#even their mentor was like. 'well youre quiet and you get your work done well so i guess you can have the shop when i die'

[zipmode]

Mannnn Conviction has got childhood lore I haven't even BEGUN to elaborate upon. And maybe I never will <3

[furiousgoldfish]

I didn't see this right away, but my parents refusing to teach me anything really got to me, and not only in the way of lacking survival skills. I was being told things like 'how old are you not to know this' and 'you should know this by now' constantly, but nobody ever took the time or patience to explain or demonstrate to me how anything works. I had school education, so I was able to absorb information, but that was still, me being one of the 20+ children sitting down, with one adult who spent more time trying to keep us disciplined and quiet, than managing to explain anything. If I didn't get anything, I was too afraid to ask. I was being told I was stupid on a daily basis anyway.

My parents insisted that I was too stupid to get anything, too clumsy and ignorant and incapable, so it wasn't worth trying to teach me anything, it was a waste of energy. I was supposed to absorb knowledge by looking at what they're doing, but they would often give me other tasks to do, I wasn't free to observe. I believed that I was specifically dumb and incapable, and this was the only reason why I didn't have any skills. I actually believed that I was clumsy, stupid, incapable of doing anything correctly. I didn't think I was worth teaching, worth mentoring.

There was one time I was in my friend's house, and there was a guitar. I touched it, fascinated, since I've never had the chance to touch one before. My friend's father saw my interest, and offered to show me how to play. I was flabbergasted. He showed me how to hold it, how to press my fingers on the strings to create different chords, how to make sound happen. It took maybe 20 minutes. But it was the first time an adult showed me how something worked, and I felt.. unworthy. I didn't understand how could I deserve so much of someone's time and patience, because it had never happened before. I couldn't retain the knowledge, because that was the last time I ever touched a guitar, I never got the chance again. I still feel indebted for that 20 minutes, it feels like too much spent on me.

I thought back to those moments a lot, thinking about how special I felt for an adult to believe that I was worth teaching. If someone gave me a guitar now, I'd be ecstatic to try and learn it, because I remember that someone thought I could, someone showed me how. All of the other skills, I had to learn while already thinking I would fail, that I couldn't do it, and had to deal with extensive negative mindset before even trying to start. There is no skill that one can do perfectly on the first time, we all start by being awful, and then slowly get better with practice. But, with the 'I fail at everything and even if I try it will go bad' mindset, the awful start feels like a confirmation that we cannot do this, that we're too incapable, or stupid, or lacking in talent. Since all my work was heavily criticized no matter how well I've done, I had to go back and figure out what things I actually do okay, and criticism was unwarranted, and where I've actually been lacking in knowledge. And that is a complicated thing to do, when all of the criticism feels so painful, and even trying to do something makes you hear the words of ridicule, degradation and berating in your head. It makes you want to go the route of perfectionism, to try and do things so well they would be above criticism in general, but that's impossible. Criticism we receive in abuse is not actual criticism, it's often directed at us only to hurt our feelings, to discourage us, mock us, make us feel inadequate, sometimes even out of jealousy or because our capabilities present a threat, so they need to run that down. But how would we know? If all feedback is negative, it's impossible for us to sort trough what is a confirmation of being awful, and what is a jealous remark created to sabotage our good work.

Sometimes it feels bad learning everything on my own. Finding online tutorials and youtube videos for every skill imaginable, sifting trough forums to find information on finances and economy, trying to put together how society works by analyzing how people live and not daring to ask them to explain how they got where they are now. I had no guidance, and sometimes things would be too complicated, and I would give up. I often wish I could ask someone to explain it to me, instead of typing questions into google. The information is stored differently when it comes from a human, it creates warmth and the knowledge that someone cared enough to explain it to me, that I didn't have to put it together from various sources myself.

Learning basic survival and life skills was unnecessarily painful for me. I still have things I cannot do, just because of how much pain is associated with them. But to think everything could have been as simple as that guitar! If every time I showed interest in something, an adult who knew how it worked sat down next to me, demonstrated it, gave it to me to hold, put my hands in the right places, and directed me to what I should do. Would I ever have trouble believing in myself? It wouldn't have crossed my mind that there's anything I can't do. Or that I would fundamentally be bad at anything, just because I'm bad at it on the first attempt. When you're a kid, you don't even know if you're doing good or bad, if your first attempt gets a 'good job!', you're incentivized to do it again, until you do get good at it. That's why we encourage children, not to lie to them, but because we know how painful it is to be told off on your first try, and that it will make the second try unlikely.

Today I understand that all skills are gained trough practice, and that I can pick and choose what skills I want, and I can get them with enough practice. I can and do give up on some that are too frustrating, and that's okay too, we are all more inclined towards some activities, while others feel bad even with improvement.

As a kid I was enveloped by fear of not being able to do anything, not being useful enough to be kept alive, never being good at anything, not finding any kind of place in the world, just because I can't do anything right. All of that fear was necessary, there's tons of stuff that anyone can do, with some more complicated stuff that one needs to be specialized in, but it's not necessary for survival, or even for earning a place in society. We all have a place, by birthright, and just having skills is not as important as with what purpose you're using them for. You can be extremely skilled and using those skills to exploit, destroy and do damage to society, or even to isolate some members of society who you can then hurt. Or you can have very few skills but be insistent on using what you do only to help those around you be safe and sound.

[ms-fandomgirl]

Studying Headcanons

Summary: Morning, afternoon, evening. The grind never seems to stop, but it can be a little less painful when you’re studying with your favorite Haikyuu boys!

Pairings: Oikawa Tooru x Reader; Akaashi Keiji x Reader; Kuroo Tetsurou x Reader

Genre: Fluff! No warnings.

Words: 1,464

Cross-posted on Ao3!

O i k a w a   T o o r u

Diffused early morning rays bathed Oikawa’s sleepy face in a soft glow, making you want to give anything to witness the scene firsthand. The world shone brighter when Oikawa’s name appeared on your phone screen, even if it was 9 o’clock at night for you. He gave you a quiet greeting, and you smiled and returned the favor, idly flipping your textbook open.  

It’s just a fact: being on opposite sides of the world from Oikawa Tooru sucked. These FaceTimes and phone calls were the closest you could get to being with him in person. Time zone differences made it so that you only had a couple hours of sacred shared time in a day. Therefore, you were determined to not waste a second of them. The second Oikawa began, so do you.

Ambitious, driven, and clever; it’s no surprise that Oikawa exceled in studying, and this was one skill he was determined to pass on to you. After complaining one day that you could never study well, Oikawa took it upon himself to become your studying mentor, showing you every tip and trick he knew. The biggest of these was finding yourself a study partner: someone who could keep you on track and encourage you, yet not distract you from getting work done. For him, it was Iwazumi. For you, it was Oikawa.

A mostly quiet but firm presence on your phone screen, Oikawa made sure you were working on what you were supposed to. The second you tried to scroll through Instagram or any social media, he would know, and he would tell you. It was honestly terrifying how he could tell, even if you were on your laptop. You two quickly fell into a steady routine, with him doing his morning routine while you suffered (a little less) in silence over your studies.

Of course, you didn’t spend the whole call in silence. Oikawa knew the importance of study breaks after all. Therefore, you were given the rare chance to see a side of Oikawa that many didn’t know existed. The quiet, reflective side that only appeared when he was most comfortable. The thoughtful chats over a shared cup of coffee (even if it was much too late for you to be drinking any), and the small, routine actions made you feel as though you knew intimate secrets about him.

Yes, studying with Oikawa had its challenges, but you wouldn’t change it for the world. And when you got an “A” in the class you were sure you’d fail, you also realized you found a bond deeper than you had ever known.  

A k a a s h i   K e i j i

Soft shadows were beginning to lengthen in the afternoon light as you stepped into the cozy café. As always, Akaashi was there before you, sipping some tea in the booth that was unofficially yours. After ordering your favorite drink and pastry, you settled in next to him, a mixture of happiness and anxiousness settling in your stomach. Happiness because, well, you got to spend the whole afternoon in a coffee shop that looked like it belonged in a Hallmark movie with THE Akaashi Keiji. Anxiousness because Akaashi was a harsh proofreader, and you were sure your poor paper would comeback with more red ink than black.

When you were first partnered to proofread Akaashi’s paper in your English class, you had no clue what you were getting yourself into. Akaashi proofread like there was no tomorrow, and the first time you got your paper back, you were tempted to scrap your whole idea and start over. Of course, Akaashi wouldn’t let you do this, instead patiently explaining all of his markings and reasonings to you.

Now, two years later, Akaashi was your number one confidant when it came to writing papers. From brainstorming to final drafts, he was your go-to and sounding board, and you acted in much the same way for him. Even though you were both in different classes and writing different topics, papers were still papers, so the fundamental process never changed.

You weren’t naïve enough to believe that continuing to meet your proofreader partner two years after the class was normal. Despite this, it was easy to consider Akaashi as part of your norm. From his calm attitude to sharp mind, he had crept into your life slowly yet steadily, like a trail of ivy resolutely climbing up a wall, exploring for any niches and crannies to cling onto and never let go.

After several minutes of searching, you triumphantly presented your paper to him with a grin on your face. It was crinkled around the edges, and one page was dangling from the edge of the staple holding everything together. Nonetheless, Akaashi accepted it in his way of respectful grace that you could never quite seem to master. In return, he unhooked his binder, pulling his paper free of its folder. Organized, crisp, and put-together: Akaashi’s natural modus operandi. The more you thought about it, the more it seemed to be a miracle you two got along at all.  

Glancing down at the title of his final project, the paper he had been slaving away on for the past month, you felt a warmth that only continued to grow with each word. Your relationship didn’t make sense at first glance, but that hardly mattered. Happenstance may have helped you meet, but you were determined to stand by Akaashi’s side for as long as you could, exploring any possibility to come. Apparently, Akaashi felt the same way.

“Comfort in Chaos: The Beauty of Contradictions

A Memoir by Akaashi Keiji”

K u r o o   T e t s u r o u  

Silver streams of moonlight illuminated the library table you and Kuroo had decided to call home for the night. Wrappers of fast food long since eaten were pushed into the corner as diagram trees and flash cards created a messy mosaic, the white board next to them looking like the scribblings of a mad scientist.  To the side, two bodies laid sprawled across the worn carpet, furiously solving the problems before them. During broad daylight, this behavior would have most certainly resulted in a reprimand from a librarian. However, due to the late hour, you two basically had the whole floor to yourself.

In a triumphant cry, Kuroo had reached an answer. Slamming his pencil down next to him, he waited with a satisfied grin on his face as you finished not a second after. After giving him an exaggerated eye-roll, you leaned over to compare answers, pleased that you had both reached the same result. With a quick high-five, you moved onto the next question in the practice test.

 It was always like this between you two. Everything was a competition, from who could finish their problems first to who could get the most answers correct. When you had first met Kuroo, you found this behavior to be annoying at best. Always beating you to raise your hand in class, you had labeled him as a classic teacher’s pet and wanted to leave things at that.

However, fate had other plans for you. Forced into a disastrous lab where your third group member ruined the experiment and ditched halfway through, you and Kuroo had to put your differences aside to not fail your assignment. After several late nights of lab writeups and gossiping about your flakey third member, you found that Kuroo was actually someone you wanted to work with long after the assignment was completed. Thankfully, Kuroo shared your sentiment, and you two quickly became attached to the hip both in and out of the classroom.

 Obviously smart to a fault, Kuroo was also incredibly charismatic and funny. It simply wasn’t fair. If you told him you needed to ace the next test, you could count on him to drag you through study session after study session, making sure you knew what you were supposed to no matter how much you wanted to give up. You admired that about him, that determination that seemed so much a part of him that it ran through his veins like blood. While you had great plans for the future, you could quickly become overwhelmed by the path you had set for yourself. However, with Kuroo by your side, you knew that you could weather whatever storm came your way, trusting him to always have your back.

A/N: Thanks for reading! I wrote these ages ago but forgot to post them until now. They were a fun little writing exercise for me where I tried to write a scene with no dialogue. I hope they motivate you during finals/test season!

[callofdudes]

Been a while since I requested something, I shall grace this page with a request of being best friends with gaz headcanon please bestie 😊😊😊

Welcome back bestie 😊😊 I promise I'm working on all your other requests but mental health be doing backflips and I kinda feel like shit. I got some Gaz for you though.

Being best friends with Kyle "Gaz" Garrick.

Gaz is incredibly smart. If you look at his records his fighting reflex and knowledge is top chart stuff. But Gaz keeps it all very quiet. He doesn't boast about it like Soap would so when he does end up flipping heads on the enemy it's like "woah where did that guy come from-!"

Gaz uses this same skill to protect you. When you came to 141 Gaz was already settling. He had Ghost as a mentor and almost an older brother, and Soap as... Well he wasn't sure who he was supposed to be. But he had his team, and you seemed to easily click with Soap and Ghost.

Gaz wouldn't force you to be friends with him. Of course he introduced himself and you both talked occasionally but he didn't know if it was a friendship per say. And that was ok. He'd still protect you with his life any day of the week.

However you really did have intense feelings of friendship for Gaz. But you thought because of his quiet nature that he was closed off like Simon. Which in fact wasn't the case when you got him talking. He was just shyer than the others.

The first time you and Gaz really, properly hung out was on a quiet night at base, Gaz had finished his tasks and had nothing really to do. He enjoyed his time playing Dungeons and Dragons, (headcannon from @itsscromp) unfortunately he couldn't ever get the others to play. Ghost was too busy, Price wasn't fully interested, and Johnny just cared to cause chaos.

And then he noticed you were also done your work. "Well Kyle, there's no harm." And he went to ask you. And it went well. Turns out you wanted to play DND, and after playing for almost four hours together it solidified that.

And Gaz was really glad to have you as one of his few friends.

And now that you were friends you really did learn a lot more about him. Gaz would go down in a fire for you, no questions asked. Seems stupid but he specializes in VIP protection. You think he wouldn't protect you?? Think again. You're VIP to him. You all are.

Loves you a lot but is too shy to say it and think you'll get the wrong idea.

And look, you don't have skin that clear on the battlefield without having some kind of routine. This man looks after his skin like the temple his body is. (when he's not eating junk food.)

Yeah, your skin isn't cutting it for him. Sorry babes, get in the bathtub we are rinsing your hair and slapping some hydration on that forehead because Gaz knows you are gone need it to be crawling around the musty dusty desert with him.

Now, Knight is openly queer, so you know Gaz is a little spice of life as well. He keeps it under wraps and isn't as open about it in his career because he doesn't think you guys need to know and or he's met people in past expanses that didn't take so kindly to him being open about it.

He's the gay best friend, it's not overbearing. You know how most gay men are just different in a fun way. That's Gaz but he has it toned down so at first you couldn't tell and then it just clicked and you were like "woah". But you can kinda tell there just, there a something there you thinks.

You gotta keep him out of trouble to. You have to be his discernment. He's got relationship smarts but if he's even remotely cute and no good, time for bestie to step in. Sorry Gaz, not today. Your bestie is not letting you get yourself into that mess.

His gun does most of the talking and he carries a side arm so if anyone gives you smoke their gonna get got.

He's smart but also the silent, immediately jumps to using his gun conclusion guy. So if someone bullies you in the grocery store he pulls out his gun and you've gotta be like "Woah woah, not necessary mate, nooot necessary 😅😅"

Hates trash reality TV but watches it anyway. Drags you into the torture as well.

He spills the tea. He spills it always. He sometimes just walks around quietly not taking up too much air and hearing conversations and by the end of it he's got so much to tell you.

Not quite sure what I think Gaz's childhood looked like but I assume he didn't have too many friends. I could see him as the shy kid who focused more on academics and played in the trees of his backyard alone over having a boat load of friends.

So when you do things like buy him stuff or give him cuddles and affection he has this epiphany. Like this is what I've been missing!

Your comfort and affection is something he truly loves so much, but the house and traditions he grew up with weren't the most overly affectionate, and in his career there wasn't much cuddling with the homies in his unit either.

Yeah you give him cuddles he's like a leach, he'll leave when he wants to leave and only when. And he likes to sometimes cling on by surprise. When he becomes so comfortable around you he'll often waltz into your office and wrap his arms around your neck from behind, watching what you're doing.

"You done yet??"

"I'll tell you when I'm done ok?"

"Ok...... Y/n??"

"Not all of us are as fast as you at paperwork y'know"

"Sorry."

You take Gaz and Soap on adventures together and you still can't wrap your head around hos they're friends. Completely chaotic, loud and chipper faced with slightly annoyed at the loudness, just as chaotic on the inside and together you get one big Gaz Soap salad. Sticking them in a car for five hours together was a mistake for your sake.

Gaz doesn't open up about his feelings a lot, but look at you 😄 look at you helping him to open up and ask for help. To ask for the care that he needs when things get tough for him.

He was alone before that terrorist attack where he met Price and that was s very scary time for him. Looking back on it from his place in 141 Gaz was much more scared on the field then than he is now. Probably because he's got a team he knows he'll always be able to trust and confide in.

That's the best part of having you as a friend. He can confide in you with anything. And knowing him, you can also confide in him. Whatever secrets you tell him are lock and key baby. He won't tell a single soul.

Gaz tried to do all the things you've done for him, for you. When you need someone to give you a hug or some cuddles Gaz will do his best to comfort you and show you that same infectious love and care.

Whenever you have a nightmare he's right there for you. Wrapping his arms around you to keep you steady, holding you up when you can't.

He'll always try.

Celebrates your accomplishments as well. When you get promoted or a medal, hell when you do everything he's on your sideline cheering. And it's like his shyness is gone when he sees his friends receiving praise for something. He'll cheer louder than everyone in the room for you all.

But the one thing your friendship isn't above is England. If you diss on England, or their football, prepare to get got. Tickle attacks or hitting you with a pillow as punishment.

At the end of the day three of your friends are British and one of them is Scottish which starts petty squabbles between Gaz and Soap sometimes. It's all playful but sometimes Soap wants to start some shit and you end up having to try and separate them before they wrestle each other to death.

And there is probably so much more I'm missing, but remember. Whenever you need someone to watch your six, Gaz is already there. Whenever you need someone you can spend some quiet time with when things get overwhelming, you know where to find Gaz. And when life gives you bullshit. Gaz has a Glock.

[exocynraku]

13 + warrior cats for the ask game!!

13: worst blorbofication not sure if this question is asking for the worst of the fandoms blorbofication or MY worst blorboficaiton but i'm going to go with mine and its . brokenstar . hes one of the Worst-er villains in the series imo because of his whole sending children to war thing but there's something about that and his whole character thats just so interesting to me you don't know who your mom is, your adopted mom doesn't really care about you, your dad is part kittypet which means you are as well which is supposedly 'bad'. you are labelled as 'broken' even as a child. your siblings, who potentially could've been the two to save you from your future fate are dead, killed as a punishment from starclan. starclan killed them. starclan must want you dead aswell. you spend your entire childhood. you want to prove yourself to starclan, you want to prove yourself to your mysterious mother, and so you want to be strong. you want to be as strong as possible, and work your way up the ranks-- but your mentor is too 'weak' and 'pathetic' to train you, so you go to your father, the only cat you have now for training instead. your father becomes leader, with the weak little white cat as deputy. he dies, and then it's the flirty fox's turn, the one distracting your father. distracting him from training you. she dies, and then finally, it's your turn. but this isn't what you want. you want to lead, you don't want to be led. and how long it is going to take for your father to die? and what do you owe to him, why should you serve him like a pet at all? he may have trained you, but it's the least he could've done. he didn't take care of you when you were a kitten or tell you about your mother or anything like that! so you kill him, because YOU want to be the strongest and now you are. you have so, so much power. and you see starclan. you see the ones who wanted you dead, suddenly congratulating you for what you've done. and it feels good. you've proven yourself to them. though, something's happening. new kits are being born. they're playing in camp, smiling and giggling. you never did that. when was the last time you smiled? their mothers love them. yours never did. if you were never allowed to be happy, then why should they? so you train them, and maybe there's a few.... casualties... along a the way, but now they're just as strong as you are! and the weak, the old decrepit weak, just like your old mentor. why should they stay here? they never did anything for you, just as your mentor did. so you exile them. and now you are even stronger. though, there's someone getting in the way. the medicine cat. who you look... oddly similar to. but that doesn't matter. you pin a murder on her, and have her exiled. and now all of your problems are fine, yes? for a little bit, maybe, but then you go and try to attack thunderclan, and-- oh. it's that medicine cat you exiled. your surprise holds you back, allowing her the chance to, in one swipe, strip everything and anything away from you. it's quiet now. a dreary old den you lay in, guarded by cats you've never met. the wretched smell of thunderclan coats your nose. the medicine cats comes and sits with you. she feeds you something, they don't taste very good. you start to feel weaker. this isn't what you want. you want to be strong. you start to go numb, feel smaller than you were. but this isn't what you want. none of this is what you want. why can't you just what what you want? your life is being stripped from you. that's not how this was supposed to be. you were supposed to be leader, forever. leader, forever? that's a childs fantasy.

[faithshouseofchaos]

Ok poll voting time (while I work on werewolf pato)

Franco x driver reader- She is a rookie who started before him and the others on the grid are protective of her since she has no one with her (her family never goes to see her or supports her). They start talking and the other drivers act like older brothers.

Summary — Oscar developed feelings for his mentor's oldest daughter and will do anything for her attention. Or three times Oscar tried to get Y/n’s attention and the one time he got it.

Mark Webber with wife reader. He was looking very sexy and all hot in his racing suit for the Moto GP. She's having a hard time controlling herself and Mark notices it. He teases her about it. Just something fluff and maybe a little suggestive 👀.

quiet day in with simi x gn! reader (it’s fine if you don’t wanna do gender neutral, i’m just a guy so fem stories make me a little uncomfortable) just cuddles and enjoying some quiet time during the prime parts of both of the drivers careers. alternatively, seb proposing to kimi and reader and shocking both of them (including kimi)

hi i don't think this is a real request but for franco colapinto it's kinda cliche ikr (but i believe in your writing skills so) older reader (u don't need to specific the age) who refuse to be with franco bc she thinks it's better for him to be with someone close his age, but ofc they're in love and franco is down bad for her even though she's kinda cruel sometimes so angst with a happy end? or at least something realistic? idk and it's up to u to add other stuff!

Well, maybe you could do something like Argentinian non famous reader (not necessarily Argentinian but u know) dating him and nobody knows about her, till one day they both went tired of people assuming he's single n PUM, hard launch. I don't know if I explained this correctly, English isn't my first language so I'm sorry bby 🥺

Already done and posted

So, imagine this: You're one of the beloved drivers on the grid – who is close to the Ferrari duo – known for their love of nature, especially flowers.One day flowers kept appearing in your locker room (?) and it kept going for months. At the end of every race when you went to change there were different flowers but no info about the sender. Naturally, you suspected Sebastian because that man is mother nature himself. After learning he's not the culprit you try to find out who's been sending you flowers. (Spoiler Alert: It's the Ice Man himself.)

Poly!Sebson x reader f1 x Greek mythology Dionysus!jenson and aristaeus!sebastian human!fem reader

[herofics]

Back to me, Nanami

A/N: I just wanted some Nanami fluff. Idk what this really is, but I just wanted to write something and I didn’t actually have a plan for this. Might be kinda OOC since I’ve never really written Nanami before, but eeeh

“I know he’s Gojo’s student, but I’m sure he’s not nearly as annoying” you chuckled as you set down two cups of tea on the kitchen table.

You sat down opposite of Nanami and took a sip of your tea.

“I’m well aware of that. I don’t think anyone can ever match that idiot in how annoying he can be” Nanami sighed. “Could we not talk about him? Just thinking of that blindfolded moron is raising my blood pressure”

“I know, I know. I’m just a bit nervous about tomorrow. I know you don’t particularly like babysitting, but you are a good mentor. I’m just hoping you’re not too hard on him” you smiled softly and reached for his hand that was resting on the table.

Nanami laced his fingers with yours gently, and raised his gaze from your hands to your face. He just looked at you for a while, memorizing the details of your face like it was the last time he was going to see you. He knew that was a possibility, in his line of work especially.

“You worry me sometimes, you know, going all quiet like that” you said.

“I’m just making sure I get a good look at you. I don’t ever want to forget your beautiful face” he smiled softly, his eyes searching your face for any signs of annoyance.

“That’s sweet… would you like a closer look?” you smirked and stood up, stepping closer to him.

You placed your hand on Nanami’s cheek and he kissed your wrist, before pulling you closer and into his lap.

You giggled as he looked at you adoringly, feeling yourself blushing under his gaze.

“I love you” Nanami said.

You felt flustered and didn’t understand why his words had such an effect on you. You’d heard those words before, many times, and while you always got butterflies from hearing them, the reaction wasn’t usually this strong. Maybe it was just the way you said it. Looking at you with such adoration and love that it made your heart flutter, even more so than usual.

“Kento?” you asked quietly.

“Hmm?”

“Just promise to come back to me safely, okay?” you said, fiddling with his collar.

“I promise” he pledged.

“I love you” you smiled softly and pulled him into a kiss.

Nanami’s other hand was in your hair and the other one on your waist, pulling you as close to him as he possibly could. He didn’t really understand what he’d done to deserve someone like you, someone so wonderfully kind and strong.Whatever the reason he was going to hold on to you as long as he could.

[oleander-nin]

This is for the follower Special!

Rise Donnie

6. Jealousy

1. “Well that wasn’t very smart”

Romantic, maybe Reader is jealous because Donnie has intelligence for what they wanna be smart with

Idk I'm doin my best sifusufd

A/N, not important: Sorry if I made it too sad, I tried not to. This was very fun to write, and I liked it a lot. Thank you for participating in this special! Any criticism is welcome, constructive or not. This is supposed to be a gender neutral reader, so if I screwed up somewhere, please tell me.

-Ollie

Tw: jealousy, feelings of not being enough, talking about your emotions, hand holding, bad writing, barely edited

Words: 2159

Prompt(s) requested: 6(Jealousy) & 1("Well That wasn't very smart.")

Summary: Donnie notices somethings wrong, leading to a small talk about your jealousy of his intelligence and your feelings of unworthiness.

The door to Donnie’s lab beeps once before the light turns green, notifying my allowed entrance. The door opens with a quiet hiss, my eyes admiring his lab in awe once more. I close my eyes, sighing. Everything in here was so… Advanced. It was incredible, Donnie had made things current scientists couldn’t even dream of. And he did it all on his own, no teachers, no mentors, just him. I couldn’t help the bite of jealousy in my stomach and I did nothing to stop the guilt that soon followed. Loving Donnie was easy, with his cocky attitude and his bright eyes. He was passionate, a true scientist. A Genius. He was so much better than me, and it killed me a little more every time because I knew I would never match up to him, never be able to stand on the same ground as the man I loved so dearly.

I sigh, moving further through his lab until I saw him at his computer, working his fingers off once more. I smiled sadly at the bags under his eyes, the fabric usually skewing them from view being set off to the side along with his goggles and wrappings. I move to sit in my usual chair next to him, watching as he works through his code. He glances at me, smiling softly before returning to his work. We both sit in silence for a while, the sound of his fingers typing and the ever present hum of the technology around us filling the empty space between us. It was nice, the familiarity of just existing by his side, no need for us to talk. We only needed to be near each other, and that was enough for us both.

“How long have you been up?” I ask softly, watching as the code flys across his screen, taking mental notes for my own projects later. I may never be on his level, but I could at least learn from him. He was brilliant and I was simply someone watching him succeed from the sidelines, hoping one day I could work alongside him. I’d leave the actual engineering to him though. I never did like building bots and such, coding them was much more fun.

He hums noncommittally, his fingers hesitating for only a second as he thinks. “Just since this morning. I need to get this done soon. I promise I’ll sleep once I’m finished, okay?” His voice is soft, his eyes not leaving the screen. I didn’t mind, this is how it always went. I wouldn’t want to stop either if I was him, if I could do the things he could do. My brain never made the right connections, the pieces never snapping into place. 

"Okay. As long as you promise. You know I worry." And worry I do, unable to think anything without constantly checking to make sure he was okay. He looks exhausted, his purple hoodie draping over him, the sleeves bagging at his elbows from his pose. His hood was up, most likely to try and muffle the sounds of his lab. His legs were crossed in his gaming chair, his back hunched even more than usual. I wondered how his back could even stand it, how his posture was so good otherwise. Maybe the curve of his shell just made it easier to manage. I’d have to ask him later, when it wasn’t so late. When he wasn’t so busy.

A line of code I didn’t recognize catches my eye, a call I couldn’t figure out. My eyes scan the screen as I lean on his desk, my eyes scan his computer, trying to decipher the line's purpose. My eyes narrow as I frown, unable to make the proper connections in my brain to understand it. I grumble a bit, pointing at the line. Donnie stops for a moment, looking at me. He was always ready to explain, ready to waste his time on talking me through something he found so simple, something that was as natural to him as breathing. He waits patiently for me to ask my question and I can’t help but feel like I was proving how beneath him I was, proving how every thought my mind made up was true. “What does this part do?”

I listened intently to his explanation, my head resting in my arms on his desk, curled up in the chair that was almost solely occupied by me. His explanation was clear, scrolling though his hundreds of lines of code to show me what parts it tied back to, talking of the parts he needed to add to make it completely smooth. My mouth was set in a smile, admiring his passion for the science of it. I ignored the pang in my chest, ignored the way my heart craved to be the same, to be able to match his intelligence. Even if just for a day.

“I wish I could do this as well as you.” I say, my voice is quiet due to the time. It was late at night, when my visits usually were. Donnie would text and I would show up, never wanting to miss a moment I could spend by his side. Donnie glances at me, his fingers finally leaving his keyboard as he turns his chair so he could face me. I sit up a bit, my elbow off the desk as I set my hands in my lap. Donnie scans my face, his lips pressed into a line. I scan his back, trying to decipher what he was thinking, to take a look inside his head. Maybe he was trying the same, to try and look into my thoughts, to read me without needing to ask for clarification. Unfortunately for us both, we couldn’t read each other's mind, couldn’t dive into the deep abyss that was our subconscious without taking the time to ask.

“What do you mean? You’re getting so much better at coding and I thought I was helping. Did something happen?” His eyes hold a kindness I never understood, one that should have never been directed at me. I couldn’t help but feel as if he would be better off with someone more on his level, someone who could match him pace for pace. Donnie was the brightest star in the night and I was just a mirror, stealing his light and passing it off as my own. I wanted nothing more than to be like him, my fingers itched to code the way he did. So seamlessly, completely flawless. Most of it had been from years of practice, but the way his brain just… Clicked with the code. It made me all the more envious. 

I shrink slightly, his words weighing me down. I didn’t want to feel this way, not about him. It wasn’t fair. I should be nothing less than ecstatic towards everything he does. There shouldn’t be this disconnect in my brain, it was all so straight forward. He was my boyfriend, my best friend, and my favorite person in the world. I hated feeling jealous because I wasn’t mad about his success, I was just… I wanted it for myself, to be able to have it with him. I wanted to be just like him. “No no no no no, of course you’re helping! I just… I’m not progressing very fast.”

“Of course you’re not. This stuff takes time dum dum. You can’t rush this.” His tone is very matter of factly, his smile wide as he relays the information. His eyes scan me once more, pupils shrinking as they narrow. His fingers tap on his desk, my body shrinking under his unrelenting stare. “Something’s wrong. Spill. According to Mikey, communication is key to all relationships and I’m not letting you leave until you talk.”

I huff slightly and he just raises an eyebrow muscle, waiting for me to talk. I run my fingers through my hair, slumping back in the seat. Knowing it would be pointless to lie or argue, I spill the beans. “I have been a bit… Jealous of you lately.” I admit, not meeting his eyes. Donnie waves his hand in a circular motion, prompting me to continue. “You’re so much smarter than me and it’s just… I can’t help thinking about how you’d leave me for someone more on your level. I just want to be as smart as you, but I’m not.”

“And you didn’t come to me with this, why exactly?” He asks, his arms crossed over his chest. I pat my thighs awkwardly, still not meeting his gaze. He was upset, that was obvious, but I didn’t know how to explain my feelings in a way that would make it all go away. I wanted nothing more than to be normal about his success and not have so much jealousy over his accomplishments, but the feeling remained.

“I uh… I thought you’d get mad, and I didn’t want to risk losing you over some stupid way I felt.” I admit, rubbing the back of my neck. I stare at the floor, rocking the chair back and forth to try and let off some of the energy coursing through me. My fingers danced across my legs, tapping out nonsensical rhythms to accompany my shame.

“Well that wasn’t a very smart way to think.”

I look up at him, his eyes still narrowed at me and his lips pull into a small frown. I chuckle nervously, not sure how to respond. He was right but I felt like I would be dragged to Mikey if I said the wrong thing. I really didn’t want to wake the poor guy, he was always grumpy in the morning. “What?”

Donnie sighs, pinching the bridge between his eyes. He takes my hand and brings it to his chest, holding it above his heart. "Hear that? As long as that beats, I'll love you."

His face is stern for just a moment, not having fully processed his words. As soon as his words sink in, his face slowly goes red. I let out a small laugh as our hands interlock, swinging side by side in between the chairs we sat on. Donnie had pulled the strings of his hoodie tight, covering his face as he sank into his chair. I squeeze his hand lightly, grinning at the sight. His head shakes a bit, loosening the strings so he could look at me once more. His face is much less flustered now, his cheeks only slightly tinged in color. He clears his throat, looking into my eyes and squeezing my hand back. "As cheesy as that was, my point still stands. I don't want you thinking like that. You may not be as good as me yet, but I truly believe you can catch up soon. If you want to, that is. Plus, you’re much better at other things than I am. I can’t talk to people like you can, and you’re much more in tune with your emotions.”

I look at him, smiling warmly at his words. “Thank you,” I say sincerely, squeezing his hand once more before letting him go. "I really needed that."

Donnie puffs out his chest proudly, beaming. “Of course! This just proves I am the superior boyfriend! Now if you could just let me record you saying that so I could shove it in Leo's face, I would be very appreciative." His words hold a small tease in them, a smug smile on his proud maw. His face softens again, patting the arms of his chair. “I am going to ask you to talk to me more often about this, okay? I don’t need you thinking I’m going to leave you just because you can’t keep up with me tech wise. Do you understand?"

I nod, sighing. I pull my knees to my chest in the chair, puffing out my cheeks. "Yeah, that's fine. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. You told me what was wrong, and now it's going to get fixed. I have no reason to be mad." He turns back to his code, pulling my chair closer to his. He starts to type again, settling back into his own little world, me by his side. I lean on the desk once more, watching him instead of the screen. His eyes were focused, lighten up by both his own mind

and by the light of the screen in front of him. I could see the reflection of the code in his iris', lines upon lines being written in mere moments. My eyes close, a large smile on my face as I settle my head in my arms.

“I love you.” I mumble out, starting to fall asleep to the soothing tapping of his keyboard. My heart flutters in joy when I hear his response.

"I love you too, you dum dum. Go to sleep, I'll be here when you wake."

[moonlightspencie]

never thought i’d meet you here

Part 3 of ‘the sweetest con’

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x fem!Reader

Word Count: 1.2k

A/N: flashback chapter!!

<- PART TWO

Thinking back, I should have known she would be nothing but trouble for me. Her first day was enough to prove she would bring something very unique to the table. I certainly didn’t expect it to fully captivate me.

I heard a knock at the door, looking up to see a new face.

“Agent Hotchner?”

Her voice was quiet, but without the presence of nerves I’d usually hear in a stranger. Especially somebody who knew they were coming into the unit against my better wishes.

“Yes,” I stood, “You’re Agent Y/N, I presume?”

She smiled, walking further into the room and reaching out a hand.

“I am. It’s good to finally meet you,” she said, shaking my hand. “I know you’re probably a bit on edge considering I’m coming in without your say-so. I will say, however, that regardless of what Strauss says, if you feel that I’m not right for the team then I will gracefully bow out. She can’t really tell you no if I make the decision, right?”

She laughed, though I couldn’t quite tell if she was really joking or trying to catch me in some type of trap.

“I’m sorry?”

She finally dropped the hand that I didn’t realize was still holding onto her.

“I’ve known Strauss for a while, she’s kind of been a mentor of sorts. But that also means I know she’s always up your ass and that she’s kind of throwing me at you right now. I want you to know that you can still have the final say about me being here.”

“I appreciate that.”

She smiled again. “Great. So, have you had the chance to look over my file? Otherwise, I can give you the rundown.”

“I have looked it over, yes,” I said, a little rattled by just how forward she was. I moved to sit behind my desk, inviting her to sit down as well. “I’m impressed, I won’t lie. You’ve accomplished quite a lot for someone who joined the bureau two years ago.”

“Erin may be a hard-ass but she’s told me what I need to do to be a good agent, and frankly, it’s worked,” she said, then sighed softly. “I also grew up in a family that valued hard work. I try to operate on the mindset that I can learn to accomplish anything if I put in the work.”

“I’m glad to hear it. The BAU operates a little differently than most of the units here.”

“I’m aware. Trust me, I’ve done my homework on what this unit works to accomplish, and how it gets done. Even when it goes outside of the lines of what the higher-ups want,” she said, a small smile betraying her.

I found myself smiling back. “I’m sure you’ve gotten an earful about me.”

“Not enough to make me dislike you. If anything, hearing that you’re able to piss her off that often only makes me like you more.”

I let out a chuckle, appreciating the honesty, though still not used to it spilling out so easily from somebody I don’t know.

“Well, if you’re ready, I’d like to introduce you to the team,” I said, standing.

What I didn’t say was that I knew they’d love her. I couldn’t have been more right. She settled into the flow of the team as easily as if she’d been there the whole time. It probably helped that she was coming in around the same time as Elle, so they could support one another as new agents. She made fast friends with Reid, helping him to feel seen as a young agent. Obviously Morgan was fast to flirt, but even Gideon took her in quickly.

The thing that shocked me about her presence on the team is that of all the people she could focus on being friends with, she set her sights on me.

“Hotch,” she called out from the elevator, stopping me from opening the doors do the bullpen. “News on baby Hotchner?”

I laughed. Since he was born, she asked for daily updates as if much would change from day to day.

“Same as yesterday. Crying, sleeping, pooping, and eating.”

“Don’t forget the smiling. I’ve seen that kid a few times now, and he’s always smiling,” she noted.

“See? You don’t even have to ask, you already know,” I said, opening the door for her.

She walked ahead. “What if something changes? Then I’ll be behind the times”

“Right,” I nodded. “Haley says thank you for the new blanket, by the way.”

“Of course. The second I found out she was pregnant I started on the knitting. Every baby I know gets a little handmade present.”

“It’s still very kind,” I affirmed, then turned towards my office. “I’ll see you later.”

“Bye,” she waved, immediately running over to talk to the group that sat around Reid’s desk.

It was well over a year later when I realized I might have a problem on my hands. Between her knowing me well enough to spot when I was down, and the fact that I didn’t want to talk about it outright, her usual kindness was laid on thick. It wouldn’t usually phase me for her to bring me a coffee or give me a hug.

For some reason, though, on one cold day the coffee she brought tasted extra sweet and the hug she gave me was warmer than ever.

My heart started beating harder.

I panicked, quickly putting distance between us when she let go. Physically, I stood back behind my desk. Mentally, I tried to ignore it all the best I could for months.

Then, in the middle of a suspension and a possible job transfer, Haley got a call. I’d already been suspicious that something was happening behind my back. It certainly didn’t help when I answered the phone, and the caller hung up only for a call to immediately go to her personal cell. It didn’t take much to figure out what was happening from that point on. I pushed it off for the time being, booking it to Milwaukee with Prentiss in tow.

“What are you doing here?” Y/N asked me immediately, concern on her face. “Not that I’m not happy to see you, but—“

“It’s a long story.”

“Last I heard, Haley wanted you to transfer.”

“She does.”

“Then, again, what are you doing here?”

I sighed. “I can’t leave this team.”

“We’re talking about this later, you know?”

I smirked. “I know.”

She grilled me for everything when we finally talked that night, but ultimately supported my decision. It felt like a weight off my shoulders to have someone affirm my choice, even if she thought it was kind of stupid on the marriage front.

Now that I see it for what it is, that might have been the moment I realized I couldn’t run from what I felt for her. I knew I had to get over it, but denial was doing nothing. She’d somehow worked her way into being an essential part of my life. Worse, she started making a home in my heart that I really should have torn down as soon as possible.

NEXT PART ->

[aletterinthenameofsanity]

This Rotten Work Has Been Published!

Do you like Carry On or NBC's Community? Do you like messy lesbians in an enemies-to-lovers dynamic? Do you want to know what happens to Chosen Ones after they defeat their villain? Do you wish for a version of Harry Potter that isn't transphobic, homophobic, antisemitic, and racist? (Did you enjoy the seventy million fics I wrote about the mentors coping with the aftermath of the Hunger Games?) Do you like messy background poly bisexuals?

Well, here it is, y'all: all of the edits are done and my book baby has been published! Rachel and Daiyu are finally here for y'all to meet! I'm ordering my own copies now (and will definitely update y'all with photos when they arrive, especially now that I can get a photo with BOTH of my books), but for now, I just wanted to give y'all the link so you can check it out. I'm going to put the blurb below to those who are confused as to what this might be!

Amazon.com: This Rotten Work: 9798879537734: Jenkins, Kenna: Books

The moment Chosen One Rachel Barsky finally kills her magical high school’s evil Headmaster, she’s out. No pressure, no politics, and certainly no more death tournaments for her. She ditches the Magical Realm for a far more chill Normie community college with her two best friends, determined to finally get some blessed peace and quiet—maybe even a good nap. It’s what she deserves after giving up her teenage years to a prophecy that nearly killed her more times than she can count.

But of course Rachel can’t catch a break. Her first day of classes, tragedy arrives on campus in the form of Daiyu Nightbane, Rachel’s archrival and the annoyingly attractive daughter of the now-dead Headmaster. Daiyu’s acting suspiciously normal, Rachel is pissed, and her friends are preaching forgiveness and peace. What gives?

Rachel expects to have to grit her teeth and soldier through the annoyance of her rival haunting her early retirement, but she quickly learns that expectations are never made to last. After an explosive duel that ends up with one of them knocked off of their feet, Rachel is forced to see a kinder side of Daiyu than she ever glimpsed during high school.

Over a school year filled with Shakespeare, lightning magic, and quite a lot of kosher BBQ, Rachel finds herself toppling head-over-heels into an unlikely romance with her rival while she struggles with nightmares, grief, and lingering questions from her high school years. Is it possible to finally make a life for herself? Can the Chosen One really have a happy ending with the golden girl that ruled the school?

---

And to all those who have been following this saga (or liked my fics with similar premises/themes), I think I've managed to gather all of your usernames here for the official publishing!

[thoughtfullyrainynightmare]

Hello! Can I have a Matchup with a Male please for the event? I'm a 24-year-old straight female who uses she/her. I’m an INFP Libra sun sign with a 9w1 enneagram. I’m a very spacey and forgetful individual who tends to stay more indoors but tries to welcome new experiences wherever I go. I’m the kind of person who remains quiet until I become close with someone then I’m free to be a dork. Building relationships with others isn’t something I pursue unless it occurs naturally. When it comes to my health, sometimes I view myself as limited because of my disease even when that is not true. I worry that I’m too much for people when it comes to my passions. I try to make jokes or sassy comebacks, but I'm not that clever when it comes to that. I second-guess myself a lot too, but I usually push that aside and dive into whatever my choice was. I’ve also been described as generous, childish, excitable, playful, mischievous, stubborn, and imaginative. I may not know how bad situations can get but I always try to bring comfort to other people. Plus, I want to improve my health by getting physically fit. Currently, I'm hoping to find work as a librarian. My love language is a tie between physical touch and quality time! I love the idea of cuddling in bed with my partner as we exchange kisses. I might also like words of affirmation, but I have a hard time accepting praise. As for my giving love language, I think it would be acts of service because I want to be both a strong partner for them and do little things to ease their mind.

Likes: Drawing, designing costumes, walking, animals, soft blankets, notebooks, the smell of home-baked food and a campfire, going somewhere new, the supernatural, true crime, animated movies, cosplay, anime/cartoons, sweets, working in archives, libraries, friends, and family.

Dislikes: Rude disrespectful people, loud noises like fireworks, my personal space being invaded, narcissists. People who don’t value others.

I hope this isn’t too much information. Sorry in advance if it is.📚

Hello!

I thought of a few characters, but as a matchmaker I would set you on a blind date with...

William Vangeance

William is a quiet, gentle person despite being a Magic Knight captain. And he is a deeply empathetic person despite his crimes; in fact, it was his nature that tries to understand others that ultimately contributed to him not being able to choose between his friend (Patri) and his mentor (Julius). Though the situation was complex and nuanced, he doesn't claim that he wasn't in the wrong, but felt deep gratitude to Julius for giving him another chance.

He is also a little bit shy and awkward when it comes to personal relations. As a knight and a captain? He can work around that paradigm without an issue, but when it comes to opening up to a person about who he is himself, as William, that is more difficult.

He's also able to understand feeling restricted because of a condition, because his scar has left a mark on him, and he does harbour insecurities about it still. So, he'd very much appreciate if his spouse would understand that aspect of life as well. That it's not always that easy.

His childhood didn't also allow much for mischief or being playful, so a spouse who can be a little bit quirky around him and with who he can learn to be a little bit silly, will bring light to his soul. He also enjoys spending time in the garden, and has bird feeders around, so that there are always animals around the base as companions, but despite of it he's not exactly an outdoors-y person, but prefers to stay inside.

The library and archives of the Golden Dawn would be at your disposal, because he'd like to make your time there as comfortable as possible. He is very much about giving and providing, especially now that he is in a position to do so. And partially because he knows that he has done wrong, he'd appreciate a spouse who can help him see the bright side of the situation.

As a way of showing his affection, he'd pick up poetry to try and give you words of affirmation that you deserve. Because he doesn't want a day go by where you don't know just how much he loves and cares for you.

William would be a soft person who'd try to work around your boundaries and what you're comfortable with, while trying to figure out how to express himself in the beginning. But once things get rolling, you'd see just how caring and gentle he can be. Sometimes it is similarities that attract, though you do have some differences between yourselves as well to mix things up ;)

[violetlunette]

Horrortober Day 28: Mercy

Okay, this is actually going to be a sneak peek to my Diasomnia Family Fanfic called, "Phantom Slayer" (working title).

It's A Demon Slayer AU where Lilia's been turned into a Phantom (demon) and Silver becomes a Slayer with Sebek and Malleus to save him. I hope you enjoy it!

Silver awoke to his head throbbing in agony. Groaning, he slowly opened his eyes and blinked at his surroundings.

Silver instantly recognized that he was in the Zigvolt home. He had spent so much time here as a child that he knew it as well as his own. He was in Sebek’s room from the look of it as there were images of Malleus everywhere.

‘By why am I here…?’

“Silver!” Silver flinched at the familiar volume and tone that appeared at his side, accompanied by the sound of a chair falling over. He turned his head and saw Sebek staring down at him, eyes watering as his whole body shook.

“Sebek?” Sebek sniffed, wiping his face with his sleeve as he spoke.

“You idiot… idiot!” he said with a stuffy voice. “We all thought… you and your damned sleep spells!” Silver frowned slightly and opened his mouth to ask what was wrong when it all came flooding back in horrible flashes.

The first was the fire that destroyed his home, followed by finding his father severely injured, nearly cut in half. The next was Silver desperately running with the fae on his back to get help. This memory came with the image of Lilia becoming a Phantom and trying to tear his throat out and eat him. Malleus then appearing with his long blade to kill Lilia, his father--!!

Silver bolted upright and grabbed the other, ignoring the protest of his injured body, which was wrapped tightly in gauze.

“Sebek! Where’s father?!” he demanded. Sebek’s eyes filled with tears, and for the first time since Silver knew him, he was speechless. When the teen spoke, Sebek choked on the words.

“Master Lilia… He’s… He’s…” Silver’s heart filled in terror.

He shoved Sebek aside and leaped from the bed, running through the house.

“Father! Father!” he called, growing more desperate with each word as the events from last night played in his head, over and over.

‘He can’t be… He can’t… HE CAN’T!’

“Silver.” A familiar voice cut through his panic and brought him to reality. Silver turned to see Malleus, a tear escaping his eye.

Malleus was injured, as Silver could see the bandages around his chest, neck, and head. His arm had been placed in a sling and bruises covered his fair skin. The man’s eyes were downcast and filled with shame as he pressed his lips into a thin line. He didn’t do anything, but Silver still approached him.

He felt very small and very fearful. Like a lost child alone in the world. Nausea built in his stomach and he felt as if he was going to throw up.

Once he stood before Malleus, he stopped.

“...Where’s father?” he questioned, his voice very quiet as each word cracked. Malleus looked away. Silver felt as if a sinkhole appeared in his stomach. He didn’t know what he would have done next if another voice hadn’t spoken.

“Silver.”

Silver looked past Malleus and saw Baul, who sat at a table, a large bottle of wine in his hand. He poured himself a cup.

“Sit,” the old soldier ordered. “We need to talk.” Silver didn’t move.

He stared at the adults with wide eyes. His throat was dry, and his lips shook as he opened them.

“Where’s—where’s father?” It pained Silver to ask the question as he feared what the answer would be. It seemed the answer was obvious. His father had become a Phantom, and Malleus was a Phantom Slayer. It wasn’t too much to imagine the man cutting Lilia down, spilling his blood before he had the chance to kill others. Even if the Phantom in question was his mentor and friend. That was what the job was about, after all.

Yet even so, there was a flicker of hope in Silver’s heart that maybe, just maybe, Malleus had shown mercy to the man who helped raise both of them despite everything he had been taught.

“Malleus…” he said in a tone that pleaded for an answer of reassurance yet dreading the grim answer that may come instead. Two eyes of green flame looked from beneath tasseled black locks and looked at him. His face was as still and emotionless as a porcelain doll as he met Silver’s eyes.

What happened to his father? Did Malleus show mercy and spared the fae? Or was the mercy he showed cold as the corpse that may lay somewhere in the woods?

Silver held his breath and waited for an answer.

--

And that's it for now! I hope you'll all read the full fic when it comes out!

[goldenlevi]

note: ok, so i posted it here properly. if you prefer to read it on ao3 here other works: here / i hope you enjoy, happy new year everyone

A loud sound in the distance woke you up.

Unsure of what it was exactly, as you were still groggy with sleep, a yawn escaped your lips while your arms stretched in front of you. For a moment, you thought you were back at your apartment and not in a public library.

Right.

You should be studying, not sleeping. The fault wasn’t entirely yours though. The previous day, you were stuck inside the Hospital following your mentor for the next six months which forced you to spend the night studying for an upcoming exam that was draining you. That’s how you end up in the library today next to Chishiya.

He was supposed to be helping you, and vice versa, not letting you fall asleep on top of dusty books. You looked down, as a frown took over your face. Why the fuck are they dusty? And where the hell was he? Your head turned in search for the blond. It only took a couple of seconds to notice that the setting was not exactly right.

It was the same familiar library, sure, one that you’ve set foot in many times. The same one in which you even met Chishiya in. But in spite of that, uneasiness was all you felt.

Too quiet, you thought. No traffic sounds were heard, no sighs from tired students nor any fingers pressing on keyboards in a hurry. Your legs moved before you could tell them to and practically jogged to the nearest windows. Just as you thought…empty streets. That is impossible, a voice inside your head argued. Shibuya doesn’t equal to empty streets nor any form of quiet. In fact, it was the exact opposite.

This had to be some type of illusion… a dream! yeah! You were still dreaming, it’s not like you were a stranger to lucid dreams and it would explain why you’re all alone. Well done, you pat yourself in the back.

“I know what you’re thinking; it’s not a dream” Your boyfriend’s voice rang through the room, another reminder of the silence. He cuts your train of thought off utterly unbothered. “There’s no one here” He says, beginning to walk over in your direction.

You turned your back to the windows, following his voice. You click your tongue, “That’s exactly what dream you would say. Even in my head you argue with me” He rolls his eyes upon hearing the answer your brain decides to come up with. Yet, until this day they still held a slightly less harsh stare as soon as he takes you in. His little smirk however, doesn’t flatter.

“Hmm” Your eyes barely have time to register his fingers as they quickly flick your forehead. Once and then again.

“Ouch! You asshole” You slap his hand away, rubbing your forehead. “Ok, fine I see your point”

🃏🃏🃏

Your eyes scanned your surroundings, not quite knowing what to make of it. Where were you? Both of you walked through the streets, ultimately deciding to go to your apartment since it was closer.

Everything felt…off. “What is this place?” Even then, your voice sounded foreign to your own ears. It was truly like you had been sucked out of your own reality and placed in a mirrored version of your world.

“Tokyo”

You rolled your eyes. Idiot.

“I'm serious. It may look like it but it doesn’t seem like we’re there anymore” Each time your eyes picked on something new, more and more questions followed.

“Dorothy~ I have a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore” he said playfully in your ear. Knowing that he was trying to make you feel more relaxed about the situation you both found yourselves in; you couldn’t help but smile. Chishiya was always playful, at least to you. Others generally seemed not being able to get past the arrogance and coldness. It wasn’t that they were making an incorrect assumption, only a superficial one.

“How long do you think has it been?” He asked while taking a look around the familiar place you used to call home.

“At least a month, I'm sure of it. I don’t know how though...this feeling of uncertainty — I don’t like it” You then noticed a few items that were out of place. “Someone’s been here” Your voice slightly raised as slow burning agitation filled your body.

The feeling of invasion of privacy was a foreign one. One you didn't know how to deal with just yet. People have been inside your house - messing with your things who knows what they could have taken? What could they have seen?

From the library to your apartment, if you could still call it that, you didn’t hear a sound. However, he pointed out stores that had been broken into, cars left in the middle of the street and so on..

If there’s really people out there, being able to enter anywhere and everywhere, if there’s no one to stop them…then…what else could they been doing?

That same night, while walking aimlessly through familiar streets that no longer held any attachment, you both spot bright lights coming out of a building. At the same time, your bodies turned to each other and spoke without words.

In less than a mere five minutes, those same bright lights stared at you seemingly mocking you. Curiosity filled you from the moment you had woken up and now you suspect some of it was going to be satisfied.

One hour later you found yourself staring at the same piece of paper together.

A small one with a bold title of ‘VISA’ right in the center of it. Immigration status Certificate.

What the- Better yet how did these people know your names, and how did they just decide to attribute points to the game you had just played.

“Valid until Monday. Hm, I wonder what fate awaits if a person lets it expire” He mused. His eyes glanced at you in anticipation.

“We just played a game where four people died just because they made the wrong choice. What do you think happens?” You asked rhetorically, arching your eyebrows.

“Ah yes. I just wanted to hear you say that you’ll continue playing” He shrugged, crushing the paper, letting it fall on the floor.

A teenager that survived alongside you both, shared all the information they knew. Apparently, this place was called Boderland. The amount of people who were actively there participating in the games was unknown.

The black haired teenager looked at the two of you as if they were waiting for a new answer.

“All of us saw fireworks before we got here. Did-did you guys see them too?” You almost felt bad at how their voice shook, clearly longing for new information that could help figure out this surely long puzzle.

They confirmed that in order to survive, everyone was forced to play the games. But, you could also die in them. You weren't certain how long they had been there. The only certainty you had so far was that not many people would view the challenges as you and Chishiya did.

You shook your head with a small smile. “Did you?” They asked Chishiya. He stared at them before answering, contemplating if he should answer truthfully or not. He concluded they seemed harmless and so he said, “I heard them at first, then saw them through the windows” He explained no further.

In addition, you also learned that the games take place each evening and it could happen anywhere. Each game had their own set of rules, making them highly unpredictable. The one thing they had in common was the fact the symbols had a meaning and you could gain information if you paid enough attention.

“Clubs are team based games, you can generally win them with teamwork. Spades: Mostly physical as they test your endurance” They paused. “Diamonds, well, those are made for testing intelligence, and problem-solving skills. The hardest one is Hearts. Hearts have no limits,they test everything, attack you physiologically and easily manipulate you”

“Sounds fun” You hear him say under his breath, resulting in you discreetly lightly pinching his side. Last thing you need is the only person kind enough to give you any type of explanation to think you’re nuts.

After that first game, they decided not to play the second one together. It would be risky since you wouldn’t have the means to know what type of game it would be beforehand. If they had to let lives end in exchange of their own, then there’s no reason why they should complicate it even further.

🎲🎲

Sunday Evening

You had just cleared a game.

The wind hit your hair as you ran, your feet moved one after the other without guidance, as the adrenaline remained in your veins being pumped through your blood stream.

Suddenly your eyes became hyper aware of the surroundings and you found yourself exactly in the spot you previously had agreed to meet Chishiya.

There he was, leaning on the empty store’s front wearing a blank expression as he often did. His eyes were dark as night, observing everything that moved.

You stopped beside him; leaning backwards allowing your head to hit the wall while a breathy laugh escaped your lips. “Fuck” you swore nearly panting. “Can you believe this? This is incredible. Whoever designed this, got a lot of inspiration from Saw”

“Saw?” He repeated, arching an eyebrow. You nodded, smiling wide just for him.

Chishiya turned his head towards you, searching for any possible injuries. Only after making sure you were physically unharmed, did relief fill him. Even now, it still felt like a strange feeling for the blond.

He then chuckled shaking his head in disbelief, “When the game ended, I was scared of one thing,” he placed one hand on his girlfriend’s cheek pulling you towards him. His mouth ghosted yours, teasing you as it always does. “that you wouldn’t find this as much fun as I did”

He pressed his lips against yours, speaking through a simple kiss. A pressing kiss, which screamed euphoria. He was happy that, once again, you found mutual pleasure.

Chishiya wouldn’t say it, nevertheless it wouldn’t be untrue, but he couldn’t bear to lose you. So, he spoke through his mouth right on yours grabbing you by the waist while biting your bottom lip teasingly. He decided that if he made all the right decisions he could have it all. And he would make sure of it.

Your hands met his neck touching him possessively. With nails grazing his skin, you deepened the kiss. Your tongue met his slowly wanting to taste him all of him.

Kissing him always felt too good. But something in the adrenaline and in the strange land made it feel fucking fantastic.

A week ago you were studying for an exam, today you had just fought for your life in a place where nothing matters. You decided right there and then you would rather live through a hundred todays especially if by the end of it, you got to have a kiss like that.

Their hearts pounded memories of the game they had just played behind their eyelids.His knuckles tightened around her clothes. And he kissed her like he wanted to scream he felt free.

Unprecedentedly, he was free.

[flimflamfandom]

Okay I guess I gotta do a LackaSona!

That sounds more dismissive than it really should - truth is, I've had an idea for one sitting around in the back of my head and frankly I dunno why I never put it down (probably too busy ranting about Frepper and such)

I cannot draw and I haven't got the funds to attract an artist. So you'll have to picture him in your mind's eye! Which I'm sure we can do.

BELOW THE CUT: The past, present, and more, of luthier and multi-instrumentalist ARTHUR KEANE!

BACKGROUND

ARTHUR KEANE was born August 16th, 1904, in Virginia Beach, Virginia. Living a mostly quiet life as the son of a violinist and vocal teacher, Arthur was the youngest of 3 siblings, and was always a bit small and sickly as a child. Because of this, most of his schooling was done at home - his mother taught him to read and write, and his aunt (a school teacher, who lived just down the street) helped with the trickier bits.

His parents taught him to love music, but his aunt taught him to love guitar.

She was a virtuoso on the instrument, practically - she played it, banjo, mandolin, just about any fretted instrument you put in her hands, she could play it. And she did, indeed, teach him just about everything he knew from an early age!

PRESENT DAY

Just like today, it was hard to find work as a guitarist - bands were getting louder and louder each passing year, and there were many limits on the bandstand. So, to chase his dream of making money on the instrument, he shipped himself all the way across the country to St. Louis, Missouri, to apprentice for a local luthier (a maker and repairer of string instruments).

These, in 1928, Arthur is well known, and still works for his mentor, Mr. Boggs. Arthur plays regularly in clubs and speakeasies when they'll have him, and is even building his own instruments - he's even built himself a new fangled, state-of-the-art resonator, like those Dopyera brothers out in California!

HOW'S THE FELLA LOOK?

As he stands, he's fairly average - He has solid cinnamon fur, big brown eyes, and stands about Rocky's height. Maybe an inch or two taller.

He wears round glasses, and normally just plain work clothes, like blue chambray shirts (he lives by those) and plain slacks and shoes - when he gigs, of course, he dresses up (he does have an all black suit he wears) but typically he's got some sort of denim on, and often forgets to remove his leather apron full of tools. He wears a flat cap.

He has one spot that's out of the ordinary - his left ear is cut about halfway down its length. This is due to an accident while playing when he was young - it's a sore spot.

ARTHUR AND THE GANG

Arthur gets along well with the Lackadaisy group, if only because once after a gig at the Marigold he was stiffed 50 cents for 'running long'. He works at other speakeasies in town though, and doesn't participate in any illegal business...there was that one time he technically became an accessory by telling Rocky which why a truck came by but that's one time!

Arthur, in truth, is a very soft hearted man - he could hardly be convinced to do something like CRIME. He's just a quiet man who likes his instruments. And Lacy Hardt.

He really likes Lacy Hardt.

-

That's about all there is to Arthur Keane! He WILL be getting written about soon!!! I think.

I hope. (I've got a busy end of the year.)

[edogawa-division]

ARB Birthday Special 2023: Yuriko Kuromiya

~~ December 22nd ~~

“Death is not the opposite of life, but a part of it.”

Login Lines:

“Forgive me, I’m a bit too busy to stay and have a chat. So please make it quick.”  

“A gift for me? Christmas isn’t for another few days…hm? It’s for my birthday, oh it appears I forgot all about it again. Thank you for reminding me.”

Voice Lines:

“Once again, it seems like my birthday has come around and surprised me. I suppose that I never truly celebrated it growing up, so it makes sense that I would forget all about it. Of course, nowadays I have two gremlins who love to celebrate it for me.”  

“35 years old…goodness if you had told me 15 years ago that I’d reach this age I would’ve laughed in your face. …Father’s death sent me spiraling so badly that I took job after job, each one more dangerous than the last. A small, dark part of my mind hoped that one of them would do me in. *chuckles softly* Yet here I am still alive and a mother to boot.” 

“Several of my old mentors called today to wish me a Happy Birthday. Some of them even sent gifts surprisingly. None of them could be said to be the most generous of people. Master assassins aren’t usually the type.” 

“It’s been oddly peaceful lately with no sort of trouble coming from either Kaoru or Kanra. *sighs* Why does that stress me out more than if they were causing chaos? Goodness, I never thought I’d appreciate being born with white hair. I just know that if I had any other color I’d be going gray early.”  

“Speaking of going gray early, You’ve been surprisingly quiet, Kaoru, not even a peep coming from inside your lab, something that is extremely unusual coming from you. So I ask what have you done? …Kaoru, the words “hidden project” do not give me a sense of comfort. Don’t believe giving me a gift is going to distract me. We’re coming back to this Kaoru.” 

“Oh, this is quite elegant, Kaoru. You made this? …What did you do? Only you would turn a watch into a deadly defibrillator, Kaoru, but you do know I don't exactly need it to be dangerous? I suppose I’ll add it to the other “tricks” I have up my sleeve then.” 

“There you are, Kanra. You’ve been pretty quiet recently as well. Want to explain to me where you’ve been? Uh, huh, something tells me you’ve been doing more than that. Oh? Let’s see it then. I can only imagine what you got me to spend so much time saving up money for.”   

“Kanra, where did you even get this? Let alone even afford this?! Even at their cheapest, these still run a person $10,000 easily. You’ve been doing what? That is extremely dangerous, and you could’ve gotten hurt. The point is Kanra, you shouldn’t be fighting anyone for money, let alone in a cage fighting ring. You’re not getting off the hook that easily. You’re grounded, Kanra.”

Kaoru Lines:

“Happy Birthday Yuriko…what do you mean? Oh, so just because I was quiet, that means I did something. Well, if you must know, I've been working on a project of mine hidden on the coast of Edogawa’s portion of Tokyo Bay. Don’t worry about it, Yuriko, but if it makes you feel better, I was working on this for you, too.”  

“You bet I did, and guess what? You know my Spider Bites, right? They function pretty similarly. Just press the dial on the side, and it fires a dart that delivers an electrical shock strong enough to disrupt the cardiac system. I know you don’t need any weapons to be dangerous, but better safe than sorry. Think of it as a hidden trick up your sleeve no one will ever expect!”

Kanra Lines:

“Happy Birthday, Yuriko-san! Oh, just out and about, you know. *smiles* I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’ve just been here finishing up your birthday cake. Anyway, I got you something for your birthday! It took me a while to save up for it, but I managed to get you this!” 

“Well about that…I might have spent the last few weeks in an illegal cage-fighting ring. What? Not like any of them could ever beat me! Fine, I’ll stop going out to do cage fighting for money. Now let’s have some of the cake I made you! ...Fuck.”

[ae-neon]

Disclaimer: this is embarrassing but I once shipped Nesta and Rhysand. HEAR ME OUT

I'm not a Feysand and Nessian fan and in particular I think they work better as separate characters. BUT THIS ISN'T BECAUSE I USED TO SHIP NxR, I read with an open mind and take things as they are so this wasn't any kind of weird ship jealousy

Rhysand was never a good guy but before the nauseating retcon/whitewash of ACOMAF, I thought he was interesting.

Obviously by the end of ACOTAR, sjm had already set the seeds for the ship switch from FeyLin to FeySand. But I was a newbie to sjm and had no idea the fuckery she was gonna use to do this.

Still, between MAF and TAR I was left to think of how things might go and I heard enough of other people's opinions and reactions to know that Rhys was gonna become a sort of dark "hero"

Now I'm not against enemies to lovers, but only in the instance that the enemies isn't a super personal element : to clarify I mean if the characters personally enact violence on one another - it's a no from me.

Also I don't really like super edgy characters so Feyre being a brutal survivalist and Nesta being a bitch was just enough for both of them to fit the sort of girlboss trend but not overdo it into Strong Female Character territory.

Now by the end of TAR, Nesta was already the character I was most looking forward to even if I didn't actively think of her as my favourite. I thought her ability to negate(?) the glamour of a HL was gonna mean something, I thought Nesta going out to the wall to get her sister back was gonna mean something, I thought Feyre and Nesta rekindling and making up was gonna mean something, I thought their nameless parents and the three sisters reflecting aspects of pagan goddesses was gonna mean something. It didn't.

I was half reading MAF, stopping every three chapters cause my eyes hurt from how often they rolled at the over-the-topness of it all. Characters who'd been almost 3D suddenly had 2 traits we were beaten over the head with, retcons left n right and the side characters were eating the main characters up. Here's where my brain started wandering off the well laid sjm path.

So I embraced delusion. What if FeyLin didn't ignore each other's trauma? What if they had a rough patch but ultimately worked things out?

And then I started spiraling.

I kept seeing "like calls to like" stuff (no idea it was stolen?) And knew Rhysand was the most powerful HL then learned Nesta STOLE FROM THE CAULDRON.

The sister with the keen intellect and not so subtle royal descriptors and the sneakiest, most scheming HL in the book??

Nesta's unforgiving nature and unwillingness to be lenient to the Fae Vs the man who secretly hated what he'd done to protect his people??

Like forget who they are now and tell me you can't seeeee it

Nesta's want to return to an upper class life and Rhysand's (initial) aristocratic air?

She'd never let him dress or treat her the way he dressed and treated Feyre so we wouldn't have that God awful CoN, Rhysand's pet stuff.

Actual magic mentoring. Learning history and politics!!

No Illyrian culture vulture stuff but Nesta loves to learn so she'd still have been fascinated to learn about them.

Her facing and overcoming ignorance on the Fae while insisting that humans weren't wrong to be afraid.

Both of them at first pushing the other to confront who they are and what they've done but also building a strange intimacy when they realise the other truly knows and sees them and still thinks they can and will do whatever it takes to save as many people as possible

Quiet nights in his private library where they realise they don't hate each other's company

Less emphasis on training and more on the politics between the Mortal Lands, the Continent, the Courts and Hybern

The potential left me breathless.

[Please don't argue with me in the comments. I let this go long ago and I promise I'm not a threat to your literally cannon ships😭]