#even though the run took me ages to read bc brain issues

[sanktalucrezias]

cassandra cain saved my life.

[ddarker-dreams]

FINALLY SOMEONE SAID THE TRUTH.

I admit that i enjoyed act 3 but it feels like really rushed i have so much complain with that.

The build up until act 2 was so good it give us so much premise but the final blow si meh. Sorry that i want to share thing long rant with you

1. Why the final talk is with yae, no offense to her but we need ei to explain not to mention she witness khaenriah downfall so she can give us more information, i feel like they do it for the plot armor so they can just keep dragging this

2. So many things that quite inconsistant, the shogun is show no mercy to anyone that even did a little thing outside what she think its right, how come she can still have a talk with signora, when sara is falling like that, and also there is no clarification about sara right now.

The traveler was so done at first they refuse to help thoma and ayaka at the beginning. But they seem so happy and forget everything how come they are not RAGE ( okay maybe this is to bias and personal) when this nation provide nothing about our siblings information and also why they are not mention anything about their problem in ei stroy quest. Its nonsense! She is right in front of youu, ask about your siblings, ask about khaenriah, ask about ukmown god!!. How come they can just forget like that. Also mihoyo really waste the potential about twin things i thing ei will give us so much help bcs of the sympathy that we both rn lost our twin but noooo.

3. Kokomi seem lost some brain cell, she make a very succesfull grand intro but she become meh in act 3, how come a great strategist like her let the sus sponsorship slip just bcs they are desperate, not to mention her screen time is really small and her role seem so unsignificant and it feels lile she is a plain npc.

4. The awesome world quest that we have done doesnt get any mention at all! Inazuma owe us so much with cleansing sakura, thunder sakura, tatarigami, obarashi quest. It has so much potential that yae or ei or anyone else aknowledge what traveler has been done but nooo.

cracks knuckles... i suppose it's time for my promised dissertation. interestingly enough, you touched on a lot of the main issues i had with chapter III.

i think that if i had to pin the main issue, it's a lack of overall cohesiveness? we were jumping all over the place without the chance to ever flesh things out. inazuma is a smaller cast, but i feel like we didn't get to see any of them shine. since i'm most interested in the genshin characters, i'll break down my problems by going over everyone and their (lack) of impact on the story.

was ayaka not questioned or placed under suspicion for being close to thoma before his escape? i wanted to see her broken up over her duties as they relate to the yashiro commission, paired with having someone she genuinely cares about in danger. it would've been an interesting struggle if she was forced to choose one or the other. instead she just kinda took a back seat.

speaking of thoma, i don't even have anything to say, because he just... was there? for .0001 seconds. said "lol this sucks ig" and that's about it. i know we're going to get a story for him in the future since he's a 5* but i'm not getting my hopes up 😭 then in the raiden shogun's character story, man is peachy keen! be upset with the raiden shogun! have some inner conflict! even if it's just using loaded language because he's under surveillance for going against the raiden shogun, that'd be so cool. saying something like,

"Traveler, what's with that expression? Oh please, there's nothing to worry about. We're under the Statue of the Omnipresent God's protection. Nothing bad has ever happened here." *wink*

i also don't know what to say about gorou. he was... there....... i think. what is he fighting for? what are the stakes for him? what makes him place so much trust into kokomi? i'm out of things to say about him because i don't remember anything he did or said.

kokomi... oh kokomi... i was so hyped. so excited. i thought that maybe we could see a foil to the raiden shogun. that she'd have a moment where she's forced to realize, just like her opponent, sacrifices must be made that will hurt people who will never understand why she made them. or maybe something to show her military prowess. but instead she just accepts a mysterious patron's help (?), sees her people aging like the grateful dead from JJBA, and goes oh well. that sucks. what can ya do. oh bye traveler i guess, good luck with that. ????????????? HUH... similar case to thoma where she's gonna get a character story but like. she won't be the leader of the resistance anymore. that was her whole shtick. they took her shtick away. also she forced me to interact with more NPCs whose names i've already forgotten so i'm tilted about that still.

KUJOU SARA... AN INJUSTICE. A DISGRACE. a slap to my woman loving face. the build up was there. yae miko's comments about sara probably knowing the tenryou commission is involved in shady dealings, but is choosing not to think about it. sara being forced to confront reality and challenge her adopted father with the truth. being able to blaze a new path for herself in the process. when she started running to the raiden shogun i was ultra hyped up. sara, a devotee to the shogun for so long, was about to see her god interacting with the same people who led inazuma to this awful state. how would she react? would she stay ignorant, like yae miko so coyly said, choosing to look away in favor of following her god's footsteps? or would she be forced to recognize the raiden shogun isn't as divine as she once thought, and challenge her belief system?

we open the door to see the raiden shogun. the loading screen ensues. the camera pans to the ominous room, clouded in darkness, hinting at the ominous confrontation that is to come. the music takes a serious timbre. and then...

well fuck that potential character arc i guess. (we still don't know what sara made of any of this since she poofed out of existence from the story at this point)

kazuha also was handed a similar treatment. we've been with him for a while longer now. he is our introduction into inazuma, the one who first gets us emotionally involved by regaling us with the bittersweet tale of friendship that led him to becoming a wanted criminal. a kind soul who loves nature yet was dealt a cruel hand by fate, forced to watch his home nation turn into a hostile place, where his dear friend ultimately perished as a result. we get the scene with his friend's vision lighting back up. he parries a block from the raiden shogun, in the same area where his friend was killed by her. the parallels. the drama. except this time, he wasn't too late. he protected the traveler where he "failed" to protect his friend in the past. did he feel redemption at this? or was it a bittersweet reminder of what could've been?

WELL i guess we'll never know because we didn't get to talk to him again 😭 idk who got a bait and switch worse, him or sara. jesus christ mihoyo.

then we have signora. why is the raiden shogun talking to her? does she know about the gnosis being taken, and if she doesn't, what was her plan to get it from the archon? what does she think about scaramouche? and oh, okay, we're fighting here now. good fight + god tier music. pog pog. okay, now we've beaten her up, and raiden shogun wyd— wait no not signora her lore is still on CUPS not YET raiden shogun and— ah she's dead. okay. non nerds who didn't read artifact lore are going to know nothing about her. signora has such an interesting story, and yet... well. ok.

then we get raiden shogun redemption (?) arc. i was hype for this as well, though at that point, idk why i bothered being hype. i knew they were gonna do a cute power of friendship something or another, and i'm good with that, so long as it's executed well. what i was envisioning was like seven different buffs to correspond with the seven different visions, the dreams of those whose ambitions were stolen serving as the spear to penetrate the raiden shogun's heart of stone. maybe a hydro vision giving us extra healing for a time, with the voice acting over it being like,

"Even if the rest of the world forgets us, let our will carry you through this one final time. Succeed where we couldn't, Traveler."

so on and so forth.

but instead we got— you get the idea at this point. why bother spelling it out anymore.

at that point i was surprised the raiden shogun didn't go "oopsie woopsie!! we made a fucky wucky!!!" because that was the vibe i was getting. i love ei, don't get me wrong, but i wanted to see her challenged with what she had done to inazuma in the past year. maybe meeting NPC #2345259 who lost her sister to the vision decree or something, reminding ei of the love she held for her sister... being forced to come to terms with the extent of what she's done in pursuit of eternity.

anyway. please for the love of god mihoyo hire better writers for the main story. that is all i ask. thank you.

[gryfon-spanish-werewolf]

The Choice - Part 2

Part 2 of my elsanna Hulder/Valkyrie au :D I know I said I’d make them 1-1.5k but I guess my sweet spot is 2-3k ¯\_(^^;)_/¯  Good for y’all

I highly recommend reading Chapter 1 and/or the original concept for context because this chapter picks up EXACTLY where we left off. And I do mean exactly. ao3 and ff.net links are up too!

Shout out to @like-red-lads again for indulging me in the concept, @giuliaciulia89 bc I know you’ve been waiting patiently for this one, and a quick spike for @snowmanmelting since you asked ever so politely for a notification of publishing 💖

--------------------------------------------------

The woman who still crouched naked in the water leveled a glare at the Valkyrie. “What do you mean you don’t know?”

Anna felt like someone had wedged the padding of her armor directly into her skull. Her thoughts zipped too and fro, bouncing off the sides while whatever still sane part of her brain jumped desperately in the middle, trying to grab even one coherent thought.

Who are you? Well that’s easy, I’m Anna, the Valkyrie! Wait no, no, I can’t say that, humans that are still alive can’t know that.

What are you doing here? So funny story - I felt like I needed to be here and find you and I know why but I can't tell you or you won’t believe me, or maybe worse you will believe me and then we’re still stuck because-

Life or Death?

This question was causing the most trouble. Anna felt the answer gallop up her throat again, only for it to wilt and corkscrew off somewhere else as it neared the tip of her tongue. It leaped up her legs and tornado’d around her insides like a rock trapped in a gale, bruising everything it touched, but still it didn’t make itself known to her. It was a pressure, the kind that rattled the lid of a pot over-boiling above the cookfire.

Anna shook her head, feeling more than a little dizzy. The remaining part of her brain that was still running around for a legitimate answer grew tired as well and sat down, which prompted Anna to do the same, plopping down onto the rock below her feet in an unceremonious heap. The woman across from her flinched.

“I guess I mean,” Anna replied slowly as she crossed her arms over her chest, “that I really don’t know. And that’s never happened before.”

The woman narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “Which part?”

“All of them. Oh!” Anna pounded her fist into her palm. “Except the first question, I can answer that one. I’m Anna!” She grinned broadly, just like she had for the warrior in the battlefield. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“I wish I could say the same,” the woman groused, “but considering the circumstances, you will have to forgive me for not feeling the same.”

“It’s certainly odd,” Anna mused aloud, putting her chin in her hand. She missed the other woman’s exasperated expression entirely. “Today started out so normal but now everything is strange.”

“That I can agree with.”

“I know!” Anna threw her arms out. “First there was the fight, then my plans changed without warning and I miss my ride home, then I stumble-sprint through the forest following your voice and now you’re talking to me and--!” Anna pulled up short.

She was having a conversation with a human.

A live human.

Which meant…

“Hey, this is going to sound like a trick question but, you can see me, right?”

The woman blinked, a furrow deepening between her brows. “That… does seem like a trick question.” Anna waited patiently, and saw the moment the other woman realized she would have to answer: a defeated drop of her shoulders. “Yes. Yes I can see you.”

“Oh good!” Anna chirped. “I mean uh, not good, actually,” she frowned and looked to the side, thinking. “Well not baaaad.” Anna bobbed her hands in front of her, as though physically weighing the implications on a scale. “Just… unexpected, y’know?”

The look on the blonde’s face told Anna that she did not, in fact, know.

“I… can imagine that thinking you can’t be seen, only to be seen, would be… unexpected,” was the diplomatic reply.

But Anna had already retreated back into her own head, her mini-me having rested long enough to start picking up the pieces and sorting them into piles. Piles of Normal, piles of Weird, and piles of Highly Irregular.

Being seen by a living human was definitely Highly Irregular.

Maybe something had gone wrong with the magic today, or by leaving the company of her sisters the cloaking spell had frayed and broken with distance. Regardless, if this woman did not suspect Anna’s true nature, then she supposed it wasn’t a big deal. She still had the largest issue at hand anyway.

Again the Choice stirred under the skin of her palms, racing past her funny bone in a jolt and stinging the junction of shoulder and neck before disappearing like a snuffed candle.

“Any update on that second part,” a voice startled Anna from her thoughts, “or are we free to move on with our lives?” The woman in the water had started to shiver, goosebumps covering her arms and legs.

“I’m sorry!” Anna jumped up and reached out. “Here, let me help you up.”

The blonde looked at her hand like it was a poisonous snake. “I’m more than capable of getting out myself, thank you.” Her gaze flicked back up to Anna’s, “Especially because you won’t tell me why you’re here. Or you can’t remember, which I can’t say is any better.”

“Oh, right, well…” Anna withdrew her hand and rubbed the back of her neck instead. “I’ll let you do that then.”

A beat passed before something seemed to click in the woman’s brain. “You’re just going to stand there?”

“Huh? Yeah?” Anna cocked her head, “I mean, we’re both women.”

“We’re also strangers,” the woman responded, grinding the final word between her teeth.

“Sure but, it’s not a big deal, I’ve seen plenty of naked women.”

This time it was the blonde who blushed, making her hair stand out more starkly against her reddened skin. “Right,” she said flatly. “Be that as it may, if you’re so determined to stay I’d prefer it if you at least turned around.”

“I… of course. If it makes you more comfortable.” Anna spun on her heel, her back to the water. Throughout their conversation, the strength of the tugging had ebbed, less a riptide and more a kitten batting at a string of yarn, pulling against the middle vertebrae of her spine.

If the woman replied it was lost in the swoosh and splatter of water as she moved from the middle of the stream to the bank. Anna heard the droplets of water splash onto the rocks below, sometimes more, sometimes less. Perhaps she was wringing out her hair.

“Don’t peek,” the woman scolded.

“I wasn’t going to!”

“Prove it. Close your eyes.”

Anna nearly turned around to answer in spite, but caught herself and set her eyes straight into the trees. “I’m already facing away from you, isn’t closing my eyes a little much?” But Anna did as she was told.

“No,” came the muffled reply, as though the woman had turned away from her, also. There was a ruffle of cloth and the sounds of dressing, the clasp of a belt and the slide of shoes.

And then there was the knife.

It was nearly impossible for someone of Anna’s age and battle prowess to mistake the sound of a blade leaving it’s sheathe. And even if she had, the tether pressing against her back suddenly ignited - combusting, roaring and leaping against her like a brush fire.

In a heartbeat Anna whirled around, knees bent and legs spread apart. The woman stood before her a few feet away, now dressed, though water still dripped from her legs and soaked the fabric of her dress at the collar. Between them was a hunting knife, pointed at Anna’s heart.

“You’re armed!?” Anna blurted out.

“Isn’t everyone?” The woman called back, gesturing with the tip of the knife to Anna’s waist before aiming right back at her center. “And so are you, by the way.”

“Yes but that’s because I’m--!” Anna clapped a hand over her mouth in the nick of time. She couldn’t just say she was a Valkyrie, there had to be some kind of rule against that.

“A warrior, I know.” The woman scoffed. Anna swore for a moment her eyes flashed like the glint of sea rime at dawn but it was gone just as fast. “Come from the battle up the hill have you? Is that why you won’t tell me what you’re doing here, you’re not sure whose side I’m on? Whether I’ll run away from you or into your arms? Or are you a deserter? Tucking your tail between your legs and winding up here, caught without a backup plan?”

“Yes! No. What? Absolutely not. A-And no! In that order!” Anna straightened, rubbing a hand on her temple. Her head was starting to ache, not just from the situation (which was already far, far beyond what she’d ever imagined), but from the strain of the pull on her body. Never had it lasted so long or been so overwhelming. It trod up her sternum and into her throat, dancing along the edges of her jaw. Anna ground the heel of her forward foot into the rock below, needing to physically restrain herself from walking forward. The woman noticed her shift in posture and took a half step back. “Yes, I came from the battle,” Anna said, taking a deep breath. “But not because I was involved in it. I came here because… because I needed to find you. Because I heard you singing.”

Well that was true enough, Anna thought to herself. “Who lives and who dies is important to me,” she continued, finding her way through the half truths that would have to bear her along, like stepping stones made from clouds. “But equally important is that those who are not destined for combat are spared. That those whose lives are decided by other things are not drawn into battle needlessly.”

The woman knelt slowly, keeping her front towards Anna at all times while retrieving a bag from behind a rock. She slung it over her shoulder before speaking. “Oh, so you are a judge, too,” she said icily. “Well then decide. But bear in mind - your choice is not the only one guiding my fate today.”

Decide. Choose.

The words barked in Anna's head, bayed like hounds on the scent. The Choice bore down on her again, like the stones that crushed guilty men, one on top of another.

“My name is Anna,” she said gravely, drawing upon the power with which she made Choices before the war drums had even played their first beat.

“Part one,” the woman counted, standing tall.

“I came here to solve a mystery, to find whomever was at the end of a string… a song.”

“Part two…”

Anna felt it, the Choice zinging up her arm, raising the hairs on her neck, feeling the thrum of her heart in her chest. It was time.

“And I choose... to let you go.”

Silence passed between them, and then the woman frowned, the tip of her knife dropping just slightly. “What?”

“I mean, I never meant to keep you here, and I’m sorry that you felt threatened.” Anna placed as much compassion as she could muster into her words, which was quite a lot. One didn’t get good at comforting dead souls by being callous for hundreds of years. Besides, this woman was only human, and if there was a problem with Choosing, that wasn’t her folly but Anna’s, and something she needed to investigate on her own. “You must live somewhere nearby?” Anna coaxed. “The village southwest of here perhaps, down the hills? I’m sure they’ll be happy to see you safe. I won’t tell anyone you were here, just in case. But it’s not safe to stick around. You should go back home.”

“Home…” The word fell oddly from the blonde’s lips. “Yes I-, I’ll do that.”

Anna rocked back on her heels, hands settling genially on her hips. Despite the draw she still felt between her and this woman, it was manageable now. She wasn’t sure what she was going to tell her fellow Valkyries about this, but she’d cross that bridge when she came to it.

“If it’s all the same to you,” the woman said, interrupting Anna’s thoughts, “I’ll wait until you leave. You’ve made yourself more trustworthy than you first appeared, but I’d not like to take chances.”

Anna smiled despite the scrutiny. “Well I was going to offer to walk you home, but you seem like you can take care of yourself. That knife has hardly lowered once.”

“I think that’s a genuine compliment, for which I’ll say, ‘thank you’.” The flicker of a smile came and went in the dappled sunlight across the woman’s face, so quickly Anna almost missed it. “Don’t take this the wrong way… Anna,” the woman spoke as Anna began walking back into the forest, “but I hope I never see you again.”

The Valkyrie’s heart trilled at the use of her name, even as sadness dampened it’s cheer. It was entirely possible they’d never meet again. Perhaps on the next morn, battle long over, Anna would wake and the pull would disappear completely. Freed from the burden of Choice until it came around next time, for someone new. Though, Anna hadn’t been lying when she said she’d arrived following a mystery. And mysteries hated going unsolved.

But for now she trudged through the trees back toward the hill, throwing a last hand over her shoulder in farewell.

With each step the tug grew lighter and lighter - a snag, a tap, a whisper across the room, until finally it was only noticeable if she concentrated.

Clear frost filigree inside a spyglass.

------

Elsa waited until the Valkyrie was long out of sight. She sheathed her knife only when birdsong came back to the wood, and with that movement went the last of her strength.

She fell to her hands and knees, trembling.

A Valkyrie. A Valkyrie had come looking for her.

In all her years, all her centuries of life, Elsa had never been so close to one. She knew who they were and to whom they were sworn. What they dedicated their life to. Reaping souls for the glory of another war and leaving the rest to rot.

Elsa breathed heavily, her brave and icy façade melting as her lungs begged for air to quell the panic in her heart. She’d made a mistake reacting to the Valkyrie's presence, even if it had been a genuine surprise. Humans couldn’t see Valkyries, and if Elsa wanted to remain hidden, she needed to keep pretending she was human.

But the Valkyrie… Anna..., had seemed distracted too. Something had been bothering her, or maybe even hurting her.

Yet she’d been armed, and knew how to use the sword at her hip. She was a woman who decided whether a person would continue on to see the sunset or not.

Even though she’d been kind, Elsa had not been willing to take the risk.

Elsa’s jaw clenched, her hands forming fists, drawing lines in the sand and loose dirt of the riverbank. She’d been clumsy but she hadn’t been caught. Her secret was safe, for now. The Valkyrie still thought she was nothing but an innocent woman, bathing too close to a battlefield.

She gathered the rest of her things, not that she had many. It was time to disappear and lay low for a while. The song she was singing before came back to her mind, but now it felt tainted so she didn’t even hum. Her malaise showed despite her best efforts however, in the irritable swish and flick of her tail beneath her dress.

That is when she had felt the most terror. Anna had not just come upon her naked in flesh, but in spirit.

Every moment she’d crouched in the water had been eons in her mind. Her muscles still ached with the effort of keeping her tail wound around her calf and ankle. Praying that the Valkyrie would have the modesty not to look, or if she didn’t, to be unable to see through the ripples in the water.

Coupled with the intense need to keep her front to Anna’s at all times, lest she see her back, left Elsa with hardly enough energy to stand.

That’s why Elsa had asked her to close her eyes, even with her back turned. She couldn’t trust the Valkyrie’s word, not when Elsa didn’t know the true reason she’d come. While her lie about following a song hadn’t been entirely false, it certainly wasn’t the whole truth. At least Anna had complied with her request. Elsa wasn’t sure what she’d have done if she hadn’t.

Probably disappear into thin air.

But that would have been more suspicious, and Elsa had known she still had a chance to ward off the preoccupied Valkyrie. Though she’d been successful, that triumph, in its wake, only made her light headed, with nerves so bundled up in her core she felt nauseous.

Elsa checked her surroundings one last time before reaching out in front of her, a little above her head. She felt for a Seam, running the pads of her fingers up and down, along divots and warps until she found one and pulled. An opening appeared before her, like a drape pulled away from a window. Inside the world was muted, duller, quieter.

Elsa took one last breath of fresh air before she stepped inside, feeling the doorway close behind her.

After all, the Hulder did say she’d go home.

[theblackbirdsgemimagines]

Ramble away, cause I feel the twisted head rot, I kinda wanna see what you think about our bois. ~ a pocket sized dragon hops in excitement.

A POCKET SIZED DWAGOOOOOONNNN 😭💞💞💞 That’s so BLESSED, and tysm omg, I’m very glad to just spill out my barking on every boy, bc yEAH THE BRAIN ROT SKDHAKDB

THE BRAIN ROT IS SO REAL LOL

Everything I breathe ends up relating to TWST in some way, like at this point just let me take my friends, cousins, and pets, and of course Lulu and Seb, and I will have 1. A Gottdamned Harem, 2. So Many Children, and 3. NEVER WANT TO LEAVE. Kwfhskdhjwek

Ok this is gonna be long bc I gotta cover all my boys, so rip lol.

Dorm Leads:

Riddle

GOD, my Fucking Baby, my CHILD, my SWEET BABY BOY, I’M 👁💧👄💧👁

I would die for him, beetch, he is PRECIOUS ♥️

He reminds me of how I feel Ciel would behave if S/O took the place as Sebastian’s contracee, too, so like 🥺 Lots of feels 😭

Is Son, I have adopted him now. If you mistreat him, don’t ever speak to me or my son ever again. I’ll FIGHT his MOM, don’t TEST me. I’m his new mom now. His BIRD mom. So proud of him, he’s like...one of the few that’s actually shown growth in canon after his overblot kshdkadjs

Leona

👁💧👄💧👁

.....I am a Mere Simp....

Ya’ll.... I swearh to ghOD I simped hard for Scar back when I was a wee thing, I did NOT expect to simp for him AGAIN LATER IN LIFE, what the FUCK aidhskdhskdj

Like shit bitch, damn, you may not be king of Afterglow honey, but you can be king of my heart if you wAnt to bb....

Leona: *smiles once, even if it’s smugly*

Me: *WEEPING* Look at hiiiiiiim!! My sunshine booooooy! 😭

Does this make me a furry

Probably

I am too Simp to Care Anymore

I HESITATED TO GET ATTACHED BC THIS BOY LOOKS LIKE A FUCKIN WOMANIZER IF I EVER SAW ONE, BUT HE DRINKS HIS RESPECT WOMEN JUICE EVERY SINGLE MORNING AND I WAS A GONNER SNDJAJDHSJ

FUCK

Call me a Herbivore again, bully me //SLAPPED

Azul

He secretly a lil shit sometimes, but tha’s ok, it’s mostly in a silly way, especially post overblot~ UvU

The sweetest bby everytime I read fanposts on him, like god, ah 💜💜💜 WHOMST COULD BULLY SUCH A CUTE CHUBBY OCTOBABY I’LL FIGHT ALL OF EM!! A sweetheart 10/10 would be his friend 💗 Not making contracts with him tho, lol

...ok maybe SOME after his overblot, but they’re able to be easily reversed now, so it’s way more chill andhsjdj

Kalim

FUCK!!!! F U C K!!!! BABYYYYYYY!!!! BABY!!!! I HAVE ADOPTED HIM IF YOU TOUCH HIM YOU D I E

He is literally so sweet, anytime anyone was like “you’re so nice it’s annoying” I WAS READY TO COME FLYING IN TO BITCH SLAP THEM LIKE AJDHSKDHSJ (even if I also loved them lol)

Like NO you are WRONG whfksjd

He has also grown so much, and I am proud ♥️🧡

Vil

Jesus Christ, canon Vil is Hurting Meeeeee ajdhskdhsj

My fave fanon Vil is the one that recognizes all different types of beauty, though~ uvu and is v encouraging to anyone that may be struggling with self hatred 💜

Canon: Vil is pretty~.

Me: Wow, wtf???? He IS so pretty... How rude I didn’t think you were serious! Wow him??? Pretty??? Wow??? Wow...

Idia

I’m not sure yet, as I haven’t seen him very often, but of the few times that I have: BIG same, huge mood, and Me FUCKING Too, goddamn akdhakdj

Idia is my Anxiety and Anime Nerd personified tbh lol

What Ortho is to him are what all my comfort characters are to me, honestly.

Like what would you like bby, you want that singing voice?? Ok here comes a synthesizer just special for you~. Ily, mwah~ u3u 💕

Malleus

HEAVY BREATHING

Ok maybe it’s just the lack of story/info out on him yet, but I don’t currently simp as hard for him compared to Leona, I’ll admit jajdkajd

BUT BOY HOWDEY DO I EVER STILL S I M P...

He Is Baby... And I Lob Him....

I am going to smooch those horns and forehead crown of beautiful scales 🖤🖤🖤 I am going to do it!!!! Here I go!!!

HE CAN HAVE ALL THE ICE CREAM AND TAMAGATCHI DATES HE WANTS I’M- 😭

This man is too precious for words, and I have so much childhood nostelgia to ‘enchanted’ woods, and being in the mountains, so he has Old Fae Friend vibes to me~🖤

DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON FORM DRAGON F-

Ngl I ship him and Leona a lil bit lol

No, not just bc that makes a poly with my two faves easier, but that is a bonus factor jadhajdj

Vice Dorm Heads:

Trey

Oh my god, the Daddy to my Mommy with all these newly adopted lil kids of ours, ya know??? What a wholesome sweetie and funny lil shit jahdksdh~

I love him, I would gladly make tarts with, AND for him 💚💚💚

The kind of boi who I’d ship HARD with anyone he started dating bc My God it would warm my heart So Much 💞💞

Ruggie (unofficial but may as well be at this point lol)

He took a while to grow on me kadhskdhsj

But I think he’d be a sweet, if a trouble-maker of a friend to have~.

Dank you for taking care of my sweet lion bby, honey, I’m sure Farrena is a sweetheart, but boi I hope he gets his shit together to fix up where Ruggie lives 😭

I think if I met his granny, I’d CRY jadhajsh 💗💗

Leech Twins (?)

Idk if they’re vice leaders, but who cares lol

THESE are the older Big Brothers in every sense of the word. (My canon ages most everyone up just a bit, save for Riddle, Ace, Deuce, Kalim, Jamil, Cheka, and anyone already 20+)

The ANNOYING older big brothers, lol.

The ones that hug you to death (Floyd), or use you for an arm rest (Jade), and specifically Do the thing you asked/told them NOT to Do.

This is fine with me tho, I’m an only child, please give me the experience of annoying older brothers lol 💙💚

Jamil

I used to hate you bby, I’m so sorry akdhskdhs

I’ve adopted him now, and I’m v proud he’s trying, but making clear what his boundaries are, and trying to come out of a shell he was made to be in for so long 😭

AND HIS DANCING IS SICK LIKE HONESTLY I’M SUCH A PROUD MOM 💗💗💗

Rook

God. FUCKING Rook, lol.

IDK IF I SHOULD TRUST YOU, but I also kinda wanna be your friend akdhakdjs

HE CONCERNS ME but he also seems nice and v sweet sometimes, lmao

Blz don’t stalk me tho 😬

STOP SHOOTING YOUR ARROWS AROUND SCHOOL YOU BLOODY HEATHEN FRENCH PRISS, YOU ARE GOING TO KILL SOMEONE

Also, if he DARES hunt cute animals around me, especially BIRDS, I am going to GRIP him jahdkahdsk

He’s like if Lord Druitt was a Little More Nice and a Little Bit Less Creepy ajdhak

Lilia:

GOD.

I LOVE THIS FUCKING GRANDPA.

I. FUCKING. LOVE. THIS FUCKING. GRANDPA.

I absolutely hc him as nonbinary w/masc pronouns, I absoLUTELY do.

I adore him, I love him, I haven’t gotten a squish (hardcore desire to be someone’s friend, lol) this hard for a character since AngelDust, I-

Pwease be nonbinary friends with me, Lilia 🥺

THE ONLY PERSON HERE SHORTER THAN ME, BUT I’LL TAKE IT AJDHAKDHJS

Anyone know Corpse and how he plays Among Us? That’s how I see Lilia playing his video games with friends and I JUST I JUST I J U S T

The Spencer to your Carly.

He and Crowley are free to compete as Dad with me too like honestly kshdkadjjs

He’ll always be granpa tho uvu 💚💖🖤

Extras:

Ace

God, the Fucking Annoying Middle Brother that pranks you ALL THE DAMN TIME, but I love him andhakdhsk

Deuce

THE BROTHER THAT WILL BEAT UP YOUR BULLIES 💙💙💙 SWEET BABY BOY

The Josh to Ace’s Drake. The Cody to Ace’s Zack. The Freddie to your Carly and Ace’s Sam.

If he and Ace started dating, tho, I would CRY.

But regardless who they end up dating, it’ll be slow burn friends to lovers, and literally the most adorable shit to watch EVER 💞💞💞😭

Cater

Seems Like A Womanizer But Actually Drinks His Reapect Women Juice And We Stan That 🧡

Can always count on him to help tou get the best Magicram shots, bless you Cater 🧡🧡

Also rly wanna be his friend, ngl 😭 Even IF he pranks me a lot kadhakdhsj

Jack:

H E AV Y BR EA T H IN G

Ngl my feelings for him are in the air IDK IF I WANNA SMOOCH OR NOT YET I JUST KNOW I LOB HIM HE GOODEST BESTEST BOY 💛💛💛😭

If all three Savannaclaw bois got in a cuddle pile with me, I would Not Be Mad

How can I give this boy love, tell me and I will Do It

Gift him all the cacti’s he WANTS💛

God he drinks that respecc women juice bright and early on his run every morning, you KNOW he does 💛💛💛

I wawnt to pet his ears an tail an fwuffy wolf form 😭

I WAWNT TO SEE THE BOY SMILE AND BE HAPPY 💞💞💞

Sebek

CHILL CHILL CHILL CHILL CH-

He is a v devoted guard tho, we love to see it UvU

I don’t have more info on him hekdhskdj but his fanmade content seems v v sweet~ 💚

Silver

HE ATTRACTS BIRDS AND I CRY ABOUT IT PLEASE BE MY FRIEND AND TEACH ME HOW 🥺🥺🥺

Him being raised by Lilia and Malleus literally gives me so much Fucking Seratonin....... God 💞💕💗💗💞💞💗💗💕💞

Ortho

IS BABY????? IS BABY!!!!!! I’M LOVE HIM I’M ADOPTING HIM IS BABYYYYYYY 💙💙💙💙💙

Cheka:

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

He is so FUCKING CUTE what the FUCK!

Leonaaaaaaa... 🥺 Your NEPHEWWWWW 😭

I might steal him from Farrena tbh, lIKE MY CHILD NOW~ 🧡🧡

I just sob and hug him every time I see him honestly 😭

Teachers:

Dire Crowley

Ohhhhhh god oh god oh god

Be my dad. Please. Be my dad. PLEASE be my dad. Ya’ll think I’m joking, I’m not. Please adopt me. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.

This man as a father gives me so much dopamine and oxytocin and seratonin??? I have been weeping for WEEKS, please adopt me, Sir

Fathers with zero braincells being wrapped around a daughter’s little finger makes me so weak, and I am just here with Daddy Issues like ajdhakdhsj BLEASE ADOPT ME MISTER BIRD MAN

Crewel

Ew.

Forgive me, I haven’t seen much content with him in it/that could be considered wholesome, bUT JADHWKDJSJ

UncoMFORTABLE

Please keep the kink talk out of the classroom, S I R

Call me puppy one more time, see what happens, I’m not scared to fight a teacher akdhakdhsj

Trein

The Dad Figure that tries to be the stern part to Crowley’s blumbering kahdkqrhsjdj

Don’t feel as much attachment to him emotionally, but I like him~

Just let me pet your cat sometimes and give you holiday presents, and we’re cool~ ♥️

Vargas

Found the womanizer //SMACKED

And of course, I can’t forget Grim~!

He’s grown on me, and if anything happens to him I will kill everyone in the room, and then myself 😭

I will pet and snuggle and hold him all he wants and feed him all the tuna his heart desires uvu 💙

[dyketectivecomics]

At long last; another recap of my 90s Gotham reading! (or rather the notes that I took along the way) Still mostly focused on Helena & Tim atm, but change for that is on the horizon...

TW for brief mentions of sexual assault &, uhh, canon typical violence

Tim

Mostly what I wanna focus on is Robin II: Joker’s Wild which... feels like an arc that’s coming in Too Soon and only serves to Prove that tims Up to Snuff.

It’s an entertaining enough read on its own, as a story that allows Tim to Hold his own against a Major™ villain. But it’s much too soon into Tims tenure as a Robin imo, and much too soon for him to have a distinct voice yet for me. It’s just... odd.

I suppose thats some of the appeal for early Tim, I can totally see him as a character here that’s supposed to be an easy way for a reader to project himself onto (he’s a Teen™, he’s a Nerd™, but even one of the Jocks™ in the story briefly point out how easy it’d be for him to be Popular™) and ofc he’s an easy way for a reader to then live vicariously through him.

having read 90s YJ already though... I can already say that I like him infinitely more in that setting than I do rn with how Dixon has handled him thus far...

again. not gonna be one of my fav robins. but i can see the meta appeal of him for others

Helena

We finally wrap up the latter “half” of the Huntress solo run and #13 opens right up with Helena rescuing a girl who’s just been sexually/physically assaulted. Takes the girl to a crisis center and meta textually is definitely taking the situation to heart bc of her own unresolved trauma which oooof

Crisis worker offers to take her on as a client which 🥺🥺🥺 (name’s Dr Evelyn Rosen, note for future randy to WRITE SOME FIC ABT THIS ACTUALLY)

at first Helena going to therapy seems like a ruse just to jacks the doc’s notebook to find out the gang’s hideout and exact VENGEANCE for the girl mentioned earlier, but later issues we see she’s still regularly attending therapy which!!!!!!!! amazing!!! wish we’d see MORE of that kinda thing for these heroes tbh!!!!

there’s a hero who steps in during this arc calling himself the Waterfront Warrior. he steals a spotlight but also the credit for stopping some gang violence, which Helena is Big Mad abt aksjks like girl do u want to be in the shadows or NOT MAKE UP UR MIND AKSJ

(He turns out to be Helena’s landlord but he’s also got a Tragic Backstory™️ and genuinely wants to Do Right by his renters and by his neighborhood just 🥺🥺🥺)

Arc ends with uplifting note abt doing what you can and it just wow. Can’t wait to see how Bruce ruins this alsjaksjsj 

Batman comin to HELENAS city and she is having NONE of it. OH HOW THE TURNTABLES

okay, read thru this all VERY quickly, some stuff to note is that the kid whose family was killed by one of the gangs last arc that i finished was the one driving part of the plot for this final arc. Helena’s kinda??? implied to be taking him in too???

she’s also framed as being much more victim-focused/empathetic compared to bruce in this story which... hmm

there’s THIS panel which is gonna live in my brain and which REALLY wants me to meta abt bc okay hear me out...

(Context jic its not obvs but also bc i forgot to screenshot the panel before it, but she essentially said something along the lines of “i was half expecting (batman) to say...”)

At this point, Tim’s just starting to find his footing as the new Robin in replacing Jay, so like... Similarly............... Helena could kinda be seen as like.... Taking Babs’ place. Not in a COMPLETE 1 to 1 ofc, but still just!!!! idk!!!! knowing that Babs would’ve been finding her footing during this time period as Oracle... Knowing that they’re similar enough in age here (w/ Helena essentially being an early 20-something taking An Extended Gap Year from college, and Babs’ implied to be around this same age)

idk!!! i like the idea of them having contention outside of them??? (supposedly bc i havent read it myself just yet) having beef bc of Mutual Love Interest in Dick which??? that shits always so boring goddamn.

and esp knowing that obvsly in NML helena just straight up takes the Bat-symbol on bc Batman is MIA just!!!!

idk!!! idk!!! its weird!!!!!! but also im gonna be thinking abt this alot now actually!!!

[markusstraya]

Slow You Down

MASTERLIST | Support Me!

Pairing(s): 11th!Doctor x Insecure!Reader, Amy Pond x Rory Williams, Amy Pond x 11th!Doctor (Platonic)

Warning(s): Lying, Injury, Not sure what else

Word Count: 1296

Summary: One of your old injuries returns, and you’ll do everything to keep the Doctor from finding out. It’s not until you meet a certain Amy Pond, that you admit, out loud, how you feel.

Request(s): Anon -> Hi could you maybe do a 11dr x shy reader maybe the reader is really shy and insecure bc they have a limp/walking disability and thinks they’re ugly and unlovable and a burden and somehow the dr finds out and gets all protective and proves them wrong and it’s just really fluffy I could really use something like that thanks anyway Xx

Authors Note: So this took a while to write. I’m sorry. I really am. I was telling myself to get it done ages ago, but I just lost interest, and writers' block hit not long after. It wasn't until yesterday when I went to a family friends’ book signing, and I listened to her inspiring speech, that I realized I could do this. So here it is. I’ll be attempting to write out as many requested fics as possible today, with my goal to have started all of them.

Please remember that this is my first time writing for Doctor Who, so bear with me. I’ll also like to accept any constructive criticism! Let me know if you want to be tagged in anything!

It had been another successful adventure to another random planet with the Doctor. Thankfully, you didn’t have to run as much this time, as hiding your limp had become more and more difficult due to the rigorous exercise you both participated in on the daily. As you walked through the TARDIS doors the Doctor races in front of you, and you smile, watching him dash around the control panels. He flicked switches and pressed buttons in a silent race against himself. Silently, you chuckled. You always loved to watch how he would hurriedly run around like a mad man, even though he was, as he tried to fly the TARDIS by himself. Suddenly, the TARDIS rocked, which knocked you off your feet. Your arm darted out to grasp onto something, anything. You’d managed to grab onto the cold railing, which you’d meant to do before the Doctor had sent the TARDIS into motion. Before you knew it, the ship stabalised, all movement ceasing. You let out a shaky breath, hoping that the sudden movement didn’t cause your injury to flare up.

“(Y/N)?” You could see the Doctor looking worried as he searched for you. You raised your hand, as you began to sit yourself up. “Oh, there you are! Are you alright?” You nod while he grasps your small hand in his large one, as he helped you back to your feet.

“Thanks.” You thought your leg was fine, but as you take a step forward, you can only to pull it off the ground as you hissed in pain. Great. It just had to get worse. You could hear the Doctor walk towards you again, a concerned look on his face. His green eyes scanned you as his hands grasped your upper arms. “What’s wrong? (Y/N), are you sure you’re okay?” You sighed as you shake your head. Your brain searches for the easiest way to tell him what happened all those years ago, but you blame it on your fall.  “I must have hurt it when I fell. It was-it was fine before.” Not a complete lie, but not the whole truth either. He raised a brow at my theory but accepted it anyway. I knew it was only a matter of time before he figured it out.

“Well, in the meantime, I propose that we go see some old friends of mine.” Now it was your turn to question his antics. As he noticed your look of confusion, he exclaimed, “We’re going to visit the Pond’s!”

 --

 Your arm wrapped around his shoulders, as he helped you out of the TARDIS leading you to the house ahead. You’ve never admitted it to yourself before, but you loved being this close to him. You swore you could feel a cluster of butterflies as they flapped their wings in your chest. You were just being ridiculous. A 900 plus-year-old alien falling for you? Nonsense! You couldn’t even attract any human men, let alone a Time-Lord. Still, one could hope.

The door ahead had swung open, the force had it swung into the wall, as two figures ran out. A man and a woman. The Pond’s, you supposed. “Doctor! Doctor, you’re back!” The woman shouted in her unmistakable Scottish accent as she shoved me out of the way to give him the biggest hug you’ve ever seen. The man, who had initially run out with her, had grabbed you in time, holding you steady as you recovered, smiling apologetically. “Ah, yes,” The Doctor’s voice had everyone’s attention focused on him, “Amy, Rory, this is (Y/N). (Y/N), this is Amy and Rory…the Pond’s!” You smiled as best as you could through the pain that began to shoot up your leg, as you waved slightly.

The pair led you both back to the house as the Doctor had moved back his previous position as he helped you to walk. “So, what’s the story with you two showing up out of nowhere? I mean, you,” She pointed to the Doctor, “Haven’t visited in three years.” You could see how uncomfortable he looked. He always hated to have to come back into the lives of those he traveled with, you knew that. Nervously, he focused on straightening his bow tie, obviously lost in thought about how to answer, when you spoke instead.

“I’d injured myself on the TARDIS after it had one of its weird episodes, so the Doctor thought that it would be a clever idea to have a short break and come visit you two.” You glanced over at him and gave him a wink. I’ve got your back. Rory had decided to busy himself with other, more important things, as he excused himself from the room, whilst his wife just stood and looked between us. “How bad is the injury?”

“Not bad, I just hurt my-“

“She hurt her leg pretty bad. She hasn’t been able to put any pressure on it. I’ve had to help her walk around.” Just spill the beans, why don’t ya? Her head turned to face me, her eyes scanned my legs as though she could see through my initial lie of it is because of the TARDIS. She gestured for us to head into, what I assumed, was a spare bedroom, where the Doctor helped me sit on the edge of the bed. It was kind of funny to watch him being unsure of what to do. I could tell he wanted to pace, to try and think of a way to help. But I also knew that he wouldn’t be able to.

“Okay, Doctor, I think it’s best if you leave while I see how bad it is. Go to the park or something, we have this covered.” He didn’t look convinced. Looking behind Amy, his eyes caught yours in a silent question. Are you sure you’re going to be alright? You nodded as you put your thumbs up, adding a smile for reassurance. He turned to walk out the door, before he again made sure that you were fine, only leaving with a promise to be back shortly. You shook your head at his antics.

“So, you going to tell me what the issue with this leg is?” Sighing, you patted the spot next to you, beginning your tale as Amy sat down and comforted you.

 --

 It had taken you a total of thirty minutes to re-tell the story and answer Amy’s questions, although you had to admit, it was nice to have it off your chest. She’d left shortly after having comforted you, saying something about cooking dinner for the four of you. You lay on the bed, eyes closed, as you think back to what she’d said about telling the Doctor when the door creaks open. “You could have told me, you know?” You sit up in panic, eyes locked onto the Doctor’s as he steps forward.

“And you could have minded your own business.”

The room went silent, as you both considered the others’ words. He fiddled with his tie,  before he sat on the edge of the quilt-covered mattress, lost for words. You sighed as you take a deep breath, and start again.

“I’m sorry for not telling you, I just…” he looks up at you, hands coming to rest at his sides, “I just don’t want to feel like a burden.”

Eyes widening in shock, he leans forward and grasps your hands. “You, my dear (Y/N), will never be a burden. You understand?” Shaking your head, he gathers you in his arms, hugging you tightly. “You’re the only one who understands what being different is like, you know? We’re all different. Some of us more than others, and that is a good thing. You are a good thing.”

Tag List (Forever):

@theonegirlunderyourbed @jemjem-chan  @reading-in-moonlight

Apologies if tags don’t work!

[dalissy]

Born to blossom : an unfinished KaiAo draft

Apparently I am a pro at beginning KaiAo fanfics and never finish them. Oh well. Have this trash anyway. I know I should really stop writing in English but the French DCMK fandom is a nightmare, so... nah.

Based on a prompt in which Aoko gets rejected by Kaito (bc he wants to end it with Pandora and Kid before accepting her feelings) and *eventually* falls in love with Kid instead.

Born to blossom

Tears cold as ice rolled down her cheeks, painfully irrigated by her fierce hot blood. Wind swirled around her, infiltrating her poorly covered skin and rolling her in a transparent blanket at the same time. The people passing near by, the eternal city's lights and sounds were assaulting her eyes and ears. She ignored it all.

I'm sorry, Aoko. But...

"Don't say it", she begged, bitting her lip as the memory began appearing again in her confused brain. "Please, don't say it."

I can't answer...

Her knees against her chest, like a wall against the entire world. The fabric of her skirt in her clenched fist, tighting it up like it was about to be torn apart.

...To your feelings.

An ugly cry came out of her throat.

It was not fair. But it was not like it had ever been in the first place.

In front of the big clock, her body as tiny as an ant compared to it, Aoko was weeping. She did not want to cry. Did it really deserve her tears? It wouldn't change anything anyway, no matter how many of them were falling to the cold ground, in this lonely night.

She had always been afraid to be alone, especially in the dark -even though this last part was more a childish fear than rationnal issue. But something was scarier than these.

She could not remember how she got here. She could only remember Kaito's rejection and sorrowful expression, on the path home.

Did she run away, naturally followed the way to come back to the place they met as if it would rewind time? Was she so desperate not to see him anymore, she refused to go home? She could not tell.

She merely had her school uniform on her. No bag. No phone. No even a single yen.

Even if she wanted, she could not go home. Her father would worry sick... if only he knew.

"Ah, who am I kidding?" She bitterly laughed, desperatly trying to wipe her non-stopping tears. "Tonight's Kid's heist... Dad's too busy to worry... about m...me..."

She wanted to laugh. It only hurt her already painful heart more. She buried her face into her knees.

Disappear. Disappear. She only wanted to disappear from this world where she failed her best friend, trying to confess childish feelings before their paths would definitely separate after their last year of high school, where her parents were stolen from her, one by a job where everyone made fun of him despite his restless efforts, another by unfair destiny. Where the man she hated the most in the universe was loved by the entire population.

"Vanish", she wished to herself as she tapped upon her cheeks. "Vanish! Nobody will miss you, anyway...!"

"I'd gladly grant this wish, Miss; but a true magician cannot make such a sad will come true."

Her heart jumped, her eyes widened as this one last man, this one whom she thought the less to be here at such a moment, was looking down at her with a smirk.

"Kid!..."

She gasped, unable to even make an intelligible answer at first. On the other hand, he leaned down to her in his usual perfect white suit, presenting her a colourful handkerchief close to her face.

"Tears do not match your face."

He was about to wipe out her drenched cheeks, when she instantely slapped his hand and jumped upon her two legs.

"Don't touch me! EVERYONE! HE'S HERE!" she screamed. "THE REAL KID'S HERE!"

She expected the near crowd to run to her, making her able to find a phone and call the police ; but her yell met nothing but silence and emptiness.

"...Eh?"

No one. There was no one anymore. The street was desertic. The people. The lights. The sounds.

Everything had disappeared. Only the faint noise of the wind remained.

"...How..."

"You wanted to disappear from this world." Kid calmly smiled. "But I couldn't answer to your wish; and when confronted to a problem, turn it upside down..."

"...You made the world disappear?"

If she could see his eyes underneath his hat and monocle, she would undeniably see a malicious glimmering in them while he nodded.

"That's not--"

"Possible? Nothing's impossible to me. I thought you'd come to notice it, being the daughter's inspector..."

She frowned. Would he be toying with her for no reason?

"What do you want? You should be at your heist. If this is about the time we got trapped together... I don't really consider I own you anything."

"Even though I saved you? Twice?"

The images of him grasping her so she wouldn't get impaled by the trap's 'punishment', and sweating while she realized he got projected on the broken glass to protect her, flashed through her mind. She was, of course, grateful for that. But they'd never had gotten into such a situation if he never stole in the first place.

"I did not ask you to do so." She protested, her hands firmly on her hips despite tears still running down her face.

A slight silence infiltrated the air. Aoko wished she could ignore him, escape him, go home. But if she did, he would see how trembling her whole body was -and it was a sign of weakness she did not want to show to this man.

He eventually laughed, his lips twisting in a way... so familiar.

"Is this because your phone recorded when I said I had to strip you down to exchange our clothes?"

Her eyes opened widely. No, he could not!...  Her father took immediatly her phone afterward as a proof object, and he promised they would go over that--

"You are horrible! Pervert!"

"It was a necessary sacrifice I was willing to make", he smirked very proudly. "And you are right, you don't own me anything. I, myself, have no regrets about acting as I did."

She frowned. Which part of it was a 'sacrifice'? Was it a way to say he didn't enjoy the view?

"You're still a jerk."

She did not say it with as much conviction as she wished she did.

"How cold-hearted, Miss."

"Whatever! Just answer me! What are you here for?! What are your reasons?!"

"Is there to be a reason?"

"Uh?..."

He dreamly glanced at the shining stars upon them, his hands in his pockets.

"I am the only man left in your life, after all. You lost your best friend -or at least you think so- with whom you shared friendship and romantic love. You lost your father -because of me, I won't lie- with whom you shared family love. There's only me left. The man you hate the most passionnatly."

She did not know what to answer. Her wrath lightly faded away. She did not even hate him that much. She did not like him, either. He just was... an anomally she wished could be gone of her life.

"...That doesn't make any sense."

A frank laugh got out of his throat again. "Feelings aren't supposed to always make sense. I think magic works that way, too. The heart has reasons which reason knows nothing of... was it?"

If only she could read into her own heart as much as he did. It was... frustrating. How could he know all of that about her, anyway? They barely talked for the few times they met. Then how come he knew exactly what was wrong?

"I should not love Kaito. I know I shouldn't" she admitted. "For my own sake. I mean, I am an ugly, flat-chested girl... just as he says. I am no match to anyone. I knew he'd reject me. I know he would. And yet... I still tried... And I... I..."

She felt liquid pearls form in her eyes again, her throat twitching at the truth she was about to tell. As useful as trying to extinguish an eternal fire.

"I ruined everything! I lost everything! Now, he will go away... And we'll lose contact, because it'd be too awkward to talk afterward... and... a-and... I'll regret it all my damn life..."

Her nails gripped her filthy uniform as she tried to not scream -she did not care about damaging it anymore. Anytime soon, it would end up in the attic, along with her high-school life memories... and the one she made with Kaito's.

It hurt. Hurt. Hurt. She had lost many friends between middle and high school -distance knew how to torn apart many friendships. But she never thought it would happen with Kaito. It wasn't even imaginable.

After they turn into adult... she thought it would change nothing. They'd still be the goofies they always have been. Forever and ever.

But everything changed, because of her stupid actions. If only the clock they were under could rewind time just a little, little earlier...

She suddenly felt something soft caressing her head. She lifted her eyes -only to see Kid patting her.

She was about to burst out in rage for a second, thinking he was mocking her -nevertheless, soon his pat became a sweet caress of his glove on her wet cheek, as soft as the feathers of a dove.

"You should not give so much credits on a man's thought, miss. Boys, exceptionnally in that age, often say things they do not mean."

"But you- you said it yourself! Now the only man left in my life is... you... Ah... ah. I always get the short end of the stick, it seems..."

"Who said it was a bad thing?"

Before she could even get a surprised expression on her face, his arms hold her tight. Tighter than she has been hugged for years. And again, so familiar...

She could feel his heartbeat, which was the only proof she had that this miraculous phantom thief was an actual human being and not a robot programmed to steal. His warmth, quickly spreading on her skin, somehow comforted her. The tears weren't heavily falling on the ground, now. She had a shoulder to cry upon.

"Nobody can see the beautiful rose you've bloomed into, can they?"

She did not answer. He simply raised his head, looked at her right in the eyes.

It was as if the blue shade of his irises could penetrate the darkness of anything the world could offer, even her own shadow. It felt like she could abandon herself to him without the slightest fear.

"But I can."

Her sapphire-alike eyes had the reflection of the full moon upon them, and the tears made them sparkled like legendary jewels. A sweet wind made her uniform and hair flutter along with his cape.

When his firm lips met hers on this strange night, she neither had the strenght or the desire to push him away anymore.

~

"OUCH! It huuurts!"

The big bump on Aoko's head was the proof of a troublesome wake up. How did she manage to hit the wall in her sleep?! She touched her forehead, a slight tear of pain stuck in her eye.

"I was in the middle of a dream here!"

She freezed. The white suit of Kid's appeared in her memory.

A dream. A dream.

It was nothing but a dream! She put a hand on her heart, sighting in pure relief.

"Oh, thank God!"

Everything made perfect sense, now. For the love of God, she did NOT kiss Kid in the most illogical way, she did not cry upon his shoulder: it was nothing but merely a trick made up by her unconscient!

"That was why he looked so much like..."

She suddenly remembered. Everything was not a creation of her mind. Yesterday... she...

She could see it so easily. Her and Kaito, on the way home. Her, with her confused words, her freezing body, trying to confess to this boy with whom she had shared most of the sweetest childhood that could ever be. Him, not understanding. Denying.

Rejecting.

I'm sorry, Aoko. I can't answer...

"...To your feelings."

The words died upon her trembling lips. Ah... so it did happened, didn't it? The memory of her running home, not even looking back at him, not even knowing if he tried to follow her, exploding in tears as soon as the door of her empty house was closed. Crying herself to sleep. Eventually falling into Morpheus' arms only because her mind could not take how desastrous and destroyed she felt.

Her unconscient just tried to comfort her. It appeared crystal clear to her now.

"Ah... I really am... pathetic."

[thebookwisher]

Anxiety Rambles fyi

This isn’t meant for anyone but me, I’m just trying to sort my brain out a little...

It took me a long time to figure out that I even *had* anxiety. Which sounds silly, but growing up I thought I was just dramatic. A little weird, a little antisocial... whatever, I was mostly happy with myself.

Ignoring the fact that I had sensory overload, was very sensitive, cried a lot, had lots of negative feelings and actions towards myself, and would have huge periods of anxiety or anxiety attacks...

The problem is that, for me, anxiety doesn’t feel like anxiety. I have been feeling super anxious all day today, and it feels like being on the edge of tears, obsessive thinking about things that are negative/unhealthy/upsetting, and that feeling when your leg falls asleep but generalized to my entire body. And this is how it will normally manifest for me on a day to day basis.

I get chest pains, hyperventilation, heart palpitations, shaking hands, dry mouth/not able to speak, etc, but those are more random and often I will feel one or more of these symptoms without any mental anxiety happening. 

I remember once, in college, I started hyperventilating and my brain was either very calm or in shock. So, I didn’t see it as a panic attack or an anxiety attack because I wasn’t panicked or anxious. 

That was freshman year, sometime not too long after that I had something similar happen but this time a stressor caused it, and I was crying and hyperventilating and it was bad. That’s when I started seeing it as an anxiety thing. (similar events had happened previously, but I didn’t even know anxiety was a thing then so)

Freshman year I thought I was depressed. I was isolated and wasn’t successfully making friends, I had finally realized how out of it I was throughout high school, and I was incredibly stressed every single day bc of what I would eventually come to see as social anxiety. I could have been depressed back then, I don’t remember it very well, but I don’t consider myself to be depressed anymore. I am a very sensitive person, and I do cry a lot -but those feelings are mostly triggered by anxiety, and I do have a few other health complications that cause me to feel pain or get sick a lot and I wold need to deal with them (and also go to a therapist eventually) before even starting to consider depression, if I would ever consider it. 

I do probably have social anxiety though, I have talked to a therapist about that. And it has run my life. it has either isolated me or made me clingy to the point where I become a burden and push people away. So, yeah, I’ve been lonely most of my life. I’m also an introvert, so I do get oversocialized and need alone time. It makes life very complicated for me. And because of that there’s no cookie cutter solution to my problems and it just relies on me being careful with myself and advocating for myself. (Although people don’t appreciate when I self-advocate so I’ve never really had a problem with self-advocating, I just need to learn how to do it in a way that is sensitive)

It’s taken me a long time to figure this out, because of the fact that I’ve had anxiety issues since I was 6 or 7. I’ve had phobias to some degree since I was 8 or 10 (idk), it was normal for me to always be on edge. I unlearned how to relax or feel comfortable at a very early age, and I’ve only realized that over the last few years.

If anyone does read this and wants to comment “go to therapy”... don’t. I am planning on going to therapy when I get back to school, to give it another full try before I’m who knows where. 

If anyone did read this, thank you. You’re a fabulous person for reading all of my thoughts about my mental health, I just needed to finally get this out. 

[angrybelieverconnoisseur-blog]

life insurance quote bc

"life insurance quote bc

life insurance quote bc

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life insurance quote bc

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life insurance quote bc

life insurance quote bc

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life insurance quote bc

life insurance quote bc

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Cheap car & insurance for young male driver? My brother is 23. He has passed his licence 2 years ago and his pass plus 1 1/2 years ago. He's still struggling to find a car & insurance that he can afford. He's not fussy about the type of car so long as it's not a girls car (ie chiqichenco). The insurance can be third party etc. He has a budget of 400 for the car, what should he buy? The insurance quotes so far for various 1.0l-1.3l cars have all been over 1000 which is out of his price range. Any help would be greatly appreciated. xxx""

Car Insurance Question..?

I don't have car insurance, but I have a driver's license. I am 16 years old living in Arkansas and I don't drive much. My parents have insurance and when they added me to the policy (of 2 cars), it went from $150 a month to $350, which we can't afford. We cancelled that insurance (with geico) and now have esurance, where my parents pay $135 monthly (with the same coverage), without me added. Should I be added on the policy, even though I don't drive much? If I'm driving and get in an accident, can I say that I was just burrowing my dad's car? Will I be covered under him then? (since i don't have my own car) I am confused. How does this work? thanks""

What is a 1989-94 Nissan 240sx considered as?

Sports car, classic, what? I mean what would the car insurance consider it as? Serious question, mature answers please. Thanks!""

Do you think its fair that young men have to pay more for auto insurance than a women?

Do they cause more accidents or is it the insurance companies know a young man will pay more for the privilege to drive?

""I'm under GEICO in NJ. If every member of the family is insured, how much cheaper w/ safe driving course?

Three members in the family. How much cheaper will insurance get if we all take the Safe-Driving Course?

How much should my car insurance cost?

I am 16 year old girl, will be driving a two door 1995 Honda civic, and have 4.1 gpa in school.""

Auto Insurance student discount with an incomplete grade?

For the auto insurance student discount I am required to be a full time student with a 3.00 or above. This semester I took 14 units, but the last 5 units are of a class that is incomplete . On my transcript it will show the grade for the other classes as A's and the last 5 unit class as an I. Would this have an adverse effect on my auto insurance policy? I am still a full time student with above a 3.00, but I had the grade for the class as incomplete instead of finishing it.""

Can I have two different health insurance providers?

I would like to get my medical insurance from Geisinger choice (I live in PA and know first hand they are good insurance) but I want my dental and vision from Humana. Am I allowed to mix insurance companies??

Ford mustang insurance for a 17 year old?

I wanna buy a 88-93 mustang 5.0 could I save insurance by putting it in my parents name? How does that work because if it's in my name it's gonna be pretty high.

Which car would be less for insurance?

A 2003 mustang v6 or an Infiniti g35 coupe? I'm 18 and I have a clean driving record. I have the choice of getting either one.

Is it a legal requirement to advise your car insurance company of a speeding fine?

My 24 year old son has his car insurance renewal coming up soon, and unfortunately he picked up a fixed penalty speeding fine and 3 points on his licence for this first misdemeanour he has had in 4 years of driving. With his insurance still over 1000 for a 10 year old Rover 25! he doesn't really want anything to make this cost any more (it's not as if it is a serious offence). However, I have told him it is best to advise his insurance company of this offence as if they find out in future renewal years he has withheld this information, he may be penalised worse. What's the legal standpoint on this matter? Keep schtum or confess?""

What is insurance quote?

What is insurance quote?

Insurance for new baby/family?

I'm newly pregnant - 6weeks. The boyfriend - of 5 yrs - & I were talking yesterday at my prenatal appt & he brought up insurance. The baby's due in early july 2009. He has Blue Cross Blue Shield. I have Aetna. I know that, over here in Virginia, Medicaid is completely free & they will automatically give a pregnant woman insurance thru them. I'm not sure where to go w/ insurance as far as our first baby goes. Do we keep our separate insurances & just add each other & the baby? Do we drop both & get Medicaid? Well, that would only cover me & the baby, I believe. What to do? THANKS!""

Can car insurance companies pull your insurance without notifying you?

My girlfriend is at university and just seen that her car insurance has paid a sum of money back into her bank account and after checking the dvla website it currently says her car in not insured! Can an insurance company pull the insurance without notifying her of why its been done and when it was done as the policy was taken out about a month go. Where does she stand legally too? many thanks for your help D.

Help about choosing car insurance?

I'm 18 and I need to start paying for my own car insurance. Any suggestions for lowering the cost? I live in New York which means my parents are finacially responsible for me until I'm 21. I know that everyone says to try and stick it out but that is not an option. I'm going to be living with a close friend and we need to keep our expenses to a minimum. Any tips concerning car insurance, OR health insurance too would be great.""

I'm switching car insurance and it's stressing me out?

The reason why it's stressing me out because the insurance company I had raised my insurance and I never been in an accident etc. I tried telling them I'm on a fixed income and I can't afford alot. I don't know what to do anymore I'm fed up with everything. This other insurance company asked me if I have any lapses if so then he can't give me a low rate for insurance and I never heard of that before? What is that?

Car insurance for 19 year old?

I currently drive a 2005 Mazda6 (4cyl, 140 hp sedan) and I am under my dads policy. I want to buy a 2008-09 VW GTI which is a 4cyl 200 hp turbo hatch, I want a 2 door, but will opt for the 5 door if it saves a good amount of money. How much more should I expect to pay for insurance with the GTI if on my dad's policy? Will it be cheaper to get my own? Also would waiting until I am 20 to buy the car save more money? I have never had a speeding ticket, I had one minor accident when I was 17, I have had a traffic violation last year, but I wasn't even the driver of the vehicle for the offense, also no points were added to my license for this as I did a traffic course and paid a fine instead. (florida)""

life insurance quote bc

life insurance quote bc

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/car-insurance-question-robert-williams/"

[canaryatlaw]

So, all around today was pretty good for a Monday. I really did not want to get out of bed when my alarm went off because I was tired AF, despite trying to go to sleep "earlier" (I think I ultimately turned the lights off around 12:30- it's 1 am right now 😑) and it took me 6 minutes to convince myself to get out of bed but I did it and got ready. Bus to work, checked in with my boss and she asked if I wanted to go to a CIPP with her at 10, so we left for that shortly after. She's kind of perpetually late to everything, so we were a bit late since it was a bit of a drive, and at the beginning there was this whole discussion if we should proceed without the child team specialist and they were like yeah okay let's do it, then spent half an hour talking about stuff before concluding we did need the child team specialist and having to pick another date for the end of July to do that, so basically it was a HUGE waste of time. We did get the paperwork though that we hadn't gotten before, all the info we had was that these were 4 and 5 year old siblings who had a neurological that apparently recommended residential. Residential for 4 and 5 year olds???? It's not unheard of, I've seen it before, but it's a pretty extreme measure. So I'm reading through the paperwork while they're meeting, and while these kids obviously have fairly severe behavioral problems, they're both diagnosed as on the autism spectrum and have what's considered "extremely low" IQ's (60's and 70's I think) they in no way qualify for residential, they just need a specialized placement. Ugh. So then we get back to the office and my boss has a message from the caseworker about some allegation of corporal punishment, so she had me call her back and apparently the caseworker had gone to see the kids who had said the foster moms adopted daughter hit them, when she asked the foster mom about it she balked and prompted said she wanted the kids removed. GREAT. So now they have to find another placement for them they might get removed from as soon as they get approved for specialization. Lovely. My boss asked me what I thought about separating the siblings, because there was a lot of stuff in the paperwork about them setting each other off and being aggressive and physically violent with each other, and I had mixed feelings, partially due to my own experiences with siblings. On one hand they're one of the only stable pieces of each other's lives at such a young age, but if them being together is making their behaviors worse it might be in their best interest to separate them. So I was really torn on that. But anyway, I ate lunch and then spent another hour or so in the office sending certified letters and making some other phone calls before heading back out for a meeting at 4 that we apparently underestimated the distance of, lol. Our judge is out this week so we're gonna be going into the field a lot. We ended up driving for a solid hour and a half thanks to traffic, and had to start the meeting via cell phone with me furiously taking notes in the passengers seat while my boss drove. Eventually we got there, it was at the dad's apartment regarding extending visits to overnights since the girl is 18 and very much wants to return home. They both said they'd be cooperative with whatever services, and it looks like a promising situation. Apparently the girl has had a lot of behavioral issues in the past but is now doing much better? So hopefully that will last. Very strange case, it apparently came in because the dad left the kids home alone while he had to go to court because they wouldn't go to school, but they weren't even that young??? Like preteen and teen, so I don't really understand why that was screened in. The dad and daughter both obviously had at least moderate cognitive delays, the dad had reportedly suffered a brain injury at some point, but overall seemed competent to take care of an 18 year old who's pretty damn independent (I mean it's not like taking care of a newborn) and I mean he can hold down a job and an apartment and drive, so that's gotta count for something. So that was ultimately productive and we agreed we'd go to the judge to ask for a change in the visiting order to include overnights. By the time we got out of there it was like 6, and my boss and I were both losing it a little just being silly, so we stopped at Dairy Queen because we felt like we deserved ice cream, so she bought me a cotton candy blizzard that was delicious, even if it probably hurt my stomach. I have my sort of period (my not really supposed to be happening because of birth control but I took the placebo pills this month because I was running out and for once it decided it wanted to bleed so here we are) so my stomach was kind of unsettled from that all day, not too crampy or unbearable thank GOD (I would've died) but enough for a decent amount of irritation. Sigh. Oh well, I should be getting more BC soon and hopefully that will end it. Anyway, my boss drove me back to the end of the blue line on the western edge of the city since we were way out west and she lives out there anyway, and we hit a decent amount of traffic so it took like an hour, but it could've been worse. So I took that up through the loop and back out to meet my bus like I do when I'm coming home from church (except I was a lot further west on the blue line to start with). I ended up getting home around 8:15, which is only slightly ridiculous haha but I wasn't too mad. Had dinner and chilled for a bit, then talked to my sister on the phone for about 15 minutes. Her boyfriend, who I disapproved of and was trying to get her to dump while I was there broke up with her a few days ago, and she wasn't too upset but I was still reassuring her the pain would of course go away with time and she'll be fine before she knows it, because that's very much her personality, and I don't doubt that she will be. Damn I love that kid so much, and it made me happy that she came to me about it. She's going to North Carolina to visit with our cousins down there tomorrow, so that should be some good time away from everything for her (including our parents, since she's apparently still fighting with our mom like crazy, I have to make sure our mom calls the therapist to set up and appointment for her). After I got off the phone with her I watched Kubo and The Two Strings with my roommate since she was home, and ohmygosh this movie was so cute!!! I loved it. By the end I was making audible squee-ing noises because I just couldn't take how adorable it was. And the story was really so well done! All around great movie, very adventurous plot and plenty of heart, I definitely recommend it to just about everybody. And yeah, after that I started getting ready for bed. This was longer than I would've liked but it's not quite yet 1:30 am so I'll take it, and I'll take as much sleep as I can get so I'll be going to do that now. Goodnight ladies and gents. Stay classy.