#ethan hawke is so hot help me

[belovedeg]

Gonna enter my unhinged era and start writing slasher × reader fics and no one can stop me.

[star-dust-stuf]

Ethan Hawke x period!reader

title: I’m taking with the notion

warnings: descriptions of blood, cramps, nausea, and nudity (not sexual)

a/n: thought I’d write this cause I can’t find anything with him and this subject, also thought I’d write a little on endometriosis because I know exactly how you feel girlies, not proofread ignore typos, as always with love.

-

It was a late morning, Ethan was already up downstairs making his coffee, I can smell it hinting up the steps as I got up. My stomach was hurting and my back hurt, I thought if I took a nice hot shower it’ll go away, but little did I know it was something completely different.

As I got in and washed off, my body relaxed in the steamy room Ethan came into the room, a mug in his hand, when he was going to get into the bed I called his name. “Ethan?!”

He sat his mug on his desk and got to the bathroom, he opened the door. When the steam hit his face I was in far to much pain to stand straight even to get out of the shower. “Yeah?” Ethan replied, he sounded a little worried when I called him with a shaky voice.

“I cant get out-.”

“What?” He got to the curtain, peaking in, he saw me hunched over, not able to tell if I was crying or if it was just the water.

“What’s wrong, baby?” He opened the curtains enough to put his hands under my forearms, I placed mine on top, with support he made sure I didn’t get out of my position. “Step over, there you go.”

He grabbed my towel but before he could put it around me, a red color formed a stream down my leg and to the floor, with embarrassment I covered my eyes. “It’s ok, it’s ok!” He saw my embarrassment.

He wrapped the towel around me, “sweetheart, don’t be embarrassed it’s ok!” He laughed a little. I uncovered my eyes. “Things happen, it’s ok!”

His blue eyes were on me so softly, “i know- I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he said, he grabbed pulled my wet body to his chest, my wet hair dripping on his bare feet.

“Let’s get you dressed and I’ll help you lay down.” He helped me get dressed and helped me to the bed but he stopped, letting lean on his desk.

“What?” I drew attention when he got to my side of the bed and began stripping the bed. “What is it?”

“You- had an accident- it’s alright!” He said as he saw me stress, “just relax, it got this!”

When he went around to kiss my forehead he grabbed his mug, “have some coffee and just relax for a minute, ok baby?” He kissed my forehead again and walked down to the hall closet.

When he came back he made the bed and made sure I got comfortable, getting my heating pad and getting me painkillers. “Thank you.”

He kissed my cheek and went downstairs, I didn’t know what he was doing but I didn’t ask. When he came back he brought back my favorite snack. When the day progressed and Ethan was up and down in bed there was a point when he came back into the room to find my body constructed with pain, my body was lied down over my knees and my temples were wet with tears.

“Oh no- come here!” He said in a worried voice. He got to my softly, laying next to me he turned me over softly and wrapped his arms around me, his warm breath down my neck helped me calm down.

“Just take deep breaths,” he said over my crying.

I let m’y deep breaths out with shakes, he heard this. “Oh darling-.” He put his hands I’ve my sore stomach, rubbing it softly.

“Ow…” I whispered.

“It’s ok, just keep breathing,” he said kindly. With a slight discomfort in my legs I pushed them up, he saw I was in excruciating pain, he grabbed my knees and kept them up.

“They’re aching so bad!” I said.

He got up from me, he made it to my legs and began to message them, progressing pressure to make sure it was ok with me. “That ok?” He asked.

I nodded, my face still written with pain. Sadness formed on his face as he saw me suffer. “Baby, I wish I could do something.”

I smiled weakly, “you being here is enough.”

I then propped up, my chest feeling full and and a slight nausea hitting me, it was only getting worse! Ethan saw me struggle and did not hesitate to help me in any way possible.

“Lean on me,” he pulled me over softly and let me lay between his legs, his hands under my waistband keeping me calm he then paved the heating pad on my legs.

With every deep breath of nausea I was trying to fight off he stroked my hair. “Take slow sips,” he held a glass of water to my lips.

When my body settled on his, I fell asleep, he gazed down at me, his soft gaze made me feel safe, he kept on helping my constant pain when I began to be uncomfortable as I tried to sleep.

[mariamariquinha]

I was away (I'm still away), but I waited probably a whole month to wait until everyone around my 'tumblr circle' to watch it so I wouldn't kill the vibe or something.

It consumed me for weeks. WEEKS. Because I will start this small rambling (before disappearing again) with just one gif:

I remember exactly how it happened for me when I saw Pedro for the first time in Kingsman and I was like 'eh let's see his work'. I honestly don't know if it happened with Javier, when I started to really take a good look at his work he wasn't on The Mandalorian yet, nor any other blockbuster except for GOT (which I didn't watch and I don't plan on do so), but there was this sense of magnetism towards his acting that made me pay attention.

This moment right here, when Silva have dinner with Jake - this was the moment I fell in love with Pedro Pascal. If I was Ethan Hawke and there would be a MAN (because HE IS A MAN) like Pedro Pascal looking at me LIKE THAT, ACTING LIKE THAT, I would put it on the list of one of the best feelings I ever had in my life. Pedro got me by the neck. This whole story, to be honest, got me by the neck (and Ethan was brilliant as well), but Pedro gave me that type of sensation that I never knew I would be able to feel as an espectator: truly appreciation. Captivation.

Almodóvar did something here. He looked at Pedro and said: you are Silva. And Pedro IS Silva. We love Silva. He's passionate, intense, determined, full of hot blood inside his body and he takes and takes and takes and takes. He loves. He's obsessed. He's all teeth and fangs. He waited for too long. He wants and he wants now.

He gave me a taste in TLOU. In EFDV, he gave me the full experience.

And God help me but I'm here for it.

[taughtdefense]

you’re in the middle of your kitchen, eyes flickering between your phone as texts from your friends pour in & the still-too-hot mug of hot chocolate you just made for yourself, steam still rising from the cup. halloween as a concept has always eluded you. because you’re the third ever being in every existence, your idea of scary & the supernatural is vastly different from theirs.

another buzz pulls you back, & you see harlow’s message: you can’t skip halloween! it’s just one night, ethan! the group chat lights up with various costume plans & where to meet for trick-or-treating. chase has already chosen his outfit, & seth’s going as an obscure character only he would know. whatever the hell that means. you sigh, setting your phone down.

humans & their traditions never fail to confuse you.

“papa?” a small voice interrupts your thoughts. you turn to find henry, the five-year-old’s eyes wide & wings lightly flapping with excitement as he clutches a homemade suit & tie in a bundle underneath his arm, a white mask in his other hand. “i want to go as a smaller slenderman! like a slender-kid.” you raise an eyebrow, curiously tilting your head.

“who taught you about slenderman?” you ask. you have a pretty good idea as to who, but you want to hear it straight from him.

“uncle hawk taught me about slenderman a few days ago, & he helped me plan!” he beams up at you. “& you should go as the big one! uh, slender-papa.”

…note to self: either thank hawk for the idea, or kick his ass later.

“slenderman?” you blink in confusion, the name ringing vaguely familiar but lacking any real context. slender-papa makes sense for you, though. “i don’t… understand who of what this is, henry.”

henry laughs, waving the mask in his hand. “he’s, like… um, super tall & creepy, & he has tentacles & no face! people think he’s scary.” he shrugs, clearly unbothered, his wings snapping out lightly, blowing your clothes back slightly. “you’d be perfect! you’re super-tall!”

…okay, you’re gonna kick your friend’s ass.

you immediately frown, casting a glance back at your phone where the group chat buzzes with excitement, the text from merrick coming in. tall. nonhuman. threatening. what a little shit. your friends, your son, your daughter… they all seem to find joy in a night of pretending, of turning fear into something playful. dressing up feels foreign to you; while you dressed up as kidpool during the halloween dance four years ago, you didn’t trick-or-treat then, nor did you bother to dress up when your second halloween in the valley rolled around. there were always too many more pressing concerns to go out & celebrate—karate drama, namely. nor your third; that had been because of the upcoming sekai taikai preparations, training with your friends & partners.

now, though, with robby’s & tory’s wins…

“i guess i just don’t see the appeal,” you admit, your voice quiet. “i’ve never had to pretend.” not within a strictly costume-based context, anyway. your kidpool costume was a nod to your alternate-current life, so maybe that doesn’t really count.

just then, @taughtpain makes his way into the kitchen, & your frown deepen when henry yelps immediately, super-speeding towards you in a blur of colors so he can hide behind your legs. you watch as he instantly throws his items into one of the cabinets by your legs, which he telekinetically closes as soon as he can. his brown eyes are wide. you maintain an expert poker face for your son’s sake, but you’re curious. does he want to keep his costume a surprise from robby? that’s kind of cute.

“hi, robby,” you greet, sounding completely casual even as you feel the slight tension radiating from henry, the sound of his heart racing slightly from almost being caught audible thanks to your hearing. “we’re discussing costumes. henry wants to dress as… a slender-kid. he wants me to be slenderman, well, slender-papa,” you clarify, keeping your expression neutral. “i don’t really know what our son’s costume is going to look like, though. i bet it’s gonna be super fucking cool.”

henry instantly clasps a hand over his mouth, stifling his giggles. the five-year-old’s long hair is tussled & sticking out every which way because of his super-speed use, brown eyes alight with humor. “super fucking cool!” he parrots you, giggling. a quiet, expectant look from you silences him, & he huffs, summoning a quarter out of thin air, the metallic coin shimmering briefly before landing in the center of his palm. he rolls his eyes dramatically in such a robby way, knowing the drill all too well. “ugh, fine. gotta pay the swear jar.” with a pout, he teleports over towards the kitchen, dropping the quarter into the small jar on the counter appropriately labeled ‘henry’s 1st swear jar’, which is slowly reaching the halfway filled mark (miguel labeled it as such with some tape), the clink echoing in the kitchen. his expression softens as he turns back to you, mischief still dancing in his eyes. “but it is super cool, right?”

you nod, smiling at him, then teleport over towards henry to ruffle his hair. he makes a soft noise of protest, batting your hands away with a defiant grunt. “yeah, bud. super cool.” you say softly, then look up at robby, grinning. “do you have your costume?”

[taughtequilibrium]

for the past handful of months, chase has been waiting with baited breath for the other shoe to drop. the first one had been dropped when robby joined cobra kai. chase has a horrible feeling that the second shoe is going to drop soon. robby's been more of an asshole lately; the comment to miguel at the drive-in a few days ago was another nail he drove in the coffin, more grave dirt shifted on top of the grave. rosalie had been the one to engrave the words the robby i grew up with into the headstone. ethan had left pretty much immediately after that nasty comment. he didn't know about miguel's clever plan to avoid a physical conflict by using the sprinkler system at the baseball diamond. he only found out about it the morning after. now that chase thinks about it, maybe it was better he left.

he's not even completely sure why robby decided to drop by his & calla's apartment pretty much unannounced, which they'd very recently moved into... literally six hours ago. the only thing that's been unpacked are the fridge, a few boxes of cutlery, the mattress in their bedroom, a side table, the tv is mounted to the wall. a few other random things, too. chase's clothes are still in boxes or suitcases, his closet barren. he's still wearing the flannel t-shirt he'd worn to school friday, which was yesterday. they don't even have a couch yet. he doesn't know where robby got the beer from. chase doesn't drink, nor does his girlfriend. there's not a single drop of alcohol in their apartment.

he doesn't ask why robby's carrying himself differently. he doesn't ask about his new clothes, the scar on his forehead, or his new friends, the very people who have repeatedly traumatized sam & ethan, or the different, colder light in his eyes. a part of him doesn't want to know. it's not his business what robby does anymore. he made sure of that.

ROMANS 6:12. therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires.

I SIT DOWN FOR DINNER WITH MY DEAD BROTHER AGAIN. THE DINNER TABLE HAS UNEVEN LEGS, & IT REMAINS UNSTEADY IF ONE OF US PUTS TOO MUCH WEIGHT ON IT. I DO NOT MAKE A MOVE TO FIX WHAT HE BROKE. I DO NOT SPEAK. HE DOES NOT LOOK AWAY FROM ME. AS FOR MY BROTHER'S CORPSE, IT CORRODES A LITTLE MORE UNDER MY GAZE. ( I CAN'T LOOK AWAY. HE IS MY BROTHER, DESPITE, DESPITE, DESPITE. THAT BOND DOES NOT WARRANT REPENTANCE IN THE HOUSE OF GOD. IT DOES NOT MATTER IF I BARELY RECOGNIZE HIM ANYMORE, & IT DOES NOT MATTER IF HE'S NO LONGER WHO HE ONCE WAS. HE IS STILL WAS MY BROTHER. )

chase can't help the way his eyes flicker towards the coors banquet beer resting in front of robby's hand... one of the more cheaper beer brands in the valley. it's his uncle johnny's favorite. half-consumed, if chase had to guess. he's been counting the sips robby's made - an engrained, learned habit he'd picked up in his childhood because of johnny & shannon, & his uncle mike to a much lesser extent.

❝ it's a beer. calm down. ❞ @taughtpain immediately defends himself.

the reaction from chase is instantaneous. his fork & knife freeze above the take-out chicken he'd gotten from the diner down the street. his eyes lift up from the plate to meet robby's without so much as blinking. a wave of lightning-hot anger slices through chase's entire body, so much so that his shoulders tremble with anger. his expression even darkens for a split second before it smooths out again, & his facial expression back to cold indifference. the younger teen inhales deeply. thank god that calla isn't here right now, that his siblings, dads & mom aren't. calla's out with ethan, emma, hawk, cosima, charlie, light, harlow & a handful of their other miyagi-do / eagle fang friends. according to light, it'd been rather difficult to drag ethan out of bed, but he eventually begrudgingly went. given ethan's recent track record of not even seeing any texts, or replying, or even being seen in public, save for school ( & even then, that's been steadily declining ), chase considers that a significant win.

GALANTIANS 5: 16-26. the acts of the flesh are obvious: immorality & impurity; idolatry; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions & envy; drunkenness, & the like. i warn you, as i did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of god. // since we live by the spirit, let us keep in step with the spirit. let us not become conceited, provoking & envying each other.

it's not just a beer, for several reasons. firstly, both of his parents are alcoholics. there's no sugarcoating that. cobra kai can't have fucked with his brother's head so quickly & so severely that he's forgotten that pivotal part of his childhood. secondly... it's everything that's happening. robby's change in personality, the karate war, the switching alliances, the broken friendships, the near karate fights that have almost broken out, ethan's rapid depressive spiral that chase can't seem to alleviate, try as he ( & every single one of their friends ) might.

his next words are way too calm, & they're said in an entirely blunt, matter-of-fact tone. ❝ yes, of course it's just a beer... & i am calm. you sound like your dad, so i guess i should start calling you that now. ❞ chase rolls his shoulders, looking very much disinterested. his tone remains indifferent.

❝ go ahead & keep drinking, johnny. let's both take a bet as to where that habit gets you. ❞ chase doesn't give robby a chance to rebut his words, & even if he did, he's not going to give a shit because he's already tuned him out, simply rising from the table. he's mindful not to bump into it because it's uneven. he walks past robby & into the kitchen to package up his leftovers, which he'll eat later, after he fucking kicks robby out of his apartment in a few moments. as it stands right now, he's completely lost his appetite.

[m00nz-writes]

Blood Drive - Blackened Angel chap. 5

When the blood drive comes to the school, Sarah struggles with her intense blood lust and Alyssa becomes irritated with the blood drive due to not being a human. She eventually caves in and gives a pint of blood until Ethan informs her that the nurses are vampires.

•*¨*•.¸¸☆*･ﾟ･*☆¸¸.•*¨*•

"Why don't you just try?" JJ suggested as he, Alyssa and Maria had a look at the blood donation line. Lyss frowned and looked at the taller teen with a scowl on her face.

"Because I'm not even remotely human. Who knows what kind of effect my blood would have on a human being?"

"Maybe it would give them superpowers!" Maria said with a bright smile on her face as the other two looked at her in disbelief. Alyssa reluctantly followed with a heavy sigh as they joined Ethan and Benny in line. Alyssa reluctantly followed, sighing heavily as they joined Ethan and Benny in line.

"You don't look so hot." JJ said, glancing at the seer.

"Ethan's afraid of needles." Benny said, keeping an eye on the attractive nurse. Alyssa frowned, feeling a pit in her stomach as she studied the two nurses. Something about them just seemed… wrong.

"I'm not a chicken! I'm a hawk with… razor-sharp talons and laser eyes!" Ethan shouted after Benny started to tease him about being scared, breaking Alyssa's train of thought as she looked over at them. Ethan glanced back at the nurses before he started to feel queasy and almost fell over. Alyssa quickly put her hands on his arms and helped him to his feet, her eyebrows furrowed.

"You sure you wanna be here?" she asked softly as he nodded.

"Yeah… yeah… I just…" he trailed off before the group saw Sarah. "I need to talk to Sarah." he pulled away and started to walk over to her. Alyssa looked at JJ as he motioned for her to follow the seer, she rolled her eyes and brushed her fringe from her face as she quickly followed him.

"Hey." Alyssa said as she and Ethan made their way to the fledgling. She gave an absent-minded greeting and Lyss furrowed her brow.

"You okay?" Ethan asked and the teen nodded, still shoveling chips into her mouth.

"Sure… don't I look okay?"

"You're practically covered in chips." Alyssa said as the other teen looked at the two of them and sighed as she wiped her face.

"All of this blood is really getting to you, huh?" Ethan asked and Sarah huffed.

"It's like letting the contestants from The Bigger Loser loose in a chocolate factory!" she whined, looking between them as Alyssa snorted and shrugged.

"Do you need help…?" Ethan asked before looking at Alyssa. "We could be your diet buddies," he added before Lyss lightly slapped his arm.

"Or you could just feed off me." she suggested as Ethan looked at her wide-eyed. "What? I'm not even close to human. I highly doubt that drinking my blood will turn her into a vampire or whatever."

"It's Erica I'm worried about. She doesn't have much self-control, and if…" Sarah trailed off before the said vampire turned around and startled Alyssa, who turned around to look at her.

"Hey, Sarah." Erica said casually, holding a tray of cookies that caught Alyssa's attention. "Cookie?" she asked before the hunter grabbed a couple of them and immediately shoved one of them into her mouth. Unsurprisingly, they were relatively dry, but at least they were sweet. Erica quickly snatched the second one from Alyssa's hand, causing the nephilim to frown. "Those are not for you!"

"I don't see anyone else taking any!" Lyss complained, trying to get the cookie back. Erica held it up too high for Lyss to grab, being taller than the Slayer, causing her to groan and finish the cookie she still held. "Bitch…" she muttered, earning a kick from Erica. Lyss grimaced and quickly knelt down to hold her shin, glaring up at her.

"Stop it!" Sarah snapped, looking between them. Ethan grabbed Alyssa by the arm and pulled her back to the line where JJ and Maria were laughing at the interaction.

"Dude, you really need to cut back on the amount of sweets you eat." JJ teased while Lyss rolled her eyes in derision.

"This coming from the guy who practically eats protein…" she muttered as she crossed her arms. "I was robbed of that second cookie."

"To be fair, those are only for people who give blood." Maria commented, holding on to JJ's arm as she looked over at the hunter.

"I'm an athlete," the taller teen added. "I need protein to keep me strong."

"You're built like a bodybuilder at 15. Why on earth would you need more protein?" Alyssa rolled her eyes and looked over at Ethan as he tried to make his way over to Erica and Rory, only to faint at the sight of a needle. Alyssa's eyes widened as she rushed to catch him, stumbling with him in her arms as a nurse came to check on him.

"You should take him to the nurse's office." she said, looking up at the hunter as she nodded and awkwardly picked him up. She sighed and rolled her eyes a little as she carried him out of the room. A few students laughed at the scene and Lyss turned around to quickly flip them off before continuing on her way.

Alyssa stumbled into the office with Ethan still in her arms, still unconscious. The school nurse panicked at the sight of them and quickly got up from her desk as Alyssa placed him on the bed and left the room to wait in the hallway. Eventually, she sat down near the door and took off her backpack, pulling an energy drink out of it, and opened it up. She grabbed her phone and scrolled through her timeline in a mind-numbing manner, her eyebrows furrowing as she focused on the stupid things people said when they were behind a screen.

"Hey.." Ethan muttered, leaving the office and sitting beside her with an ice pack. He made a small grimace at the pain, and Lyss offered him the can, from which he took a reluctant sip. He grimaced at how it tasted when Alyssa giggled and smiled at him. "How can you drink this stuff? It's like… battery acid."

"It's an acquired taste." she teased, giving him a light nudge. "You definitely had no complaints when we were at the concert."

"Yeah, because I was too focused on the fact that the lead singer almost fell off the stage several times." he commented, looking back at her as she shrugged her shoulders.

"I was more worried about all the pictures that Kimmie kept trying to take of us…" she admitted, sipping her drink as she looked back at the screen of her phone. "I mean… I don't mind letting my friends see me with you, but I'm more worried about what other baddies might think." she admitted with a small shrug.

"You don't have to worry about me." he assured her but she shook her head.

"Of course I do… I've been training my whole life for what we're going to deal with now, but you've been thrown into it." he frowned at her. "If you got hurt because of me…" she trailed off before leaning against him and resting her head on his shoulder.

"It'll be okay." he said quietly before his phone rang. He pulled it from his pocket and answered it as Alyssa sat up, watching him rise from the floor. He talked to Benny for a little while and Lyss frowned when she heard a loud crash close by and pushed herself up to look down the hall and see that Sarah had broken the vending machine. Slinging her backpack over her shoulder, Lyss stood and walked over to her.

"My offer stands." Lyss commented as the fledgling's gaze fell on her.

"No way. What if I seriously hurt you? Or I turn into a full vampire?" she said as Alyssa giggled.

"I could always ask V is he can help you out." she suggested but Sarah shook her head. "So you would rather stuff your face with junk food until this whole thing passes? That's still a few hours, Sarah."

"I don't want to hurt you." she said as Alyssa shrugged and put down her backpack, pulling out a larger bag of unopened chips and offering them to her as Sarah quickly snatched them out of her hands. "Do you always carry junk food with you?"

"My family isn't really known for eating a healthy diet." Alyssa shrugged as she stood up straight. "Not that it's a problem. My metabolism is crazy, and my body doesn't need to eat as much as the average person." she said, smiling a little before she looked back at Ethan. "I'll see you later." she called out, starting to walk down the hallway as he waved a little.

•¨•.¸¸☆･ﾟ･☆¸¸.•¨•

At the end of the school day, Alyssa made her way to her locker and opened it. She put all of her textbooks back in the locker except for the few she needed for study and homework, closed the locker, and walked away as she thought about the blood drive. It was the last call and she was thinking about maybe giving some blood… sure, she was half demon, but she was also half angel. She wasn't entirely sure if her blood would do any good, but maybe if it could be of some real help to people, then it would be worth it.

Alyssa hurried in right after the last guy and looked at the younger nurse before waving her over. She walked over to them with a friendly smile on her face as she looked over at the hunter.

"Okay… this is going to sound super weird, but…" she trailed off, thinking for a moment about how to phrase the next thing she was going to say. "If someone donated blood as, say… an angel/devil hybrid, would that cause any problems?" she asked, the woman laughing softly.

"I know you're a Nephilim." she assured her, Lyss nodding despite a slight frown. "If you wish, you can donate blood." she added. The woman led her over to the empty chair, made her sit down and began to get everything ready. She cleaned the area where she was going to take the blood from, not bothering to be as careful as she usually was, since Alyssa was going to be completely fine right after this. "This is only going to hurt for a moment." she said as she prepared the needle and inserted it into Alyssa's skin.

In comparison to everything else she had been through in the past few months, the insertion of the needle was barely noticeable. She felt the ink on her skin begin to shift and wriggle as the needle came dangerously close to where everything rested. She mentally apologized to Shadow for disturbing her slumber in the ink. When the blood withdrawal was complete, the nurse withdrew the needle from her skin, almost inhaling the scent of her blood.

"And you're all done." she gave the hunter a friendly smile before Lyss sat up and the wound healed in an instant. "Feel free to help yourself to a cookie." she added as Alyssa got out of the chair and walked over to the tray, grabbed two cookies and was about to head out of there before she noticed Ethan. She hesitated as the nurses turned their attention to him, immediately intrigued by his appearance.

"I know I missed last call, but… I have a pint of blood sloshing around inside of me. I promise I won't faint." he offered an awkward smile as the blonde nodded and led him to the chair. Alyssa walked back into the room and came to stand next to Ethan as he looked up at her. "You don't have to stay." he assured her, but she shook her head.

"I want to make sure you're gonna be okay." she assured him as she offered him a hand, which he reluctantly took. He held on to it as the nurse made sure that he was ready to have his blood drawn. He squeezed Alyssa's hand a little as he started to panic, but Alyssa lightly stroked the back of his hand with her thumb, which helped to calm his nerves a little. When the nurse touched his arm he had a vision and panicked again as Alyssa's brow furrowed and she put her free hand on his shoulder, reassuring him that he'd be okay.

"It's okay. I don't bite." she assured him as he looked nervously between her and Alyssa.

"Promise…?" he asked softly as she prepared to insert the needle.

"Annie, let's go!" the other nurse said as the woman in front of the teens sighed.

"Maybe another time." she said as she leaned down to inhale Ethan's scent. "Too bad, you smell… interesting," she said before getting up and making her way to the last container of blood bags. Lyss watched her intently, her eyebrows furrowed as Ethan was in a state of panic again.

"She's a vampire." he said hastily and Lyss looked at him and released his hand.

"I knew there was something wrong with her," she hissed, her eyes back on the door. "I bet they don't even donate the damned blood." she added, unclenching her fists frustrated before Ethan stood up.

"We don't know that." he said, looking over at her as she turned back to him. They both looked over at Sarah's entrance as Ethan informed her of the situation they were in. The girl panicked at the smell of Ethan's blood and Lyss picked up more cookies and handed them to her before taking the rest of the tray and tossing them into her bag. "Gross…" Ethan muttered before she gave him a light kick and a glare.

•¨•.¸¸☆･ﾟ･☆¸¸.•¨•

Alyssa kept her mind on the road as she sped to meet the gang at the warehouse Benny had sent her the address for, pulling into the relatively empty lot before speeding toward the already open door. She came to a screeching halt between Sarah and Ethan and the vampires, releasing Shadow from the ink as the two vampires seemed to recoil in fear of the demon. Shadow growled at them as the older woman looked at Alyssa.

"You're Dante's daughter." she said as Lyss frowned slightly and got off the bike to look at her. "I knew there was something familiar about you."

"Who gives a damn whose daughter I am?" Alyssa asked, pulling the Ultimatum out of the hidden holsters as she pointed the gun at her. "You have my friends, and I am going to beat the crap out of you." she said as the woman laughed.

"You are not as strong as your father. You have no power here."

"She's a lot stronger than she looks." Sarah interjected, glaring at the two vampires.

"She's strong, but she can't control what she's doing." the vampire said bluntly before the younger one groaned.

"Enough talking! She hissed, lunging at Alyssa as the hybrid hit her as hard as she could. The vampire slammed into the nearest wall at the force of the blow and collapsed to the floor as Lyss gave her a small shake of the hand and a grimace.

"Damn… that fucking hurt…" she murmured as Shadow tried to attack the other vampire. Sarah took care of Annie while Alyssa made her way to the truck and tried to open the door when she doubled over in pain and let out a guttural scream. She looked over at Shadow and saw that she was lying on the ground, having been badly injured.

"You're bound to the demon." the woman scoffed at the sight of Alyssa in excruciating pain. "If I were to kill her, then you would be dead as well." she added before Alyssa shot her in the shoulder, causing her to scream in pain and stumble backwards as she held onto her shoulder.

"Kill her and I'll drag you to hell!" Alyssa yelled as she looked down at the demon before she ran over to the vampire. The woman kicked the gun out of her hands and grabbed her by the throat, lifting her up as the nephilim struggled in her grasp, letting out a choked sob as the blonde's hand tightened around her throat. Alyssa tried to kick her as she struggled for breath, but another shot rang out and both Alyssa and the vampire looked over at Ethan to see that he did indeed have the Ultimatum in his hand.

"Put her down!" he shouted shakily, getting nervous holding an actual gun. The vampire smiled at him as she looked back at Alyssa, her smile quickly fading as she saw that Lyss' arm had transformed and she hit her as hard as she could, the claws on her Devil Arm slicing into her face as she dropped the nephilim and screamed. Alyssa fell to her knees as she took a few deep breaths. She looked back at Shadow before crawling over to her and placing a hand on her head. The demon lifted her head to look at Alyssa, caressing her head and planting a soft kiss on her muzzle.

"It's okay, Shad. You can rest…" she whispered before the demon returned the ink and Lyss felt her body finally stop hurting as Shadow began healing inside the ink. Alyssa got up and ran over to Ethan and grabbed the gun from him just as Annie grabbed Sarah and smiled at them. The other vampire turned to face them, the wounds from the attack not having healed in the slightest. Ethan grabbed Alyssa's arm as she looked between the two vampires in a bit of panic.

"Kill her and I'll kill your friend." Annie yelled, holding on to Sarah even tighter as the attention of the hunter turned to her.

"Let her go." Lyss warned, pointing the gun at them as Sarah panicked and fought harder.

"Or what?" the blonde smiled a little wider. "One wrong move and she's dead." Alyssa's hand shook before she lowered the gun and dropped to her knees to put it down as the vampire finally let go of Sarah. The girl ran over to Alyssa and hid behind her next to Ethan as both vampires glared at them. Both of the vampires ran towards them and Alyssa screamed, holding her arms in front of Ethan and Sarah as the vampires came closer, but she opened her eyes to see that both of the vampires were… seemingly frozen in place. "What the hell?!" Annie yelled as Alyssa looked at them, her eyes widening at the realization that she was the reason they were stopped.

"I have my dad's telekenisis…" she whispered before releasing the vampires as they both collapsed. She lowered her arms before reaching for her weapon.

"You brat!" Annie shouted in anger as Alyssa pointed the gun in her direction.

"I really have no desire to kill either of you," she admitted with a scowl. "But if the two of you are serious about trying to kill us because you kidnapped our friends and are running a blood donation scam, then all right. I'm gonna tear you both apart and feed you Shadow."

"What do you want?" the older vampire asked surprisingly calmly, looking at the trio.

"What I want is for you to give me back my friends and for you to stay the hell away from Whitechapel!" Lyss snapped. "We have enough problems here as it is. Go bother some other people and leave us out of it!"

"Give us a pint of his blood and we'll be on our way," she replied as Alyssa looked over at Ethan and quickly held an arm out in front of him for protection. "You care about him…how sweet." she rolled her eyes as Alyssa growled at her.

"You should watch your words. Keep in mind, I'm the one who can easily kill both of you." she glared at both vampires. "I'm giving you the chance to escape with your lives."

"I'll do it." Ethan said quickly, taking both Alyssa and Sarah by surprise. "But I want Sarah to do it. I don't trust either of you." he added as Lyss had a slight frown on her face but lowered her arm. Both stood up and Annie tried to charge them, but the other blonde stopped her.

"Why do you have to do everything the hard way?" she yelled, shoving the younger vampire back before grabbing an unfilled blood bag. She handed it to Sarah as Alyssa put her gun in the holster and looked over at Ethan, putting a hand on his arm.

"Are you sure about this…?" she asked and he nodded.

"Yeah… if it means they leave for good and nobody dies, it's a win-win." he assured her, smiling nervously. She nodded and gently took his hand in an attempt to help him relax as Sarah reluctantly walked over. Ethan gripped Alyssa's hand tightly as he squeezed his eyes shut, while Lyss put her free hand on his shoulder and looked in the direction of Sarah. The fledgling took a deep breath and began to draw in the blood as Ethan jumped and let out a yelp of pain as the hunter lightly rubbed his shoulder and rested her head against his as it ended just as quickly as it had begun. She looked up at Sarah as Annie grabbed the bag out of her hands and Lyss looked down at Ethan.

"You did a great job." she said reassuringly as he gave a nervous smile. She helped him stand, still holding his hand as Benny ran over holding a strange device.

"Behold! The power of technology!" he shouted, pressing a button to no avail. Benny slapped the device before pointing it at the truck. "Doorus openus." he said as Alyssa looked at the doors and used her new found power to swing them open. Her eyes widened as she saw Erica and Rory kissing and she stared at them with her mouth hanging open in shock.

"He wouldn't shut up! Kissing him actually seemed like a good idea!" Erica said as they got out of the truck. The other vampires closed the doors with a roll of their eyes.

"I'm surrounded by vampire noobs." one of them muttered as Alyssa covered her mouth and giggled.

"Do you need a ride home?" she asked Erica as she shook her head and looked at Rory.

"Nah… it's a nice night and we could use the flying practice." she waved her hand dismissively before she and the other blonde walked out of the warehouse. Alyssa cringed as she heard Erica slap Rory and laughed softly as Benny and Sarah made their way out and the blood truck pulled away from the warehouse. Lyss finally let go of Ethan's hand and smiled awkwardly before she started to get on her bike.

"So… that wasn't Benny's horrible attempt to open the door that worked, was it?" he asked and she scoffed and got on.

"Doorus openus?" she mocked, pretending to use a wand as the Seer laughed. "No way, that was me… which I'm impressed with, because I just found out that I have telekenisis and I can… kind of control it." she smiled at him as he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Are you okay…?" he asked as she looked up at him with a shrug of her shoulders as she leaned against the handlebars.

"I'm fine… it's just…" she frowned, resting her chin on her arm. "I'm having trouble finding my place…"

"What do you mean?"

"You, Benny, Sarah… you all have your place in this shit." she sat up and looked at the Seer. "Sure, I've been in training for all this stuff. My whole life has been nothing but training for the moment when I have to step up and take over Devil May Cry… and yet it feels like I'm just kind of fucked."

"You're the reason any of us are still alive." Ethan assured her as she gave a small smile.

"I know that… if it wasn't for me, you'd probably be dead," she teased before the smile faded. "I don't know… I guess I just suffer with this… thing. You know, when things are going great but you still feel like you're failing?"

"Imposter Syndrome." Ethan clarified and she snapped her fingers.

"That's the one." she nodded with a sigh. "Maybe I need to pay a visit to my uncle…" she muttered as Ethan frowned at her.

"Vitale?" he asked as she looked up at him and his eyes went wide with surprise. "You're not talking about the other one… are you?"

[ghostboyhood]

WOAH THEY ARE HYPED!!! YEAHHH!!!!!

he is giggling liek a CHILD i love it

WHAT "youre not dressed.." "layoff" "its not thag i dont like it" "what?" "nothing." PLEASE

please theyre so hot, im in love w ethans hair,, also the way they filmed this is so like.. interesting i love it sm

i need themineed them please ethan is so

THEY SAID THE THING THAT MADE ME WATCH THIS MOVIE "a phallic fashion"

oh boy

NOT AN ATTRACTIVE QUALITY ANYMORE HELP SORRY THATS KINDA FUNNY

a politically correct Fuck.

whys he fucking standing face to face w the door

todd and neil if they didnt grow up rich at that school nd went to public school with divorced parents

love the use of fag, sorry i think its funny when straight ppl say fag (im.. joking kinda i dont usually rlly give a shit)

i LOVE ethans energy in this movie, he reminds me of me not in the manly man way js how jumpy nd running around he is

HEYY!!!!!!

whys he swaying his hips like that

PILLOW FIGHT!!!

ethan hawked voice like... slightly doesnt fit his looks.. like it does but doesnt idk

lordd hes an ass

watching tape 2001!!

HELP HI ETHAN HAWKE

[odysseussolar]

*sprays all of you with a spray bottle*

stop fucking sexualizing the cast of the black phone. Y’all are fucking gross. They’re literal kids, I don’t give a fuck if you’re a minor you’re disgusting. STOP. SEXUALIZING. THE. CAST. Also, DONT SEXUALIZE THE CHARACTERS EITHER YOU GROSS FUCKS. Some of y’all are adults, and that’s really fucking creepy and y’all need help. Literal fucking help. The rest of you little kids need to stop and understand what you’re doing is making a lot of people uncomfortable which ding ding ding means the cast themselves. Fucking stop it.

i get it, you have a crush on the actor or character? (Minors) that’s fine. I understand, that’s okay. But sexualizing and writing smut about the actor is not okay one bit. Actors think about quitting, leaving, not wanting to do these awesome things anymore because of that kind of stuff. These type of things also give perverts reasons to do more of it, to make more gross comments.

Now you adults that are doing this shit? Y’all are fucking gross. I show no fucking mercy to you perverts. Y’all are so disgusting. I had to deal with sickos like you when I was a kid and I don’t want these kids online having to face you weirdos. You all need mental fucking help. The fact you’re drooling over these kids is enough for me to know y’all don’t deserve to see the light of day.

Extra:

Also, THE GRABBER IS A FUCKING PREDATOR AND DISGUSTING PERSON. HES NOT HOT. HE LIKES LITTLE KIDS AND MURDERS THEM. Ethan Hawke is an attractive man, I get the one, but not the grabber. The grabber is gross. The grabber deserves to be locked in a prison and beat up by all of his fellow prisoners by what he did to those boys.

[wayward-persephone]

Hey! Just wanted to tell you that your work is some of the best I've read on this app. Your Ethan Hawke work is so well-written and adapts to each of his characters without feeling clunky. Just keep doing what makes you happy. Also, I went to horror nights @ Universal (Hollywood) and the scare actors in The Black Phone maze were so hot lol.

I'm just...

THANK YOU SO MUCH 😭💙😭💙

This honestly had me tearing up. This means the world to me and I can't thank you enough 💙💙🙏🙏💙💙

Also I'd be acting a fool if I was in your shoes. I'm already feral enough for him on the screen I don't need anything else helping 😆

[sisterspooky1013]

Only One Choice, Part 2, Chapter 24

Read it here on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic

June 1999

The air smells wet and woody, birdsongs trilling in the early morning sun that trickles through a sky light. She stretches, then disentangles her legs from the sheets and stands, walking to the window.

There is a giant soaking tub in the corner of the room, flanked by two windowed walls that afford a sweeping view of the Cascade mountains, green carpeted hillsides meeting with a baby-blue sky.

She can still recall her mother’s face when they told her the wedding would be in Washington State. “But...we don’t even know anyone in Washington, Dana,” she’d said with a bemused expression, lamenting the length of their flights with a nine-month-old in tow.

Her mother’s reaction paled in comparison to Mulder’s excitement when she’d suggested the idea; she would spend their honeymoon relaxing with a book in the tub, and he could spend it traipsing through the woods looking for Sasquatch, or ‘squatchin’ as he called it. They would reunite in the afternoon, hiking, making love, catching up on all the conversations they’d missed while in the trenches of parenting a new baby. Mom would stay at the same resort with Molly so they could see her every day, while having precious nights to themselves; something they haven’t done since she was born.

She turns the tap on the bath, a blast of water thundering into the empty basin. When it’s full nearly to the brim, she disrobes and eases in, breathing deeply to inhale the juniper-scented steam, courtesy of the resort-provided bath salts. Closing her eyes, she thinks back over it all; their chance meeting, how she was drawn to him by a force that seemed to be bigger than them both, the anguish of wanting him but feeling like she owed it to Ethan to stay together. Her eyes snap open, a memory long-buried in the recesses of her mind springing forth like a trebuchet.

The day she met Mulder, she’d been planning to take the day off to go to a book signing for an author she admires. The signing was cancelled due to a scheduling conflict and she almost took the day off anyway, but had a last minute pang of guilt knowing that the workload that week was already heavy and Trudy would struggle to manage it all on her own. So she’d gone in, she’d performed that autopsy that should have been on Trudy’s docket, and she’d filled out the paperwork, and she’d met Mulder. How delicate the balance of the universe that such an insignificant choice completely changed the course of her life.

She suddenly misses him acutely, and a bundle of nerves and excitement flutters in her belly thinking about when she’ll see him next. She’d scoffed at the idea of them spending last night apart; they live together and have a child so the performative chastity seemed to be a bit much. He said it was like a fast, that a little time apart would make it even more special when they saw each other at the ceremony, and she ultimately acquiesced.

“Meet me on a mountain top at 4 o’clock tomorrow?” he’d asked as he backed out of her room, pulling away from the desperate kisses she was planting all over his face.

“Wouldn’t miss it,” she replied with a smile, and they said goodnight.

She smiles again, sinking down until the water slips into her ears. She can’t wait to marry him.

———

He sits up and arches his back, his spine protesting the cramped accommodations. Looking over at Byers and Missy curled up in the king size bed, he regrets his decision to crash on the couch here instead of staying with Scully in their room. Not only because he slept like shit with his legs hanging over the end, but also because work takes him away from his girls so often, he’s an idiot to add another day to it if he doesn’t have to.

He stands, hands on his hips as he twists to stretch his angry muscles, and walks to the window, taking in the dense green hills and valleys that surround them. He smiles, because she could have asked to go to Mexico, or France, or anywhere on the entire Earth and he would have given her what she wanted, but she chose the place she knew he wanted to go. Selfless and giving to a fault, his Scully. Soon to be his wife.

He quietly slips on his running shoes and sneaks out of the room, hitting the hard-packed dirt trail the concierge had told him about. The quiet forest is the perfect place to be alone with his thoughts, nothing but the thud of his feet striking the ground and the twitter of waking birds to distract him. He thinks about his life, about being a child who was lonely and alone, with parents who provided food and shelter but not much more. He thinks about Molly, and how she will never know that kind of pain, that there will never be a day of her life that she is not told how much she is loved. He wonders if his dad ever felt about his mom the way he feels about Scully, and he knows it’s not possible that he did, because if so they would still be together.

He comes to a break in the trees and pauses, breath heaving and lungs burning as he watches a hawk gliding through the valley below, hunting for breakfast. How easily he could have missed this moment, he thinks. Even one small change to the trajectory of his life, and he never would have walked into the autopsy bay that day. If the courier hadn’t been sick, if he hadn’t stopped by Kirkbride’s office when he did. Even further back, if he hadn’t stayed with the bureau with the X files were closed, if Valerie hadn’t been there to encourage him, or if he hadn’t met Valerie one random Tuesday at a record store. The path was long and winding, and it led to her. It led to him on this mountaintop in a sweat-soaked T-shirt, smiling at the thought of his baby daughter, his almost-wife.

He picks up running again, the smile staying on his lips. He’s always felt like he was running away; from his painful past, his regrets, his bad decisions. Now he realizes he’s running towards; his future, a thousand opportunities yet unseen, a kind of happiness he never thought he’d know. He can’t wait for the rest of his life to start.

———

He stands in a clearing near the edge of a cliff, the lush green landscape toeing up against the horizon looking like crooked teeth. Frohike stands beside him in khaki pants and a white linen shirt, a leather folio clasped in his hands. Mulder is also dressed fairly casually, in slacks and a blue Oxford shirt, the sleeves cuffed and the top button undone.

Scully wanted this to be as non-traditional as possible, to make it their own. There is no wedding party, no tuxedo, no flower girl or garter toss. No one will walk her down the aisle, as no one but herself has the ownership to give her away. The guests are small in number; immediate family only, plus the gunmen. Monica and Dahlia are house-sitting back in DC, minding Priscilla as well as the dog, King, that joined the family after the purchase of their house in March. Bucking the idea of arranging guests by whose “side” they are on, they all sit in a small cluster, and Scully will enter from the side.

He looks out and waves at Molly, who is standing on Missy’s lap, holding her hands and bouncing up and down forcefully. She squeals and shouts “dah, dah, dah!” which he chooses to interpret as “Daddy” even though Scully told him it’s just a nonsense syllable and doesn’t mean anything.

Langly gets the signal from Frohike and hits play on a small boom box, piping an instrumental version of “Can’t Help Falling in Love” up into the branches of the towering evergreen trees. He expected to feel nervous at this moment, but all he feels is excitement as Maggie scurries out from behind a line of trees and takes her place beside Bill, giving him a smile and a wink.

Scully appears from around the same group of trees and he grins broadly. He’s seen the dress, they picked it out together, but the full effect is stunning. Her hair, now grown well past her shoulder blades, is curled softly and pinned half up, brilliant red tendrils shimmering in the midday sun against her porcelain shoulders. Her dress is full length pearl satin, a slim sheath cut with off the shoulder straps. She is holding a small bouquet of pink peonies in her hands, and holding his eye with a playful smirk.

She arrives beside him and before the music stops, before Frohike has a chance to begin, he steps forward and takes her by the waist, kissing her fully. The guests laugh and he pulls away to see a confused smile on her face.

“I couldn’t wait,” he says simply.

They move through the ceremony, exchanging rings and vowing to love each other forever; promises they’ve already made to each other a hundred times. As they near the part that Scully understands to be the end, Frohike goes off script.

“Mulder has prepared some words of his own, he’ll read them now,” he says, nodding toward his friend.

Scully’s eyebrows lift in a surprised and confused expression.

“Mulder, we didn’t talk about writing our own vows,” she whispers, afraid she’s failed to complete the assignment.

“It’s okay, these are for both of us,” he whispers, and then, taking her hands in his, he reads a passage from her favorite book from memory.

“I have for the first time found what I can truly love; I have found you. You are my sympathy, my better self, my good angel; I am bound to you with a strong attachment. I think you good, gifted, lovely. A fervent, a solemn passion is conceived in my heart; it leans to you, draws you to my center and spring of life, wraps my existence about you, and kindling in pure, powerful flame, fuses you and me in one.”

The tear that slips down her cheek is borne only of happiness. She looks into his green eyes and sees contentment and love, and desire. It’s not a spark, what they have, nor an ember. It’s a wildfire, a white-hot torch, an eternal flame that binds them together inseparably. They were forged in fire the moment he laid eyes on her in that autopsy bay, maybe even before.

Frohike concludes, “by the power invested in me by the State of Washington, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride…again.”

He wraps his arms around her waist, lifting her up as he kisses her deeply, a gust of warm summer wind picking up pine needles and tossing them in a mini-tornado that surrounds them both. Molly squeals “dah dah dah!” and claps for her parents.

———

She stands at the mirror, brushing her teeth. Her hair is combed out, her makeup removed, the white dress hanging in the corner of the room with the hem now tinged brown from the dirt that served as their dance floor.

Mulder appears behind her, an arm snaking around the waist of her satin nightgown. She smiles at the sight of his newly ring-adorned hand pressed flat against her belly, then leans forward to rinse.

“Ready for bed?” he asks softly, and she nods.

They slip beneath the cool sheets, curling around one another face-to-face; her leg threaded between his, his arms around her back, foreheads touching. She draws in a big breath and lets it out slowly, contentment settling deep in her bones.

“Do you ever think about all the things that had to happen in exactly the way they did to lead us here?” he asks, and she pulls back a little to look at his face.

“Yes, I was actually just thinking about that earlier,” she says with a curious lilt.

“Makes you wonder, huh, what lives we’d be leading if even just one detail were changed,” he says, tracing his finger along her shoulder blade.

“I don’t think it would have mattered, actually,” she says, and he gives her a quizzical look, silently asking her to elaborate. “I know this will sound a little far-fetched coming from me,” she begins with a self-conscious smile, “but I think it was always going to end up this way. Even if we hadn’t met when we did, we would have crossed paths some other way. Looking back over everything, it just seems like this was meant to be the outcome, even if the path to get here could have gone in a lot of different directions.”

He ponders this, remembering a conversation they had over coffee when, against all odds, she reappeared in his life.

“Like there was only one choice, and signs along the way to pay attention to,” he says contemplatively, lifting his hand to brush a lock of hair behind her ear.

“Exactly,” she replies, pressing her lips to his briefly, “it was always going to be you.”

END

[mostlymovieswithmax]

Movies I watched in May

Sadly, I kind of skipped writing a post for April. It was a mad month with so much going on: lots of emails sent and lots of stress. I started a new job so I’m getting to grips with that... and even then, I still watched a bunch of movies. But this is about what I watched in May and, yeah… still a bunch. So if you’re looking to get into some other movies - possibly some you’ve thought about watching but didn’t know what they were like, or maybe like the look of something you’ve never heard of - then this may help! So here’s every film I watched from the 1st to the 31st of May 2021 Tenet (2020) - 8/10 This was my third time watching Christopher Nolan’s most Christopher Nolan movie ever and it makes no sense but I still love it. The spectacle of it all is truly like nothing I’ve ever seen. I had also watched it four days prior to this watch also, only this time I had enabled audio description for the visually impaired, thinking it would make it funny… It didn’t.

Nomadland (2020) - 6/10 Chloé Zhao’s new movie got a lot of awards attention. Everyone was hyped for this and when it got put out on Disney+ I was eager to see what all the fuss was about. Seeing these real nomads certainly gave the film an authenticity, along with McDormand’s ever-praisable acting. But generally I found it quite underwhelming and lacking a lot in its pacing. Nomadland surely has its moments of captivating cinematography and enticing commentary on the culture of these people, but it felt like it went on forever without any kind of forward direction or goal. The Prince of Egypt (1998) - 6/10 I reviewed this on my podcast, The Sunday Movie Marathon. For what it is, it’s pretty fun but nowhere near as good as some of the best DreamWorks movies.

Chinatown (1974) - 8/10 What a fantastic and wonderfully unpredictable mystery crime film! I regret to say I’ve not seen many Jack Nicholson performances but he steals the show. Despite Polanski’s infamy, it’d be a lie to claim this wasn’t truly masterful. Howl’s Moving Castle (2004) - 8/10 Admittedly I was half asleep as I curled up on the sofa to watch this again on a whim. I watched this with someone who demanded the dubbed version over the subtitled version and while I objected heavily, I knew I’d seen the movie before so it didn’t matter too much. That person also fell asleep about 20 minutes in, so how pointless an argument it was. Howl’s Moving Castle boasts superb animation, the likes of which I’ve only come to expect of Miyazaki. The story is so unique and the colours are absolutely gorgeous. This may not be my favourite from the legendary director but there’s no denying its splendour.

Bāhubali: The Beginning (2015) - 3/10 The next morning I watched some absolute trash. This crazy, over the top Indian movie is hilarious and I could perhaps recommend it if it weren’t so long. That being said, Bāhubali was not a dumpster fire; it has a lot of good-looking visual effects and it’s easy to see the ambition for this epic story, it just doesn’t come together. There’s fun to be had with how the main character is basically the strongest man in the world and yet still comes across as just a lucky dumbass, along with all the dancing that makes no sense but is still entertaining to watch. Seven Samurai (1954) - 10/10 If it wasn’t obvious already, Seven Samurai is a masterpiece. I reviewed this on The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast, so more thoughts can be found there. Red Road (2006) - 6/10 Another recommendation on episode 30 of the podcast. Red Road really captures the authentic British working class experience. Before Sunrise (1995) - 10/10 One of the best romances put to film. The first in Richard Linklater’s Before Trilogy is undoubtedly my favourite, despite its counterparts being almost equally as good. It tells the story of a young couple travelling through Europe, who happen to meet on a train and spend the day together. It is gloriously shot on location in Vienna and features some of the most interesting dialogue I’ve ever seen put to film. Heartbreakingly beautiful.

Tokyo Story (1953) - 9/10 This Japanese classic - along with being visually and sonically masterful - is a lot about appreciating the people in your life and taking the time to show them that you love them. It’s about knowing it’s never too late to rekindle old relationships if you truly want to, which is something I’ve been able to relate to in recent years. It broke my heart in two. Tokyo Story will make you want to call your mother. Before Sunset (2004) - 10/10 Almost a decade after Sunrise, Sunset carries a sombre yet relieving feeling. Again, the performances from Julie Delpy and Ethan Hawke take me away, evoking nostalgic feelings as they stroll through the contemporary Parisian streets. There is no regret in me for buying the Criterion blu-ray boxset for this trilogy. Before Midnight (2013) - 10/10 Here, Linklater cements this trilogy as one of the best in film history. It’s certainly not the ending I expected, yet it’s an ending I appreciate endlessly. Because it doesn’t really end. Midnight shows the troubling times of a strained relationship; one that has endured so long and despite initially feeling almost dreamlike in how idealistically that first encounter was portrayed, the cracks appear as the film forces you to come to terms with the fact that fairy-tale romances just don’t exist. Relationships require effort and sacrifice and sometimes the ones that truly work are those that endure through all the rough patches to emerge stronger. The Holy Mountain (1973) - 10/10 Jodorowsky’s masterpiece is absolute insanity. I talked more about it on The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast.

The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014) - 10/10 Another watch for Grand Budapest because I bought the Criterion blu-ray. As unalterably perfect as ever. Blue Jay (2016) - 6/10 Rather good up to a point. My co-hosts and I did not agree on how good this movie was, which is a discussion you can listen to on my podcast. Shadow and Bone: The Afterparty (2021) - 3/10 For what it’s worth, I really enjoyed the first season of Shadow and Bone, which is why I wanted to see what ‘The Afterparty’ was about. This could have been a lot better and much less annoying if all those terrible comedians weren’t hosting and telling bad jokes. I don’t want to see Fortune Feimster attempt to tell a joke about oiling her body as the cast of the show sit awkwardly in their homes over Zoom. If it had simply been a half hour, 45 minute chat with the cast and crew about how they made the show and their thoughts on it, a lot of embarrassment and time-wasting could have been spared. Wadjda (2012) - 6/10 Another recommendation discussed at length on The Sunday Movie Marathon. Wadjda was pretty interesting from a cultural perspective but largely familiar in terms of story structure.

Freddy Got Fingered (2001) - 2/10 A truly terrible movie with maybe one or two scenes that stop it from being a complete catastrophe. Tom Green tried to create something that almost holds a middle finger to everyone who watches it and to some that could be a fun experience, but to me it just came across as utterly irritating. It’s simply a bunch of scenes threaded together with an incredibly loose plot. He wears the skin of a dead deer, smacks a disabled woman over and over again on the legs to turn her on, and he swings a newborn baby around a hospital room by its umbilical cord (that part was actually pretty funny). I cannot believe I watched this again, although I think I repressed a lot of it since having seen it for the first time around five years ago. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1 - (2011) I have to say, these movies seem to get better with each instalment. They’re still not very good though. That being said, I’m amazed at how many times I’ve watched each of the Twilight movies at this point. This time around, I watched Breaking Dawn - Part 1 with a YMS commentary track on YouTube and that made the experience a lot more entertaining. Otherwise, this film is super dumb but pretty entertaining. I would recommend watching these movies with friends. Solaris (1972) - 8/10 Andrei Tarkovsky’s grand sci-fi epic about the emotional crises of a crew on the space station orbiting the fictional planet Solaris is much as strange and creepy as you might expect from the master Russian auter. I had wanted to watch this for a while so I bought the Criterion blu-ray and it’s just stunning. It’s clear to see the 2001: A Space Odyssey inspiration but Solaris is quite a different beast entirely. Jaws (1975) - 4/10 I really tried to get into this classic movie, but Jaws exhibits basically everything I don’t like about Steven Spielberg’s directing. For sure, the effects are crazily good but the story itself is poorly handled and largely uninteresting. It was just a massive slog to get through.

Darkman (1990) - 6/10 Sam Raimi’s superhero movie is so much fun, albeit massively stupid. Further discussion on Darkman can be found on episode 32 of The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast. Darkman II: The Return of Durant (1995) - 1/10 Abysmal. I forgot the movie as I watched it. This was part of a marathon my friends and I did for episode 32 of our podcast. Darkman III: Die Darkman Die (1996) - 1/10 Perhaps this trilogy is not so great after all. Only marginally better than Darkman II but still pretty terrible. More thoughts on episode 32 of my podcast. F For Fake (1973) - 8/10 Rewatching this proved to be a worthwhile decision. Albeit slightly boring, there’s no denying how crazy the story of this documentary about art forgers is. The standout however, is the director himself. Orson Welles makes a lot of this film about himself and how hot his girlfriend is and it is hilarious.

The Mitchells vs. The Machines (2021) - 4/10 More style over substance, Sony’s new animated adventure wants so much to be in trend with the current internet culture but it simply doesn’t understand what it’s emulating. There’s a nyan cat reference, for crying out loud. For every joke that works, there are about ten more that do not and were it not for the wonderful animation, it simply wouldn’t be getting so much praise. Taxi Driver (1976) - 10/10 The first movie I’ve seen in a cinema since 2020 and damn it was good to be back! I’ve already reviewed Taxi Driver in my March wrap-up but seeing it in the cinema was a real treat. Irreversible (2002) - 8/10 One of the most viscerally horrendous experiences I’ve ever had while watching a movie. I cannot believe a friend of mine gave me the DVD to watch. More thoughts on episode 32 of The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast. Don’t watch it with the family. The Golden Compass (2007) - 1/10 I had no recollection of this being as bad as it is. The Golden Compass is the definition of a factory mandated movie. Nothing it does on its own is worth any kind of merit. I would say, if you wanted an experience like what this tries to communicate, a better option by far is the BBC series, His Dark Materials. More of my thoughts can be found in the review I wrote on Letterboxd.

Antichrist (2009) - 8/10 Lars von Trier is nothing if not provocative and I can understand why someone would not like Antichrist, but I enjoyed it quite a lot. After watching it, I wrote a slightly disjointed summary of my interpretations of this highly metaphorical movie in the group chat, so fair warning for a bit of spoilers and graphic descriptions: It's like, the patriarchy, man! Oppression! Men are the rational thinkers with big brains and the women just cry and be emotional. So she's seen as crazy when she's smashing his cock and driving a drill through his leg to keep him weighted down. Like, how does he like it, ya know? So then she mutilates herself like she did with him and now they're both wounded, but the animals crowd around her (and the crow that he couldn't kill because it's Mother nature, not Father nature, duh). Then he kills her, even though she could've killed him loads of times but didn't. So it's like "haha big win for the man who was subjected to such horrific torture. Victory!" And then all the women with no faces come out of the woods because it's like a constant cycle. Manchester By The Sea (2016) - 6/10 Great performances in this super sad movie. I can’t say I got too much out of it though. Roar (1981) - 9/10 Watching Roar again was still as terrifying an experience as the first time. If you want to watch something that’s loose on plot with poor acting but with real big cats getting in the way of production and physically attacking people, look no further. This is the scariest movie I’ve ever seen because it’s all basically real. Cannot recommend it enough. Eyes Without A Face (1960) - 8/10 I’m glad I checked this old French movie out again. There’s a lot to marvel at in so many aspects, what with the premise itself - a mad surgeon taking the faces from unsuspecting women and transplanting them onto another - being incredibly unique for the time. Short, sweet and entertaining!

Se7en (1995) - 10/10 The first in a David Fincher marathon we did for The Sunday Movie Marathon, episode 33. Zodiac (2007) - 10/10 Second in the marathon, as it was getting late, we decided to watch half that evening and the last half on the following evening. Zodiac is a brilliant movie and you can hear more of my thoughts on the podcast (though I apologise; my audio is not the best in this episode). Gone Girl (2014) - 10/10 My favourite Fincher movie. More insights into this masterpiece in episode 33 of the podcast. Friends: The Reunion (2021) - 6/10 It was heartwarming to see the old actors for this great show together again. I talked about the Friends reunion film at length in episode 33 of my podcast.

Wolfwalkers (2020) - 10/10 I reviewed this in an earlier post but would like to reiterate just how wonderful Wolfwalkers is. If you get the chance, please see it in the cinema. I couldn’t stop crying from how beautiful it was. Raya and The Last Dragon (2021) - 6/10 After watching Wolfwalkers, I decided I didn’t want to go home. So I had lunch in town and booked a ticket for Disney’s Raya and The Last Dragon. A child was coughing directly behind me the entire time. Again, I reviewed this in an earlier post but generally it was decent but I have so many problems with the execution. The Princess Bride (1987) - 9/10 Clearly I underrated this the last time I watched it. The Princess Bride is warm and hilarious with some delightfully memorable characters. A real classic!

The Invisible Kid (1988) - 1/10 About as good as you’d expect a movie with that name to be, The Invisible Kid was a pick for The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast, the discussion for which you can listen to in episode 34. Babel (2006) - 9/10 The same night that I watched The Invisible Kid, I watched a masterful and dour drama from the director of Birdman and The Revenant. Babel calls back to an earlier movie of Iñárritu’s, called Amores Perros and as I was informed while we watched this for the podcast, it turns out Babel is part of a trilogy alongside the aforementioned film. More thoughts in episode 34 of the podcast. Snake Eyes (1998) - 1/10 After feeling thoroughly emotionally wiped out after Babel, we immediately watched another recommendation for the podcast: Snake Eyes, starring Nicolas Cage. This was a truly underwhelming experience and for more of a breakdown into what makes this movie so bad, you can listen to us talk about it on the podcast.

[stevengrantandmarcspector]

Since you asked for unhinged asks, send me to horny jail for Ammit knows I've sinned. After ep 3, I'm shipping Khonshu/Harrow, like, so much. I can't help picturing younger Ethan Hawke in all his twink glory, but also current Harrow and his dry af hair. idc I ship it so hard. They give me toxic divorced couple that hatefuck sometimes.

to each their own bestie, but i’m sending you straight to horny jail

ok but on another note, i think i could see a young harrow developing feelings for khonshu, y’know, him being all consumed in vengeance and enjoying the work khonshu had for him, but i think it was one-sided. my headcanon is that khonshu and ammit were together but split because of their obvious difference in perspective (i.e. ammit wants to punish people before they commit their crimes, khonshu wants punish people after) and after khonshu and arthur split, to hurt khonshu, he became ammit’s avatar. so they give toxic ex vibes because khonshu is literally talking to his batshit crazy ex via her avatar. that’s why hurting khonshu gave arthur so much satisfaction. it wasn’t just for the cause, it was for the rejection he faced from the god he loved and served who didn’t love him back the same way he wanted. it might also be why he treats marc and steven (and probably jake in the future) the way he does, he’s bitter at being replaced by someone younger and stronger and (in my opinion) more dear to khonshu than he was. 

sidenote: ethan hawke is always hot. he’s doing an incredible job playing arthur harrow, and i knew from the moment i saw him in gattaca when i was ten, it was love. i hate arthur but i love ethan as arthur. we stan ethan hawke on this blog!

laters gators!

[bonvoyagenoona]

i didn't realize how much i love almost/missed touches– only bc i didn't know what to call it LMAO so thank you for putting one of the BEST cliche things EVER that makes my heart go bum bum bum into words. you're a literary genius and ily

Hahaha aw, aren't they the best?! I cannot express the love I have for "retracts their hand". I might've used it like a million times in everything I've written, haha. Give me an eager hand retracting away like it's avoiding a hot stove -- I want that kind of steam heat and nervousness in a romance!

Now, if you wanna use the word "genius", use it with the likes of Richard Linklater, Julie Delpy, and Ethan Hawke in that scene / the Before trilogy!

They're just sitting and talking, but look at the staging! Look at how much they're conveying! Ahhh, the Before trilogy was a formative influence for me, for sure.

And the dialogue feels so natural, but every scene was so intentionally written and exhaustively rehearsed. I'm talking Robert Altman or Noah Baumbach or Phoebe Waller-Bridge-esque!

That's another thing that I'm a sucker for -- really complicated overlapping, musical dialogue that sounds and feels so natural, but is actually jam-packed with intentionality. Here's an example that Nerdwriter discusses. I especially love the part about rising and falling tones and what they convey! This is the kind of stuff we'd pick apart in case conceptualizations during clinical counseling training, and happening to have some sort of musical training just helps with hearing it, deriving meaning from it, and using it later to convey similar messages. In fact, when I write, I speak my dialogue aloud so that I know how to write it -- kinda like when you play an instrument to figure out how you want it to sound, and then transpose it to the staff on the page!

I just... I don't know if it necessarily comes through in the fics, but... I just love good, realistic dialogue so much!! It adds to the immersion because it feels like you're there, actually listening to them, actually speaking those words. Agh! Thank you for your kind words and this amazing question! My heart goes bum bum bum about this kind of stuff, too!

[fyrapartnersearch]

Seeking Literate Partners!

Disclaimer: Male authors, please stop contacting me. I've been burned too many times. If you persist, I'll ignore your message. Hello, you can call me Doe! I'm 25+ and a proud cat mom. I write multiple paragraphs/novella style (200-500+ words). I love to write detailed descriptions and delve into a character’s head/emotions as well as surroundings. I compare it to writing a novel together. I understand if the scene doesn’t have alot going on and therefore requires less like rapid fire. I adore having long, thoughtful replies where we truly immerse ourselves in the world. I'm hoping to find a partner whose as enthusiastic and passionate about the plot and writing as I am. When I get invested in a story, it’s 100% dedication. Getting a reply is the highlight of my day. I'm a big fan of romance and using face claims. I’m the type to make pinterest boards, spam you with gifs, headcanons, and send you songs that remind me of our characters and/or ship. I'll get excited if we come up with future plot ideas, or if our characters are being cute or angsty and I can yell about it in the chat. Last but not least I only do MxF (with myself in the female role) and don’t double, but I’m more than happy to write side characters of either gender to help move the story along. I'd highly prefer female authors writing male characters. Searching For - 21+ partners - For you to have an excellent grasp of grammar, punctuation, spelling, and capitalization. Both in character and out of character. (Literate to advanced writers only, please. I'm not looking for newbies or those who have English as their second/third language). - Plot before smut. While mature themes will be in my plots, and are even encouraged, there needs to be chemistry between our characters. I like to have a good mix of plot and tastefully written smut, along with doses of angst and fluff. - For you to write as an older man (40s+/50s+). I'm a sucker for the gruff and tough men with dark pasts who secretly have a soft heart. I also love those grumpy, hypermasculine men being intimidated by soft yet commanding women. The youngest I write is early 20s. - Please be enthusiastic and invested when it comes to plotting/worldbuilding. There’s nothing worse than receiving one sentence in reply to two paragraphs of ideas, or having a doormat partner who says “sure” to whatever I ask. Tossing ideas back and forth, watching them snowball into amazing plot threads brings me joy. - Joining me in the wonderful world of ship/character development is kind of a must. It’s one of the things that makes writing with a partner so much fun. I also like to make friends with my partners! - While I'd prefer real life face claims, I'd also be open to using realistic art if you're uncomfortable with real life. I draw the line at anime/cartoon art. Faces I'd love to write as: gal gadot, rooney mara, ruth negga, saoirse ronan, sophie turner, jessica chastain, jennifer morrison, mia wasikowska, natalia dyer, brit marling, deborah ann woll, mackenzie davis, emmy rossum, adria adjora, chyler leigh, hayley bennet, tashi rodriguez, lily james, cara delevingne, maya hawke, katheryn winnick, elizabeth olsen, abigal cowen, sophia lillis lauren cohan, zoey deutsch, paulina singer, crystal reed, hayley lu richardson, ask about others Faces I'd love to write against: jeffery dean morgan, hugh jackman, robert taylor, jr bourne, jon bernthal, jason issacs, anthony varrecchiah, brett tucker, david harbour, frank grillo, iain glen, josh duhamel, patrick petitjean, ethan hawke, christian bale, rory mccann, younger sam elliot, titus welliver, viggo mortensen, joel miller (illustrated face), ask about others If you've made it this far, thank you! You won't be disappointed in writing with me. I tend to be online daily and while I'd like it if you were too, I understand that real life things comes first. Let me know if you're going to be inactive/can’t continue. If you suddenly stop replying ic and ooc, I'll drop the story after 2 attempts of gauging continued interest spaced a week apart. Below are genres and pairings I love. Feel free to combine as many as you'd like and I’m sure we can come up with something great! Current cravings are in bold. Two thing I don't do are slice of life and historical plots. Genres: - crimes in remote locations - spooky small towns - post apocalyptic/dystopia - supernatural/modern fantasy (A/B/O, werewolves, shapeshifters, alpha x rival pack alpha's child, werewolf x shifter, alpha x new werewolf, involuntary mate-bond, mating/claiming) - southern/mid western gothic - murder mystery (small town or big city) - modern/dark fairy tale retellings - sci-fi - cyberpunk/retro-futuristic - little coastal towns or little towns in the mountains - emotionally charged/dark and gritty - superpowers/gifted - unresolved sexual tension/slow burn - redemption - pacific northwest - suburban gothic - luring to the other side - reincarnation/multiple universes - western inspired + modern day (such as longmire) - christmas inspired - culture clash/two characters from different sides Pairings: - age gaps (older man x younger woman / 15 to 25+ year gap) - enemies to lovers/villain x heroine - cop x criminal - doctor x patient - friends turned lovers/pining - grumpy x sunshine - the broken man x the woman that becomes his light - fbi agents/cop partners - dark hearted man melting for the innocent woman - friend x best friend’s older sibling - boss x employee - neighbors - single father x friend - firefighter/cop x victim - mentor x mentee - hurt/comfort - height differences - pet names (sweetheart, baby girl, kid, kiddo) - lady and the tramp esque/class difference - creature x human/creature - ex-con x anyone - bodyguard x assignment - widow/er falling in love again - biker x civilian - rancher/mountain man x city girl - affair (with so's sibling, with so's friend, with neighbor) - hitman x target - serial killer x fbi agent - soul mates - experienced x inexperienced - local x vacationer - injured/scarred warrior washed out from their former glory x royal/heir-to-be (modern day / Sansa x Sandor inspired) - friend x best friend/boyfriend's father - daughter in law x father in law - park ranger x camper - bounty hunter x bounty - power imbalances Tropes/Themes: the papa wolf/hot dads, cultured badass, jerk with a heart of gold. ladykiller in love, mountain man, mysterious protector, southern gentleman, tall, dark, and handsome, knight in sour armor, red string of fate, villain takes an interest, porcelain to ivory to steel, when person a gets injured/kidnapped and person b goes absolutely feral to save them, cowboys tiny women and big men, the monster being treated gently for the first time in his life, two characters forced into positions where they have no choice but to reconcile their differences and grow together/trust each other, forbidden relationships, trying to escape childhood demons & reuniting in adulthood Fandoms: (I don't write canons or do canon x oc) Star Wars, X Files, Haven, Fringe, Stranger Things, Heroes, The Wolf Among Us, Mercy Thompson Series, True Blood, Marvel, The OA, Disney personified, His Dark Materials, Beastars, Horizon Zero Dawn, The Last of Us, Cyberpunk 2077 Plot Ideas: I have too many to list here but take a look at my google doc and let me know if anything catches your attention. It's a mix of fandom inspired and original plots: Plot Ideas Last but not least, I have a list of kinks if anyone's interested. I use email and discord to write. I'd also be open to joining a jcink site! Contact me at Doe#3347 on discord or by email: doeeyes73@gmail.com Please be detailed when you message me, let me know why you chose to contact me. Seeing only "hey do you wanna rp?" is a guaranteed way to turn me off. Look forward to hearing from you!

[trulyinspiringmovies]

The Purge

“The Purge” is a frustrating movie to watch because of its idiotic characters and the waste of a decent concept.

James Sandin is a wealthy man whose occupation is to sell home security systems to protect people from The Purge. The Purge is an annual government-sanctioned night where all crime is legal for 12 hours. James and his family are fortunate enough to have the luxury of safely barricading themselves at home and relaxing while they wait for the Purge to be over. When a homeless man comes running into their affluent neighborhood screaming for help, James’s son lets him into the safety of their home. This attracts the attention of a group of upper-class killers who wants to purge the homeless man. They threaten the Sandin's to release him or else they will come in and kill everyone. Now the Sandin's must find this man in their home before it’s too late.

I remember watching this movie as a teenager and thinking it was dumb. Now that I’m older and have seen more movies, I realize that this movie is even dumber than I initially thought. I’d say the only redeeming quality of this movie was the performance of Ethan Hawke. Even though he had very little to work with, he still gave a good performance. The rest of this movie is littered with hot garbage. For starters, I thought the writing in the movie was absolutely abysmal. The dialogue felt half-baked and I could only imagine the script looked like an edgy teen wrote it. The children in this movie are infuriatingly moronic. The son is portrayed to be a smart kid because he creates this cool invention. Then, when he’s helping the homeless man, he throws logic out the window as he’s lowering the barricades, endangering his entire family. He just makes choices throughout the whole film that had me scratching my head. It was as if he was intentionally trying to get his whole family killed. It made me less sympathetic for the kid and more indifferent to whether or not he got killed. I know he helps out the homeless man because it’s a moment of compassion, but doing so meant the complete disregard for the well-being of his own family. To make things worse, no one in the family ever scolds him for endangering the entire family. It’s endlessly frustrating to never see the kid be explained why what he did was wrong and dumb. The daughter has very little to do in this film. She has a boyfriend who doesn’t have her father’s approval, but he’s killed pretty early in the movie’s runtime, so she’s just sad the whole movie. I feel like there could’ve been potential with the boyfriend. Using the lockdown for the Purge was actually a good idea to force James to listen to what he had to say. The movie could’ve had the boyfriend try to reason with James. Maybe by the end of the movie, James could have his mind changed and start approving of the relationship. Maybe it could’ve gone the opposite direction and once the boyfriend knew James would never change his mind, he would then try to kill him, preferably at the height of the climax of the film to add more tension. Instead, he dies so the daughter could be sad and make dumb decisions. She’s also frustrating to watch because her sadness clouds her judgment in a life or death situation. She’ll be talking to her mother while there’s a random homeless man with a knife lurking in the shadows of their house and then leave the group to be alone because she’s sad. This movie was more of an action movie than it was a horror movie. During the action scenes, one of the main characters would be pinned down and ready to be executed, only for someone off-screen to shoot the bad guy. It happens so often that I would count down when the shots would be fired. The mysterious gang of rich kids was so cliché. They would wear masks and stare into the security camera while doing ‘creepy’ things like wielding a knife, pushing one another on swings, and motioning a bullet to the head. I could just imagine these idiots breathing heavily in their masks just coming up with the most cliché poses to do and thinking to themselves, “Oh man, I bet I’m being so scary right now!”. This movie has potential that wasn’t explored. For brief moments, there would be news anchors talking about how the Purge affects people of different classes and statuses unfairly. Then, it’s never mentioned again. The commentary goes only as deep as the rich kids want to kill the homeless guy because they dehumanize him. And the concept of the Purge is something I could jump on board with. What I can’t suspend my disbelief for is the fact no one thinks the Purge is horrible. Everyone talks about it like it’s what saved America. No one is of the opinion that maybe all this violence isn’t justified. The ending of this movie is absolute garbage. The motivations for the twist were so clear and surface-level that I saw it coming a mile away. It doesn’t really tie in with the plot that was going on, so it felt disjointed. They try to explain that it’s because the neighbors saw that their defenses were down, but that’s an extremely loose reason. I don’t understand how a movie like this could get so many sequels. Maybe it’s because people still believe in the concept and maybe the concept gets explored more thoroughly in future installments. Hopefully, it does. Still, the first movie in this franchise was underwhelming and squandered its potential.

★★

Rewatched on July 5th, 2021

[birdlord]

Everything I Watched in 2020

We’ll start with movies. The number in parentheses is the year of release, asterisks denote a re-watch, and titles in bold are my favourite watches of the year. Here’s 2019’s list. 

01 Little Women (19)

02 The Post (17) 

03 Molly’s Game (17)

04 * Doctor No (62)

05 Groundhog Day (93)

06 *Star Trek IV - The Voyage Home (86)

07 Knives Out (19) My last theatre experience (sob)

08 Professor Marston and his Wonder Women (17)

09 Les Miserables (98)

10 Midsommar (19) I’m not sure how *good* it is, but it does stick in the ol’ brain

11 *Manhattan Murder Mystery (93)

12 Marriage Story (19)

13 Kramer vs Kramer (79)

14 Jojo Rabbit (19)

15 J’ai perdu mon corps (19) a cute animated film about a hand detached from its body!

16 1917 (19)

17 Married to the Mob (88)

18 Klaus (19)

19 Portrait of a Lady on Fire (19) If Little Women made me want to wear a scarf criss-crossed around my torso, this one made me want to wear a cloak

20 The Last Black Man in San Francisco (19)

21 *Lawrence of Arabia (62)

22 Gone With the Wind (39)

23 Kiss Me Deadly (55)

24 Dredd (12)

25 Heartburn (86) heard a bunch about this one in the Blank Check series on Nora Ephron, sadly after I’d watched it

26 The Long Shot (19)

27 Out of Africa (85)

28 King Kong (46)

29 *Johnny Mnemonic (95)

30 Knocked Up (07)

31 Collateral (04)

32 Bird on a Wire (90)

33 The Black Dahlia (05)

34 Long Time Running (17)

35 *Magic Mike (12)

36 Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead (07)

37 Cold War (18)

38 *Kramer Vs Kramer (79) yes I watched this a few months before! This was a pandemic friend group co-watch.

39 *Burn After Reading (08)

40 Last Holiday (50)

41 Fly Away Home (96)

42 *Moneyball (11) I’m sure I watch this every two years, at most??

43 Last Holiday (06) the Queen Latifah version of the 1950 movie above, lacking, of course, the brutal “poor people don’t deserve anything good” ending

44 *Safe (95)

45 Gimme Shelter (70)

46 The Daytrippers (96)

47 Experiment in Terror (62)

48 Tucker: The Man and His Dream (88)

49 My Brilliant Career (79) one of the salvations of 2020 was watching movies “with” friends. Our usual method was to video chat before the movie, sync our streaming services, and text-chat while the movie was on. 

50 Divorce Italian Style (61)

51 *Gosford Park (01) another classic comfort watch, fuck I love a G. Park

52 Hopscotch (80)

53 Brief Encounter (45)

54 Hud (63)

55 Ocean’s 8 (18)

56 *Beverly Hills Cop (84)

57 Blow the Man Down (19)

58 Constantine (05)

59 The Report (19) maddening!! How are people so consistently terrible to one another!

60 Everyday People (04)

61 Anatomy of a Murder (58)

62 Spiderman: Homecoming (17)

63 *To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar (95) Of the 90s drag road movies, Priscilla is more visually striking, but this has its moments.

64 Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me (92)

65 *The Truman Show (98)

66 Mona Lisa (86)

67 The Blob (58)

68 The Guard (11)

69 *Waiting for Guffman (96) RIP Fred Willard

70 Rocketman (19)

71 Outside In (18)

72 The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (08) how strange to see a movie that you have known the premise for, but no details of, for over a decade

73 *Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country (91)

74 The Reader (08)

75 Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (19) This was fine until it VERY MUCH WAS NOT FINE

76 The End of the Affair (99) you try to watch a fun little romp about infidelity during the Blitz, and Graham Greene can’t help but shoehorn in a friggin crisis of religious faith

77 Must Love Dogs (05) barely any dog content, where are the dogs at

78 The Rainmaker (97)

79 *Batman & Robin (97)

80 National Lampoon’s Vacation (83) Never seen any of the non-xmas Vacations, didn’t realize the children are totally different, not just actors but ages! Also, this one is blatantly racist!

81 *Mystic Pizza (88)

82 Funny Girl (68)

83 The Sons of Katie Elder (65)

84 *Knives Out (19) another re-watch within the same year!! How does this keep happening??

85 *Scott Pilgrim Vs The World (10) a real I-just-moved-away-from-Toronto nostalgia watch

86 Canadian Bacon (92) vividly recall this VHS at the video store, but I never saw it til 2020

87 *Blood Simple (85)

88 Brittany Runs a Marathon (19)

89 The Accidental Tourist (88)

90 August Osage County (13) MELO-DRAMA!!

91 Appaloosa (08)

92 The Firm (93) Feeling good about how many iconic 80s/90s video store stalwarts I watched in 2020

93 *Almost Famous (00)

94 Whisper of the Heart (95)

95 Da 5 Bloods (20)

96 Rain Man (88)

97 True Stories (86)

98 *Risky Business (83) It’s not about what you think it’s about! It never was!

99 *The Big Chill (83)

100 The Way We Were (73)

101 Safety Last (23) It’s getting so that I might have to add the first two digits to my dates...not that I watch THAT many movies from the 1920s...

102 Phantasm (79)

103 The Burrowers (08)

104 New Jack City (91)

105 The Vanishing (88)

106 Sisters (72)

107 Puberty Blues (81) Little Aussie cinema theme, here

108 Elevator to the Gallows (58)

109 Les Diaboliques (55)

110 House (77) haha WHAT no really W H A T

111 Death Line (72)

112 Cranes are Flying (57)

113 Holes (03)

114 *Lady Vengeance (05)

115 Long Weekend (78)

116 Body Double (84)

117 The Crazies (73) I love that Romero shows the utter confusion that would no doubt reign in the case of any kind of disaster. Things fall apart.

118 Waterlilies (07)

119 *You’re Next (11)

120 Event Horizon (97)

121 Venom (18) I liked it, guys, way more than most superhero fare. Has a real sense of place and the place ISN’T New York!

122 Under the Silver Lake (18) RIP Night Call

123 *Blade Runner (82)

124 *The Birds (62) interesting to see now that I’ve read the story it came from

125 *28 Days Later (02) hits REAL FUCKIN’ DIFFERENT in a pandemic

126 Life is Sweet (90)

127 *So I Married an Axe Murderer (93) find me a more 90s movie, I dare you (it’s not possible)

128 Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner (67)

129 The Pelican Brief (93) 90s thrillers continue!

130 Dick Johnston is Dead (20)

131 The Bridges of Madison County (95)

132 Earth Girls are Easy (88) Geena Davis and Jeff Goldblum are so hot in this movie, no wonder they got married 

133 Better Watch Out (16)

134 Drowning Mona (00) trying for something like the Coen bros and not getting there

135 Au Revoir Les Enfants (87)

136 *Chasing Amy (97) Affleck is the least alluring movie lead...ever? I also think I gave Joey Lauren Adams’ character short shrift in my memory of the movie. It’s not good, but she’s more complicated than I recalled. 

137 Blackkklansman (18)

138 Being Frank (19)

139 Kiki’s Delivery Service (89)

140 Uncle Frank (20) why so many FRANKS

141 *National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (89) watching with pals (virtually) made it so much more fun than the usual yearly watch!

142 Half Baked (98) another, more secret Toronto nostalgia pic - RC Harris water filtration plant as a prison!

143 We’re the Millers (13)

144 All is Bright (13)

145 Defending Your Life (91)

146 Christmas Chronicles (18) I maintain that most new xmas movies are terrible, particularly now that Netflix churns them out like eggnog every year. 

147 Spiderman: Into the Spider-Verse (18)

148 Reindeer Games (00) what did I say about Affleck??!? WHAT DID I SAY

149 Palm Springs (20)

150 Happiest Season (20)

151 *Metropolitan (90) it’s definitely a Christmas movie

152 Black Christmas (74)

THEATRE:HOME - 2:150 (thanks pandemic)

I usually separate out docs and fiction, but I watched almost no documentaries this year (with the exception of Dick Johnston). Reality is real enough. 

TV Series

01 - BoJack Horseman (final season) - Pretty damned poignant finish to the show, replete with actual consequences for our reformed bad boy protagonist (which is more than you can say for most antiheroes of Peak TV).

02 - *Hello Ladies - I enjoy the pure awkwardness of seeing Stephen Merchant try to perform being a Regular Person, but ultimately this show tips him too far towards a nasty, Ricky Gervais-lite sort of persona. Perhaps he was always best as a cameo appearance, or lip synching with wild eyes while Chrissy Teigen giggles?

03 - Olive Kittredge - a rough watch by times. I read the book as well, later in the year. Frances Mcdormand was the best, possibly the only, casting option for the flinty lead. One episode tips into thriller territory, which is a shock. 

04 - *The Wire S3, S4, S5 - lockdown culture! It was interesting to rewatch this, then a few months later go through an enormous, culture-level reappraisal of cop-centred narratives. 

05 - Forever - a Maya Rudolph/Fred Armisen joint that coasts on the charm of its leads. The premise is OK, but I wasn’t left wanting any more at the end. 

06 - *Catastrophe - a rewatch when my partner decided he wanted to see it, too!

07 - Red Oak - resolutely “OK” steaming dramedy, relied heavily on some pretty obvious cues to get across its 1980s setting. 

08 - Little Fires Everywhere - gulped this one down while in 14-day isolation, delicious! Every 90s suburban mom had that SUV, but not all of them had the requisite **secrets**

09 - The Great - fun historical comedy/drama! Costumes: lush. Actors: amusing. Race-blind casting: refreshing!

10 - The Crown S4 - this is the season everyone lost their everloving shit for, since it’s finally recent enough history that a fair chunk of the viewing audience is liable to recall it happening. 

11 - Ted Lasso - we resisted this one for a while (thought I did enjoy the ad campaign for NBC sports (!!) that it was based on). My view is that its best point was the comfort that the men on the show have (or develop, throughout the season) with the acknowledgement and sharing of their own feelings. Masculinity redux. 

12 - Moonbase 8 - Goodnatured in a way that makes you certain they will be crushed. 

13 - The Good Lord Bird - Ethan Hawke is really aging into the character actor we always hoped he would be! 

14 - Hollywood - frothy wish-fulfillment alternate history. I think the show would have been improved immeasurably by skipping the final episode.