#even if they would be older than me if they were real

[xynqn]

I come to this from a weird angle, because I've always looked younger than I am, for various reasons, and I used to be super crazy insecure about it - which I've recently realised was an expression of gender dysphoria. I hated my body, my face, I looked like a girl or a child. All this stuff. People would think I was my older sister's daughter, or my partner's little brother. I'd gone through female puberty but still felt like I moved through the world prepubescently. I also had zero libido and zero connection to my body, so in many ways my dysphoria was expressed as a desire to return to childhood, because what had puberty given me? Boobs I didn't want and a disabling period.

The idea was, the three genders were "men, women, and children," which, I still think there's a grain of truth to that? But it felt like the only way to be "non-binary" was to be a child. This "transition goal" (by which I mean passing as a child) was both within my reach and something I hated for being within my reach. Side note: I think these ideas are part of why the stereotypical non-binary person is a skinny white androgynous (i.e., lightly masc) pixie.

Now I'm going through my second puberty, and it feels right that I've done both estrogen and testosterone puberties -- genderqueer, even. It does mean I'm fatter, so a lot of my old stylish clothes don't fit me anymore, plus I have a dry pussy and a micropenis. I've lost a lot of my desirable womanly qualities. I'm not much of a masculine man either, being weaker than before I started HRT. But none of that matters because, for me, letting go of womanhood meant letting go of beauty. I don't have to be beautiful if I look like myself. Transition is an act of pursuing yourself above everything else. Who the fuck cares if I look old and ugly and fat and hairy, because I'm finally a real person.

A majority of the fears of transition strike me as ultimately being fears of aging. You don't want to get bald, you don't want your boobs sagging, you don't want to get bigger, you don't want your back to get hairy, you hate that rather than resembling an anime character you will look like your dad or your mom. you're afraid of losing fertility, you're afraid of losing skin elasticity, you're afraid of losing hard-ons or vaginal moisture, you don't want to lose muscle you don't want to lose flexibility, you think people will no longer be attracted to you, you fear something will happen to your body from which you can never turn back, and most of all you fear the inevitable winnowing down of life options that actually occurs for all people as time advances, whether they make a decision about themselves or not.

what else have i forgotten here? especially curious on trans feminine perspectives on this (whether they converge with or diverge from or merely complicate what i am saying). this is for a piece

[scary-grace]

omg Hana lives au where you’re in her group for a project and keep suggesting studying at her house. You say it’s because she has a library but actually you just think her brother’s cute.

You sent this ask and my brain started clicking, so here is a Hana (and Mon) lives ficlet, ft. a reader who’s lying about her quirk.

“Again?” Hana asks. She heaves a dramatic sigh and flops down over her desk. “We always study at my house.”

“Your house is nicer,” Yue says.

“You have a library and a bunch of pretty windows,” Manami says. “And your backyard is so nice! If the weather’s good we can study outside.”

All of what your friends are saying is true. Hana has the nicest house by far, and the most books you can borrow, but you’re not going to join in the guilt-trip. Hana picks her head up and glances your way. “You’re not going to say anything?”

You can’t. It’ll look suspicious. “I’m fine with wherever,” you say.

“No you’re not,” Yue says, and elbows you. Her elbows are really pointy. “You want to go over to Hana’s too. Say it.”

“Okay, okay,” you say. Maybe not going along with it looks more suspicious than going along with it would. “We have to go over to yours, Hana. Mon loves me, and I promised to go back see him soon.”

“Mon does really like you,” Hana admits. “Better than me. The only person he likes more is Tenko.”

“Is he going to be around?” you ask as casually as possible. “Tenko?”

“Yeah. Why?”

That settles it. You’re going to Hana’s to study if you have to climb over the back fence and study in the grass. “Just figuring out how many snacks to bring. If you’re hosting, I’m bringing food.”

Manami and Yue renew their attack on Hana. “She has a cooking quirk. People pay for her stuff and we get it for free. Come on, Hana —“

Hana heaves an even more dramatic sigh than before, but you can see her smiling slightly. “Fine. My house tomorrow at noon.”

Manami and Yue are grinning, pleased, but you feel a knot of anticipation pulling tight in your chest. You like going to Hana’s, sure, and you love seeing Mon. But you’d rather fail every class between now and graduation than admit to Hana that the reason you always want to study at her place is that you have a crush on her little brother.

You’re not that much older than Tenko is — just a year or so, since you’re a grade ahead in the classes you share with Hana and Yue — and if you told anybody about your crush, the age difference would be the last thing they’d comment on. Tenko can be a little intense, a little earnest, a lot awkward. When you first became friends with Hana, nobody was making him pay for it yet, but then he got to middle school, and you know he got picked on. Hana stood up for him as best she could, and so did you, if someone was mean when you were in earshot. You stood up for him before you had a crush on him. That’s not why you did it.

You’re not sure when you went from the kind of distant fondness you have for your friends’ siblings to this, but it happened, and now you’ll take any chance you get to hang out at Hana’s house. Even if it means you’ll be up all night baking, trying to make the quirk you lied about look real.

You’re at Hana’s house two minutes after noon, with your backpack and two covered trays, one with cupcakes and one with taiyaki. Hana beams. “Sorry I was weird yesterday,” she says as she ushers you inside. “I was worried my dad might try to visit.”

“Oh.” You know Hana’s parents are divorced — messily divorced, and Hana has really mixed feelings about her dad, who lives in a luxury apartment on the other side of town. “I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s good. I told him he couldn’t visit because I had friends coming over to study, so it all worked out.”

Hana lifts the trays out of your hands while you take off your shoes and goes to set them on the table. As you straighten up, you hear the sound of paws pattering across the floor. “Mon?”

Mon pounces on you, much more spry than his white-flecked muzzle would suggest, and you crouch down to greet him. You don’t have a dog of your own, but you’ve always been a dog person, and Mon’s your favorite by a mile. You tell him so. “Who’s the most handsome man? I missed you so much —“ He bounces up on his hind legs to lick your nose, and you laugh. “I promised I’d come back. You don’t have to give me that many kisses.”

“He wants you to pet him.”

That’s Tenko’s voice, and just like that, you’re nervous. You look up to find him watching you from around the corner, dark-haired and grey-eyed, halfway in the shadows. “You never pet him,” he continues. He got cuter since the last time you saw him. How is that possible? “Why not?”

“Do I have to pet him to love him?” you ask awkwardly. “He likes me anyway.”

“Yeah. A lot. But it’s weird that you don’t pet him.” Tenko scratches lightly at the side of his neck with a gloved hand. “If you’re allergic, you shouldn’t let him lick your face.”

“I’m not allergic.” You nudge Mon away, and thankfully, he defaults to sniffing your backpack, giving you an excuse to look at him instead of Tenko. “I promised I’d bring treats for you next time. Give me a second.”

“He can’t eat treats from the store. They’re bad for him.”

“I made these at home,” you say. “There are two kinds — salmon and quinoa, and carrot and cheese.“

Tenko’s quiet. You glance up at him and see a surprised look on his face. “You made him two kinds of treats?”

“I wasn’t sure what he liked best,” you admit. You take the package out of your backpack, and Mon starts slobbering all over your hands as he tries to get you to open it. “Can I give him one?”

Tenko nods, and you open the plastic bag, selecting a carrot and cheese biscuit. “Sorry I was mean,” he says quietly. “I heard Hana tell you. About our dad —“

“It’s okay,” you say. He’s so earnest about stuff. You can’t remember the last time you heard a boy apologize and really mean it. “Um, should I ask Mon to do a trick or something?”

“If you hold it up and say ‘up’ he’ll stand on his hind legs,” Tenko says, and you laugh. “Don’t make him do it for too long. He’s getting old.”

Tenko’s voice catches a little bit on the last words, and breaks your heart a little bit more. “Can he roll over?”

“Yeah. Mon, roll,” Tenko orders, and Mon flops down and log-rolls twice. “Good boy. Now he can have a treat.”

You feed Mon the carrot and cheese biscuit, which he snaps up in two bites. He must like it, because he immediately comes hunting for more. Tenko fishes around in the bag and comes up with one of the salmon biscuits, which he gives to Mon without asking for a trick first. He pets Mon with gloved hands and Mon immediately pops up, licking his cheek and snuffling his ears. Tenko laughs, a quiet, rusty sound that makes your cheeks heat up. “Don’t be dumb. There aren’t any treats in there. She has the treats.”

Watching the two of them interact, you’re amazed that more of Hana’s friends don’t have crushes on Tenko. There’s something sweet about him, something that renders any weirdness or awkwardness or itchiness irrelevant. You know he’s smart, and you think he’s cute, and the fact that he’s a year younger than you and your friend’s brother shouldn’t matter at all.

But it does matter, because when Hana calls your name, you jump out of your skin like you’ve been caught stealing from the cookie jar. “Where did you go?” she complains, then rounds the corner. “You don’t have to win Mon’s heart with treats. He already likes you second-best out of everybody.”

“He does,” Tenko agrees. He glances sideways at you, somehow managing to look up at you through his eyelashes even though you’re both the same height crouching down. “I can tell.”

You try not to blush and mostly fail, because it’s not Mon’s heart you’re trying to win. And even though you know you shouldn’t, even though you know it’s a bad idea, you reach out to pet Mon’s ears, stealing a little bit of life from yourself and passing it along to him.

[goddamnitmahtin]

How I think it would go if I ended up inside a tumbler dc x dp universe

Okay so falling through a portal into Crime Alley? Not the worst thing that’s ever happened. Definitely not the best either though. Phone? Gone. Money? Gone. Mental and emotional stability? Was gone before this ever happened. So this is fine…

The dark streets and the sun’s refusal to come out of the clouds literally ever would probably scare most people but honestly it was a nice vacation from bright light. The city itself was gods awful and hella unsafe but hey- it had aesthetic you know? The only thing that really made it hard to live here was the fact that no one wanted to hire me.

“You look like one of them Wayne kids. Don’t even bother with me. Just go back to your mansion and ask Brucie if you need cash.”

Ah. Well. I would if I actually was “one of them Wayne kids.” Alas I was not. Eventually I was rejected enough times that I started to contemplate whether or not “asking Brucie” would actually work. According to locals he seems ditzy enough and adopted more children than he could keep track of. Was it a stupid idea? Absolutely. Was I gonna try it anyways? Fuck yeah.

Anyways that’s how I ended up living in the walls of Wayne Manor for like a month.

…

To be honest? It wasn’t that hard to get in. I looked the part so to speak with black hair and blue eyes so when I hopped into the back seat of a fancy looking limo, the driver just kind of assumed? and drove me right to the manor.

It was late and it seemed like there wasn’t much staff in the house itself. Just some old butler guy that looked like he knew way too much. About what I couldn’t tell you but he had that vibe that he’s seen enough death to know when to not ask questions.

“Master Wayne?” I looked at the man. He totally knew I wasn’t supposed to be there. He had that look in his eye. But he was playing along.

“Uh yeah. I’m just gonna go grab some food real quick and then leave,” maybe if I just bounced from the joint after a meal he wouldn’t tell anyone?

The butler nodded, “I will prepare you a meal then and have it ready for you in the dining room.” Holy shit he was actually playing along for real. Okay well then.

After exploring the place a little, it seemed pretty empty at the moment, I went to the dining room and sure enough this butler guy had actually made me some food. And it was fucking good. After living on the streets for several months at this point, this was the best thing ever.

I ate as much as I could, shoveling food into my face. This was the first real meal I had been able to really eat since spawning into Gotham. Hell it was the first real meal since even before that.

After I ate as much as I could, I stole as many bread rolls I could fit into my pockets and was about to leave just like I had promised I would when I heard voices that did not belong to the butler guy.

I uh… well I didn’t make the best decision when I hopped through the wall to hide. I was expecting to find another room on the other side but no, these wall were thick and I could stand comfortably in the space between the plaster on either side of me, given I didn’t bump into a wire or two that was running along the studs.

I was planning to leave once the coast was clear but ended up passing out as the exhaustion of constantly fighting off muggers and evading goons from various villains (not me mention I hadn’t slept in nearly 72 hours) caught up with me.

After that I just kind of… forgot to leave? It was easy enough to get around the manor just inside the walls and whenever I did need to get somewhere in the manor where people could see me, I was most of the time mistaken for someone else who also lived there.

“Oh hey Dick,” said by a sleep deprived and slightly delirious man I later learned to be named Tim as he headed out one day.

“Tim go to bed,” said by a just as, if not more, sleep deprived man who was older than the rest that I figured was Bruce. He had been in the library and had seen me walk by.

I once got a wave from a blonde girl who seemed to be on a mission to get somewhere.

Only the butler who I learned was called Alfred seemed to really grasp that I was in the house at all. And I knew this because he kept leaving plates of food or cookies or even sometimes small handfuls of candies out for me to find. Sometimes he would even give the wall a little tap to tell me he left me something.

Life in the walls of Wayne Manor was alright enough. That was until I kind of… well I got bored. I figured that if I could pull off pretending to be one of them in passing and even for short conversations, why not try to up the wager a little? For fun.

So during one of the family dinners that they held together sometimes, I just kind of… sat down at the table. And started eating with everyone.

At first it was pretty easy to keep my head down and not be super noticeable. Bruce hardly looked up from his food and everyone else looked too tired to really think about how many people were actually at the table.

That was until a tank of a man walked in and sat at the table, late for the function. He reeked of death. The amount of anger and grief this guy had oozed out of him and it was honestly suffocating.

“Hey B, when did you adopt another one?” Jason asked as he sat down.

“I didn’t-?” Bruce looked up from his food and scanned the table, his eyes eventually falling on me, “… who are you?”

Shit

“Ah- well…” I didn’t get to really explain before Bruce spoke again.

“And why didn’t anyone tell me someone was in our house?”

“Ah well I just kinda assumed,” said Tim.

That got a lot of murmurs of agreement from the rest of the table, Damian giving a pointed, “Given your track record Father, you cannot blame us.”

Bruce sighed and looked back at me, a very tired man, “What are you doing here?”

“I uh… I’m here for the food mostly.” It was all I could really think to say at the moment.

The air hung thick with tension as we all sat silently for a longer time than I was really comfortable with. That was until I heard a familiar voice.

“Hey guys, sorry for being so late. I would have gotten a ride from Jason but I had to work a little later than I wanted to.”

Motherfucker.

I whipped my head around to look at the man that just walked in, “DANNY?!”

[marlynnofmany]

Cave Space

The mechanic’s shop was the loudest and dirtiest place I’d seen on this space station so far, and somehow that was comforting. All the ritzy retail stores and elaborate restaurants tried to look as fancy as possible, even the cheap ones. But this place felt honest and straightforward. It had bare concrete floors and the kind of shelf displays that didn’t bother with signs to actually explain what you were looking at. A real mechanic would know.

I had no idea, but I was just here to help haul things. Blip and Blop might have been a better choice if the things in question proved to be heavy, but they were off wrangling jumbo tubs of food and medical supplies with Eggskin, and anyways we had the big hoversled this time. It would probably be fine.

Mimi was talking fast with an employee about manifolds and vents and lots of other words, waving a couple green tentacles while he stood on the rest. The employee was the biggest Heatseeker I could remember seeing, which was still only mid-rib-height on me. He reminded me of the short gym guys from back home, able to build muscle in every direction but up.

A box thumped onto a counter near me. “You here to help lift and pull?”

I found an older human woman grinning at me, wearing a tank top covered in grease and long white hair held back in a ponytail. Also the kind of arm muscle that said she yanked engines out of spaceships for fun.

“Something like that,” I said with a smile. “Gotta make sure nothing falls off the sled.”

She waved a hand. “Ah, we’ll strap it down for you. There’s enough ramps around here to cause problems if we don’t.”

“I bet,” I said, thinking back to the last time I’d chased something important down a hill. “Don’t want to risk any explosions or chemical spills.”

“Or slamming a gear shaft into the side of a building,” she agreed. “There was a bit of a mess the last time someone was sure they didn’t need their stuff tied down.”

I winced. “Ouch.”

“Yeah, it’s standard procedure now,” she said, opening the box to pull out multiple smaller boxes, all labeled with arcane terminology and numbers. They rattled as she stocked them on the shelf under the counter. “If they’d asked me, it would have been standard from the start, but what do I know? I’ve only been doing this kind of work for decades, on more planets than I care to count.”

“Sounds exciting,” I said as she finished stocking. “I haven’t been out here all that long by comparison, but there’s always something new to see.” A glance around the shop took in rows of alien technology, a Heatseeker with scales painted silver, and one of those centipede-like people whose species name I didn’t remember. I was pretty sure they were looking at a jetpack display.

“Oh sure, plenty of weirdos out here,” the woman said easily, ripping tape off the box and flattening it. “Though it’s easy to tip over from marveling at the wonders to feeling the kind of intense homesickness that you get when you’re light years away from home.”

“I suppose so.” I’d been pretty lucky on that front, since my alien coworkers were friendly sorts who made me feel welcome. But there were times when the sheer amount of empty space between me and Earth was a little too much to think about.

“You’ve got to find ways to remind yourself of where you come from, and take pride in it,” the older woman said with a pointed finger, like a grandparent giving career advice. “Recreate bits of home while you’re far from it.”

I thought back to the potted plants and sun lamp in my quarters, kept high enough that the cat couldn’t chew on them. “I like to think I do that,” I said. “Do you have a preferred method? Classic Earth songs, googly eyes stuck in funny places?”

She barked a laugh. “Ha! Nothing I’d admit to. But I’ll show you my current favorite touchstone to humanity.” She dug in a pocket.

I stepped closer, curious, as she pulled out something palm-sized. She rested her elbows on the counter and held it up, framed by splayed fingers with appropriate drama.

It was a rock, smooth and shiny like it had been polished by a river and then by a thick layer of varnish, and it was covered in minuscule handprints. All in earthtones, like a cave painting reduced to pocket size: some in silhouettes like tiny hands had pressed mud or ash against the cave wall, and others shadowed by color like the prehistoric artist had chewed charcoal and spat it carefully around their fingers.

(I’d done that in school one day, with one of the cool teachers, who taught us the basics of humanity’s oldest style of airbrushing. It was incredibly messy and trickier than I’d expected. It gave me renewed respect for the artists from eons ago whose artwork had survived into modern times.)

And this was that same thing, made small enough to carry around the galaxy, a tiny reminder of home. “That’s fantastic,” I breathed.

“Isn’t it?” she asked, rubbing at the shine. “I got it from a traveling artist awhile back. If I was in a different line of work, I’d sell clothes with this pattern on them. It’s the kind of thing that makes other Earthlings smile.” She stood up and put it back in her pocket with a wink. “Not like googly eyes, but still good.”

“Yes, still good!” I agreed, smiling. I would have liked to talk more about it, maybe find out where that traveling artist had gone, but Mimi was wrapping up his conversation. A door opened to admit a trio of Heatseekers carrying a huge cylinder that was probably destined for somewhere in the guts of our ship.

“I’ll get the tie-down straps,” said the woman, rummaging under a different section of counter.

“Thanks,” I said, though I don’t think she heard me. The air was full of talk and the sound of clawed feet on concrete. I hurried to take up a position by the controls of the hoversled, making sure it stayed locked in place.

The team worked quickly, and in no time they had it strapped down well enough that it wouldn’t budge even if the gravity cut out completely. (Which had better not happen; I’d had more than enough of that kind of nonsense at the last station.)

Mimi processed the payment, tapping a screen with one tentacle tip and thanking the employees for having this whatsit in stock. I got the impression that it wasn’t the one he’d actually come to get, but it was better in some way or other.

“Thanks again!” I said as we tugged the sled toward the door. I waved at the other human and she waved back, two hands signaling kinship briefly across the room. Then she took her flattened box into the back and I stepped out into the artificial sunlight, looking for signs leading back to the spaceport.

The gravity behaved, and the ramps were no trouble. Blip and Blop were there to help unload the thing. I asked Mimi if he wanted three people to maneuver it into wherever it went, or if I should go put the hoversled away.

He was busy climbing inside of the cylinder with a flashlight, for whatever reason. “Nah, not enough space for everybody,” his gravelly voice echoed. “Let me just — really? Another one?” A faint squeak sounded like he was rubbing a tentacle against the side.

“What is it?” I asked, bending to look inside. Blip and Blop crowded behind me, a jumble of curious muscles and silks.

Mimi grumbled, “This is the third engine part that I’ve gotten with these annoying marks. All from different sources, too. If I ever find out which finger-having species is doing it, we are going to have words.”

Deep inside the cylinder, in a spot that likely would never have been seen by anyone but an agile mechanic, was a patch of handprints. Mimi had already smeared the ones made in grease, but the others looked like they might have been paint. All in earthtones. A cave painting in the depths of a spaceship.

Blip and Blop chorused, “Not it.”

I bit my lip to hide a smile. “It’s a mystery.”

~~~

Inspired by this excellent artwork by @letmeinimafairy! It deserved at least one story, if not several.

~~~

These are the ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book.

Shared early on Patreon! There’s even a free tier to get them on the same day as the rest of the world.

The sequel novel is in progress (and will include characters from these stories. I hadn’t thought all of them up when I wrote the first book, but they’re too much fun to leave out of the second).

[peachhcs]

okay i would love to explore more of grace and sammy’s relationship!! i feel like her life is pretty testosterone filled so i’m sure samy always appreciated grace’s advice and support <3

HAHA “pretty testosterone filled” is soo funny but soo real poor girl didn’t know anything else but being around boys which is why she really loved having grace there in the summers and holidays :)

i feel like i don’t talk about their relationship as much so i’m glad someone brings it up!! she’s very big sister core, even to quinn and jack even though she was younger than them she still acted like an older sister to them which was always funny.

but yes!!! she definitely goes to grace for boy advice, talking about her first time ever with a guy when she was 16, advice about will, advice about college, etc. etc. (p.s. i’m going back to school soon 😔 so that’s why i’ve been posting so much and grinding these requests out bc i know i’m gonna be super busy when i start college again)

au masterlist

“so how’s that one guy..what’s his name? tyler?” grace asked the younger girl when it was just the two of them in the kitchen one morning because the boys went golfing.

samy flushed, “he’s good.”

“you’re blushing. it must be good,” the blonde teased when she saw samy’s pink cheeks. the brunette quickly brushed the comment off and shrugged.

“he’s nice and i like hanging out with him,” the girl said briefly.

“you guys have been hanging out a lot this summer..” grace wiggled her eyebrows to imply something that made the youngest hughes’ cheeks flush even more as she quickly hid her face.

“we just watch movies,” the girl mumbled.

“yeah, watch movies. i’ve definitely heard that one before,” grace couldn’t help but laugh because she’s used that so many times on her mom when she left to hang out with a boy.

“okay, we just make out and..sometimes we take our shirts off..and then sometimes he takes his pants off..ALL consensual of course,” samy’s blush burned to her ears talking about this in the open space of her kitchen where her parents could walk in at any second. grace quickly poked her arm though.

“okay, i see you. you’re getting in there,” grace grinned.

“ew, stop. do not say that to me,” the brunette cringed.

“okay, sorry, sorry. do you think you’ll take it to the next step?” grace genuinely wondered and samy shrugged. “i mean, i dunno.. maybe? i think we want to? i’ve just never..like..done that before,” the younger girl’s face burned again.

“that’s okay. the first time never has to be perfect. you just go with what you’re comfortable with and let the rest just kind of play out, you know?”

“what if hurts? or what if i bleed though?” the girl cringed again and ducked her head around looking for any indication that her mom was near.

“it’s relatively normal for it to hurt the first time, but once you get going the pleasure will kind of overtake the pain. if it keeps hurting though, don’t force yourself to keep going. bleeding is also normal too,” grace wasn’t a huge expert, but she knew a thing or two and hoped what she was telling samy was helpful.

“what was your first time like?” the younger girl’s couldn’t help but ask. she’d never ask her brothers any of this stuff, so she felt like having grace was her only chance to ask and asking her mom was just way out of the question.

“i was seventeen, so around your age. it was with that guy i was with, remember griffin?” samy nodded. “we were in his basement and we started making out and then we both were ready so..we just did it? it didn’t last that long, but we both enjoyed it,” grace explained.

“woah, griffin was your first time? i remember him. he was cool,” samy thought back to three years ago when griffin would be at thanksgiving and christmas.

“yeah, he was cool.”

“why’d you guys break up again?”

“we were just heading in different directions i guess and didn’t wanna hold each other back,” the older blonde shrugged some.

“would you ever think about..getting back together with him?” amicable breakups were always so hard sometimes.

“uh..i don’t know. i haven’t really talked to him awhile. plus, we’re talking about you, not me,” grace flushed and spun the conversation back to samy.

“i’m just scared i might regret having sex with him, but i really like him,” samy’s head fell into her hand and she sighed.

“well, don’t do anything that you aren’t 100% sure about. maybe just let things happen and if it starts happening and you don’t like it, you can always say no.”

“right, yeah. i guess that makes sense,” the brunette mumbled and grace reached forward to squeeze her arm.

“you’re so grown up, wow. i wish you were still six,” that made both girls laugh.

—

as soon as samy hung up the phone with her brothers, she immediately called grace hoping the older girl wasn’t busy. it rang almost four times before the call connected, “hey?”

“hey, gracie. sorry, am i bothering you?” samy worried she caught the older girl at a bad time based on the outside noise she could hear through the call.

“no, no. what’s up?” the background noise faded and samy guessed she was stepping somewhere more quieter.

“i just..i need some advice,” the brunette bit her lip as she toyed with the ends of her shirt.

“okay, what’s up?”

samy took in a deep breath before laying out everything she just did with her brothers a minute ago about how much of a hard time she was having with deciding on where to go to college and who’d she possibly disappoint if she picked one school over the other. grace listened silently until samy was finished and blew out a long sigh.

“wow,” grace said first.

“yeah, wow.”

“well, what do you want, sam?”

“that’s the problem, i don’t know,” the brunette groaned, falling back onto her bed.

“have you weighed pros and cons?” grace wondered.

“i’ve done about everything under the sun and i still can’t make a decision. going to mich would keep me close to home, but going to boston would give me a new perspective i don’t see a lot, you know? plus, i’d be with will and all of them.”

“well, you know my brother is gonna support you whenever you go. he wants you to be happy, samy. i know your brothers want the same and so do your parents. what do the soccer programs look like?” the youngest hughes blushed hearing grace tell her how happy will would be for her no matter what.

“they’re both really great. i mean, great as in i love the team atmosphere and the coaches. the programs could be worked on,” the brunette shrugged.

“i think you should go where your heart leads you. you’d have a lot of support wherever you choose because of my parents in boston and your parents in michigan,” grace said softly and samy rubbed a frustrated hand over her face.

“i know it’s a given how you chose, but can you tell me besides your family legacy what made you choose boston?”

“i guess..i just really liked the values boston college had. i loved how the campus looked and even though it is a fairly big school, i still felt a very strong community within it and i just knew i could picture myself here for four more years even though i literally grew up here,” the older blonde laughed a bit. “i guess you just gotta pick the place that feels like home to you.”

“what if both feel like home to me for different reasons?” samy admitted, rolling to her side to look out the window.

“what are the reasons?”

“well michigan obviously because of my brothers and my family’s tie to here. i’ve always loved the school whenever i watched quinn and luke play in the yost. for some reason i could always picture myself in the student section when i was older cheering the team on. but with boston..it just holds such a nostalgia to me since we only visited to see you and will. i love the city and well..will would be there and i guess..technically..will is my home in some ways?” samy cringed a bit hearing that come out of her mouth because she never would’ve thought in a million years she’d say that about the blonde.

“well, isn’t someone feeling sappy,” grace teased.

“shut up. i still find him annoying as hell,” that made both of the girls laugh.

“speaking of my brother..how are you guys?” grace changed the subject for a moment figuring samy would wanna get her mind off of college decisions for a bit.

good thing the older girl couldn’t see samy’s face because the brunette blushed hard.

“we’re..fine. i guess. i don’t know,” things were feeling really complicated between her and will recently and samy didn’t exactly know how to feel about it. “kevin and i are still together if that’s what you’re asking.”

“samy.”

“i know, i know i need to talk to him, but…i just can’t. i don’t know grace. the idea of liking will as something more than a friend..it’s crazy. i’ve only known him as another annoying brother,” grace knew all about samy and will’s drunk little kisses they shared in the past year and the confusion the youngest hughes has been having about her feelings towards the boy.

she was hoping being with kevin would help her forget thinking about kissing will in the bathroom when they were drunk, but it was actually doing really little.

“i just feel like this is gonna end badly for all of you. kevin will be hurt, you’ll be hurt, will be hurt.”

“i just don’t even know how one would even bring that up? hey sorry, i’m kind of leading you on because i’ve been kissing my best friend but only when we’re drunk and we never talk about it after and i act like it doesn’t happen, so i started dating you to forget about it? yeah, sounds real great.”

“well, don’t say it like that, but..i just don’t want you getting hurt, samy,” grace said.

“plus, i don’t even know if will even likes me like that. he probably doesn’t because liking your best friend is crazy,” samy went on and grace stayed silent which made the younger girl’s ears perk up. “do you know something?”

“no, i don’t. even if i did, i wouldn’t do my brother that dirty. i’m just saying, sam. it’s an awkward conversation, but it saves a lot of hurt in the end.”

“i know. i’ll..work on it.”

“on a different note, i am really surprised how close you and will have gotten in the past year. i remember when you guys used to hate one another,” the older smith giggled.

“we still kind of do,” samy snickered.

“either way, i’m glad you guys have worked out your differences and are close. it’s good he has someone being so far away from home,” her words made both of them smile.

“well, he’s become my rock so i don’t think our friendship will go away anytime soon,” the brunette grinned. “which is why i’m having a hard time choosing schools because what do i do when i’ve spend two years seeing will every single day to not seeing him for months on end?”

“yeah..i don’t really know honestly, sam. do what your heart wants on the inside. the first place that comes to your mind whenever you’re thinking about this,” grace said and images of michigan flashed in samy’s mind which quickly seemed to be her answer.

—

“god, i can’t believe you guys are going to college already,” grace was in town to help samy and will pack their things up for college. while will was out, the older blonde drove to ann arbor to see the brunette and catch up before school started.

“me neither. i didn’t think i’d be this sad about it honestly,” samy laughed while labeling her bins.

“you guys grew up way too fast for my liking, but i’m really proud of you guys. you’re gonna do really great at mich,” the blonde smiled.

“i’m really excited. we already have a groupchat for soccer and all the girls are so excited to welcome us freshmen in.”

“that’s really sweet. you’re gonna flourish, i just know it and i’ll be watching like i always do,” grace’s words were sentimental and it was taking a lot in samy to not burst out into tears these past few days as she said her goodbyes and packed her room away.

“how’s will’s packing doing? he was making progress when i saw him two days ago,” the brunette giggled.

“he’s getting a lot done with my help and mom’s. you know, he keeps talking about you, like, every conversation i swear he brings you up,” the younger hughes’ cheeks burned hearing that. it still felt so foreign to her to have this side of her will’s relationship unlocked and hearing him talk about her like that from other people.

“how surprised were you when you found out?” samy wondered while grace took a breather for a second by sitting on samy’s bed.

“surprised, but i did kind of see it coming. plus, i knew he had crazy feelings for you,” the blonde laughed.

“yeah, i’ve heard. i guess ryan and gabe’s teasing really was true.”

“it was also really obvious to everyone but you guys. we all basically knew,” that made samy flush even more. “but i’m really happy for you guys. i’ve never seen will so smiley and happy about someone before.”

“it sucks that we’re only getting together at the end of summer basically. i’m gonna really miss him,” samy admitted with a small frown.

“i know it sucks, but i think long distance will be good for you guys because you can grow into yourselves outside of your relationship you know? be your own person. plus, you guys already know everything about one another so you’ve already made it over the hardest part,” the oldest smith sibling hummed.

“i guess so. i just wish we had a little more time together. feels like i just got him and now i’m losing him for months on end.”

“knowing will, he’ll beg you to fly out,” that made them laugh.

“it’s so cliche, you know? childhood best friends fall in love with one another later on. we really hit that one on the head,” samy giggled.

“i don’t think it’s cliche. i think it’s cute. i always feel like the relationships that were friendships first always work out the best because you already know everything about one another, you know?”

“yeah like how he always pooped his pants when we were like five,” the girls laughed again.

“it will fly by, i promise.”

samy thought of will out with some of his friends right now. he wondered what they were doing and how she was gonna see him later tonight when she drove back with grace after packing some more.

to no one’s surprise, will was also thinking of samy. anytime he looked at his phone, he saw the lockscreen of the two of them together and the blonde always grinned seeing her there.

[eusuntgratie]

2025 wips

thank you for the tag @anincompletelist <3

i am a perpetual too-many-wips disaster so i'm always grateful for an opportunity to lay out what i'm working on.

malex pretty woman au (roswell new mexico)

my next big project is the malex pretty woman au. alex is the rich, detached businessman, michael is captivating in tiny blue shorts and thigh high boots. do you see the vision? i need to make a banner and pick a title!

(i make ONE comment to @bigassbowlingballhead about craving a certain type of fic and suddenly i'm being enabled into my next longfic 🙃). i am genuinely so excited about this one. i've got about 5k written and the whole fic is plotted. i'm thinking this will be in the 25-30k range? maybe? honestly jon is better at estimating my word counts than i am so who knows. still not sure if i'll finish writing this one and then edit and post chapter by chapter or what i'll do, but i think i'll be able to get this one up this year.

firstprince exes (rwrb)

if i have another big project in me i would LOVE to finish my outsider pov firstprince exes fic. i love love love this weird little fic but it is a real challenge to write.

sequels & additional chapters

part 3 of conformation (rnm) will be just alex and michael after their fun with maria at the club. maybe alex will make good on his idea of tying michael up and seeing how much he can take. i could write millions of words of sub!michael please do not tempt me.

chapter 3 of after hours (first prince/rwrb) aka mechanic alex will be alex and henry's first date.

one shots

come back inside is a malexa morning after the airstream scene fic...what if michael convinced alex to stay? this is probably more than half written. malexa my beloved 😍

hunting guide au (tknp, men's hockey rpf). tk hires pat for a guided hunt with his young daughter.

these might not happen 😐

shadow is a buddie fic that was gonna be a big bang fic (which will never happen) but i *could* finish and post the first few chapters as a one shot. featuring baby eddie having his mind blown by a slightly older, extremely gay buck at a college party while visiting his sister.

i wanna be adored is an elliott/marco, marco gets dropped into crystal valley fic that i've written about 5k for but can't quite get to do what i want. when i started writing it there were no kissingchambers fics, but there are lots now! so if you like them you should probably just read those bc this bad boy probably won't see the light of day even though i've got about 5k written.

dumotanger omegaverse college au (men's hockey rpf) - y'know i really love this one and i am unhinged about dumotanger but i think there's just something missing here that i haven't been able to figure out. i'd love to finish it if i do though! i've got maybe 3k written.

okay those are the ones with something significant written. i have LOTS of other abandoned wips and ideas, plus i always like to do some kind of short prompt series. i haven't done femslash february in a while so maybe i could write a few ficlets for that? maybe do some shuffle prompts again? hmmm. we'll see, we'll see.

my askbox and dms are always open for questions about my fic, wips, ideas, etc. <3

open tag for anyone with wips they wanna share!!!

[becaexists]

30 days of Echor - Week 2

So I'm back to talk about my lovely OCs again with this weeks prompts (I have serious brainrot over them thank you so much @green-eyes-and-orange-ties for starting this)

1.Ino Aristos

Hair: Short light brown bob with curtain bangs, curly, tighter curls near her ears Eyes: One teal, one bright pink, no pupils, people think they're contacts most the time Distinctive Markings: Other than her VT traits, she has a scar on her cheek from cutting it by accident with the edge of a cupboard door (she's short okay leave them alone), and a tattoo of the leo and cancer symbols intertwined on her shoulder Everyday Clothes: white or black tank top, baggy black jeans or black skirt with ripped tights, grey or, if she's feeling daring, pink custom made jumper with space for wings, big black floor length faux fur coat to hide wings, and black and pink platform boots Formal: Never really had a chance to wear formal apart from her wedding day, where she wore a black dress with real lace on the sleeves and neck, complete with poofy sleeves and skirt PJs: Pink tank top with "don't talk to me unless I've had my coffee" written on the front, and pink with rainbow stars short-shorts Something That Isn’t What It Appears To Be: The coat hides her wings pretty well that people don't know unless she takes the coat off

2. Atlas Aristos

Hair: Sunset colours (pink and blonde), usually clipped back away from her eyes with her flower hairclip but it still somehow falls in her face, short wolf cut with bits that always stick out at the sides (Ino calls it axolotl hair) Eyes: Green with snake-like pupils Distinctive Markings: As well as her previously mentioned VT traits, she also has white egg-shell-like scales on her cheeks (luckily these can be covered with makeup pretty easily), and the same tattoo as Ino (matchy matchy) Everyday Clothes: White or pink graphic t-shirt with a cute design on the front, pink or white plaid skirt, thigh highs or tights, light tan coat or green leather jacket, pink and white platform boots, and her signature hello kitty backpack and my melody strap bag (one can never be over prepared) Formal: Like with Ino, only wore formal for her wedding, where she wore a blush tulle and lace off-the-shoulder dress, which had floral designs on the bodice and sleeves, completed with matching pink floral heels PJs: Black and pink kuromi pajama bra and short-shorts (if it's cold she puts her my melody onesie on) Something That Isn't What It Appears To Be: From how she looks and dresses, you wouldn't expect her to be the one in the couple that carries around self-defense items in case they get attacked for whatever reason, but in that cute sanrio bag, there's an equally cute and pink switch knife and pepper spray

Oh this was so much fun!!! I made them pinterest boards to get ideas for their outfits and such, and I made picrews of them too! The one with the pink background is Ino and the purple is Atlas

I can't wait to do next week's!!!

[booksandmore]

i really would not change a single thing about the malec plotline (breakup and all) but sometimes i really do wish we got to see alec date at least one other person yk? and i dont mean that in a pre-cog focing himself to date a woman to hide his sexuality way, i mean in a post-breakup rebound/fling kinda way like i just know the drama would be legendary

[menstits]

Idk why this whole diluc vs kaeya argument is even happening like it's so dumb because there is objectively a correct opinion to have in this debate. I literally like diluc, he's genuinely one of my favorite characters in the game, and honestly that's part of why it's so fucking annoying to me when people downplay the fight or act like he was justified in attacking his visionless younger brother with pretty clear killing intent because he very much was not justified and it's not treated that way by the game itself either AND. If you approach kaeya's character in good faith the whole situation is really heart wrenching and so is his reaction to the whole crepus delusion thing but obviously none of these people ever do that because they're dumb as fuck and only take whatever is said about kaeya at face value or read him as more malevolent and ~shady~ than he actually is even though that's literally not how he's written & then when it comes to diluc they will entirely make shit up about his character that is nowhere to be seen in his actual characterization to make him nicer and more meek than he actually is . I need to stop bitching about this recreationally because I'm getting so mad I'm getting dizzy but you get the gist. It's just all around very clear when people will afford a character the benefit of the doubt when they react like an insane person to strong emotions vs when they will interpret someone's reaction to grief in the most cruel possible way literally entirely because they either consciously or subconsciously consider kaeya's grief at the loss of their father "less real" on account of him being adopted even though one fact that genshin keeps hammering into our brains at literally every chance they get is that family bonds don't depend on blood ties alone.

[moinsbienquekaworu]

Devastating news: my brother is a normal person. It doesn't run in the family, I'm just a weird freak for no reason

[moe-broey]

"I didn't really raise either of you in a gendered way" When I was like 10 or 11 maybe 12 but definitely not 13 yet, one day you asked me if I wanted to try on the wedding dress you married my dad in. I liked playing dress up and I liked hanging out with you, so I said yes. We're in the living room that you would (already have?) marry my stepdad in. You button up the back of the dress, I don't know why this becomes a core memory. You married my stepdad in a sundress, very casual, very small "event", only the barest of minimum people required to officiate and witness the wedding were there. You tell me, "Maybe one day, when you get married, you can wear this dress. Oh, but you don't have to if you don't want to! But, do you want it?" I still have the dress. I'm a man. And I don't think I'll ever marry. "You can get rid of it, you won't hurt my feelings." I can't.

[icewindandboringhorror]

Recent game related things .. hrmm...

[warriorprincesstramp]

the utter lack of affection or care amongst my extended family is so bleak and miserable

[amerasdreams]

is there something wrong w me

Is there something just too annoying or grating about me the reason no one really clicks with me

Was it always like this or just too late by 2012

Could I have diverted to a good time line

In any case it doesn't matter bc it's too late now

It feels like it is

How can there be any future

[givemethedamnflowers]

I had the extreme honor today of saying "he's our spider george" and to be understood it was amazing

[roturo]

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ OH! SO YOU'RE INTO OLDER MEN?

˚₊·➳❥ JJK MEN SHOWING YOU HOW A REAL MEN FUCKS! satoru gojo, suguru geto, kento nanami, toji fushiguro ✧˚ · .

tags: afab!reader, reader is mentioned as a female, use of nicknames (baby, princess, doll, slut, whore), cheating, degradation, caught cheating, getting caught, unprotected sex, blowjob, pussy slapping, mating press, breeding, age-gaps, virginity loss [...] rbs are appreciated!

satoru gojo (Daddy’s girl)

well, that’s the word he used for the little girl you're babysitting right now. he’s a great dad and husband. there’s just this tiny whiny little thing he couldn’t do right– and that’s loving his wife as he should.

like– it’s not that he doesn’t feel guilty, it’s just… well, you looked really cute in that mini dress, he and his wife have been fighting lately anddd– he could tell his daughter liked you more than her fatality of mother she has these days. she even called you mommy by accident once! and that was the last water drop gojo needed for the glass to break.

“Oh- I bet you’d love to be full of me right now.” His thrusts became messier each time he pounded on you, “Mhh, fill you up ‘n make me a daddy again– you’d like that princess?” you couldn’t even talk anymore with how good he’s making you feel– he had your legs pressed on the bed thanks to his arms, almost bending you in half, he was making sure that mating press works.

“Ffffuckk- You feel s’good baby” He felt your walls clenching again, no matter how many times he made you come, he’s making sure you’re coming again after he does. A not ending cycle for him. “Such a slut for me hm? Coming all nice and pretty to this house just to be ruined at night–” his words made you feel dirty, but the euphoria of it was stronger, “such” slap, “a nasty” slap, “slut” slap– “and all f’me” with those last thrusts your body couldn’t take it anymore, spasming and trembling while your poor hole was filled up again. gojo’s wife didn’t even bothered to break your little encounter, she suspected it long time ago.

all that was left was a wide grinning gojo satoru and some divorce papers.

suguru geto (Daddy’s best-friend)

you didn’t intend this to happen… you always knew your dad’s best-friend was hot. he’s geto, ‘cmon. he brings a new girl every weekend whispering in your dad’s ear swearing she’s the one this time.

he saw you grow up, turn into this beautiful and strong woman. so how he couldn’t love you? you were like a doll for him, so beautiful and radiant in every way. a porcelain doll he needed to protect, he couldn’t lose you to any dangerous or stupid man, he swears he would beat the shit out of the guy who breaks your heart first.

“Shhiiiitt– Heh– I can tell how tight your pussy is princess–” His cock was stretching the living shit out of you, touching places never in a thousand years you could imagine you would feel. “what d’ya think daddy would say if he saw his little girl being fucked by his best-friend huh?” your brain was a fuzzy mess, you couldn’t make coherent words to say, and just feel how good geto is making you feel. you couldn’t remember how many times he had made you cum with his toungue and he’s just starting to fuck your pussy.

“ ‘m such a lucky guy if i'm the first you’re giving this pussy to, don’t ya think so doll? marking it as mine, baby I swear you’ll need no man to ever fuck this pussy of yours again– shit I won’t need another woman for myself, you’re the one baby” those words filled your heart of a tingly feeling, making more butterflies roam around your tummy, touching yourself you could sense geto’s cock coming and leaving with every thrust, your brain full of air and in need of more of his cock.

he couldn’t resist himself anymore when he was next to you, his cock would get hard the minute he enters your house, and thankfully he has a pretty doll to release himself with.

kento nanami (Big Boss)

Nanami thinks he’s a good and mature guy– At least for his wife and kids… He has this aura of a serious and mature guy but inside every time he’s just this close to breaking it, just to say what he really thinks or feels.

the first time he saw you at work with your tiny skirts and tight blouses he didn’t mind any type of attention to it, you were another cute worker, that’s all. One of another– he can think other women are pretty too right? maybe even prettier than his wife… and nicer, and cuter, and more homely feeling to be a mom. but he wouldn't do anything he would later regret right?...

“You’re s’pretty baby, such a dirty whore for my cock mhm?” he had you pounding from behind, his desk becoming even messier than it was before, one of his hands keeping you laid down on the desk arching your back like if he’s trying to break it– a sudden ringing brought you back from your unconsciousness of nanami’s cock– he answered the call, not a single sing of him trying to stop thrusting into you.

“Yeah?” his voice was out of breath, almost sounding like a sigh when he answered the call, “Where am I? Huh– I’m at the office r-right now…?” he wasn’t even sure if he could keep this act, losing himself more in the feeling of your pussy clenching on his cock– “Oh yeah- I’m okay, uhh- the kids? yyeah, yeah, they’re with my mom right now–” the feeling of keeping up a call with his wife while fucking you made his cock twitch inside of you, feeling like a teenager kissing their crush for the first time. it was no surprise for him that his wife was cheating, but he wanted to keep it like that for the sanity of his kids. 

“Quit the act Kento– I know you’re fucking somebody else right now. See ya at home.”

toji fushiguro (Step-Daddy)

you hated when your mother started dating new guys. they just kept breaking her heart– but you just stopped telling her that it's okay to live without a partner, that she had you by her side, but well… this new man was something else i guess and you didn’t say anything for the sake of your own good mother.

you didn’t like him, but for the sake of your mother you pretended like you do– and let’s be honest, toji doesn’t like children, so when he first met you he wasn’t as social as others… your mom was just too good to simply let go– but the way you moved, talked, dressed caught his attention, and as time passes and he spends more time with your mom– he's no longer drawn to your house just to see your mother, but to see you. 

“Sshhiit- You’re making me feel s’good baby” the lack of air was making you feel giddy, but the way his cock twitched inside your mouth made your core get even wetter. “C’mon baby, ride my shoe,” you wasted no time before your hips started moving, trying to gain some friction and release that tingly feeling coming from your core. 

“D’ya think your mother would like to see her daughter being full of his step-daddy’s cum?” he gets one of his arms behind himself trying to gain some support while his other free hand caresses your cheeks while you continue sucking– this same hand moves out your head and frees his cock out of your mouth, a small strand of saliva connecting your mouth with it–

“Fuck– guess i choose the wrong out of you two”