything. I fully believe she’s doing it either to get back to life or/and to find Wanda. But it doesn’t tell us that. So we don’t know. We are told almost nothing about Agatha… in Agatha’s show.

That’s my problem. The rest of it is fucking perfect. Honestly. I loved the Billy reveal SOLELY because we see Agatha being fucking incredible. She is above everyone. Yes there are people more powerful than her but she is above everyone in the game of life. She is perfect. Her kissing Rio was just pure love and forgiveness for her love. Beautiful. But I’ve described before there should have been an Agatha conversation maybe in the afterlife or on her own or with Rio to explain her emotions at the end. Because it feels like her death isn’t really the end.

But

We get to the last 10 minutes and you are really hot with ‘this is it. We aren’t… fuck’

That’s my personal problem. Geneuinly everything is pretty much perfect until you hit the last 10 minutes of content (aka when Billy goes to her house) and then it hits you… there isn’t a secret episode after explaining her, there isn’t a post credit scene. Nothing. We leave in Billy being a twat (I’m sorry but he was) and not knowing what Agatha’s feeling or almost any of her history or lore.

Yay

This show is so perfect… until then. And I hate that it ends with me so viscerally angry and upset that there is no follow up about Agatha and her history or her emotions. That it’s just about Billy and she’s going to become a side character without us ever finding out about her history the way we should have, that they were telling us we were getting throughout the show. We got more Billy backstory in those 3 years than we got of Agatha in her 100’s of years. She is so complex and… we got so little. The nick stuff and ballad twist is my favourite scenes of… well ever. I’ve cried every single time.

But there is so much more to Agatha. And we got none of it. So when I watch it back I get the duality of:

“OMG!! That makes so much sense!! Agatha’s so clever”

(Them saying something with Agatha’s backstory) “WELL WE ARE NEVER GOING TO SEE THAT ARE WE!!!! YOU FUC-“

Do yeah. Agatha all along. Perfect. Genuinely perfect, until the last 10 minutes and it hits you, that’s it.

My love for this show and Agatha goes beyond bounds. Agatha is my special interest. And I cannot bind my anger that erupts every time I finish it.

And reading everything from Jac, it’s fucking marvel. So fuck you marvel for not allowing them to show Agatha’s backstory fully because apparently it wasn’t ’important enough’ but Billy’s kissing his boyfriend in the car for 4 minutes or whatever else about him we didn’t need.

Uh I’m a bitter autistic lesbian. This is not a good combo haha

Another gift for any poor soul who got to the end

GREY HAIRED AGATHA MY BELOVED AND THE GAYEST WOMAN IN THE 30’S!!!!!

[arcticmarcy]

heyyyyy, what are you mcsm headcannons. You’re art is very cool and I’m intrigued 😋

Your*

Teehee anyway

I have a LOT i'm not getting into rn but. These are my blorbos I have a whole LIST

Mostly will be surrounded around Jesse (green suspenders ftw), Lukas and Petra since they're my favorites

To start, which is something i think should be more popular:

JESSE IS A THEATRE KID!!! You cannot convince me otherwise. That guy is dancing and singing around to the waitress soundtrack and I'm not taking no for an answer

Lukas' favorite animal is NOT an ocelot it's a serval but his idiot friends didn't care enough to put any thought into it (and servals don't exist in minecraft 😔) serval Lukas supremacy

Petra's prolly got a whole lotta scars under all those freaking layers she wears. Adventuring in the Nether, especially alone is not easy and you probably wouldn't come out of there unscathed

I'm a firm believer in Lukas was pining over Jesse for a while so he tried to not be mean to his friends but his own friends suck so bad. Aiden literally made me want to punch a hole in the wall and I left him to die in sky city <3. Lukas fell first for a while and it was bad. It was real bad. My guy was oblivious to his own feelings but Jesse was even more oblivious </3 he's a little slow in that department but they get there eventually

I'm also hopping on the gay Lukas and bi Jesse bandwagon. Petra is a lesbian, Olivia is pan and Axel is prolly straight. Idk I don't find him to be very interesting past his main arc in s1 but I haven't seen s2 yet so. NO SPOILERS!!

It's been foreshadowed before that Lukas is somewhat interested in history (Jesse makes a comment on how much he loved seeing the statues in Soren's cave and the giant library, he's so silly) when he isn't going on adventures or being a fag he's reading some kind of history book or looking at ancient artifacts he collects (like rocks <3) (can you tell im projecting) (im not trust)

Jesse can't sing for shit and neither can any of his friends. When they harmonize it's so bad it sounds astonishing - compared to Lukas who's va can sing his ass off. Angelic voice x the sound of god dying solidarity <3 (also the gorgeous brown eyes + the blue eyes that stare into your soul)

The amount of TENSION when Jesse and Lukas had that last talk before Lukas went to find his friends was so thick. I could feel it through the screen. "I'll always find my way back to you" HELLO? (ik that isnt the direct quote but its close) they shouldve kissed. Fuck you

There's just tension in general. Everyone can sense it except for them. Even Axel. Who's prolly straight or smth idk i'm working on that

Olivia is both their wingman. She confronts Lukas first and he can't deny it without looking stupid, and then Jesse starts questioning his life choices and she gets to work. It is a very long. Slow. Process. But it's worth it!!

That's all I can think of for now, tune in next time for more on the next episode of dragonball z

[genderkoolaid]

I recently listened to the Jules Gill-Peterson episode of Gender Reveal. In it, she argues that the histories of transmasc and transfem people are essentially disconnected until the 80s or so, in part because transmascs migrated to rural areas and went stealth, whereas transfems moved to cities like New York and San Francisco and formed communities. (This brief summary does not do her justice, please read the transcript or listen before responding.) What do you think of her argument? Do you have any historical records that confirm, refute, or complicate it?

So generally I agree with her. Obviously this is specifically about US history, but I agree that transmascs historically have sought isolation to stay stealth where transfems have formed a lot of communities (although thats not to say there havent also been stealth transfems in history). She does bring up transmasculinity in lesbian spaces although its very brief. I kind of wish she focused on it more because I feel like acting as though trans men who lived in stealth isolation from other queers is The transmasc historical narrative erases a lot of the complex ways transmascs lived, and lesbian spaces have always been a MAJOR part of that. Drag masculinity was one way historical transmascs could engage in transmasculinity, and also took place largely in cities & drag kings absolutely interacted with drag queens, so I don't think there wasn't any places where historical transmascs & transfems shared spaces. But she's also a transfem and it makes sense that her focus is more on transfem history & its intricacies.

Honestly I think that the idea that transmascs going stealth vs transfems finding community isn't the interesting thing here. That's whatever. What's more interesting in my opinion is the questions of

Chicken or the egg (ha): do transmascs go stealth instead of forming communities because there were no communities and therefore no awareness that others existed, or was there no community because everyone went stealth?

What is the origin of this difference between transmascs and transfems? What factors influence the difference in our histories?

Listening to modern non-western transmascs talk, I've gotten the idea that part of this comes from how women in patriarchal societies have more restrictions, and often aren't allowed to go out on their own, which limits their ability to find queer spaces and connect with other transmascs. I think there might also be something to be said about the idea that cis society may tend to react to transfems with "you should be cast out" and transmascs as "you should be fixed", but that's just an idea + it's definitely not black-and-white.

Going back to the first question, I'm inclined to believe that they lack of community/awareness came first: I think part of the reason for so many trans men going stealth is because many of them weren't aware other trans men existed, so they had a mindset of "I have to find a way to survive without being outed", whereas transfems knew other transfems existed and so their first step was "find other people like me". I imagine that's also the reason for the difference between stealth trans men and lesbian trans men: maybe people who weren't aware of lesbian spaces were more likely to go stealth, and people who were aware of lesbian spaces joined them for the same reason transfems sought out other transfems. See this quote from a Korean trans man:

"[T]here is nobody that we can really call “older generation.” In Korea FTM identification and transition only began when they learned that such a thing was possible. Before they felt like they didn’t belong in their bodies. The lack of words made it impossible for them to understand what that feeling meant. FTM trans people that are older than me, those in their 40-60s, understood their situation late. Most of them had lived their lives as lesbians until the 1990s. When the Internet started providing information, only after this began, they understood who they were and started treatment."

That's also why the transmasc community only really started after transmascs started getting widespread attention (coinciding with the rise of the Internet as well), because suddenly younger transmascs weren't either becoming butches or going stealth- they knew others existed and wanted to find them. (As a side note: I got the idea for a historical fiction story exploring the idea of some kind of "transmasc secret society", because I'm sure there was some point in history where at least a few guys found each other).

I think its important to ask these questions lest we fall into the trap of "transmascs just love their male privilege and want to preserve it and have never done anything for the trans community, unlike transfems, who are the real trans people". That ignores how transandrophobia has shaped the behavior of transmascs.

I do have another criticism: maybe she's doing this on purpose, but I feel like its extremely oversimplifying the history of how people treated crossdressing women to say that it was seen as just a cool thing. There was definitely a different attitude to the idea of women crossdressing for survival, but (and this might be kind of nit-picky but its something that gets on my nerves so humor me):

If you weren't crossdressing for survival, that was a problem. I am of the opinion that a good amount of women/"women" who would make this argument when they got caught crossdressing were doing so because "'I'm doing it to survive!" would probably get you some sympathy, but "I'm doing this cause I like it!" would get you. you know. jailed for crossdressing & labeled an invert. And there is an expectation there that, if you no longer need to do that to survive, you would stop doing it, and to insist on continuing to do that would, again, get you labeled an invert.

I just in general really really dislike hearing people say "well the patriarchy wants everyone to be a man" because No It Does Not. its similar to that post that goes "bi women are told they should be lesbians and lesbians are told they should be bi but the actual goal is for there to be no queer women at all". Cis women might be told they would be worth more if they were men, but thats another case of generalized "man" being used to erase cisness. Cis women need to be cis women (and therefore wives & mothers), thats why women/"women" are so heavily controlled. You may have cases of "father wanted a boy so he makes his daughter live as a son" but that has always been seen as abnormal or even cruel. The idea of invert women and women who crossdress as man because of their ~evil sinful desires~ is not new (One scientist estimated "that one woman in every 3,000 is the victim of this strange mania")

I think crossdressing women historically were reported on with a sense of awe partially because I think a lot of people didn't realize how easy it is to pass and so the idea of a man being secretly a woman, or vice versa, was something unbelievable (a lot of old news articles about these people I've read spent a lot of time focusing on how no one could tell and being shocked at them voting & marrying women). Also because a lot of them were only outed in death so there wasn't a living person to confront or arrest. But I think we should hesitate to take news reports that saw them as some interesting headline to mean "people thought they were cool and treated them well" (especially in situations where we only have stuff like headlines & we may not know exactly how people felt about the person). Looking through my hoard of historical trans men resources, you have stories like Augustus Baudouin, a 17 year old who was outed after being put in prison for robbery. After being placed in the women's ward, his "repugnance to appear in women's attire" was so great that he hung himself. Even if the headline called him "extraordinary", being outed ended with him dead (in a way that grimly mirrors transmasc suicide deaths today). Christine Vensettie was also arrested so he could be forced to get "treatment" for his crossdressing. Edward De Lacy Evans's story shows a bit of what "treatment" can mean (namely, medical abuse & sexual assault) and was literally put in a freak show.

This isn't to say that the violence and repulsion Western society has long held towards transfems isn't bad or anything, just that I feel like portraying the history of society's reaction to female crossdressers like this ignores a lot of complexity. Also "the patriarchy wants women to be men" is like the #1 TERF belief when it comes to trans men, so I'm always on edge whenever anyone says it or something like it because it contributes to the belief that society really is trying to influence young girls to transition. I think people, when talking about passing trans men, always focus a lot on what happens when we pass and talk far less about the consequences when we don't.

Anyways this got much longer than I initially planned lmao. In general I agree with her, she obviously knows a lot and I'm also sure this was just a snippet of her beliefs on this topic. In my opinion one of the big questions about transmasculinity to work through is that of our history, because its so easy to compare it to transfems and see how little there is in comparison. And I think, besides just wanting to know more about our history, its important to investigate this to understand more about how transandrophobia works. Erasure is one of the biggest parts of transandrophobia and exploring why our existence has been erased in the past, and how that erasure has impacted our lives, will help us fight erasure today and in the future. So I hope to see more people going past just "transmascs tended to go stealth" and examine the factors which influenced this & why, across the world, transmascs tend to be erased and isolated while transfems tend to have communities and specific terms.

[essayofthoughts]

On wastes of time

There's this recurring thing where people can't tell me what's so cool or important about this show they want me to watch or book they want me to read or podcast they want me to listen to and I know summarising is a skill, but it's also really important if you want to get people into things.

Because currently? Currently what we have drives me nuts. We get "Oh, it's gay!" or some obfuscating description that tells us nothing, or "it's so good i promise" and that isn't enough!

Okay, it's gay. I can go to AO3 for queer fic, I have queer books I know are good, podcasts, shows, etc.. I've been rereading a series where most of the main cast are from a non-human culture where queerness is normal and gender roles are flipped around. Tell me why I should care about this one. Gay is not a genre - is it horror, mystery, romance, fantasy, sci-fi? Is the queerness the whole plot or is it incidental? (Because, and I'll be honest, if the queerness is the whole plot, I will not be interested - some may! But not me.)

"read about this perfectly normal thing!" - well, obviously there's something not normal about it or else you wouldn't be writing about it. Is it an SCP kind of obsessively Normal thing in a way that's eerie and unnerving? A horror story? That could be cool. Is the weird coming from people investigating it, or around it? Does something strange happen to it? Is the thing entirely normal but it's just the setting and the story is about people around it or involved in it? I don't fucking know. You haven't told me.

Okay, so it's good. It makes you yell and feel emotions. What emotions. Why? What invokes the emotions? Why do you enjoy it? What bits stood out, what made it interesting to you? What might draw someone else in?

Back when everyone went feral over the Locked Tomb, I didn't get it. Goth Space Lesbians, okay. That's a cool art piece, maybe a stained glass window, but it's not a story.

You know what got me to read it? A post talking about the swimming pool confession.

That? That cut to the heart of messy interpersonal dynamics that indicated a lot of tension between the characters, a lot of nuance to the dynamics and things which, done right, I could find compelling. It showed history, it showed thought, it showed messy, flawed characters who still had morals and guilt and lines even they wouldn't cross within their rivalry, it showed a trust within their rivalry that they knew where they stood with each other even if that was at knifepoint. It made me curious.

I ultimately didn't really care for Locked Tomb, but that's fine. Sometimes you bounce off something, and it just wasn't my kind of jam. But that one post? That gave me a glimpse. That made me curious enough to try.

But a lot of summaries and attempts to make people start something new I've seen lately? Skip that step. Skip making people curious. Just say "HEY LOOK AT THIS" without ever giving a reason. And I get you may want to avoid spoilers, or go in blind, or avoid giving the plot away but...

What counts as spoilers? How blind should you go in? And does this give away the whole plot, or just that there is one? The kind of genre and tropes that might be in play?

If you tell people nothing, then you've given them a blank wall. It could be thin as paper - easy to step through and see what's on the other side, but if it looks like a blank wall, why would they bother? You have to provide a doorway - something they can look through, and catch a glimpse of what's on the other side. Something that makes them want to step through and see more.

You want people curious. You want people interested. You need to answer just enough questions to make them want to discover more for themselves.

If you want me to spend my time reading/watching/listening to something, then I have to know it's worth my time.

[vulturejuice]

[Image ID: A 13-panel comic which depicts two furry characters, a cougar and a stoat, in an argument about political lesbianism. It is coloured in the palette of the lesbian flag, with the cougar in pink colours and the stoat in orange colours. End ID]

This is a comic I made last December as a final project for a Communication and Sexuality class! It was super fun to get to use my OCs for a school project and the research for it was super interesting and meaningful to me as a lesbian myself.

A full transcript of the comic, as well as a list of citations, is available below the cut!

Transcript and image descriptions:

Panel 1: The cougar sits in a chair reading a book.

Panel 2: The cougar turns a page and the stoat enters the frame without the cougar noticing.

Panel 3: The stoat speaks very close to the cougar’s face, startling her. Stoat: “Whatcha readin’?” Cougar: GAH!

Panel 4: The cougar holds the book up to the camera, revealing the phrase “POLITICAL LESBIANISM” on its cover. The stoat looks at it with her hand on her chin. Cougar: Oh... I was just reading this book about POLITICAL LESBIANISM Stoat: Oh hm

Panel 5: The cougar reads from a stack of papers. The stoat puts her hand to her cheek and closes her eyes. A thought bubble comes from the stoat which depicts women standing in a circle holding hands while two men look on angrily. Stoat: That’s that thing from like the 80s, right? Where feminists thought all women should be lesbians? Cougar: Yeah, the Leeds Revolutionary Feminists put out a paper detailing as much in 1979. 

Panel 6: The cougar shrugs, holding the papers out towards the stoat. The stoat grabs for them excitedly. Cougar: Basically, anyone who associated with men was the enemy! Stoat: Hey, sounds good to me! Who needs ‘em, right?

Panel 7: The cougar puts her hands on her hips and glares at the stoat. The stoat holds the papers and frowns. Cougar: Oh, come on! Gender essentialist much? Not to mention their focus on the penis as a tool of oppression... Where does that leave pre- and non-op trans women?

Panel 8: The stoat’s eyes widen and she points at the paper. The cougar throws up one hand in exasperation. Stoat: Wait! It says here that a political lesbian is a “woman-identified woman.” Shouldn’t that include trans women? Cougar: Not what that means!

Panel 9: The cougar turns to the camera and raises her finger in the air. She pulls a new stack of papers up from outside the panel. The stoat looks between the papers she is holding and the new papers in confusion. Cougar: In their 1970 manifesto, the Radicalesbians ask that women craft our own identities by relating to each other, not men’s ideas of what we should be. They’re not really talking about gender identity the way we do today.

Panel 10: The stoat puts her hands on her hips and throws her head back, holding her papers to her side. The cougar puts out her hands in protest, and the papers she’s holding fall. Stoat: Right. I guess you think everyone was transphobic back then. Cougar: Hey, I never said that!

Panel 11: The cougar lifts up a small record and smiles down at it. The stoat glares at it as she tucks her papers under her arm. Cougar: Take the radical feminist lesbian separatist music collective, Olivia Records! They supported and even bodily defended their trans sound engineer, Sandy Stone, when her role at the collective was questioned and she was threatened with transphobic violence.

Panel 12: The stoat crosses her arms and tries to interject. The cougar keeps talking as she throws the record away behind herself. Stoat: Sure, but- Cougar: No, it’s so-called gender critical feminists who spit in the face of trans women’s contributions to our rich lesbian history. Our love of women and rejection of prescribed sex roles is what brings us together - not out hatred of men!

Panel 13: The stoat turns away from the cougar in anger. The cougar smiles and puts a hand on the stoat’s corner. Stoat: Oh, whatever! I don’t want to talk about it anymore if you’re just going to tell me I’m wrong all the time. Cougar: Look at it this way... we’re just taking part in the storied lesbian tradition of pointless arguing!

Citations

Ahmed, S. (2016). An affinity of hammers. TSQ: Transgender Studies Quarterly, 3(1-2), 22-34. https://doi.org/10.1215/23289252-3334151   

Enszer, J. R. (2016). “How to stop choking to death”: Rethinking lesbian separatism as a vibrant political theory and feminist practice. Journal of Lesbian Studies, 20(2), 180-196. https://doi.org/10.1080/10894160.2015.1083815   

Love your enemy? The debate between heterosexual feminism and political lesbianism. (1981). Onlywomen Press.

O’Donnell, K. (2019). The theological basis for trans-exclusionary radical feminist positions. In N. Banerjea, K. Browne, E. Ferreira, M. Olasik, & J. Podmore (Eds.), Lesbian feminism: Essays opposing global heteropatriarchies. Bloomsbury Academic & Professional.

Thurlow, C. (2022). From TERF to gender critical: A telling genealogy? Sexualities. Advance online publication. https://doi.org/10.1177/13634607221107827   

Weiss, P. A. (Ed.). (2018). Feminist manifestos: A global documentary reader. New York University Press.

Williams, C. (2016). Radical inclusion: Recounting the trans inclusive history of radical feminism. TSQ: Transgender Studies Quarterly, 3(1-2), 254-258. https://doi.org/10.1215/23289252-3334463

[frownyalfred]

I know everyone’s here for Dan the alpha but that ONE line from Jason makes me wonder if an omega would suit Lex just as well????

A/B/O is so fascinating, cause I read a fic with a mlm couple but they were both omegas so it was a story about a gay lesbian couple which is objectively hilarious (like the author def was writing about a wlw experience through the mlm ship)

Good question!! I hc that Lex sleeps with omegas on occasion, but deeply resents the omegaphobic term Jason called him and all of the tabloid implications/fetishizations of him with fellow omegas. I feel like he hates being reduced to nothing more than a sexual object almost more than he hates the rest of the omegaphobia.

As I've mentioned in other posts, I occasionally reference the past history Bruce and Lex share where they were often fetishized together by the press, despite both being CEOs and clearly competent omegas. I'm certain, should the media learn about Lex's involvement in their pack, those kind of stories would multiply overnight.

You're so right about a/b/o! The implications are so interesting and fun to explore. Even coming up with the omegaphobic terms Jason used took me a moment, because I wanted to be creative.

[being-kindrad]

feminist forum progress 2

Hi everyone! Updates on the feminist forum.

I added a dark mode.

I added a "Violence against women" category, with a subcategories for "Anti-kink" and "Sexual Assault & Rape"

I added a "Celebrate Women" section for celebrating women's achievements in art, literature, science & technology, history, sports, etc.

Overall, I think there is not much left to do before actually buying a domain name and some web hosting. I'd like to go over some things first, to ensure the way I am thinking of setting up the forum is still relevant to the women who have shown interest in it.

The current planned application process: once a user makes an account, they will be in an "unverified" group. Unverified members can only post in one forum, the "Applications" forum. This is where a user can make an application to apply to participate on the forum. If an applicant seems like a good fit, they will get a standard "Member" group. If an applicant seems almost like a good fit, but some parts seem uncertain, they will join the "Learner" group, which allows them to only post in another forum dedicated to Learners. This is where people who are interested in the forum can ask questions about feminist content. At some point, a Learner can reapply and become a regular member. If an applicant does not seem like a good fit, they will be rejected, stay unverified, and can reapply at a later time, if they are still interested.

One thought I had about the application process, is, I could have a poll on each application where verified members could actually take part in the process of whether an applicant should be accepted as either a member, accepted as a learner, or rejected? Idk if this would work, and it would require enough community members in the beginning to make a vote meaningful (but it would help alleviate the decisions of membership from being based solely on the opinions of admins/mods).

Here is a post for the list of application questions I have so far. Let me know your thoughts on these questions.

Here is an introductory message I have written that users would see before the "create an account page." Let me know your thoughts on this introduction.

I don't really have many advanced rules and guidelines yet. I only have basic rules like: no personal attacks/insults, no slurs, no racism/sexism/homophobia/ageism/ableism/classism. (Rules = must be followed strictly, guidelines = please try to follow, but not going to strictly result in warnings/bans, more discretionary) Let me know what kind of rules and guidelines this community you think would benefit this community.

Lesbian and bisexual women — there are currently some forums that are relevant, the "lesbian and bisexual rights" forum and the "loving women" forum (can be seen from this older post here). Would it be good to have additional forums that are more specific than just "loving women" in the Community section?

Women who deal with multiple axes of oppression — would a forum for Intersectional feminism/Intersectionality, with sub forums for (as requested) groups of intersectionality (Black women, Hispanic women, etc.) be beneficial? Idk a better way to do this, if this is wanted, or not.

Thank you for reading. 💜

[fruitzbat]

There is this bizarre mischaracterization problem with Kingsley in the CR fandom that I think shows a certain level of contempt for the character himself — and honestly, I think it’s really revealing about a troubling hallmark of conditional support of nonbinary people in real life, which I find beyond hypocritical given…well, let’s get into it.

For starters, I'm not bothering with leaving a disclaimer about how not all fans do xyz or why I think that anyone should listen to me over anyone else. We’re adults here, we should know that things are nuanced by now. I also think talking about my own qualifications here is silly and masturbatory given that this is fandom and I'm very much doing it for free along with almost everyone else, so I'm not gonna waste the space.

Getting into the exceptions and such is well beyond the scope of this post, and I frankly don't think anything I say in this will convince anyone of anything — I just need to get it out there. If any of does change your mind, great! Icing on the cake.

*eyes glowing* anyway,

Given the admittedly considerable amount of work I do relating to his character, I wade through Kingsley's character tag a lot, and in many different places. On here, on Twitter, on AO3, his tag is full to the gills of bits of people writing stories in which he steals up to a certain member of the Nein and showers them with gifts and forehead kisses and...for lack of a better term, 'Mollyisms', and lays there enraptured while they talk about their relationship with Molly — who, obviously, is him. He's called "circus man" and is unbothered by it; it's testimony to the fact that this person and Kingsley have a history that transcends silly things like death.

Thus, the general depiction of Kingsley within the fandom is one that is not unlike Molly's, if not a 1:1 replica: a fun-loving, carefree libertine whose sun often rises at a certain other member of the Nein's forehead and sets are their toenails. He's curious about his past lives, but sees minimal distinction between them and himself.

And that's utter motherfucking hogwash.

The thing is, Kingsley's not an act II of Molly. He’s arguably a very different person from Molly, and the drift in Molly’s canon and fanon depiction is an essay on its own (not to mention the shift in perception in-universe, also brilliant and fascinating in its own right).

And I sincerely want us to think about that oversight in the same vein as if there were a considerable amount of Critters making content about, say, Beauregard Lionett falling in love with a man when she's explicitly a lesbian. Like, to me, it is that dire. And I will explain why that is momentarily: once I finish talking about who he actually is, and one of the principal culprits that I blame for this schism.

"But fruitzbat," some people might cry. "But fruitzbat, we have so little to go on. He's hardly shown himself on stream and he does, in the end, come from Molly!"

To that I would reply "skill issue," because Kingsley very much has distinguished himself from his siblings. Fandoms have extrapolated way more about a character with far less in the past. I didn't live through Superwholock on this website for anyone to tell me that they can't pull a fully-fledged character out of one episode of something. With all due respect, git gud.

Kingsley is a hustler and a cutthroat. He's driven, micro-managey — like, PAINFULLY Type-A, and interested in staying alive and making a name for himself; but in contradiction with this sense of self-preservation, he’s also ready to impulsively give himself up for a greater good and/or "make new mistakes", which can be read as altruistic at its best and unhealthy and self-deprecating at its worst (a trait which he definitely shares with Molly). In commenting on his new outfit, I’ve shitposted in the past that Kingsley is frum, but it's really not that far off. He doesn't like to leave things to chance, and also strongly believes in taking care of his own — he notably takes excellent care of the Nein Heroez’s crew. He doesn't suffer fools, he's snarky (too many examples to list them all, but have a few of my favorites), and also thoughtful and analytical and a skeptic. And most of all, he’s eager to learn and curious — not just about Molly and Lucien, but in general.

He jokes about being Lucien at one point, but makes it very clear that it's not him when people in his life make that slip-up. He's also been making the point that he’s not either of them as early as the campaign finale. And within the special, too, it’s pretty unambiguous. And then there’s Taliesin himself, also making it very clear that he’s a separate animal and on top of that, that he’s an absolute fucking badass.

And as mentioned, it's true that there's overlap with some of Molly's business — he's theatrical and loves fashion, for instance. But honestly, this character has far more in common with Lucien than he does with Molly. Lucien, who spoke multiple languages and lead a mercenary group into Aeor and back multiple times. Lucien, who even the mere prospect of him being resurrected was enough to reassemble the Tombtakers. If that’s not the makings of a Plank King, I’m not sure what would be.

And here's another thing: "Kingsley came from Molly" in and of itself is a misnomer. Based on both the stream and the addendum from the Lucien novel, Kingsley is mostly the reforged soul of Lucien — Molly's soul fragment was reintegrated into the rest of Lucien's. Kingsley is what was born from that fusion. When interceding on the failed Raise Dead spell, Caduceus said "put it back...whoever it was." There's just as much potential to say that it was Lucien's soul returned to that purple body by Melora as it was Molly's.

In all candor, I think it has a good deal to do with how many vocal Molly fans wanted Widomauk to be canon or somehow endgame.

The inherent tragedy of the dynamic between Caleb and Molly is that there is a constant specter of what could have been. Neither encountered each other when they were at a point to pursue their attraction, and Molly was dead before anything could come to pass. As a passive observer, I think that this what could have been has bled into the fanon interpretation of all kinds of purple tiefling content, mostly because there's so little to analyze otherwise. One only has to glance at the tags for the Lucien novel or the Molly origin comic to see what I mean. And I think that this has also significantly impacted the fanon depiction of Kingsley.

I find that this fandom in particular has a huge problem with sacrificing characterization in the name of fanon archetypes and tropes, but due to the distinct nature of Kingsley’s character this can veer into…I mean, pretty ugly territory.

People love the reincarnated lovers trope, and I see that applied here the most, to which I always want to remind people that Kingsley is probably more like a joined Trill. He has these past lives and memories, but just like Ezri isn’t quite Jadzia isn’t quite Kurzon Dax, Kingsley isn’t Molly isn’t Lucien. Ezri didn’t hop up and get busy with Worf, even when Jadzia had been his wife. Far from it, actually. Similarly, Jadzia had an entire exploratory episode dedicated to encountering Kurzon’s spouse and deciding that she (regretfully for lesbians everywhere) felt differently.

It’s true that it’s not completely baseless; I’m genuinely not saying that. It’s true that one of the first things King did was flirt with Caleb when he woke up. And then when he’d come more into his own, there was all that wild talk they had during the…

Oh wait, that’s right. They didn’t speak one on one even once during the reunion. So the argument could easily be made that in the chunk of the stream that showed us the most about who King was as a person, he didn’t touch Caleb with a thirty-nine and a half foot pole. Meaning that at this point in time, the basis of the ship is predominately Caleb’s relationship to his elder siblings.

I don't have time and ultimately have no interest in unpacking that in terms of it being solid foundations for a romantic relationship — we all can read, baruch hashem — and will also assume that there’s content about that dynamic that explores that weirdness with all the complexity that it deserves. But my central point here is that I’m seeing vanishingly little of it, and far more of it being used in a way that denies Kingsley his own identity. The point isn't hating on a ship. Widoking in and of itself is fine, the point is that people aren't actually shipping Kingsley with Caleb. They're shipping him with someone wearing the skin of his dead older brother.

Which brings me to my next point...

I find this aspect to be incredible given the extraordinary way that this campaign explores trans identity and narrative. Plenty of other folks have written about the extent that campaign 2’s focus on identity as a theme has resulted In one of the most comprehensive studies of several different types of trans stories. Like, VETH?!?

BEAU?!?! Not to mention FJORD’S UNRELENTING T-BOY SWAG?!?!?!

And yet.

And, yes, it is that deep. Let me explain.

Molly and Lucien are canonically genderfluid. Kingsley hasn't come out as anything yet, so the jury is still out... though many people, myself included, headcanon that he's some flavor of not cis.

For me, this is because Kingsley’s narrative is arguably more a traditional trans one than Lucien or Molly's: being born with the expectation that he would be one thing, then coming to his family — who hold that expectation quite dearly — and asserting that he is someone and something else completely different from that. Lucien and Molly are trans characters, no doubt, but their stories are not about being transgender. And there is an intrinsic quality to King's that definitely is.

The notion of "trans narrative" is also something applied to someone like Nott/Veth, even in a world where transness is not stigmatized. So while transphobia is not a thing as we understand it in Exandria, that doesn't change that Kingsley “came out” and transitioned in a more recognizable way to us than Lucien or Molly ever had to — in the same light as Veth arguably struggling with her self-image in a way that many trans viewers find exceedingly familiar.

If we can apply the queer critical lens and think of Fjord being a trans guy deconstructing toxic ideas of masculinity, or of Beau being a trans girl dealing with transphobic parents that wanted a son, got one, and cast her aside, we can also use that same level of discernment when it comes to Kingsley. There's precedent.

I don’t mean to get personal here, but the flat out dismissal of Kingsley's identity as an individual and not as the sum of other parts reminds me so much of my own experience of having come out as non-binary and then telling people that I was going to start HRT. The support dried up almost immediately the minute I made it clear I wanted to switch pronouns again and pursue medical transition, though I still conceived of myself as effectively genderless.

So long as you’re fun and funky and trans in a way that isn’t obtrusive, it’s fine. Well, “fine” isn’t the right word, but people are so fucking terrified of you becoming one of “those” trans people and taking the scary hormones and changing your body and getting the surgeries. It's the cousin of that perennial TERF talking point of "why can't you just be a tomboy/effeminate gay guy". As if being a tomboy/fem guy is somehow easier, too!! But I digress. To a lot of folks, Kingsley can be whatever he wants..........so long as he doesn't reject Molly as a foundational part of him, if not the, and heaven help him if he diverges from the mold Molly left for him.

For this reason (and for other transgender reasons that I don't want to get into), that has made engaging with a lot of this faux-Kingsley content difficult. Because Kingsley came out! Kingsley has told everyone who he is and what he's about, and folks are ignoring that in favor of an interpretation that centers a different person's existence entirely. And with this coming from a group of fans that tends to trend towards being trans, too, that's quite the bitter pill.

Creatively, I firmly believe that people can do whatever they want forever. And everyone has the right to make content where their Barbies scissor. I, for one, also am 100% guilty of it in other contexts. That doesn't bother me.

What does bother me is a collective delusion where a significant chunk of the fandom, in missing their tragically dead non-binary character, effectively stuff a separate one that resembles him back into the closet without noticing the cruelty of doing so. In fact, relishing in it.

And while these people are fictional and aren't real and can't feel pain aside from what we inflict on them narratively, it gives me pause about the way this trend mirrors common transphobic behavior I have experienced as a non-binary person myself. Thus, I cannot possibly watch it happen and not feel compelled to say something about it.

In essence, Kingsley has told us time and time again who he is and what he's about. If we say as fans that we respect the narrative integrity of Campaign 2, I think it's important that we listen and honor that.

[ripaxed]

Sugar and Heather for the character ask?

Evil women <3

Sugar!

Sexuality Headcanon: Lesbian! Nothing too deep about it

Gender Headcanon: I don’t really have one? I generally default to thinking of her as a cis ally but I vibe with her being trans too.

A ship I have with said character: Skygar <3. Their team up went hard idc. Also I don’t really think about it much but her and Leonard is cute

A BROTP I have with said character: Not really a friendship but I think the alliance she offered to Shawn would’ve been interesting if he agreed. Her laughing at Max is funny also.

A NOTP I have with said character: Sometimes people would talk about her and Owen and it’s so. side eye

A random headcanon: With her making it far in Pahkitew, Sugar was offered more role in tv and commercials. Which let her eventually go to veterinary school, like how she wanted if she won the million.

General Opinion over said character: Sugar suffers from Pahkitew’s weaker writing a lot of the time, but I still really enjoy her. Her huge personality makes her a standout even in the season of zany characters. Plus I find her rather interesting, with her history in exploitive child beauty pageants resulting in her underhanded and competitive attitude and her lack of trust in others around. If Pahkitew theoretically somehow had a second season, she’d be the number one character I’d have wanted to see expanded on.

Heather!

Sexuality Headcanon: Unlabeled! I think Heather struggled to accept she was queer for a long time, in part because no label felt “like her”. Finding out she didn’t have to fit into any particular box made it easier for her to understand herself.

Gender Headcanon: Transmasc. I have. many thoughts about this hc that I should save for it’s own post. But I first thought of it when I started to read the line “I’m the good guy?” as equating to gender euphoria and Heather being tied to being labeled a villain as she is to being labeled a girl.

A ship I have with said character: Ah Sceather, the crackship made as an inside joke that I turned unironic and I am obsessed with. Outside of that, Aleheather is so good. Genuinely just a fantastic canon ship and the backbone of World Tour. I also really really like Gweather and H-bombs.

A BROTP I have with said character: Her and Harold again! They work super well together both platonically and romantically to me.

A NOTP I have with said character: Uhh, I guess I’m not a fan of her and Courtney? Not in the sense I hate it I am just incredibly indifferent to it. Shearing sheeps pops off tho

A random headcanon: I hc they work as a union negotiator in adulthood! Based on that scene in action about her knowing union rules and wanting to organize against Chris

General Opinion over said character: Heather <3. A favorite character easily and forever. I’m obsessed with her. I think she’s under appreciated in Island. She’s not very complex but she brings such an energy that almost all of her scenes are entertaining. Also season one would be impossibly dull without her srry </3. She’s so good in the Island special where her confidence is totally shattered. In Action not only do we see her at her most pathetic /pos but also at some of her funniest. I love you bald Heather <3. In World Tour, well, what can I even say that someone else hasn’t. She’s at her peak, she’s funny, she’s completely hated but manages to scrap her way to finale, and she’s the best winner of any gen 1 season by a mile. Her history of unpopularity and horrible parents and being rejected by everyone around her it just- I love her. Heather sweep.

[ggtess]

I’ve been a fan of Hozier since I heard his song take me to church. Its intense religious scrutiny tied with its beautiful queer allusions roped me in instantly. It didn’t take me long to discover how talented this artist was, and how deep of an impact his music would have on me. He’s been a favorite ever since.

Following a steady increase of my love for Hozier, was a fast and intense love for the Inferno of Dante, a book that I was originally begrudgingly forced to read. I had already watched a youtube series on the comedia and figured that’s all I would really need from this story (sooo fucking embarrassing). But, as we delved deeper into the inferno and all the rich history associated with it, my english-subject-loving-brain was absolutely enamored. There was so much to digest and speculate and criticize and praise. I was in Heaven (haha).

Now obviously some months have passed since the release of this album, but I only recently discovered that Unreal Unearth featured the marriage of these two beloved interests of mine.

With all that being said, here’s are my incredibly belated, partially sincere and partially bullshit thoughts on Hozier’s Unreal Unearth:

De Shelby pt 1- (7/10) gorgeous guitar brought to us by a gorgeous Irish man. Desolate, chilling, sullen.

De Shelby pt 2- (7/10) absolutely insane transition. This bass is so catchy and rhythmic, really fun. I assume this is representative of the harsh descent into hell, running/hiding from the atonement of sins: throwing yourself into what is ungodly to avoid isolation.

First time- (8/10) this just sounds so fucking good, “some part of me must have died the first time that you called me ‘baby’ and some part of me came alive the first time that you called me ‘baby’” is so stark and relatable. God that is an absolutely devastating way to look at bouquets. A quick ode to the lost “remembering again/ the full extent of what forever is” because fuck. This is confusing and heart wrenching, a lover mourning his lost love and worshiping them all the same because they’re all he has in this eternity, this limbo leaves him lost and all he sees and all he knows is death, even through the kind gestures of flowers on his grave, desperate and lost

Francesca- (9/10) The first direct reference to the inferno via the storms of lust in the first circle. Listening has me confusing lust with love- is lust just an extension of love ?? Because this is a damn love song. “Heaven is not fit to house a love like you and I” oh my fucking god yeah this is the favorite. Does Hozier know that he’s a lesbian or should I tell him

I, Carrion- (8/10) so, so beautiful. Consumed in consumption itself, prioritizing pleasure over what is right and moral. So many references in this one- the turtles holding up the world, Icarus flying and falling, atlas carrying the weightless feeling he is experiencing.

Eat your young- (8/10) this song is popular for a reason. Obviously representing gluttony, the lyrics are so disgusting and immoral, hungry for more wealth, more gain, more, more. Criticism to world leaders, criticism to capitalism, criticism to consumerism, criticism to those who take and take. “Eat your young” stealing the future of your youth, decimating the climate, sending your children to war, sending your children to sweep chimneys, all exploitation, all eating your young. Also head ???

Damage gets done- (7/10) everyone move this song is so upbeat I need to fucking dance. Brandi has a really powerful voice that complements hozier’s so well. For something being representative of greed, this song is pretty damn grateful, at least on my first impression. In a pessimistic perspective, it could be the oblivion of the youth to their damage on the earth. Just by existing in the world we live in we leave an irreversible mark on our climate, our environment, our wildlife, etc. Unknowingly, we’re greedy to want to thrive in our world in any capacity but specifically financially. Maybe the best of us are our youth that don’t want for more than they have. This song contrasts the previous one HARSHLY.

Who we are- (6/10) this song is a headache. Juxtaposing the deeply frustrating lyrics of navigating the dark, burning out, chasing mindlessly and the loud singing filled with a sense of catharsis and relief is sooo mind boggling. So much uncertainty and passion.

Son of Nyx- (7/10) god I love a transition track. So dejected and beautiful at the same time. These themes of loss are just constant throughout the album. Someone tell me how Hozier did all this world building without any words? I would have genuinely guessed that the river Styx is what’s being represented by this instrumental, he captured it exactly how I imagined.

All things end- (6/10) This is definitely akin to gospel music. Hozier’s influence from black artists is rich in this song, really fun listen. Also deeply ironic to use this style of music to write a song about heresy. Reminds me of his iconic take me to church.

Continued in next post ! :-)

[infatuate]

9 book recs meme! tagged by @roobylavender; ty faatima <3333. this ended up being longer than i wanted it to be but oh well

the bloody chamber & other stories - angela carter

angela carter quotes get circulated out of context on this site every 2-3 business days but i really do think everyone should tap into the bloody chamber at least once. i have written many a paper on this book & each time i uncovered some new aspect i had previously overlooked but which carter hadn't. i'm not sure what i could say about it that hasn't already been said; this is one of the best fairytale anthologies out there, period. not to mention, those quotes are so much better in context.

decreation: poetry, essays, opera - anne carson

the first book of carson's essays/poetry i ever read cover to cover after crashing against plainwater hard when i was like 16. decreation is very aptly named - it's disjointed & deconstructed & more than a little strange, moving from subject to subject, essay to poem to play to opera and back again, but it managed to capture my attention the way none of carson's other works did. decreation is a journey through the self (through sleep & the subconscious, the spirit & God) that doesn't really arrive anywhere but is worth reading for the journey. aside from showing me just what could be done with form, it also introduced to me to marguerite porete, who became my own personal medieval mystic-martyr special interest. i've since read a lot of carson, but i still think decreation is her most interesting (& maybe underrated?) work.

violence & the sacred - rene girard

a solid 75% of my essays in my last two years of undergrad used this text as scaffolding of some sort. even when i wasn't writing about violence, sacrifice, or mimesis, i was thinking about it. this is a dense book of theory that flies by because everything girard is saying is simultaneously insane & so so compelling. other people have if you're interested in rituals, the societal function of violence, the origins of the word scapegoat, or you just want to find a new jumping off point for your own thoughts on any of these topics, i think you would find violence & the sacred a really fascinating text.

the children of húrin - j.r.r. tolkien

i read the children of húrin directly after reading the hobbit at age 14; i wanted another 'short' 'standalone' tolkien book to read before diving into the lord of the rings or the silmarillion. (i clearly did not know anything about tolkien at this point in my life.) but i don't regret it at all, because it's probably the best thing he's ever written. CoH is, for the most part, about the tragic life of túrin son of húrin & how the curse on his family dooms him & everyone he crosses paths with. the tighter focus on túrin's various fuck-ups and miseries is more intimate, more detailed, and more character-driven unlike a lot of tolkien's first age work. it's also the darkest thing tolkien's written, in my opinion; this is his longest most extended greek tragedy moment & he leans into it 100%. hubris, unintentional incest, accidental murder, suicide - the children of húrin has it all. túrin turambar you will always be famous!

a master of djinn - p. djeli clark

this is my favorite new fantasy read of the last couple of years. i went into thinking i wouldn't like it at all—it's set in an edwardian-era alternate history magical steampunk cairo, for one—but clark's writing is incredibly immersive. he's very skilled at reimagining history in a way that both makes perfect sense & is wildly inventive. i thought some of its critiques of colonialism were a little shallow but otherwise it was fun. and lesbian! the main character is a dapper muslim butch, and while i'm not usually a 'representation for its own sake' kind of person, i couldn't help but be obsessed with fatma. it helps that it has a more refined perspective on islam compared to virtually any other muslim/arab fantasy novel i've ever read (this is not a high bar). a master of djinn comes with not one, but two short stories set in the same universe, so you can check out clark's writing for free & see how you like it.

as meat loves salt - maria mccann

this one was recommended to me by a twitter mutual almost 2 years ago and i haven't reread it since, but i think about it frequently anyways. it's a historical fiction novel set during the english civil war, following jacob cullen, a man initially of gentle birth who becomes a servant who becomes a soldier in the parliamentary army. characterizing it beyond that gets tricky; how do you properly describe the completely insane depths of rage, lust, love, & obsession that mccann plumbs? as meat loves salt is for the hannigram girls, the heathcliff/cathy girls, the girls who enjoy devotion & obsession going hand in unlovable hand. major tws for rape & violence, & i don't think i could read it again unless i was in the right headspace, but this one is really good.

ship of magic - robin hobb

i could have put any robin hobb book here, because i do think everyone should read robin hobb at least once. especially if you have even a passing interest in fantasy. ship of magic made the final cut because it's the perfect beginning for anyone who might be turned off by the slow character study that is the farseer trilogy. liveship traders is more fast-paced with a rotating cast of v unique characters and the best villain she's ever put to paper. it has talking ships, terrible parenting even for a fantasy book, representation for awful horrible teenage girls with no redeeming qualities whatsoever, & a truly original take on dragons.

beowulf: a new verse translation - seamus heaney

when i decided to minor in medieval studies, beowulf was at least 60% of the reason. i read the r.m. liuzza broadview translation for class (which i love, to be clear), but my prof recommended that we go read heaney's translation anyways, because it's both a good translation of beowulf & an exercise in poetic brilliance. to me, heaney's beowulf feels less like a translation & more like a free-verse poem he wrote while possessed by the spirit of a 7th century scop. i know there are better, more accurate/faithful translations, but this one has a spirit to it that's difficult to find elsewhere. honestly it's worth reading for the introduction alone.

the fortune men - nadifa mohamed

my token contemporary non-fiction fiction novel of the past couple of years. i'm always rooting for everyone somali but also? nadifa mohamed is just a great writer. this novel is set in 1950s cardiff, wales, and dramatizes the true story of mahmood hussein mattan, a somali man who was wrongfully executed for the murder of lily volpert. mohamed approaches the events with so much empathy for both victims and the extensive research she did shines through at every moment. the consistency and conviction and clarity of her writing will convince you that, even if you don't know anything about the city or the time period or the events unfolding, she definitely does. she was kinda robbed for the booker but that's just my opinion.

tagging @derelictship; @misericordae; @hesitationss; @yevrosima-the-third; @gawayne; @butchniqabi & anyone else who wants to do it!

[marcilled]

According to the votes on that poll, at least 70% of you want to hear about my FFXIV ocs (meanwhile, only 12% think i should sleep. so i'm awake still, typing this.) I'll ramble about them under the cut, but for the ~7% that said they don't know what ffxiv is, I ended up rambling quite a bit about what ffxiv even is, and why I personally enjoy it/what i recommend for anyone who's interested in it. (I made it easy to skip over if you don't care to read about that, though)

Gonna put this under a readmore since it got really long;

Cassern Qestir! my main girlie. she/it pronouns. lesbian .

she's the warrior of light. if you don't know what that means; it's the protagonist. if you still need more context:

(skip to the blue text if you don't want to read me explain ffxiv and why i think it's worth playing, i didn't expect to ramble this much about it...)

Final Fantasy XIV is a MMORPG by Square Enix. Most other final fantasy games aren't MMOs, but this one is. That means it's a multiplayer game with RPG elements. It's also heavily story-driven. While you might hear people complain about the story at times- and I'd be one of them- it manages to really leave an impression in spite of any contrivances, awkward writing, or plotholes. That's due to the fact that the player character is... well, whoever you want them to be.

Your WoL (Warrior of Light), the player character, is the protagonist of the story. And it really must be emphasized... They are so, so fully the protagonist, it's hard for other protagonists to even compare to the protagonist energy the warrior of light has. That might seem... dull or uninteresting to some, but eh, it's not like you can please everyone- the point is for you to get into character, and if that doesn't interest you, then hopefully the other characters in the story will. Personally I love this aspect- I've made the WoL my own oc with a really, really detailed backstory. Which brings me to my next point;

The Worldbuilding... The worldbuilding is probably the strongest point of ffxiv, aside from the STELLAR soundtrack it boasts. The worldbuilding is incredibly detailed, and is there to encourage roleplaying, as well as to help the plot along (tho, really, it works best as a means to encourage roleplay). I suppose I should be more specific here; it's the setting that's really the key point here- the world, the cities, each and every river and valley... But also the time period, the history, etc etc etc... There's a lot of material to work with, and I suppose you'll just have to believe me that it's really quite in-depth (if you're interested in that depth! totally fine not to engage with it, too.)

All of this isn't... going to grab or interest everyone, certainly, but eh, I've accepted that at this point lol. Don't force yourself to keep playing it if it isn't grabbing you, but for me, I started playing it for the social aspect- doing something in the game with friends, socializing in the game, making new friends through it... it's been great for that. What I didn't expect is how much the story would grab me.

FFXIV's story is very slow to start, but gradually builds on the humble roots of your adventurer until you're literally saving the entire universe. It's very, very gradual, and this slow pace might turn people off as well. Especially if you hear people say "it really gets good at heavensward!" "shadowbringers is unforgetable!" "just wait til next expansion--" these sorts of things are common to hear, but it's the same as touting that a game gets good "after the first 20 hours of gameplay", it's poison. Just try it out and see how you feel about how it plays. If the style of doing quests is interesting to you, if the combat feels engaging or shallow. etc. hey wait this was supposed to be about my ocs. ok i'll finish talking about the story and then get back to my ocs.

Anyhow. The story is really shallow at first, it's true. Even within the whole base game itself, (A Realm Reborn, aka 2.0), it can be a bit dull and contrived, and boy oh boy is the voice acting completely awful... It's rough around the edges. But if you're like me, you can really appreciate a series that starts out rough around the edges, and slowly evolves over time from humble beginnings into an epic tale that really blows away your expectations... It's about growing with the narrative, to me. If that sounds interesting to you, maybe you'll like it. I certainly did. In fact, ffxiv might be like... top 10 games to me, in terms of how its story affected me personally. Particularly the shadowbringers and endwalker expansions. But you can't skip all the way there, either- the context of everything that happened before it is crucial to understanding where you're at once you get to those expansions. The more you skip, the more lost you'll likely be. Take your time. Don't rush. And ignore anyone who tells you "it gets really good at (x) part!!!", it's a great way to set yourself up for disappointment if you end up not personally connecting with a certain plotline or character moment. I think, the thing that makes ffxiv really special... is.. it's YOUR story. The story of you- your warrior of light. And the parts that are going to connect for YOU, and for your warrior of light, are not necessarily the same as what connects for anyone else. You may end up loving the slow, humble beginnings of ARR, and feel alienated by all the saving-the-world stuff that comes later. Who knows! It's what you make of it. That's kind of the beauty of it. Now, I could talk all day about how I personally connected to shadowbringers and endwalker, (and some smaller moments, scenes, & questlines from earlier in the game), but you didn't come here for all this, you came here to read about my ocs. SORRY.

I'm done talking about FFXIV as a game now. It's time to ramble about my OCs.

FFXIV is really great for making OCs, if you like its setting. Square Enix doesn't like when you talk about it, but there's a pretty big modding scene that lets you customize your characters way beyond what the vanilla game allows for. This is often used for horny purposes, but more interesting to me personally is the gender euphoria I get from seeing my own body reflected in my own character. I gave Cassern wider shoulders, made her taller than any other au ra woman can be in vanilla, and gave her the horns that are typically only on male character models. She is so transgender. i love cassern.

Cassern Qestir is the warrior of light, meaning she's the protagonist that goes on to save everyone and everything. But at the start of her story, she's a budding new adventurer, completely new to Eorzea- her home is far to the east, in the Azim Steppe, where most Xaela Au Ra hail from. It started out casting spells, but picked up ninjitsu along the way, and quickly became one of the most skilled shinobi there is.

(she kills fascists lol)

she's also pretty socially awkward, in spite of her unparalleled combat capabilities... it lacked a lot of confidence early on in the story, too, but over time it got a lot of character development, and gained confidence. my little beepo. i have a lot of photos of it, but I don't want to make this TOO long... plus, it's difficult to give a spoiler-free overview of her character that's still approachable to people that don't know anything about the game. I suppose I could talk about her backstory, because most of my writing for her actually happens before the main game... but, eh, I'd still need to introduce a lot of settings and topics that wouldn't make sense if you haven't played before. tricky to do. maybe I'll attempt that one of these days. Anyhow... onto my next oc...

This is Samga Mol! they/them. bi.

Samga is a touchy, standoffish Xaela dragoon. (Dragoon means they fight with a lance- it's one of the many jobs in the game, like Ninja is. I'd need another long tangent to explain that in full.) Samga was actually close friends with Cassern in their youth, having also grown up on the Azim Steppe- but the two of them haven't spoken in years... I wonder what happened between them?

They're very edgy, as dragoons often are- but they also have a softer, gentler side that they don't often let show... They also get grumpy if you say they're cute. (Which is just even cuter, by the way.) They actually have a soft spot for animals, particularly chocobos.

But shhh, don't tell anyone you saw them like this... they have a reputation to uphold, you know. Tough, menacing dragoon that kills in the name of dragonkind and all that. Most feared heretic in all of Ishgard, strikes fear into the hearts of the temple knights... Wait, weren't they from the Azim Steppe? How did that happen?? Hmm, I wonder...

---

I have a lot more OCs, but most of them don't have cohesive designs and intricate backstories like Cassern and Samga do- and more often than not, mostly exist just to add more depth to the story between the two of them. There's a few others I have, like this mad scientist catgirl named Dr. Frankie. I'm still working on her. She's completely unrelated to Cassern and Samga's story;

stay tuned if you enjoy morally dubious scientist women with an ephemeral grasp on social etiquette. i'm already obsessed with this little freak, i just need to develop her a bit more before i start showing her off all the time. she also has an ... "assistant" that i'm excited to design. more on that later.

Anyhow, this was a really, really brief overview of my ocs, and I have SO many more thoughts on them, that I post about with much more frequency over on @azimsteppe ... when I remember to... (I usually use twitter for ffxiv stuff, but I'm sure you're all familiar with how that website is faring these days...) just be aware that there are spoilers on that blog, and although i try to tag them, you'll likely run into some spoilery stuff if you browse there long enough.

please let me know what you think!! it always makes me happy hearing what people think of my ocs and what interests them about them... :] and!! big thank you for reading all of this!! it was a lot of fun just to ramble lol, my ocs mean a lot to me. so i'm glad it interests at least some of you. take care!!

[homophyte]

it is interesting to me that ive seen lately (n yknow this is subjective and likely not any real social force just what ive seen) many queer people simultaneously talking about taking back and embodying unpalatable and ‘unmarketable’ queerness (the recent return to the terms faggot and transsexual come to mind) which i think is pretty evidently shaped by the conservative moment were in of demonizing queer ppl and especially gnc and trans people as predators--it reads as a return to queer isolationism in the face of external hostility, imo--while at the same time ive seen a lot of rallying around the “original” 6 stripe rainbow flag as opposed to any of the purportedly ‘factional’ flags of different queer identities, with the assumption being different identity flags divide us while the rainbow flag encompasses everyone and its kinda fascinating to me bc the rainbow flag is probably the single most marketable and palatable and uncontroversial symbols of queerness which has been seamlessly uptaken by those who wish to sell it back to us as gets pointed out every pride month with all the cringey pride merch.... i dunno you could maybe take that as a point of hypocrisy and claim the queer community is itself in a conservative moment rn where its returning to a sense of history and historical continuity (perhaps even out of that sense of external threat) or even that the queer community has for some time been in a conservative moment given the like, decade of identity discourse and lashing out at any people deemed to not have a sufficiently established history or however we should categorize the bihets/ace discourse/transtrender-tucute discourse/pan discourse/bi lesbians discourse (because lets be frank its essentially all the same discourse just keeping up its momentum by leapfroging from one target to the next) which i think is, like, SOMEWHAT true but not entirely? its more interesting to me, in any case, as an expression of a conflict the queer community is facing given that current state of affairs RE antitransness and that very recent history. like, the simultaneous need to retreat to a safe sense of community which is welcoming to the very things the outer world is demonizing ie mutable gender, complex or contradictory experiences of gender, gender expression which is hostile to the cis binary, but also the ways in which it has to grapple with those discourses which have largely defined the community infighting for again the past decade. its queer people begging the question ‘how can we make the queer community welcoming to the girlfags and genderfucks and tboys who are being threatened when we have spent so much time making the queer community a hostile place for anyone with a non-conventional or not easily (or even just palatably) sortable sense of queer identity’. and the answer it seems to be grappling with at the moment is like, welcoming all that diversity of experience but being absolutely averse to naming it. yes we love all the fuckery with gender and sexuality never be marketable but like, ew, why are you calling yourself [insert microlabel here]. you can be genderweird but you cant call yourself genderweird. you can only exist as queer in the broadest possible way (the all-inclusive gay pride flag!) but if you try to name the specifics or use those identity labels weve been fighting over for years youre doing it wrong (the progress pride flag is now ugly and cringey and ‘too much’). i think theres something also to the way (at least on this site) transmisogynistic discourses have really taken hold as legitimate (though yknow i wont downplay how much a problem transmisogyny has like. always been in queer spaces no matter what) in the name of protecting n defending trans people. like its just regurgitated transmisogyny but its being mobilized supposedly in the service of helping trans people. idk its definitely getting a little late for me to string this together fully coherently but theres a throughline there, in the ways certain ideas are being consolidated and reified as ‘yes were more progressive now!’ when i think theres definitely something to question there in terms of like...are we? are we actually? are we doing better by the people were trying to help or are we setting strict standards and forcing ppl to adhere to them again?

[femboy-catgirl]

homestuck-tech-psy-fan ==> femboy-catgirl

Hello there! I don't believe we've been properly introduced, I'm Linus (/reference), also go by Gumi! they/it/xe/he/she, él/ella/eso in spanish! I'm bodily 18.

Sylph of Breath, Derse dreamer.

We are a plural/multiple system.

This is the place where we post and reblog shit, if you want to see our art (drawings, music, projects, code) go to:

@catgirl-creative.

our website: https://achromatic-azurevizor.neocities.org

BEFORE YOU INTERACT:

keep in mind that we support all good faith identities, all beings rights to belong in society, all religions and belief systems, are fully against censorship and harassment, do not condone glorified/romanticized abuse depictions in media, believe everyone can interpret media however they want, all headcanons are valid and basically live and let live, if it doesn't hurt anyone it should be ok.

don't involve us on discourse. if you don't like something we post (such as a ship, a headcanon, an opinion, an anecdote and such) either ignore (we don't have to agree with everything) or hardblock.

ABOUT US

we are a 18 year old, chilean, nonhuman catgirl/boy/enby :3! severely disabled, fibromyalgia, are autistic and severely mentally ill, trigender agender fem presenting/femboy, bisexual lesbian, polyam, queer.

we like Homestuck/MSPFA, retroware, FOSS, art, content creation, rabbit holes/deep dives, psychology and medicine in general, queer stuff (history, pride, coining, etc.) and some others

I tend to become defensive and aggressive when confused, so if we ever get into a misunderstanding, please be patient and explain things calmly and explicitly, I do not mean any harm and I try to be open minded, I'm just unable to understand things sometimes due to my disabilities.

System side

We are a fictive and nonhuman heavy.

some of us have our own blogs:

Willow: @willow-is-missing (tw for detailed descriptions mental health issues, nsfw/suggestive themes, grief, not fully screenreader accessible, +16 only, sometimes mentions of eating disorders)

@dirks-striders (for the many dirk striders and kin stuff)

Important info

As previously stated we are very mentally ill and you are adviced to interact with caution, if you try to befriend us or have any sort of meaningful relationship please be aware that you must be able to handle the intensity and commitment that it entails, otherwise don't waste our time.

Please use tone tags for us.

We use typing quirks, when untranslated they are tagged with #cw typing quirk. block them if you use a screenreader or have a hard time reading leet or similar, since these post won't be translated.

# I THINK THIS IS IMPORTANT TO ADD

we do not reply to mutual aid *asks* we do not have the energy or the time to check if it's true nor the money to donate. all blogs begging for shout outs, money or other things we cannot provide will be blocked, we don't have energy to deal with them. we don't reblog or support guilt tripping content, as important as it could be.

we reblog untagged politics and suggestive (textual) posts at times, we can tag things if asked but we may fail at it as we usually don't think much when rebloging, we don't have much energy to double check and apply much critical thinking on several posts multiple times a day, we are here for fun. if we post or reblog weird stuff it's probably that or us impulsively posting whatever's on our mind (which are barely comprehensible strings of thought that if interesting enough get lose into the physical realm, regardless of quality)

[izzasecretredacted]

How About a Thirsty Sword Lesbians Solo RPG Journal?

Welcome to the very first post about my public chronicling about aliens of diverse walks of life (and some humans I suppose) becoming space cowboys, sticking together under rule of a mighty Federation that just hasn’t quite figured out the whole post-scarcity utopia thing, and the chaotic, uneasy rivalries they form which always just work out in the end! I hope to explore gender and sexuality using fantastical concepts. That, and I want to do heists and smuggling and sexy whip duels.

By the end of this post, I hope to introduce you to the Federation that rules the two populated galaxies, the Milky Way and Andromeda, and the pros and cons of being a citizen now that they’ve managed to take over the world. You’ll learn what a Sell-Whip is, and why they may seem dangerous but are actually pretty good people when you get to know them. And I hope to adequately explain why everyone keeps kidnapping each other and making up afterwards. I’ll add a tl;dr after every section, just in case you’re interested but don't have the time to dedicate towards reading my little history textbook.

Because this journal will touch on sensitive things like identity and culture, I encourage you to speak up if you find a problem with how I approach them (I’ve allowed anonymous questions on my account), so that I can learn what I’m doing wrong and improve the story being told. I don’t plan on stealing directly from existing cultures (except for my own, for the Human species of the American Hemisphere, and what not), but it’s not really feasible to build a new culture without some level inspiration from somewhere, and there’s always a risk of me making a mistake and ending up with something that's orientalist or demonizing. I only want to spread a story of love (and excitement… and whips), so if you don’t like something over it being offensive, I won’t like it either.

For the curious, and to establish the type of story I plan on telling, here’s a list of books I’ll be using…

Thirsty Sword Lesbians

A Spark in Fate Core

The Adventure Crafter

Perilous Wilds

And possibly more!

And lastly, here’s a content warning…

A Quick Mention of Bigotry

Systemic Oppression

Kidnapping

===

Section 1: How to take over the whole galaxy… twice.

It’s not quite as bad as past history would lead you to believe. Turns out all you needed was UBI and free healthcare, and to just share resources with everyone instead of going to war. It’s a little easier said than done, I suppose, but we figured this out centuries ago in this escapist, semi-utopic world. The problem is that after all this, those damned American Earthlings still managed to make it all about them.

To be fair to the Earthlings of the 2Xth century, they’re at least a little more progressive. They’ve learned how to perform diplomacy with other nations without invading them or supporting a coup, and they started accepting all ethnicities, genders, abilities, and orientations. They even avoided a robot uprising by giving android rights, and even banning non-androids from producing them. 

Unfortunately they haven’t learned how those people have been systematically oppressed. Seeing as Earth developed convenient FTL space travel before any other planet in either galaxy, they got a lot of first say on how the galactic union should be organized. The result is the formation of the Federation, benevolent enough to be beyond greed and direct violence, but fully capable of enforcing Homogeny.

tl;dr: This game takes place in the Milky Way and Andromeda, which is run by a single body called the Federation, which is basically like Star Trek, but there’s no Prime Directive so they act like they know what's best for you.

===

Section 2: We got rid of capitalism, but we decided to keep corporate culture.

Homogeny is built from common ideals that mostly come from Earth; valuing procreation over recreation, the protestant work ethic, and a frustratingly narrow view of what it means to have dignity are just some of what it means to be Homogenous.

To be fair, once again, to the Earthlings of the 2Xth century (yeah, I’m biased), Homogeny isn’t identical to how Earthlings live, or even how those in the American hemisphere of this time. Earthlings still value their own history, identity, and bodies, while Homogeny justifies itself by acting above such concerns, claiming to have equal apathy to all walks of life. With that being said, it’d be pretty rich to say that those in the American hemisphere don’t fit into Homogeny, or that they don’t still have heavy influence in how it's formed. After all, there’s a reason people in a separate galaxy are speaking English.

The challenges that Homogeny causes are related to the bloated bureaucracy that the Federation clings to. For a common citizen, say, a species who requires sunlight more regularly than most others, you need to demonstrate in documentation why you need a sunroom anytime you move to another planet, and wait for that to get approved. For a society's government official, not only is your unique, local, and important role dumbed down to ‘government official’, but you also need to explain why the consumption of a poisonous drink is as harmless as consuming something like, for instance, wine.

For those who don’t fit into Homogeny, but feel fulfilled living within your local culture, you’re still typically able to avoid all this headache and still live a safe, authentic, or even luxurious life. The only obstacle, assuming you even fit in a local culture, is whether or not your society is able to navigate the legal maze outside and be granted everything their people need. Unfortunately, from time to time, the Federation just won’t play along in a timely or sufficient enough manner, and that's where all the outsiders of the galaxies swoop in and save the day for everyone else.

tl;dr: Cultures that don’t fit in need to constantly justify why they should have the right to be how they are.

===

Section 3: The best part, where I can finally tell you what a Sell-Whip is!

Smugglers, pirates, robbers… you’ve seen sci-fi adventures, you know the trope. The reason I gave this reveal seven paragraphs of build up is because I wanted to put the motivations of this group in context. These aren’t scoundrels, atleast not how they’re classically portrayed. Sure, many of them do what they do because they don’t fit with the cultures they were raised in, but that’s not out of persecution, that’s just the beauty of being a sentient individual with unique wants and needs. While the Federation are convinced this is a profession of delinquency taken to a dangerous extreme, naming them after the Earthling concept of a sellsword, this is a role that exists because of compassion, comradery, and most importantly for many, necessity.

The whip is the weapon of choice because, by the 2Xth century, making a prehensile whip is pretty trivial. Not only do you have the utility of being able to grab things from a distance, but you have the choice between striking and grappling from a distance. It’s a very practical choice that has nothing to do with the fact that they’re cool and super kinky I promise it's super thoughtful world building.

Sell-Whips are typically, although not always, non-homogeneous peoples. They know what it’s like to not have they’re ways acknowledged, or atleast are willing to listen, and they don’t much like the idea of passing on the favor. They’re respectful in a way that goes beyond the Federation’s passive tolerance and senseless questioning. Sell-Whip Captains accept others on their vessel without ever experiencing a conflict with them regarding their way of life, outside of the challenge involved in converting your new first mate’s quarters into a fully aquatic environment (they’ll figure it out, don’t worry). If offered, an Unassimilated might even take part in a practice to burn time in warp-drive. There’s a lot of time spent in warp-drive, crew members have plenty of time to get to know each other.

tl;dr: Space Piracy is inclusive and cool and based. Also, whips.

===

Section 4: By the way, the Sell-Whips are kidnapping each-other. No hard feelings, it’s just business… sort of…

The Federation has developed a program where those under a warrant for arrest are also given a bounty, and it is really easy to get a warrant under suspicion of someone being a Sell-Whip. Conversely, bounties can be earned with almost no documentation beyond proof that you have the bounty in question. This has resulted in previously allied Sell-Whips being pitted against each other to get more credits, which can be used to get supplies that the societies they work for may not be able to provide. For anyone that’s willing to acknowledge it, a Bounty Hunter and a Sell-Whip are almost always the same person.

There is a silver-lining, the bounty system is so underfunded and backed up that this rarely leads to getting someone to trial before they manage to escape at the suspiciously last second. It turns out that while the Federation has its many major flaws, some that work within it are aware of these flaws and do what they can to fight it without losing their jobs. As much as it’d be nice to abolish the system, people were atleast able to make lemonade with it.

Keeping someone with a bounty captive is done by Sell-Whips for just the passive income, never the bounty itself. In the time it takes to schedule a trial, the Federation will pay the captor credits in return for keeping them until then. There’s an etiquette involved to make keeping someone against their will as painless as possible, even as they do everything they can to escape. When the time to collect the bounty gets near, the captor engineers an escape for the captive to make, and does a bogus search which just ensures they get back to civilization safely. Some Sell-Whips might even say they had fun, just don’t let it spread to other captains.

tl;dr: The Federation developed a bounty system designed to cause Sell-Whip infighting, and Sell-Whips responded by developing a system to make it safe, sane, and (almost) consensual. You can’t ask to not be captured, but you’ll never actually see a Federation prison, and you’ll even get aftercare on the way.

===

Section 5: Am I forgetting anything… OH, right, the awakening eldridge horrors! Silly me.

There’s a decades-old field of technology that uses thought-free lifeforms, such as the trees of Earth, or the brainless nerve tendrils of Klendis, called Bio-Tech. Recently, a new type of bio-tech that can clone the DNA of fossils has been developed. The potential of this field is possibly limitless, but its potency is quite difficult to control. Scientists working in this field found that, as the field advanced, accidents would be more frequent, less predictable, and cause more and more damage. The dangers of this field were only becoming more clear, Sell-Whips started to refuse working with anyone who used this tech, and the Federation started restricting it to the point where it had been banned completely, even to their own scientists.

Extinction-Tech, as it's now called, is today a field of nefariousness and secrecy. Those who develop it believe the advancement should exist for advancements sake, though very little work gets done without some disaster striking. Those who use it have some agenda that can’t be done without it. If you spot someone using or practicing Extinction-Tech, no one will blame you for turning them in to Federation custody, most will likely thank you for it.

tl;dr: Stop making Cthulhu, ffs…

===

Section the Last One

Whether you're here after all that rambling, or you just skipped to the end to check for any justifications on my madness, you might have some questions. I like questions, it means people care about me! There's actually some stuff about the world I haven't posted yet, if you can believe that, and plenty more I still need to expand on. If there's anything you're interested in seeing developed or elaborated, let me know, or maybe spitball your own ideas. There's plenty of room in this massive world for all sorts of fun fantasies!

Also, I'm tagging posts about this project as "#sell-whip anna" to keep it all organized.