#eventually i stopped wanting to go outside and play bc a mixture of depression and tired of little kid antics like that

[queseraphita]

i didn't really think about it much as a kid but being that older big sister of the neighborhood kids really shaped me as a person when i can see past the veneer of early depression symptoms and nostalgia

[iamanartichoke]

It’s almost 4am, I can’t sleep because of Reasons, and my brain isn’t functioning enough to be productive, so I’m just gonna fill out this writing meme. So, yeah, if you’re interested in some very long, self-indulgent writing babble, keep reading, and if you’re on mobile, I’m sorry the cut doesn’t work. 

1. What are your favourite genres and/or styles to write in?

Contemporary lit has always been my thing. I was never really into reading or writing much action/adventure or fantasy, which is weird because I was very into shows like Buffy the Vampire Slayer and LOST - but, I was mostly into those shows for the very rich character dynamics and developments, so. Anyway, Sanctuary is the first thing I’ve written in my life that isn’t in the contemporary, real-world genre and I’m doing okay with it, but I do sometimes get a little paranoid that it’s too character focused with not enough action/comic-genre stuff going on. This is really stepping outside of the box for me, to be honest. 

(I just remembered that I did write some Batman fanfic when I was maybe 16  or so, but I’m not sure it counts bc it was terrible and I pretty much just wrote  a Buffy-esque character to be Batman’s sappy love interest. God, how embarrassing.) 

2. What was the last writing project you finished and felt successful with?

Okay, so, when I was finishing grad school, I had to complete a “publishable” thesis project and mine is/was this collection of linked short stories that I spent probably a good year and a half (including my thesis semester) working on. Technically, I did finish it enough that it passed the graduation requirements, and I have been chipping away at it on and off since then, but after I graduated, I just ... stopped writing, in general. Depression and real life are a shitty combination for writers with very little internal motivation. But, despite that, this collection holds a very dear place in my heart. There are seven stories total, all young adult, coming-of-age themed, and they’re linked by character in that they all take place in a small town and the characters from each story sort of know each other in passing, as happens in a small town. There’s room for ten stories, because it’s a nice, even number. I love all of the characters and I think it could be something really great and could be published successfully - just, it needs a lot more work to get to that point. Eventually it will. Anyway, yes, that’s my last “finished” writing project and I do feel a modicum of success toward it, for what it’s worth. 

3. If you have a WiP how do you feel it’s going? What stage are you in?

I am actually 85% pleased with how Sanctuary is going. I started writing the fic without any real idea of what I wanted to do with it or where it would go - I was just having a lot of Loki feels during a difficult time in my life. Prior to this, I would handle my Character Feels by indulging in a lot of watches and re-watches and occasionally making music videos and sometimes fan art (graphics, I can’t draw for shit), but these methods just weren’t cutting it this time ... and hence, fic was born. 

It’s not a perfect story, of course - there are some inconsistencies and errors and the writing can always be more polished, but I’m just happy that I’ve stuck with it for this long and allowed it to develop the way that it has. I’m able to flex my writing muscles and get back into the practice of it while having fun at the same time. The story is four chapters away from completion, but I have plans for a sequel and also a couple of one-shots from Thor’s POV that I want to play around with. Overall, I’m pretty pleased with where I am in my little fic-verse right now. 

When it comes to original fiction, aside from the aforementioned short story collection, I am in the plotting stages of a novel involving reincarnation, because I am tropey trash, but it has potential. So, there’s that. 

4. What are your favourite places to write?

I actually feel like I write more productively when I am away from my apartment, which is a conundrum because I pretty much only leave my apartment to go to work or, like, the grocery store. I have a job that allows me to be at a computer for most of the day, so when I’m not busy, I like to write at work. I weirdly feel more productive and clear-headed at desktop computers, but I don’t have one of my own, so when I’m not at work or at the library, I write on my laptop in places like Barnes and Noble or laying in bed like a lazy bum. I do have a desk at home, but it is woefully neglected, I’m sad to say. 

5. Do you prefer to write with long hand or type? Or some other method?

9 times out of 10, I type. However, when I am struggling particularly hard with writer’s block, I’ll write long hand because, for whatever reason, switching methods jolts my brain a little bit and gets the juices flowing again. I wrote the entirety of the Kree battle and Val/Loki in the infirmary (I forget what chapter that was) long hand, among other scenes. 

6. Do you remember your first character? If so can we meet them?

My childhood is filled to the brim with embarrassing fiction. I don’t remember my first character, to be honest - I remember being in fourth grade and writing some kind of story for Young Author’s Day at school, and that’s the first thing I remember even writing, but I couldn’t tell you what the story was or who the characters were to save my life. When I was in sixth grade, I discovered S.E. Hinton’s books, and from that point on, I spiraled down into the genre of coming-of-age, tortured, sad protagonists (God, Ponyboy Curtis was my first spirit animal, talk about tragic) and I’ve never quite looked back. 

7. Where do you get your inspiration?

Where don’t I get my inspiration, would be a better question. Music is a big inspiration - sometimes I’ll hear a lyric that I want to put to a story, or a song will have a storyline that I like and that’ll get the creative juices flowing. I do get some inspiration from real life, but I shy away from writing anything too closely related to my own life - things that I pull from my life are incredibly fictionalized, but the roots are sometimes there, if that makes sense. Movies and TV shows, of course, especially with character types that I’m drawn to. Other people’s literature is a big inspiration, too. Idk, I think inspiration just comes from everywhere. Everyone and everything has a story that can be told. 

8. Do you outline a story before writing it, or does it all live in your head until the first draft gets put down?

I’m kind of 75/25 on this - 75% lives in my head and 25% is outlined, but the outline is always kind of a loose guideline that may end up completely changing by the time the words are actually on the page. I mostly use outlines to put things down tangibly when they get too cluttered in my head and I start confusing myself. I also use outlines to keep track of plot threads, to try to keep things consistent. For Sanctuary, my outline is a mixture of what I want to accomplish in each chapter and an extensive notes section on various canon I’m using, so that I can keep things straight. 

9. Where do you go/ What do you do when you’re feeling stuck?

Writing long-hand is a thing I already talked about. Other things I find helpful: going for a long drive to just sort of let myself zone out and think about the story without the pressure of sitting at the computer, listening to music ... sometimes I just put the story away completely and let it sit while I do/focus on other things, and I come back to it refreshed and ready to try again. 

10. What got you starting writing/doing Art? (Because I always love origin stories)

I don’t know - writing has just always been a part of who I am. The urge to write was something that came very naturally to me. I’m sure being a voracious reader was part of it, too - I grew up reading books like there was no tomorrow, and I was a very introverted, shy child, so I read more than I talked to people, and that just sort of naturally translated into writing stories of my own. I’ve never been a people-person in that I don’t like interacting with people much (in real life, anyway) but I like to examine and think about how people work, and it’s a strange thing but so it goes. But yeah - there’s no real “origin story” with me, just a long history of being a reclusive nerd. 

I guess this is a tagging meme but I wasn’t tagged, so if anyone out there wants to do it, feel free, I’d love to read other people’s responses if you feel like sharing them. :)