#etc etc etc. way more interesting. if you ask me

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Captain's Orders 1

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, controlling behaviour, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: The Captain takes it upon himself to change your life.

Characters: Steve Rogers

Note: I am still dizzy her and there but feeling a bit better.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

You wouldn’t call it doom scrolling. That’s not what this is. You try not to search out the depressing headlines or the studies of the human character assuring you of your race’s inherent flaws. Yet, all those boastful posts about engagements, weddings, and promotions still make you feel crummy. 

Jealous? Sure. You don’t have any of those things and it isn’t as if you can hope for as much, either. You’re in a dead-end job, living in cramped apartment with your sister and her irresponsible friend, and your romantic life is next to non-existent; not that you’ve been looking. None of that is meant for you, otherwise, you’d have had some glimmer of interest by now. 

It’s like quicksand. Not very quick but it pulls you down lower and lower. Sinking and sinking until all you can see is the muck. There’s no way out now, you’re waist deep in it. 

You click under your favourite communities and start a new post. You don’t make many. Mostly you read and judge silently. You’re a lurker. Like in many facets of your life. You watch, you don’t do. But you’ve had a shitty day and you need to just let it out. 

Your fingers move as your thoughts boil in your head; your nagging manager, your lazy landlord, and your immature roommates. Nothing ever goes your way. Everyone else has it figured out and you’re just left to rot. You try! You do. Resumes, profiles on friendship apps, online courses; free, of course, it’s all you can afford, but you do try to improve yourself. It just doesn’t work. 

You hit ‘post’ and close the lid of your ancient laptop. It’s as thick as a book. The battery doesn’t hold a charge and the fan is as loud as a jet. You fall back onto your bed and look around your tiny room. That’s all you have. This space is as much as you can call your own and not really. You rent it, it can be taken away with one of those red stamped notices. 

You yawn and drag yourself up. A whole shift and you didn’t bother to have more than the bland break room coffee spewed from the off-brand pod machine and a couple sticks of gum. Tia got herself sushi before her shift but she can just ask her parents to send her money to cover her Door Dash addiction. 

You plod out to the kitchen. Your sister closes the fridge and cracks the tab of a beer can. You’re sure it isn’t her first.  

“I didn’t hear you come in,” Shea bobbles her head. 

Funny since Donna pretty much hollered at you for interrupting her TV show. You all pitched in on the flat screen yet it’s never your turn with it. You shrug and go to the cupboard. It’s not sushi but the spicy shrimp ramen isn’t too bad... 

“You work?” You ask. 

“Pfft, no. Didn’t I say I was going to lunch with Mason?” 

“Did you?” You take down at bowl. She probably did. You never remember. She’s always got a date or a party or a fall back. If she can’t make rent, she’ll smile a cute guy and get some money. 

“He bought me some shoes! You’ll never believe.” 

“Right,” you try not to seethe. 

You’re scraping the bottom of the barrel. You’re eating sodium-laced noodles and holding back tears against old people wanting to print out their life story from a corrupt PDF. She’s pretty. She doesn’t have to try. Shea is all the proof you need that some people are just lucky. 

You put the electric kettle onto boil and the smell of burnt—something makes your lip curl. You pop the lid and look inside. It’s brown. What the hell? 

“What’s wrong with this?” You ask as you flip off the switch. 

“Donna!” Shea yells, “what did you do to the kettle?” No answer. Your sister hollers again. 

A door swings open and Donna stomps out with a huff. Her face is green as she has a mask spread over it and eye masks pasted beneath her lashes. 

“I’m getting ready--” 

“The kettle stinks,” you reach for a pot and find none. They’re all stacked and waiting to be washed. You snatch one off the top and flip on the faucet. 

“Oh, I heated up some bone broth in it. I’m doing a cleanse,” she smirks. “Tasted kinda weird.” 

“Bone broth?” You scoff. See. You try, they can’t even clean dishes. “Great.” 

“I’m sure it’s fine, just rinse it out,” Shea says. 

You scrub the pan and ignore her. You glance up as she slurps noisily from the can. Pre-drinks. Her and Donna are going out. Again. They can afford to because they don’t buy their own drinks. They don’t need to. You went out with them once and paid for all of your own, even though you’d have been happy enough with a single round. 

“Have fun,” you dry out the pan and slam it on the burner. 

“Jeez, maybe you should loosen up?” Donna chides. 

“Yeah, come with us. Dance it out,” Shea drawls. 

“No thanks,” you twist the knob and light the burner. “I have work tomorrow.” 

“Call innnnn,” Shea insists. 

“I can’t,” you sniff and step back to wait for the water to boil. 

“Boring,” she chirps. 

“Yep, I am,” you cross your arms. Your annoyed. When the go out, you’ll have to clean up this mess. You can’t handle another bout of fruit flies. 

You put the noodles in and let them soften. You stir in the oil and powder then retreat to your room with the bowl of boiling cholesterol. You let it cool and put a video on your phone. You don’t want to think. 

You eat deliberately. You savour the processed flavouring. You can’t go out sneak a midnight snack; Donna ate all your cookies. You label all your stuff in thick marker and she apparently can’t read. 

You hear them leave. They’re loud. They leave the television on. At high volume. 

You go out and shut it off. You need to sleep soon. Opening always comes after a late shift. Otherwise, how else would the corporation keep you disempowered. 

You open your laptop. You’ll but on some lo-fi while you charge your phone. Heck, the fan is like white noise on its own. 

The little red number at the bottom of the page stops you. You left the browser open. Someone actually responded to your post. You click and your stomach drops as you read the first sentence. 

‘Sounds like you cause a lot of your own problems. Maybe try some mindful exercises and get out more. You should also consider making some friends.’ 

You read it over and over. You’re angry. Hurt, too. But most that first thing. You can’t stop from replying. 

‘You got all that from me venting? I wasn’t asking for advice. I walk to and from work and I have friends.’ 

It’s mostly true. You do walk. Most days. And your sister is a friend, isn’t she? By association, so is Donna. 

Before you can look up your favourite twelve-hour lo-fi, another notification pops up. 

‘Looking at your post history, your diet could use some improvements. More veggies. And walking is a good starting point but you need to increase your endorphins. I’d be happy to send you some helpful guides. They’re easily searchable on the internet. We live in the age of information, you should consider taking advantage of that.’ 

Wow, what an asshole. He’s smug and obviously better than you. You click on his username and scroll through. Just as you expect. He posts in fitness communities. Not any videos of him but sharing tutorials and recipes for high-protein smoothies and fibre-laced juices. He wouldn’t know flavour if it puked in his mouth. 

You his ‘esc’ and go back to your own post; ‘thanks for the advice. Have a good one.; 

That’s it. You’re not arguing with some faceless douche on the internet. His response is as quick as the first. 

‘A helpful link.’ He hyperlinks the words. ‘You should at least stretch in the morning and go outside on your breaks at work. You might work long shifts but it’s no excuse to be lazy. If you’ve been in that role for so long, you should have more than enough references to move on to something that doesn’t make you miserable.’ 

You don’t answer. You know if you do, you’ll just embarrass yourself. Judging by the few pics of his real life and his cadence, he’s got everything. He just thinks it’s a matter of mindset. There can’t possibly be anything else which could make things more difficult for people. You just don’t work hard enough. Duh, everyone always says so. 

You close out of the page. If he replies again, you’ll block him. Simple as. You put on a lo-fi track and dim the screen. You roll over and tuck into bed. You fall asleep in a ball of stress; you have to wake up, shower, do all that human stuff, then make yourself face another eight hours of hell. 

⭐

“I hate working at the fucking copy desk,” you hiss as you take your bag from the cubby in the break room. “Good luck.” 

Darcy gives you a look as she sits at one of the tables, waiting for her shift to start. You grit your teeth as you should your purse and grip your jacket tight. You punch your employee number into the clock then head out. 

As you march down the aisle of toner, a customer tries to stop you. “I’m off duty.” 

“But I need a keyboard.” 

You ignore them and keep going. 

“I’m going to tell a manager, young lady!” 

You don’t care. Besides, why are they looking for a keyboard in the toner aisle. The signs above with the giant letters clearly show that the computer accessories are in the opposite corner. 

People are stupid. They might be able to read, technically, but they definitely lack comprehension. Just like Donna who can’t keep her hands off your snacks. 

You walk home in a simmer. If you let your temper get away from you, you won’t be able to hold back when you walk into the inevitable shit show waiting for you at home. Shea and Donna hungover, probably having got into more of your sparse groceries, and amidst a brand new mess for you to tidy. You won’t not this time. 

You have a mission. Go to your room and don’t come out. 

As you enter your building, you find the elevator non-responsive. A tiny post-it is stuck to the doors. ‘Out of Order’. Couldn’t have made something a bit more legible? 

You take the stairs. The hallway smells like onion and dirty clothes. You take out your keys as you get to your door, ignoring the rabble coming from the apartment next to yours. Before you can get your key in the slot, the door opens. 

“Heyyyy, she’s back,” Shea greets. You blink at her in confusion. Is she already drunk again? 

“Starting already?” You ask as you try to get past her. 

“Hm, no,” she says tritely, “you have a guest.” 

You roll your eyes, “don’t be a bitch, alright?” 

“No, really,” she grins. You stop and look her up and down. She isn’t falling apart like usual after a Friday night. Her hair is done, her makeup too, and she’s not in her sweats.  

“Is it mom?” You whisper. 

She snorts, “you’re stupid. No, it’s your friend. Steve.” She backs up with a shimmy, “I think some people call him Captain.” 

You make a face. What? 

“Who...” 

“Ahem,” a figure appears by the corner of the kitchen counter, “I didn’t mean to intrude.” 

You crane to see over Shea’s shoulder. The man behind her is tall. And familiar. Steve Rogers. Your expression contorts as your lashes flutter in confusion. 

“Not at all, Stevie,” Shea spins, “I’ll give you two the room. So nice to meet you.” 

She squeezes by him and touches his forearm as she does. He doesn’t react. She giggles and flits off. Her door shuts but you can tell that the latch didn’t catch. She’s listening. 

“Should we go outside? Get some sun?” He asks. 

You glance at him again. You’re lost. 

“Do I know you?” You grimace. 

“After all day under fluorescent, you should really get out--” 

“I-- I’m sorry, can you slow down and explain--” 

“Outside. Privately,” he says. 

You peek past him then look into the hallway behind you. You search your mind for an explanation. The only place you know him from is the internet or a history book. 

“Like I said before, going outside can really help with mood issues.” 

You hesitate and your mouth falls open. It can’t be... 

“Was that you? Last night?” You shake your head. 

“How about I buy you a smoothie?” He offers. 

You snap your mouth shut. He can’t be serious. This can’t be real. 

[wonysugar]

g!p sugar mommy giselle🫦🫦🫦

g!p.... sugar mommy...... giselle..... ANON. holds you by the neck dearly thank you for this. also! it’s barely even mentioned at all but just know giselle is like 37ish and reader is in her mid-twenties. :]

cw : age-gap!

giselle as the sugar mommy you randomly met on your day to day minimum wage job at a fast food place MHMMM LET ME COOKKK..... having her be a regular who always comes in like once a week, always wearing something super fancy.. like a black prada trenchcoat or sometimes even a dolce & gabbana blazer. point is, she immediately stuck out like a sore thumb among the rest of the crowd.

plus, you found her undeniably gorgeous as soon as you laid eyes on her, so it's not like she'd go unnoticed otherwise, either.

she often approached you at the register and made small talk, as stupid as it often was. she'd find some stupid excuse not to use the self checkout machine and would find a lame conversation starter while you're watching her pull out a dior purse, proceeding with the payment of her order. that often lead to you asking her questions of your own.

"why do you eat here? you look like you have other.... better places to be eating at."

she'd chuckle at your words, finding them amusing, before answering in a gentle tone, "trust me, i do. my niece doesn't seem to think the same way i do, however, as she seems to really like this place. i appear to be the only one indulging her."

soon enough, you'd warm up to her with each visit of hers and the conversations would get much, much longer. so much so that, often times, your manager would have to step in and remind you to get back to work prompty. it got annoying quickly, as the conversations were just getting good; chatting about studies, travel plans, ambitions and goals, etc.

so, wanting to have these incredibly interesting exchanges in a more comfortable and relaxed setting, aeri asked for your number.

naturally.

who cares that she was like, ten years older than you. it wouldn’t hurt to make a friend… right?

numerous nights of friendly-texting-turned-flirty later, you two quickly agreed on a set date and location, which turned out to be a friday evening spent in the very expensive restaurant right across the block from your workplace. it was a date! she informed you to come in 'appropriate' attire, whatever that meant. how would you know? your closet consisted of hoodies, sweaters and some t-shirts as well as your work uniform. that being said, you showed up to the date wearing a low cute dark blue dress you found laying around in the darkest depths of your drawer for probably more than seven years. saying you were nervous would be nothing but a huge understatement.

she, on the other hand, came wearing a creamy white turtleneck under the black trench-coat she was usually seen wearing when ordering food at your job, the look topped off by wide legged black pants and really expensive looking black leather heels.

what the fuck are you doing.

getting cold feet, you nervously sat down at the table and bowed your head in her direction. intimidated by the light yet impacting amount of makeup she had on her face, you avoided eye contact as much as possible. she was breathtaking.

she told you to choose whatever you’d like on the menu and to not look at the price, as she insisted you not to worry at all about the bill. you, of course, felt guilty so you proceeded to pick the least expensive thing on the menu and attempted to convince her that you genuinely loved the dish, hence why you’d pick it among everything else.

who were you kidding though, you couldn’t even pronounce whatever fuckass french name it was that you picked to the waiter. she smiled at you as you finished ordering, making you turn red in embarrassment.

“you know y/n, i couldn’t bring myself to mention it in a place as unflattering as your workplace, no offence,” she started as you shook off the statement, practically agreeing with her before she continued, “but i must say that i think you are absolutely adorable.”

it gets to a point. and at this point you’re just short-circuiting at her words and intense eye contact, finding it difficult to even act properly in front of her!

she noticed that, of course, especially in times during the conversation where she called you endearing names such as “darling”, “love” and “honey”.

that wasn’t much different in bed, either.

as it turns out, you really did want her to fuck you at the end of the night! honestly, how could you not when she’d been opening every single door for you, insisting on paying for the entirety of the bill at the restaurant and offering to drive you home despite it only being a 10 minute walk?

she’d done nothing but drive you crazy all evening with her sexy and gentle manners, it’s only natural you gave her a sloppy handjob whilst she drove her grey lexus lx back to her own house with the pure intention of fucking the shit out of you.

…and she did! very well, at that!

two of her fingers deep into you, she circled your clit with her thumb and left gentle kisses on your jaw down to your collarbone. slow and steady pumps of the digits, she thrived in hearing your soft whimpers.

that didn’t last long, however. she was getting impatient, and her dick was aching to feel you.

ass up face down, you’re getting pounded relentlessly into the mattress before you know it. getting treated like nothing but a queen all night only to be later fucked like a depraved slut�� it had to be the best thing you’d ever felt in a while. of course, you let her know of that with guttural moans that left your body with each thrust of her cock. she didn’t care, her house was big enough to muffle your screams, after all.

she whispered obscenities into your ear whilst you did so, gripping a fistful of your hair and humming at each sound that came out of your mouth. talking about how tight your cunt was for her, about how good it felt, how she couldn’t wait to use it every other day, about how she would kill to take care of a pretty little thing like you.

gripping onto your sides and ramming into you shamelessly as she drove you to your climax, you bit your lip until you felt like it was bleeding. her breathier heavier and each of her moans slightly higher than the previous, you both orgasmed together, a wave of euphoria washing over the two of you immediately.

oh and, you know what she said about ‘taking care of a pretty little thing like you?’ yeah, she meant every word.

soon enough, she’s taking you on dates every other weekend, referring you to a slightly better paying, less agonizing job thanks to the connections she possesses, sending you excessive amounts of money she labels as your ‘monthly allowance’ and overall spoiling you with whatever your heart desires. hell. she even payed your university tuition! she finds it endearing to see you always so shy and embarrassed to accept the money she gives you; you always go on about how ‘you don’t give her anything back’ and how it isn’t fair.

but to her, you do give back. your happiness and joy is what aeri does it for, and you give her great amounts of that. not only that, but you also give back by whoring yourself out and looking pretty for her. giving her unwarranted boners by sending her risky pictures and videos while she’s at work, having you wear the lingerie she buys you, knowing you use the toys she got you whenever she’s too busy to take care of you, etc. aeri could name nothing better than having you be the beautiful doll she gets to play with every now and then. :]

[vandme12]

This has been rotting in my head for so long, how would the KC cast react to a powerful figure Mc? Ronin added mc because he just thought they were a writer needing inspiration, but what if they were actually a big influential figure in politics, media etc? Maybe they’ve hired Misaki before to get rid of someone? Maybe V knows them from charity meetings? How would it all unfold?

I really loved writing this! Whoever asked, Please ask me more head canons! The concept, would be they're a powerful "person" who usually gets people to kill off "bad" people! This is my longest head canon!

Ronin Beaufort!

At first, you were just a fun little distraction. Some writer looking for inspiration in the darkest parts of the world? Yeah, yeah, he’s heard that one before. But you were flirty, sharp, and a little too comfortable around him, which made you interesting.

So, he let you stick around. Took you to some bloody, brutal places, spun his words like knives, toyed with you just to see if you’d flinch.

But you didn’t.

You kept up. You even pushed back.

And damn it, he loved that.

You made things fun.

So fun, in fact, that he didn’t question it. Didn’t stop to wonder how you were able to navigate his world so easily, how you had this natural charisma that could turn heads, how your words carried weight in a way that felt… important.

He didn’t put the pieces together—until he saw your face on the news.

He’s at some dive bar, half-watching the TV, when he sees it. Some big political scandal. Some business shake-up. And right there, center screen, is you.

Your name. Your title. Your power.

His brain short-circuits.

He just stares for a good five seconds, drink frozen halfway to his lips.

“What.”

Immediate, sharp, loud laughter.

“Oh, what the FUCK?! You gotta be kiddin’ me.”

He’s laughing so hard he slaps the bar. The bartender jumps. Other people in the bar look at him like he’s crazy.

Because of course. Of course, the one person he’s been dragging into the worst places, letting into his world, kissing, touching, —

Is actually one of the most powerful people in the world.

The moment he gets his laughter under control, he’s grinning. Big. Sharp. Wild.

“Well, well, well. Ain’t this a fuckin’ surprise.”

The next time he sees you? Oh, he is not letting you live this down.

He’s leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed, smirking like the devil himself.

“Sooo, babe. Anythin’ you wanna tell me? Y’know, like—what the fuck?”

If you try to act casual about it? He grabs your chin, tilts your head up, and just grins.

“Nah, nah, don’t gimme that. You mean to tell me I’ve been callin’ you ‘sweetheart’ and sneakin’ you into crime scenes, when I should’ve been callin’ you Boss?”

If you flirt back? Oh, he eats that shit up.

“Ohoho, you’re playin’ dangerous now, darlin’. You know what happens to people who turn me on and surprise me? Bad, bad things.”

He’s so into this.

Like, obnoxiously into it.

He starts calling you titles sarcastically.

“Ahh, my beloved CEO, let me open the door for ya.”

“Oh no, did my precious politician have a rough day? C’mere, lemme make it all better.”

“D’you think world leaders would shit themselves if they knew you were makin’ out with a serial killer? ‘Cause that’s funny as hell.”

But beneath the teasing? Oh, he’s obsessed.

He already thought you were a perfect match for him, but now?

Now, you’re not just smart. Not just dangerous in your own way.

You’re untouchable.

Bottom line? He is so in love with you it’s disgusting.

You’re powerful, you’re dangerous, and you’re his.

And that? That’s all he ever needed to know..

“So, what’s the play here, sweetheart? You gonna bring me down? Put me in the headlines? C’mon, gimme a scandal—make it a good one.”

If you tell him you have no intention of exposing him, that you’re here for your own reasons, he’s intrigued.

“Ahhh, so you’re just a little freak, huh? Love that for you.”

“So, tell me, baby—how’s it feel, bein’ the most dangerous person in the room for once?”

And when you smirk and say, “I’m always the most dangerous person in the room,”—Oh.

Oh, he loves you. Because it’s true, isn’t it? Ronin might be a killer, but you—you have real power. The kind of power that doesn’t need a knife to cut people down. AND that? That’s hot as hell.

Misaki

At first, Misaki thought you were just some random writer that Ronin picked up for fun. Maybe you were looking for inspiration in the darkest corners of the world, and hey, Misaki could respect that.

Until, one day, they’re watching TV in their bunker, shoveling cup noodles into their mouth, and—

Your face is on the news.

Immediate choking.

They nearly drop the noodles.

They stare.

Blink once. Twice.

Wait. What the fuck.

They scramble for the remote, turn the volume up, and suddenly, their world is spinning.

"HOLD ON—"

Because there you are, center screen, name plastered in bold letters. Some scandal, some massive political shift, some media shake-up—and at the heart of it all? You.

The person they’ve been flirting with. The person they’ve been spending nights with in calls.

"WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, BACK THE HELL UP—!"

They’re gripping their head, pacing their bunker, absolutely spiraling.

“You mean—you mean to tell me I’ve been flirting with someone who can LITERALLY change the world?! Oh my god—oh my god, I’m so broke, I can’t handle this—"

The next time they see you? They’re standing there, arms crossed, clearly trying to look intimidating but failing miserably because their face is still stuck in pure existential crisis mode.

“Sooo. You got anythin’ you wanna tell me, boss?”

If you just smirk and go, “Oh? You didn’t know?”

They groan loudly.

"OF COURSE I DIDN’T KNOW, YOU JERK! Oh my god, I was out here thinking you were some struggling writer, and now you’re telling me you could probably buy my entire life with a single check?!"

Cue another breakdown.

And if you’ve hired them before? Oh. Oh, that’s interesting.

“Hold on—wait, wait, wait. You’re telling me I’ve been talking to one of my clients this whole time?!”

They go through a full existential crisis.

But once the initial shock wears off? They’re intrigued.

“Okay, okay, but real talk—why the hell are you hanging out with us? You could be anywhere, doing anything, running the world, and yet, you’re here. Why?”

If you flirt with them? They malfunction.

“H-Hey, don’t distract me! This is serious! You—wait, what do you mean I look cute when I’m panicking?! That’s—STOP.”

But deep down? They FEEL KYAH!

If you say something like “Because I like you”

—They malfunction.“LIES. YOU’RE A LIAR. DON’T SAY THINGS LIKE THAT—”

But deep down? They’re kicking their feet.Because holy shit.

Someone that important thinks they’re important.

It’s the worst and best thing to ever happen to them.

Angel

At first, Angel just thought you were another charismatic, ambitious person—someone drawn into her orbit the way most people were. She didn’t question it too much. You were charming, clever, and played along with her public persona so well it was almost addictive.

Then, one day, she sees you on the news. Not in the background. Not as a guest. You are the news.

Maybe you’re a political powerhouse, a media mogul, an elite CEO—whatever it is, you’re big.

Cue an instant mental shutdown. She’s staring at the screen, eyes wide, mouth slightly open, and for once in her life, completely speechless.

“… Wait, wait, wait. What?!”

First, she replays every conversation the two of you have ever had, wondering how she missed the signs.

Second, she assumes you just didn’t tell her because… well, why would you? She wouldn’t have believed it anyway.

Third? Immediate concern.

Because she knows powerful people. She’s been around them.

And most of them are monsters.

But you? You’ve always been kind to her. Sweet. Playful. The same way she is with you.

…So why does this still feel like a dream?

When you finally come home, Angel is sitting on the couch, arms crossed, a frown on her lips—but her eyes are soft.

"Sooo…" she tilts her head. "Is this the part where you tell me I’ve been secretly dating royalty, or—?"

You try to explain, but she just leans closer.

"And when, exactly, were you gonna tell me that you're kind of a big deal?"

Pout. Full pout.

But she’s not actually mad. Just incredibly intrigued.

The more she learns about your influence, the more protective she gets.

She knows the price of power. She knows the pressure. The weight. The expectations.

And she knows what it’s like to need approval.

She’s quiet for a moment before reaching for your hand.

“Are you happy?” Her voice is gentle.

You nod, but she studies your face carefully, trying to find the cracks.

“You promise?”

If you squeeze her hand, reassure her? She melts.

She wants to believe you. So badly.

Angel is soft with you in ways she isn’t with the world.

She may be a perfectionist. She may be needy for attention. But with you?

She doesn’t have to perform.

She can just… be.

And that’s a rare, precious thing.

And she will make fun of you for the way you talk in "serious mode."

"Ooooh, look at you~ all professional and intimidating~"

But deep down? She’s proud.

She just expresses it through teasing.

She knows power changes people.

And she worries about that. About what it might do to you.

But she also loves you too much to let it push her away.

“No matter how big or important you are…” she murmurs, curling up against you. “You’re still mine.”

And honestly? There’s no one else in the world she’d rather love.

V

The moment, you open your video feed to see him for the first time he knows who you are.

V already knows who you are.

He’s rich. Powerful. Connected. No one reaches his radar without him knowing everything about them.

So when your face appears on his screen, he isn’t surprised.

What surprises him is the fact that you recognize him, too.

You tilt your head, lips curling into an amused smirk.

“Mr Valentin Viljoen, right? We’ve met before.”

His eyes narrow slightly. “Yes. And you are—”

“I'm your kind!” you interrupt smoothly, leaning back in your chair. “Without ever spilling a drop of blood.”

That makes him pause.

His posture tenses. Just for a second.

Because… that’s not wrong.

He’s seen your name in places that matter—a ghost behind the curtains of power.

You don’t get blood on your hands.

You hire people to do it for you.

At first, he’s wary.

You are the kind of person he hunts. The kind who orchestrates death while keeping their hands clean.

The kind that believes their cause justifies the means.

And yet…

You don’t silence everyone. You don’t kill for profit or ego.

You kill corrupt politician. The ones who slip through the cracks of the system. Like him.

He watches you closely after that.

“You play God,” he says one night, his voice measured. “Deciding who lives and who dies.”

You meet his gaze, unshaken.

“So do you.”

The two of you challenge each other constantly.

You push him to see the necessity of what you do.

He pushes you to consider the weight of it.

“Your assassins are no different than the people I kill,” he says coldly. “They’re just a tool you use to maintain control.”

You hum thoughtfully. “And you’re just a weapon that wields itself.”

Silence.

A game of chess with no clear winner.

But there’s one thing he can’t ignore.

You don’t kill the innocent.

Your network, your power—it’s built on a foundation of purpose.

And whether he likes it or not…

You’re not the villain he expected.

He watches you more than he should.

He listens to how smoothly you speak, how effortlessly you manipulate a conversation without a single lie.

He hates how drawn he is to it.

“You play dangerous games,” he mutters one night.

You smirk. “So do you.”

And he hates that you’re right.

He’s used to keeping his distance.

But you make that impossible.

The sharp way you tease him, the way you dance on the edge of his moral code.

It gets under his skin.

“What the hell are you?” you ask one night, head tilted. “A hero? A killer?”

His lips press into a thin line.

“What are you?” he counters.

It happens slowly.

At first, he tells himself he’s just keeping an eye on you.

But then it becomes habit.

Seeking your voice, waiting for your messages, analyzing your movements.

He finds himself protecting you before he even realizes why.

Because the moment someone tries to take you down?

He’s already one step ahead.

“You should leave,” he mutters after taking care of a hitman sent after you. “Disappear.”

You laugh softly. “And let them win?”

His jaw clenches.

He should walk away from you.

But he won’t.

Because for all his righteousness…

He can’t let you go.

[eddiegettingshot]

genuinely can i ask why you're so against people viewing eddie through a woman coded lense and finding it interesting to compare his own experiences traits and storylines with other female chracters? seeing as you yourself speak frequently about your headcanon for how much "buck diaz" wants to be eddie's submissive housewife who grows a magic womb and gives him tons of miracle babies or whatever and a lot of people use buck liking cooking/ wanting children/being emotional as evidence for this (which what the hell, sure) id thought you'd be open to the feminization of eddie the same way so many people for years have been feminizing buck. the only difference between the two is i see buck feminized more with sexual connotations while eddie's feminization comes from a more societal and familial analysis i think which don't get me wrong both have their heteronormative moments (single parent (which like it or not is most often applied to female characters)/eldest "daughter" parentification/denying himself what he wants etc are the arguments i most see for eddie) not trying to start a fight i just am curious about why you feel one's ok and not the other cause gotta be honest your vehement reaction to this kinda gave me a bad taste in my mouth considering how passionate you are about your headcanon of eddie being this macho dom top which im sure some people also feel is a gross mischaracterization as strongly as you feel about this like,, long story short i guess im just saying let people enjoy things! lol

i think woman coded is stupid as an actual character/tv analysis 😭😭 if someone said buck was woman coded id fucking laugh too because it’s not actually a useful way to analyze his character whatsoever and genuinely have you ever seen me make this claim in earnest for buck? because i don’t do that, ESPECIALLY not citing the reasons you included here, and i also don’t write him as a submissive housewife in my serious creative work.

as you pointed out yourself for eddie it comes from “societal”/“family” which to me feels obnoxious because the ENTIRE point of eddie’s character and specifically his relationship to fatherhood is that he is a man who’s raising his son in a way that he wasn’t allowed from his own father. people yell so much about eddie’s toxic masculinity or his relationship to masculinity or whatever but in the face of choices he makes/ways he behaves that are in active opposition to those kinds of ideals the response is “ok so this means he’s being coded as a woman” … not to mention the flip side of this seems to be a way of looking at SHANNON that’s patently ridiculous considering that her entire story (what we have been allowed of it) is specifically tied up in motherhood, her feelings of failing as a mother, etc. viewing these canon storylines in this way and making claims about these characters like that is patently different from a widespread half-joke about how getting struck by lightning made buck impregnable… i’m sure you see that?

and suggesting that i think eddie is a macho dom top is like actually kind of hilarious considering literally the one thing i’m always talking about is how he ISNT macho 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 at every turn i am on this blog arguing about how this man is emotional and vulnerable and goofy while the fandom at large insists that he’s not. i’m sorry like. hello?? i also outright said i don’t care about being progressive, i didn’t say anything was problematic, i just think this is an obnoxious and hilarious way to intellectually look at things (and deeply transparent but i digress).

[eye-may]

A Guide to ✨Jellicle Legends ✨

🔥In my pinned post era. 🔥

Was ist das? "Jellicle Legends" is the unofficial title of my CATS "fanverse." I'm creating this post to help people navigate the barely-coherent Legends cosmos.

About Legends: I like to say it's 100% "canon compliant," which is something I'm always big on, so I don't personally call it an "AU." On the other hand, we are talking about CATS. What even is "canon" for this intellectual property?

Basically you can think of it as my interstellar network of "headcanons" or how I generally construe CATS, based on many productions/companies/statements from cast alumni/etc. There is not one official production that I strictly adhere to! My fanverse is basically a web of my favorite ways in which to interpret the characters, their backstories and relationships, the world of CATS, etc.

Legends is also a continuation, of sorts; picking up immediately after the events of the musical, there is a story within that has a clear beginning, middle, and end. The characters all have their individual arcs and journeys, and the world itself has a bevy of systems/rules/cultures/etc. Ideally I would corporealize the saga with serialized comics, but that is 🎵time consuming🎵 so I'm never going to commit to that 100%. If/when I create comics, don't count on regular updates or completion. That said, you can ask me whatever you want about the story and I'll answer it comprehensively! No worries about "spoilers" because, like I said, I'm not interested in putting the pressure on myself to actually materialize a comprehensive comic series.

Keep in mind that this is just a casual, fun project for me, so I always just post ut fit; ideas are always coming, going, and changing, so sometimes I'll establish a concept or a design and then change my mind about it later! If you notice inconsistencies...that would be why. XD

All Legends posts are tagged "#CJL." If you ever post something pertaining to Legends yourself and you want me to see it, I encourage you to use this hashtag! I'm BEYOND thrilled whenever anybody engages with me about my fanon in any capacity whatsoever. ❤️

🐈Asks About Characters:

Who owns the cats? (Jennyanydots, Jellylorum, Tugger, Mistoffelees, Victoria, Demeter)

Thoughts on Coricopat and Tantomile?

Munkustrap Personality/Relationships

Which cat is the smallest?

Etcetera and Electra Relationship/Backstories

Pouncival and Tumblebrutus Relationship/Backstories

Thoughts on the Three Words (entire cast!)

Victoria and Jemima Backstories (+Victoria's relationship with Mistoffelees)

Plato Personality/Backstory

Tuggoffelees Headcanons

Demeter Backstory

Macavity and Mistoffelees's Relationship

Mistoffelees (Part 1, OUTDATED)

Mistoffelees (Part 2)

Grizabella Backstory

"Ships" (Tuggoffelees / Munkustrap & Alonzo / Demelarina / Bustopher & Mistoffelees)

Alonzo and Cassandra

Tugger

Misc. Headcanons (Munk, Tugger, Macavity, Mistoffelees, Deuteronomy) Some of these are OUTDATED.

🎨Art (#CJLart)

Note: This list includes sketches I did not necessarily for CJL, but that constitute concepts I may reference/apply to it, or that I think fit within it. (I.e., I drew Skimble for Jellicle January not based on any particular iteration of Skimble, and I think the design more or less represents how he appears in CJL).

Valentines Tuggoffelees

Mistoffelees in a cape (+Tugger)

Cute Tuggoffelees (ft. Mistoffelees's Demon Eyes)

Mistoffelees Splash Art

Sleepy Tuggoffelees (1)

Sleepy Tuggoffelees (2)

Munkustrap & Alonzo Doodle

Tall Jemima (+Terminally Short Mistoffelees)

Etcetera & Electra

"The Big Three" (Tugger, Munk, Misto) Christmas

Pouncival Ambushing Tumblebrutus

Tiny Mistoffelees (+Tugger and Alonzo)

Victoria & Mistoffelees, and also Jemima

Plato

Tuggoffelees Hug

Pouncival Triumphs Vertically Over Mistoffelees

Angsty Lyric Comic ft. Deut Bros + Mistoffelees

Macavity Apprehends Mistoffelees

Mistoffelees Design Concepts

Tugger and Mistoffelees Visit Jellylorum

Demelarina

Caramel

Alonzo and Rumpusgeorge

Skimble

Smol Angy Cavity

NBK and Patches

Dancing Jenny

NBK

[gomzdrawfr]

How do you feel about someone getting a tattoo of one of your Chibi Cod boys?

I would appreciate it if they ask me before getting the tattoo and a photo after the tattoo is finished :] maybe a small tip if they're cool with it. I'm generally fine with it (even if it's wild to imagine my silly doodle now exist on someone's flesh haha) though I did had a different approach back then.

I had multiple people requesting this actually and I did an interest check back in October last year I think? With something like this and majority voted for individual custom tattoo (meaning they don’t want it to be repeated)

A few friends were saying I should charge or do something like opening tattoo request service on ko-fi with rates around 15-25$, or do something like a tattoo ticket for all doodles (the concept of if you buy this pass, then you can get tattoo from any of the doodles I've posted, I think?) I had those plans in mind but life kinda got in the way and I sort of put it off for now.

Firstly, I don't know much about tattoo and I don't really know if there's like a specific requirement for tattoo design to work long-term on skin (they'll wear off right? will my design affect that? etc). I was ghosted once when someone wanted a cat!Price tattoo back then (still have the file sitting like a sad wet cat in my folders somewhere) so I'm also kind of sceptical HAHA. Secondly, I have no idea how pricing is going to work (back then I bounced the idea around and got replies of 25usd, it was apparently too low and they suggested me to bump it up to 50usd - which is a bit ??? for me cuz i dont really know the values)

Who knows, with all the free time after my finals I might look into it more.

Literally this thing has been sitting in my phone since last year, taunting me whenever I use the damn phone xD

[kedreeva]

HI!! It's the guy who asked about the medical mice stuff, I wanted to THABK YOU!! for your answers:) seriously informative and I appreciate it! I figured as much that culling is a massive part of it, instead of vet stuff, and I'm alright with that! I've familiarized myself with how important culling is, keeping the future mice as healthy and as unprone to diseases as I can is a big goal for me, I think. I currently own chinchillas and BOY I know how expensive vet treatment can get, I can only imagine how much more it'd be for tons of mice. And the hassle.

I had no idea disease testing was a thing though! That's interesting, but man that doesn't seem that.. worth it, with the points you mentioned. And sucks that most breeders will start over if most of their colony gets something Bad but I 100% understand that. I'll definitely be sure to research up more on everything to have on hand when I inevitably have to deal with mites, and I'll definitely make it a point to be very vigilant with health checks and quarantine:) and also 100% do a ton of research in getting good founders, thanking you a TON right now!! As I've mentioned before I really do want the best for these future guys

Sure no problem!

More under cut because culling discussion again

And honestly if you're starting with decent stock and being careful about quarantine for anything you add... You're really unlikely to have to cull much for health unless you get wildly unlucky. I've had these lines for a few years and the VAST majority of culls are population (males I don't need, pinks from larger litters, young females that don't get adopted before I need space again, older breeders that retire and don't get adopted etc), failure to thrive (ie, scrawny babies that just don't make it if left alive), and feeder quality mice (temperament issues). The biggest health problem I'm dealing with is when mice that have siamese/splash blood get a tumor/cyst or two as they get old. Old age masses are one of the hardest things to get rid of because you don't see them until the mouse is nearly done breeding. Outside of masses, I've had mites once (twice if you go back 25 years to college), pinworm once, and coccidia twice (once in the whole colony, once in quarantine but I still treated the whole colony just in case), one malocclusion, two head tilts (one of which was a circler), two URIs, a couple of cloudy/ulcerated eyes (can happen when they scratch themselves), and a couple penile prolapses way back at the start of the siamese line. I've had one line collapse (the tricolor line) due to bad founding animals. And that's across over two decades of breeding! And I can count them because I remember each case because it's unusual to have lots of health problems with mice, if you've been careful with initial stock, selection, and biosecurity.

What I'm trying to say is, don't be too anxious about it. While it will come up, and you'll have to deal with it harshly when it does, it's also not likely that you'll be up to your ears in health issues on a daily basis or anything.

Good luck with them and feel free to ask if you have other questions!

[gcballet]

Nah, you're not crazy, an SF based sitcom attempting a lot of high-minded tropes above it's station for over thirty years is going to have a lot of space for theory.

Very long post to follow bc you got me thinking, man. I went back and added headings bc I was getting lost.

We All Love/Hate Lacan

First off. You mention the hologram as a disabled, queer body, and then immediately Lacan. Just to reassure, everyone has trouble using Lacan rather than his descendants. Everyone skips him. Lacan is WEIRD. A lot of his published work is like, lecture transcripts, and also he liked trying to formulate language into a kind of algebra. Also he was French and lots of crucial puns get lost in translation? He's great but also he sucks.

Quite cynically, and you didn't ask, if you have the interest, I would recommend clipping out one solid but brief Lacan quote you definitely understand and can use to illuminate your Edelman readings, literally just to score points and to make clear you understand Edelman in his context. But I would consider this time contigent bc Lacan is such a pain, there's a reason no one reads him.

Good ways in are the section on him in the Poststructuralism chapter in Peter Barry's Beginning Theory, or the section on him in Catherine Belsey's Poststructuralism: A Very Short Introduction, both of which have audiobooks on Spotify. If you have more time to put towards him, Zizek's How To Read Lacan is supposed to be quite good.

I bring it back to Lacan because mentioning him and holograms made me realise that (hologram) Rimmer is not himself - the signified, but the sign of himself. Lacan has this whole annoying s/S algebra thing which I have only ever vaguely wrapped my head around. Kristeva I think is the one to properly term it semiotics? Might be misremembering.

You know that one Magritte painting, Les trahison des images?

You see what I'm getting at. The object is not it's name, a rose by any other name etc. In death (and disability as you imply), Rimmer is reduced to the sign of himself. If Lister is the holding pattern for human life, is hologram Rimmer the holding pattern for living Rimmer?

[Ouroboros]

[Made a point of looking up the phrase 'holding pattern' and it's an aeronautics term for when planes circle an airport awaiting landing clearance. Killing time, circling, flying. Red Dwarf the ship coasts indefinitely throughout the series, looking for a safe port. Something there on coasting through life?]

Hologram Rimmer could then be argued to be reconfigured as the sign for a completely different signified than human Rimmer, when he 'becomes Ace'. He doesn't become Ace, not in a literal sense. What happens is he begins to signify Ace. Hologram Rimmer is the sign, the picture of the signified Arnold J. Rimmer (deceased). They adjust the sign (Hologram Rimmer) and therefore on a semiotic level Hologram Rimmer becomes Ace Rimmer, a different signified. Who is, of course, also a deceased signified, and being repeated through infinite signs of himself.

[There's an unrelated but hard queer read in Stoke Me a Clipper on gender performativity, but that's Judith Butler and a different path entirely. The bit where he makes he voice deeper. Wears a wig. Tries to pass. It's not subtle.]

That's a very unpolished and inexact summary of how I would approach Lacan for Red Dwarf at any rate, be it of interest.

Kristeva/French Feminism

Regarding your question about Kristeva and the maternal body as the site of meaning and language, yeah, that sounds correct. It has been a while since I've done a Kristeva close read, but the idea of the female (maternal) body as the source of language is a recurring one in the writing of the French feminists (Kristeva herself is Bulgarian but she writes French and gets bundled with them). The two other major players on the topic are Hélène Cixous and Luce Irigaray. Cixous coined the term l'ecriture feminine for it, and they go very loose and poetic with it. Cixous has a whole thing of women writing out of the body, or writing in milk. The idea was finding a language for women to fully express their experiences.

I think in 2025 it's immediately obvious why l'ecriture feminine isn't especially popular now; it does a lot of reinscribing binaries and bioessentialism, and they got called out by the Anglo-American feminists at the time. While in the 80s it was revolutionary and necessary for legitimate radical feminist thought, obv that discourse has been somewhat co-opted by terfs and other bad actors. I'd go careful using this stuff purely bc Lister inverting (I wouldn't necessarily say SUBverting, as you do, but I'm not sure why I feel this distinction) the binary of maternal body has potential, and I love the idea of his body as a site of meaning for humanity, bc it's bourne out by the show narrative, you do risk just reinscribing when you reverse the binary and make the male the mother, rather than breaking the binary entirely and creating multiple wider, queer fit categories, which is a better contemporary goal. I loved l'ecriture feminine so much at undergrad bc the French feminist school all write with so much poetry in their theory, but my supervisor warned me to go careful too, bc it hasn't aged amazingly. Kristeva isn't judged as harshly as Cixous though, people don't usually need to justify using her work.

Death as Disability

I do love the idea of death as the ultimate disability of the body - mind-body disconnect? The kinds of madness and odd behaviours Rimmer demonstrates when he glitches or alters his program - (Thanks For the Memory, Holoship, Quarantine, Trojan, how about brain in a jar Lister in Out of Time?) [Oh shit transhumanism? Uh, what's her name. Shit - Cyborg Manifesto - DONNA HARRAWAY. Queer bodies in there and all, she's superb for your purposes, make sure you've got her]

I assume the 'death isn't the obstacle it used to be' convo from Balance of Power is part of your way into that? And Holoship perhaps, with it's evocative stuff about not noticing the disability when it's normalised and provided for? Disability existing in context of the environment. George McIntyre in The End introducing the concept of holograms with the linguistic distancing you hear in workplace sensitivity discourse.

[The End]

Edelman - The Child

Jumping back to what you've said about the (hetero) normalising effect of the image of The Child - the implicit linear (straight) future of them, you're bang on the money with that I think. The two occasions we see Lister's children (himself (played by Charles's brother or cousin iirc, so theres a metatextual biological reality there) in Timeslides at the pub gig, then multiple series later in Ouroboros, and Jim and Bexley in Future Echoes and implied later in Parallel Universe and the opening text crawl of Backwards)

All of this is done through queer (incestuous) reproduction, either through effectively a T4T mpreg, or an IVF for a vaguely queer couple of KK2 and hologram Lister. The Child can only be witnessed by looking back in time. The Child is (literally) oneself (Lister, Fathers and Suns etc) in this queer reading, and not actually a literal product of heterosexual reproduction. The twin who is killed offscreen in Future Echoes looks enough like Lister to make Rimmer think it was him - Lister's offspring are completely indistinct from him. [The term non-euclidean reincarnation comes to mind - I think that's after Jung? Or it might be some esoteric woo woo (pos) from The Whole Rabbit. The concept of us being literally our parents reincarnated hence generational trauma?] I hope I'm roughly following what I imagine your rationale is with The Child here, having not read Edelman. I'll get back to the break of the circle/loop you suggest in a bit.

Just skewing off that, what about Rimmer's weird fantasy of heteronormativity in Better Than Life? The fact he can't seem to imagine a successful heterosexual relationship without the enormous burden of reproduction and responsibility. I *think* that's the only time we see Rimmer in a father role, besides maybe Rimmerworld? But again, that's super queer and incestuous with the clones and his goal of producing a biological twin sister to have sex with going awry.

Cruel Optimism

With the 'cruel optimism' concept, just to flag and check you've also caught Rimmer's 'become an officer' goal there. I'm sure you have, because it's parallel to Lister's impossible goal of Kochanski, but I wanted to make sure. Also aliens. Rimmer really wants there to be aliens. I think there's something there about belief. Rimmer is deeply unspiritual, argues with the Universe in Krysis, but the prospect of aliens and high technology is his kind of hope. I suppose Legion would come in there, perhaps not 'curing', but certainly shifting how his 'disability' functions.

Gnosticism Tangent

Regarding the gnostic reading, this is more something relevant for solid SF context reading than anything political, or especially relevant for your methodology, but it is somewhat obscure, so I'll explain. The framework of gnostic mythology crops up a lot in 20th C SF, and I think perhaps that's why there's a way into it via Red Dwarf, again through that trickle down of themes and structures, rather than anything deliberate by Grant Naylor. PKD was a huge fan of it, and I know they drew on Blade Runner/Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? somewhat, so that's probably how the comparison crept in. My knowledge of gnosticism is mostly from the quite casual toned podcast The Whole Rabbit, the hosts of which have done gnostic readings of The Truman Show, A Scanner Darkly - I think at one point they read Finding Nemo. It's one of those lesser known mythologies which is pretty influential on a certain kind of writer. It's mostly used in allegory so the readings don't really 'achieve' anything per se but they are fascinating.

Will say as well, mentioning the Demiurge and the Ouroboros serpent together, yeah those two images fit very naturally.

Anyway, dw about my gnosticism tangent. It's not relevant to your thesis, I just find it fun, and I think it's a useful frame for digging out unnoticed details by defamiliarisation when you're used to better known Biblical narrative.

Ouroboros and Status Quo

The kind of cyclical repetition of the Ouroboros being a focus for you, have you looked into how the genre of Red Dwarf serves this? The show is cartoonishly slavish to the Status Quo (Rimmer immediately losing his human body at the end of Timeslides) but has a progressing narrative as well. The moments the show acknowledges the consequences of previous episodes vs which stuff is ignored is a site of a lot of narrative power. The quick write out of Jim and Bexley at the top of Backwards springs to mind.

The sitcom status quo absolutely fascinates me as a trope because it's so invisible and yet is utterly horrifying when extrapolated (WWDITS recently explored this quite effectively). The self-destructive loop Lister (and Rimmer) enacts isn't just the Ouroboros, but format derived, and therefore the viewer is complicit. Lister isn't growing because that's funnier. I'm thinking of the ending of Fathers and Suns especially, where Lister returns to drinking and games, implicitly failing to be the father he needs for himself. He will need to repeat the cycle again, learn the same lesson again. In Krysis Rimmer and Lister discuss Kryten's character development, revealing that despite 'breaking his programming' he actually hasn't changed much. He's a sitcom character. He can't. But the in-universe implications for a static unchanging identity are horrifying. If Rimmer (hologram) didn't age with Lister, what would that look like? A mid-20s appearing hologram bickering with the 50-60 year old last human? How desperately bleak.

On my current rewatch of X and XI (I'm just into XII now), I was struck by how there's one or two stories which echo the older phases of the show. Back to Reality/Back to Earth, Polymorph/Can of Worms, Legion/Krysis, Meltdown/Cured, DNA/Siliconia, Me²/Rimmerworld/Officer Rimmer. Some of these comparisons are more superficial than others, but the relevance is in the repeated relearning of elements of identity. The rewriting, retelling of the same stories. On a shallow level, that's simply a function of a long running sitcom, but within the text it speaks to the cyclical lives they're trapped in.

You get it, repetitions, the same lessons over and over. Red Dwarf is comparable in age to probably the most important (and most repetitive) sitcom in history, The Simpsons, and there was a recent episode (like September 2024 recent) I'm thinking of called Bart's Birthday (s36e01) which explored the idea of status quo breaking. The episode was framed as an AI generated finale for the show (something which I believe was relevant to a viral tweet? Can't remember), in which different characters begin to leave and change. Bart is about to turn 11, but begins to panic at his birthday party, and goads Homer into strangling him, at which point the show freezes and resets. Recent Simpsons is weird. It's as unsettling as it sounds, and the horror of it is purely from responding to the status quo and bringing it into a meta space. It's a massively underestimated structural trope in my opinion, and if it wasn't part of a low form like a sitcom, would have merited far deeper study as a structural device by now.

[Broad tangent, have you ever watched/read Washburn's Mr Burns: A Post Electric Play? Amazing piece of theatre, feels Red Dwarf and absurdism adjacent in terms of apocalypse and sitcom and repetitions. Linked a great video essay by Kyle Kallgren below]

The whole format of Red Dwarf as sitcom is cyclical and repetitive, despite deeper progress into space and short term changes, and it's easy to write that off as an accident of genre, but I think there's something in it to support your Ouroboros readings. Unlike The Simpsons, the characters in Red Dwarf age, and there are changes, but they have to learn the same lessons repeatedly, as any long run sitcom character does.

[Balance of Power]

Absurdism

Lastly, regarding the theatre of the absurd! I had a smack in the face watching the opening of Samsara the other day - Rimmer repeatedly throwing dice and getting a two and a one at impossible odds. I wracked my brain and I found it - it's a rehash of the iconic coin flipping scene from Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead by Tom Stoppard! Killing time, playing games, arguing over semantics. Yeah, that's Lister and Rimmer too.

Conclusion

I love a back and forth with someone else who knows theory, please please please let me know if you want anything looked at or listened to. You're more than welcome to drop rants at me any time if it helps to have someone who knows Red Dwarf, or just for a bit of encouragement.

I'm deeply inexpert on queer and crip theory, so couldn't really do more with that for you, but if you want to elaborate on any more of that and how you plan to use it, I would love to read that particularly.

I really am enjoying this discussion, and hope I've given you something to spark progress.

gcb ❤️

[Me close reading theory]

I'm so troubled by Lister continuing to pursue Kochanski after learning she's his biological mother. That genuinely bothers me.

[the-casbah-way]

people really come to my city and pay forty quid for a guided tour just so a bespectacled middle aged man in a poundland halloween costume can tell them about how people used to chuck pots of shite out the window and then instantly die of the plague

[epiphainie]

i can't with all these "the show is highlighting tommy's jealousy, they're planting seeds that it will cause problems" takes like bffr. he mentioned being envious over the 118's dynamic twice, sure, but in what world (literally how?) would that cause a relationship problem? do yall expect him to be in cahoots with gerrard behind their back and murder buck to take over his life or something?? like even with the hyperbole aside, i genuinely cannot see how they can turn this into relationship drama without going against everything they showed us with tommy so far

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

feeling very grateful for the cute barista today who clearly clocked a) my fontaines d.c. tote, and b) the fact i was stuck on a spectacularly bad date, and proceeded to play me an entire playlist of fontaines d.c. and sneak me extra vegan marshmallows with my hot chocolate

[langfield]

This is a pretty dumb question, but you're an interesting person so I'd like to see your perspective on it. I realize people tend to give flack to people in the fandom who enjoy games made by Deck Nine, due to their games usually suffering from the same issues and because the studio itself has the Nazi and sexual harassment allegations ehich are of course problematic. I don't think people who like DE and True Colors deserve harassment, you and other people definitely don't deserve harassment. If anything you seem to have far more grace and give it to far more than other people have. I guess I'm really wondering how do you go about navigating the conversation that is Deck Nine? Do you think it's s good idea to seperate the art and the artist, or do you have an alternate interpretation of it?

hello! thank you so much for the question ( which is not at all dumb, by the way! ), because i think deck nine’s mistreatment of employees is important to address whether one likes their lis games or not. i’ll preface this by saying that i rarely ever get involved in behind the scenes production for medias i consume, mostly because it never enriches or devalues the experience for me. there are, of course, interesting things to discern from the creators ; you can easily find out why maybe the latter half of a story fell flat, or why certain characters disappeared, and a bunch of fun little details like that … but that extra knowledge is merely icing on the cake for me, rather than a part of the cake itself. while the people behind a game are important, i’ve always put more weight into my own interpretation of events, which can either align with author’s intent or not. to me, media is always what you personally make of it, and as a very queer person in an extremely straight world ( whose opinions hardly mesh with fanon takes held as gospel ), i’m used to crafting my own stories within works that aren’t exactly what was meant to be displayed. don’t get me wrong! i’m well aware of the canons i indulge in! i can easily find out what a lis game was trying to accomplish ( given how unsubtle said games are ) i just might add my own spin or flavor to it. i think everything ever made exists to be interpreted in multiple ways : so pouring over companies and the conditions behind them aren’t exactly on my to-do list.

however, i am well aware of deck nine’s mistreatment of employees. i’ve read articles discussing true color’s shitshow and i follow a former double exposure writer who was laid off, one who has no qualms complaining about it and the impossible work conditions they were under. it is all very bad and very true, and that deserves to be acknowledged. anytime i defend double exposure ( or before the storm, or true colors ) i am never defending deck nine as a company! i do not care for deck nine like that, nor am i inclined to give them grace … the sympathy i give is always towards the actual employees, especially the writers of said games, whom fans are excessively cruel towards. it absolutely disgusts me when fans claim that the writers of de deserved to be fired before christmas because they did a ‘bad job’ -- when the reality is that the writers are phenomenal people who did their best to make a game and characters worth caring about. the flaws of double exposure is entirely based on how deck nine refused to let the writers breathe! they had to change the story seven thousand times because deck nine wasn’t happy, and because deck nine was betting on making a sequel, much to the dismay of said writers.

i, personally, do not understand people who hate before the storm, true colors, and double exposure simply because deck nine made it. while i support acquiring games illegally so as to not support corrupt companies, i think you should give these games a try regardless. many of the employees on deck nine who suffered through sexual harassment and general abuse have said that it brings them joy to see people love the games they worked on, or the characters they helped create. many have said that the writing that is praised in these games were decisions marginalized people on these writing teams fought for. the people deck nine has abused do care for the games they’ve created, and care for them passionately! :

the last two screenshots are rather important to me, as they prove that the writers do indeed understand the life is strange games and franchise. many claim they don’t, but they do! and they’re the ones who have fought to keep lis as lis as possible. they love these games and tried to do them as much justice as they were allowed. this is always important to understand, in my opinion.

so, where does that leave me? i think how i approach deck nine’s games is that i approach them as i would any other, out of respect to the employees who gave these games their all despite deck nine’s toxic environment. perhaps i’m far more lenient on the mistakes inherent in their games because i know the writers couldn’t make the games how they wanted, which would’ve probably be leagues better than the ones we got. i appreciate what these people fought to include ( like the topics of racism, empathy, and queerness ) and i condemn deck nine for what they’ve done, but i don’t condemn the poor employees for doing the best they could under impossible circumstances. their works are weak and aren’t even close to perfect, yet i find extremely enjoyable content within said works anyway. these employees have explicitly stated their thanks and desire for people to enjoy these games, so that’s what i shall do! it’s less of a ‘seperate the work from the author’ and more of a ‘the author isn’t just some soulless company, the author was people, queer and poc and otherwise, so it’s fine to acknowledge the abuse they faced while still connecting to their games as they have encouraged us to do.’ deck nine sucks. and maybe their lis games suck. but i find it more important to respect the victims behind the games who have made their opinions clear rather than feign activism by hating the games these victims poured their blood, sweat, and tears into, all while claiming i’m hating these games for said victims. that’s just my opinion, though! people can always do as they like, but this is how i deal with deck nine’s toxicity while also engaging with the lis titles they’ve created.

[otome-dissection]

I think everyone should think about yakuza kenzan forever and ever and talk about the insane levels of kazumaji in kenzan forever and ever and rgg should announce and make a kenzan! remake please please guys talk about kenzan Plea

[cozylittleartblog]

The way you draw deltarune characters is so charming! Have you ever drawn King?

like twice lol

[commsroom]

like, i said "how many times do you think eiffel's said he wishes he could forget a movie so he could watch it for the first time" because he would and, well... you know. but aside from being kinda darkly funny, i think it's kind of nice? especially if you are of the opinion (like i am) that he will get his memories back in some way, at some point - how many people actually get the chance to watch their favorite stuff for the first time again? and without spoilers or pop culture saturation - maybe he experiences the joy of some of that stuff in a whole new way! maybe there are things he doesn't like without nostalgia and context, or at least things he sees in a whole different light and - assuming he gets his memories back at some point - he would then remember both of those feelings and perspectives... maybe this is too much to hope for, but maybe it could even force him to contextualize some of his own nostalgia and pop culture biases. either way, i think it could potentially be a really interesting detail + angle in further deconstructing eiffel's Default Guy Worldview.

[icewindandboringhorror]

Lineup of all of the characters that appear long enough to need a visual representation of them in the game lol