#even if it does look like a very very long sad worm

[hairmetal666]

After the Russians, Steve learns three important things about himself:

Robin is the best friend he's ever had; the uncontested other half of his heart. His soulmate, the platonic love of his life, his missing puzzle piece.

He's not in love with Nancy anymore. It's really saying something that hearing those words come out of his mouth is the shock of his life. Once the drugs wear off, though, he realizes they were absolutely true. A surprising win for the Russian truth serum

Her bathroom confession...he sits with it for days. Not--not because she's a lesbian, of course not, but because. Well, Robin knows herself in a way he's never allowed himself to. And he thinks that maybe maybe he likes boys in the same way. That he always has, but never let himself acknowledge it, the way his eyes wanted to catch in the locker room, the drunken, fumbling touches between him and Tommy.

The last one...he's not sure, is the thing. How can he be sure? Like, in his mind, his imagination, he's very into it, but what if it's different in real life? And how can he even find out? He tells, Robin, of course he does, and they go to Indy, right, to a bookstore and she throws a few zines at him and he sneaks some porn (he's definitely into the porn), but that's not--it's not practical experience. And he's not ready to go to one of the bars, for sure, so he doesn't--like what's he supposed to do?

It's around this time in his bisexual spiral that the kids start hanging out with Eddie Munson, that he starts thinking about Eddie Munson. He always noticed the long, dark curls and the bright, brown eyes; the slender cut of his waist; the wry slant of his mouth as he shouted insults at the jocks; the glinting silver of the rings on his fingers--fingers that were long and callused, fingers that could grip around Steve's--

Nope, he's not going there. Even though, a little voice in his head says, he cares for Steve's kids and maybe he's not good at school but he's smart and he's also so pretty, with his pale skin and his big eyes--

No. He doesn't have a crush on Eddie Munson. Absolutely not.

And when he picks up the kids from their little dnd club and sees Munson standing against his van, he doesn't feel an electric zing in his chest, the first stirring of butterflies in his stomach; that would be crazy. They hardly know each other. It goes like this every time, and he's almost able to believe he doesn't care.

Until Eddie trips over the threshold of Family Video, stumbling on an untied bootlace and gangling his way through the front doors. The clatter catches both Robin and Steve's attention.

"Welcome to Family Video," Robin says. Steve stares.

"Uhh." Eddie's eyes flit between them, his face getting redder by the second.

Fuck, he's so cute and Steve's saying--without thinking about it, he's saying--"let me help you find a movie, man."

"Yea--sure, yeah." Eddie's hands are stuffed in the tight pocket of his jeans.

Steve takes a few steps down the closest aisle. "So, what--uh, what are you looking for?"

"Horror? Nothing in particular."

They make their way to the horror section, and it's like some insane, deeply horny demon takes over. He starts grabbing movies off the shelf, no rhyme or reason, doesn't even know what most of them are.

Eddie's staring at him with wide eyes and a raised eyebrow, and Steve just keeps grabbing tapes, is sort of doing a running commentary on titles and tag lines, and he can't stop, why can't he stop? it's like smoke is coming out of his ears. Robin is watching him from the counter with her mouth hanging open, gummy worm dangling down her chin.

"You know," Eddie grabs something from the shelf, "I think I'll just do Friday the 13th again. Can't go wrong."

And he leaves Steve standing there with half the horror section collected in his arms. He stays there while Eddie pays, face burning. It's been--well, a really long time since he's struck out so hard, and he wasn't even really trying.

As Eddie's walking out the door, his sad pile of movies shifts, then tumbles to the floor.

"You have a crush on Eddie Munson." Robin accuses.

"No!" He ducks down to collect the tapes, hoping to hide the crimson of his face.

"You do." She points an accusatory finger in his direction. "I haven't seen you this pathetic since Scoops."

"It's nothing."

"You know," she crouches down with him, "you could just, like. Try to hang out with him."

"After that? Are you kidding? I'm surprised you don't already have a new You Rule/You Suck board going."

"Oh, I do, it's up front." She jumps to her feet. "But still. You should try. And you have an easy in with the kids."

He glares at her in response, starts re-shelving all the dumb movies, and then they get busy, so the topic is dropped. He thinks about it thought. He thinks about it and he--

Instead of waiting in the car for the kids to get done at Hellfire the next time, he goes in.

[kissitbttr]

dilf!toji who finds you sitting in the curb at one am when he’s doing a quick run to 7/11 to grab a few snacks and a six pack. wondering why on earth, a pretty girl like you is alone.

after paying, he exits through the door before walking cautiously towards you. eyes glancing left and right to find no one is around, not even a car. meaning that you may have walked here.

“hi there sweetheart, you okay?” he calls out of worries. it’s very dark outside and far too dangerous for a young thing like you to be all here alone.

the moment you turn your head around, toji swears he had never seen someone so beautiful. glossy irises looking up at him with your messy long curls framing your features. glittery makeup decorating your eyes, nose and lips.

you must be no older than twenty-five.

“huh?” so clueless, yet so pretty. “o-oh. i’m—good, sir.. thank you” shooting him a small toothy grin with a gummy worm tuck in between your teeth,

he chuckles at that, hand shoved into the pockets of his sweatpants. how adorable.

he nods his chin towards your disregarded kitten heels beside you. “rough night?”

shrugging, you tug off the stretchy sweet off your mouth before chewing. “something like that.”

he tsks at that, head shaking. “it’s not safe for a girl like you to be out here. considering it’s very late. did you walk here?”

nodding, you put a strand of hair behind your ear. “i did, yes. i needed.. food. i was hungry.”

your answer makes him breathe out a laugh. “candies aren’t food, sweetheart—i assumed you were at a party dressing like that” he points out at your skin tight pink dress that barely covers your thighs, and he has to restrain himself from thinking unholy thoughts.

“it was getting quite crowded… i didn’t like it.. suffocating” your voice coming off quiet, if not—sad—“the food there is awful too”

toji hums, taking another step closer as your eyes follow his movements. head tilting back a bit when you notice he’s only standing inches away from your small figure,

“boyfriend not around?” his head move to the side, eyes roaming down your figure. shaking your head, he asks again. “what happened?”

you reply shakily. “he dumped me.. called me nasty things” a tear escapes your eye as you begin to remember what your ex had done to you two hours prior. “t-that’s why i’m here.”

when he sees you beginning to cry, he can’t help but feel bad. what a fucking asshole he thinks. making a cute girl cry and dumped her in the middle of the night? who fucking does that?!

he crouches down to your eye level. and that’s when you finally take a good look of his appearance. breath almost hitching at just how even more handsome he looks up close. even the faint scar across his lips just makes this man even more hotter.

“i’m sorry to hear that, sweetheart. sounds to me like he’s a straight jerk, yeah?” he says with a small smile. seeing you nod as a reply. gaze isn’t moving from his. “don’t cry over him, i bet he doesn’t deserve a beautiful girl like you”

your cheeks warm at that, eyes dropping to your lap just so he won’t notice how nervous he makes you feel by that comment. however, his finger moves underneath your chin to get you to look back at him again. his thumb grazing against your soft skin,

“want me to beat his ass for you? because i will, just lead the way”

you can’t help but giggle at his offer, and it makes toji’s heart skip a beat at the beautiful sound. his lips stretch into a bigger smile when he sees you like that.

“atta girl. there she is” he chuckles, “how old are you, baby?”

“i’m twenty one”

toji mutters out a soft ‘fuck’ which earns a confused frown from you. he’s almost twice your age. “you need a ride back to the party? i promise i’m not a creep or anything. just can’t stand at the thought of you walking back alone. something bad could happen, you know?”

“i would like that very much sir, thank you” a smile pulls upon your pink glossy lips, fingers fiddling with each other,

toji finds you to be endearing, adorable and pretty when you look at him like that. it has been too long since someone makes his heart ponder like this, and all you had to do was just smile at him with a gummy packet in your hand.

“call me toji, sweetheart—c’mere. up you get” he moves the sixpack towards his left hand as the other grabs yours, helping you up on your feet. “but before that, i think you need to get better food in your system. we’ll stop by at something, yeah?”

you nod quickly, slipping your feet back into the heels with a wide smile not leaving your face. “okay!”

with that, toji smiles back at you before putting his hand on your back, guiding you towards his car.

-

will expand because in this au toji is a rich ass man and ready to give him everything for his soon to be baby <3

(look what you made me do @tojisun )

[soneblomsblog]

hii i have a request! not sure if you do headcannons specifically but, boyfriend!yeon sieun with sunshine!reader. or partner who is the opposite of him character wise, a very positive and loving being. keep up the good workkk !!

Absolutely! I haven't had any requests like this and I'm more then happy to write them ;)

HEADCANON

boyfriend!yeon sieun x sunshine!reader

● at first, yeon sieun has no idea what to do with you.

● like... you're smiling all the time, you wave at strangers, you talk to animals. he thinks you're insane. you're sunshine personified and he’s a walking cloud.

● but you worm your way in. you offer him snacks without asking. you compliment his hands. you cheer when he gets a question right in class. and for the first time in a long time, he starts looking forward to someone’s presence.

● he tries to be logical about it. “there’s no scientific reason for my heart rate to spike when they smile,” he tells himself.

spoiler alert: there is. it’s called falling in love, baby.

● you're the only person allowed to poke his cheeks. no one else would dare.

● you say "i love you" about seven times a day. he says it once a week, at most—quietly, almost like it escapes him by accident. but every time he says it, it means the world.

● his hand always finds yours in crowds. he acts like it’s for “safety reasons” but you both know it’s not.

● you kiss his forehead and he freezes for a whole minute like his internal software crashed.

“you good?”

“...yes. just updating.”

● you're the first person to ever see him cry. he didn’t mean to—but you were holding his face and telling him he’s enough, just as he is, and the dam just broke.

● he’s secretly so protective of you. the quiet “stay behind me” when he senses tension, the way he watches over you from across the room even when he seems distracted. no one messes with his sunshine.

● you once made him laugh so hard he snorted and went beet red.

you haven't let him live it down.

● when you’re sad, he becomes the most awkward but well-meaning boyfriend alive.

he brings you tea. he silently sits beside you. he holds your hand. no words, just his steady presence. he knows how much it matters.

● your brightness isn’t something he tries to dim—it’s something he adores. he doesn’t always say it, but god, does he love you for it.

[ryker-writes]

Greetings, my friend –

You've been trying to get me into twst for a while, and I might be encouraged to play if you write something featuring the characters you think I'd like (give me emos & traumatised men). The scenario can be whatever you want pookie

Love the writing, keep it up ♡

p.s. if I like this I'll write you hcs for the npcs you like in our dnd campaign 🥰

Trips over myself with how fast I go to answer

Emo's and traumatized men...well, just about every housewarden is full of trauma. But emos/edgy men are more do-able! So, you get Malleus, Lilia, Leona, and Idia. You also get Jaxon as a bonus because you know him, he's emo, and traumatized! Please get the game, I'm begging you

Remember when I told all of you to say hi to my friend that's stalking my blog? Yeah, this is them

A very academic and studious s/o

Malleus:

Now, Malleus is a very smart guy himself, but he's never had to put as much effort in school as you are

He's seen many students put themselves deep into their studies (especially those failing), but you do it even when you're doing well in classes, almost like it's fun?

He's very perplexed by you, but he does understand and respect your ambition for your studies

Study dates! Study dates!

Well, it's more like you studying while he admires you and watches you with that fond loving smile

He doesn't need to study, he's one of the top mages for a reason, but he'll happily listen to you telling him all about what you're reading about and offer any insights he may have

Though he'll tell you all about gargoyles if you want!

Regardless if you're human, fae, beastman, merfolk, Malleus treats you a little like a fragile creature that forgets your own needs, so he's going to be reminding you of breaks and to drink water because he hates to see you not taking care of yourself

You will never have tp pay for your books or any school supplies every again because he's buying you brand new everything without even blinking

He admires your dedication, but part of him also wants your attention on him instead of the books so you might find him closer than usual on days when he wants your attention

It starts with sitting closer, and then becomes him trying to bring you snacks and water earlier than normal, to him trying to convince you to take longer breaks, and if you still don't give him as much attention, he's not against teleporting your schoolwork away for the evening

He looks like a sad puppy when you reject him attention for your studies

Malleus most happy just spending time around you, so hold his hand while you study or ask him what he thinks of the topics while in the peaceful quiet of one of your dorm rooms, and he'll be happy

Lilia:

Similarly to Malleus, he doesn't need to study that much

I mean technically he doesn't even need to be at Night Raven College and he's only there to support Malleus anyway, so studying isn't really his thing

but he'll happily help! And maybe distract you from time to time during it because he wants your attention

if you're studying history, he's got you covered, I mean, he's literally in the history books sooooo

he could actually tell you more about the history than the books will to be honest

his memory on all the things is like easy way to write a paper if you ever need, and he'll happily tell you everything in long stories

he'll bring you snacks and stuff, but it's probably best you don't eat it. If you do, well, you won't be able to study or do any work because you'll be sick in bed

while you're studying, he might poke you or ask you questions to try and get your attention on him, but if you're persistent and keep studying, he might just crawl his way into your space

he'll hang down from the ceiling above you and try to surprise you, crawl on your back, or he'd even worm his way into your lap

there's no way out of holding him. He's too persistent. Just give in

you might hear him mumbling about your dedication things like, "Ah, to be young again" or "the youth of today are fascinating in their determination"

he never elaborates on that either or says anything else when you question him

now, if you're studying too hard and pushing yourself beyond your limits, he's stopping you by literally carrying you away

despite his small size, he's absolutely going to succeed, don't even try to fight because it's futile (he's literally a war general, you're not winning)

he'll drag you far away from your books as he's telling you all about how you need to stay healthy and not push yourself too hard or else you won't be able to do your best work or be energized when you need it most

don't you worry though, he's good at helping you pace yourself (Forcibly moving you away when he's deemed you've done enough studying after a few hours) and you'll never be able to overwork yourself on his watch

Leona:

First of all, how dare you

anytime you're studying, he glares at those books like they've personally burned his home or something

don't get me wrong, he's not against you wanting to do well in school, but he just hates that you spend so much time with the books

you should be spending time with him >:|

he's going to be next to you the entire time too like if you're sitting on the ground or a bed, he's curled around you or laying across your lap

if you're sitting at a desk, he'll be a bit grumpier and try and convince you to move somewhere more comfortable

if you're too stubborn (his words), he'd either sit on the ground next to you and rest his head in your lap, or he'd pick you up and sit in the chair himself and place you in his lap before resting his head on your back and wrapping his arms around you

he's 100% napping while you study so you have the background noise of him snoring

Leona would like to listen to you talk about what you're studying, purely because he likes to fall asleep to your voice

He could help, but he's not a big fan of helping because he thinks you can figure it out on your own, and also he doesn't want to use his mind to figure it out

he knows the answers, but he doesn't do any of the schoolwork himself because it's too much work and effort

its why he's been held back before, like it's too much work for him, but if you can somehow convince him to let you help, he might be willing to give it a shot (if you promise to give him more cuddles or affection in return)

yeah, there's no overworking yourself or pushing yourself too hard while he's literally right there, like there's no way he's letting that happen

he will drag you to the bed and lay on top of you, and then make Ruggie hide your books somewhere until he deems it's okay for you to get back to studying

try as you might, Ruggie isn't telling you where he put them, like Leona has bribed him good for this

please don't test Leona with how far he'll go, he's not against using his unique magic to turn your work to sand

if you ever ignore him for schoolwork, he can get SO annoying and demanding for attention

you know how cats sometimes push their way into your lap and push the things you have away? He does that when he really wants your attention

good luck

Jaxon:

okay, we all know Jaxon loves his goody-two-shoes people, but this also goes for super smart people, like his twst ship is literally a guy that is obsessed with rules and success like come on now

it's basically his type

that being said, he doesn't get it at all! Jaxon himself has never done well in school (though that's partially for other reasons), nor does he have any desire to push himself nearly as hard as you do in order to do well in classes

the only class he can maybe help you with is music or practical magic, but even then he's sometimes struggling

on the bright side, he's not against bribing asking Ruggie to get anything you need to study, and has even asked him to get snacks or drinks sometimes for you

please don't ask him to read anything for you, he still struggles sometimes with his dyslexia and is trying so hard to act like it's not affecting him (especially in front of you)

Jaxon doesn't invade your space while studying like some people, but he does linger in the general area

if you ask he'd place you in his lap while you study or sit with his back against yours or against the side of your chair

usually he's on his phone or making small adjustments to one of his guitars (but if the noise bothers you he'd stop)

if you're lucky and in the privacy of one of your dorm rooms, he'd maybe get some sleep

tired and uncaring as he may seem half the time, he does pay close attention to you while you're studying

his care and attention while you're studying is done silently, with a water bottle or a snack silently being placed next to you

or if you're working too hard or studying for too long, he'll yank the books and papers once you're at an okay stopping point, and take them away

now, I don't know how tall you are, but he's pretty tall and one of the tallest among students, and he's not above holding your work out of your reach

most likely though he'd just hide it or keep it on him and make sure you can't take it from him, and if he's desperate, he'd hide it in his dad's office

he'd rather spend time with Crowley than let you overwork yourself

chances of getting him to study with you are slim, but I wish you luck

Idia:

Studying? You mean you actually study?

okay, Idia is a gamer and chronically online and speaks in internet terms, all his "studying" is done virtually with some game or video playing in the background

it's a great sentiment, wanting to do well in school, but he has daily quests to do in his games too

Idia isn't a guy that gets/is capable of handling a lot of physical affection, so he may break down if you want to hold his hand or have him connected to you while studying

his room is like a distraction goldmine, but unfortunately getting him to leave his room and study somewhere else is an extremely difficult task, so I hope you're good at focusing

you can have study dates, but it might include the background noise of one of his games running and the buzzing of technology

he (lovingly) refers to the great times you spend studying as "the grind" or the "XP farming so you can level up"

though he can help when you need it! He's an introvert and attends classes virtually, but he knows his stuff and can help you with most of the more practical subjects, especially math and science

if you really needed help though, he's already developed a virtual program to help him study with reminders for food and drinks and tools to help you review!

speaking of reminders for food and drinks, yeah, if he's not using that program then there's no way he's going to remember to even feed himself, much less you too

Ortho is probably gonna have to come in and remind both of you to take care of yourselves every hour or so, but don't worry, he's used to it with Idia

this also applies with reminders of when to stop/sleep, because Idia stays up late anyway

but! if he's absorbed in his game, he might stop every little bit and check in and be like "Shouldn't you be asleep?? Do you know what time it is?? Your energy bar has to be running low"

while he admires your dedication (though he doesn't fully understand it), he struggles to enforce his care unlike the others

he can't force you to do anything, but he's sure gonna try and pester you for a while if you don't take care of yourself

Idia sucks at taking care of himself, but he's not gonna let that happen to you

if worst comes to worst, he'll lock your work away in a safe with the highest technological security until you rest

[squalchinglobotomy]

Spooky freaks doodle dump!!

Okay only like... one of these r not old lol

ok that's it no more babies, time for the grandpas!!

OK. I AM SO VERY TIRED AND JUST WANT TO YAP!! Mainly abt the doodles n other stuff lol.

I'm obvi gonna talk about the comic WIP first, the drawing would've looked awesome if I actually finished it. Basically it was supposed to cover what the freak show does every Sunday, a wonderful, long, and super boring religious teaching from the main man Atlas. Literally no one else but Ignacio and Lila really care about these teachings. Patty is semi-interested, sad guy is sleeping, happy fella is only up because he's hyper, Bob's brain worms are gnawing at his last braincell, and everyone else is just bored out of their minds.

Truthfully, I based this on my own experiences going to church and how damn bored I was, lo!!!

Okk the Kevin and spooky kids drawing. The little cheek thing Kevin is doing to Skid was something silly I came up with. Because Kevin can't pat skid on the head he just .... does that. It was this or Kevin putting his bare foot on Skid's cranium. Their relationship is not that different from the show itself, if anything Kevin is just more tired and affectionate.

breakfast doodle… actually my favorite one I have to redraw it with all of the workers. If I added all of them Roy would be asleep at the table, Bob has a ridiculous amount of pancakes on his plate, Garcia is practicing his jokes at the table, and Ignacio is a victim of those jokes. I would involve Radford and Rick, however they don't live at the circus and wouldn't be interested in a sleepover. Actually scratch that, Radford would be down if he got to bunk with Kevin.

Happy fella is massive.

Kevin can throw daggers with his mouth, he can actually do a lot of stuff with his mouth, he can even write. He can also write with his feet but I am NOT drawing that!!

Streber and Patty……… ok I kinda want to make them date but at the same time nooo ewww but also they're cute together but also ewwwwwwwww n00000000

Streber in the tub was too silly for me to pass on drawing, literally look at him in his moist habitat omfg. I wish I could show the whole drawing but like. The whole piece is everyone taking a bath being butt naked and I doubt that I can post that lmao.

I am so tired and need to sleep it is 2am i have school smh

[johnwickb1tsch]

The Girl Next Door - V

A Constantine x FemVampire!Reader (feat John Wick!) fic based on this imagine. all chapters warnings: nsfw, blood, biting, violence, divider by animatedglittergraphics

5.  fight the good fight

When you wake again you are bouncing, bent in half slung over a man’s shoulder; the vampire hunter’s. You can tell from the intoxicating scent of his cologne, his sweat, his blood–him. It’s like catnip to you, and for a moment you just want to go back to sleep, and let him take you wherever he’s taking you. 

That’s a very bad idea, of course, and good on you for recognizing it through the haze of bloodloss and whatever other hold he has over you. You still do not understand what he is, or why he has such power over you. 

From what little you can see, it seems like you’re in a dark alley. There are sirens in the distance–the aftermath of the massacre in the club, you presume. He has got you far away. How long have you been out?

You struggle again, managing to worm free and get down, before the vampire hunter pins you against the wall of the building. “Stop that, you’ll hurt yourself,” he grouses, annoyed. He seems in much better shape than before, having stolen your blood. You, on the other hand, feel so weak you can barely stand. 

“Let go. Please let me go.” 

You must sound so pathetic that even this brutal killer softens for you. His grip changes slightly, holding you up against the wall by your waist. You have no delusions, however, that that can change in an instant. Yet…he’s looking at you with those sad dark eyes, like a man drowning. Even with the splatter of blood across his face and the crust of it dried in his long dark hair–he’s so handsome it hurts, and your fingers clench in his jacket, torn between pulling him closer and pushing him away. 

“I’m not going to hurt you, vampling. I saved you.” 

“You…ate me!” 

There is a tick at the corner of his well-formed mouth, betraying his amusement. 

“I took too much. Here, have some back.” He unbuttons his shirt further at the throat to display the strong column of his neck. Your vision zeroes on his jumping pulse like a laser sight, and you notice that intoxicating scent engulfing you again. It’s warm spices and your favorite flowers and pure man–it’s so good that you want to mold yourself to him and never let go. 

It’s a good trick, for a vampire hunter, and at least you are conscious enough to know now that it is a trick. 

“Stop that,” you scold, squeezing your eyes shut as you try to fight it.  

“I can’t help it,” he answers, his voice gone low in a way that shuts down your brain and skips straight your loins. He leans closer, his forehead nearly touching yours, engulfing you with the pure size of him and his hair swinging down to brush your face–he also smells like blood, which does not help you at all. “It’s…you. It’s us.”

“No,” you answer, mostly because you're afraid of someone having that kind of control over you, again. 

“It’s…rare,” he admits. “Who are you?”

“No one,” you insist. “I’m just a girl…who’s really good at being in the wrong place at the wrong time.” And really good at keeping a soft spot for the wrong man. You cannot stop yourself from thinking about John in that moment, and how just one night with him flung you into this strange and terrible supernatural world. Would you change it, if you could? Will there ever come a time, when the thought of him does not feel like talons digging your heart out of your chest? 

“Hmm. Maybe.” He lifts his hand to his throat, and you watch as his fingernails lengthen to sharp points, perfect for breaking his own skin in one neat, bloody line. “Here, milaya. My apology to you.” 

That ruby welling of his life’s essence smells marvelous, and you want to seal your mouth on it more than you’ve wanted anything in a good long while. Somehow, you manage to shake your head, even if minutely. “No, you’ll…enthrall me again or something. I don’t trust you.” 

He sighs. 

“I admit that I want you,” he acknowledges reluctantly. “But you need blood.”

“Yes. Let me go, and I’ll go get some. Again.” It annoys you in that moment that the efforts of your hunt all went to this man’s benefit. Dhampiro, don Juan had called him. Dhampir, you translate to English. Not human, by his own admission. 

Obviously.

He smirks a little down at you. “I saw you feed earlier. Why did you pick him?”

“He killed his wife.” 

“Ah. You like to play jury and executioner.”

“I didn’t kill him.” 

“You’ve killed others though. You’re sloppy about it too.” 

“Am not.” 

He laughs at you, a short, amused, huff, which is as good as an ‘are so’.

“What do you care?” 

“The High Table might start to care, if you make a big enough spectacle of yourself. Naughty little vampires get a visit from the Boogeyman, you know. You aren’t supposed to draw attention. There are rules.” 

“I don’t…know what any of that means,” you’re loathe to admit. 

There’s so much John Constantine could have chosen to fill you in on. Maybe he thought you’d figure it out on your own. Or maybe…he has as much trouble thinking straight around you, as you do him. If he felt a fraction of what you did, when this man before you took you–it’s no wonder you scared John off. Surrendering to that would not be easy for a man like John Constantine. 

“I’d say you need a coven to teach you, but considering what I’m going to do to the locals here…you’d better stick with me.”

“You’re…going to kill them all?” you ask, more intrigued than horrified by the thought. 

“Yes.” There is zero doubt in this man that he can do it, too. After what you saw…you guess you agree with him. Constantine is dangerous, but he could never wreak the sort of massacre this man unleashed in the club. 

And here you are, in his grasp. Well done. 

“Why?”

“Don Juan’s scheming to overthrow the High Table. They don’t like that.” 

“Wait, wait.” A hunger pang washes through you, and you grip his jacket a little harder, your knees weak. The blood dripping down his beautiful throat smells so good, but you realize this might be your chance to finally get some answers. “Who the fuck are the High Table?” 

“How do you not know that?”

“Why does everyone always ask me that instead of just fucking telling me the answer?” you snipe, practically vibrating with frustration. 

“You really have been so alone this whole time?” he asks, his dark eyes inexplicably softening for you. He looks down at you, cupping the side of your face with a paw of a hand, stroking your cheek with his thumb. Maybe it just feels good to be handled like you are something precious, rather than like a farm animal. Or maybe…you are losing your mind, but you have to close your eyes again, shielding yourself from the weight of that blackhole gaze.

“Yes.” You’re not proud of the way your voice cracks as you utter that one word. You hate it, that you think of John, and how he said he’d help you, but mostly he just disappeared on you. You know he has his own life, and his own problems…but he practically abandoned you, all while living right next door. 

It was a good trick, truth be told.  

“That’s a hard way to live. I would know.” His thumb is still stroking your cheek, and it feels so good, and you know this is madness. It has to be a trick. Everything is a fucking trick, with these guys. And yet…it’s as though you can feel this man’s loneliness, the weight of his solitude pressing down upon you, every time you look into his eyes. 

Maybe it’s because he kills everyone, you remind yourself, marveling at your unflagging ability to empathize with the most unavailable men you can find. 

“The High Table?” you prompt again through gritted teeth, trying not to give in to the urge to pull him close, to hide in the bend of his neck, to lose yourself in the heady taste of him and forget everything else. 

“They rule the Underworld. You. Me. Everything that goes bump in the night answers to Them.” He tells you this without condescension, and you could kiss him for that alone. 

“Demons too?”

“No, they’re Hell’s problem. Usually.”

“Then…the High Table are vampires?”

“Vampires. Weres. Sirens. Fey.” He tilts his head in thought. “I’m sure I’m missing something.”   

You nod, trying to digest this information while you are so starved you can hardly think. He’s named more things you didn’t even know existed, but you shouldn’t be surprised at this point. But then…if demons are Hell’s purview, what system of belief do the rest of them answer to? The magnitude of this question makes your head spin. Finding out that the Christian God was real was wild enough for you. What about the rest? 

“Wait…does this mean…all the Gods are real?”

Your leap of logic to the biggest existential question known to man seems to amuse him, the corner of his mouth curling for you. “Malyshka,” he scolds you softly. “You really want to discuss this here? Come on.”

He seems to think he’s taking you somewhere, but you resist again, bracing against the wall.   

“I’d rather…go home, if it’s the same to you.” you admit, winning yourself a tired sigh.

“I can’t…let you do that yet.” 

“Why not?”  

Again, he strokes your face with that big hand, and you feel as though he’s looking into your very soul. 

“You remind me of someone I once knew,” he admits. “A long time ago.”

Someone he lost, you infer from the longing that is woven into those words. Why does that make your heart ache for him?

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. “But whoever she was…I’m not her.”

“No,” he agrees, but he tilts his head to examine you, like you are an amoeba under a microscope.  

“But the universe moves in circles, and something is happening here.” He inhales, and you see a flash of that eerie electric blue in his irises again. “I have to know what it is.”

Whatever you meant to say in answer is swallowed up by his mouth lowering to yours, a kiss that is somehow demanding and languorously slow. He claims your lips for his own, holding you to him as his tongue slides into your mouth, teasing you like you’ve done this a thousand times before. Maybe you don’t need to breathe, but he leaves you breathless all the same, overwhelmed by that pheromone scent and his hands on you, one paw at the back of your head guiding your mouth to his neck. He tastes like a miracle, strong and heady and so delicious as you drink him down mouthful by mouthful. His blood is so potent you feel your strength begin to return just from the first swallow, and the rest is pure high. 

You start to see some things, about this man whose blood is in your mouth. You see flashes of a forbidding dark forest, and fighting, so much fighting. A quaint little cottage in the woods, so humble, so warm. There is a woman whose touch feels like sunshine. ‘Yelena,’ he calls her. And with her hands in his hair and a smile on her lips she calls him…

“Jardani?”

 He jerks back to look at you with haunted eyes, pinning you to the wall with his big hand spanning your chest. Drunk on the want of him, you whine like a thwarted kitten, trying to return to the bloody font of his throat. He searches your face as though desperate for the answer to some crucial riddle written upon your features. “How…?” But does not give you the chance to answer, his mouth crashing over yours again with a new ardor, gripping you so hard that even you will have bruises. 

You cannot think. 

There is only the taste of him, intoxicating and wonderful and you cannot stop yourself from pulling at his clothes, holding him to you. You want to climb him, devour him, be inside him, as surely as his lightning-charged blood is raging through you. 

“Fuck,” you hiss when at last you manage to pull away, not for breath but just a break from this madness. What the fuck is he doing to you?

“Yeah?” he asks, seemingly with all seriousness, hoisting you against the wall with hands on your thighs like you weigh nothing at all. Your legs wrap around his waist out of instinct; he pins you with his hips, his manhood rock hard against your center. He grinds against you, his lips on your neck again, teasing open the wound he left earlier, and you can’t help but moan, soaking wet and aching to be filled. In that moment you don’t care that you’re in a dirty alley with a man you don’t even know. You know the heart of him, and right now you would swear unequivocally that he belonged to you. 

“Wow. You High Table assholes sure know how to treat a lady.”

The sound of that familiar voice makes you freeze, some small modicum of sanity returning to you. 

Your would-be lover is less civil, snarling at the newcomer in the alley. “Not a good time, Constantine.” 

“No time like the present, Wick. Put her down.”

With his attention fixed somewhere else, some modicum of clearer thought returns to you. Your first stop is pure mortification. 

There is John, standing tall with his legs spread in his usual black and white suit, and to his shoulder he is holding a large, golden…cross gun? Like he totally intends to use it if he has to. 

The sight of him makes your heart ache with longing. No tricks. No magic. You just…adore him, even while wrapped up in another man’s arms, and you realize you are as hopeless as you are smitten. That connection between you glows again. You feel it in your chest, and it helps clear the lustful ardor that a moment ago gripped you so completely.

Dhampir magic is some scary shit.

The vampire hunter–Jardani?–Wick?–looks at you as though you’ve said something out loud. His eyes narrow; he doesn’t seem to like it one bit. He does put you down, but holds you in front of him like a shield, his big hand at your throat. 

“Never thought the John Constantine would turn vampire’s familiar. Who knew?” taunts the dhampir behind you. 

“What?”

 Both men ignore your question, fixed on each other in this standoff. 

“Call it what you want,” Constantine answers stonily. “I’m the one holding the gun. Let her go.” 

“I don’t want to.”

“I see that. Nice, you always gotta use your Blood Lure to get laid?” 

“Hardly. Your little vampling here is a special girl.” 

“Yeah. But she doesn’t belong to you, Wick, so let her go.” 

“You love her?” 

Wide eyed, you can’t stop yourself from fixating on John at that question, gone grave-still in Wick’s unrelenting grasp. 

In answer, John mostly just grinds his teeth, his lower jaw jutting. “It’s complicated,” he finally admits, and though that’s never a good answer from a man, your treacherous undead heart still skips a beat.  

“I think she deserves better than it’s complicated.”

“Not from you, half breed. Let her go.” 

You feel Wick tense behind you, and you remember the absolute whirlwind of carnage he caused in the club a few blocks away, that supernatural berzerker rage that mowed down vampire after vampire. John is formidable, but you can’t help but think no one can stand up to that and live. “Please,” you say, appealing to the wall of a man behind you. “Please, just let us go.”

Wick growls deep in his chest–a chilling, primal sound that resonates through you, your every hair standing on end. 

His grip upon you flexes, as though his physical being abhors the very idea of it. You’re not really afraid for yourself now. You’re afraid for John, and unbidden you start to cry those bloody tears. “I love him,” you say in the most hushed whisper you can muster, and the moment it leaves your lips you know it’s true, and maybe it has been true since the night you made that grouchy man dinner, and he made you feel like you mattered to someone in this big mean city. “Please don’t hurt him.”

Somehow, this is the thing that seems to call this dangerous man down. For a moment his grip around your waist tightens; he inhales your scent deeply, his nose behind your ear sending a warm thrill down your spine. He speaks low, though you think John can probably hear him anyway. “He doesn’t look good, vampling. I won’t have to wait long for you.” 

Suddenly, he’s just gone. Disappeared into the shadows, as though he is made of night. 

Unsupported, you stumble, and fall right on your butt. 

John looks around warily with the strange gun at the ready, sweeping the alley like he can’t believe the dhampir had actually retreated. Slowly he crosses to you, impossibly tall from your vantage of the ground. He seemingly reluctantly offers you a hand. “You ok?” 

“No,” you answer truthfully, taking his hand, the warm strength of his grip a welcome boon. When he pulls you to your feet you want more than anything to just be in his arms. 

But all he offers you is a hard stare, and a brusque, “Come on,” as he pulls you towards the other end of the alley. 

It’s complicated, he’d said.  

Why does that have to feel right then like he hates your guts?

You’re getting tired of crying for this man. You remind yourself of this as the ball of despair rises in your throat and your eyes sting like mace. 

Did he hear you? If he heard your heartfelt confession to the dhampir, even if it saved his life…he did not like it at all. 

[irregularcollapse]

for the kiss drabble ask, 38 for clegan!! (38's is this: …because they’re running out of time. it feels beautifully angsty)

i'm going to cheat!! because! i wrote this for a christmas fic that i may or may not finish on time. but it fits the prompt! and maybe has some of the requested angst. i've been mulling this prompt over and over since you sent it, and i think the concept wormed its way into my planning for this fic. and hopefully if i make it known that i'm writing this, i can guilt myself into finishing it on time! perhaps!

requisite context is that Bucky is about to get on a plane (to LONDON!!!) and go away for a year (or will he?). he is around 23 years old, and Gale is around 20.

this is currently not proofread or edited! still very much in the working stages! but a little preview of something Christmassy.

38. ...because they're running out of time.

“It was your idea, Buck. You told me to go.”

“For a month or two, not—It’s a whole year, John. And maybe it don’t seem like long right now, but you’re gonna—”

“Forget you? Come on. Babydoll,” he croons, maybe a little hammed, and it turns out Bucky is the one looping arms around Gale’s neck and tugging him in, kiss landing on his cheekbone. “How could I?” When Gale breathes out, it huffs and shakes, warmth stuttering over Bucky’s neck. His arms come up, wrap around Bucky’s middle, vying for closer contact against the barrier of his backpack. Some jostling, and he shoves it out of the way, arms locking in a solid brace.

“I know you—you ain’t the pen-pal type. And you’re gonna meet people.”

“Buck, baby, don’t think like that, alright? It’s only a year.” When Gale doesn’t reply, only drops his forehead to Bucky’s shoulder—another way of not looking Bucky in the eye—he finds himself gritting a sigh. “You should come with me.” The shake of Gale’s head is almost immediate, and he doesn’t straighten.

“You know I can’t do that.”

“Fuck, Gale. I don’t know, then. I—” He sucks his teeth, shifting until he can drive Gale backward by the shoulders before tripping fingertips over his hardened jaw. There aren’t tears in his eyes. There’s not much of anything at all, just that crystal emptiness. Bucky’s palm slots against his jaw the way it always has; neat, easy, object and receptacle. He tucks some of Gale’s hair behind his ear without thinking about it, just something his fingers know how to do. “If I’m going to bet on anything, I’m going to bet on us, Buck.”

Gale’s eyes are huge, and hollowed, shadowy with what could be the lack of sleep: they’d stayed up all night after the bon voyage get-together, talking, and fooling around, and then he’d spent most of the morning checking everything in Bucky’s suitcase. His silences stretched as the day went on, until the drive to the airport had him only humming as punctuation to anything Bucky said as he drove. The rose-gold of his complexion looks grayish and murky under the halogen lighting. Even his lips are pale, held tight but seeming to sag.

“Don’t say that. You don’t know.”

“And you don’t, either.” Maybe Bucky is trying, a little bit, to push a smile onto Gale’s face with the way his thumb rubs at the corner of that drooping mouth. Still a sweet thing, pouting and pretty, but it’s miles from the devoted sadness that Bucky fantasized about: Gale looks as though he could throw up. “You know something I do know?” The grip on Gale’s face is more of a guide now, keeping his head straight. Bucky can’t do anything about his gaze, which does drop and flicker even as his hands come up to wrap around Bucky’s wrists. “I know I love you a whole lot, and I’m not a quitter. Not when I worked so hard to get you, huh?” He tucks away another wisp of Gale’s hair, lingering a moment in trailing through the length of it to his shoulder with meditative fingers. He’d dreamed of this as well, in the months before making his move. There’s no giving it up, no possibility of it, not when Gale leans into his touch like that even while looking so drained of all his light.

Bucky swallows, and a jagged rock works its way from the back of his tongue through his chest and into his stomach.

“I’ll be back at Christmas, for a bit. I’ll come back, alright? It’ll be you an’ me, same as always. C’mere, baby.” He can feel the downturned slope of Gale’s lips against his own, and the wetly quivering breath that Gale draws in, but he does kiss back. He kisses back, and a TSA agent is shouting to remind everyone in the queue to remove their shoes, and a big bubbling family are all talking over each other, and there’s a final boarding call crackling across the PA system, and Bucky’s heart is throbbing and thumping in his ears, but when Gale murmurs something into his mouth, he thinks that it might be, “Don’t count on it.”

(from these kiss prompts!)

[unicyclehippo]

touch

‘you know i’m like this all the way down, don’t you? it isn’t - it isn’t an act, i do laugh it off sometimes dear, it can be terribly funny but. i am like this. forever. and it’s—could you—do you think you might be able to withstand that for a long time? i should like to be with you for a long time but it would depend on - on when you get exhausted, you see, because i must live with this or - ha - not live with, i suppose, but survive, contend, with this for however long i shall live but you, well.’ laudna’s twists her face into graceful acceptance. soft, understanding, hardly sad at all. it’s very easy to do, once you have the trick of it. ‘you needn’t. deal with this. the bark and the hair and the nails. the popping joints. the ichor, the aches, the smell, the stares, the rot.’ the word drops between them, gross, embarrassing, like she’d spat by accident. her teeth are hatesharp in her mouth. ‘the teeth,’ she adds.

imogen looks up from the book she studies with such careful, wonderful intent. so smart. she quirks a brow, amused. ‘i know what you are, laud. you forget we’ve been travellin’ together awhile now?’

‘no, no.’ her stomach twists, her hands twist, knot, roots. so is she, rooted in place. ‘i know, dear, i only mean to remind you—should you need a moment to yourself, or, or should something in particular sicken you—‘

‘laudna.’

she sinks low. imogen isn’t listening. of course not. she is kind. she lo-hmm. yes, well, laudna can surmise imogen likely loves her. which is, well, lovely! but they haven’t been in love for very long and laudna has never done it before, romance, love, but she knows herself. how she clings to things. she knows herself. love to her is like…tar. sticky and black, bubbling and pouring up and up around their ankles their calves their knees her beautiful knees. if imogen doesn’t know that now then gods help her, what if she drowns her—them—in it? and she would, imogen would stay with her she would be pleased by it, even, because she loves her, but there is something wrong with it. impossible to know if it has always been this or if it’s all the death and the accessories she’s obtained through it—lady d, trauma, blah blah blah—but she thinks she has a capacity for love like a pyre, grease-fire and rising choking smoke; like a hungry dog, snapbite shut around the hand outstretched. and she knows what she wants for imogen, the kind of love she deserves, and how far it is from what she has to offer.

‘what are you afraid of, honey?’

laudna nibbles at her bottom lip. she takes up the bone she has been carving and turns it between her fingers, not wanting to see the moment imogen sees her, maskless, exposed.

‘i want to hold you until we both die,’ laudna says, sad and sweet. ‘i want to lay down in a grave with you side by side and i shall never move again and every worm that comes to eat us up will be little versions of us, because they’ve fed on us, and they will be in love and they’ll feed all the farms and chickens and we’ll be a thousand souls in love. i want to open up your scars and see what is under your skin, what your magic does under there. i want,’ she says, and folds her elbows close to her rotten chest, folds herself small, words small, so not a page stirs, not another soul could be stirred by what she admits. ‘i want to taste it. i want to grow into a tree and grow around you like armour like a second skin so you are always safe and maybe grow taproots, grow into you. through you. i want you as part of me forever. i want to touch you, i want to always be touching you, i want you to never be able to move without feeling me beside you, i want you to crack me open and see how vile it is inside of me and plunge in neck deep and when you struggle to get out, i want to hold on.’ she pauses. ‘i want to dislocate my jaw.’

imogen sits very still. her eyes very dark. she lets out a slow breath, pink tongue flicking out to wet her lips. ‘what-‘ she clears her throat. ‘what does that last one have to do with me?’

‘it doesn’t really. but. i’ll always be quite horrible to be around and i want you to be with me anyway.’

[sibmakesart]

hello! i really love your art & animations! i'm not sure if someone has asked this already but: what do you use to animate? & how long have you been animating for? do u know of any tutorials/classes? (i'm a beginner learning on my own atm!)

hi ! thanks a lot :D

Software wise it depends, procreate for the little sketchy animations, toon boom story board and harmony for bigger projects, sometimes blender even ^^ and unity for work, but its special for video games, i even animated a lot on photoshop when i started !!! never again !!!

i composite in after effect or premiere, depending on what needs to be done, sometimes both for big stuff, but if youre learning animation, focus on the basics before the aesthetics (you can fumble your way into compositing way more easily than anim)

ive been animating on and off for 5 years, 3 of wich were in animation school (during which we surprisingly did not animate much lmao) i got this film out of it tho lol

as for tutos....

i cannot recomend enough The Animator's survival guide, you ccan find the free pdf on the internet, and a bunch of people explaining and showcasing it on yt, its basically the bible for 2d animation

this vid is also very good to get a feel of animation, and the basics, the guy also has v good classes on his channel

but basically the best way to learn is to animate ! a lot ! and look at animations you like, download them and look at them frame by frame : how does the timing work, how doess that character moves, etc

ACT IT OUT ! FILM YOURSELF IN YOUR ROOM DOING STUPID SHIT ! ANIMATE IT ! (believe me, im as sad as you that this is the answer to good anim... but it is...)

and what kind of anim do you like to make ! fights ? chara acting ? sfx ? theres a LOT in which you can specialize (if making a living out of it is your goal) so play around in a cheap/free/cracked software and see what you like and what works for you !

animation is a very complete field : you gotta know perspective, anatomy, acting, composition, exercising any of these skills ultimately makes your animations better !

3d anim is a whole other can of worm, but (IMO) still requires 2d basics,

TO CONCLUDE :

just go ham on doing weird shit and consume, consume,consume animation : short gobelin/carlarts films, all of richard williams filmography, obscure russian animated movies from the 70's, youll ALWAYS learn something, thats how you learn best

Happy creating !! animation is AMAZING the way i felt the first time i made something that MOVES ? unparralleled

[allineedisonedream]

omg i stumbled across your blog recently and your art is gorgeous!!! i love the style and the way you draw dick in particular so much!

also i couldn’t stop thinking about your tangled au it’s so clever! it got me thinking of an au of your au (if that’s presumptuous or annoying feel free to ignore this ask lol). but it always bugged me slightly in the original tangled that rapunzel could remember stuff from when she was a baby bc babies can’t do that lol (obv she also has magic glowing hair so suspension of disbelief and all). but what if dick was actually older when slade (or court of owls tbh take your pick) kidnapped him? like he came under bruce’s care just like in canon after his parents died, and was around long enough to become brothers with jason, and tim had just been adopted when dick and bruce have a fight and dick storms off. not as bad as comics and bruce doesn’t kick him out bc he’s not an ass lol, but maybe dick wants to do more with his powers and bruce is overprotective, so dick storms out fully intending to come back, but slade has been watching him and takes this chance to kidnap him. and when bruce goes looking for him all he finds is a bloodstain and no dick.

and obviously dick is very keen on escaping the creepy dude who’s kidnapped him, but slade brings him to the basement of the tower and begins to torture/brainwash him sort of like the apprentice arc. and over time bc slade sucks and is good at the whole brainwashing thing, dick slowly looses his memories and eventually can’t remember a life outside of the tower at all. and he continues to grow up in the tower with slade as his “father” and he always has this sense that something isn’t quite right, but he can’t put his finger on it. like he has all these weird torture-like scars that he can’t remember getting, but slade tells him that it was from when he was young and before slade rescued him, and that’s why the world is so scary and dangerous and he has to stay in the tower where slade can protect him. and ofc he does bc slade loves him and wouldn’t lie to him right? and he doesn’t know why the name richard doesn’t fit him quite right, or why his heart races when slade appears unexpectedly (that’s how love works right?). but he stays in the tower like he’s supposed to until wally and roy show up.

and slowly after traveling with them he begins to get weird flashes of both painful and good memories, and strange sensations of deja vue. while meanwhile bruce is still all brooding and mourning bc it was his fight that led dick to run away. and added angst is that jason and tim actually remember and miss dick, even though tim had just started to get to know him. and damian is angsty bc he’s the only one never to have met dick (handwavy on the ages just like dc lol). meanwhile the kingdom still remembers and mourns the charismatic adorable prince that they lost.

and then when slade eventually catches up to and captures wally and roy, dick offers to give himself up and promises never to escape if slade spares them. and it’s extra sad bc he finally remembers what he’d be giving up. he remembers bruce and alfred and his brothers, and he remembers all the trauma slade put him through, and he’s willing to go through it all again to save wally and roy (bc is it really dick grayson if he isn’t super self sacrificing lol). and ofc it eventually ends happily and dick is delighted to go back to his family with his new friends and see his old brothers and meet his new brother all with a new haircut.

but yeah overall your au wormed its way into my brain and i couldn’t stop thinking about it lol, it’s so good!!!!

Ahjajfk thank youuuu<3

And OMG, this is amazing! Beautifully written, yes, absolutely love all the details, especially Slade's and Dick's relationship in all this. I've actually thought about him being taken later on so Tim and Jason would also remember Dick. But I think I started overthinking everything and made it way too complicated (I think I wrote about 20 pages of notes and stuff, I kinda got lost in them. I was/am pretty obsessed with this AU), so I just reeled back a bit and stayed close to the plot. It also simplifies things; I don’t have to rewrite the whole story, which, with my overthinking skills, would take forever. 💀

And that part with Slade making Dick forget who he was is great. I kept the whole AU pretty open with some stuff for imagination. My running idea at the moment is that he got sick when he was 8, so Bruce found the flower, and later Slade kidnapped him, making him forget everything and thinking Slade is his father.

But yeah, OMG, this is awesome. I totally love it. I tried to make it as detailed as possible story-wise, but at the same time, I really needed to limit myself to finish fast because I was scared I would lose interest or don’t have the patience haha But Now I’m kinda even more excited about how people will react to the next chapters. 👀

[sosoribro]

hey hey shut up im not done being cringe about rouxls yet. stage whatever: BIG LORE HEADCANON

ITS UNDER THE CUT CUZ ITS KINDA LONG AND YAPPY

so basically what if he is kinda just

a guy

who isnt very logically smart

but is still just a guy

right so

what if he only became the duke of puzzles because king just saw the fanciest guy there and assumed he would do a good job

and you see what if rouxls desperately wants as much power as possible because he is horribly afraid of stepping out of line BECAUSE OF king's takeover and thats why he wants to be correct and right all the time which we know because hes always switiching sides

so what im saying is rouxls was just some fancy moderately-powerful guy in the castle until king took the whole place over and threw him in charge of puzzles and ROUXLS SAID NOTHING HE DID NOT CLARIFY THAT HE WAS NOT A GOOD PICK AT ALL, AND THAT WAS BECAUSE HE WAS SCARED TO DISAGREE WITH THE KING BUT ALSO BECAUSE HE LOVES HAVING POWER BECAUSE THAT MEANS HE CAN............ look look im gonna say it im gonna say it MAKE HIS OWN RULES. ROUXLS IF YOU WILL. BECAUSE THAT IS HIS WHOLE THING AS WE KNOW.

so lets recap again

rouxls is a guy

rouxls gets thrown into a higher position of power despite being a horrible choice for it

rouxls says nothing because king scary and power good

rouxls is also nervous all the time wait what?

allow me to elaborate

i think that deep down, WAY WAY WAY DEEP DOWN, rouxls is genuinely likeable

hes just trying very VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY HARD to appear confident and powerful.

see what if before the king got goofy and blah blah blah took over

what if rouxls was just like

very socially awkward (but he lowkey still is)

like he was respected he was fancy he probably played croquet or something he looked after his worm terrarium which he definitely has you cant lie to me

he wasnt dumb he was just not really good at talking to people and also not very logically smart

his intelligence simply resided elsewhere like insects and maybe fancy dancing i dunno i havent asked him

essentially his excessive pride is just to over-compensate for the fact that hes nervous all the time

he doesn't want to display any signs of said nervousness because he feels that if he does, it'll cost him his status and respect

so now another recap

rouxls is secretly (we can all tell actually) a nervous wreck who is scared of stepping out of line and who deep down just wants to ballroom dance and play croquet and maybe teach lancer how to play the piano wait whaaaat????

let's talk lancer.

we know that rouxls genuinely cares for lancer because he asks how he is even when hes still trying to hate the party.

BUUUUT LETS MAKE THIS EVEN CUTER OR SADDER I CANT TELL

rouxls knows how absolutely terrifying the king is and so he kind of always worried about lancer. but when the king began to neglect his son that really made it clear that the kid needed better care.

by now, rouxls was used to acting all high-and-mighty, but at some point he decided to drop the act just a little bit to check on lancer who was probably sat by himself looking a bit sad

and yeah he finds lancer annoying quite a bit of the time but he knows he needs looking after

and often he may genuinely enjoy himself when hes playing with him because he can forget about having to appear smart and powerful

he's still annoyed about the whole "lesser dad" thing tho and the splat noises

now i know what you're thinking "but what about the accent"

who knows, maybe its his real accent, maybe it isnt

but i do think it would be funny if he's been saying "-eth" so much he sometimes accidentally uses the "th" sound instead of the "s" sound e.g "lanther- i I MEAN LANCER"

basically hes slowly giving himself a lisp

now all that is well and good but of course it is mostly just headcanons.

he could just be

well

stupid

and thats funny

but this? its lore

let me cooketh

[quietbluejay]

The Buried Dagger Take 2 #1

Anyways, in doing this I have completely left any objectivity behind at the station. If you're a Garro fan, you're probably not going to enjoy me complaining about him every time he shows up. If you're a Mortarion hater, you're not going to enjoy the simping. If you're a Swallow fan...well I do have a few nice things to say about his writing, but I also have a few harsh things, and some things that are probably unfair! Swallow's writing can be really hit or miss for me, even within the same book.

now on with the show!

man I remember the first time I read the sample, my entire reaction was basically "okay, edgelord" "of COURSE his name is Mortarion" "of COURSE he's mad at his dad" little did I know he would become blorbo

but observe the first paragraphs:

the people of Ynyx don't have mouths! honestly i think one of the book's flaws is that it goes a bit too far into edge and ends up in the silly zone

I'm waking up/I feel it in my bones

blah blah everyone took drugs but it doesn't matter, they're all gonna be dead by nightfall the prose is kind of dancing on the line between purple and evocative

so we're on page 4 and we know a few things about mort: -sir kills a lot -edgy -hates his dad -cares about the Death Guard

lol lmao you know what you thought the perturabo playlist was cringe? the mortarion one is gonna be even cringier

he's breathing in the chemicals i know i made this joke the first time i read it, i don't care, i'll make it again he's so cringe (affectionate) Mortarion looks at the faces of the puny mortals, looking for understanding

dumbass also, heh so he just shoots them all with his fancy energy pistol "Why did Horus send me here?" Mortarion breathes in the chemicals again the tldr is this planet is basically useless strategically or in terms of what they can loot and sending Mort and the Death Guard was a huge amount of overkill

after having actually seen them being buddies in Vengeful Spirit and The Path of Heaven, this is kinda sad little does mortarion know he can't even trust himself it gets a bit into his daemon research he haaates it but the reasoning is that you can't afford to not be pragmatic on Barbarus let's put a pin in this there's a scene I'm thinking of that happens fairly late in the book that'll be interesting to look at

also, Magnus gets described as an "arrogant braggart" my salt is being fed

you could just say "chill", Swallow it's okay doesn't "the chill hand of the immaterium" sound much better? wait i missed a chance to make a joke about the horrors every day Mortarion gets emails

LoreLover:

which Chaos god would give the worst spam e-mails? Tzeentch: Constant phishing attacks and scams. Slaanesh: Shock videos, plastic surgery, extreme fashion adds Nurgle: Nothing but viruses and worms to corrupt your data Khorne: Physically cutting your cables because get outside and fight me panzy.

on the topic of the horrors, Mortarion thinks about possessed!Grulgor who is chilling in a cage right now poor Grulgor also yeah how'd he end up here i really hope it explains in a short story somewhere because what happened in Vengeful Spirit was VERY confusing in vengeful spirit mortarion was like "here have some geneseed" like he was feeding pigeons and plague daemon grulgor showed up Grulgor: let me kill for you, Mortarion Grulgor: please ask me to kill for you Mortarion:….

Mortarion doesn't let Grulgor do it, because a) that would be too easy b) he's worried it's a trap by Chaos

juuuust like dear old dad oh hey ends justify the means take a shot

im back on my anti-consequentialism bullshit again~

LoreLover: Oh, please Mortarion. You guys used goddamn man-reapers instead of normal swords and spears. You lost the pragmatism argument ages ago.

quietbluejay: don't you see, he has to do it it makes things so much easier~ genuinely, why do i like this guy again oh right McNeill tried to make me hate him also he's so dramatic

fight time it doesn't take long though but, how are they gonna get inside the building

it was kind of cool the ground is sand and the dudes were hiding underground so it's like - when you guys were kids, if you walked down those stairs that don't have backs, did you ever have your parents or someone grab your ankles through them? it's like that except it's not stairs sorry i don't know if that made any sense

HES BREATHING IN THE CHEMICALS

i made this joke last time, but I think Swallow's Imagine Dragons CD has a scratch in it also wait how many times has he been described as pallid so far or gaunt

anyways the grenade breaks open the wall of the citadel

Morarg POV! he's picking off any survivors that Mortarion leaves which is like, not that many people lol

a lot of the time there isn't much to do for Morarg but stand and watch sorry "act as witness to the unchained maelstrom that was Mortarion's cold wrath" Morarg is cool with that

there's a bit about all the 7s because it's a lucky number "now seen as a simple tactical nicety"

so in addition to being Mortarion's equerry, Morarg is also the closest thing the Death Guard have to a lorekeeper gene-modified guardians show up and Mortarion kills those two as well owo while Morarg is watching Mortarion kill things, he gets an alert on his phone er, his helmet

so they get to the boss room and it's triggering for Mortarion because it reminds him of the throne room on Terra

yes the final boss is a brain in a jar

welp rip two of the deathshroud get blasted into the magma lake Mortarion: I taste witchery no, literally, he calls it witchery, and he tastes it

geez, calas, don't you know he's got a thing about killstealing? anyways mort squishes the brain Mortarion: you chose this moment to show your face again so dramatic

as much as i'm kinda mocking the edge, it's got a kind of charm to it, you know?

but now it's time for Mort and Typhon to catch up

typhon starting to talk like a daemon lmao the orders are from horus, it's time to attack terra! but first, an actual discussion

but not yet it was too soon "The embrace would come when due. Nothing would stop that from happening" Mortarion is going to get hugged whether he wants to or not!

TemplarWarden: Man really pulling on that 'I don't like you but I kinda like you' brotherly vibe. LoreLover: Tsundere Mortarion

Typhon thinks about how Mortarion bound daemon!Grulgor which is apparently a feat of some skill also heh "satiate his desire for knowledge" whoooo does that sound like

LoreLover then posted a TTS!Magnus meme

I'm going to tldr a silly discussion about 30k characters as FSN characters except to leave you with

Perturabo is like the unholy lovechild of Sola-Ui and Kirei

Typhon has some Sakura similarities (childhood friend. dark secret. starts eating people)

Typhon, you've officially moved into the "creepy" zone

uh oh… the diamonds are a surprise tool that will harm us later

meanwhile, Typhon isn't sure what sort of reaction Mortarion wants him to show about Barbarus being killed by the Dark Angels

TemplarWarden: That's less a foreshadowing or Chekovs gun and more a foresolar eclipse or Chekovs ICBM

Typhon thinks that he would have been among the ones who were angry before, but not any more, not after Zaramund where he found clarity

TemplarWarden: this man has so much edge I'm getting papercuts from it quietbluejay: wait til we get to his childhood

Typhon: anyways we can get vengeance on the Lion at Terra Mortarion: yes

and that ends the first chapter and all i'll do for tonight, don't want to strain the arms next time we're over to the worst subplot ever

TemplarWarden: Ah yay once again the classic primarch twisted logic. Well it doesn't matter to me actually but I'm still gonna do the vengeance.

Arzach (our resident no 1 Mortarion fan): That remind me : in this book and in Dark Imperium, Typhon/us reasons for his betrayal are not pettiness or dislike of Mortarion but almost a brotherly love, a genuine desire of « helping » his friend / brother to be better. And it’s somehow worse.

[liverpool-enjoyer]

hey yall forewarning this is easily the most embarrassing post ive ever made on here. like im not talking normal levels of tumblr cringe/oversharing, i mean youre probly gonna judge me and think somethings genuinely wrong with me. but i really need to get it off my chest so. yolo.

also tldr at the end in case you wanna spare yourself lmao.

mkay so recently i havent been online, because ive been really sad. and the reason im sad is that gavi got a girlfriend. which i realize is probly the stupidest and most juvenile thing to be sad over but hear me out (or dont lmao its a free country do whatever you want).

its not like i ever thought i had a chance with him or anything, im not stupid. but ive known for a very long time that, due to my asexuality (and other things but mostly that), i am never going to have love in my life. so for me, daydreaming and fantasizing about being gavis girlfriend was like,,, how i coped, i guess. it was a form of escapism for me. and now i cant do that anymore bc hes someones boyfriend and fantasizing abt another girls boyfriend just feels wrong. and pathetic.

it doesnt help that all my social medias have algorithmed so that hes all over all my feeds. and to be honest, looking at him just makes me think of his beautiful girlfriend who has everything i could ever want and i feel this horrible awful nauseating feeling in my stomach and i feel envious and sad and a slew of other things. it sucks that someone who once unknowingly made me so happy now does the exact opposite but hey what can you do.

i know it sounds stupid, but i dont think i'll ever feel for someone the way i feel about him. hes the most beautiful person ive ever laid eyes on and oh God i was right this does sound stupid ok lets continue

oh and let me be clear (you hafta read that in obamas voice) im aware that feeling this way toward a complete stranger (or anyone for that matter, but like especially a complete stranger) is EXTREMELY UNHEALTHY. unfortunately, knowing that my feelings and thoughts are unhealthy doesnt stop me from having them.

so yeah. now that ive lost my form of escapism, all i can think about at any given moment is how lonely im going to be. its hard to enjoy much of anything these days when all im thinking about is how im never going to receive romantic love, and now i cant even daydream about dating gavi to cope with it. because all i can think about when i try to is how hard his girlfriend would laugh if she found out some pathetic worm halfway across the world was fantasizing about her man.

so yeah thats it. i know that every time i angst abt my asexuality (which is a LOT like holy shit why do ppl still follow me), my friends tell me that its ok because im going to find someone someday. and i appreciate it, i really do. it means the world. but my friends saying that i'll find love doesnt make it true. plenty of people have died alone and unloved before, and i am going to be one of them.

tldr: a guy ive never met got a girlfriend n im having a depressive episode abt it LMAOOOO

[bitter-sweet-coffee]

hey if you feel comfortable

can you maybe explain the espave ship? like whats the chemistry? what makes you like them and see them working as a couple? (or not lmao)

HI ANON! first of all, it’s totally fine to be on anon for this but jsyk (and everyone else) i absolutely THRIVE on questions about my purple bisexuals. i’ve probably answered this a billion times but that won’t stop me from saying it again because i love excuses to ramble fkdkfkdisidsi

SO, in terms of canon stuff, i have always adored the chaotix and rogues as a group dynamic. WAY before idw did it too (and i personally think they did it very wrong. ian flynn on record states that he hates the rogues and doesn’t want to write them well but i’ll save that can of worms for another day)

anyways, espio and wave have very similar predicaments for their team dynamic. they’re both typecast as the “intelligent, voice of reason” who is often ignored by their (green) leaders which leads to a lot of passive aggressiveness. they’re both extremely arrogant, which is really hard to combat considering they’re both too intelligent to dismiss. wave is a mechamechanical genius who in certain fields, canonically surpasses tails and eggman, one of the world’s best extreme gear riders, brilliant at melee combat, translates ancient runes and artifacts, is an accomplished thief, and will verbally spar you to death. espio is a detective ninja chameleon who can turn invisible, run as fast as sonic and shadow, jump into computers, control the wind a bit, is fluent in 17 languages (which implies he learns a new one every year) and so on.

so like… they’re both OP as fuck while simultaneously ignored by their teams AND the fandom which is really funny (read as: annoying) for me to deal with

anyways, on a deeper level, wave’s neglect is… really sad. i talk about it a lot, both in-lore and in terms of how the fandom treats her, and the worst part is that it’s played for jokes. a lot of people interpret her as wanting to lead the rogues which directly contradicts the canon: she wants JET to be a good leader and puts all her energy and effort into mentoring him so he can lead on his own. hijacking the rogues wouldn’t do any good and she genuinely thinks he can grow into his position despite being so young. and yet… she’s ignored. she does so much for the team and really tries to be patient, but can you blame her for being so jaded and dismissive when all her life’s work goes shoved aside and played for jokes? that cutscene in riders really always upset me because she’s clearly giving a long speech with good intentions, and jet just… walks away. and her reaction implies people do this to her all the time.

cutting away to espio for a second, i’d like to point out that as the knuckles chaotix manual states, espio was the ONLY chaotix member to be a detective before they formed. long before we had the chaotix as a team, espio was already a PI who was on angel island to explore its history, culture, and suspicious activity. this was always who he is, because he is inquisitive and perceptive by his very nature. his name in spanish MEANS “i spy” and its also short for espionage. THIS IS HIS WHOLE LIFE! so yeah, espio loves to ask questions. it’s also noted he has a rivalry with knuckles because he’s jealous the echidnas have such a rich and extensive cultural history, considering he doesn’t. note that he eventually became a ninja as if to appear like he does LMAO

okay, so. we have a character with rich cultural history who is extremely intelligent and neglected, and then another character who is obsessed with rich cultural history who is extremely intelligent and loves to listen to people.

… see what i’m proposing here? LMAO

espio and wave, despite being on opposite ends of an affluent spectrum, are cut from the same cloth in terms of their team dynamics, and the cores of their individuality answer one another. you can even look at their chase for money as a compelling foil, while also taking into consideration the detective/thief dynamic.

espio, unlike most characters, would not only be very interested in everything wave has to say, he’d actually be intelligent enough (and a very fast learner) to actually ENRICH the dialogue. wave finally has someone to talk to, and he’s not exactly innocent, so she has an arrogant verbal sparring partner that’ll humble them both through their discussions.

it’s here i’d also like to point out that espio is taken for granted too. maybe not as much as wave is, as it’s very hard to find a character treated as poorly by her team while also getting no pathos, but espio is ignored in his own ways. looking past how he’s dismissed at times, espio is character-typed by everyone around him. yes, he’s a ninja, but that’s not all he is. yes, he’s the voice of reason at times, but he’s also extremely vain and reckless with canonical anger issues. people want to talk about how he could be some great shinobi warrior, forgetting that the only reason sega made him a ninja was because naruto was popular at a time 😭 i’m not saying he’s a poser and a weeb, but he clearly puts up this front of being a super serious guy… which works. too well. it fools most of the fandom LMAO. but espio is actually really funny, witty, cocky, and playful. dare i say whimsical? he likes CAMPING, GUYS! THAT’S ONE OF HIS INTERESTS, YET I SEE NO CONTENT OF HIM BUSTING OUT A PORTABLE GEORGE FORMAN GRILL IN THE MIDDLE OF MYSTIC JUNGLE, DO I? anyways, espio’s persona is a lie, and yet if anyone were to question it, he’d be more like himself. but no one ever does. they take his front as fact and never consider delving into who he is as a person, beyond the act he has on. and it’s not like he’s good at hiding it either, sonic x showcases how stupid he really is at times LMAO

okay, i’ve zig-zagged around a lot, but it’s safe to say i really love both these characters and think they could fix each other

… for the canon series. i personally like to have them make each other worse before getting mildly better, because it’s way more fun to write hehehehe. i’ll save that for another ask because this is already a wall of text, but do ask me more stuff if this hasn’t scared you off, because i love getting to do this!

[marwyn]

i've noticed people seem to believe the dynamic between daemon nettles and rhaenyra is meant to mirrors the dynamic between jaime brienne and cersei but i don't see it....am i missing something?

There definitely are strong parallels between Daemon’s and Jaime’s adventures in the Riverlands, but some serve to provide pointed contrasts as well. I’ve seen people make the comparison you mentioned due to specific lines of Rhaenyra’s and Cersei’s, but I’m inclined to take the former with a grain of salt for several reasons, one being that it was reported by Septon Eustace who “loved [Rhaenyra] little”:

With her skin as pale as milk, Lady Misery appeared before the council in a hooded robe of black velvet lined with blood-red silk, and stood with head bowed humbly as Her Grace asked whether she thought Ser Addam and Nettles might be planning to betray them. Then the White Worm raised her eyes and said in a soft voice, “The girl has already betrayed you, my queen. Even now she shares your husband's bed, and soon enough she will have his bastard in her belly.” Then Queen Rhaenyra grew most wroth, Septon Eustace writes. In a voice as cold as ice, she commanded Ser Luthor Largent to take twenty gold cloaks to the Dragonpit and arrest Ser Addam Velaryon. “Question him sharply, and we will learn if he is true or false, beyond a doubt.” As to the girl Nettles, “She is a common thing, with the stink of sorcery upon her,” the queen declared. “My prince would ne’er lay with such a low creature. You need only look at her to know she has no drop of dragon's blood in her. It was with spells that she bound a dragon to her, and she has done the same with my lord husband.” (F&B, The Dying of the Dragons–Rhaenyra Triumphant)

The queen remembered the Maid of Tarth, a huge, ugly, shambling thing who dressed in man’s mail. Jaime would never abandon me for such a creature. My raven never reached him, elsewise he would have come. (ADWD, Cersei I)

It’s also interesting that the passage in question from F&B exclusively refers to Mysaria with the names used by “her rivals and enemies.” Anyway, Rhaenyra proceeds to send Daemon a letter repeating these accusations and he reacts with sorrow and seems to deny the truth of them:

The prince greeted me politely, but as he read I saw the joy go from his eyes, and a sadness descended upon him, like a weight too heavy to be borne. When the girl asked what was in the letter, he said, ‘A queen’s words, a whore’s work.’ (F&B, The Dying of the Dragons–Rhaenyra Triumphant)

Compare with:

Jaime read it in the window seat, bathed in the light of that cold white morning. Qyburn’s words were terse and to the point, Cersei’s fevered and fervent. Come at once, she said. Help me. Save me. I need you now as I have never needed you before. I love you. I love you. I love you. Come at once. Vyman was hovering by the door, waiting, and Jaime sensed that Peck was watching too. “Does my lord wish to answer?” the maester asked, after a long silence. A snowflake landed on the letter. As it melted, the ink began to blur. Jaime rolled the parchment up again, as tight as one hand would allow, and handed it to Peck. “No,” he said. “Put this in the fire.” (AFFC, Jaime VII)

Daemon’s course of action after Rhaenyra’s letter is to part from Nettles, fly alone to Harrenhal, and commit murder-suicide with Aemond in order to, I would guess, prove his love and loyalty to his wife and queen. Jaime has obviously taken a very different path so far, and while I wouldn’t be surprised if he does reconcile with Cersei after Brienne betrays him to the Brotherhood without Banners, I don’t think it’ll last.

Another point of note is that Jaime’s Riverlands arc also includes his decision to claim paternity of Myrcella, which manifests in a slippage between lover and daughter and thus may or may not shed some light on the cagily-described relationship between Daemon and Nettles:

“…And what is it you like in a woman, m’lord?” “Innocence.” “In a woman, I said. Not a daughter.” He thought of Myrcella. I will need to tell her too. The Dornishmen might not like that. Doran Martell had betrothed her to his son in the belief that she was Robert’s blood. (ADWD, Jaime I)

Maester Norren writes that “the prince and his bastard girl” supped together every night, broke their fast together every morning, slept in adjoining bedchambers, that the prince “doted upon the brown girl as a man might dote upon his daughter,” instructing her in “common courtesies” and how to dress and sit and brush her hair, that he made gifts to her of “an ivory-handled hairbrush, a silvered looking glass, a cloak of rich brown velvet bordered in satin, a pair of riding boots of leather soft as butter.” (F&B, The Dying of the Dragons–Rhaenyra Triumphant)

Based on all of the above I do think the interpretation that Nettles is Daemon’s daughter rather than his lover has merit, and while HOTD isn’t the arbiter of truth for F&B it at least has the opportunity to display in real time events which come to us from various first- or second-hand reports and which are also sometimes contradictory or missing information, and so it’s interesting that the show seems on track to substitute one of Daemon’s legitimate daughters for Nettles. This substitution isn’t ideal but with such a large cast I’m not surprised by changes like these made for the sake of time, which is even more of a concern now that HBO keeps cutting season lengths last minute.

[lakesbian]

i guess it's hard to get a read on how much he actually cares about palatine and dauphine or reciprocates their dislike of him? also why did he say that about "sexual favors"

(this post is about the fanfiction sword and sorcery, which you should read because it's good. it's written by tumblr users shakertwelve and nonplatonicsubtext about their estateverse au, which you can read more about in the estateposting tag on tumblr user shakertwelve's blog. would i ever lie to you about a fanfic recommendation.)

ok ahem. i've posted about alec's opinions on palatine and dauphine before bc i think the dynamic potential there is hilarious and i'm so delighted that they got put into the fic. the fancy frilly little freaques are fiiiighting!

Alec Is So Entirely 100% Certainly Without Doubt more mad about palatine and dauphine than they are about him. it would frankly be more accurate to ask how much victor and amelia reciprocate his dislike, because they are living RENT fucking free in his sad little repressed brain. but, like all of his emotions, it's just not super obvious because of how repressed he is--he feels and displays everything in a very muted way. the posts i linked get into the main bits of Why He Does Not Like Them At All, but to elaborate based on analysis of what's actually in the fic:

“Regent had a run-in with them a while back, before he joined the team,” Tattletale said. “He was new to the city, so he didn’t realize what his costume choice would make people think of.” She gestured vaguely in the direction of the Estate capes. “But he was doing things they don’t do and going to parts of town they stay out of, which caused some confusion. Eventually Dauphine and Palatine tracked him down to have a talk about it. It didn’t go well.”

as we can extrapolate from above, alec's history with them is like this:

he shows up to brockton bay as a severely maladapted, depressed, Generally Unwell cult-escapee on the young (and probably malnourished) side of 13 with effectively nothing to his name but his powers

as a weak cape without a team and zero social or systematic connections to turn to for help, he's forced to do very small-scale villainy just to scrape by enough to survive. and the entire time he is wearing his costume that veritably Screams "i am a special little prince please look at how wonderful i am." jesus christ he needs a hug.

these random cunts, palatine and dauphine, pull up and basically tell him to Fuck Off and stop Stealing Their Family's Schtick

these random cunts are also dressed fancy like him, and dauphine especially is someone alec would identify with fashion-wise, given that it's explicitly stated that her costume is princess-like. "Even with her elaborate costume, she looked more like a child’s princess doll than an actual princess." taylor rags on it, but it's still princess-like

this random fancy cunt, dauphine, is the daughter of...marquis, an incredibly successful, fancy villain with long hair who has a lot of money and lives in a mansion and, from alec's perspective, loves and cares about her dearly and buys her nicey clothes. and beyond just that, she has a brother who--instead of tormenting her & then laughing about it--wears a special fancy gleaming knight costume and bridal carries her around and is so sweet and nicey to her if anything bad happens. like, for example, alec getting pissy at her and tripping her.

we already know alec gets Insanely, Malevolently, Incandescently Jealous over someone he's engaged in hostilities w/ having a nice family. (see: him doing all that shit to sophia). we also know that he isn't very good at recognizing this jealousy in himself. (see: aisha revealing in late worm that alec only realized that he had done all that shit to sophia out of a jealous rage like a week or two later when he was talking to her about it.)

which is to say: alec sees dauphine as being Sorta Like Him, but if he had a 100% ideal family (dashing golden knight brother that takes care of her! rich fancy father who protects them and buys them nice shit! and they all live in a mansion!), and LET ME FUCKING TELL YOU. HE IS SO INSANELY JEALOUS HE HOPES THE ENTIRE ESTATE GETS HIT BY A NUCLEAR WARHEAD AND EXPLODES. ...all subconsciously, of course. he expresses this thru things like mocking her for being "a baby about a little trip" &c--insulting the vulnerability & familial care he certainly wishes he could have, while fully unaware why seeing it annoys him so much.

but i digress. keeping all of that in mind, you can see why alec would be infuriated & jealous towards them even if they were completely neutral towards him. but they weren't neutral towards him--instead, these people he views as being Like Him, But Living Out His Wildest Dreams, approached him to hassle him for accidentally appearing like he was one of them. local loving royal villain family approaches boy who is obviously projecting subconscious desire to be a beloved prince onto his costume design and goes "quit stealing our vibes," boy reacts with a parasocial grudge. his weird complexes about them shall reign eternal. he wishes he had a second, cooler palatine to beat the first, lamer palatine to death with hammers, and then bridal carry him to stand dismissively over dauphine's prostrate form as she weeps over the first, lamer palatine's corpse. and also he wants the second, cooler palatine to be hand-feeding him a bag of chips ahoy the entire time.

...i should stress again, this is alllll more or less entirely subconscious. alec doesn't know what the fuck he's feeling ever, this just comes across as a subdued vague annoyance/disdain for them.

so, why the weird "sexual favors" remark? it genuinely was not intended to be a harassing comment, nor do i think he genuinely would say he believes that marquis prostitutes his daughter if he thought about it for a second. but he does identify with dauphine in the sense that they're aesthetically similar enough for him to be extra-jealous about her. and so upon hearing "dauphine's favor," he takes the meaning of "you can have a favor from my kid" he's most used to as a child who was prostituted by his own villain father, and he projects it onto her. if i want to read into it beyond that, i think he might be unconsciously/impulsively trying to poke a hole in their family--a sort of [hopeful] "marquis sucks :)?" where he'd like to hear that marquis isn't as much of an envy-worthy dad as alec thought. meanwhile from the estate's perspective he was just a creep for no fucking reason. there are other, far more important things for lisa to be paying attention to during this scene, so i don't think she was wasting any time reading alec, but if she Was she certainly would've gotten a good show of severe mental unwellness.