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ugh-yoongi · 12 days

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ex-conomics | csc

you supported seungcheol through years of being an aspiring athlete, and all you got to show for it was your undergraduate degree and an awkward, stuttered apology when he dumped you to go semi-pro. now he’s back after an injury derailed his career, and there’s only one problem: you’re the only one available to tutor him. you - 0; the universe - 1. talk about no return on investment.

⚽ pairing: choi seungcheol x f. reader ⚽ genre: exes to (lite) enemies to lovers; university au; angst, fluff ⚽ rating: while there is nothing explicit in this fic, there are two brief references to smut. while i can't stop anyone from reading this, i would prefer minors do not interact with this or any of my work. ⚽ warnings: cheol is some degree of famous, reader is a grad student/TA, mentions of an injury and coping with the aftermath of it, lots of economics talk that even i do not understand, swearing, one mention of alcohol, some misplaced jealousy, rom-com tropes, dino is kind of a loser but we love him anyway. probably a lot of other things i missed, but this is actually pretty tame for a fic of this length. ⚽ word count: 13.4k ⚽ thank you: a lot of people looked this over for me in the process and i'm sure i will forget some of them so if i do i'm sorry: @the-boy-meets-evil, @hot-soop, @highvern, and @haologram, who also gave me some wonderful ideas for the vlogs. thank you to MIT for opencourseware existing. i took microeconomics and dropped it, so i couldn't have done this without you. everyone in the discord server for helping me along the way and keeping me motivated. ⚽ author's note: i haven't posted a fic in nearly seven months, so i think it goes without saying that there are parts of this i like and a lot more i'm not 100% happy with. i'd love if this was more fleshed out and 10k longer, but i was able to write anything at all so it's good enough. this was written for the back to school with seventeen collab, hosted by @camandemstudios. thank you both for letting me participate! please make sure to check out the rest of the stories! everyone worked so hard and this collab was a ton of fun to participate in. <3

You look down at the paper. Back up at who handed it to you. Down at the paper again.

“You’ve got to be joking.”

The poor freshman kid laughs, all nerves, and even though the sound is grating, you remember what it’s like to be forced into work study. How far away graduate school seemed; how large your professors loomed over you with all their power and knowledge and credentials; how you constantly felt like the dumbest person in nearly every room you walked into for four straight years.

“Um—”

You sigh, just barely resisting the urge to slam your head onto your desk. “I—it’s fine, don’t worry about it.” Your words do little to ease Freshman’s nerves. He’s still hunched over in the doorway of your office, wringing his hands as he shifts his weight back and forth, in for a lifetime of body pain with the way he’s squaring his shoulders. “You’re sure about this, though? Like, I’m really not being set up?”

“I don’t think so?” he offers, slowly starting to turn green right before your eyes. “Dr. Lee ga-gave me the paperwork himself, I don’t think he would’ve messed it up? Oh no, did I mess it up? Should I go back to Student Services and conf—”

Good god, this kid’s anxiety is gonna stink up your office for weeks. “No need!” you interject. “I’ll just…” Sign it, you want to say, but the longer you stare at the sheet of paper the quicker you’re losing your resolve.

TUTORING REQUEST FORM Student Name: Choi Seungcheol Degree: Undergraduate Major: Business Course: ECON04101 Introduction to Microeconomics Instructor: Lee Yeonseok, PhD. Recommended Tutoring: High (3-4 hours per week)

You curse under your breath. Of the two names on the paper, Dr. Lee’s does not come as a surprise. He’s a notorious hard-ass with an infamous attrition rate—most students don’t last more than a week in any of his classes—but he’s also the sole reason you were able to pay for someof your grad school tuition out of pocket with all the tutoring money you made.

That, however, was two years ago.

“Does he know I don’t tutor anymore?” Stupid question. The kid stares blankly back at you, as if to say I don’t know any more than the people in Student Services, let alone Dr. Lee. It is literally my first year here. “I’m Dr. Ahn’s TA this year. I’ve got my hands full with her bullsh… stuff—”

Immediately, you know you’ve said something wrong, because the kid’s eyes light up, all that previous anxiety disappearing like smoke. “Wait, the same Dr. Ahn that teaches the crypto course?”

“No, that one died,” you say quickly. Kid deflates. “Anyway, I don’t really tutor anymore, especially for econ. As you can see”—you gesture vaguely around the cramped four walls of your office—“they’ve upgraded me. They even put my name on a little placard by the door! Go look! They spelled it wrong! If that doesn’t sum up this university I don’t know what does.”

You heave another sigh. Try to school your face and tone into something that exudes professionalism and finality. “Look, I’m sorry I can’t help you. I tutored Dr. Lee’s students for, like, three years in undergrad so I’m sure they just… forgot that wasn’t my actual job here. Who’s in charge of tutoring these days? I’ll shoot them an email and explain all this.”

Freshman gives you a name, and it takes less than a second to find them in the employee directory. You expect that to be the end of it, but he’s still taking up space in your doorway. You quirk an eyebrow. “Yes?”

The hand-wringing returns, along with an embarrassed flush that disappears beneath the neckline of his school-branded sweatshirt. “I just—um. Maybe you could, uh. Send that now? Before I get back there?”

You blink. “Don’t you have to go all the way back across campus? How slow do you think I type?” He shrugs, and you give up on the idea of getting rid of him. “Fine. What’s your name, anyway?”

“Lee Chan. I’m a sophomore. Do you know that guy?”

“Oh. I thought for sure you were a freshman, but you’re gonna need to be more specific, Lee Chan, Sophomore.”

“The guy they want you to tutor.” You freeze. The guy they want you to tutor is—“Choi Seungcheol,” Chan tacks on, and, yeah, you know—knew, you correct yourself—someone with that name, once upon a time.

But there are a lot of Chois and a lot of Seungcheols. It’s been years since you’ve spoken to the Seungcheol you knew, and that was when he’d broken up with you to—“I heard he’s a football player? Well, used to be, I guess. The girls in the office were freaking out so I guess he’s pretty famous, but I don’t know anything about sports, do you? They said they have photocards of him. I thought they only did that for idols.”

You think about being kids together in Daegu. Think about the exasperated looks you’d share when your parents would drag the two of you to festivals: Palgongsan in the autumn, Biseulsan in the spring; transformation and rebirth. Think about being eight years old and watching your father cram into the small space of the Chois’ living room, standing around the TV with Seungcheol’s dad, shouting at Park Jonghwan. Daegu FC made the FA Cup quarterfinals that year, and you think, of everything, that’s what you’ll remember for the rest of your life.

You think about falling in love slowly. Sixteen and clueless, the pair of you were. Didn’t really know any different, just that you’d look at him and feel butterflies. That you’d hold hands in secret. Text beneath the dinner table. That you’d watch him on the football pitch and be consumed by pride. That the future felt impossibly far away, that life would never catch up to the two of you.

You think about all the football jargon you didn’t understand—the academies, the teams, the implications. You think about, I’m thinking about trying out for the FC Seoul U-18, I just don’t think there’s much more I can do here in Daegu. You think about replying, Oh, I applied to university there.

You remember thinking it must’ve been fate, how easy that had worked out. How easy that first hurdle had been overcome.

You think about how fast everything happened. The try-out, the acceptance, the explosion. Remember being unable to go anywhere those first few months without seeing Seungcheol’s face, touted as the next big thing. Think about applying for scholarships when he was applying for international visas. Think about studying for midterms when Seungcheol was studying English for interviews.

You think about the last few weeks of your relationship, when it felt like you were desperately trying to cling to ghosts. Think about how Seoul had once felt endlessly big, both in opportunity and size, and how it now felt suffocating. You think about, So you’re just giving up? Is that what you’re saying? Think about, I don’t know what else to do. It doesn’t feel fair to you.

You think about all the places you’ve watched him. On countless football pitches; shy glances in school hallways; in the passenger seat, wracked with nerves on the drive to Seoul; poised above you in bed, hairline dotted with sweat as he rolled his hips, telling you how much he loved you.

You think about watching him walk out the door, and how you never watched him again.

So you fire off your email, concise and to the point about why you can’t tutor Choi Seungcheol in Introduction to Microeconomics, and turn to Lee Chan, Sophomore.

“No,” you finally answer. “Never heard of him.”

For all intents and purposes, your rejection should’ve been the end of it.

A few days go by. You hold office hours, attend lectures, work on your thesis when you have both the time and the energy. Try to ignore the feeling of bees beneath your skin, anxiety needling each time you check your email. You were well within your right to decline the tutoring request, but you can’t help but feel like you’ve done something wrong. That someone somehow knows who Seungcheol was to you and will pull you up on it. That those girls who’d gushed about him to Chan are somewhere laughing at your expense.

But you don’t hear anything at all about it… until you do.

Sunday evening. You haven’t moved from your couch in hours, some variety show playing in the background, barely audible over your keyboard clacking. Much to your detriment, you don’t write many papers these days, so you’re out of practice. Feels like you haven’t done anything besides formulas in years, all of your academic knowledge reduced to fucking math, so you’re about ready to toss your laptop out the window long before the email even comes through.

You see, From: Lee Yeonseok. You see, Subject: Choi Seungcheol - Tutoring.

Your stomach plummets to the floor.

You scan the body quickly. You see the words personal favor… friend of his father… urgent matter… and your hands start shaking. Whether it’s from the sheer audacity of this man or anxiety, you aren’t sure, but it’s not like it matters. There aren’t a whole lot of people on campus brave or dumb enough to go up against him twice.

“Motherfucker,” you spit, bitter the only taste in your mouth.

Where did you go wrong to wind up here? You’d followed the script: got the grades, passed the exams, received half of the required education for the Respectable Career, helped a few others along the way chase dreams that may or may not have been their own. You’d fallen in love. Only had a broken heart to show for it, but that’d been in the script, too: The First Love, followed by The First Heartbreak.

The split from Seungcheol was supposed to have been the end of that chapter. You’d planned on never seeing him again, and you never would have, had it been up to you. Apparently the universe has other plans, participation required.

“Did you spill onion dip on the rug again?” You startle, sending your laptop flying. Kaori, your roommate, is perched halfway in between the living room and the kitchen like a cryptid, clearly not expecting your reaction. “Oh. Were you watching porn?”

Face burning, you fetch your laptop from the floor. “In a common area? Kaori, please, I have far more decorum than that.”

She snorts, resuming her trek to the fridge. “See, that’s what I thought, but then I walked out here and you threw your laptop so fast it was like watching my ex get caught watching furry porn all over again.” She pries the lid off a large container of yogurt. “You think this is still good?”

“Dunno. What’s it smell like?”

She sniffs it and pulls it back to check the label. “Vanilla, I think, which is concerning because it’s supposed to be strawberry.”

You shrug. “What’s the worst that can happen, you get extra”—you pause, trying to remember the correct order of things, before giving up entirely—“...biotics?”

“Mm, so close. Care if I just eat this with a spoon?”

Nose scrunched, you wave her off. “Couldn’t pay me to eat yogurt on a good day, let alone if it’s expired. All yours, babe.”

Spoon in hand and a pleased smile on her face, Kaori collapses onto the couch beside you. You try to return your attention to your paper, try to find your momentum again, and it works for all of ten minutes before you’re groaning and slamming the top closed.

You don’t even need to look over to know Kaori’s staring. “What’s up with you?” she asks. Before she can answer: “Wait, is this serious? Because I can’t have a serious conversation in this t-shirt.” You steal a glance sideways. Ask Me About My Hemorrhoid! it says, and you exhale loudly. “Don’t breathe at me, I lost a bet.”

“And continued wearing it?”

She jokingly rolls her eyes. “God forbid a girl has hobbies.” Nudges you with her foot. “C’mon, spill.”

Kaori doesn’t know about you and Seungcheol. Most people don’t, aside from a few old classmates from Daegu who found you on social media and tried befriending you once he started making a name for himself in Seoul. After that, it was just easier to keep things private while you were together. New friends knew you were seeing someone but not their name or how long you’d been together. Any curiosity surrounding why the Choi Seungcheol was following you on Insta had been waved away easily. Our parents are friends, we grew up together. Then you broke up, and there wasn’t any evidence to delete, and he wasn’t following you on Instagram anymore, and it was easier that way.

So, yeah—even though you hadn’t met her until years later, Kaori knows you have an ex. She knows you’ve had a few flings and situationships in the time since, too, and it’s why she’s none the wiser when you ask, “It’s nothing, really. Just—do you follow football at all?”

“Nah, not really. The new guy’s pretty into it and keeps trying to get me to watch the games with him, but it’s so fucking boring? I dunno, I can’t get into it. Not in real life, anyway—I binged all of Captain Tsubasa in an embarrassingly short amount of time, though. Why?”

“Student Services asked me to tutor someone the other day and I had to turn it down. I just don’t have the time, you know? This semester’s already killer, and Dr. Ahn’s been riding my ass nonstop about grades. Turns out it’s some football player, so Dr. Lee emailed me asking me to do it as a personal favor, which means, on top of all the other shit I have to do, I’m now tutoring some football player four hours a week in Microeconomics.”

Her face distorts. “God, that guy’s such a prick. Like wow, you’re good at the economy! Good for you! Who cares! Why don’t you go balance the national debt or something instead of torturing university freshmen!”

You also wrongly assume that’s the last you’ll hear of it from Kaori.

Two days later, after Student Services replies to your email with the days and times you’ll be tutoring Seungcheol, she materializes in the living room to harass you.

“You didn’t tell me your football player was Choi Seungcheol.”

The panic is instant. You know how she means it, but it’s not how your body interprets it. All of a sudden it feels like an interrogation, an accusation, and a whopping serving of guilt takes up residence in the middle of your chest for not being entirely honest.

“Explains this weird text Ken sent me.”

She slides her phone over to you, open to her text thread with her current flavor of the week. Beneath an article about Seungcheol enrolling in classes at your school:

doesn’t ur roomie TA there Why are you calling her “ur roomie” like you don’t know her name?? Rude. Also yes. ask her to get me an autograph No babe pls he was my fav player before he got injured No 🙄 fine. can i come over later? Starting to think you’re using me for my roommate. Get your own job 🙄

You hand her phone back. “I didn’t think you’d know who Choi Seungcheol even is.” It’s the best you can do, even though it just digs you a deeper grave. “You said you’re not into football.”

“I’m not, but unfortunately I am into that stupid man.” She sighs, wistful and longing. “Babe, you have to understand. His dick is so big.”

You hadn’t wanted to stay in Seoul for your graduate degree, let alone the same university you’d gone to for undergrad.

You’d applied to schools all over—Japan, Europe, even a few in the States. Romanticized the hell out of NYU, went window shopping for an overpriced apartment, picked a favorite pizzeria based on nothing but vibes and online reviews. In those few months after graduation, there wasn’t a whole lot tying you to Seoul. Your and Seungcheol’s relationship had been old history by then, your parents split. Your dad stayed in your childhood home and your mother moved a few hours closer to her sister. They’d waited until your brother was old enough to be out of the house.

And it’d just been… a lot. Overwhelming. Some days you could barely shower or feed yourself, let alone move halfway across the world, so you’d stayed in the familiar and tried not to let it feel like failure.

But the good thing about familiarity is you learn its tricks, figure out the hiding spots. Early on, your first or second week of grad school, you laid claim to a study room on a floor of the library everyone else ignored. You write notes on the whiteboard with faded blue markers that are still there days later. The chair on the opposite side of the table is always exactly where you left it, the space between it and the table enough to only accommodate you. Sometimes you leave books—old paperbacks littered with notes in your writing—or papers, just to see if they move.

They never do.

And all of this is why it feels like a punch to the gut when that sanctity is tainted. When you’re halfway through a stack of Dr. Ahn’s exams and the doorknob rattles behind you. When you don’t even need to turn around to know who it is, because he still sounds the same, still has that overwhelming presence. You’ve always sensed him before you felt him.

“There you are,” Dr. Lee says, ambling into the room before you can protest. He, too, is overwhelming, just in different ways. Immaculate posture that anchors his slight frame that’s always dressed impeccably and expensively. Wears a watch that’s triple your tuition. Shoes polished so bright they’re nearly blinding. “I’ve been looking all over for you.”

This time it is an accusation.

Well, you found me, you want to say, but just knowing Seungcheol is behind him, lingering in that half-study room, half-hallway space, is enough to keep you quiet. Like if you speak you’ll summon him closer and you’ll no longer be able to pretend this is nothing more than a nightmare.

You plaster on a polite smile. Say, “Ah, here I am, kyosu-nim,” and put all your energy into trying to glue Seungcheol to the floor with your mind.

Which is fruitless, because Dr. Lee moves further into the room. Gestures for Seungcheol to follow him with an impatient huff, and the study room is small, sure, and with three people it feels cramped, but that’s not the reason it feels like all the air’s been sucked out of the room.

Seungcheol looks… different. He looks as anxious as you feel, and he sticks close to the wall like he’s trying to disappear. Dr. Lee introduces him with grave importance, unaware of your history, and the forced smile he offers you almost looks embarrassed.

You know Dr. Lee is still hammering away, probably giving you a stern talking-to for rejecting his request the first time, but you can’t tear your eyes away from Seungcheol. Feels like the world around you has reduced to a pinhead, all hyperfocus; feels like your lungs are sucking in stale air one at a time.

“...his father is a very good friend of mine, so I expect…”

You expected to feel nothing. Seungcheol had left to chase his dream—one you’d always been so supportive of that it sometimes felt like your dream, too—and, perhaps naively, you thought the distance and the years would’ve been enough. You expected your heart to have hardened. You expected all those nights you spent crying to hit you at full force. You expected anger, hurt—indifference, at the very least.

“...as many hours per week as you both can manage…”

But you should’ve known better. Should’ve expected the butterflies, the way your palms grow clammy, the way your heart rate spikes. Should’ve expected everything to feel upside-down. You should’ve expected to look at Seungcheol and feel sixteen and in love all over again.

“...you are responsible for his academic progress…”

And that simply will not do. You’ve spent the last few years pulling yourself out of that hole, clawing your way back to something resembling normal. You’ve purged the thought of him from your mind—let his scent fade from your sheets, an old sweatshirt he’d left behind; forgot the way his lips felt against every inch of your skin; forgot the way his entire being lit up when he laughed; forgot the safety he encompassed, the way he whispered all those sweet nothings.

You cannot go there again.

So you roll your shoulders back, smile politely. Say, “Ah, kyosu-nim, Choi Seungcheol-ssi seems very intelligent, I’m sure he is capable of being responsible for his own academic standing, don’t you think?”

Dr. Lee cannot disagree without all but calling Seungcheol an idiot, so he hovers before you in shocked silence. Makes a show of huffing and checking his watch, like he’s all of a sudden remembered he’s late for something and being inconvenienced by this conversation he started, and then he’s halfway out of the library with a terse, “Discuss and figure this out amongst yourselves,” thrown over his shoulder.

You have an entire dramatic exit planned in your head. Gather your things, fake a phone call that makes you sound authoritative and important, and brush past Seungcheol wearing your nicest perfume as if all of this is so far beneath you you can’t even bring yourself to care about it.

Of course, you actually have to brush by him for any of that to happen, and since you’ve already decided you will not go there again, you quickly scribble your email address onto a piece of paper and slide it across the table at Seungcheol, who has steadfastly remained planted just outside the door. “Here’s my email. I don’t have time to discuss this right now.” Seungcheol cocks an eyebrow. You start throwing things into your bag haphazardly. You know you look frantic and affected, but there’s not much you can do about that. “What? Send me a copy of your syllabus and what you want to prioritize. It’ll be easier to get through this if we have a plan instead of winging it.”

He seems to catch on to your distaste because he mirrors it. Scoffs as he rolls his eyes and says, “Yeah, no use spending more time together than we have to,” and if you hadn’t gone years without speaking, you would’ve seen right through it.

But you did, so it stings all the same.

As it typically does, the planet keeps spinning after your run-in with Seungcheol.

You grade Dr. Ahn’s coursework. Try running off your anxiety at the gym, even though it’s pretty good at keeping pace with you these days. You meet Kaori’s maybe-boyfriend sneaking out of your apartment early in the morning and he has the good sense not to mention your ex, but you chalk that up to the mess of hickeys covering his neck and not any sense of social decorum.

Other people’s embarrassment saves you a ton of your own, you’ve come to learn.

Throughout all of this, Seungcheol only emails you once to send you his course syllabus. Doesn’t mention tutoring or provide you with his schedule or ask for yours, so when you’re sitting in a bar with your friends, three or four drinks deep and feeling a little petty, you forward him the original tutoring request and make sure to bold, underline, and highlight the “Recommended Tutoring: High” part for good measure.

He doesn’t take your bait—electronically, at least—but he does show up to your office hours the following Tuesday.

Bag tossed onto the floor, he flops unceremoniously into the chair across from you and says, in lieu of a greeting, “They spelled your name wrong. On the door thing.”

“I know,” you reply, your smile polite and terse. Incredible how he has the ability to raise your blood pressure in milliseconds. “What can I help you with?”

“Depends. How long do you have?”

“Well, considering you’ve shown up to my office hours on time, I’m assuming you already know I’m here every Tuesday and Thursday from four to six. So”—you glance at the clock above the door—“assuming no one comes by who needs my help more than you do, you have approximately one hour and fifty-eight minutes.”

Seungcheol is quiet for a moment as he takes you in. His stare is weighted; it makes you feel a little green around the edges. Clinical and sharp, so far removed from the way he used to look at you. You clear your throat. “I looked over your syllabus. The good news is there’s only a midterm and a final and the rest is problem sets. The bad news is there’s only a midterm and a final so they’re weighted quite heavily. You really need to know this stuff inside-out to have any hope of passing.”

“That’s why you’re here, right? Dr. Lee specifically requested you.”

You huff a breath through your nose. “I’m here as supplemental help. I can’t take your exams or do your readings for you. What else are you taking this semester?”

He sighs, sinking further into the chair, very much playing the part of the heir who has no interest in any of this. Which… is unlike him, you think, if you’re even allowed to. The Seungcheol you knew years ago took everything so seriously. Never clipped corners or took shortcuts. Anyone else would think him a spoiled, petulant child. “Business Accounting and International Trade.”

“Could be worse,” you note. “At least those three courses are tangentially related.”

Seungcheol rolls his eyes. “Easy for you to say. I haven’t taken a fucking math class in years.”

You return it. “You remember how to add and subtract, don’t you?”

“I ruptured my ACL, not my…” He trails off, looking a little embarrassed that he can’t name a part of the—“Brain.”

Whatever you were going to quip back with dies on your tongue. It's the first time Seungcheol has broached the topic of his injury—the first you’re hearing of it at all, actually—and he says it like it’s a joke, like it’s not a thing at all, but the pain is all over his face. The bitterness of the situation he’s found himself in. The unfairness of it all.

And there are so many questions you want to ask that aren’t your place: if it’s fixable, if he’ll ever play again, how he’s coping. But you don’t really need to—you can’t imagine how you’d feel if someone suddenly pulled the rug out from under you. If everything contained within the four walls of your office suddenly disappeared.

Not that the man sitting across from you hadn’t already done that, but.

“Right,” you continue, as if he hadn’t said anything at all. You know Seungcheol—know he wouldn’t want you prodding, sticking your fingers in that particular wound. “I want you to take a look at this,” you say, handing over a printout you have saved from your undergrad tutoring days. “Tell me what looks familiar, what doesn’t; what does and doesn’t make sense.”

He looks down at the paper. Back up at you. Down at the paper again. “What the fuck is this?”

“I—what? Cheol, it’s my old notes on recitation. Surely you’ve already covered this—the syllabus says this is week one stuff.” He looks down at the paper again, and it’s so familiar, watching the life drain entirely from someone’s eyes.

You barely resist the urge to slam your face onto your desk a second time.

You meet Seungcheol at the sports center for your next tutoring session.

He likes the humidity and the smell of the chlorine by the pool. He also likes that it’s not the football pitch, so the two of you sit in the bleachers there and go over his lecture notes. Much to your surprise, Seungcheol talks a mile a minute. Has stars in his eyes when he says he finally understands elastic demand curves, supply shock; tells you he spent a whole hour making flashcards.

It’s the first time you’ve seen him so excited since your tutoring began—the first glimmer of hope you’ve felt since Dr. Lee cornered you in your library hideaway. None of this surprises you. Seungcheol has always been smart, even when football was his primary (and sometimes only) focus. He has more determination and grit than anyone you’ve ever met, so you’re not surprised he’s doing well, excelling, but you are surprised—

“Can I ask you something?” Seungcheol shrugs, shoves half a protein bar in his mouth and swallows without chewing. “Why are you… uh. Here?”

“At this university?”

“Not exactly. I mean, I am wondering about that, but I guess… why business?”

Seungcheol hums. Tucks his good knee to his chest and stares down at the pool. No one’s using it, and truthfully the two of you probably aren’t even allowed to be here, but you understand why he likes it. It’s nowhere near as secluded as the library and definitely not as air conditioned, but it is peaceful. Calm. The water laps against the coping in quiet, small waves.

“Ah, I don’t know. You know how it goes.”

You quirk an eyebrow. Never, in all the years you’ve known him, has Seungcheol done anything he didn’t want to do. All that grit and determination. “What about your father, then? Dr. Lee mentioned this was a favor to him. He’s a pretty important person to have in your Rolodex of favors.”

Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see what this is: Seungcheol’s father has new money; worked from the bottom up, made some smart investment decisions that finally panned out after Seungcheol left for Seoul. Started doing his own thing, made a name for himself. Last you’d heard from your mother, Seungcheol’s brother was second-in-command. Hell, even your own brother did an internship there.

So you know what this is: a father helping his son after his dream was shattered, life turned upside-down. You can’t blame him, even if you’ve heard the whispers from all the way across campus. That Seungcheol is washed up now, trying to nepo his way into his father’s company because of it; that all he knows is sports and he should’ve stuck to that, what does he know about business, why is he the one Dr. Lee went out of his way to help.

Doesn’t stop any of them from smiling at him, though; doesn’t stop them from asking for autographs or selfies.

But you also know this isn’t something Seungcheol seems willing to discuss, so you crack a joke—“I mean, business. God, who’d wanna go into that?”—and go back to what he was willing to talk about.

You’ve never hated elastic demand curves so much in your life.

Deep in the throes of tutoring—when you can’t tell if it’s week two or week twelve—you make it back to your apartment just before ten, head pounding.

The door flies open just as you’re about to punch in the code, and there stands Ken, looking far more put-off than you’ve ever seen him. Looks defeated, if you’re being honest, like someone mopped up all his emotions and wrung them out like dirty dishwater.

“Oh, hi,” you say hesitantly. The man in front of you seems too much like a caged animal to let your guard down. “Everything okay?”

He aborts a nod halfway. Mutters an apology as he brushes by you and stalks down the hall, disappearing around the corner to the elevators. Usually he’s a talker—you haven’t been able to avoid a Seungcheol-related conversation in weeks—so you’re a little stunned. Stand there stupidly for a while, and that’s where Kaori finds you a moment later.

“You gonna stand out here all night, or…?”

“Oh—yeah, right.”

You follow her inside. Toe off your shoes and put them in the rack. Focus on the sound of the kettle whistling instead of the overbearing tension in the room. Drop your bag off in your room, throw on a sweatshirt three sizes too big and a comfy pair of socks. Rummage through the fridge for leftovers, contemplate what mindless show you’ll watch as you eat, and you do not, under any circumstances, ask Kaori what happened.

You don’t have to. You knew what this was going to be the first time Ken spent the night—the way he looked mortified to be meeting you in the shared kitchen at seven a.m., wearing a look that begged you not to tell your roommate he was sneaking out.

I, uh, have an early class, he’d said. You know how it is.

Maybe you should’ve called him on it then. Issued a warning-but-not-really. She’ll get attached if you don’t tell her. She should know it’s different for you, if it is.

But you’d convinced yourself it wasn’t your place. Kaori wouldn’t want you in her business like that, so you stayed quiet, just nodded before watching him slip his shoes on and close the door behind him so quietly you wouldn’t have known he left at all if you hadn’t been looking. Gone, just like a ghost.

So, yeah, you know exactly why your roommate looks haunted.

“I’m a few episodes behind on this if you want to watch with me,” you offer, pointing at the television with the remote. It’s a lie—you’ve never watched this show a day in your life, which Kaori seems to know—but she contemplates it nonetheless. “Also, my mom mailed us some cookies. I think they’re in the fridge.”

“Why are there cookies in the fridge?”

You huff a laugh. “They were outside the door this morning before I left for campus. I don’t know—just saw who the package was from and was like, oh, this must go in the fridge.”

She nods. Grabs the container and joins you on the couch. Sticks her feet beneath your butt and doesn’t mention a thing.

The closest she comes is a few days later. Catches you right before you head out to campus and asks how tutoring is going.

“Not bad, actually.”

Her smile doesn’t reach her eyes when she says, “That’s good. I’m glad things are going well for you two.”

Lee Chan, Sophomore makes his unexpected return at your office hours on an unsuspecting Tuesday.

“Can I help you?”

He doesn’t answer right away, just helps himself to the seat across from you. “Maybe,” comes his cryptic retort. “I was thinking about signing up for that crypto course next semester.”

You narrow your eyes. “No, you weren’t.”

He sighs. Looks a little panicked, like he can’t believe that didn’t work. “You’re right, you’re right. I, um—I wanted to come say thank you.” He pauses. “You know, for that… email you sent.”

You blink. “No, you didn’t.”

Lee Chan, Sophomore cracks immediately. Thunks his head on your desk and lets loose a pained sound. It nearly sounds like he’s wailing when he says, “I’m sorry! They put me up to it!”

What you’re able to piece together is this: Lee Chan, Sophomore has become a bit of a celebrity in the Student Services department ever since he met you, Choi Seungcheol’s tutor. And, like any smart, previously unpopular university student would do, he took advantage of it. Might’ve stretched the truth a little to make it sound like he knew more than he did, so now here he is, angling for information the girls with the photocards may or may not have paid him to get.

“They want to know about his girlfriend.”

“His what?”

What you’re able to piece together is also this: the Photocard Girls are certain Seungcheol is dating someone, based on little more than vibes. You suspect these vibes are their three degrees of separation, considering there was an abnormal amount of Change of Major files formed after his enrollment, but you tell Lee Chan that you don’t know anything and, even if you did, you wouldn’t put his business out there like that.

But some part of you still has this inexplicable urge to protect Seungcheol, so you match their offer with interest and tell him to say there’s nothing to report—not that you didn’t know, not that he couldn’t get anything out of you. Seungcheol isn’t dating anyone.

You don’t know if it’s true, but you figure that if it isn’t, he still deserves privacy.

Which is a notion you have trouble explaining a few hours later, when Seungcheol strolls into your office with a grease-stained paper bag full of cheese coin bread, offering one to you with a proud smile that drops slowly when you just stare in return.

“What’s wrong?”

Your mouth opens, closes, opens again. Nothing comes out, even though it should be simple. Some sophomore kid was just in here angling for information or the Student Services department is taking bets on whether or not you have a girlfriend would both suffice, but you cannot bring yourself to say the words.

What you settle on is, “Sorry, I just… had an interesting meeting before you got here.”

“Oh. Are you okay?”

You sigh. Tilt your head back to stare up at the ceiling. “It was about you, actually.”

Seungcheol chokes, starts stuttering over words you can’t make sense of. Says, “Me? Why? I passed my last exam—I mean, barely, but I still passed. And that wasn’t your fault! I didn’t study enough! I’ve been losing my mind over my International Trade class, that shit sucks—”

“It wasn’t about your grades, Cheol.”

“Oh.” Then, slowly, a lopsided, pleased smile overtakes his face. “Haven’t heard you call me Cheol in a while.”

“Seungcheol,” you correct.

He seems to forget all about the meeting. Tries again to offer you a coin bread before he threatens to eat them all himself, so you acquiesce mostly to shut him up, say you’ll bring the extras to Kaori. For some reason, you tell him about how much she’d loved the cookies your mom sent, and the nostalgia sets him off, gets him talking again, asking if they were the yakgwa she used to make when you two were kids.

They were, but you can’t seem to tell him that, either.

Seungcheol: sorry it’s last minute - running late. can you meet me at my place instead?

Seungcheol shared a location with you

You’re halfway to replying—I don’t think that’s appropriate—before you sigh and delete it. Midterms are only a few days away and you don’t have time to argue over where your tutoring sessions will be, so if Seungcheol wants to meet at his apartment that’s where you’ll meet him.

You read over the midterm notes on the train. Once, twice, and then a hundred more times until they’re nearly memorized, all so you can ignore the voice in the back of your head saying what a bad idea this is. That you have no business being on your way to your ex’s swanky part of town or integrating yourself into his life beyond tutoring at all. You shouldn’t know where he lives. Maybe you shouldn’t even have his phone number or answer his texts.

Not that there’s much you can do about it now, two stops away.

Seungcheol greets you warmly, if not a little rushed. Apologizes for the mess once you step inside, although it’s less “mess” and more “haven’t finished unpacking,” but there’s enough clear space to study at the dining table, so that’s where you set up, determined to keep things professional.

“Sorry again about this,” Seungcheol says, placing a can of cola in front of you as he takes the seat across. “I had to meet with my father and lost track of time, I guess.”

“Oh. How’s he doing?”

Seungcheol sighs, leans further back in the chair as runs a hand through his hair. A light brown, now. “Same as he always was, I guess. Talked about the business, about my brother. Can’t get him to shut up about that stuff most of the time.”

“The business is doing good, though.” You cough, clear your throat. “My, uh. My brother interned there during undergrad. I don’t know if your father told you that.”

You don’t know why you say it, because it’s clear from the brief flicker of pain on Seungcheol’s face that he hadn’t known, that no one had told him. And it hurts you too that they felt the need to keep it a secret, to protect Seungcheol from you even in tangential ways.

“He didn’t,” he admits, “but I’m sure he was happy to see him. He was, uh—he was glad to hear you’re my tutor. Said you were always smarter than all of us boys combined.”

You laugh. Hope it sounds casual instead of strained. “Well, no need to prove him right. Come on,” you say, tossing a study guide in his direction, “let’s get to work.”

Everything is alright for a while—nearly an hour at least. He has the formulas memorized and attributed to the correct equations. He can explain supply and demand, preference and utility, but things start to fall apart around budget constraints and constrained choice.

The formulas get mixed up. He grows frustrated when he doesn’t know the answers to your questions right away. Rolls his eyes and gets a little snappy when you correct him, try to explain things differently in a way he understands. At first he’s able to temper it, collect himself before things truly start spiraling out of control, but the longer the two of you sit there the more it all unravels.

He snaps, you snap back, and you can’t figure out why. You’ve survived this long in Seungcheol’s orbit even though you never thought you’d be around him again, and perhaps it was bound to explode eventually, but…

It’s the familiarity, you realize.

You and Seungcheol aren’t friends, though you’ve been playing at it for weeks now: meeting outside of the library or your office, the personal conversations bordering on reminiscing, being in his personal space. You don’t belong here. You don’t want to be his friend—you can’t be, not for real or pretend.

“That’s not what I’m say—”

“Then explain it better,” Seungcheol fires at you, eyebrows creasing. “You’re the tutor here.”

You roll your eyes. “I’m trying, okay? All I meant was—your answer isn’t wrong, but I know Dr. Lee and he’s going to want more than that in a response.”

“Right—not good enough, like I said.”

“I’m just asking you to expand on your answer—”

“And I’m telling you that’s all I’ve got. I’m not like you, all right? I don’t have all this shit just floating around in my head all the time. I’m not smart, I barely have any idea what’s going on half the time, and you sitting here being condescending about it is doing fuck-all to help.”

You inhale sharply, taken aback at the hostility in his voice. Suggest calling it for the night, say neither of you will be productive if you keep going like this, and neither of you bother to apologize.

So much of your relationship with Seungcheol was marred by clichés.

The two of you passing notes back and forth during class. You in the bleachers of all his games, screaming along to the team chants, waving a sign around with his name on it. Not realizing you had a crush on him at all until he liked someone else and it made your stomach hurt. Childhood friends turned lovers.

Another cliché: that it’s starting to feel like that all over again.

Seungcheol sits across from you in the library, econ textbook cracked in half in front of him as he pays no attention. Keeps grabbing his phone each time it vibrates across the table. Can’t fight the smile that forces its way onto his face when he reads whatever’s there.

Stupid, you think—both to do this and to think it’d play out any other way. Seungcheol left years ago. Probably lived ten lifetimes while he was away while you were here in this exact spot doing this exact thing. Barely lived half a life, just stuck your nose in textbooks and forced your way through.

“Cheol,” you say, trying to drag his attention back to the study guide. No use. He’s typing away, presses his tongue into the fat of his cheek as he responds. “Seungcheol,” you try again.

Also fruitless.

You have no claim here, you remind yourself—not to his time, not to him. He’s only here because someone else mandated it. You’re only here because someone else mandated it, but it stings all the same. Another reminder of what used to be, of what ended regardless of what you wanted. Another reminder that the role you used to play in his life is not the role you play now. That the space you used to take up created a vacancy, and eventually it was going to be filled.

And if this was anyone other than Seungcheol, if you were more emotionally evolved when it came to him, it wouldn’t gnaw at you as much. All of this would roll off your shoulders.

But it isn’t, and you’re not.

“If you’re not going to listen, then—”

“I am listening,” he interjects, but he’s not looking at you. Not looking at his textbook or his study guide. Keeps laughing and smiling at his phone, and it’s sick how bothered you are by it. That it feels like your stomach’s been turned inside-out with jealousy; with annoyance, because you don’t want to be here anyway, don’t want to do this anymore, and you’re wasting your time on someone who doesn’t appreciate it.

Perhaps he never did.

“What are we discussing, then?”

Still not looking up: “Consumer theory.”

You laugh—more a huff of air than anything, grin sardonically out of one corner of your mouth. Seungcheol sees none of it. “Wrong,” you answer, already expecting the way he shrugs it off. “I’m gonna skip ahead a few chapters, though. Consider it a freebie for your business class.”

It must be your tone that finally grabs his attention. Cutting, precise, purposeful. Seungcheol lowers his phone, quirks an eyebrow, wonders where this is going to go. It’s clear he’s pissed you off, that you’re itching for a fight. It’s clear the years of silence are finally coming to a head.

“Let’s talk about ROI. You know what that is?” You barely give him a second. “Return on investment. A performance measure used to evaluate the efficiency of an investment or compare the efficiency of several investments. So, let’s say I make one-hundred-thousand won on a ten-thousand won investment: my ROI is 90%. Are you following?”

He nods.

“Great, now let’s try something a bit more hypothetical.” You suck in a breath. “Let’s say I invest years of my adolescence into someone. A friend at first and then something more. Let’s say I played cheerleader, supported every hope and dream he had—went to every game, cheered him on, helped him practice his English. Held his hand and talked him down when the pressure felt overwhelming, when the only thing that felt inevitable was failure. Now, let’s say all I got in return was a stuttered, awkward apology as he dumped me and walked out the door. Let’s say that guy showed up again after years of silence just to once again waste my fucking time.”

The thing about pain is it’s not linear. What hurt five, ten years ago might not hurt today, but it might tomorrow; what hurt yesterday may never hurt again. The thing about pain is it lets you stick your head in the sand until it can’t anymore, and that’s where you are now: that window of time between Seungcheol walking out the door on the assumption you’d never see him again before he bulldozed his way back into your life has been slammed closed, locked up tight.

So you don’t even notice you’re crying until the room goes deathly silent and you can hear the drip drip drip of tears on paper. Until you watch Seungcheol’s hands flex and unflex in mid-air, stuck in that liminal space, wanting to reach out but knowing he has no right to. Until your chest aches so bad you’re sure you’re either about to break into stardust or cease to exist.

Until you say, “What, Choi Seungcheol, would you say my fucking return on investment was?” and he has nothing to say at all.

Kaori invites you to a party.

Just something small to celebrate the end of midterms and a classmate’s birthday. Nothing out of control or raucous, not even the kind of thing that’d earn a second glance from campus security. I won’t even make fun of you if you leave before eleven, is how she sold it to you, in addition to a small amount of begging and bargaining and a powerful set of puppy-dog eyes.

After everything the two of you have been through, you find it hard to say no.

So here you are, nearly eleven o’clock on a Friday, a cup of cheap beer in hand. A friend of a friend of a friend is wailing into a karaoke machine and although your ears are bleeding, it does feel nice for that to be your greatest worry. You aren’t thinking about your classes or how you’ve been prioritizing everyone else’s academic success. You aren’t thinking about whatever’s going on between Kaori and Ken. You aren’t thinking about Seungcheol.

At least you aren’t, until he walks through the door.

You’re going to continue not thinking about him at all—not about the fact he’s alone or how good he looks in a simple black T-shirt that’s a little taut in the shoulders. You’re not going to think about the way the air shifts, like the universe knows he’s important and is willing to accommodate. You’re not going to think about how Kaori catches your eye across the room, recognizes him from all her internet searches, and the way she mouths oh my god he’s so beefy at you.

You’re not going to think about how guilty you feel that she doesn’t know, because if you do you’re certain it’ll take over.

You watch Seungcheol work the room; watch as he floats between conversations, as strangers fall over themselves at the sight of him. How eager everyone is to give him something and how reluctant he is to take them. You watch as he winds up in the same circle as Kaori and how she must mention you, oh, your tutor is my roommate, because there’s a question in return before he turns and meets your gaze.

You wonder why the distance between you feels more insurmountable now than ever before.

Seungcheol finds you in your office.

It’s not a Tuesday or a Thursday, far later than four to six in the evening, but he doesn’t even bother knocking before he’s barreling in, stifling your space with his bad energy.

You haven’t seen him in nearly two weeks. Not since the party, if that even counts. Hasn’t bothered to reply to any of your texts or emails, and that was just fine by you, if that’s how he wanted to act, but it isn’t until he’s brooding on the other side of your desk that you realize you’re still aggrieved, too. Feels a little too familiar, him leaving you behind and in the dark.

So you don’t mean to—typically have much more professionalism than this—but when he tosses a stapled stack of papers with a barely-passing grade on your desk and says, “This is your fault,” the words come automatically and without forethought.

“Fuck off, Seungcheol.” It’s not your words that take him by surprise; more so the roll of your eyes, the accompanying huff. The impression that all of this is beneath you and nothing more than a mere annoyance. That however affected you were two weeks ago is not how affected you are anymore. “That’s what happens when you blow off your tutoring for two weeks because you’re a coward.”

He laughs, incredulous; unable to help the sound the tumbles out of his mouth. “I’m a—I’m a coward?”

“Yes,” you reply, tone giving away nothing. All he sees is feigned nonchalance despite the hurricane you feel brewing beneath the surface. “This,” you continue, pinching the corner of the paper between your fingertips and disposing of it in the trashcan beneath your desk, “is all on you, but do please let me know if there’s anything else you’d like to blame me for. I’m all ears.”

You don’t miss it: the way Seungcheol’s eyes grow wide at your ‘I’m all.’ The way he thinks you’re going to punctuate that sentence with yours, and it nearly has bile rising in your throat. Makes you want to scream, rip at your hair. If the last few months have taught you anything, it’s that you are still hopelessly in love with the man across from you—the man that continues to leave before he’s left, always at your expense.

So, yeah—Seungcheol is a coward, but only when it comes to you.

But he doesn’t look much like one now, gripping so hard at the edge of your desk that his knuckles have gone white, baseball cap pulled down low enough his eyes are barely visible. He’s always been overwhelming, always carried himself with an exaggerated arrogance even when it wasn’t warranted, always took everything so seriously, and maybe that’s why you’d thought he’d treat you the same way. Take you seriously. Wouldn’t just throw it all away on a maybe thing, and that’s why it's been years and you still aren’t over it.

Maybe Seungcheol is a coward, and maybe so are you.

Because not once since he’s been back have you been able to say what you mean. Can’t seem to tell him about the anger, the hurt, the heartbreak. Played it all off as petty nonchalance because you foolishly thought that would hurt him, that you’ve been reduced to simmering ash, no hope left for a fire.

“I could never blame you for a goddamn thing,” he says, voice so deep you could drown in it.

You so desperately want to know. You don’t want to know anything at all. You want Seungcheol to explain everything to you in detail and spoil the ending, but only if it’s guaranteed to be happy. Enduring another loss like the first time—you’re not sure you can take it. Not after you two have crossed paths like this, because you’ve never quite believed in fate but you think that has to mean something. That so much time and life had transpired and you two came back together.

Today, though, it doesn’t look like you’re going to get any answers.

Seungcheol straightens, looms at full height. Digs into the pocket of his sweatpants and pulls out a thumb drive. Wordlessly, he hands it over, and then he’s gone just as abruptly as he’d arrived.

Again.

Kaori wants to spend the weekend moping, and you can’t come up with a good reason not to join her.

She doesn’t mention Ken once. Not when she’s sobbing over A Silent Voice and Toradora! after that. Not when she keeps glancing at her phone every couple minutes to see if she has any texts. Not when you—only halfway paying attention between grading and your own assignments—suggest ordering something for delivery, maybe that new burger place down the street you heard was good, and Kaori shuts it down so vehemently you can only assume it was Ken’s favorite place.

Kaori just cries over the man with the big dick she never expected to take so seriously, and not even your stonewalling makes her feel ashamed of it.

And there’s respectability in that kind of openness and vulnerability. At least whatever she’s feeling is honest; at least she can admit she’s sad. You think watching Kaori process her breakup might help you process yours too, years too late, so you suck in a breath and ask, “Can I tell you something or is now not a good time?”

Kaori looks over at you. Dabs a soggy tissue at her eyes. “Well, I guess it depends,” is her answer, and she doesn’t shy away from how waterlogged her voice sounds. “If you’re going to tell me you’re a Takasu and Kawashima shipper, maybe, but if it’s anything worse I’m not sure I could take it.”

“I—what? Who even are they?” She gives you a half-hearted thumbs up. You sigh in response, sink further into the couch. “It’s, uh.” Clear your throat. “Do you remember when we met sophomore year? At that party? And I told you I wasn’t looking for anything and you said, and I quote, why not, I have a sixth sense for this kind of thing and I know that guy will have a huge—”

She hides her face behind her hands. “Ew, god, yes I remember that. My dick whisperer era. How embarrassing.”

“Right. And I told you I wasn’t looking for anything because I’d just gotten out of something.”

“Not really by choice, if I remember correctly. I told you if it was quiet it should’ve been loud, and then you never talked about it again.”

You nod. “I—yeah, that sounds like something I would’ve said.” You suck in a deep breath. “Listen, this is probably gonna sound bad considering I did never talk about it again, but—”

“Hey,” Kaori says, nudging you with her foot. Meant to be comforting, somehow. “It’s okay. There’s a lot you don’t know about me, too… most of which I’m not sure you should, actually.”

A laugh forces its way out, gives you a nice reprieve from the anxiety of the conversation you’re about to have. The need to explain it all, the need for advice. Maybe it’s not her—or anyone else’s—business, but you think you’ve kept this to yourself long enough. You and Seungcheol loved each other, once, and it seems foolish that no one knows.

Maybe Kaori had been right. Maybe love should be shouted from the rooftops; exist out in the open. Maybe something hidden in the shadows can never thrive in the light, and you knew it back then, deep down, but now it seems so obvious.

You think back to a few days before the library. Think about how things didn’t feel good but they felt okay. Think about the frustrated crease between Seungcheol’s eyebrows as he stared down at his textbook and how all you’d wanted to do was smooth it. Think about how you’d rolled your lips and tried not to laugh; how you thought it’d take a miracle to help Seungcheol pass this class.

Think about: What is the difference between the short-run and the long-run from the perspective of production theory?

Think about the short-run of your and Seungcheol’s relationship—that you’d burned bright and fast, even though it’d felt like a million years. Hadn’t dared to consider the long-run because anything beyond that bubble felt impossible.

Think about: Which of the following is not a property of isoquants?

Think about the way Seungcheol’s eyes lit up when he knew the answer. That they’re always linear, he said, and you smiled at his enthusiasm, raised your hand to high-five him and dropped it when he hadn’t noticed.

You think about the explanation—isoquants can be linear when inputs are perfectly substitutable—and what those graphs look like. Downward sloping, left to right. Think about how the graphs change when the isoquants are perfect complements.

L-shaped. Less straight as the inputs become poorer substitutes.

You know what your and Seungcheol’s graph would’ve looked like back then.

So it’s easy, almost, to tell Kaori everything. You tell her about growing up in Daegu, about the smell of the azaleas at Biseulsan in the spring. You tell her about how your parents had befriended the neighbors, how they had a kid your age, that that kid was Seungcheol—yes, that Seungcheol.

She’s able to anticipate the rest from there, but you fill in the blanks of what she can’t: being sixteen and falling in love, holding hands, the clandestine notes. All those football matches and how your throat would be hoarse from cheering. How nauseous you’d felt applying to university in Seoul, how excited you were when Seungcheol said he was coming with you. That, after you arrived, it felt like you were living in fast-forward. Barely any time to breathe or adjust; no time to just be you and Seungcheol. You had to be a student, someone responsible; Seungcheol had to be a phenom.

“Could you feel it was going to happen?” Kaori asks, now sat ramrod straight, all her attention on you. “Like, did you know?”

“I don’t know,” you admit. “Maybe I did? It’s hard to say now, all this time later. I know things definitely felt different, like life was pulling us in opposite directions.” You laugh, bitterness coloring the edges. “You couldn’t go two blocks without seeing him on some billboard, and I was just… normal, you know? I wasn’t some rising star athlete like he was, I just went to my classes. How was I supposed to compete with something like that?”

Your roommate hums, leans back into the pillows as she stares up at the ceiling. “I don’t think you were. Maybe that’s why Seungcheol was worried—maybe he felt like you were losing your own identity feeling like you had to keep up.”

You want to push back, argue that you weren’t, that you didn’t, but the truth is that it’s possible. That the shadows created by Seungcheol’s dreams were so massive you wouldn’t be surprised if they unintentionally swallowed you up. “It still wasn’t his choice to make,” you say, voice barely above a whisper.

And Kaori already knows all about your hurt, listened as you explained it all and laid everything bare. So when she says, “Sometimes that’s just how it goes, though, babe,” it doesn’t feel condescending. “We do the best we can with what we’ve got at the time. You can say now it wasn’t Seungcheol’s choice to make, because it’s been almost five years and you’ve made a life for yourself separate from him. But the—god, this is gonna sound so patronizing, I am so sorry—but you guys were so young. No one has it all figured out at that age.”

She snorts, runs a hand through her messy hair. “Shit, I’m nearly halfway to thirty and I still don’t know anything.” Adopts a frown. “What do you want now? Do you want closure? Want to try to fix things and become friends?”

“I don’t know,” you admit, biting at a hangnail. “He actually, um. The other day when he stopped by my office, he left me a USB drive? And before you ask, no I did not already look at it.”

“A USB drive? Who does this guy think he is, James Bond?” A pause. “Are you gonna look at it, though?”

You do.

Not until the silver, midnight light creeps in through your bedroom curtains and you’ve stared at the ceiling long enough; waited long enough for texts that never came, for divine intervention to, well, intervene. It never did—fair enough—so you decide to take fate by the reins. Grab your laptop, instant headache from the screen, stick the drive into the port.

It takes a second for it to load, but when it does: dozens of videos, organized by date. Vlogs, by the look of them—some from before your breakup but the majority of them from after.

You’re not sure what you expected, but it wasn’t this.

You click on the first one: a month and a half before both of you moved to Seoul. A fresh-faced Seungcheol appears on your screen, cheeks still round with adolescence. He’s in his room back in Daegu, can’t get the camera angle right. Nostalgia hits you like a ton of bricks as it pans to the side, to the wall behind his bed, and you see all his old posters. Mostly football players you couldn’t name, some girl group he used to love, a few movies. Just below them are some of the notes you’d written him in school, and they’re all you can focus on as he talks about how excited he is for the move.

The next: a few weeks after you’d started classes. By then, Seungcheol was well into the swing of things with Seoul FC. Already a big fish in a small pond, tryout offers from European teams starting to roll in. You can hear yourself in the background stressing over your first exam, wishing a generational curse upon your calculus professor. In the video, Seungcheol laughs, whispers like he’s telling the camera a secret as he talks about how nervous he is for his future. I don’t know why, he says, but it just feels like everything is about to change.

There’s a long pause between that one and the next. You understand why when you look at the date: three months after your breakup. Your hands hover uselessly above your keyboard. Whatever answers you’ve been looking for the last few years are probably in this video, but you can’t bring yourself to open it. Not right away, at least.

You click on a different one at random. Seungcheol’s somewhere in Europe, judging from the language on the signs behind him. Snow falls quietly—whenever he filmed this, it must’ve been early. No one else is around, and he cracks a joke that it’s a good thing, people would probably think he was crazy if they saw him. He doesn’t tell you where he’s going but he narrates the entire walk: points out a cafe he’s grown to love. The way to get to his practice stadium from where he’s standing. Pauses near a restaurant and laughs ruefully, shakes his head, says, I don’t know why I’m telling you this, but one of my teammates set me up on a blind date here and I got stood up. You’d probably think that was funny.

(You do. It also makes your chest ache.)

One from two years ago: Seungcheol in a hotel room, clearly nervous. He raises his hand to wave at the camera and you can see the corners of his nails bitten raw. Dark circles beneath his eyes; cheekbones more pronounced than you’ve ever seen them. On the screen, Seungcheol sighs, rakes a hand through freshly-bleached hair. Sucks in a deep breath as he says, I’m so nervous. I’m so—so fucking nervous and I don’t. Fuck, I don’t know what to do. I want to call you because you always knew what to say but that’s so fucking selfish. God, we haven’t spoken in years, and it’s my—that’s my fault, I know, so I brought this all on myself. I just want to hear your voice.

Another from a week after that: the color’s returned to his face, and he’s recording from what looks like a penthouse apartment. Sleek, modern; a small white dog napping on the bed beside him. He smiles, looks like he got his teeth fixed, looks like he’s no longer carrying around the weight of the world. Talks endlessly and excitedly about some tournament. Talks so fast you can barely keep up. Talks around words tinged with languages you don’t understand.

Seungcheol wins a championship. Records a drunk vlog from the same night, hair soaked through with god-knows-what—water, champagne, you don’t know. But he looks radiant. Looks like the culmination of two decades of dreaming. He looks happy, free, at peace. He looks like the reason he let you go, why he had to go away.

You scroll to the bottom of the files. Pause at the last video, dated seven months before the term started.

“Hi,” he says, and you can immediately tell everything is all wrong. Seungcheol’s in the dark, face only visible enough to see the tears tracking on his cheeks. “This is going to be the last one of these I make. I don’t know if you, uh—I’m sure you aren’t paying attention to me—my career—anymore, but. I, um. I got hurt. Ruptured my ACL. They’re not sure I’ll…” A sob escapes him. Has you wanting to climb through the screen to hold him, thumb away his tears, tell him everything is going to be okay. “They don’t know if I’ll ever play again.”

Seungcheol no longer looks happy, free, at peace. “Maybe you’ll be happy to hear that,” he continues. “Maybe it’ll help you to know I threw away our relationship for nothing.”

Cut to black.

The sudden silence is deafening. Has you desperately clicking back to the video you’d skipped, the one from just after your breakup. Seungcheol looks the same in that one, too, like the life has been drained out of him.

I don’t know why I’m doing this. It’s not like I’ll ever show these to you now, since I…

I’m sure I owe you an explanation. To be honest, I don’t know what I’m doing, I just—things have been so hard, and I’m still trying to make sense of it all. I feel like my life went from zero to a hundred before I could even blink and now I’m scrambling. I didn’t think it was fair to—to drag you through that. Me being away, moving to an entirely different continent. I have faith we could do it, I just. I don’t know, baby, I don’t…

You deserve to have your own life. Be your own person. I’m so scared that the world will never see you for who you are—so beautiful and intelligent and kind. You don’t deserve to be reduced to my partner. And if you ever see this, I know you’re gonna roll your eyes. Probably call me a mean name because I took the choice away from you, because you think I’m trying to be selfless and heroic, and you’d be right. It’s not fair, and I wish I could tell you I’m sorry.

I wish I could just… pluck out my brain and give it to you, because even if it killed me to do it, at least it makes sense to me. And I don’t—I don’t want you to think I’m not hurting. I’ve been sick to my stomach since I left. I know I’m making a mistake, I know I am, I just—how do I do what I think is right in the long-run when it’s not what I want right now, or ever?

I don’t want to get over you. I don’t want you to get over me, and that’s how you know I’m not acting selflessly, because you should. I want you to always be happy, I just… wish it was with me.

So, I’m going to keep making these. I’m going to take you along for the ride, wherever it takes us, because you should be here but I can only hope you can one day understand why you’re not. I’m so—I’m so sorry, I don’t…

I’m sorry.

I love you.

You fall asleep and dream that you were the one meant to meet him at that restaurant.

The first thing you do is make a call to your mother.

“Could you send another container of yakgwa?”

On the other end of the line, your mother tuts, motherly intuition audibly kicking into overdrive. Is probably wearing that all-knowing, sly grin she always does when you try to be coy and evasive. “What happened to the last container I sent?”

“Ah, you know Kaori loves those. They barely lasted an hour after I told her what was in there.”

She hums an acknowledgement. Sounds like she takes a sip of tea. “I remember someone else being quite fond of those cookies, too.”

“Well, they are the most popular cookies in the country, so.”

After haranguing you into admitting they’re for Seungcheol and not your roommate, your mother promises to send them quickly. A few days at most, which buys you enough time to figure out how you’re going to approach the man in question.

The vlogs have turned your entire world upside-down. Answered questions you hadn’t even known you had. Took all that anger and resentment you’d been holding onto and set it free, and now you’re just left with… a void. Want to mend things, and it makes you wonder if such a thing is even possible, if it’s too late, but you don’t let those thoughts get very far.

Instead, you let them spur you into action. Have you sitting in front of your laptop at your desk, office hours long since over, silence creeping in the more the department empties. The thrum of the airconditioning and the tick-tick-tick of the clock are all the only company you have.

You worry if it’ll show on camera, how out of sorts you feel: sweating from the nerves, dabbing at your hairline; cheeks warm to the touch. But you suck in a breath anyway, steel yourself. Look at your webcam and the daunting red circle…

And start recording.

He hadn’t gotten it at first. Not really.

There’d been a container of yakgwa outside his door with his USB drive taped to the top of it. No note—not that he needed one to know who it was from, but he wasn’t sure what it was. A goodbye? A please fuck off forever and never contact me again?

He’d just taken them inside. Ate too many of the cookies while feeling sorry for himself. Maybe had a glass or two of wine to compound the issue, and never, ever considered contacting you. Didn’t think he could bear it if you never wanted to see him again, but he just…

Well, he was drunk and alone and he missed you, and he’d rewatched all those videos he recorded a million times before when he was like this, so what was a million and one?

It’d been the same as every time before: he smiled at the happy parts, cried at all his old wounds. Wanted to reach through the screen and strangle his past self for including that part about the blind date, because he never wanted to date anyone who wasn’t you, why would he say that, felt mortified at the thought of you watching that—

And then there it was.

All the way at the bottom. A new video. One that hadn’t been recorded by him—

Hi, Cheol, you say, and that’s all it takes to reduce him to a sobbing, yearning mess. I’m not sure what to say here. I don’t really record much—sometimes for lectures when the professors are too busy, but never anything personal like this, but I watched every single one you made for me and I thought I should return the favor.

I wanted to tell you everything I’ve been up to since you left, but it hasn’t been much. I got my degree. Tutored a lot in undergrad—the same thing I’m tutoring you in now, actually. I was good at it and it felt good to have something that was mine, you know? I almost moved for grad school. Thought for a while I was going to wind up in New York, but then my parents divorced and it felt like too much, too scary, so I stayed. Kaori also stayed, so we got an apartment together. It’s not much, definitely not as nice as your place, but it’s good enough.

I don’t think I ever told you, but she was seeing a guy for a bit and he was… obsessed with you, to say the least. Thought you were the coolest person in the world. They aren’t seeing each other anymore. Ended pretty badly, but—speaking of which, maybe steer clear of Student Services for a while, too.

Sometimes it felt like failure that I wound up staying here. That I had scholarships from all these far-away, prestigious places and didn’t take advantage of them. That I gave into my fear. And now… I don’t know. Maybe there’s a reason I stayed behind. Maybe there’s a reason you ended up back here, too.

Whatever happens—I don’t want you to think I still blame you. Kaori says we do the best we can with what we’ve got at the time, and I understand now that’s what you did. Even though it hurt me, you were trying to protect me. I get it now. And I’m sorry you had to go through all of that alone. I can’t imagine how hard it must’ve been to go to all these places you didn’t know. To have to deal with your injury, the loss of a dream.

You said in one of your videos that you just want me to be happy, and that’s all I want for you, too, whatever that looks like.

Here’s my address if you ever want to come by to talk.

I love you, too.

—and then he’d been up and out the door, feeling stone cold sober, running to the front of his building to wait for his ride.

Felt like the drive took hours. Must’ve hit every red light between his apartment and yours. Took the steps two at a time just to get to your door faster.

There’s a man already standing outside your door when he gets there. One that looks shocked to see him, stars in his eyes, and when Seungcheol says, “Oh, you must be Kaori’s ex,” he looks more like he wants the earth to swallow him whole. Embarrassed in front of his idol.

He knocks on your door and gets no response. Knocks again, harder this time, and he has to try really hard to stifle his laughter when your voice yells from the inside, “Fuck off, Kenji, I already told you she’s not here!”

“It’s me,” Seungcheol yells back.

There’s quiet again. Just enough time for it to feel like his heart is going to beat right out of his chest and follow Kaori’s ex down the hall.

Then you’re yanking the door open—slowly, so slowly, like you’re scared it’s not actually him. Your eyes are brimming with tears when they meet his own, and he doesn’t let himself think, just goes on instinct, when he grabs for you, hands on your cheeks, and presses his lips to yours.

Somehow you taste the same.

Somehow you taste like redemption.

You taste like home.

Seungcheol kisses you until the tears slow. Kisses you until the universe realigns, until he could map your mouth in the dark. Kisses you until all you’re all he knows again.

When he pulls away, you’re gripping at his sweatshirt, don’t want to let him go. He presses his forehead to yours, offers up a million more apologies, starts talking nonsense. Says he’s going to drop microeconomics, what the hell does he know, he barely has a passing grade anyway, what does it matter, he’s such an idiot—

And then you say, “You came back,” and nothing else matters.

“I always will.”

(Later on, as you’re trying to steady your breathing, slick with sweat, your thigh thrown over Seungcheol’s hip as he stares down at you, dopey smile on his face, you say, “Choi Seungcheol, don’t you dare drop that class. I have worked my ass off to get you to barely-passing.”)

if you’ve made it this far thank you so much for reading! i am still very new at writing for seventeen, so i hope this was acceptable. i'm now going to throw myself into the warped tour vernon fic and will hopefully not go another 7+ months without posting anything. 😭

i would love to hear your thoughts! <3

#seungcheol x reader #scoups x reader #seungcheol angst #seungcheol au #scoups angst #seungcheol imagines #scoups imagines #seventeen fanfic #seventeen imagines #seventeen x reader #jewel writes

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bettysupremacy · 8 months

Note

hii! I was wondering if you could write a fic with reader and any marauder (they all fit) and maybe helping or becoming protective over the reader after a concert or party after a creep follows the reader? 😭

I went through a similar experience with a guy following me around after I went to the restroom after a concert, and it ruined my night if i'm being honest, I was scared 😞 I'm not the most shy of people and usually I can handle myself but it was pretty dark and idk the adrenaline from feeling happy to scared shifted pretty quickly. Luckily I found my friends and let them know and we quickly went back to our car (along with a few dirty looks from my friends god bless lol). I swore I could go to the restroom by myself- will not be doing that again :(

you can ignore this request if it makes you uncomfortable!

thank uu

i’m so sorry that happened to you! “(they all fit)”= poly marauders!

There’s something about post concert depression, especially when you’re with the band.

Your glitter eyeshadow is smudged, eyeliner untouched. You’d been shaken around in the pit of your boyfriends fans, and yet the paint hasn’t budged. God bless water-proof makeup. The world seems prettier like this, touched by alcohol and the feeling of soaring pride for your boyfriends. The glittery lights and signs of time square never fail to dazzle you, even now as you lean against Sirius morosely.

“M’hungry.” You frown, toes tipping up towards Sirius, though you fear the mumble may have been more for yourself.

His attention is diverted towards the boys as they discuss what to do now. Plans of how to get home and where to eat. His finger taps your cheek slowly, his focus paying you no mind. Words like Uber, hotel, room service echo throughout their very repetitive conversation.

“Sirius.”

He looks down, a little shocked and sorry at his own attention. “Yes, lovely?”

“M’hungry.”

“Hungry?” He asks, cringing. You’re about thirty minutes from the hotel, and even then, room service will take another thirty.

“So hungry.”

He sighs, unsure of what to do.

“There’s a hotdog stand over there.” You grab his tattooed bicep to balance yourself as you point to your right.

He thinks, peering down at you. “This won’t ruin your dinner?” It’s midnight, but still.

“No,” you sing, reaching up to cup his cheeks. “I really want a hotdog.

He flushes, looking away from your wandering eyes. Normally he wouldn’t let you out of his sight. They would never let you out of their sight in a place like this. But the cart is in eye view of the boys, and he has faith in you not to stray, even in your inebriated manor. It’s not that they don’t trust you, they just prefer to keep you safe themselves. Is that okay?

“Okay,” He murmurs, pulling out his wallet, handing you his card. “At least get the good toppings.”

“I always get the good toppings.” You pull away.

The walk is short and the cart is colorful. Red and white stripes, curvy calligraphy. It shines in your inebriated vision. Beautiful. The queues not long, just an older man waiting in front of you, but it feels like forever as the generous man (with the toppings as well) takes your order and wraps it in warm aluminum foil.

You take the hotdog eagerly. “Thank you.”

It’s heavy in your hands, warm too. You yell Sirius’ name excitedly, waving the hotdog above your head for him to see. He laughs, thumbs up until you bump into a man, smile fading, concern etching his brows.

“Oh,” you murmur, looking up. “I’m sorry.”

“No problem,” he smiles. It’s uncomfortable, not the smile of a friendly civilian.

You laugh. It’s polite, anyone can see that, but he leans closer. He smells like liquor, a disgusting discovery that has you subconsciously leaning away.

“You new around here?”

An actual laugh stumbles out of your lips. “London? No.”

He takes this as an entrance. “You should show me around.”

“No, thank you.” You try to walk past him. Towards Sirius who’s already walking over. “Goodnight.”

“Wait,” he grabs your arm, pulling you back. His fingers dig into your elbow painfully.

“What the fuck,” you gasp, pulling your arm away roughly. “don’t touch me.”

“C’mon,” The man slurs, fingers reaching for you again. “Don’t be-“

“Hello?” Sirius walks up, all stock. He grabs your forearm pulling you to him firmly, getting in between you and the man. He’s not much taller, but more intimidating in demeanor. “Do we have a problem?”

“No,” the man scoffs.

“Cause it looks like you put your hands on her.”

He scoffs again, clearly inebriated. “We were just talking.”

“Well, conversations over now.”

“She can make her own decisions.”

“Fuck off, bro.” Sirius waves his hand dismissively. Quickly, he walks you towards the boys who are peeking their eyes up from the Uber app.

“She was asking for it.”

Sirius reels back, dropping your forearm to shove the scary stranger in the chest. He pushes hard, the man losing his balance as he falls to the ground in a sickening thud. You gasp loudly, the unexpected conflict startling you. Vaguely you hear Sirius say something to him, but you’re too focused on the way the man looks up at you.

James and Remus are there in seconds, quick on Sirius’s heels. They pull at him, up and off the man. There were no real punches thrown, no real injuring blows, it wasn’t even enough to form a crowd. But still, you’re shaken. You shiver like a leaf under your James’ leather jacket, suddenly not feeling the warmth of the alcohol you’d consumed before the concert.

Slowly, you stumble back and way from your boys, to the bench next to the shitty bar you’d passed on your way home. That had been scary, but you’re safe; that had been scary, but Sirius dealt with it. You bring your hand up to your chest, setting the hotdog you had been eager to buy down next to you.

“Hi,” Remus pushes aside the hotdog to sit next to you. “Are you okay?”

You look up to the boy, blindingly beautiful in the streetlights and advertisements. “Yes.”

He pushes some stray hair from your face. “He didn’t hurt you?”

“I think it was more startling.” James sits on the other side of you, kissing your temple firmly. “I’m sorry he did that.”

“It’s okay, I’m okay.”

“She’s okay.” Sirius gruffs from where he walks over.

He sounds cooler than he thinks he looks. He’s not bruised, bloodied, or bandaged, if he were he thinks he’d look cool enough to breeze over. But then again you look mad, so maybe he doesn’t want that.

“Don’t be upset,” Sirius crouches to your level. You’re in the arms of a solid Remus. “he was a creep.”

“Are you hurt?”

“Are you trying to tell me something?” He laughs roguishly. “I thought I looked good tousled.”

He does, and you know he’ll look good on the tabloids tomorrow too. Sirius black gives black eye? You sigh at the thought.

“You do.” James feeds Sirius.

“At least someone in this relationship cares for my ego.”

“You look good.”

“Oh, now you tell me.”

You laugh, letting Sirius stare at you like you hung the moon.

“Kiss em?” He pushes his knuckles in front of your lips. His fingers throb lightly, you can feel it on your lips.

“That was stupid.”

“C’mon,” Sirius’ eyes roll as he pulls you up. “You’ve got a hotdog to eat.”

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heartsforhavik · 2 months

Note

hi i was wondering if you would do headcannons of the yan!fanboy if reader actually noticed him coming to all their shows and events

obsessed (superfan! yandere boy x gn!popstar reader)

warnings: stalking, average yandere tendencies, nsfw, perverted yandere, gender neutral reader, mentions of naked reader but no genitalia addressed, dom reader, reader is compliant with the yandere and teases him a ton, lowercase intended. btw i do not condone yanderes irl.

a/n: i hope y'all know i read every single one of your asks, comments, and reblogs. i appreciate them all and they do brighten my day. i'm just saying this so y'all know that the stuff you send to other writers (not just me) matters a lot!! when you interact it gives them inspiration!!! and motivation!! me personally sometimes i see ONE kind reblog and i immediately get my ass up and start writing something just because of that one person. don't get me wrong, i still love all my lurkers that silently like a ton of my stuff, y'all are important too. anyways i'll shut up now onto the hcs. (btw this ended up being a fic instead of hcs i apologize. i went crazy over this i'm sorry anon LMAO)

"hey, you look pretty familiar. have you been to a few shows before?" you asked kindly, facing the short man in the front row of the audience.

bayani froze as the stadium's screens pointed to him. he opened his mouth in an attempt to say something, but nothing came out. his face went red and his throat went dry. did you actually notice him, or was he just dreaming?

after a few seconds of waiting for an answer, you shrugged. "sorry, maybe i mistook you for someone else. anyways..."

the yandere boy still didn't move, with his mouth agape, as you continued on with your show. the people around bayani didn't seem to care, assuming that he was just a starstruck fan. but it was more than that. much more than that.

out of the millions of fans that attend your shows and events, you recognized him among them. you noticed him. and he didn't know how to handle it. what was he supposed to say? what would you even talk about? sure, he's seen all of your interviews and heard your music and dissected your lyrics for hours every single day, but would you ever want to interact with him as much as he wanted to interact with you? he was just a lowlife. he had an average job, average amount of money, he lived in a shitty apartment, and he had no friends or major accomplishments. all of his free time outside of work was spent on you. spent on following your every move and investigating everything you've put your hands on. if you ever spoke to him, you'd probably think he was some sort of pathetic stalker.

that thought drove him mad. he couldn't even focus on the rest of your concert. he didn't hear the blaring music and screams from the crowd. he wasn't paying attention to your performance, either.

he could only stand there and imagine the punishments you'd inflict on him if you found out about his obsession. would you call your security to take him away? he'd hope not. if he's going to be kicked and pushed around, perhaps even handcuffed, he'd rather you do the job rather than some random guard. but maybe he'd accept the punishment, only because you were the one who deemed it necessary. he takes your word like gospel, so he'll take whatever punishment you want, even though he would prefer your hands on him while you do it.

his imagination ran wild as your concert finished and you walked off the stage with your dancers. the crowd of fans in the stadium dispersed around him, moving along with their day. but bayani couldn't just move on with his day knowing that you know he exists now. how is he supposed to simply move on from that? he spent a long time making sure you never noticed him. even though he attended every single one of your concerts and events, he did not want to be noticed. he knew he wouldn't be able to handle it. but it finally happened. he finally got a taste of what it's like to be seen by the love of his life. he couldn't just leave it at that. he had to do something about it.

being under your gaze, even if it was only a few seconds, made him feel like he went to heaven. it made all of the hundreds of dollars he spent on you worth it. all of the hours he spent listening to your music and watching videos of you was worth it. it was like he awoke from a slumber. a long, miserable slumber. he had to find a way to thank you. say something to you. he messed up when he simply froze after you saw him. who knows when he'll get another chance like that?

it took a few hours for the stadium to be empty, and the security started to shoo bayani away. but when he went outside, the parking lot was still full. your concert ended hours ago, but there was still loads of cars trying to leave. it would be frustrating, but bayani had to find a way out quickly.

he climbed on the back of a nearby truck and rested his legs there, waiting patiently for the vehicle to move out of the traffic. even though he knew the truck wouldn't go anywhere near your mansion, he knew how to get to your house on foot. he only needed to rest on the truck until the traffic was gone.

after a few hours on the road, he jumped out of the vehicle, and started to walk to your mansion on foot. he didn't need to look up the location online, because he already knew where it was. he visited your home many times in the past, he just never attempted to go inside before.

his veins were on fire and he started to sweat the closer he got. he was starting to have second thoughts about his idea. but there was no time to go back, because he already showed up to your house before he could change his plans.

to get inside, he had to climb up a tree, jump off of it, and land in your backyard. he used that trick often in the past, since it was not his first time going to your house. he often snuck on your property to watch or take pictures of you while you slept.

he tried opening your bedroom window, but it was locked. he had to try a different one.

he went over to a window beside your bedroom, and thankfully, it was unlocked. but the moment he opened the window, he heard the sound of water running and your familiar voice humming a song. were you in the shower?

bayani climbed inside as quietly as possible, and closed the window behind him. his suspicions were correct. he was in your bathroom, and you were taking a shower. your curtains covered up your figure, so he couldn't see you.

bayani looked to the side of the room and saw a pile of your dirty clothes on the floor. he ran up to it and immediately took a large whiff at the pile. it smelled divine to him. he couldn't get enough of it. he quickly spotted your used underwear in the pile and snatched it without thinking, then he stuffed it in his pocket. you wouldn't notice, right?

before he could take the rest of your clothes, the water suddenly stopped. bayani ran to hide, in a spot where you couldn't see him but he could see you. you opened the shower curtains and stepped out with a towel in your hands. you were completely naked, and still drenched in water. bayani felt like he died and went to heaven again that day. he couldn't believe what he was seeing. you were completely naked, right in front of his eyes. ignoring the puddle in his pants, he nervously fumbled around his pockets, trying to find his phone. there was no way he could pass up an opportunity like this. without hesitation, he snapped a photo of you.

but he didn't notice that the flash was on.

he froze, and you looked towards him. neither of you said a word, and bayani saw his future flash before his eyes. you would probably scream for security and he would get taken away to prison, never to see your face again. his life would be over.

"you're the guy i've been seeing everywhere, huh?" you whispered.

"...are you going to, uh... send me away?" bayani gulped.

you thought about it for a moment. this guy clearly cared a lot about you, because you saw him literally everywhere you went. no matter what country you visited, he was always there. even if you didn't tell a single soul where you were going, he was somehow always there. you even saw him on your property a few times, so you knew how crazy he was. but you still let him do it. and you never reported him, either. you knew exactly what he wanted. you could always hear him moaning outside your window, knowing he would have one hand down his pants and a camera on the other.

he was cute, so why not have some fun with him?

"come here." you commanded. he followed your order without thinking, immediately falling down to his knees in front of you.

you grabbed his chin, and made him look up at you. he felt hot tears well up in his eyes as you stared him down. he didn't say a word, but you knew exactly what he was thinking.

you pressed your knee against the wet stain on his pants, and he let out a pathetic whimper. he was getting off on it.

he didn't know what to do. his dreams were finally coming true. he got noticed by you, got into your house, saw you naked, and you finally touched him. he was overwhelmed, and started crying. he didn't mean to look so weak in front of you for a first impression, but he couldn't help it. besides, he'd make a fool out of himself any day for you.

"you're so pathetic.. you've been stalking me for so long, and now you break into my house to see me naked. i could call the police and have you arrested..." you whispered, as you started putting more pressure on his crotch, moving your knee up and down on it, and inching your face closer to his.

he sobbed, “please, don't! i promise, it'll never happen again. i'll stop, i'll do whatever you want, i'll-"

you cut him off by connecting your lips to his, setting his heart on fire. you pulled away after a few seconds, leaving him speechless. there's no way you just kissed him. he had to be dreaming.

and then you moved your knee away from his crotch right before he could cum, making him let out a whimper and crumble to the ground.

"thanks for letting me have some fun with you. we can do this again soon.. if you be a good boy and return my underwear." you winked, walking away and leaving bayani a hard, pathetic, leaking mess on your bathroom floor.

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ch6sos · 4 months

Text

more nanami headcanons (but as your bf !!!)

a/n: hey everyone! thank you for all the support on my last headcanon post. i never really expected it to go far, but somehow it did. it was my first time ever posting a "fic" you know? i was cringing the entire time but it was worth it, for you guys :) since it did well, here is some more!

i used third person by the way so you're referred to as his partner. tried to make this as gender neutral as possible cuz i love you guys

cw: slight suggestiveness (ooooh... but it's not extreme you sillies)

Extreme gentleman. He respects their wishes all the time. If they want space, he will give it to them. He will give them whatever they ask for.

Pays on the first date. He forbids their significant other from doing anything. He will pay because he wants to. He truly wants to, not because he feels obligated to.

Would be kind of shy about doing anything at first, especially Teen!Nanami. Even after a long period of dating, he would always ask before showing affection because he does not know if they feel comfortable or okay with it.

"May I please hold your hand? Are you okay with that?

"...We've been dating for a month."

"I know, but, I must ask, you know? In case it makes you uncomfortable.”

When he (as well as they) grow comfortable, the affection begins to become more "intense." Not intense, but he does it more frequently. He holds their hand more, gives more kisses, more hugs...

He would give the best hugs. He is a cuddle machine. He appears to hate them, but does he truly? Exactly. No, he does not. He loves them so much. He wishes he could give up his job to spend the entire day cuddling with his partner.

"Stay close to me, please."

"I don't plan on moving."

"Good. I wish life were like this every day." He hums, squeezing them gently.

Kisses with him are never short; even if he is late. He never leaves his significant other hanging. He craves and desires to kiss them. He enjoys giving his partner a passionate kiss, drawing them near to his chest, and placing his hand behind their head, leaving a memory of the kiss that is warm, tender, and unforgettable.

Genuinely feels like he could share his emotions with his significant other. Yeah, he is still serious, because it's who he is. He was raised in a family surrounded by serious people. Though, throughout the relationship, he learns how to express his emotions better. He feels like he genuinely could reveal all the emotions he has stored in him already around his significant other. If he's feeling upset, he would genuinely express that to them. If something ticked him off, he would sit down and talk to his partner about it.

Despite all of that, he still is more of a listener than a rambler. He prefers putting others first before him, and that also goes for who gets to talk. He enjoys looking at their partner with a loving gaze, as they talk nonsense. Whether it is about the new show they picked up, their day, or the latest gossip, he loves listening.

He would write love letters. I do not care if you find that corny. He is corny. He will write love letters. Nanami is romantic. I don't care what anyone says he is a romance god who does not get to show it off as much. He loves writing lengthy letters, showing the love he has for his partner. Describes their personality and how much he cherishes them, how much he thinks they're beautiful, and how he thinks that they are the stars in the night sky that stand out.

Playing with his partner's hair is (one of) his favorite ways to show affection. If they have long hair, he loves to try styling it and ruffling it. If they have type 4 coily hair, he starts learning how to take care of it so he can try protective hairstyles on them.

Another thing is lazy Sundays. He loves Sundays. Even though he has to go to stupid work the next day. The sensation of them being in his arms when he wakes up, his arms encircling their bodies firmly, the sheets covering them. He enjoys gently leaning in to kiss their shoulders, the top of their head, and the back of their neck. When they began to stir, he pulled them closer— not wanting to get out of bed. All he wants is to spend Sunday morning in bed with his lovely partner.

Gets flushed at compliments, but it is not as obvious. When their significant other says he is handsome, he smiles softly and thanks them, but on the inside, he is freaking out.

Cooks breakfast in bed for them. Always. He loves getting up just to make his significant other the tastiest breakfast ever; it is his specialty. He prepares a warm beverage and some fruit-flavored crepes topped with Nutella and whipped cream.

Before meeting them, Nanami was kind of an insomniac. He would not sleep; hence why he has dark circles. But after meeting them, he started sleeping more. Despite everything, he continues to get up before his partner to prepare breakfast for them.

Not only that but when he was stressed, he would drink his sorrows away rather than confide in someone. Since the fan book claims that he enjoys drinking, I think that, unfortunately, one of his coping mechanisms is doing exactly that. However, since meeting them, he has kept everything under control. He learned to express himself more freely and genuinely strives to avoid suppressing his emotions.

Bro is a simp. His mouth drops when he sees his partner dressed. His jaw falls to the floor. He is stuttering a bit too. I know he is supposed to be calm and collected but he would NOT be calm and collected around his significant other, people. He would go feral and be a simp for them.

He says I love you first. It was quite unexpected and seemed to come out of nowhere. He just blurted it out without waiting for the perfect moment or anything else. It was probably a simple morning, cuddling with him on the bed as usual, looking at each other fondly, and he said, "You know how much I adore you, right?"

When he realizes what he is saying, his eyes widen slightly, but then crinkle up when they tell him they love him as well.

He will do whatever his partner says. They could be 5'2 or around his height; he is a certified simp who immediately attends to their partner's needs.

Even if that includes forcibly doing silly TikTok trends. He pretends to hate it but he doesn't. He is a munch or whatever Ice Spice said.

He enjoys nuzzling his partner. Guys, I do not care. This man is a bundle of love wrapped up in a stoic-looking man. He enjoys sneaking up behind them, entrapping them in his arms, and nuzzling their neck and the top of their head. Wherever he wants, whenever he wants. And he utters sweet nothings. And leaves tiny, delicate kisses. He also wraps his arms around their waist.

He sometimes becomes overwhelmed, so he requires his own space. However, he does not simply distance himself from his partner. He properly expresses that sometimes he needs his own space. He still adores them but also needs some space. He does not want to cause conflict or misunderstanding because he is not that type of person.

Will be there for them when they are sick, even if they believe they look disgusting. He does not care; he believes they are the most beautiful sight he has ever seen in his entire life (which was cut short) (sorry, I am still coping). He will be there to care for them whether they are throwing up, crying, or whatever.

He cooks for them, he gives them medicine, he cuddles them even though he knows he may get sick...

And he does. Every single time. And he acts like a baby too.

Adorable tall, strong man Nanami acts like a baby when he's sick. He needs to be looked after completely. He starts off coughing (like a grandfather or a father). So his cough is obnoxious and loud, and he frowns. He then looks up at his partner, his expression reminiscent of a puppy who has been denied treats. It is an adorable sight. It's a turnaround from his usual chill demeanor. He then spends the entire day in bed, despite his attempts to do his routine tasks like cleaning and cooking for them, which they forbid. And he pouts about it like a big baby.

"Please let me take care of you. You took care of me, so now it's my turn."

"No, you're sick, Kento."

"That doesn't matter." He frowns.

“You always take care of me anyway.”

“But it is my honor to take care of you, my love.”

and then they end up having seven mental breakdowns

If they bring home a stray one day, he is reluctant on taking it but you know damn well he'd be like one of those dads that is hesitant about taking it at first but then ends up cuddling it the next day and then begging for them to not take it to the shelter.

Genuine sweetheart. Holds the door for their significant other, makes arrangements for them when they can not find the time, prepares meals for them, and if they come from a different culture, he starts to learn about it, particularly if they are involved in it.

...This guy is in no way aggressive. I have seen people mischaracterize him as a dominant "daddy" or whatever because he is serious, and Mappa blessed us with the hair-pulling scene. That scene was primarily caused by rage at Haruta's thoughtless harm to those around him and the fact that the man was going against two young girls. He would never act in such a way toward their partner, particularly when they were in bed. He is more of a gentle lover and is afraid of going too far.

Needs are needs, so if they ask, he will comply with some hesitation. He never seemed to get into it, so he tells them that.

That does not mean he is not into some stuff. Bro be praising. He praises hella and talks them through it.

"My love, doing so well for me."

"So beautiful, so gorgeous, all sprawled out for me like this."

“You’re mine. Until the end of time, angel.”

“God. My love, my everything. You drive me wild, you know that?”

“Eyes on me, sweetheart. Want to see how breathtaking you are from here.” All in his deep, ragged and needy voice.

that made me cringe

help I'm crying at the cringe so sorry

His favorite dates with them involve going to a restaurant. Nanami knows some hidden gems, so he enjoys taking them to restaurants where they can eat delicious food. Being a food enthusiast, it goes without saying that he is aware of the good and bad places to go. Because of Nanami's exquisite taste, they have never had to worry about their food.

As I previously stated, he prefers traditional nicknames such as sweetheart, my love, darling, angel, and beloved. I do not see him calling his significant other "baby," "baby girl," or whatever; I believe he finds it cringe-worthy. This is self-indulgent oops.

Sings softly to them while they are sleeping. He sings a song while they are sleeping because he is too ashamed of his singing. His vocals are not bad; he is just shy. (Little did he know, they had several recordings of him singing in secret...)

He will sacrifice his blanket in bed just to wrap it around his partner if they're cold. Bro would give them 90004868787893 pillows, and 8 blankets if they said they were cold.

He exaggerates things. And when I say he exaggerates, I mean he goes to great lengths to win his partner over. If they enter a new niche, he buys *everything*. On date nights, he gives them large bouquets if they like that, and he treats them as if they were royalty.

"You didn't need to get me this entire figure collection from *series*... I feel so bad."

"Well, do not worry, I enjoy buying these things for you. I see how happy you are, and it immediately warms my heart.”

Arguments with him are not bad. He truly never gets upset to the point of yelling because that is not who he is—he is not a guy who yells and he does not want to cause trauma to people in general. Again, though, he seems composed, and it might be frightening. But he then does something right away that causes his partner to instantly give in. Bro could just breathe and they're like "OKAY" and yeah. I understand. I would fold so hard bro.

His love languages include quality time and acts of service. He loves spending every single second with his partner and is immediately angry at the world when he has to work overtime and can not have more time with them. He enjoys taking them on dates or simply staying at home on lazy days. He loves spending time with them. Furthermore, he expresses his love by doing things for his partner, such as assisting them with their work (if he could), giving them massages when they are stressed, cooking for them all the time, washing their dishes even when they beg him not to, eating the olives off of their plate if there are any... He is the king of acts of service.

He is not good at taking pictures. His large thumb keeps covering the lens, so they have to force him to take the pictures repeatedly. Despite this, he never becomes irritated because he gets butterflies just watching his partner pose in their gorgeous clothes.

Speaking of photos, he already had an Instagram account beforehand. (As much as he hates to admit it, Gojo is sometimes the one who takes the aesthetic photos on his page.) He was not active, but he has a few posts on it, but as soon as they got a partner, oh lord Jesus. Bro will post on his Instagram story every single second.

Even though this happens, he prefers to make his relationship private. Private but known, you know? He wants the world to know that he is lucky enough to date them, but still not reveal information or talk about his relationship to anyone. So he would take those private but not secret type relationship photos.

Captions are always complimenting them and are extremely poetic. He's just that guy.

"saw a breathtaking sight. the beach is also there."

“every aspect of you captivates me, body and soul.”

"we are all floating around with the stars and the universe, and it somehow led me to you."

cringes again

Off-topic but not, Nanami would NEVER, and I mean... NEVER, go for his student if he was a professor, even if their relationship is legal. I can't stand it when people do that. He understands that there's a power dynamic behind it and it's low-key creepy how much people enjoy it.

Along with stepcest. Why do so many of you like stepcest? Nanami is not touching any of his family members. I'm scared to say this and this is probably hella controversial for this app but he's not touching anyone even if they're not technically related.

Age gap too. He would not date someone extremely younger than him. He is not going to be 40 and dating a 19-year-old. I just can't see it.

Other than that, he does not have any preferences when it comes to appearance. He has turn-offs, but not in terms of appearance. He could care less about what someone looks like.

In terms of personality, he dislikes negative people. He despises that. He would feel guilty if he became involved with someone unconcerned about the world. He also dislikes immaturity and pettiness.

He prefers people who bring positivity into his life, you know? Someone much more outgoing than he is, but still a mature person with whom he could relate. The more extroverted they are the more they bring out of him. As long as they're not so overwhelming to him.

Even so, he simply enjoys people for their kindness and consideration. How willing they are, how passionate and motivated they are. He simply wants someone who is driven by their goals.

Texts them dad memes he found on Facebook.

“Look at it, it’s funny.”

“...lol”

“You laughed at least a little bit right?

“...No?”

“Okay. I apologize :(“

LAUGH AT HIS FACEBOOK MEMES PLEASE. THEY ARE NOT THAT BAD PLEASE.

When he met their family, he appeared calm and collected, but he was nervous. He was fidgety on the way to their house, something he had only ever done in high school. He experiences anxiety about whether he would be accepted by them or whether he would be good enough.

“Wow, I have never seen you this fidgety before.”

"I apologize. It’s just… What your family might think worries me. I am not sure if I will meet their expectations. I simply want to let them know how much I genuinely adore you for who you are and how much I want to be yours forever."

And they are like ??? because this man is perfect? He is the dream man anyone could ever ask for.

Do not take this man mini golfing bro he sucks ass… I know you guys think just because he is partly white he will immediately be good at golf but no. He sucks ass.

He would be protective, but not excessively so. He is devoted to his partner and will intervene quickly if someone upsets them, intimidating them with his composed demeanor.

"I advise you to distance yourself from them before I regretfully have to take action, okay? We wouldn’t want that, right?” Dumbledore says, calmly. While puffing out his chest. And mewing. And mogging. Whatever that means.

Okay fine, he will watch Jersey Shore, The Real Housewives, Love & Hip-Hop, etc with them. Pretends to hate it but he is invested.

Imagine just going to the bedroom and just seeing him in his reading glasses, sitting up against the headboard, immersed in the book in front of him. The only thing he has on is a simple white tee that does justice to his figure and pajama pants.

Yup feral.

Tries to get into the things their partner likes just so he can understand when they yap about certain things. He just wants them to talk about everything to him. He finds it adorable.

Allows their partner to give him a skincare treatment. He then begins to do it himself. Well, he would only use one product—a cleanser. That being said, he started using toner, serum, and other skincare products. And, yes, he allows them to put ridiculously cute facemasks on his face. And the cute little star pimple patches.

Do not take that man ice skating or rollerblading either. He would be so hesitant on going because he sucks at it. He just goes because his significant other told him to. He fell immediately.

“This sucks.”

“Stop sulking and hold my hand.”

“...You don’t even need to ask.” He says, all giddy.

Please show him the love and care he deserves.

When he works out he will flex on them on purpose. He thinks it is all funny to be all yummy. It is NOT funny.

Yup, he does push-ups while they’re underneath, each time he goes down he gives them a peck.

Yeah so imagine that with him in his compression shirt and shorts…

I could read your mind, people. You are not slick.

This man will not let his significant other have insecurities. He is the type to leave notes all over the bathroom, and every mirror, with encouraging words. Praising their looks and more. Plus he shows in…other ways (wink) how much he appreciates how beautiful he thinks they are.

If they are unhappy, he will truly be devastated. He is miserable when he sees them upset, so he does everything in his power to cheer them up. Whether that’s cooking something for them, taking care of them, trying to make them laugh, getting them something from the store, or sitting down and talking to them about their problems, he needs to make them feel happy.

When he drives, he would not put his hand on his partner’s thigh. He would much rather grab their hand, and put it on his lap, as he listens to them hum along to the radio. He purposely moves the mirror slightly toward them, just so he can see how pretty they are through the mirror. He also looks at them with a slight smile at every stop-light, occasionally leaving small pecks on their face.

Does not mind if they steal his clothes. Go on then silly. He could care less. He thinks it’s cute as hell.

Would teach them how to do things. For example, he will teach them to play an instrument if they do not already, especially if he knows how. He looks like a lovesick fool as he watches them replicate what he did. Unable to resist the urge, he kisses them without reason.

“What was that for?”

"I could not hold back. You are very tempting."

“Is that a good thing?”

“Yes. You are everything I think about and want."

Butterflies all around people.

His only red flag is that sometimes he may prioritize work over his relationship. He unfortunately gets into the stress of work and begins to grind more at work. Call him out and he gets back into his senses.

Buys more storage space for his Samsung S24 Ultra to retrieve more pictures of them. His camera roll is nearly full. Just because of his significant other, his camera roll increased from roughly 150 images to over 13,000 images.

When he comes home from work, he immediately collapses on the couch or their shared bed, on top of them. He then looks like a sleepy puppy.

“Someone’s tired.”

“I hate overtime.”

“I know you do. I cooked something for you.”

“I could have just cooked for the both of us…”

“But I knew you’d come all tired from work. So no.”

“That doesn't matter, you know? I love taking care of you. Just to see that pretty smile on your face.” He pouts, once again.

He ends up making it up to them. You can interpret that however you want.

As soon as this man sees them in formal attire (or in general) it is OVER. His jaw is on the bottom of the earth, his eyes are slightly widened, a blush on his face.

“I have no words. God, I don't know how someone could get even more impossibly perfect, yet here you are, darling. No matter how many times I see you, you still manage to take my breath away.”

yup heart attack

Prepare for so many compliments daily. He talks like a true romance book. None of that Colleen Hoover stuff.

Talks about his partner like a true gentleman. He's not like those types of guys who just talk about their significant other as if they're his property. No. He talks about them as if they are an art piece.

Overall, he just loves his partner so, so much. He expresses it in a variety of ways, from taking care of them—to telling them every single second of the day. In his own words,

"Your presence in my life is like a breath of fresh air, keeping my heart full and content. I love you more than anyone could ever fathom, and I promise you, you have my heart for eternity."

i love him </3 NANMINPLEAEE BE RELALRHABADHDJSKDHSNEB

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it-happened-one-fic · 4 months

Text

Gluttony - Leona

Author Notes: It was actually really difficult to choose what I was going to post this week. But I've been a little busy lately, so I finally just chose this one rather than working on polishing some of my other fics. I wrote this one to the song "Too Sweet" by Hozier and that most certainly showed in the writing. With that said though, I'm pretty pleased with how this fic turned out. As per usual, reader is gender-neutral. I hope you enjoy!

Type: Gender neutral reader/ fluff/ some angst with comfort/ romance implied/ some pining/ sfw

Word count: 1528

Leona opened his eyes groggily, a frown on his face, as soon as the sun shone down through the leaves of the tree that hung over him, briefly blinding him before he sat up.

A hum from his left had his ears twitching before he twisted to see you lying right by his side. A slight smile on your face as the shadows of the leaves swayed across your form, and he felt his eyebrows raise.

He wasn’t particularly surprised to see you, though he knew the same couldn’t be said for anyone who might have seen you here.

Leona was no fool. He knew that you and him were pretty much perfect opposites. That’s why everyone always looked so confused when you were walking along beside him. Chattering away with a happy expression or teasing him about something that had recently gone in a way he hadn’t planned for it to.

Leona was the hated second prince. It was his burden, and it was one he’d carried his entire life. It was nothing new.

He was bitter, unpleasant, and something that people preferred to avoid either out of fear or powerful levels of distaste.

And then there was you. Sweet and far more optimistic than he thought he could ever be. And perhaps more interestingly, you were no fool. You knew everything wasn’t flowers and dreams. How could you not when you lived in a place like Ramshackle dorm and didn’t even have a way to get home?

You were seemingly trapped in a world that wasn’t your own, but you didn’t let that stop you. Instead, you just keep going with your head held high, a smile on your face, and a laugh on your lips as you shrugged it off. It was admirable.

But it also simply wasn’t him. And that was something he knew perfectly well.

That simple fact was also the exact reason your classmates would find it so odd to see you slumbering here by his side and not somewhere else with someone who was a better match for your sweet disposition.

Leona leaned forward, propping his head on his chin as he looked down at where you slept by his side. You’d come here to study in the botanical garden while he’d slumbered next to you. It was something you often did, though he couldn’t fathom why.

It was almost like you either wanted the company or didn’t want him to be lonely. Either of which was ridiculous, since he could think of plenty of people who’d want to be your study buddy, and he certainly didn't want company for his naps.

But then, Leona also didn’t mind your presence, though he had his own reasons for not running you off.

Leona titled his head slightly, sighing at the sight of you, before pulling the book whose corner was jabbing into your side out of your hands and setting it off to the side where you’d quickly find it after waking up.

He idly scanned the area, half rolling his eyes as he confirmed that your feline companion was nowhere to be seen.

Grim had no doubt long since abandoned you in favor of avoiding anything even close to work.

As for you, Leona didn’t know if you were foolish or bold to have fallen asleep right next to him with no one around to protect you. But here you were curled up at his side, as if he weren’t someone who could easily harm you and were instead someone who would take care of you should you need it.

Which wasn’t something he could really deny to himself, but you didn’t need to know that.

After all, you’d seen him when he’d overblotted and you knew he wasn’t a good person. That should have been enough to send you scrambling to get away from him. But instead, here you were.

And it was ridiculous.

It was true that it might have taken Jack a little while to realize that Leona wasn’t someone he needed to look up to, but Leona’s actions at the Spelldrive competition had cleared up Jack’s misunderstandings about him.

Ruggie had always known what sort of person Leona was. It was one of the reasons he hung around. After all, there was safety in sticking close to people like Leona, so long as you remembered what they were truly like.

Both realized, for better or worse, that Leona was not a misunderstood individual who was secretly good. He was jaded, always beaten by others, and essentially worthless.

But then there was you, who was seemingly unbothered by any of this.

And it wasn’t even like you didn’t believe Leona’s flaws existed; he could work with that. Instead, it was almost like you didn’t care. Like you didn’t really expect him to change outside of your occasional prodding for him to take better care of himself.

You saw his flaws—that much he knew from the times you had bickered with him over something—but you just seemed to accept them. The same way you just seemed to accept other people’s flaws as something that was just a part of them. Only ever really scolding others, or even Leona himself, when their actions either harmed themselves or others.

And that's how Leona knew you were simply too sweet for him. Too sweet for him to endure being near, but simultaneously too sweet for him to turn away.

It was just another show of how worthless he was at anything he tried to do and how little his own efforts mattered. He could try to push you away, but he couldn’t ever stop himself from clinging to you.

As if you were one of the last sweet bits of his otherwise bitter life. A potent method of making everything else seem to fall away and be ignored so long as he just gets a fleeting taste of that kindness.

And Leona had tried to ignore you, but it was somehow impossible, even when he knew that being close to him could easily taint that sweetness of yours and turn it into a bitterness more like his.

But Leona also knew that you and him were all but opposites, and that was probably where the attraction of being near you lay.

Though that realization did nothing to lessen that attraction, no matter how frustrating it might be.

You shifted, letting out some sort of groggy sound and causing him to snort in amusement at your lethargic movements that had you shifting closer to him as if you craved his warmth. Coming closer to him instead of distancing yourself like you should.

It was ridiculous, watching you now, to think that you’d somehow bested him in the past. But you had. You’d beaten him as well as numerous others at their own game. Making them look like fools, as you seemed to change things simply by existing.

And maybe you did. After all, you weren’t of this world. And perhaps that was why it was so hard for him to detach himself from you.

Your eyes fluttered open, and you twisted to look up at the lion beastman, who didn’t even bother hiding his amusement as you blinked up at him before groggily sitting up, “What time is it?”

Leona glanced around, his ears twitching slightly as he listened to the distant sounds of students chattering as they left their club areas before he looked back your way, “Time to be getting back to the dorms. Club practice has already let out.”

You nodded, not looking terribly surprised and seemingly resigned to having lost the rest of your study period.

“Have you seen Grim?” You frowned lightly as you glanced around, and Leona snorted, leaning back and relaxing once more against the ground, lazily watching you as you collected your books.

“Nope,” At the single word you glanced over at him with raised eyebrows that almost made him want to take back all the previous thoughts he’d had about you being sweet.

But then that tiny bit of bite you had to you only ever seemed to emphasize your sweetness. It was what kept you interesting and at odds with the fools at RSA.

Because, unlike them, you managed to have a certain degree of cunning even with your sweetness. After all, he hadn’t been lying that day when he’d told Azul that you were far more dastardly than the scheming cephalo-punk was.

That was probably another reason why Leona had given up on pushing you away and had even come to expect your presence. He was a glutton for punishment, and with you being a villain that was sweet enough to even catch him unawares, you were certainly enough to keep him on his toes.

His gaze held yours even as he felt yet another chip in the wall of his defenses fall away, despite the fact that he’d always maintained these walls around himself.

He may not want to let you in, but you really were too sweet for him, and it was reaching the point that Leona was becoming more and more willing to let himself give into his gluttony.

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writingmeraki · 1 year

Text

you're no good for me.

a min ho oneshot !

summary : five times you thought he didn't care and the one time he showed you he did.

( or five times you were oblivious to how much he truly cared and the one time he made it obvious. )

genre : angst ( a bit? ) fluff, comedy ( attempts )

pairing : minho x gn!reader, e2l, frenemies to lovers! idiots to lovers!

warnings : cussing, descriptions of blood,injuries and bruises, reader is pretty oblivious, mentions of underage drinking, kissing, kinda messy :/

author's note : i don't even know what to say tbh ? this is so much longer than I thought to the point where I think I may have rushed the ending lmfaoooooooo welp I hope u enjoy this still haha <3 sorry for the wait 🤕🤕🤕 ( my own lovers to enemies arc with this fic bcoz I overthought as usual ) let me know what you think !!! also anon pls the angst was less but like it was a v lighthearted fic from the beginning asdfgh- i still hope u like it 😔<3 also also i kinda have a little drabble as a continuation for this but I'll see if i wanna post it based on your feedback hehe so let me know! ( barely proofread <3 )

word count : 11.6K ( longest oneshot i've ever written omll )

based on this request !

THE FIRST TIME.

"Fuck why do I feel like someone just pounded my head with a hammer?!"

You groaned as you woke up from your sleep or rather lack of sleep. You'd only been able to get barely 2 hours of sleep when you'd gotten back from the party last night

A party that you didn't even want to go to but were emotionally blackmailed to and even worse it was fucking Minho's party.

Technically, it's his fault you're in this state of crankiness.

You were sitting up on your bed, hair in all directions as you nursed the headache you'd gotten. Lack of sleep really gave you the worst of headaches and it didn't help you'd drunk a little, not more than a few sips, but the after-effect was definitely there.

You hissed as your bare feet touched the cold floor before you finally found your fuzzy bunny slippers you'd gotten as a gift from Kitty.

You dragged yourself out of your room, now being able to make out people talking on the other side.

"Well look who we have here looking like an absolute angel."

"Shut it Minho."

The retort came out like second nature as Minho smirked at your state despite the tiny concern that flashed across his face when he saw you holding your head as you sat on the floor between Kitty and Q who only shared a look when they definitely didn't miss that flash of concern.

You looked at Q, questioning "So why are we having a family meeting here?"

"We were just having a discussion about weird dreams." Kitty answered you and you looked at her, humming and suddenly a light bulb lit up from your only two alive braincells.

"You had a sex dream." Both Q and you said at the same time, him sitting up while a smirk just formed on your face.

"Was it about Dae?" Q asked holding his coffee in his hand. Kitty's eyes widened and shook her head immediately.

"So it wasn't about Dae, huh." You said as you wondered, your slightly swollen eyes blinking in thought.

"No! No I didn't say I had a sex dream." Kitty tried defending herself.

You lightly snorted, yawning a bit, "You didn't have to though."

"Exactly now spill." Q continued and you noticed movement from behind and saw Minho coming, with three mugs in his hand, handing one to Kitty and one to you.

He was oddly quiet and stiff, now wondering what made him like that because he'd definitely would have said something snarky by now.

"-dreams don't mean anything!" Kitty's voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you sipped your coffee skeptically hoping it's not poisoined, but you hummed in satisfaction at the sweetness that contrasted the bitterness.

It was exactly how you liked it. Not too bitter like how people would usually drink it, you preferred it sweet because you had a huge sweet tooth.

Minho's gaze shifted towards you, recalling something as he swallowed nervously when he saw the small grin on your face.

"She's right! They don't mean anything." He suddenly looked towards Q who was already looking at him with his eyebrows raised, sipping his own cup.

Your eyes opened and you lazily looked at Minho, whose body language seemed even more stiff now.

"You could have a sex dream about someone you've repulsed your whole life." You looked in confusion at his words, one eyebrow raised.

Kitty agreed "Yes, yes exactly thank you Minho."

"He could have a sex dream about someone like…Y/N!"

You almost choked on your coffee before you spat out what was in your mouth, as Minho had a similar reaction.

"So you had a sex dream about Y/N." Q said as if it was the most obvious thing and you looked at him in horror.

"Hello?? Why are you talking about me as if I'm literally not here?" You were ignored as Minho quickly defended himself,

"No I didn't." He said, avoiding looking at you as you continued to stare at him with your eyes widened.

"And if I did have a sex dream about Y/N, it'd be a sex nightmare." You scoffed at his words while Kitty whispered Oh my God.

"Please, you'd be lucky to even have me in your dreams let alone real life." You spoke before you could think about it.

"So you still had sex?" Q piped up and Minho quickly blurted,

"Dreams don't mean anything! Besides I hate Y/N!" He said sparing a glance at you who just seemed confused at where this conversation had led up to.

"Wait a minute-"

"We're getting late! I still uh need to get ready!" Minho said turning around before you could even question anything, not being able to see how red his face had gotten as he ran to his room and slammed the door shut.

Blinking once and twice, you looked at Kitty and Q,

"So can someone just tell me what happened?"

They indeed didn't tell you anything, or rather didn't get a chance to before the door was knocked on and in came in your advisor, telling you about how you all had gotten Saturday detention and hoped last night was worth it.

You groaned as he left, holding the cup of coffee mumbling curse words. The same cup of coffee, that was exactly how you liked it, that was made by Minho. Something you didn't even realize how he knew your perfect order.

THE SECOND TIME.

You'd rather be watching paint dry than be in this boring detention.

Saturday flew in and in no time, were you already sitting in the library for your eight hour detention.

You groaned as you leaned forward, wanting to drop your head on the table before a hand placed itself between it and the hard surface of the table, making you hit it softly and for a second you thought about how warm it felt.

"You'll damage the tiny amount of brain cells you have in there." Minho's voice mocked you, as you looked up, your chin laying on his hand.

Glaring, you didn't even realise how he gulped at how you'd still maintain physical contact by not lifting your head up.

"Screw you." You scoffed, sitting straight up,

"Why am I even sitting with you?" You questioned crossing your arms and the scowl didn't leave your face.

"Maybe you finally realized how obsessed you are with me and felt like you had to be closer to me." He said with that annoying smirk plastered on his face.

You snorted, "Please it's only because it was the only seat available!"

The smirk didn't leave his face, only growing wider as he leaned in to whisper in your ear,

"All I'm hearing is excuses." His voice rang in your ears, noticing the rasp and how deep it sounded, swallowing nervously, you didn't know why you felt like your heart would jump out of your chest.

You leaned away from him, rolling your eyes, brushing away what you felt as irritation from being around Minho too much.

You shivered due to the temperature in the library being too low for your liking, the air conditioning being colder than you would have kept it.

You internally cussed at yourself for wearing a crop top instead of bringing an extra sweater with you,forgetting it's usually chilly in there.

Minho noticed the shiver, rolling his eyes, he suddenly began taking off his own bomber jacket. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion but they relaxed when you felt a sudden warmth engulf you.

"You'll catch a cold and it'll end up infecting everyone." He scolded you before you could even say anything, words dying down before you could even question his actions, too stunned.

You just blinked at him, mumbling a small thanks to which he just sent you a curt nod, his attention back to the doodling he'd been doing in his book.

"Did he just-"

"Yes. Yeah he did."

Kitty questioned to which Yuri answered both stunned at what they'd just seen.

"Don't they, I don't know, hate each other?" Yuri asks, confused looking back at Kitty.

"Guess hate and love are two sides of the same coin, afterall huh?" Kitty spoke up.

They both paused and looked at each other, bursting out in giggles.

THE THIRD TIME.

You stared at the clock, your eyes fixated on the minute hand that moved agonizingly slow, your head resting on the palm of your chin that was using your right arm as a stand.

You sighed mumbling to yourself about how time seemed to be against you.

“Instead of boring your eyes into the clock, maybe if you paid attention to what was being taught, your tiny brain could finally excel in this.”

You rolled your eyes and turned your head towards the boy who sat beside you.

Pausing a bit when you realised how the sunlight from the window literally made it seem like he glowed, his cheekbones highlighted by it and his lips seemingly more plump and pinker as he spoke.

Minho’s attentions wasn’t on you though, at least it would seem like that because he was staring ahead, his focus on his notes as he wrote what was being taught, his hands splayed across his notebooks.

Even when he sat, you noticed he still seemed taller than you. Sometimes you even wonder how you always end up next to him.

“I’d say take a photo and it would last longer but I’m pretty sure you already have enough of those with you, stalker.” He said, taking a peak at you from the corner of his eyes, a smirk forming on his face when he saw you scoffing.

“As if, besides since when did you care about me paying attention or not.” Minho stopped for a second at your words, hand freezing mid way from his note taking and it was now his turn to roll his eyes at you.

“Because you’re a distraction.” He spoke lowly, making sure you were the only one who heard, and only now you noticed you’d both been murmuring amongst each other as if you were friends just gossiping.

Not wanting to argue more, you just sighed and looked ahead,

“Ugh, whatever.”

You looked down at your own notebook, narrowing your eyes when you saw you’d only written half a page and stealing a glance at Minho’s, your eyes now widening when you counted that he was already on what seemed like his third page.

Damn I really must have zoned out.

Now you just thought of your options, either you skip some pages and just write what was being taught at the moment, finishing what you missed afterwards.

Clicking your tongue, you just closed your notebook, slightly pushing it away. Knowing being at the way back in a crowded classroom was helpful at times like this but having Alex as your professor being another advantage, you folded your arms on the table and plopped your head onto it sideways.

You sighed, relieved at the position, even though it may seem uncomfortable, but at the time, it felt just right.

You shut your eyes, the last thing you saw being Mingo from the way you had positioned your head, with you facing towards him and let yourself be surrounded by the temporary darkness.

“So you’re just going to sleep during the lecture?”

“Yep.” You said still with your eyes closed.

“I barely got any, considering the Vampire Diaries marathon Kitty and I had last night.”

You mumbled, feeling yourself give in to your dreamland.

“You both are terrible roommates because who even has a series marathon in the middle of a school week?” Minho asked you scoffing, turning his head to his left so he could look down at you.

You opened one eye and put your tongue out childishly to mock him,

“Only the fun kind of roommates, now shut up and do your work, let me sleep.”

“You seriously need to be more responsible, I mean come on, you have dark circles right now.” He whisper yelled as he scanned your face.

“Okay mum. I’ll make sure of it.” You murmured to him, the last of your words being softer as you finally gave in to your dreams.

Minho sighed when he heard you exhale softly, seeing the way the sun reflected on your face.

He wondered how you could just fall asleep but then again he knew you’d probably stayed awake just to give company because he knew you didn’t even like The Vampire Diaries.

You’d once told how lame you found it that the only relevant plot was two brothers fighting for a girl, and how it was ridiculously stupid.

He moved his body a bit forward, so that the sunlight could not fall on your face, and upon that the scrunch in your brows relieved unconsciously. He reached his hand forward to tuck away the hair piece that seemed to bother you. His fingertips lingering on your cheek and you leaned into the touch unknowingly.

Pulling his hand away, he gently smiled at you, shaking his head fondly as he brought back his attention to what was being taught.

[ a few moments later ]

“Wake up sleeping beauty, it’s time.” You heard as you felt someone flick your forehead.

Groaning you swatted away the hand, as you slowly rose up, rubbing your eyes, and blinking a few times as you tried recalling who you were and where you were.

“Seems like someone’s nap time was well.” Minho smirked at you, packing his books away to which you turned to him and glared.

“Hope you dreamt of me well!” He said a grin on his face now as your lips pulled into a thin line.

“Yeah it’d be more of a nightmare if you showed up in my dreams.” You said rolling your eyes, and gathering your own notebook, realising it was pretty pointless to have even removed it today as you basically barely wrote anything.

You pulled your bag up to the desk and tucked away your book.

Minho slid a book towards you, making you pause your movements as you glanced at him in question.

“Here, today’s class work and homework as well, if you don’t get something, considering you probably won’t, come to the library after school is over.” He said standing up, to which you still looked between him and the book in question, skeptical of his sudden act of…kindness?

“Stop staring idiot, you’ll get late.” He said as he slowly walked away, you thought about it and grabbed his notebook, putting it in between your own and standing up, sliding one strap on your shoulder.

“Thank…you?” You said turning around noticing he was already gone.

Huh, weird. Well that was nice of him…for once.

You shook your head, walking out as well, realizing you indeed learn something new about him every time.

THE FOURTH TIME.

It was another outing of the nature club you'd join in support of Kitty's new venture of wanting to do new things.

Although initially, you'd reluctantly agreed but you'd learn to enjoy it once you spent more times with nature.

Though sometimes you wish you could just jump off the cliff because lo and behold, Minho had also spontaneously joined it as well.

Over time, you'd just learnt to ignore his shit, just paying attention to your surroundings and focusing all your energy on that.

You didn't even notice how he'd always be trailing beside you though, since the beginning of it actually.

But of course those around you did.

Q and Dae looked at their best friend, both wondering the same thing.

"Do you think he notices?" Dae asked as they hiked up, Q looked at him in question and followed his gaze, perceiving what he meant.

“He is still in denial as to why he even joined this club in the first place, remember how much I tried convincing him to join but he always refused with bullshit excuses but suddenly when Y/N joins, he’s apparently thought about it well and understood it was good to be one with nature, hence why he would be joining.”

Dae shook his head, chuckling as he recalled the denial on his face from when they confronted him about it.

“I don’t even think he realizes that Q, let alone how he always seems to be beside them when he gets the chance.” Dae said, staring at the pair of you, you seemed more than happy to be there as Minho skeptically walked beside you.

Suddenly an arm was placed in front of you, making you suddenly freeze in your place and your gaze followed it to the owner, confusion flooding your mind as you looked at Minho in question.

He moved in front of you and knelt down on one knee, to which your eyes widened and you looked around to see if anyone else was seeing this.

Hissing at him, more so in confusion, "What the hell are you doing?"

He scoffed and pointed down at your shoes, more so your shoe laces.

"You'll literally trip on them and fall on your face resulting in you getting hurt and you'll end up causing problems."

Once again, your mouth gaped at him as he went back to his task which was tying your shoelaces.

At times, he truly did confuse the ever living fuck out of you. Because for one he'd be doing the nicest things but then the gesture would be contradicting with what he would have to say afterwards.

You noticed how strands of his hair moved out of place as a result of him looking down to focus on tying your laces.

You bit your lip to control the smile from spreading on your face and he got up, dusting his hands.

"You know you should be grateful that I decided to be with you right now otherwise your clumsy ass would have probably broken a foot by now."

There it was. The contradicting words to his gestures.

Not wanting to start an argument, you just sighed and shook your head, mumbling a thanks as you walked ahead, having been left behind by a few paces.

Minho glared at you, taking a few steps to catch up with you,

"That was mean of you." He said and you took a side glance at him to see a frown on his face and you sighed once again,

"Thank you so much Minho, whatever would I have done if it weren't for your presence."

You grinned widely, blinking your eyes forcefully as you fluttered your eyelashes.

Before he could speak again, you turned forward and rolled your eyes, continuing your hike.

When you reached the top view, you could see the entire city of Seoul and just how mesmerizing it looked.

As a whole it looked breathtaking, the tall buildings and the miniature figures doing about their own things, the sky's colours contrasting the shades, the sun setting slowly as the last warmth of it bled on your face.

You didn't even notice Minho was right beside you, admiring the city view as well. Though his eyes naturally drifted towards you, even if he never wanted them to but it seemed like second nature to him now, his eyes finding you anytime you were around.

Your own sparked as you took in the little details of the view, unknowingly a smile forming on your face making the tiny depths form on your cheeks. Your hair slightly moving from the soft breeze and you'd laugh at the timing but you didn't notice that as you were too in your own world.

Blinking, he felt his own heart flutter as he whispered so tenderly, you probably wouldn't have heard him if he weren't next to you,

"Beautiful, you really are beautiful."

Looking beside you, you were once again left speechless when you saw who it was, and pretended you didn't hear, asking

"Sorry what was that?"

That seemed to snap him out of his gaze as he looked in front, coughing into his hand, sounding more fake than real,

"Uh, I meant that the view is really beautiful! Yeah the view…" He looked to the other side to make sure you wouldn't see the redness forming on his face.

You just nodded at him, turning your attention back in front of you,

"It is, isn't it? It was definitely worth the hike!"

You beamed as you put your hands on your hips, happy with the end result of the exhausting hike.

"Anyways we should be heading down now, if we were to reach before nightfall."

You paused looking around and found Q and Dae already looking at you both, you waved them over.

"Q! Dae! Why didn't I see both during the hike up?"

"Maybe cause someone wouldn't leave you and your attention was on him mostly." Q murmured to which, luckily you didn't seem to catch what he said as you raised an eyebrow.

Dae nudged Q with his elbow on his stomach, to which Q hissed in a little pain.

"That was so unnecessary!" Dae still kept his smile,

"What he meant was, you seem preoccupied but really we were trailing behind too." He told, his eyes shifting to Minho's for one second when he said preoccupied and you noticed this.

"Well let's all go together for the hike down?"

Minho wanted to protest but he realised it'd probably seem suspicious and knowing how his best friends were, they'd figure it and look into this more than he would like them too.

Plus he wasn't entirely sure why he detested the idea of not being able to be with you only for the hike down.

He hated your guts didn't he? He only just…taught you were too clumsy and stupid, as well as unserious.

At least that was what he kept convincing himself, yet it was far more obvious to everyone around you except yourselves that there was definitely more than just animosity.

And as you began going down the steps, you almost tripped as your leg got caught in a root but lucky for you, there was Minho by your other side, who'd pulled your arm to make sure you didn't fall right on your face.

"Seriously if it weren't for me, you'd probably end up dead by now."

His hand still on your arm, the contact making you feel warmer than you should and for a second your eyes drifted towards his lips as you thought about just how close you were to him.

You pulled away your arm and gulped, nodding at his words nonchalantly as you couldn't get the image of his lips out of your mind, as much as you hated it.

Q and Dae again, shared a look as if silently communicating,

Yep, there's more to this than just animosity.

THE FIFTH TIME.

Frowning at the big red F on your Korean Literature test, you felt like bursting into tears.

Really it wasn't your fault you were bad at adjusting to the language, after all it'd only been a few months since you were taught about it afresh.

Kitty sighed at your frowny face, texting your shared group chat about canceling today's movie night for the time being, your phone on silent since you'd gotten the test.

kitty loml 💗 : guys no movie night today, y/n's not feeling too well :((((

You didn't even notice it but Minho immediately texted in the group chat when he read the message.

minhoe 👹 : what happened????

dae my bae 🥳 : wow look who spawned in this "lame gc" 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔

👑 : ohhh he's right tho but srsly what happened? are they alright???

kitty loml 💗 : Korean Lit happened 😶

👑 : Ohhhh yikes.

Kitty set aside her phone and looked back at you before you spoke,

"What am I doing wrong? I'm trying my best and it just seems pointless now." You feel tears of frustration forming as you yanked the paper away because it just seemed like the red mark was taunting you.

"Y/N, you know it's not your fault, Korean is really hard to learn afresh and see your Korean is way better than mine already!"

She tried cheering you up and you just shook your head.

"No Kitty, I've been learning this longer than you have and it's not even helping me at all if this is the end result!" You wiped harshly at the tears that poured out, your voice snapping at the end.

You sighed as you saw Kitty flinch, not in fear but more so in surprise because she didn't expect you to snap, yet she knew everyone had their own days.

Exhaling softy, you spoke "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap, I'll just…I'm going to take a shower to cool down."

Before she could reply, you turned away, walking to your room, before you slammed your door shut harsher than you wished.

👑 : how's the situation?

kitty loml 💗 : wellll they've gone to take a shower now, but they are pretty upset.

👑 : oh that's not great.

minhoe 👹 : wait guys, what flavour of Pocky was their favourite again? Cookies and cream or chocolate?

kitty loml 💗 : y r u asking this out of nowhere and I'm pretty sure it's just plain chocolate.

dae my bae 🥳 : oh wait didn't you read the previous messages? anyways it was a pretty long thing but in short Minho went to the grocery store to get some snacks for Y/N cause he's "sure" they haven't eaten yet because of how 'forgetful" they are

👑 : code for comfort snacks for an upset y/n to make them feel better because i care but won't admit it.

minhoe 👹 : gosh you all are do fuckinf annoying

kitty loml 💗 : and you are so fucking whipped

👑 : oop pretty sure i can see him blushing all the way from here

dae my bae 🥳 : he just cussed out loud and now we're getting glared at by some grandma, good going minHOE 👹

slayest of the slayers 🙏 : lol

👑 : OMGFJZJZ HIII HELLO R U OKAYY???

kitty loml 💗 : i thought the giggles were me going insane but it was you okay.

slayest of the slayers 🙏 : one way to say i live in ur mind 😈😈 and yes Q, i am fine for now at least, I'll figure out how to conqure this stupid subject somehow.

minhoe 👹 : plzzz it'd be like having a demon in ur head

👑 : YOU shouldn't say that when y/n is probably in ur mind all day and also feel free to message any of us for help when u need it!

You turned off your phone, laughing as you heard the notifications in your group chat blow up.

You'd gotten out of the shower, feeling way better than you had but still just choosing to lay in your bed when you noticed your notifications were piling up.

You giggled when you read through the chats, intervening and feeling your heart at ease when you thought about your friends worrying over you and checking up on you.

You were grateful to have found them, especially considering you were so new and awkward when you joined KISS, thinking you'd never make friends but now you could proudly say you loved them with all you had.

Though as you laid, gazing up at the celing lit up with lights from outside, you thought of one particular person whose actions nowadays made you more confused than anything.

It was Minho, of course.

Lately it seemed he'd taken a place in your mind, ironically having flashbacks to your conversation in the group chat about you occupying his mind but it was more of the opposite on your side.

At least that was what you thought.

You thought over every gesture of his, everytime he seemed to show he cared but then you recalled his harsh words those times and stepped back a bit from your fantasies.

He was too different anyways, a star out of your reach, a boundary you feared to cross, a line that was the more blatant.

So why did your heart feel heavier at the idea of him being out of league?

You gulped when you mentally weighed your options, closing your eyes and thinking of his annoying smirk but even more his annoyingly pretty smile that was rare but when you did see it, it did something to you that made you feel all fuzzy. His annoying hair that always had strands misplaced which you always itched the urged to tuck them back gently, his soft lips, his eyes-

A knock on your door woke you up and you got up putting your hand on your chest.

The pattering in it making it feel like you just ran a whole marathon.

You rose up and quietly walked to your door.

You think you almost puked your guts out of nervousness when you saw who was on the other end.

"You need to check on your messaging skills." You stayed frozen as Minho pushed you aside and entered your room as though he owned the place. It was like something he had that once he entered a room, it naturally became his place.

You noticed he had a bag of something in his hands and you remembered the texts in the group chats.

"Oh wait, did you really?" You asked pointing towards the bag,as he plopped down on your bed, looking at you while rolling his eyes.

"Of course, I know you'd probably starve yourself if you could, that's why I bought something for you." He said and you made your way towards him, a little skeptical and your nerves didn't seem to have calmed.

You sat down beside him, a bit of distance between you two yet you still felt a bit dizzy considering this was probably the first time he'd been in your room.

He pushed the bag towards you, looking at you expectantly.

"Here, it's mostly what you like, as far as I know." You looked through the assortment and indeed, it was like all of your favourites in one.

Your mind couldn't wrap around the fact that it was Minho out of everyone that remembered all your favorite snacks. A little detail but you found it fluttering when someone would remember the smallest things about you. Only this time it felt like your heart would jump out of your chest as you thought about this.

"Well, are you feeling better now?" You snapped your head towards him, nodding absentmindedly.

"Look. Since I am feeling nice, I'll help you out. I can tutor you between 5-7 every Wednesday and Friday at the library. I checked your schedule and saw you were also free those days-"

"Wait what? Where did you even get my schedule???" You genuinely asked confused trying to comprehend his words.

"Out of all that, that's what you want to know?" Rolling his eyes, he crossed his arms "I saw it during the start of the year, to see which classes I'd have to tolerate you in and mentally prepare myself for."

"..." You narrowed your eyes at him suspiciously.

"Oh…Kay?" You said more so questionably, wondering if you'd ever invest your time in someone like that, especially if it were someone you don't like.

He got up to leave, not wanting to embarrass himself more than he thought he did.

"Well uh…I am gonna go now, don't be late! Or I swear I'm never doing anything nice for your dumbass ever again!Don't forget to eat those, seriously I spent money and my precious time in those." He rushed to your door, turning back one last time to you.

"...Just…just next time, ask for help when you need it alright? And it's okay to not do well at times even if you do your best, sometimes it's not your fault." He looked at you expectantly to which you just nodded, still flabbergasted by his actions since he arrived.

He gave one last nod and turned around, slamming the door closed.

What the fuck just happened ?

You asked more so to yourself as you looked the bag in your hands, Minho's words ringing in your head, him offering to tutor you, actually telling you he'd be tutoring you.

Just him. Him and his…kind gestures?

You groaned, setting the bag down beside your bed and falling flat on your bed.

You stared at the ceiling looking for answers for questions you didn't even know about.

And suddenly a sentence rang through your mind.

Gasping loudly as you sat up, wide eyed as an epiphany hit you,

Fuck.

I think I like him.

I like Minho.

THAT ONE TIME.

As a normal person would when they come to be able to identify the confusion and chaos their mind was in and why they were in that state, you did one thing.

Avoid it and the cause of it.

In other words, as a way to deal with the realization of your liking, you decided to just avoid Minho at all costs, at least until it would come to bite you eventually.

You knew your friends noticed your behavior, how you'd basically changed routes and even certain classes, pouring excuses like you couldn't study during that time and it was better to change.

The new revelation caused a lot of changes in the way you saw of his actions. It definitely didn't help when you would recall at the times he'd done them late in the night and it would leave you with a hope that was only growing higher.

Only to come crashing down when you would think about how he might not even see you in the same way, maybe it was just as a friend.

Frenemies.

A term you learnt and as much as you felt like it certainly fit your dynamic, it still left a bitter afterthought that you hated because you knew you wanted more.

Much more.

As you sat down in a cafeteria in Seoul to study, yes you'd gone that far as to avoid studying at the campus just to avoid bumping into Minho.

And to your misfortune,Minho did notice though, how you didn't show up to the library for your planned study session that you'd confirmed but cancelled last minute, how you didn't even reply to messages in the group chat, excuses like you were busy with work and assignments.

He'd scoff when you pulled that excuse, as if you weren't in the same grade and didn't have the same workload. When he would ask Kitty or Q or anyone actually, they'd also have similar answers, not knowing where you were or you were locked in your room most of the time when Kitty would come to ask you for anything.

You felt guilty for avoiding your friends like that, even Minho didn't deserve that especially considering he'd even offered to help you.

With a sigh, you opened your books and tried to study at least until it was near time to go back to your dorms.

[ a few hours later ]

After a somewhat successful study session of you attempting to finish your Korea Lit assignment that'd been eating your brains quite literally as you felt a headache forming when you realized you didn't understand anything, you decided you had enough.

Groaning exhaustedly, you winded up your books and packed them, deciding it was time to just head back, frankly there'd been so much on your mind you were pretty sure that was probably one of the major reasons you didn't understand anything academic related.

Or you were just terrible at Korean Literature and really should have just stepped in your ego and crushed it when Minho offered to help you and gone to his tutoring lessons.

But noo you just had to have an epiphany that you really liked him, in a romantic way that same day he offered.

Deciding you deserved some kind of reward for tolerating and trying at least, you took a little detour to the grocery store that was along the way.

Purchasing a lychee moju moju along with some small snacks to eat, you quickly rushed to head back to campus before Kitty came back to your dorms from the library.

Memorizing her schedule so as to know when to avoid her became a part of your routine, a benefit was it was quite similar to the rest of them so you could also avoid them all at once. At least until you were ready.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn't even notice something in front of you until it was too late.

And when you took a step and a loud hiss followed that scared you so bad,you literally tripped on your own feet and fell straight to the hard concrete, face first.

Luckily you'd been able to divert your face sideways so to make sure there'd be less of an impact on your precious nose.

Now it was your turn to hiss as you groaned, rising on your hands to get up slowly.

The right side of your face was the one that had contact with the ground so it hurt like a fucking bitch when you tried to move.

As you rose up to your feet, you caressed the side of your injured face and winced when you felt something warm and wet.

Sighing exhaustedly when you indeed saw it was blood.

You're such a clumsy ass.

Words unknowingly flashed in your mind, words that a certain someone once told you and back then you were annoyed but now you felt that they really were right.

As much as it hurts your ego to admit that.

Suddenly you saw something small moving in the corner of your eye, the street being lit up only by street lights placed around five meters apart.

As you moved closer, you hoped this wasn't a grave mistake and you were not walking to your own death.

As you removed your phone from your left pocket to flash your flashlight because it had been in an area where the streetlight did not cover the range hence it was sort of dark.

You braced yourself for the worse,

Okay calm down, you can run for it and you'll save your—

Wait.

What?

You deadpanned once you saw what was hidden in the dark.

It was a cat.

A brown and black one and it was caressing its tail, hissing at you once you flashed your phone at it.

You connected the dots and sighed in relief, knowing it wasn't a murderer and it wasn't a trap; rather you had likely stepped on its tail when you didn't notice it in front of you due to its color being less visible in the dark spot.

A sense of guilt crept up on you when you thought about how you must have hurt it, even if it was unintentionally.

Deciding you'd help it, at least by giving it something to eat, you grabbed your grocery bag that sadly laid out splayed out.

Knowing you didn't have anything cat friendly to feed, you pointed at it as if talking to it.

"I'll be back! Stay here."

Turning around and making a second round trip to the grocery store, not even realizing it was nearing dangerously close to your curfew.

You didn't even notice the look of pure concern on the cashier's face, having forgotten your injuries both as a result of adrenaline basically numbing the pain and also you being in a hurry when you noted the time.

Surprisingly the cat was still in its spot, eyes closed and sitting with its head tilted who you knelt down to it.

You opened the can of tuna and your nose scrunched in disgust at the smell, but someone else was delighted as it leaned forward immediately.

Chuckling at the cat's eagerness, you placed it on the ground and it dived right in, devouring the tuna.

"You probably haven't eaten in a while huh?"

Gazing at the cat with sympathy and speaking as if the cat would understand you, you sighed sadly.

As one would when seeing a cat, you moved your hand to pet its head, but just as you were about to touch it, it decided you were the enemy.

Hissing at you, you didn't even get to avoid it when it swiped it's paw at your hand.

It wasn't too deep, but it definitely left a mark and oh it also definitely hurt, burned as well.

You pulled your hand, seeing the scratch mark deep enough to draw blood and once again groaned in pain.

The swipe was right on your fingers, moving across from your index to your pinky.

And it was beginning to bleed fast.

"Wow so you definitely aren't fond of physical affection." Wincing in pain as now it began to burn even more, you moved behind, pushing the can with your uninjured hand.

"Fine fine I'll leave you be." You told it gently, noticing it had retreated behind.

You got up while pressing your palm to the scratched fingers, making sure it wouldn't just began bleeding badly out of nowhere.

Shit I probably don't even have a first aid kit.

Today could not get any worse.

And you probably jinxed that as you looked the wristwatch in your left hand for the time.

8:45 pm

A whole twenty minutes passed curfew.

Fuck, you were so screwed now.

You facepalmed yourself only to almost scream in pain as you accidentally hit the right side of your injured forehead.

Great I probably look like I got beat up.

You began walking as fast as you could, your bag seeming heavier as you'd stuff everything including your grocery into it.

Please please please let the advisor not be there right now for checking.

As you reached the gates, you sighed in relief seeing they were still open but slowed down to see if there were any guards around.

It felt like you were suddenly thrown into a secret mission, one to avoid getting caught and possibly getting a suspension for being out so late.

Your wound had stopped bleeding profusely when you'd pulled the sleeve of your sweater over it, engulfing your hand completely.

It pained you to ruin that sweater but you could just buy a new one, hopefully.

Hiding behind a streetlight that was a few meters away from the gatez you scanned your surroundings ahead.

You could almost hear the James Bond theme music playing in your head.

You didn't spot any guards around and the gate was open, so you did the one thing only a true spy could possibly dare to do.

Make a run for it.

Ducking your head down and using the sleeve of your sweater to cover your face, you ran as fast as you could inside, trying to make as minimal noise as you could.

That was not the case when the grovel beneath crunched as you made a run for it and you cussed at yourself internally, praying no one was around.

Lucky for you, your dorm was nearer to the entrance and you felt like bursting out in tears of joy when you neared the building.

Running up the steps, you paid no mind to anyone around you.

"Wait, is anyone still out?! It's almost nine come on guys!"

Eyes widening when you realized you made a grave mistake assuming no one was in the hallways, you turned the opposite direction of your room as footsteps began nearing.

Shit, I need to hide.

Being in this crisis was possibly the worst rotten cherry on top of your nightmarish sundae.

Suddenly, you registered this wasn't your hallway, heck you'd entered the wrong building in a moment of stupidity.

This was the boys dorm building when you noticed the familiar numbers.

Wait a minute.

Your eyes scanned for a number you'd seen countless times by now as you slowly but quickly moved ahead. The footsteps had gotten slow and you knew Alex was in the other hallway, probably looking for who was around.

Grinning when the familiar number was on the door, you didn't think much and just knocked harshly.

"Q! It's Y/N, I'll explain everything but please I'll get caught if you don't open right now!"

Whispering harshly into the door in a panicky tone, you knocked rapidly making sure it wasn't too loud.

You were sure your heart almost dropped out of your chest when you heard the footsteps approaching your direction again.

Your hand dropped to your side as you looked in the direction of Alex heading and you didn't even realize the door had already opened.

You almost yelped so loudly when you felt a tug on your arm pulling you inside. The grip on your arm was strong enough to just drag you inside and you closed your eyes out of fear.

You were pinned behind the door, your back pressing into it as a large hand covered your hand to prevent the yelp out of your mouth. The person's other hand was on your waist to prevent you from falling straight to the ground.

You listened closely to the footsteps and sighed in temporary relief when they passed the dorm.

Only now did you grimace in pain,the hand on your mouth unknowingly hurting the injuries on your face,you reached your hand to tug it out of your face.

The person immediately backed away the moment you grimaced, it was so quick as if they'd been burnt by you. You almost fell over as you'd lean your entire weight on them.

"What the actual fuck happened to you?"

A familiar voice asked in both astonishment and even a hint of anger.

Your eyes were still shut, collecting yourself before you opened them as you relaxed briefly.

You had to blink twice when you noticed who was in front of you.

"Oh…it's you." You murmured, looking anywhere else but at Minho the moment you perceived it was him the whole time.

He scanned your entire face, obviously noticing the blood as well as the bruise, as his eyes lowered, he also saw the blood on your sweater sleeve, your hand now free and the visible marks bleeding once again from being exposed to sudden movement.

When he first heard you, he'd been laying on the couch scrolling on his phone, bored because Q had chosen to spend the night at Florian's, having the place to himself for tonight.

He swore he felt his heart drop when he heard you panicking tone on the other side and didn't even care if it was the first time he'd seen in two weeks of nothing, he pulled you in and when he heard you almost yell, he just placed his palm to shut you up as he heard the footsteps pass by.

He didn't mean to scare you but at the moment, all he could really think about was who even or what even happened to you.

"Who did this to you?" His tone seemed aggressive as he questioned in a deeper voice than usual. Well usual was also deep but it was something you got used to.

You'd become frozen the moment he spoke, not knowing what to say, a little embarrassed at how you ended up in this situation. He stepped forward, straightening up instinctively in alarm.

His eyebrows furrowed in question as he pushed his tongue to the side, lowering his head to your level, now near eye level with you, your eyes following his every movement.

You tried not to flinch too harshly when he grazed his fingertips on your cheek and lip, where you'd gotten hurt as well as the place near you eye and eyebrow.

"Uh, so like you see, it looks worse than what actually happened so really it isn't too big of a deal—"

Stepping back a bit, he looked at you ridiculously

"Not too big of a deal ?!" He questioned as if daring you to say it again,

"You must be kidding me right now." He laughed humorlessly as he ran his hand through his hair and you tried not to stare like an idiot.

And as cliche as it could be getting, you felt light headed as you tried to keep your balance. Blinking harshly to keep your eyes open, you almost fell forward when you took a step but this time Minho was able to catch you in time.

"Hey, hey, don't faint on me right now okay? Let's just get you seated first."

You leaned your weight on him as he held you with one arm, he'd move beside you to make you comfortable as he slowly walked you to the couch. Before he laid you down, he removed your bag from your shoulders and put it aside, to make sure you'd be able to lay more properly.

You sighed in both relief and exhaustion when you finally sat down.

"Wait I'll be back."

He recalled the first aid kit he had in his drawer and went to get it as soon as he could.

You shut your eyes, tiredness overwhelming you, not only from the adrenaline high getting over but also from the mental exhaustion that'd you'd been having since the whole mess.

You opened your eyes when you felt a weight beside you, Minho sitting down with a first aid kit in his hand.

He opened it to remove a bottle of hydrogen peroxide that made you scrunch your nose a little in disgust at the color and some cotton pads, band-aids, and a roll of bandage.

You noticed they were hello kitty ones, the same ones you used and that thought made you smile even for a brief moment.

"You really got this ones too?" You asked softly and Minho turned to look at you, looking at the band aids in awe and snorted at your expression.

"You are here, almost on the verge of passing out but you are questioning whether I have the same hello kitty band aids you have? And to answer your question, yes."

"Gotta keep those priorities in check."

He rolled his eyes as he soaked the cotton pad with the hydrogen peroxide, the familiar deep brown color showing.

He gently took your hand and began to clean the wound.

Hissing loudly, you sat more straight about to pull away but he still kept the grip on your arm.

"It's okay, it'll hurt a bit, just hold on for a sec." Minho gently said to you as he focused on cleaning it, laying your hand on your lap and taking another cotton pad when the current one got used enough.

As much as you wanted to cuss out loud, you decided to put your focus elsewhere, choosing his face was the perfect place for that.

His eyes were as soft as his touch, you didn't think he'd be this gentle with you but here you were, him tending to your wounds, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration as his jaw was unknowingly clenched in the same focus.

"Sorry." You blurted out of nowhere, the guilt from everything piling up one by one, from the fact that you'd been ignoring him for two weeks only to show up after and him having to tend to your injuries when he could have just kicked you out.

He briefly made eye contact with you, wiping the now cleaner cuts with a dry cotton pad, and opening the kit again to remove a tube of antibiotic ointment.

The coolness of the ointment made you almost breath out of relief but you were still tense because Minho hadn't said anything yet.

"I get that you must be…angry with me. It's reasonable but I have my own reasons, I think they are pretty valid if you want to hear them out?"

You finished, your throat closing up afterwards and you felt like you'd pass out from how fast your heart began beating.

"How did you get injured like this? First, tell me that." He finally spoke, wrapping a sterile white bandage around your fingers after the ointment.

He carefully finished wrapping and tied a knot, making sure it wasn't too tight as he looked at you questionably, to which you shook your head.

"It's stupid. Really."

"I know you're stupid but—"

"I fell." You let the cat out of the bag and diverted your gaze, his movements pausing to process your words as if he heard wrong.

"Don't lie to me. Did someone bully you and beat you up—"

"I was coming to the dorms from my "study" session at the cafe that's like twenty minutes away from here, when I went to the grocery store for…stuff. And after I got what I needed, I was heading here and I was uh…preoccupied with something that I didn't see what was infront of me, so I stepped on it and then I tripped on my own feet and next thing I know my face was kissing the ground, then when—"

"You're telling me this was all because of your clu—"

"LET ME FINISH!"

Minho shut up after that and pressed his lips into a thin line while you continued,

"As I was saying, I couldn't see what it was and it already hid in the dark when I flashed my phone's light, I saw it was a cat and then I felt bad for stepping on its tail, I went back and got some tuna for it at the store, I gave it to her but I think she was still upset so when I went to pet her, she scratched my fingers, which is why my hand is also injured."

"And oh, I ended up here by accident because I entered your dorm building while I was making a run for it and realized it too late, I didn't want to get caught so I thought of just asking whether I could hide in your dorm until the advisors stopped their rounds."

You breathed out heavily, your chest hurting from the lack of oxygen for saying all that in one go but you didn't want to embarrass yourself by thinking too much about it and just wanted to let it all out in go.

You moved your gaze back to Minho's when you noticed how quiet he'd gotten afterwards, having been looking somewhere else when telling how you got in this situation.

Narrowing your eyes at him suspiciously, he averted his gaze elsewhere while you scanned his expression.

"You can laugh if you want to." Sighing you finally said and that seemed to work as Minho laughed at you.

You deadpanned him as he spoke in between his laughing "You are really the biggest klutz I have known, I mean all this all because of a cat?!"

Rolling your eyes, you lightly frowned and Minho noticing this, began calming down,

"Okay, Okay I won't laugh, I'm sorry." He breathed out as he cleared his throat and looked at you, biting his bottom lip to stop the giggles as he saw your expressions.

"Are we done here? I have to go back to my room too—"

"I haven't even treated your face yet!"

Now it was your turn to shut up and you slightly pouted at his scolding tone,

"As hilarious as your little story is…you need to be more careful. Like this is kinda crazy to get hurt like this by just falling."

"Okay, mum got it." You mocked him and he glared at you, pressing the soaked cotton pad onto your cheek out of nowhere.

"YOU BITCH! WARN SOMEONE NEXT TIME—"

"You should have already known—"

"You KNOW WHAT FUCK YO—"

He ignored you as he continued to clean up your wound, your words being replaced with quite literally having to bite your tongue to control the hisses of pain.

"Now, now please shut up and stay still."

You wanted to cuss at him again, claiming this was abuse but the look on his face challenged you to dare to pipe up again.

Instead, you just sighed in exhaustion, letting him finish his unnecessary kind act that was again questionable if it were out of his supposed kindness or convenience.

"Now there, all done." He placed the final hello kitty band-aid on your lip corner gently and you wished you could smile but that felt like a terrible idea as you remembered that even lifting up the corner of your right side made a sharp pain shoot up your lip.

"Thank you…I guess." You murmured softly to which a smug smile formed on his face,

"I didn't hear you, could you please repeat that for me?" He pretended to be in thought of what you said when he clearly heard you due to your proximity.

You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms and swallowing down the bitter taste on your tongue, having to put your ego down a little at this point.

"I said."

"Thank you for this. Thank you for…helping me. Even when you didn't need to."

Even if you couldn't see it because you'd been looking elsewhere but him, he had a tiny smile on his face as he watched you.

"Anytime clumsy idiot, if it weren't me to handle your clumsy ass, then who?"

It was probably meant as a joke, maybe a taunt even but your heart took it in a different way as you felt the familiar butterflies flutter.

"Minho seriously stop it, you shouldn't just say things like that."

He'd begun winding up the first aid kit and the extra stuff that was there, when he heard you say that under your breath, which made him stop his task.

"Things like what?" He faced you now, his body in your direction as you froze up.

"Oh you know what I mean…stuff that can be taken into….a different context by…people." You awkwardly said, trying to dodge your way out of what you actually meant.

"Do enlightenment me, you know about the context of this." He leaned in closer to you, a smirk forming on his face and you frowned, gulping thinking of what to say next.

"Uhm…well." Biting your lip in thought, the floor seemed like a better place to focus at.

Minho's eyes softened at that, deciding he'd rather not tease you more.

"You know, I still don't get why you have been ignoring me for two weeks. Actually, everyone for two weeks." He blurted out what he really wanted to ask since he'd been able to talk to you properly after this long.

"At first, I thought that maybe you were busy but after the first 4-5 days, I figured you'd been purposefully avoiding me." He said as he looked down and you could feel the guilt creeping up all over again.

"Look. What is something I did?" He asked you with a tone of regret looking at you to see if your expression would reveal anything and as you held eye contact, what made you snap was the sincerity in them.

"No! No, it's not you…well, it is about you but not because of you? It's me though! I am the problem here." Staring at him got too much so you just decided to stand up and avoid looking at him when you spoke. The proximity was also getting to your head and the musky yet expensive smell he wore was suddenly so strong it made you dizzy.

You began racing back and forth in that small space, as you thought of how to explain and you didn't even grasp you'd been rambling the whole time, your hands moving in gestures as actions to your words.

"I sort of just noticed something about me and it got a lot since I never really felt like that way and it's crazy because it is also unexpected—"

Minho stood up and stood in front of you, holding you by your shoulders, genuine concern on his face when he scanned your distressed look.

"Okay calm down, if you don't feel comfortable explaining anything right now, you can just rest and you can tell when you do feel like it."

"No."

He raised an eyebrow at your answer and you continued,

"I think… I want to say it."

He dropped his hands from your shoulders, letting them rest by his sides as you looked into his eyes.

For that moment, you just now perceived how close you were to him, taking in how handsome he truly was, you never admitted it but it was very obvious.

Your eyes momentarily paused on his lips, maybe looking at them for longer than one should and before you could trail your gaze lower to the dip of his throat in his hoodie, you paused at his Adam's apple that bobbed up and down as he swallowed.

Even though he'd been the one who got close to you like this, Minho still felt a little nervous when you looked up at him like the way you were right now.

"Turn around." You ordered before you could even think about it and confusion flooded his face.

"I won't be able to say it while looking at you so please."

Pausing for a brief second, he turned on his heel now facing the greenish bluish wall.

"You know if you want to confess to a murder, you don't need to be afraid, I'll help you hide—"

"I think I'm in love with you." You exclaimed, ignoring his words as you stared at the back of his head.

He was not that taller than you, just by a few inches or so but it was just the right height.

Immediately, you noticed him shut up and tense up as his shoulders straightened.

"I personally never thought it'd be you out of all people but fuck, it's not like your heart lets you decide who you should fall in love with." You tugged at the uninjured hand's sleeve while you used your other to brush your hair behind your ear.

"As cheesy as that sounds. I don't know when it happened or how it happened but I do know when I knew. It was when you bought food for me when I was upset and it was everything I liked. Or maybe it was when despite being cold yourself, you'd offered me your sweater and gosh you just know how to pull at one's strings don't you?"

"I'll admit though, I was annoyed by you and your…attitude and I still will be but it's just that, crazily enough I think that's just one of the reasons I fell for you."

"You're many things Minho, stupid, annoying as fuck, bitchy at times as well, but you're also sweet and caring when you want to be. And now I am just rambling at this point so I'll just shut up."

You pressed your lips into a thin line, the ground a great place to put your attention, your cheeks warming up and you swore you felt like you'd faint then and there.

It was like the atmosphere took a change after your confession and momentary rant. A lingering silence that felt loud and you really didn't know what to think.

Can I die at this moment right now? Dropping dead sounds so tempting.

"..."

"...can I uh…turn around now? To you know…talk?" He asked, scratching the back of his neck nervously your eyes snapped to him, widening when you recalled that he was still facing the wall.

Groaning at the fact that you forgot he was not facing you, you coughed out awkwardly,

"Yeah! Of course…you can."

You held your breath as you waited for him to turn around, and when he did, you couldn’t even look at him.

Minho honestly didn’t know what to think, say or do.

Because what can you say after the person you’ve been pining over since the past few months suddenly confessed their apparently reciprocated love to you?

He thought he’d been doing a decent job hiding his feelings so he doesn’t need to face the brutal rejection fear we all get when we have a crush on our supposed ‘enemy’. But it got harder for him as time went by, and soon enough he found himself completely head over heels for you.

Taking his obvious silence as your answer, your heart grew heavier at the lack of response and you spoke up, breaking the blanket of quietness.

“I suppose you don’t feel the same way so I should probably just go anyways it’s getting late, just…forget I said anything-”

You began to slowly take a few steps back, making sure you wouldn’t fall and injure yourself again,

Minho’s head sharply turned towards you as his eyes widened in alarm, “Wait! You didn’t even let me say anything!”

Pausing in your steps before you could swiftly turn for the door and exit as quick as you could, now a sheepish look on your face as you saw his slightly annoyed and alarmed look.

“Well, I just assumed your silence was an answer?”

He crossed his arms now a few feet away from you as he was already making his way towards you.

“There you go again with you and your assumptions! You really should let someone speak at least.” He sighed rubbing the gap between his brows with his index finger.

He moved closer to you, now only an arm's length away from you, “Look at me, please?”

You had to raise your head a little to look him in the eyes and you felt like you could get lost in them, one hand was on your side, clenched in a fist out of nervousness.

“Who said I didn’t feel the same?” He asked so casually as if asking for your name and you could only gape at him at the implications.

“Because I definitely know that,” He gulped as he looked down at you, feeling like his heart might just jump out of his chest at what he was about to say.

“I am in love with you, maybe a little or by a whole lot. A whole lot I swear I can feel my heart jump just at your presence. I didn’t say anything because honestly, I thought this was another dream I was having, I had to pinch myself to make sure. But I do feel the same, possibly more than you ever will.”

Your jaw might as well have been on the floor at his unexpected confession, frankly, yours was also something you didn’t think you were going to say, but you said it because you couldn’t keep it in you anymore.

“Hold on, what do you mean by another dream?” You narrowed your eyes at him suspiciously, deciding to mess around with him but in reality, you were soaring and your heart probably long leaped out of you in pure euphoria.

“Out of all that, you picked up on only that?!? Did you just- just completely dismiss the fact that I am in love with you as well?!”

Giggling at his expression, you couldn’t contain your happiness as he fell for your joke and once he realised that he glared at you half-heartedly,

“You think you’re so funny huh? Do you even know how hard it was for me to say that? I almost fainted for fucks sake!”

You laughed even more at that, having to hold your stomach with one hand as you leaned forward and at the sound of your laughter, his own smile he’d been trying to control showed as he rolled his eyes at you, shaking his head.

“You seriously know how to make a guy have a heart attack.”

At this, you looked up at him stepping even closer as you bopped his nose,

“But you literally just confessed to being in love with me and you can’t take back what you said now.”

A comical squeak arose from you as he wrapped his arms around your waist out of nowhere pulling you closer, gently moving your injured hand on his shoulder to make sure you didn’t get hurt and you moved your other one around his neck.

It wasn’t like he’d never touched you, but still, the spark of electricity shooting through your entire body didn’t change one bit and it felt the same for him as the warmth radiating from you seemed to engulf him as well.

Staring at him, your eyes trailed to his lips and you moved closer, wanting to just,

Before you could even close the distance, you felt a finger on your lips and heard him whisper to you,

“No, no, you can’t kiss me right now, as much as I want to, you first need to let this heal.” He tenderly poked the right corner of your lip where you’d forgotten you were hurt at the moment.

Pouting slightly at that, Minho chuckled and before you could whine, he swiftly leaned forward and pecked your lips, lingering for a second before pulling back,

“That’s all you get, for now.” Sighing you just nodded, knowing it was for the best.

“You know you still have to make up to me for ignoring me for two weeks, I mean not only me but I’m sure Kitty’s ready to kick your ass as well, I heard she was planning to threaten to burn your giraffe socks if you didn’t talk to her.”

Suddenly a realisation hit you when you remembered something,

“IS THAT WHY I CAN’T FIND THEM SINCE THE PAST TWO DAYS?!?”

“...I suppose she’s already executed her plan.”

all written works as well as images and edits (unless credited) belong to pri. do not plagiarise, repost, re-edit or claim as yours. pics mostly found on pinterest.

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oh-koenig-my-koenig · 10 months

Text

(to the tune of Avril Lavigne's sk8terboi)

He was a human battering ram.

She was a recon sniper.

Can I make it any more obvious?

Headcannons - Fit for a King - König x fem!OC fanfic

Instead of making a y/n fic, I decided to create an original female character because I ususally write all of my stuff in POVs. Due to posting the chapters often right after I've written them some of the context and the characterization might not be explicit in every single piece, some of the information is only gonna get revealed down the road.

(TW: alcoholism, death, violence)

Karina Müller is almost 30 years old, she served in the Norwegian military from right after school until the death of her brother who was KIA on a mission together. She fell off the wagon after that, feeling responsible for his death and effectively being shunned by her family after that. Her pick of poison was alcohol and it got so bad that she more than once was drunk on the job which led to her getting kicked out.

The years after that she spent getting help, trying to get clean and going back to a civilian life, but the military was what she knew, so the civilian jobs didn't stick and she started to work as a mercenary, now a dry alcoholic. Which might be an issue for some contractors, but KorTac doesn't really bat an eye.

She's a compassionate person who loves to laugh, she's seen enough shit not to take any from her teammates and can stand her ground when faced with any challenge thrown her way. She's still working through some stuff, coming to terms with her past, but she has an optimistic spirit and a strong will.

Even though the Colonel seems scary at first, she learns pretty quickly that he is to be respected in training and on the battlefield, but on a personal level he's really not that bad. The 6'10'' killing machine, Austrian war criminal (insert "what murdeeer?!"-meme here) is quite an anxious person when it comes to basic human interaction.

Shouting orders at his team, stomping his enemies into the ground is more comfortable to him than just talking about mundane stuff with other people, he mostly keeps to himself (except for Horangi because that little shit would never leave him alone). And for the first time in a long time, Müller makes him wish that he could just go up to people and strike up a normal conversation like a normal person (don't we all).

König is 38 years old (we don't know his full name) and has the biggest metalhead dad vibes without actually having any children himself (his favourite band is Death, although he listens to a bunch of different ones, it's also their merch shirt Müller steals in "Are you wearing my t-shirt?").

When he started out in the military, he shaved his long metalhead hair off because that was the way to go back then, but he let it grow back when he was older and already Colonel. He has gauged ears and a plethora of tattoos all over his body because the soft pain of body modifications and working out until he almost passes out are his ways of dealing with his anxiety and stress. His body is a testament to that.

He has a huge scar on the right side of his face from when he got beaten to a pulp by his bullies at school, something he never let happen again after that (five on one was really unfair). His nose has been broken two times and sometimes his tattoos get destroyed by battle injuries, but he doesn't really care about that - or his looks in general. He's a soldier and not a model.

So the reason why he's always wearing the selfmade hood is not the scar. He prefers not to show his feelings to others, staying hidden underneath the mask for his own comfort, even if it makes him scarier also in situations where he doesn't want to be.

(CW: some nsfw headcannons ahead, talk about not wanting to have children) They're both switches, though König is leaning more on the Dom-side while Müller is a sub who likes to brat a little too much, just to see her man falter (for example when she calls him a good boy in random scene #1).

Müller is bisexual, something she discovered when serving in an all-women-taskforce of the Norwegian military (we don't really know about König's sexuality though). She decided a long time ago that she doesn't want to have children (she doesn't see herself leaving service again anytime soon and given her past, she doesn't see herself fit to become a mother), so she got her tubes tied. Which also comes in handy when a certain Colonel's favourite pasttime (well, actually second favourite) is leaving creampies inside her (no 'unexpected pregnancy' trope in this household).

König definitely eats pussy for his own pleasure, begging Müller to let him eat her out in "Sit" or losing a little friendly competition for a sexual favour in "But no funny business" (oh and he definitely steals her panties at any chance he gets). She's totally not opposed to servicing him as well, but the size of his dick makes this a whole endeavour (like seen in "Open wide, Prinzessin").

They match each other's energy pretty well, just going at it like rabbits at every chance they get, which sometimes proves to be difficult as they're sneaking around in secret.

Their arrangement is kind of a fuckbuddy/fwb-situation, they fuck hard and rough, without ever really kissing (the mask stays on), but after a while feelings start to get in the way... After all they do belong together <3

Read more at the Fit for a King - Masterlist or keep an eye out for the AO3 link - coming soon.

#könig #könig cod #könig mw2 #konig #konig cod #konig mw2 #könig x fmc #könig fanfiction #cod mw2 smut #könig smut #konig smut #cod smut #female oc

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xxxdreamscapexxx · 1 year

Text

Consequences

Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader

Word count: 15.1k

Summary: Wanda is excited to get to meet your parents for the first time and she wants to make the best impression, but you won’t make it easy for her, teasing her the entire time and she finds the perfect way to punish you.

Warning: NSFW, 18+, lesbian relationship, oral, oral to a strap, spanking, fingering, magic use, magical restraints, finger sucking, strap on sex, enchanted strap, use of butt plug, Mommy!Kink, top!Wanda, Bottom!Reader OMG, I’m so excited about this fic! Masterlist with all my works. Part 2: Face the consequences

Late on a Friday night, you watched your girlfriend pace around your shared bedroom. This was the third time she was going over the list she had made, reading out loud each item and checking if everything was packed and ready for your trip. You both knew it was, but Wanda wanted to make sure. She was nervous about meeting your parents and she was compensating in any way she could. You had told your parents about Wanda fairly soon into your relationship. You came out to them after college and even though they had different expectations back then, they were supportive. Sensitive of their feelings, you were reluctant to talk about your partners, but when you met Wanda, you couldn’t stop talking about her. Which is why 6 months into the relationship, they insisted they meet her. She was happy, of course, to know that you felt so strongly about her, that you were proud to be her girlfriend, that you showed her off to your friends as much as she did with you. It was new to her. It was usually her, who would show off her girl any chance she got, her who would tell people over and over how great they were. But you had done the same from the very beginning and it made her love you even more. Now, when she was about to meet your parents soon, she wanted to live up to the high standard you had set with the amazing things you said about her and you couldn’t watch her torture herself anymore. You walked over to her, wrapping your arms around her softly in an attempt to calm her nerves. “We have everything, Wanda, you know we do.” You said softly, watching her turn around in your hands, so she could face you. “Just come to bed?” You offered, taking her hand in hers and tugging on it gently. Wanda managed a genuine smile, making you hopeful and you sat on the edge of the bed, pulling her between your open thighs. “Wouldn’t you prefer to play with me instead?” You teased, hoping to entice her. “Oh, my poor girl.” She cooed, smoothing your hair gently. “I haven’t touched you all day and you’re feeling all needy, aren’t you?” She smirked, leaning down to kiss you softly. “Does your pretty pussy need Mommy?” She asks, voice sweet and full of promises. “Yes, Mommy, I need you.” You breathe out, your eyes closing on their own just at the thought of being touched, of getting to let go and relax. “My sweet girl.” She smiled, holding your chin up with her fingers and leaning down to kiss you. You almost held your breath, waiting for the moment her lips would touch yours, but that moment never came. Instead, you heard her exclaim “Pyjamas!”, pulling away from you before you could even protest and she started to look through the closet. You could only groan, frustration evident on your face as you watched her. You knew that when she got like this, there was nothing that would truly distract her, which was a shame, because you genuinely hoped that she would join you in bed and touch you, the way you’d been dreaming of all day. “Get into bed, honey.” She said, pausing to look over at you with affection. “I’ll join you soon.” She promised, before she resumed her previous actions. “Promise?” “Yes, dear, I promise.” She sighed, coming over to kiss you briefly, tucking you in and smiling as you closed your eyes. You followed her movements throughout the house for a few minutes, your ears attuned to her and her habits, feeling sleepy and tired, until eventually you drifted off. You felt her settle into bed next to you at some point, turning over so you could cuddle her, her head pressing to your chest, so she could let the steady rhythm of your heartbeat calm her and you wrapped your arms around her securely, kissing her forehead affectionately, but you were too tired and sleepy to ask what time it was. You were afraid that she had spent too much time worrying, but she was with you now and that’s all you wanted. You knew why she was concerned. You talked about it in length, when your parents first invited the two of you. You knew this was the first time she was ever meeting one of her partners’ parents, that she was scared that if they dislike her, it would change your relationship, that they would think she’s not good enough for you. And you knew they were all valid things to be worried about, normal, mundane things… Things that would pale to the reaction your parents would have if they ever found out that your girlfriend is a witch… And you tried your best to reassure her, to support her and answer all her questions about your family, in hopes to help her feel more at ease. You also knew that when she got like this, she didn’t sleep much. That she’ll wake up way too early and worry herself into a frenzy, waking you up and rushing you through the door, so you could get there as quickly as possible, because God forbid that your parents think that you might sleep in a little on a Saturday. Just as you had predicted, when the alarm on your nightstand got off, Wanda was already up, two cups of steaming coffee were waiting for you and she was looking at the traffic reports and different routes she could take on her phone. She was buzzing with excitement, you could see it and you didn’t want to add to her frustration, so despite the early hour and the voice inside your head that told you that you wanted to cuddle her and drink your coffee in bed, you got up and got ready in record time, all the while trying to calm her nerves. “Are you sure this outfit is ok? I don’t want to come off as flashy.” She asked, playing with her rings. “It’s perfect, Wanda. And so are you.” You assured her, kissing her cheek gently. “You could benefit from a longer skirt.” She muttered, eyeing your choice. She loved you in this and had seen you in it before, but it was for a date. She thought that for your parents, perhaps something less revealing would be a better choice. “My parents don’t care about that, Wands. It’s ok.” You smiled, pulling her into a hug. “Please don’t let this get to you. You have faced so many things, you’re so strong, baby… You’re the Scarlet Witch! You’re an Avenger! Meeting my parents should be a piece of cake.” “Except I can’t fight your parents, if things don’t go well.” She frowned, taking a deep breath to steady herself and you couldn’t help but chuckle a little at her statement. “If all else fails, try that.” You joked. “Just know that my mom looks fragile, but she’s freakishly strong and she fights dirty.” And you smiled, when you saw Wanda chuckle a little at your statement. “I’ll keep it in mind.” She muttered, leaning down to kiss you. “I just hope we haven’t missed anything.” She commented. “I’m sure that if we did, you can just magic it for us.” You insisted, holding on to her. “You have a solution for everything, don’t you.” She teased, her eyes drifting to your lips. “Yup. I’m a problem-solver.” You teased her back, leaning in a little, daring her to kiss you. “And the solution is always you. You make everything better.” You added, the words true and soft. At that, she couldn’t help but kiss you, her palms cradling your face affectionately as she kissed you gently, but fully, claiming your mouth and causing a surge of excitement to pass through your body. She didn’t miss the way you shuddered against her needily, she knew you were feeling that way since last night and she smirked, making a mental note to take care of that as soon as the two of you got back. Not that she didn’t want to ravish you right this second, but you didn’t have time and she was not going to risk your parents’ good favour by fucking you senseless and making you scream right under their roof. “We should get going, sweetheart.” She whispered, when the two of you parted and her resolve almost broke when she heard you mewl for her. “I promise to take such good care of you as soon as we get back, baby girl. I’ll give you everything you want, kitten, no holding back. You just have to be a little more patient.” “When we get back?” You reflected, thinking of all the time you’ll have to spend without her touch. “No, no, no, please Wands, that’s too long! Please don’t make me wait that long.” “It’s just a couple of nights, honey. We can make it.” She insisted. She didn’t want to be deprived of your touch either, but she wasn’t going to let her desire for you ruin her chance to win your parents, so she strengthened her resolve. She knew she would need a lot of it, since she hadn’t needed to hold back since before your first night together. After that amazing time, when she finally made you her own, your relationship developed quickly and she took advantage of every opportunity to ravage you, making this stay with your parents the longest dry spell the two of you have had to face. With a deep sigh you let her pull away from you and she smiled a little at the dramatic way you were taking it all. Surely, it couldn’t be that bad. But she pushed the thought from her mind, taking most of your bags, allowing you to carry just some small, light things to the car and she loaded it all in. On the road she let you play whatever music you wanted, but the two of you mostly talked, the time passing quickly. Whenever she didn’t keep you occupied, she would see your eyes wander at the scenery around you and she would have thought you looked serene if it wasn’t for the subtle, but unmistakable way you would squeeze your legs together and she was tempted to see what you were thinking of, but since she was driving, she didn’t want to accidentally crash her car, due to the images she might find, settling for occupying your time and mind instead. When you arrived, car parked in your parents’ driveway, Wanda started to fidget. She turned to you, her green eyes full of worry and you took her hand in yours. You were going to start reassuring her, wanting to help her feel more at ease, but as soon as your mouth opened, so did your house’ front door and your parents stepped outside, smiling faces taking you both in. “I love you, Wanda.” You squeezed her hand in yours, as it was the best you could do in the short time you had, seeing your mom and dad starting to walk towards you. “It’s going to be ok.” You promised and she nodded, steeling her nerves and gathering all her composure, so she would look friendly and kind. The moment you stepped out of the car, meeting your parents in the middle of the driveway, they started to hug you, your mom reaching you first and hugging you warmly. Your dad, more reserved as he was, stayed at your mother’s side, smiling and following Wanda’s movements as she stepped closer to the 3 of you. You hugged him next, his arms wrapping around you entirely and pulling you close. Unlike your mom, he said nothing, as sharing his feelings wasn’t his way, but you knew it warmed his heart to have you back. “Mom, dad, I would like you both to meet my girlfriend Wanda.” You announced when she was finally next to you and you watched them greet each other, watching the interaction closely. Both your parents offered their hands to her, introducing themselves with a smile and they barely waited for the pleasantries to be over, before they beckoned you inside. You watched your dad help Wanda with the luggage, as neither one would allow you to help, and you saw the subtle smile on his face grow, liking her already. And it wasn’t because Wanda carried your bags. He knew you were a capable girl and that you didn’t need someone to do it for you. He just liked that Wanda was the type of woman who gave you a glance and said “We’ve got it” and you listened without protest. Something he'd never seen you do in your life. By the time the two of you settled it was already lunch and the two of you joined your parents around the neatly set table. Your mother had asked you in advance about what Wanda liked and if she was allergic to anything, preparing different menus for the days you’d spend together and she proudly started to bring out food from the kitchen, refusing any offers of help from you or Wanda. During the meal your parents got to know Wanda a little better, the conversation flowing smoothly and as her curiosity piqued, she started listening in on their thoughts. She knew it was wrong, but she couldn’t help it. She was scared that they’ll hate her. But as much as it shocked her, they didn’t. In fact they loved her. She spoke equally well with both of them. She spoke about cooking, fashion and art with your mom and politics, house maintenance, travel and gardening with your dad. Because truly, your parents’ beautiful garden was all his doing. Something Wanda was well aware of, of course. And the more she won them over, the more she enjoyed being here with them. Your mother saw the vulnerability in her, saw how gentle and caring she was towards you, saw the affection and adoration in her eyes every time she looked at you. Your mother could tell Wanda was good for you. You seemed happy, radiant even. She saw the pride in your eyes when you looked at your girlfriend, saw the love, saw your newfound spark for life there and she was overjoyed. She saw the way Wanda encouraged your interests and hobbies and she was glad that you had found someone like her as a partner. Your father liked Wanda too. He, the way men do, noticed the strength in her, saw the way she walked confidently, with her shoulders squared and her head high, saw she was considerate of you, protective of you, the way he had once hoped a man would. Knowing you loved women, he was accepting, and of all the women, he was happy that you had picked Wanda Maximoff. More than that, he could tell you respected her. The way you hadn’t showed respect towards any other partner you’ve had and, in his eyes, if Wanda was worthy of your respect, then she certainly was the right kind of woman for you. “They love you.” You told her, when you got a moment alone with her. “I swear they love you more than they love me.” “You know that’s not true, baby.” Wanda smiled, stroking your hair. “They just like me for you.” “Oh, I’m not saying that as a bad thing.” You laughed. “It’s good that they love you.’’ You said, leaning in to kiss her gently, but getting immediately pushed away, when Wanda heard your parents walking back in. Wanda was a modern, progressive woman by all accounts, she knew about all the new trends and she could blend in anywhere and talk freely with anyone, she rarely cared about what others might think of her and she was never ashamed to show the world you were hers. She kissed you passionately when she wanted to, held your hand in public proudly, kept you close, but when it came to this, she was old-fashioned to the core. She wasn’t going to kiss you in front of your mom and dad, she was not going to have sex with you in their house and she was not going to let you try to tempt her. Seeing the disappointment in your eyes, she squeezed your hand in a silent apology, hating that she had to pull away from your lips. Despite what you might have thought, she already missed your lips and couldn’t wait to claim them all over again. “Girls.” Your mom spoke with a cheerful tone. “We’ll have to leave you two for a bit. We have some errands to run, but we’ll be back before dinner.” She explained and you inwardly cheered at the prospect of being left alone with Wanda. “If you want, the two of you can go out.” She suggested, turning to Wanda. “It’s so nice outside right now and Y/N can show you the town.” She offered. “Oh, that would be lovely.” Wanda agreed, before you had a chance to utter a word. You were actually seconds away from saying you’d rest instead, but her eagerness was so charming that you couldn’t resist. “We should.” Wanda turned to you too. “I want to know where you grew up.” “That’s so wonderful.” Your mom exclaimed. “Wanda, dear, after dinner I’ll show you all my albums with pictures of Y/N, too.” She promised and you had to hold in your groan. “You don’t need to do that, mom.” You tried to protest. “Yeah, I’m sure she doesn’t want to see all that.” Your dad chimed in, coming to your rescue. “I would love to see them.” Wanda spoke, her voice soft and sweet. She wasn’t going to let you deprive her of this, no matter how embarrassed you were. “It’s settled then.” Your mom agreed, looping her hand through your father’s arm and pulling him out of the room. “Have fun, girls!” She spoke over her shoulder and you could practically hear the smile she was wearing. “Don’t give me that look, detka.” Wanda smiled mischievously. “You can’t tell me you didn’t expect that.” “Expected it? Yes. But I still hoped to avoid it.” You muttered. “No way, dear. That would be too good to miss.” “I can’t believe you’d do that to me.” You protested again, but you were already smiling. You couldn’t deny Wanda anything. In the background you could hear your parents closing their front door, leaving you alone and an idea sparkled in your head. “I know… The torture!” She smiled, fake pity lacing in her voice. “Yeah… But you can make it up to me.” You offered, your voice dropping. You stood up from your chair and straddled her, your arms circling her neck, while you allowed your skirt to ride up your thighs, so Wanda could see the pair of pretty pink panties you had on. “And how would I do that?” She asked, lust slowly taking over her brain and you knew you almost had her. You leaned in to kiss her, eyes fluttering shut as your hips instinctively dragged themselves over her lap, searching for friction against your needy pussy, when suddenly you stiffened, startled by the sound of the front door flinging open again and your mother’s distant voice explaining to your dad that she’ll just grab whatever it is she forgot and they’ll be on their way and his grumbling response, before they left again. The two of you laughed, as if you were teenagers, seconds away from being caught doing something forbidden and with reluctance, you got yourself up, the moment ruined. “I’m sorry, darling.” Wanda soothed, helping you get off her lap and the two of you headed to the door. Wanda had a love for small towns that you couldn’t quite understand, but you showed her the place where you used to play as a kid, your old school, the café you loved going to with your friends and she listened to you with so much genuine interest as you told her about your memories that you felt blessed to have her as your partner. She insisted to see where you had your first kiss and the spot you liked for picnics, immersing herself in your life. You knew her life was much different than yours, that she never had those things, that she had faced a hard life and at first you were reluctant you talk about your experiences, about what you knew to be privilege, but she soon assured you that it didn’t hurt her to hear those things. She wanted to know everything about you. She wasn’t resentful that you had an easier life, she was happy that she was building a normal, good one alongside you. The two of you ended up on a bench in the park, talking about what you wanted in life, what your hopes and dreams for the future looked like and you both felt a sense of belonging with the other. You had talked about these things before, of course, shared ideas and aspirations, but now it felt more intimate and the two of you relaxed against each other, only leaving when it started to get dark. When you walked back into your parents’ house, they were already talking animatedly in the living room, greeting you both with wide smiles. “Did you have a nice walk?” Your mother asked, seating you on the couch. “What do you think of our little town Wanda?” “It’s lovely.” Your girlfriend smiled, taking her seat. You sat next to her, her hand on your thigh, smiling as the conversation around you started to flow effortlessly. Your parents directed most of the conversation on Wanda, naturally curious about her and somehow your thoughts managed to drift away on their own, until your name being called snapped you to attention. “What?” You blinked away your thoughts, focusing on your mother’s expecting gaze. “Sorry, I got distracted for a moment.” And distracted you were. She had put her hand on your thigh mindlessly, not really meaning anything more than that, but it had awoken something inside you. You remembered all the other times Wanda would touch you this way. On car rides and movie nights, in the dark movie theatre… All the times she teased you this way, made you needy, made you desperate for her touch. And desperate you were. You were going a little crazy at how badly you needed her and you couldn’t help but squeeze your legs together as you tried to shake away the thought. “That’s all right, dear.” Your mother laughed. “I just asked if you could help me in the kitchen.” “Yes.” You managed a smile, getting up from your spot, feeling wetness smear across your underwear. This couldn’t do. You needed some sort of relief, or you were going to explode. “Would you excuse me for just a moment and I’ll join you in the kitchen?” You asked discretely. “Of course.” Your mom smiled, heading towards the kitchen, while you went upstairs and locked yourself in the bathroom. You leaned against the door, sighing, your mind split between wanting relief and thinking that you shouldn’t be doing this right now. Just a little patience. That’s what Wanda had said when you left your house this morning. But your body said something different. Just the thought of being kissed by her, of being touched and fucked by her was making your pussy throb and protest against the emptiness you felt. You needed to cum or you were going to go crazy. Your mind settling on a decision, you let your hand sneak under your skirt and inside your underwear, finding copious amounts of wetness there. Not really having much time to tease yourself, you used one hand to circle your clit, while the fingers of the other found your entrance and you pushed inside, pulling a deep sigh from you. It didn’t feel as good as Wanda’s touch, it didn’t even come close, but then again nothing felt as good as her anymore, but it was something and you started to work yourself up. Your mind filled with images of Wanda, of what she’ll do to you, of the little fantasies you’ve had with her that you felt too shy to share, loosing yourself in the moment entirely, until a knock on the door startled you back into reality. “Y/N, honey, are you all right?” Your mother’s voice called out and your heartbeat quickened. “Yeah, I’m ok. I’ll be right out.” You responded, your voice less stable than you hoped. “Ok, dear, I’ll be in the kitchen.” She explained and you heard her footsteps as she descended the stairs again. As soon as she left, you let out a shaky breath, feeling even more wound up. You were close. You needed a couple more minutes and you were going to cum and the thought of that frustrated you more. You needed this and you were so close, so with a shaky hand, you reached beneath your skirt once more, determined to get this done as quickly as possible. You got close, your breathing ragged as you tried to keep yourself as quiet as possible. The edge came next, not as good as you hoped for, but something and you needed a few more seconds to finally come, when another knock on the door startled you. This time you were listening closely, yet you heard no sound and that brought an icy feeling in your veins that the only person who could sneak this well is Wanda. “Darling, can you open the door for me?” She asked calmly, but you could hear the edge in her voice. “I’m just washing my hands and coming out, Wands.” You called out, wanting to buy yourself some time to calm down. Your answer however did not seem to satisfy her and you heard the click of the lock, no doubt using her magic and the door opened slowly, your girlfriend walking in. You had made yourself presentable as much as you could, but you knew she could read you like a book, no doubt guessing what you were doing. And it wasn’t hard. Your hands shook, the look in your eyes one of guilt and desperation. “Honey, what were you doing?” She asked softly, stalking towards you like a predator. “Nothing, I just needed a moment.” You tried to say, but had no real excuse. “Don’t lie to me.” Wanda captured you in her arms, pulling you close to her. Her voice was like a growl, her eyes stormy as she stared at you. “You have such loud thoughts, little kitten.” She said, the danger in her voice unmistakable. “Did you think I wouldn’t find out?” “No, I…” You tried to say, not really sure where this sentence was going to go anyway. “I could hear you all the way downstairs, baby. You have such pretty thoughts in your head when you think of me. So naughty.” She cut you off, trapping you between her body and the cold tiles. Wanda took your hands in hers gently, lovingly, pulling them up and bringing her face close to your fingers. “I can smell your sweet pussy on your fingers.” She said darkly. “Are you going to deny that as well?” “Wanda, I was just…” You tried to explain, knowing there was nothing you could say. “Don’t you dare…” She growled in your face, coming even closer, if that was even possible, every inch of your body pressed against hers. “Mommy will punish you for that when we get home.” She said through her teeth. “I hope that edge was worth it.” With those words she let you go, walking away from you before you could protest. “Don’t take too long.” She called out over her shoulder, before she left you alone in the bathroom. You sighed, feeling more worked up than before, knowing she won’t let you finish, now that she’d caught you and already making your mom wait in the kitchen. Truly, this was a disaster, but you pulled yourself together. You took off your ruined panties, knowing they would be more uncomfortable and you put them in the basket with the rest of the dirty laundry. You tried to dry off as much as you could, then washed your hands and walked downstairs. Helping your mother in the kitchen was a good distraction, keeping you busy and your mind away from inappropriate thoughts of Wanda. It mostly worked, or at least you didn’t feel that terrible need between your legs every second while you loaded the dishwasher, or set the table. It was working until Wanda walked in, wanting to ask if the two of you needed any help. Her presence instantly brought to mind the earlier events and with them, the terrible need between your legs, making you squeeze them together in desperation. Truly, it wasn’t fair that she could turn you into a mess with nothing but her presence, but knowing there was nothing you could do about it currently, you tried your best to ignore it, hoping the woman would leave. Unfortunately, your mother left first, leaving you alone with Wanda and an idea instantly popped into your head. You knew you shouldn’t do it. You knew that an angry Wanda was a force to be reconned with and you were already on thin ice with her from earlier, but you couldn’t help yourself. You wanted her so badly. You needed her. And if she was going to make you wait, then you were going to make it hard for her too. If she was going to punish you, and she was, there was no doubt in your mind about that, then you would enjoy earning it. “What can I do?” She asked, stepping closer. “Oh, no, I’m almost done.” You said with a smile. “I just need to grab something.” You explained, leaning over the counter. Your movements were exaggerated, you knew that. You were practically bent over the counter, allowing your skirt to ride up your thighs and move even higher, revealing you wore nothing underneath. You didn’t dare look back at Wanda, but you could feel her eyes on you, drinking you in and you loved it. You knew she absolutely adored having you this way, recalling countless times she’s bent you over, so she could fill you up with her cock. Whenever you had your ass in the air, she would go a little feral, she’d fuck you a little harder and God, did you need that kind of treatment right now. When Wanda saw you, her hands balled into fists and despite her enviable self-control, she started to walk towards you. Knowing that you don’t have the time you needed for the game you started, you straightened just in time to hear your mom walking in as well. Both women stared at you, your mom with her unsuspecting kindness coming to help and your girlfriend, with her jaw clenched at your little display and you gave them a smile as you headed to the dining room, Wanda close behind you and burning holes through your clothes. To her credit, your girlfriend managed to look calm and composed and she plastered a kind smile on her face and she sat down next to you on one side of the table with your parents on the other. You engaged in a conversation quickly, your transgression seemingly forgiven by Wanda, and perhaps you should have left it that way, knowing that the woman had very little tolerance for bratty behaviour, but there was a twisted part of you that loved pulling that out of her. You loved riling her up, not caring for the punishment you’ll receive. And you knew you’ll get exactly what you deserve. But that excited you too. You loved that Wanda could be so tender, so caring, so sweet, that she would make love to you as if you’re made of glass and pamper you like a princess and you loved when she got rough too, when she held you down and left marks and fucked you senseless, overstimulating you and using you to get off, leaving you a total mess, just so she would take care of you after, even softer and more loving than before. Both equally tempting in your mind. With these thoughts still lingering, you sneaked one of your hands under the table and straight on Wanda’s thigh, your face betraying nothing of what you were doing. You felt her stiffen under you, but to her credit, she remained calm and composed and you took that as a challenge, your fingers drawing circles, until she tried to jerk her leg away from you. Wanda tried to give you a warning glare, her actions subtle, but you ignored her. You were having way more fun than you expected, so your hand soon found her leg again, this time sliding further up, until she was forced to squeeze her legs together, so she could prevent you from cupping her pussy, as you seemingly intended. “Trying to get yourself in more trouble, huh?” You heard Wanda’s voice in your head. She sounded on edge, clearly affected, if she resorted to using her telepathic abilities and you only allowed yourself to smile mildly, while you pretended to listen to your parents. Ignoring her warning you kept going, your hand gliding down the length of her legs, before moving back up, fingers dancing on the insides of her thighs. You getting to rile Wanda up for a change was even more fun than you thought it would be and you mentally committed to the action, even if you knew she’ll make you regret it soon enough. “This is your last warning, baby girl.” You heard her voice in your head again. This time lower, laced with a dangerous note of excitement at the prospect of getting to put you back in your place. “If you stop right now, I’ll even consider being lenient with you.” She promised, although you both knew it was unlikely. For a few moments you considered, but really, it was your father’s voice, pulling you from your thoughts, that made you take your hand and place it back on the table. “What do you say we watch a movie after dinner? I hear Wanda enjoys movies and there’s this new comedy that your mother and I have been meaning to watch.’’ He suggested, looking at the both of you. “That sounds great, dad.” You said with a smile. “It would be lovely.” Wanda agreed and she placed a hand on top of yours, lacing your fingers together as a silent thank you, her features softening. When the meal was finished you helped your mother clear the table and clean up in the kitchen, while your dad insisted Wanda help him set up the movie. You heard him offer her a glass of whiskey as he poured himself one and you couldn’t help but smile at how naturally he seemed to accept her and welcome her. It was his way with you and your friends ever since you were old enough to drink. He never discriminated and actually taught you to drink without grimacing, enjoying to share an occasional glass with you whenever you were home, knowing that you only drank with him. You knew however that Wanda would refuse and he accepted it with a nod of his head as she sat in the big arm chair that he referred to as “his chair” ever since your family owned it, placing his glass on the small table next to it and engaging Wanda in a light conversation as they waited for you and your mom to join them. He had intended to give the woman a speech, tell her that you were one of the most important people in his life and that he does not wish to see you hurt, but he seemed to refrain from it and curiously, Wanda tried to find in his thoughts why, only to understand that it was solely because he seemed to see how much she cared about you too. A bond they shared wordlessly, while they waited. Once all four of you settled, your mom taking a seat next to your dad on another chair, so they can free up the couch for the two of you, you started the movie. It was a light comedy that had all of you laughing and commenting on the foolish actions of the characters. At some point Wanda pulled the small blanket that was placed on the couch and covered you both, allowing you to snuggle closer into her, the way you both loved and feeling the gesture your mom made to your dad, both of them sharing a smile, without saying a thing. The moment seemed peaceful, until Wanda’s hand rested against your thigh, while her eyes remained trained on the TV. She didn’t seem to mean anything by it, but it was enough to spark arousal inside you and you tried to shift uncomfortably, which only brought her hand even closer to where you needed her most, her fingertips resting against bare, smooth flesh. Thoughtlessly, recklessly, you decided to do the same, your hand finding her thigh and starting mindless circles against it, earning you a stern look of disapproval. You gave her a pointed look at her own hand, feeling your pussy twitch involuntarily and she seemed to understand, pulling her hand away to appease you, but the game was already on. The movie was entirely forgotten and you had a single thing in mind. Sex. By the end of the movie, Wanda didn’t even need to read your thoughts to know what you were thinking of. She could hear those loud thoughts even without her magic. You were driving yourself crazy just thinking of her and you were making it impossible for her to concentrate on anything else as well. With a hard glare and her patience entirely gone, Wanda decided that she would not let you continue to behave like a brat the entire weekend and she quickly formed a plan on how to handle the situation. When the finishing credits rolled your parents excused themselves, bidding you goodnight and she knew she wouldn’t have to wait much longer. “You girls can stay and watch something else if you like.” Your mom offered. “But you know how we are, dear, we like to go to bed at a reasonable hour.” “We’ll probably go up soon, too, mom.” You smiled. “Well, goodnight then girls.” Your dad said with a tired smile, getting up from his chair and coming over to kiss the top of your head, before they both retired to their room. “What do you say Wands, wanna go to bed, or stay and watch another movie?” You asked suggestively, leaning in to kiss her cheek, but being stopped by Wanda’s firm hand on your throat. “Oh, we’re going upstairs.” She practically hissed, her eyes glowing red as they finally met yours. You tried to swallow, a task that proved difficult with a hand wrapped around your neck. “That’s what you want, isn’t it?” She asked, tilting her head to the side as she took you in. “Yes.” You nodded hopefully. You were practically melting just from this, eyes full of lust and arousal, mind and body surrendering entirely just from the small touch she offered, just from the prospect of being touched and although Wanda wanted to be mad at you for pulling all these stunts, she couldn’t help but feel a sort of warmth inside her, because she knew it was done, so you would get her attention, so you would get to feel her the way you did now. Because you wanted her. And she knew she shouldn’t reward such behaviour, that she should punish you. And letting you stew in your neediness would be a great way of doing that, but she couldn’t ignore that she herself felt so much desire for you. You had awakened a sleeping beast inside her and she wanted nothing more than to devour you whole and she knew the perfect way to do both. “And you think you can always get what you want from me?” She asked, her eyes narrowing dangerously. “You think that teasing me and acting up will get you what you want?” “No, I…” You try to speak, but you’re quickly cut off. “I don’t want to hear excuses from you.” She whispered dangerously. “Upstairs, now!” She practically ordered and you scurried to obey her. You walked to your room in silence, not wanting to alert your parents and Wanda walked behind you. You could feel her hard eyes on you with every step you took and you practically held your breath until you walked into your room, turning on the lights and hearing her close the door gently. You turned to face her, expecting to be met with more of her harsh words, but you saw only magic instead. She had her arms outstretched and the room glowed with her scarlet magic as it spread to every corner. When she was done, she stalked towards you, capturing you quickly and spinning your body, walking you backwords until your back hit the same door you just came in from. It gave a loud thud and you looked around, scared that the sound could probably be heard throughout the house. “Oh, don’t worry.” Wanda smiled almost cruelly. “I soundproofed this room. No one can hear what happens here.” Her grin widened as she raked her eyes over your body. “I can make you scream all night long and no one will know.” Before you could even respond, Wanda crashed her lips to yours, claiming you in a fiery kiss. When you could finally catch up, you kissed her back, arousal replacing any caution that you might have had. You felt her sure hands run a path down your shoulders, her palms smoothly passing over your chest and massaging your breasts roughly, pulling a strangled moan from your lips that she easily swallowed. She kissed you this way for a long moment, enjoying the way you squirmed, the way you gasped in utter surrender, until it wasn’t enough anymore. In a swift motion, she grabbed both ends of your shirt and pulled roughly, her strong hands tearing the buttons and sending them flying across the room. “I told you not to wear this today.” She reminded as she pulled your ruined shirt open to take a look at your breasts in their pretty pink bra. She held them in her hands, mouth watering at the thought of sucking on your nipples and making you moan, until she remembered that she was meant to be punishing you right now. With a smile she pulled your bra down, the cups folding under your breasts and leaving them exposed in an obscene way. “Get on your knees.” Wanda demanded, her hands pushing against your shoulders, until you obeyed, sinking down to your knees and looking up at her. She unbuttoned her pants with pointed slowness as she looked down to meet your eyes. “You couldn’t help yourself could you?” She asked as she undid the zipper next. “Your pussy is such a needy little thing that it couldn’t stay empty even for a night, right? It was so needy that you couldn’t listen to Mommy even for a day.” She accused, pulling her pants down her legs, exposing her underwear and the wet patch on it. She took them off too, bringing them to your eyes as her wetness glistened under the light. “And you just had to tease me, didn’t you?” She asked as she threw the ruined panties somewhere on the floor. Unsure what to say, or perhaps because some part of you knew it was better if you said nothing at all, you stayed silent for a few seconds as she stared you down and when she didn’t receive a response, magic erupted from her fingers, red tendrils curling around her and starting to take shape that you soon recognized was one of the straps the two of you owned. Magic swirled around it a bit longer and when it disappeared, Wanda watched you gulp as you took the toy in. It was in no way your biggest one, but it was sizable enough and a voice in your head told you where it was going even before Wanda spoke. “You’ve been such a cock-hungry little slut today.’’ She mused as she ran her thumb over your lips, before she pushed it in your mouth, smiling when you took it in eagerly and started to suck, your eyes closing as you savoured the moment. “Begging for it every chance you got. Well, here it is, baby.’’ She growled, taking her cock and guiding it closer to your face with a smirk. “And you better take it all down your throat, or I leave you like this!” She threatened, pulling her thumb out of your mouth and quickly replacing it with the toy. The moment her cockhead entered your mouth you both sighed. Just this caused more wetness to pool between your legs and with no barrier it started to smear across your thighs as you tried to work more of her into your mouth, until she hit the back of your throat. A small, involuntary gag, caused Wanda to moan once more and you wondered if she could feel your mouth around her, she certainly had the power to make it happen if she wanted to. So you decided to test your theory. You pulled off of her cock, until only her tip was inside and you swirled your tongue over it, before taking her back in as deep as you could. Her reaction was instantaneous, a loud moan gracing your ears, followed by one of her hands taking a few strands of your hair to steady you against her. She could definitely feel you. And you wondered if she could have always done that and why she chose to do it now for the first time. “Clever girl.” Wanda praised, realizing that you had discovered what she used her magic for and she started to move with you, building a rhythm that had her throwing her head back. “Let’s see if Mommy’s cock can erase all these thoughts from your head.” She rasped, taking hold of you with her other hand as well and driving her hips forward, until her cock hit the back of your throat again. You tried to keep your mouth open, stifling a small gag and forcing yourself to take her in a little bit deeper. The thought of being left untouched was motivation enough, but the knowledge that she could feel you, that you can please her, make her feel good, make her cum, had you desperate to take her all the way in. Wanda sensed your vigour, felt your excitement and she knew the source of it. She wasn’t even sure which one of you wanted it more at this point, her body shuddering under the immense pleasure of this new feeling she was experiencing. The feeling of your tongue gliding on the underside of her shaft and swirling over her head, your lips tightly wrapped around her as most of her shaft was encased in your wet, warm mouth was unlike any other and she had to hold back from bucking her hips and gagging you even more. And God, she was tempted. “Take a deep breath for me.” Wanda instructed, pulling back to give you a second to comprehend her words and do as you’re told. You tried to nod as much as you could, your chest heaving and your eyes watery as they looked up at Wanda. “God, you look so pretty like this, with your beautiful eyes looking up at me like that.” She admired you openly, her voice growing hoarse as everything inside her screamed to ruin you. She drove her hips forward, her movements deliberately slow and gentle and you knew a deep thrust was coming, so you did your best to keep your mouth open as you felt her drive her cock into your mouth, hitting the back of your throat and making you want to gag, a reflex you tried to hold back as she pushed deeper, stopping an inch from the base of her strap. “Breathe, baby.” She soothed, as she repeated the action a few more times, allowing you to get used to her and the new feeling. “Keep your pretty eyes on me.” She demanded, a hand cupping your cheek. “I want you to look at me.” When Wanda knew you were ready, she pulled back a little, allowing you another deep breath, before she thrust back in, this time not stopping until she felt you take her all the way and she let a deep moan at the feeling of it. “There we go. Who knew you’re such a good little cock-sucker?” She moaned once more, holding you against her, her eyes closing in pure bliss. She could feel your throat constricting in a stifled gag, squeezing her cock deliciously and making her gasp with delight, your struggle only adding to her excitement. Cautiously, she pulled back, allowing you to breathe, taking the toy, which she progressively started to think of as her cock, out of your mouth for a moment as she looked at you, lips swollen and eyes watery, chest heaving as you admired her as much as she did you. “More, please.” You rasped, repositioning yourself, the hardwood floor unforgiving on your knees, but you didn’t care. “You want more, baby girl?” She asked as she stroked your cheek affectionately. “You want Mommy to cum down your throat?” “Yes, please!” You licked your lips subconsciously, mouth watering at the thought that she could do that. That you would taste her. “Good girl.” She praised, taking hold of her cock and guiding it back to your parted lips. “But baby?” She paused making sure she had your full attention. “If you can’t take it all the way down, Mommy will cum on your pretty tits instead and she won’t let you taste even a drop! Understood?” The threat in her voice was clear and you couldn’t believe how much your body responded, hating the prospect of wasting even a drop. You tried to nod, but you knew it wouldn’t be enough for her and you weren’t surprised when she pulled back, so she’d allow you to speak. “Yes, Mommy.” You said with a smile, lips parting as you waited for her to put her cock back in your mouth. She started to move slowly, allowing you to adjust once more as she got closer and closer. She could feel her orgasm building, impossible to ignore as you sucked her eagerly, letting her guide you the way she wanted. Each time her cock sinking deeper, until she could feel you take all of her once more. And as soon as you did, she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold back much longer. She pulled away, allowing you to breathe for a second. “Show me how much you want my cum.” She rasped, thrusting forward and feeling her cock twitch as she started to come. You braced yourself for it, eagerly sucking her as she stilled, not wanting to waste a single drop of her delicious cum, by letting it spill and you watched her throw her head back as her orgasm washed over her, feeling her legs shake under your palms and you reached behind her to support her better. You felt each spurt of white as she moaned in pleasure and you helped her ride it out as best you could, fighting your body as it screamed for air, screamed for you to pull away, but you refused. Not before she was done. Her pleasure was intoxicating, making your own pussy twitch with need and even more wetness to leak out and smear over your entrance and thighs. For a moment there, while Wanda came into your mouth and stood still against you, it seemed that she had calmed. That your earlier transgressions had been forgiven. Her face was serene and relaxed, while she tried to take steady breaths, but as soon as she pulled out and looked down at you, teary eyes trained on her while you tried to let your throat relax and breathe, her rage returned. She picked you up from the floor with a gentle hand, steadying you on your wobbly legs and using her magic to strip you entirely, guiding you to the bed, so she can practically throw you on it. “Get on your hands and knees.” She demands, swiftly following after you and positioning herself behind you. Before you could react, before you had a chance to even comprehend her instructions, she was pulling you up and propping you in the position she required, her impatience obvious. Her hungry eyes zeroed in on the way your back arched, on your ass, that you kept up in the air for her, on your wet pussy and the glistening evidence of your arousal and she had to smirk. You were so ripe for the taking. “Look at that…” She mused, her hands taking hold of you once more, her palms kneading your ass. “You’re all wet.” She said smugly. “Did sucking my cock get you this wet?” She asked as she spread your cheeks to take a better look at you. With your face flushed and your mind starting to melt from the prospect of being fucked, you could hardly say anything. Wanda’s filthy words making their way to your ears and making you blush even more, there was no way you could respond. Unfortunately for you, your silence only infuriated Wanda more and her hands retracted, only for her to land a harsh slap on your ass, pulling a surprised gasp from you. “I asked you a question baby girl.” She said with a stern tone, another slap landing on your other cheek. “If I have to repeat myself, I’ll have to assume that you don’t want to get fucked. Is that the case, honey?” She asked with mocking softness in her tone. “I want to get fucked, please!” You managed to say as you whined a little into the mattress. “I bet you do…” She mused as she ran a finger through your wetness, just to tease you. “You’re so wet. I’ve never seen you this wet before. Is that all from sucking my cock?” She asked once more, retracting her finger and licking it clean. “Yes, Mommy.” You responded softly, your cheeks heating up just from the thought. “Well, if you weren’t such a bad girl today, perhaps you would have gotten what you wanted right now…” She said sternly. “But you just couldn’t wait, could you?” She accused, landing another slap on your ass, watching it turn faint pink. “You had to go and touch yourself!” She growled, each hit growing harder. The skin on her palm stung from spanking you, but she ignored it, letting out her anger as she continued to list your transgressions. “Did you think that I wouldn’t find out? Or did you forget that only I’m allowed to touch that greedy little pussy?” She asked, each sentence a new slap that had you moaning into the mattress. It was the perfect mixture of pain and pleasure. “Or maybe you did it to get my attention…” She mused, pausing for a second and using her fingers to tease your entrance again, gliding along your slit and touching your clit briefly, but retracting, before you had a chance to really enjoy the pleasure of it. “What will your family think, I wonder?’’ She asked, resuming her spanking. “What would they say if they saw you today? If they knew you were trying to touch me under the blanket, with them right next to us!’’ She hissed at the memory. “If they saw you wore no panties to their dinner table! That you were showing off your pussy and ass, like a common whore, when they could have walked in at any second!’’ Just the thought had her head spinning. The sound of each slap and each one of your corresponding moans spurring her on more. “What would they say if they knew you were so hungry for my cock you couldn’t wait till we’re alone?! That you swallowed all my cum and still wanted more. That I’m spanking your ass to punish you, yet your pussy fucking leaks.’’ She continued, pointedly running her fingers through your wetness, circling your clit just to pull away again. “I bet it wants my cock so much. I left you needy this morning, huh? You had to have it that badly.” She growled, your ass turning red by the end of it. “Yes, please!” You finally responded, almost screaming, your hips trying to push into her and get some of the friction you needed. “Mommy, please!” You begged, hoping to soften her. “Next time you want my cock that badly, ask nicely!” “But I did!” You try to protest. You knew that your impatience and neediness had gotten you here, that you had earned your punishment, but you couldn’t help the way your pussy pulsed and twitched with need for her. “Don’t you dare talk back at me after all the stunts you pulled.” Wanda growls, a loud smack reaching your ears before you even felt it. It was the hardest so far and yet, so delicious you moaned. Wanda paused to admire her work, your face flushed, your pussy somehow wetter than before and your ass the perfect shade of red. If she could, she’d take a picture of you right now, so she could remember this moment forever. Satisfied, she teased your pussy once more, a single finger running through your wetness, sometimes stopping at your entrance, as if she would give you what you want and sink inside, only to pull away again. “I shouldn’t even be indulging you right now.” She told you sternly. “I should leave you like this. Teach you a lesson about patience. But if I do, you’ll just spend the night trying to touch yourself.” She said accusingly, the tip of her finger dipping in, before she pulled out again. “And we can’t have that, can we?” “Please!” You whimpered, your voice a little broken as Wanda continued to tease you. “You’re so pretty when you beg.” Wanda complimented, allowing her finger to dip inside you again, before she retracted it. “Please, Mommy!” You squirmed, your whole body on fire. “Please, what? What should I do, when you’ve been such a bad girl, huh?” She asked as she leaned in closer, her body pressing into you, her cock grazing your thigh and her hands running over your back. “Please, fuck me!” You begged openly, whining when she pulled away from you again. There was a moment of silence between you, a moment when you could almost hear the gears in her head turning, while she was deciding if she was going to give in, or punish you further and you waited with bated breath as she took her time. Eventually her fingers returned, soft and gentle as she explored you and you audibly sighed in relief as she found your clit and circled it slowly. She took her time to do it in a way that left you breathless and desperate for more. When your moans turned to whines of frustration, she retracted shortly, watching fear rise within you at the prospect of being left like this, before she dipped a finger in your entrance. She let it sink in entirely this time, meeting no resistance as you welcomed her. She moved in and out of you with slow precision, dragging out your pleasure even from this, only adding a second finger, when she was satisfied with your desperate state. The delicious stretch that her fingers provided had you moaning, your walls squeezing her in, refusing to let her go even for a second. Had it not been for the soundproof spell she had put on your room, the whole house would have heard you and you were grateful for this small mercy as she quickened her pace, starting to build you up. “My little brat!” She admired you, fingers pumping in even harder. “Has Mommy been soft on you all this time? Perhaps I let you get your way too much.” She added, watching you struggle to speak, struggle to think of something to say. “Or maybe you wanted to be punished. Is that it, little brat?” “No! No, Mommy.” You manage to say through broken moans as she hits an especially sensitive spot inside you. “Is this a good spot, baby?” She asks, hitting it again and watching you almost melt into the mattress. “Are you going to cum all over my fingers?” “Yes, Mommy, please!” You whimper as you get so close, your orgasm about to hit you. To your dismay, she pulls away, leaving you empty and smiling viciously when you whine in frustration. “You don’t deserve it.” She says coldly, flipping you over, so you can face her. She crawls over you like a predator, her eyes fiery and full of emotion. “Luckily for you, I’m in a generous mood.” She adds in a low growl, shifting her weight, so she could prop herself on one arm, the other returning back to your entrance and pushing slowly inside. She angled them as before, hitting that glorious spot within you every time, watching your eyes flutter closed at the feeling. Despite still being angry with you, she couldn’t help but feel a sort of reverence towards you, a sort of internal pull, something deep inside her loving to see your pleasured expression, loving to be the cause of it. And a primal urge to do it over and over again. When you got close again your arms wrapped around her, holding on to her in a way that she adored. You were so precious when you searched for her, arms tightening as if she’d disappear, nails digging into her skin, needing her close. The gesture never failed to warm her heart. “Go on, baby, cum for me, I’ve got you.” She whispered, leaning down to kiss your neck softly and feeling your face nestle against her as you held her even tighter, allowing yourself to finally cum. When your orgasm hit, you practically screamed, body shaking and spasming in pleasure, as powerful waves of it washed over your body. The intensity grew exponentially, surprising even you and you were glad that you had Wanda to hold on to, feeling as if you’d get lost in it without her. She helped you ride it out, whispering soft praises as she moved inside you, revelling in the feeling of your walls pulsing around her fingers and only pulling out when she knew you grew sensitive to her touch. She brought her fingers up, inspecting them with a satisfied grin, before she pried your lips open and pushed her fingers in your mouth, making you clean them off with your tongue, watching your blissed out face. When you let them go with a pop, recovering somewhat, Wanda kissed you deeply, exploring your mouth and getting a taste of you that only fuelled her desire. “You taste so good, baby girl.” She smiled down at you, mischief in her eyes and she started to descend your body. “So delicious. I just have to try for myself.” She decides, settling between your spread legs and diving straight in. Her tongue swirled over your clit delicately, feeling it twitch under her. She had left it neglected until now and she loved the way you arched your back just from the smallest stimulation on it. She repeated the action slowly, licking a line straight from your opening up to your clit and your long sigh of pleasure was like music to her ears. Loving to tease you, she let her tongue push against your entrance a few times, keeping your legs open with her strong arms and feeling you trying to open them even further. “My greedy little brat.” She spoke roughly, one of her hands slapping your thigh, before she took it away. Her fingers found their way back inside you before you even had a chance to respond and she focused her efforts back on your clit, the intensity of it taking your breath away. Your back arched as you silently took everything she was giving you, feeling overwhelmed in the best possible way. “Mommy!” You moaned when her fingers curled inside you, building your next orgasm quickly. She wasted no time in swirling her tongue over your clit in delicious circles, knowing how much you loved the feeling. As the pleasure grew more intense, you couldn’t help but wish that you could stay in this moment, but your body didn’t listen, climbing higher and getting closer to the edge and Wanda was delighted. She kept hitting that same spot determined to have you cry out for her again and from the looks of it, it wouldn’t take long. “Mommy, I’m so close!” You squirmed, almost pulling away from her, but she wouldn’t let you. Your fingers laced in her hair almost instinctively, needing to touch her, to feel close to her, the muscles in your body tightening as you reached the edge. The feeling of it wasn’t sudden, you knew it was coming, yet you weren’t prepared for how intense it would be, or how powerfully the orgasm that followed would affect you. It started at the pit of your stomach, spreading over your entire body like a tidal wave, quickly taking over all your senses, until all you could feel was pleasure. Wanda’s tongue felt like it was brushing against all the best spots at once, and her fingers moved deep inside you, making your legs tremble, helping you ride it all out. The feeling of it was so deeply satisfying, that you didn’t want it to ever end. When it did, you practically melted, your chest heaving as you tried to breathe through your high, feeling Wanda crawl over you with a grin on her face. “That was amazing.” You said, your eyes closed and clearly thinking she was done with you. “Good.” She practically purred, leaning down to kiss you, her tongue easily invading your mouth and letting you taste yourself once more. She hovered above you for a few seconds, admiring the calm content on your face, your attention so focused on her eyes that you didn’t even notice when one of her hands sneaked between your bodies, taking hold of her cock, until she was lining it up with your entrance. “Oh my God!” You took a deep breath, waiting for the moment she would fill you, your words morphing into gasps as she stretched you, bottoming out in one smooth motion. “Did you think we’re done, little brat?” She asked as she lets you adjust to her. Every part of her screamed at the urge to just fuck you, overwhelmed by the indescribable feeling of being inside you. “After what you did today, I’m not stopping, until you’re so fucked out, you can’t even scream anymore.” She practically growled, pulling out half-way, so she could thrust inside you again. She couldn’t help herself. This truly was unlike anything she’d ever felt and she wondered why it took her so long to try. Getting to fuck your mouth and cum down your throat was spectacular, yes, but being inside you was heavenly. Your walls were hugging her tightly, squeezing and pulsing around her, your wet pussy welcoming her. This is where she belonged, where she wanted to stay, snugly nestled deep inside you and feeling every shudder, every tremble and twitch as she fucked you, getting to swallow all your moans as she kissed you deeply. “Fuck! You feel so good.” She grunted, thrusting even harder, her pace gradually building, causing surges of pleasure every time she bottomed out. “Such a tight little pussy.” She murmured to herself, thinking she might not last with the way you felt. You tried to meet her thrusts, your body caught between wanting to cum and already feeling overwhelmed, but she wouldn’t let you. Her strong arms held you down, forcing you to spread your legs even more, so she could hit an even deeper spot inside you. She took both your wrists, pinning them above your head and staring you down, as if daring you to defy her. She was nowhere near done with you and she wasn’t going to let you think that she had so easily forgiven you. After all, she still needed to teach you a lesson. “Mommy.” You whine, your pretty eyes looking up at her and pleading for something you couldn’t voice. “Does it feel good, sweetheart?” She asks, watching you arch your back and snapping her hips, pulling a gasp from you. “Feels so good, yes!” You manage between small moans. “Show me.” She demands, rolling on her side and taking you with her, until suddenly you were on top and she was smirking at you. “Ride that cock.” She instructed smugly, her hands starting to guide your hips. You tried to take it slow, but Wanda wouldn’t let you, pushing you to match the rhythm she had previously set, watching your breasts bounce above her. She was so deep inside you at this angle, her eyes devouring the way you moved. In the heat of the moment you reached down to play with your nipples, forgetting yourself, until she pushed them away harshly. “Put your hands behind your back.” She instructed, catching the momentary hesitation in your eyes. “Don’t make me do it for you.” She warned and you did as you’re told, intertwining your fingers behind you and feeling her magic envelop them in invisible ropes. “These are mine to play with, remember?” She smirked, reaching up to roll your nipples between her fingers, pulling even more moans from you as your hips stuttered for a moment. Wanda made you ride her like this, enjoying the way you teased yourself, your pace too slow to take you over the edge. Your little frustrated moans and whimpers only made it sweeter. She could admire you like this for hours, if it wasn’t for her own orgasm that kept building and growing, until she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold it back for much longer. That’s when her hands gripped your hips, guiding you to move faster, her own hips joining your efforts and meeting you half way, driving her cock deeper than she’s ever been, pulling a series of loud moans from you, your head thrown back. “How does that cock feel, baby girl?” She panted. “So good!” You whined, breathless. “I’m so full.” “Oh, you have no idea, honey.” Wanda smirked, feeling you squeezing her cock. “Wait till Mommy pumps you full of her cum. Then you’ll be really full.” She promised in a growl, her hips picking up their speed. “Oh my God, please!” You rasped, your walls twitching with anticipation. “Yeah? You want it? Are you going to keep it inside, baby? Mommy will be very disappointed if you waste it.” “I’ll keep it.” You promised in a daze, knowing you were on the edge and seconds away from falling off it. “Please, just let me cum, please.” You begged, feeling that tightening that signalled your orgasm. “You wanna cum all over Mommy’s cock, honey?” She teased, knowing you’re so close and feeling herself ready to explode. “Please, please, please!” You whined, about to do it, regardless if she allowed it or not and bracing yourself. “You can cum. Go on, cum with me.” She encouraged, delivering one final thrust and burying herself as deep inside you as he could. The orgasm that washed over her body was unlike anything she’d ever felt. Wave after wave in rapid succession, each one more satisfying than the last. Your pussy was squeezing her tightly through it, pulsing and milking her cock, hungry for every drop of her cum. Enveloped in you, she felt bliss and she wanted to prolong it as much as possible, thrusting inside you in irregular motions, until she was spent. Above her, you were lost in your own little world of pleasure, head thrown back, with your hair falling behind you in waves as you came. You could feel the ropes of cum as she filled you up, felt the way your pussy spasmed as you came, each twitch a new surge of orgasmic bliss as you fell apart. Distantly, you could hear Wanda moan below you, felt her fingers digging into your flesh as she held on to you and it only made it better, her thrusts only stopping when you both couldn’t take anymore. “Fuck!” She cursed, helping you to get off of her and laying you on the bed. You felt her get up and had you been more coherent, you might have questioned why she didn’t release your arms, still tied behind your back, but as it was, you could hardly even think. Wanda got off the bed in a slow, lazy motion, admiring your spent body and the way you panted. In your helpless state and with her cum leaking out of your pussy, you looked even more fuckable and a sense of primal desire took over her. She took hold of your ankles and pulled you down, towards the edge of the bed, until your feet touched the floor and you were left bent over the bed. In a swift motion, you felt Wanda spread your legs more, opening you up to her, so she could have a better look at you. Another drop of her cum leaked out of you, pulled down by gravity, until Wanda stopped it with a finger and pushed it back in, pulling a surprised gasp from your throat. She watched the way her finger disappeared inside you and you moaned in frustration, feeling overstimulated and needy at the same time. “Didn’t I tell you to keep my cum inside?” She questioned from above you, her eyes turning dark again. A fact that would have brought more alertness to you if you had seen it. “Such a bad girl. Defying Mommy all day…” “Mommy…” You moaned, not really sure what to say. “That’s ok, sweetheart. Mommy will just have to fill you up again.” She explained in a low, soothing tone, lining up her cock with your entrance once more. “Mommy, I’m so sensitive.” You tried to protest, feeling her tip gathering your wetness and the stray drops of her cum, involuntarily pulling away from the contact as it brought another jolt of overstimulation. “Oh no, don’t you try to squirm away from me.” She hissed, taking hold of you, firm and unwavering. “You’ve been begging me to fuck you all day. Parading yourself for me, teasing me, so I would drag you back here.” She said through her teeth. “You asked for this, now you’re going to take it. Isn’t that right?” She asked, her hand landing harshly on your ass and reminding you of the earlier spanking you had received. “Yes, Mommy.” You nod eagerly, feeling excited, despite how overworked your body felt. You loved it when she got like this. When she left behind her inhibitions and took what she wanted. “Go on, beg me to fuck you.” Wanda commanded, pushing the tip of her cock inside you and watching you gasp just from this. “Please, Mommy, fuck me.” You begged, anticipation building inside you and culminating in a deep thrust that buried her entire strap inside you. You moaned together, Wanda feeling a little overstimulated herself, but ignoring it, focusing entirely on the way your fists clenched at the feeling of her bottoming out. There really was nothing quite like it and she revelled in it. She remained pressed up against you, letting you feel the entirety of her length, while she ran her hands over your back and shoulders soothingly, bringing a sense of calmness and comfort. The sensation of her being still inside you was oddly arousing, a kind of teasing you hadn’t experienced before and you made an effort to move in your limited range of motion, only for her to snap her hips forward and pin you in place. “Oh my God!” You groaned. “Impatient, aren’t you, little kitten?” She smirked, pulling back and burying her entire length in you again. “Mommy, please!” You whined, incapable of escaping from her merciless, deep thrusts. “Oh, what’s the matter, baby? You were begging for my cock, now it’s too much for you, huh?” Before you can answer, another thrust came, making any words die in your throat, replaced by moans and whimpers. Her movement was calculated, using slow, deep thrusts that forced you to feel the entirety of her. Somehow her cock seemed bigger to you now, filling you to the brim and pushing out all thoughts, all feelings that weren’t her. Gradually, she started moving faster, building a rhythm, her hands on your hips, holding on to you tightly. Your mouth had fallen open at this point, small pants and whimpers leaving you as you tried to take everything she was giving you. It was both too much and not enough, leaving you trapped between a haze of lust and overstimulation. Watching you like this, Wanda couldn’t help herself. She reached a hand, taking a fistful of your hair and guiding you up, her other hand wrapping around you to support you. She nuzzled her face in your shoulder, leaving kisses and bites there while she fucked you. “Fuck, Mommy!” You moaned, calling out to her. “Hush, little kitten.” She silenced you quickly, the hand she had around you reaching up, two of her fingers finding their way into your mouth. “There you go. Suck on Mommy’s fingers.” She soothed, her hips picking up their speed. The dirtiness of it all did not escape you, yet you couldn’t help but open your mouth more, accepting her fingers to the knuckles, your tongue lapping at them, mirroring the way you had sucked her cock earlier. “That’s right. My dirty little girl.” She praised with a smile. When they were nice and wet, she pulled them out, smirking at the needy whines of protest you let out. “What’s the matter, honey? You miss having Mommy down your throat?” She almost mocked, her wet fingers tweaking your nipples, before trailing down and settling between your legs. “Maybe when I’m done fucking your sweet little pussy, I’ll put you back on your knees.” She suggested, parting your folds and settling her fingers on your clit, rubbing it in small circles. The filthy insinuation of her words only heightened the feeling of pleasure inside you, your orgasm building. Her thrusts were relentless, now almost rough and demanding. She could feel you respond to her dirty talk, your walls clenching around her at the thought of being used more. Wanda could tell you were close, the knowledge spurring her on. She wanted to watch you fall apart. She added a little pressure to the way she rubbed your clit, her hips slapping against your every time she slammed her strap inside you, her other hand leaving your hair and settling across your chest, palming one of your breasts. She pinched the nipple, rolling it and she pulled you as close to her as she could, so she could leave sloppy kisses across your neck. “Mommy I’m so close!” You almost screamed, feeling her everywhere, practically surrounded by Wanda. “I know, baby…” She moaned against you. “You can cum.” She whispered. Her fingers tightened around your breast, bracing herself for the moment you’ll let go, her senses attuned to every small sign. She felt it as it started, your body stiffening, even your moans dying down as you reached the edge, but Wanda fucked you right through it, right up until the moment you moaned out her name and started to fall apart. Your pussy gripped her cock, pulsing around her, coaxing her to come with you. The feeling of your pleasure was so sweet and enticing, your pleading soft, whimpers an invitation she couldn’t resist, so she obliged your body’s demand, drawing out your pleasure with stuttering thrusts. Her fingers continued to circle your clit steadily, heightening every small wave of orgasmic bliss, enjoying the way each twitch of your pussy would add to her own pleasure, until you finally came down from your high and she held your shaking body against her, enjoying the aftershocks that surged through both of you, placing small kisses on your neck and shoulders. When you had calmed, she released your hands, helping you climb into bed, before using her magic to take off the harness and the attached dildo and settling next to you into bed. “Learned your lesson, baby?” She asked teasingly, pulling you against her, letting you settle on her chest and wrapping her arms around you. “I don’t know… I enjoyed that quite a lot.” You teased her back, a smile plastered on your face. Tired and knowing you probably couldn’t take anymore, Wanda let it slide, letting you fall asleep, her own breaths evening out as she thought of everything that happened. * * * The next morning came sooner than you hoped for, feeling tired and wishing you could sleep in, but you knew you shouldn’t. You turned to stop your alarm, but hit the snooze instead, huffing in disapproval and lying back down. Wanda usually woke up before you, she certainly never missed an alarm, so when you didn’t feel her stir, you settled, grateful to have a few more minutes, pressing your back to her front and feeling her arms pulling you towards her until there was no space between you. “Good morning, my love.” She whispered in your ear. “Good morning, love.” You whispered back, feeling her hand run down your arm and continuing its path across your sides and down your legs. Involuntarily, you closed your eyes, your backside pressing into her at the intimate, gentle feeling. “Look at you…” Wanda gasped, her voice filled with awe and admiration. “So beautiful.” She whispered against your ear, her voice still rough from sleep, sending a shiver down your spine. “So soft.” She muttered, her tongue tracing your lobe. “So sweet and tender.” She murmured, entranced by the feeling of having you in her arms. Wanda could stay here for an eternity and never get tired of it. You were everything she needed or wanted. Unfortunately, your alarm went off again and you huffed, hating to pull away to stop it. “We’ll have to get up.” She reminded, propping herself up on one elbow and watching you pout at her. “Can’t we stay in and cuddle a little?” You asked, pulling her arm towards you. “Just a few minutes.” You pleaded, but Wanda could see that spark in your eyes. She knew that glint of mischief, that smile, which meant that you wanted so much more than just cuddles. “We should go downstairs for breakfast.” She tried to remind you, but you weren’t listening. You nestled yourself against her, pushing up your butt into her front like an offering, guiding her arm around you and pulling it up to your face, your lips wrapping around her middle finger before she could stop you, pulling a surprised moan from her throat. “I prefer having you in my mouth.” You stated, pulling her finger out of your mouth just long enough to say it and putting it back, sucking it in deeper. “Careful, dear.” She warned, despite entertaining you and moving her finger in and out of your mouth suggestively. “Don’t you remember what happens to naughty little girls?” “I enjoyed that.” You managed to say, before taking her wrist and guiding her hand, so you could take her finger up to the knuckle. The challenge in your voice did not escape Wanda and she raised an eyebrow at you, watching the side of your face, but you seemed unbothered, sucking onto her finger happily. “I should think of a better punishment then?” She suggested, pulling out her finger and offering you two, which you happily took, whining a little around them and pressing up your butt into her. Wanda indulged you for a few moments longer, letting you get her fingers nice and wet, before she took them away, immediately reaching between your legs and tracing your entrance, to find it wetter than her fingers. “Why punish me, Mommy? We had so much fun…” You tried to argue and while you were too busy trying to grind on the fingers she offered, you missed the swirling red magic that sparked from them. “Because you didn’t learn you lesson.” Wanda’s voice hardened and before you could question it, you felt the tip of her strap pressing into you. She rubbed it against you, getting it wet with your juices while you let out a deeply satisfied sigh at the feeling, happily expecting the moment she’ll enter you and you didn’t have to wait long. In a smooth motion, she buried herself inside you, quickly reminded of how good it felt. The angle was a little awkward at first, but she quickly adjusted, driving her cock in and out of you slowly, allowing herself the moment of enjoyment. She played with your clit right from the start, wanting to get you there quickly, whispering in your ear the entire time.

“Fuck, you feel so good. So tight around me.” She praised, kissing your shoulder, making love to you slowly. She could feel you grinding against her, wanting her to move faster, fuck you harder, but she was determined to keep her movements slow and teasing. Every time you’d try to push yourself against her, she’d stop, burying herself fully inside you and feeling your insides twitch with need and anticipation, squeezing around her cock in a silent plea for more. There was something spectacular about getting to tease you this way, something that brought her a deep sense of fulfilment that went beyond pleasure, or sex. The knowledge that you were hers to play with, hers to tease and fuck, hers to do with as she wished. Her precious little brat. “Mommy, please, don’t tease me.” You begged and to your surprise Wanda obliged you, her hips moving faster against you, her fingers adding more pressure to the way they circled your clit, giving you exactly what you wanted. “Like that, honey? That’s what my pretty girl needs?” She asked softly, kissing and biting your shoulder some more. “Just like that. I’m getting so close.” You practically whined, melting into her hands. “I know, baby. Mommy is close too. She’s about to fill you up with so much cum.” She promised sweetly, her face buried in your neck. “You want that, don’t you, baby?” “Yes, Mommy, I want that so much.” You mewled, getting even closer, feeling that edge approaching and leaving you full of giddy anticipation. “I want to cum with you.” Wanda only hummed, her thrusts getting sloppy and desperate as she felt herself on the edge. She could feel you were close too, almost there. You needed a few seconds longer, but she wasn’t about to give them to you. In a swift motion, her hand moved away from your clit, capturing your arm as a precaution, before allowing herself to let go, her orgasm taking over as she herd you whine at the realization that she wasn’t going to let you cum, but use you for her own pleasure instead. You felt the spurts of cum as she came deep inside you, your pussy reaching the edge, but needing a little more to fall over it. She had timed it perfectly, taking her hand away at the best moment, to make sure that her stuttering thrusts wouldn’t be enough for you. In fact, they only teased you more. Your whines and mewls of protest fell on deaf ears as she rode out the waves of pleasure surging through her body. When she was done, sighing against you with satisfaction, she pulled out, turning you over, so you could lie on your back and using her magic to pin your wrists above your head. With a flick of her wrist, the strap on disappeared and she looked down at you with a devious smirk on her face. You wanted to protest, you wanted to beg actually, plead with her to let you cum, but you knew she wouldn’t, so you kept your mouth shut, struggling against her bonds in a futile attempt to get away from them as she watched you in your frustration. She extended her arm, making sure you could see it well, before magic erupted from her fingers, swirling around them and concentrating above her palm, the thick ropes of red hiding the object she was conjuring until it was ready and it fell on her open palm for you to see. “You know where this is going, don’t you?” She asked with a smirk, letting you examine the small jewelled butt plug she held, the deep red colour of the gem matching her scarlet magic. “Words, darling. I need you to speak to me right now.” She coaxed in a gentle, soothing tone. You knew you could refuse, knew that Wanda was giving you this time to do it if you wanted to and for a moment you struggled to decide. The problem was, your body had decided for you. A fresh wave of arousal had washed over you at the sight of it, your pussy twitching with anticipation, even though you knew this will tease you more than help the need burning inside you. “Yes, Mommy.” You managed to say, meeting her eyes. “I hope that spending the morning with your ass plugged will help you remember to behave yourself.” She smiled, the toy still held up to your eyes. As you watched her, anticipation coursing through both of you, her lesson finally sunk in. You’d think twice, before challenging her or acting up next time. _______________________________________________________ I'm so excited about this fic and I can't wait to hear what you guys think! Disclaimer: The gif is not mine, I will happily give credit if i knew who made it. If you liked this story and you want more, this fic now has a part 2: Face the consequences

#wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff fanfiction #wanda maximoff smut #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x y/n #Scarlet Witch #top!wanda #bottom!reader #Mommy!Wanda #lesbian

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dduane · 4 months

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I found Spock’s World at half price and showed it to me dad and he was like >:[ don’t get that one it’s not good

And then I had to ask myself who I trusted more regarding whether I would enjoy a Spock-centric novel… you or my dad who would be horrified and perhaps offended if he knew the slash fic I have personally written in my life… hmm…

Anyway so I got Spock’s World 😂

If I was in a flippant mood I'd suggest that the people who put the book on the NY Times best-seller list, and kept it there for two months, might have known something your dad doesn't. (Not to mention the people who carefully chose me, over all the other writers then working with them, to do the first Star Trek hardcover.) But that approach is way too easy a reach.

Additionally, I have to be careful about the subject of parental opinions about children's reading, as I have significant negative bias. My own (adoptive) father's takes on my reading preferences were far less than helpful... so as soon as I realized what way his personal wind was inevitably going to be blowing, I made it my business never to allow him to see anything I was reading at all. (Or writing, either. He was firmly on the "It'll never come to anything, it's a waste of your time, and you should give it up and get serious about your life" side of things. To which I silently said "Yeah, no.")

But do I know Spock better than your dad does? I'd say, even leaving my other writing aside, that that's a fair bet. :)

So see what you make of the book. Some people like it: some don't. It's the readers' business to make that call.

I will allow myself this much of a brag, though. I learned not too long ago, in the course of casual conversation, that one of the very best writers I know—one routinely now praised as one of the best writers of the last century, only slowly and belatedly being acknowledged as such—had been recommending Spock's World to other writers: some of whom I didn't know then, but who're good friends of mine now. And frankly, finding out about this turned my brains right around in my head. This man was doing that? Talk about your utterly unexpected validation! Sheesh. It's worth more than any amount of gold.

Anyway: have fun with the book! (And mind the meter-high glass spiders.) :)

#Spock's World #Star Trek #Star Trek novels

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normansnt · 7 months

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As you've likely seen by now, I've been reblogging nearly every Hazbin fic you have, which I apologize if that bothers you at all. I simply see a lack of the x male reader department for this show, which is ironic considering mostly all the characters are queer and so are the creators. So thank you for what you write and how well you write it! I was hoping I could make a request for a part two of a fic I rather liked "(Vox x bar tander!Male reader)" this one specifically. The reader left off having their soul contract bought and offered to be a bartender at the Vee's private bar, and I was wondering what would happen from there?

HIIIIII

THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST

Im really sorry it took so long😭

Also THANK YOU SO MUCH for the reblogs is doesn't bother me at all IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE MY WRITING💗💗

I HOPE YOU LIKE IT, I THINK IT TURNED OUT PRETTY GOOD😌

ENJOY READING LOVELY PEOPLE

Warnings: Attempted Rape, violance V@lentino

Habit of saving

as a thank you pt.2

Vox x bartender!male reader

"I just dont fucking understand why the fuck you prefer the company of a lowly bartender over mine"

You hear Valentino's yelling from the other room, again.

This was not uncommon. Since you became the bartender in the Vees manor Vox visited the bar more often than before.

You guys spent hours talking and just because of the drinks either, he barely drunk anything cuz he was busy talking to you.

However, this of course annoyed Valentino. He wanted Vox's attention purely on himself.

"I don't." Said Vox, you know, like a lier.

"Work has just been really stressful lately and I need more drinks than before."

This was all lies. But Vox was not in the mood to be taking Valentino's shit, he would much rather go get a drink with you.

"Bullshit, I know how your work is and you blame everything on it, you dont even want to fuck me anymore are you a fucking moron do you know how many people want to get with ME."

And here he goes again. Vox was a little embarrassed though. It was true that since you arrived he was never in the mood to do it with Val, but he found himself having much more sex dreams with you.

He got red at the thought of that.

"You know what, I don't fucking care, go be happy with your boy toy; but don't you dare forget that you are where you are because of me." Ended the Argument Valentino as he grabbed a bottle from above your head, and walked out of the room.

You were silent during the whole argument. You knew it was not smart to start defending Vox you tried that once and, well, Vox had to stich you up afterwards.

"Care for a drink, sir?" You asked Vox. He was still, just standing in the middle of the room looking at the door.

He felt weird. Well, not weird, happy. But that was strange. Usually he felt guilty or annoyed when Valentino stormed off after a fight, usually he wanted to go after him. But not now. Now he felt...calm. Relieved even. He really wanted to sit down and have that drink with you.

"Yes, I would love a drink, and I've told you multiple times to call me Vox."

"Yeah I know but I didn't want to risk Val still hearing it." You chuckled.

"So, the usual, Vox?"

"Obviously." He answered back.

"Are you ok?" You asked as you poured his drink. You two were close enough for this not to be an awkward question. You were the bartender, you have comforted him after a night of drunken crying and put him to bed multiple times. He always asked you to stay. You never did. You just didn't feel ready yet.

"Getting better by the day, his antics don't affect me as strongly anymore." He commented calmly.

"I'm glad." You gave him his drink and you two continued talking.

And you talked, long into the night. Vox got a bit drunk again.

"All right mister I think it's time to get you to bed." You said smiling softly as you were about to jump from behind the bar and help him to his room.

"I can take care of him." Came a creepy calm voice from the door way. You saw Valentino.

He had a fake smile on his face. You knew this was trouble but he was kind of your boss.

"All right, sir." You just answered quietly, as Val took Vox and started to take him to his room.

"What-no, you-- (Y/N)--I, don't"

Vox mumbled drunken.

When they left the room you had a silent debate with yourself.

Yes Val was your boss. But you knew that taking advantage of someone while they're drunk was not below him.

"Fuck it" you mumbled to yourself as you jumped from behind the bar and tried to quietly run after them.

Thankfully you found them when they were about to enter the room.

When they got in you made sure to put your foot between the door and the frame so it doesn't close.

You peered into the room and you saw Val throw Vox onto the bed.

"You fucking whore, you couldn't keep your hands of the cute bartender boy could you."

He started angrily as he stepped onto Vox's screen, breaking it. You already wanted to barge in there when you saw this but when he started unbuckling his belt, thats when you snapped.

You jumped on Val, literally. And while the man might be powerful he had close to no muscles so he crumbled under you.

You knew you had close to no chance of winning. But you didn't care. You had to save Vox.

You tried to cut off Val's breathing by holding onto his neck for dear life. You might have been physically stronger he was still an overlord. A very powerful one.

You expected to be thrown down onto the floor any minute when the struggling finally stopped.

Your eyes opened widely as you hurriedly got off of Valentino.

You started panicking. What the fuck did you just kill an overlord? No, no there is no way he is so powerful why didn't he stop you.

You kneeled down and checked for a heart beat.

When you felt faint beating a boulder fell off your shoulder.

"Thank fuck" you commented to yourself. He probably just passed out.

But still why didn't he stop you.

You thought about it a but when it hit you. He was probably batshit drunk himself. You saw that when he walked away from the bar he barely managed to walk straight.

You were still panting.

You looked over at Vox and a strong feeling of sadness filled you.

You stepped over Vals passed out form and lifted up Vox.

He was lighter than you thought. You carried him all the way to your room where you knew you had a first aid kit.

Sure you could have just bring the first aid kit to him but you were not going to leave him alone with Valentino jot even for a second. Not even when they're both passed out.

After you put Vox's screen back together and batched him up you laid him down onto your bed.

This gave you time to think things through.

Even you couldn't explain to yourself why you cared about Vox this much.

Its true you have become very close during your time working here.

But there are people who you have known longer yet do not love as much as him.

...love?

You love him?

"(Y/N)"

While you were occupied with your thought you didn't notice the time. It was morning already.

"Yeah, Vox?"

"What the fuck happened?" He asked as he started touching his patched up screen.

You told him everything. You also told him that you will very likely have to leave because once Val wakes up...you don't want to know what he'll do to you.

"He can't do anything your soul is mine you are under my protection." He said firmly. He sat silently after that. Like someone who is contemplating something.

"Can I ask you something?"

He asked after a long silence.

"Of course"

"Why did you save me?"

This surprised you.

"Well, I mean I know what Val is like and...I just did what any normal person would do really-"

"No. You know no one in hell would to that for the demon that owns their soul. Not to mention this was the second time you saved me."

"...I honestly don't know why I did it the first time; I guess I just felt like...I dont know"

"And the second time."

You couldn't answer this. You knew the answer but you didn't want to say it.

"Well, you are a nice boss you treat me with kindness and-"

"No one would attack a powerful overlord just to safe their boss who is just 'nice'; try answering truthfully this time."

Well fuck. You knew Vox was a smart man but that didn't help you in this situation.

"I..." you didn't know what to do. You could come up with another lie but he would detect it no problem.

"I love you" you blurted out before you could stop yourself. The moment the words left your lips you smacked your hands onto your lips.

"I'm sorry sir I will leave-"

Vox took your hand in his when you wanted to stand up and pulled you towards him.

With one swift movement he placed his lips on your in a tender kiss.

You have never kissed a screen before but you were pretty sure it wasn't supposed to be like this.

His lips were soft but cold. It was an amazing kiss.

"Oh, you're not going anywhere." Said Vox while he let out a little chuckle.

"Because I love you too."

#male reader #hazbin x reader #hazbin x you #hazbin hotel x male reader #male y/n #hazbin hotel #hazbin vox #vox x male reader #vox x reader #hazbin hotel vox

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torukmaktoskxawng · 4 months

Text

tsamsiyu ta'em - calm before the storm

Masterlist - part seventeen

Summary: Just as the chapter's title suggests. It was the calm before the storm…

Pairing: Ronal/Tonowari/Original Female Character

Tag: #tsamsiyu ta'em fic

posted on ao3

Word Count: 11k+

Warnings: Fluff! Some awkwardness that happens after one makes a confession lol. Trauma regarding torture, loss of a child, body dysmorphia, etc. There's a plot twist at the end of this chapter ;)

Taglist (bold indicates "could not tag"): @motheroffae @undeniableadrenaline @mooniequeen @shit-i-say-shit-i-think @heart-an0n @amiets2 @slutforsmut4ever @yeosxxx @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @sucker4angstt @inolaphoenix @ilovechickenwings @tojisleftarm @andyfromku @ivysully @lightandshadow31 @jamie-poopoo @brittney69 @avatar-lover @ikeyniofthetayrangi @cardi-bre91

A/n: Hiii 🥰 I'm very sorry for the hiatus that I originally promised wasn't going to be a hiatus. To escape life, I dove into other fixations such as Destiny 2, the Fallout show, Dune Part 2, and Bridgerton... yeah, I did some bouncing. So far, my summer has been fantastic! Anyway, here's another chapter before I inevitably disappear again 😂

Enjoy!

If there was anything Kayla was extremely grateful for, it was that Spider didn't have a heightened sense of smell as the Na'vi did.

She could smell both Ronal and Tonowari on her skin, and while it internally delighted her, she felt her skin prickle at the thought of Spider of all people being traumatized and learning about her very recent courting by smell alone as they share close quarters with one another. The thought mortified her more than anything, more than the idea of eventually having to tell Jake.

Thankfully, Spider returned home that day none the wiser, Ronal and Tonowari already long gone even with their scents still lingering in Kayla's nose. She felt like a teenager again, embarrassed and trying to hide it from her parents. However, she quickly stomped down that thought at the harsh reminder that she's a grown-ass woman and Spider wasn't a very judgemental kid. He was also someone who had caught onto Ronal and Tonowari's interest in Kayla early on and wouldn't be surprised if he learned the truth.

With that in mind, Kayla emerged from her kelku the next morning wearing the new top the Metkayina clan leaders had gifted her. For a very brief moment, she felt exposed and uncomfortable, the woven beads cool against her skin, but then, she looked down at herself and felt her body relax to see that the top covered just about as much as her threadbare red shirt did. It wasn't even close to revealing as some of the tops Kayla had seen Na'vi women wear, even with the low cut. A small part in the back of Kayla's head felt delighted to realize that this top was definitely made for her.

She still wore her shorts, but the small change in attire was still noticeable as she quickly learned. Na'vi eyes silently observed her as she walked through the village, and even though she heard the Metkayina whisper as she passed them, they weren't hateful or disgusted, but more in awe. Her skin crawled because she didn't know if she preferred it or would much rather have them feel indifferent to her again.

While their eyes all noticed her top, Kayla almost felt the need to throw her shirt back over herself at the thought that the Metkayina might also smell her new scent as well. It would explain the way their noses would twitch and their ears all perk up and turn in her direction when they haven't even noticed her presence yet.

If Spider noticed any of it, he didn't say a word, instead, he informed Kayla that he would be deep-diving with the other reef boys that afternoon. Something crawled in her stomach at the reminder of Ao'nung and other reef boys leaving Lo'ak alone outside the reef before she sternly told Spider to make sure either Lo'ak or Tsireya was with them. Apart from the small, suspicious stare, Spider didn't question her, taking his new bow in hand and heading out to meet his friends, waving back to Kayla as he went and promising to be back before supper.

Walking along the beach, Kayla recognized the tsahik from a mile away, fingers entangled in a worn fishing net. As Kayla walked over to the other woman, she watched the way Ronal's ears lifted and moved in her direction. Ronal looked up from her work and recognized Kayla from a distance, and by the time the dreamwalker approached her, it wasn't hard to deduce how pleased she looked, eyes dancing approvingly over the avatar woman's figure, reaching a hand out to lightly adjust the top on Kayla before nodding once with confidence,

"It suits you perfectly. I was afraid it would not be able to hold up against your beauty."

Despite having a young Na'vi body, Kayla felt as though her heart was ready to give out, her feet barely catching when she initially stumbled in reaction to Ronal's compliment. Kayla's eyes quickly averted, the tip of her ears feeling warm as she quietly thanked the tsahik and changed the subject, making plans to see both her and Tonowari later. After making a brief conversation as to what each other's plans were for the day, Kayla had turned to leave but nearly jolted out of her skin when she felt a gentle tug on her tail. She couldn't help the feigned glare she threw back at Ronal, internally delighted by the rare mischief she saw in the Metkayina woman's eyes, but trying not to show it. Kayla's fake irritation only appeared to amuse Ronal forward, the tsahik tilting her head at the avatar while appreciatively staring her up and down once more, forcing the heat from Kayla's ears to travel down her neck.

The avatar cleared her throat and then finally departed, hiding her own smile as she thought back to Ronal's well-hidden playful behavior. It was nothing like the woman who sharply tugged Kayla's tail the day they first met, further showing just how much things have changed around here.

Summoning an ilu, Kayla makes her way through the reef, reaching the atoll wall where all the various pools travel up one side like stairs, catching various sealife whenever the tide rises up and down. Dozens of Metkayina are fishing and gathering in these pools, with nets, and baskets at their feet. Kayla zeros in on one particular Na'vi and swims over after letting her ilu take off, climbing up onto the slippery wall to make her way over to her friend.

Rutxa looks up and appears smug at the sight of Kayla, blue eyes pointedly narrowed on the avatar's new top while dramatically sniffing the air, "You look... enamored. Had a good evening?"

Kayla's eyes narrow, "Don't play dumb. I bet you're just dying to weave a story about it."

Their grin remained playful, humming dramatically as if deep in thought, "Perhaps if you tell me all about it, I won't have to... fabricate any details."

Kayla lets out a humorous scoff, shaking her head, "You're horrible."

"Yes, that was what my mother called me. Don't abuse it."

The laugh that bubbles out of Kayla coincides with the screech of an approaching ikran. The sound makes Kayla pause and look up to the sky in order to discover which ikran. She only had to briefly catch the color to know the banshee was Neytiri's bonded, and a small wedge of dread made its home in Kayla's chest.

Neytiri lands her ikran gracefully, several yards away from any Metkayina as they go about the pools of the atoll wall. The Na'vi woman looks around before her eyes land on her intended target. Kayla half expected her sister-in-law to bristle at the sight of her, but she felt a small bit of genuine confusion when all she saw was a woman who was trying to appear small and guarded. If Kayla wanted to verbally taunt, she would've pointed out to Neytiri that she almost looked guilty. The two women stare at each other for some time before Neytiri takes a deep breath and starts slowly walking forward, her face pinched with dread at the idea of the long-awaited conversation she was no doubt forcing herself to partake in.

Kayla takes her own deep breath and then motions Rutxa to wait here before drifting over to meet Neytiri halfway. While it felt as though they walked forever to reach each other, both women found themselves standing right in front of one another only seconds later, neither saying a word while their eyes never fully meeting, both hesitant to say anything at first due to their ongoing impasse.

Neytiri looks Kayla up and down before she swallows her pride, both visibly and internally as she opens her mouth, "Your clothes. They are lovely."

The Sully sister's eyes dart off to the side, her words are stiff but courteous, "Thank you."

"Did the tsahik make it?"

The mention of Ronal made Kayla's ears twitch, "What gave it away?"

"It would explain why she asked me about making a bow for Spider. And--" she takes a small whiff of the air around her mate's sister, "You smell like her. Tonowari, too."

"... I see. Don't tell Jake."

She raised a hairless brow at the other woman, "I will not need to. He will smell it."

Kayla pointedly doesn't blink, finally staring directly into Neytiri's eyes with a stern expression, "Which is why I am avoiding him at the moment."

Neytiri quietly observes Kayla, yellow eyes piercing into one another's gaze, trying to sniff out each other's thoughts. The Omatikaya woman is wracked with bafflement. It is a beautiful thing for one to finally find their mate, or, in this case, mates. It should never be something to be ashamed of, as newly mated pairs often run to their families to excitedly share the news. The fact that Kayla would rather hide and avoid Jake baffles Neytiri. She wanted to hiss and scold both of the former sawtute for what was clearly a spat between siblings, along with a dash of pride, but at this time and place, she knew Kayla wouldn't accept nor appreciate her scolding.

Still, it bothered the Na'vi woman. Neytiri knew the two siblings had a lot of conflict between them, but to go as far as to not share such wonderful news with each other? Neytiri would give anything to be in Kayla's position. She would've given anything to be able to excitedly share life updates with her own sister once more. Sylwanin used to love hearing how Neytiri's day went before bed, even though Neytiri wasn't in turn thrilled to hear about what her sister and Tsu'tey would get up to in the woods. Then again, Neytiri was the only person her sister trusted with that information, and it shattered Neytiri's heart to think how she had taken that for granted. She will never make that same mistake again, and any secrets Sylwanin entrusted to her will die with Neytiri.

Hence why she couldn't bring herself to deny Kayla when the other woman was clearly trying to tell her not to share her secrets with Jake. Neytiri exhaled through her nose and nodded in defeat, "I will not breathe a word."

Kayla stiffly nodded and briefly looked away, peering over her shoulder to see if Rutxa was still waiting for her. Neytiri's conflict was easily undetected, watching Kayla when the avatar wasn't looking with a pained expression in her eyes. Everything that had come between the two women lately was pounding against Neytiri's skull, begging her to say something, to make things right, to finally confess her sins out loud. It has been plaguing her ever since the boy-- ever since Spider confronted her about her distaste and mistreatment toward him. Ever since he made her stand in the eyes of her inner demons, her hidden thoughts no longer feel as hidden as they used to be and she's been struggling to accept everything he said was true.

'Denial is a river in Egypt.' It's a phrase she's not familiar with, but it's something she remembered Grace used to say when Neytiri was a child. When the scientist explained what it meant, somehow it threaded its way into Neytiri's head, and she had yet to forget about it. No one could deny Neytiri's grief after everything she's been through, but neither could anyone deny how unfair she had been to Spider his whole life. Despite knowing how innocent he was, Neytiri refused to See him. Despite eventually accepting Jake and loving him for who he is, she couldn't do the same for Spider, and despite knowing how that hurt the child, she didn't care. Or at least-- not at the time. The fact that she didn't care for a child and his feelings was something she came to terms with long ago, but staring Kayla in the face and simply stating she wasn't Spider's mother haunted Neytiri in her sleep.

The expression Kayla gave terrified Neytiri, guilt riddled her mind and heart. She didn't originally care how her words might hurt Spider, but the guilt she felt when her words affected Kayla felt like she took an arrow through the stomach. It only got worse when Neytiri took the time to look around and see everyone else's reactions. Those who mattered most to her, her husband and her children, all had looked at her as though they didn't recognize her. They looked at her as if she was some sort of monster. After spending time to herself, replaying her words to Spider and everyone's faces, Neytiri finally admitted to herself that they were right. She was a monster. She might not be like Quaritch, but she shouldn't go around and pretend she was better than him, especially after they both held a child at knifepoint for the sake of another.

Neytiri had looked down at her reflection in the water that same day -the day Spider called her out- and suddenly realized she no longer recognized herself. Even though there were things no one could blame her for, there were still moments in her life where Neytiri knew she could've done better. Yes, she let her children play with Spider, but she never once acknowledged him. She didn't have to claim him as hers, but she could've at least made the boy feel welcome. She could've invited him to a family dinner at least once, or given a comment or two on how to properly hold a bow when she caught him trying to teach himself.

So many instances flash over Neytiri's eyes, instances where she could have shown kindness or care to a little orphaned boy who had done nothing but admire her family and love her children with every fiber of his little being. But she didn't. And when she thought back to the young woman she used to be... before Hometree and before her father... before Tsu'tey and Sylwanin... that young woman would have shown such kindness to Spider. By Eywa, that young woman might have even grown to love him as she had grown to love Jake.

Regret will forever be her friend as Neytiri finally comes to accept that she was wrong. Feeling a little more courageous with Kayla's eyes no longer on her, Neytiri spoke up once more, albeit a little more softly, and with the most sincere regret, "I am sorry."

Unaware of Neytiri's internal conflict, Kayla's eyes return to hers, squinting with disapproval, "It's not me you should be apologizing to."

Neytiri pressed her eyes shut for a moment, the guilt bleeding into her expression as her ears pinned back against her skull, "I am sorry to you as well. I had threatened your son. I almost killed him in front of you."

"He's n--" Kayla's words caught in her throat, then she swallowed them down and looked away again, trying to hide the small pain in her voice, "Thank you."

Neytiri nods, voice a little more sure, "I would not be any better than the monster who took my son away from me if I took yours."

Kayla wanted to be firm and agree, but her tongue swelled in her mouth, with something itching at the back of her mind that told her not to sound petty and vindictive. A question kept nagging at her, the same question Kiri once asked her. What would she have done if she was in Neytiri's place that night? It was a scenario she couldn't imagine in her head, even if she could imagine a lot.

She hesitates, her posture relaxing and less guarded as she softly asks, "Can... can you explain it to me? So that I can try to understand?"

A visible wince flashed over Neytiri's expression, her eyes wide with distress in response to Kayla's question. Neytiri wasn't sure she could describe what she felt... not without breaking down, that is. Then again, it had been the first time anyone had asked her how she felt instead of just assuming and giving her time to herself. She didn't want that anymore. She's had plenty of time to herself, and a part of her was angry at everyone who continued to give her a wide berth. Solitude was something she no longer needed, and she wanted everyone to stop treating her like she was going to break.

Perhaps talking about it was something Neytiri needed just as much as Kayla in order to feel some sort of comfort. The idea makes her take a deep breath and slowly answer, "It is not the same as losing a parent, in my eyes. I lost my father, and even though I miss him every day, we are told that our parents will join Eywa before us and that they will be waiting for us there when we eventually do the same. For a child... it's different. A parent should always go before their child. That should always be the way of things... and that was stolen from me. You might not know this, but you should be prepared for when Ronal has her child. When we are born, the first tsaheylu is with our mother. To form that strong and emotional bond. To lose the first child I ever bonded with--"

Kayla's tail and ears lower, blinking rapidly to contain hidden pain, her imagination running wild with everything Neytiri had described. It helped that Neytiri was trying to explain it... but Kayla couldn't imagine how it must feel for a grieving mother to say all of this out loud.

Neytiri sucks in a sharp, wheezing breath, but it wavers and her lips begin to quiver. Her eyes grow wet with tears as her hand reaches up to try and gently claw at her chest, visibly and verbally shaking, "The pain for my father and even my sister do not compare... I feel as though I have a gaping wound in my chest that will not stop bleeding. It's always there, ever flowing, and I cannot take a breath without remembering it. My baby who I had kept safe inside me for so long... suddenly ripped from my arms before he could find love... or have a family... or be the olo'eyktan he was always meant to be... I had always wanted to see him as a father, and now I will never have that."

Saying it out loud felt as though she was living Neteyam's death all over again. Fresh tears spilled down Neytiri's beautiful face, carving a familiar path down her cheeks as a sob interrupted her explanation. Her chest squeezed painfully, and her sobs only got worse as Kayla suddenly reached out and pulled her into a tight embrace, purposely hiding Neytiri's face as the grieving mother continued to cry her heart out, wishing she could just be numb. Neytiri didn't miss the way Kayla buried her own wet face to hide from the world, nuzzled into Neytiri's shoulder. The female Na'vi continued to sob, and even though the grief was still too fresh, it helped to have finally put it all into words. It helped to know that someone was trying to understand her when she felt as though everyone else could only pity her.

"I'm sorry..." Kayla whispered as Neytiri's cries began to subside, "I could never imagine what that feels like."

Neytiri didn't miss how her shoulder felt wet where Kayla's face lay, and something inside the Na'vi woman snapped into place. She didn't want Kayla to imagine. She didn't even want Kayla to understand because that would mean having her sister-in-law go through the same agony she went through. Neytiri didn't want anyone to go through the loss of a child, let alone her husband's dear sister. The thought of having Kayla go through pain similar to hers nearly brought Neytiri to anger. Determined and dry of her tears, Neytiri pulled away, lifting her hands to rest gently on Kayla's shoulders, fixing her with a sharp eye.

"I do not want you to ever experience this pain. I do not want you to end up like me, ma tsmuke."

Kayla shook her head, "There's nothing that says it's wrong to end up like you. You're a good woman and a good mother. You're fiercely protective of your children. Any mother would thrive if they were even remotely like you," watching doubt and pain creep back up Neytiri's face drives Kayla to quickly add, "And I was wrong if I ever suggested otherwise. I never blamed you for protecting your children, Neytiri."

"I know," the Na'vi woman whispers, eyes briefly lowering to the ground in shame, "But I should have never belittled you for protecting yours."

The two women stand in silence once more, now filled with understanding as two mothers protecting their young. With her newfound determination, Neytiri raises her head high, straightens her posture, and stiffly nods, "If you'll allow me, I will go apologize to the boy."

Kayla is silent for the moment, carefully watching Neytiri before slowly replying, "... I better not hear that you hurt him again."

"You won't."

And with that, both women nod and part ways. Neytiri moves back in the direction of her ikran while Kayla stands still and watches her leave. Wiping the remaining tear tracks on her face as she walked, a thought crossed Neytiri's mind, making her pause in her tracks. A brief memory of Sylwanin flashes through her mind, happy and glowing as she tells Neytiri that Tsu'tey had begun courting her. It was a small pain in her heart at the memory, a small pinprick of a needle, faint but still causing her heart to bleed at the thought of her sister. Swiftly turning back around, Neytiri briefly sees Sylwanin in the flesh, standing there with a beaming smile before the facade fades, and reverts back to Makayla, whose head was tilted while quizzically watching Neytiri.

Neytiri's breath stuttered for a moment before the words began to tumble from her mouth, "For what it is worth, ma tsmuke, I am happy for you. If Ronal or Tonowari or either of them hurt you, I will kill them for you."

The words briefly stun Kayla, eyes wide and jaw open with shock, before the spell breaks and she finds herself laughing. The needle in Neytiri's heart fades, along with the pain of her sister's memory. Neytiri found herself smiling as well, proud that she pulled such a reaction from her new sister.

~~~~~~~~~

As promised, Spider came home before dinner, and Kayla looked up from cleaning her AR with a smile, "Hey, kiddo."

"Do you have to do that a lot?" Spider tilts his head down at the weapon with curiosity, then briefly looks back at his charge, "Will it not work otherwise?"

Kayla rolls her lips, unsure of how to explain to a child who prefers the life of a Na'vi compared to humans. She shakes her head, "It could jam, for one. I have to clean it for the same reason you have to eat. It needs to function."

Spider nods and says nothing else, which sounds off a dozen other bells in Kayla's head, quick to understand that his questions and attempt at small talk usually meant something else was going on and he was deflecting. She knows that behavior all too well. She sets the weapon aside and gives all her attention to the teen, knowingly smirking at him, "What's up?"

His eyes immediately dart away, arms folding in around him as if to protect what little there was left to hide. He looked embarrassed, ashamed he had been caught as he mumbled under his breath, "Neytiri apologized."

Her expression melts into something solemn and sincere, nodding once, "I know."

"Did you make her?" He asked with suspicion in his gaze.

"No, but she asked me if she could."

"How come?"

Kayla shrugged, feigning innocence as she tried to play nonchalantly, "I'm guessing she was under the impression I didn't want her anywhere near you."

He stared at her for a while, unconvinced, "Right."

Then he moved on to the next topic, "'You gonna break your link tonight?"

Kayla groaned quietly, playfully rolling her eyes up at the ceiling of the marui, "Yeah. Norm radioed earlier to pester me, and I figured I'd see how everyone was doing. 'You need me to tell him anything?"

"My spares' got plenty of battery. I'll be good for a while. Tell everyone I said hi."

"You got it."

~~~~~~~~~

She wakes in the link bay with a queasy stomach and a splitting headache.

It wasn't nearly as bad as the last time she broke her link, but the moment the blinding lights of the biolab flashed in Kayla's face as the lid of the gurney was lifted, she felt her stomach turn and she had to bite the inside of her cheek.

Sitting up with a stifled groan, Kayla holds her head in her hand, trying to stop the bright room from spinning. Norm, dutifully standing beside her with his arms crossed, decided not to beat around the bush, even in her weakened state,

"You can't keep doing this, ya know. Staying back there for long periods of time is going to kill your body here, one day at a time. It's safe to say you've reached the limit of human-avatar links."

"Maybe that's a good thing, Norm," Kayla muttered, able to roll her shoulders back and sit up straight without feeling dizzy, "With data like that, the RDA won't be able to get the go-ahead with building avatars for civilians. This can keep them at bay for a while."

"But it's not a good thing for you, Kayla."

"I know. I just..." she tried waving it off, avoiding Norm's narrowed gaze like a child being scolded, "I just need a little more time."

Norm scoffed, unimpressed, "You're stubborn. Just like your brother."

When that doesn't pull a reaction out of her, Spellman decides to break more bad news, "There's more. Scouts have reported seeing a rogue ikran dressed in military gear flying through the mountains, and it's pretty close to our base. They've confirmed the rider to be Colonel Miles Quaritch."

Clouded eyes flick briefly to Norm, widened with shock before Kayla looks away again, exhaling her opinion, "Fuck."

"I thought maybe you could tell Jake for me when you get back."

Kayla is silent for a few moments before she replies, "No. No, let's not tell him."

"What?" Norm rustled.

"If we tell Jake, he'll just wanna come back and track Quaritch down. Maybe that's what Quaritch wants. Right now, Jake needs to be with his family instead of looking for revenge."

Kayla's eyes return to her friend's, wide and pleading, "Please, Norm. Please don't tell him."

They have a silent stand-off, the occasional sound of machinery breaking said silence. Eventually, Norm's posture sinks in defeat, making him look smaller and older than he actually is, "... Fine."

"Swear it."

"I swear it... unless he asks me."

Kayla scoffed, rolling her eyes, "Fine."

"... When you say you need more time, I meant when I said you're just like your brother."

She silently watched him with confusion but didn't verbally ask what he meant, waiting for him to elaborate. Norm looks off to a far wall, recounting very distant memories he hadn't thought of in years, "He was also running out of time, and he was getting desperate. He said he needed more time; time to see Neytiri again."

When Norm looked back at Kayla, he noticed she was purposely keeping her own gaze glued to the floor, her long matted hair covering most of her face, mumbling to a point where he struggled to hear her, "It's not like that this time."

"You're lying." Norm immediately retorts, taking a gamble on his theory when Kayla doesn't immediately try to defend herself. They both knew she was lying only to herself, and Norm didn't hesitate to point it out, "Something's changed."

Seeing no point in lying or keeping it secret, Kayla sighs, "Tonowari and Ronal have officially asked to court me."

Norm's eyes widen, "And...?"

"I agreed but asked to wait on the rest of it until I'm officially one of the People."

"Smart..." He couldn't help it. He needed to lighten the mood and feel a little smug. Norm deserved that much as a boastful smile spread across his face, "Also 'I told you so.'"

Kayla scowls, her eyes finally looking up at him to express how stolid she felt, "Dick."

He snorts, unaffected, finally moving to sit down next to her on the gurney, "So... do they know about... you know... the fact you can't have kids?"

Her posture visibly stiffened, "It didn't come up, no."

"That's probably something you need to discuss with them, Kayla, and soon."

"I know."

His hand reaches out to lightly tap her knee, "I am not saying that it'll be a deal-breaker for them. I don't think they'll care, to be honest. But you don't keep secrets from the people you love."

"Hey," she nudged him back, trying to force a teasing smile on her face, "Why do you think I'm telling you all this?"

"How sweet," Norm scoffs goodnaturedly, "But that's just you trying to deflect."

~~~~~~~~~

It was strange being able to sleep in the shack again, and even more strange to be the only occupant. Kayla looked around the tiny man-made space, eyes flicking to her bunk, the desk, the small kitchenette, and then the vacant wheelchair she never had the heart to throw out when she first arrived at High Camp. It now lay folded up and leaning against the corner wall, former white letters that spelled 'Sully' now unrecognizable. A fond smile graced her lips when she thought back to the three weeks she and Spider stayed here and the teenager struggled to figure out how to balance on the accessible chair as it rocked on its back wheels. The attempt ended with him falling and rolling backward and leaving Kayla in a fit of uncontrollable laughter that he eventually joined.

The thought of her boy made her chest squeeze uncomfortably for a moment, the feeling of loneliness suddenly very apparent in this small shack. How strange that she was sitting in a place she had once tried to call home, but now she felt homesick for an island that was oceans away, or in her case, one neural link away. Realistically, she could go lay down in a link bay and wake up in her marui, awaken to Spider's nivi��swinging slowly just off to the side of hers as he sleeps. Kayla shook her head and smiled to herself, amused at the idea of walking to the link bay only to be intercepted by either Norm or Max, both men who had adamantly told her not to link back until it was early morning in Awa'atlu so both her human and avatar form could receive separate reprieve.

As much as she would like to entertain the idea of rest, the lingering silence in her shack made it feel as though the walls were closing in around her. Kayla knew she wouldn't be able to sleep if she were alone, so she kept herself busy instead, starting with her overgrown hair.

Looking into the mirror that night, a small sense of normalcy returned when she had managed to cut her hair to the same short length she had when she first arrived on Pandora. While her reflection didn't initially scare her anymore without any matted long hair or sunken eyes, Kayla still had a hard time recognizing the woman in the mirror without blue skin or a piercing yellow gaze. It felt wrong and her skin prickled and itched with this revelation. A twisted part inside of her wanted to try and scratch her face off until she recognized it, but she refrained from doing so, knowing how delusional it sounded. It felt as though she was living in someone else's body and she needed to return to hers despite the logical voice in her head reminding her that she was born in this body, as a human, not a Na'vi, and she was foolish to believe otherwise.

The unrealistic voice in her head argued that there was nothing wrong with being a little foolish.

~~~~~~~~~

Waking in her avatar gave Kayla a wave of relief, sitting up in her hammock and stretching as if she had never left. The worries of the night before are immediately forgotten as she and Spider venture out of the home to search for friends and family.

The three reef children Spider has been associating himself with were the first of the day to greet them, and it was clear that the silent news of the Metkayina's clan leaders' courtship was not lost to their children. Kayla was surprised when Tsireya ran up and hugged the older woman's waist, the girl giddy and unable to contain her bright smile. Spider tilts his head curiously at the interaction but otherwise says nothing.

Kayla took a peek at the girl's brother and saw a slightly different story. Ao'nung was glaring, but not at Kayla or Spider. Ao'nung was scowling at Rotxo, the latter of whom looked gobsmacked while staring up at Kayla, unable to hide his shock even as he turned to his best friend to see his reaction. Ao'nung only scoffed and shoved Rotxo's surprised face away with one hand, mumbling to Spider that they should get a move on.

"Where are we going?" Spider asked curiously.

"Father wanted to show you how to weave our fishing baskets."

His play on words wasn't lost to the group, certainly not to Kayla and Spider. The adult avatar managed to hold back the wince at the thought of Spider silently noting how Ao'nung didn't say 'my father', but did her best to pretend she didn't even notice. Instead, Kayla decided to follow Ao'nung and Spider to the chieftain's marui, while Tsireya and Rotxo had split up to do some chores, promising to catch up with the other reef and Sully kids later.

Tonowari greeted them as they entered, both he and Kayla sharing a secret smile as she crouched down beside him. Having many obligations around the village yesterday, the olo'eyktan had only been able to see Kayla from a distance and had yet to get a better look at how she appeared in her new top apart from what Ronal had described to him. Kayla could tell how much he enjoyed seeing her wearing his courting gift by the way his large hand grazed over her skin, encompassing her back whenever both Ao'nung and Spider were occupied with the task he had given them.

The two teenagers were busy weaving large pieces of what would eventually become a fishing basket between them, taking up a lot of floor space with the amount of dry grass, seaweed, and pliant wood being used to fashion and form such a large item. Tonowari was mostly instructing Spider on how to do it since Ao'nung was already skilled in basket weaving, but the chief's son was also impatient and this served as a way to tame such impulse. The olo'eyktan works effortlessly alongside them, his words gentle yet stern,

"Work together, like brothers. You are building a house. You're building your village. You're building a family."

Kayla restrains her smile, despite how warm her chest felt while watching the three of them work together in weaving. She allowed herself to play at the idea of this image being hers one day without trying to get her hopes up. As she watches Tonowari instruct Ao'nung and Spider to take turns weaving their basket pieces together, she gives into the desire to call them 'my boys'... but only in her head.

~~~~~~~~~

Flashing lights, spinning faster and faster while his eyes are forced wide open to watch, feeling as though something sharp was penetrating his skull, embedding itself into his memories...

His screams go unheard this time, and no one comes to stop the machine, not even Quaritch, as the blood drips from his nose, bare skin cold against metal. Spider feels as though his head is going to explode--

Sitting up in his nivi, Spider finds himself gasping for air while his eyes try to get accustomed to darkness... no flashing lights in sight. His hammock gently swings with him as he moves, his mind taking an embarrassingly long time to remember where he was. Spider takes a bunch of large, greedy gulps of air, his breathing mask hissing in tandem, while he looks around the marui to remember he isn't alone.

Kayla was sitting up in her hammock and carefully watching him. Spider's mind briefly felt shame for being responsible for waking her, but he was too busy breathing to form an apology. It's not like she would accept it anyway. The two of them have already spent countless nights waking up due to Spider's nightmares, and Kayla has been adamant in assuring him that he wasn't at fault for any of it. Once she knows Spider is aware of her presence, Kayla silently stands up and moves over to the kid, standing over his nivi as he's sitting up, starting to relax.

When trying to talk, his throat felt raw and his voice only added to it, "... Hey."

"Hey," Kayla bravely reaches out to cup the back of his head, her hand a gentle, warm weight that feels a lot better than a cold, metal slab, "Was it the scanner again?"

He nods, but the moment Kayla goes to step away, something inside him panics. It felt stupid and childish, but Spider couldn't stop the impulse that made his arms move around Kayla's torso and pull her into a tight hug, pressing his mask up against her ribs as his body started to uncontrollably shake.

Kayla froze, arms raised in the air with hesitancy, blinking multiple times to ensure she was still wide awake and not just imagining this. The teenager only burrows further into her as if she had just found him lost in a shopping mall. For several seconds, she didn't even dare to breathe so as not to spook him before she eventually began to relax and gently settle her large arms around his shoulders, her voice softer than before,

"Alright... it's alright, Spider. You're safe now. What do you need?"

"Just," Spider huffed, feeling incredibly stupid yet distressed at the same time. He knows he shouldn't be acting so small and meek, but the idea of going back to sleep terrified him, "Talk. About anything."

The marui is filled with silence as Kayla wracks her brain to come up with things to say, and then decides that now might as well be as good of a time as any, especially if it meant helping distract Spider from his nightmares, "... Ronal and Tonowari have asked me to be their mate."

Initially, he's quiet while digesting the news, but he's honestly not surprised. He thinks back to the way both clan leaders and even their children had been treating him differently today and the day before. It explains the certain looks Spider has seen other Metkayina give Kayla and her new attire... and it would possibly explain Neytiri's sudden apology to him.

Instead of pointing all of these signs out to his guardian, Spider just snorts in his mask and keeps his arms around her waist, "I told you so."

"Shut up," Kayla huffed under her breath, but even he could tell there was no heat behind it, especially since her arms only tightened around him, "I'm not taking an 'I told you so' remark from a sixteen-year-old, especially since I already got that from Norm. I'm dense, okay?"

Spider laughed and let the silence linger for a minute before reopening his mouth, "... So? Did you accept?"

"Not entirely. I told them I wanted to wait until after my Iknimaya is complete."

"Makes sense. That's usually the way it goes. Courting sometimes lasts years for the Na'vi, so it's not entirely something they wouldn't be used to. You did the right thing."

Kayla's tail leisurely sways behind her, the tone in her voice sounding hopeful, "You think so?"

He closes his eyes for a moment, allowing himself to feel like a child for once, to be held and comforted before he answers quietly, "Yeah. I do."

~~~~~~~~~

While it was an honest answer, there were slightly different intentions behind it. Spider was impressed by the way Kayla handled her courtship, and any respectable Na'vi would approve of her mature decision to wait. However, Spider now felt as though he was racing against the clock, and at least this way, he still had some time to prove himself useful.

Now that he was proven right that Ronal and Tonowari did, in fact, wish to mate with Kayla, Spider felt the need to work harder and become a more willing and helpful individual. He did what he could without the ability to connect with a tswin and tried to always give a helping hand whenever and wherever. Offering help wasn't hard, especially if he offered it to Tsireya since she always had something for him to do, but some Na'vi still have a hard time accepting Spider's help for... obvious reasons.

But even if the Metkayina didn't want his help, the human teen wasn't just going to lie down in defeat. He found many ways of helping around the village, either by his friends' side or himself, now that everyone wasn't as worried about leaving him alone. Other than to help with chores, Spider barely spent time with his friends outside of work, too busy trying to keep himself relevant. He wanted-- no, needed to pull his weight, too ashamed of the idea of being useless to the point he would get left behind again. As silly as he felt for still having such fears... it was still warranted. He wanted to give the Metkayina a chance to trust him and consider him a viable part of this village so they wouldn't make him leave. As much as he missed the Forest, he couldn't bear the thought of going back alone. So if his friends and his... guardian were staying here, then so was he, and he was determined to prove that he deserved to stay here.

These thoughts plagued him almost every waking moment and thus distracted him from the world around him. While Spider was busy gutting and cleaning some fish Lo'ak had caught, he was approached by the very clan leaders he sought to impress, but hadn't noticed their presence until they spoke,

"Hello, Spider."

Spider's posture straightens instinctively in response to Tonowari's strong voice. Looking to his right, the teenager glanced up and met eyes with the olo'eyktan, standing tall beside his mate and greeting the boy with a pleasant smile. Spider stood up and appropriately greeted the clan leaders with a gesture of his hand and a small, almost sheepish smile, "Hello."

"Is your bow of any use?"

It was difficult to see behind the mask, but Tonowari could've sworn Spider's eyes brightened at the mention of his bow, "It's solid and nicely made. Thanks again."

"Of course."

Spider briefly glanced at the silent Ronal, and he felt as though he imagined the smile on the tsahik's face and quickly looked away to pretend he didn't see it, "Uh... is there anything I can do for you two?"

While Ronal may or may not have been smiling, Spider dared to describe Ronal's tone as sounding almost light when she spoke, "There might be."

Tonowari chuckled at her being vague and decided to specify for the boy who looked between the two of them with such confusion, "We came to ask for your blessing."

The boy tilts his head, "My... blessing?"

"To court your guardian, Makayla te Suli."

Spider appeared uneasy by their motive, crossing his arms over his chest while the confusion was still evident, "Why are you asking me? Shouldn't you be asking Jake?"

Ronal snorts lightheartedly, "Makayla has been vocal about who we should and shouldn't be asking for permission. It's not her brother's approval she wants, it's yours."

He stood there, motionless, trying to figure out the ever-growing puzzle in his head that was made in Kayla's image. He didn't know why she would tell both of her future mates to seek him out over Jake, someone who was related to her by blood, despite their differences. While Spider understood that Makayla felt responsible for him, that didn't mean he was suddenly entitled to any life-changing decisions she had to make. It's not like her decision to join Ronal and Tonowari's family would affect Spider... much.

The idea of being left in an empty marui came to mind, but he quickly stomped the image down, glancing off toward the ocean as he finally gave the two clan leaders his answer, "Then... yeah, I guess it's fine."

~~~~~~~~~

They must have told Kayla his answer, because once she returned home, Spider was met with a cautious look in her eyes,

"And you're really okay with this?" She asked without even greeting him.

Knowing what she was talking about without even asking, Spider only looked at her with the same confusion he had given Ronal and Tonowari, "Yeah?"

"Kid, I'm not doing anything that's going to make you uncomfortable."

Guilt ate away at his stomach, his sole purpose of trying to remain useful to the Metkayina still at the forefront of his mind. He didn't want Kayla to hold herself back for the sake of his comfort. That would only make him a burden and that was the last thing he wanted. He needed to prove that he didn't need her should the day come when she moved into the chieftain's marui and he was left behind.

Trying to keep his expression neutral, Spider tried to explain this to her without having to go into detail about his insecurities, "They're going to be your family someday, not mine."

Realization dawns on Kayla as her eyes widen, "Is that what you want?" When he doesn't answer, keeping his head lowered, Kayla tries a different approach when she feels as though she was onto something, "'Cause personally, I'd rather have you with me on this. I go where you go, kiddo and anyone who gets with me will have to deal with that."

Stunned, he looked up at her with disbelief, unable to help how accusatory his voice sounded, "Why? Why do you care so much?"

There it is. A question that should've been asked a long time ago, but Spider had always been afraid to ask, so confident that he wouldn't like the answer. As for Kayla, she had always been afraid of the day he'd finally ask her because she wasn't sure if she would be able to say the right thing or even give an honest answer. Half the time, she knew she was winging it when it came to taking care of Spider, but... isn't that what most people have been telling her parenting is all about? As much as she wished to continue being stubborn about it or outright refuse it, Kayla had to admit to herself that even if she would never be Spider's mother, she was the closest thing he had to a parental figure. And... she knew, deep down, that's what she wanted but she had been putting her own wants aside if it meant that's not what Spider wanted.

But clearly, he wanted to make sense as to why she wanted him to be comfortable with their new clan leaders, along with everything that came with them, so finally, Kayla took a deep breath and put it all out on the table, "Because you're a kid, Spider, and you deserve a family. I'm asking you if I can officially be your family. And who knows, maybe one day Ronal, Tonowari, and their kids could be your family."

Spider sucked in a sharp breath of air without realizing it, the soft hiss of his mask filling the marui. His nerves made him want to instinctually laugh it off like she was joking, but he didn't picture Kayla to be the kind of person who joked about such things, especially when he was involved. Replaying her words in his head, he almost believed he imagined it; like it was muffled in the back of his mind because that's what he wanted to hear her say... and yet the words had matched up with her mouth as she spoke... had he imagined it?

There was a small, nasty voice in the back of his head telling him that of course, he imagined it because why in her right mind would Kayla want to be his family? He's nothing but trouble and Kayla was being courted by the leaders of the Metkayina, two respected individuals whose image would surely be ruined by Spider's very presence.

Another small, more kind voice in his head told Spider that Kayla was right and that he deserved to have a family. Sure, it might not be the family he was born into or the family he had wanted practically his whole life, but it could be his, the family he actually needed. He thought of Ao'nung and Tsireya, two Na'vi who had become such unlikely friends... and yet they could be more? Ronal and Tonowari, who have been decent to him, could potentially be more?

Of course, there's also Kayla, the female avatar who looked unsure as she stood before Spider, staring down at him with fear as if she had said the wrong thing. He couldn't possibly hope that this was her intention, and so he swallowed the dryness in his throat before hesitantly replying,

"So... you're not asking if I'm comfortable about this for... other reasons?"

She frowned, "What other reasons?"

"I don't know..." he shrugged and found himself looking away, sheepish to admit it, "I thought you were asking me all this to make sure I would be okay with getting left alone again when you inevitably go to be with them."

He didn't see the way Kayla's eyes briefly widen in horror before she cursed under her breath, crouching down beside him while bravely placing a hand on his shoulder to gain his attention, "Shit, Spider-- I'm sorry. I can see why that looked bad. No, I'm not leaving you alone just because I intend on seeing someone. I take my responsibilities very seriously, thank you very much."

Ah, yes. Responsibilty. That's who he was to Kayla. It was a good reminder for Spider not to get his hopes up, a reminder that Kayla was a parental figure, but she could never be more than that. He didn't dare glance over at the bookshelf where his mother's picture was displayed, not wanting Kayla to misinterpret anything.

"... Okay."

Kayla's eyebrows furrow, trying not to appear hopeful, "Okay?"

He nods, "Okay."

Kayla smiled then, more confidently and unaware of Spider's hidden thoughts, but he smiled back, regardless. She squeezed his shoulder once more before pulling away, humming with a small, playful tone in her voice as she mentioned, "You know, eventually we'll have to move in with them, right? Are you comfortable with that? You know that families usually pile together at night."

Spider's face slowly begins to contort with uncertainty, "... You and I aren't used to that."

"Nope. We're not."

Nervously, he smiles, "Shit. Is that a dealbreaker?"

The laughter Kayla let out was cheerful and full of life. It was also contagious as Spider found himself laughing as well, and despite his doubt, there was a small bit of weight that had to been lifted from his shoulders. Despite being unsure of what the future holds for him... at the very least, there was going to be someone to keep him safe. Whether or not Kayla could be his family she mentioned, there was also the uncertainty of whether or not the clan leaders and their children would think the same. Either way, his acceptance clearly made Kayla happy, and he didn't want to ruin that with his insecurities.

~~~~~~~~~

If there's one thing Jake can confidently say about his sister, it's that if she wants him to know something, she'll tell him.

It was obvious to everyone that Kayla was not afraid to tell Jake whatever she was thinking. She's not afraid to speak her mind to him, no matter how brutal, and while there are times that Jake secretly appreciates it, lately it's been disheartening due to recent... obvious incidents.

So, when Kayla avoided him for two days, Toruk Makto enjoyed the peace and quiet, but Neytiri gave him a knowing expression that told him he wasn't being very true to himself in those moments. He eventually had to admit to himself that the silence was getting to him and he would've preferred his little sister yelling at him than straight up avoiding his presence. He eventually gave in and sought her out on the third day.

He finds his sister in her marui with Spider that morning, rolling up their separate nivi and getting prepared for the day ahead. Jake watches them for a moment, still unsure of how to address them if neither was going to admit they were mother and son, before announcing his presence. Kayla, once laid back and content, ready to face the day, now looked tense and wary at the sound of her brother's voice. Jake tried not to let it bother him, keeping his expression neutral as he offered to assist Kayla with any chores she had.

She agreed, with reluctance, and moved to meet him in the doorway. Jake did his best to keep his face impassive, but he struggled when Kayla walked close enough to the point he could catch a whiff of her scent. It was by no means her own, or the one Jake had affiliated as his sister whenever she was near. It smelled familiar, but it wasn't Kayla's and while it was faint, it was definitely new. It bothered him for a moment as both he and Kayla walked out of the marui together,his brain trying to conjure where he had smelled that particular scent before. While Jake wanted to mention it, he wisely doesn't say a word for many reasons. The whole scent debacle was a Na'vi thing and he could understand if Kayla wasn't entirely comfortable about the concept, and she may not understand it fully herself.

And like before, he knows that if there's something Kayla wants him to know, she'll tell him.

Kayla had asked Jake to help her with a canoe she's been wanting to make for a while now, and so together they conjured up the necessary supplies and started hauling it all back to her pod. She trailed behind Jake, silent for the most part, and the tension in the air was palpable, almost worse than the silent treatment she had been giving her brother for a few days. Jake knew something was right on the tip of her tongue, practically hearing the gears in her head without even needing to see her face as he walked in front of her. It was the same, intense silence he remembered experiencing when she was younger, right before she came out to her brothers. Tommy, ever the nurturing sibling, was worried for Kayla and had gently told her that if there was something she'd like to get off her chest, he and Jake would always hear her out, and no matter what, they would always be there for her.

Jake felt his chest squeeze painfully at the memory, so he was glad to distract himself from it when Kayla's voice suddenly spoke up from behind him,

"Jake."

He continued to walk towards her home as it drew near, ear tilted back in her direction, over his shoulder, "Hm?"

"There's something I got to tell you--"

She paused, and before Jake could ask her to elaborate, a soft thud from behind him gently rattled the woven pathway beneath his feet, followed by the sound of a large splash. Jake frowned and turned back around, only for his sister to no longer be standing there. In her place, was the basket of supplies she had been carrying, the contents spilled across the walkway and even rolling into the water below, the soft plopping sound of small items crashing into the water filling the air while Kayla was nowhere to be seen.

Something heavy falls in Jake's gut, as his ears point up and dance around in alertness. He reacts fast by quickly setting down his items and sprinting to the edge of the path, looking down into the water.

"Kayla!"

He sees a small shadow, quickly growing smaller as it sinks further into the water. It was the only thing that crossed his mind before diving into the sea.

The loud splash followed by Jake's distressed voice calling out to Makayla grabbed Spider's attention and steps out of the kelku, just in time to see the revered Toruk Makto diving straight into the water, abandoning baskets full of spilled supplies all along the pathway in his panicked rush. Spider's heart plummets in the five seconds Jake was underwater, and when the older man had yet to break the surface, Spider found himself running down the woven path toward the spot Jake had jumped from, even if he didn't believe he could be much help to a large, full-sized Na'vi, fearing the worst.

By the time Spider reached the deserted supplies scattered across the walkway, Jake had finally resurfaced, gasping for air while water spilled into his eyes and ears. The former marine struggled to paddle with just one arm back toward the path walk while trying to keep a fully grown female avatar afloat, her closed eyes doing nothing to help the panic begin to eat away at her brother's chest.

Despite being small, Spider scrambled to help Jake lift Kayla's body out of the water, hooking his arms underneath hers and lifting with all his might with a soft grunt. Jake helped by lifting Kayla's legs out of the water, and once she was lying across the pathway on her back, Jake lifted himself out of the water before frantically crawling over to her, gently shoving Spider out of Kayla's space so he could inspect her for injuries.

Nothing visible appeared to be wrong with her, but Kayla's eyes remained closed and when Jake initially dragged her out of the water, he couldn't help but notice how lifeless her body moved. Or, in a sense, didn't move.

"Hey!" Jake practically yelled in her face, his hand beginning to gently pat her cheek, only for the motion to grow into harsher slaps the longer she refused to open her eyes.

The panic that was beginning to rise up to Jake's throat only added to the stern, angry tone in his voice as he yelled at his sister's face, "Heyheyhey, wake up. Kayla!"

"Kayla?" Spider's voice called out, less afraid of sounding panicked while fear was evident behind his mask when directing his attention to Jake, "What's wrong with her?"

"I don't know..." Jake initially replied before pausing his train of thought, a sinking feeling of familiarity washing over him when he started to analyze Kayla's symptoms and recognize the signs. It had been over a decade... but he'd seen this happen before, and the thought scared him.

"Spider, do you have your flashlight?"

Without asking for an explanation, Spider hands him the flashlight he kept in a small pouch of necessities he had tied around his loincloth.

"There we go..." Jake mutters under his breath almost as if trying to soothe and reassure himself, turning on the flashlight before leaning over Kayla's face. He takes his free hand and forces one of her eyelids to peel back, shining the bright light directly into her eye before moving on to the other one.

Her pupils don't move or even dilate, confirming Jake's growing fear, "Shit. She's not in there."

"What?" Spider croaked, suddenly hating the way his eyes felt warm.

"She's not in there," Jake automatically explained, "Something or someone interrupted her link."

Jake tries catching his breath, willing himself to regain a bit of self-control. He didn't want to assume the worst, but at the very least, Kayla wasn't dead, and her avatar didn't appear to be injured. For all he knew, Kayla had simply woken up hundreds of miles away, among their human allies and the Omatikaya. He'll just have to make a call back to High Camp and they can sort out this small situation. Nothing major...

He kept telling himself that as he bent down and lifted Kayla up into his arms, supporting her back and the crook of her legs while trying to maneuver around Spider, "Hang on-- watch out. Let's get her back to my place."

Spider dutifully follows, bounding down the woven path just to be able to catch up to Jake's long strides, the boy's eyes never leaving Kayla's avatar, "What do we do?"

"Let me try and contact Norm."

The walk back to the Sully marui felt like forever, with Jake trying to stamp down his growing anxiety the longer it took to get back. When they finally arrived, Jake and Spider brought Kayla inside only to find themselves alone, with no one else home. Jake gently lays Kayla down and immediately beelines for his long-range radio, gripping the device harshly as he speaks into it,

"Dirty Falcon, Dirty Falcon, do you read me? This is Devil Dog, over."

Jake releases the button and waits, the pod filled with static and silence. Spider kneels down beside Kayla's head, staring at Jake's radio with a rising, fluttering feeling in his chest that makes chills rise across his skin. As he and Jake continued to sit in silence, the lack of response on Norm's end was palpable.

Jake could hear his own heart racing in his ears as he brought the radio to his mouth once more, "Norm, it's Jake. Are you there? Norm?"

Silence.

"Norm? Norm?"

~~~~~~~~~

He wasn't sure how many times he had tried calling High Camp as minutes turned into hours. Whether it was six or seven attempts, Toruk Makto had begun to inspect the radio to ensure it was even working, not wanting to entertain the thought that something might be wrong on the other end of the communication. Each time he spoke into the radio and then stopped to wait for a response, he couldn't help the glances he'd send over to Spider. Each time, as the silence lingered between each call, the teenager's face only fell further and it made Jake's chest feel like lead. By the time the suns were at the highest peak in the sky, the village stirred with whispers about Makayla te Suli's collapse. As people gradually learned what had happened, Jake found his home being bombarded with not only his wife and children as they raced back to the pod but other Na'vi as well, much to his surprise.

Some of his children's friends were also present. Ao'nung and Tsireya were with Lo'ak when they heard about what happened to Kayla and immediately came running back to the marui with him, concern etched on their young faces. Jake watched with confusion as the reef siblings moved like a well-oiled machine. Ao'nung, as if on instinct, knelt down beside Spider, inspecting Kayla's avatar while Tsireya sternly let Lo'ak know that she was going to fetch her parents.

Jake heard this but didn't register the words until the young girl was already heading out the door, and by then it was already too late to stop her. Lo'ak quickly distracted his father from his racing thoughts when he asked what had happened to his aunt. By the time Jake recounted the events, the rest of the Sullys were speeding into the marui and Tsireya had returned with the clan leaders.

Ronal was like a tidal wave as she bounded into the Sullys' home, a fearsome expression in her eyes that would immediately make any normal man flinch had Jake not been exposed to Grace Augustine's own ferocity,

"And why have you brought her back here instead of to me?"

"Because she's not injured and this has nothing to do with spirituality," Jake found himself saying robotically, instinctively falling into the role of Toruk Makto to help him not acknowledge the hidden anxiety deep in his gut, "Makayla's human form must have woken up and that's why she collapsed here. She's... she's no longer possessing this body."

Tonowari hovers over his mate like a protective shadow as she bends down over Kayla's avatar, the olo'eyktan's eyes hardened with determination to find a solution as he addresses Jake, "Is that normal?"

Jake's ears pin back, eyes unfocused for a moment, "No, it's not. This only happens if someone is forced out of their Na'vi body. I've seen it before."

Ronal grabs Kayla's chin to tilt the avatar's head to look up at her, "Makayla? Makayla, can you hear me?"

The formality had puzzled Jake for a moment, staring oddly at the tsahik as she continued to carefully inspect his sister's avatar. Peering over at his wife, he noticed Neytiri looking back at him, waiting patiently with her tail gently swaying behind her, the way she normally looked when she expected him to figure something out. Whatever it was, it would have to wait as Jake shook his head and turned back toward the radio, making contact his first priority.

"Dirty Falcon, Dirty Falcon, do you read me? This is Devil Dog, over." Jake pressed into the radio before letting go of the button, not as enthusiastic for a reply.

"What is happening?" Tonowari questioned.

"I've been trying to reach our human allies with the Omatikaya all afternoon, but so far no one's responding."

"And I take it that is not normal either?"

A shadow falls over Jake's eyes as he glares into the piece of technology in front of him, "No."

"J-- Jake! We have a situation."

A familiar voice suddenly buzzes through the device before being abruptly cut off. The whole room stills as if time had stopped. Jake hadn't noticed he was holding his breath as he stared down at the radio until his lungs burned and his heart squeezed painfully in his chest. With a start, Jake greedily sucks in air as he quickly moves to grab the radio,

"Norm, what's going on?" He harshly demands, "What happened?"

"Lab compromised-- can't--"

The connection cuts off again but Jake doesn't give up, desperate for an answer, "Norm! Come on... Norm, do you copy? Where's Kayla?"

"She... She's gone!"

The air completely sucks out of his lungs, his brain scrambling for a reasonable explanation. He didn't have to look around to know that everyone else would be panicked and concerned as well. Ronal had stood up straight once more, standing near Kayla's feet as her expression reared back with affliction, her eyes darting to Tonowari as they both shared a look of genuine fright. Spider noticed their exchange out of the corner of his eye before looking back down at the body in front of him, his chest feeling tight as the news sunk in, his small hand leaning near Kayla's as if afraid that touching her hand would somehow evaporate her avatar's form. The lightest brush of skin against his elbow let him know that Ao'nung was still right beside him.

Jake could feel the rushing of his heartbeat pulsing loudly in his ears as he absorbed the information. All other rational thoughts jump out the window as he suddenly snaps and growled into the communication device, "What do you mean 'gone?' Norm, what the fuck happened?"

Neytiri didn't even have the heart to chastise her husband for such language in front of the children, her own mind spiraling at all of the possibilities that might have befallen her people, let alone Kayla. Tuk's hand instinctively reaches up to grab her mother's when she feels the older woman's distress, the air stale with tension as all eyes are fixed on the radio.

"I had to force an emergency shutdown on Kayla's link in progress," Norm finally manages to explain without the connection cutting him off, "High Camp had to evacuate because we thought our location might've been compromised. We all scattered and ran to hide and avoid capture, but when we made it to the rendevous she didn't show up-- And... she's not here, Jake. We went back to camp when the coast was clear and Kayla is the only one not accounted for."

That could mean anything, but Jake wasn't ready to make any conclusions until he got the full story, "Who compromised High Camp?"

"Quaritch."

The room felt silent once more, dread swimming in Jake's gut as he closed his eyes and heaved a large, exhausted sigh. One of his ears flicked in the direction he knew Kiri was kneeling down to wrap her arms protectively around Spider without even having to look.

"He had been sighted scouting the Hallelujah Mountains for days prior to this. We thought he might've finally found us so we dispersed."

Jake's head spun with emotions, trying not to let anger get the better of him as he clutched the radio, "Why didn't you call in these sightings to me? I would've come back."

"Because we thought he was after YOU, Jake. If you had come running back, he would've been there, waiting for you."

He took a deep breath, "Do we know for sure Quaritch has Kayla?"

"We're still looking, but... look-- Kayla grabbed a radio before we split up and scattered. There was a tracker, and when we got back, Max tried to access it, but the signal was lost nearly halfway to our rendevous point. If Quaritch snatched her, he could be anywhere by now."

"... So why Kayla? Did he take her to get to me?"

"That's what I thought originally. But Jake-- we don't think he's reporting back to Ardmore anymore."

Norm's words clearly surprise Jake, eyes briefly widening before they return to their normal shape. Unaware of Jake's reaction, Norm's voice continues to come in through the radio, "We've been monitoring RDA radio chatter and there were never any indicators that he never called in a strike against the camp. Ardmore didn't send an army, it was just him. I think he acted alone on this, against Ardmore's orders. Or maybe she doesn't know about it. All I know is he's after something or someone, whether it's you or something else, he knows that Kayla has what he wants."

Jake feels a weight of revelation sink in his stomach, slowly peering over his shoulder, only to find that Spider was already looking back at him. As expected, Kiri was kneeling behind her best friend and her long blue arms encompassed the human teen's shoulders, tightening further when her father's gaze landed on them. Spider doesn't move or even breathe for that matter, the kid's eyes wide with what could only be described as fear.

"I think I know what he's after," Jake muttered back into the radio, his eyes never leaving Spider's, "Let me get back to you with a plan, Norm."

He cuts contact on the radio and rushes to stand up. Kiri, assuming the worst after seeing the look in his eye when he gazed at Spider, speaks up before her father can even say a word, "Dad, you can't leave her! Not like when you left Spider!"

Jake winced, an apologetic expression directed at the boy in question before he straightened his posture, looking around at the room of Na'vi all staring at him expectedly. The weight of Toruk Makto was heavy on his shoulders once more... only this time it felt worse. The fear of failure was worse.

Quaritch likely has Kayla, and the very thought of the Recom holding his sister hostage brought that same, deep-rooted fear he had festered when Quaritch had taken his daughters. The haunted image of Quaritch's knife against Kayla's throat when they were fighting on the ship didn't help that fear. Looking over and meeting Neytiri's eyes, Jake saw that same haunted expression on her face, the look of someone who had lost so many of her loved ones to the colonel. Quaritch was responsible for her father's death, and the lives that were lost when Hometree fell. Quaritch was responsible for Tsu'tey, for Grace, for Trudy... Neteyam... Hell, he might have been the one held responsible for the death of Neytiri's sister, Sylwanin.

Turning back and taking one look at Spider's pleading eyes, Jake was desperate to ensure that Kayla wouldn't be added to Quaritch's growing list.

Jake's expression hardened, hiding away his thoughts while addressing Kiri, "I won't, baby girl. Not this time."

~~~~~~~~~

A/n: In between chapters, I asked for a couple of commissions from the following:

I'd like to thank @sullyfortress for this beautiful masterpiece of Kayla!

And @rocklobster0 for making this cute chibi art of Kayla/Tonowari/Ronal! You guys are amazing individuals and are so gifted😍Thank you so much!

#tsamsiyu ta'em fic #ronal x tonowari x oc #ronal x oc x tonowari #ronal x oc #tonowari x oc x ronal #tonowari x ronal x oc #tonowari x oc #tonowari x ronal #ronal x tonowari #atwow fic #atwow fics #atwow fanfic #atwow fanfiction #ao3 fanfic #atwow #avatar the way of water #avatar 2 #james cameron avatar

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