#especially in gilgamesh

[nereidof40k]

Lenore now has a backstory written up.

TW: Nostramo fucked-up-ness.

One sunless winter day in 884.M30 as the Imperium of Man counts time, on the dreary world of Nostramo, two children were born. As happens all over the galaxy.

(Later estimated to be 980.884.M30 by Imperial archivists)

These two would turn out to be linked. The first, in City’s Edge, Hive Quintus, was the later to be infamous Jago Sevatarion. Unaware of his checkered future. But what he had was a mother.

The second, in a towering gothic castle outside of Nostramo’s teeming hive cities was a blonde girl saddled with the name of Anastasia Eleanor Victoria Erzsebet Voronina. (Later preferred the shortened form Lenore.)

Unusually decanted from a Drukhari cloning vat by one of the feared Haemonculi. According to the wishes of one Count Vladimir Alexander Gabriel Voronin, the lord of the castle. Who had decided on this course of action due to the sheer impossibility of finding a wife lacking in the curiosity to go poking around his secret rooms.

A man cannot be spending his life on lavish weddings when there is work to do, as he would remark.

His daughter was mostly left to be raised by servants until she was old enough to be of use in his schemes.

What neither the Drukhari nor the Count knew was that the wrong infant had been delivered.

Having more genetic material than needed, the Drukhari had made several infants. While this girl certainly had the Count’s genes, the other parent was the Primarch Sanguinius. Moreover, the Haemonculus had infused this child with a shard of the Aeldari God of War, wrath, destruction and murder, Kaela Mensha Khaine. Khaine the Bloody Handed. Making her 1/3 Nostraman, 1/3 Primarch and 1/3 Aeldari.

Illicit substances may have been involved in the confusion, as well as an inability to tell mon’keigh infants apart.

Lenore, being who she was, frequently slipped away from home to explore. On one such trip, she met the young boy Jago Sevatarion. Who found her takedown of a would be mugger to be intensely interesting.

Nostraman men seem to be genetically incapable of resisting women capable of killing or grievously wounding them.

One trip because many, the pair becoming inseparable.

On one such occasion, Jago presented his friend with a knife, the handle fashioned from the arm bone of a would be trafficker, known to deal in slaves. (Count Voronin was not best pleased to lose one of his associates)

This was the last time the two met, as the Count had become aware that his dear daughter had been straying outside his castle. Fortunately for Sevatarion, and the Night Lords’ future common sense, he had not found his daughter’s suitor. Nor that she had one.

Upon Lenore’s return, she was thrown in the dungeon, until the Drukhari could be contacted to force compliance. (Maybe he should have asked the Imperium, as the Astartes indoctrination would have done the job. He was out for blood, though.)

As a result of the Haemonculus’ tender mercies, the implanted shard of Khaine triggered, fully fusing with Lenore to become something more. Going on a godly killing rampage through the burning castle, Lenore came across her uncle, the Count’s twin brother, Adrian Mihail Wilhelm Voronin. He had long desired to wed his brother’s daughter, trying to force her compliance at sword point. Leading to Lenore getting her throat slit. Not that it would kill her at this point. But it was clear that she needed to train to master her abilities.

Purposely falling from the castle buttresses into the moat infested with carnivorous fish, Lenore let her uncle believe she had passed. Fleeing Nostramo, she found it difficult to hide, due to the changes wrought by the merger with a part of an Aeldari god. Additionally the Drukhari were pursuing her as well, finally having realized where their misplaced weapon had been.

The pointed ears were somewhat possible to hide, but the giant black feathered wings from Sanguinius were a different matter. Requiring Lenore to cut her own wings off on a regular basis to avoid detection. Especially after she joined the Great Crusade as an Archivist. The wings always grow back within a short time. But she could not afford to stand out. Not without allies.

[artblock-tm]

Here are some more fate series doodles! I have a lot of fun posting these actually.

And here’s a mini lyric comic :)

[luxaofhesperides]

You tell me where you've been. I tell you where I've been. And then we can figure out where we are now.

[gilgil-machine]

I wish some people never had access to internet at all...

TW assault, TW r*pe

[veiledfox]

} There really is something to good music making things memorable

[p3answer]

i need to finish fate/extra so bad i was enjoying it so so so much and i just stopped for some reason. but well i am eating so many vns right now i need to put it on the backburner

[battle-subway-ghost]

what the fuck is up is up with those plushes people keep sending you?

I wish I knew too, anon. I really do.

[redladydeath]

shout out to my twelfth grade honors english/humanities teacher for having us read the epic of gilgamesh and other ancient texts: we didn’t really get it at the time, but that shit Cultured us

[llycaons]

I'm willing to admit that I may not be in the most forgiving reading mindspace for YA fantasy right now considering what I've just finished

[gilgil-machine]

Such a mood lol

Disappointed Hakunon, In the first gameplay CCC Liz kicking his butt and getting one shot lol...

[soaps-mohawk]

I just saw someone talk about Simon Riley being a rapist and the only way they tried to confirm it is by saying that he is a war criminal and all soldiers are misogynistic and sexist and they also talked about how he dreamt of hurting women in the comics when that's quite literally a normal reaction by being raped by both men and women (what I mean is that abused people sometimes dream of becoming someone they're not and don't want to be) but they conveniently forgot to mention how that "dream" was a nightmare. (Just wanted to rant about this and see your opinion)

The sigh I let out when I saw this ask this morning.

I'm so sick and tired of seeing this discourse. Not just in this fandom but in every fandom. Maybe it's just because I'm old and my frontal lobe is fully developed, or maybe it's because I was in fandom back in the days where there were no tags. You were lucky if you got a warning at the beginning of a fic. Most fics you walked in blind and if you didn't like something? You hit the back button and found something else.

This sudden mainstreaming of fandom has ruined these spaces. People come in, refuse to "learn the rules" that most of us learned by just existing in these spaces and watching others interact. There were no written rules back then. We learned by observing and occasionally being guided on fandom etiquette by those more experienced than us. Now it's just like people come in expecting fandom to be like every other space on the internet and then get defensive and angry when they realize it's not. Fandom is cringy. It's nerdy. It's happy and sunshine and it's dark and ugly like every media out there. Us creators and those of us more experienced in fandom have been screaming how to exist in fandom spaces from the rooftops but no one is listening and then everyone wonders why creators are leaving these spaces. Why fandoms keep getting abandoned.

All of that aside, this discourse about FICTIONAL characters pisses me off. Simon Riley is a FICTIONAL character. He has no morality, there is no right or wrong because he's FICTIONAL. You can make him do whatever you want to do because he's NOT REAL. You can give him wings and have him fly and guess what?? Cool, that can happen because he's NOT REAL. You want to make him a rapist? Cool, you can do that because he's FICTIONAL. You can make him whatever you want to make him because he's a character. He's not a living, breathing human being. There are no consequences of his actions because he's FICTIONAL!!!

Don't even get me started on this sudden discourse about dark fics and dead dove that's appeared recently. Dark media has existed for literal centuries. The Epic of Gilgamesh from 1800 BCE. The Odyssey. Mostellaria by Plautus. The Castle of Otranto published in the 1700s. Frankenstein. Dracula. The works of Edgar Allan Poe. Lolita. Hell, look at the Bible. The Bible, especially the old testament, is fucked up. Even in the watered down, bastardized King James version, the things the old testament "God" supposedly did, when you sit and actually think about them outside the lens of religious brainrot, are super fucked up.

People have been creating dark media for a long time. Horror has existed for a long time because it plays to our worst fears. It gives us a safe way to express those fears and to experience them without having to experience them first hand. You wouldn't bitch at a horror movie director for including things like rape and gore and murder in their movies?? So why is writing different? You think every horror movie director agrees with the things they portray on screen? You think every horror movie director would go out and murder someone just because they made a movie about it? No, because we're allowed to portray things in all forms of media, we're allowed to write things without morally agreeing with them. Guess what, most people that write rape or assault or violence, aren't going out and doing those things in real life. They don't support those things in real life. In fact, people that write dark fanfics are some of the loudest protesters against those things.

If you want to make Simon Riley a real person, guess what? He's not going to be even morally grey. Most people in the military are not good people. They're not. The people that are good people in the military, or were in the military, are the ones saying that the loudest. People that got tricked into joining, people that got promised things, people that did it because they had no other choice and then realized what it was really like after getting in? Those are the people to listen to. Not Call of Duty, not the people trying to convince you to join because they're glorified sales people and have a quota to fill. Look up videos of what happened in Iraq and Afghanistan at the hands of American and British soldiers. You would not like Simon Riley if he were a real person.

But he's not real. He's FICTIONAL. Even as a fictional character, he's not a good person. So many Call of Duty fans put on the blinders and ignore the fact that these men are out here committing awful acts of violence and killing people because they're "the good guys." People love to forget that Price literally kidnapped a woman and a child and had them held at gunpoint to get information out of someone. Not only that, he was okay with it. If he were a real person that did that, you would not be questioning if he were a good person or not. You can tell the people that have never played the games or watched playthroughs, who only know these characters through the lenses of fanfics and artwork and headcanons.

Call of Duty is military propaganda. They paint these men as heroes, make it easy to put the blinders up and ignore the things that are happening, the things they're doing so that they can convince young men that they want to do that and they should join the military so they can go out and do that too. That's Call of Duty's audience. That's who they're creating these games for. These young, impressionable boys who get excited by the violence and the action who will go on to fill quota numbers for recruiters. Call of Duty was not made for us, the people writing fanfiction and creating art for it. This side of the Call of Duty fandom will be the first to tell you all of this.

This side of the fandom creates fanworks which would turn Activision's eyes red. We babygirlify their military propaganda because it actively goes against what Activision is trying to do. It goes against what Call of Duty is at its core. Sure, some people water it down a lot, and others keep it more realistic to what these men would be like in real life, because it's FICTION. You can portray these characters however you want because that's what fiction is for.

And guess what, anon? Rape kinks exist. Consensual non-consent exists. It's well known. And guess what? Victims of sexual assault and rape can develop those kinks as a coping mechanism. Here's a study from the NIH website, and if that's too complex for you, here's a VICE news article that uses that study. People can write rape and rape kinks and CNC and noncon and not support it in real life. People can write those things to bring awareness to the fact that they happen to people in real life, or because people in real life have those kinks. People write those things to help victims, to support them. It's cathartic. Dark media most often is created for catharsis. It gives people an outlet, and it allows people to experience those things in a safe, controlled environment for whatever reason.

And that's the thing, anon. People don't have to give anyone a reason for why the consume that kind of media. Creators don't owe anyone an explanation as to why they create it. It's none of your business, and if you're not comfortable with it, then don't consume it. You can turn off the TV if a horror movie is too much for you. People walk out of theaters all the time because a movie is not what they were expecting, be it because it was bad or because it was too graphic or violent or disgusting. You start reading a book and you don't like it for whatever reason? You put the book down and pick up another. Why do people have such a problem with not reading fanfics they don't like? Why do people have such a hard time just blocking creators that make things they don't want to see. Most dark fic and dead dove creators put ample warnings on their blog and their posts. That's why those tags exist. You don't like it and you don't want to see it? Then block and move on and let others enjoy what they want to enjoy.

You pearl clutchers are ruining fandom and soon there won't be anything for you to enjoy. If you can't handle fandom, then don't be in it. There is no algorithm here. You're going to see things you don't want to see and it's very easy to just block and filter tags. There was a time on Tumblr where you couldn't filter tags. I remember those days. You had to download the X-kit extension to block things, and that only worked on desktop. The fact Tumblr gave us the option to filter tags on the site and on the app was a big deal when it was rolled out. I remember so many people that didn't want to use the app when it first came out because you couldn't block potentially triggering tags.

It's not a creator's problem if you were triggered by their media. Life doesn't come with trigger warnings and it's a blessing that it's become so normalized to include warnings at the beginnings of fics. There's websites that exist for other forms of media that will give trigger warnings. If you can look up trigger warnings for a movie and decide not to watch it, you can look at the trigger warnings for fics and decide not to interact with it. You're not out here emailing the directors and producers of movies that include triggers you don't like, telling them they're awful people for including those things in their movie and they shouldn't. Yet you have no problem coming into the comments and inboxes creators who do this FOR FREE because we wrote one dark fic. Because we wrote something that's triggering to you.

And yes, some abuse victims go on to be abusers, some people continue that cycle because they don't have the help and support to break it. It's a sad thing that happens, but it happens. It happens in the fictional world and it happens in real life. People can make that happen to fictional characters for whatever reasons they want.

I've written dark fics. I've written several. I consume "disturbing" media for fun. I've read books and watched movies that would send these pearl clutchers to the hospital. Hell, I've probably written things (some published, some that will never see the light of day) that would turn these pearl clutchers inside out. Guess what? That's okay because it's FICTION. It's cathartic. I don't have to give my reasons why because it's no one's business except those I decide to tell because I trust them and I know they'll support me. I don't support those things in real life. Just because I write for Call of Duty doesn't mean I support the things the game portrays. If you consume Call of Duty media be it the games or fanfiction, does that mean you support what the game supports? What the creators of the games support? What militaries around the world support?

Think about that next time.

I’ve made my stance very clear here before, but I’ll do it again. In real life, I am anti military, anti war, anti gun violence, anti genocide, anti fascism, anti terf, anti homophobia, anti conservative, anti rape, anti domestic violence, anti colonialism and pro choice.

Just because I may create or consume media with those things in it, does not mean I support them. It's high time some of these pearl clutchers learn that.

The next time you want to come into a creator's inbox or comments and spew hatred towards them because of the things they write, why don't you do something useful with your time instead.

This will be my only discussion on this topic. I will not be answering any more asks like this. I will delete and block anyone who tries to come "well actually"-ing into my inbox. If you don't agree with this stance, then get off my blog and block me.

[multiversemittens]

Stuff I have to gush about in the new audiolog:

It's just the perfect representation of 2006 fanfiction/cringe/emo culture. Especially the drawings.

The way the fam is just so supportive of Boy and he doesn't feel he needs to hide his hobbies from them.

Big D would eat a boulder for Boy.

Boy is a better writer than most Hollywood professionals (so are the HTP writers).

Boy's mother reveal?!

Loved the tangent about kappas. I have a sea otter named Kappa in one of my book series.

Kitten and Marckus continue being the best couple (casually making fun of each other is how British people show our love).

D is a fellow Weird Crystal Person. Apparently that isn't part of WoD lore, D is just Like That.

I love how Boy's fountain of knowledge works. He knows about Gilgamesh, Baudhayana, and Jackson Pollock but he doesn't know what commas are.

The very fact that Ogre Poppenang went so deep into Crazy Frog lore.

The fact there are British vampire punks in Japan.

Beyblade reference!! I spent most of the 2000s writing equally cringe Beyblade fanfiction (actually that's how I met the guy I'm now married to).

The fact Marckus is so moved by the character based upon him and how much Boy looks up to him.

Wasn't expecting to hear Door talking about art. I want to take Door to a modern art museum just to hear him complain.

Actually I think this story might be a movie from MST3K.

Boy meets the Almighty in his dreams.

Poor Boy is clearly using his fanfiction as a distraction from his trauma.

The conversation between D and Door at the end. Whilst they do force Boy into vampire hunting and give him alcohol, they clearly care for his well-being and it's heart breaking.

[shiroisotto64]

Gilgamesh Headcanons

He’s not fooling anyone. When he takes a liking to you it’s so obvious. Slowly VERY SLOWLY you go from just a mongrel..to his mongrel? Like huh…?

He’s very possessive of you as well. All treasures belong to him, now that counts you as well. He calls you out on it to. Like why are you getting so close and touchy with emiya, and lord forbid it be cu. Their pests now pay attention to him.

he desires all your attention. If you start to pay to much attention to another servant or he just feels neglected in general he’ll make it known. Gilgamesh will corner you and fuss at you until you explain why you’ve been distant all of a sudden. He’s your king! How dare you not pay attention to him.

Loves showing off and spoiling you. You want it? He’s already got it for you. Despite how he may act he is a decent listener when he wants to be. And since he isn’t the best with words he’s adept to just get you things. Hopefully that gets his feelings across and if not? He’ll flick you.

Just like the old man he is he likes to go on and on about his journeys and the things he used to do in Uruk. Gil could go on for hours and hours about his glory days. And he’s even more shocked if you actually try to listen and ask questions. Not only does this boost his already large ego, but expect him to be a bit more affectionate.

Whenever you’re having bad days and issues he does try to help you. But like I said he’s not the best with words. He’ll say something harsh like “this is stupid!” And “get over it.” Don’t forget “suck it up.” He holds you in high regards so act like it.

But once he sees the negative affect his words had he’ll quiet down and hold you close to him. Hopefully that’ll get his feelings across. And if not he’ll ask someone else for…assistance.

Loves fighting but especially when your there. I told you he likes to show off! And show off he will, this MIGHT be one of the only times he takes a fight seriously…lucky you! Especially if things are starting to get serious.

Gilgamesh would never allow anything happen to you, remember he’s the Gilgamesh. He’ll have something in his gate to be of use to you. Medicine, shields, clothes, etc. he’d happily grab it for you.

Gil likes to talk to you actually. Your opinions on things amuse him. The way you think and tick is so different from him and he wants to understand your mindset better. Playful banter or a serious discussion he doesn’t mind.

And like someone else said, I could see him dragging you along to play games with him like chest, and other mentally stimulating games.

[smolgreybunny]

I just found the Iliad and the Odyssey in graphic novel form this weekend, and I'm so excited to read them! They're by Gareth Hinds, and the insides are as gorgeous as the covers! I'd come to terms with the fact that I'll probably never treat the original texts lol, old texts don't keep my attention well. But I also know they're referenced in modern literature super often, and I wish I understood the references better. So I saw these and realized it's a great way for me to actually read them!

Would people be interested in a reading list of classic ancient world literature for beginners I'm kinda in the mood to infodump

[gilgil-machine]

.

[cultkinkcoven]

hey there, would you mind telling me a bit about Lilith and your practice with her? I’ve been trying to do some research on her modern worship, offerings, and signs, but it can be really difficult to find anything that’s serious when there are so many references to her in pop culture :/

Okay so Lilith is extremely, and I mean extremely complicated.

Contrary to popular belief, “Lucifer” isn’t actually a name, but a title. The name Lucifer means “light bringer” in reference to Venus as she appears in the morning, but any “light bringer” can be considered a Lucifer. Prometheus for example, the man who stole fire from the Gods to give light to humanity, is a Lucifer. And so, there are actually many different entities that have taken the role of a Lucifer throughout history and in various different retellings. Eosphorus is the name of the deity that was revered by the Greeks as Venus, but Lucifer is a title that many different figures have taken on depending on the context.

Why do I bring up Lucifer? Because he and Lilith are very similar in that regard. Our earliest mentions of Lilith throughout history paint her not as an individual but as a species of night demon that frequently takes the form of an owl, she was known to bring crib death and miscarriage.

In the myth, Inanna and the Huluppu tree, a huluppu tree (a type of willow) is planted by the banks of the Euphrates River. The tree is tended and nurtured by the goddess Inanna, who plans to use its wood to craft a throne and a bed for herself. However, as the tree grows, it becomes infested with three troublesome creatures:

A serpent that makes its home at the roots of the tree. (What troublesome serpents have been portrayed in another mythology having to do with magical trees? HMM!)

The Anzu bird (sometimes described as a mythical lion-headed eagle) that builds its nest in the branches.

The Lilitu (a female demon or spirit) that makes her lair in the trunk.

Inanna, distressed by these creatures occupying her tree, calls for help from her brother, the sun god Utu (or Shamash). When Utu does not assist her, she turns to the hero Gilgamesh. Gilgamesh comes to her aid and, with his great strength, drives away the serpent, the Anzu bird, and the Lilitu. He uproots the huluppu tree and uses its wood to craft a throne and a bed for Inanna, fulfilling her original intention. Consider that it is a human, not the God of the sun, who helps Inanna with this problem. Interesting.

The inclusion of these three very specific creatures occupying this important tree tended to by the Goddess of love, to her dismay, are very important. Especially when he consider how Inanna’s visual depictions have been syncretized with Lilith. The idea of a serpent (perhaps a Lucifer) , an Anzu bird (described quite similarly to some depictions of abrahamic angels, specifically those like the cherubim) and a Lilith being “driven away” from this mythical tree are notable, especially because these are all symbols associated with Inanna herself.

Inanna, one of the most complex deities in Mesopotamian mythology, embodies aspects of fertility, love, war, and the underworld. Inanna's association with snakes can be seen in her connection to the underworld and her transformative journeys. In her descent into the underworld, Inanna removes one magical garment as she continues into the deathly realm. Just as the snake sheds its skin, Inanna sheds her power and identity as she descends, only to be reborn and restored.

Inanna is frequently depicted with wings, highlighting her divine nature and authority. The Anzu bird in the Huluppu Tree myth, while initially a source of trouble, also connects to the theme of overcoming chaos, which aligns with Inanna's role as a powerful deity who brings order.

Lilith, often depicted as a demoness, represents untamed feminine power, independence, and sometimes chaos. In later Jewish mythology, she is considered a night demon, but her roots trace back to earlier Mesopotamian beliefs. Her inclusion in Jewish mythology is summed up in the verse Isaiah 34:14: "Wildcats shall meet with hyenas, goat-demons shall call to each other; there too Lilith shall repose, and find a place to rest." (Hm… I wonder WHERE she will find a place to rest? Perhaps in a… magical tree?)

In Jewish mysticism, the feminine side of the tree of life is what creates the potential for evil. Even though it is the lightest, brightest, goodest form of feminine energy, for some reason, every time, disobedience pops up no matter what we do. It is an aspect of the feminine itself.

In the Huluppu Tree myth, Lilith (or a Lilitu) makes her home in the tree that Inanna nurtures. This connection reflects Inanna's association with both nurturing and taming wild, untamed aspects of the feminine. Lilith's presence in the tree also highlights the tension between order and chaos, which Inanna must navigate and control.

So what does this all mean?

Each creature in the tree draw direct parallels to the Goddess of Love herself. These can be interpreted as perversions of her divine nature, that she herself cannot be-rid of on her own. Inanna the Goddess of WAR couldn’t get an owl, a big bird, and a snake out of a tree??? Why? Likewise, why did the divinities refuse to help her? Why did she have to seek out a human specifically, to get those unwelcome guests out of her tree? And if it is so that Inanna just doesn’t really like owls and snakes, why is she represented with them (and generally just hanging out with them) so often?

Lilith, the serpent, and the Anzu bird reflect aspects of the divine mother that she herself cannot even tame. Lilith as the night owl also reflects an aspect of knowledge and wisdom, as owls can see in the dark and hunt strategically. Even though she is portrayed as an enemy of Inanna, Inanna never once can or even tries to harm her. Inanna being the Goddess of fertility, and Lilith being the demon that causes miscarriage, show that they are natural opposites, yet still derived from the same divine source, and never combative towards each other.

Similarly, Lucifer’s first ever depiction was as his role as Venus, the same astrological planet as what is associated with Inanna. In Christianity, Lucifer played the role of the serpent who convinced Eve, another archetype of divine femininity, to eat the forbidden fruit of knowledge. Interestingly enough, Lilith is never actually portrayed eating the fruit. Does she posses a divine knowledge that is inherent to her qualities as a night owl, to the point where she didn’t need to eat the fruit to have the wisdom to disobey Adam? Does she possess a knowledge that is inherent to the divine feminine force from which she was created? Is this because she was created from the divine forces of femininity itself and not derived from man, as Eve was? If this is the case, that even though Eve ate the apple, she did not become a Lilith, that stands to imply that there is an inherent quality about being derived from a human man, that repels or deflects that inherent feminine rebellious quality. Instead, being replaced with the the ability to submit.

Knowledge applied with the associations of night and mystery, create a feminine energy that cannot submit, and this is likely Inanna’s fault herself, as she very notably has a big issue with respecting any authority higher than herself, even death herself (as her big sister)

From a symbolic standpoint this tells us a couple things about Venusian energy in general.

1.) Regardless of how hard it tries to behave, it is inherently chaotic

2.) It has many faces, some of which do not jive with eachother, but even so, they continue to coexist, even if not in the same places

3.) It is a creator and a destroyer.

4.) It has a very rough time with the concept of submission.

Okay YAP fest, what’s the point?

Lilith is a great example of how the dark feminine exists within the light feminine as an inevitability. Lilith is not so much associated with war, the strategic enactment of violence., but rather the inherent unpredictability of femininity. Women both create life and snuff it, women can decide to procreate or to have an abortion. Lamashtu and Lilith respectively were invoked for abortive purposes.

And of course, Lilith’s adoption by feminist spaces as a self actualized protector of individuality and feminine rage also invoke heavy associations with Inanna as the Goddess of war. So in my interpretation, Lilith is that part of Inanna that went a little unchecked for a little too long. That combined with the themes of Lucifer’s liberation, paint a very interesting narrative about how femininity as a divine force shows up in obscure ways, perhaps even negative ways, whilst still being just as divine and inherent. To recognize Lilith as the antithesis of all of these things, is to see her as the unwavering aspect of femininity that cannot be tamed, even by femininity herself. The snake, the reborn, will always cause chaos at the root of the feminine energy. The Anzu bird, the angels, are susceptible to that same corruption. And the Lilith herself will always find a home within that feminine energy, unless of course, she is snuffed by the will of a man who doesn’t respect her. Still, she does not die, just searches for another place to rest.

Wow this was really long. SO. Lilith is the entity that embodies our biggest fears about femininity and the inherent knowledge that women posses. Women know how to create life, and women have the ultimate authority in ending it. To honour Lilith as a Goddess rather than a troublesome demon, is to recognize that even the parts of femininity that femininity herself can’t control are divine in nature. The knowledge that she possesses makes women incapable of submission. And the Gods themselves are aware of this, and do not interfere with her, because she is a Goddess herself carrying out an important function, even if it doesn’t adhere to what they might like. Basically, rebellion is an inevitability to any feminine creature that possesses knowledge. It is unavoidable.

It’s incredibly difficult to find anything about the worship of Lilith because for a long time she wasn’t given her flowers as a divinity. Even Inanna herself tried to get her to fuck off. You can honour her quite similarly to the way Artemis and Athena were worshipped, alongside Inanna or Aphrodite of course. As the dark, mysterious, yet inexplicably wise mother of demons, she is the creative force behind destruction. She’s the aspect that exists in all of these Goddesses, that most of us would rather not think about. She is a woman who cannot be held in captivity, if you tell her to procreate, she will cause miscarriage. If you tell her to obey, she will become even more rebellious. The more you repress her, the stronger she becomes. No matter how oppressed women become, no matter how subservient, so long as they have any connection to the divine feminine, they will have a Lilith inside of them.

Lilith’s representation of a succubus expands upon her associations as a woman who does what women do, (men thought women were sex objects for a long time) but not for the sake of cooperation, but for her own means. Lilith is very much a woman, capable of doing what all women and feminine goddesses can do. She simply chooses not to, similarly to how Artemis simply chooses not to procreate. The element of choice, (hello again, Lucifer) always being an option to women is, from a patriarchal standpoint, really scary for men.

So how do you worship her? Worshipping Lilith, like Lucifer, is technically paradoxical. Lucifer wants us to worship ourselves. If he accepts worship it’s because you’re using him as a metaphor for yourself. Lucifer believes in no man submitting to no God, so he won’t take on the role of the usual “authority”. Lilith is quite similar, to worship her is to worship the wise and rebellious spirit that exists in the feminine- yourself. Self honouring acts honour Lilith, just as they honour Lucifer. It’s important to remember that Lilith isn’t just rebellion for the sake of arguing, she isn’t a contrarian. She is self actualization that just happens to not go with the status quo. She does what she wants, if that pisses you off: cope. She’s not inherently against men or procreation, or even women who are submissive. She is the constant exception. The random variable that always pops up whenever we deal with feminine deities. So for me, I honour her as an extension. of every existing goddess. Within Inanna, there is a Lilith, as there is within Aphrodite, Hera, Artemis, Athena, etc etc.

Wow this was long as fuck but I hope it provided a little bit of insight as to why Lilith is so fucking confusing. Regardless of which contexts you feel are the most true, Lilith, like all deities will continue to evolve with time. Just as the narrative around Medusa has gradually changed into her being a victim instead of a monster, Lilith has shifted from being a demon that just kills babies to the ultimate personification of feminine independence. All of these interpretations are correct in the right context, you just have to figure out which context best applies to you.

OKAY if you actually read this far here’s a flower 🌹