#every time i think i'm eating them all up i realise i am dressed like a muppet

[wolf-twenty-one]

how i look when i'm about to say "thanks! it's all thrifted!!!"

[extremelyblackandwhite]

pairing: dad!bucky barnes x au pair!reader

warnings: age gap (reader is 10 years younger than bucky), mentions of smut (18+, dni if under 18)

author’s note:  last time i posted was december 31. i am very sorry is all i have to say 🤣

masterlist

i keep these longings lost in lowercase inside a vault ...

      - But I wanna go! - Sadie whined as Y/N was preparing her to go spend some time with her grandmother.

Sadie wasn't one to really enjoy being away from her father and Y/N had made the grave mistake of telling her she and her dad were going out for a meal which in Sadie's mind roughly translated to they're going out to eat without her.

      - I know, munchkin but you won't like the restaurant me and daddy are going to. They don't sell any chicken nuggets.

      - But daddy always makes them have it.

      - That's sweet, baby, but I don't think daddy can change menus. I think.

The red head pouted as Y/N finished sorting her out. She wondered if Bucky had a nugget empire of restaurants he could choose or if he was that well respected a chef would just prepare it for him just because his daughter wanted it. Whatever way it was, she stood there realising she'd never gone on a date with someone that high up. Sure she had her little affairs with men that had a trust fund but they were just that, the sons of powerful men. Bucky was both - the son of a powerful man and a powerful man himself. Did she even know how to dress for a man like that?

She sighed, entering her bedroom and opening her closet, crossing her arms at the sight in front of her. "Downtown at 7", what kind of information was that? It could mean a myriad of things which required a different dressing code. Damn you Bucky and your vague instructions. Y/N eventually decided on a black dress, hoping that would work for everything.

Y/N looked at herself in the mirror and put her lipstick on. The same mantra was going over and over in her mind "it's just a date", yet every time she did she rationalised that it wasn't just a date. It was a date with Bucky, her Bucky, her boss Bucky, father of Sadie Bucky. Just do it, she told herself as she went to grab her purse to meet Bucky at his office, just do it.

      - Has anyone ever told you you take as long as my daughter to get ready? - she jumped a bit as she heard Bucky's voice.

      - What are you doing here?

      - We have a date, have you forgotten? - he got up, his hands inside the pockets of the neatly tailored suit as he approached her. - Or are you chickening out?

      - I'm not chickening out. I thought I was meeting you at your office. I mean, you usually finish at 6:30 and since you said 7, I thought ...

      - I forgot that you're the boss of my company. - he interrupted with his characteristic smirk. - I got off early. Got a new suit, fresh shave.

      - Shame. I do like the stubble. - she said as she caressed his face. His cheeks warmed up at her touch. - Maybe now I do need to cancel my date with you.

      - You like Italian? - he said as he helped her put her coat on. It was almost like a scene from an old movie. - There's this restaurant downtown a friend of mine opened, really quiet and private.

      - Wanna hide me, huh? - she smirked.

      - No, no ... shit, that's not what I meant. I thought you'd like something more private? I don't wanna hide you I mean look at you, you're so gorgeous and ...

      - I'm just joking, Sergeant. - she interrupted him as she saw him get into a state of rambling. Bucky always knew what to say so to see him so tied up and awkward was rather enjoyable for her as she was the one to usually end up in that situation. - I think it sounds good. You really didn't need to go through all of this.

      - Why? Did you prefer I skip right over to sex? - he smirked, making her cheeks flush with warmth as she recalled the last night. - See? I can joke too.

      - Yeah sex with you is kind of a joke. - she retorted which made Bucky smile at her wit. - I dropped Sadie off at your mother's but she may call you at some point.

      - Yeah, I called my mum to speak to her but apparently she is upset because there's no chicken nuggets? Care to explain?

      - Long story. - Y/N shrugged. - Is she okay?

      - My dad's probably boring her to death with model trains and my mum is feeding her every sweet treat they can find, so I'd say she's fine.

      - She's going to be impossible tomorrow, isn't she?

      - I was hoping she stayed at my parents tomorrow as well.

      - Why? I'm bored, I have nothing to do until I hear back from my VIVA and Sadie keeps my mind away from it.

      - I have plans for you tomorrow.

      - What kind of plans?

      - Y/N, doll, do you ever stop asking questions?

      - I'm a scholar, my job is to ask questions. It's almost like I asked you to stop being bossy and impossible.

      - I am not bossy and impossible.

Y/N snorted a bit at that statement. She adored Bucky and he had been nothing but a great boss - to her at least. He was a perfectionist and liked everything done with the best results in mind which sometimes led to him being quite impossible, specially if her was in a sour mood. Heck, sometimes she'd even been on the other end of it yet it usually ended up with him apologising.

      - Let's just go before you decide you don't wanna go out with a bossy and impossible man.

      - Jokes on you, maybe I do prefer my men bossy and impossible.

      - And still you dated ... what's his name?

      - Oh c'mon.

      - Bet he didn't take you to a nice restaurant.

      - It's not a competition and right now you haven't taken me anywhere.

      - The driver is waiting downstairs, I was just waiting for you.

      - You got the driver? Bucky, I could've driven us there.

      - In the yellow monstrosity? I think not.

      - HEY! Ducky is a great car.

      - The fact you named your car makes it worse. It's a Fiat 500 cosplaying as a Tweety Bird.

      - You know the word cosplay? Wow, you're a very advanced old man in your pop culture.

Bucky rolled his eyes, wrapping his arm around her waist and bringing her downstairs. He didn't exactly knew how to act on a date with her, she was not the type of woman he usually dated - he actually hadn't even dated in a while, he was one to just go to dinner for one night stands only. His last date, Sadie was 5 months old and he went out with a woman named Elizabeth who worked in Wall Street - a date which had been cut short by his constant wondering about Sadie.

This was different, first Y/N didn't work in an area which matched his and, at least in his head, was a lot more educated than him and probably worried about his daughter as much or sometimes even more. It was just different and he didn't exactly knew how to handle it in a suave manner and she seemed to notice as they sat. She gave him a knowing look before opening the restaurant menu.

      - How many people here do you think are convinced I'm your sugar baby? - she attempted to break the ice, her little mischievous smile as she looked at him over the menu. Bucky laughed at this, looking around before looking back at her.

      - Probably no one. If you were my sugar baby, your dress would fit you properly.

      - Hey! - she playfully kicked him under the table. - This is Marc Jacobs.

      - You wore that dress for your interview to be Sadie's au pair.

      - That was ... a while ago. I had just started at graduate school.

      - You had these really funny bangs and you used to carry around all of these really colourful notebooks.

      - Yeah the breakup bangs. - she giggled. - You know, I had just cut them the night before and I cried so much when I woke up because I thought they would ruin the interview.

      - Maybe your true calling is being a hairstylist.

      - If I don't pass, then it may be an avenue.

      - You really think you're not gonna pass your VIVA? C'mon, you're the smartest person I know.

      - You're just saying that so I'll end up in your bed tonight.

      - Uh, no, if I wanted you to end up in your bed tonight, I wouldn't need flattery. Just fifteen minutes alone with you in the restaurant bathroom and my hands.

She opened her mouth to respond back but immediately closed it, not sure of how to exactly answer to that. She'd heard stories, she knew he was right ... heck, she had experienced it just last night and she had to admit the idea of it was not entirely off putting.

      - Don't change the subject.

      - You changed the subject first, doll. - he shrugged. - You're the only person I know that doesn't believe you.

      - I don't wanna talk about it, Sergeant.

      - Bucky.

      - What if I prefer Sergeant?

      - Darling, you can call me whatever the hell you like, as long as you're calling me.

taglist: @talesofadragon @winters1917 @vladsgirlxx @stinkerbelle007 @maybefoxysouls @blackwood-bodecker-housewife @chipilerendi @kandis-mom @belennasif @abitofblues @floralwsloki @montyrokz @sealxfredweasley @legendarytrashcopeclipse @sydariah @purple-vegan @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 @slowdownbeforeyouregretit

[harlotofupdog]

This was meant to be a groveling apology post but it turned into a rage meta post.

I have so many fics that I want to read or finish reading from writers whose work I truly adore, and so much art that I want to stare at and squeal about, and I just haven't got to it. There are fics that I am so in love with and I just… I can't open AO3 until I can just sit, y'know?

I know that literally no-one is counting on me for this stuff because I am a tiny wonker, but I feel perpetually awful about it nonetheless. I also have a bunch of fic stuff (writing and beta) that I never get to, and I'm now at the point where I'm so overwhelmed by all the things I need to do that I'm paralysed by procrastination. There's probably a few topsy-turvy chonkadonks of recent news that haven't helped, but the main thing is…

FUCKING HOTEL ROOMS.

I spend so much time in hotel rooms. I used to love hotel rooms. It felt like a little treat every time I stayed in a nice one. Bright white sheets, little sachets of tea and shitty instant coffee, minibars, dressing gowns, inconvenient power outlets, unflattering mirrors - I loved it all. But now I fucking dread them. They are my ultimate (bad) liminal spaces - just fancy transit points between the airport or the train station or the closest fucking McDonald's where I can eat a zillion nuggets until I feel better.

I've tried to be productive in hotel rooms, I really have. I bring my laptop, I bring my sketchpad. Sometimes I have a couple of free hours in the evening, and god, why don't I use them? Instead, I sit and think and scroll while I drink all the shitty tea and shitty coffee and sometimes an entire bottle of red or whatever tiny booze they have in the minibar.

It occurs to me, after 6000 years of fucking hotel rooms, that they are… Heaven. They are, right? Crisp, light, bright, stifling. There's the concierge in their nice suit, the fancy faux marble foyer, elevators that sneak up from behind and then DING as if you're the arsehole for facing the other way, mirrors fucking EVERYWHERE jump-scaring you with your own face, the end of the toilet paper folded into a little triangle... (whose bum needs that? A tiny triangle before the rest of the paper? No-one's bum needs that!)

And Heaven is always watching, isn't it?

The binful of teabags, the crumpled up packets of crisps-for-dinner, the empty bottle of wine - they will all be SEEN, along with the sanitary bag and the snotty tissues and the laddered stockings that I've wrenched off in a rage because now I have to go buy more. (WHY DID HOTELS GET RID OF BIN BAGS?)

We haven't even made it to the mortifying ordeal of ordering room service as a solo business traveler. I order the club sandwich, because that is the first thing you should order in a hotel, always - this is a rule. I eat it, it's fine. Club sandwiches have probably hauled me back from the edge of madness/chicken nuggets at least four times now. The next night, though, I don't want a club sandwich. I want something else.

A pizza.

There is no option to order a half pizza, and if I order a whole pizza, I will eat the whole pizza. So I order a whole pizza, obviously. I eat the pizza, because of course I do - it's not great, but it's kinda okay and it's something to do because I can't do any of the other things like live or breathe or exist in regular human form.

But when the pizza is gone, I look at the empty tray sitting on the slimy glass-topped desk and the realisation hits: they will know I know they know that I sat on my pristine bed, shoving melted cheese and prosciutto into my mouth, probably in full view of some late night meeting in the next building over, while staring at a wall and fervently wishing I were elsewhere.

There is probably sauce on the sheets and a bit of rocket on the floor that I can't find, and the TV remote is greasy af. It's basically a murder scene and I will feel guilty for the next millennia and a bit.

In conclusion...

Heaven is a panopticon and so is the Hilton. But Azi showed up for it, and so will I. Hopefully we can all make it back to the comfy, dusty book-filled spaces for good one day.

[tadpolesonalgae]

hey tabby! I love your works(Thankyou for writing them) and I was wondering something (this is purely curiosity, in no way am I trying to "suggest" you write something outside of your schedule or anything, since I see the 'reqs closed sign' and I respect it.)

So I recently came across 'Filthy Mongrel' and absolutely LOVED it and as far I browsed, pleasure hall is the last you've written in the au, if I'm not wrong? so I'm just wondering if that's like, the end of it or if there's more parts you've considered adding sometime in the future?

Also, I was wondering the same about 'Bruises and burn marks'(I swear I've never read an Eris fic I loved as much) if it's supposed to end as a oneshot or if you've ever thought about what happens later on in the series?

I REALLY hope I'm not being too rude asking this.

Oh my gosh thank you so much for asking about this actually!!

So Filthy Mongrel was written first and then I realised I really liked that dynamic of younger Illyrian vs. Az? Since she’s pretty cruel to him? And I find anger a very interesting motivator/emotion to write? (Hence His (Mine.) and The Other Woman readers having pretty volatile tempers 🫣)

I could talk a lot about the His (Mine.) ‘canon’ universe, but in terms of Filthy Mongrel and The Pleasure Hall which are the aus, I’ve had another au I’ve been wanting to add for a long while 🤦 I think since before the Holidays if i’m honesty 😭 It’s in my drafts and it’s called The Blood In Our Mouths And The Flesh In Our Teeth which I’ve been desperate to write since it’s about reader and Az going deeper into Illyria!

We’ve already seen how Windhaven is, and Rhys has mentioned it’s one of the more progressive camps, so I’d like to use it as a chance to wonder about just how brutal the lifestyle might be? Just how old fashioned and maybe quaint in a way too it might be?

Really just a chance to afford myself more freedom since sjm didn’t particularly touch on Illyria so there are a whole bunch of opportunities to explore!

And yes, there will probably be smut, but there will hopefully be a lot of other stuff too relating to the Illyrian’s lifestyle!

As for Bruises and Burn Marks, I have to be honest I cringe every time I reread it 😭 I don’t think I got Eris’ character at all (I mean, it’s a dark fic so obviously I didn’t, but I feel like it was just waaayyy too much? Maybe I’m being harsh though 😭) I do have a request in my inbox for like an Eat You Up fic for Eris so hopefully I’ll get the chance to do right by him when that gets written!

I would like to write a fic though where the Illyrians weren’t made no villainous though? theorising over some traditions and dress styles? I think that would be fun?

Anyway, thank you so much for asking!!! I’m so flattered when people are interested in knowing more so it’s not rude at all!!! 🧡💛🫂🫂

[thehighpriestess1]

Okay I'm just gonna start of like when I read the spoiler that satoru was gonna die I thought he was actually gonna die but turns out he isn't good thing it's only a dream hopefully it stay like that

Can we all just take a moment of gojo being petty like when I read through the scene where he just throw the all the resume paper with all the male to the trash I thought he was a menace but sending another ma to Africa for our dear milf queen having a homie moment damn like I guess we ain't getting our date night after all it was guees we ain't having no friends unless their good in satoru radar or a girl 😔 does make me wonder imagine this instead of males being interested to our girl what if it's the same gender thought???? 🤔🤔🤔 Like what's gojo plan of action then 😂😂 it was kinda sweet of him waiting with keiseku for y/n in their bedroom IDK HOW y/n DIDN'T FOLDED WHEN GOJO ASK FOR HER TO JOIN IF I WAS HER I WOULD HAVE FOLDED WAY WAY BEFORE I SWEAR 😩😩

Also am I the only one who got the coffee reference from sdf I was literally laughing when I read those and said i guees we getting another noritoshi LOL

Their argument pretty based on them not being able to communicate much better I swear now whenever I eat anything related waffle I'm gonna think of the waffle scene man was crying while eating those soggy waffles like he was a kid who was forced to eat vegetables but instead of throwing it away he probably ate them thinking it better than five course meal i somehow come the point that I hate him salute to him to his dedication still eating them like a champ think anyone agreement Jerry the true MVP in this chapter like where was him when we needed him in the first chapter like it was mentioned y/n and Jerry met before 99% of the problem in the series would have been solved if he was there was he Also the one who taught gojo about fashion like ain't no way satoru got good fashion Sense in him when he choose those clothes for our queen

I feel like the two just need to not fucked each other to avoid any angst coming their way because whenever those two do the deed something always come up but on the good side we got feral gojo he got me running lapses in my room I swear he's like that person that sooo scary but still come out being a hot person like two dangerous combination but super hot also how big was the couch in the dressing room to be able to fit the two of them baby number gonna be shocked af when the parents told them where they were created 😂😂😂

Also can I just get a moment that my cat literally name is yuri she's a little feisty but I care about her she's a mother two kids ok I'm going off the track I saw someone saying that geto might join yuri side and I admit it was good but what if hear me out it was utahime helping her out what's drug gojo was on must have really knocked him out real bad man didn't even gave consent my first though that yuri paid someone to dress up that to get those pictures what ever it is she's delulu praying for yuri to get admitted to retirement home by retirement home I mean the cemetery but it's the same thing right 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

Okay first of all I LOVE YOU for getting that SDF reference!!! Like guuurrrrl that made me happy! Thank you!!!

If a female was interested in the reader then gojo would be just so confused! But I doubt he'd get that feral. He'll give that woman a bombastic side eye like 😒

Y/n lowkey folded when Gojo asked her to join but our girl is resilient 💅🏻

That waffle scene was a way to make Gojo realise what he missed out on because of his pettiness and anger. He would NEVER make that mistake again.

Gojo and y/n should do a energy cleansing every time they do the deed because.....it seems cursed and I want them to make more babies without any complications 😂😂😂

That leather bench/couch was something like this except in maroon colour.

We'll have to wait and see who has been helping Yuri because someone is definitely on her side 😉 why send her to cemetery once when Gojo can k**l her everyday 🤫🤫

I apologise to your cat I bet she is the cutest floof ever with two kittens snbabdkaman!!

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

So excited for Fluffiness!

Ugh so many good choices to choose from! Please can I request-

Ivar and "Let's get you out of those wet clothes"

Masterlist

By the Babbling Brooke

Can be read as part of Rest Your Weary Hands or as stand-alone.

Contains: Fluff, smut, oral sex F receiving, fingering, P in V.

1.4K words

Comment if you want to be tagged/removed or follow #Sp's fluffiest Smutfest

You enjoy a day by the river with Ivar and his brothers

It was a beautiful summer day, hot enough that your light linen dress was all you needed to wear but not so hot that you couldn't do anything. You had spent breakfast arguing back and forth, all be it affectionately about Ivar's brothers wanting to come with you and Ivar for a day by the river.

You had tried to tell them that you wanted to spend some alone time with your husband but they didn't want to listen, going on and on about how nice the day was and how it would be a waste if you didn't all enjoy it together. And that's how you ended up sitting on the river bank with your husband while he exchanged loving insults with his brothers as they fished.

"You call that a fish, you're meant to be catching lunch, not feeding the barn cats."

Ubbe splashed Ivar and you glared at him, "I'm here too, just because Ivar's been an ass doesn't mean I need to get wet as well."

Ivar smiled, "you will dry in half an hour stop complaining."

You shoved your husband playfully, "excuse me good sir, I'm on your side."

Ivar took your face in his hands, "then go out there and help my brothers catch lunch."

You stayed on the shore with Ivar, choosing to ignore him. It didn't take long for them to catch something substantial and then they were dropping themselves next to the fire to dry off while the fish cooked.

You reclined back against Ivar's chest, his fingertips brushing your cheek affectionately, "I think it's going to rain, look at the sky."

Ivar looked from your face and followed your finger, his eyes landing on a cloud, "it looks like you're right, it might be good thing, it would be hot tonight if it didn't rain." He reached up and took your hand, taking it in his and bringing it to your lips, "even though my brothers decided to interrupt out day, I'm still enjoying our time together."

Hvitserk slapped his brother's shoulder, "can't we spend time with you, little bother? You spend every waking minute with your wife."

Ivar grumbled, "I love you brother but you're nothing to look at, my wife is a work of art, I am blessed by the Gods simply to sit in her presence."

You flipped in his arms and pressed a kiss to his lips, "you know how to sweet talk me my love."

Sigurd's eye wrinkled, "you don't need to lay it on thick brother, she's going to suck your cock no matter what."

Ivar picked up a stick and threw it at Sigurd, "behave brother."

Ubbe rolled his eyes, "the food is ready, can you all stop bickering so we can eat?"

You smiled, "thank you Ubbe."

****

The clouds rolled in as it got later, Ivar seemingly unbothered by the fact that if you didn't leave now, you wouldn't make it back home by the time the rain started. "You worry too much wife, it's not cold and my legs have been fine since the snow melted."

You sighed, "I don't want to get wet."

He chuckled, "it's just rain my love, there's nothing to worry about." Right on time, the heavens opened and poured down on everyone. Everyone packed in a hurry but it was too late, by the time was walked through the doors of the Great Hall, you were dripping wet.

"See, I'm soaked."

Ivar took your hand and walked you into your shared bedroom, his hands stroking from your face to your shoulders, "come on my love, let's get you out of those wet clothes."

Ivar's large fur cloak had kept him dry and you suddenly realised his plan, "did you do this so you could get me naked?

He smiled and he walked slowly behind you, unlacing your dress and sliding it off you, "you know me so well." He smiled as bumps covered your skin, "are you cold?"

You smiled and wrapped your arms around your body as Ivar walked back around to stand in front of you, "a liitle."

He took your face in his hands and kissed you. You reached down and gripped his tunic as Ivar walked you towards the bed, your knees hitting the edge as you fell backwards, Ivar falling on top of you and catching himself on his extended arms.

You pulled his tunic off, Ivar's lips detaching from yours only long enough for you to pull it over his head, when you went to remove his pants he stopped you, grabbing your hand gently then bringing them to his lips, "let me warm you up."

His lips brushed your neck and you tilted your head to give him more access to your skin. He kissed down your neck, paying extra attention to your upper chest until your hand found his head, "I'm getting there, don't rush me." One hand came up to cup your breast while his mouth found the other, the warmth from his huge hand spreading over your skin.

Your fingers rubbed his scalp while he swapped positions, tweaking your nipples between his fingers while his lips travelled further down your body. He kissed over your hips then lifted your legs over his shoulders, his hand leaving your breast as it stroked your skin. He met your eyes and you nodded, Ivar taking that as all the permission he needed to drive in like a man dying of starvation.

Your breath caught in your throat as his lips wrapped around your clit and one hand squeezed your thigh lovingly while his other hand left your breast and circled your entrance with two of his long, thick, calloused fingers, "please." Ivar smiled against your skin and slid his fingers inside you.

You gasped as he pressed his fingers to your G-spot, his moan sending vibrations through your body, causing a pleasant heat to radiate from your core. He pushed you closer to the edge with all the fervour of a man at war, he knew exactly what you needed and how you needed it and Ivar was never a man to put himself at a disadvantage. You pressed his head closer to your body and he took his hand off your thigh and removed one of your hands from his head, running his hand down your wrist and interlocking his fingers with yours.

You barely had the chance to warn him before you were clenching around his fingers and moaning his name, "please, please I want more." Ivar chuckled against your skin and pulled his fingers out of you, sticking them in his mouth and sucking your wetness off them with a groan. He kissed a path to your mouth slowly, nipping your skin every now and then, the sparks of pain making your brain feel fuzzy.

He reached your lips and you could taste yourself on his skin, then he was lifting your leg over his hip and grabbing his cock, running it back and forth over your wet slit. You rolled your hips and he smiled, looking down at you with love in his eyes as he slid inside your slowly. He swallowed your whimper as he bottomed out and you bit his lower lip as he rocked into your G-spot, his free hand reaching down to rub your clit as the arm holding him up rippled with strength.

He pulled back and looked into your eyes, a small smile forming on his face, "does that feel good my dear?"

You nodded, "yes, yes it feels wonderful."

His lips brushed yours as his hips sped up, "that's good because you feel like Valhalla." He buried his face in your neck and his teeth sunk into your skin, leaving a mark you knew the others would be able to see in the morning, no matter how sweet Ivar was in these moments, his possessive streak was always there.

You wrapped your arms around him and held him closer, whimpering in his ear as his fingers rubbed your clit, "please, I'm close."

Ivar grunted, "me too, you can let go for me, I'm right here with you." You were powerless to resist his gentle command, your vision going white as pleasure filled your body pleasure. He moaned in your ear as he followed you into bliss. He shifted his hips just enough to slide out of you then rested his weight on you, "are you still cold?"

His tone was full of love and affection, "no, I'm quite warm."

He smiled and pressed his lips softly to yours, "well anytime you need warming up I'm here."

You sighed, "I love you Ivar."

He returned your smile, kissing you again, "I love you too y/n."

Fin

[chancellor-reno5]

AllTober Day 5 - "I'm Not Going Anywhere"

Contains: Self-Harm, Alcohol, Suicidal Intentions, Kunikidazai

Fandom: Bungo Stray Dogs

Characters: Kunikida Doppo, Dazai Osamu

It wasn't uncommon for Dazai to attempt to kill himself - he even went as far as to call it a hobby. There was no meaning to life in Dazai's mind, so why would he live something with no meaning? Dazai witnessed murder, abuse and every other crime you could think, and also committed a large number of them as well. Even so, for some reason, someone cared.

In the Port Mafia, it was Odasaku. Even if Oda saw that there was no life or ambition behind the dead of Dazai's eyes, he still cared about Dazai. If it wasn't for Oda, Dazai would never have left the mafia.

Now, it was his work partner, Kunikida Doppo. But Kunikida was different. Kunikida specifically would find a section of his perfect schedules, and that section would be 'check on Dazai'. He would dress Dazai's wounds, make sure Dazai ate, and see it that Dazai slept. All before Kunikida would focus on himself.

Today was no different. Kunikida was in Dazai's apartment, at the same time everyday. He stood at Dazai's cooker, making the former mafia member something to eat. Unfortunately, Kunikida hadn't gotten there before Dazai had drank a few too many - and Kunikida had yet to find out.

------------------------------------------------------------

"Why do you help me?" Dazai blurted out after he'd eaten what Kunikida made. The mathematician was in the midst of redressing Dazai's wounds, some old and some new - most self-inflicted, few accidental.

"Sorry?" Kunikida was confused, no doubt.

"Why do you help me?" Dazai repeated. He tilted his head, laid on the back of the couch, towards Kunikida.

"Why shouldn't I? You're worth the same care as everyone else" Kunikida replied, finishing with wrapping Dazai's arm, moving round to the other.

"Am I? You know what I've done... It's punishment is it not?" Dazai stared at his ceiling as he said this.

"You've proven you can and have changed, Dazai. Yes, you drive me nuts, but when you don't it leaves me concerned. You're not the kid you were, alright?" Kunikida said with a tone that only a teacher could manage, using his ability to get another reel of bandage, realising he'd ran out.

"Heh, and I'm the crazy one... You're insane if you think that makes anything better" Dazai grumbled, watching Kunikida.

"Never said it made what happened better. However, you're helping in an effort to make Yokohama safer".

"Kunikida..."

Kunikida glanced up from behind his glasses, finishing the other arm. He immediately noticed that Dazai had tears rolling steadily down his face.

"... Why of all people do you keep me as your partner...?"

"You're more than a damn partner Dazai, and you know that. You're a part of me as I am a part of you" Kunikida moved to sit beside Dazai, pulling the shorter detective into a hug. Outside of Kunikida's usual actions, yes, but it would happen occasionally and Dazai would relax into it. Dazai fell silent, before wrapping his arms around Kunikida, sending the ex-teacher onto his back, only so Dazai could rest his head on Kunikida's chest. He would do this when he got like this - lay and listen to Kunikida's heart, and fall asleep to it, knowing that he would be safe.

"I'm not going anywhere, Dazai. I'm here to stay".

------------------------------------------------------------

AllTober is hosted by:

[markantonys]

ohmigosh, your sims are all adorable!! and i love their stories so much :) i used to lovingly tolerate 3 bc i had a pretty low-spec computer so it was very laggy, but now i have an actual gaming laptop and 3 isn't compatible anymore, so i play 4 all the time. i've also got a ton of mods (99% clothing and hair bc i'm addicted to dressing my sims up), including the ones you mentioned - they're such a big help when it comes to gameplay, i love them <3

please don't worry about infodumping, it's so cool to meet another sims fan!!

thank you!! <33 haha yeah i remember sims 3 was SO laggy and took like 20 minutes for me to boot up every time, i still have a subconscious mindset of "okay, once i load up sims i can't exit out of the game until i'm fully 100% done playing for the day because it's not worth trying to load it twice in one day" even though 4 only takes a couple minutes to load. and i totally feel you, dressing my sims up is one of my top favorite parts of the game, and there's so much amazing cc out there!

oh, i just realised i forgot to answer your question: i'm an aging on simmer, but i think i might turn it off bc i too prefer just starting up new households rather than going through generations. i am very much an autonomy off girlie, though; i tried leaving it on, but the control freak in me likes micromanagement too much 😅 this is my last one, i promise: can you tell me if having autonomy on makes storytelling more interesting? i pick a bunch of traits that should make my sims more/less compatible, but for some reason they don't react to things the way i want them to (then again some of the traits are modded ones rather than base game ones so that might be partly the reason, they don't always seem to have an effect on sim behaviour)

you should give aging off a shot to see how you like it! i like my current system of having aging off in one save file and aging on in a different one so i can have it both ways and do my legacy challenge properly without messing with my rotational freeplay households. when i have aging off i do still age up my sims using a birthday cake, but i just do it whenever i feel like they're ready for the next life stage rather than the game having a set day that's their birthday. so it can get kinda weird if my sim is going to high school with the same teens her mom went to high school with because i aged their household up manually but everyone else is immortal djkfg but i don't usually last more than 2 generations in a single family so for me it's not much of an issue!

and i SO know what you mean about liking micromanagement too much haha i definitely still micromanage my sims even with autonomy on! so in that respect it can be challenging if you're constantly trying to stop them from doing things you don't want them to do. i like it especially for large households because if i can't keep track of everybody, having autonomy on will make them eat on their own when they get hungry etc whereas i believe if it's off they'll just die unless i specifically tell them to eat. as for whether it makes storytelling more interesting, yes and no, i also feel like traits don't have a huge effect on storytelling and autonomy on doesn't really change that too much, i don't think (besides a couple, like goofball sims keep trying to prank toilets with autonomy on, romantic sims are more likely to autonomously flirt, and i'm guessing mean or evil sims would keep being autonomously mean, but i never make mean or evil sims because i'm too soft haha).

i think social interactions are the area where autonomy on most spices up gameplay because your sim might randomly flirt with or be mean to someone you didn't expect them to (especially if they're in certain moods, being in a flirty mood makes them extra likely to autonomously flirt with someone and being in an angry mood makes them extra likely to autonomously be mean). this can be a fun way to throw in some curveballs, or it can also be infuriating if your sim decides to flirt with some rando right in front of their spouse and now the whole marriage is in shambles djkfg i would say if you're thinking of testing out autonomy on, maybe give it a go with a 1-2 sim household to start so that you can get a sense for what autonomy on is like, but it's a small enough household that it's easy to keep an eye on everybody and prevent them from going too off the rails!

[gettatranslations]

Is Anyone Coming Yumigeta Ako (23.10.29)

Good evening🌝

I'm Yumigeta Ako🛑

Thank you very much for your comments yesterday！

I really like individual events…

And I really enjoyed reading your comments about it too‼️‼️‼️

...

And for today's individual event…

Was our Halloween Event sponsored by Ikuta Erina-san…！

Yes、us members wore costumes‼️‼️‼️

I became Little Red Riding Hood❤️‍🔥

Today's skit。

In anime you often see

The 「Is anyone coming〜」 scene🤣

At first I was just messing around but looking at the photos they were actually pretty cute and I was like 「Oh？」 so I'll post one ♡

At Yumigeta's booth today、it felt like a snack bar in the second part of the event(˶ᐢᗜᐢ˶)

I got to ask the people who visited me lots of questions like

「Which one is your favourite��✌️

Everyone seemed to enjoy answering which made me happy‼️

By the way the most popular was the Otokoume Sheets！

Did you choose that one because of me〜 Fufufu 笑lol

And the mikan🍊🍊🍊

I made it into a chandelier before eating it😋

Lots of people seemed happy to see us in costume which makes me happy‼️

The reason I went for Little Red Riding Hood、

Isn't because of my member colour or just because it's cute、it's actually because I didn't know what to dress up as for ages so I asked lots of people and they all said 「Little Red Riding Hood」 so that's what I did！

I also tried to look more mature with my lipstick💪💪💪

Full body shot。

It's cute right〜

And lots of people said 「Trick or Treat」 to me…

Hehehe unfortunateーly

I'm not giving you any sweets because Little Red Riding Hood wants to keep them all for herself (^^)

I kept joking like this but I also had fun with our more serious talks so it was an amazing day‼️‼️‼️

There were lots of people I saw for the first time in a while too〜✨️

Ahー I want to do individual events every day

I'm so grateful‼️

Thank you very much‼️‼️

⋆┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈⋆

Well then it's time for today's 【Gettaa Life】✨

Today I took lots of photos of Oda-san〜💜

Oda-san was super duper cute‼️

Oda-san is so beautiful that I got all flustered🤣😂

...

By the way、did you see Oda-san's costume today？？？？

If you haven't seen it yet please go and look right now。

It's insーane、it's really cute…

Her costume had a tail、which bounced around every time Oda-san moved！

It was so cute、

I took a photo of Oda-san while Oda-san was taking a photo for Ishida-san、and Oda-san was so cute…

Ishida-san's costume was amazing too😂😂😂

It was really funny、but also cute、and it was my first time seeing Ishida-san with her fringe up so I was really impressed〜…！

...

Then later at my individual event you all said 「Seeing Ako-chan always energises me」、which felt kinda strange！

The fact that there are people who say that about me makes me super happy and it makes me realise that I really am an idol！

...

I Getted 「Motivation for tomorrow」✨

I want to do this again next yearー I'm already so excitedー！

That's all！This has been 【Gettaa Life】！

⋆┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈⋆

T/N News and information has not been translated

⋆┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈⋆

Wellー Today I talked a lot and laughed a lot so I think I'll sleep well tonight…

...

Some of you must have work tomorrow！

Thank you very much for coming to see me this evening！

Go to bed early、and wake up feeling energised tomorrowー‼️

Well then I'll see you tomorrow！This has been YumiGettaa Ako！

Good evening🐰🐰🐰

[dfwdfw]

I truly am enjoying everything too. This is the only chance I'll have to be 600 pounds, and I really want to make sure I appreciate everything I can about it. I'm even enjoying the things that suck about being 600 pounds! It's a little odd to realise that I'm enjoying being this out of shape, this awkward, this amount of difficulty getting up, getting around, getting dressed, but it's part of being 600 pounds. Appreciating my shortness of breath is as easy as appreciating my massive gut.

If I'm enjoying the downside of being fat, I'm absolutely reveling in good stuff! Feeling my folds slide over each other, even as I'm sitting 'still' is one of those pleasures that even the mildly obese will never be able to appreciate. And while every fat guy and girl knows what it's like to ripple and jiggle when you walk, they'll never know how the harmonic rhythms of 600 pounds can completely take control of you.

600 pounds! I've been living with that number for a few days now, and it still gives me a little shiver when I think about it! 600 pounds! That's huge. I'm huge! I'm 600 pounds!

While I've known this was coming for a long time, and I was worried that the anticipation might somehow blunt this, I was wrong. I'm thrilled, this is one of the best things I've ever felt. I thought that I wouldn't really 'feel 600', given that it's just one pound more than the 599 I'd been at, but KNOWING that I'm 600 pounds, knowing that I'm supremely fat, knowing that I've reached a titanic size, it really hits home. I DO feel 600, which is far different from feeling 599+1 pounds.

What does being 600 mean? It means that my belly is big. Really big. When I look down, I see my belly. It forces my legs apart, it piles up between my legs, it flows forward ahead of me. It pulls down on me, it's almost like I'm attached to my belly, instead of my belly being attached to me.

What does being 600 mean? It means that I can eat anything I want. My appetite has actually increased since Wednesday! I've been eating like crazy to get to this point and suddenly it feels like I was just getting warmed up. Hunger? What's that? I don't let myself feel hunger! Craving? Craving is when you've got a deep desire for something, a desire that can be satiated by having it. I'm past craving, I want things, and when i get them, I want more. And not just one thing, no no no, I want everything. I want it all, and I want it now!

What does being 600 mean? It means that gravity and I have an understanding. Seeing that needle spin right around the scale, seeing it stop at the very last hash mark made me suddenly feel that, yes, I'm not just fat, I'm HEAVY. 599 pound Ian could still get around okay, but 600 pound Ian? Why get up? Why fight gravity? Isaac Newton discovered this wonderful force that acts on me like it acts on so few people. I'm pulled down towards the Earth with incredible force, and I enjoy it. I don't have to fight gravity, it has me in it's warm, tender embrace. From the tips of my toes to the top of my head, from my recessed navel to my extended rear end, I can feel gravity coursing through me; and it is good.

[wri0thesley]

Hey Nat, I'm kinda blaming you for my budding infatuation with Nanami and I was wondering if I may request Nanami and his s/o having their first kiss? It doesn't have to be long but I'm just feeling soft and with the way you write him it sounds like a treat once this reserved, professional man finally allows himself to give in

oh anon i am so... so very soft.... you cannot blame me for the nanami desire. he is simply irresistible. 

date night - nanami x reader (3k)

you’re nervous about your first date with nanami.

warnings: none. fluffy, soft. neutral reader, some mentions of food and alcohol.

You cannot help but be nervous about tonight.

Your friends have made fun of you, talking about your hot date – Gojo thumping you on the back, Shoko looking at you with her tired eyes but a smirk on her face. Neither of them really get it, you don’t think – to them, Nanami is their former junior who is just a little too serious for his own good. A gloomy, stoic presence who they trust implicitly due to the good head on his shoulders, but who they do not really see as ‘a potential romantic match’. They know that you’ve been harbouring a crush on the former salaryman for months, and they’ve already tried to warn you off him.

“He can be so boring,” Gojo had said, swinging an arm around your shoulders. “Let me set you up with someone instead!”

Your face had heated up at the idea that Gojo didn’t trust you to make your own romantic decisions, but he was already halfway through listing the name of every eligible bachelor he knew (and a few who he said ‘weren’t eligible, but they probably could be, for you!’). You’d been able to do nothing but listen politely as you’d walked with him to his classroom, occasionally gathering strange looks from the students that were milling around in the corridors.

“Think about it!” He’d cried to you as he’d stepped into his bare classroom (you hardly ever see him doing any actual classwork in there; mainly, you see him lying on top of desks and making fun of his students) and greeted the three first years waiting for him. “You don’t wanna be stuck ironing Nanami’s socks for the rest of your life!”

You hope his students don’t hear him, as you decide to go for a walk outside to clear your head.

You and Nanami have been dancing around the idea of maybe possibly being something more than friends for weeks. You’ve felt it, in the brush of his hand against yours, the way that his eyes seem to soften and his tiredness seems to lift when you’re near him. You’ve felt it, as you’ve passed him a cup of coffee and he’s relished the warmth emanating from the cup. In the soft way he speaks to you.

You’ve felt it when he’s held your hand as the two of you have walked together, not saying anything. In his scarf wrapped around your neck, smelling like him.

What you haven’t done, is go on a date.

And perhaps this isn’t a date the way you’d once have dreamed about it. You’re going over to Nanami’s place; he’s going to cook a meal for you, the two of you are going to catch up after he’s been gone on a mission for almost a week -  the two of you are going to watch a foreign film he’s been able to get hold of, that you’ve been saving to watch with one another. You’re going to perhaps have a glass of wine together, or two--

You kind of do want to be stuck ironing Nanami’s socks for the rest of your life.

It sounds so silly when you say it aloud! You haven’t even kissed him, just brushed fingers and held hands and saved each other’s lives whilst on exorcisms together. But whenever you close your eyes and imagine your future, Nanami is always there, right beside you.

You breathe in deeply. You have to ignore what Gojo and Shoko and everyone have been saying. They’ve known Nanami for longer than you – they were his upperclassmen, after all, and you suppose it’s traditional to make fun of and quash your younger classmates a little. You just need to think about what you want, and what Nanami himself may want. Plucking uselessly at your clothes, nerves fizzing in your stomach, you elect to ignore the anxiety gnawing at you until you’re at least outside of Nanami’s front door.

Then, you tell yourself, then, I’ll allow myself to panic a little bit. Seeing Nanami’s calm, handsome face always calms me down. The minute he answers the door, I’ll forget that I was even nervous, and everything will be just as it should.

It doesn’t stop you worrying, as you get dressed and try and fluff your hair and rearrange all of your accessories whilst you get ready. It’s just an evening at his house, you try and keep telling yourself. He’s not expecting me to show up like a runway model, he’d probably hate that anyway--

Still. Having a crush on somebody is never easy, and Nanami can be so utterly unreadable at times, that you get dressed and undressed twice more before you settle on something in between casual and formal; that looks like you’ve made an effort, without looking like you agonised for hours to figure out what the level of effort should be. You’re clutching a bottle of wine and standing outside of his door three minutes early, wondering if he’s the kind of man who gets annoyed if you are there too early.

The door swings open, and Nanami is there, leaning on the door frame. He’s breathtakingly handsome, in casual clothes – an expensive looking sweater in soft grey that gives just a peek at the column of his throat, cuffed jeans. You’ve never seen him look so . . . relaxed. And the fact that he’s looking at you, his lips barely tilting, his tired eyes just a little turned up at the corners.

“You look nice,” he tells you, and you thank God that you went with this outfit. You hold out the bottle of wine for him, and his smile breaks wider as he looks at it. “You didn’t need to bring me anything, you know. I’m happy to be the provider this evening.”

“It’s-- it’s polite!” You insist, and Nanami steps aside to allow you into his house. He’s very proper, and you’d wanted to impress him – you think the young lady who had served you in the specialist store you’d anxiously entered had sensed your worry, and had been very kind as she’d picked something for you she was certain you’d like.

“You made a good choice,” he tells you, as he invites you into his hallway and you gratefully pull off your shoes. “This one looks fine--”

“I didn’t really choose it,” you admit. “I let the experts do it.”

He laughs, the sound like an early spring morning. You don’t think anybody else hears him laugh like that, and the comfort that the two of you share makes you feel soft and warm.

“Even more admirable, then,” he says. “Most people we know would just barrel in guns blazing and insist they knew the right way to do things.”

You both share a secretive smile, your cheeks warming. You can feel tension draining out of you the longer you spend in Nanami’s company. Something about him just sets you at ease.

When you’d first met him, you’d been frightened of him. He seemed so gloomy and intense, so utterly focussed on his goals – when you had tried to speak to him, he had brushed you off with short one word answers and you’d caught him looking at you when your back was turned as if he was waiting for you to slip up.

But as time had worn on . . . as time had worn on, Nanami’s edges had softened. You’d realised that he was willing to talk, when the participant had proved themselves to be worth talking to. He’d told you once, shrugging, that most jujutsu sorcerers just tended to be . . . odd.

“Not you, though,” he’d said, and your heart had leapt in your chest. “Well. You’re not odd in any way that isn’t charming.”

He’s not usually the kind of man who heaps praise on other people; that little compliment, you had carried with you like a flame in your heart. The first time he had held your hand, he hadn’t said anything. The first time he had walked you home, and met you for coffee in a morning a half hour before you were due to be at the scene of an exorcism; Nanami Kento shows that he cares about you in a hundred different little ways that aren’t as simple as telling you it out and out. You admire that about him. You’re so used to putting your foot in your mouth.

“Come sit at the table,” he says, and you follow him obediently. His house is tastefully decorated, somewhere between modern and traditional; he has shelves of books everywhere, and that makes you smile. You’ve heard him say, sighing; “When I’m done with all this, I’ll finally have time to get around to reading them.” The shelf in the very corner of the dining area is the only one that looks well-thumbed; even from here, you can see that it’s where he keeps his recipe books.

“I hope you’ll like it,” you settle into the chair that he pulls out for you. He moves into the kitchen with purpose, grabbing serving dishes and utensils and juggling them with a precision that makes you admire him all the more. “I’m very glad you were on time. It’s the kind of dish that needs to be eaten at the exact right moment.”

He whips the cover off the main dish.

You knew that Nanami was a foodie. His instagram is full of pictures of various places and treats he’s eaten – with a particular focus on adorable baked goods, especially bread, that had made you feel warm inside when you’d noticed. Still, the spread that he’s laid out before you would not look out of place in the most high-class of restaurants; the kind that you’d never had the money to afford to eat in, and you’d have been afraid of showing yourself up at the tables of. You stare at it, mesmerised; the vegetables, so bright and colourful and steaming, lovingly presented – the glaze of the meats, the bowls full of side-dishes that you can’t quite recognise.

There’s an anxiety in his face when he looks at you.

“Sorry,” he says, quietly. “I think I probably over-estimated. And over-compensated, I suppose, for not taking you out to a restaurant--”

“No,” you say, quickly. “It looks delicious. I’m glad you invited me. It’s just . . . a lot.”

“Yes,” his eyes rove over the table. “There are only two of us.”

“It’ll make good left-overs,” you suggest, and he brightens.

“That should have been my line,” he tells you as he retrieves the wine you’d brought. You can see that there was already a bottle chilling in a bucket by the table, but Nanami’s face is affectionate as he pops the cork and pours some into the wine glass by your plate. “I’m supposed to be the responsible one.”

“Sorry for stealing your thunder,” you take a sip of the wine.

“Just as long as you don’t make a habit of it.”

The food really is delicious. You could easily have had seconds, or even thirds – on an ordinary day. A day in which your stomach isn’t churning from how alone the two of you are. There’s a buzz in the air that isn’t quite tension; more, it’s a promise that there’s more yet to come. You and Nanami laugh over dinner, the conversation surprisingly easy when the knot in your insides is so tight. He talks about his old job, and you talk about your own adventures before you’d ended up in Tokyo – he smiles, and laughs, more than you’ve ever seen him do.

He seems so much more at home here. That’s silly, considering it is his home – but somehow, there’d always been an image of Nanami in your head as serious and unforgiving with his tie very tight and his suits perfectly pressed even when he was relaxing in his own rooms.

That image is quickly wiped away, by the way he looks as he rolls up the sleeves of his sweater to take the dishes away.

“Let me help you wash up,” you try and say, but he waves you away.

“I’ll leave them for after you’ve gone,” he says. “I’m not going to ask a guest to do that. Or maybe I’ll even be bold; leave them for in the morning.” His smile makes you feel weak at the knees, this time – a spot of pink high on those sharp cheekbones. Is he blushing, or has his face gone rosy from the wine?

The two of you migrate into the living room. His television is large, but not ostentatiously so; a row of DVDs are neatly in the cabinet beneath it, mainly drama films, period films and some foreign prestige box sets. The movie the two of you have been talking about is one of those – a Danish film about an ageing detective who takes on one last case. You had originally planned to see it together, when it made it to Tokyo cinemas; but one thing had lead to another, and before you could both get the schedules to work out it had gone.

He places the DVD into the player and you can’t help but stare at him; how the soft material of the sweater clings to his broad shoulders, how the jeans seem to emphasise his ass – he’s always in slacks, you’ve never really had the chance to ogle it before, but seeing it in front of you now you suddenly understand why he keeps it covered. Who knows what riots it might incite, if it were just out and about for anyone to see?

“You’re staring,” Nanami turns his head slightly, catching your eye. Heat rushes to your face – but he keeps your eyes pinned with his own for a moment, before deliberately dragging them down the length of you, sat on the sofa. You feel hot and warm and bothered by the way he smiles afterwards, as if he is saying that he likes what he’s seeing too. “You don’t need to be sneaky about it. I don’t mind.”

You swallow, your throat suddenly going very dry. Nanami moves across the room, sitting on the sofa beside you. Heat seems to be radiating off of him; there’s a comfort in having him next to you.

“You look uncomfortable,” he says, five minutes into the movie. He leans back, an arm coming to rest on the back of the sofa behind you. “You can lean on me, you know. I don’t mind.”

He looks inviting. His head is tipped to one side as he meets your eyes; there’s no challenge in his. Just a softness. A quiet affection. Perhaps a touch of nervousness – of trepidation, that you’ll refuse the offer. You hesitantly sidle closer, leaning your head against his side. His scent wraps around you; freshly cleaned laundry, peppermint, coffee, spices, some of the wine from earlier--

You fair go dizzy at it all, but not as dizzy as you go when the arm on the back of the sofa wraps around you, his fingers resting on your shoulder. How are you supposed to concentrate on anything, with him so close to you? With everything about him making you feel like you’re on a roller-coaster climbing upwards and upwards, hurtling towards the inevitable?

You try – oh, you really do try – to keep your eyes on the film and the subtitles scrolling across the bottom of the television. But the aged detective is not half as interesting as Nanami; as the way he focusses on the screen, as his face bathed in the light. As his hand, as it gently starts to stroke over your shoulder, as if he’s barely aware he’s doing it. As his tongue, as it darts out to nervously lick at his lips.

“You’re staring at me,” he says, and you flinch that he’s noticed. His head turns, pinning you with the full force of his gaze. “Are you not enjoying it? We can turn it off?”

How do you answer that?

The real answer: ‘I’m not enjoying it because I can’t concentrate on anything other than you, and how badly I want to be brave enough to kiss you’, feels too bare and bold. You bite your lip.

Nanami leans in closer to you, so close that you can see the flush on his cheeks. The slightly ruffled hairs falling over his forehead. You can count his eyelashes, almost--

“I’m not sure what’s going on either,” he admits, softly. “And I can speak Danish.”

The arm not around your shoulders moves, resting on your waist. You can barely breathe. He’s so close to you; so gorgeous, in the light. All of that former salaryman indifference seems to have gone; he’s not cold any longer, but boiling hot. You’ve been watching it slowly strip away from him since you met him, you think, but tonight might be the first time he’s been Kento Nanami with no pretension.

Nervous about his food, even though he knows he’s an excellent cook. Blushing as he realises you’re checking him out. Almost trembling, as his hand slides up and he cups your cheek like you’re made of porcelain and he’s afraid he might drop and shatter you at any moment. You blink up at him, honey-slow, so dazed by his touch and his presence you can barely make sense of what’s happening.

“I’m going to kiss you,” Nanami says, as a warning. Even now, he seems to think you might pull away. But you cannot, you do not; you just press yourself closer into him, your voice coming out very soft and small as you whisper;

“Please do.”

He does not need to be asked twice. His lips are so soft against yours. The wine clings to them, intoxicating and heady. The hand on your cheek tips your face further up, so he can keep his mouth pressed against you so sweetly. You pull back, your heart pounding.

“Ah, I’m sorry,” he’s saying, almost immediately, nervous that you have changed your mind – but all you do is free your arms, so you can wrap them about his neck and pull him in closer, to devour him the way you’ve wanted to for months.

The movie plays on, forgotten.

[strawberry-nugget]

Bnha characters as things I've said or have been said to me

A/n: halfway through writing this, I realised many things have been said to me in a very mean way, I had just filtered them in my brain to the point everything seems funny now. Fear not, these are just super out of context things that are very humorous.

Disclaimer: minors dni, every character depicted is over 18 years of age.

Warnings: mentions of periods, spoilers for the amazing spiderman 2 (I believe), language, mhhhm if you find anything else kindly let me know so I can put it in the warnings

Uraraka (to Aoyama): we don't all have to like Big Time Rush just because you do! 

—

Denki: I'm going to give this dog my lunch

Bakugo: don't, have you ever seen a dog eat cheese puffs? 

Denki: yes... No?

—

Jirou, accidentally leaking during her period

Sero: WHAT'S WITH ALL THAT BLOOD

Jirou: i- ah, cut my hand? Uh? Yeah I guess?! I cut my hand

Sero: SHOW ME YOUR HAND WE HAVE TO STOP THE BLEEDING, EVERYONE! JIROU'S HAND IS BLEEDING

—

Amajiki: how do you tongue someone? 

Kirishima: it's like? An?? Octopus?? 

Amajiki: octopus? 

Kirishima: in like, texture and stuff

Amajiki: wait what? 

Kirishima: just get your tongue in their mouth it's not hard

Amajiki: why octopus tho i-

—

Reporter: Deku, who do you think is going to make it to the next big 5 of the hero charts? 

Shoto oh, oh, can I say? 

Deku: obviously my- well yes shoto you may say your own guesses, 

Shoto: *passionately swaying back and forth while singing 'I don't want to miss a thing'*

Deku: shoto? Shoto uhmm we're waiting

Shoto: OHHHHH

—

Mina, texting Bakugo: I'm never taking you along with me next time I do my nails. 

—

Mirko: stop being so pretty- oh my god did a fucking horse just turn around to stare at you? 

Hawks: I'm pretty sure I just caught its attention while passing by, calm your tits

—

Denki: which celebrity would you sleep with? 

Bakugo: none

Denki: what? 

Bakugo: You heard me. None

Denki: even if they paid you? 

Bakugo: yeah.. I'm never having sex so good luck with fishing an answer out of everyone else

—

Deku: uh that's actually incorrect, the joker doesn't have a backstory and by assigning him one you're taking all the essence away from his character. Justifying the acts of a canonically psychopathic serial killer with a fixation on a bunch of people by giving him a conventionally moral and excusable story to make him relatable is against the idea of why he's still who he is and that's what's wrong with our society. I think we are willing to excuse villains if they have a heartbreaking backstory but the point with Joker is that he doesn't have one so nice try making him be someone who could ever be salvaged. Now if you open the killing joke by Alan Moore and Frank Miller you will see that Batman is also of same nature, although in his face we find someone we can and should feel sympathy for-

—

Tsuyu watching spiderman with Bakugo and Sero: what's coming out of her nose? 

Bakugo: blood. She's literally dying

Sero: BRO!

Tsuyu: And why is it coming from her nose? 

Sero: she hit her head so that's? Natural? 

Tsuyu? Didn't she hit the back of her head? 

Bakugo: LET ME WATCH THIS SCENE IN PIECE OH MY GOD

—

Hawks: First of all, uncross your arms. You're in defense mode and I'm not attacking you… right now. We'll see what happens in a while 

—

Momo: I didn't mean it when I said don't text me back if you don't make a move on them. Text me back I miss you. 

—

Jirou: just because I went to see black Panther with you does not mean we're together

—

Koda: yes, I am gonna carry this dog until we find a place for it to pee and then I'm carrying it back, is that so hard to grasp

—

Tokoyami: I just realised that the joke with not being able to not see John Cena is because it's a pun with his name

Kirishima: I'm pretty sure it's because of a move of his

Tokoyami: you seem to know about this stuff. I trust you

—

Iida: wake up! Now! Were in a club and you screamed that this is a nice piece of broken glass and you run your finger over it? Are you insane? 

Uraraka: but its-

Iida: DON'T FALL ASLEEP, NO DON'T TOUCH THE GLASS AGAIN

—

Mina: wait- deku is NOT your boyfriend? 

Uraraka: no!? 

Mina: I thought you two had SOMETHING going on? 

Uraraka: in his head? 

Mina: HE- ISN'T HE LIKE IN LOVE WITH YOU? 

Uraraka: wait what? 

—

Toga: I thought you were a bitch when I met you, I put on il ballo del la qua and you turned it off. I can't trust anyone who doesn't want to dance to this song! 

Shigaraki: maybe I'm just emo okay? Otherwise I'm harmless. Also. I was dressed as a vampire, I had to maintain my image at all costs

—

Dabi: *sings grenade by bruno Mars in every small gathering of the Lov and forces everyone to listen*

—

Aoyama, only listening to 5sos for four days: momo can you please buy me the 5sos book for my birthday? 

—

If you ask for part two I am simply going to expose how many dumb bitch moments or trauma I have which idk if it's humorous content. Anyways... Who wants to see bnha and shy things I do next?

[heloisedaphnebrightmore]

Play with me [Billy Russo x Reader] - Requested [15+]

Title: Play with me Pairing: Billy Russo x Female!Reader Word count: 3.3k Published: 13 June 2021 Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore Notes: There's no smut in it, but it is quite suggestive so I think it deserves the 15+ rating. Warnings: Suggestive phrases, mention of alcohol and drinking Summary: Once again you find yourself dragged to a fancy event as part of your work by none other than Billy himself. Your boss seems to be enjoying your discomfort, finding entertainment in your grimaces and sulking comebacks. That is until you decide to turn his little game against him. Request: [x] Prompts requested by @sunrisefairy for my celebration event.

Billy Russo x Reader Fluff #19 - “It’s not a double date. We’re just third and fourth wheeling.” Spicy #20 - “Are you flirting with me?” Spicy #39 - “I’m a little drunk and a little horny.”

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You've never been big on attending all those fancy events your company has been hired to work at, but Billy always said it was a good way to build connections. Not once have you found yourself in a pretty little ballgown, following your boss around with a stone-cold expression, silently trying to suffocate him with your murderous gaze. You were hired to be a security agent not a peacock, but Billy didn't seem to mind the invisible daggers your eyes shot at him, if anything, by the smug grin across his face, he appeared to be enjoying the situation.

Just like many times before, this event was organised by one of his clients as well and he had been invited, along with a plus one to your utter disappointment. Though it sounded like you were supposed to be guests, in the end the man made it clear that he wanted Billy to have his back and his people to be blended in the crowd. Therefore, most of the night, you and Billy have been following around the old man, some no name politician you couldn't even recognise with his wife on his arm, smiling like a wild beast.

"You know, if you think about it, this could be our first date," Billy smirked as his eyes scanned the room. "It's like a grand double date," he smirked, earning an annoyed huff from you.

"It's not a double date, I wouldn't even go out with you if you were the last person on this planet," you groaned. "We are just— third and fourth wheeling for the sole purpose of their security," you nodded towards the couple in front of you.

"If denial makes your sensitive little heart feel better about your attraction towards me, who am I to object," he chuckled. "Though I have to admit, that silk dress on you makes it very hard for me to focus," he scanned your body, his gaze studying every single inch as though he could see through the thin material. His eyes dwelled longer on the high cut design that ran up to the top of your thigh, exposing your bare legs. His intent gaze burned your skin, your ears feeling as though they were on fire before realisation hit you.

"Hold on a minute, are you flirting with me?" You asked incredulously.

"As smart as you are, I'm surprised it took you this long to realise," he replied with his smug grin growing wider.

"Wipe it off," you scoffed at him as he grabbed your arm, rougher than you expected and linked it with his, patting the back of your hand. You walked around the ballroom with him on your side as he shook hands with all kinds of men, each seemingly interested in every breath Billy took, almost as though he was more important than the old man in front of you.

"Why? If it wasn't for your distaste in all these events, you'd be drooling over me by now," he chuckled playfully, offering you a subtle wink, before he turned back to the sea of people with his head held high, his body straightening in an authoritative manner.

"You are delusional," you hissed, teeth gritting in frustration.

"Right, I guess you just love staring at me then. Though I'm not surprised, I'm certainly good to look at," he huffed.

"No and No," you scoffed with a grimace. "And remove that shit-eating grin from your face already," you retorted as Billy clicked his tongue.

"Pretty lips, but such a dirty mouth," he let out a low, throaty laugh as he leaned closer, his lips brushing your ear, his warm breath sending a shiver through your body. "You know, I have a couple of ideas what you could use that mouth for," he replied in a suggestive tone, arching a single brow as he pulled back.

"Oh, do you now?" You offered him a playful smile as your eyes looked him up and down before your gaze met his again. "Unfortunately for you, I'm not interested," you shook your head, trying to act as though his offer didn't affect you, as though his body so close to you didn't force your heart into a dangerous pace. Though mostly you found it easy to ignore his teasing, you had to admit a part of you was indeed inclined to know more about where his mind was wandering off to.

"Ouch," he placed a hand in front of his chest, acting as if he was indeed in pain before he rearranged himself. "Your loss, I guess," he shrugged nonchalantly, earning an annoyed eye roll from you.

As the night went on, you tried to ignore the music in the background and focus on your work. Your eyes scanned the gigantic room as you shimmied through the sea of people dancing in pairs whilst Billy followed right behind you, clearing his throat. Looking back over your shoulder, you realised his eyes weren't on the people surrounding you or establishing eye contact with the rest of the team. His gaze fell lower, lower than you expected.

"Do you like the view?" You asked, arching a brow as he finally stopped staring at your backside and lifted his gaze, running his tongue across his bottom lip.

"What can I say that dress seems to enhance your beauty in all the right places," he smirked, earning a scoff from you. "Hey, can't I compliment you?" He raised his hands innocently, but you didn't fall for it, his proud grin spread wider as he ran his eyes all over you again.

"Pig," you spat as you finally reached the end of the crowd and stole a glass of champagne from a tray one of the servers walked around with.

"You are not supposed to be drinking," he gave you a cold look.

"I can't handle you sober," you chugged the content of the glass in a swift movement, earning a loud huff from him.

"That's not very professional," he replied as he stepped closer and placed a hand on your waist, tugging you closer in his side.

"Well, screw professionalism," you huffed as you felt the alcohol hit you. It was already warm inside, but with the alcohol, you felt your cheeks flush. Your eyes wandered to your side, where his big palm cupped your side, his touch radiating further warmth into your already heated body. "Is it just me—," you asked as you met his gaze, "or your hand seems to wander way too carelessly on my body tonight," you squinted suspiciously.

"I'm just making sure you are safe," he shrugged nonchalantly.

"I'm not the client, you know that, right?" you huffed as you grabbed his hand, took it off your waist and walked towards another room, searching for the old man, before you heard a voice in your earpiece, letting you know about his whereabouts. Heading to his position, you felt Billy's presence right behind you again. You halted your steps and turned around, folding your arms in front of your chest.

"You were not supposed to be drinking," he repeated himself with a stern expression across his face, one that told you this time he wasn't playing around, he was indeed unhappy with you. But instead of apologising or acknowledging his presence for that matter, you simply ignored him and looked around the room. "Do you even realise that I'm your boss?" He frowned, looking at you with a questioning gaze. "I feel like I have been way too lenient with you," he groaned as you stared him down. You caught sight of a waiter heading your way, so you quickly snatched another glass from his tray and gulped down the champagne.

"So? What are you going to do about it?" You asked in a mocking tone, smirking at the man as he chewed on his bottom lip. The words escaped your vocal cords before you could even protest. In normal circumstances you would have never dared to say them out loud, but the alcohol in your system, the two glasses of champagne seemed to do the trick. As you weren't big on drinking and barely had any alcohol, it hit you harder than someone who was used to its strength.

"I could fire you in this instance," he hissed, his tone low and warning. You took a step towards him, barely leaving a couple of inches between you as you looked up at him.

"Then why don't you?" You asked, arching a brow, waiting for a reply. "Come on, why don't you, huh?" You taunted him. "What did you expect? That I'm going to beg you to let me keep my job? Humour me, Russo," you huffed, this time wearing the same shit-eating grin he wore before.

"You are playing with fire," he spoke through gritted teeth as he sneaked an arm around your waist and pulled you flush against his chest, forcing you to lift your head higher to be able to look up at him. "I don't appreciate that tone," he continued in a low, dark voice, one that made your knees buckle, the air stuck in your lungs. "If you want to get my attention, then you can stop, you have had it for a while," he growled as he brushed his lips against your earlobe, his breath fanning the sensitive skin behind your ear. "But if it's for the sole purpose of pissing me off, I advise you to cut the bullshit, because I don't like your stupid little game," he squeezed your side as he pulled back, his jaw clenched.

To be fair, you weren't sure why you were taunting him, but there was something about him when he was frustrated, when you knew he was just a push away from snapping. You never dared to cross that line, nor did you want to do it now, but that borderline dangerous look in his eyes made you feel weak, his strong arm around you rough and warning, still you couldn't stop yourself from poking the sleeping lion. "So, you can play with me, but I can't do the same? Don't you think that's hypocritical?" You scoffed, folding your arms in front of your chest, creating even more space between you. There was a moment of silence as Billy studied your face, trying to decide if you were serious or you had gone completely mental.

"You are drunk, you are not making any sense," he scoffed as he got hold of your arm and started dragging you towards a closed door. As he opened it, you found yourself in some sort of a lounge with a sofa on the opposite wall of the room, an armchair on each side and a small coffee table right in front of it. The dim light and empty room created a rather welcoming feeling after the loud ballroom. "Sit down and take a minute for yourself, I will be back in a second. Hopefully by then you will make more sense," he threw the words at you as he left and closed the door behind himself.

You didn't attempt to take a seat and lounge around, you didn't want to sit down and do nothing, though the slight dizziness you felt urged you to do so. For a second you debated if you should listen to your instincts and indeed rest your tired limbs, but you shook yourself out of the thought and instead wandered around the room, looking at the paintings on the wall. Each art was of the same man— the one you were supposed to be protecting— wearing the finest of clothing you have ever seen. Rich folks, you scoffed at the thought, but before you could have dwelled on them any longer, the door opened. Without looking over your shoulder, Billy's cologne filled your nostrils. "Did you come back to police me?" You said without turning to look at him.

"It seems I didn't give you enough time to clear your head," he mused.

"My head is completely clear," you shot back at him, stumbling a bit as you felt slightly lightheaded. He stood in front of the closed door, hands tucked in the pockets of his trousers as he casually leaned against the wooden panels.

"I can see that," he scoffed, this time with a tiny smile in the corner of his mouth, running his eyes up and down on your body, his gaze darkening.

"I'm not drunk," you pointed at his chest as you walked up to him in haste, halting your steps right in front of him, leaving a barely visible gap between the two of you, feeling the heat radiate from his body.

"And I believe that," he replied in a mocking tone. "Though it leaves me with a question. It seemed you had some difficulty standing on your own two feet just a minute ago. What was that about that then?" His smug grin grew wider, knowing he was right. Indeed, there were some side effects to the alcohol you have consumed.

"Fine," you replied, jaw clenched in anger, teeth gritting as you held yourself back. "I'm— I might be— a little drunk," you cleared your throat as though admitting it caused you physical pain.

"Okay, now we are getting somewhere," he said as he lifted his hand and brushed his fingertips along the curve of your shoulder, slowly following the path down to your wrist. "So, why did you drink then?" He asked, with a slight amount of curiosity.

"You pissed me off," you shrugged nonchalantly, earning a chuckle from Billy as he kept repeating his movements, running his fingers along your arm, causing goosebumps to appear on your skin, which he did not miss.

"That's not very professional, is it?" He asked, teasing you as his strokes moved from your shoulder to your collarbone, forcing your breath to turn shallow. He lifted his eyes, meeting your lustful gaze, only to caress his ego further. "If I didn't know you better, I'd say you are not only drunk, but that smart little head of yours might just be filled with some very— very dirty thoughts," he chuckled as you swallowed nervously, his palm cupping your face, running his thumb along your lip.

He wasn't wrong though. There were thoughts that you wished never to voice, thoughts that had him standing in front of you naked, completely exposed, your hands running across his toned chest, his mouth nipping at the soft skin of your neck. You licked across your lips as the thought became even more vivid, his grumbling tone forcing you to draw your thighs together, needing some sort of a friction. He arched a brow at the movement, a cocky grin spreading across his face. "It seems I'm right once again and you are not even trying to deny it," he breathed as he planted his other hand on your waist and drew you closer. "Tell me, where is that pretty head of yours wondering to?" He let out a low chuckle, but you didn't answer, you didn't dare to say it. "Let me guess," he leaned down to your ear, tickling your neck with his beard, causing a knot to appear in the pit of your stomach, your breathing turning ragged, "are you horny?" He let out a low chuckle as he bit your neck, earning a silent squeaking sound from you, his actions 'almost' sobering you up. 'Almost', because within seconds you find yourself leaning into his touch.

"I—," you tried to reply, but your throat seemed too dry, your heart was beating so heavily, you could hear the drumming of your own pulse in your ears. "I maybe— just maybe a little horny," you breathed as he ran his lips along the curve of your neck, forcing your eyes to flutter shut. Before you realised your own actions, you cupped his cheeks and pulled him away from your neck, pressing your lips to his, stunning him for a mere moment, before he returned your advances. The kiss was hungry, teeth tugging at lips, tongues fighting for dominance, but that was what you needed. You pressed your body against his, closing any remaining gap between the two of you, earning a low growl from Billy. He grabbed your hips, holding onto you as though he was trying to ground himself, keeping himself sober in the haste of that heated kiss.

"I think we should stop," he breathed as he finally found his strength to leave your lips. A deep frown spread across your brow as you studied him.

"Why?" You asked in confusion, knowing— feeling his body's reaction to you.

"Think whatever you want of me, I can be a lot of things, but I like to think that touching someone without their consent is wrong. I believe we have already done more than we were supposed to," he cleared his throat as he tried to push you back gently, but rather firmly and you obliged.

"I'm giving you consent, Russo," you replied in disbelief.

"You are drunk, so I'm not sure you are," he shook his head. A loud huff left your lungs as you walked up to the sofa and sat down, placing one leg over the other, crossing them as you sunk deeper into the cushions.

"Okay," you scoffed. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I said I was a little drunk. You see little is the key word here," you tilted your head, hoping he would understand where you were going with this. "As you can see, I'm capable of talking, walking, thinking and I'm certainly not crawling on the floor, am I?" You arched a brow, watching his expression turn contemplating. "I will make this easy for you, Russo," you continued, your tone inviting. You lifted your leg from the other and spread them just enough, so the opening of your dress fell between your legs, the high cut design revealing your bare thighs. Seemingly it was enough of an encouragement for Billy to tense up and swallow visibly. "So, what's it going to be?" You asked as a mischievous smile grew wider across your face just as you slowly started closing your legs. Before he could even stop himself, he pounced on you, kneeling between your legs, stopping you from closing the gap as he pressed his lips against yours, ready to take you up on your offer.

His mouth attached to yours hungrily, grabbing your thighs as he pushed you further into the sofa. You busied yourself with his clothes and started untying his tie and unbuttoning his shirt, impatiently trying to pull the material out of his trousers. You threw his tie on the floor, soon followed by his shirt, before you pushed him down beside you and crawled into his lap, earning a groan from him. "You little beast," he grinned at you as he grabbed the back of your neck and pulled you down to meet him halfway in a heated kiss, his hands grabbing your ass, pulling you further down onto his lap, his kisses trailing down to your neck, leaving you panting, whispering his name in your half-clear state of mind.

"Just so you know, I still hate you," you breathed against the crook of his neck as you returned the satisfying attention he was giving you, nipping on the sensitive skin, earning you a throaty groan from him.

"Yeah, I can feel it," he chuckled as he bucked his hips, causing a gasp to erupt from your lungs. "Let's discuss that after you stop screaming my name in pleasure," he replied through gritted teeth as grabbed your hips and with a swift movement changed your position, throwing you on your back, hovering above you. He studied your dishevelled look with a smug grin across his face, before he pressed his lips to yours again, his hands exploring every part of your body that he didn't have the chance to before, forgetting about everything and anything about the ball on the other side of the safely locked door.

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Taglist is in a reblog from now on.

[toges-wife]

You changed my meaning of life.

Notes: no notes...

Pairing: inumaki x gn!reader

Trigger warnings: suicidal thoughts, insecurities, suicide attempts/ suicide, jealousy.

Toge and you both were the ideal couple in jujutsu high, you always used to fight curses together. You cared about eachother more than everything in this world. You even carried a throat medicine with you if he ever needed it. But sometimes he starts doubting himself.

Like when he sees the way you look at yuuta while talking with him, it was the most heart breaking thing ever. He was indeed jealous of his best friend. Not just jealous because of his best friend. He was jealous of everyone.

Looking at the models made him more insecure about the Relationship, he knew that all of them are "perferct" they have many people who like them. Later on after the whole hard week of stressing himself he decided to ask you out for the movies. He texted you "hello darling, i was thinking can we go to the movies? Please?"

Only to get no as an answer at first he thought it was kind of a joke or something. Then you said "Come to my dorm, we can watch movies alone it would be better, right?" That made him smile and blush at the same time.

Later on he came to your dorm dressing all neat and he looked handsome. It was like he spent days planning for the outfit to wear. He also came with snacks to eat while you watch a movie. "Kelp!" He said as you opened your arms and gave him a warm hug.

You both were laying down and watching a movie, toge was sitting on your lap and you were cuddling him. Seeing such actors made toge feel insecure again.

At first he started trying to distract you from watching the movie, he looked at your eyes and then he cupped your face. "Tsuna tsuna!" He said sadly. "What's wrong sweetheart? Do you need anything?" He looked at you and giggled.

"Call me sweetheart again and focus on me!" He comanded you. "Sweetheart? Why?" You gave him a kiss on his nose then you unzipped his turtleneck giving him kisses on his marks where he liked being kissed. "Still you haven't told me why.." you looked at him upset.

He then realised that it was only because of his cursed speech you did so... even if he felt happy at first, but then he sat next to you he was upset. He hugged you and after you started the movie you looked happy seeing that one actor who made him insecure.

His eyes started getting filled with tears, “am i a pushover? Everyone is forced to be with me.. Even my parents..? They all are embarrassed of me.. ” his thoughts were breaking him.. You were already sleeping when he was crying, so he return to his dorm better than being with you. He wrote almost everything in a note saying:

My dear, i have to leave you... I've always known that I'm not good enough for you. You are pretty so you probably can get any guy you want. I'm not good for you, i can't talk and i forced you to give me attention... I'm such a pushover. Sorry for being in your life... goodbye love. I don't know if you will see me again after this...

His tears were falling on the paper, he was devastated. It wasn't so long till he ended up throwing it in the garbage. Toge then placed a kiss on your forehead covering you with his jacket since he wanted to give you something before he leaves.

Stepping outside of the dorm he continued crying, he was heartbroken. After all you were kinda cold towards him, he loved you but he felt like you don't feel the same way. He felt like you are being forced into liking him and he didn't want that.

But like seriously who needs someone who can't talk with them, and is short, only speaks with onigiri ingredients? You did, you loved every single thing about him. But you couldn't express it much and you even felt guilty about it.

After you woke up you couldn't find toge anywhere in the dorm, you got upset. You knew that it was 2 am but he promised you to stay in your dorm, you found his jacket and wore it then headed to his dorm only to find him crying in his bed.

"Sweetheart? What's wrong?" You rushed to him. But he just ignored you. You sat on his bed and hugged him. "Kelp..." he turned to hug you but you still didn't know what's wrong. "Look at me and be honest. Why did you leave and why are you crying?" He just shook his head not wanting to tell you then after some hours he fell asleep. But you couldn't sleep well knowing that something is wrong.

You looked closely in his room to see if there is a diary or anything but you only found the calendar, luckily you did. You found it with some notes on it and the calendar was trimmed at his birthday. You searched it's meaning and it shocked you. You stared reading the notes

*distance yourself from maki and yuta* *make your friends hate you* *break up with your partner :(* *spread rumours about them to make them hate you* *now you don't have anything to make you stay, sell your properties*

and later on his birthday there was a slightly long note

*apologies for everything in letters and kill yourself, tell your partner how much they mean to you and why you did that. And apologies to yuuta and maki also to your sensei. Don't forget megumi, you always troubled him.*

You stopped reading all of this and you removed all of the notes and took them. "Hey dumbass!" You yelled at toge making him wake up panicking. "OKAKA" you slapped him more than once.

"Stop!" He yelled at you as you did stop. "Why?! Explain those notes!" You said showing him the notes as his eyes got wide opened and started signing *wait, how did you find them?!* he asked while he was crying.

"I felt like there is something wrong... and please don't kill yourself... it will hurt me and your friends too..." you said wiping his tears, "you know... even if you are going through something ... I'm always here to protect you and take care of you. i love you", then he replied signing *I'm not good enough.*

You held toge's hands together pulling them closer to you crying. "No, you are.. you are my whole world... i know that I'm maybe a little harsh on you... but i love you-" you got interrupted of him removing his hands. "Go away..." he said as you did go and leave him alone thinking about everything that happened.

The next day you woke up after crying the whole night on the thought of losing him. You got ready to start a new day, but you didn't really have a great feeling about that. You headed to the classroom were you had your lesson.

Toge didn't show up at that time which made you more worried. After some hours he finally came. He looked like he has been crying too. "Kelp..." he said awkwardly sitting next to you. He felt guilty about last night, it was pretty obvious.

From that day you started following him everywhere, you even took his dorm keys and locked it for him to stay at yours. One day you walked into him laughing at his phone smiling, you were happy to see that. "Hello sweetheart!" You came next to him giving him kisses on his cheeks making him smile even more.

“Sooo wanna go on a date tomorrow? It's your birthday!” toge gave you a hug and nodded as a response. “I'll take you to any place you want and you can buy anything, I'd like to spoil you” you started planning. Little do you know that he was just acting to make you happy..

At his birthday, toge did go out with you and enjoy his time. But he still doubt if you really love him. He felt like he's a mistake since the first year of his life.

You tried your best to make him happy and feel loved. The plush he wanted long time ago? You won it! The food he wanted to try? You gave it to him. Everything he wants was granted! Even time with you!

It was such a long day, and the best way to end it was cuddling! Toge being held by you, what a great feeling! Your hand around his waist, giggling together, it was all he wanted before he dies. All your attention. he suddenly wanted to go to the bathroom. But he didn't.

You heard your dorm room opening and you noticed that his keys are gone. Then you remembered what he planned for... You ran in his dorm and saw him holding a knife. "Toge! Stop it! Don't!" You begged but he didn't listen.

“I'm sorry, thank you for everything.” he smiled at you. “don't come closer” he commands. “Toge! Please!” you begged again suddenly seeing the blood all over the room making you collapse crying.

You had no other choice than calling an ambulance. "Hold on! Please" the tears fell from your eyes. Toge was still aware of what's going on. He moved a bit giving you a paper saying, “in the closet, there is a box containing our memories, i love you lots and I'll continue watching over you” you gasped begging him to hold on again. You couldn't do anything. He was still bleeding.

“dying does feel nice indeed...” he started talking. “so peaceful.” tears fell from his eyes feeling the rest he wanted. You were sitting next to him holding his hand. He got such a precious smile before he left. “tell everyone that I love them” those were his last words.

Toge was happy to die in your arms. It felt nice. His favourite place. The blood continued flowing out of his chest until the last drop. His heart beat stopped with him smiling. All of the things you got together will stay as it is. Memories forever. The ambulance was late. The doctors were sorry.

Sorry for what? You already lost him now. Nothing can be the same again. He changed the meaning of life for you. Really he was everything that keeps you going till that day.

Only if... Only if you paid more attention on him.. You felt responsible for everything now. It was such a burden that isn't easy to let it go. The faces of his parents made you cry the most. They were deeply hurt. You couldn't blame them for putting such burden on you. After all you were his partner.

Maybe you should have cared more? You wished that you never told him no. You wished you can go back in time and prevent yourself from even meeting him. You still love him. His name will be forever remembered.

Perhaps there's a better future waiting for you in the other world?

© toges-wife on tumblr. please do not repost or claim any of my works as yours. That's a crime kids :)

[captains-simp]

@tomy5girls

Fhskdhwksnsns I accidently posted this before I was done writing it 🤡🤡🤡

I love Wanda so the first part took me ages to write but writing soft Carol made this either the messiest or best fic I've ever written

"Do I mean that little to you?"

"Was it all a lie?"

"I think I'm inlove with you."

Warnings: cheating and me fucking around with the MCU timeline regarding when characters are introduced

6.7k words

[ masterlist ]

Buy me a coffee ☕

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Your relationship with Wanda had always been far from perfect. It was evenings like that difficult one that made you reflect on just how many red flags you had ignored. You had chosen to live your life with her in blissful ignorance, thinking it would work out.

But as time went on there were things that were harder to ignore. Things that hurt you to notice, both about Wanda and yourself. You thought they would go away. They only ever got worse.

That night was the final straw. You couldn't deny the issues that had been growing like weeds in your relationship for a year when you walked into your appartment to see Wanda's head between another girl's legs.

You didn't feel mad. Or upset. You felt empty. Empty at the long awaited realisation that you had committed to the wrong thing.

You didn't say anything, too shocked to know what to say and not knowing if you would even be capable of stringing a sentence together.

The woman's eyes flickered open and met yours and in that brief moment you saw the familiar look of lust before it turned to fear. She roughly pushed Wanda away as she looked anywhere but you and moved away from your soon to be ex girlfriend.

Wanda gave her a questioning look before whipping her head around to see you after following the woman's uncontaminated glances. She stood up instantly and straightened her shirt while the woman on the couch got dressed.

"You're home." Was the first thing Wanda said. Yeah. You were definetly done.

"I am." Your mouth was dryer than sandpaper but you somehow managed to say that.

"I should..." The woman muttered as she awkwardly glanced between you and Wanda before rushing past you and out the door.

Neither you nor Wanda spoke for a while. You were still looking at her, searching for any signs of...anything. She didn't meet your eye. She made no attempt to defend herself. To defend your relationship. It was downright heartbreaking.

You needed to sit down, but there was no way you were sitting where Wanda had just been. Not that knowing what Wanda had done on that couch had bothered you before.

You left the hallway to wander aimlessly towards your bedroom, knowing you weren't the only one Wanda had fucked in that bed, but you had never had to see that.

She followed you into the room, more trailing really. There was no urgency to her pace and she still didn't speak. Did she really not care?

You sat down on the bed and stared at the floor, mot knowing what to feel. Wanda didn't sit next to you. She made no move to comfort you. You didn't need comfort, not from her. You needed an explanation.

"When did it start?" You wanted to ask how many, but you already knew the truth would hurt too much. The ones you knew about were enough.

"I don't know." Wanda huffed. She sounded frustrated, as though you were wasting her time. That finally pissed you off.

"I deserve an explanation, Wanda." You said clearly, keeping your voice surprisingly steady as you looked up at her. She still didn't look back.

"What's done is done." She said simply.

"Do I mean that little to you?" Tears sprung to your eyes as you said that. Wondering for the first time if Wanda had really ever cared about you.

When Wanda finally looked at you you wished she hadn't. Her eyes were full of pity, watching you like a stray puppy in the rain. She moved forward and sat down next to you on the edge of the bed.

"I loved you." You didn't fail to notice the past tense, it cut through you like a knife. "But I wasn't ready." You had started dating so soon after Ultron. At the time you knew Wanda was grieving badly, you had questioned if it was best for her to dive into a relationship the way she had in that state.

Her self-confidence and driven nature always put your mind to rest. There were red flags before the relationship had even started.

"When you realised that...you didn't have to stay." Your voice wavered slightly.

"I know that." God the pitifulness was even in her voice.

"So why did you?" You held your breath waiting for that an answer. Wanda took a few seconds to consider that, like she wasn't quite sure herself.

"I like being around you." She sounded truthful, but you didn't allow yourself to believe her.

"When you weren't around them." You couldn't help the bitter tone that crept into your voice. Wanda didn't like that. Thinking she actually had any right to be mad at you.

"Oh for the- we had fun, didn't we? It's not like it was a complete waste of our time!" She exclaimed, standing up to face you.

"I wasn't dating you for fun, Wanda. It was so much more than that. I wasn't just someone for you to fuck like all of those girls, I was your girlfriend!" You felt proud at what you had said. You were right. About all of it. You were especially right to use the past tense. Something you didn't think you could manage to do. But that pride was short lived.

"You were a distraction!" You froze. Every fibre of your being turning ice cold from her words. You and Wanda stared at each other for felt like an eternity. She didn't take it back. There was an unreadable expression painted on her face. You knew it wasn't regret.

That's all you ever were to her? A distraction? Everything you thought you had...

"Was it all a lie?" You whispered. You hated the question. You would hate the answer. But you had to know.

Wanda's expression faulted and for a second the pitifulness returned. It was quickly pushed to the side when she spoke again, remaining stoic.

"Call it what you want." You bit the inside of your mouth in an attempt to stop your bottom lip trembling as you finally looked away.

"I'd like you to go. We're done." You whispered, turning away from her.

She left without another word. Her boots thudding against the floor as she walked away in the purposeful way she failed to show you that night.

The door to your appartment clicked shut before you broke down into tears.

*

You had gotten a hotel room that night, unable to stay in your own home. You couldn't lay in your bed without wondering how many people had been in it. Wondering how fewer it would have been if you had just confronted Wanda about it when you first knew. But you didn't, and those months of heartbreak were finally coming to the surface.

You arranged for time off of work once you got back to your appartment. Once that was done you flipped over the couch cushions, retrieved your toasted pop tarts and sat down to watch your comfort show under a bundle of blankets.

It worked for a while. The plates (yes plural) full of pop tarts and the hours of TV took the edge off of the numbness you were feeling. That was until a text from Carol brought you back to reality.

Care Bear: you okay?

You smiled a little. Carol was definetly something that would provide you with comfort, living up to her nickname as always. But she worked with Wanda, and the last thing you wanted was to make her life awkward.

Carol was your best friend. She was Wanda's friend too. That was how you had met. After Ultron Carol had introduced you to Wanda at one of Tony's parties. She had even been a wingwoman for Wanda, you pondered over what Carol would do if she knew Wanda had cheated.

The blonde had always been protective of you. It was sweet. Especially the small acts she never even noticed she did. Like standing closer to you when you were in a room full of self righteous jerks. Always being the one to catch you when you tripped over thin air, even if she was preciously on the other side of the room. Knowing when you were uncomfortable in social situations and casually taking you away from them in the most subtle manner that didn't cause a scene. You had never been able to confide in anyone like you could with her. Not even Wanda, although that was probably because she never shared either.

You: 👍 :)

Care Bear: --_--

Care Bear: Wanda's here

You bit your lip as your thumbs danced over the keyboard; evaluating the best response. You were surprised Wanda was even at the Avenger's headquarters. You had assumed she would be spending her nights with random hookups for a while rather than just one night. She finally had the full freedom to do that but she went back to the Avenger's Headquarters instead?

You: she okay?

Care Bear: I haven't seen her since she went to her room, doesn't seem to be in a talkative mood

Care Bear: you guys okay? 👀

Carol never liked to pry into yours and Wanda's relationship. She always let you confide in her. But in the cases where it was obvious something had happened between you, she checked in on you in the least subtle ways. Carol was smooth in a lot of way, but that was not one of them. It had become a joke between you and Carol ended up embracing it.

You: we broke up

Care Bear: CHSKSBSKSBAMZBMZDBAL

Care Bear: I'm on my way!!

Care Bear: or I can give you space to mope?

You couldn't help but smile at Carol's messages. Your reply was instant. You would love to have Carol binge shows and eat trash food with you.

You: come mope with me :(

Carol confirmed she was on her way less than a minute later and you got up to toast the last of your pop tarts and get a drink.

You weren't sure how soon Carol arrived on your balcony. You were sure very few things had made you happier than the sight of your goofy friend proudly holding up a multipack of poptarts while dressed in her sweatpants and goose t-shirt. The shirt was one you had gifted her for Christmas one year and if she wasn't wearing her Captain Marvel uniform, she was most likely wearing that shirt.

You got up to open the sliding door for her as you suppressed a chuckle. Carol appearing on your balcony without warning had stopped scaring you around the ninth time it happened. That was about the time you stopped trying to convince her to just use the stairs like everyone else.

As soon as she was in your appartment she threw the box to the couch and enveloped you in a bear hug. You wrapped your arms around her middle and closed your eyes as you held onto her. You smiled at the familiar smell of vanilla and cat hairs, being so easily comforted by it.

"Are you okay?" She muttered into your shoulder.

"I am." You said truthfully. You hadn't slept well the previous night, even at the hotel. You had cried for a while. But the next day you had felt better, as though a weight had been lifted from.your chest. You were still hurting, but you would be just fine.

Carol pulled away and rested her hands on your shoulders as she studied you, trying to find any evidence of a lie. Upon finding none she nodded and smiled at you kindly. That was something you loved about Carol. She never pitied you, even when the worst happened. She was sympathetic and supportive and never condescending. 

"What are we watching?" Carol asked as she picked up the box on the couch and took it over to your toaster. She knew you wouldn't want to talk about Wanda yet. She would wait for you to bring it up. Until then, she would act as though you were moping because you were sick rather than the reality.

You replied to her with your comfort show that she had grown familiar with and sat back down on the couch with the blanket over you. Carol soon returned with two plates of pop tarts (it wasn't like you had eaten anything else) and two hot chocolates. What you really craved was some alcohol but you decided to leave that till later on.

Your blonde friend sat back down next to you when you lifted the blanket for her. She instantly brought her legs up under her and put her arm around you. You easily leant into her and rested your head on her shoulder before she leant her own head on yours.

Neither of you spoke for a while. Carol occasionally laughed at something on the TV and you found yourself smiling at the sound of her laughter more than the show. It had always been contagious.

Wait. Should you of been smiling that much for someone who had walked in on their girlfriend cheating less than 24 hours prior? Probably not. But then again. You had seen it coming. All the signs prior had softened the blow.

"You alright?" Carol asked again as a whisper as she pretended to keep most of her focus on the show.

You hummed in response and fiddled with the edge of the blanket for a while until you spoke.

"She cheated." You muttered. You could feel Carol freeze. Her whole body tensed up making her as stiff as a plank. Her shoulder wasn't as comfy when that happened. "But it's okay." You assured.

Carol took ahold of both your empty plates and placed them on the table before turning her body towards you so she could see you better.

"That's never something that can just be 'okay', y/n." Carol said in a gentle tone.

"I know but...I already knew before... before I saw." You could hear Carol breathing heavily as you avoided her gaze.

"Christ, y/n." She whispered. "Why didn't you ever say anything?"

"I don't know I just...I guess I thought if I ignored it it would go away." Upon reflection you really weren't sure why you never addressed it.

Carol didn't say anything at that. You glanced up nervously to see her looking deep in thought, trying to understand what you meant. Carol was never one to hope things would go away. Her life as a hero had taught her to comfront every obstacle she faced.

"And you saw her..."

"Yeah, I did. I thought I could handle knowing what she was doing behind my back but actually seeing it...it was hard." Carol breathed out hard as though she had been holding her breath and pulled you into another of her infamous bear hugs. You wrapped your arms around her again and squeezed your eyes shut.

The blonde gently stroked your back in soothing circles until you moved away, not wanting to but knowing Carol wouldn't move away first and Lord knows how long you would have ended up staying like that.

"And you're really feeling okay about it?" Carol asked with a slightly furrowed brow, reading your face for any trace of a lie as you spoke.

"Yeah." You smiled assuringly. You didn't feel like telling Carol the rest. About how you had only ever been a distraction to Wanda. But there was something else you wanted to admit. "It was for the best." You started. Carol could tell something more was coming so she sat up a little straighter to show you you had her full attention. "Even before I figured out I what she was doing things just didn't feel entirely right with Wanda. She was great, but it always felt like something was missing." Carol didn't show any reaction to that. She seemed surprisingly stoic, like she was trying to suppress something. You figured it was probably just that she was thinking about what you had said.

"Enough about all that though." You said when Carol hadn't spoken. "You never got to tell me about your super amazing mission last month." Carol's eyes lit up at the mention of her successful mission.

There were some missions she wasn't allowed to talk about. Some she could. And some she could eventually talk about. Her last one was the latter and once she was clear to tell you about it she did, in great detail and the most animated way. It had been one of her best missions and you were incredibly proud. But you were interrupted by a false alarm at the Headquarters before she could finish.

You loved hearing about Carol's work that she was passionate about. You loved hearing how she could handle herself out there. Recalling some of those missions put your mind to rest when you hadn't heard from her in a long time. And you needed the distraction. Carol knew that.

You listened to Carol intently with a smile but the stress and upset of the previous events had you suddenly feeling very tired. Your eyelids began to feel very heavy and your head became empty as you felt yourself drifting off to sleep.

*

You woke up in your own bed, beyond comfused. You couldn't remember getting into bed or falling asleep. Still in a half asleep state, you tried to recall the events of the night until you remembered Carol. Had she carried you to bed? Had she left?

Your heart ached at the thought that your best friend wasn't there. Refusing to believe it, you wrapped your duvet tightly around you and trudged out of your room.

She was sleeping soundly on your couch with the blanket you had been curled up together under. You smiled at the sight of her looking so peaceful, taking a moment to consider yourself the luckiest person alive to have a friend as caring as Carol.

You came back to your sense when you realised how creepy it felt to be standing over your best friend and staring at her sleep, not to mention how freaked out she would be if she awoke to your duvet covered silhouette. But you didn't want to leave her side.

Carol stirred when she felt you kneeling on the couch. Countless nights of sleeping next to her had taught you she was a fairly light sleeper. You were thankful that she wasn't startled by you kneeling over her as you adjusted your blanket.

"Y/n?" She muttered as she rubbed her eyes to try to see you better.

"Go back to sleep." You murmmered back before laying down on her stomach and holding the duvet over you both.

You felt so at home in her arms. She didn't protest to you and instead wrapped her arms around your back and closed her eyes again with a content smile.

You rested your head in the crook of her neck and soon drifted back to sleep. Carol, on the other hand, struggled to sleep for a while. You had slept in the same bed before, countless times, but you had never been so close together when you did. It had never felt so intimate.

It was making the butterflies that had started arriving years ago whenever you were around dance around happily. As much as Carol tried to ignore them, her feelings for you only ever grew.

*

Over the next few days Carol visited you a lot. You had always been happy to spend time with your friend, but in those days you appreciated her company even more. In fact you were pretty sure you craved it.

She checked in on you often and stayed the night when you asked her to. You tried not to be too clingy with your friend, knowing she had a busy life and a lot of responsibilities to take care of and you didn't want to keep her away from her hero life.

It made the moments you could spend with her even better. You had always had that thought process with Carol, but it was enhanced since the night you slept ontop of her on the couch - something she never commented on.

You mainly spent your time together in your appartment, but on that day Carol had another idea.

"I promise it's safe." Carol grinned at you as you looked over your balcony for the umpteenth time in the last five minutes. You never really realised how high the sixth floor was until your friend was encouraging you to jump off your balcony with her.

"You need to get out of that appartment." Carol insisted.

"I could go on a walk to do that! You know...like a normal person." Carol laughed at your defiance to try what she had offered.

"Just five minutes, you'll love it." Carol said genuinely as she took ahold of your hand. You had never realised how her hands seemed to fit perfectly in your own before. You smiled at the sensation of a slight tingling in your hand upon contact with Carol's.

"Ease off." You giggled, shaking Carol's hand.

"I'm not doing anything." Carol protested earnestly, giving you a comfused look. You gulped and tried not to think about what the feeling was. "If you don't like it I'll bring you right back, you're safe with me - the Strongest Avenger." She said with a cocky grin, she had heard someone say it once and it went straight to her head. You rolled your eyes at her with a smile then paused, biting your lip as you considered the offer properly.

"Okay." You breathed out.

"Okay?" Carol asked with an excited grin.

"What the hell, sure!" You exclaimed. Carol chuckled and went to stand behind you. The material of her suit pressed against your bare arms and made you shiver slightly, you assumed from nerves. Carol had told you you didn't need to wear a jacket or coat, claiming her powers would keep you warm.

She wrapped her arms around your waist to hold you tightly against her and you gripped onto her forearms, not being able to stop yourself smiling.

"You ready?" Carol asked as the yellow swirls started to surround Carol and heat up your back and stomach. Blue and red glimmers occasionally appeared amongst the swirls and you tried not to get too distracted by the beauty of Carol's powers.

The next thing you knew your feet were slowly leaving the ground until the tips of your shoes were an inch away from the floor. You felt weightless and couldn't help but laugh a little at the absurdity that you were floating on thin air.

"Okay?" Carol checked.

"Okay." You confirmed.

As soon as the word left your mouth you felt like you were being catapulted through the air. Wind whipped your hair across your face and everything was a blur. All you could focus on was the whirling colours and Carol's strong grip on your waist.

You were going directly upwards for a few seconds until Carol eased you both forwards slightly, angled so you could finally take in your surroundings.

The speed at which you had been going to get so high in such a short amount of time was insane. It was impossible to know exactly how high up you were, all you knew was the faint clouds in the nighttime sky were closer to you than the ground. A lot closer.

The small gaps amongst the thin layers of clouds gave a glimpse at the stars that shimmered above you. The view below was just as breath-taking.

The city was lit up by the lights emitting from each building, each playing a part in the beautiful display. The lights shimmered and twinkled just as the stars did, the two very different worlds having the same beauty from such a height.

As Carol leveled herself out more you felt your legs drop infront of you and away from Carol. Your grip on the hero tightened in response to the new position.

"Do you trust me?" Carol asked carefully. You nodded, not knowing what your friend was planning but knowing you would go along with whatever she had planned.

One moment Carol had her reassuring grip on your waist, guiding you through the night air, and the next she was gone. You plummeted through the air in an instant, a silent scream escaping your throat. You squeezed your eyes shut tightly, not wanting to see the world spinning as you fell, but as soon as you were falling you were safe again.

You landed on Carol's back surprisingly lightly. You blinked a few times in shock, not understanding what had happened until you realised that Carol was flying horizontally and the position allowed you both to have a much better view and in a better position.

You sighed with a grin as stared down at the city in awe, your eyes occasionally flickering up to the dark sky. You rested your head in the crook of Carol's neck and wrapped your arms around her front, easing into her as easily as you had that night on the couch.

It was the happiest you had felt in such a long time. You felt safe with Carol, even from such a dangerous height and the whole event had you feeling more relaxed and content than you could ever remember.

A warmth spread over your body as the pair of you gently flew over the city. While you wanted to believe it was from Carol's powers, you knew deep down that that wasn't it. Because you had had that warmth for Carol on the coldest nights, you had had it when she was on the other side of the room, it had been there for as long as you could remember. And it was only getting stronger.

*

It didn't take anymore encouragement to get back into your usual way of life without any issues. Thanks to Carol there didn't seem to be much difference. The times that you would have been spending with Wanda you spent with Carol. She knew you were okay and that you didn't need her to mope around with you anymore - not that you had really ended up doing that together much. But you wanted her with you; she seemed to want to be with you too.

While you had slept in the same bed multiple times since you had on the couch, you never cuddled close to her like you did before. You knew that if you did that warmth would return. You knew, deep down, what it meant. However you had no idea if Carol's feelings for you were anything more than platonic, it was a line you weren't willing to cross, so you pushed those feelings to the side as much as you could.

Despite your efforts, those mornings you woke up next to your friend you found that you had your head resting on her shoulder or an arm hooked around her waist or one of your legs tangled with hers. She never seemed to mind, in fact one time you could have sworn you saw her eyes drop when you separated yourself from her. You told yourself you were just seeing things that weren't there.

So one night when Carol casually invited you to an Avenger's party you almost choked on your popcorn. You had always gotten along with the team - ever since the mix up on the mission that had led you to meet them and Carol. You had been to a fair few of those parties in the time you had been friends, but that party would be different.

Carol had assured you that no one else on the team knew exactly what had happened between you and Wanda. Your friend knew you didn't want people knowing and Wanda wasn't about to announce it, all the team knew was that you had broken up.

"You don't have to." Carol said quickly. "Wanda will be there." She informed in unimportant fact kind of way. "I just thought it would be nice for you to see everyone again. They miss you."

"They do?" Even thought you had known the Avengers for years, you still couldn't help but be a insecure before seeing them. You didn't have any powers or training. You always wondered what you could possibly bring to their table. Those worries were always put to rest once you were settled in, the smiles on their faces and laughter they emitted when you saw them was hard to fake. Besides, it wasn't like they had any reason to fake it.

You very quickly stopped being insecure when it came to Carol though. You had spent so much time together and knew each other so well that you never worried what she thought of you. She reminded you often of the traits she loved so much, it had been something you had started.

"I'd love to go." You smiled at Carol then went back to the screen. You never liked to make things awkward with exes. It wasn't like you and Wanda were going to become best buddies any time soon, but you were determined to be civil. You just hoped she would be too.

"Great." Carol concluded after studying you for a bit, wanting to be absolutely sure that it was what you wanted. "I'll pick you up at eight on Saturday."

"It's in two days?" You exclaimed, turning to Carol with a horrified expression.

"It is?" Carol confirmed in a not-too-sure tone, not understanding what the big deal was.

"Jeeze, Carol, give a girl a better warning next time." You huffed as you leant back against the couch. The blonde chucked next to you and muttered an apology.

Carol continued watching the film she had put on while you planned when and where you would get an outfit. You knew the dress code of those parties, that wouldn't be an issue, but part of you wanted to match with Carol.

"What are you going to wear?" You asked casually.

"Haven't decided yet."

Damn. You would just have to wing it.

*

Carol knocked on your door at exactly eight o'clock on the night of the party. You were startled at the sound of it at first, not expecting her to actually use the door for once.

You opened the door with a wide grin on your face but felt as though you had the breath knocked out of you when you saw your friend. She was wearing a tailored dark y/f/c suit with a neat white blouse. Her hair was slightly tossled and hung loose around her shoulders. It all went perfectly with her familiar warm smile. She looked beautiful.

Carol's outfit was strikingly similar to your own y/f/c dress that was a much lighter tone but the similarity was still there.

"H-hey." You stuttered as you continued to take in her outfit.

"Hey yourself." Carol grinned smugly, not oblivious to your stare.

"You look...really...amazing." You couldn't help but say. It was the truth.

"You look really amazing too." Carol said a lot more easily than you did. You giggled and stepped out of your appartment and locked it.

"Milady." Carol said in a terrible English accent as she offered her arm for you to hold.

"Milord." You went along and put your arm easily through hers before you started walking down the hallway, unable to contain your smile at the childish and loveable act.

*

When you arrived at the party you were bombarded with people wanting to talk to Carol. You had grown used to that, but it was still a downer when you wanted to stay by Carol, at least for a while.

Eventually, you were summoned away from your friend by the Avengers who were eager to catch up with you after so long.

"How've you been?" Nat asked with a welcoming hug as she outstretched her arms I'm an open hug.

"I've been pretty great." You replied honestly as you hugged her tightly. There was no one you were closer to than Carol, but Nat was someone you considered a friend without a doubt.

"What about you?" You asked genuinely as you pulled away.

"Same old." Nat smiled in her familiar way she saved for those she knew rather than the strangers in the room she had to play nice with.

You talked to Nat for a while as though nothing had changed. You hadn't seen Wanda and you had no idea where she was and no one mentioned her. You were thankful there wasn't any tension around the group. They all talked to you in the same way they always had with the exception of them asking about Carol more. You kept missing their knowing smiles hidden behind their drinks.

After a while you and Tony had your own convosation and it seemed as though being around the others was the only kind of self control he had when it came to refraining talking about relationships. As soon as you two were left alone he didn't hesitate to start saying what he had been thinking.

"Hey, don't get me wrong, you and Wanda seemed great, but I always thought it would be you and Carol who would end up together." Tony said as though he was voicing a passing thought.

"Me and Carol?" You tried to ask smoothly. Admittedly you had been thinking a lot about what it would be like to date Carol. You couldn't seem to stop your mind wandering at night to imagining scenarios with her in which you were dating. It always made you smile so your cheeks hurt until you reminded yourself it wasn't real. Carol would never see you that way, would she?

"Well I didn't see it until Nat pointed it out. Then we actually all kind of assumed you were dating before you and Wanda became a thing." Tony continued in his casual manner before taking another sip of his drink.

"Really?" You looked over at Nat who was talking to Carol. Nat seemed as though she was trying to convince Carol to do something because the blonde had the conflicked look upon her face that always appeared when she had been thinking long and hard about something.

"You certainly acted like it." Tony snickered as he followed your line of sight. As if on cue, Carol and Nat glanced your way and a heat began to grow along your neck at the feeling of embarrassment at being caught staring.

Nat had a small smirk playing along her lips while Carol mirrored your expression guiltily.

You missed Tony and Nat exchanging knowing smiles. You missed the way Carol's cheeks became tinted pink too.

"Excuse me." Tony said as he put a hand gently below your shoulder before walking off in the direction Nat had also departed too.

You smiled at Carol and wandered towards her place on the balcony, glad that she turned around entirely to face you. Unfortunately the blush on her cheeks had faded by the time you would have been close enough to spot it.

"Enjoying the party?" Carol asked as you stepped out onto the balcony and leant against the railing.

"I am." You said certainly. The blonde turned to copy your position so you could both gaze out at the buildings below you. The view you had gotten with Carol was undefeated, but the Avengers tower provided something special too.

"I told you they missed you." Carol grinned as she nudged your side with her elbow.

"Yeah." You blushed and peered down at the railing.

"I don't know about you but my shoes are killing me and I think I've talked to enough of these guests to bore me to death twice over." Carol sighed with a childish smile. You grinned back and nodded.

"You want to stay at mine tonight?" You asked hopefully.

"I'd love to." Carol's smile grew as you held her arm out for you to link your arm through again.

"Milady." The hero said with the same terrible English accent.

"Milord." You mocked as you put your arm through hers easily.

Maybe Tony was onto something.

*

That night when Carol took the same place she always did in her home that was as much hers as it was yours, you couldn't focus on the movie playing on the screen. You couldn't focus on anything except the blonde beside you.

You had your head resting on her shoulder and everytime you moved to get your drink and turned back to her your eyes instantly strayed to her lips, images of kissing her filling your head.

You remembered the night she moped with you after your breakup and how she had been the best friend you could ask for. Except you didn't want Carol to be just your friend. You wanted her to be more.

Your mind had been racing since since party, considering what Tony had said to you and how true it was. You and Carol really had always acted like a couple. You had never thought anything of it, even when Carol did it considerably less when you were dating someone.

Because you had been in more than just one relationship in the time you been friends with Carol. None of them ever felt right. You always thought there was something missing. Something that the next person would fix. No one ever could though. Because what you had been looking had been right infront of you the whole time.

All those feelings that had come bubbling to the surface the couple of weeks prior, they had been there all along. Christ, you were such an idiot.

"Carol..." You whispered, more afraid of what you were about to say than anything before. You wanted to back out. You didn't want to mess up what you had with Carol, but you had never been so sure of something than you were for your feelings for Carol in your entire life.

"Yeah?" She said softly.

"I think..." You held your breath and you could have sworn Carol did too. "I think I'm inlove with you." The blonde froze for a solid minute. Neither of you spoke. Tears threatened to come to the surface as you realized what you had done.

Eventually, Carol put her bowl of popcorn down and slowly turned towards you. You didn't dare meet her eye, instead playing with the edge of the blanket over you both and hoping it would trigger a sink hole beneath you.

"You do?" She whispered. You nodded and bit your lip in an attempt to hold back your tears. Carol lifted your chin gradually so you were looking at her. She had an unreadable expression.

"I love you too." You half laughed half sighed in relief as a smile spread across your face and the tears finally sprung free.

"Yeah?" You choked out. Carol instantly cupped your face and wiped your tears off of your cheeks as she smiled back at you.

"Yeah!" She giggled. "I've wanted to say that for so long." She admitted in a rush.

"Why didn't you? It could have saved us so much time!" You exclaimed and gently punched her arm.

"I was scared, even with Nat trying to convince me to say something." Carol explained, it was her turn to look away in embarrassment but you quickly pulled her back the way she did.

"That's really sweet, I'm here now." You assured genuinely.

Carol smiled back at you as her eyes glanced down at you lips. You grinned at the obviousness of what she was thinking and bravely closed the gap between you. After that prompt Carol eagerly met you half way and smiled into your long overdue kiss. Her lips were so so soft and moved against like a perfected dance. When you pulled away for air you rested your forehead against hers and breathed heavily with a heart filled smile.

"We have to do that more often." Carol said as her hands landed on your waist.

"We absolutely do." You agreed before pulling her into another kiss, engraving the memory of that night into your mind forever.

[dragon-kazansky]

Made with love | Helmut Zemo

Chef Zemo AU! 👨‍🍳

Gender neutral reader!

Collage by @realremyd

[Next chapter]

Part 1

You had always wanted to travel through Europe. You wanted to see those streets at least once in your life. Meet the people, attention the languages, taste the food, and maybe even do a little shopping in certain cities.

Your friend, Wanda Maximoff, came from a rather unknown country called Sokovia. When you had told her about your trip, she had brought it up. She hadn't been back home since she left, but she remembered it well. She suggested some places to go if you ever stopped by. You made a mental note to drop by her home country for her sake.

Sokovia was a declining country. It had its fair share of issues and problems, but it was still out there waiting to be discovered. The least you could do was visit on your travels.

You had passed through Spain and France, spent a few extra days in Gemany, stopping by the Netherlands to see Amsterdam. You have lost count of the photos you had taken in Austria, and it was as your stay in Poland was coming to an end when you remembered about Sokovia. The other countries you had planned to pass through would have to wait. You spent your last night Poland planning the flyover to Sokovia, luckily finding a flight that will take you to the capital.

In your pocket you kept the list of places Wanda and suggested, her hoping most of them were still there. You would of course take pictures for her.

The plane landed and you exited the airport. You wanted to see the city. A cab station near by grabbed your attention, so you hurried over. You asked the driver of the nearest cab to drop you off in the city centre. He did.

Looking around Novi Grad, you were taken in. The city was old. People were going about their business, but some even turned to smile at you as you walked along. You took in the area, admiring the buildings and the people. You were impressed and in awe with the city.

You keep an eye out for somewhere to stay, checking Wanda's list as you go incase you spot one of the places on it.

You're not sure how long you have been strolling the streets when something catches your eye. It's not a very big building, but it stands out. A restaurant. A Spanish restaurant. You smile. Spain was one of your first stops when you got to Europe, the food was one of your favourite parts.

You realise just how hungry you are. You hadn't eaten anything since before your flight. The door is open and it looks like a good place to stop.

You look up at the sign as you get closer to it. Gold letters on a purple background. There was something elegant about it.

Escorpión Morado

You look at your list quickly. It's on there. Purple Scorpion. Wanda knew about this place. You put away the list, grab your camera, and stand far enough away to get a shot of the exterior. You smile at the outcome.

Outside there were a few tables. Four, to be exact. They had a nice view of the courtyard just in front of the restaurant. The entrance was two narrow double doors, opened wide to let air into the shop, and allowing easy access for the customers to come and go. The shop being on the corner of the street allowed a view on either side theiugh the large windows. On each window was the name of the restaurant in faint lettering. You could see inside, but decided you could admire it better by going in.

Entering the restaurant, you were welcomed with a certain warmth. It wasn't too busy, but there was still several people here, enjoying themselves. You took a picture of the inside.

The inside was nice and open, plenty of room to move around. A bar was situated at the far end, a couple of people sitting at it. You walked over the polished floor and made your way to the back. You pick a stool and sit down, looking up at the menu. There were plenty of options.

"What can I get for you?" A voice asks, coming over to you. You turn your head to see who was speaking, your voice suddenly doesn't want to work.

The man comes to stop in front of you. Brown hair swept to the side, dark brown eyes, sparkling with amusement, a smile tugging at his lips. His shirt sleeves were pushed back up to his elbows, and apron was around his waist. He had very clearly just been in the kitchen.

He tilts his head to the side slightly. You had yet to answer him.

"Are you alright?" He asks. "English?"

Oh, he thought you didn't understand.

"Um, yes. I speak English. I'm sorry, I'm fine," you feel embarrassed, shuffling on the stool slightly.

"That's alright. What can I get for you?" He asks, offering a friendly smile.

You glance up at the menu again. "What do you reccomend?"

As you glance back, you see his smile widen. You had eaten tapas while you were in Spain, but you found yourself wanting to hear him speak again. There was something about his accent that was satisfying.

"Since I haven't see you around here before, I'll make a special for you. How does that sound?"

"That sounds lovely, thank you."

He smiles and leaves you to go and make it himself. You look around the restaurant again while you wait.

On the wall just off to the side, there was a plaque. You get up and walk over to it, wanting to read what was on it. There was a photo above the plaque that caught your attention first. An older gentleman, dressed smartly and looking proud. You read the plaque to find out who he is.

Or was.

Heinrich Zemo

Founder of Escorpión Morado.

He died a few years ago, leaving the restaurant to his son, Helmut Zemo. There was no photo of his son, but you assumed he was here somewhere.

Actually, looking at the photo, you could awe some semblance with the man who had served you. Was he the owner?

You look at the plaque once more before going back sit down. The atmosphere in here was nice. You could see yourself coming here every day just to pass time. It certainly seemed like a favourite spot for these people.

You smiled as you glanced over the few people gathered here. A couple by the window, just looking out at people passing by. A man sitting at the bar talking to one of the staff members, they seemed to be enjoying themselves. There were a couple of families taking up tables here and there.

It was very relaxing here.

You turn back around when the man returns, he puts the dish down in front of you and smiles. It looks delicious, just like the one you had back in Spain.

He stands there as you take your first bite.

You stop and look at him as soon as the food touches your tongue. It's amazing. You smile as you eat it, nodding at him, impressed.

"This is the best tapas I've ever eaten."

He looks really pleased with himself.

"Is that so?"

"Yeah, especially since I was Spain not that long ago." You go for another bite.

"A traveller?"

"Yeah. I always wanted to see Europe, so I've been saving like crazy and here I am."

He leans against the counter, seemingly interested in this information. You're not complaining, he is definitely attractive company.

"And you found yourself here of all places."

"I have a friend who comes from Sokovia. She had mentioned it to me before I left for my trip, the least I could do was come and see," you told him, still enjoying your meal.

"Sokovia isn't exactly a popular destination, but I welcome you all the same. I also welcome you to my restaurant."

"Ah, so you are Helmut Zemo? I was reading the plaque over there," you said, nodding over at the wall.

"The one and only. Do I get the honour of your name?"

"So you ask all your customers for their names?" You ask, smiling at him.

"Only the really interesting ones."

"Interesting? I've been here all of five minutes. What makes you think I'm interesting?"

"When you work in a business like this, you get to know who is interesting or not. It comes with the territory. Also, moat of my customers are locals, so anyone from outside the country has to be interesting in some way," he crosses his arms and looks at you smugly.

"I see," you chuckle.

"Is that a no, then?"

"Y/N. My name is Y/N," you reply rather bashful.

"Y/N, lovely."

The way he says it with his accent makes a shiver run down your spine. You had a sudden need for him to say it again, but you also had to remember to be a normal human being who isn't going to freak out the lovely man they just met.

"Your meal is on the house."

You look up at him sharply.

"Oh no, please let me pay," you say urgently.

He shakes his head.

"No, this one is free. Only this one."

"You say that as if you know I'm going to come back," you look at him with a narrowed gaze.

"I trust that you will," he smirks.

"Why?"

"Well, you ate everything, complimented both my food and establishment, and I'm far too interesting, myself, for you only to come by once."

You laugh softly, shaking your head at him. His eyes lit up at the sound.

"Insufferable," you say, sliding off the stool.

"I'm aware, you get used to it."

You smile as you make sure you don't leave any of your belongings behind and thank him for the delicious food.

"Come again," he says.

"I'll think about it."

You leave, knowing he was smiling as you left the building. You make your way across the square, resisting looking back through the window to see if he was still there.

You pull out your phone and bring up a map. You needed to find somewhere to stay for a few nights. You didn't have to look far. There was a small hotel up ahead and around the corner. You decided to try there.

Finding it wasn't too hard. You only had to go down a small backstreet. It was out of the way and hidden, a nice peaceful place to stay for a while.

You enter. The lobby wasn't too big and it was nice and quiet. The building was old, but the inside seemed well looked after.

You walk over to the desk and smile at the man sitting there.

"Hello."

He smiles, "hello."

He spoke English too. That was good. Your Sokovian was... nonexistent.

"I would like a room for a few nights."

He nods and opens a big book information front of him. He grabs a pen and flicks through room numbers.

"How long are you staying?"

"Three nights? Yeah, three should do." You still had countries to check off your list.

He nods and asks you to sign the book. While you do so he grabs a key from the wall behind him. You pass him the book back and take the key.

"Enjoy your stay."

You nod and take the stairs up. Your room was nice. Big enough for one person and on the main street side, where you came up to get here. You could just about see the square from the window.

You sat on the bed. Perfect. There was a TV, but something told you it would be Sokovian television. Maybe you could watch it just for the sake of it.

You lay back on the bed and took our your phone, calling Wanda.

She picked up almost immediately.

"Y/N, where are you?"

You smile, "Sokovia. You were right, Wanda, it's very pretty here."

You hear her little gasp down the phone.

"You're actually there? You're making me homesick now."

You chuckle softly.

"I'm sorry, Wanda. It's a beautiful city though. I even stopped off at one of the restaurants you listed."

"You did? Which one?"

"Escorpión Morado."

"Escorpión Morado? Oh my gosh! It's still there? Did you meet Heinrich? I remember him being so wonderful to his customers."

"Actually, Wanda, Heinrich passed away a few years ago. His son runs it now, but I guess you could say I did technically meet the owner."

"My heart is saddened to hear of his loss. I do vaguely remember his son. Though back then he worked in the kitchen and very rarely came out."

"Helmut is rather lovely. He stayed and talked to me while I ate."

"Is he cute?"

You roll your eyes at her question.

"He might be," you chuckle.

"Perhaps a romance will spark and you'll be left heartbroken because you'll have to come back here and maybe never see him again. I'll be here watching you drink wine straight from the bottle and gobble down ice cream because you're utterly in love with this man you met once while travelling."

"Wanda, I need you to stop watching those chick flick movies and come back to the real world. I'm not going to fall in love with him. His food, however, is to die for."

"Oh, you're in love with the food. Spain exists, you know."

"I know, I was there, remember? Kind of missing the sun, if I'm being honest, but my God Wanda, this man can cook."

"Marry that man, Y/N. He can cook."

"Wanda, shut up," you laugh with her down the phone.

"Never. Enjoy your time in my home country, Y/N. It honestly means the world to me that you're there."

"In taking photos, don't worry! I'll be home soon, Wanda. See you."

You end the call.

You drop your phone on the bed beside you and stare up at the ceiling. So far you really liked Sokovia, very different from places you had been to so far.

You smile as you think about Helmut. He was certainly the most memorable part of your stay here so far.

Maybe you would visit him again tomorrow.

For the food, obviously.

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