#every single person in the world seems fo be SO far up her ass and its literally seeping into god damn everything and poisoning it ALL

[stevethehairington]

i am SOOOOOO sick of seeing stuff about god damn ****** ***** EVERY FUCKING WHERE!!!!! i have literally every single iteration of her stupid name blocked on every social media and news platform i am on and YET!!!! stuff about her STILL permeates!!!! ii literlaly will get notifications of posts/articles about her and it's like HELLO!!!! i have that shit blocked!!!! i dont want it!!!! ican't fucking escape it!!!! i don't care i don't CARE!!!!!

[debbiechanclub]

Know You Better Now (*new* BTOOT sequel), Part 1

The title is the same, but I assure you the content is all shiny and new! The revamped BTOOT sequel is here!

Thank you to everyone for your patience on this. I just lost interest/direction for the original sequel after Ethan all but disappeared off Dynamite, but I'm honestly kind of glad I did because I like this new version so. Much. More. And we have Kenny's facial hair to thank for it.

So enough talking - enjoy! And please let me know what you think!

Know You Better Now

Synopsis: Nearly nine months have passed since Alex's freak shoulder injury, and she's still not cleared for action. But while Kenny has been a source of strength for her throughout her recovery, all her other relationships are in shambles - and she's finding it harder and harder to reconcile the Kenny she knows behind closed doors with his persona as the "Belt Collector."

Part: 1/?

Pairing: Kenny Omega x OFC x TBD 👀

Word count: 4.6k

Warnings: Language, ANGST

Find more of my fics here.

Tag squad: @galacticstat @hotyeehawman @hdbngsprnva @heelchampbucks @kingswitchblade @bec0m @betsy-bradock @linziland13 @librathepheonix13 @gabbynorth98 @exe-babymox-exe @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @brokenglassslippers @rocca09 @meteora-fc @kawaiikels @adriii-omega @thatgirlforever5 @sugar-melts-mo-fo

May 30, 2021 AEW Double or Nothing

Surgery with six to twelve months’ recovery time. That was the prognosis Alex had received when she’d dislocated her shoulder in September. Now, nearly nine months later, everything had changed.

“Well, there’s good news and there’s not-as-good news,” Doc Sampson started. He’d just completed yet another check-up exam on her shoulder, and Alex could tell he was trying to keep up morale. But she already knew what he was going say. “The good news is you’ve gotten the full range of mobility back. The bad news is the strength isn’t quite there yet.”

She scoffed lightly to herself. It was exactly as she suspected. “So it’s no news, in other words,” she quipped.

“At least it’s not bad news?” Kenny hopefully offered.

Doc smiled sympathetically. “Just keep at it. Resistance bands, weights; you know the drill.”

Alex’s eyebrows arched. “Yeah, I do,” she returned. It seemed like weight training and physical therapy was all she did anymore.

“Just a few more weeks,” Doc said; but in medical-speak, time was relative. Alex knew all too well that weeks could easily mean months. “Good luck tonight, Kenny,” he added, and he went out the door.

Alex’s head fell back and she groaned in frustration. Kenny wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into him. “It won’t be much longer,” he assured with a kiss on the side of her head.

“It’s been almost nine months,” she muttered.

“I know. But you don’t want to rush your recovery, especially for something like a shoulder injury.”

She frowned. “At this rate Anna will be back from her shoulder injury before I am.”

“What?” Kenny laughed and hugged her tighter. “No, she won’t. I give it maybe another month and you’ll be back better than you were before. Which reminds me, you should probably have some new gear made. I bet your old stuff is too big on you now.”

The sound of her laugh was muffled by his shoulder. “Because you’ve been kicking my ass every week for the last six months,” she said. If there was a silver lining to her injury, it was that she’d gotten into the best shape of her life what with all the training she’d been doing—and it was all thanks to Kenny. Truth be told, Alex didn’t know what she would have done without him over the last nine months. He’d moved her into his house so she wouldn’t have to struggle through the weeks after surgery alone; he’d set her up with his doctors; he’d driven her to physical therapy appointments and trained with her every single week. He’d been there for her in ways she couldn’t even express, and she’d fallen even more in love with him for it.

It made it that much more difficult for her to admit that the Kenny she knew in private was a far cry from the one who called himself the “Belt Collector.”

“I wouldn’t push you if I didn’t think you could handle it,” he returned with a peck on her lips. “I don’t think anyone’s gonna recognize you out there tonight.”

Alex momentarily tensed in his arms, but she didn’t relax quick enough. Kenny felt it—and he knew exactly what it was about.

“You’re not having second thoughts about it, are you?”

She looked up at him. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t,” she admitted.

Kenny’s face fell. “Alex… we’ve talked about this.”

“I know,” she breathed. She stepped back from him, suddenly anxious. They had talked about it, at length. It was a big statement for her to accompany him for his match tonight, because she hadn’t been seen since her injury. In fact, she’d all but gone off-grid. She hadn’t been on television; she’d barely posted on social media; she hadn’t responded to any questions for comment about her recovery or her thoughts on Kenny’s pursuits. She’d just wanted to fly under the radar until she was back in that ring for good.

But then, two-and-a-half weeks ago, the match between PAC and Orange Cassidy for a shot at Kenny’s AEW World Championship had gone to a no contest. As a result, it was decided that Kenny would defend the title in a triple threat match against them both at Double or Nothing—tonight. And as soon as the match was booked, Alex knew—she knew—that Kenny would find a way to pull her into it.

But she didn’t know if she could—or should—go out there with him. Not with the way things currently were between her and the people she’d thought were her best friends.

Kenny reached out and took her hands in his, and she looked back up at him from the floor. His blue eyes were concerned. But she could tell he was frustrated.

“I want you out there with me, baby. And yeah… I’d be lying if I said Orange wasn’t part of the reason why.”

She frowned. “Kenny—”

“Just hear me out,” he gently cut her off, and she pursed her lips. But she let him continue. “Best Friends are actually supposed to be your best friends, right? But when was the last time any of them checked in on you? I know Chuck did for a while, but Trent? He’s been a complete asshole to you.”

Alex fidgeted, her chest tightening. His words were like salt in a wound—but he wasn’t wrong. At first, Chuck had checked in on her fairly regularly… but his texts and FaceTime calls had tapered off after the first couple months. At the time, she’d just chalked it up to circumstance. She was out of sight and out of mind, and he and Orange had been put through more than their fair share of bullshit by Miro, Kip, and Penelope after Trent had torn his pec muscle in December. She couldn’t really blame him for going quiet.

But then, two months ago, Trent had returned with Kris in tow—and Alex hadn’t been able to chalk it up to circumstance any longer. And when Kris seemingly became an official member of Best Friends, she couldn’t ignore the twinge of jealousy in her gut, either. She felt forgotten. Replaced in person just as much as she had been on the Best Friends t-shirt. And the thing of it was, none of them seemed to even miss her.

Least of all Trent.

Kenny squeezed her hands, redrawing her attention. “Look… I’m not trying to turn you against them. But I can see how hurt you are by how they’ve acted over the last couple months, and it kills me. And yeah, it pisses me off, too. So… why not come out there with me tonight, looking absolutely fucking fantastic, and show Best Friends just how good you’re doing without them?”

Alex’s brow furrowed. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, there was a petty part of her that wanted to do exactly that. But the softer side of her just wanted her friends back.

“I get what you’re saying, I just... I feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place.”

“I know you do,” he sympathetically returned. “But I’m not asking you to go out there and try to keep Orange from winning. I just want you in my corner. And maybe I want to show you off a little bit, too.”

He grinned and pulled her closer, and Alex couldn’t help the coy smile that pulled at her lips. Through all their ups and downs, Kenny had never failed to make her feel special; wanted. She didn’t take that for granted—especially not now.

“I did bring a really cute outfit to wear,” she said, sliding her hands up his arms. “It would be a shame if it went to waste.”

His smile widened. “Well then you gotta wear it.”

Alex bit her lip in thought. But she didn’t think for long. She put her hands on either side of his face and gave him a tender kiss. “You know I love you, right?”

Kenny gripped her waist. “Of course, I do. I love you, too,” he returned, and he kissed her again. “Come on, you should go get ready,” he said with a pat on her backside. And as they left the exam room, Alex knew that accompanying Kenny for his match was the right decision.

It was the potential consequences that worried her.

* * * * * * * * * *

“Holy shit, I almost didn’t recognize you!”

That was what Stella had proclaimed when Alex walked into hair and makeup. It was followed by a chorus of more of the same, a parade of hugs from everyone in the room—and dozens of questions.

“How are you? You look incredible!”

“Is your shoulder cleared?”

“So, are you officially living with Kenny now?”

“I’ve been dying to know how you feel about everything going on with him.”

And Alex had done her best to field each one of them.

“I’m doing pretty well, and thanks. It seems like I’ve been filling all my free time with working out.”

“No… not yet. But hopefully in the next few weeks.”

“I mean, not officially. I still have my house in Virginia—my cousin’s been renting it out. But I don’t know. It feels like I’ve officially moved in.”

“It is what it is. He’s just being Kenny Omega.”

Thankfully, no one pressed her on that last one.

Instead, Stella was all too happy to dish on all the latest and juiciest backstage news and gossip. Anna Jay and Jungle Boy were an item. Cody had estranged himself from nearly everyone. Callie had left AEW and pro wrestling altogether—and moved in with Cash. Alex had already known about that one, but it was still strange to hear. Looking back, it was hard to believe her friendship with Callie and relationship with Cash had ever even happened at all. It felt like another life; another time.

“You’re all done, my dear,” Stella said. She handed her a mirror—and Alex was taken aback by her own reflection. Long, sleek dark brown hair; glowing fair skin; pouty nude lips; a sexy reverse cat eye that made her hazel eyes pop. She sat up a little straighter. For perhaps the first time in months, she felt herself again.

She thanked Stella and hopped out of the chair, a pep in her step as she went out the door—

“Alex?!”

She halted in her tracks. Even though she hadn’t heard it in forever, she’d recognize that voice anywhere—Kris. She held her breath and turned around; but relaxed in relief. It was just her and Orange. At least she wouldn’t have to face them all at once.

“Holy shit!” She hurried over and wrapped her in a tight hug before she could even blink. Alex was stiff and awkward as she returned it. She hadn’t expected that reaction.

“Why didn’t you tell us you’d be here tonight?” Kris asked as she stepped back from her. Alex hesitated to answer.

“Um, I thought about it. But given why I’m here…”

She trailed off and looked awkwardly at Jim. He shrugged. “It’s business,” he returned. “So I guess this means you’ll be in Kenny’s corner tonight?”

Alex crossed an arm over herself and nervously fidgeted with the skin on her elbow. She nodded. Jim’s expression remained as indecipherable as ever.

“And you look hot as fuck,” Kris perceptively interjected. “Seriously, I think I might be questioning my sexuality.”

Alex breathed a laugh—

“You should come say hi to Chuck and Trent! Trent’s gonna shit himself.”

Just like that, her smile vanished. Her lips parted in silent question, uncertain if Kris was being serious. But she looked too genuinely excited not to be.

“I… I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Alex said. “I mean, considering the last time I talked to Trent…”

She trailed off and looked down at her shoes. There had been things said by both her and Trent in the heat of the moment that had made an already uncomfortable situation worse. They hadn’t spoken in more than five months, since right before he’d gotten injured. She didn’t think now was the time to start.

“Trent has his head up his ass,” Jim said, and Alex flicked her eyes back up at him, surprised. “You know how he is with this stuff. You’ll probably have to be the bigger person.”

Alex sighed. He was probably right. But again—tonight wasn’t the night. “Now’s just not the time,” she remorsefully returned. “But I’ll see you out there. Good luck—really.”

And before either of them could say anything else, she turned and continued down the hall, digging her nails into the palms of her hands.

* * * * * * * * * *

“Maybe you shouldn’t come out there… you’re gonna distract me walking around like this.”

Alex looked at Kenny through the mirror as he sidled up behind her. He reached up and brushed her hair back from her neck, and she tilted her head so he could press his lips against her skin.

“It's too late,” she returned. “I’ve already gone through all the trouble of getting ready.”

Kenny hummed. “Well, I can take it all off for you, if you want.”

He nipped her neck, and she smirked and squirmed. Her mood had completely turned around from earlier in the night; it was amazing what a little hair and makeup and the right outfit could do. The white bustier-style crop top she wore wasn’t her usual style, but it showed off the hard work she’d put in at the gym—and it didn’t hurt that it made her boobs look amazing. And even though she’d made the outfit more “her” with a pair of distressed boyfriend jeans and her white low-top Chucks, Kenny was right—they probably wouldn’t recognize her out there.

But truth be told, she’d never felt more confident.

“You can later,” she smirked, and she felt a low growl rumble in his bare chest.

“Get a room!”

Alex rolled her eyes. Matt’s voice was an unwelcome interruption from across the locker room. She’d almost forgotten that he and Nick were there.

Kenny shot a glare over his shoulder. “Why are you looking?”

Matt opened his mouth, but two quick knocks on the door cut him off before he could make a smart-ass retort, and then Don Callis walked in.

“We’re up, Ken.”

Kenny smirked at Alex. “Let’s go give the people what they really want.”

He picked up his AEW World Championship, and she helped him secure it around his waist, followed by the Impact World Championship, which he strapped across his chest. Then, he picked up the AAA Mega Championship and old TNA World Heavyweight Championship and held them in each of his hands. And Alex had to admit—it was an impressive sight, Kenny draped in championship gold. She’d be lying if she said it didn’t turn her on.

“How do I look?” he asked her.

She bit her lip. “Good. Really good.”

He grinned, cocky.

They started for the door; but before Alex could follow Don and Kenny out, Matt stopped her. “Alex.” He pushed himself up from his chair and cast Nick a glance. He stood too. She rolled her eyes. They weren’t subtle at all.

Matt gave her a discerning look. “You are one-hundred percent in Kenny’s corner… right?”

Her brow lowered dangerously. Was he really questioning her loyalty now? “Are you serious?”

He shrugged a shoulder. “Well… I know Orange is one of your best friends—”

“Or he was,” Nick interjected.

“—and I just want to make sure that there aren’t any conflicts of interest.”

He smirked, obnoxiously smacking his gum between his teeth. Alex bit down on her jaw. She’d thought that maybe—maybe—Callie’s departure and her relationship with Kenny would have led her and Matt to at least be friendly with each other. But she’d thought wrong.

She gave him a tight smile. “Don’t worry your pretty little head, Matt. The only conflict going on here is the one between what you think that outfit looks like and what it actually looks like.”

He abruptly stopped chewing his gum. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

But Alex was already out the door. She caught up with Kenny and fell in step beside him. “Forget something?” he asked.

She shook her head. “No. Just got held up.”

They arrived at Gorilla, and Don went on and on talking Kenny up, boosting his confidence, assuring that neither Orange nor PAC stood a chance; but Alex tuned him out, nervously looking around. Waiting. And then she saw them: Orange, Chuck, Kris, and Trent.

Her heart jumped into her throat when her eyes met Chuck’s. He flashed her a smile; but it wasn’t as wide or as bright as she was used to.

“Hey. It’s good to see you,” he said, and he gave her arm a squeeze as he passed. She said nothing in response—just a tight grin of acknowledgement. Entirely impersonal compared to how they used to greet each other.

It’s the circumstances, she tried to tell herself.

Orange and Kris greeted her in much the same way, with awkward half-smiles as they walked by; Kris seemed apologetic, for some reason. And then, Trent reached her. His expression was cold, his eyes hard, and then he muttered underneath his breath, just loud enough for her to hear, “Thanks for telling us you’d be here.”

He kept walking, not waiting for her to even process what he’d said, and Alex’s heart sunk petrified into the pit of her stomach.

This was how things were now. She felt stupid for hoping for different.

* * * * * * * * * *

Alex had known it would be difficult to be ringside for this match. But, sixteen minutes into it, she hadn’t realized it would be this difficult.

PAC laid on his back, staring up at the lights courtesy of a bridging deadlift suplex into a pin attempt from Kenny. So, with him taken care of for the moment, Kenny turned his attention to Orange. He pulled his right kneepad down, and Alex had to stop herself from watching through her fingers as he kneed Orange hard in the face, once, and then again. She could feel the eyes of the fans at ringside watching her with keen interest, trying to gauge her reactions. They’d been shocked to see her come out with Kenny, and now her presence provided them with an extra layer of entertainment. At least Chuck, Trent, and Kris weren’t at ringside, too; they’d walked Orange out and promptly disappeared backstage. Alex didn’t know what she would have done if they’d stayed.

Kenny backed toward the ropes, aiming to deliver a third and final V-Trigger. But before he could, Orange held up his hands as if to tell him “stop.” And then he plunged them into his pant pockets and fell facedown onto the mat.

Kenny laughed, but he couldn’t care less. He walked over and started to pick Orange up; but then a revived PAC grabbed him and hit him with a hard forearm. They traded blows and kicks in the middle of the ring until Orange suddenly intervened and hit Kenny with a Michinoku Driver. However, Kenny rolled away and PAC hit Orange with a brainbuster. He covered him, but Orange thankfully kicked out at two.

Alex put her hand on Kenny’s shoulder as he laid underneath the ropes, halfway out of the ring. “Are you alright?”

But he didn’t answer her question. Instead, he said, “Go get one of my belts.”

She looked back at him in confusion. “What?”

“Go get one of my belts in case.”

Alex blinked and shook her head. She could not believe what he was asking her to do. “What? No, Kenny, I’m not doing that. You don’t need—”

But he rolled away, back underneath the ropes into the ring. PAC and Orange were in a precarious position on the top turnbuckle closest to them. It looked like PAC was trying to execute a superplex—but Kenny jumped up and shoved PAC off-balance, causing Orange to tumble from his grip and bounce off the ring apron to the floor. Alex started to check on him—but then she remembered she wasn’t out there for him and stopped short. She ran her hands over her hair, helpless. Inwardly hoping that he was alright.

Meanwhile, PAC had reversed Kenny’s attempt at a One-Winged Angel from the top turnbuckle and sent him sailing across the ring via a sunset flip powerbomb. They stood atop the opposite turnbuckle now, and Alex’s eyes widened in horror when PAC delivered an avalanche Falcon Arrow. But then, Orange suddenly scrambled back into the ring, tossed PAC out, and hooked Kenny’s leg. Every single person packed into Daily’s Place jumped from their seats as Bryce Remsburg slid to the mat and started to count. Kenny barely kicked out before three. Alex leaned her elbows on the ring apron, her head in her hands. That had been way too close.

All around her the fans started chanting, “That was three!” booming in her ears, and she bit down on her jaw. Kenny rolled out of the ring and stumbled over to her. For some reason, she already knew what for.

“Alex, go get one of my belts,” he said again. It was an order, not a question. But she stood her ground.

“No! I’m not helping you win like that!”

He let out a frustrated huff. “Baby, now’s not the time to argue about this. Just go get—”

She cut him off with a gasp as PAC came flying over the top rope headed straight for them. Kenny shoved her out of the way at the last second, taking all the impact himself and getting knocked to the floor. PAC, meanwhile, sprung back up and to the top turnbuckle. He slowly stood—and when Alex saw him jump into the air and perform the Black Arrow, she knew she had just seconds to act. She jumped over Kenny and rounded the turnbuckle as PAC hooked Orange’s leg. And just before Bryce could count three, she grabbed Orange’s boot and put it on the bottom rope.

Bryce stopped the count and pointed at Orange’s foot, none the wiser to what had happened. The fans, on the other hand, showered Alex with thunderous boos. Realizing what she’d done, PAC turned and shot her a glower that seemed almost inhuman. But she just pursed her lips and raised her chin in defiance.

Kenny pulled himself up by the ropes and ducked back into the ring, grinning like the cat that caught the canary, and the match went on, back and forth between him and PAC—until Orange scored another near-fall after he hit Kenny with a frantic Beach Break. PAC then tried for a Liger Bomb on Orange, but he fought out of it and landed a hard Orange Punch across his jaw, dropping him to the mat. Then he gave one to Kenny, and the crowd came unglued.

Orange fed off their energy, pumping himself up as PAC staggered to his feet. He hit another Orange Punch and went for the pin. Time seemed to stop as Alex watched, her heart in her throat and her hands on her head. She didn’t want Kenny to lose at all, let alone like this. But just as Bryce started the count, Don appeared out of nowhere and pulled him from the ring by his ankles.

Alex stood frozen to her spot as Bryce and Don yelled at each other, and she fully expected the former to expel the latter from ringside—but he didn’t. He simply got back in the ring, and the match continued. Don walked toward Alex, straightening his suit jacket. “Good work putting Orange’s foot on the ropes,” he said to her.

She didn’t say anything in return. She didn’t want a compliment from the likes of him.

Back in the ring, Kenny had been knocked to the floor once again—and PAC had the Brutalizer locked on Orange. When Kenny finally made it back through the ropes, he kicked PAC in the face once, twice. But he didn’t let go of his hold on Orange. So instead, Kenny made the desperate decision to hit Bryce with a hard double axe handle to the back.

The crowd booed, and Alex hid her face in her hands. “Come on, Ken…” she breathed. Not like this.

Meanwhile, Don took the initiative to do what Kenny had been asking Alex to do all along. He grabbed the Impact Championship from the timekeeper’s area and tossed it to Kenny in the ring. Kenny caught it, and then he turned and clocked PAC over the head. He dropped like dead weight to the mat, and Kenny tossed the belt aside, the fans still booing all the while.

But apparently, one belt wasn’t enough.

Don tossed in the Triple A Mega Championship next, and as PAC staggered to his feet, Kenny hit him again. Then he threw in the TNA World Heavyweight Championship. Alex had to bite her lip to keep from shouting at Kenny to stop. She looked away just before he hit PAC a third time.

Finally, Don handed Kenny the AEW World Championship. He took it and held it high above his head, gloating, reveling in the crowd’s hatred. Somehow, PAC was still moving, trying to stay in the match. But just as he climbed to his feet for a third time, Kenny hit him again and knocked him down for good.

Kenny held the championship up again, parading around the ring. He didn’t notice Orange darting toward him until it was too late. He laid him out with another Orange Punch across the jaw.

Orange crawled toward Kenny, obviously going for the pin; but Bryce was still down from Kenny’s earlier attack. However, it didn’t matter. As soon as he draped himself across Kenny’s chest, Aubrey ran down to the ring. Alex grabbed her own throat as she counted.

One.

Two—

But unexpectedly, Kenny reversed the pin and rolled Orange’s shoulders to the mat in a crucifix. Aubrey counted again.

One.

Two.

Three.

That was it. The bell rung, and Kenny’s music started. Alex let out a breath. He’d won by the skin of his fucking teeth.

She and Don both rushed to Kenny’s side as Justin Roberts officially announced him the winner. He clutched his jaw, and somehow his left hand had been sliced open. “What happened?” she asked, looking over the blood on his fingers with concern. But he wasn’t able to answer her before they were suddenly swarmed by both the Young Bucks and the Good Brothers. Matt and Nick practically pushed her aside as they congratulated Kenny, and Nick and Karl Anderson put an arm each over their shoulders and helped him up the steps to the entrance ramp. And as they all celebrated, reveling in Kenny’s stolen victory, Alex felt a sourness curdle at the back of her throat.

She was in love with Kenny. He’d come to mean the world to her over the last nine months. But she hadn’t signed up for this world.

[agentwhiskeysdarlin]

The Kiss

Pairing: Jack ‘Whiskey’ Daniels x female!OC (written in second person)

Rating:NC-17

Warnings: lots of sexual tension, use of a knife, slight violence, sexy times at the end, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it kids), Jack being himself cause that comes with a warning, I think that’s all

Word Count: 2,606

Author’s Note: Welp I am still alive and do remember how to write! Its been so long and I am so sorry about that! I hope to get back to posting more regularly and catching up on request and doing a few new things soon. Cross your fingers, manifest, pray, whatever you do I need all the help I can get! I hope you all enjoy this little fic with the cowboy! Feedback is always always welcome and encouraged! Happy Valentine’s Day y’all!! As always a big thank you to @clint-aww-no-barton​ and my Jate’kara clan both for emotional support and putting up with my ass and my meltdowns 

ao3 link for story

    “Ginger I don’t know about this.”

   Your voice held a slight tremble which made you curse yourself mentally. You looked over yourself in the mirror before letting your gaze fall on the woman behind you. 

  “Henley you look absolutely incredible. Jack won’t know what hit him. Plus this is honestly a very calm mission for it to be your first,” she gave you a smirk as she finished the last of the lace up on the back of the dress. 

  It was a breath-taking dress. It was a deep red and it had a beautiful skirt with a slit up to about your mid thigh just enough not to show off too much and a corset top that had a heart shaped neckline which was super fitting for the occasion. 

  Statesman, a secret agency you worked for had learned of a couple selling Top Secret government information. They were using art of all things as a front to do so and tonight they were holding a large gala at the capital as a celebration of the day. Valentine’s Day and the art was all to be focused around love. Statesman finest senior agent, Agent Whiskey, or Jack was set to take the couple down but him showing up alone to an event such as this one was far too risky so here you were. You worked tech along with Ginger and one of the two women who held jobs at Statesman. You never minded a dress and heels, something Ginger curled her nose up at, plus you had all the proper training so you accepted the offer to hang off Jack’s arm. 

  That thought alone was what made you tremble. Not the mission in itself. Not the knife that sat cool against your thigh. No it was pretending to be Jack’s girlfriend for the night. You wanted so badly for it not to be pretend. 

  “Henley?! You ready?” 

  Ginger’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you turned to her and gave her a nod. 

  “I’m ready as I’ll ever be.” 

  “Hey you never know this may lead to something,” Ginger finished the sentence in a sing song voice and you felt the small hope blossom in your gut. 

  You had already promised yourself you wouldn’t get your hopes too high but with every single step you took down the hall to the conference room it seems to grow. You pushed the door open and walked into the room. Champ, Tequila and Jack all stood around, their heads turning your way and all of them wore a look of pure shock. Tequila let out a whistle before smirking and glancing at Jack. He stood there his eyes raking over you several times before they met yours. The two of you shared a look that could only be sexual tension. 

  “What? The senior agent doesn’t have a line for once?” You smirked as you walked closer to Jack. 

  A crooked smirk spread across his face and he took your hand, kissed it and then twirled you around. 

  “I have to say darlin’ you are the first woman to ever render me speechless,” you couldn’t help the blush that rose on your face. 

  “You two better get going,” Ginger spoke as she glanced from her tablet to the tv in the room. 

  “We will follow you and be at the rendezvous point just in case you need backup. Get them in custody and get them back here,” Champ gave you both a nod which you returned. 

  “We got this boss. You ready darlin’?” Jack held his arm out for you and you took it. 

  “Ready as I’ll ever be,” you gave him a nervous smile and the two of you headed out of headquarters. 

  Your nerves had built up to an almost shaking manner by the time Jack and yourself walked into the building. There were more people than you thought there would be, couples bustling about and Jack’s cologne was starting to make you dizzy. You had to focus. There was a job to do and you had to push your feelings for the man on your arm aside. 

  “I think with all these people it’s going to make this a lot easier on us,” Jack whispered in your ear.

  “I sure hope you are right.”

  The two of you wondered around glancing at the art that scattered the walls. People talked about details on the artist and their work, champagne in their hands. You glanced around catching the sight of the best dressed couple in the whole place and something in your gut knew. You gave Jack a small nudge and nodded your head over in their direction.

  “That has to be them,” you whispered as you looked up meeting his eyes for the first time that night. 

  “You ready to do this darlin’?”

  You gave Jack a simple nod and a smirk to lift your confidence. As you walked away you felt Jack’s hand on your wrist stopping you in your tracks before pulling you to him and wrapping his hand around the back of your neck. His lips crashed against yours and your shock only lasted seconds before you kissed him back. The entire world around you fell away and so did your trembling nerves. When he pulled apart the two of you seemed to share the same tension filled look as you did earlier in the conference room before you broke off and went your separate ways. You glided now, with your head held high as you stepped up the stairs. You knew that the room they were secretly meeting clients in was mere steps from the stairs and you knew it would draw the woman’s attention to follow you. You sent your senses into overdrive feeling another presence behind you and hearing the sound of heels trying to be quiet.

  “What are you doing up here?” Her voice was sticky sweet with an edge to it.

  You spun around with a smile to match. The next few moments seemed to move in slow motion but all so fast. 

  “Oh just looking for that room there,” you pointed with a smirk as the both of you seemed to break into action.

  She was too slow for you and the second she charged at you, you dodged before slamming her against the nearest wall your knife just inches from your throat and her body pinning her to wall.

  “Selling Top Secret government information will get all the right peoples attention honey. You only thought ya’ll were being slick, hate to break it to you but you ain’t,” you spun her around spitting the words as you took at the handcuffs that had been rested by your knife and slamming them shut around her wrist.

  You walked her down the stairs and saw that the room was a bit of a mess and her partner was lassoed on the ground seething in anger. Jack walked to you with a smirk of pride on his face. He jerked the man up and the two of you started to walk out of the place. Jack tipped his hat at a few people in the room with apologies.

  “Well done darlin’.”

  “Thank you Jack. I had such a rush I didn’t even hear all that happening. I wouldn’t expect any less from you though,” you smirked throwing him a wink.

  You loaded up the couple, blind folding them and then heading back to Statesman headquarters. The debriefing was short and simple. You could finally breathe again or so you thought.

  “I don’t think we should let such a dress go to waste. Let me take you somewhere,” Jack spoke as he leaned on the table looking down at you.

  “Well then let’s go cowboy,” you reached out your hand and he took it with a smile.

    The restaurant was probably the nicest you had ever been in. Even in the dress you still felt like you didn’t belong. A piano player skillfully played on a small stage not far from your table but it was low enough that Jack and yourself could carry on a decent conversation. The two of you discussed your side of things during the mission, laughing in all the right places and took bites of food in between. Jack took the last bite of his food and he gave you this look for a moment that you caught. You raised your eyebrows at him which soon gathered together in confusion when he stood up.

  “May I have this dance darlin’?”

  “Jack people will stare.”

  “As they should you are the most beautiful woman in the room, hell in the world,” a smirk crossed his features and you blushed.

  You took his hand and he pulled you to the empty place next to the stage. He pulled you close and began to sway with you. Your eyes met with his and the two of you shared that look once again.

  “What was that all about?” You suddenly asked.

  “Might need to refresh my memory darlin’. I ain't got a clue what you are talking about,” the smirk on his face told you differently but you rolled your eyes and blushed a deep red again.

  “The kiss back at the gala. What was that?”

  “Darlin’ I think we both know the answer to that,” he pulled you closer his forehead touching yours.

  “I need to know for sure Jack. I’ve wanted this for far too long and I-.”

  His lips were on your suddenly but this kiss was different. It held a different hunger but it was softer, more gentle. When he pulled away you couldn't help but let out a whimper you wondered if he could hear.

  “I’ve wanted this for far too long too darlin’ and if you’ll have me I would want nothing more.”

  The smile that spread across your face could have lit the entire world up.

  “Of course I’ll have you Jack.”

  The two fo you shared another quick kiss full of laughter and smiles as the song finished up.

  “Why don’t we get out of here and head back to my place,” Jack whispered in your ear and you simply gave him a nod.

  You stopped by the table, Jack leaving a large enough amount of money to cover both the bill and the tip and the two of you practically ran out of the building. 

    Hands were everywhere as you both struggled into the door of Jack’s home. You couldn't even make yourself stop long enough to look around. All that mattered in this moment was the man who’s lips were attached to yours. Jack suddenly reached down and picked you up from under your knees and you let out a giggle as he did before reattaching your lips to his. You threw his cowboy hat off and discarded it somewhere along the way to the bedroom before lacing your fingers into his hair. It earned a grunt from him before he deepened the kiss. You felt soft sheets suddenly as Jack laid you down across his bed. He hovered over you finally detaching himself from you. Both of you panted with swollen lips for only a few seconds before Jack’s lips began to pepper across your skin. He left a trail of them across every last bit of visible skin before he dropped to his knees over the edge of the bed. You sat up, sitting back on your hands to watch him. He removed your heels slowly as he kissed along your legs you pulling you bottom lip in between your teeth at the sight. His lips made their way up your legs alternating between the two and moving your dress when need be until he came upon where your knife still sat strapped to your thigh. He threw you a smirk before his fingers brushed across your skin to unfasten it and remove it carefully. Then his lips followed causing you to let out the first moan of the night. He eyed your clothed center before moving your panties aside and without much more of a warning dove in. You jumped and let out a gasp that feel into a moan before grasping at his brown locks and pulling at them. His hand snaked up and pushed lightly on your stomach to make you lie down before his arms wrapped around your thighs. You were a mess at this mans mercy and my god had you dreamed about this too many times to count. For a few seconds you almost thought that’s all this was, a dream. That was until your first orgasm rocked through you and you were thankful for Jack’s arms or you might had suffocated him between them. He came up smiling and licking his lips. You pulled him up and kissed him again moaning when you tasted yourself. 

  “Jack I want you now,” you almost whimpered in desperation.

  “Oh darlin’ I know. I want you too. First gotta get you out of this dress,” you couldn't help the laugh as he pulled you up.

  You spun around for him and he gently started to unlace your dress, his lips falling along your shoulder and what was exposed of your back and neck as he went. You let your eyes flutter closed and took in the moment you were in and how real it finally felt. This was happening and you couldn't believe it but it was. Finally the dress pooled at your feet and you turned to help Jack out of his clothes letting them join yours on the floor. The two of you fell back into bed finally burning skin on burning skin.

  “Jack please,” you whined again giving him a begging look.

  “I got you darlin’,” he kissed you on the nose before he lined himself up with you.

  He buried himself inside of you and it was the most wonderful feeling you had ever felt. The two of you seemed to fit together like puzzle pieces so perfect and carved out just for one another. He moved first at a slow pace before you were begging for more. Your nails making soft scratches along his back as he rocked into you. His lips left marks in places only the two fo you would know about.

  “Faster Jack please,” you moaned out loudly.

  He obliged moving his hips quicker and harder. You were so close again and you grasped at him like a lifesaver. Your head flew back and without warning you let go. Your pussy squeezed around him and your entire body shook. Jack was soon behind you burying his head into your neck as he moaned and whimpered. He kept a slow pace until the both of you came down. He pulled out of you and rolled over pulling you with him. He held you there, both of you panting before it seemed the two of you let out a smile and looked at each other. 

  “That was…”

  “Amazing,” you finished his sentence in hopes you were correct.

  “It was better than that. Everything I have always thought it would be and more.”

  “Wait you have thought about us together?” You sat up and looked down at him.

  “Well hell yeah darlin’ of course I have.”

  The smile that spread across your face almost hurt but you couldn't seem to care. He pulled you back to him the two of you becoming intertwined in each other. He laid a kiss sweetly on your forehead and you closed your eyes. In that moment you finally felt safe and loved and you never wanted that feeling to end.

Tagged: @jimmythegirl​ @arcadianempress​ @discogrrl​ @immundusspiritu​ @someplace-darker​ @thisis-theway​ @ohpedromypedros-main​ @scribbledghost​ @on-the-razor-crest​ @fioccodineveautunnale​ @spookyold-saintjm​ @ahopelessromanticwritersworld​ @princess-and-pedro​ @phoenixhalliwell​ @littlevodka​ @all-hallows-evie​ @mack4676​ @perropascal​ @prettyboyskywalker​

[champagne-bucky]

Stronger

Summary: Life as the newest Avenger is tough, but a new friend is willing to help you through it

Warnings: bullied!Reader x Bucky

Notes: This is a requested one shot by @i-ve-become-fictional ! Hope you enjoy this! Like, repost, comment, and follow for more! :) 

Avenger Wrecks Billion Corporation Building.  

Newest Addition to the Avengers is Well Below Qualification Ranks. 

Are the Avengers Becoming a Joke?

President Issues a Statement Regarding New Avenger: “Y/N Y/L/N is a Hazard to Our Country!” 

The headlines wouldn’t stop, they were getting so repetitive. You get it, you suck, as an Avenger and as a person in general. Why do they all hate you so much? You’ll never understand why. It all started when James Rhodes hired you on as an Avenger. With Natasha Romanoff and Tony Stark’s passing and the retirement of Steve Rogers, S.H.I.E.L.D was looking to recruit a new member for the Avengers. You weren’t exactly top of your class strength wise, your skills excelled with computers and different types of technology. Needless to say, you had no real place on the team, unless they thought you were a gamma infected being that was holding out on everybody, you rendered useless. 

Why do you put yourself down like this? Well, the other recruits were telling you the same thing, to your face and behind your back, when Fury considered you to be in the running for the Avengers. You were just as surprised as everyone else had been when you got a final nomination to join. It was between you and a highly respected and highly decorated S.H.I.E.L.D agent. You don’t know how you managed to get that far, but considering you blew everyone else out of the water when it came to cooking up concoctions in the scientific portion of the tests and memorizing how Tony Stark built numerous Iron Man suits, from a heap of scrap metal to glorious nanotechnology, the other recruits never stood a chance. 

The team of remaining Avengers were shocked and impressed that you managed to make it as far as you did, truth be told you were too. When it came down to you and the other agent, Fury urged the team to really think about who they wanted. The votes were tied, but some poor soul thought you had potential to be an actual Avenger. What that same soul didn’t realize was with an uncoordinated member came dozens of heavily opinionated jerks from every walk of life criticizing your every move. 

There was a small group of people that supported you. They tried their best to defend you, but that small group was always taken over by the tsunami that was late night television commentators and early morning local news reporters. It was safe to say, the majority didn’t like you. 

Day after day you would train your ass off trying to get stronger. You were getting better, but you weren’t the best. You wish you could quit, but you were already in too deep. 

The building was an accident. You didn’t mean to destroy it, however it was a building that was on the midst of foreclosure, which meant no casualties were harmed because no one was inside. Despite this important fact, the media ran with it and was quick to try and call you a cold blooded killer. Not true, not even a little bit, that at least was James Rhodes would tell you. 

The others liked you. Sure, those who weren’t too keen on you took a while to warm up, but they all adjusted to your presence quickly. It seemed as though somedays they really did appreciate you. You could tell some were frustrated by you though. For instance, you had overheard a conversation from Clint and Sam voicing rather loudly how they thought you would get yourself killed because of you “careless” fighting style. 

Most days you didn’t want to leave your room. You didn’t need to affiliate yourself with the new wave of hate and toxicity the internet and it’s trolls would bring you. You wanted to disassociate yourself from the world, and yourself, for one goddamn day. However, Colonel James Rhodes would not have any of that today. 

“Due to light of the recent events from last mission, the Senate is ordering us to hold a press conference.” Rhodey announces which caused collective groans from the group. 

“Do we all have to be present?” Clint asked slouching in his chair. He really didn’t feel like facing the ravenous press today. 

“Well, actually, only myself, Bucky, Sam, and Y/N will be attending the press conference today.” You froze in your seat. A panic attack threatening to rise within you. The feeling of the teams eyes all landing on you. You’ve never had to be at the press conferences before. Usually it was only Sam and Rhodey taking the lead. 

“Kid, you’ll do fine. Just give simple and minimal answers to the press. Don’t answer any questions you don’t want to. If anything, we’ll answer them for you.” Rhodey put his hand on your back before walking away to get ready. 

—

You always had stage fright. Ever since 5th grade when you misspelled that one really long and complicated word. Everyone in the crowd was laughing at you, at least to your imagination. You remember specifically Marcy Hunter making fun of you and taunting you for weeks. Calling you stupid, getting the whole grade to think you were stupid, saying you were one of the biggest losers on planet ea-

“Hey, you ready?” Sam looked at you with concern. 

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s just get this over with.” You muttered nervously. 

—

The millions of flashing cameras and yelling journalists did nothing to ease your confidence. Every single one of them were up in arms about what had happened. No one was hurt, so why were they all acting as if a mass murder took place. 

“Colonel Rhodes, are there any updates regarding a body count from the premises of the building.” Someone shouted 

“For the last and final time, no one was in that building. It was already cleared for months before we got to it.” Rhodey looked annoyed as ever. Same questions same answers. They were just looking for an opportunity to rip on you. 

One woman eyed you up and down with her evil eyes. She was waiting patiently to get the mic and rip you limb from limb. She finally got it after about an hour into the conference. 

“Ms. L/N, how do you think this mishap will affect on the citizens of New York?” She was going somewhere with this wasn’t she?

“Well,” you cleared your throat, “as Colonel Rhodes has mentioned, the building was cleared and the citizens surrounding the area were promptly evacuated.” Sam nodded his head in approval. 

“So does this mean there has been no discussion of your removal from the team?” What?

“I’m sorry?” You questioned. 

“Well, it just seems destruction follows you wherever you go. I mean for Christ sake a billion dollar building collapses and you aren’t even the slightest bit worried that you dm could’ve killed people.” She was evil. The way her lips curled into a devilish smirk. 

“Like I’ve told the other reporters, building was empty and no civilians were near the scene.” Rhodey was getting annoyed now. 

“What I’m trying to say is, did you all really think it was a good idea to have someone with so little experience play with the big boys. It seems as though she doesn’t even know what she’s doin-“ The bitch was immediately cut off by Bucky. 

“Okay, that’s enough out of you, out of all of you. Y/N is an Avenger whether you like her or not. We voted to have her on the team, not you or you or any of you for that matter. I’m so sick and tired of seeing headline after goddamn headline about how “incapable” she is. Can’t you people focus your attention on, I don’t know, literally anything else in this goddamn world besides her. She’s made some mistake, we all have, just because she’s an Avenger doesn’t mean she’s not human like the rest of us. I swear to God I will personally rip to shreds everyone single news article that runs one more negative thing about her. So if you all can understand where I’m coming from, shut the fuck up about her and write something else. We are done here.” Bucky looks out fo the crowd angrily. The rooms falls silent after you all get up and exit. 

—

It was late in the night and you were pounding it away at the gym. Trying to forget what had transpired at the press conference. You were working up a sweat trying to rid the voices in your head. 

You’ll never be good enough. 

You’re pathetic. 

Failure.

You suck.

Failure.

Sorry excuse for an Avenger.

Failure.

Failure 

Fail-

“I thought I was usually the only one up this late.” Your thoughts stopped as Bucky’s voiced echoed from behind you.

“Never thought anyone else came down here this late.” You responded, eyes still focused on the punching bag in front of you. 

“Can’t sleep?”

“Never could.” You responded still hitting the punching bag. 

Bucky ponders for a moment looking at your sweaty form. You always looked defeated, so helpless, you always thought you were useless. He never thought that though. Bucky always saw something in you, he never saw you like the monsters in the press did. 

“Are you okay?” You sensed the concern and sincerity in Bucky’s voice.

“What do you mean?” You tried to act dumb. 

“Don’t play coy, Y/N. I know how you feel.”

“How could you possibly know how I feel?”

“Because you’re not the only one who was the media’s favorite chew toy.” You stopped punching the bag as Bucky walks over to you and leads you to the bench.

“I know how it feels, to be an outcast, to be hated by everyone. How do you think the media reacted when the dreaded Winter Soldier was joining the Avengers. Dear God, I had to stay off the internet for weeks, couldn’t even walk down the street without some asshat yelling names at me, calling me a monster.” 

You remember the public outcry that rang throughout the world when it was announced that Bucky Barnes, former HYDRA assassin, was joining the Avengers. The media had a field day with him, some even went as far as protesting the front gates of the compound demanding that this evil man be exiled for the crimes he had committed. 

“Nobody liked me, and those that did couldn’t even get their message across to the world as to why I was a good guy. I know I’m not perfect, but I’m not evil by any means. It’s taken a while, but I know it wasn’t James Barnes who did those things to those innocent people, it was HYDRA and the Winter Soldier programming.” Bucky had been going through lots of therapy since he was brought back. Steve had insisted that Bucky go to every last therapy session even if it meant he would break out of the retirement home and drag him there himself.

“I was the deciding vote, ya know. When no one else thought you could do it I was the only one who spoke up in your defense.”

“What so the heat could be taken off of you?” You shot back, the little rage bubble in your heart expanding. 

“No, stop thinking like that. I know what you may think, that everyone here doesn’t like you, but that’s far from the truth. Everyone here, they warmed up to you, they really do enjoy having you on the team, honest to God. They have their concerns thought.” Oh boy here we go.

“I agree with them on the fighting thing, you were a little choppy at first, but hey, no one is perfect. In fact, I remember one time where Sam crashed his new set of wings into the lake when the new compound was built.” You stifled a laugh.

“Hey, there’s that pretty smile.” Bucky smiled back as you fought a blush. 

“You really don’t think I’m useless?”

“Far from it, doll.” 

“Then teach me.” You finally looked at Bucky.

“What?”

“Teach me how to fight, how to be like you.” You looked up at him with pleading eyes.

“Doll, no one can be like me, you gotta be your own you.” You sighed.

“But that doesn’t mean I still can’t teach you a few tricks.” You had a wide smile plastered on your face as you hugged Bucky tightly. The first person to show you true compassion since you got here. 

“Thank you Buck, thank you.”

“Anytime doll, anytime.”

—

Two months later…

“C’mon Y/N, let’s move it, just like we practiced.” Bucky yelled at you as you did the kick punch combo again. 

It’s been a long two months, but goddamn was it worth it. Slowly, the headlines about you stopped and the people moved on to a new problem. It felt good to not be the center of attention anymore. 

Bucky recommended you to a great therapist. Together you and Dr. Han worked through your insecurities and difficulties. Everyday you were getting stronger physically and mentally. Bucky on the other hand enjoyed spending his time with you. Soon enough you became more than just training buddies, you became best friends. 

He liked getting to take care of you, helping you defend yourself. Sam always joked that the two of you were doing something more than just training, but there really wasn’t more to it. Bucky saw something more in you, he saw that scrawny little boy from Brooklyn, weak, but had the drive and passion of a soldier. Bucky looked after you as if you were young Steve Rogers, and he’ll be damned if he lets anything happen to you. 

[linkspooky]

Medaka Box top 2-5 because number 1 is obvious

I LOVE TO TALK ABOUT  HOW MUCH I LOVE MY FAVES. IF YOU EVER ASK WANT TO ASK ME WHO MY FAVES ARE FOR A SERIES FEEL FREE TO SEND ME AN ASK.

1. My love was Real - Kumagawa Misogi

No, shush I’m going to talk about Kumagawa Misogi. The only time he gets a chance to be number one is in popularity polls and my faves lists.

 My favorite thing about Medaka Box out of all of Nisioisin’s works is that the weirdoes are not just weirdoes who are accepted as weirdoes, but they’re also challenged to grow more human. 

What I really like about Kumagawa is that he gets his ass kicked constantly. You come to understand just how he developed his broken method of coping and seeing the world, but it’s also something he ultimately has to let go of. The story never lets him win and challenges him to grow. Which is why you end up rooting for Kumagawa because it’s far more interesting seeing him fail sometimes than the main characters succeeding. 

Kumagawa’s just this insane person who seems to be doing whatever he wants, the embodiment of edgy loser characters, but at the same time he’s eventually revealed to be quite human. He’s grounded in basic human desires, he wants to be happy like everybody else, he wants to have security, to protect his friends. It’s that humanity in the character you get attached too. He’s a loser, not because he’s a monster, but because he has so many very human flaws. At the end of the day, for all his flashiness he kind of just acts like a regular good for nothing. 

Underneath it all I see Kumagawa as a character whose broken in kind of an ordinary way. Nisioisin writes a lot about broken geniuses, people who are insane but also talented to some degree. Kumagawa is just like, an average ordinary guy underneath it all that’s been subjected to a shit ton of trauma and noen fo that trauma really made him better as a person and he doesn’t have some kind of special talent to balance it out. Normal people, ugly people, worthless people can be broken too, there’s no such thing as suffering beautifully. And yet, Kumagawa’s still trying to be a person, he’s trying to struggle and do better even though he’s not someone who would ever be the main character of the story. Which is why I think he’s grounded in something really relatable. 

2. I don’t care what fictional characters call me - Ajimu Najimi

Ajimu’s great because she’s literally the most talented, all knowing character in the manga, but in the end she’s just as shitty as Kumagawa. Often I end up liking these two as a pair because they’re just so integral to each other’s character arcs. 

Ajimu is a shitty person. You get all these reasons like she’s actually seven million terminals, or that she’s trillions of years old, but beyond that she clearly has a personality, and that personality is bad. She just doesn’t really care about anybody besides herself. She drags along other people with her whims. 

She’s a mastermind but at the same time she’s kind of just a petty child. For all of her grandiose reasons for manipulating people along, it’s more that Ajimu doesn’t really want to live as a person. There are characters that Nisioisin made up that are like, actually not meant to be human but some incomprehensible entity. Like, the story goes out of its way to say that Yodzuru isn’t human. In Monogatari, oddities and aberrations are not meant to be human, they’re meant to be inhuman and different. But Ajimu always struck me as a character written to be human underneath it all. Her constant announcing of “I’m a non-human” is just kind of her running away that psychologically, she’s still pretty much a human despite her weird origin story. 

Which is why my favorite part about her is how little she actually knows about being a human. She understands people like they’re toys to move around in her toybox, or roles in a script but you get the sense she doesn’t get them as like, thinking, feeling entities separate from herself. She doesn’t really understand love, or friendship or anything like that, and she doesn’t want to bother to learn anyway because she already knows everything. Ajimu literally has the script handed to her, and yet like Medaka says, she doesn’t know anything. She has to start all the way from the beginning. 

3. So let’s get married! Marry me, Marry me, Marry me! - Emukae Mukae

I used to hate Yanderes until I met Emukae. One of the differences I noticed is that Emukae is definitely not written to be anybody’s fantasy. She’s her own character all throughout. Which is what i disliked about most yanderes to begin wtih, they were always obsessed with some dude, but like never as a flaw or a character arc it was supposed to be appealing and not ugly. 

Emukae is very ugly when she’s introduced, and we get to see her just like Kumagawa work her way back into being a human being again. The reason she has to let go of her romantic feelings is because she was using them to entirely define who she was, which is why her personality appears so shallow at first. 

By the end of the manga Emukae is probably the character besides Kumagawa who has changed and developed the most, and another thing is that she does this without really abandoning parts of her presonality. Emukae is still a minus towards the end, she’s still manic at times, she just doesn’t use love as a substitute for everything anymore because she’s learned to grow an identity outside of that. She’s kind of growing into her own person over the course of the manga instead of attaching herself to either Kumagawa or Zenkichi to define who she was. 

4. I’ll become the main character - Zenkichi Hitoyoshi

Zenkichi is a send up to classic shonen protags and a subversion of them at the same time. He’s the guy who never gives up, who always makes friends, and who tries to earn everything with training, effort, and hard work. I admit a lot I like about Zenkichi is his foiling with Kumagawa (Kumagawa existing as his shadow, Zenkichi’s hard work is always rewarded, and Kumagawa’s is never rewarded). 

However, there is something unique about the character himself. That is, getting stronger never actually gets Zenkichi what he wants. Despite being the main male lead, he almost never technically wins any fights. He wins against Munakata at the beginning but that’s about it. He’s actually usually the weakest character in the group and surrounded by super strong women.

What’s interesting about Zenkichi as a protag is that his arc isn’t about gaining strength, but actually letting go of the idea of gaining strength. He wins against Medaka in the end not by beating her in a fight, but because he’s better at making connections with other people than she is. He finds his place eventually in learning to make connections with others rather than building his entire life around protecting Medaka. 

5. I’ll kill you - Munakata Kei

Munakata is fun, because he’s an interesting character concept. Every time he looks at a person he wants to kill them. Unlike Hitoshiki Zerozaki, rather than choosing to give into this urge he’s actually spent his whole life fighting against it. Which is what makes him unique, he’s basically every other serial killer that Nisioisin has ever written (a serial killer, but they’re lonely) but this time he hasn’t actually killed anybody.

Which under the surface makes him feel like much more of a normal dude. He’s actually a very human person who just happened to be born with a weird obsession with killing people. I guess one thing that makes me like this character so much is I’ve seen similiar attempts to make this character work with the same concept, but they all come off as unrelatable and weird. 

Munakata is a fully fleshed out character. He wants to have friends, wants to fight for those friends. He sometimes get self righteous. He’s serious and straight laced. He’s overprotective of those friends. He just also happens to be constantly seeking out a reason to kill someone. Munakata is even mentioned to have a bad attitude on purpose. His showdown with Kumagawa is also one of my favorite scenes in the manga, with the two of them fighting with their contrasting philosophies. 

It feels like the fact that he wants to murder every single person he meets is just an asterisk on his character, instead of having his entire character built around that fact. Which is fun. He’s actively resisting becoming the murderer who kills people for no reason because they’re obsessed with killing people trope, and it gives him a satisfactory arc over the story. Also, once again how normal he is is just fun, the second he did finally kill someone his first response was to just walk to the police station. What a dude. 

[theartificialdane]

Andromeda, chapter 3 (Vitan - Cassiopeia)

Thank you to everyone who has followed along so far, but most of all to @veronicasanders - Worlds best cowriter and beta!

In this Sutan takes over, Violet wants croissants, we visit Dior, goes backstage at a show, and we get a call.

Rating: E

Chapter 1 // Chapter 2

Sutan caught the condom wrapper with his teeth, ripping it open before dumping the plastic coating on the floor.

“Lay still,” Sutan smirked. It was the middle of the night, both of them still slightly damp from the midnight shower they had taken, Sutan getting Violet off with the showerhead, her hand around his cock, the woman shaking apart in his arms. “You’re wiggling.”

“Are you having trouble?” Violet laughed, moving slightly, the bed moving with her and Sutan groaned, his arm almost buckling as he tried to concentrate.

“Hey, I’m being serious.” Sutan looked down at Violet, a smirk playing on his lips. He was balancing over her, his weight on his arm and knees, Violet fitting perfectly underneath him if she would just stay still. “This is hard work.” God she was gorgeous. Sutan fisted his cock, the condom finally sliding on, both arms free and back of the bed. Sutan leaned down, kissing Violet, their lips meeting.

Sutan felt Violet’s hands, her slim fingers running over his chest, over his arms, touching him. “Seems like someone hasn’t been to the gym.”

“I’ve been to the gym.” It was only half a lie, Sutan still meeting with his personal trainer once a week. It was the absolute bare minimum, Sutan going three times a week when he and Violet had last dated. Sutan hated working out, but he wasn’t vapid enough to believe that he could fully escape the ruthless scrutiny of the fashion world just because he was a man.

“Just like you haven’t been smoking?” Violet smiled, and Sutan bit her neck, his teeth almost breaking skin as he groaned against her.

“Shut up.”

“Or what? You’re gonna punish me?”

Sutan pulled back, his breath caught in his throat, because he could see it in Violet’s eyes, could see it in her face, in the blush in her cheek. She wanted him to punish her. Wanted him to be in control.

“What’s your word darling?”

“Couture.”

Sutan smirked. “Good girl.”

Sutan grabbed her hip, Violet gasping, his fingers digging into her skin, laying new bruises on top of the ones already there. He pulled up, Violet rolling onto her stomach, the woman having gone completely still as he sat back on his knees, his legs holding Violet’s thighs in place.

“Tell me lovely eyes. Did you miss me spanking you?” Sutan touched Violet’s ass, his hand gently running over her cheek, the smooth, slow motion of his hand so familiar, the air electric with the energy between them, Violet thrusting back against him.

“I- I.. Please-”

/Smack/ Sutan’s hand landed perfectly, Violet’s ass jiggling with the force of the hit.

“Ah!”

/Smack, smack, smack/ Three in a row, Sutan spanked Violet with precision, continuing, the girl moaning each time, Violet’s ass growing red, her pale skin blooming with color, her entire body writhing in what Sutan had tried to understand so many times, Violet telling him that the pleasure and pain got mixed together inside of her, into a whirlpool of emotions that took her down, that drowned her.

“Tell me Violet.” Sutan leaned down, whispering in her ear. “Tell me you missed this.”

Violet whined, turning her head, her eyes closed tight, her face flush, her mouth open as she panted and nodded, a small, delicate nod. Sutan smiled, pride and joy welling up in his chest as he touched his chest to her back, his cock sliding into her, his hand in her hair, kissing Violet again and again.

“I missed you too.”

///

The bright winter sun was shining through the windows and into the hotel room, the light falling on Violet’s pale skin, Sutan tracing his fingers on her, his hands dancing over all the bruises he had left behind. He knew how much Violet enjoyed them, how she used to carry them as badges of pride, how she had even asked for them sometimes, but did she like them now? Sutan felt a slight twist in his stomach, his thought stopping as Violet stirred.

“Morning gorgeous.” Sutan smiled, Violet opening her eyes and looking at him.

“Hi...” Violet closed her eyes again, leaning into his touch, Sutan’s hand running up and down her back. “What time is it?”

“A little after 8.”

“What?!” Violet sat up, Sutan pulling back in surprise as she looked at him, her eyes wide. “Why didn’t you wake me?! I have to be at work by 9, I forgot to set my alarm, I’m gonna be late, I- Fuck!” Violet jumped out of bed, grabbing her heels from the floor where Sutan had thrown them last night. “God I can’t believe I’m this fucking stupid!”

Sutan sat up too, not really believing what he was hearing. “… What?”

“I’m gonna be late Sutan! Get your head out of your ass, not all of us can just waltz into work whenever we want, I- Urgh!” Violet pulled her hair into a bun. “What if I get fired? What if- All because I wanted, all because I- All because I couldn’t stay at home and not be a fucking slut who comes here only to, to have sex with you and- fuck!”

“Lovely eyes-“ Sutan rose, taking the blanket with him so he could wrap it around his body.

“Don’t say that.” Violet pulled her underwear on. “I can’t believe I was this careless.” Violet looked at him. “This was a mistake, I can’t-”

“Violet.” Sutan took a step forward. “You’re freaking out. Nothing happened, or-” Sutan smiled. “At least nothing that hasn't happened before. Last night was great, remember?

“It’s not about that, just-” Violet hooked her bra, twisting it around. “I never should have come, this was a mistake.”

Sutan could see that Violet was starting to really, truly freak out, her hands shaking. This had happened a few times before, Violet working herself into a frenzy, stressing herself out until she couldn’t take it anymore. He knew what was happening, knew why it was happening, but dealing with it was always different every single time. “Darling. You need to relax. We can talk about this.” Sutan took another step forward. “Darling please-”

“Don’t!” Violet held up her hand, and Sutan knew she was gone, her breath catching in her throat. “I can’t, I can’t do-, I can’t, I can’t, I-” Violet grabbed her throat, her fingers scratching her skin, her breath out of control. It reminded him so much of that night on the balcony at Raja and Raven’s wedding, Violet’s voice breaking again and again as she had tried to explain to him what was going on in her head, what was happening to her when the world closed down around her.

“Breathe.” Sutan didn’t know if it was the right move, but he had to do something. He moved into her space, taking Violet’s hand and replacing it with his own, his palm easily covering her entire throat, their foreheads touching. “Breathe Violet. Just breathe. In and out. In and out. Just breathe.”

Slowly, painfully painfully slowly, Violet’s breathing returned to normal, the woman allowing Sutan to calm her down, her pulse returning to normal, her throat no longer shaking under Sutan’s hand before he gently, oh so gently released her.

“Better now?”

Violet bit her lip and nodded. Sutan ran his thumb over her cheek, gently petting her, keeping her close.

“Can you talk?”

Violet shook her head, her words escaping her. Sutan could see she was embarrassed, and he was sure he’d feel the same too if he was in Violet’s position, but somehow, even though she had nearly just fainted, he realised that he had missed even that.

“Is there anything I can do lovely eyes?”

“Croissant.” “... What?”

“I’d like a croissant please…”

Sutan laughed in surprise. “I’m sure we can figure that out.”

///

“Yes, no- don’t worry I’ll be there in a second.” Sutan took a sip of his coffee. “I don’t know. I’ll be right down, okay?”

Sutan hung up, rolling his eyes. He liked his new assistant well enough, but he was getting bored with the modeling circuit. After he had fired Raven almost a year ago, it hadn’t taken long for the rest of his original Elite 6 to find other employment, Fo and Naomi getting into TV, Celia working as a stylist while Allison had started to take photos full time, her pictures shown in fashion magazines all over the world, and even Jaslene going full trophy wife. The only one he had allowed to stick around was Tatianna, the woman so hardworking he barely had to do anything most of the time since she was something extremely rare; a model with a brain and proper intellect. Sutan still had his golden touch, an uncanny ability to pick new talent out of a lineup, but even that wasn’t as fun as it used to be.  

Violet was sitting on the couch, one of the hotel bathrobes on over her underwear. Violet picked at the croissant Sutan had ordered for her, a cup of tea next to her plate.

“So… Should we talk about what happen-”

“No.”

“It’s good to hear that nothing has changed.” Sutan smiled, though it was the last thing he wanted to do. Violet had freaked out, she had a panic attack because of him, and he felt terrible because of it. “Talking was never really our strong suit, huh?”

“You mean talking isn’t my...” Violet pushed the plate aside puts her plate down, clearly done with her food. “Isn’t mine.”

“Don’t take all the blame darling. I could have pushed you, should maybe have pushed you-”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Don’t call you what?” Sutan didn’t know what he had done wrong.

“Darling, or lovely eyes or, or any of that..” Violet pulled her legs up, folding her arms around them. “It makes this feel real.”

“So me coming on your tits last night wasn’t real?”

Violet huffed. “Don’t be crass.”

“I’m just trying to understand. You don’t want to meet everyone, even though I know Raven would be beyond excited to see you, you’re acting weird, and I you won’t even allow me to comfort you.”

“Can’t you see it?”

“No. No I really can’t”

“Nothing has changed, Sutan...” Violet was tugging at the edge of the bathrobe, clearly uncomfortable.

“Nothing has changed from what?” Sutan knew he was pushing, knew he probably shouldn’t, but he needed to know what page they were on. Needed to know were they where going.

“Don’t make me say it.” Violet shot him a look of annoyance, but Sutan wasn’t backing down. Not this time.

“Nothing has changed from when you left me?”

Violet froze. “I didn’t leave you.”

“I’m pretty sure you did.” Sutan felt annoyance swell in his chest, actual genuine annoyance, the emotion so strong it surprised him. “Moving to Paris is almost the definition of leaving since I still live in the exact same apartmen-”

“I asked you if you wanted to come with me, and you said no.” Violet turned. “I didn’t leave you Sutan. You are the one who stayed behind.”

Sutan knew she was right, knew she was telling the truth. “That’s unfair.”

“Life is unfair, Sutan.”

“It doesn’t have to be like this...”

“So you’re telling me that if I asked you right now, you’d stay here? Because I’m not leaving.”

Sutan felt it like a punch to the gut, Violet’s brown eyes watching him and he felt every single moment of sorrow that had happened in the past 8 months. Every night of loneliness, everytime he had tried to drown his feelings in another girl’s body, every bottle he had emptied, every joint he had smoked, every Saturday he had stayed in, the world outside not even the slightest bit interesting when he couldn’t share it with her, couldn’t share it with his Violet. He wanted to say yes. He really did, but he couldn’t. His friends where all in New York, the ragtag group of party kids who had somehow turned into his family, his base, their company a cornerstone of who he was. New York had his mom, his mom who had never let him down, his mom who was getting older and older, who was so proud and never asked for anything unless she was forced, and then there was Raja, his Raja, his sister, his twin, his other half. They had never been without each other, never further away than a single floor, never apart from the moment they were born, not really, and nothing would be more real than leaving New York and the apartment he had lived in for the last 18 years.

“I-”

“That’s what I thought.” Violet took a sip of her tea, the silence between them so thick you could cut it with a knife.

“I’m here now?” Sutan looked at Violet, his stomach twisting with how weak it was, but Violet looked at him, a small smile playing on her lips.

“You are.” Violet allowing Sutan to hold his hand out, pulling her onto his lap, Violet settling down against his chest, hiding her face in his neck, his hand slowly running up and down her back.

///

Violet slipped into the Dior atelier, her coworkers all chatting and working at their various desks, Frida at Violet’s feet, the little dog running straight to her basket underneath Violet’s workstation, exhausted from their walk together into the office. It was a little after 10, the morning still in her body. Violet had planned on slipping out during the night, had planned to go home but it had felt so good, had felt so right that she couldn’t help but stay. Thankfully it seemed no one noticed that she was late, the couture department almost calm compared to how everything was during their Haute Couture fashion week in June. Most of Violet’s coworkers were in their late 40s or 50s, many of them with more years of experience working for Dior than she had been alive.

Violet pulled her lab coat on and sat down at her desk, a hot delicious flash of pain rushing over her body as the sensitive skin of her ass touched her chair. Violet picked up her small metal press, quickly getting back to the slow growing mountain of hand pressed silk flowers that she was making for a custom made client dress. The client was based in Dubai, and Catherine Riviére, the Dior head of couture, had picked Violet to work on it, her experience with Chad Michaels apparently making her the obvious choice to Catherine. Custom work was so different from actual design, from making the dresses that went on the runway. Custom work was about the client, about their wishes, what they wanted, what made them look good. Violet had already been to Dubai twice, but thankfully the client was flying to Paris to try the dress on, Violet not sure exactly how she’d get the delicate flowers packed up and transported on a commercial airline.

Sutan had made her a promise, an offer. ‘I’m here now.’ And maybe he was, but was that enough?

Violet bit her lip, her hands almost working on their own as each delicate little flower came into existence, florals still her absolute favorite to work with, no matter what shape it took.

Violet heard a small ding, her phone going off in her bag.

TEXT: Can I see you tonight?

///

“So how are you feeling?”

“Like I’m about to vom.”

“Let’s focus on keeping that inside.” Sutan sat down, Abigail Cowen looking like a ghost, which was almost an accomplishment in itself. The redhead was gorgeous, her copper hair styled in soft waves, her grey eyes stunning with the coal that had been put on her lash line. She was the opening girl for Givenchy, and the newest talent at Elite, the girl given to Sutan in the spring. “Take a deep breath, okay?” They were backstage at the show, everything about to start in under an hour, Abigail sitting to the side, the entire thing more like a beehive than a workplace for humans, everyone rushing around going from here to there and back again with everything that was needed for the show to go off without a hitch.

“Mmh..”

“Did you remember to have breakfast?”

Abigail shook her head. “I was scared the dress wouldn’t fit.” Abigail sounded almost embarrassed.

“I’ll get you a banana. You have to eat, even when you’re nervous.” She was just 18, and Sutan was pretty sure that was exactly why she had been given to him, Sutan holding his hand over her for all of New York and London, Milano a week where he had booked her for very few shows on purpose.

“Okay.”

“That’s my girl.” Sutan smiled. “Now relax, I’m here for you Abbie, and I know you’ll do amazingly.” Sutan reached out, pretending to touch Abigail’s hair, the girl laughing and moving away, batting at his arm.

“Hey!”

“That’s the attitude.”

Sutan got up, ready to find some food for the girl and get a smoke, when he felt his phone vibrate in this pocket.

///

Sutan knew he should probably not have taken the number from Violet’s phone, but if she hadn’t changed her password from when they were still together, was he really to blame?

TEXT: Who’s this?

TEXT: A tall handsome stranger

TEXT: I’m afraid I don’t know any tall handsome strangers.

TEXT: Ouch.

TEXT: Kidding. I know it’s you. You could have asked for my number Sutan. I would have given it to you.

TEXT: Sutan who?

TEXT: Ha ha, very funny. I recognize the number.

TEXT: So are you?

TEXT: What?

TEXT: Free tonight.

TEXT: Depends.

TEXT: Depends on what?

TEXT: What we’re doing.

TEXT: I have an idea.

///

[Where are you?]

[I’m working.]  From outside the tiny Chinese restaurant, Sutan looked at Violet giving the tiny cashier their order. His phone against his ear.

[Is that what you call fucking some bimbo?]

[I’m 43, Raja, I don’t fuck bimbos.]

[I know you asshole. You never act like this unless there’s a girl involved. Are you finally getting over Violet?] Sutan had felt unsure when he suggested the date to Violet, a night in with Chinese food and movies on his laptop, but somehow, Violet had said yes right away and Sutan’s hunch had been right. If it had been anyone else, he’d have tried to impress them, take them to a party, show them around and buy them expensive champagne, but somehow, somehow he knew that wasn’t what Violet wanted from him this time around, and he wasn’t sure if it was ever what she had wanted, or just what he had given her because he thought she expected it.

[It’s not what you think...]

[Maybe I’d know what to think if you showed up for dinner. You’re the only one missing! Raven is starving and I’m not going to risk my very pregnant wife eating me.]

[Eat you? Like that would sate her hunger.] Sutan took another drag of his cigarette, Frida sitting at his feet. He and Violet had gone for a walk in a park near Violet’s place, Frida with them, the little dog yipping at all the snow, so Violet had carried her the rest of the way. [You’re barely an appetizer my dear sister.]

[Are you going to be an idiot, or are you going to show up?] Sutan winced. He had told his assistant to cancel his plans, but of course she hadn’t known about the dinner with his sister.

[You’re the one who brought Raven, not me.]

[Like anything could keep her away from Paris when she gets to show off and make everyone forget you fucking fired her.]

Sutan sighed, pinching his nose. [Raj, please, that almost a year ago.]

[It was, and I’m still mad about it.]

[You know I had to. Bianca firing her and the boobjob was just the final nail in the coffin.] They had had this argument so many times Sutan knew it like the back of his hand. He had fired Raven right before her and Raja’s honeymoon, his sister in law simply not fitting the mold of what he needed from his models anymore, and Sutan wasn’t going to damage his brand for anyone, even Raven. He was known as someone with quality girls who were the best in the business, and Raven was not one of them anymore. She had trashed his office, Sutan fully expecting it, his most expensive things hidden away before Raven even showed up. He knew it was a shitty move, but he did what he had to do, and he knew that at the end of the day Raja knew that as well. It was why they where were they where today. A willingness to pay the price for staying on top.

[If you weren’t the father of my babies, I’d kill you.]

Sutan snorted.

[I’m not the father, and I’ll never be their father.]

Sutan smiled a little, Raja only calling the twins growing in Raven’s body his when she wanted to manipulate him. Sutan had known for years that there was a possibility that he would one day be a donor to Raja’s kid, his sister coming to him almost on the day she came out as a lesbian, telling him that she wanted to be a mom someday, asking him to donate his seed, the decision taking him less than a second to make. Raja was his other half, his sister, his soulmate, and if there was anything he could do for her or give her, he’d do it. Even if going in every five years to leave his swimmers in a plastic cup and a life in a freezer had felt a little weird.

Raven and Raja had announced the pregnancy on Instagram, Raven’s account blowing up while Raja had somehow been invited on several morning talk shows, the fact that a lesbian in her 40s was becoming a mom apparently a big deal. Detox had done what Detox did best, gleefully publishing everything he could about the pregnancy in his magazine, dressing it up as public service and keeping the rumours at bay, when in reality he was just making bank on gossip as he had always done. Detox, Juju and the kids then took a family vacation to Hawaii after Juju had yelled at him for the better part of Fame’s annual rooftop cocktail party.

[Sorry I’m not going to make it to dinner Putri.] Sutan stubbed his cigarette. [It’s fine.] Raja sighed. [I better get back to my baby before she starts crying.]

[Pregnancy sounds like a joy.]

Sutan could hear the smile in Rajas voice, his sister often pretending like this was a hardship, like she was suffering, but he knew she was the happiest she had ever been, this chance to make a family. [It’s fantastic.]

Sutan hung up, Violet walking out of the shop at the exact same time, the girl carrying two big bags of Chinese food. Sutan knew French, of course he did, he worked in fashion and even more he worked as an agent, but Violet was actually fluent while Sutan could only take about clothes, travel logistics and do very basic party banter.

“Did you get everything?”

“Mmh.” Violet smiled, opening the bag for inspection. “I even got your stupid hot and sour sauce.”

“It’s not stupid. It’s culinary perfection.”

“Of course.” Violet rolled her eyes, and Sutan laughed, holding out his arm, Violet taking it, the two of them looking for the nearest corner shop to buy a bottle of wine or two.

[marybeatriceofmodena]

(1/2) I agree with everything you say but I'm too afraid to say so myself. Especially because if you don't agree 100% with how Rey is being portrayed, folks think you're being misogynistic. I wish we could be more open to discussion. You can love a movie or a character and still don't agree with certain aspects of them. For example, yes, Kylo became Supreme Leader, but his "victory" was undermined 5 minutes later when Luke trolled him in front of the fo and what was left of the resistance.

continued: (2/2) His win felt like a loss, which is a good thing for redemption, but it means two failures in a row nonetheless. In other hand, Rey’s biggest loss was being wrong about Ben Solo and her parents. Yes, she made mistakes but they didn’t bring her consequences she wasn’t able to overtake in the same movie. At the end, her bad choices don’t stop her from becoming the resistance savior. It feels like she can’t do no wrong, which makes it hard to sympathize with her as much as I can with Kylo.

*

Well, I think the problem why people are a bit more “jumpy” is that there have been a lot of bad takes - on both sides of the debate. I’ve seen some pretty bad anti-Rey/pro-Ben takes myself. Like, I prefer seeing them as two flawed individuals who ended up fucking it all up because of their flaws, and because of a lack of communication? 

I might also be influenced by how star-crossed lovers stories usually go: it often happens that lovers in star-crossed romances are separated due to outdated or bad societal conventions - that’s actually EXACTLY what happened with Anakin and Padmé. And honestly, if I was writing IX, I’d follow Rose’s words about “saving what we love, not destroying what we hate” to heart, and have the war end not by the Noble Resistance/Rebellion defeating the Evil First Order/Empire (because c’mon, it’s the OT all over again, you can do better), but by people overcoming their differences, working together, and ultimately show how absurd war is. 

That’s what TLJ was about, especially in respects to the Finnrose plot: both Finn and Rose discover that the people behind the war machine don’t care about who’s the bigger dog in the galaxy and all that matters is your own personal gain - and the First Order, as well as the Resistance, all play a part in oiling that machine. Not to mention that Solo was basically an introduction to the underground crime world, who also make their profits out of weapon dealing, so I don’t think that was a coincidence. 

That’s not to say you shouldn’t stand against oppression and injustice - you absolutely should, since the opposite would be going against what Star Wars has always been about. 

But war is what has always been the cause of every single trial the heroes went through: war is what provoked the Clone Wars, initiated the enslavement of millions of men because they were clones; war is what led Ahsoka Tano to leave what was the equivalent of her family behind after the irreparable had been done; war is what eventually drove Anakin Skywalker to become Darth Vader, and killed Padmé; war is why Luke and Leia grew up and never knew who their real parents are; war is why Luke’s aunt and uncle were killed in a gruesome matter, just for being indirectly implied with a matter they wanted no part in; war is what killed not only Leia’s adoptive parents, but her entire planet as well; war is what killed people like Jyn, Cassian or Bodhi before they were given a chance to actually live a peaceful life; war is eventually what tore Han and Leia apart, destroyed Luke’s work of a lifetime, and drove Ben to the Dark side. 

So… wouldn’t it be fitting that the war is won not by a big epic battle of good vs. evil… but people coming together to pursue a common goal, and not care about clans and factions and all the like… but like the Rogue One team, do it even if you have the whole galaxy against you because it’s the right thing to do? 

If it was up to me, I’d have Rey, Ben, Finn and Rose team up and plan to take down the First Order from the inside, because it’s the best way at this point to end it all. Rey does it because she has decided to become part of Ben’s life and, to become part of his family and also finding the belonging she always longed for, she helps take down the very organization that tore them apart in the first place, but this time, with Ben, without any conditions, as equals. Ben does it because he realizes on his own that like for people like Finn, Rose, and all the Stormtroopers, the First Order has ruined his life. And if he wants to help establish a new order and make the galaxy a better place, the First Order has to go too. Finn does it because he doesn’t want to fight against his brothers and sisters in arms, and because they, too, want to be free and have lives of their own. And he accepts to do it alongside Ben because he may not understand why Rey loves him, but he trusts her. And Rose does it because in every child who has been indoctrinated by the First Order, she can see Finn in them, and with her planet being enslaved, she realizes that, well, it could have been her. 

* 

And to get to the rest of your ask… yes, Ben is sympathetic because as much as he’s an asshole, you understand why he’s the way he is. Of course he messes up. Of course he gets humiliated. He needs all those things in order to be able to grow, understand his mistakes, and learn. THAT’S what makes him sympathetic. 

Rey… obviously, she learns what really went down between Luke and Ben, which makes her realize that when it comes to heroes and villains, it’s not always the way it seems. So far, so good, and it’s actually brilliantly done. The problem is that as I said for her rescue plan, while her heart was totally at the right place, the plan itself… honestly needed more work, and Ben pretty much had to save her ass. 

And look, I’m a-okay with Rey being impulsive, jumping to conclusions, heading head first into trouble - it makes a lot of sense with her background and characterization. It doesn’t make her unlikeable AT ALL, it just makes her a fully fledged character. The problem here is when those flaws aren’t treated as such - and that’s what’s frustrating, lol. But ya know, it’s a writing problem. Not a problem with the character specifically. 

So if she can do no wrong… how can you “sympathize” with her? Because “sympathizing” with someone implies that either they’ve done something bad, either they’re involved in a touchy situation, either they’re affected by a bad situation. 

And sure, you can argue she got her heart broken - but my issue is that the movie doesn’t show that. All it took was one little scene where she leaves the Throne Room teary-eyed, looking at Ben but turning away. Instead, straight after the Throne Room fight… next time we see her is her being all happy-go-happy while shooting TIE fighters. So because of that, it makes her look like she doesn’t care - which is not what you should be going for, lol. 

But again, to know whether it’s a bad writing decision or not, we’ll have to wait until IX. But all I want Rey to realize is that in order to help Ben, and help the galaxy against the First Order, she can’t drag Ben around, and she can’t expect him to just follow her around because she thinks she’s right or her heart is at the right place. She needs to work WITH HIM. Ya know, do the couple thingy, like, TALK. COMMUNICATE. 

[made-in-the-hallway]

Sick love

Word count: 1.722

Request: Yes

Warnings: Too much loving

“My head is pounding”, you whined and you swore it was like ten axes were inside your skull and wanted you dead in a matter of seconds. It was the worst headache you’ve ever had and you didn’t have the slightest idea why it was like that. You weren’t hangover. On the contrary, you had a blissful night in with your boyfriend, and nothing peculiar had happened for you to feel that way. So, this situation only left you with unanswered questions.

“Still bad?”, your sister asked you and you flinched at the volume of her voice. She was speaking naturally, but your headache made it feel like she was shouting at the top of her lungs.

“Please keep your voice down, you are killing me”, you said and your sister got up to touch your forehead. With that simple gesture she had her answers.

“Well, it looks like you are coming down with a cold Y/N”, she said seriously and you shivered. You hated being sick and that was the last thing you wanted. It was still summer and you would spend your days drinking that prescribed syrup along with eating those disgusting soups. Apart from that, you didn’t want to force Harry to stay in with you. He would like to go out or have a nice time at the park but he would have to take care of nauseas and fevers. It was just unfair for him.

“No this can’t be happening”, you complained and your sister placed her hands on her hips. She was trying not to laugh at your state but she didn’t do a good job at hiding it. She burst out giggling and you threw a cushion at her, hitting her directly at the head.

“I guarantee you it hurt”, your sister ironically said and she went to the kitchen. She had to leave in some minutes but she couldn’t leave you behind like that all alone. So she phoned Harry.

“Harry speakin’, who’s this?”, he said through the speaker and your sister whispered.

“Hi Harry, it’s me, Y/S/N. Just wanted to let you know that Y/N might be coming down with a cold. She already has a fever and-“, she was interrupted by you screaming that you wanted to vomit and she corrected her previous sentence.

“Scratch that. She has a fever and she has started vomiting already. I have to go in some minutes so I thought I needed to fill you in”, your sister finished and she heard shuffling at the other end of the line.

“Be right there in five. Try to calm her a bit yeah? Thank yeh Y/S/N”, he said and hung up. Your sister came into the bathroom, where you were brushing your teeth, to get rid of the ugly taste.

“Thank God mom is not here”, your sister joked and your eyes widened at her statement. Your mom overreacted over the simplest of things. When you or your sister were ill, she would just call the doctor every single hour to inform him of your condition and she made sure you had all the medicine you needed. You appreciated her caring, but it would be too much sometimes.

“Don’t even joke about it. It is unhealthy”, you wiped your mouth with the towel and followed your sister in the living room where you both sat down on the couch.

“Y/N, I really need to go. Jason wants to go pick up a gift for his mother’s birthday and I can’t miss it. Promise me you won’t go around spilling soup”, she pleaded and you flipped her off.

“I will be dead in a matter of hours so no soup is going to be all over the place”, you answered and your sister sighed. You had the tendency to overreact when you were sick and no one could handle that. Your sister included.

“Okay I am going to start preparing your funeral then”, and that had always been her answer since day one. You and your sister had a weird kind of relationship. You would go on and compliment each other but you would flip each other off whereas when you would offend each other you would hug and bro fist one another. People were always confused.

“Say hi to Jason”, you tried to say before rushing to the bathroom to empty your stomach for the second time that day.

“Be sure I will”, your sister said more to herself than to you and got into her car, ready to go meet her boyfriend. Speaking of a boyfriend, Harry was on his way and he had tried to contact you but you hadn’t used your phone that day meaning it was still turned off. When he stepped foot in the house, he stopped himself from calling your name when he saw you curled up on the sofa, tissues all over you and your restless face giving away your exhaustion and pain.

“Meh poor girl”, he said and kicked off his shoes before making his way to you. You had grabbed a blanket from your room and had it wrapped around you. You were practically like a sneezing ball. Your head perked up at the sound of the door opening and closing and when you saw Harry, you snuggled closer to the blanket.

“Don’t get closer Harry, you will be sick too”, you cried out, but your voice came out muffled because of the blanket. Harry kept coming towards you nonetheless and he kneeled in front of you.

“This isn’t gonna stop meh love. How many times have yeh run to the bathroom?”, he softly asked you and you melted at his voice. He was trying to soothe you and it worked pretty well.

“Twice so far. But there’s more coming I tell you”, you said and leaned your head backwards. You wanted to sleep and Harry quite caught that.

“Okay tell yeh what. I will go upstairs and ran yeh a bath. Yeh will relax and I will call the doctor to tell meh what to do with meh sick girl. Sounds okay?”, he said and he picked you up bridal style. You found the opportunity to lean against his warm chest and breathe in his scent. You could stay there, in his arms, for an eternity and there was no lie in this statement.

When you entered your bedroom, he gently placed you on the bed, and he disappeared in the bathroom to set the right temperature for your bath. You placed your head on your pillow and sleep started taking over when Harry reappeared from inside the bathroom and scooped you up.

“No sleep yet baby. Your bath is waitin’ fo’ yeh”, he said and placed you in front of the bathroom door.

“Yeh go in there and treat yourself whereas I talk to the doctor alright?”, he turned to leave but you stopped him. You knew it would be better if he was there to take care of you. He always did. And he was so good at it.

“Mind if I change the plans a bit?”, you innocently asked and Harry grinned.

“Tell meh babygirl”, he indicated for you to go on.

“Why don’t you take a shower with me? If there’s someone who can calm me, that’s you Harry”, you spoke and you were truthful. There was no dirty intention in your proposal. You just wanted to relax with your boyfriend.

“Thought yeh never ask”, he said and slowly took your clothes off, caressing the exposed skin he could find ever so softly, careful not make you feel any more pain. He took his clothes off as well, and got into the bathtub after you. You sat between his legs and he stated kissing your back and neck, in a soothing manner, knowing you would feel slightly better. And he was right. The water was perfect and Harry tried his best to take your mind of off your sickness. He grabbed the shampoo and started massaging your scalp in an attempt to calm you.

“Just what I needed. Thank you so much love”, you said and closed your eyes, cherishing the feeling of Harry’s massaging skills. You started scrubbing your body and Harry snatched the sponge from your hands.

“Nah ah. I will take care of yeh baby. Don’t yeh worry”, he said, kissing your shoulder before he replaced some gel on the sponge. The water was running by now, and you were lost in the purity of the moment. Harry always wanted to make you feel good and he always said it was like a repayment for what you had done for him all along. After some time, he water had run cold so he took hold of your towel before wrapping it lovingly around your tired frame before he did the same with his towel on him.

“Time fo’ pyjamas babe”, he smiled lazily and he moved towards the closet, grabbing an old T-shirt of his and your favourite bottoms with little bears imprinted on them. You had worn your undergarments already and you were waiting for your pyjamas to be passed to you but Harry had other plans.

“Let meh”, he stroked your arms, while he placed your arms in front of you and put the shirt on you. He then, stroked your thighs and legs gently, like you were going to disappear or like you were the most fragile thing in the entire world. He made you feel loved. There was no denying in that. When he was done, he kissed you passionately but you distanced yourself.

“Harry, I am sick!”, you said and he smiled.

“Did that stop meh back in the shower? Don’t mind meh love. I am not that sensitive like yeh are”, he said and you tugged at his shirt.

“If that’s the case, cuddle me then”, you said and yawned. Harry placed himself on the bed and you hugged him tightly, while he played with your hair; just like you preferred it.

“I love you Harry”, you suddenly said and Harry smiled in your hair.

“I love meh sick girl too”.

And just like that, you fell asleep, feeling secure in his embrace and wishing that you could freeze time and stay like that for what seemed like forever; in each others’ loving arms.

Ugh guys, this is so sweet. Where has Harry been all the times I was ill? Before I drag my whining ass away, let me thank that person for requesting this and making me die in the most gentle way possible. Requests are still open and I am waiting for your crazy ideas people! (P.S. Harry is treating us so well lately I can’t bear it!)