#especially those mushroom coffees?

[rangerpippin]

I feel like I keep seeing ads like

Company A: try our strange new genre of product! You'll like it, we promise!

Me: uhhh

Company B: Don't get company A's product, you'll hate it! We have our own version of the same strange new product, but ours is Actually good, trust us

Me: oh okay so now I'm definitely not buying from either of you

[stuck-writing-sickos]

In Poor Taste [P4]

[Series Link]

(Yandere × F! Reader)

[Warning: misogyny, explicit language, violence, harrassment, bodily harm]

(A/N: i see some of yall find Lukas so offputting 🎯yall not rocking with him? Why❤️What for✨️ is it his personality 💕is he vile and disgusting 🥹? do u hate him💋? Do u wanna beat his ass 🫶? )

You were never crazy about spoiled rich men. They were nothing but troubles.

He didn't expect to see a familiar face in the tight, dim, sweaty corner of Tokyo. He regretted going to this silly punk rock concert in the first place, but he did say this morning that he would go to one so he could talk to you about it. Mostly he was set on going because he wanted to try out something new, something to talk about - his peers wouldn't set foot near this underground coffee. It was unfortunate that he had no genuine interest in the music - it was loud and complicated. Unpredictable. The guitar might sound cool, but there wasn't a groove to which he could chill and bob his head or trip balls on mushroom while making out with a stranger. No trippy backdrops here - just the dim, anxiety-inducing colored stage light.

So he was there at a standing table way back, watching the crowd dance and scream. He found it strange - the hair, the makeup, the eccentric clothes. The only thing he would safely get behind was the fishnet and leather skirts that some girl really rocked. Sometimes, the girls over at the States would wear that to bars or theme nights. He liked that. He didn't like the way he feel here - half aroused, half judgemental. He would rather the tight sportwears on tanned blond surfers or yoga instructors. The ones who earned nods and hums and vile comments from his frat brothers were he to kiss and tell. Being attracted to them made him feel normal. Accepted. Approved. He wouldn't be caught dead eyeing these women.

But his friends weren't here, so he got to look. Never tell, though. Or if he did, he would say "oh, they dressed crazy", or "their eyeliner were scary", or "their piercings freak me out".

Deciding that it was time for another beer, Lukas begrudgingly went to the bar again. He felt anxious and alone, sticking out like a sore thumb. He earned quite some looks from women, but he couldn't be so sure if they liked what they see or if they could tell he was a poser who only came just to say he did it. He couldn't read their expressions, partly since he was drunk, partly because he was now considering the cultural differences, even if only for a morcel. He was made aware of it most pointedly this morning: the couple faux-pas he made with Sakamoto might have been intentional, but the guy's lack of reaction made him question how big of an insult he had put out there.

Sakamoto made him feel defensive, though Lukas decided not to dwell on it. He wasn't one to feel insecure, especially with guys like that - soft faced and soft-spoken. His big round eyes and sickly skin made him look like a woman, too. At least, Lukas would acknowledge that he was tall. But that was his only saving grace.

He wasn't explicitly aware that he was feeling more territorial over you. It wasn't about you anyway, it was by default. Even in the past, he had done these things - putting down other men to get to women. They were his wingmen, he would justify, they weren't supposed to outshine him. When it was his turn to wingman, he definitely let his brothers dog on him for days. It was common and understandable. If anything, Sakamoto should make ways for him. A girl like you wouldn't suit that guy - he was too uptight and serious. What would two high-strung people do together? You should be with someone who know what a good time is. Also, he saw something Sakamoto didn't - a glimpse of your tattoo. Those family-man wouldn't know how to deal with that. How would he take bring that up to his family? They would freak. Even his sister's "31:25" tattoo freaked his parents out, and they were already the most liberal rich family in his neighborhood.

Yeah, Sakamoto should leave you to him.

Settling in on a barstool, he ordered another beer, then repeat himself when the bartender couldn't quite make out what he was trying to say.

Lukas let his eyes scan the people sitting near him. Only a few, he noticed. It wasn't a crazy crowd to begin with.

After this beer, he'd go home.

As the bartender come back with his bottle, Lukas noticed something he didn't expect. From the crowd, you emerged, making your way toward the bar. He blinked, trying to see if he was mistaken.

No... that was definitely you.

All black from head to toes, you treaded silently like a death omen, your sleek heels clicking. Your short sleeved turtle neck and your tight pants started a heat within his chest. Your face wasn't any different, though - just the usual look. No crazy eyeliner, no bold dark lipstick. Seemed like you did not come here to impress the crowd.

You didn't notice him. Hopping onto a stool at the other end with your back facing him, you ordered something.  You knew Japanese, or just enough to get by. A lot of expats got to that point eventually.

Lukas debated on confronting you about your lies - you said you would be at dinner with a friend. Or maybe he could do that tomorrow.

He didn't peg you for such a casual liar.

Lukas hatched another plan: he could observe you, and see how deep your lies could go. Sipping on his beer, he followed your movement. You adjusted in your chair, still with that calm manner you carried yourself. Then, his eyes rested on your skin left bare by the bold backless top. You looked good, but clueless. Would you know the implications of such a shirt? The way your body moved in it... men would think you were asking for troubles. Bad men. Asshole men who didn't know they were pigs. At least he had the decency to admit that he was a pig, but he was an honest pig who respected women. He was a pig who knew to ask once, then if rejected a couple more time just to make sure, then he would leave it alone. Most pigs wouldn't know to even ask.

You sipped on your pink cocktail. That was cute. Your right now style reminded him of those ravebabes he met during spring break, but you were more subtle and quiet. Your movement were less urgent, and your clothes were less exposing. It was a nice feminine touch.

Your moment of rest didn't seem to last long. A man had chosen to sit down right next to you. This man was lanky, dressed in a very unbuttoned black button-down. He started to chatter, first in Japanese, then in English. Another sleazeball trying to test out his games. Lukas wondered when would be appropriate to interfere.

Your body language made it clear you weren't interested, but not afraid. Immediately covering your drink, you tried to turn your body away. The man seemed not to mind. If anything, his speech seemed more excited, his hands moving around like a stupid puppet. Desperate, Lukas thought, that was not a good look.

Deciding your half-finished drink wasn't safe anymore, you laid it on the bar and stepped down, trying to leave. Upon this, the man caught your wrist, forcing you to turn his way. Lukas' stomach twisted - here it was, the moment where he step it and scare off this asshole.

A loud, off-tune note shred through the music. Lukas looked at the stage. The band played on, but it seemed there was a technical issues with the guitarist.

The momentary distraction cost him his chance to intervene. When he turned his eyes back to you, he was hit with a strange scene - in a swift movement you twisted your arms around the man's and grabbed onto his forearm, forcing it down so hard he stumbled. Your face, now turned sideway during the commotion, was eerily calm when you talked. Lukas heard "Sir... I said no."

The man said something in Japanese, something that sounded bitter. Probably a curse word. Lukas jumped off his seat just as the stranger swung with his free arm to slap you across the face. The bartender seemed to have decided that whatever was going on was enough, and she rushed to you. Before she could, you clenched your idle fist and landed an uppercut so hard the harrasser let out a cartoonish "oof", his limp fingers releasing you as he stumbled backward, hitting right against the bouncer who appeared as if from the shadow.

Something in Lukas awakened in that moment. Your stone cold feature and your bruised knuckle left him slack-jawed. He stepped closer, intending to ask if you were okay. Once again, he was interrupted.

"Sir and ma'am, please explain what happened", the burly bouncer commanded. The pathetic guy excitedly tried to speak, but you only crossed your arms and watched. Your eyes was set on the sad attempt at vidication, but you were patient to let him finish his spiel.

"Is it true that you attacked this gentleman unprovoked, ma'am?"

"I apologize for the commotion, sir", your bowed, hands now hanging right atop your knees. Pulling yourself back up, you continued, "this young man seemed to have taken my rejection poorly, and he had slapped me across my face. I understand that my punch was unseemly, but I did that in an attempt to protect myself. He had gotten ahold of my arms and hit me, so I was fearing for the worst."

The bouncer's scowled, but he decided that he had heard it all. His big hand grabbed onto the stranger's wrist, and together they exited out the backdoor.

The fight definitely grabbed some attention. Lukas stood watching you look around, soaking in the side eyes. Taking in a breath, you dusted yourself off and hopped back onto a barstool. The thick, moist, cigarette-dense air fell heavy in Lukas' lungs. He felt his heart drumming, his body hot from an excitement he couldn't surpress. Something about the way you fought hit him like ecstasy.

He wondered if your punch hurts.

Lost in the unprecedented euphoria, he could only gaze at you as some women came up and asked if you were okay. You reassurred them with a familiar smile, one he had seen you wore at work. Your voice was soft again as you thanked the chirpy crowd for their concerns.

Lukas didn't say anything to you that night. He went home and let the image of you and your victorious knuckle bruises lull him to sleep.

___

"Do you need me to find out who he is?"

Yuki wasn't happy when he asked that. The sight of your bandaged hand and the medical patch on your face stirred his stomach with guilt.

"No, of course not", you shook your head, "I'm fine! Really, it was nothing."

Yuki pursed his lips. The lunch he packed himself suddenly tasted like cardboard.

He tried to make it easier by reminding himself that at least Lukas didn't push to have lunch with you today. In fact, the guy had been stoic for the entire morning. Even though you weren't around, Lukas had somehow been working on his computer silently instead of sprawling on his chair like a slacker. Perhaps you had reminded him about his attitudes at work?

If you did, Yuki was impressed that the newbie knew to listen. He didn't think that kid would be the type to do so.

"Sakamoto, please don't worry. I had fun, and your set was great."

He looked down. He knew he wasn't directly to blame, though the guilt never went away- he was well-acquainted with this sort of harrassment. Right in his childhood home he had witnessed worse. What grated him the most was the silence afterward. The way his mother's frail form would hunch, casting a bent shadow on the shoji, her hands cupping her face. He was too young and small to do anything but stand in the hallway and watch as she eventually moved, mute and rigid. He heard the folds of her clothes creasing against one another and the floorboard barely creaking under her feet.

She couldn't have fought back. She was sickly. When he grew into his middle school uniform, Yuki tried to fight on her behalf but his teenage body bounced off his father's sturdy chest. His father was a merciless man, strong like the grey stone wall surrounding their mansion. Yuki remembered the disappointment in the old man's voice as he lamented "my only son is emotional like a woman, and weak like one, too."

"I see...", he said to you, his voice weary. He didn't know what else to say. He didn't want to bring up the fact that when he saw your tug of war, he let his hand slip across the strings, messing up the song. He had planned to jump off the stage, but his lead singer had tugged on his sleeve and eyed the bouncer who was already coming your way. What was there to tell you? He couldn't say that he had almost done something. Either he did something or he did nothing. In this case, he did nothing. Yuki tried to find solace in the fact that you held your own, but he couldn't. You shouldn't have to, not right in front of a friend.

Another wave of bitterness hit him when he remembered Lukas standing there watching, hesitant to interfere, tall and awkward like an useless telephone pole. Yuki wondered if he should bring Lukas up, but he decides against it. He didn't want you to feel worse - a friend and a junior watching you getting hit, that would not brighten anyone's day. He felt sorry for you to have to deal with two cowards.

Well, if he couldn't feel better, the least he could do was to keep you from feeling worse. He had been of no help with his stupid sad face. After all, this should not be about him. Yuki shamefully put his feelings in the corner as he tried to think of something that would cheer your up.

"Hey, would you like to check out a cat cafe this weekend with me?"

Your eyes lit up.

"Really?"

"Yeah. It's right down the street from where I live. I have been meaning to visit, but it would be awkward to go alone."

Yuki already visited. He liked their cakes and tea. Still, he saw no harm in a little white lie to make his invitation seem more natural. He would hate for you to get the idea that he felt obliged to make up for what happened. That would be a transactional spin on what was supposed to be a gesture of friendship.

"That would be so nice! I also was hoping to relax a little lately..."

The knot in his chest unraveled at that.

___

You were intimidated by Lukas' switch-up. Since morning, he was quiet. Upon seeing your bruises, he asked what happened, to which you gave a vague respond about tripping on the sidewalk. No more inappropriate attempts of flirting nor small talks - he appeared to be engrossed in the tasks you handed to him. You found it simultaneously nice and unnerving, so a part of you were glad that you were scheduled to teach until lunch. You were worried that if you were near him for too long, you wouldn't be able to resist asking him what triggered this change.

You thought of asking him to join you and Sakamoto for lunch, remembering the agreement you had made the day prior. Though, by the time you reached the lounge, he was getting ready to leave. "Please don't mind me", he said with an oddly soft smile, "I need to pick up something at the convenient store nearby. I hope you and Mr. Sakamoto have a good meal". His out of character veneered grin hit you like a brick.

By the time afternoon rolled by, Lukas occupied only a corner of your mind. You were mowing through the last days of school, teaching, writing, planning the end of year school festival. When you landed from the whirlwind and came back to the lounge for your last hour, you barely noticed the junior colleague who was still hunched over his laptop. Brushing past him, you got settled. Your tense body completely dropped its guards as you melted in your chair.

Your gaze met with a bottle of cold green tea in your cubicle. From the thin condensation, you figured it hadn't been around for long.

"Afternoon", Lukas' voice echoed from the other side of your corner, "you seemed tired. It's not much, but I hope you feel a little more refreshed drinking that."

"Mr. Lukas... it's so nice of you. I'm embarrassed to not have anything in return."

He didn't move to look at you.

"Don't mind it! You had a long day."

His tone was cool and distant, a long shot from the flirtatiousness you had to suffer so far.

"Really, thank you, Mr. Lukas. I do like this brand a lot, so this definitely made me feel better."

There was a quick pause before he spoke again: "I'm glad."

He moved at last, turning to you. You missed his gaze as you twisted open the cap and took a sip.

"If you don't mind, I would love your opinion on the powerpoints I made so far."

"Of course", you nodded, rolling your chair his way. He arched back, giving you the space to take a look

Your attention was on the mistakes he had made. You had a flaw: you were a perfectionist. Despite your lack of vocal reaction, you knew you could be critical when you saw someone take over your work incorrectly. It comes with expertise. Still, you had trained yourself to manage the uneasiness and maintain an encouraging attitude - something your close friends called "softening the blow".

You often forget, though, that your face could betray you.

"Okay, you did great so far", you said, neglecting to meet his eyes, "but I want to make some notes here. Would you mind?"

"Not at all."

For someone so surprisingly tough, you lacked an eye for details. You didn't see the look on him as he watched your hardening face and bandaged knuckle as if he was starving.

[bluelocksource]

Alexis Ness’ trivia (src: EGOIST BIBLE 2)

☆ Character's color: Magical Purple.

☆ Weapon : Illusion Cross.

☆ Birthday: 16th March.

☆ Current age: 18 (at the start of NEL).

☆ Zodiac: Pisces.

☆ Nickname: "The Magician"

☆ Birthplace: Hamburg, Germany.

☆ Family: Father. Mother. Older brother. Older Sister. Himself.

☆ Current height: 181 cm.

☆ Foot size: 28 cm.

☆ Dominant foot: Right.

☆ Blood type: AB.

☆ Visual acuity: 1.0

☆ Grip strength: 53 kg.

☆ Motto: "Magic resides in those who believe."

☆ Team: Bastard München.

☆ Starts playing football: At age 8. "First time I saw it in a stadium. I will never forget that football magic."

☆ Hobby: Discovering magic. "The world is filled with all kinds of magic!"

☆ Favorite food: Sachertorte. "The combo with whipped cream and coffee is the best!"

☆ Dislike/hated food: Herring pie. "My mom isn’t a great cook, and this one is especially terrible."

☆ What goes best with rice:  "Cheese curry, maybe. "

☆ Favorite animal: Flying squirrel. "It's cute and can fly—how fantastical!"

☆ Favorite season: Winter. "A clear winter sky makes feel like I could fly."

☆ Favorite movie: The Notebook.

☆ Favorite music: "The Rose" by Bette Midler.

☆ Favorite football player: Michael Kaiser.

☆ Favorite subject: Ethics & P.E.

☆ Weak subject: Maths & Physics.

☆ Mushroom shoots vs Bamboo shoots: "Probably mushroom. They have cute shape!"

☆ Ideal type: "A strong person who can control their solitude."

☆ Fixation: Lonely expressions. "It makes me feel like I can understand their solitude."

☆ What would make him happy: "When others share in my excitement."

☆ What would make him upset: "The denial of magic I believed in." 

☆ What he thinks his strength is: Valuing the invisible (feelings, wishes, thoughts).

☆ What he thinks his weakness is: Stubbornness. "Not bending on what I believe in (though I don’t really think of it as a weakness)."

☆ What made him cry recently: “I can’t remember. I cry often. My tear ducts are very sensitive... Hehe ♪”

☆ Usual sleeping hour: 6.5 hours.

☆ Number of chocolates received from previous Valentine: 10. "It seems they were delivered to my team! Thank you!"

☆ Place he washes first when taking a bath: His arms.

☆ What will he do if received 100 million yen: "I’d probably consult with Kaiser. I might say something like “I don’t need this crap,” though!"

☆ At what age he stops receiving presents from Santa: "I didn’t have that kind of thing at home. So I prepared my own stockings. Not that he ever came."

☆ What was his last wish from Santa: "Anything was fine. Anything at all."

☆ How he spent his holiday:  "Training with Kaiser. Eating with Kaiser. Shopping with Kaiser. With Kaiser... etc."

☆ What will he do during his last day on Earth: "I hope for a miracle so that day won’t actually be the last."

☆ Favorite historical figure: Joan of Arc.

☆ If he hadn't encountered soccer, what will he be doing: "I wonder if I would still believe in magic."

☆ If he could only take one thing to a deserted island, what would it be: "Kaiser. Wait, is a human not allowed? Then I don’t need anything."

☆ If he had a time machine, would he go to the past or the future: The past. "I would hug my younger self, who believed in magic and cried alone, and tell them, “It’s okay to be just as you are.”"

note: i want to apologize in advance for any mistake made in the translation!

[sluticxkeki]

⍣ ೋ something about you. t.kuroo

nsfw content! (fem reader!) time skip haikyuu!

every friday nights for kuroo was the best nights for him. after all he was a sports promoter so his job was stressful enough. so what did kuroo tetsuro do every friday nights? he would go to your job. you worked as a stripper, the most favorited girl there. and kuroo admired that about you. so he was surprised when you and him started hitting it off. a few lap dances, going out with each other, him giving you money and sending you money. and private rooms when he visits the strip club. but never sex! well until now.

so here we were sitting on the velvet couch, the lights dimmed down and a coffee table in front of him. you sitting next to him, your hands on his lap and his arm around you’re waist. him listening to you as you vent out your feelings. kuroo knew what he was doing. making you vent to him cause he wanted to get intimate with you after. so his plan was working so far.

“fuck your coworker.. she a hating ass hoe” he shook his head in disagreement. he looked over at you, his hand going to your cheek and caressing it softly. “you know that your amazing.. don’t you, doll?” he was charming and you fell for his trap. “thank you tetsuro” you softly smiled. oh how he loves when you call him by his first name.

“how about I get all these things off your mind hm?” his hand traveling up your exposed thighs. he really couldn’t keep his hands off of you. especially the outfit you were wearing, a black lingerie with fishnets and some red bottom heels that one of your customers bought you. you bit your lip and nodded. “please” you whispered lowly. you were desperate, horny and overall stressed and so was kuroo, which only made the vibe even more strong between the both of you. “let me fuck your guts out, baby” he whispered in your ear. you felt the middle of your legs get heated. you quickly nodded as he pulled you on top of him making you straddle his lap.

you both are making out, his hands roaming around your body as his hand stops at your ass. your arms are wrapped around his neck. as the kiss drifted away and kuroo kissing down your neck and sucking on it.

next thing you knew you were on all fours as kuroo was behind you plumping his cock in his hand. he then moved your panties to side and ripped your fishnets apart making your eyes widened. “hey! those were my favorite!” you said. “i’ll buy you more, baby” he groaned as he slapped your ass making you squeal.

“are you ready?..” he asked you. “mhm” you bit your lip and nodded your head. you were nervous this was the first time you let any of your costumers. but kuroo.. it was something about him that made your pussy throb for him. he slowly entered his mushroom tip in your pussy making you arch your back.

you felt a whimper escape your lips. he was big and you knew it. he slowly pushed his full length in your gummy walls. he couldn’t believe the feeling of your tight pussy. he knew he was already hooked as the way you squeezed him. he bit down his moan. “move kuroo.. p-please” you begged him. his ego boosted and started slamming his hips against yours. usually he would try and be gentle but your pussy got him so excited that he couldn’t wait.

the noises your pussy made, glistening and gushing was driving him crazy. your loud moans filling the room along with the slapping skin. “o-oh fuck! fuck fuck!” you whined out from his cock kissing your cervix. “you like that, baby?” he said out of breath as he slapped your ass.

“y-yeah tetsu!” you moaned out. he smirked and kept pounding into you relentlessly. you never had a cock like this in your life. so obviously you were hooked on his. you wish you could’ve done this sooner.

he pulled you hair pulling your head up, making you look at the mirror in front of you both. him behind you pounding into you and your face was smeared with your makeup already. “look how beautiful you look” he whispered in your ear. your eyes rolled back making kuroo chuckle lowly. he let go of your hair stuffing your face into the couch pillows and pounding into you faster. making you scream and moan.

“c-cum for me babygirl.” he moaned deeply. “cmon cum for me babydoll. cum on this cock!” he traveled his hand down to your clit and started rubbing it in circular motions making you want to cum even faster.

“I-i’m! cumming kuroo!” you screamed and whined as he felt your walls tightening his cock making him reach his limit as well. “yeah? cum on this cock” he slapped your ass again and suddenly felt your hot cum coating his cock as you cried in pleasure. “s-so fucking good f’me doll!”

yeah there was something about you that got him hooked from this hookup.

got a request? put it in :3

tags: @jaegersangel @leahrintarou

[sorceresssundries]

A Spirit of Determination

I wrote a piece for my wonderful friend @callmethebrightness.

I had a go at re-writing the 'making it official' scene from the game. Not a criticism of the writing, I just wanted to try something different <3 SFW

Pairing: Lucanis x Female Rook

Word Count: 1.8k

Sei la ragione di ogni mio sorriso you are the source of all my smiles

The room smelled of hazelnut, coffee, and smouldering wood. The hearth crackled, breathing out licks of fire into the dining room, making the eyes of the stone wolves guarding it flicker amber and gold.

Cora watched from the shadows, smirking and silent, as Lucanis busied himself in the kitchen—humming quiet tunes she didn’t recognise, punctuating the melody with occasional tuts and mutters of  mierda whenever a pot bubbled over. He seemed happy. The knife in his hand moved with practiced ease as he chopped and peeled. The rhythmic thrum of a quick, sharp blade against the chopping board was a marked change from its usual purpose. He was content. “You’re lurking,” he said, his voice even, his attention never wavering from his task. She stepped out of the shadows, letting the firelight play across her figure to soften all her sharp edges. Lucanis turned his attention to her at last. For the hundredth time—or perhaps the thousandth—he was struck by her. She filled the space effortlessly, drawing all the firelight to herself, as if it were a privilege for it to pull her out of the darkness.

For a fleeting moment, he considered telling her so. But the words tangled themselves in his chest, as they always did. Instead, he drank her in, silently cataloging the curl of her smirk, the gleam in her eyes, and the way she held herself like she owned the room—and him. She was breathtaking, as always, and utterly untouchable. “You hum while you cook,” she crooned. The sound rolled down his spine, burrowing under his skin, curling into his senses. It made it impossible to focus on anything but her. The way she spoke—her words always either an invitation or a challenge—never failed to leave him distracted. He wondered, not for the first time, what her teasing might sound like if he captured it with his mouth, pulled it from her lips until all she could do was sigh. “I do not.” “You do.” The smirk on her lips widened just slightly, and for a heartbeat, the kitchen disappeared. There was only her, standing there in the firelight, daring him to a duel he wasn’t sure he could win. He wasn’t certain he wanted to. “You’ll never be able to prove it,” he said. She moved closer, curiosity evident as she nosed around his workspace, leaning just enough to peek at his progress. Lucanis went back to chopping, determined not to let the warmth of her proximity or the faint scent of her distract him. But she possessed her own gravity, tugging at his focus, especially as she poked her head around and studied the ingredients spread before him. “What are you making?” she asked, her tone deceptively innocent. “Paella for the main course. Hazelnut torte for dessert,” he replied smoothly, though his lips twitched when she raised a skeptical eyebrow. “I thought you were making mushroom risotto?” “That was the plan,” he admitted, pausing to glare at the empty jar that had once held his prized mushrooms. “But some little thief raided my stores.” Cora’s lips parted in exaggerated shock. “Oddio! A robbery! In our own home! I must alert Neve immediately. A full investigation is warranted!” With great dramatic flair, she draped an arm across her brow and leaned forward, collapsing against the counter with a tragic sigh. Lucanis glanced at her, one brow arched, but he ignored her antics with practiced ease. Still, he felt Spite’s pull at the traitorous corner of his mouth, tugging upward into a smirk. He liked her like this. They both did. “No investigation needed,” he said dryly. “I already know the culprit. The mushrooms were fed to that feathered nuisance. Do you have any idea how much those cost me? And to use them as treats for that goose.” He made a noise of disgust. Cora’s eyes sparkled with barely contained laughter. “He’s just a baby.” “He’s a goose,” Lucanis shot back, his tone flat. “Always honking and leaving feathers everywhere.” “It’s more of a squawk than a honk,” she said breezily. “And I’m sure Davrin plans to replace the mushrooms.” “It’s not Davrin,” Lucanis snapped. “It’s his accomplice—the other goose.” Her eyes widened in mock horror. “There’s another goose?” “Yes, the one that hisses.” “Manfred?!” Lucanis sighed heavily, his shoulders sagging under the weight of indignation. “I’ve tried to talk to Emmrich, but it’s always an excuse: ‘He’s just curious,’ he says. ‘He’s learning to care for Assan,’ he says.” Lucanis muttered darkly under his breath. “But he knows. He gets away with it every time. Always hissing at me smugly, like a goose.” “Well,” Cora mused, biting her lip to suppress the laughter, “to be fair, hissing is sort of his thing. Who would’ve thought? The mighty Demon of Vyrantium, bested by a baby griffon and his skeleton friend.” She couldn’t hold it in any longer. Laughter spilled out of her in rivulets. Lucanis groaned, though he couldn’t entirely banish the smirk that ghosted across his face.

He was a changed man, far more relaxed now than when he’d first arrived. Cora had made a point to give him space—at least in the beginning. Initially, she’d watched him out of caution, gauging whether he posed a threat. But over time, her vigilance had shifted into something else entirely; an enjoyable habit. She noticed how he was graceful and kind in the small ways that often slipped by too quickly. He brought thoughtful gifts from the market, leaving them in people’s rooms without a word. Everyone’s room except hers. For her, he waited till she found him. She had puzzled over that for weeks before realising the truth—the fish tank made him uncomfortable. He cooked meals he knew others loved, even if he disliked them himself. He had learned more vegetarian recipes for Emmrich and embraced the delicacies of the melting pot of cultures that had gathered at the lighthouse. He made sure to cook meals for Taash that would soothe their throat after a day of breathing fire. Harding believed the plants in her room were enchanted, thriving without water—but Cora knew better. It was Lucanis who tended them when Harding wasn’t looking, a quiet ritual he carried out without seeking credit. She wondered if these acts of care were his way of surviving, of pushing back against Spite, or if they were simply part of his soul. Cora could see the thoughts he never said aloud. He believed Spite had made a home within him because he’d always carried enough space to make room for all that anger. That the Demon of Vyrantium had been the perfect vessel for a demon like Spite. And perhaps, on some level, he thought he deserved it. But she believed differently. She thought Lucanis survived because of his determination. Not the cold, relentless kind that drove gods to war or the wronged to revenge, but the quiet, stubborn resolve to remain kind despite everything. Despite the Ossuary. It wasn’t magic in the traditional sense—Lucanis wasn’t a mage. But Cora thought it was the strongest magic she’d ever seen: the strength to endure, to care, and to choose kindness when the world had given him every reason to do otherwise. “Have you just come in here to torment the chef?” He asked, turning down the heat on the stove and turning to face her fully. “Something like that.” She grinned, and moved to dip her finger into the warm pan that smelled like heaven. “Ah, careful. You will scald yourself.” Lucanis batted her hand away, then dipped a spoon into the pot, scooping up a small portion of rich, velvety cream, and held it out to her, blowing on it before it could reach her lips.

“Chocolate cream to go with dessert—try.”

She hesitated only for a moment before stepping closer, the scent wrapping around her like a heavy cloak. As she leaned in, her lips brushed the edge of the spoon, and the creamy warmth melted onto her tongue. The flavor was intoxicating -  a perfect blend of cocoa and cream that sent shivers down her spine. She thought she could also taste a hint of Antivan brandy. She closed her eyes, and a soft, involuntary moan escaped her lips. The sound was sinful. Her eyes snapped open as she realized what she had done, and a flush spread across her neck. He was gazing at her as though she was a decadence herself, and for a moment, she expected him to kiss her. Instead, he laughed. The sound startled her, deep and unrestrained, full of something so genuine it caught her off guard. It was beautiful - kind and rich and utterly disarming. A laugh so full and unguarded that it left her momentarily stunned. “You’re laughing at me!” she exclaimed, her cheeks still burning, though she couldn’t help but smile at his sheer joy. “Yes,” he said simply, his laughter gradually softening into a warm, lingering smile. He stepped forward and, lightly, allowed his hand to brush her waist, and he leaned in to inhale the scent of her hair and allow himself a moment of indulgence. “Sei la ragione di ogni mio sorriso,” he murmured. Before she could process the weight of his words, he stepped back, his touch lingering for the barest moment before he turned away, his composure firmly back in place. Lucanis wanted to kiss her. More than anything. That kind of want—it was dangerous, a wildfire he had no control over. And with that wanting came Spite, and the feel of his demon’s wings unfurling. His sneer slithered through him, venomous and mocking, a reminder that his happiness was the one contract he would never be able to claim. He was here now. Cora could see it in the way Lucanis changed. The warmth in his face cooled like dying embers, his posture bracing as if against an oncoming storm. The softness she had coaxed from him was gone, replaced by a distant, haunted glaze in his eyes. She knew too well what filled his ears - the venomous whispers, the sharp claws raking at him, pulling him away from her. Cora tilted his face toward her, her gaze unwavering. What she saw broke her heart: a man with an apology etched in every line of his face.

“We’ll fix it,” she said simply, her voice steady, as though the demon in his mind was no more than a thorn to be plucked. To her, the battle he fought was not an insurmountable curse. It was a challenge to overcome. And Lucanis—Lucanis believed her. Because she was Incoronata de Riva, and he believed her capable of anything. But until that day came, until he was certain it was safe, he would not allow her to be touched by Spite.

And so, she would not be touched by him.

[twisted-wonderland-shenanigans]

Humans have the tendency to put poisonous plants in their mout and enjoy eating it ( coffee and anything that has effects of being spicy like chili peppers and weirdly we have the habit to eat things that are not good for us )

Like imagine anyone seeing the local human eating grapes out in the open or trying to make coffee?

Better yet eating chili peppers they found and make it part of their lunch

It'll be wild

If it looks edible, humans will put it in their mouth. That’s a fact of life—but not exactly a good idea sometimes! :V

Put a human in a world full of humanoid monsters where certain foods are toxic or can give them really bad tummy aches? You’ll either get a human complaining about a craving for something not readily available, or you’ll get this:

Yuu: *glancing around before sneakily eating bag of grapes*

Sebek: “Human! What are you eating?!”

Yuu: *freezes, shoving the grapes in their mouth before taking off at top speed*

Sebek: “HUMAN!! Get back here!!!”

*two hours later*

Ace: “Did you have to chase them up a tree?”

Sebek: “It’s not as if I intended to do so! The human shouldn’t have been hiding what they were eating in the first place. They are not a chipmunk!”

Yuu: *sitting on a branch high up, eating more grapes* “This is fine.”

Jack: “Wait, where did that bag come from?”

//----//

Granted, moments like these will calm down quite a bit once it’s clear that Yuu is—in fact—safe. But if the local human happens to be allergic to certain ingredients or foods, they’d better be prepared for quick hands swiping their food or getting tackled and rushed to the nurse’s office/the researchers. When the discovery that some monster students possess human DNA, this opens up a whole new world of food possibilities for them to try! In a supervised environment of course, and more on a volunteer basis just to ensure student safety.

Otherwise, Yuu will gain some snack buddies! 😃

Now, when it comes to mini!Yuu, as all little kids do, it’s highly likely that the toddler will try to put random things in their mouth.

//----//

Mini!Yuu: *playing in Jade and Floyd’s room, climbing up on Jade’s desk while Floyd isn’t looking and picking up a mushroom* “Oooh.” *goes to put it in mouth*

Floyd: “Eh, Shrimpy, what’s—Shrimpy, no!!” *bolts over and grabs the mushroom, holding it high over his head* “Don’t eat that!”

Mini!Yuu: “Why?”

Floyd: “Because mushrooms are disgusting. Bleck!”

Jade: *walks in carrying a small terrarium* “I thought I heard a commotion. Did something happen while I was away for a moment?”

Floyd: “Jade, little Shrimpy almost ate one of your mushrooms! Didn’t Azul tell you to keep your stuff away from them?”

Jade: “They did, did they? Oh my…I was only gone for a minute. Fufufu…well, it’s wonderful knowing that you were watching out for them, though I assure you that this particular mushroom is perfectly safe. It is a pearl oyster mushroom, one of the most commonly used in cooking. I had hoped to make a small terrarium of perfectly safe and non-toxic mushrooms for our dear little Yuu.”

Mini!Yuu: “I wanna try the mushy!”

Jade: “Of course, little one. Would you like to help me build your terrarium?”

Mini!Yuu: “Yes!”

Floyd: *groans*

//----//

And thus began the tiny toddler’s first part of the collection of terrariums and Floyd suffering. Jade’s just happy to have someone who will listen to him talk about mushrooms and plants he finds in the mountains, even if they don’t understand half of what he says! X’D

Anyway, as you can imagine, taking care of a child who doesn’t know what’s good and safe for them is difficult. Especially since—as any parent would tell you—it’s when you look away for just one split second that things can happen to a kid. Hence, why for some of them (Jamil, Vil, Rook, Trey, Jack, Crewel, and Trein), they’re able to just calmly reach over and snatch the dangerous food or object and replace it with something safer.

Then there are those who might end up freaking out/panicking. Funny to reminisce over, but not so funny in the moment 😂

[lady-bluebird-luv]

wip wednesday

happy WW!

Finally, I met the guest’s amber eyes. “You must be Helion.”

He inclined his head. “You look much better than you did during our last meeting, Cursebreaker.”

“Helion.” Rhys said.

I laughed. “I could say the same to you – to all of Prythian, really. You’re welcome.”

Helion guffawed. “I see you’ve made yourself at home in the Night Court.” He piled his plate with melon slices. “It’s customary to bow to a High Lord of Prythian, you know.”

I poured myself a cup of coffee – a delicacy on the continent, Rhys had explained, common in the Night Court because of our sea trade along the channel between Prythian’s north coast and the mainland kingdoms. Duties on coffee sales inside the Night Court, as well as with other courts, was a large portion of the Night Court’s lucrative mercantile dealings.

“Will you be the first one who orders me to?” I asked Helion.

Helion’s eyebrows shot up. “No.” He glanced at Rhys.

Rhys smirked into his coffee. “If you want to ask Feyre to do anything she’s opposed to, you’ll be disappointed.”

“So you have learned that,” I jabbed.

Helion looked back in his chair, appraising us for a long moment. Rhys met his gaze, and whatever Helion read in his expression made his lips part in what might have been surprise – until it transformed into a lion’s smile. “I missed you these past few decades, Rhys.”

Helion peered at the excess of fruits, cheeses and juices which had the table groaning under their weight. “I don’t suppose you have anything stronger than coffee, do you?”

Rhys snorted. “Those days are still over for me, I’m afraid.”

“Not even brandy?” Helion prompted.

“Oh, that we do have.”

Rhys snapped his fingers, and a crystal decanter half-full of sloshing, caramel liquid appeared between the yogurt and the mangos.

Helion poured himself a glass and topped it off with a splash of coffee. He grinned at my expression. “Surely this isn’t the most shocking thing you’ve seen on this side of the wall.”

“No,” I agreed, “but I remain surprised by High Lords’ capacity for frivolity.”

Helion chuckled again. “After your first century, you’ll do much the same.” Helion gestured to Rhys with the noticeably-emptier bottle. “When we were your age, we’d sneak away from court proceedings to eat mushrooms we found in the woods.”

“Some of them make you hear colors,” Rhys clarified.

“And taste sounds,” Helion supplied. “We’d take off our clothes and lay down in the lush, mountain meadows -,”

“Take off your clothes?” I demanded.

“The mushrooms make you do that, sometimes, too,” Helion confirmed. “It’s quite transcendent, especially when the sun warms your face and the dew is cool on your-,”

“It’s not transcendent when your father catches you,” Rhys muttered into his coffee. 

“Well,” Helion purred, “that wasn’t what upset him.”

[mangora]

I’m so tired here are some assorted Disventure Camp headcanons:

•Jake is really into poetry. Some of his poems are bangers, some of them are absolute dogshit. He posts some of them online, mostly the bad ones because he’s not self-aware of how bad they are. He will spend hours on end writing in his notes app. Guy is a big fan of sonnets and free verse but his strong suits are odes and villanelles

•Rosa María, James, Yul, Lake, Riya, Fiore, and Alec are all multilingual. Rosa speaks English and Spanish, James speaks Portuguese and English, Yul speaks Korean and English, Lake speaks German and English as well as some French, Riya speaks Hindi and English, Fiore speaks English and some Italian, and Alec speaks English as well as a variety of other languages (he did a minor in linguistics for his university degree so he knows the basics of multiple major languages).

•Hunter’s a competitive chess player. Ally’s the only person who’s ever beat him fair and square, but even then, that rarely happens

•Lake is great at baking. She’s incredibly exact when it comes to measurements, timing, and technique. Rosa, meanwhile, is a great cook and she doesn’t measure anything

•Aiden can play bass guitar. He started learning as a teenager because he wanted to join an emo band one day. Chase your dreams boy

•Yul used to have braces and he’s really embarrassed about it

•Gabby’s a forager, she loves to forage for wild fruit and mushrooms and greens

•Ellie’s kinda a ghoul in the kitchen. Like she can make good food and drinks but most of the time she’s so tired that she makes evil energy drink-instant coffee potions or like that pistachio & condensed milk concoction from Arthur

•In a better universe I think Ellie and Jake are frenemies instead of fully hating each other and they play Minecraft together and Ellie is constantly stealing Jake’s shit and trying to defeat the Ender Dragon meanwhile he screams every time he sees a Creeper and begs her to turn Keep Inventory on because he keeps dying

•Miriam gets a cat after the show. She’s an older white cat named Snowball and she has the same personality as her. They are best friends and Miriam is so annoyed by her. She made them matching sweaters. Snowball is only fully nice to Jake

•Fiore listens to Thrash Metal. It’s partially just to throw people off when they find out, she thinks it’s funny

•Fiore also enjoys those YouTube prank videos, she knows they’re fake they’re just so stupid that she finds them hilarious. Kristal gives her an iPad for a day one time for entertainment and it pisses the rest of the Magenta team off so bad because she keeps playing these prank videos and watching epic fail compilations at full volume

•Grett loves crocheting. She slowly turns into one of those people who crochets during lectures and while watching movies and shit

•James is really good at Tetris

•Ally is obsessed with Sci-Fi. She, Tess, and Hunter watch Star Trek, Doctor Who, and Star Wars together because they all love the worldbuilding so much. Tess writes fanfiction about almost everything they watch. Hunter has terrible media literacy and misses the themes every time but he has fun watching

•After All Stars, Riya gets really into tattoos. She gets matching ones with Connor

•People antagonize Tom with the cop slide video and every time he clenches his fist and goes, “Stop laughing at him.”

•Kai has a bunch of pet bugs. Maggy’s secretly afraid of them still but she’s getting there. She likes rollie pollies

•Karol used to do roller derby and Lill used to ice skate. Ggirlf,riends,,, I miss them chat. Where is my old woman yuri

•Aiden eats plain yogurt nothing on it and it’s the one thing James doesn’t like about him. Like it’s so upsetting to him. Why does he eat plain yogurt

•Ashley likes hyperpop, don’t tell anyone

•Tom likes crockpot food. He is not invited to potlucks for this reason. He will always bring the crockpot

•Alec doesn’t like splatter films but he really enjoys psychological horror, especially mockumentaries and mondo films

•Lake read creepypasta a lot as a kid and she wouldn’t go into the kitchen after dark because she was afraid of Jeff the Killer appearing at her fridge

[mellowyellow236]

So I’m writing my Chinese New Year fic and I’m realizing that I’m saying things about Yuri that are going to sound like surprises when they… Really shouldn’t be. So here’s a fun fact sheet for her.

Yuri’s favorite foods are stir-fry and hot pots. She likes noodles and meat, and her favorite vegetables are carrots and mushrooms (not technically a vegetable but still). She enjoys ramen as well, but it’s too much trouble for her to make it from scratch most days and she finds that the instant stuff isn’t as good as if she just made one of the other dishes.

Her favorite sweets are mochi. She especially likes green tea, coffee, and red bean mochi.

Yuri’s favorite shows are reality television/dating shows (Say Yes to the Dress and The Bachelor/The Bachelorette) and old movies in both the romance and comedy genres (The Princess Bride and Animal House)

Yuri used to work as an actress/idol. She started off acting as a kid, but gradually became more and more idol-like as she got older. She often acts very innocently to those she first meets, and comes off as very overly “cute”.

She’s good at manipulating people and will often do it to get whatever she wants. In the OG timeline with her, the only people who see through it are Leona, Vil, and Neige. Leona because he’s as good at reading people as she is, and Vil/Neige because they’re from the entertainment industry and know about how it works.

Yuri is pansexual and polyamorus.

Yuri is not a woman! She uses she/her pronouns because that’s what she’s always used and it’s better to use in the entertainment industry since she looks more like a woman when she has clothes on, but she’s actually intersex and possesses both male and female anatomy. So, she doesn’t care what she’s referred to as. This only makes sense if you know more in-depth lore, but that fact is also why she’s the only one of her siblings to be able to go to NRC.

Yuri has a sweet tooth, but she’s honestly pretty over-sweet things due to how often she ate them for the camera. If given the choice, she’ll choose something that’s a mix between savory and sweet.

Yuri loves traveling. Her goal, pre-NRC, was to give her mother most of the money she made in acting as a kid, take the royalties, go to college in Europe somewhere, and then travel the world.

Yuri was raised in Japan by her mother after she moved there at about two but is actually ethnically Chinese (in terms of her human biology, more on that if you’ve ever read my intro post for her mother)

Yuri is bilingual! She speaks Chinese (Mandarin and Cantonese mostly, expanded on later), Japanese, English, and a bit of Korean, in order of when she learned them. She is also a citizen of both Japan and the US.

Due to the fact her mother only spoke in the same manner she learned when she was growing up many, many years ago, Yuri often speaks Cantonese. However, she can understand and read Mandarin, and knows “simplified chinese”. She could carry on a conversation with someone who speaks most dialects, but she can only respond in Cantonese and a bit of Mandarin if needed.

She’s a child of not divorce, technically, but definitely… Kind of divorce. Her mother caught the eye of a rich guy when she came to Japan who she quickly married and who adopted her kids. He then divorced her three years later to go live with his children in Germany after his mistress died, but Yue (Yuri’s mom) still gets child support.

Yuri was mostly homeschooled by her mother, despite attending a normal school, because she missed so much to do acting and singing and modeling. So she got a formal education, just from her mom, meaning that she’s actually much more proficient in speaking Cantonese than Japanese.

Despite almost always dating someone pre-NRC, Yuri is deathly afraid of commitment and would commonly ghost people after they dated for a few months because she got cold feet.

[abyssalribbons]

I choose to believe that everyone in the party knows how to cooks, but everyone except for Bonnie is a different flavor of bad.

Siffrin is really good at using whatever he can find and throwing together a meal. He's especially good with wild game and foraged berries and mushrooms. However, they've only had to look after themself for most of their life, and as a result never had reason to carry spices around and often forget to use them. This results in Siffrin's food is bland, but decent enough.

Mirabelle struggles with the technical skills of cooking. We already know from canon that she had some bad knife skills. So I imagine hers chopping is slow and uneven. She takes a long time to make anything. Also, I could see her trying new things with a recipe, mixing and matching ingredients, and I can't imagine it always turns out.

Isabeau has memorized exactly five recipes and cooks the same ones in a cycle. They're the food that he feels are safe, but putting him on chef duty means everyone gets bored of the same stuff over and over. Also, he gives everyone way too big of servings. He gets in trouble from Bonnie for making too much because they don't have room for all those leftovers.

Odile refuses to cook for the party. She can do it, but she has the habit of pulling together the absolute worst depression meals you have ever seen. She's fully capable of cooking a full meal, it is just too much effort when they are better things she could be doing. Odile is the type of person who's breakfast consists of a coffee and one singular piece of unbuttered bread. At least to me.

And then there's Bonnie, professional (not yet professional) chef cooker.

[2willowlane]

i've been posting silly crack fanfiction on ao3 lately, and i decided to just upload this on my tumblr. it's inspired off of interstellartoaster's kalampokiphobia: fear of corn, and the mods harvey's irrational apple hatred and harvey hates apples.

fantastic works; mind you.

gender neutral reader, sfw; not really focused on romance, as it is just absurdity

tallying his profit, of which was a big fat zero, harvey sighed; pushing up his glasses. it's been a rather long week for him, considering no one wants to buy those energy tonic muscle whatever medication that he supplies. the only time that anyone has ever purchased such a redundant item from him, was whenever they misclick- accidentally bought it; and then just sold it again. the only way that he'll ever make a good buck out of his pharmaceutical care was if he just eradicated the valley's food supply... of which, did sound tempting, but harvey loves his pickles too much to give them up.

there haven't been any appointments placed recently, so he was having a hard time trying to keep up with the expenses. right now, he could so go for a bottle of fine wine... maybe it's because he's spending too much of his expenses on plane models, rather than actually trying to keep up with all of the financial records, like an actual adult should. huh, what a foreign concept. well, he's just going to go continue complaining about his money situation, until further notice.

with the door opening, he had to them correct his shrimp posture, as he then greeted you, the almost superhuman farmer, into the clinic. normally, you just like to go behind the counter and access rooms that are off-limits to regular patients, but there was something about your gumption that made you so lovable. even if you do tend to barge into private examinations, there was something that made you feel so rebellious; that harvey couldn't help but swoon over you! also, he's a pathetic beanpole of a man, so he'll probably get pummeled into the ground by your combat prowess if he ever rejects your blatant non-filtered view of what "personal space" meant.

you were about to get some items turned into the community center; as you were carrying a basket full of assorted goods (they ranged from something simple to five highly-graded melons, a still-flopping ghostfish, and poisonous mushrooms). oh well, with the poisonous mushrooms, those are harvey's choice of decoration during the autumn seasons; so, the doctor felt rather seen whenever he saw those clumped together. he grimaced at the fish, however. other than that, he was glad to see a good friend pop in now and then; he needed something to spice up his days, and he can always expect you at around 9am, or somehow always being in the places he's trying to go to... coincidence?

normally, you'd stop on buy and get him a coffee. either you've brewed it yourself, or stopped by gus', it was coffee. you wonder how many mugs harvey has, considering you also gift him a free cup alongside the sweet, sweet ground bean liquid. it really wasn't the healthiest thing to drink due to the sugar and caffeine levels, and you were pretty worried for the guy who has been through years and years of intensive schooling to know better about those dietary concerns. you assume he probably only has a cup twice a week, considering you have some type of intergalactic force keeping you from extending that quota.

you had some apples somewhere on your person, and it was probably the only thing he'd like; you'd figure. after all, they're just funky little guys. who doesn't like a good, crisp apple? even though they're supposed to be for the community center, you can always just get one later. you'd give harvey something else, but you decided that he deserved better than just countless upon countless liters of his favourite brew. you knew harvey appreciated a good foraged, natural good—especially with someone locally grown on your acres. fishing out an apple out of your pockets, you then present it to him.

"... i think i may be allergic to this."

as harvey looked like a sad shih tzu puppy, looking off to the side, your heart sank. he was allergic to apples? at first, you really wanted to make fun of him. he seemed like the type of person who'd be allergic to peanut butter, and be the kid that doesn't allow their classmates to bring in anything homemade due to those medical reasons. holding the red delicious apple in your hands, rotating it around in your palm, you decided to test that theory.

"may?" you inquiried, and with a look of horror, harvey began to shudder. yes, he's an anxious man at heart, but due to various interesting cases at the clinic, he's grown insensitive to many things. plus, he's in front of the one and only farmer(tm), and his crush. god, what an embarrassment he is. he didn't want to talk about his irrational hatred for apples; those disgusting overblown flower ovaries called "fruit" just sicken him to death, not to mention that the apples were the first to hate HIM—it wasn't his fault that his body rejects them!

"yes, yes! just- just get it away from me!"

"i don't believe you..."

and that's where you've learnt that the phrase "an apple a day keep the doctor away" was right.

[fernthewhimsical]

Baduhenna Deep Dive: pt 3

Correspondences:

🌿 Animals: crows, ravens and wolves

🌿 Crystals/Rocks: garnet, haematite, deep amethyst, hag stones

🌿 Flowers/Plants: ferns, mushrooms, moss, deep forests, mugwort, foxglove

🌿 Food/Drink: dark chocolate, rare meat, mushrooms, fern heads, root vegetables, herbs, coffee

🌿 Moon phases: new moon, especially dark moon or eclipse

🌿 Magic: activism, protection, to stand your ground, to take the offence, forest, herbal, hedge riding, divination

🌿 Nature: deep dark forests, mist, wetlands, crows

Ways to honour her:

⚔️ Offer your battle cry

⚔️ Dedicate your workout

⚔️ Learn new magic techniques

⚔️ Go on a spirit journey to visit her

⚔️ Donations to charity, especially those helping the oppressed

⚔️ Learn the Frisian runes and communicate with her

Other info:

I celebrate her on the 28th of February. I chose the 28th because the battle was in the year 28CE, and then chose February not really for a reason. I also connect her with the Samhain season, although not really with Samhain per se.

Since so little is known of her, there are other deities, spirits and entities that have helped me form a picture of her and connect with her. These are: the Morrígan, the Valkyrie, Morgan le Fey, and the Raven Queen/Matron of Ravens of Critical Role

I honour her on the New Moons by making an offering to her

She was instrumental in figuring out my gender identity

I see her and the Morrígan as family, a mother/daughter relationship

[Deep Dive Masterpost]

[auckie]

Ok no actually I wanna hear your Trader Joe’s opinions I’m really into the orange strawberry banana juice, the bruschetta sauce, the cranberry lime juice sparkling water and cinnamon schoolbook cookies

You and I agree on the CLSW (cranlime sparkling), haven’t tried the others but I’ll look into them. The normal lime one is also amazing on its own, as well as a mixer for both alcoholic and non alcoholic drinks. Summer must!

There’s so much shit I’m obsessed with, I’ll try and list the most important ones

English crumpets

Mango kefir

Brown sugar oat creamer

Chocolate oat milk

Simpler wines brand sparkling white canned wine

Pfeffernüsse

Chocolate babka

Brioche sliced bread

Danish Kringle

Pinks and whites shortbread cookies

Joe Joe’s gluten free classic Oreo knock off cookie

Madras lentils (boxed kind is good too)

Canned giant baked beans in tomato sauce

The non joes brand oat milk coffee and kombucha but you can get those anywhere

Their candles, two in one grapefruit mint hair wash (I despise two in one products but this one doesn’t foam and is more of a cleansing conditioner I use in between shampoo and regular conditionings), and many other non food items. I’ve bought their towels, seasonal decor (usually those felt garlands), face lotions and oils. Loved all of them. Usually I only restock on the lotion, hand soap, and lavender laundry bags. Their detergent is nice tho, and I’ve also gotten their wool laundry balls but you really only ever gotta buy them like once. They also usually have pretty cute cards at the checkout! I like their cheaper flowers too, but there’s also a lot of very cute seasonal items they carry that I just can’t justify buying bc of price (have you seen their felt sunflowers? So adorable)

Simpler times potato chips

Crispy Crunchy Champignon Mushroom Snack

Fruit leather bars

Dried orange rings

Lox (labeled as smoked salmon iirc)

Both their Tunisian and kalamata olive oil

Vodka sauce

Roasted red pepper and tomato canned soup

Canned vegetable soup

Gone bananas chocolate covered frozen bananas (gone berry crazy strawberries are good too but like a dollar or two more expensive)

Jasmine rice in the frozen isle

Lime popsicles

Steak and stout meat pie

Pastry Bites Feta Cheese & Caramelized Onions

Canned tuna*

*especially with the gluten free microwaveable mac n cheese (I’m not gluten free if you’ve noticed, I literally just prefer some of their gluten free products. Same with the oat milk. I’m not lactose free but I just really like it)

Most of the frozen wontons I’ve tried

Chimichurri rice (goes great with the aforementioned roasted red pepper box soup, and chopped onions, green peppers, and spinach cooked in a wok)

Chicken sausage

Butternut squash gnocchi, iirc the potato gnocchi is good too

Most of their dried pastas

Almond and chocolate filled frozen croissants

The bars of chocolate you find at the check out that come in packs of threes

The weird meat sticks at the checkout too

Frozen hashbrowns

For whatever reason, their frozen green beans and asparagus is so much better than other generic brands I’ve tried

Any of the canned olives but esp the kalamata

Sun dried tomatoes

The produce is okay, a little pricey but they had brown Mexican tomatoes once that fucked hard. The herbs trustworthy too but really where is it not

Any of their chocolate covered nuts

Their fucked up chocolate covered chips, sometimes found in their snack mixes

Peanut butter pretzel snacks

Their dried seaweed isn’t my fav, but it’s not bad. I think it’s overpriced tho but tbf I usually get huuuge, less flavored packs from Costco

Pine nuts but good Gd are they expensive

They have cute, weird heirloom hybrid squashes during the fall a lot too that are pretty tasty

Things I’ve gotten from there that I hated? I didn’t like their orange chicken, ANY of the cereals I’ve gotten from there oddly enough, their pecorino Romano only comes grated and mixed iirc and I didn’t care for it. Some of their beers have made me scowl but also those are all random brands. But their wine (yes, even SHAW. But shoutout to coco bon red blend and blue fin moscato RIP!) has never does me wrong…except for any other flavor of the simpler wines canned ones. I can only do the sparkling white and literally no else I've forced to drink it has liked it! some of their salads have done me wrong. the canned chickpeas and dolmas were off. and some of their pricy juice mixes left me a bit disappointed.

[vixstarria]

✨Prepare for an unsolicited info dump✨

I was tagged by @herdarkestnightelegance - thanks!

Do you make your bed? Yes, always - I might leave other things lying around, but the bed is the no. 1 thing that always gets done - otherwise the bedroom looks too messy and irks me

Favorite number? I don't have a favourite number.

What’s your job? So... I work in a small law firm as the person who does everything but provide legal advice. Accounts, IT, HR, admin, random paralegal stuff - I'm your guy (gn). No one at work really knows exactly what it is I do, but they generally assume I'm always busy, which provides ample opportunity to shitpost on tumblr during work hours. E.g. right now. I love my job.

If you could go back to school would you? Absolutely not, I still have PTSD and recurring nightmares about school. I mean, I don't mind learning, per se, but I would strongly prefer it to be on my own terms, remote, and outside of a formal academic environment. And definitely not in the country I grew up and went to school in.

Can you parallel park? Strangely enough, yes. I do note that I do not have a license, however.

Do you think aliens are real? There has to be alien life of some kind out there, but it won't be little green men in blinking flying saucers. ...Although then again, hey, within the infinity of the universe, maybe there ARE little green men in saucers as well, somewhere, who knows?

Can you drive a manual car? Strictly within the confines of an empty parking lot - sure

What’s your guilty pleasure? Oh gosh, of what kind? Food - spicy ramen noodles with a bunch of stuff (mushrooms, egg, etc) thrown in. I love it, but I swear I immediately gain a kg any time I have a bowl. Music - early 2000's R&B, pop and nu metal. It's nostalgia, okay? Media - reality fashion shows that involve competitions, e.g. Project Runway, or ANTM. And cooking shows, but I don't feel guilty about those lol.

Tattoos? No, nothing's ever struck me as significant enough for me to want to have it on my skin permanently. If I had a weird scar I would cover it up with a tattoo, though.

Favorite color? Purple, especially lilac and lavender shades.

Favorite types of music? It fluctuates, but I've mostly been on an electronic / industrial binge lately.

Do you like puzzles? Puzzles often make me feel like an idiot, but if there is no timer, pressure or audience - sure. ...Or like, jigsaw puzzles? I fkn LOVE jigsaw puzzles.

Any phobias? Nope.

Favorite childhood sport? Bold of you to assume I participated in ANY sport as a child, much less had a favourite. Uh. Ice skating and rollerblading was fun, I guess. I sometimes contemplate getting rollerblades again, but then I also rather enjoy all my bones being intact. 🤔

Do you talk to yourself? All the time, although mostly in the form of muttered swears and various exclamations.

What movies do you adore? I'm going to pass on this one, or it might turn into a very long rant. To summarise: I like weird movies, horror and comedy horror. Some examples: Mulholland Drive, Eraserhead, Army of Darkness.

Coffee or tea? Both. Start the day with coffee, then drink tea for the remainder. I'm very particular with my coffee though - every morning begins with a little ritual of grinding whole beans and preparing it with a french press.

First thing you wanted to be growing up? One of my earliest memories is me wondering what I wanted to be when I grew up, and my little 4 or 5 year old brain thinking that my only options were teacher, doctor and cashier, for some reason, and being sad because I didn't want to be any of those. I don't think I ever wanted to be anything, as a child - I just wanted to read my books and play with my toys. In fact, I still feel that way. 😠

No pressure tagging (and sorry for any repeats): @spacebarbarianweird @thechaoticdruid @snowfolly @brabblesblog @confused-butter-toast @tragedybunny

[nautiscarader]

What the hecking heck happened with me - THE UNNECESSARY (and kinda boring) SEQUEL

So you might have noticed I have been absent for the past 2.5 weeks. So, where have I been? What has happened to me?

Well, you see, I got this magical music box, and when I opened it, I was transported into a different world full of talking frogs, toads and-

Wait, I've done this bit already.

....

Yeah, got into hospital. AGAIN.

Same warning as before applies, regarding medical stuff. Especially if you are eating.

Chapter 13: Wednesday Night's fever

So around three weeks ago I found myself really sapped of strength. Well, as you might recall, I basically had a fall and got wounds on my hip. Or to put it in another words:

Well, something from those wounds got infected or something and started affecting my whole body. The effect? Pretty much daily ~38C (~100F) fevers that drained me of energy.

No, buddy, the solution is paracetamol.

That was helping me daily when I was in hospital while getting some long-term antibiotics.

So, yeah, not to blow the trumpet, it was pretty much that: drips, pills, drips, pills, gastroscopy, drips, pi-wait, what did I say AND WHAT IS THIS THING-

Chapter 14: Gastroscopy

So I had to have gastroscopy done, which, in case you don't know is basically a tube with camera being inserted into your esophagus and-

Yeah, not pleasant. But the whole thing lasted only about 10 minutes, and the worst part was the first 30 seconds. So, no biggie. Now, let's talk about....

Chapter 15: Neighbours

Because they were really an odd collection.

First one was just an old dude who hated when I asked to open windows (and of course just as I was admitted spring temps have arrived)

Second one was a detective! In fact he has just solved a murder mystery that happened in the adjacent room! And the murderer was his roommate!

... yeah, he was pretty out of touch with reality, they took him after a day.

And then comes our star: Typical Janush, or Ordinary Janusz, as the Polish meme goes (don't worry if you don't get it)

This absolute unit of Polishness with huuuuge beer belly, bald spot and moustache has brought with him in his bag of holding:

coffee and sugar (nothing spectacular tbh)

TWO different chocolate waffers packs,

two strawberry chocolate bars,

Toffee sweets,

coffee sweets,

TWO different types of sausages,

home-made chicken wings,

and a jar of pickled mushrooms (fereality-indy DNI)

What else did he have in it? I don't know, and frankly, I am scared of the possibilities. This guy could give Mary Poppins a run when it comes to that bag.

He cursed like a sailor when he watched the news - and he watched all the news, he was funding the TV, so he might as well get what he's paid for.

He was also... really kind. He helped me with everything I couldn't do, sometimes faster than the nurses. Really awesome dude.

And the last one who was admitted JUST as I was leaving, was a 96-year old grandpa with some gastric problems. What problems? I don't know, but imagine a cat coughing up a furball... at a volume of a small steam locomotive. At 2 a.m. Every half an hour.

i only had to deal with him for a day.

He also brought... a flask with him.

The one they usually sell spirytus in. Now, it did NOT contain alcohol, just lemon-flavoured water.... but you had to see the nurse's reaction when he was seen casually drinking from it :) He was politely told to use other vessels.

And as a bonus, there was a guy in adjacent room who sometimes visited us and wore a curious t-shirt.... you know the "how do you do fellow kids" meme, right?

and how they just wrote "music band" in order to avoid problems with AC/DC copyright?

Well, his T-shirt had a generic basketball and words "Basketball Team est. 1992". And that's it. No other allusions to, say, Chicago Bulls, or any other team. Just that.

We have reached singularity, people.

Chapter 16: In conclusion, it was mostly boring

Yeah, I have to admit, this stay wasn't that eventful, which I guess I should count as blessing. What else to add... Oh, all the nurses were h*cking cute!

One even recognised me from my first visit!

So, yeah, now I've done the unpacking, and oh boy, you always collect lots of stuff you then forget about.

Like-

Wait, the heck is that?

It... it looks like I have written a 4k Glitch Techs G-rated fic... on my phone! Which has non-existent keyboard! Wait, that can't be right...

It's mostly done, but not finished... Still, it's a shame if it got wasted, right?

[vintagelacerosette]

Tag game Tuesday/picrew catch up!

Oh how I've missed doing these! Thank you so much to these sweetpeas who tagged me to do these tag games/picrew. Lyle @milkovetti Michelle @michellemisfit Bri @y0itsbri Evie @energievie Julia @juliakayyy Georgia @iansw0rld Kat @mybrainismelted Nosho @creepkinginc Cross @crossmydna Willow @ian-galagher Lyds @ardent-fox Vey @look-i-love-u Molly @deathclassic Jay @surviving-maybe 💕

💟Name: Myn/Shermyn

#️⃣Age: 27

🗺️Location: Sydney

🧥Do you own a robe? Describe it. Yeah a pink silky with lace trim one my older sister gifted me as my maid of honour gift 🥰

☕️Do you have a favorite mug? Describe it. Why yes! It's one of my prized possessions! My Gallacrafts mug I made art with the darling & talented Ling @lingy910y

🧣Do you have a favorite blanket? Describe it. You know I don't think I do & that's tragic 😔

🍵Coffee or Tea? Tea

↳🔥🧊Hot or Cold? Cold it's been so damn humid & dry in Sydney rn 😓

🧦Fuzzy socks or Wool socks? Wool

🧤Gloves or Mittens? Gloves but the fingerless kind so I can scroll/read fics on my phone lol

🔥Fireplace or Campfire? Fireplace

🌞🌜Sun or Moon? Both baby! They work in tandem to give us life ☀️🌙

🍬Chocolate candy or Sugar candy? Sugar 🍭

🥐Sweet Pastry or Savory Pastry? Sweet

🎃Peppermint or Pumpkin Spice? Peppermint. I haven't had pumpkin spice before

🛏️Go to bed early or Wake up early? Wake up early but i don't sleep early to make the happen 🥲

🥣Cold cereal in milk or Hot oatmeal? Cold cereal in milk I especially love the sweet ones. American cereal certainly hit the spot with their cinnamon toast crunch or lucky charms 🤤

🍞Potatoes or Bread? 🥔

And Finally…

🚬 Gallagher or Milkovich? It'll have to be MIlkovich even tho objectively the are more terrible ones than good. But to be fair the great stole my fucking heart 💖

Picrew

Which character from any media would you like to have as a father? 

I think Johnny Rose from Schitt's Creek would be a funny dad plus loaded 🤣

If money, laws, time, and effort were no object, what animal would you want to have?

I'd love an otter omfg they're so damn cute 😭

What is your Chinese takeout order? 

Sweet & sour pork & spinch noodle with wild mushrooms.

What's your favorite emoji?

🥹 I'm particularly fond of this one bc it's the marvelling of beauty for me

Would you rather have a library, greenhouse, or home theater in your house?

I think greenhouse. I think would be so soothing & I feel like I need more plants in my life hahaha

What childhood tv show do you think of the most fondly?

Cardcaptor Sakura 🌸

What was your tumblr like when you first joined?

I joined 2012 it was so aesthetic & I wished be one of those vintage aesthetic blogs hence my tumblr name lmao. I kinda got confused & scared how to use it so i stopped for 2 years. So i missed out all the fun drama i guess lol. Then I started using it as like a scrapbook of things I liked hahah

What clothing style do you love but don't feel compelled to replicate yourself?

50s but I feel that would be such an effort to pull off

If you were plopped into a fictional world, which one would you know the layout of the best?

Pokemon but like in the switch games. I've been playing too much instead of sleeping lmao

What is your favourite piece of art? 

Idk if I have a favourite but one that impacted me in high school was a piece called 'Atomic: full of love, full of wonder' by Nike Savvas. Funny thing is that I got to see it in person may 2 or 3 years after seeing it in a high school text book & having to do essays on it. It was by complete accident & I had no idea see was displaying her work in our national art gallery. It was magic to see a piece irl after studying it 🥰

Do you have a water bottle? what does it look like?

My bestie jusr got me this steel pink hello kitty tumblr that was a collab with a bubble tea shop! I love it I take it to work 💖

What fanfic trope is a quiet fave?

I think time travel with younger selves meeting their older selve & seeing how they fot their happy ending 🥰

Do you carry a daily bag? what does it look like? what's the weirdest thing in it?

Yeah a carry bag for work. It's this tote bag another bestie got me for my last birthday. It's really cute. It's pink & mint green with a cluster of cute things like teddy bear.

If you had to ship Mickey with another Gallagher, who would it be?

Respectfully no ❤️

What is a fanfic trope you didn't expect to like and then very much did?

I'd say mafia au especially bc of the amazing fic by Kay/Shamelessquestions, The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Ian Gallagher.

Do you think s11 Mickey can still carry s11 Ian?

He sure could! He's our swol lil man

Look at them guns!!

Who got custody of the killing bat when they sold the house?

I kind have this tie between Fiona getting it or it being passed to Liam & Franny to keep the legacy going

Not tagging any bc I'm late but if you see this & you want to go ahead starlight 🩷