#eventual dukeceit

[edupunkn00b]

Overruled Masterpost

Chapter List - [ AO3 ]

Sanders

Obfuscated

Prosecution Rests

Conflict of Interest

Philosophy of Love and the Science of Attraction

History Lessons

Seven O'Clock

The story continues

[katelynn-a-fan]

Somewhere Over The Rainbow: Chapter 10

First | Previous | Next | Masterlist | Ao3

Summary: Remus and Patton deal with some...... things...

Word count: 3.9k (3871)

Warnings: Overt Homophobia, Abuse of Authority

“Mr. Cortés? I see that you are… otherwise occupied, but I have been informed you have pertinent information on this child?”

Looking up, Patton was met with a stranger’s eyes to go along with the unfamiliar voice that had so easy cut through his mind like butter, pulling him from the last dregs of the comfortable numb in his bones into the harsh light and sound and smell-

“Woah… Don’t force yourself to take everything in all at once, Pat. Just tell me if you want to answer the officer’s questions.”

Officer? Like police? He- What? Why are the police here? I didn’t do anything illegal, what- I- Why-

“Sir? Are you alright?”

Reeling back, Patton blinked as he clung suddenly to Remus as to not fall completely over. Once again, Patton met this officer's eyes, this time able to take in the officer's full face. 

Once again, Patton’s face frowned automatically as he watched the officers eyes linger elsewhere. 

“Are you okay with answering their questions? You just need to indicate yes or no and I’ll tell them later for you. You’ll have to answer their questions at some point, but you don’t have to right now.”

His finger fumbling for a moment, he squeezed Remus, moving his lips to Remus’s ear. With barely a breath, Patton mouthed into Remus’s ear.

“Eat. Breakfast. Still hungry. Talk later….please”

Pulling back, Patton’s eyes searched Remus’s incase Patton had been too quiet for him to hear. Remus smirked as he did so, and Patton’s cheeks barely tinged at the sight. 

“Sorry officers, Patton will get to you, but events happened at inopportune times and Patton (and me for that matter) haven’t had proper food in over 12 hours and we already have our meals here to eat. So Patton wants to talk after he’s had that, and he made great care to say ‘Please’ as well. Surely you officers can wait until then?”

Staring at the officers, Remus shot them a completely deadpan look. The closest officer simply nodded in agreement, shooting Patton a sad sort of smile. It was enough for Patton to manage a small smile at her. But the same couldn’t be said for the other officer, who’s expression wasn’t too out of the norm, but even out of the corner of his eye, he saw the flicker of… some kind frown on his face.

At the barest glimpse of whatever was happening with the other officer, Patton’s smile immediately dropped and turned back to Remus protectively.

Wh- I just… want to… I… don’t know exactly what I want right now.

“Okay, sir, I must stress that me and my partner are on a schedule, but we won’t deprive you of your meal. We’ll just be down the hall, so wherever you’re done, just get our attention and we can get your story then.”

Peeking out of the very corner of his eye, he saw the first officer still smiling that same way. He quickly nodded, barely able not to glance at the other officer.

That other officer… just… don’t think about him for now. For now, it’s time to eat.

Holding Patton closer to his chest, Remus’s body shifted against Patton as nodded to the officers once again.

“Thank you for understanding officers. We have been awake nearly since last night like I said, so I appreciate this.”

Relishing in the warm vibrations of Remus’s chest, Patton gently pressed his face into Remus’s chest. He was so focused on Remus’s voice within his chest that he never heard the officers’ boots walking away from only a few feet away. The only thing he did hear was Remus speaking to him once they were probably already halfway down the hallway.

“Patton? Are you okay? I’m glad they understood that you needed at least a little bit of space. You- I’m still concerned… You just shut down after I came out of Thomas’s room and you latched onto me.”

Mouth opening wide, Patton went to say he was completely fine, just tired, or the thousands of other excuses he could come up with. But the words caught in his throat instead, everything wasn’t true, he was not fine in the slightest. Should- should he admit that? Should he ignore it? Should he lie?

Patton’s mouth snapped shut.

Instead, he wrapped his arms around Remus’s shoulders and gently squeezed the back of his neck as he pulled back to look into Remus’s misty, cloudy gray eyes.

“I… I want to tell them… but… Something… I don’t know,” Patton rasped as he bent forward to press his forehead to Remus’s neck before pulling back almost immediately. “Something just doesn’t feel right… Can- Can you stay with me? When they question me? You were there too at some point, so it would make sense.”

Running his hands along Patton’s arms, Remus tilted his neck until he made eye contact with Patton again. His eyes immediately softened when they met Patton’s watery brown eyes.

“Of course, Patton. But… you didn’t answer my question. Are you okay? What’s going on in that head of yours?” 

Biting his lip slightly, Patton gazed down as his mind whirred. 

Was he okay?

Truth be told, nothing was okay in this situation. Thomas was hurt, Patton couldn’t reach him, Remus likely couldn’t work until his next shift to help him. Really, all Patton wanted to do was grab Thomas’s hand again and cry. 

But instead of saying all that, Patton wiped at the moisture on his face from his long ago shed tears and twisted his expression into a weak form of his usual smile. 

“Um… yeah… as okay as I can be… I’m willing to talk to them now.”

Raising an eyebrow as Patton evaded the true question for the second time, Remus sighed as he began to rub tiny soothing circles on Patton’s back before waving down the hall to the officers. Midconversation, the officers stop conversing for a moment and the closer one waves back before they finish their conversation as they approach the two of them.

“Mr. Cortes? Are you ready to come with us?” The nicer officer asked, stance wide but face a bit more welcoming.

Patton clung tighter to Remus at the mere idea of being apart.

“Yes- But he has to come with me as well.”

The other officer frowned, “I apologize, but I’m afraid we are only interested in interviewing you, Mr. Cortes.”

Shaking his head, Patton’s hand clenched around Remus’s now very rumpled scrubs. He couldn’t leave Remus, not now.

“No. If you can’t take him, then you can’t take me. It’s both of us or nothing.” Patton scowled, leveling a glare at the closest officer.

The words were foreignly harsh in Patton’s mouth, sharp and unforgiving, but at the moment, Patton could not care less. Remus was with him and for now that’s all that mattered. Officers be damned, he wasn’t budging an inch away from Remus. 

Sighing heavily, the first officer pinched their nose after running them along their brow. 

“Sir. All I need to know is the process of how you found this child and when you’re done you can get back to your… friend and-”

“It’s both of us or nothing.” Patton repeated with a snarl. Rotating around Remus, Patton subtly placed himself protectively between the officers and Remus.

“Yes. When you hear what happened, you’ll be grateful I’m there to support him. As a friend, I must support him any way I can including when they are being questioned during a time where they are obviously distressed.

The officers, to their credit, stepped back a moment and deliberated between the two of them for a bit, debating something with a few hand gestures before they turned back to the two of them.

“Okay, Mr. Cortes. We will allow��� Mr…?”

The officer gestured towards Remus. 

Grinning back, Remus’s smile never reached his eyes

“Mr. Remus for now. If you need more info than that, you can query the front desk for more. Now please, I’m sure you have inquired about a room where we can take your questions.” Remus’s too chipper voice chirped.

No one moved as the question hung in the air, the officers shifting uncomfortably before Remus’s thin facade smile finally fell and Remus huffed.

“Okay… you didn’t… Hffph. Well...I know a discrete place then. Follow me.” Remus ground out, his expression leveled and hard until he turned to Patton where it immediately softened as Remus pulled back just slightly even as Patton’s grip tightened. ”Patton, hold my hand, I’m not going to leave. I promise.” 

Managing to free his arm, Remus leaned back as much as he could and stuck his hand towards Patton’s with wide sympathetic eyes that had Patton’s insides melting immediately. 

Remus was sad? Because of him? He wanted Patton to do something… Patton would do it so Remus wasn’t sad at him anymore. Remus should never be sad. He was Patton’s friend and Patton’s friends should be happy even when Patton wasn’t.

Despite how much it pained Patton to do so, Patton slowly let go of Remus and placed his hand in Remus’s. Even then, each bit of him that left contact with Remus was as if parts of his very soul were being yanked from his being. Eventually, all Patton had left was the measly presence of the fingers in his, a paltry substitution for what he had before.

Breathing deeply a few times, Patton managed to get the fluttering in heart to die down as he squeezed Remus’s hand a few times. And then…

“I’m ready to go.” Patton whispered only loud enough for Remus to hear and was met with an answering squeeze.

Pulling lightly, Remus stepped forward to signal Patton to follow just slightly behind. The officers trailed behind the two of them awkwardly as well, their pace interrupted every so often when they had to stop for a doctor or another nurse or the various inattentive patients they encountered. 

As a bed was pushed out of a room suddenly, Remus pulled sharply to a stop, causing one of the officers to run into Patton from behind.

“Oof!

In an instant, Remus whipped around and glared at the officer after registering what had happened. The officer backed up immediately, holding up one of their hands up in apology while the other dipped to their belt. Tugging on Remus’s hand, Patton shut down the moment with a frown.

Unaccustomed to the building, Patton was lead down an endless number of corridors before Remus slowed and announced a bit too cheerfully to the group.

“We’re here!” 

Slowing down, Patton could help but frown as they stopped at a non assuming looking door that at first appearance didn’t appear to be capable of housing a room big enough for the 4 of them.

“SIr, I don’t think-”

The officer was cut off as Remus tugged Patton forwards, Patton’s frown slowly fading as Remus opened the door.

Patton froze, eye wide as he let go of Remus’s hand.

The room around them was decorated in brightly colored animal patterns on the walls, boxes of toys in the corner, but the creme de la creme was the pure mound of stuffed animals ranging from smaller than a beanie baby to at least as big as a toddler and bigger.

Unable to contain the impulse to make a sound, Patton let out a squeal as heran over nabbed the giant frog plushie that was nearly half the size of him, hugging it so hard he would’ve squeezed it to death if it were alive. Running his hand along the material, the texture of the frog mesmerized Patton as he sat down that he didn’t snap out of it until Remus’s quiet “Patton” snapped him out of it.

Gazing up with a no doubt dazed expression on his face, it took a moment for Patton to stiffen and bolt up, still clinging to the giant stuffed animal.

“Sorry. I got a little excited. It’s been years since I’ve seen or had one of these this big. I’m…” Patton glanced to Remus, shuffling closer to him as subtly as he could. Eyes flickering to Patton, Remus stepped beside Patton once again, placing a gentle hand on Patton’s back  “...ready to answer your questions.”

With an expression that oozed a “ugh,finally” sort of attitude, the farthest officer crossed their arms as the other officer nodded.

“No worries, Mr. Cortes. Now…” Producing a notepad and pen, the closer officer began.

“Okay. First. I need to ask, how much do you trust Mr. Cortes here? And Mr. Cortes, how much do you trust this man?”

Remus didn’t even glance a moment at Patton before he responded, the hand on Patton’s back slowly beginning to move in circles on Patton’s back.

“With everything I am, officer.”

His shoulders still trembling slightly, Patton nodded, pressing his face half into the stuffed animal..

“As do I.”

The notepad officer blinked, but dutifully jotted something down quickly before continuing.

“Where did you find this child? Do you have any idea who could’ve done hat happened? Do you know….”

And so the questions went. 

The officer let Patton explain what he had seen, with a couple of pauses for Patton to press his face into the stuffed animal to stifle a sob. But all the while, they simply asked questions to prompt more details, nothing that dug deeper than Patton was willing to go. 

Thomas’s tiny body was still etched into Patton’s brain, curled up and frozen half to death on his front porch, no parent to be found. In a lull in the questioning, he found himself wondering exactly how long Thomas was in below freezing cold with nothing so much as a coat or any protection past the rags Patton found him in. He was so thin and cold and unmoving and blue and-

“Mr…. Cortes?” The nice officer gently prompted, enough to still jolt Patton out of his thoughts abruptly. Bringing his head up, he smiled apologetically at the officer who had tilted their head curiously.

“Sorry, Officer… Um.. Officer….”

Smiling warmly, the nice officer shook their head slightly.

“Call me Officer O’keefe.”

A note of familiarity rang through Patton’s brain, but he didn’t pursue the feeling as he instead smiled warmly back at Officer O’keefe.

“Thank you, Officer O’keefe. I apologize for becoming distracted, I just… I just keep seeing him… the way I found him…”

“Hah-” The officer at the door scoffed, arms crossed as they leaned back against the far wall.

Tensing, Remus’s hand halted where it had shortly resumed rubbing Patton’s back. Much like back near Thomas’s room, it was Remus that stepped in front of Patton protectively.

“What’s so funny, Officer? You don’t appear to be taking my friend’s words seriously.” Remus’s tone was low and dangerous. It took only a moment for Patton to try to get past Remus to stop him as surely the Officer didn’t mean it, but the moment Remus stuck his hand out to stop him, the Officer made another sound and finally pushed themselves upright.

“Oh nothing’s funny. It's that I find it hard to believe you didn’t hear anything. I find it hard to believe you would just find this child on your doorstep.”

Oh.

Oh no they didn’t.

If Patton had any doubts about their intentions and if they meant it, there was absolutely none in Pattno’s mind now.

“Are… you suggesting we didn’t see what we saw?” Patton’s voice was borderline challenging, but he didn’t care. He cared about this child with literally all he was, damn it! No one could get in between them, much less someone who won’t respect and completely disbelieve the very man who saved them!

I shouldn’t have to justify myself like this! This person… how can they be so unprofessional? Asking questions like this to us- me?

“That’s exactly what I’m saying-”

“Officer-” Officer O’keefe tried to interject, but the other Officer continued.

“-because faggots like you are not the most trustworthy people. With whom you ‘want’ to marry and all.”

Patton’s vision tinging red, he’s surprised he isn’t the one pouncing on the officer as Remus’s expression morphed into complete and utter fury and Patton has to latch onto him just to keep him from doing the same.

“Ah! Patton, let me go! I won’t let you be talked to like this! LET GO!”

The unidentified officer immediately had both their hands hovering at their waist, both near their taser and their gun. 

But the room grew instantly still and quiet as Officer O’keefe’s voice filled the room.

“Officer Dexter! Come here. And Mr...Remus, I would propose that you do not attempt to physically attack an officer of the law. Neither of us want to do something that we would regret, would we now?“

Struggling in Patton’s hold only a moment longer, Remus abruptly stilled, blinking as he looked over to Patton who had a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead from the effort of holding him back. It was as if a truck hit him as Remus immediately cupped his arms as gently as he could around Patton, murmuring apologies quiet enough only Patton could hear. It didn’t escape Patton, however, that every so often Remus would glare over towards the two officers.

The officers, on the other hand, were nestled in the corner of the room, with the nice officer half-yelling yet managing not to fill the small room with their commanding voice. Ducking their head, the other officer had their eyes on the ground as they were getting reamed out by the other officer.

“Officer Dexter! I am ashamed of your conduct with civilians! If you have personal convictions of a victim or a witness, I suggest in the future, you fucking keep them to yourself or you might find they won’t hesitate to lash out for the comments, much like Mr. Remus rightfully fucking did. Be grateful I’m not reporting you directly to our boss for this, as I don’t want to deal with your bullshit much longer. After this, you have to explain to them why the last willing officer to train you also rejected you,“ Officer O’keefe snarled, lowering their voice as they turned around to Patton and Remus, their eyes sympathetic and apologetic even without words. “I apologize for my trainee’s misconduct. They will be punished accordingly. I hope the added stress they caused was not too detrimental.”

Shaking their head, they gestured vaguely to Officer Dexter to peel themself from the corner and pointed to the door without even looking. The moment the door clicked shut after Officer Dexter silently slunk to the door, sending a surprisingly half-hearted glare to the two embracing men, Officer O’keefe sighed and pinched the bridge of their nose as some of the tension in their forehead finally smoothed over.

“Is there anything else you can think to mention about the night? Any information that would help the investigation?”

Opening his mouth, Patton was about to tell them that they didn’t have anything more, but the words stalled as all that had happened the last 24 hours re-ran through his head. Instead, he straightened up cupping Remus’s hand on him.

“They… Whoever did this… did… unspeakable things to him. If you or any of your friends find out who did this, don’t go easy on them. It’s the least they deserve.”

It took a moment, but as a flash of comprehension gleamed in Officer O’keefe eyes, their fist clenched and when they replied, their voice was barely steady.

“Of course, Mr. Cortes. You can go back to the boy now, I hope the complications will be resolved… You are very caring and kind, don’t ever lose that. And Mr. Remus,” Remus’s hands twitched on Patton’s back as the glare still trained on the door where Officer Dexter had fled glided over to Officer O’keefe, softening only slightly. “Never stop protecting the things you care about.”

Nodding stiffly, Remus patted Patton lightly on the back, guiding him to the door.

“Goodbye Officer O’keefe.”

“Thank you, both of you.”

Quickly pushing open the door, Patton hesitated only to throw the frog stuffed animal back into the pile where it belonged. After he turned back, he wrapped his arm around Remus like Remus had before as they squeezed through the narrow doorway.

Outside in the hall, they passed Officer Dexter making themself as scarce as possible when the two of them passed.

“I’m sorry.” Out of earshot of Officer Dexter, Remus whispered quietly as other nurses walked by, giving both of them a vaguely confused look. Waving vaguely back to the nurse, Remus met their eyes and shook his head. 

Remus would probably have a story to tell later. But for now, held fast to Patton instead.

“For what?”

Gazing down, Patton blinked innocently even as Remus’s brows drew together as he met Patton’s eyes. However, Remus’s eyes just as quickly escaped the gaze back to the ground.

“What do you mean? I’m sorry for freaking out and trying to- Trying to-”

Hand around Remus’s side, Patton squeezed gently enough to raise Remus’s eyes right back to Patton’s. Eyes so suddenly full of regret and pain that Patton stepped to the side against the wall of the hallway. 

“Hey, no! I meant that you had nothing to apologize for when I asked that. You had every right to be angry at what that officer said. I would never fault you for having emotions.“ Running his hands up Remus’s arms, Patton quietly whispered barely above a mere breath as he wiped under Remus’s eyes where moisture had gathered.

“But- but I made you hold me bac-” Remus’s voice tapered off as Patton’s stern look met his.

Pressing a gentle kiss on Remus’s forehead, Patton’s face softened.

“You did no such thing. I did that because I wanted to. Don’t you dare put yourself down like that.”

Leaning into Remus, the edges of Patton’s lips turned up as Remus melted into him, those same apologies in the room coming back before Patton murmured assurances silenced them.

It took a long moment, the quiet back and forth cut short as a random announcement was projected over the overhead intercom, both of the men jumping even as they held the other. Both of them looked around wildly and they both faced each other at the same time, bursting out in giggles as the tension of the situation finally dissipated. 

In moments, the giggles tapered off into heavier than usual breaths until Patton gripped Remus’s shoulder with a sigh.

“Come on. It’s been more than enough time away from the other two. Let’s get back.” 

Between shuddering breaths, Remus nodded and groaned quietly as Patton wrapped his arm around his back and leaned the barest amount on him.

“Okay. I- I...” The words died on his lips as he perked his head up, an echoing announcement reverberating from down another hallway. Eyes cast randomly to a nearby wall, Patton opened his mouth to ask what had caught his attention when Remus’s back tightened in an instant.

“Wha-”

“They called Dr. Kagan for something. We need to get back now.”

[nb-octopus-writes]

Masterpost — once you're in the hive, the other bees assume you're supposed to be there

[General Masterpost]

~~~~

[Ao3]

Summary:

Virgil accidentally gets absorbed by his best friend's brother's polycule.

In his defense, they keep feeding him every time they see him, and Patton's cooking is really good.

~

Status: In progress

Posted Wordcount: 14.7K

Ships: Established LMP, Dukeceit, Moceit, and a side of Remy/A Bunch of People. Eventual Remile near the end.

Main Tag: #Accidental Polycule Infiltration Fic

Additional Tags: #sanders sides #polyamory #creativitwins #dukeceit #logince #logicality #royality #LMP #mociet

main blog catchall tag: #polycule infiltration

wip snippets tag: #wip: accidental polycule infiltration (chrono link) ~ Snippets start at the beginning of Chapter 10: Game Night Continues

~

Chapter 1: Halloween Party | 1.9K

Chapter 2: The Morning After | 3K

Chapter 3: A Series of Unintended Events | 1.3K

Chapter 4: The Second Morning | 1.9K

Chapter 5: The Most Accidental of Thefts | 2.4K

Chapter 6: Baiting the Trap | 1.7K

Chapter 7: How They Kept Him Very Well | 1.1K

Chapter 8: One Could Get Used to This | 1.5K

Chapter 9: Come for the Bike, Stay for the Game Night | 3.5K

Chapter 10: Game Night Continues | WIP

[azacat-alias-lost]

(FIC DESCRIPTION AND CHARACTER DESIGNS UNDER THE CUT)

Deep within the white-painted halls of the Cade Astronomy Center, a scientist works. He prefers to work alone. That may change when a new assistant comes his way...

OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCING THAT I WILL BE POSTING IRRATIONAL BLUE ON THIS SITE!!

Irrational Blue (Dr. Gossiteure's Diary) is a Sanders Sides sci-fi AU fic, mostly centered around the Logicality ship, but with some Prinxiety and Dukeceit in there too. The story follows one of the head researchers at the Cade Astronomy Center, Dr. Logan Gossiteure, as he works through his past, his emotions, his trauma, and a newfound crush on one Patton Coralou.

Things start off small, but eventually, he and Patton discover that things are much bigger than the lab, and that there's things in Logan's past that may be otherworldly...

The fic will be coming out chapter-by-chapter on this site, and when (if) it is finished, I will post the entire thing on AO3. The trigger warnings are likely going to be many, just fyi. Every official post about this fic will be tagged with "#irrational blue official post"

Hope you're excited! Prologue comes out right after this, ch1 comes out tomorrow :]

Here's the boys:

[monkeythefander]

Dukeceit Headcannons 💚💛

I wanted to participate in Dukeceit Week 2024 somehow, so since I don’t have time to draw anything I thought I’d write some headcannons based off of the 7 prompts for the ship week.

@dukeceit-week-2024 @imnotgrimimjustagrumpyreaper

The prompts were the following:

April 6th- Sunflowers/Ocean

April 7th- Road trip/Roadkill

April 8th- Cats/Rats

April 9th- Teeth/Hair

April 10th- Cowboys/bootleggers

April 11th- Bodyswap/Sharing clothes

April 12th- Coffee shop/Dive bar

April 13th- Antiquing/Free day

Content warnings: mention of roadkill (dead animals), mention of having funerals for said roadkill, mention of hair clips that look like teeth, brief mention of battles, mention of a dive bar and drinking alcohol. Let me know if I missed anything else.

Click below the cut the read the headcannons.

——————————————————————

- For their first date, Remus and Janus decided to go out for dinner by the beach in the imagination. Remus wanted to give Janus some flowers, so he picked a bouquet a sunflowers. Of course, Remus ended up picking sunflowers were dead because they were from his side of the imagination. The creative side was a bit worried that his date wouldn’t like the flowers since they were dead, but Janus smiled when Remus gave him the flowers and said the bouquet was lovely. The couple then had their dinner, and afterwards walked on the beach. Remus convinced Janus to take off his shoes and stand in the shallow part of the ocean with him. Remus playfully kicked some water at Janus and the two end up chasing each other around and splashing each other. Overall, it was a good first date.

- Remus and Janus like to take road trips through Roman’s side of the imagination once a month. The two drive around in a car and occasionally stop to cause chaos. On their trips they’ll sometimes stumble across some roadkill. In these situations, Remus will have Janus pause their journey for a moment in order to have funerals for the roadkill.

- For Halloween, Janus and Remus always wear matching/couple’s costumes. Their first Halloween together, they dressed as a rat and a cat. Remus was the rat because like rats, he likes to dig through garbage. Janus was the cat because like a cat, he sometimes makes a purring noise when Remus cuddles him, because Remus feels very warm and the cold-blooded deceitful side finds the body heat very calming. Janus was embarrassed when he purred for the first time, but Remus just smiled and said he found the sound adorable.

- Remus’s hair would often get in his face since it’s somewhat long. He found having hair blocking his eyes to be annoying, but couldn’t find any clips or hair styles he liked to fix it. Janus noticed Remus’s hair style struggles, so he asked Roman to help him design hair clips for Remus. Once the design was planned out and made, the deceitful side gave Remus hair clips that looked like teeth. Remus loved the clips and would wear them often.

- For the second Halloween Janus and Remus celebrated together, they dressed up as Woody and Bo Peep from Toy Story. Remus wanted to reuse the cowboy costume and Janus already has a shepard’s crook, so the costume choice was easy.

- Remus likes to borrow Janus’ hat and capelet. The dark creativity says it makes him feel more powerful and like a fairytale villain when he battles with Roman.

- Remus made a dive bar in his side of the imagination for him and Janus to go to. The two frequently go there to drink and slowdance. Janus uses these outings as an excuse to wear the fancy dresses he owns.

- There is an antique shop in the Light Side of the imagination. Janus likes to go over there occasionally to look for decorations for his room. He’s found a few nice paintings of snakes when shopping there. After they started dating and it got closer to Remus’ birthday, Janus wanted to find an antique item to give as a birthday present. The deceitful side did a lot of searching and eventually found an old, wind-up rat toy. It would be the perfect gift for Remus. So, Janus got the wind-up rat and gave it to Remus on the creative side’s birthday. Remus loved it and proceeded to send the rat toy running around the light side of the mindscape. The creative side hoped the rat toy would scare the light sides. Janus just watched his boyfriend’s antics with a smile on his face.

——————————————————————

End notes: Thanks for reading! As always, if you like any of these headcannons and want to make a fanfic or fanart based on them you can. You just need to ask me first, and then tag and credit me in the post so I can see it.

-Monkey💜

AO3 Link to these headcannons: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55072036

[tulipanthousa]

Ok I’m super curious now- do you headcanon any other sides as canonically fucking or just dukexiety? I know I’ve got my personal categories of nah/just so much UST/badly resolved ST/ST resolved very very thoroughly but I’d love to hear yours!!

i know anxceit exes is hced a lot but i mean. look at them. i dont think either of them were abusive or anything i just thing they had really different goals and eventually the built up frustration/resentment bubbled over and it fell apart. had hatesex at least once after the start of canon

Patton didnt have sex with anyone UNTIL after POF when Janus took him home and blew his mind so i think they are boinking on the reg now

in the reverse of anxceit, i think prinxiety had hatesex one time either before or toward the very start of canon, and currently theyre sappy-fucking like rabbits on every surface available and everyone else h a t e s i t

dukeceit has sex and its bizarre playing-with-the-imagination shit with claws and tentacles and such most of the time. occasional sap when one of thems particularly frazzled

i think Logan's got..... Something going on with Janus and Remus and has for a long time, starting somewhere around the beginning of canon. dont know what it is, exactly, something like going over there to get Dommed when he's really fucked up brainspace wise (sexually or not), and i feel like he's probably super ashamed of it. someone rail that nerd until he can stop thinking for ten minutes

[i-am-bitterly-jittery]

Follow Your Aro

The aromantic follow up to Perfectly Normal

Word count: 871

Rating: gen

Pairings: platonic Dukeceit, platonic or pre-qpr Intrumoxiety, background Roloceit and Moxiety

Warnings: self discovery

In honor of Aro Week (next week, Feb 18-24) I’ve written a companion to my projecting ace on Remus 💚💚🤍🩶🖤 ♠️

~~~START~~~

“JANUS!” Remus yelled as he threw open the door to his and Janus’s shared dorm room. 

“Hello Remus,” Janus said without looking up from the assignment on his desk. “I’m sure the other people in our building are really appreciating your volume, thank you.”

“Any time, Snakey!” Remus grinned, throwing himself onto his roommate’s bed despite being three feet away. “Hey, I have a question.”

“I would love to help you at this exact moment, Rem, I definitely don’t have to finish this assignment before my date with Roman and Logan tonight.”

“Perfect! What are romantic feelings?”

Janus set his pencil down and turned to face Remus with an arched eyebrow. “They’re the feelings you have for a romantic partner? Are you okay?”

“Noooo,” Remus whined, sitting up and pouting. “I know what they are! I mean, like, how do you know you’re feeling them?”

“Oh…” Janus blushed. “It’s like, when you’re alone, and all you can think about is them. Or when you’re having a bad day, but when you see them, you think ‘oh, there they are’. They’re just… it’s so nice to be around them.”

“But that just sounds like friendship!” Remus huffed, flopping back onto Janus’s bed and glaring at the ceiling. “How do you know it’s different than friendship?”

“I don’t want to kiss my friends,” Janus deadpanned. “No offense.”

“Ew, none taken,” Remus stuck his tongue out at the thought of kissing Janus. “But I don’t want to kiss anyone.”

“I don’t know what to tell you, Rem.”

“Eh, I’ll probably figure it out when it becomes important,” Remus shrugged. 

“Sure,” Janus agreed distractedly, focusing once more on his assignment. 

~•~•~

It hits Remus like a wrecking ball two years later.

He placed his game controller down on his desk, shut his console off, and walked away. He didn’t save the game, but it was okay, he wasn’t ever going to play it again. 

Downstairs, he found Patton sitting on the couch in front of a DVD menu screen, so he threw himself onto the couch and buried his face in Patton’s lap. 

“Everything okay, kiddo?” Patton asked, only mildly shocked from the intrusion after having been friends with Remus for nine years. 

Remus just let out a long, loud groan. 

“That’s okay,” Patton said, rubbing his hand along Remus’s back comfortingly. 

“You’re in my spot,” Virgil complained, coming back from the kitchen with what smelled like a bowl of popcorn. Remus didn’t move. 

“That’s okay, honey,” Patton said. “There’s plenty of room over here.”

The couch dipped as Virgil sat down on Patton's other side. Virgil poked at Remus’s head with his fingers, but Remus didn’t react other than to groan again. 

After a moment, the movie began playing, and no one spoke further. Patton’s hand continued rubbing along Remus’s back, and eventually, Virgil’s hand found its way into Remus’s hair.

Remus fell asleep like that. 

He woke up some time later. Virgil’s hand was no longer in his hair, but Patton’s hand was still on his back — though it had now stilled — and the movie was still playing. 

Remus sat up groggily. 

“How ya feeling, kiddo?” Patton asked quietly. Virgil was sleeping with his head on Patton’s shoulder. 

“Fine,” Remus croaked. “Better.”

“That’s good,” Patton smiled. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“I was playing a video game, and it was making me feel icky, and I realized I’m aromantic.”

“You just realized you’re aromantic?” Virgil asked incredulously without opening his eyes. 

“Shh,” Patton shushed, petting Virgil’s head. “I’m sorry your game made you feel icky, Re, what happened?”

“It made me pick a character to date, and then it made me have an awkward conversation with a different character who liked me.”

“Gross.” Virgil agreed, hating any awkward NPC interaction video games forced on him. 

“Do you want to pick the next movie?” Patton offered, gesturing at the end credits scrolling across the screen. 

Remus perked up and jumped to his feet to pick out a movie from the house DVD before realizing something. “I’m crashing your Valentine's plans, aren’t I?”

“No,” Virgil answered immediately. 

“We like having you here, kiddo,” Patton smiled, patting the space Remus had just vacated on the couch. 

“Really?” Remus asked skeptically. Patton was way too nice to ever kick anyone out, even if he was trying to have a nice date with his boyfriend. 

“Really! We would have watched movies in our room if we weren’t okay with you joining us!”

That was a fair point, no matter how many lectures on the effects of watching TV at bedtime Logan gave, Patton and Virgil continued to have a TV in their room so they could watch movies alone when Virge was feeling too peopled-out. 

“Pick a movie and sit down.” Somehow, Virgil’s grumpiness was even more convincing than Patton’s cheeriness. 

Remus popped Coraline into the DVD player and happily joined Virgil and Patton back on the couch. 

“But seriously,” Virgil said after several minutes where Remus had thought he’d gone back to sleep. “How did you just figure out you’re aromantic? Should I have told you?”

“I’m not that obvious!” Remus sniffed indignantly. 

“Sure.” The eye roll was practically audible. “Whatever you say, Re.”

~~~END~~~

I spent several years trying to figure out if I was aromantic or not, but I couldn’t figure out what romantic feelings were (which honestly should have been a hint) so it took a video game forcing me to date an NPC to go “I still don’t really get what romantic feelings are, but they’re def gross”

Anyway I now avoid any video game that involves potential romance

General taglist:

@royalty-of-all-things-snuggly @pixelated-pineapple @arsonic-knight @misunderstood-shadowling

[where-are-the-spooky-gays-2]

Holy shoot I found a draft to a (somewhat abandoned but really it's more forgotten and left to collect dust as I put focus onto other projects) fic and it very casually has HEAVY Virgil x Remus shit in it. How could I have forgotten this fic was one of my babies. Maybe it's because their ship wasn't the main focus (but also it sort of was????)

It's a fic about Janus and Virgil being engaged in an arranged marriage that benefits both their kingdoms, but Janus has second thoughts about it and wants to back out but due to pressure he alone places on himself, he decides to go through with the engagement. Meanwhile his Lil bro Remus is A FREAK and madly in love with Virgil for their entire courtship. Virgil and Janus both know (Remus is being anything but subtle), and they think it's mildly endearing.

Eventually Janus calls off the wedding cuz he doesn't want to lie to Virgil, and Remus sweeps him off his feet and takes Janus's place, Rizzing up Virgil completely with his charms (who cares if other people find him gross and unnerving, Virgil found himself a freak who matches his energy)

Then there's two entire other side plots with Roman and Logan (Logan being Virgils younger brother and Roman being Remus's twin) having mad beef with each other but they accidentally-on-purpose make out, and Janus falls in love with a cursed boy who turns into a frog.

-🐀

OOOOOH!!! That sounds S O fucking good!!! Brotherly Dukeceit is S O damn underrated but I'm cackling at the fact that Ree makes it so painfully obvious that he's into Vee and Jan's just like "T A K E H I M I want the Frog in glasses" XD (Also that's so R E A L Logince S H O U L D accidentally-on-purpose makeout as a treat /light hearted)

[pencilpat]

Sanders Sides: College AU

Part two of this AU! Here are the character sheets for everyone. Both Logan & Janus are transfem in this AU. Prequel, Part 1

Featuring queerplatonic logince and implied future dukeceit!

Janus and Remus have some realizations about each other as they begin to settle into sharing a space. Roman attempts a confession again, with much more success. Virgil and Patton are doing well, and enjoying pulling the strings behind getting their friends together.

3,970 words

CW: brief mention of ableism from a parent, character living in poverty, swearing

▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸▸

Janus leans against her wall, pinching her eyebrows with a sigh. “So, a whole coffee shop right at your disposal wasn’t enough?”

Remus barely acknowledges her, simply continuing to set up the coffee maker he purchased while she was at school, humming to himself.

“Remus, I don’t even drink coffee. How do you expect this to be of use to me? In my apartment.”

“Ah please, it’s fine! If anything, I’ll just take it with me when I leave!”

“Yeah. Leave.” She pans her gaze over what once was her living room, however small and crappy it was. It’s now covered in folded piles of Remus’s clothing and miscellaneous junk. Sighing, she stumbles out of her crutches to rest them by the door, pressing her weight on the kitchen counter. “Remus…” she begins, but doesn’t even know what to say.

Hell, this is just as strange and surreal as it was last night when she got the text. Remus looks different, older, and healthier, with significantly more piercings and obscene tattoos. She can’t tell if he did them himself or got them done, but they do suit his ‘quirky’ nature. The wisp of a mustache above his lip is now filled out and curled. Him being entirely shirtless when she got home was also a surprise. When he said he needed a place to sleep she had assumed he would be sleeping here and not much else. It makes sense that the twin’s shitty parents got rid of Remus eventually, and the thought makes her pinch her lips together tightly. She observes him working to screw tiny screws into plastic, ashamed as she finds herself eyeing his lean muscular build. She scoffs at herself and walks the rest of the way over. It's just Remus, same idiot as he was in high school – she knows him and how to handle his eccentricity.

“Remus, the instructions call for the bigger screw for that hole-“

“Oh, I bet they do!” Remus chuckles, standing up with his hands on his hips to glare at the machine like it purposefully caused him to pick up the wrong screw. “Everyone’s always looking for a bigger screw aren’t they,” he says, this dramatic, pouting lilt coating the words. She snorts out a small laugh, a sound that seems uncharacteristic for her, yet one that Remus always used to draw forth.

“I’m sure they are with you, maybe,” she says in mock sympathy. Remus stands up straight and gasps at her, mockingly offended.

“Are you only good for witty quips or are you gonna help me build this thing?”

“I don’t drink coffee.”

“Huh, makes sense you don’t have the energy to help then!” Remus sticks his tongue out at her and goes back to his fiddling. She laughs breathily, and walks along the walls to her bedroom, overwhelmed.

She drops against her bed like a sack, muscles aching from a day of walking. She lays against her pillows and listens to her own breathing rasp slightly. Living with the mildew is taking its toll as well, she assumes. She blindly fumbles on her bedside table for the familiar feel of her over-the-counter pain medicine, taking two dry. Too tired to get a drink. Too tired to get up much more at all for the day, most likely.

Ah, but she does have to. She groans. Bananaconda, curse you and your feeding schedule, she grits her teeth, cursing her beloved pet for being so beloved. Her snake’s cage takes up and entire wall of her room pretty much, always present in her mind. She’s one of her main joys in life though, and God damn her if she doesn’t take better care of Banana than herself. She sits up again, giving herself a moment before pulling herself up fully to standing, stumbling over to the minifridge full of mice.

Bananaconda eats very willingly, thankfully, making her life slightly easier in its turmoil. She made sure to stroke her scales gently for a moment a bit before feeding her as well. Anyone who says snakes don’t thrive on affection is an idiot in her eyes. Janus sighs, watching the monthly lump of food slip along her pet’s belly. “I’m jealous of you, baby. If only I could sleep that much.” She laughs at her own murmured words, and half-stumbles half-crawls back to bed.

She’s resolved to study in the morning already when there’s a knock on her door. She hides her face in her pillow and groans. Loudly.

“Janus! There’s a whole horror movie marathon on! Remember watching all those old things? You should come watch!” Before she can say anything, her doorknob is turning. At the very least Remus has the decency to have his eyes covered as he opens the door, but he was seemingly too excited to talk through a door.

“Remus, I’m… very tired right now.”

“Huh? It’s only like 7!”

“Remus, please.” She holds up a hand, trying to pause him. “I… I can’t even get up right now, let alone get to the living room. I’d prefer to rest.”

“Oh.” Remus pauses, blinking behind his hand. “Well, I just know you used to love them a lot. I saw you lookin’ all sad and figured it might cheer you up?”

“Even if I do want to… I can’t get up, ok? I’m sorry, I know it’s annoying and inconvenient and whatever else, I’ve heard it before-“

“Why don’t I just carry you!”

Now that does pause her. “Remus, what?”

“Y’know, pick you up! Er, if you’re decent and all.”

“Yes, I’m decent.”

Remus immediately uncovers his eyes, still seemingly slightly disappointed as she says it. “I can carry you out here! You’re not heavy!”

“What, am I going to grow extra arms to hold on or something?” She can’t help laughing. She’s a grown woman only a few inches shorter than him – he can’t be serious.

He most definitely is, she realizes, as he steps over and begins putting his arms under her legs and back. She lets out a tiny yelp, and is up in the air before she knows it. Thank god the room is dark, because her entire face goes half dark half pink with flush. “Remus!”

Remus just cackles, and starts carrying her into the living room. The lights are also off out here, and she sees in the light of the TV screen that her cabinets have been scoured as there are packets of hot cocoa on the counter along with two mugs. Remus sets her on the pull-out bed with surprising gentleness, and she sees the beginning of the first Scream playing already. Remus goes to the kitchen and comes back with a cream yellow mug held out to her, steam glimmering in the TV light. She accepts it, still a bit breathless. Remus crawls over the bed, careful with his own mug of coffee – coffee, at 7 pm, she notes – and settles beside her. Their backs are pressed onto the backing cushions of the sofa.

She watches his face, glowing excitedly as he blows on his mug. He looks enraptured by a movie she knows he’s seen at least 6 times. It’s bizarrely cute to her, and she refocuses her gaze onto the movie, though not really watching. Was he always like this? She finds it hard to remember. She doesn’t remember being so… taken with him? She used to find him more of an annoying side-piece to the friendship with Virgil and Roman – a jester to their catty monarchy - though he was genuinely good to her and enjoyed being around her. She glances again at his brown eyes, seeming slightly red when lit up. He’s laughing through the first kill of the film, that high pitched cackle he’s always done. She supposes neither of them really knew what it was like to have people enjoy being around you before that little group.

She can’t help a light chuff of a laugh at herself, taking a drink of hot cocoa. What is she thinking about right now? It’s just Remus, that dumb kid from her high school. Any amount of loneliness on her part wouldn’t be a fair reason to tug at his heart, anyways.

Janus does enjoy the cocoa, and the movies – well, the three of them she makes it through. Remus made sure she was laughing and made as many inappropriate jokes as he could. He noticed her drifting to sleep as it got fully dark outside, and didn’t interrupt her, letting her fall to sleep. Her cocoa was fully drunk, and he lets her just… rest, for a while. He’s not an idiot, he did notice how exhausted she looked from the moment she opened the door. His eyes glance away from The Bride of Chucky onto her crutches. She didn’t have those in high school. Flitting back over to her face, Remus sighs out a low breath. Three years is longer than he thought, truly.

The molded apartment and impoverished conditions aren’t… new, for her, either. Virgil brought up to him once, during a panic attack, noticing Janus living in her car through most of the time they’d known her. Of course, himself and his brother were too rich and privileged to notice something like that. He glares at the television spitefully. If he had known, if she had ever mentioned it, if, if, if. Whatever. It’s unchangeable, and now he’s also cut off from that money and lifestyle. Turns out rich actors aren’t fond of ‘schizo’ sons. He shakes his head out from the thoughts as the marathon’s end title pops up, downs the last of his coffee, and then crawls off the bed. It doesn’t feel right to physically move her, so he sets the two blankets and pillow down on the kitchen floor and resolves to sleep there. Faces flit at him from the shadows of a new environment, but he's too at peace to feel distress.

“Heh, night Janus,” he whispers into the silent room. “Enjoy the bed.”

---

Apparently 9 pm on a Friday was the best Logan could manage, as their texts show, and Roman is chugging coffee just in case. Patton and Virgil will not stop being lovebirds in the living room, and Roman seethes over his mug at them from the chair across from the sofa.

“Geeze, Rom, if you glare any harder you might actually put holes in us,” Virgil chuckles, sitting up just slightly, laying against Patton’s chest and stomach. This only makes Roman glare harder at him, and Virgil rolls his eyes. “Roman, dude, it’s ok. We have the plan remember? Subtly clearing out once she gets here?”

“You could just go now!” Roman whines, very loudly.

Patton giggles at him. “Roman, c’mon, you know she thinks it’s a friendly hang out! She would be confused if it’s just you when she gets here.”

Roman groans, but he knows they’re right. It feels… icky? Just weird, to do to her, but if Patton thinks she’ll be ok with it, he trusts their advice. Roman takes a large drink of lukewarm coffee and pulls out his phone again. He is still in dress pants, his black gloves, and a slightly undone blouse despite Virgil and Patton having chosen to be in pyjamas. Casual elegance is always his expectation for himself, even when a cutie isn’t due over any minute. His phone has yet to show any signs of Logan getting any closer though.

Only a few minutes later, it seems Logan just doesn’t announce her arrival. Roman lets out a startled squeal as a knock comes on the door. He instinctively hides behind his hands for a moment, and Virgil laughs at him. He huffs and stands up to open it to her, coaxing his cheeks to lose their flush. He pulls the door open with a smile, and finds her standing calmly, dressed in a simple black polo shirt and jeans, the porch lights glinting off her piercings. Shockingly it’s the most casual he’s ever seen her, and he’s caught staring at her. The undone top button may as well be pornography as far as her usual attire is concerned.

She clears her throat. “Roman? Are you ok?”

He stands up straight, nodding. “Yeah- Yes! Yes, I’m fine. Why don’t you come in.” He bows to the side and gives her room to enter. She raises and eyebrow and smiles just slightly and his unnecessary grandiosity. Logan walks inside, already knowing where the living room is due to visiting Patton here once or twice. Roman trails behind her, brushing at his white streak of hair, tucking it behind his ear. He tries to watch her move without actually staring, her light and poised way of walking enrapturing him as always.     

“Hello Patton, hello Virgil,” she waves as she walks in, settling on one of the other free chairs that doesn’t have Roman’s cup on the table beside.

“I made coffee if you would like a cup? I even let it cool so I can put some ice in it!”

“That’s very kind, Roman, thank you.”

Roman smiles, proud of himself, and practically skips to the kitchen to get her a glass. Virgil turns his head to look at her, picking up the remote to turn off whatever gameshow was on previously. He switches to Netflix and smiles. “Going for the classic Doctor Who tonight, L? Or did you have anything new you wanted to check out?”

“I actually have not watched any of Doctor 12, my studies really picked up before I could get that far.”

“Actually shocking you haven’t seen Matt Smith yet,” Virgil teases. Logan raises her eyebrows at him with a playful smile. “Just saying, you’re a nerd for this show, I figured you would have seen literally everything it has to offer.”

“Eh, school has always been top priority, even if it means not doing much else.”

“Still, you should schedule in a free day, or something. Just like, a day for doing things for fun.”

Logan seems to consider it, touching her chin. “That is true, doing things for enjoyment is a necessary part of life – it’s just difficult to fit it in, what with work and school taking up almost every day I have.” She shrugs, closing her eyes with a sigh.

“You need something fun, Lo!” Patton calls, obviously already sleepy based on their voice. “Even if it’s a silly show or just going out to eat instead of… well, eating oatmeal for every meal.”

“I like oatmeal,” she retorts, sitting up slightly and crossing her arms.

“You like other things too, though!”

She sighs and nods, conceding. “You’re right, Patton. Other foods can be enjoyable.”

Virgil and Patton exchange a glance as Roman reenters the room. “Y’know, me and Pat are busy most of the week too, but Roman has pretty light courses – you two should go get dinner some time.”

“Oh! Why yes, Virge, that does sound lovely!” Roman hands her the cold caffeine and she smiles in thanks. Their hands touch slightly, and Roman rushes back to the other chair to try hiding the way his face darkens.

“Mm, very well. Getting food is an acceptable activity to lose time on, considering I would need to eat either way.”

“And I will be paying, of course!” Roman touches his chest as it puffs out proudly.

“Roman, I make my own money, I assure you I can-“

“Ugh, just let me do something nice for you!” he says, a bit too aggressively. Paton giggles at him and hides their face against Virgil. “You deserve someone to treat you, Logan.”

Logan sighs, not fully grasping the reason he wants to, but supposing that it won’t hurt. “Alright, Roman, if you insist. We can alternate who pays.”

Roman’s mouth shuts, and he tries not to look annoyed at Logan’s refusal to be spoiled. Patton and Virgil certainly never complain, considering his incredibly large allowance from his parents. Even with all the clothing he buys, it would still be difficult to spend $7,000 monthly without friends to support. He chooses to gripe in silence though, as Virgil turns on Doctor Who and the title theme sounds its sci-fi score through the room. Roman glances over at Logan again, pleased to see a relaxed grin on her lips as she drinks coffee.

They all relax through the first four episodes of the season, Logan occasionally asking for clarification on the emotional themes and Patton in return requesting clarification on the scientific themes. Roman makes occasional compliments to certain shot framing and lighting choices, and Virgil remains mostly silent.

After the end of the fourth episode, Virgil yawns exaggeratedly. “Well, L, I think me and Patton are going to head to bed, but since you don’t work until like 2 tomorrow, you and Roman should stay up and keep watching. If needed you can stay over, too, you know the couches rock.”

Logan smirks slightly. “Yes, the couches are quite comfortable. Very well, you two. Rest well, remember to brush your teeth.”

“If the couches are so nice, perhaps we should slide over onto that one now that they’ve cleared off!” Roman declares as the couple disappears down the hall to the bedrooms. Logan hums in agreement and they both move over. Their coffees are gone, and Roman finds himself with nothing to fidget with. He ends up picking at the leg of his pants and tapping his foot, barely able to pay attention to the show. How could he when she’s right there, breathing and shifting so close to him? He tries sneaking his hand closer to her own, trying to build tension. She doesn’t seem to notice, focused on the show.

Roman takes a breath, and fully slides his hand over to rest on top of hers. She immediately begins to pull it away, turning to glance at him. “Do you need something, Roman?”

“U-uh- Nothing, no! Your… hands… just look soft?”

She pauses, tilting her head at him. “Soft?”

Roman is screaming curses at himself in his head, but he tries to smile casually through it. “Y-yes! They look,” he picks one up gently, lightly running his gloved fingers over the back of her hand, “really smooth, and your fingers are very long and thin… They are quite dainty.”

“Um. Thank you, Roman.” Logan seems taken aback; her face confused. “Why do you bring it up?”

Roman meets her eyes, her light blue ones clear enough to hold his reflection, and a small sigh leaves him. “I don’t know. All of you has always looked quite soft to me. Truthfully… I think about it probably a bit too often.” He smiles bashfully, glancing down away from her eyes. “I think about you a bit too often.”

Logan tries to piece together what he’s talking about in her mind. Thinks about her? Her being soft? It’s not tracking with her – Roman thinking of her often doesn’t seem like a characteristic she would expect. “What do you mean by that, Roman?”

“I- I mean,” Roman glances up to her face again, something passionate and soft filling his features. “What I mean is that- is that I like you, Logan.”

“I like you too, Roman, you’re an excellent friend.”

“No! No, as- as more than that. I like you in ways beyond friendship.”

Logan blinks rapidly, mouth falling open slightly. “Oh- Goodness, Roman- I’m sorry, I- I don’t- I’m not exactly interested in romance. With anyone, not just you in particular.”

“Ah. Oh.” Roman chews at his lip awkwardly. Of course she wouldn’t be. It makes sense given how romantically illiterate she is. “I mean… we don’t necessarily have to be romantic?” he proposes.

“What do you mean?”

Roman licks his lips, sighing, trying to put his words in order. “What I mean is, while I do like you as more than a friend, that doesn’t necessarily mean we have to be romantic partners!”

“How so?”

“Well- There are other types of attraction! Like how I’m mostly homoromantic, but sexually I don’t have much preference at all!”

“So… you are implying we would only be sexual?”

“Er, well no! Not necessarily. Oh, goshdarnit, words can be hard. There’s more than just romance and sex too! Like, even though you are feminine in your gender and not my typical type, aesthetically I find you incredibly beautiful! And- and I picture you erotically or sensually quite often as well.”

It’s Logan’s turn to go pink, glancing away to process her thoughts. Before Roman mentioned experiencing these feelings, she hadn’t thought to consider him in that way at all. But she quickly glances him over again, his dark skin with light markings glowing in the television lights and his perfect, slightly long hair. His golden jewelry and greenish eyes, filled with hope and warmth as he looks at her. Perhaps she gets what he means by aesthetic beauty.

Logan breathes in slowly, and fully meets his gaze once again. “Well, Roman- I suppose- I mean, I understand your thoughts. You are also a very attractive person.” Doctor Who is nothing but background noise now, their gazes locked solely on each other. Roman is clinging to every word she speaks, holding her hand in his own trembling ones. “If it would make you happy, I would… be willing to attempt non-romantic partnership. I need to do further research on this whole subject of attraction, I think. There seems to be more to it than I realized.” Logan touches her chin. “What do you call a partnership like this? I don’t know, ‘non-romantic partner’ seems a mouth full.”

Roman tries to tamper down the joy for a moment to properly explain the topic to her - it’s rare he’s the one to teach Logan something. “Well, in queer spaces most of the time they call it a ‘queerplatonic’ or ‘queererotic’ relationship.”

“That is also a mouthful.”

“Hence why they shorten it! ‘QPR’, ‘QPP’- er, as in ‘queerplatonic partnership’.”

Logan hums, seeming to rotate the words over in her mind. “Very well. I suppose, then, that you are my queerplatonic partner.”

Roman grins at her widely, his slightly crooked teeth shining in the low light. She smiles back, a bit shocked with herself. Roman squeezes her hand, and chuckles. “Er, for boundary reasons- Am I allowed to kiss you?”

Logan can’t help a single sharp syllable of an embarrassed laugh slipping out of her, her face blushing deeper. “Sure, Roman, if it’s quick. I’m not very big on physical affection most times.”

Roman nods, and plants a quick respectful kiss on her cheek, giggling at himself. “This is so stupid- I’m being so awkward, I’m sorry!”

“It’s quite alright, I also feel awkward.”

“I can tell, nerd, your face is so bright it’s shining.”

Logan looks away, adjusting her glasses on her nose. “You don’t look much better, frankly.”

They meet eyes again, exchanging tiny smiles. “I suppose those dinner plans are a definite now, hm?”

“I suppose they are.”

“Want to finish watching this stupid nerd show?”

“Of course I do.”

“Can I cuddle you during it?”

“Of course you can.”         

Roman and Logan lay against each other, their bodies warm with embarrassment. Logan lets herself get so wrapped up that she does end up having to stay the night for time’s sake, and Roman leaves her to rest on the sofa for the night with one more quick, flushed kiss. Logan curls into the throw blanket and lets a geeky smile fully fill her face in the cover of darkness. She doesn’t know how she got here, with a careless, dramatic theatre major of all things. Logically they’ll be incompatible, right? She doesn’t know.

What Logan does know is that Roman’s confession felt right, in some way – like it was meant to happen. And the brief kisses certainly didn’t feel bad either. She falls asleep warmly, with no idea what the future might hold for the first time in years.            

[edupunkn00b]

Overruled, Ch. 5: Philosophy of Love Meets The Science of Attraction

Prev - The Philosophy of Love Meets the Science of Attraction - Next - Masterpost - [ AO3 ]

You got peanut butter Intrulogical in my chocolate Loceit. You got chocolate Dukeceit in my peanut butter Loceit. Oh, no wait, we've just discovered peanut butter cups Intruloceit. For Day 5 of @loceitweek, Philosophy/Science. Yes, this is still a Loceit story. :)

WC: 3237 - Rated T - cw: suggestive, alcohol, swearing, unhealthy coping mechanisms ---

“You have to check your calendar?” Janus blurted out, staring incredulously at him. “No, he’s free,” he said to Remus. “What time can he pick you up?”

“Janus, really, I—”

Janus cut him off with a look.

“You can pick me up at eight.” Remus’ voice wasn’t as confident as it had been a moment ago, and his eyes danced nervously between them even as he smiled. “My brother’ll be busy with some tech break down shit tomorrow night…” Warm fingers played at the edges of his hair, ostensibly clearing his vision. “We’ll have the place to ourselves.”

Logan tugged at the label on his water bottle and tried to catch Janus’ eye. He understood his reluctance, didn’t he? “I… I merely need to be certain I have not committed to anything else before I said yes,” he finally said to Remus.

“You haven’t,” Janus insisted and stood, offering a hand first to Remus and then to Logan. The finality of his answer echoed against the fitness room walls and suddenly Logan was a lot less warm.

Janus gripped his hand for a moment longer than necessary and Logan again tried to catch his gaze. Despite his smile, he steadfastly avoided his eyes. Finally, Logan nodded and turned to Remus, smiling. Bright green eyes stared back at his, their earlier nervousness burned away. “I’ll pick you up at eight, Remus,” he said. “Wear something casual.” Janus left with a little wave and Logan followed, calling back over his shoulder. “And warm.”

~

At eight o’clock sharp, Logan knocked at the door number Remus had text him, a picnic basket and plaid blanket tucked under one arm. 

“Hmm, don’t you look delectable,” Remus purred, looking him up and down. “Punctual, too.” He closer and trailed two fingers over the constellation pattern on his tie. “You smell tasty, too.”

“That is more than likely the fruit tray and sparkling cider,” he said, giving him a crooked grin.

“Sparkling cider? As in Martinelli’s or,” he made exaggerated air quotes.“‘Sparkling cider?’”

“It’s a berry apple blend, and yes,” Logan nodded. “It is nonalcoholic. You are under twenty-one, are you not?”

Remus waggled his eyebrows, hand resting on his chest. “Are you this exacting in bed?”

“That remains to be seen,” Logan said smoothly and offered his arm free arm. Remus was dressed in low-slung ripped jeans and newly polished combat boots, laces undone but not dragging on the floor. His sleeveless teelooked cropped, the edges curled and revealing his navel and a faint trail of auburn hair. “Do you have a jacket?” he asked, not at all convinced Remus had been listening when Logan had said to dress warmly .

“Got it,” he grinned, grabbing a heavy leather jacket from behind the door and draping it over one shoulder. He took Logan’s arm and followed him out to the hall and toward the elevators, letting his dorm door slam behind him. “So, where to, hot Daddy?”

“I am not a father,” he said, eyebrow raised. “‘Logan’ will suffice for tonight.”

“Yes, Sir,” Remus laughed, drawing closer as they stepped into the elevator.

Once outside, Logan set a brisk pace across the quad. “We are going there,” he pointed to the clock tower on top of the library.

“Oooo,” Remus cooed, tightening his grip on Logan’s arm with a little shiver. “Are we off for a ‘study’ session?” Head tilted to rest on his shoulder, they walked in tandem and he shivered again. “Care to study me?”

“In a manner of speaking,” Logan murmured. Dropping his arm, he unbuttoned his pea coat and threaded Remus’ hand between the back of it and his waist, his own arm draped around the sophomore’s. “You are cold. If you insist on not wearing your jacket, at least stay close.”

“Oh,” Remus began, voice sultry as he shimmied closer. With nothing but his linen shirt between them, Remus’ hand and arm felt cold. “Hmm…” Whatever he’d been about to say melted into a pleased hum. “You’re warm,” he finally said. “Thanks, Professor.”

Arm curled around his waist, Logan nodded as he felt the cold from Remus’ skin disipate with his body heat “You’re more than welcome, Remus.”

They approached the door and Remus frowned at the sign announcing the library closed at 7:30 on Sundays. “Are we breaking in?”

“Not quite,” Logan murmured, producing his school ID and tapping it against the reader. The door buzzed and popped right open. “The law library has extended hours. This will grant us… certain access.”

“Holy fuck, Logan!” he laughed, face blooming in a giddy grin. He bowed dramatically as Logan held the door for him and practically skipped inside the darkened library.

The warmth filling Logan’s chest had nothing to do with his wool pea coat or the blast from the library’s HVAC system. He gestured to a winding staircase to the left. “Ready for a bit of a climb?”

~

The library was glorious. It was near silent, none of that seemingly ever-present hum and buzz of machines and people doing their best to be quiet, no clacking keyboards or the random dropped book. Even the self-checkout machines near the door were powered down, only the red lasers flickering against empty tabletops.

Most of the lights were turned off, with only a strip of exit lights illuminating the aisles between the sections and stars and streetlights streaming in through the skylights over the reading room’s atrium. A series of lights lined the spiral stairs Logan led them up, and their legs cast long shadows across the main floor below.

Logan had let go of his hand as they walked, slowing his pace and waiting patiently while Remus peered over the railing at the darkened stacks below. “How do you not just come here all the time?” he whispered, his voice deafening in the silent space.

“Who says I don’t?” he smirked back, not in a whisper, but low and rumbly and delicious. Remus could listen to him talk all night. “It’s just a bit further, when you’re ready,” he murmured, gesturing to the top of the stairs and a bright green EXIT ONLY sign.

Taking the stairs two at a time, Remus followed him through the door, smiling at the bit of duct tape covering the latch. “Maybe you do come here often,” he said with a little shoulder dance.

“I like to be prepared,” he answered and let the door close slowly behind them. He gave it a tug to demonstrate to Remus they were not locked outside, then pointed to an open area just to the right of the clock tower. “Let’s spread the blanket there.”

He set down the basket and flipped open the blanket, one of those heavy flannel ones with the plastic cores to protect against the wet ground. Fuck, he really did like to be prepared. Remus eyed the picnic basket and wondered what else he’d prepared for.

“Please have a seat,” he murmured and they sat, looking out over the campus.

“Oh,” Remus breathed. They could see the entire campus from here, the bright yellow ginkgo trees lining the paths, the ornate street lamps dotting the edges and casting thin, warm light against the darkened buildings. To the West was the Sound, big barges looking magical in the dark, just floating lights reflecting off the water. To the South was Mount Rainier, her snowy top illuminated by the full moon.

His fingers itched, wishing he had brought his sketch pad and charcoals. He glanced at Logan, busily organizing two glasses and a platter of strawberries, grapes, and pineapple in front of them. He pulled out the promised bottle—chilled, no less—of Martinelli’s and—

“I noticed how you’d been drawing at the fitness center,” Logan said, passing him a blank sketchbook and a small box of charcoals. The exact fucking brand he’d used before their sexy little law school smack down. “I’ve always enjoyed the view here and I thought perhaps…”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Remus grinned, reaching for the sketchbook and pastels. They were brand new, still wrapped in the plastic film. “Thank… thank you, Logan. D—do you really not mind if I…” He gestured to the sketchbook and the water in front of them. He knew this was a date, right?

Smiling, Logan moved closer to him and draped his jacket over his shoulders, then handed him a glass. “I was rather hoping you would.”

~~~

As the evening wore on, the pair finished their drinks and most of the platter. Remus sketched quickly, filling page after page. He and Ro had made it out to Seattle just before the start of freshman year and he’d never… never seen the sky quite like this. Most nights were cloudy and even he hadn’t yet dared to climb up to the clock tower just for a look around.

He turned to a fresh page again and shifted, keeping the very southern tip of the Sound in his field of vision along with the mountains. Logan moved behind him and, as he drew, Remus leaned back, resting against his chest. A gust of wind whipped at his hair and Remus blew up sharply, hands busy with the pastels.

Humming quietly, more a rumble against his back than anything Remus could hear, Logan tucked his hair back behind his ear. The warmth from his hand sent a little shiver down his back and Remus tore his eyes away from Mt. Rainier and grinned up at him. “Thank you,” he whispered. 

“My pleasure.” Logan smiled and Remus shivered again. Moonlight sparkled in his eyes and, before he really thought about it, Remus turned to a fresh page and started sketching him.  

“The mountain is back there,” he murmured, tilting his chin toward Rainier. Logan sat with one knee bent and Remus settled between his legs, leaning against him as he sketched a close-up of his face.

Remus grinned. “The view from here is even better.” He started with broad strokes, then tentatively reached for Logan’s jaw. “May I?” he asked, surprising even himself.

“Of course.”

He adjusted the angle of Logan’s chin and nodded rapidly. “Hold just there for a moment,” he muttered before returning to his work.

When he finished the sketch, he closed the book. “No peeking,” he laughed. “I’ll show you after I’ve colored it.”

Logan laughed back, a low chuckle that sent vibrations up and down Remus body. He was practically seated in his lap, with his own legs draped over one of Logan’s. Leaning in, he traced the edge of Logan’s jaw. It was just as smooth and firm under his fingertips as he’d imagined it. “I’ve got lots of things you can peek at in the meantime.”

“Is that so?” he asked, wrapping his arms around him and drawing closer. One more inch and their lips would touch.

“Please kiss me,” Remus blurted out.

“My pleasure,” he murmured and finally—fucking finally—pulled him into a kiss.

Logan’s kiss started gently, tasting his lips as one hand moved up to cradle the back of his head. Fingers gently curling through his hair, he slowly deepened their kiss. 

Remus hummed into his mouth, lips parted, and pushed against him, following him as he lay back onto the blanket. When he broke away for breath, Remus mouthed along his jaw and down his neck before sitting up, straddling his hips. 

“How do you like it?” he asked, dragging his hands down Logan’s chest and playing at the top of his belt buckle. 

“Remus,” Logan shook his head, just a little, then pulled Remus’ hands from his belt and brought them up to his lips. He kissed his knuckles and shook his head again. “Remus, I’m not going to fuck you on a rooftop.”

“Oh!” he said, climbing off. Logan sat up immediately. His face was tricky to read in the dark. But they way Remus had been sitting had made it easy to feel just how interested Logan was. “Why didn’t you just say so? There are…” He waggled his eyebrows and licked his lips. “Other things I can do or we could go back to your place…”

Logan knelt in front of him and cradled his face with both hands. Steel blue eyes stared right into him, thumbs brushing over his cheekbones. “It is quite late,” he said after a long moment. “Perhaps it’s time I walked you home.”

~

“I had a wonderful time with you tonight,” Logan murmured at his door. He brushed back the curls from his eyes and then his hand lingered, carding gently through his hair.

Remus turned and rubbed his cheek against Logan’s palm, then nipped lightly at the fleshy part of his thumb. “No need for our wonderful night to already end.” He looked over his shoulder at the empty dorm room. “My brother won’t be home tonight. He’s crashing with the rest of the tech crew. Stepping forward, he pressed close, close enough to know what Logan’s body wanted. He looped one arm around Logan’s back, then took a small step backwards. “We have the room all to ourselves.”

His cheeks and lips were flushed a deep pink and, even under the bright hallway lights, Logan’s pupils were big and black, a copy of the night sky they’d just seen. He swallowed hard, then pulled Remus’ hand away from his back and pressed a soft kiss against his knuckles. “I’d like to take you out again sometime,” he said and Remus’ stomach sank to the floor.

He opened his mouth, but he didn’t know what to say. If he didn’t want him, then…

“May I call you tomorrow and we can make plans?” Logan continued in that same low, smooth voice.

“Yeah,” Remus finally managed, heart twisting in his chest. Everything had been going so well. What did he do wrong to get this whole ‘I’ll call you’ bullshit? “Yeah, of course,” he grinned, giving his shoulders a little shimmy. Ro wasn’t the only actor between them.

“Sleep well, Remus,” Logan said, cupping his cheek as he kissed him again, soft and sweet.

It felt like a send-off.

“Yeah, you, too, Logan,” he said and watched him head for the stairs, escaping his view as quickly as he could.

Remus closed the door behind him and sank down onto the beanbag chairs to figure out what the fuck had gone wrong.

An hour later, Remus was no closer to figuring out how he’d fucked everything up and he’d taken to pacing the tiny room in an effort to work it out. Why didn’t he want him? He’d made it really obvious he was ready, willing, and able, and Logan was clearly into it. Had he just revved him up to go be with someone he really wanted?

The scars on his arm itched like a motherfucker and Remus knew if he spent another minute in here alone, he was not going to be able to keep his promise to Ro. He needed some air. While he'd paced, he’d thrown his jacket on the floor. He tooped to pick it up on his way to the door, but then straightened, hand empty.

Fuck it. It’s not that cold out.

He’d thrown out all his clove cigarettes after that fucking party, part of another promise to Ro to try harder. But he didn’t toss his gum, so he shoved his last two pieces in his mouth and chomped hard, then opened the door and fled from his thoughts. 

~

Janus sat in his armchair, half-empty glass of scotch on the table next to him. The room was dark, the diffuse light spilling in from the streetlamp across the road doing little to illuminate the space. The sun had still been shining when Janus had come home from the grocery store and he’d taken out the bottle Glenlivet and shoved the rest of the bag into the fridge to deal with later. He sat down in the living room and poured his first glass.

That was a half a bottle ago.

‘I merely need to be certain I have not committed to anything else before I said yes…’

Logan’s eyes had pleaded with him, explaining with a look what he couldn’t—wouldn’t—with words in front of Remus. Janus knew what he’d been trying to say.

‘You have not.’

What else could he say? What else should he have said? He’d literally told Logan to find someone else to pursue. He’d told him he wasn’t interested in a relationship, he’d told him he didn’t love people. He’d told him he didn’t want to love anyone, that he didn’t want more of that soft warm touch, of those kind eyes looking back at him. That he didn’t want to know more, to learn if his kisses tasted as good as he smelled and to discover what it meant for his heart to leap out of its chest each time Logan smiled.

He’d lied.

Janus tipped back his glass and discovered it was, in fact, completely empty. Fumbling with the bottle cap, he set down the glass and tried again. Just before he got it, the bottle leapt from his hands and hit the hardwood floor, shattering and soaking the area rug with the last of his scotch. Fuck.

It took him far too long to clean it all up and by the time he was done, Janus was more than ready for another glass. He looked up at the microwave clock. If he left now, he could make it to Safeway before they closed.

The only open grocery story was only a block from campus, but the fresh air made the hike shorter than it usually felt. Before long, he was sauntering inside, walking carefully to ensure they wouldn’t turn him away. The cashier hadn’t even looked up to ring him out.

Moments later he strode through the doors, bottle in hand—and right into Remus.

“Oh, fuck, Janus, sorry,” he muttered, grabbing him with those strong, callused hands before he could stumble. Remus had been drawing, charcoal dust under his fingernails and a bit by his jaw.

“No ‘pologies needed,” Janus said slowly, annoyed at the slight slurring in his words. Remus didn’t release him and Janus stared back. He was dressed in a sleeveless shirt and jeans, no jacket. Before Janus could form the words to ask if he was cold, he shivered.

“What are you doing out?” He clutched his bottle to his chest, head tilted to the side. “I thought you’d still be with Logan by now.”

Drunk, standing in the middle of a poorly lit street, Janus couldn’t miss the hurt in Remus’ eyes. He shrugged but didn’t explain.

Janus couldn’t believe what he was seeing. How could Logan have possibly rejected him? He reached out and tapped the edge of Remus’ jaw. “You know what?”

“What?” he huffed out a little laugh, leaning in to his touch like a lost puppy. 

“You look like you could use a drink. And I know I sure as hell could use one,” Janus nodded, holding up the bagged bottle. “I live twenty blocks that way,” he said, pointing with one end and offering his arm. “Would you like to join me tonight?”

Remus stared down at the bottle, then lifted his eyes and met Janus’. A shaky smile pulled up one corner of his mouth and hooked his hand into the crook of Janus’ elbow. “Lead the way.”

[katelynn-a-fan]

Somewhere Over the Rainbow: Chapter 9

First | Previous | Next | Masterlist | Ao3

Summary: Patton is dealing with some stuff and it's... not going well.

Word count: 3k (2953)

Warnings: Self-deprecation, slight Remus-style imagery

Patton's heart was tearing in two separate halves. Unlike when he found Thomas for the first time on his doorstep, the destruction wasn’t immediate, instead, it was excruciating and painfully drawn out as Patton listened desperately to the sounds coming from Thomas’s room for anything other than the beeping that had started this whole thing.

Not getting any closer to the door despite his attempts, Patton had a sneaking suspicion past the sharp pain in his heart that something was holding his body back. Judging by the fact he had been trying to get back in for a number of minutes by then, it was quite likely.

But even as Patton was aware of it, it didn’t mean that Patton could tear his focus away from that beeping.

He just wanted everything to go right, but everything had just gone oh so wrong.

-

Beep!

Roman jumped in Patton’s tender embrace, as did Patton himself. Unfortunately, that meant that Roman’s head knocked directly into Patton’s chin, but the dull ache of pain barely registered over the warmth that had flooded into Patton during their embrace.

Patton’s eyes turned to Thomas, his hand still flush in his. One of the monitors had to be the cause of the noise, but there were more of them than Patton had an idea of what they did, which made Patton’s mouth run dry. After searching the more unfamiliar machine, the familiar image of the heartbeat monitor caught Patton’s eye.

The beep continued as Patton’s eyes found the monitor and Patton’s blood ran cold. His fingers twitched in the folds of Roman’s dress, his eyes widening as he continued to stare at the monitor.

The heart monitor’s…. not supposed to have a line, it’s supposed to be zig zaggy… right? Surely- ha... surely that’s a mistake. Right?

Under Patton’s embrace, Roman’s body stiffened and began to shake.

“Patton… the… Thomas’s- heart monitor.” Patton’s hands twitched in Roman’s dress yet again. Tears came to his eyes when he slowly shook his head. 

Patton’s arms held Roman back when Roman began to get up. The grip rooted Roman in place, a prison made of Patton’s arms around him.

“Patton, he-” 

Squeezing Roman tight, Patton shook his head again. He purposefully ignored the strangled note of protest from under him, looking everywhere but at the monitor like that would change it.

It wasn’t until the sound of shoes squeaking slightly on the linoleum met Patton that he dared glance at the monitor again to prove it was real. The flat line was unmistakable, no denying it when it was right in front of both of them. Patton’s hand squeezed Thomas’s hand tight.

His mind still warring about what to do, he barely flinched when the door to Thomas’s hospital room burst open. A nurse Patton was not familiar with burst into the room first. The nurse jumped immediately to Thomas’s side.

Patton could swear the nurse said something, but it was virtually indecipherable over the roaring beep that drilled into his ears.

What did get to his muffled brain was the vibrations Roman’s voice made against his chest and through Patton’s ear where he was obliviously resting it on Roman’s head just moments before. 

No.

He couldn’t pay attention to them, Thomas was… he was….

Not on my watch.

Patton finally let go of Roman’s back. His still intertwined fingers in Thomas’s leading him along directly to Thomas’s bedside. Hands trembling, Patton gripped Thomas’s hand tight thoughtlessly babbling to Thomas.

“Come on Thomas wake up. Show them you’re okay. You’ve… got to be okay…”

Clinging to Thomas’s hand like a lifeline, Patton immediately recoiled when a set of hands alighted on him. A thoughtless cry came from his lips as he threw off the hands. He couldn’t leave Thomas. Thomas needed him, Patton was sure of it.

With his hands wrapped around Thomas’s hands, the distinct sensation of Thomas’s wrist growing cold where Patton ran his fingers over it slowly grew.

“No, no, no, no!”

Another set of stronger hands grabbed him, and this time they were too strong, A different set of hands ripped Thomas’s hand out of Patton’s grip, judging by the other set still gripping him. The cry before was nothing compared to the unholy shriek that came from his mouth as he was pulled from the room. 

But still, all Patton could focus on was Thomas. How Thomas was getting further away., how Thomas needed him.

He couldn’t budge the arms around him, though, no matter how much he squirmed and writhed and protested. The arms didn’t let go.

Quickly, the desperation of getting back into the room clouded Patton’s mind, his eyes nearly glazed over as the only thing Patton could think about was Thomas and how he….

How he...

No, he’s not dying! He’s not dying! I won't allow it.

-

Why? Why is everything just going wrong? Can I do anything right?

The pain in Patton’s heart still remained, even growing stronger the more Patton resisted against them and could’t get into the room. 

“Stop- you- please-”

Patton caught only small snatches of what was being said… or maybe shouted at him. But he couldn’t just stop when the ache in his chest demanded he continue. By now, he wasn’t going for anything painful, he didn’t want to cause anyone else unnecessary pain, but the pain in his own heart nearly had him doing it.

Opening his mouth after a particularly painful wave of heartbreak, Patton let out a heartbroken wail. He strangely wasn’t able to hear himself much, his own cry muffled.

After a few moments, the sounds of footsteps approaching distantly filtered into his awareness. The sound was nothing Patton turned to look at, so it was nothing. 

A set of two voices joined the footsteps, one of them maybe calling out Patton’s name, but that didn’t matter. 

It didn’t matter when another set of arms pressed on his shoulders, not the squeeze, not the words and the set of eyes in front of him that were oddly familiar.

What did finally get Patton’s attention was how the set of eyes turned to the room and actually ran into the room. Patton trusted those eyes. Those eyes would take care of Thomas. They would… take care of… Thomas.

Patton’s struggling stuttered as those eyes ran into the room, the concept that the eyes he trusted were going into the room to help Thomas finally snapped him out of his frenzied stupor.

It was then that all the sound finally cut back in and a voice that was most definitely Roman’s slammed into his ears, making him cringe. The voice was right in his ear and it was overwhelming when the sound came all at once. Roman had been the one holding him, that made sense to Patton as the memories that had never truly left settled back into Patton’s awareness.

After fighting off Roman for so long, Patton’s mind began to finally wind down enough to let his body start to slow down in it’s fighting. Patton’s vision slowly expanded from the ever tightening tunnel that he wasn’t even acutely aware of until it was expanding again.

Blinking heavily, Patton rose his hands slowly to come up to grasp Roman’s arm. At the actions, Roman’s arms squeezed around Patton a little tighter, as if Patton was about to try to dart into the room again. 

“Ro-” Patton coughed, his throat suddenly full of shooting pain like he had slowed a set of razor blades. “Roman… I’m… okay now.”

Patton’s world blurring, he was abruptly facing Roman as Roman’s hands had directed him. Another round of heavy blinks ensued as Patton recovered from the move. When his vision did coalesce, Roman’s face was then only inches from his own. He leaned back a little with his lips parting slightly open, but the movement wasn't’ enough to unbalance either of them.

“Woah, hey, don’t try to speak too much. I don’t know if you were aware of what you were doing, but you were screaming your lungs out for a long while there.” Hands gently squeezing Patton shoulder’s, Roman’s face was neutral except for the crease in his brow and the utter concern reflected in his eyes as they made eye contact with one another.

The outside of his neck area hurting less than the inside of his throat, he nodded stiffly. He parted his lips to start to whisper, but a passing thought hit him.

Isn’t whispering worse than talking for your voice when it’s almost gone? I think I heard that somewhere? I better not speak then…

Roman continued on anyways, changing their embrace into a proper hug. Guiding Patton’s face into his shoulder somewhat uncomfortably, Roman’s voice turned soothing

“It’s alright. It’s going to be alright. Remus is in there now, and he’ll help patch up Thomas good okay?” Roman squeezed Patton gently.

Staring at the wall behind Roman, Patton took a moment to process that.

Remus was in Thomas’s room now according to Roman. When had he gotten in there? He-

The eyes. It was his eyes. That’s why I thought Thomas was in good hands. That- Remus would take care of Thomas. I’m so glad Remus was here… I… don’t know what would’ve 

Tears were falling from his cheeks before Patton was aware he was beginning to shake with silent sobs that shook both of them.

God… oh god please let Thomas be okay. He has to be okay, please! 

His legs were slowly crumpling underneath him as his cries raged on. Roman’s arms gently helped him safely to the floor, his knees barely insulated on the cold hard linoleum by his pajama pants. All the while, Patton desperately clung to Roman as if the moment he let go, Roman would disappear. It was a stupid fear, but Patton couldn’t argue with his feelings much right now, so he let himself hang on Roman instead.

Now that his blind panic had subsided, the pain in his chest was much more noticeable, but much less painful than before. 

Right, then, Roman’s hands twitched on his back much like his had not moments earlier. 

Against his better impulse, Patton drew back from Roman to search his eyes.

“Roman what-?”

At the same moment Patton watched Roman’s eyes train on something behind him and flicker to him, a familiar voice grumbled behind him.

“Fucking...bitch...hours…ullshit…”

Remus’s voice, it was Remus’s voice…

A new set of tears blooming in his eyes, Patton immediately scrambled up to his feet and turned around as Roman began to say something. But if he finished the sentence, Patton had no clue as his focus once again zeroed in on the door to Thomas’s room. There indeed was Remus standing in the doorway, looking nearly as bad as he was when Patton first saw him when he collapsed in the hospital lobby. He wasn’t in the room, helping them revive Thomas. He wasn’t…

Patton’s eyes widened as it hit him, the downcast expression on Remus’s face, that fact he, a nurse, wasn’t needed in a time of crisis…

A cry to rival the one he barely remembered making just before Remus bolted into the room was ripped from his lips as his knees began to buckle once more. His only saving grace was when Remus rushed forward and caught halfway to the ground.

Remus’s arms struggled only for a moment as he clung onto Patton, his words only audible because they were suddenly so close to his ear. 

“Patton? It’s okay, or it’ll be okay! Wait… do you…? Hey, hey!” Remus’s words sped up as he gently cupped Patton’s cheek with one hand, forcing Patton to look into Remus’s eyes.

“Patton, please calm down. Do you think I’m not there because-” Remus visibly gulped as he took a step towards the wall Roman had brought him close, his hand still gently skirting across Patton’s face. “Patton listen to me. I’m not in there because it’s literally illegal for me to work any more until my next shift unless there’s a large emergency or something. They’re still trying to figure it out, but Thomas is going to be okay, I promise. If I can help it, this boy is going to live until he’s our age. You hear me Patton? Please… Please calm down…”

The world came to a stand still as Remus’s words bounced his skull. What had been a reality and a devastating one at that now became a distant possibility down the line. Thomas wasn’t dead.

He isn’t dead.

Even with the devastation slowly ebbing away, Patton’s legs still failed him, bringing him helplessly to the ground once again. This time, though, Remus didn’t let him sit there while he sobbed. 

Suddenly, he was being swept up into the air by a set of strong arms that belonged to Remus. The gesture gave Patton’s stomach a butterfly feeling, and Patton’s eyes lingered a little longer than they should’ve on the rippling of the muscles as they subtly shifted him as Remus carried him down the hallway a little.

Wrapping his arms tightly around Remus’s neck, Patton pressed his face to Remus’s shoulder. Through Remus's shoulder, Remus’s voice traveled muffled through it into his ear much like it had with Roman whether Patton wanted it to or not. There was a fleeting moment of clarity in Patton’s fluttering eyes before his eyes went glassy all over again. 

Eyes quickly drifting closed, Patton held onto Remus for dear life. Hands came up to lightly grab him and pull him down and away from Remus, but they didn’t understand. He had to hold onto Remus. Remus was safe, and he couldn’t let go.

Remus would make things okay. He just had to keep holding onto Remus and everything would work out.

It didn’t matter that Patton was hardly aware of the sensation in his body, a sense of heaviness and utter numbness overcome his limbs. All that mattered was Patton’s heart was dragging everything down and Remus was holding Patton up from following it. 

Words were being spoken around him, but like when Patton had been trying to get back into Thomas’s room, they held little meaning.

The only thing Patton was concerned about were two things, Thomas and holding onto Remus. If something else was happening, it didn’t matter. 

Time held no meaning to Patton as he held tightly to him, it could’ve been seconds or hours as Patton refused to let go. Every time a set of hands grabbed at his back, he immediately bucked them off, clinging tighter to the one person who could fix this. 

As long as he was holding onto Remus, he would be okay. He couldn’t let go. 

No.

No!

He couldn’t just let Remus go!

It took awhile for the hands to stop pulling on him and instead softly cradle him. Not that he gained anything from being held. But it did… feel good in some distant way.

His body was still there, but his senses had completely numbed to the point where the outside world was still more than an afterthought to him now.

He’s dead. Thomas is dead. Why is this happening? He has to be dead. Why else would everything be so upside down and turned around?

If not for the numbness, Patton would have surely begun to sob at that thought, but instead, he simply sat there, barely aware of his face still pressed into Remus’s nurse uniform. Slowly, he began to run his fingers across Remus’s uniform, a steady hum passing through his body like Remus was speaking.

It was… nice….

Oh… Remus was speaking a lot, like… a lot.

Now he was shaking, was… was he shaking, or was he shaking Patton? 

Oh… 

A low voice hit Patton’s ears from nearby, the feeling of the low sound registering rather than the full sound of the words spoken. It was no one he had met, it was someone else?

A stranger? No, no! Patton trembled, curling tighter into Remus.

No, go away. No strangers, I just need Remus and my partners. No no no no no.

“-tton!”

Jumping in Remus arms, Patton clung tightly to Remus as sound forcely came back proper into Patton’s ears. Patton’s hand came up to cover his ears, but Remus’s familiar hands gently caught his hands.

“No, Patton. There is someone, multiple someones, actually, that need to speak with you right now. I’m sorry for distressing you if I have or whatever happened, but you need to be here for this.”

A frown teased Patton’s lips, his eyes lifting up to Remus’s wide, soft eyes..

Someone else? Stranger? No, no strangers! Strangers don’t matter right now! Thomas is- Thomas-

Shaking his head Patton attempted to press his head back into Remus’s chest. Brand new tears sprung to his eyes, but as Remus placed his arms so that Patton was lightly pressing into his arms, causing the new tears to fall down Patton’s cheeks instead of soaking into the front of Remus’s uniform.

“N- no…” Patton’s voice grated out, barely above a whisper. However, that was all Patton apparently had to do to get Remus to smile.

Why? Why is he smiling? There’s nothing to smile about- I-

A sob bubbled in Patton’s chest, his body convulsing as he prepared to let it out. Before that could happen, Remus cupped Patton’s face directly, making eye contact with Patton for a moment before turning Patton 90 degrees to his right.

Eyes training downwards immediately, it took a few moments longer than it should have to take in the pair of black boots standing only a few feet away that most definitely did not belong to any of his partners.

[shsl-fander]

Abandoned-Dukeceit

Old drabble from AUGUST 2022. DAMN. So sorry if its shitty

Pairing: Dukeceit/Demus,Remus x Janus

Tw: Mentions of abandonment, possible virgil neg along with janus neg, arguing, yelling

@spacedouterri

"What is wrong with you?!" Virgil fumed, stumbling backwards in disbelief, "You guys don't actually care about Thomas! All you want to do is manipulate him, just like you did to me!"he argued. "I can't believe I believed you! You just don't want me to permanently stay with them, do you?" he snapped, narrowing his eyes towards Janus.

"Well I'm done, Janus. I'm done with Remus too, both of you," Virgil scoffed,"Have fun together I guess," and with that he was gone.

Gone. God, Janus knew how much Virgil meant to Remus. He loved Remus so much, how was he supposed to tell him?! Virgil was like a son to them.

Janus sighed, running his fingers through his hair in exasperation. He slammed his head against the table, groaning as his thoughts spiralled. How could he do this?! He knew this was hard for himself, but now its hard on his boyfriend too, and the kid he considered a son or a best friend just stormed off. 

He could always lie to Remus about it for his protection, but he'd find out eventually. Plus wasn't that literally what Virgil was mad at him for?

Though before Janus could finish his thoughts; Remus jolted into the room, rushing around eagerly unable to stand still. He bounced excitedly, gazing around mace swinging in one hand, "Heya Janny!" he exclaims, causing Janus to jump up from his current position. He cackled happily, "Where's Virgil? Come on! We should all go out to my version of the imagination!" he offers, slipping himself closer to Janus,"like usual!" he chirps as an addition.

Janus kept his gaze focussed towards the ground, stammering and stumbling over his words, "Ahh Remus buddy Virgil he-" he swallowed, he couldn't say this without a lie, lies slipped so much easier, they were natural for him as Deceit. "He's here. He's never leaving." Janus opened his mouth to speak more yet he couldn't speak over the lump in his throat."I-I'm sorry love, " he choked,"I'm not a mess."

Tears welled up under Janus's eyes, he frantically wiped them. He didn't cry. Ever.

Remus froze, the cheerful expression on his quickly faded dropping to more sorrow. "Oh," was all he could muster to say, voice so uncharacteristically soft. "Jan-" he started, stepping closer to the deceitful trait, "ya okay?"

The two sat in silence before Janus just burried his head into Remus's shoulder, "Stay with me tonight? Please?"

"You'd have to kill me to get me to leave, of course."

[aollosjustlurking]

intro

i decided i should make one of these

i'm apollo, he/they. i am also a minor so don't be weird. i go through periods of being very active on tumblr and then not being active at all for months, so if you want consistency i am not your guy.

some quick warnings for my page before the fun stuff:

i do swear

i might reblog or post nsfw or agnst or stuff like that

i will always tag and put TWs for this stuff though! you will never be surprised with this kind of thing on my blog! there will always be warning!

i've been a fander since 2017. virgil has always been my favorite, but i love them all so much.

ships that i like

prinxiety: my otp. i'm sorry but i love it so much.

anxceit: not really as endgame, but like come one those two have a history

roceit: again, i don't think realistically they would work. but when you combine a history of anxceit, then roceit, and eventual prinxiety ... the draaama

logicality: sweet. what's not to love?

dukeceit: i feel like they get each other. i like it.

moceit: i get it is all i'm saying

intruality: again, i get it. moceit and intruality are two that i don't mind seeing but i don't particularly look for y'know?

analogical: i really get it. i often don't partake because i just love prinxiety so much but if you ship this you are absolutely right. no notes.

ones i'm not a fan of:

logince: look i get it. i totally do. just not for me personally.

royality: platonically? great! just don't see it romantically personally

moxiety: again, platonically? amazing! romantically? not for me.

r*mr*m: i am not just "not a fan" of this, i hate it. it is so gross and bad and please never show me this.

music:

taylor swift: i'm a new swiftie! my top three albums are reputation, lover, and speak now. i mostly post content about sander sides and taylor swift combined

mcr: i am a new fan i'll admit, i don't claim to be an expert. it's great music tho.

will wood: love that funky music what can i say? the normal album is my favorite but i like them all.

olivia rodrigo: sour changed me as a person.

the beatles: this one is courtesy of my mother.

i'm also in to marauder's era harry potter. i'll be honest, i typically hyper-fixate on sander sides then harry potter as like a cycle of the two. so i may post. that content but rn i'm really into sander sides again

dni - typical things

homophobes

transphobes

racists

sexists

terfs

just don't suck y'know?

if you want to dm me you can. i might not respond immediately and i might be dry, it's not you it's me i promise.

if you see any cool sander sides or taylor swift stuff send it my way ig. I hope you enjoy my blog!

[emoprincey]

analogince and intrualiceit for the ship ask game?

Analogince - ship it

1. What made you ship it?

I really love the dynamics between Virgil, Roman and Logan, and I think they'd be so sweet together!!

Also, I really like LAMP in theory but I'm not a big fan of Patton ships, so I tend to prefer just these 3 together.

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

So many things..... but I think I really like the fact that they're all such nerds!! That's true for all of Sanders Sides characters lol, but I think these three are nerds in a way that means they can specifically relate to each other. Roman and Virgil both really love Disney!! Logan and Virgil i think would be the types to enjoy their interests quietly (unless debating with Roman), and Roman and Logan are both very passionate about the things they like, as well as having a shared interest in poetry. So, yeah, I rllly like the idea of these 3 talking abt their interests and debating together, or just quietly cuddling during a movie night :)

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Not really an unpopular opinion, but I've seen the headcanon around that these three write poetry for each other and I've decided to adopt that, 10/10 very cute XD

Intrualiceit - don't ship it

1. Why don't you ship it?

This one was genuinely hard because I feel like I'm being pulled in both directions. I love dukeceit and moceit, and there are some aspects of intrualiceit that I really like, but overall I just don't really vibe with it. Ig it just doesn't interest me as a ship.

2. What would have made you like it?

I think I'd be interested in their dynamic if Janus was dating both Patton and Remus, but those two aren't dating each other. I've mentioned before that intruality doesn't really interest me, but I'd be really interested in exploring Patton and Remus' platonic dynamic in that situation, with them trying to get along for Janus' sake then eventually coming to understand each other more and mayhaps they fall in love along the way.

3. Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?

I really like the idea of Patton x two people whose existence goes against everything he's been taught about morality, so he ends up changing his perspective. I think spending more time with Janus and Remus would genuinely help Patton grow as a person, and I think they'd help him relax a bit, which he really needs atm.

[fangirlwriting-stories]

Thanks for tagging me!

When did you post your first ever fanfic?

On Wattpad back in 2013 when I was like 12 years old. No you can't find it I took it down in shame. And also to avoid the Wattpad people stealing it. Yes it's terrible 12 year old fanfiction but it's my terrible 12 year old fanfiction y'know? They can't have it.

First character you wrote for:

Pinke Pie from My Little Pony Friendship is Magic. Yes that was the first story I posted too. No you still can't see.

Main character(s) you’re currently writing for:

Danny for that Danny Phantom AU, Roman and Remus for Before I Go, Phineas and Ferb in that longfic I'm chipping away at, a whole bunch of characters for a soulmate AU for the Arcane anniversary, a couple original characters for original stories. What can I say, I contain multitudes.

Character(s) you haven’t written about before but plan on writing about soon:

Dan (that's what the fandom calls the Danny from Ultimate Enemy right?) and Jazz for a little character study because I want to put these two under a microscope so bad I swear. How does Dan feel about his sister because let me tell you it is not simple I've seen them intereact I know it's not I want to know what the hell these two have going on— anyway.

Fandom(s) you’re currently writing for:

I listed pretty much all of them earlier lol but Sanders Sides, Phineas and Ferb, Danny Phantom, Arcane, and the fandom I've made up in my head for all my original ideas.

Platonic pairing(s) you currently write for:

I am always always always feral about brotherly dukexiety I feel like y'all know that by now. Working on some creativitwins stuff too and some Danny and Jazz stuff and Phineas and Ferb and Candace— y'know what it's siblings guys. They make me go feral it's sibling dynamics.

Romantic pairing(s) you currently write for: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

...Does Phineas and Isabella in that one unrequited love fic I'm working on count?

No no you know what I'm writing Dukeceit in Before I Go and that actually counts just ignore the fact that they're chaos best friends first I'm so good at this guys I'm basically alloromantic isn't romance the best

Your top 3 tags on AO3 (if you post your works on AO3): I'm not sure if there's an official well to tell, sorry about that, but if I'm just taking a shot in the dark, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, and X Character Needs A Hug (Just fill in X with any character and I've probably done it xD)

Your current platform where you post your works: AO3 and here on tumblr! Have a link to AO3!

Snippet of a wip you’re currently working on:

Have a snippet from the Arcane Soulmates AU! I'm having a lot of fun with this one, I'm trying to like, actually think about how soulmates would affect this world and the story presented and it's turning into one of those "everything is different except for the ways that literally nothing is different" situations:

It had been confusing to all of them for a while.  Caitlyn’s parents’ names were both listed in full, it’s how they’d found each other.  Caitlyn imagined “Caitlyn Kiramman” would be on her soulmates wrist just like normal.  But “Violet” had been the only thing on her wrist since birth.  And eventually, with no other possibilities, Caitlyn had begun to consider the idea that her soulmate didn’t have a last name.

Her parents had been strongly against the idea at first, because that pointed to something that, to them at least, was very distasteful— that Caitlyn’s soulmate was from the undercity.

No Pressure! @mishiitake-mushrooms, @pulchrasilva, and @prince-rowan-of-the-forest

❦ ➷ get to know your fellow fanfic writers better ༊ ✧.*

I had fun doing this! ♡

when did you post your first ever fanfic?

January 2017, I think. wow, it’s been 6 years! (no, I’m not giving you my Wattpad username)

first character you wrote for:

Joker. it was during my Wattpad era. I have zero regret, but I’m not giving the link lol

main character(s) you’re currently writing for:

Daniel Harrow & Henry Creel (as in separate fics that aren’t crossover, but wouldn’t it be nice if I wrote a crossover with these two…)

character(s) you haven’t written about before but plan on writing about soon:

Henry Morgan (from Forever tv) !! also, I’d love to write more about Captain Jack Sparrow

fandom(s) you’re currently writing for:

Harrow & Stranger Things

platonic pairing(s) you currently write for:

Daniel Harrow & Simon Van Reyk (Harrow), Henry Creel & Eleven (Stranger Things)

romantic pairing(s) you currently write for:

I know it’s been more than a year since my last update so I can’t say currently, but Loki/Mobius. other than that the more recent one is Will Byers/Mike Wheeler but even then, it’s still rare. so I guess I focus more on writing platonic relationships lately (honestly it just depends on the characters whom my hyperfixation is on and whether their relationship with the other characters is romantic or platonic.)

your top 3 tags on AO3 (if you post your works on AO3):

whump, hurt/comfort & angst

your current platform where you post your works:

tap HERE for my AO3

snippet of the wip you’re currently working on:

should be posted hopefully within the next few days!

But Harrow forced a smile as he greeted Simon with a hug. And when he hugged Simon, his smile became real. And for a moment Harrow could forget the guilt and the shame he carried with him. For a moment, he could really breathe, knowing that Simon was safe. In his arms.

* aka a fix-it fic where Simon lives.

🏷️ no pressure tags at random: @foodiewithdahoodie @queereldritch @bebataylor84 @ohfallingdisco @eddiemunsons-missingnipple @sillylittlerock @jcbbby @maladaptive-jcb @highwarlockofphilly @can-of-pringles @mirilyawrites @chaos-monkeyy @harringroveera @medium-rare-bimbo @deliaqbower @ripcreel @rins-love-wins @okilokiwithpurpose @lokisgoodgirl @loki-is-my-kink-awakening @daddiesdrarryy @loki-hargreeves @zodiyack @cha-melodius @insert-witty-user-name-here @dewdropreader @blackbirdofasgard @mimisempai @underwhelmingalchemist @excusemefangirlhere @abitofboth @worstloki @littlekinng @andiwriteordie @cluelessbees @suzieburself @waroftheposes @drop-of-infinity @bookinit02 @bizarrelittlemew @ghostalservice @pilkingtonian @thefatedthoughtofyou @brbsoulnomming @spooky-brakers @cosmicanamnesis @cranberrymoons @onirislanding @thefreakandthehair @thisapplepielife — if I didn’t tag you and you’d like to join, please do! everybody is welcome

[stellanova002]

Sanders Sides Highschool AU - “Stay True to Yourself”

This story is going to focus on all the sides and the different dilemmas they face. (The dilemmas can reach from school, family, friends to personal identity.)

Characters: Logan, Patton, Roman, Virgil and Remus and Janus.

Summary: Virgil has moved around all his life and never been able to quite settle down. He and his dad have just moved to Florida, and Virgil is super nervous about starting high school. Adding to the already existing fear of going to high school, is also the fact that Virgil always has been picked on in school. He doesn’t know if it is because of his style in clothing, his hobbies or the fact that he is.....well, gay. And he has finally had enough! Virgil decides to put on a tougher persona, so, when school starts he is never letting anyone mess with him ever again.

-

Chapter 1

Growing up and figuring out who you are is one of the hardest challenges you can face; Especially as a teenager. You are expected to know what you want your future to look like while you also struggle with grades, family, friends, and all the other things going on in your body. You are no longer a child but also nowhere near grown-up. And the adults in your life will constantly remind you of this. They seem to get to decide when you are old enough to take responsibility and when you are too young to make your own decisions. 

And nowhere is this more apparent than in high school. 

It is Monday morning and the summer break is over. A small car is driving on the highway with two individuals inside. A father and a son. In the car's backseat, the son, Virgil, shifts his focus from the road to the window, trying to keep himself occupied. The world outside keeps on passing by and the speed is making all buildings, trees, and people look like blurred objects. 

Meanwhile, in the driver's seat, the father adjusts the rearview mirror to take a look at his son. Virgil has his head leaned on his palm and is staring out the window, he is wearing his usual striped hoodie, a dark purple t-shirt, and ripped black jeans. 

Virgil’s father sights. It’s been two years since the death of his wife and Virgil has been going through a lot. He has lost count of how many times Virgil has had to switch schools because of bullying, and how many times they’d been forced to move because of his old job. 

Virgil and his father are new to the city, they recently moved here during the summer break. One of the many reasons for moving was that Virgil's father got a new job and he thought it would be the perfect opportunity to start over. 

The light from the sun then bounces off the mirror and reflects onto Virgil. Virgil who is blinded by it turns to see where it came from, only to discover that his dad is looking at him.

Noticing that he’s been caught his dad quickly looks back on the road, embarrassed.

Virgil then sits up and starts to fiddle with his fingers, unable to distract from his thoughts any longer.

'What if I screw up? What if I say something wrong that will make everyone hate me?! Dad would eventually find out and come to the confusion that we'd have to move again. Fuck. Can we even afford to move?! Dad just got a new job. We just got here and now I'm going to end up ruining everything! Why do I always have to be such a pain?!'

Virgil's father tries to call his son's name but Virgil is not responding - being too caught up in his spiraling thoughts. 

The car then slows down to a gentle crawl. Virgil's father leans back and gently pats Virgil on his knee. "Hey buddy, how are you holding up?" His touch is enough to snap Virgil out of it. 

After a moment's silence, Virgil turns to his dad and shrugs. “I dunno. Fine, I guess…”

“That did not look fine." 

“I- I’m just nervous”, Virgil admits, “I don’t want to screw this up.”

"You won't screw anything up." His father's gaze is stern. "You never have and you never will." 

Virgil wrinkles his nose and scoffs. 'We all know that's not true' 

"Besides everyone is nervous on their first day, you won't be the only one."

"Yeah, but not everyone has anxiety", Virgil mutters to himself. 

His father turns his head away, clenching his jaw, not knowing how to respond to that. Instead, they continue to drive in silence. 

Virgil is sitting hunched, his body turned away from his dad. 

"What I meant to say was… ", his father says, unable to take the silence any longer, "Everyone is starting their freshman year. This is a new school and people have surely matured during the summer. I don't think you have anything to be afraid of." 

"I'm not so sure… I mean look at me!" Virgil gestures to himself. 

"I am", his father says, "and all I see is a perfectly normal boy." 

Virgil snorts. "Yeah right, because a normal boy would totally wear this, put on eyeshadow, and get a crush on other boys!" 

"Yes!" 

"Normal boys didn't get bullied like me, dad!" 

His dad grips the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turn white. Of course, he knows that Virgil has never been like most kids; He was always a little too sensitive and enjoyed things that most boys didn't. However, all that still doesn't justify how other people treated him. 

Yes, his son may not be like the majority but so what!? There is nothing wrong with that. 

"We're here…" The car, now in the school's parking lot, comes to a stop. Virgil climbs out of the car and grabs his backpack, he adjusts the large headphones around his neck and shuts the door. 

His father scrolls down the car window.

"Love you, stormcloud."

Virgil gives his father a small smile. "Yeah, I know dad.." 

He tilts his head, a serious expression on his face. "And promise me that you will begin to stand up for yourself."

"...Yeah...I’ll try...." 

The window slowly begins to creep back up. "I'm serious!”, he points to his son, “I need to get to work now, call me if you need anything and please, at least try to make some friends. Okay, kiddo?" 

Virgil just nods, not willing to make any promises. 

The car then begins to drive away and fade from Virgil's eye view. After it disappears Virgil takes a deep breath as he turns to look at his new school, a dreaded feeling in his stomach. 

Ugh! He is so tired of being scared of places like this. 

Behind this door, anything could happen. His life could finally change for the better; he could meet new friends and make high school the best years of his life...or….It could be another school filled with bullies making him wish he was never born.

Although... thinking back to his earlier school years, Virgil might think of a way to make people leave him alone. In his previous schools, there were always those kids that nobody dared to mess with. They were confident, took no one’s bullshit, and had, let’s just say...a bad reputation. Not even the worst bullies dared to do anything to them. 

With determination in his eyes, Virgil flattens his hair and makes his bangs cover his eyes. He straightens his posture, puts his hands in his pockets, and marches towards the school. 

“Friends”, Virgil sneers, “Never had them before so why should I need them now?" 

'Besides, who would even want to be friends with someone like me…' 

-

"Patton!"

"Yeah, mom?!"

"Could you please come down and help me, sweetie?!" 

"Of course! I'll be right there!"

Twenty minutes away from the school, in a nice little cul-de-sac, a boy dressed in a cyan-blue polo shirt and grey cardigan bounces down the stairs and walks into his kitchen. 

In the kitchen, his mom is standing and preparing lunch while his siblings, Liam and Fiona, are eating cereal by the kitchen table.

Patton gives his mom a huge smile. "Morning, mom!" 

She returns the gesture, "Good morning", she says and puts in three peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in the lunch bags. 

Patton looks around, "What did you want help with?" 

"Can you take these bags and put them in Fiona and Liam's backpacks." 

"Sure thing!" 

Patton walks up to his mom, gives her a peck on the cheek, and takes the sandwiches to the backpacks down the hall. 

After putting the bags in the backpacks Patton checks to see if his siblings have packed everything; extra clothes; some fruit; a stuffed animal. He just knows they can't bear to be without them. 

When he gets back to the kitchen, Fiona and Liam have already put their bowls in the sink and run upstairs to brush their teeth. 

Patton is just about to go up and see if they need help when his mom calls for him:

“Patton, honey can I talk to you for a second?” The smile on her face is gone and she is standing with her arms tangled in front of her. 

Patton hesitates. Has he done something wrong?

He puts his hands behind his back and twists his body before he makes his way to his mom, eyes looking down at the floor. 

She kneels, takes a hold of his hands, and pulls them forward. 

"Am I in trouble…?", Patton asks, a lump forming in his throat. 

"No, sweetie…", she kisses his forehead, "You're not in trouble. I'm sorry if I made it seem that way." 

Patton’s whole body relaxes and he lets out a sigh of relief.

“Your Dad and I have just been talking about something", her smile drops and it turns into a frown. "We are going to be very short on staff at work, both at the hospital and at the residential home. It is going to be very likely that we both need to work overtime. This will affect a lot of things back home, things like picking up Fiona and Liam from school, dropping them off at training, and helping them with their homework." His mom grabs his hand tightly. "I know this isn’t fair - but Dad and I need you to step up and take some more responsibility. Can you do that?“

Patton’s parents both work in service jobs. His dad works as a nurse at the hospital and his mom works at a residential home. It's not the best-paying jobs but they manage to get by and Patton couldn’t be more proud of them and the work that they do. 

But there is part of him that is worried about how this will affect school. What if this is going to negatively affect his grades and make him fall behind. 

Patton looks at his mom, standing there in her uniform, looking tired and just waiting for an answer. He can’t possibly say something to make her feel bad. He is starting high school right now, he shouldn’t even have any hesitations about this… 

A selfless person wouldn't…. 

Patton puts on his most genuine smile. “Of course. It is about time to practice some...uhh….adultery!”

She snickers. 

“I am so proud of you! Continuing to be our happy little boy.”

“That’s me!”, Patton points to himself. 

Mom gives him a hug, stands up, and lightly pushes him towards the stairs. “I think it’s time for you to go up and tell your brother and sister that they need to hurry up. The school bus is almost here.” 

-

“Beep! Beep! Beep!” Roman groans at the sound of the alarm.

The alarm keeps beeping for a while before he sits up in his bed and turns to the side to shut it off. Roman then quickly yawns and looks at the clock: 

It’s 6:50. 

School starts at 8:00 so he might as well wake up and get ready. It takes time to look as fabulous as he does every day. 

And it's about half an hour's drive from his dad's mansion to the school. 

Roman gets out of bed and makes his way to the bathroom. He passes by his brother Remus' room and it's pitch black, he is still fast asleep and snoring loudly.

Roman rolls his eyes and walks up to his brother's bed. He claps his hands and the lights turn on, but Remus just groans. Roman then grabs the covers and pulls them off. 

But as the covers come off Roman sees something he wishes he could unsee. "OH MY GOD!", Roman shrieks.

There laying in his bed is Remus; Naked. 

Remus stretches out his whole body, sheepishly smiling at Roman. "Morning, Ro. Slept well?" 

"Shut up! Where are your clothes?!" 

Remus swings his feet off the bed, laughing. "You should know that by now, Roman. I sleep in the buff." 

"That is disgusting!" Roman throws a pair of underwear at his brother. "Get dressed."

While Remus puts on the underpants Roman goes to the bathroom to get ready. He locks the door, takes off his pajamas, and gets in the shower. 

After washing himself and putting on deodorant, Roman looks at his reflection in the mirror. 'Looking good~'.

He dries his hair, combs it, and finishes it up with some hairspray. And as a final touch, he puts on a light patch of makeup - some baby cream, foundation, and just a small winged eyeliner. 

'Wouldn't want dad to make a big deal of it.'

BAM! BAM! BAM! 

Roman flinches at the sudden noise. "What the hell Remus?!"

Remus continues to knock on the door."Get out of the bathroom, Ro! It's my turn. You know that there's not enough makeup in the world to improve that mug!"

"WE HAVE THE SAME FACE." 

Roman takes his bathrobe and throws the door open. He gives his brother an annoyed glance as they switch places. 

He looks at the clock in the hall: 7:15 

Shit!!!

Roman ruches back to his room and puts on the clothes he laid out yesterday. After putting on tight-fitted jeans, a white t-shirt, and a red sports-jacket, he runs down the house's marble staircase and into the kitchen. 

As Roman enters the kitchen, he sees that his father is in the dining room reading the newspaper with a cup of coffee. Roman hesitates before he fills his bowl with some yogurt and berries, and joins him at the table. His father is wearing his pristine dark blue suit and his suitcase rest beside his chair. 

He glances at Roman, eyeing him up and down. “Son.”

“Father.”

Remus arrives just a few minutes later, his hair is wet from the shower and he's putting on socks in a hurry. He's wearing a booger green shirt, black military-printed pants, and a spiked leather jacket. Remus glances at the clock and notices that he has limited time, so he decides to take a banana from the fruit bowl. The atmosphere is uneasy as they all continue to eat their breakfast. 

The father then takes a long sip of his coffee before folding his newspaper and leaning down on the table. 

“Boys, you are about to move onto the next stage of your lives and I think it’s important that you begin to act your age.” He glares at Roman. “Which starts by quitting your childish hobbies and focusing on something more worthwhile”. 

Roman slams his hand on the counter. "But dad!" 

"No objections! You are a talented sportsman son, it's about time you quit that girly activity and apply to the school's football team." 

He then looks at Remus, who has put the whole banana in his mouth. “And Remus, I don't ask for much, just don't get into a habit of getting into trouble. And please, try not to ruin this family’s reputation…”

“Yes, dad…”, Roman sights.

“Whatever you say, pops” Remus scoffs, why should he care about his family's stupid reputation. It's only a reputation for being boring rich snobs anyway. 

Their father straightens his tie, stands up, and grabs his suitcase. "Mr. Sato will drive you to school. I have to get to the airport for my business trip. You’ll be staying with your mom this week, and I’ll see you at the end of the weekend." He puts away his coffee mug and leaves the kitchen without saying anything else to them; no “good luck”, no “have a great day”, or even “I love you”. 

Roman can only hope to hear at least a goodbye from his father but knows he is gone the moment the front door slams shut.

The twins then finish their breakfast and step outside, waiting for Mr.Sato to drive the car out of the garage. He opens the door for both of them, respectfully nodding his head to say good morning. Roman returns the gesture. 

Mr. Sato is the boy’s personal chauffeur, the one who has taken them to school for most of their lives. Roman really likes Sato, he always listens to him and makes him feel like he can be himself around him. He’s who Roman will turn to when he needs to vent to anyone besides his friends. 

Roman’s face lights up as he thinks about them. That’s right, he’ll see his friends today! God, how he’s missed them. Patton’s warm hugs, Logan’s wordplays, their playful banter. 

If one thing is certain is that these school years will be just like the rest. Just him, Logan, and Patton. Like it always has been. 

Like it always will be.