#even I had hamsters as a kid and I made a lot of mistakes and bad choices

[ruminativevagrant]

An assortment of facts about Adam Lanza

Adam's low self image issues began showing during elementary school. he would write the words "loser" and "ugly" on his hands, believed that "everyone else in the world deserved more than he did”, and would hit himself as punishment when he thought he made a mistake. He would sometimes come home with bruises that he would refuse to explain, and Nancy almost sued SHES because she thought he was being beaten by other students.

One of Adam's middle school creative writing assignments got rejected for depicting violence, and he was made to write a poem instead. this poem was apparently so beautiful that it made his father cry.

Adam wanted to be a hamster for halloween as a kid, but they couldn't find hamster costumes, so nancy made one for him.

Ryan remembers Adam being a lot closer with his father as a child. Adam and Peter would routinely spend hours playing with legos in the basement, making up stories and games.

Adam developed an interest in political and economic theory early on and used to be very talkative about these subjects, as Peter recalls: "man, that kid, you couldn't shut him up!"

When Adam was sixteen, he made a meme of Karl Marx (huge beard), Lenin (small beard), Stalin (mustache), and Mao (clean-shaven), with the caption, “Comrades, we must rectify the faltering facial hair standards.” and Peter thought it was so funny that he got T-shirts made of it.

Adam carried a black briefcase instead of a backpack in high school. To avoid other people in the halls he would either turn to walk in the opposite direction, or press up against the wall and clutch his briefcase to himself "like an 8 year old who refuses to give up his teddy bear". He was described by his highschool advisor as "a very scared young boy" and by classmates as being quiet but extremely intelligent, "he was the smartest person I knew, he was probably a genius"

Adam would constantly express his anxiety to his mother, that he felt frightened and unsafe both in public and at home. Nancy told psychiatrists that his fear was so severe that it physically paralyzed him. When being interviewed by psychiatric professionals, Adam sweat through his shirt and was holding back tears throughout the sessions.

One time Peter had mentioned to Nancy that Adam had stopped to tie his shoes when they had been hiking, and Nancy expressed surprise and bewilderment to this.

Adam would have panic attacks in middle school that were so severe that he had to be sent home. In high school these were replaced with "crises" he would have in class, where he would be overwhelmed with hopelessness, give up whatever he was doing and "shut down".

Adam's teacher were advised to keep an eye on him because he "couldn't feel pain", as Nancy had informed them that he might not stop doing something even if it's hurting him.

Peter recalls that as Adam entered his teenage years he would often state how much he missed being a little kid.

Adam routinely checked and compared weather conditions across the country, he wanted to live in Washington because it was the most overcast state and Nancy entertained the idea of them moving to seattle together.

After Adam stopped talking to Peter in 2010, whenever Nancy brought the topic of his father up to Adam he would begin crying profusely and withdraw.

Adam once told a friend that he was "bulky" when he was a child, and that he had fat cheeks, comparing himself to a hamster with its cheeks stuffed.

Adam would sometimes play ddr for up to 10 hours straight, where he would enter what was described as a "trance". Workers at the Danbury theater recall him being unresponsive at closing time, and they would have to unplug the machine in order to get him to stop.

Adam identified as asexual but denounced the label towards the end of his life, claiming to be confused about his sexuality. On a university application form asking for a gender marker, Adam wrote "I choose not to answer".

Adam wanted to own not only hamsters, but also mice. He specifically wanted a brown deer mouse and a white fancy mouse. He would routinely watch youtube videos pertaining to rodents and rodent care, and would give advice in the comments.

One of Adam's top favorite movies was Willard, a movie about an isolated young man who lives in a large house with his mother and befriend rats. In this movie his mother dies in her bed, and the story culminated with him using the rats to enact revenge on an authoritative boss, killing him. Adam also owned a copy of the book that the movie is based on.

[yuzukahibiscus]

 ANIMAL HOUSE # 13 「Towaki Sea x Yuki Daiya」

"TAKARAZUKA Animal House" is a programme where Takarasiennes go to the cafe and introduce their beloved pets. # 13 features Flower Troupe Towaki Sea and Yuki Daiya, along with Daiya’s pet hamster Blan-chan! They have a talk, as they pick five cards of different topics! This episode, Hitoko (Towaki) picked a card on “Their impressions of each other” and they talked about different stories about them. Daiya later picked a card of “Her favourite movie of Blan-chan”. 

Note: This is a rough translation, it may have mistakes and may not be complete, please read it just for reference.

About the hamster:

Daiya: Hamster is Blan-chan or simplied Bu-chan (from the first character) because I got it when its "Paris in the Winter Fog” performance run and the stage was set in France and since [hamster] is pure white, "Blanc” is white in French, therefore "Blan".

Hitoko: I also have 2 cats at home. I thought over if I wanted a dog before, but now I think 2 cats are enough.

Daiya: I also wanted a dog before when I was in primary school but then I considered it may be a lot of work, to walk the dog and so on. But I have a parrot now also which can also repeat what I say!

Impressions of each other

(1) First impressions of each other

Hitoko: Daiya was my shinko role for “Haikara-san” but because that was cancelled, we didn’t get to talk much. But before that, it was one time when  passed by the elevator hall and saw Daiya practising alone [for “Masquerade Hotel”]. After knowing that it was "Flower Troupe’s Yuki Daiya" her first impression was: oh Daiya is great at dancing!

Daiya: I was a Snow Troupe fan before Hito-san transferred to Flower Troupe so I did go to see Snow Troupe shows...but when Hito-san transferred to Flower Troupe, I was happy cause at that time [in Decmber 2019], the “Olympia” team, the “Masquerade Hotel” team, even Snow Troupe [for “Once Upon a Time in America] were all practising in Takarazuka, so I was able to talk to Hito-san!  My first impression was: Hito-san was very charming, in terms of how she interacts with others and her vibe, I was just drawn to that charm!

(2) Nicknames Hitoko: Oh, right you started calling me Hito-san!

Daiya: Yes about that, actually since we were nearby there was a time where Hito-san and Seino-san were practising together... Hitoko: Oh, the Salome scene [in “Dance Olympia”]? Daiya: Yes, and we were just rehearsing on our own and we couldn’t talk to you because you guys are rehearsing, but I saw how you approached Seino-san and said, "Let’s get close and work well together" and I thought "Ah.... I want to speak to her soon...." and then later you told me "It’s ok for you to call me Hito-san" so I was very happy indeed, but sometimes still nervous to say it ... >< Hitoko: On the other hand, since everyone just calls you "Daiya", I was also worried if I should call you the same and in "Haikara-san” performance run I called you "Daiya-kun" but I later also went with calling you “Daiya”.

(3) Birthday presents Hitoko: My first Flower Troupe birthday was spent during "Haikara-san” performance run. Daiya made me a t-shirt and a tote bag as birthday presents. Now I still use that t-shirt and still put yoga mat into the tote bag when she goes warming up. Daiya: I’m so happy you’re loving the presents!

(After a little interruption of Blan-chan running on the wheel) Hitoko: I was also surprised because of course the performance cancellations happened [in "Haikara-san”] and later when I had another birthday, you knit my name on this blanket? and I thought "How did I influence this kid? Why is she making this amazing gift for me, why does she know how to do all this!?" I was surprised and happy. Daiya: Even though now we talked much more, before I wasn’t able to talk to you...because I didn’t have the courage to do so....but now there’s this programme and other opportunities that we can talk and be close to each other! Hitoko: I think it's alright if at first there's some distance, that we're not familiar with each other. At least it's getting better recently!

(4) Daiya’s memory of Hitoko

Daiya: The greatest memory is still "Haikara-san”! Even though it was a short time that we could talk or even didn't get to talk later, but I was thinking "If that was okay"... and feeling so nervous...

Hitoko: True, because that would be your first time taking on my role [in the Shinko]

Daiya: Because I love acting, and I would think a lot and be frustrated over some pain points, such as the awareness and feeling in acting, I felt that it's changed a lot.

Hitoko: I somehow also thought that after hearing my advice, it was memorable to me that you tried to make your characters stand out by thinking of what to preserve and what to change in your style of acting.

Favourite movie of Blan-chan

[urban-witch101]

Hey! So um if you remember I made a request on your Danganronpa Thh ghost au if you could do sdra2 ghost au headcanons. If your still busy that's ok but if you forgot this is kinda like a reminder (Sorry of this sounds rude 😭)

Oh my goodness. I'm so sorry! I completely forgot. Also I got multiple requests for this and that is a foreign concept to me, I'm patting myself on the back for a job well done for the first one I guess.

I want to clarify - this one will be a little different than the other one. This will also be the last one of these I do until I play the third game. This isn't an x-reader. This is also going to be tricky considering the canon lore, so I'm kind of twisting it around instead of just throwing it all out completely. Have fun y'all.

- Danganronpa 2 Ghost AU - "They're Trapped."

Hi! Spoilers ahead. Also, just a big fat trigger warning in general.

When Makoto Naegi set out, against direct orders, to create the Neo World Program, he had good intentions. Rehabilitate the kids, even the questionable ones, to their original state. What he didn't expect were the files to get a little...weird. It didn't seem dangerous. At least, it wasn't until it was already too late.

The worst part is that Makoto would be rewarded with this transgression, this mistake. He outright refused to give the Hope Foundation the program, but when they took it by force, they realized why he hid it.

They were there. They weren't alive anymore, but that doesn't mean a whole lot in a fictional world made of binary coding. This is what they found.

Hajime Hinata is the only one that will greet you upon entering the Neo World Program.

When you first open your eyes on the beach, you'll see clear blue skies for miles, an ocean that looks and sounds just like the real deal, and a bundle of broken code flashing by the trees.

He's had the most sightings of all the students. If you're lucky, he'll even ask for your name.

If he's not there when you first wake up, then check the hotel. He can be seen walking around the cabins, hesitating on certain ones and letting his finger glaze over the mailboxes with their names on them.

His little friend is different. Much different.

9/10.

Izuru Kamukura is the same body with an incomplete personality.

He can be seen by the Ancient Ruins, pacing up and down the halls.

Sometimes he'll ignore you. Sometimes he's snippy and aggressive. He doesn't hurt anyone though, not anymore.

Many of us think that spirits don't want to ask us questions when in reality they just don't have that kind of energy to give anymore.

The Neo World Program flipped that logic on its head.

There was only one person that Kamukura actually talked to, and he asked him all kinds of questions. Who he was. What he was doing there.

Their meeting was solemn, but honest. He was quiet after that.

7/10, a mixed bag.

Gundham Tanaka pops from place to place, but the two main spots you'll find him are the Ranch and Strawberry House.

He's always alone, and he likes keeping it that way.

No animals have reported being around him - no animal noises in the glitches, or any mention of them in his code. Not even his hamsters.

At the Ranch, there are reports of the cows "brushing themselves". Bits of code surround the brush, as if he's specifically keeping the rest of himself hidden. These sightings are common though.

If all else fails, he wants you to know that the animals are taken care of.

There is one report. An anonymous employee went into Strawberry House and found his code in the Tower. They used a device mimicking a spirit box and could hear the constant click of his shoes.

Pacing in circles, and an occasional whistle of an unfamiliar tune. 10/10, harmless and is actually pretty helpful all things considered.

Peko Pekoyama has never been seen once, but it's known that she stays in the Beach House.

When they approached the building, they thought someone was already inside due to the footprints in the sand going in the door. The Beach House was completely empty.

She'll play the flashlight game. She's unresponsive to the spirit box.

The employee decided to wait until the night cycle kicked in, turned out the lights, and sat in the main room quietly.

They didn't hear much, but they did enjoy the quiet. Listening to the wind chimes and the ocean helped them meditate and stay calm in a time that a regular ghost hunter would be depressed about the lack of evidence collected.

After they were done they gave an audible warning before packing up to go, figuring that they weren't getting anything.

It turns out that the Beach House is the only place in the island that gives you a sense of peace. It wasn't programmed to give this atmosphere.

10/10, super chill.

Ibuki Mioda...has not changed at all. She bounces from place to place, but her sightings are mostly in the music venue.

You name it, it has happened in this building.

Equipment turning on by itself, speakers blasting scrambled rock music, something falling from the rafters in the ceiling, etc, etc, etc.

She does everything. She loves the flashlight game. The spirit box became redundant when they figured out that whenever it was in the music venue it would blast rock music. She's spoken through Ouijia Boards with specific messages. She even talks about executions and murders that she's witnessed.

Do you think a ghost could effectively haunt a music venue better? No, you don't. It's Ibuki Mioda.

8/10, somehow the loudest ghost ever.

Teruteru Hanamura is in the kitchen in the old building. There's no record of him ever moving from the old building at all, much less leaving the kitchen.

He's pretty quiet - unless you're a woman.

He reacts to men, but they've never gotten a response on the spirit box with them. He'll turn lights on and off and knock things over.

If you're a woman, there's not more physical activity but he will definitely talk.

He loves to talk. He answers every question that he can. He talks about his mother and her diner, the terror he felt from being stuck on this island with no rhyme or reason, his regret of killing the Imposter instead of Nagito.

He has absolutely no idea who he really is.

His code proves it. Could you imagine the Hope Foundation's reaction to Naegi's and Alter Ego's code actually working?

When asked if he'd ever leave the kitchen, he refused.

"I can't face them...not after what I did."

9/10, very helpful but prepare for emotional damage.

Sonia Nevermind is in the library on the second island.

They weren't able to get her on any devices. Nothing happens when people are in the room.

One of the employees got the idea to leave a camera and a tape recorder rolling there while they explored the rest of the island.

When they came back the tape recorder had been turned off and the camera had been glitched to stop recording about ten minutes in.

In those ten minutes, there was an orb accompanied with code glitches passing through the top corner of the frame. The tape recorder had been recording for two minutes, and all the heard was the sound of someone breathing.

That same employee spent the night in the library alone and they decided to bring a film camera so nothing could be corrupted.

They woke up multiple times throughout the night to sounds of books dropping, a girl crying, and what sounded like mice squeaking. These were later reported as hamster sounds.

The film camera had been set on a timer to go off every hour and take a picture. Only two pictures had something off - one had a dark shadow in the corner and the other was a picture of a mangled wall of binary code. It was translated later.

"Let us out."

8/10, spooky as shit but now we know where the hamsters went.

Akane Owari was last seen by Chandler Beach.

According to many employees, Akane tends to wander. She's never been seen in the same spot twice.

Many have tried to lure her out by coding smells of food to appear, but to no avail. She knows it's not real - she can't eat anymore.

Once she was caught on the spirit box in the hotel restaurant. It picked up sounds of chewing along with weird grunts of frustration. Another time she was in the beach house, making the window in the shower room rattle.

There's not a lot to note about her. She tends to keep to herself and avoids the Hope Foundation employees at all costs.

The only really significant finding happened in the hospital, in her old sick room. Sometimes the lights flicker, and the IV's will start to operate and show a heartbeat despite not being hooked up to a person. An employee was able to quietly play the flashlight game with her, asking simple questions about her and her life.

5/10, quiet but not very helpful.

The Imposter is still in the old building.

They're similar to Akane in the sense of not really interacting all that much, tending to stick to themself and haunt the old building alongside Teruteru.

The few times they did get them to interact were...interesting, to say the least.

They don't seem bothered by the fact that their murderer is literally a room away. "He did what he had to do." Fair enough.

One employee brought a knife to the building - all of their technology went wild; the tape recorder only got bits and pieces of loud static that wasn't there in real time, their flashlights went out, the spirit box wouldn't even turn on, etc. One of the cameras actually burst into flames.

That employee ended up throwing the knife out the door. Everything calmed down almost immediately.

6/10, whatever the fuck you do, don't bring a weapon.

Hiyoko Saionji is consistently found in the hotel restaurant.

She's occasionally been heard at the music venue as well, but the restaurant is her go-to.

She doesn't like the spirit box, but she loves the flashlight game. She will play that puppy all night.

When asked why she stays here of all places, the flashlights go quiet before they start flashing in a pattern.

It seems that she has an affinity for morse code.

"It's where big sis is."

One of the flashlights rolled over to a specific spot in the restaurant, by one of the walls. Right by where Mahiru's shrine used to be.

8/10, harmless but big ow.

Kazuichi Soda hasn't been seen by anyone. But he has been heard.

It is nearly impossible to track this motherfucker down.

They looked everywhere - the airport, the military base, the plushie factory, everywhere that they could think of.

It wasn't until an employee mentioned that he was close friends with Hajime that they got an idea. They set up some equipment with sensors around the hotel and waited.

When they looked at the footage later, there seemed to be more than one student there. They even overheard bits of a conversation on the spirit box:

"How's...oking today?"

"Nice and quie...ople seem to be comin...more and...though."

"...isn't...urprise. They seem to...help."

"...hat a joke."

10/10, quiet and looking out for the others.

Nekomaru Nidai has been seen twice - once in Strawberry House, and once by Chandler Beach.

Large flashes of code were seen in the tower elevator by the spot where he died by two witnesses. They tried to set out equipment to recreate this phenomenon, but it never happened again.

He likes the flashlight game. He hates the spirit box.

Funny enough, it seems like he can't recall a lot of his time as Mechumaru. He remembers taking the blast for Akane, and his last battle with Gundham. That's it.

The other time by the beach was also an accident, but there wasn't one flash of code - there were two.

The witness swears that it was Nekomaru and Akane, but they didn't hear anything. It seems that they were both simply enjoying each other's company for a while before going back to being restless spirits.

8/10, a little helpful but otherwise stays out of the way.

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu can be found around the Beach House, but his most frequented spot is the diner.

Surprisingly enough, he's very interactive with the employees of the Hope Foundation. He uses the spirit box, he plays the flashlight game, etc.

He's even been seen in both code form and on an infrared sensor. He's had full conversations through the spirit box.

There was only one time he wasn't present, and when the employee assigned to him went looking, they felt drawn to the Beach House.

The power had been cut a long time ago, but they could still hear the faint sound of music while inside, along with some wind chimes. That sense of peace from before seemed amplified, growing into a feeling of joy.

When they turned on the spirit box, they could hear a whispering conversation between a male and a female with occasional laughter.

For one night a year, on the day Peko Pekoyama died, they're together again. 10/10.

Mahiru Koizumi is...everywhere?

She didn't get to see the rest of the islands like her classmates.

You know she's there when you hear a camera click and you're not actively taking photos. Sometimes she turns on the spirit equipment, effectively draining the batteries before they even start setting up.

She doesn't talk on the spirit box, but she'll do anything that's quiet. Dowsing rods, the flashlight game, etc.

She's picky about talking to guys, but gals and nonbinary pals? She's game.

When an employee mentioned Hiyoko Saionji, it got really quiet.

"Turn on the flashlight if you miss her."

Click.

9/10, minus one for ow factor.

Nagito Komaeda haunts the Ancient Ruins alongside Kamukura.

There's one rule; don't turn off the lights. Nobody has had the guts to try to break it.

Every room in that "school" has had something happen in it. Chairs have been thrown against the walls, tables knocked over, to try and break the coding he's trapped in.

Glass vases have been shattered, anything that's been on a table had been knocked over before, etc. There have been instances of an employee hearing the breaking of a glass vase that they put somewhere, going to check on it, and finding it completely intact, still on the table they left it on.

The employees that try to stay there for a full twenty-four hours never complete it. The longest completed run was sixteen hours.

The plan was simple; get there at ten AM, collect as much evidence as possible while taking shifts on sleeping, and leave at the same time the next day. The daytime was pretty mellow, with the occasional bang and crash recorded and not much else.

Once nighttime hit, it was a whole other ball game.

The two decided to stay in one of the classrooms with a lamp on, the overhead lights off, and the door closed. Screeches and cackling echoed off the walls, followed by intense sobbing. The employee that was asleep woke up from the feeling of choking, which was then confirmed by the bruises left behind around his throat. They wanted to stay, but, when the bulb in their lamp exploded, they decided against it.

1/10, fuck you and your temper tantrum.

Mikan Tsumiki floats around the third island, but she's seen the most at the Hospital.

An unnerving energy has since filled the building, with many if not all of the employees refusing to go inside.

If you're lucky, you'll see her from the corner of your eye. That's the most she's ever let herself be seen.

Sometimes the lights flicker without cause. The windows rattle and the glass cracks, as if someone tried to punch it.

Crying can be heard throughout the building at night. Sometimes there are screams. If you turn on the spirit box though, it gets interesting.

If you listen very closely, you can hear her whispers and rambling. She talks to herself.

She'll mutter medical knowledge, dates and times, names that were important to her - a little bit of everything.

She won't answer any direct questions, only Yes and No. She likes the Ouija board. One time an employee asked about Hiyoko and the planchet flew across the room.

5/10, do not interact if you are Hiyoko. Just don't.

Chiaki Nanami is nowhere and everywhere all at once.

Bits of her code fly around all of the islands, as if searching for something.

As an AI that was created to protect the students, she is the program. A memory that all of them had, and one that all of them wanted to see again.

If there's a direct Hope Foundation representative present, she will not interact. However, she seems to enjoy the company of the regular employees; maybe she relates to them more.

She likes big, open spaces; don't try to talk to her in a tight space, like a closet, because you'll get nothing.

Her favorite is the Ovilus box, since she can directly speak through it without too much effort.

Her physical form has only been seen once.

On one of the early mornings where an employee was out completing the night shift, the run began to rise where the waves crashed against each other before settling to the sandy shores of the beach. When they looked over to admire the view of the albeit-fake sunrise, two figures shielded by shadow caught their eye.

They claimed it looked as if a girl was there, waiting, when a boy came and scooped her up into a big hug. It was later confirmed that the descriptions matched Chiaki Nanami and Hajime Hinata.

10/10, she's finally home.

I hope you all enjoyed this, it was so hard to make! Thank you for your patience :)

[cerealmonster15]

bros don’t put that “hamsters are connected to having fate of gruesome death” post on my dash I don’t wanna SEE IT ❌❌❌

[greycaelum]

Kouki and Saika are always sweet and taking care of each other, are there any moments of them fighting or arguing abt something?

They take of each other, quite protective too but of course, they most definitely have their moments of arguments both small and big

Jujutsu Kaisen: Gojo Satoru X Reader

(Kaleidoscope Series: Clouds and Mochi Chapters)

[A bit of teasing and mistakes made between siblings.]

[Notes & Warning: Angst if you squint, comfort, sibling squabbles Word Count: 2.1k]

'm Sorry

 五条 空希 (こうき) 

—Gojo Kouki

It takes a lot to make Kouki snap. His patience can stretch sooooo long it'd put a baguette in shame. Just kidding, he's more patient than most kids but of course, he also gets annoyed and irritated.

There was a time Kouki ignored his sister, for a whole day...

Saika came running to you, tears running down and hiccuping.

"What's the matter, sweetie?"

"I l-lost K-ken-chi." She cried.

You froze at the sound of Kouki's hamster that Satoru got for the mochi and named after Nanami.

"Have you looked all over the house?" You set down your bag and ushered her in.

"I d-did," she coughed and cried.

"How can you look if you keep crying? Where's Kouki onii-chan?"

Saika pointed to their playroom downstairs.

Uh-oh... You sighed and knocked on the door.

"Sweetheart? Can Mama come in?"

"No." A crisp rejection answered you.

"Okay, if you're feeling better, come out so we can look for Ken-chi together."

But Kouki didn't answer anymore. Saika whimpered beside you.

"The doors are closed Ken-chi must still be inside the house." You reassured your daughter but she shake her head.

"P-Papa left the backdoor opened."

Then get ready to be blacklisted by your brother...

Internally you felt helpless. The hamster was unlike the usual ones in the pet shop. It has shiny blonde fur and an expensive hybrid too. Megumi had a hard time finding one and now it went nada...

"Go and talk to Kouki onii-chan when he comes out."

It's up to those two...

Kouki loves the hamster. He brings it when he visits Nanami. So how was he supposed to react when he comes home and his sister is holding the empty hamster pen?

He couldn't even react at all and went straight to the playroom and lock the door. It's not like he can shout to his sister, no he can't and he won't. It's just that he's extremely frustrated.

"Kikufuku? It's Papa," someone knocked on the door and Kouki wiped his tears. "Can I come in? I got you dinner."

Silently he stood up and unlock the door. Satoru peeked in and walk inside, holding a tray of two plates.

"Eat first or should I spoonfed you like when you were a baby?" Satoru teased but Kouki didn't even cringe. "Just eat." Satoru sighed.

"Ken-chi's gone." Kouki bit his inner lip.

"Mn, I guess he is." Satoru pushed the plate forward.

Kouki didn't answer more and ate in cold silence.

"Did you know that hamsters can live up to 1 to 3 years?" Satoru started. "Ken-chi had been with you for 3 years now. I'm not saying you don't take care of him good enough. You took such great care of your pet that I'm proud that I got one for you." Satoru ruffled Kouki's hair but it didn't lift the mochi's mood any bit.

"Then should I give up Ken-chi? No."

"Three days, look for your pet. If you find it then good, if you don't then move on." You need to understand that you can still live even without your pet... "He's been in a cage almost all his life, now he's living his remaining days by himself and free. Not all the time being lost means a bad thing."

"I'm still upset!"

Satoru smirk. Kouki who often keeps himself calm and compose, it's a little demanding to crack intense emotions from his son. So seeing him voice it out somehow settles Satoru's heart that Kouki can voice himself out without fear.

"Why?"

"Become Sai... Because she shouldn't have opened it! Then Ken-chi would still be here, and then..." Kouki's tears starts flowing again until he couldn't hold back anymore.

"C'mere," Satoru pull his son in front of him and rub the small back. "Cry as much as you can hmmm." It's okay to cry when you're upset...

And cry he did, pouring out his tears in front of his father until he grew tired and sniffled in the space of Satoru's neck, hugging his father's neck.

"Saika and Mama printed some posters we can stick around the neighborhood." You kneeled to face eye level with your son and showed him the bond papers. Saika's slightly clumsy handwriting under Ken-chi's picture. Each one of them was made with his sister's penmanship and care that it could be readable despite the still messy writing of a kid.

"Just that, don't print anymore Ma," Kouki thanked you.

"Should we get you tucked in?" You brush his puffy eyes and opened your arms.

"No, I'm feeling better." He shake his head but immediately dived into your arms, longing for a tight hug.

"Hmmm, love you, sweetheart." You crooned kissing his head and hugging him tight above your lap.

"Love you more." He mumbled.

"Love you most!" Satoru added from the kitchen.

After some more coaxing and smooching Kouki was finally able to climb upstairs into his bedroom but a surprise was already ahead of him.

Saika clutching his pillow tightly, with dried streams of tears on her cheeks shined upon by the lamp.

How can he get angrier? Well if only she didn't rob his pillow too... Kouki sighed and tiptoed to his bathroom. Soaking a towel and squeezing it off, walking back he gently dab the towel over his sister's eyes and cheeks. He doesn't want her to wake up with painful and dried tears in her eyes.

"Good night." He murmured, turning the light off and going under his covers.

"Nii-chan... 'm sorry"

Kouki froze and turn to his sister only to find her still sleeping. Shaking his head, Kouki pulled the blanket higher to his sister's shoulders and pat her head fondly.

"Sleep, troublesome cat..."

五条  幸月 (さいか)

—Gojo Saika

Saika is pretty much a cheerful girl, but her temper and actions are unpredictable, courtesy of the genes of her father. Saika rarely gets into an argument, but when she does it's a little hard to get her to back off.

Her temper flares up when she gets tricked, which is quite often with Satoru around. But sometimes her brother gets on her nerves a little too much.

"Kiku-nii I told you it was right here." The little miss reasoned out.

"Maybe it flew away," Kouki shrugged.

"Unicorns don't fly!" Saika fumed.

"Yes, they do. Didn't you watch the movie?"

"I want my Tottie back, now!" She demanded, glaring at her brother.

Her unicorn plushie was just right beside her onii-chan when she went to get ice cream, it can't possibly just disappear into thin air.

"I don't have Tottie." Kouki showed his empty pockets.

"Kiku-nii no baka!"

...

Kouki stared at her a little taken aback but quickly recovered. A smirk curled on her older brother's lips so like their father's.

"Really? Only idiots call others idiots." Kouki stuck his tongue out infuriating Saika more than ever.

"Nii-chan baka, baka!" Saika threw punches at her older brother but Kouki just laugh at her, running around the sofa in circles.

"You can't even touch me, how can you get Tottie back?" Kouki laughed.

Oh really? Not the one with long patience Saika turned to the staircase and ran up leaving her confused brother.

Papa said playing smarter is better than playing harder. Saika's curved. Rushing to her brother's room and locked the door.

What does Kiku-nii loves? She thought while walking around the room until he spotted her brother's newly bought PS4.

"Cat? What are you doing?"

"I got your PS4, give me my Tottie back."

"Hey! Papa just bought that last week!"

"Then give me my Tottie!"

"Got it, okay? It's in the laundry. Put my PS4 down."

Saika laugh in victory and unlocked the door while clutching the controller in hand. Eyeing her brother.

"Tottie?"

Kouki helplessly held his hand up in surrender and they walk down the stairs to the laundry room. The washing machine which just stopped is opened to get the stuffed toy back.

"That's not a unicorn." Saika grimace. Kouki held up her stuffed toy which has turned into a mess of rainbow colors. "That's a tragedy..." She added. "Kouki onii-chan!"

"Wait! Let me explain, Cat!" Kouki yelped, fumbling his words to explain what happened to the barely recognizable unicorn.

Too late the PS4 already went flying and shattered on the floor. Saika stomped and raised the stuffed toy that she has been with since day 1 of being born and now has been turned into a scrambled mess.

"Cat I... Cat?"

Saika just stood there motionless, feeling the seven stages of grief flood her while staring into the once was her unicorn best friend.

How is she supposed to even call it a unicorn? Tottie was reduced to an irreparable mess.

Unable to accept the reality that Tottie is not the same anymore, silently, Saika walk out of the laundry and marches to their playroom, locking the door. No

Kouki on the other hand immediately dialed Satoru.

"Pa, there's a disaster here."

When you and Satoru got home Kouki was holding the discolored stuffed toy, looking helpless and on edge.

"It can still be covered with another layer." You sighed beside you Satoru burst out laughing at the outrageous look of the unicorn. "Satoru it's not funny."

"What were you thinking Kikufuku?" Satoru wheezed, picking the thing from Kouki's hold while holding his mouth.

"I was gonna wash it."

"Where's Saika?" You held your head.

"Playroom."

"Hey I just got you this PS4 last week, why is it nada now?" Satoru crouched by the floor and lift the pieces of the destroyed controller.

"Collateral damage..." Kouki mumbled but shake the plushie in front of you. "What are we gonna do about Tottie, Ma?" He pleaded.

"I think we have to call your Auntie about that." You shooed your boys as you walk to the playroom. You have a customer that frequents your shop, she's skilled in crafts and such, maybe she can help you out with this.

"Sweetie? Can I come in?"

The door opened but no one answered. On the carpet, Saika is sitting with her chin on her knees.

"Do you need a hug my Little Treasure?" You sit in front of her and opened your arms.

Saika's lower lip quivered and immediately hug you. Gently you rock her in your hold while murmuring sweet nothings and head pats. Wiping her stray tears with your thumb.

"Tottie's gone."

"It's not sweetie."

"I want my Tottie back Ma." She rubs her eyes until red that you have to hold them down or else she'll irritate her eyes until red.

"We're gonna have it fixed but for now, no Tottie. You need to have patience."

Saika sniffled but reluctantly she nodded. You can't blame how much she loves the plushie. It was given by Kouki the first time your munchkins met and until now, Saika can't let the unicorn go, or else she can't sleep well.

"Patience sweetie..."

Saika stayed in your arms until she fell asleep. Clutching your shirt tight in her hand while burying her face in the crook of your neck. A gentle knock filtered on the door and Kouki peeked in.

"She just fell asleep," you held your finger over your lips

"Papa and I are gonna go out for a moment, we'll be back before dinner Ma."

...

Saika woke up, feeling emptiness in her arms. Gone was her beautiful white and lilac unicorn.

"G'morning Cat! Rise and shine Princess!" Satoru entered the room with a wide grin on his face. "I made you macaroni soup downstairs."

She's not really hungry...

Satoru saw this and cleared his throat. "And someone got something for you."

Opening the door, a big white and gold bear entered the bedroom, it was so big it could barely fit the door.

"'m sorry Cat." Kouki peeked from behind the bear, he was the one pushing it inside.

Saika sat on her bed, dazed and uncertain of the humongous bundle of fluff that just entered her room. Saika turned to her father and to the bear.

"Is that for me?"

"Yup, Kouki onii-chan bought it for you." Satoru smiled and gestured for his daughter to approach the thing Kouki is holding.

"It's so fluffy, I'm gonna drown!" Saika in awe jumped straight to the bear and smothered herself in the soft bliss.

"Auntie said she can fix Tottie but it will take time," Kouki explained. Kouki watches Saika getting to know her new bear and carefully asked. "You like it?"

"Like!" Saika nod. "Thank you Kiku-nii," Saika almost stumbled forward but Kouki caught her in time and Saika hug her brother tight.

Satoru smirked at his munchkins, with bright smiles on their faces. Good thing she likes it. Kouki made a deal with him, the mochi will clean the dishes for the whole month in exchange for buying that big bear for his sister...

"After that make sure to come down, breakfast is ready." Satoru left the two to play around some more and descended the stairs to find you preparing the table for breakfast,

—GreyCaelum,

PLAGIARISM IS A CRIME

Check out the Masterlist for more

All rights and credits of the Jujutsu Kaisen character(s) mentioned images(s) and songs(s) used belongs to their respective owner(s)

General/Kaleidoscope Series Taglist: @ice-icebaby @aeanya @gummy-dummy

[hchollym]

i would love to hear more about stay at home dad percy if you have anymore reasons/headcanons. it just fits him so well!

I think it fits him well too! 🥰

My reasons are mostly explained in this post, but I have tons of headcanons about this!

Stay-at-Home Dad Percy Headcanons

Percy is actually way more laid back as a parent than he was as an older brother (partially because of experience, partially because of age, and partially because his role is clearly defined without other people affecting the dynamic he has with his kids - see this post).

He created a mini library in his house for the kids when they were little. It had decorated bookshelves, fun children's books, stuffed animals (reading buddies), and bean bags, because he was really hoping that his kids would enjoy reading (which they do). I also have a small headcanon that he might have written a few children’s books for them (see this post).

When his kids were teenagers, they weren't afraid to come to him and tell him they messed up (in fact, he was the first person they went to), because he's always been open with them about how he's made a lot of mistakes, so it's okay if they do, and he'll always love them. He made it very clear that no matter how bad it is, they'll always be able to come home. 😭❤️

He used to put cheap, white sheets on the floor for the kids to color and paint on (instead of paper), because it was easy to clean, reusable, and the kids thought it was awesome.

He was constantly afraid that his children would not feel loved enough or even that they would wish they had one of his brothers as their dad instead (because they were more "fun" in Percy’s mind), so his partner had to reassure him about it more than once.

He cried when they left for their first year at Hogwarts (but he managed to hold it in until he got home, because he didn’t want to embarrass them at the train station).

He was usually good at saying no to the kids when it was necessary, but he had two exceptions that he could never deny them: 1. Any small pets they wanted (kitten, hamsters, toads, etc.), so he ended up with a lot of animals (that he grumbled about but secretly loved - see this post), and 2. Anything prank or joke related, because it reminded him of Fred. 

Percy loves cooking (see this post), and the girls loved helping him cook (even though he had minor panic attacks at the beginning because the kitchen was so messy, but he pretended it was fine, because he wanted his children to know that they meant more to him than a clean house).

He taught his children French when they were growing up, because he was fluent in it (see this post), and he wanted them to be able to converse with their cousins in another language. As a result, his girls are very close to Bill and Fleur's kids.

He was thrilled to have girls instead of boys, because he's always related better to women (I mean, this is literally canon - the people we see him get along with most are Penelope, Hermione, and Ginny).

He sings to his kids when no one else is around (since we know he sings in the shower - see this post).

He went to every single Quidditch game the girls played in while they were at Hogwarts (I headcanon them as Quidditch players), cheering embarrassingly loud.

I love talking about this! ❤️ Thanks for the ask! 😊

[2manyfandoms2count]

Sleepless in Paris

I ended up not posting anything Ladrien in June when I'd planned to do something, but then I saw the last prompt of @ladrienjune (Speechless), and since it tied in with an idea I had a couple of weeks ago... Here you go!

Established Ladrien, Adrien receives a text from his girlfriend and overthinks its meaning. Thankfully Ladybug comes and clears things up.

Loosely based on a quote from Le Discours, a novel by Fabrice Caro.

Read on AO3

---

Adrien, we need to talk.

Adrien read the message over and over again, like an overworked student stuck on a paragraph whose meaning just won’t register.

He tossed his phone aside and lied back down, rubbing his eyes as he did so.

Oh, how much he regretted ever getting Ladybug a private phone so they could communicate. It had seemed like a good idea after their third close call, when she had almost swung into his room like she owned the place (and maybe she did, she was his girlfriend, after all, anything was possible), in the middle of an impromptu piano recital his father had requested. Thankfully, the false notes he’d made upon seeing her almost crash into the window had covered any sound she’d made as she changed course, and made sure his father and Nathalie’s attention was on him, and not on the red blur just outside.

She’d laughed so prettily when she’d unwrapped the box and noticed that he’d painted little black dots on the back of the red phone case. She’d insisted on paying him back in kisses and sweet nothings. Even if he’d wanted to, he wouldn’t have been able to refuse; his girlfriend was convincing like that.

Yes. Those had been the good old days.

The ones when the messages he received from her didn’t come as a blow that made his stomach tie into knots and question if he was going to be okay (although that might not have been entirely true; the feeling he’d gotten when he’d read “I love you” on his screen, written down, not just whispered between two makeout sessions or before she left, a permanent trace of her feelings, could definitely have fit that description, but the difference was that he’d questioned if he was in heaven, then).

The timestamp of the message read Monday, 4:36pm. He’d managed to type a “when?” at 5:58pm, which she’d seen at 5:59pm. Nothing since. That was new, too. Even messages that didn’t require an answer always got at least a couple of emojis in reply.

It was now Tuesday, 6:12am, and he hadn’t slept a wink, dissecting the five words, twenty characters, like they were a long lost spell that could fix hunger on Earth.

The first thing he’d noticed was the full stop. That didn’t bode well - even he knew that nobody ended a text like that these days.

Then, the comma. A pause. Not great either, in the context of a relationship.

Especially when it came before a “we need to talk”. He didn’t need to have seen many romantic comedies to know that this was probably an end of the line warning.

Even his name was a sign.

Adrien.

Not “my prince”. Not “my love”. Not even “my Adrien”, like she’d taken to calling him recently. Just plain old boring Adrien . Until the message had arrived, he hadn’t realised they’d been on a downward slope, but maybe he’d been too busy burying his head in the sand to notice. Maybe deep down, he’d known that it wasn’t viable.

That Ladybug, basically a goddess among men, had no business being in a relationship with a commoner like him, however much she tried to fool herself by calling him her prince. Adrien. The more he read it, the more emphasis he put on the second syllable. Ad- rien . Ad rien. Towards nothing. Maybe she’d known they were doomed from the start, that they had no future, but she’d tried anyway.

Maybe he was reading too much into it and the lack of sleep was making him delirious.

Whatever the outcome, he supposed they’d had a good run. He’d cherish all of the moments they’d spent together.

Actually, he thought, sitting up again, maybe that was what she needed. Maybe he could change her mind if he reminded her of all their good memories. There was no way she couldn’t be convinced, or at least persuaded, by his plea. He hadn’t gone six months playing a double game of putting on a fake insensitivity mask over the one he wore with Chat Noir's to avoid her seeing through him, when she deserved to be showered in compliments at every moment of the day, for it to end this way.

He loved her.

He picked up his phone again and pressed the dial button.

One tone. Two tones. Three.

Adrien suddenly remembered the time, hastily hung up, and facepalmed audibly, making Plagg roll over in his sleep and hiss.

“Sorry,” he whispered, before turning his attention back to the phone.

If his call hadn’t woken her up, then his mistake would be the first thing she’d see when she did.

This was bad. It wasn’t like he could go delete the evidence. He didn’t know where she lived, and since he doubted that she slept while transformed, there was no way to track her. Which would also be bad, he reminded himself, but maybe this emergency would justify it.

Anyway,  he couldn't cry over spilt milk, but maybe he could escape. Just move somewhere, preferably on the other side of the world. He could change his life, his name (actually, could that alone change the outcome of their relationship? If he changed it before planning anything, could they pick up as if nothing happened, and would the timeline be fixed? He wished he’d thought about it before calling her), and raise hamsters in the mountains. What he didn’t know couldn’t hurt him, right? And then he could live happily ever after in the sweet, sweet illusion that despite them being miles apart, he still lived in a world in which he was Ladybug’s boyfriend.

He didn’t know if he preferred the idea of her never coming after him, or her seeking him out, even if it was to deliver bad news, but it didn’t really matter. The plan sounded good. Foolproof.

He hopped off of his bed and pulled a suitcase out of his closet. He’d always wondered why his father stored them there when it really seemed like an unnecessary temptation, but at least it was useful now.

If he was to start over somewhere, he needed to leave Adrien behind. The guy was a train wreck anyway, but unfortunately for him, a train wreck people would want to find, when he just wanted to be left alone to mope.

No more white shirts, then. They were too recognisable. He found a collection of dark hoodies at the back of the closet and stuffed them in the bag, along with t-shirts (they’d be hidden under his hoodie so he could keep those), a pair of jeans and some shorts.

He came back into his room and put his suitcase on his bed, scanning his surroundings for other essentials. His eyes landed on the fencing cup he kept his Ladybug pictures in. He’d definitely need those. It would help maintain him in his illusion. He also needed his Ladybug pyjamas, which he kept hidden since he wasn’t sure his father would approve of them. They’d be perfect for his new life.

Plagg stirred on his pillow. Before Adrien could ask himself whether it was reasonable for the small god to come with him, there was a knock on the window, and he froze. He turned around slowly; Ladybug stood in the window frame, looking glorious in the soft dawn light. He noticed she was holding a small paper bag in her left hand. He was sure it could fit everything he’d ever gotten her.

“Going somewhere?” She frowned, hopping inside before he could even move.

Adrien stared at her, before guessing he’d better bite the bullet. “Well I just figured I’d rather not stick around if you’re going to break up with me.” He crossed his arms over his chest.

He watched her face fall and started to doubt his conclusion.

“Break up with…” she muttered slowly, as if tasting the words, before shaking her head. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Adrien, we need to talk.” He airquoted. “I get it, it’s fine. I’m-”

“Adrien, I’m not here to break up with you. At all.” She shook her head again and took a step forward. “What would make you think that?”

“Adrien, first of all,” he stated.

“Your name?...” She tilted her head inquisitively.

“You used to call me my Adrien. Or sweeter stuff.” He pointed out.

“Oh Kwami.” She shook her head, trying to repress a smile, although the blond didn’t notice.

“And then don’t think I didn’t notice you being less present lately.” He waved a finger at her, feeling himself blush. He knew his accusation was a tad hypocritical; sure, their date hangouts in the previous few weeks had been less frequent than they’d been at the beginning of their relationship, when she’d drop in practically every day, but they’d also been full of Akumas and photoshoots, what with his father’s new collection dropping. She’d managed to beat him to his room most days, hanging out around the windows as she waited, which had made it very difficult for him to sneak back in.

But on the occasions they had seen each other, she’d also seemed more lost in her thoughts than usual. Nervously wringing her hands together while they chilled in front of a movie, despite him soothingly raking his fingers through her hair. Being even more elusive about what was going on in her life, if that was possible. Looking at him with determination in her eyes, opening her mouth to speak, only to close it and shake her head with a sigh.

“I’m really sorry about that, my love .” She gave him a pointed look as she took his hand. “I’ve just been thinking a lot lately, about you, me, our relationship. How, you’re right, it might seem like we’re spending less time together to you , but…” she trailed off, biting her lip.

“How could that statement have a but ?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Well, um, I had this sort of crazy idea, because we’ve only been dating for six months and it’s totally not like I ever imagined us getting married and having three kids and a hamster or anything…” she mumbled nervously, and Adrien felt his heart flutter in his chest. “Anyway, I’ve been trying to get a hold of Chat Noir all night to check that he approves the idea, and also because I feel like it’s kind of an unspoken agreement that unless it’s an emergency and it really feels right, we’d do this together first, but he’s not replying and I was awake and you were awake and I thought…”

“Okay my… Lovebug, breathe.” Adrien’s caring boyfriend instinct kicked in as her rambling gave him confirmation that their relationship wasn’t in immediate danger, and he placed his hands on her shoulders, taking a deep breath to show the example. She mirrored him, and they breathed in sync for a couple of cycles, until he was satisfied that she’d stopped hyperventilating. He lead her to his couch and helped her sit down.

“Croissant?” she asked shyly, presenting him with the bag she’d brought. A pastry bag. Not a bag with his belongings. He really needed to stop jumping to conclusions.

“You know me so well.” He smiled brightly as he took one of the baked goods. They were still warm. The croissant didn’t last long in his hands. “Anyway,” he gulped down the last bite, “if you don’t mind me asking, what was your miraculous idea?” He smiled at himself, proud of his pun.

“Well, I was thinking that I could reveal my identity to you,” Ladybug replied, daintily wiping the corners of her mouth with a tissue.

It was a good thing Adrien was already sitting down, else more than his jaw would have ended up on the floor.

“Your… Your identity. Reveal. To me.” He asked seriously, hoping his words would make sense to her. It was better than remaining speechless.

“Yes, I am considering it,” she laughed. The sound made his brain tangle even more.

“Why?” He croaked.

“Well, as I said, it would enable us to spend more time together.” He raised his eyebrows, but she didn’t elaborate. “And I don’t know, I feel like it would be right. You’ve got something, Adrien.” She smiled tenderly.

“I… I do?” He felt himself blush.

“It’s just a croissant crumb, there, let me get it for you.” She leaned forwards and kissed the corner of his mouth. The contact jump started his brain.

“Ladybug, this is serious.” He backed away slightly. “Why me?”

“Fine.” She sighed. “Well, you're my boyfriend, but I know you a lot better than you might think. Before you say anything, no, I can’t tell you why yet, I need to speak to Chat Noir first. But there is something about you, Adrien. I feel like I can trust you. With this. Because of course I trust you otherwise.”

Adrien looked down at his hands and twiddled his thumbs, pouting as he thought.

“Adr- Sunshine? Is everything alright?” Ladybug placed a concerned hand on his thigh when his silence stretched to a slightly uncomfortable length.

“When you talk to Chat Noir, and he agrees to your plan…” He looked up and met her gaze.

“If,” she corrected him, but he waved her interruption away.

“...Will you guys reveal your identities to each other? Will you ask Chat Noir who he is under the mask?” He felt almost feverish as he searched her eyes for a hint of the answer before she could speak.

“Um, yes, I guess that’s how I saw the discussion going.” Ladybug frowned. “Are you concerned that it will change our relationship somehow? Because I promise it won’t, I-”

“Oh Bluebell, it definitely will, but not in the way that you think.” Adrien pecked her lips, a mischievous smile spreading on his as he pulled away.

“Oh?” Ladybug blinked a couple of times. Adrien tried to hide his smugness at her speechlessness.

“Yep. You see, I’m one hundred percent paw-sitive your dearest partner will agree to your plan.” He grinned, watching the realisation dawn on her face.

“How hard was refraining from making cat puns in the past six months?” Ladybug finally sighed, a small smile tugging at her lips.

“Very, my Lady.” He pouted. "But not as hard as refraining from kissing you on patrol."

“Maybe you can help him pay up all the Camembert he owes me for sitting through him ranting about all the missed opportunities,” Plagg called out, making her jump slightly. Adrien rolled his eyes.

“Anyway, you were right, your plan really will allow us to spend more time together!” His face lit up like a kid's on Christmas morning.

“You don’t know the half of it.” Ladybug shook her head, before looking back up at him, an indecipherable look on her face. “Need a lift for school?”

“That’s all you’ve got to say?” Adrien looked at his girlfriend with kitten eyes, disappointed that she hadn’t held up her side of the bargain.

“Well, it’s time to go if you don’t want to be caught by your bodyguard.” She shrugged, stood up, and extended a hand toward him, the twinkle in her eye the only tell in her poker face.

“Ladybug…” He whined, pouting.

“What, Chaton?” Her smile finally broke free. “It’s very literally on my way. I can drop you off at your seat, and then walk to mine… Right behind you.” She booped him on the nose.

Once again, Adrien was thankful he was already sitting down.

As she carried him to school, Adrien decided sleep was overrated. Sometimes reality was the best dream of all.

[staticscreenwriting]

Skin deep - Chapter One || B.H.

Synopsis: Billy survived the battle of Starcourt but is left with a body full of scars. Scars that remind him of the pain he had to go trough and the horrible person he has become. In order to forget about all of that and move on, he wants to get them covered up. Good thing Hawkins has a brand new Tattoo studio and the girl who works there might just be the help Billy has been looking for.

A/N: I needed a TattooArtist!Reader x Billy story so I wrote one and you know me, I can’t keep it short and simple. There will be several parts to this. Don’t ask me about an updating schedule because I don’t have one. I try my best to be consistent but I make no promises. Likes, reblogs, comments are all much appreciated. 

[additional note: I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please.]

Billy’s palms are clammy as he steps out of his car. His eyes wander towards the sign hanging above the door, welcoming him to “Little Bear Tattoos” as an American traditional bear face grins back at him.

This isn’t his first time getting a tattoo, by all means, he shouldn’t be as nervous as he is. But things are different now. Everything is different. Things change after you almost die because you sacrificed yourself to an otherworldly creature to save a little girl.

He had just turned 18 when he got that stupid little skull inked onto his arm. That’s now just a little over a year ago but it seems like a lifetime has passed since then. Sometimes, Billy thinks, sometimes It feels like that was another person altogether. That dumb little boy who thought he knew shit. The one that paraded his tattoo around like a complete and utter douchebag. He thought it made him look rough and cool and dangerous.

In retrospect, it just made it more obvious that he didn’t know shit about anything. Not life. Not death. And most definitely not about what it means to look rough and cool and dangerous. Sometimes he wishes he could go back to that moment and just relish in ignorant bliss. Most of the time he tries not to think of the past though because thinking of the past means thinking of all the things lost that night in July. Most of all himself.

Back then, getting a tattoo was easy. Now, it feels like the entire world is resting on his shoulders. It feels like he can barely keep it all from crashing down on him. 

The bell above the door chimes as he steps inside the tattoo parlor. It’s a relatively small shop but it looks clean and the walls are covered in framed drawings of very intricate designs. If those have been drawn by this place’s artist, he’s in good hands.

A fluffy little brown dog is lazily resting on a pillow by the shop window and only raises his head as the sound of footsteps approaching fills the room.

“ Hi, welcome to little bear. “ a cheery voice calls out to him as a girl steps out from behind a curtain leading to some backroom. She has a big radiant smile on her face though it exudes a certain warmth that only genuine smiles do. 

“ Hi uh — I was wondering if you have a free spot. “ 

“ Hmm… that depends. What are you wanting to get? “ 

To be quite honest, he hadn’t really thought much about it. All he wanted was something to cover up the ugly scars still streaking most of his body. When before, he felt a certain kind of pride whenever he passed a mirror, now it sends a sharp pain straight to his heart. Everything about him, from the perpetually tired look in his eyes to the scars, it’s al a reminder of the bad things he’s done. And the worst part is that he can never talk to anyone about it. Ever. No one will understand but the people who’ve been there, and though he and Max are getting along much better now, he still doesn’t fancy having long profound conversations with her about his demons.

“ I uh — I’m not sure but it needs to cover something.” 

“ Old tattoo? “ 

Billy swallows audibly “scars.” 

He’s not sure what reaction he’s expected from her but a casual “Okay, we can figure something out. “ is not it. Though he avoids wearing short sleeves these days, whenever someone manages to catch a glimpse of his damaged skin he got 1 of two reactions. Either people started regarding him with pity or disgust and he honestly wasn’t sure which was worse. At least those disgusted by him left him well enough alone and didn’t hold a million questions they expected him to answer in great detail.

“ Let’s sit down and we can talk about some things you like and see how we can incorporate those into a tattoo. Also, I would have to take a look at the area you want me to tattoo and see how bad the scarring is just so I can take that into consideration when designing the piece. Scar tissue is harder to tattoo but don’t worry, I promise I can do it. “

“ You’re gonna be tattooing me? “

It seems like a dumb question but honestly, Billy hasn’t met or seen that many female tattoo artists in his life and this girl seems to be about his age. That’s not something you see every day.

“ Yup. I’m (Y/N), this is my shop. Now, do you want something to drink while we discuss the piece? I got all kinds of sodas, I got water and I got non-alcoholic beer. 

“ Dr. Pepper? “ 

“ Good choice. Coming right up. “ 

She walks behind the counter with the cash register and reaches into a small fridge taking out two cans of Dr. Pepper before leading him towards a little seating area by the window. 

The fluffy little dog lifts his head once again regarding the two of them with only mild interest before plopping back down. 

“ Oh, you okay with dogs? I can take him to another room if you’re uncomfortable. “

Billy shakes his head. Nah, he loves dogs. Always wanted one but Neil, being the miserable bastard he is, never allowed the kids to have any pets. Too much work, too much responsibility. What an asshole. 

Though Billy is never going to admit it, the bedside drawer, that was once filled with issues of Penthouse magazine, now holds a bunch of self-help books and magazines dealing with topics of PTSD and trauma. A lot of them mention getting a support animal whether that be a specially trained dog or just a hamster to keep you company. It makes sense, it gives you someone who listens to you vent about all your problems and insecurities. If only his dad cared enough about his mental state to reconsider his stance on pets. Then again, when has Neil ever cared about him?

“Nah, it’s fine don’t worry. He’s cute.”

“Thanks. His name is Bear and he’s kind of the mascot of this store.”

There’s a twinkle of pride in her eyes while she talks about the shop and her dog. Something Billy is infinitely envious of. Everything he’s ever felt any hint of pride in is gone. His car. His looks. All of it.

“Okay so tell me a little about yourself. Is there anything you can think of that you’d like to get inked? Any interests, hobbies? Maybe you wanna tell me a little about yourself.”

Back before, when things were different, Billy would’ve packed as much ego enlarging words and compliments into it as possible. Would’ve mentioned his car and his most satisfactory performance skills in the bedroom. But now, he hardly knows who he is these days. 

“ Um … my name is Billy. I’m 19, I’m from California. ‘Bout two years ago my dad packed us all up and had us move out here to the end of the world. Then … things happened.”

“You miss California?”

“Every day. The thought of going back one day is the only thing that keeps me fucking going. I miss the ocean. I miss surfing. I miss home. I miss all of it.”

She looks at him intensely for a moment, sizing him up, contemplating her next words. He can almost see the creative gears running in her head. 

“Alright. I might have an idea. I’d have to see the area first though.”

He expects pity in her voice though there is none. Her words are comforting and warm and calm. Billy wonders how often she has to deal with clients like him. Those who come to her with painful and ugly reminders of their past.

His hands are shaking as he pulls off his denim jacket and reveals his left arm to her. The skin is streaked with scars. They’re the same paths that used to wind up and down his arm in inky black hues like poisonous vines. Now they’re a faded pink but that doesn’t mean he hates them any less.

Billy can feel his heart beating in a fast rhythm as anxiety floods his system. Maybe this was a bad idea, maybe -

“Okay how big would you want to go,” (Y/N) asks, her voice gentle and soothing and her eyes switching from his arm to his eyes. She doesn’t ask him what happened and that’s a relief.

“As big as you can. I know you can’t make it disappear but I’d like as much of it covered as possible.”

“ I won’t be able to do an entire sleeve today but if that’s something you want we can start with a bigger piece on your upper arm today and then work our way to a full sleeve in the future?”

“Sounds good. I just want the scars gone. I need them covered.”

“Well my guy, you’ve come to the right place. It’s my specialty. You’re in luck too, I’m free all day so depending on your pain tolerance and the trauma of your skin, we might even be able to finish the first piece today.”

Pain tolerance, he wants to scoff at that. What he’s been through, the pain and the anguish and the emotional trauma, nothing will ever compare to that. Not even close. He’d get a 100 tattoos all at once and it still wouldn’t measure up.

“Alright, let’s do it.”

“Cool awesome! Imma go over to the drawing board and you can feel free to keep yourself entertained in the meantime. We have an arcade machine in the back. There’s records in the corner if you want to listen to some music. I’ll even let you choose.”

“Is that an honor?” Billy asks, a small smirk on his face. Every once in awhile a flicker of the person he used to be shines through. But then it’s gone and he’s left as this shadow of his former self.

“Oh you have no idea.”

As (Y/N) settles behind a big wooden table and starts scribbling away, Billy wanders over towards the corner of the studio. A bright red record player is resting on a sideboard surrounded by several boxes filled with vinyl records. They’re sorted by band name then chronologically. There’s all kinds of genres too. AC/DC and Judas Priest but also Stuff like The Mamas and the Papas and the Monkees.

“Anything, in particular, you wanna listen to? Kinda hard to make out your taste with this selection. There’s … everything.” Billy calls out to her, leaving through the records.

“What can I say? I like a bit of everything. Don’t like to limit myself.”

Old Billy would’ve raised his eyebrow and asked her if that extends to her love life as well. But old Billy is gone and so he keeps his mouth shut.

“I know it seems like just your kinda music, but maybe stay away from the hard rock. Maybe something a bit more mellow.”

He hasn’t really listened to a lot of music since … well since everything. He mostly sleeps or reads and sometimes when it’s a good day he even attempts to do a bit of writing. It’s nothing spectacular but it’s - something. An outlet really. The stories vary from an autobiographical retelling of the incident to silly tales of young boys going on space adventures. It's a way to get lost in the save parts of his mind. The ones that can create make-believe worlds and happy thoughts. Not the ones tainted with gruesome images of the past.

The opening notes the Monday Morning by Fleetwood Mac fill the air and Billy doesn’t miss the smile tugging on the corner of (Y/N)’s lips. 

“Nice. Didn’t really think you were a Fleetwood Mac fan.”

Billy shrugs his shoulders casually “they’re a classic.”

He sits back down in the seat by the window, watches as the clouds pass the sky and the people go about their day. That’s until a furry little ball of fluff settles down in his lap and demands to be cuddled.

“Oh hey, you.”

“Sorry about that. Bear does not understand the concept of personal boundaries. He thinks everyone is only here to pet him. If he bothers you just set him down.”

But he doesn’t mind one bit. In fact, combing his fingers through the curly brown fur fills Billy with a sense of calm and it grounds him a little. He really needs to adopt a dog for himself. 

“It’s fine. No bother.”

Time passes with Billy cuddling the dog and ever so often glancing over at (Y/N) while she’s working on the sketch. She’s drawing then erasing then redrawing. Copying then throwing it away then doing it all again. All the while she’s dancing along to the music. There’s a lightness about her that Billy wishes he could possess. Even before the Stacourt situation, he never had this unbothered lightness about him. That’s just not the person you turn into when you grow up in a house with Neil Hargrove.

A light drizzle falls outside and Stevie Nicks sings along to it and life feels … almost peaceful right then. Billy lives for these small moments of normality. These glimmers of what life used to be. 

“Okay, I’m ready. Wanna have a look?” 

There’s a bright smile on her face as she looks at him and waves the sketch around. “I think I nailed this one. I hope you’ll like it.“

Billy can see that she actually means it. It's not just a silly phrase she’s tagged onto her sentence. She’s genuinely nervous for him to see it.

Bear follows Billy as he walks toward the counter, a smiley (Y/N) watching their every move. There’s something about how passionate she is about her work that makes Billy both happy and sad. There used to be things in life that he was passionate about. His car. His clothes. The music he loved. Now it’s all dull and trivial and he’s lost. So damn lost.

His eyes wander towards the sheet of paper. Delicate black lines run across the page, swirling and arching and creating a beautiful composition. It’s a lighthouse. A tall and sturdy one. It shines it’s light out into the distance to guide the ships safely around the sharp edges of the cliffs. It’s a beacon of safety and hope surrounded by the rough sea and crashing waves.

“I thought it was a nice symbol, you know. Light in the dark. Guiding ships to safety.” (Y/N) explains. She’s biting her lip nervously and Billy thinks it’s insanely adorable. This piece is perfect, to think she’s uncertain and nervous about his reaction …

“I tried to incorporate the ocean and the crashing waves. You know, as a reminder of your life in California.”

Billy is speechless for a moment. Everything he wanted. All the ideas swirling around in his head. She put it down on paper, made them visible. And he didn’t even have to voice them. They were all just mushy gray clouds in his head, non forming a coherent picture. Just a feeling. A feeling of peace and belonging. Of being strong when everything around you tries to push you down to your knees.

“Do you like it? I can change it if you —“ 

“I love it!”

Her mood immediately changes after hearing those words. As if a switch is suddenly flipped and sunshine floods her face. Her eyes light up and her smile widens.

“Okay perfect! Wanna get started?” 

“Sure, let’s do it!”

The black leather chair is soft underneath him as (Y/N) puts the stencil onto his skin. She has a soft gentle touch which only matches the tone of her voice. Very calming. A complete opposite to the rest of Billy’s life.

“Okay, so it’s not gonna be pleasant since I have to tattoo over scar tissue. If you wanna tap out or take a break just let me know.”

He’s fairly sure that whatever pain he’ll have to endure, it will be nothing compared to what he’s already been through. Pain has a completely different meaning to him now. 

“I’ll be fine.”

And he means it. Not just about the tattoo, about everything. It feels like this is the first step into a new life. One that won’t be determined by his past mistakes. By the trauma.

The buzzing sound of the tattoo gun fills the air and (Y/N) starts pulling the first few lines. Short strokes. As if to test his pain tolerance. Her eyes wander up to meet his, a silent question shining through them.

He grants her a nod. One of pure determination. One that says, without question: “I’ll be fine!”

For a while, they sit in comfortable silence. There’s just the humming of the machine and the raspy voice of Stevie Nicks to lull them into a soft tranquility. 

“ I’m not gonna ask about the scars but can I ask about the skull on the other arm?”

Billy lets out a mix between a laugh and a scoff. “Sins of my youth really.”

“ Oh geez, that makes you sound so old. You’re what, 19?”

“ Almost 20.”

“ See. You’re still in the prime of your youth!”

Billy shrugs his shoulder as she dips the tattoo gun back into the ink. Truthfully, it doesn’t feel like he’s in the middle of his youth. He feels so damn tired. He never got to be a kid. Never got to be a teen. Always wandering in between it all, lost and disillusioned with no one there to guide or help him.

“ How old are you?”

“ Just turned 20 a few days ago.”

“And you already have your own shop. That’s impressive.”

“Yeah well, it’s all I ever wanted to be. Worked my ass off. Spent all my free time at my cousin's tattoo studio up in Carmel. He taught me everything I know. Worked after school and on the weekends and then when I graduated my cousin gave me a little loan and I had enough to open the shop. He believed in me when no one else did and it means everything to me. Hope I make him proud. I just always felt like this is what I'm meant to be. An artist. And this way my art gets immortalized on people’s skin and in some cases it can help them overcome difficult times in their lives. I hope I can make even the smallest change in people’s lives. “

It doesn’t get lost on him, that she doesn’t mention her parents. Something must be up there but it sure as hell isn’t his place to ask about it. Families, he knows quite well, can be a touchy subject.

“Well, you’re definitely making a change in mine.”

“Yeah?”

She looks almost bashful as the question tumble from her lips.

“Yup. I … I need to make those scars disappear. They — they remind me of the worst time in my life and of a version of myself I never want to be again. Having you cover them for me with this art piece that’s so fucking cool, it means everything.”

“That’s good to hear.”

“You should be proud of yourself.”

There’s a connection there, one he can neither grasp nor explain. It’s like she understands parts of him he doesn’t even put on display. And it’s both scary and exciting. And maybe, he understands parts of her she’s not aware she’s putting on display either.

“Okay. I’m done!”

There’s an infinite sense of pride exuding from her words. Billy wishes there was something in his life that he was good at. Something to let him be proud of himself.

“Wanna take a look?” (Y/N) asks with the most radiant smile playing on her face.

“Absolutely!”

His legs are stiff from sitting in the chair for so long but he can’t wait to see the finished piece. Slowly he walks towards the full-length mirror, (Y/N) hot on his heels.

His eyes fall onto the artwork now permanently inked into his skin. There are vibrant shades of blue and dark black lines. The sea is alive, it’s unforgiving and rough. But there’s the light from the lighthouse, the hope, the safety. It’s all there’s and it’s beautiful. Where there used to be ugly pink scars thick and burning, there’s now a beautiful painting. The scars are gone. The pain is gone. All that’s left is beauty and hope.

He doesn’t realize that tears are running down his cheek until she hands him a tissue. His first reaction is to wipe them away and pretend they weren’t there in the first place. A Hargrove man isn’t allowed to cry. Not in front of people anyway. Especially not in front of women. Hargrove men are bitter and numb. They’re stoic. Silent. Angry. Above all they’re sad.

But isn’t that the person he wants to leave behind?

So he lets himself feel it. Lets the tears fall as if it were nothing. 

Maybe this can be the next step into becoming the person he wishes so desperately he can be.

“I take it you like it?”

“I love it.”

And he hugs her. Pulls her close and tight as if he’s known her forever. She reciprocates the hug in no time. Softly oats him on the shoulder.

She smells like flowery perfume and clean cotton. Soft. Sweet. Intoxicating

“I can not thank you enough.”

“Billy, trust me this means as much to me as it does to you.”

He doesn’t disagree with her but he’s sure that’s not true. It means everything to him.

They talk for a little longer then he pays her, way too little if you ask him. She deserves way more and he suspects that some kind of personal sympathy plays into the price. But he’s not one to argue. Not when he’s sure he’ll come back. There are more scars. More pain. He’s not fixed but he’s at least a work in progress now.

She takes a few Polaroids of his tattoo, to put on her wall. To show people she can cover scars. Can help them. Help fix them. Make them feel less broken. 

“They’re burn scars.”

Billy finds himself sharing a piece of his story. One he’s kept so close to him, sometimes he almost wondered if it was true. But it is. And there are more reminders all over his body. It feels right to share it though. She helped him cover part of it, without judging. Without questions. She deserves to know.

“Huh?”

“My scars. They are burn scars.  Not — not from the outside but from the inside. Like fire going through my veins. I uh don’t know how to explain but that’s what they are. You can tell that to your clients. That you covered burn scars. That you’re that talented. “

For a moment she just stares at him, a deep sense of affection shining from her eyes. It’s comforting and nerve-wracking all at once. But he lets himself feel it. He promises himself to let himself feel the good things even if they seem scary.

“That’s … hey, would you like to grab some dinner with me? I could really go for a burger at the diner round here. It’s real good. “

And with the way she smiles, how the hell is he supposed to say no to that.

“Sounds good to me. Lead the way!”

The sun hangs low above the horizon almost dips behind the line to vanish and make room for the moon but not quite yet. They step out into the dawn, Bear pattering alongside them his leash grabbed tightly in (Y/N) hand. 

As hues of red and pink and orange surround them and dip the world into a golden haze, Billy feels like maybe this is the way. Maybe this is his path leading into a new future. With less pain. Fewer scars. More color and more smiles.

And maybe a beautiful and talented girl and a little dog by his side.

[nightshade-minho]

-Nightmare- (4)

Warnings: Minho being a little bit of an asshole lol.

There she was, standing right in front of you. You gulped, trying not to look intimidated...but it was hard, considering the way she was looking you up and down.

Rina’s gaze travelled to your hand in Minho’s. She cocked her head to the side, pursing her lips.

“So...you’re dating your best friend.”

Minho nodded, and you looked up at him. He looked pretty confident and at ease, considering how nervous he’d been when the two of you left the apartment this morning.

“How did this happen, exactly?”

“It just...did.”

She skeptically raised an eyebrow. “So, you just woke up one morning and she was your girlfriend?”

Minho chuckled. “I don’t see why you want the details so bad. We’re together now, that’s what matters.”

Rina tapped her finger with her chin before shrugging, hoisting her purse over her shoulder as she smiled before walking away.

You felt Minho’s tight grip on your hand relax as she left. He looked at you, grinning. “That went pretty smoothly, didn’t it?”

“Uh huh. So does that mean we can stop this now?”

Minho shook his head incredulously. “Fuck no? If we break up right after, she’ll obviously understand it was a farce. No, we have to keep this going for a while...at least until the party.”

“Honestly...am I the only one who felt like she wasn’t completely convinced?”

“Yeah...I noticed that too. We have to step up our game.”

•••

The evening air was quite breezy, and you felt very calm as you sat on the balcony, your guitar on your lap as you strummed mindlessly, staring at the moon.

Your fingers automatically played a song you’d written a while ago, when you’d first realized you were in love with your best friend. It was a soft song, a sweet melody with melancholic undertones. You knew how hopeless this was.

Minho nudged the balcony door sideways as he stepped out, settling on the chair next to you with a cup of coffee in his hands.

You stopped playing, tucking your hair behind your ear. Minho frowned as he turned to look at you.

“Why’d you stop? That sounds beautiful.”

You smiled bashfully, looking away to hide your blush. “Eh, it’s just something I came up with one day.”

Minho scoffed. “Are you kidding? Y/n...you’re so talented. I really admire you. I wish I could be the same.”

It was your turn to scoff in disbelief as you turned your chair slightly so that you were facing him. “Have you seen yourself dance? You pour your emotion into every step. That’s admirable.”

Minho smiled softly as he gazed at you. He drummed his fingers on the side of the chair. “If you like my dancing, how come you never come to the studio to watch?”

You rolled your eyes. “Sorry Minho, but I’m not into the idea of someone mistaking me to be one of your gawking fangirls.”

His smile dropped. “What’s wrong with that?”

You shook your head, leaning back as you looked at the sky.

He paused for a moment, before nudging you slowly. You looked at him, breath hitching as your eyes met his beautiful, galaxy-filled ones.

“Play something for me.”

“Any particular song you’d like?”

“Nah. Just something you wrote. The first thing that comes to your mind.”

So you played the song you’d been playing when he interrupted you. Minho closed his eyes, letting himself get lost in your music.

“Is this a dream or a nightmare? Can’t bring myself to care.”

You sang softly under your breath, gaze flitting to the boy in front of you from time to time.

You ended the song with slight tears in your eyes.

“Cause I love you...it hurts, but I do.”

You quickly wiped your tears away as Minho’s eyes opened. He looked at you, mouth opening and closing as he tried to think of something to say. His heart was pounding, and he didn’t know why.

All he knew was that you looked ethereal with the moonlight washing over you, eyes shining as your fingers rested over the strings.

Minho felt suffocated. He was outraged at himself, his breath catching as he got up so suddenly that the chair fell over. He didn’t bother to say anything, walking back into the living room and going straight to his bed, locking it as he put his head in his hands.

What was that funny feeling residing in his chest and his stomach? Honestly...it always happened when you sang or played your guitar, but never in this intensity. He didn’t like it. He needed it to stop.

There was heavy knocking on the door. Minho collected himself, peering through his keyhole. You stood there with your hands on your hips, anger evident in your face.

“What the fuck? You’ve been doing this a lot lately. Tell me, what’s wrong?”

Minho breathed in. He told himself it was normal. Everything was normal...nothing had changed. He squashed the feelings deep down in his chest. He reminded himself of his top priority, telling himself that these were all merely side effects caused by the little project you both had going on.

He ignored you, plopping himself down on the bed and trying to block everything out.

•••

The next morning, Minho apologized to you as you served him breakfast, which happened to be pancakes.

“I was just thinking of how I’m still very nervous about the whole Rina situation. I’m terrified. Sorry I took it out on you. We need her to really be convinced...so how about we go on a date tomorrow?”

You were still a little miffed, but you brushed it aside. You were too tired to hold a grudge at this point. “A...date?”

“Yeah. Let’s go to the coffee shop that she’s always visiting. Mera told me that she’s always hanging out with her friends at The Little Leaf after classes. ”

You’d forgotten that Mera and Rina were best friends. You scrunched your face up, nodding. “Alright.”

“We’ll walk there together in the afternoon, and make sure there’s no doubts left in her brain.”

•••

You walked beside Minho. He seemed to be in more of a cheerful mood, swinging your intertwined hands as he hummed.

He looked really good in his camel-brown jacket and white shirt. He’d insisted that the two of you wear matching colours so that you could really drive the point home- which is why you were wearing a cream sweater and a tan pleated skirt, one which was way too short and had to be constantly pulled down.

“You look cute.” He said as the Little Leaf came into view.

You tried not to blush. “You look nice too.”

“Just nice?” He raised an eyebrow and you giggled.

“I mean, hot. Super hot. Rugged and handsome.” You said half-jokingly, watching as he wiggled his eyebrows and laughed.

Through the window, you could see Mera, and two other girls you didn’t know the names of. The fourth girl sitting in the corner was clearly recognizable by her fiery red hair.

Minho breathed in deeply. “You ready?”

“Uh huh.”

“Here we go.”

The door swung open, the little bells on top tinkling. Minho led you to the counter.

“I’ll have an americano, please. The lady will have a strawberry milkshake.” He looked to you with a crooked smile. “Isn’t that right?”

You nodded, smiling. “Oh, a blueberry cheesecake too, please.”

Both of you made your way to an empty table that happened to be right in front of the girls.

Mera was the first to notice, her eyes wide as she saw the two of you sitting down. She nudged Rina, pointing.

You saw this out of the corner of your eye, and you were satisfied. “They’re noticing,” you whispered. “Good.” Minho said.

“So. About yesterday. I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have stormed out on you like that.”

“It’s okay. I just...did I do something wrong?”

Minho shook his head. “No. Not at all. I was just really on edge.”

You nodded.

A waiter came, setting down your drinks and the cheesecake. You noticed that he was someone you’d worked with on a project once.

“Wait...Juyeon?”

Minho looked up, frowning.

Juyeon smiled. “Y/n! It’s nice seeing you here.” He gave Minho a cursory glance, before focusing his attention back on you.

“Likewise! I didn’t know you worked here! I’ll come by more often, then.”

“Do that. I’d even give you free cupcakes.” Juyeon winked at you, before turning to leave. Minho watched him go with an angry expression, before turning back to you.

“Uh, what the fuck?”

You took a sip of your milkshake before cocking your head to the side. “Huh?”

“You were flirting with that guy.”

“I wasn’t!” You said, glaring. “I was being nice. And need I remind you that you have no right to be jealous? We’re not actually dating.”

Minho scoffed. “Jealous? Don’t fucking flatter yourself. I am fully aware that this is all fake, trust me. However, you flirting with the waiter might give people the wrong impression, especially because the whole reason we came here is to convince Rina that we’re dating.” He snorted. “Jealous. That’s rich.”

You pursed your lips, saying nothing. Taking a fork, you took a piece of the cheesecake and shoved it in your mouth.

Minho sighed. “I’m sorry.”

You swallowed. “Minho...sorry doesn’t cut it anymore.” You said sadly.

He stared at you, before shaking his head sadly. Nodding, he took his drink and lifted it to his lips. “This is the most awkward date ever. Rina’s never gonna believe this. Our body language gives it all away.”

You shrugged. “Well, what do you propose?”

Minho paused, before laughing loudly, turning his head slightly to see if the girls noticed. You rolled your eyes.

“What a dork.” You said fondly. He put his hand on top of yours. Rina and Mera were watching, and he needed to give them a show. He took a fork of his own and dug it into the cake, lifting it to your mouth.

“Say aaah, baby.”

You giggled before opening your mouth, letting him feed you. Minho’s smile was intoxicating. You felt the butterflies in your stomach run amok as you stared into his eyes.

Minho felt it too. As he spooned the cake into your mouth, he felt his heart flutter. Babying you was actually quite enjoyable. ‘I should do it more often,’ he thought.

He watched as you munched, your cheeks so full that you looked like a hamster. It was an endearing habit, one that made him want to kiss your face all over.

Wait, what?

Minho slammed the spoon down on the table all of a sudden. You looked up at him, confused. “I need to go.” He stammered, standing up and walking to the door as fast as he could.

You sat in your chair, eyes wide, before looking down. Why was he doing this? You were doing nothing but help him...yet he kept storming out randomly with no explanation, whatsoever.

It took a while for you to realize that someone was standing in front of you. When they cleared their throat, you looked up.

Rina smiled sympathetically.

“He’s a pain, isn’t he? From what I’ve seen, he doesn’t treat you very well.”

The girls standing next to her nodded. Rina stared at her nails. “Don’t you feel tired of being his girlfriend, especially when you know what he’s like?”

You frowned. “What do you mean?”

“You know. He’s just a fuckboy without any substance. Come on...I know you’d like some revenge too. Help us give him what he deserves.”

You chuckle humorlessly. “That’s real funny. Fuck off.”

You got up, brushing your skirt. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go find my boyfriend.”

You pushed past them, running out of the shop and down the street. It took you a while to finally find him. He walked languidly, hands in his pockets.

You ran until you’re standing right in front of him. He stopped in his tracks, raising an eyebrow. “What the fuck do you want?”

You sighed, reaching for his hand. “Minho, you have to tell me why you’re acting like this. Besides...something happened back there that I think you should know-“

Minho shook your hand off roughly. “Y/n. I’ll say this once. Fuck off. Go home.”

You push him angrily. “You dickhead, we live in the same place. And I did nothing to deserve this.” You said, reaching for his hand again.

“Touch me again, and I swear to God...look, I’m not coming home. I might be there by evening. Just give me space.”

You tried not to look hurt. Suddenly, out of the corner of your eye you saw Rina and her friends standing near her car. They’d clearly already seen half of what was going on. Fuck, you had to salvage the situation.

You grabbed Minho’s cheeks and pressed your lips to his hurriedly, electricity jolting through you as you realized what you’d just done.

Minho made a shocked sound. He felt his heart run berserk, unaware that you were feeling the very same thing. You wanted to cry. This was not how you’d imagined your first kiss with Minho would go. It was a rough, insincere kiss, one with no feelings behind it whatsoever...or so you thought.

You opened your eyes slightly and saw that the girls had already left. You let Minho push you away.

He wiped his lips with the back of his hand, looking at you in disgust.

“Why the fuck did you do that? No kisses was a part of the agreement, and there’s no one around.”

You wiped your wet eyes, tears threatening to spill. “Rina was standing there the whole time. She saw our fight. Back in the cafe, she also told me to join forces with her. Just thought you should know that she’s still looking for revenge.”

You turned around, half-running as you got away from him, the tears flowing freely. He watched you leave, his face blank, as he processed the information you’d spewed at him.

You felt your heart harden. You’d been thinking about it for a while...but you were sure of it now. Minho didn’t deserve your love.

[spectrumed]

3. sadness

Don’t be like that. Be like this, or be that other thing. Be unique, but don’t be too unique. Fit in, but try to be a rebel. Be a renegade, but don’t rock the boat. Don’t know what you are supposed to be? What? Do you have imposter syndrome or something? Just be yourself, but, y’know, sand down the edges a little bit. Be friendlier. Be the kind of person everyone likes. Be the life of the party! Don’t be some shut-in, some crazy cat-lady with absolutely zero social life. Don’t be sad. Don’t burden others with your sadness. Work to maximise the total happiness of your community. A smile goes a long way. Can’t smile? You really can’t help but being a sourpuss all the time? Well, I guess maybe that if you can’t help but stay in a perpetual bad mood bringing everyone else down… then maybe you should just stay isolated? Better stay alone, away from others. You’re toxic. You’re just so damned sad. You really must be quarantined.

I am sad, a lot of the time. Are you? But, no, you can’t just admit that you are sad. Don’t be a buzzkill, try to inject a little humour into the things you say. You can admit you’re depressed, if you do so with a joke. Don’t let others know you’re being sincere. Ironic jokes work the best, don’t they? They let you confess your secret gloom to everyone around, but they’ll never know just how serious you’re being. With a wink of the eye, any candid expression of your inner turmoil can become a hilarious post-modern gag. Are they or are they not telling the truth? Oh, I’ll never tell! And it will all work out excellent, up until the day you commit suicide. But every comedian’s time in the limelight has to end at some point, right?

This blog is supposed to be about autism spectrum disorder, why am I suddenly discussing depression? Well, I suppose that it is time we bring to the table this little thing called comorbidity. Psychology is messy. Some would argue that it is barely even a real scientific field (I tend to think that it is the best thing we have, but I acknowledge that in places, psychology is fundamentally flawed.) You may have thought that you’d get just one diagnosis. One simple label that you can work through and overcome. You’re bipolar, now go deal with it! But instead, you find yourself with a whole fistful of diagnoses. What to hear my proud list of diagnoses? Oh, please, don’t think because I am listing them this one certain way, I put them in order of relevancy to me. I love all of my diagnoses equally.

My diagnoses are:

Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD)

Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD)

Agoraphobia

Possible Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Asperger syndrome (AS)

No, I was never officially diagnosed with depression, but largely because, at the time I received these diagnoses, my depression was so blatant that it felt as if I was walking around with a cloud of miasma surrounding at all times. Imagine me as Pig-Pen from Peanuts, but instead of being covered in dirt, I was covered in the funk of melancholy. And whatever treatment I would eventually go on to receive (and still am receiving to this day,) would go about treating my anxiety first, and hopefully, the depression would give in alongside the anxiety. It has, for the most part, though, I still feel the presence of that black dog from time to time. I also got only a half-hearted potential diagnosis of OCD, but later, during a trial of an antidepressant that had a freakishly negative impact on my psyche, it blossomed into a fully-grown attention-craving condition. Turns out that OCD can be a real hog for the spotlight, really not allowing any of the other diagnoses to take their turn on stage. Thankfully, when I got off that particular antidepressant, those symptoms stopped, but it has led me to be far more aware of my internal obsessive-compulsive thought patterns. For me, OCD largely lacks physical compulsions, but my mind is ablaze with intrusive thoughts, and I will routinely force myself to repeat certain phrases in my head to make them go away. The funny thing is, I never realised that wasn’t normal.

Diagnoses are an attempt to map out a spiders’ web of problems. Things come hand in hand. While I’m no psychologist, I can speak from the perspective of someone who has been through the psychiatric process, which I suppose, lends me a certain kind of expertise, doesn’t it? Maybe it really doesn’t. Maybe I’m just throwing words out there, thinking that I could serve a good purpose, but instead all I am doing is contributing to this great onslaught of digital disinformation we’re all suffering under. But I’m probably just too doubtful of myself. I am speaking about myself, after all. I’ve got first-hand experience in being myself. I know exactly what it feels like to own this skin, these bones, this heart, and this mushy brain of mine. I’m not claiming to know everything. I’m just claiming to know about this one sad individual writing this hoping it might allow someone to reblog my posts with the hashtag “relatable” one day.

Anxiety runs in my family. The neurosis demon gets passed down from generation to generation, only occasionally skipping a beat. My mother and I share many of the same neurotic quirks, though, she has for the most part of her life not had it to quite the excessive degree that I have it. I really took that genetic predisposition for anxiety and ran with it. And while I’m the only person in my family to have gotten diagnosed as being “on the spectrum,” there are a few members that I kinda sort of in a way actually quite seriously suspect might also be here somewhere on the spectrum. Still, as always goes with diagnosing, there’s no point in doing it unless the person is in need of some kind of treatment. I wholeheartedly believe that most people on the planet belong to one spectrum, be it an autism spectrum, a bipolar spectrum, a narcissism spectrum, even a schizophrenic spectrum, but diagnoses should be exclusively reserved for those who need psychiatric care. The world is a spectrum, and it’s worth noting that the terms “sane” and “insane” do not alone capture the complexity of the human psyche. A person can appear perfectly sensible, yet at some point in their life, they may have been a real silly little bugger who thought that their pet hamster was the reincarnation of the Buddha. Just as with physical health, one can struggle with one's mental health for one period in their life, only to later on in life feel utterly and entirely mentally healthy. Or, well, sadly in a lot of cases, people who were perfectly mentally healthy may suddenly become diagnosed with dementia. But that’s really sad, so let’s not talk about that.

Is it all genetic? Well, no. Or well, maybe? In regards to autism, I am pretty sure that, yes, it is genetic. While, yes, I do admit that I’m just a dummy on the internet, so what do I really know? And the brain is such a complex bit of mushy meat, so I could always be proven wrong. Though, I tend towards thinking that there most likely is principally a genetic factor to conditions like autism, or attention deficit disorder (and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder,) or things like bipolar disorder. But with anxiety, quite frankly, I can’t say how much of it is nurture and how much of it is nature. I mentioned that my mother and I share many of the same neurotic quirks, so that would imply that there is something in one's genes that can make some more prone to anxiety than others, but my mother does not struggle with agoraphobia, nor does she seem to have any obsessive-compulsive tendencies. In fact, in my family, even those that exhibit some element of heightened anxiety, they don’t seem to show any milder symptoms of this kind. I can’t help but feel as if these conditions I gained through that tortuous period of every boy’s and girl’s (and boy-girl’s) life is called puberty. I hate to conform to stereotypes but I did indeed hate being a teenager. Believe it or not, I wasn’t a jock, and no, I didn’t go to parties. I mostly spent my time crying.

The question that no doubt plagues every movie psychiatrist to no end is what kind of trauma must a person undergo to make them go mad? Abusive parents? Abusive uncles? Abusive teachers? Abusive dogs? Honestly, to be an adult raising a child must be rough, considering how any mistake you make might suddenly turn your little babe into a future serial killer. Now, there’s no doubt that there are some seriously terrible parents out there, and that a lot of people have mental woes that definitely came about due to their parents and their abysmal lack of parental care. But generally, how much can you actually blame on your parents? We know the cliché, let’s go sit down on the sofa and complain to our Freudian hack-shrink all about those times as a kid our dad missed the big game, or that time our mother embarrassed us in front of all of our friends. I have plenty of things to complain about my parents, like I believe we all have. Our parents are flawed, messy human beings, of course they occasionally made mistakes throughout our upbringings. But is that nearly enough to turn a person mentally ill? Putting up with an at times really embarrassing mom? No, I don’t think so. And of course, there are some real awful parents out there, I’m not doubting that. Trust me, I’m a fan of true crime, so I’ve heard some real grizzly stories of what some kids are forced to grow up with. But I am thinking that those instances are more rare than they are common. Most people with mental illnesses can most likely not blame their parents.

How ‘bout bullies? Yes, them bullies. Them awful mean bullies that made all of our lives so painful. It’s funny, it seems like every school had their own fair share of bullies, and yet no-one as an adult ever comes forward to admit that they themselves were the bullies. It’s almost like as if no-one ever thinks of themselves as being a bully, even when they are throwing rocks at that weird chubby kid with blonde hair who happens to be named Fredrik and who just wants to be left alone. Was I bullied? Well… yes. But I can’t say I got the brunt of it. I got bullied, but overall I’d say I only ever had it slightly worse than most people. I was still quite tall, typically taller than my classmates growing up, and for the most part I could roll with the punches. If you really want to talk about a kid I knew growing up that got bullied, let me tell you about this kid who knew all the right dances for all the right Britney Spears songs. He was gay, I think. Not quite old enough to have come out, I suspect, but, well... He liked all the female pop stars, but not in that way of wanting to kiss them and fondle their boobies, but in the “I want to sound just like them when I grow up” sort of way. I don’t know what happened to him (or them, or her, depending on how they identify now,) but that was real bullying. Like most folks, I found myself stuck in that limbo of seeing others get bullied far worse than me and being too cowardly to intervene, in fears that I’d end up taking their place. Yes, isn’t school just a marvellous place? It’s a wonder any of us turn out okay.

No, I think that, fundamentally, the problems I have arose with myself. This, blaming myself, is not something that I am unused to doing. I have a long history of blaming myself, that’s really the problem. As a teenager I knew that I was different, and I was frightened and scared of being exposed. I didn’t even really know what it was that was different about me, I just knew that I didn’t fit in. I felt as if I didn’t deserve to fit in. The older I got, the more intense these feelings got. And I started taking it out on myself. I started hating myself. And I really mean furiously hating myself. It wasn’t some casual self-loathing, it was searing self-hatred. I did not physically hurt myself, but I did engage with self-harm. I kept repeating the mantras of “I hate myself,” and “I am pathetic,” over and over again, with the ultimate goal of making myself cry. For a period, I couldn’t go to bed without making myself cry first. I began taking days off from school, pretending to be sick. Well, I suppose I was ill, but not physically. I began failing most of my classes, I only ended up doing well in art. I stayed away from school for whole weeks at the time. Once, when I shame-facedly returned to school some of the meaner boys came up to me and said that they were surprised to learn that I was still alive. They were surprised, but also a little disappointed.

This was a time in my life when I really needed psychiatric care. This became increasingly obvious to my parents, and my teachers. I was clearly suffering from depression. Not just some teenaged angst, but full-blown, wholly insidious, depression. But, well, I didn’t get the care that I needed. Oh, I did go to see a psychologist a couple of times, but she saw no reason for me to continue seeing her. I don’t know why she felt as if I wasn’t in need of help, frankly, I can’t fathom why she felt as if I wasn’t in need of help. I suppose I avoided telling her the truth of what went on inside of my head, but I feel like as if any good psychologist would have been able to tell that the kid sitting across from them was clearly suffering from something a tad more intense than just some common concerns about puberty. At most I was able to confess was that I was feeling ashamed over myself for getting so fat, but it should have been clear to anybody that I was only using that as a hook to hang my self-hatred on. There very clearly was some underlying condition that I had that should have gotten addressed. But it went ignored.

At most I can think to explain this is the fact that I wasn’t “problematic.” Not in the way some kids are, when they’re struggling with their mental health. I did not act out, I did not take drugs, and I was certainly not violent. Even to this day, though I have at many times suffered from suicidal ideation, I am a real low-risk for actual suicide considering my intense fear of dying (yes, that’s an odd combo to have.) So, I’ve come to realise that the only way I am getting treatment is if I actually seek out treatment. And back then, I was just as placid as I had previously always been. I was quiet and introverted, just desperate to get back home so I could go and hide in my room. Many teenagers are like that. And it is easy to ignore them, because they want to be ignored. They just don’t want to exist. When you are desperate to be left alone, eventually people will leave you alone. I would go on to receive psychiatric care later on my life, but only after several years passed. I did have a better time living in my later teenage years, but like with a bone that heals wrong, I needed someone to come in and sort me out. I was sad as a teenager, but I would become really sad as a twenty-something. Hopefully my thirties will be jolly.

[littlejeanniebean]

''Did you say i love you?'' ''Me?! No!''

@constancezin!!! I don’t know why this was such a hard prompt for me?? Like I just wanted it to be perfect for you, I guess xx

Also, you didn’t name a ship, so I went with Marichat, since I know you like them as well as Jily :)

I Don’t Think You’re Smoking Hot

“Mon Dieu, I am so over him!” Marinette flung herself across her room on her swivel chair — a big mistake. She tumbled over the floor, limbs flailing, only to jump back up again as though nothing had happened. “That’s right! You heard me, Tikki! Adrien Agreste is canceled!” 

The little red bug gasped. “Marinette! Surely, you don’t mean that!”

“Oh-ho, but I do!” she continued to seethe. “I most certainly do!” 

“He was akumatized, Marinette! He didn’t mean to say the things he said!”

“Critiquitty made everyone speak their mind honestly, Tikki. He meant them, alright.”

“Maybe you misunderstood him —”

“How does someone misunderstand ‘I don’t think you’re smoking hot?’” the girl shrieked. 

Before Tikki could reply, there was a knock on the window of Marinette’s balcony. There was only one person that could possibly be.

“Go away, Chat!” she snapped.

Persistently, he knocked again. “Alya sent me! Said you ran off after the akuma attack! She wanted to know if you were alright!”

“Well, I’m not! So you can just leave me alone!”

“As a superhero —” he managed to pick the lock with the fine point of his glove-claw. “— I’m afraid I can’t do that in good conscience, Princess.”

“Where was your annoying chivalry when Ladybug needed you out there today,” she pouted, already knowing the answer. She had just been looking forward to ranting to her partner, who was at a similar crossroads in his love life, sort of. He’d come to terms with them just being friends, although she suspected he’d only been able to because he was still meeting her as Marinette and falling in love with her all over again. Ugh, why was her life like this? 

“I took off my ring as soon as I got akumatized as a civilian. Couldn’t risk revealing my secret identity. Milady knows, of course.” 

“Of course.”

“So… what seems to be the problem?”

“Do you think I’m smoking hot?”

Chat blinked and blushed. “Uh… Well… I mean…”

“Ugh!” She hurled a pillow at him. “Look, I know I’m short and munchkin-like, but I can be hot!”

“I mean, ‘hot’ isn’t the best descriptor —”

“You’re not making this any better for yourself —”

“— I would call you ‘beautiful.’”

A tiny shriek from Tikki might’ve been heard from behind the laundry basket had Marinette not screamed even louder. 

Chat winced and cupped his sensitive cat ears. “Princess…?”

“Mon Dieu!” She clutched her forehead as her pupils dilated in horror. “The things I said to Adrien! I didn’t let him finish! Ugh! Great job, Marinette Dupain-Cheng!”

“Uh… Adrien, huh?” Chat chuckled nervously.

Marinette didn’t seem to hear him. She just kept ranting, “I mean not that I assume that’s what he was going to say, I mean, he’s a model for crying out loud — he must know a lot of beautiful people — but I mean, I could’ve at least let him finish before saying those awful things to him that were absolutely not true at all! Ugh! Now he’s never going to forgive me and we’re never going to be friends, nevermind, get married and have two-point-five children and a hamster!” She snuck a side-glance at Chat. She always swooned extra hard over Adrien when he was around, hoping to make him lose interest or something, but he just kept coming around, probably because he thought it was a hopeless celebrity crush, which it was, except for the hopeless part… right? 

Anyway, now Chat was looking at her like she hung the moon or something and his lips just barely moved.

Marinette stopped pacing (read: stomping) and blinked dumbfoundedly at him. “Did… Did you say ‘I love you?’” 

“Me?!” Chat sat up straighter so suddenly, he fell off the footstool he was perched on. “No! Why would I say that? I know you love Adrien and you’re a civilian — everyone knows it’s always dangerous for a superhero to date a civilian and I’d never do that to you, Princess — and just because I call you ‘Princess’ doesn’t mean I’m in love with you — not that you’re not totally lovable, because you definitely are — Mon Dieu...” His face was as red as a tomato and he buried it in his hands. “Look, j-just call Adrien and apologize. I’m sure he’d understand. Tell him you only got upset because you hold his opinion in the highest esteem —”

“‘Highest esteem?’” Marinette tried for sarcasm, but she was still processing Chat’s messy declaration-slash-admission-of-guilt, so it didn’t really fly.

“He’s a highly-educated rich kid. It’ll translate well, believe me —”

“He’s not stuck up! He’s one of the sweetest, kindest, most genuine —”

“Then why did you automatically assume all that was a lie and he really thought you weren’t beautiful? Because I mean, have you seen yourself? — I mean, no! Don’t read into that! — Um… look, he must’ve just not realized he was doing it. Even the nicest of the elite can unintentionally say something snobbish when they’ve grown up in a bubble.”

“You seem to know a lot about their psyche for an alley cat.” Marinette crossed her arms.

“On the contrary, these ears hear multitudes,” Chat waved her off dismissively. “Anyway, I have to go. Hero stuff.”

“Chat —”

“See you around, Princess.” He launched himself out of the window in her roof. 

Marinette sighed as Tikki floated up to eye-level. 

“His advice is sound,” the kwami encouraged her.

“Yeah, yeah, alright.” The girl picked up her phone.

Adrien answered on the first ring. “Marinette! I’m so sorry about the way I came across earlier —”

“I’m so sorry about the things I said to you, Adrien —”

“— Nino told me right after you left that that was the worst way to tell a girl she was beautiful and he’s absolutely right —”

“— I didn’t mean a word of it. I was just upset because I hold your opinion in the highest esteem.”

“... ‘highest esteem,’ huh?” He was probably smirking or something, leaning against the nearest stable fixture the way he does when he knows he has the upper hand in a situation. 

“You know what I mean.” Marinette face-palmed. That was the last time she was taking advice from an alley cat. “So… friends?”

“Always, Mari. And just for the record, if words like ‘beautiful’ and ‘enchanting’ and ‘wonderful’ didn’t exist, I would absolutely call you ‘smoking hot.’”

Marinette’s face turned beet-red and she screamed into the receiver, “Okay, thanks, you too, bye, love you, I mean, no, I mean, not that I don’t love you, I mean, goodnight, Adrien!” Then she hung up and screamed into her pillow.

[mikauzoran]

Marichat/Adrienette: Serendipity: Fifty Marichat and Adrienette Kisses: Kiss Fifty

Read it on AO3: Serendipity: Fifty Marichat and Adrienette Kisses: ...out of love.

“Stop moving around so much,” Plagg grumbled as he snuggled up against the crook of Adrien’s neck.

“Leave him alone,” Trixx admonished groggily, burrowing further into the nest he’d made out of Adrien’s hair. “He’s got a lot on his mind; it’s no wonder he can’t sleep.”

“Thinking about the wedding tomorrow and how you’re going to smooch the love of your life in front of all of your friends and family?” Plagg snickered, giving Adrien’s shoulder a playful nip.

“Thinking about how Marinette is making the biggest mistake of her life,” Adrien snorted, twisting his engagement ring round and round on his finger, watching the EKG heartbeat-like line as it dipped and soared around the center of the band.

“Don’t say that,” Plagg commanded, flying up to stare Adrien down with a scowl.

Adrien shrugged, avoiding Plagg’s gaze. He pulled off the ring and looked at the inscription on the inside of the band: Home. Love. Family. Forever.

“She could do better,” he muttered.

“But she picked you,” Trixx reminded softly, petting Adrien’s hair.

“You’re just psyching yourself out,” Plagg diagnosed. “Stop fretting, Kid. Go to sleep, and things will look brighter in the morning. You’ll marry your girl, have a big party with lots of tasty food, and everything will be alright.”

Adrien hummed noncommittally in response, closing his eyes in order to make another attempt.

Fifteen minutes later, when Adrien was still tossing and turning, Plagg gave a resigned sigh. “Okay. Clearly, this isn’t working. Let’s go for a run and burn off some of your nerves.”

Adrien gave a mirthless chuckle, turning onto his side to gaze at Plagg melancholically. “Man, I must be pretty bad if you’re volunteering your services so willingly.”

Plagg rolled his eyes, waving away the suggestion. “You’re just driving me nuts, and I want to get some sleep. Think of this as a wedding present.”

“Plagg’s really a big softie,” Trixx chortled, tail flicking mischievously. “He just doesn’t want anyone to know, so he puts on the obnoxious, slothful act.”

“Hush, you,” Plagg hissed, his own tail giving an annoyed twitch. “There’s no acting about my sloth. I really am this lazy, thank you very much.”

“I’d believe it,” Adrien snickered, the laughter breaking through his glum mood. “All right. Let’s go for a run. I guess it can’t hurt anything. Plagg, transform me.”

 He spent the first ten minutes or so of his run aimlessly leaping from rooftop to rooftop, dodging antennas and hopping over chimney stacks, seeing how fast he could go in an attempt to burn off some energy and tire himself out.

He soon got bored of that, however, and decided to make his way to the Eiffel Tower, a site of various special moments including the time five years prior when Marinette had arranged a picnic and told him that she loved him for the first time.

He bounded to the top of the tower, flying from girder to steel girder until he found himself at the pinnacle of the monument.

Surprisingly, he wasn’t alone.

Marinette’s eyes widened at her partner’s unexpected arrival, but then a warm smile stretched across her lips and all the way up to her eyes. “Good evening, Chaton. What a lovely coincidence meeting you here.”

“Likewise, My Ladylove,” he chuckled, giving her a supernova grin in return. “Though, I think it’s more morning than evening at this point.”

She shrugged, motioning for him to join her.

“Aren’t you cold?” he couldn’t help but ask as he came to stand beside her at the railing, observing her thin, cotton pyjamas and little cardigan that couldn’t be keeping out the slightly chilly breeze. “It’s kind of nippy up here.”

Marinette shook her head as she gazed out at the city sprawling before her. “I like it, actually. It makes me feel alert. I won’t stay up here untransformed long, though, so don’t worry.”

He slipped his arm around her, pulling her into his side to share a little of his warmth. Despite what she said, he could see her beginning to shiver.

“Do you mind me asking what a pretty girl like you is doing all by your lonesome in a place like this at this time of night, or is that being too forward?” he inquired playfully, giving his eyebrows a waggle.

Lightly, she slapped his arm, shaking her head. “I couldn’t sleep. I just had a lot on my mind, so…”

“…Like…what?” he tentatively pressed, the teasing tone gone from his voice now as he wondered if her head was filled with worries like his.

She shrugged. “How everything’s going to be different after tomorrow and how I don’t think I’m ready. Like…we’ll be officially moving in together, and what if the kitchen faucet starts leaking?”

Chat blinked and began to open his mouth to tell her that the building supervisor took care of upkeep and things like that, but she spoke again before he could, her worries snowballing and carrying her away with them.

“I don’t know how to fix a leaky faucet,” she reported anxiously. “I know you call someone, but Maman and Papá are always the ones to arrange for things like that, and I don’t even know how they find the person, so…and there’s grocery shopping and paying bills and keeping the apartment tidy and making all of our own meals and starting a family, and what am I going to do if the kids get sick?” she gasped as if suddenly realizing that this was an important issue that she had failed to attend to.

Chat had to smile at her penchant to get way ahead of herself.

“Don’t worry, Princess,” he cooed, leaning in to press a comforting kiss to the outer shell of her ear. “We’ll figure it out. I mean, we could always call your parents if we have questions, but I’ve been living on my own for almost four years now, and I haven’t died yet, so…I think, whatever comes our way, we can take it on together. We’ve proven ourselves to be a great team over and over again. This is just one more thing where we’ll have to pool our strengths and figure it out together…right?”

Slowly, she started to nod as she absorbed his words.

Her worry receded as she called to mind all the other times they seemed to be facing down unbeatable odds together. They had always made it out so long as they fought side to side, so why should surviving adulthood be any different?

“You’re right,” she realized, her easy smile coming back as she leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his torso. “We can do this…. Thanks for talking me down.”

“Any time you need it,” he promised, catching the top of her head in a quick, affectionate kiss.

There was a comfortable moment where they stood there together, looking out at their city and enjoying each other’s solid, grounding presence, before Chat Noir tentatively spoke up.

“…Want to come back to the apartment with me and snuggle?” he inquired sheepishly, a light pink blush peeking out from underneath his mask and coloring his cheeks. “I don’t want you to go, but I don’t want to keep you out either,” he confessed. “I know it’s the middle of summer, but the breeze really is chilly up here, and I don’t want you getting sick.”

“Alright,” she chuckled, easily giving in. “I don’t really feel like going our separate ways either. Carry me? For old times’ sake?” She gazed up at him, batting her eyelashes prettily.

He laughed as he effortlessly scooped her up. “As my Princess commands.”

She held on tight as he bounced back across the rooftops towards the apartment that they would soon officially share.

He let them in through his bedroom window and set her down on the bed, releasing his transformation as he attacked her neck with playful kisses.

Marinette giggled and squirmed as his nips and licks tickled her.

He stopped before long and pushed himself up on his elbows to gaze down at her in adoration as her chest heaved in her attempt to catch her breath.

Her dazzling smile lit up the dim, moonlit room, and she reached up to play with his hair, brushing it out of his eyes and twisting it around her fingers.

She lifted her head to ghost her lips against his and then lowered back down onto the bed, laughing.

“What?” he wondered softly.

“I’m happy,” she explained, smiling wider.

“Me too,” he whispered, leaning in to nuzzle her ear.

“Good,” she hummed contentedly. “So…what were you doing out for a run? Couldn’t sleep?”

He stiffened, knowing she would scold him if she knew why he’d been worrying. “Yeah,” he replied cagily. “Just a lot of stuff on my mind. You know.”

She took his face in her hands to make him meet her eyes. “Anything I can help with?”

He shook his head, averting his gaze as best as he could. “Nah, not really. It’s just silly things. I’m just being silly.”

“It’s not silly if you’re worried about it,” she patiently reminded. “I mean, I was keeping myself up fretting about how to fix a leaky faucet and what to do if our future hamster gets sick, so…whatever you’re worrying about, it can’t be any more ridiculous than my worries. Talk to me. Let me see if I can help you like you helped me earlier. We are a team after all…right?”

How could he argue with that?

With a tired sigh, he turned to meet her gaze, confessing shamefacedly, “I was fretting about what a big mistake you’re making by marrying me.”

She blinked at him uncomprehendingly. “Wait. What? Adrien, what are you talking about?” Her eyes narrowed in concern as she stroked his face comfortingly.

“You could find someone better, Marinette,” he explained as if reluctant to inform her yet duty-bound to make sure she understood all of her options. “I’m sure there’s someone out there better suited to you, and I don’t want to trap you in this relationship with me knowing that—”

“—Adrien, stop,” she commanded gently, pushing them both up to sitting.

He looked at her searchingly. “But—”

“—No,” she firmly interrupted. “Okay. Maybe you’re right that some guy exists out there who would be completely perfect for me in every way, but you know what?”

He cocked his head to the side listening carefully.

“I don’t want him,” she declared resolutely. “I don’t want a perfect life with a perfect partner where everything is always easy and effortless.”

“You…don’t?” He blinked at her, baffled.

“I don’t,” she confirmed. “Adrien, one of the things I treasure most about our relationship is the hard parts, the times when we’ve really struggled to make it work, the things we’ve overcome together. I love that we’ve come together as a team time and again and that we’ve made it through and are still standing after all of that,” she stressed.

“That’s why I calmed down about all the stuff I was worried about when you reminded me that we’d take on whatever problems came up together. I believed you because we’ve gotten through apocalypses together before, so I know we can do it again. We’re tougher because of all the garbage we’ve been through,” she cooed squeezing his hand.

He squeezed back, unable to find his voice to reply.

“Why would I ever pick some seemingly perfect guy over you?” she continued to obliterate his fears, shaking her head at his ever having doubted. “They say you don’t really know a person until you’re buried up to your neck in crap together,” she chuckled at the memories, and he couldn’t help but grin at the past catastrophes that were now comic. “I know you, and you know me, and I know I can count on you no matter what. I wouldn’t trade our partnership for anything, Adrien.”

He nodded, seeing now how ridiculous his worries had been.

“You are the one I want…” She gave his hands another firm squeeze. “…rough edges and all…because your rough edges line up with mine, and I don’t think I could find anyone more perfect for me if I tried.”

He blinked back tears at that, completely overwhelmed by a raging cocktail of emotions. Far too many people had looked at him and declared him perfect without ever knowing about the dark, ugly parts inside of him. Yet, here she was, fully cognizant of the insecurities and the faults, declaring him perfect for her because of the ways in which he was broken.

“Maybe on the surface other people might look better,” she conceded, looking him full in the face and giving him a smile full of acceptance and love. “but you and I have been through fire together, and I know we can make it out on the other side in one piece, so…don’t doubt yourself. You’re the only one I’ve ever wanted fighting by my side and having my back…whether that’s battling akumas or changing diapers or paying the bills or succeeding in our careers. You’re the one I love, and you’re the one I want to marry, Adrien.”

With a wordless sob, he pulled her into him, squeezing her close and pulling her down onto the bed beside him so that he could bury his face in her neck.

She wrapped her arms around him, holding him together as he let it all out.

“Shh,” she coaxed. “It’s okay.”

He trembled, overcome by joy and relief and all-encompassing warmth.

“Did you like that little preview of my vows?” she chuckled fondly as she pet his hair.

“You’re going to make me cry tomorrow,” he choked, lifting his head to kiss her cheek. “Thank you.”

“Any time you need it,” she repeated his earlier promise, meaning it wholeheartedly. She knew he had always struggled with self-worth and didn’t always believe that he deserved love and good things, so she had sworn to herself always to build him up and support him.

“I’ll text Alya to remind Nino to have tissues on hand,” she added as an afterthought.

“Please,” he whimpered, loosening his hold on her to shift into a comfortable snuggling position. “I’m going to be a mess tomorrow.”

“You’ll still look gorgeous with tears and snot dripping down your face. Don’t worry,” she assured, breaking away to pull down the covers.

Reluctantly, he got up so that they could settle in for sleep.

Marinette arranged herself comfortably and then motioned for Adrien to snuggle in, resting his head on her shoulder, an arm and a leg draped lightly across her.

Fifteen minutes later, just when Marinette was starting to doze off, Adrien spoke in a timid, quiet voice.

“Are you sure you don’t have any regrets about never dating anyone else?”

His vulnerable tone banished the fog of sleep.

“I’m sure,” she responded decidedly. “I don’t need to date anyone else because I wouldn’t be able to fully be myself with anyone but you. You really know me, both sides of me, the good and the bad, so you’re the only one I can truly be the real me with. You’re not trapping me, Adrien; you’re setting me free. You were always right about revealing our identities. Being able to be myself around you without the masks and the secrets and the lies keeps me sane. Knowing that my partner really gets it makes all the stress and the strain bearable…and I wouldn’t have that with anyone but you. Go to sleep, My Love. You’re stuck with me.”

“Okay,” he chuckled softly, leaning in for a gentle, reassuring kiss. “I’d be overjoyed to be stuck with you for many, many years to come.”

“Same,” she hummed happily, nuzzling his hair and running her hand up and down his back soothingly until they both drifted off to sleep.

The End

[milasartblog]

An unexpected visit (part 5)

Both Gabriel and Lilith took more time to collect their thoughts and put themselves together. Especially for archangel, whose views were once more broken, but this time almost instantly. He looked at Lilith again.

Gabriel: How did you...meet your human?

Lilith: Well, after no success with the relationship between me and Lucifer, and after several eons and years of ruling Hell, I felt a need of someone that could fill my life with simplicity and honesty. And so I went to a mortal realm. In one of my own houses, I was ordering a pizza and half an hour later, a pizza delivery guy came to my home. That was the day when I got interested in him and so, I kept an eye on him. I felt like he was not an ordinary pizza delivery guy. One day we became friends and for several weeks we were friends with benefits.

Gabriel: I thought that it’s more typical for mortals.

Lilith: Not really~ Anyways, I learned that his name is Jeff and that he had a...difficult relationship with his family. I would say even toxic one. I was watching over them from time to time as learned more and more about his family. They wanted to use him as a tool to get richer and more powerful, while he wanted to live a simple life. And so he left them and became a pizza delivery guy.

Gabriel: Damn, there are still toxic families in this world?

Lilith: Unfortunately, yes. But such choice gave him a chance to live as he wants and be independent from his family.

Gabriel: I see...And how did he guess that you were not a human?

Lilith: It didn’t take too long as my behavior was not like any ordinary woman. But like I said before, he didn’t run away or used his force against me. We had feelings to each other, and one day we had a chat, where I told him about me and he told me about himself. Since then we’re together, and our feelings stay true and strong.

Gabriel: I see....I’m honestly surprised. 

Lilith: That’s okay~ Also, why did you ask me about my human?

Gabriel: I honestly was curious how it happened with you and if it’s different from my situation.

Lilith: Well, if you tell me about your human like I did, we will see the difference~

Gabriel: Fair point. Well, it was honestly happened unexpectedly. I was searching for good flowers to give to Raphael’s wife Rachel as in their family daughter was born and me and Michael wanted to congratulate them. 

Lilith: Aww, that’s so sweet~

Gabriel: I know, right? But in Heaven we could easily pick any flower for it, and so I thought to go to the mortal realm and see if their flowers are different from Heaven. I walked around the town, but couldn’t find anything that would sparkle even my soul. Then, I bumped into one girl accidentally. She was carrying some flowers, and if not my quick reaction, they would fall. We apologized for such accident, but when I looked at her, something changed in me.

Lilith: Like butterflies in your stomach?~

Gabriel: Maybe. But it was something so strong that made me help her carrying flowers to the flower shop, where, I learnt later, she was working. When we got there, I looked around and saw a great variety of flowers. Moreover, as a thank you, she helped me with picking up good flowers for such occasions. Not just randomly picking flowers just to mix them, but with...little sense and symbolism in them. When I thanked her for the help, she told me her name - Iris.

Lilith: That’s a very beautiful name. No wonder you have a crush on her~

Gabriel: I’m still not sure if it’s really a crush. I was watching over her, we even have met each other several times. And later, we became friends.

Lilith: I see. And you still meet each other?

Gabriel: Yeah. And yet I still can’t find the answer to my feelings.

Lilith: No need to~ You know that you like her, that’s the fact~

Gabriel: Maybe yes, maybe no. What if it’s all just a lie. What if that meeting was just an accident.

Lilith: Then why do you keep being with her if it’s all just a lie to you?

Gabriel:....I don’t know anymore. 

He looks down, sighing heavily.

Gabriel: I don’t know what to believe now, Lilith...If our Father’s laws are not perfect, does it mean that we....are not perfect too? Does it mean that...mortals don’t need us? 

Lilith: Don’t say that, silly. If something is not perfect, it doesn’t mean we don’t need them at all. 

Gabriel:...You really think so?

Lilith: Of course I do~ Or else there would be a lot of mortals with demonic powers, or worse. 

Gabriel: Well, true, but our situation is more difficult. Unlike me, your human accepted your nature and your feelings. What if Iris doesn’t? What even if she accepts my nature...but won’t accept my feelings?

Lilith: You know how mortals tend to say: you never know until you try~

Gabriel: But-

Lilith: Love is such thing that can’t be explained by books or other stuff. It’s something we feel inside our bodies and souls. You’re just afraid to do a mistake, afraid to shame your title as an archangel. And yet, look at the progress you did. Such progress is already something, don’t you think?~ Besides, even we can do mistakes when we do something first time, even we learn something from them. Same here with love. Instead of pushing it away, you tried to understand it, and for the divinity it’s a great step through their pride~

She looked at Gabriel with little, but sincere smile. He didn’t like to admit, but her sister told the truth. A demon said the truth to angel, what an unexpected turn of event for him. The memories of the past crossed his mind, the moments where Lilith sometimes cheered up him like this, even tho he didn’t ask her to do it. He smiled a bit, which made Lilith be surprise for a moment, but quickly realized what he was thinking.

Lilith: Thinking of the past?

Gabriel: Huh? Oh, well...yeah. Just remembered how we used to have such chats like now. At that time the problems were not wide-scale, and yet you still wanted to help me when I was confused. I kinda felt bad that I was not skilled enough to do it by myself.

Lilith: No need to. I did it because I felt like doing it~ Besides, we were a family back then.

Gabriel: Yeah...Speaking of the past...

Lilith: Mmm?

Gabriel: Lily...are you...still mad at me? After....

Lilith: After the moment when me and Lucifer became demons?

Gabriel: Yeah, and...after everything we did.

He locked his look on Lilith’s eyes, not expecting anything from her. Lilith was puzzled for a moment, but then realized what he was talking about as giggled softly, which made Gabriel confused.

Lilith: You still think about it?~ Really?~

Gabriel: Well, I can’t help, you know how I always overthink about everything!

Lilith: Hehe, I know~ It’s one of your remarkable features~ Still, if you are curious about it, then no, I’m not~

Gabriel:....Wait, really?

Lilith: Yep~ After all, the past is the past~ It would be not wise of me to stay in the same point, don’t you think?~

Gabriel:...Fair point. But, are you sure? We did so much stuff that were against your and Lucifer’s ideas.

Lilith: And that’s natural. There is no perfect idea, point of view or opinion. That’s what makes us unique and different, but still unite us as a family.

Gabriel took a moment to think as sighed.

Gabriel: You’re right. The past is the past, we can’t come back to it. 

Lilith: Yep~ So, what did you decide for yourself? I mean about Iris.

Gabriel took a moment to think again, analyzing everything that was said in this conversation. He felt that his relationship will take a long time like with Lilith and Jeff, and yet, deep inside he knew that feelings can’t lie. He wants to know more about Iris, he wants to be more with Iris, he wants to protect her, to just hold her hands, be someone she can rely on. But it required serious, maybe even heavy decisions.

Gabriel: It’s still too early to make a clear decision, as I’m still obedient to our Father’s laws. However, I do admit that Iris is important to me. Besides we gave a promise to each other to be good friends, so as an archangel I have no right to break that promise. When the time comes, I will tell her everything...myself.

Lilith: That’s my brother~

She pat him on the shoulder as it made him jump a bit from the surprise. He smiled to Lilith.

Gabriel: But I still can’t tell my brothers about it as I want to be sure they understand me. And hope that they will respect my choice.

Lilith: Like you did with Lucifer?

Gabriel:....I still can’t stand the thought of him doing something to Michael, but as long as Michael is fine, I’m calm.

Lilith: Sure sure~ I know how you can be “calm”~

Gabriel: Hey! Not you too!

She laughed as Gabriel made an irritated face, crossing his arms, which made Lilith laugh more.

Lilith: No need to be an angry hamster, I’m just kidding~

Gabriel: Yeah yeah, sure. Anyways, I think I will go back to Heaven.

Lilith: Aww, already?~ And not staying even for five minutes more?~

Gabriel: Well, I still have some duties to do.

Lilith: Okay, but let me at least show you how Cerberus looks like. So that you won’t have crazy thoughts~

Gabriel got nervous immediately as swallowed hard, already imagining how Cerberus looks like.

Gabriel: Ummm, I think I will live somehow without-

Lilith: Don’t be that stubborn, it’s only one chance to do it while Lucifer is not here~ Come on, let’s go~

He was about to say no, but Lilith grabbed his hand and together they went to the place where Cerberus was resting and chilling. Gabriel got super nervous as prayed that things don’t go too crazy.

-------------------

And that's the next part of the story^^ Gabriel made a not easy decision, but seems like it will take much more time for him to get used to it and to find his inner peace XD Also, how will the meeting with Cerberus go? XD

Lilith belongs to @wildstarfan and @captainthane

Gabriel belongs to @wildstarfan and @milasartblog (both me)

Okaria et Feria belongs to @wildstarfan and @captainthane

[heavy-lobster]

POST THE FUCKING ESSAY KOAL/DUSTY I SWEAR TO GOD

WAIT I THOUGHT YOU READ IT ALREADY??? DID I SERIOUSLY NOT SEND IT TO YOU WHEN I INITIALLY FINISHED IT??? GOD WHAT THE FUCK

Well I can’t NOT post it now.

So for some background, the assignment was to write a short essay arguing as to why a children’s series of our choosing could be classified as horror, based on some article we had to read. I chose Wow Wow Wubbzy because I thought it would be funny and. man. So anyways this is VERY poorly written because I did most of it between like,,, midnight and 3 am. It’s very ranty and way longer than it needed to be. For ease of reading I went back and fixed up the shitty formatting and fixed a few spelling errors, as well as linking my sources.

So uhhh this is about horror so,, warning for horror ig?? It’s not scary like, at all, but better safe than sorry.

Wow! Wow! Wubbzy!: The Horror Within

Introduction

“Wow! Wow! Wubbzy!” is an American TV show originally aired on Nick Jr. From the mind of Bob Boyle, this educational kid’s show was very memorable for a lot of kids growing up at that time. The show features Wubbzy, a yellow, square, animalistic character, with a curly, “springy” tail; as well as Wubbzy’s various friends. Most episodes feature Wubbzy and his pals, Widget and Walden (as well as Daizy in later episodes), dealing with an every day situation, or well, depends on your definition of “every day”. The situation spirals out of control because of the actions of various characters, and it is resolved by the problematic character of the episode learning a lesson and fixing their mistake. Seems like a typical kids show, right? Well, there may be more to it than that. What if I told you that Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! could be interrupted as a horror show about horrifically mutated beasts struggling to survive the post apocalyptic world they are forced to inhabit? Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! fits many categories described in Sharon A. Russell’s literary criticism in “What is the Horror Genre?”. In this essay we will discuss how Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! could possibly be classified as a horror series.  

Asking the real questions; what is everyone?

First of all, a very important question. What exactly are the characters? There are claims that Wubbzy himself is some kind of gerbil, but frankly I don’t see it. Also, what’s the deal with the inhabitants of Wuzzleburg in general? Wubbzy and his friends are supposed to be anthropomorphic animals, but they seem more like horrific monsters, mutated from normal animals. Monsters are a very common and important element in horror. Not all monsters are vicious killers, and not all of them are obvious in appearance. Some monsters are small and cute, but it’s almost always a facade. 

There are also some “regular” animals running around, but yet they aren’t “normal” by any stretch of the imagination. Some are very obviously not normal, others seem mostly normal. “Flutterflies” are a common, non-anthro animal seen in Wubbzy, with their most prominent appearance being in the episode “The Flight of the Flutterfly”. Flutterflies seem like normal butterflies, but why are they called “Flutterflies” instead? Are they in any way different to the butterflies of our world, or is that just what the inhabitants of Wuzzleburg call butterflies? What about the more blatantly odd non-anthro animals? In “Attack of the 50 Foot Fleegle” Wubbzy acquires a pet “Fleegle”. It appears to be a small, purple, almost hamster like creature. It remains small and happy if you feed it the right kind of food, but Wubbzy foolishly feeds it candy and sweets. When fed candy, the Fleegle increases in size in increasingly large increments. After a time, it becomes so big that it rampages all over Wuzzleburg. The only thing that could shrink it back to normal size was carrot juice. When fed bologna, they multiply, and the solution to this is unknown, as the episode ends there and this is never brought up again. 

There are plenty of strange animals, both anthropomorphic and not; yet no humans. Not a single human character in sight. This begs the question, what happened? Why are all these animals how they are? What happened to the humans? Obviously, these questions were never answered, as this is a kids show. Here is a thought to consider: what if all the humans are dead, and all the characters are mutant abominations, or, monsters as they’d more fittingly be called. Humans have been wiped out, and the animals who survived mutated in many different ways. Some animals became intelligent, and capable of building their own society similar to what once was our own. That society is what we know as Wuzzleburg. In conclusion, all the creatures seen in the show are the result of something terrible; mutated abominations passing as animals. This fits the “monster” category of horror as described in Russell’s article.

What’s the deal with Wuzzleburg?

Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! takes place in the fictional town of Wuzzleburg. Wuzzleburg and its surrounding locations look very odd. Everything is unnaturally geometric. Everything- from houses to trees- is very odd in appearance. Tree branches are often bendy, always at a right angle, with the edges being smooth and rounded. In Wuzzleburg, many houses look like completely normal houses, yet Wubbzy lives in a tree house. Another common thing is that houses and buildings of importance are usually designed based on a specific object. Daizy’s house, for example, is shaped like a flower. 

Outside of Wuzzleburg, the locations only get weirder. There is an island, shown to be somewhere off the coast of Wuzzleburg, called “Dino Island”. As the name suggests, this island is inhabited by dinosaurs. So apparently, dinosaurs are not extinct in this universe; at least on this island. As far as other towns go, there is Wuzzlewood, clearly based on Hollywood, where all the biggest celebrities in the Wubbzy cinematic universe (WCU) live. Everything in Wuzzlewood is covered in stars, a clever spin of the celebrity theme. Another interesting location is Plaidville. In Plaidville, everything is plaid; the trees, the ground, and even the inhabitants. I don’t have to explain what is unnatural about that. 

Now, back on the topic of Wuzzleburg, since it is the main location seen in the show, and is where Wubbzy and his friends live. It has been stated that Wuzzleburg was founded in 1853 by “Heinrich van Wuzzle”. The specific year being given is an odd detail, that you wouldn’t normally expect in a show of this nature. Wuzzleburg is clearly a town in every sense of the word. It has plenty of stores and restaurants, an airport, houses, residents, a mayor, a rich history, annual festivities, reliable transportation, schools, and even a stable economy. All of this being made by what we have already established as horrific monsters. That’s impressive. There is common debate in the Wubbzy fandom on whether these locations are in a parallel universe, or perhaps if they exist on our Earth. In the episode “Fly Us To The Moon”, the place where they land back on “Earth” appears to suggest that Wuzzleburg is located somewhere in or near Washington state, in America, or possibly somewhere in British Columbia. 

My theory is that the events of Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! takes place on Earth, but certainly not our Earth. An alternate Earth, where humans may have lived before. Some horrible nuclear accident wiped out all human life, and caused all the animals to mutate into the many strange creatures of the WCU. This also explains the unnatural features of the setting. Post-apocalyptic Earth? Sounds like a perfect horror setting to me. This fits perfectly with the criteria described in Sharon’s article.

The beast within; Wubbzy’s true villain

Finally, the matter of the deep internal conflict hidden deep within the show. In the show, you can expect every episode to have a lesson or moral, as many kids shows do. Most episodes feature one of the main characters (almost always Wubbzy) making a mistake, followed by them learning the lesson of the episode and using their newfound knowledge to make things right. What if I told you that this is sign of a much deeper internal conflict going on far beneath the character’s cute exterior? Would it be so far fetched to believe that every episode is focused on the anthropomorphic abominations struggling to fight against their beastly instincts? Their own organized and civilized society goes against their very nature, and they constantly fight to uphold the standards they set; both for themselves, and each other. It's a constantly uphill climb. Wubbzy is undeniably a flawed character. He messes up constantly, often learning the same lessons over and over again, as if it’s more of a reminder than a lesson. It’s Wubbzy against himself. This fits Sharon’s criteria of internal horror, but that’s not all. 

Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! is also the story of a quest for self improvement, as well as a good vs evil scenario, which are two of Russell’s other criteria. I mean, think about it. Every character is open to self improvement once they realize the harm they’ve caused. Every character is on their own quest, seeking to better themselves. Every character is going through their own internal battle. They fight their own flaws. Their own evils. The true villain of Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! is the evil within all of them, the beastly instincts lurking within all of Wuzzleberg’s monster inhabitants. And they may not always be perfect, maybe they don’t know how to be “good”, maybe being good just isn’t in their nature; but they try their best despite all the challenges, to be better, and improve themselves. 

In that way I think we can all relate to them. We aren’t always “good”, we aren’t perfect, sometimes we don’t know how to do the “right” thing, but our flaws are what make us human. It may not be in our nature to be flawless, but it is in our nature to seek self improvement, and that’s what Wubbzy is really about. The struggles we all go through to be better people, because inside? We’re all just monsters trying our best to be civil, and conform to our moral code. And really? That’s enough. 

Conclusion 

Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! is undeniably a kid’s show at heart, but if you really stop to analyze it, you find a much darker horror series. It would be fittingly classified as a psychological horror. It fits almost all of Sharon A. Russell’s criteria as described in the article “What is the Horror Genre?”. What is Wubbzy? In fact, what are all of the show’s characters? Their vaguely animal appearance appeal to young children, but I believe that they may actually be normal animals mutated into horrible monsters. Freaks of nature created by a nuclear incident. There is not a single human seen in the show, but plenty of abnormal creatures. This suggests that we are long gone. The monsters we left behind built their own society.

 Not only were the animals affected, but also the earth itself. The odd nature of the setting supports my nuclear devastation theory. Finally, is the true conflict of Wubbzy. The show itself is about nuclear monsters trying their best to adapt to the society they built for themselves, even if it goes against their own nature. It’s beasts on a quest where the only objective is the betterment of the self. An internal conflict. There is no physical villain in the show. The only antagonist out to get Wubbzy, is Wubbzy himself. In that way, I think we can all relate. In conclusion, Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! is actually about horribly mutated animals fighting their inner demons, on a metaphorical journey to be better than they are. For that very reason, I believe it could be interrupted as a horror series. 

Sources: 

Wubbzy Wikipedia page

Wubbzy Fandom Wiki, which I did NOT know existed before this project and honestly the comments on the page were the funniest fucking thing, I highly recommend it

And uhhh various episodes of Wubbzy I had to watch

I apologize for my crimes

[fifteenleads]

A YOI x Chrono Trigger AU fic from Ye Olde 2018-ish Era. Go figure.

I can’t even remember what the hell I titled this before. Welp.

.

Chapter One: “That’s a Nice Band-Aid, Darling.”

.

They say that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, and that a hero's adventure begins with a cliché-ass wake-up call - something like, "Good morning, Crono!," perhaps. How that even made it on to TV Tropes, Yuuri would never understand. But it is on TV Tropes, and he is in bed reading it.

He's glad his mother doesn't wake him up that way, at least. But then again, he's always up before five a.m. anyway. Sadly, the daily deliveries won't take care of themselves.

Yuuri glances at the time on his tablet. 4:59. Someone will come knocking in three, two, one --

"Yuuri! Get up!" Mari's voice is accompanied by three sharp raps on the door. "Go with dad to the plaza and help him set up!"

This is the part where the hero typically groans at being woken up before grudgingly getting themselves out of bed, but Yuuri Katsuki does not groan. He shouts back that he'll be down in a minute while looking for that darned sock that has gone missing now, of all times. Phichit would surely laugh hard at seeing his best friend hopping frantically on one foot while wearing a poodle-patterned sock. It'll probably go viral on Instagram, too, but that's pretty much a given already. Someone has to part the boy from his gadgets long-term after the Millenial Fair is over.

The minute is up, so Yuuri gives up and gets another sock from the drawer. It is patterned with the face of a silver-haired man surrounded by snowflakes. He has no idea how that found its way into his pile of clothing, but for now, mismatched socks are better than being late.

Yuuri makes his way downstairs and greets his mother, who is busy in the kitchen. Hiroko sends him off with an allowance of fifty kin and packed lunch for him and his father. He ignores Mari's snickering as she musses his hair while glancing at his feet.

The ride to the plaza is pretty short. It is already bustling with people even at such an early hour, all the sellers trying to outdo each other in showing off their wares. Yuuri chuckles as his father joins in the fray, calling out to everyone about the best katsudon in town. Everyone is excited for Hasetsu Kingdom's first Millenial Fair, and with it, the hopes for a thousand years more of peace and prosperity to come.

Toshiya leads the way to their assigned spot, a quaint little corner by the northern area of the square. The tent had already been set up the day before, so all that's left to do is to arrange the food and drinks before the first customers come in. Yuuri passively observes the hustle and bustle around them. Much energy is palpable in the air, and the excited hubbub only grows louder as the sun rises. Some stalls have weapons and armor, others exotic trinkets and accessories. He even spots a merchant selling animals. Phichit would probably want to pick up a new hamster on the way home later.

His eyes wander to the secluded area beyond the main square. Yuuri hoped Phichit's solo exhibit would be a success this time, too. His friend loved tinkering with machines since he was little, and it brought him and his family great fortune as he won scientific contests left and right. His magnum opus, a two-machine teleporter, had impressed the university professors and the panel of judges alike, earning him the highest thesis grade and the first prize for the National Physics Summit.

Yuuri's hand stills when his father calls his name. He had been adding portions of garnish to the newly-cut fried pork cutlets. He instinctively opens his mouth to apologize, but Toshiya immediately pats his back and pushes a one hundred-kin note into his hand. "I'll take care of the stall. You go have fun." He winks at his son mischievously, and Yuuri pushes down the growing blush creeping onto his cheeks.

"Th-Thanks, dad," he mumbles, bowing slightly before making his way to the northernmost part of the square. Phichit would probably be busy right now, but he would never refuse breakfast and morning coffee. It had been their time-honored tradition as college roommates, after all.

Yuuri stops by a mobile café and orders two tall hazelnut lattés and a baguette loaf. He is turning to leave with breakfast in hand when he bumps into the next person in line, spilling hot coffee over his white shirt. The other person, too, recoils in pain, reflexively putting a slender finger into his mouth to nurse it.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so, so sorry!" Yuuri exclaims, setting aside the food and drink and beginning to fuss over the man. He searches his bag for the small bottle of salve he always brings with him, and proceeds to apply a small amount over the man's injured finger, covering it with a band-aid afterwards.

The other man chuckles as he lets Yuuri take care of him. "It's quite all right," he assures airily, waving the bandaged hand with a smile. "I was also too close to you in line, as well." His blue eyes crinkle beautifully as he smiles, and Yuuri fights yet another blush from coloring his face. "I love this band-aid, though!" the man comments. "Where did you get it?"

"F-From the kids' section of the pharmacy," Yuuri admits, embarrassed. He just had to use that one by mistake instead of the flesh-tones ones, did he? Why now, of all times? "The poodle-patterned ones were part of a limited edition series."

"Nice!" the man exclaims in delight, scrutinizing the design closely. "Thank you so much for giving me this one. I love it!" He winks at Yuuri and places a light kiss over his own bandaged finger.

Yuuri wishes the ground would swallow him whole right this instant.

"U-Um, I think I'll get going now," he excuses himself, retrieving the coffee and bread from the counter. "My friend is waiting uphill. I'm so sorry again." Yuuri quickly nods his head and goes on his way, but the other man takes a long stride and ends up beside him, taking the baguette loaf out of his arms.

"It's okay, I'll help you," he offers happily as they ascend the stone steps. "I'm alone today, anyway." The man cradles the food with his left arm and extends his right hand out to Yuuri. "I'm Binktop, by the way. What's your name?"

For an instant, Yuuri is tempted to laugh out loud. The funny name hardly matches the man's regal appearance at all. He must be a foreigner, like the many others who have come to Hasetsu Kingom to join in the festivities. As a citizen of Hasetsu, therefore, he is to show this man the utmost respect and hospitality he deserves, funny names or not.

He shakes Binktop's hand, the cool skin sending small shivers down his spine. "I'm Yuuri. It's nice to meet you, Binktop."

"A pleasure." Binktop returns the handshake with a smile, and they continue going up the stairs. "So, Yuuri, are you also alone here today?"

"Our family actually has a food stall down at the main square, but my dad told me to enjoy myself today," Yuuri explains. "I'm on my way to see my friend, actually. He's an inventor."

Binktop's eyes widen and sparkle in delight, and he accidentally climbs two steps at once. "Wow! He must be really smart!"

"He is," Yuuri nods fondly in agreement. "Phichit has a solo exhibit today. This project won him first place at the National Physics Summit last month."

"That's amazing!" Binktop gushes in admiration, his silver bangs parting to reveal twinkling blue eyes. "I can't wait to meet him!" Yuuri smiles back proudly in response.

They reach the top of the stairs in a minute. The miniature square is cluttered with various machine parts and wires of different lengths and calibers. The two main pods have already been set in their positions, though not yet fully-assembled as Yuuri remembers them. It's definitely like Phichit to cram at the last minute.

The soft whirring noise dies down as the two approach the left pod, and a brown-skinned young man in a bandanna and overalls comes out to greet them. "Yuuri! You're here!"

Yuuri shrugs good-naturedly and hands Phichit the cup of coffee. "I'd love to hug you, but you're covered in oil and soot right now." He smiles widely at his best friend. "Good luck with your exhibit today!"

"Oh my gosh, thank you so much! You don't know how much I need it!" Phichit downs the coffee in an instant, breathing rapidly through his mouth afterwards to cool his tongue. "I heard the prince is coming with the royal delegation to watch my demonstration! I am so nervous!"

This time, Yuuri pats Phichit's shoulder encouragingly, not minding his hand blackening with soot afterwards. "You'll do well, Phichit! You've done this before; you can do it again."

"Good luck, Phichit!" Binktop adds, sending a friendly wink and a thumbs-up of his own. Phichit is surprised at the additional voice, and notices the other man for the first time. His nervous expression immediately changes to one of teasing, instantly directed at his friend. "Yuuri!" he whispers loudly. "Who's the hot guy?!"

"H-He's not - I mean -" Yuuri splutters, coughing into his hand to stop himself. He doesn't even bother hiding his obviously-reddened cheeks anymore; nothing ever escapes Phichit's notice, anyway. Tonight's phone call is going to be a long one.

When Yuuri has composed himself, he turns to Binktop. "Phichit, this is Binktop. I ran into him in the square today. Binktop, this is my friend, Phichit."

"Hi there!" Phichit merrily extends a hand to Binktop. "Phichit Chulanont, at your service!"

"Binktop," he introduces himself, shaking Phichit's hand. "Yuuri here has told me a lot about you."

"Hahaha, good things, I hope!" Phichit laughs, before shooting Yuuri an expectant glare. Yuuri grins back before taking another sip of coffee.

Phichit shows them around the workplace, pointing out the different parts of the invention and which part goes where. His black eyes shine brightly as he rambles in tech jargon while explaining the principle behind the teleporter. Binktop nods excitedly while asking questions, while Yuuri merely watches them interact. Despite his "nerdy glasses," as Phichit had christened them, he is not really into scientific stuff, having taken up a sports major in university.

"Sure thing! I was about to give this thing a test run, anyway." Phichit beckons Yuuri to come over. "Yuuri! Could you kindly step on the left pod? Binktop wants a demonstration."

Yuuri opens his mouth to protest, but knows better than to interrupt his friend when he is in scientist-mode. He may have also wanted to impress Binktop with his bravery, but he doesn't know it yet. Huffing, he finishes the rest of his coffee in one gulp and does as he is told.

Phichit flips the switch, and Yuuri almost loses his footing as he feels himself being sucked away into a vacuum space. Black, wavy lines fill his vision for a moment before everything around him returns to normal. He steps off the right pod and flashes the peace sign at Phichit and Binktop from across the square.

Binktop immediately makes a beeline for Yuuri and embraces him tightly, while Phichit pumps his fist in joy. "Wow, amazing!" he exclaims as he cups Yuuri's face. "You actually teleported!"

"That's how it's supposed to work," Yuuri answers matter-of-factly, but even he has an undeniably huge smile on his face. Phichit's exhibit is surely going to be a massive hit amongst the fair-goers.

"Can I give it a try, too?" Binktop asks Phichit excitedly, still not letting go of Yuuri. "It looks like so much fun!"

"Of course, Binktop!" Phichit laughs, gesturing at the left pod. "Anything for Yuuri's friend!"

Binktop lets out a whoop and disentangles himself from Yuuri. He lightly steps onto the left pod and runs a hand throuh his silver hair. "Watch me, Yuuri!" He sends a playful wink in Yuuri's direction before nodding at Phichit.

"All right, let's do this!" Phichit flips the switch again. Nothing happens at first, so he turns the machine off and on while observing the monitors. Worry begins to creep into his expression as he starts fiddling with the controls, but still, nothing happens.

A gasp from the left pod directs their attention to Binktop, whose pendant is glowing brightly from inside his shirt. It seems to be resonating with the core machine of the teleporter, from which ominous sparks begin to fly out. Phichit shouts at Binktop to get off the pod immediately, but Binktop hears it too late.

A large wormhole, unlike the one Yuuri had seen briefly while he teleported, opens up in the space behind Binktop and appears to be sucking him in. Trying his best to hold his ground, Binktop cries out for help as he extends his hand. In a panic, Yuuri runs up to the left pod and tries to grab him, but his whole body disappears in a flash of light, and the wormhole closes in an instant. Yuuri is left alone on the pod, Binktop's golden pendant in his hand.

Phichit is the first to regain his voice after a few minutes. "What the hell... This wasn't supposed to happen..." Yuuri turns to his friend, who is kneeling by the controllers in shock. Long tracks of tears have washed away the layers of soot on his face.

He runs down to embrace Phichit, who is now trembling in his friend's arms. "Yuuri, I'm so sorry! I really didn't mean for this to happen!"

Yuuri runs his hands over his friend's back, ignoring his own swimming vision and the violent hammering of his own heart in his chest. Now is not the time to deal with an impending anxiety attack - not when Phichit needs his help.

"Phichit. Look at me," he instructs calmly. "Breathe with me."

Together, they go through the motions, inhaling and exhaling deeply in unison. Most of the time, it was Phichit who did this for Yuuri when they were still in college together. It always helped calm Yuuri down after an attack, and Yuuri is more than glad to return the favor now. They cannot afford to be too calm, however - they still have to find out where the hell Binktop went.

Some day this is turning out to be. Yuuri swears never to get up before five a.m. ever again.

Phichit looks up at him and nods determinedly. Yuuri lets go of his friend as he begins to go over his notes. "Either the telepod malfunctioned, or something else did it," he thinks aloud to the clearing at large. "I'm suspecting your friend's pendant had an unusual reaction with the core interface, causing a ripple in the space-time fabric or something."

Yuuri gapes at Phichit incredulously. "You mean, like, time travel?!"

"I don't know yet." Phichit bites his lower lip in deep thought. "That wormhole could have led anywhere. It's too dangerous to try anything at this point."

"We have to bring Binktop back, Phichit! There's no time!"

"I know that!" Phichit snaps, rubbing a blackened hand on his temple at the sudden outburst. "It's not as easy as it seems. We have to find out how to open that wormhole, for starters. There must be something about that pendant."

Yuuri lifts the pendant in his hand against the daylight. It is a small, round, golden medallion with intricate rose patterns bordering its circumference, hanging from a simple chain. The pendant also seems to be pretty old but well-maintained. He briefly wonders where Binktop must have gotten such a valuable trinket and how much it must have cost, but pushes these thoughts out of his mind.

A tiny spark jumps out of the medallion, causing Yuuri to drop the pendant onto the left pod in surprise. Immediately, it causes another reaction, violent gusts of wind forming around them as the wormhole opens once more.

"Well," Phichit laughs brokenly, "that was easy enough!" With a hand shielding his face, he struggles to walk against the wind's direction and tries to pick up the pendant off the ground.

Yuuri has other ideas, however. He uses his stronger body to his advantage and overtakes Phichit in a second, picking up the pendant and wearing it around his neck.

"Yuuri! What are you doing?!" Phichit shouts in alarm. "Get off the pod now!"

To be honest, he has no idea what he is doing, either. His body is already protesting his sudden decision, his heart rate going up, his breathing more rapid, and his hands slippery with sweat. But above all, Yuuri feels that it's the right decision. It's more reckless than heroic, by all means, but nevertheless the right one, just the same.

"I'll bring Binktop back!" he shouts at his friend. "I'll get us back home, I promise!"

Again with the stupid promises, but Phichit seems to finally support his decision. He nods determinedly and hands Yuuri a long, steel wrench. "It's my favorite one! Bring it back safely, okay?"

"Thanks, Phichit! I will." Yuuri waves the wrench nervously as he steps into the closing wormhole.

"Be careful, Yuuri!" Phichit shouts after him. "I'll try to follow you as soon as I figure things out!"

A chuckle escapes Yuuri's lips. It's just like his friend to jump at the call. If anyone is more suited to be the hero of this story, it would definitely be Phichit, and Yuuri, as the dutiful friend, would support him all the way. Funny how things have turned out the other way around this time.

For now, he, Yuuri Katsuki, will be the hero of this story, and he swears on his life to bring Binktop back.

Yuuri raises a thumbs-up to the fading image of his friend, not caring if he doesn't see it. He lets the distortion fill his senses completely until the black nothingness consumes him and claims his consciousness.

[critical-ramblings]

Things that Mean More on a second watch-through of C2

Episode 8-10

"He burned alive in front of me" "Yeah you did that though" this is why I love Beau

Caleb identifying all the things and then not telling them what it is makes a first appearance! It's so clear here how little he trusts them, even as he jokes with Beau 'you look like a nerd' and Fjord 'yeah those manacles just stop you from being gassy"

Fjord snaps Beau's goggles almost immediately upon her acquiring them. so what I'm saying is that they've always had that sibling energy

Caleb purposefully manipulates Jester by giving her the wand--to distract her from the glove of blasting...too bad Beau is on the case.

Beau says she's getting her own room, and Jester says they've always been roommates...this is also the night Beau tucks her in, so....THIS IS IN EPISODE 8 PEOPLE

Jester extorting the starosta for Fjord's letter is still Incredible, as is the first appearance of "Fjord Tough." I still lost it with the rest of the table.

Caleb didn't have to roll a wisdom save after he incinerated the bandit leader because he was immediately knocked unconscious, but Liam makes up for it with the nightmare he has afterward (take them out, take them out!) LOVE ME SOME ANGSTY WIZARD

I already made a post about this, but I feel compelled to remind everyone that the shady guide they meet when they first get to Zadash is the abandoned business partner of Lawrence, Tary's husband. 

First appearance of Pumat Sol! I love how much the cast love's Matt's voices

"Unpleasant one, let's go" "obnoxious one, I'm with ya" Molly and Beau are so good you guys

"There are those who believe [tieflings] are the result of the Curse of Ghor Dranas" cool world-building Matt!

"The Apple Tree Learning Center" is a soltryce-run 'public school' for children and adults...who wants to bet it was a similar school that discovered the blumentrio? Or at least encouraged them to apply

the first time Caleb transcribed a spell (unseen servant) he IMMEDIATELY invited Nott to help him. And Nott, though dismayed that it was going to take 2 hours, was willing to help out.

"What are you doing with my cat?" Molly won't be able to see through Frumpkin's eyes, but he's got the spirit

"When you compliment people it sounds like a fucking insult," Fjord and Beau are GREAT

Maye one reason we have a dim view of the Empire is because our first plot line in Zadash involved corrupt politicians...not to mention Caleb's whole Thing

First mention of the Cerberus Assembly: general complaints that they're grabbing for power and influence in Zadash and beyond.

Nott being afraid of the bath :( "a person could drown in that"

I legitimately forgot how much they treated Nott like a kid...from the swimming lesson, 'you'll get a sticker'

Caleb is SUPER paranoid, asking everyone how they feel about the Empire and sounding out these new party members. Funnily enough, it's Molly who is most on his wavelength as far as keeping a low profile goes

Yasha really didn't want to confess which god she followed to the rest of the Nein, but when pressed said, "he pulled me out of what felt like literally the depths of hell. I owe him my life." this is without even remembering Obann or what he did.

The contrast between early Beau/Yasha 'do I get a good view" 'roll for perv' and later Softness is...a lot

Caleb and Yasha bond over not doing the hugging thing

Nott LEANS AWAY after asking how dangerous the sewer job is going to be. She is Not On Board for risking her life the way the others are--not even for 700 gold.

'you kicked his cat into oblivion!' "I didn't!" Matt doesn't often distance himself from his NPCs, but when he does it's for animal cruelty and bad parenting.

Jester talking about her visit with the Traveler in the Pillow Trove is...Relevant. It's kind of crazy how early the line was drawn between Fjord and Beau not trusting him and Caleb being quick to prop up Jester's faith, "there are stories that tell of gods dabbling with mortals, not often but it does happen." whereas Beau says, "I'm interested in a god who kicks it with mortals. Never heard of that."

Caleb not wanting to get a new jacket because he knows this one is big autism feels (even if it is also his paranoia talking)

"she does see hamster unicorns. they're gods, right?" "No Beau they're just--they're just unicorns" I love them

"I've never been in a sewer" Molly says, excitedly, and also making me Feel Things

the evolution of Yasha's voice is really cute. we stan 1 Ashley Johnson

I think I was still listening to the podcast at this point so I totally missed all of the It jokes Liam did in the sewer job

Nott sees everyone getting ready to fight and takes a drink. It is interesting to keep track of her drinking, knowing everything we know now.

rat punching, the pasttime of lvl 3 adventurers.

Yasha, to Caleb: "are you very scared right now"

Caleb: "no because I am with all of you"

Nott: "I'm very scared right now"

Caleb advocating for looting the guards the spider killed is #vultureculture

It gets overlooked in later episodes, but 10 was when Nott's button collecting really took off.

They meet the Zadash Lawmaster Orentha and Nott immediately says, "she seems nice. I wonder why all those people wanted to rebel against her." if that doesn't sum up the themes of this campaign idk what does

Nott says, "and now we never have to do another adventure again" she's come so far

Caleb is VERY transactional after this fight, handing out loot for favors and goodwill with individual party members rather than splitting the loot.

This leads directly to Molly pinning him to the wall, which in retrospect was definitely a play for authority and dominance and not anything shippy.

Caleb straight up says to Fjord, "I don't trust you yet. I don't trust any of these people yet."

That whole conversation is actually Very Good: 

Fjord: "That's too bad"

Caleb: "yeah I have...I have made mistakes in my life. And, I'm, I have harmed people. Not in a long time. *clears throat* you know I thought I was going to be something, someday, a long time ago, and now I. Don't."

"We've all harmed people, and I hope you come to trust me in time" this is why I ship widofjord (emphasis mine)

 Nott going through Fjord's stuff is also this episode! Such shady motherfuckers

"If the money's right and it's not stupid" is a good philosophy for this group

"Your cat got kicked into another dimension?!" "Oh he had such a face, I will never forget this face"

They have fireflies in Kamordah and not Nicodranas. Canon.