#especially frank calling himself a lesbian

[songsforboys]

i desperately need all the teens on tiktok who post about petekey/frerard/whatever gabe saporta did to know that weirdboys are just like that. i spent a lot of my early 20s hanging out with theater fratboys and stoners. they’re unnecessarily homoerotic most of the time and pretty consistently doing odd things on impulse.

[iwannakisskissyoureyesagain]

things that definitely happened in the percy jackson series’ that rick left out/didn’t expand on (basically a collection of headcanons)

- leo teased percy and annabeth about the stables scene for weeks until it got old

- leo trying to make a move on EVERYONE he interacted with, especially the aphrodite cabin

- (leo was a hey mamas lesbian in a past life i will die on this hill)

- bi4bi percabeth

- some of the apollo kids give out free stick-n-poke tattoos. will has a small treble clef on his hip for his mom, nico has a tiny skull behind his left ear, percy has a smiley face on his right middle finger bc he thought it was funny

- annabeth tried to act like she didn’t think it was funny and called him an idiot

- ella also gives out free tattoo services at camp jupiter, and camp half blood when she and tyson visit. frank told her to start charging for them, but being a harpy, she doesn’t really have a need for money. honestly, she just wants an excuse to do more tattoos, since there’s not a lot of space left on tyson

- percy always orders blue food or drinks when he’s out if it’s an option (basically canon in the senior year adventures). at this point it’s instinctual

- percy refuses to drink or smoke bc of gabe. sally understands this and that’s why, before she had estelle, she would only have a single glass of wine with dinner. annabeth likes to have a few drinks here and there, but when she does drink, she makes sure to never do it in front of percy

- dionysus is essentially the camp therapist, because deep down, he really does care about the campers. he has open office hours and a sign-up sheet for appointments (private or group therapy) in the big house

- percy has started calling dionysus the wrong name back, and it’s dissolved into a competition to see who can think of the most ridiculous names (so far perceval jackoff and destiny’s child are tied for first place). some of the other campers are waiting for the day dionysus turns percy into a bottlenose dolphin or a pile of dust and ashes, but he would never do it

- there’s also a sign-up sheet to use that single computer that chiron has, where everyone gets up to an hour of screen time

- after discovering the projector in chiron’s office, it’s common to find cabins or individual groups of campers having movie nights. nico and hazel’s boyfriends and friends use this as an opportunity to show them (when hazel visits) different movies. for example, one night percy brings all 3 back to the future movies (he doesn’t realize the irony until nico won’t stop teasing him about it), annabeth brings the last unicorn, which makes hazel cry (me too girl), piper brings jennifer’s body (hazel and frank both get all flustered during the sex scenes, nico is surprisingly unbothered until will nudges him and makes a comment about colin when he appears onscreen), reyna, on the rare occasions that the hunters visit, brings isle of dogs (she hasn’t watched a lot of movies, but that one is one of her favorites), frank brings the little prince, which makes percy openly sob, and will brings heathers, to nico’s surprise

- some camp traditions include telling ghost stories at the campfire, karaoke nights in the apollo cabin (they tried to hold one in the big house once, but that only lasted about ten minutes before dionysus kicked them out), secret santas, halloween parties, and thanksgiving at the jackson-blofis house for the year-round campers (and percy, annabeth, tyson, and ella, ofc)

- piper likes to walk around doing chappell roan’s vocal flips and reneé rapp’s riffs

- will is actually a pretty good singer, but he doesn’t think he is bc his powers are more focused on his role as a camp medic, so he compares himself to his siblings. he can also play guitar really well, but his favorite thing is playing it horribly and as loud as possible, or playing at nico because he knows he hates it

- will and annabeth both struggle with imposter syndrome, percy starts talking to dionysus about his ptsd, nico is working on breaking his disordered eating habits, and tyson makes ella a fidget that she can play with so she doesn’t pull out her feathers

- piper and leo like to call each other cunts and reference modern pop culture in front of chiron, who is eternally confused and has stopped trying to understand “the youth”

- annabeth is a swiftie (her favorite album is ttpd) and percy says he isn’t, but sally sometimes catches him singing “safe & sound” or “never grow up” to estelle (he has no idea she knows) and sends videos of it to annabeth. he can’t sing very well, don’t get me wrong, and it’s almost always off-key, but estelle doesn’t seem to mind

- percy does that thing that dads do where he stands at the edge of the room when estelle is watching one of her shows with sally and pretends he isn’t watching it, but eventually ends up sitting with them on the couch and singing (again, very poorly) along to the bluey theme song

- will isn’t actually a morning person, but as the camp medic, he’s just used to getting up at the ass-crack of dawn and running on three hours of sleep and multiple celsiuses (this is why, on “making-nico-and-hazel-watch-movies-we-think-are-important-movie-nights,” he never even makes it through the first one without crashing out)

- apollo did in fact develop a little crush on nico during the tower of nero, but for his son’s sake, he’ll take that secret to his grave (metaphorically ofc)

[punkeropercyjackson]

Y'know what i love making lists apperantly so here's one clearing up the misconceptions re Pjo characters and lgbt stuff/gender

Percy is NOT masculine in any way PLEASE at least not in a white way(afropunk),literally every transfem in the fandom i've met which have been a loooooot think she's an egg and a very femme one specifically.They're the ones who use Percy's actual personality and story too so they're right and they should say it

Idc about your opinion on Percabeth,Annabeth is a wlw and it dosen't need to involve Percy in any way,especially if you make jokes about her being a girl like she's actually a binary guy(if you do chances are you've never had a girlfriend)

Thalia's not a pick me,she's a 90s/2000s girl raised who's mentally and physically 15.Also has as much tgirl swag as Percy does and is probs a lesbian(Goth transbian swag specifically and all That with Reyna)

Piper is even LESS of a pick me,it's right there in the text that femininity was ruined for Piper because of racist white girl bullies and didn't have native girl friends to help her reclaim it and Rick's a pussy for not making her a brown butch queen.Do not buy into the propaganda,it's made by trans girlypop Percy haters so they're overcompensating

Nico is nobody's [insert sexual word here],he's 15 and a touchestarved trauma gay who's scared to ask for affection.Also Percy's not his type personality wise,not physical apperance wise and this is what was said in the scene that launched the trope of Percy sexually harrasing him as 'comedy' by people who've never had boyfriends and also why they think Jason and Nico were queerbait

Speaking of Jason,pretty much any orientation makes perfect sense but he's definitely a tboy,Percy literally said he looks like Superman and he was raised by a wolfwoman

Leo is not ugly or an incel,people are just racist.Also he's the other side of Percy's coin Luke stans think he is

Luke's not gay-coded and i'd argue he comes off as a chaser more than anything consider all That with Percy,Annabeth,Thalia AND Silena who's a parallel to Patrochilles with Clarisse

Butch lesbian Clarisse is not stereotyping but playing off lesbian history amd reclamation because Rick highkey made her a caricature of fat butch lesbians

Fr*zel bad,Hazel's a lesbian who's never had a good dynamic with a guy that way

Also Frank is transmasc.His arc is about being emasculated for both being chinese-canadian and his personality on it's own but reclaiming manhood for himself and Mars' blessing is straight up called testosterone in the narration

Y'all can forget about Percy fucking those old men cause she described finding old dudes not handsome at least twice lol(and one of them was Luke LOL).She's 18 and as a 23 year old who wouldn't date an old person either cause like her i pull age appropriate people instead of being desperate

And not technically Pjo but Alex is textually a transfem who hates being theythemed.Rick's intentions are irrelevant,that's a common irl transfem thing and to erase that is transmisogyny

[gerardpilled]

That post abt listing over Gerard- I'm a lesbian too, I literally never considered men as partners yk I was like I'll never marry until I realized u can marry girls and blah blah blah- I'm 21 and I'm like gold star hard core lesbian hut I'm still lusting over Gerard even though I found him wayyyyyyy after my lesbian realization thing- I ignore everything masculine abt him or shit he's said just because of that, is that weird- like no man matches not even like really handsome actors- I think it's just the way Gerard holds himself? Frank compared to him is very regular- I also refuse to think this is abt looks because there are alot more good looking men that I literally dont like to look at. Are you like this too? Sorry if this is weird- I'm so insecure abt this only my gf knows and she usually just calls me delusional for how I imagine Gerard but like it's nice to find someone similar ig? Like is this normal? Sorry if this is all gibberish btw I haven't read through it I'm tired-

i mean i don't have a 1-to-1 relation to this, but i get you. i don't think it's weird at all, especially because we are so far removed from gerard lol. like it's easy to kinda just see him as a sort of masc lesbian if you tune your brain that way. I probably would have a different view of him if i was hanging out with him and knew him on a personal level. Like if I was in the room with him and given the chance to have sex with him i would not 😭. i dont think that makes either of us less of a lesbian or whatever lol

[valleyfthdolls]

What about the clubs? Not every character in them, but the groups as a whole

Hang on lemme google the clubs again

Cooking club: The cooking club gets extra credit for their involvement. They’re kind of exclusive: kids with bad reputations are not allowed in their club. They’re otherwise the same- pretty tight knit, very positive, and they have a lot of respect for Amai.

Drama club: Only describes the students who engage in the drama program year round and not just during show season. Some of the members are very hardcore and look down on people who won’t engage year round (such as Kizana and, to a lesser extent, Tsuzuro). As of 2019 (when my rewrite takes place), they are performing Yotsuya Kaidan, one of the most influential Japanese ghost stories of all time. They’re not very close- in fact, they tend to be quite competitive, even though they do bond during production.

Occult club: A religious group with a focus on spiritualism. Believes the school is haunted or at least has some kind of a negative energy. (They are right.) Most of the occult club has decent reputations, but due to the stigma around their religious practices, they aren’t fully trusted. They’re quite tight-knit, and a bit like a coven of witches.

Art club: The art club has a pretty good reputation among the school because their art is used for the clubs and programs at school’s promotional posters, which livens the atmosphere of the school. It’s fun by Shoku (cooking club temp leader)’s little sister Geiju, who has presented masc/androgynous for enough of his life that people have kind of forgotten he’s a girl (butch he/him lesbian). Geiju is a little weird, but he’s well liked anyway. He has no reservations against having disliked students in his club, unless they show a disrespect for art.

Light music club: Well, if Miyuji’s bandmates don’t like you, you’re not getting in, but even if you’ve never looked at a musical instrument in your life, Miyuji has no reservations about letting people in. She has a sort of “the more, the merrier” view of it. The band as it is is pretty close, but they’re also very welcoming and will take new members under their wing without a fuss. They get on well with some of the other alt kids at school (like the gyarus- especially Hoshiko, who’s rokku gyaru- and the occult club). If Miyuji doesn’t like you, word will spread among the other alt students.

Martial arts club: It’s kind of the same, but Masato (Budo, club leader) had more of a complex about having to be a teacher to everyone. This is what drove Emiri (Raibaru) away from the club: when she stepped down as leader, she was planning to stay, but it strained her relationship with Masato because he suddenly felt totally responsible for her. Generally respected.

Photography club: Mostly photographs scenery. Will photograph whatever people want for a price. Frequently commissioned by info-chan, despite her also finding them a massive nuisance. They find it necessary to find proof of every rumor. From a gameplay standpoint, they would be an easy way to bully a student- gossip to them and let them find the proof.

Science club: The roomba is their pet. They named it wan-chan (essentially they call it “doggy”). They’re less deranged mad scientists and more a group of total nerds. Mostly computer scientists. Yaku is either a TV head kid with a working screen or a protogen furry. Either way I think he made the screen himself and he’s not allowed to wear either to school so he settles for that visor.

Sports club: Don’t care about these people. To be frank I always forget they exist.

Gardening club: Uekiya is kind to everyone, but I figure she’d probably also not allow club members with bad reputations.

Gaming club: Also a bunch of massive nerds. Actually an e-sports team and compete nationwide. They’re also pretty competitive, but in a friendly way. That being said, they’re not really close, and new members fit in about as well as anyone else.

Delinquents: Were bullied in middle school and adopted the delinquent persona to protect themselves, but they are an outright criminal gang. In the game, Sakyu says that they protect bullied students, but not only do we never see this, they actually do the opposite: they physically harass and assault classmates for getting too close to them, berate and insult everyone who passes by, and when Ayano tries to become their friend, they assume it’s because she’s being bullied and needs help, and they ridicule her for it. I would lean into this: the delinquents became your stereotypical boy bullies to protect themselves against bullying. The bullying thing is something I’ll get into in a sec.

Student council: An entirely formal relationship. They’re very hard on new members.

Gyarus: A group of social but highly defensive and combative girls. All of them having been bullied for their styles (as well as Kashiko for being half black, Hoshiko for her weight, and Kokoro for being trans), they’re quick to become defensive against others. They’re VERY tight knit and bordering on a polyamorous relationship of some kind. It would take a lot to fully fit in with them. They beef a lot with the delinquents.

Clubless students: Hosho, Hazuki and Otohiko (Horuda, Hazu and Otohiko) stick together mostly because they’re all really shy and bullied students. Hosho hangs around the art club, but is too shy to draw, Hazuki likes sewing, but the only other seamstress in school is Ayano, and Otohiko I feel likes crossword puzzles a lot which is a very niche thing to like. All of them are very forgiving of students with bad reputations- Otohiko has a reputation as an easy target, Hosho as a freak and a creep, and Hazuki as an unsocialized weirdo. Toga and Kyuji are not really friends with them, but they’re all kinda at the same spot in life, so there’s some solidarity there. Kyuji and Toga are kinda close, though.

The rainbow kids: they’re there! In my rewrite :) Yui and Haruto are lowkey bullies.

As for the bullying thing, I think it’s been mentioned that in the main game, there’s supposed to be 5 levels of bullying so here’s what I imagine that like. Most groups engage in the bullying, all feeling justified in doing so. Content warning for increasingly more traumatic bullying.

Level 1: Students start gossiping. The gyarus will cut the victim off if they were friends and the delinquents will become more aggressive. The photography club will look for proof that the rumors are true. Domino effects will begin among friend groups- one student dislikes the victim, which makes their friends dislike them, which makes their friends dislike them. The victim will be removed, if applicable, from the gardening or cooking club.

Level 2: The victim will be removed from any clubs. They will begin getting pranked and having their belongings stolen. Notes will be left in their locker.

Level 3: Bullies will begin interacting with the victim physically: classmates will push them out of the way and trip them, delinquents will threaten them, etc. They will begin to write on their desk.

Level 4: Bullying turns physical. Delinquents will beat the victim if they see them.

Level 5: At this point, the victim will withdraw from school or worse.

[luckycheesefoodie321]

Tyrant’s Tomb was great

Burning Maze ended on such a somber note that I really appreciated the hopeful outlook of this one. ESPECIALLY after the heart attack that was Frank Zhang’s almost death.

While I would appreciate a look at the initial war that New Rome went through when Leo came by, coming in the aftermath really set the tone from the beginning (I mean aside from former god Apollo rocking up with the coffin of Jason Grace and the subsequent funeral)… these people had experienced a tentative victory with heavy losses and the prospect of facing their own fallen comrades in the ensuing days. And then to add salt to wound, one of their former praetors and hero of New Rome and of the last great prophecy, Jason Grace, had died.

Like talk about oof??

Then Apollo himself, was just snowballing more and more with his wounds, and his past sins come to haunt him. Like he died! For three seconds before his sister revived him. But it was a straight downward spiral until the very end. A spiral that really started in Burning Maze. And I kinda appreciate the storytelling arc of it all.

Apollo coming to acknowledge and repent for the absolutely abhorrent actions of his past. Him and Meg finally acknowledging their bond and love formed in their time together. Him recognising how at home he has felt amongst humans, more so than his divine family. Battling with all the delightful human trials of regret, loneliness, longing, guilt, grief, heartache, sacrifice… and still carrying on in spite of these feelings.

And then when he got to see Diana/Artemis?! And he just says “hi. I love you. I missed you!!” Him calling his sister for godly help. And then Thalia confirming Diana has been feeling just as agonised and anxious over Apollo’s turning human. After being beaten down again and again, it’s nice to see Apollo does have family that loves him. Both new and old.

Really feeling the momentum here. Burning Maze felt weirdly standstill to me in terms of story progression. Which is maybe why I struggled with it a little. Like there was a brief plateau to introduce the final emperor, sort out Meg’s past and give Apollo one incredibly traumatic event to truly understand the value of human life and give him an in to Camp Jupiter… and then Tyrant’s Tomb was a rush. Like everything surged up again.

Interestingly while I was very sad and generally bummed about Jason dying, and shocked when Frank had his fakeout death bc I wasn’t expecting it… I actually teared up when Reyna stepped down as Praetor.

That felt like such fulfilment. Over the years speculation surged around Reyna being bi, being lesbian, being ace but even with that technically never addressed (and all of these and more are perfectly valid), I really liked where they left her. If she wants a romantic relationship in future, good for her. If she doesn’t, also good for her. But what she needs is to be with herself and not the person everyone looks to for guidance. Someone who can breathe and take in the moment around her. To be with a supportive group of people and a good friend who won’t expect anything other than for her to BE. And I love that it takes the awkward asking out of a former god for her to realise she doesn’t need to be in a romantic relationship and she doesn’t even really want one at that time. And getting hung up over it was not making her happy.

So when she’s just watching Frank do the funeral rites, she’s already resolved. Despite her fighting and kicking to go and help in the war with A BROKEN LEG, anxious to the point of obsession, they still succeeded without her. Because they were already in good hands. And so she didn’t need to keep hers on. So she lets go and does something for herself. And I love that the legionnaires expected it but they still felt sad about it. But they knew it was what she wanted.

But she will always be rooting for her home. So when she takes the Hunters oath, and looks back up at her former legion, and says “thanks to you all. Long live Rome!” And they give her a standing ovation??? Man I felt the emotions and tears well up. And I’m so glad for her.

And I LOVE THAT HAZEL BECAME PRAETOR. FRANK AND HAZEL BEING THE POWER COUPLE OF THE CENTURY IS MY EVERYTHING. I’m so glad. And I love that everyone agreed. And good for Lavinia getting the job and the girl. They really pulled a left field with her leadership abilities shining through.

Only thing I have to reconcile is the image that Tyson is tattooed from neck to calf. Plus he has Rainbow on his kidney. I’m glad he and Ella are doing well tho.

Anyway I think Tyrant’s Tomb might be my favourite.

[wint-er]

Trans!Jason Grace Headcanons

Because @speedytherandom made a post about it and I had Inspiration™. This sort of a bullet fic idk this turned into something. I’m going with afab and ftm for this btw. He also doesn’t die in this situation but that's really subtle so it doesn't really affect the hcs

Was Originally Amara Grace (This means Love and the name originated in ancient Greece so I thought it fitted)

Because he was taken so young he didn’t really know what being trans for a long time.

Luckily because he spent all his time with the wolves, they didn’t really mind him having his hair short and wearing traditionally boy clothes because it made it easier for him to train

He never really knew why he liked dressing like that, it just made him feel more comfortable so he never really questioned it.

Once he got to New Rome he had to grow his hair out because it was too short to tie back,

She/Her pronouns made him uncomfortable, the same as being called Amara but he didn’t know why so he didn’t really do anything about it.

He didn’t get too much dysphoria when puberty started, because they were so active his chest never really got too big and he would wear sports bras because it was more comfortable than the normal one so that helped a bit.

He got his first period around the same time Reyna arrived and he completely freaked out and got some pretty awful dysphoria from that.

Around the time of the titan war he started questioning more intensely about why she/her pronouns made him uncomfortable, he decided to talk to Reyna about it

They looked into it together and figured out that he was trans

Jason didn’t really want to come out to camp but Reyna started using he/him pronouns when they were alone together, especially while they were trying to come up with a name

They settled on Jason because of his ties to Hera and because Jason said it felt right.

After the titan war the first thing Jason did as praetor was come out and cut his hair short.

He also started sort of a gsa to help other younger campers

This was also when Reyna came out as a Ace Lesbian (Oh look at that all of a sudden its wormed its way into my personal head canons universe-)

He started taking hormones that same Summer.

When Hera did the switching thing, she made sure that he remembered himself as Jason Grace, the same as the rest of the kids on the bus.

This is the one of the only redeeming things Hera did according to Annabeth

She also left the knowledge that he was trans so that he knew to talk to someone and get hormones

Unfortunately Jason didn’t know who to talk to at camp to get them and didn’t quite feel safe coming out there yet so for most of tlh he went without them.

Jason came out to Piper and Leo during one of their heart to hearts while settling down for the night.

Leo gave him a hug and told him that he was proud of him and thanked him for trusting him enough to tell him.

Piper also gave him a hug and also asked if he had any pads/tampons on him because A) She was on her period and needed more and B) because if he didn’t she would buy extra at the supermarket.

They all cried.

There was a little bit of confusion with Thalia but she got over it pretty quick as there was a trans girl in the hunt. (Also shes a They/Them Lesbian)

Thalia also said that he was a very handsome boy but he was an even cuter baby

Jason may have cried at that.

Once they got back to camp he went and spoke to Will Solace in the infirmary about taking hormones again.

Cue epic bonding moment

When Jason came out on the Argo 2 the response were positive, Percy clapped him on the shoulder and grinned at him

Annabeth thanked him for trusting them enough to tell them

Frank was also really supportive

Hazel needed a bit of help understanding but otherwise was really supportive.

During the c*pid scene, after the whole drama thing Jason came out to Nico and offered his support by saying that the 7 were really supportive and until he was ready to come out to others he would be there to help him and support him.

Got his bottom surgery before the events of burning maze

And plans to get top surgery at some point in the future

Jason also spoke to Mr D about a more permanent way of taking hormones because he sometimes forgot, so Mr D is considering helping

(He totally is not trying to bribe Mr D into it, no, definitely not.)

So yeah that's all I’ve got, hopefully this was good, I may also do ones where he interacts with the other characters I hc as LGBTQIA+ (aka a lot of them)

[aknosde]

sorry for asking for your writing for the third time in like two days straight but plz plz PLZ give me more nico and percy (and thalia too if you want) platonic fluff i just really need it

Okay yes, greek kids of the big three coming right up (I'm programmed for angst but i tried to limit it)(other thing that’s funny is that im working on hcs for Percy, Reyna, Hazel, and Frank right now too)

They all pretty much call each other their cousins, but Thalia really likes to call Percy and Nico “cuz” independently because she thinks it’s the most annoying thing in the world and she likes to say it ironically. (The irony has been lost. It’s been lost for a really really long time)

Thalia: Hey cuz!

Percy: Hi Thals.

Thalia: See, “cuz.” It’s so stupid it’s funny.

Percy: *weak laugh* yeah... funny

-

They were all sent reeling after Bianca’s death. Nico of course ran off and became emo. But Thalia shoved herself into the hunters, barely giving a thought to Nico and Percy because it was too painful. She essentially cut communication between her and Percy for 3-6 months, and only started talking to him again after Mt. St. Helens. Percy shut himself up with guilt and spent all of his time looking for Nico so he could ‘repay his debt’ It wasn’t really a good time for anyone.

What Thalia is not saying: sorry for making you take the prophecy

What Percy is not saying: I feel like I killed Bianca

-

Nico likes to call Mrs. O’Leary his dog even though she is very clearly Percy’s. They argue about it all the time, but it’s all in good fun.

Nico: See, I’m her favorite. She can sense the darkness

Percy: You have all the darkness of a rainbow. Watch this. Mrs. O’Leary!

*Mrs. O’Leary comes bounding over to Percy where she immediately flops onto her stomach and waits for Percy to pet her belly*

-

In fact, Thalia is the only one of them who doesn’t like Mrs. O’Leary. Something Percy and Nico take great advantage of. They like to shadow travel Mrs. O’Leary directly into the center of the Hunters’ camps when Thalia is close by and scare her. She accidentally stabbed herself once because of it.

Thalia: So I went over to pick up my shield, because I love my shield you see, and then they appeared like ‘blarghhh’

-

Thalia would never admit it, but she’s scared shitless of Percy when he gets really mad. She often thinks about that time he lifted the whole creek of water and ice above her head, and thinks it’s really cool, but she’s also terrified of ever having to fight him in any real capacity. 

Percy: Hey look, I learned how to make daggers out of ice

Thalia: ah, cool

Thalia internally: what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck

-

None of them like fast-food from the same place. And Percy’s the only one who can drive. He’s too nice to make them all go to his pick though, even if they argue a lot. 

Thalia and Nico: McDonalds! McDonalds! McDonalds!

Percy *pulling up to the drive through*: one black coffee

Jokes on them because coffee makes Percy super tired so he basically traps them. No but seriously, Nico likes McDonalds, Percy likes Wendy’s, and Thalia likes Burger King. Percy drives around to all of their respective locations while Thalia blasts music and Nico hangs in the middle seat poking at them. They sit on the roof of some building and eat together.

-

Together they form some version of a holy trinity. Thalia = lesbian, Nico = gay, Percy = bi. You are never safe.

Percy and Nico, from the capture the flag jail: Let’s go lesbians! Let’s go lesbians!

Thalia: *sprinting across the boundary*

-

Actually they have a lot of overlap, kind of like a Venn diagram. Powers, music they like, it’s kinda funny. 

Random camper: So which one of you can control the earth?

Percy and Nico: *both raise their hands slowly*

Random camper: And which one of you can change the temperature?

Nico and Thalia: *slowly raise their hands*

Random camper: Great, and which one of you can sense and control the weather?

Percy and Thalia: *both raise their hands*

-

They are not allowed to spar together. Percy and Thalia especially. Emotions run high. Both Percy and Thalia can spar with Nico, but they can’t go all three of them either. The last time all three of them trained together a hill split down the middle, flowers from a certain patch now only grow black, and a big streak of plants were burned. 

Percy, drawing water from an underground spring and turning the very soil under Thalia’s feet to quicksand and forming a giant puddle: Sorry, I can’t hear you from up here!

Nico, shadow traveling Percy into the same trap: What was that you said about being ‘up here’?

Thalia, conjuring a bolt of electricity, shocking them all: hmm?

-

Percy is the tallest out of the three of them, and rather than fight it like Thalia did at the beginning, they accept it and make him being the tallest as inconvenient as possible for him. They make sure things are on the highest shelf so he has to get them down. They climb on him like a jungle gym.

Nico, sitting on Percy’s shoulders: Could you pass me a juice box?

Thalia, latched onto Percy’s back: Sure.

The counselor Percy is having a very important conversation with: uhh

Percy, ignoring them: So what I’m saying is that I can’t bend on having the glass replaced with an extra durable substitute. 

[girlactionfigure]

In "Long Walk to Freedom", Nelson Mandela said:

"No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite."

~~~~~

His tombstone has no name.

He was called "a man of a great many ethics, and very intense about his human rights beliefs, causes he could never put down."

Before his journey, however, he did and said things he would later regret.

He was born in 1943, two days after July 4th.

Growing up in a conservative environment on military bases in Georgia and South Carolina, he admitted he was a "white racist" and a homophobic.

“I spent most of my life putting others down,” he said.

He was part of the crowd shouting, "2 - 4 - 6 - 8, we don't want to integrate."

He said he "idolized the Confederate flag . . . [it was] a symbol of the past and the way things were and they should still be. Not necessarily slavery, but the white of white—the right of white oppression.”

He also subscribed to the myth that “to be gay it meant that I had to wear a woman’s dress, I had to molest little children, and I had to go in bathrooms and watch people.”

“I had a low self-image of myself. So if I could have someone who was lower than I was, the Black American… even . . . Jewish people in general . . . as long as I could put someone else down, then I wasn’t the lowest person on the totem pole. So I spent most of my life putting others down.”

“I’d use the word queer and fag*ot and put gays down,” he admitted.

~~~~~

"He followed his father’s footsteps into the Air Force in 1963 at the age of 19 and served three tours in Vietnam," according to writer David Roza in June 2021's Task and Purpose military news.

Despite the beliefs he grew up with, he became a hero.

He earned a Bronze Star for killing two Viet Cong soldiers attacking his post while he was on sentry duty, according to the Washington Post. He later earned a Purple Heart for being wounded after stepping on a Viet Cong land mine.

At that time, he still was wary of anyone different than him and still believed in the stereotypes he grew up with.

In the military, outside in the world, however, he started questioning his previous beliefs and those stereotypes.

He became friends with a Vietnamese interpreter and learned about other cultures. 

He then became friends with a Black colleague. 

After getting to know his Black friend, he told himself, “‘he’s different, he’s not like the rest.’ And then I met another Black who was different, not like the rest, and then another one who was different, not like the rest. Until I began to look around and see so many different individuals.”

He also started learning about himself.

"Over time, his bias against homosexuals began to fade, along with his bias against African-Americans, who he found himself serving alongside and taking orders from during his time in the Air Force," wrote Roza.

“One stereotype after another stereotype started to crumble,” he told The New York Times.

Learning about others led him to learn more about himself.

He realized he went to Vietnam to prove he was masculine, he said, but instead he became something more.

He found the courage to be himself.

He said he always knew, but had continued to deny it.

“In September 1975, a stunning issue of TIME magazine hit the newsstands,” according to writer Kay Tobin Lahusen. “On the cover was the photo of a young man wearing his Air Force uniform."

“I am a homosexual” read the title in bold under the airman’s uniformed portrait.

"His name tag said 'Matlovich'."

Leonard Matlovich. 

The Peace Page has previously shared stories of Leonard Matlovich, but this story includes some rare insights, including words from Matlovich himself.

~~~~~

When Matlovich appeared in Time, “It marked the first time the young gay movement had made the cover of a major newsweekly,” according to author Randy Shilts in his 1993 book "Conduct Unbecoming", about discrimination against lesbians and gays in the military. “To a movement still struggling for legitimacy, the event was a major turning point.”

“Even the most hardened homophobe had to take pause when he reviewed Matlovich’s record,” Shilts wrote. “Credentials such as a Bronze Star, a Purple Heart, and twelve years of outstanding service meant something that civilians could barely imagine.”

Matlovich's media appearances had a big effect on America,” according to David Addlestone, a lawyer with the American Civil Liberties Union. "He was a patriotic, conservative middle-class war hero. He destroyed the popular myth of homosexuality."

Matlovich, the LGBTQ rights pioneer, was the first gay service member to purposely out himself to the military to fight their ban on gays, and perhaps the best-known openly gay man in the United States of America in the 1970s next to Harvey Milk.

He was “inspired and guided by gay rights pioneer Frank Kameny, who had been looking for a test court case to challenge the military’s ban on homosexuals," according to Making Gay History.

“He … was the epitome of a perfect soldier, one of those people that stuck his neck out, and he was proud to be the person to challenge that law,” Jeff Dupre, a longtime friend of Matlovich, told NPR in 2015.

He “was the kind of serviceman the air force prided itself on,” according to writer Naveena Kottoor.

When he finally came out, at the age of 30, he was  warned that he would be throwing “away 13 years of military service and a pension", according to Addlestone.

When “an Air Force attorney asked him if he would sign a document pledging to ‘never practice homosexuality again’ in exchange for being allowed to remain in the Air Force,” he refused.

He replied that “he couldn't live a lie" any longer.

In October of 1975 - despite his exemplary military record, tours of duty in Vietnam, and high performance evaluations - Leonard Matlovich was ruled unfit for service and discharged, according to Back 2 Stonewall.

“In 1980 he finally won reinstatement, which he declined; the Air Force upgraded him to an honorable discharge,” according to "Gay Alternatives".

~~~~~

“Throughout American history, LGBTQ+ citizens have fought to defend our rights and freedoms -- from the Founding of our nation to the Civil War, from the trenches of two World Wars to Korea and Vietnam, and from Afghanistan to Iraq,” said Secretary of Defense Lloyd J. Austin III in the Opening Remarks at DOD Pride Month Event, June 9, 2021.

“They fought for our country even when our country wouldn’t fight for them . . . Even as some were forced to hide who they were… or to hang up their uniforms.”

~~~~~

Matlovich’s case inspired other enlisted gay and lesbian people to fight for their right to serve, including Navy officer Vernon E. “Copy” Berg, according to Making Gay History.

“Matlovich’s LGBTQ activism did not end with his court case. He lent his voice and influence to several battles against homophobia: Anita Bryant’s anti-gay crusade; California Proposition 6, which sought to ban gay and lesbian teachers from public schools.”

In June 1987, Matlovich was one of 64 demonstrators arrested protesting the White House’s AIDS policies,” according to the Washington Post.

“He also contributed to the founding of Affirmation, an affinity group for LGBTQ Mormons, and forced Northwest Airlines to end its discriminatory policy regarding passengers with AIDS.”

“Matlovich [is also] lovingly memorialized on the AIDS Quilt."

In June 2019, Matlovich was one of the inaugural 50 American “pioneers, trailblazers, and heroes” inducted on the National LGBTQ Wall of Honor within the Stonewall National Monument (SNM) in New York City’s Stonewall Inn, the first U.S. national monument dedicated to LGBTQ rights and history, and the wall’s unveiling was timed to take place during the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall riots.

~~~~~

Matlovich said that his fight was inspired by Dr, Martin Luther King, Jr. whose portrait he had in his home.

"He explicitly gave credit to the black Civil Rights Movement, and Martin Luther King Jr. specifically, for giving him more courage to understand that gays were a minority group and they had not just the right, but the obligation to fight for their own rights," said Michael Bedwell, Matlovich's best friend and estate executor.

Dr. Martin Luther King said, "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere", which his widow Coretta Scott King reminded everyone of, when she spoke out for gay rights.

In an interview with Studs Terkel, Matlovich said, "the debt I owe to Black Americans, and probably the debt that America owes to Black Americans, probably will never be repaid. Because they have shown us that through perseverance and determination, the laws can be changed, and attitudes can be changed.”

It inspired him to be a race relations counselor, easing racial tensions in the service. 

"He was brilliant at it," said Bedwell.  "At his discharge hearing, one of his supervisors that was African-American testified he was one of best race relations instructors they had."

Some of his strongest supporters were Black.

"Out of the 20-some witnesses that came on my behalf, there were three white witnesses and about 19 Black," Matlovich said. "And it seemed—to me, it was a little shameful to me that, I remember back in my white racist days, that the very individuals who I put down came to my aid when I needed it the most. I guess people can forgive and forget, and people can change . . . You’re never too old to change and to become enlightened and to change."

~~~~~

Matlovich said the most difficult part of his journey was having to tell his parents, especially his father.

“He cried when he first heard about it. It’s, it’s hard to have a child that’s gay in America today because they are so discriminated against.”

But, in the end, he supported his son, saying, “If he can take it. I can.”

The picture attached to this story from Making Gay History is 19-year-old Leonard Matlovich, center, at his Air Force induction, May 1963. At right is his father, Air Force veteran Leonard C. Matlovich. Credit: Courtesy of the Matlovich Family.

~~~~~

“Just to love and be loved, I think is very, very beautiful,” Matlovich said. “And that parents growing up today will give our little children guns, and we are very proud of them when they play Cowboys and Indians and run around. But when they show emotions and, and love. . . people get uptight, and they’re so afraid that their child may, may love. It’s very sad.”

Growing up and realizing he was gay, he said in an interview with the New York Times in 1975:

"I cried. I wept, hoping it would change. I believed absolutely that homosexuality was terrible and degrading."

In the interview with Terkel, he said:

“Jesus said that you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free. And I believe that truth is who you are and what you are. And once you know those things, you are set free. And once you can accept who you are and what you are, then you can love others. You can’t love others until you love yourself, and as long as you hate yourself you’re gonna hate others.”

In his last public speech before he died, Matlovich tearfully said, “I want you to look at the flag, our rainbow flag, and I want you to look at it with pride in your heart, because we too have a dream. And what is our dream? Ours is more than an American dream. It's a universal dream. Because in South Africa, we're black and white, and in Northern Ireland, we're Protestant and Catholic, and in Israel we're Jew and Muslim. And our mission is to reach out and teach people to love, and not to hate. "

~~~~~

Matlovich said, “I knew, for example, that when Americans went to the Vietnam Memorial to remember and honor those who gave their lives fighting that horrible war, it never occurred to them that some of those who were the strongest, bravest and most heroic were also gay.”

He was buried with full military honors at the Congressional Cemetery in Washington, D.C. The inscription on his tombstone, which he wrote himself and is meant to be a memorial to all gay veterans, has no name. 

It simply reads:

"A Gay Vietnam Veteran"

and the words . . .

"When I was in the military, they gave me a medal for killing two men and a discharge for loving one."

~~~~~

“It’s a crazy mixed up world we live in," he said,  "when we’re rewarded for killing and hating, and punished for loving."

~ jsr

The Jon S. Randal Peace Page

[faustonastring]

Could I get headcanons for the main six with mc who is obsessed with stuffed animals?

Thanks for requesting I hope you like it :)

Request are open! :))

Main six with an mc who is obsessed with stuffed animals

Asra

He thinks it’s the cutest thing in the world

Every time he travels away from you, he always brings you one back that represents where he traveled (a modern day example would be a teddy bear with a sombrero to represent Mexico, (just so you get the picture)) he also gets to them as presents for birthdays and holidays anniversaries

In a modern au, you both more or likely have a beanie baby collection hiding somewhere in the shop, you both probably brought another beanie baby snail so you could recreate the “snesbian”(snail lesbian) wedding you saw on tiktok

Early in you’re relationship (pre-upright) before he can take you on trips with him he finds it really comforting to know that you have a cuddle buddy or two to keep you company while he’s away, but after you’ve been together for a while (post-upright) don’t be surprised when you wake up and all your stuffed animals are on the floor (that is if you sleep with them of course!)

I also really like the idea of asra trying to make you a stuffed animal for your birthday or anniversary, or any other celerbration (something a like his Faust trinket you can get from the wheel, just a little more improved, )

Apologies in advance for the angst BUT If you’ve had this obsession pre-memory lost, when you’re,,,, y’know (trying to keep this as spoiler free as I can for some of the new guys!) he clutches on to it every night while he’s trying to sleep, crying out you’re name, (and probably uses it in his studies to try to get you back,) and post-y’know, he brings it with him during all his trips because of how much he hates being away from you, and if you’ve grown fond of that one, he’ll bring another one you like a lot, he feels bad but he can’t help it, he just misses you so much

Also some of you are gonna hate me for this but piggy backing off of that angst I just wrote, imagine Julian and asra in the shop, doing...their....studies..(if you know you know) and Julian just sees the stuffed animal in the bed and asks why asra has it (and being himself try’s to make a joke about asra needing to sleep with a stuffed animal, when he can just sleep with him instead-) and asra just kicks him out, and they never talk about it again.

Nadia

She’s on it. She’ll ask you a million questions, “what kind do you like, do you need to sleep with any, do you want a custom one, or a spefic kind?”

Her room is so cluttered with stuffed animals by the end of the week, that she makes you pick out you’re favorite one (which quickly turns into ten or twenty) and the rest go to their own separate room in the palace, where they’re put on display, and easily accessible for you to switch out with any of the ones In you’re too, that you’re bored with

In a modern au I feel like Nadia would also be on bored for collecting beanie babies, but unlike asra who’s only in it for the snesbian wedding she wants all of the rare ones doesn’t matter how much they cost, she has them, it’s not even about you at this point, when Nadia gets a kick you just gotta let her ride it out.

I think it’s canon (or atleast close to canon) that Nadia loves to design clothes, I mean we all know she loves to tinker, but I think she’ll find it really relaxing destining new stuffed animals with you and clothes for some of the ones you already have if you’d want (and yes. She makes matching ones for you and you’re favorites)

If you do sleep with them, Nadia might find it a little hard to sleep with all the clutter around the bed so she’ll thoss the ones your not cuddling off the bed (or if she’s having a real sleepless night, she’ll throw them across the room) but nonetheless if you’re happy she’s happy, she’ll never get agitated at you for having your own interest (despite tripping over like three of them while trying to start her day)

Also I feel like atleast one of Nadias sisters had that stuffed animal phase as a kid, if you know baby....then you know so I feel like it’s really refreshing for her to be able to keep stuffed animals around without having to hear someone scream and whine because they couldn’t get the one they wanted

Julian

The day after you tell him he brings you a doctor teddy bear, wearing a hand-sewn eye patch witch Portia more or likely helped him make (note that I said helped he wanted to try to make it on his own... but surgical stitches are a lot diffrent from things such as cross stitches,,,, and the fabric is just a lot more flimsy then human flesh)

He likes to bring you ‘fun’ ones as he calls them, teddy bears dressed as pirates, doctors, flappers, any kind that matches you’re faveroite animal, pigs decked out in fancy clothes (the vesuvia verson of Miss piggy) espically if he knows you like them, he would do anything to see you laugh and smile, especially if it’s from one of his gifts, it makes his heart jump

In a modern au, you could spend your quality time making fun of the ridiculous beanie baby prices, but for the love of god please don’t say you find a beanie baby who’s highest bidding price is over one hundred dollars cute, because HE WILL bid on it and the price DOESNT MATTER (also- self indulgent but If you have a furby espically the older ones, it will freak Julian the hell out, and he will quickly turn it so it’s not looking at him every time he enters a room)

Every time you travel together he checks all the touristy gift shops for a stuffed animal you like, and will happily buy you any type you like, and it doesn’t matter how big it is. He WILL make it fit in his suit case, even if it means he has to leave a couple pairs of shoes behind.....

If you sleep with any of you’re stuffed animals he doesn’t mind, I mean sure he ends up laying on a couple of them, and the do end up getting tangled in his limbs, but he finds it cute and is willing to make a sacrifice, and if he were to come in late from working overtime and caught you sleeping cuddling the doctor teddy bear he gave you....with the eyepatch that he helped make....he wouldn’t want to disturb you... so he pulls up a chair and watches you sleep in the least creepy way possible

If you two are ever trying to do the do and your stuffed animal is In the room... or even better facing towards the bed... I think it would make Julian the slightest bit uncomfortable but would just laugh it off and say something along the lines of “I didn’t know we had and audience” or “looks like we have a guest” which would be terrifying if he were to say that mid-ya know

Portia

You two vibe so hard

Out of everyone I feel like she is definitely the most enthusiastic and chill about having stuffed animals in her cottage, and I mean sure they’re everywhere and she’s tripped on atleast six of them... but as long as pepi doesn’t get too any of them( again) you’re fine

I like to imagine she has something (other than Julian) that survived the ship wreck with her, wether that be a blanket or a stuffed animal (for the sake of this head canon it’s a stuffed animal) that she holds very close to her yes this is very unlikely given, well all the factors but she deserves something, and if your really against that idea, a little stuffed animal Julian gave her when she was a kid before he left

I can’t keep headcanoning that every one has a thing for beanie babies in a modern au, even though she has a snesbian wedding in her garden with a snesbian officiant which she photographs and gets tiktok famous off of.... she’ll be more into anything Sanrio related, like don’t leave this girl alone in round one because she’s already spent 150 trying to win the rilakkuma stuffed animal that’s riiiiight over the edge (after many many try’s, she does win it, and gives it to you)

She is the type to sew, or crochet, or even knit you stuffed animals, and those are usually the ones she ends up giving you, if not? They definitely were handmade from somewhere, probably a small shop or from an old lady selling them at the heart district

If you sleep with stuffed animals....well good news because so does she! Throughout the night not only are you to fighting for the blanket (if it’s during winter) but now you’re fighting over the stuffed animals, and every night as soon as one of you says you’re going to bed, it’s a race to see who can get to bed first and hog all the stuffed animals, (which may lead to a pillow fight if you’re lucky)

One time pepi tore up one of you’re faveroite stuffed animals and Portia felt so bad about it that she not only made pepi her own toys to play with, but sewed up your toes up one, and if it was beyond repair, she would make you an identical one

(Also Portia is the type to spend 100 dollars at a carnival trying to knock the milk bottles down so she can win her s/o a cheap stuffed dog that pepi is gonna claw into anyway...but it’s the thought that counts :’) )

Muriel

Does. Not. Understand. But hey! He’s trying~! A+ for effort right?

He wants to make it clear that it’s NOTHING to do with you, he finds it ADORBALE! He really really does and he’s trying hard to express that but depending where you are in your relationship with him....makes a little bit of a difference, so for the sake of the headcanon muriels headcanon is gonna be soon after his upright endeding so expect some assumptions about his character but I do know that people just don’t change over night so one things for sure....he still doses to fully understands soft nice things

I think Muriel likes to hear you talk, like sure he prefers the quiet, but out of everyone in the world, your the only person he doesn’t mind listening to (how sweet! ) so he probably asks you a lot of questions, but not necessarily like Julian, more questions that ask why you like them, because he wants to like them too, and you want him to like them too, but you do still have some work ahead of you

In a modern au.....build a bear dates @lisa-frank-cave did a headcanon on it a while back that I REALLY liked, it is a little buried so if you’re having trouble finding it lmk and I can reblog it for you, but atleast visits their page and look for it because their stuff is super good! :) so for sure go check out their head canon for it if you want something more in depth but to just elaborate my thoughts on it, it’s just something the two of you could do together (and I feel like Muriel loves spending time with you no matter what activity it is) I also feel like he’d like being able to make something with you, which works out great if you can’t whittle to save you’re life,,,and I dunno,,,it just makes me soft,,,,

I don’t like the head canon that Muriel has bug clumsy hands, he can whittle for gods sake! And used to make masquerade masks for asra to sell pre-plague times, (and made his own in every route but his own) so I feel like Muriel would atleast attempt ONCE to sew or crochet you a stuffed animal, it’s a little tragedy looking, and over time it starts to fall apart at the seams, but he made it for you, and seeing you love it so much let’s him know all his hard work payed off, and he’ll make you another one or two

He doesn’t mind if you sleep with stuffed animals, but he apologizes in advance if they get crushed (the bed is barley big enough for the both of you) and gets a little jealous if you’re cuddling you’re stuffed animal instead of him, he won’t say anything but he’ll for sure get pouty about, and as cute as he is when he’s pouty make sure you don’t cuddle you’re stuffed animals more than him, because if you do it will start to get to him if you know what I mean

Also refuses to have sex if stuffed animals are on the bed or facing the bed, if they’re on the bed, he’ll throw them off, facing the bed, he’ll turn them around, he just doesn’t like the idea of being watching while being intimate with you

Lucio

If I’m being honest will make fun of you a tiny bit at first (he’ll stop he he strikes a nerve) but soon finds the appeal

Mama morga didn’t let him have stuffed animals growing up, for a while there she didn’t even want him sleeping with a blanket, so he’s alllll over this, but yeah you’re stuffed animals are cute, but he wants a spefic type of stuffed animals.... next thing you know Lucio says he got some stuffed animals for you two to share, and it’s just about 30 diffrent variations of goats. But hey! Atleast he offered to share!

In a modern au I feel like lucio would be overly enthusiastic to go to build a bear that he nearly crushes a kid with his knock off red bottoms trying to get in there, dragging you behind him, then impatiently rushes the whole process not making too enjoyable for you (depending on who you are of course) but lucio just seems to be having fun! (Also goes on a Saturday afternoon and they are like four kids celebrating their birthday and a line that goes out the door, unlike Muriel who goes early Sunday morning or Tuesday night to beat the crowds)

He personally likes anything goat related, but also likes custom made ones made with red velvet and and gold stitching, and will happily buy you or get any kind you want customed made, and on you’re birthday? When you wake up in the morning the room is covered with all diffrent typed of stuffed animals, and lucio is beaming proudly in the middle of it

If you sleep with them then no problem! Lucio would too! But if he catches you cuddling a certain stuffed animal more than him then it might just....disappear for a while...but if he sees you upset or worried that you can’t find it, don’t worry! It will reappear again.... or something very similar to it.....

One time Mercedes and Melchior tore up one of you’re favorite stuffed animals (again) so lucio had them kicked out of his bedroom...or so he said, what really happened is while he was waiting for your replacement to come in, he wanted to act all tuff and kick Mercedes and Melchior our to assert his dominance, but secretly still played with them and let them back in you’re room when you weren’t around. You know. But you pretend that you don’t

Thanks for reading if you would like something more spefic welll.....

My request are open! :)

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-valves]

Character review!!(1/5):

Lets not waste much time, and get right to it!team prime goes first!*

*screenshots with some characters maybe in shit quality, particularly with decepticons and their flying alt modes. Fliers don't like to sit still for the camera.

Optimus Prime!!;

Optimus prime! Boss bot! Chief! Head honcho! The all time serotonin givin machine! This Optimus is the most pure, most noble, most caring of the bunch! Ready to sacrifice himself for those in need, Optimus merely wants a future for his fellow Cybertronians. Don't be fooled by the rough and gruff outside, this dude is an absolute sweetie with plenty of character. Primes dont party, but man does this one love. 9/10!

Arcee!!;

You like lesbians? Like feral ladies? Like a smooth, sleek motorcycle? Well do I have the fem for you! Don't let this little beauty and her size fool you, she can stand toe to toe to the toughest of Decepticons. Despite her strength however, Arcee isn't the same emotionally. Her loss of partners made her put up walls thicker than Bulkhead's ass. But once you've broken down those walls, make no mistake, she'll mom the hell out of you, and will cut any bitch who threatens you. 9/10. Shes a wonderful character with a beautiful arc and she's so valid.

Bulkhead!!;

The old wrecking ball! All muscles and spark, this big guy loves off roading, construction, lob ball, and his lil girl, Miko. He's a little bit of a push over, and holds a bit of a defeatist attitude, but he loves. He'll protect everyone he cares for to the best of his abilities, and is heavily motivated by Miko's approval, or beating the absolute shit out of Breakdown. He loves as hard as he fights. 9/10! This guy was an absolutely cutie, and I want him to have a long, happy life.

Bumblebee!!;

Bumblebee! Our peppy scout! Don't let his robot dance and video game playing with Raf fool you, Bumblebee is confident, lithe, and a natural leader. Up until the final season and the movie, Bumblebee was mute, capable of only beeps, but that didn't make him any less expressive! This eventual warrior was possibly Optimus's favorite lil boy, and with how sweet this lil honeybee is, its not hard to see why! 9/10! He just checks all the boxes for a really good character!

Ratchet!!;

Doc bot, doctor, sunshine, Ratch, old friend, whatever you call him, he's still our local, salty medic. While he's got a salty attitude, make no mistake, Ratchet has the capacity to be very sweet, especially towards the children. He's also got quite the passion for all things science, and medical technology. Now im gonna be frank, this Ratchet is my FAVORITE. He's the first I've come to know, and im glad I did. Ratchet would, like Optimus, hurt himself for the sake of the team, without hesitation. 10/10. Ratchet just embodies what makes a good character 🧡.

[im-the-punk-who]

jack rackham cause I just started watching the show and I’m one season 2 and I didn’t care for him before but now I love him <3

First off, YES!! JOIN US!!! JOIN US!!!!!!!!! Okay now that that’s out of the way.

How I feel about this character

OOF. So, like you, when I first saw Jack on screen I was like WHO IS THIS RAT MAN, SOMEONE CALL THE EXTERMINATOR.

And then somewhere around mid season 2 I was like ‘I have only had rat man for 1 1/2 seasons but if anything happened to him I would laugh heartily and then cry just as heartily. 

I have some complicated feelings about Jack because on the one hand, I am incredibly fond of the garbage man, the stink brain, the absolute rat bastard. I love him and Anne, I love the dumb boy/smart lesbian hostility thing he’s got going on with Max, I love his flare and to be underestimated is a terrible gift 

But on the other hand his actions in the finale licherally make me want to throw the whole boy overboard. (Except for the parts with Anne. Jack continues to be Anne’s #1 stan and honestly I respect the HELL out of him for it.)

Like, how do i feel. How, does one, feel, about an over ripe smoldering garbage bag that is Lisa Frank print. How indeed.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Anne, Anne, Anne, Charles, Anne, did I mention Anne? And what about Charles?

Whether or not they end up sexually active together as Anne goes on her lesbian adventures, I still absolutely see her and Jack being romantically in love and like, they’re so???? good????? Jack loves her SO. MUCH. okay. 

Like how much Jack loves Anne is his ONE consistently redeeming quality in my eyes because not only does he love her but he respects her and her wishes and what she wants is more important than what he might prefer. And I just think that’s VERY sexy of him.

And like, fuck you Jack.

This is my no brain head empty love, Charles and Jack the two idiots who traded their one half of a shared braincell for homoromanticism. Again, they just love and support each other and even when Jack fucks up, or Charles fucks up, like, Jack would. Jack has. 

I am very soft for two garbage men stink brains. Also this means that Charles can get away from Eleanor and like can I get a halle-fucking-lujah.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Goodness.. Max? Featherstone?? Like Featherstone and Jack’s relationship is just...the perfect buddy cop balancing act and I am consistently in awe of how easily Max just one ups him consistently like for a character who’s built his entire identity on word play 

My unpopular opinion about this character

(This contains finale spoilers)

Jack Rackham is the original colonial sell-out because he frames the victory over Rogers as more important than any actual meaningful victory for the other parties involved in the war(the Maroons, especially).

He is quite happy to return Nassau to colonial rule, instate the treaty Woodes Rogers himself created, and basically let himself and Max become exactly what Woodes Rogers intended, if it means that he personally wins. I’ve written about this before and in greater detail in a post about Rogers himself, but Jack putting a personal victory over the actual war effort is always very personally irking to me. (And yeah, I also recognize it was never truly a war he signed up for, his money basically got stolen and appropriated by Charles for the war effort, it was never a fight he was truly gonna be interested in, all that Jazz. I still don’t like it, lmao.)

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

CHARLES VANE x JACK RACKHAM KISS WHEN

Also kind of wish he hadn’t done the whole finale thing hadn’t happened, but honestly I do love 85% of Jack’s character and arc and growth during the series.

ASK ME ABOUT MY OPINIONS

[plush-anon]

SCOOB! Stream of Consciousness Review

Here we are folks - I finally review the originally cinematic, fully CGI animated Scooby Doo Movie (one year later... I did not queue this as I thought I had last June - damn you, Tumblr. I’m not changing much here, so enjoy as it was intended).

Created by a team who have professed their affection for this mystery team and their meddling dog too, will this be a lush experience fit to satisfy any Hanna-Barbera fan? Or will it be a hot garbage cash-grab, littered with Easter eggs and references that do nothing to hide a meatless mess of outdated memes and shallow character development?

LET’S

FIND

OUT

Below this cut is my entire stream-of-consciousness review on the SCOOB! Movie, as experienced. SPOILER warning here - I’m digging into everything, no plot points spared. 

Here we go~

And we start off with a decent shot of the California coastline (looks like the kids backstory is front and center), some 90s hip-hop synthwave song about California, and OH SWEET JESUS THESE MODELS LOOK TERRIBLE

Ahem

Yeah, this is a problem right off the bat - some of these people in the opening shots look remarkably unfinished - think three shades above “Rapsittie Kids: Believe in Santa” level - and the animation on them is less than stellar. 

On the plus side, we do see a fantastic variety of ages, sizes, and races - there’s a brief blink-and-you’ll-miss-it Sikh man on roller skates playing a sitar - but when the designs look rushed in the opening shots, it’s not a fantastic sign. At least they’re brief, but it’s hard to see if this is a lower level of the film’s style due to rushed animation, or if they didn’t care to polish it up as much, given that it’s maybe a 30 second scene. 

Still, kudos to actually going for variety in the crowd shots. Minus kudos to making most of the clothes look like Play-doh draped over a Barbie doll. I’m not even kidding on that one, the clothes are super basic and barely have any sign of texture or creasing or even fabric/cut variety. Almost reminds me of the first Toy Story movie’s design for human clothes, yeesh. 

----

Ahh, our first introduction to Scooby Doo at a Greek gyro food stand. That’s foreshadowing right there folks! 😉

Sadly, he is really weirdly animated in his run sequence - he looks out of proportion as he’s running on his hind legs, and the human animation has really bad consistency - some background characters are really janky, while others actually move really nicely. The characters we immediately focus on seem to be pretty smooth at least, but that’s still very strange.

On a side note: Ruby and Spears Sub Sandwich shop. Nice 😁

----

They are reaaaally pushing the super over-the-top dramatic music for a bike cop chasing a dog that stole gyro meat

Why

It’s not even interesting chase music, just generic super-hyped-up chase music

----

And now we finally get to see a young Shaggy, standing next to a tie-dye food stand called Casey’s Confections that… sells meat. Hm. Guess WB hasn’t learned after all these years 🙄

Unfortunately, I’m not a huge fan of the kid they got to play him, Iain Armitage. He’s not a bad voice actor by any means, but he just doesn’t sound right for Shaggy. I know that as a kid he’d be much less likely to have a cracking/squeaky voice, but he sounds… it’s hard to pin down a word, but - precocious? Darling? Either way it doesn’t quite match, especially given how Shaggy sounds when he grows up via Will Forte. Just… no connection there. 

I tie it down to the particular vocal twangs and nuances the gang usually has. I’ll touch base on that note later I think, once we hit the teenage versions of the gang, but for now I’m just not feeling it. 

----

On the one hand, I empathize deeply with Shaggy and his Spotify’s unsettling ability to pinpoint his insecurities with song choices, and also deeply enjoy that one small gesture where his fingers kind of shake & tighten around his phone while he takes a deep breath to calm himself- it’s a very nice, subtle sign of frustration

On the other hand we just passed two guys with no nipples and an unerring likeness to a Ken doll in those Barbie movies, so I’m distracted by that now

(between this and Fred’s no-nipples in Happy Halloween SD!, is WB just terrified of giving men nipples in animated movies now? what gives?)

Also distracted by the thrifty lesbians who bought those two shirts that come together to make a heart in the middle, on the store’s 2 for 1 day

happy pride y’all!

---

Finally got context for the two sand piles!

Very, very sad context, but still! Progress!

Basically Shaggy’s practicing talking to people in order to learn how to make friends, since he either has no idea how, or has never had a friend before. So he’s trying to learn the right way to do it since his own attempts have failed

And him talking to these sand piles not only counts as practice, but he’s using them so that his mom thinks he’s spending time with friends like he told her

Ow :)

---

So ketchup leather is apparently a thing that exists

I’m learning so much today!

---

Given that Shaggy has no friends at this stage, but he’s still called Shaggy, I’m kind of wondering if that was a mean nickname that everyone called him, but he was just grateful for the interaction/pretended it was from friends, so he kept it 🤔

Actually, take it back, his mother is calling him that. Family nickname, maybe…?

----

Shaggy has Blue Falcon (classic) and Dynomutt funko pops

noice

---

Oof, you can reaaaaally hear the age in Frank Welker’s Scooby voice. Can we get Scott Innes back? He sounds almost identical to his performance 20+ years ago :/

Also talking waaaay too much - even SDMI Scooby wasn’t this wordy, and he NEVER shut the hell up 

----

Okay wait

So Shaggy met Scooby on Halloween day - then met the rest of the gang hours later?

Huh. And here I was thinking it would have been a few weeks minimum 

Although I have to say there is a lot here to work with, if it paces out how I think it does

Shaggy meets Scooby. Bare hours later, he buys him a collar (instead of his mom? weird) and asks him to stay with him, despite not really knowing him. Then, only a couple hours after that, he finally makes some friends… but only when Scooby is with him. 

Given that it looks like the gang are all around the same age in the same neighborhood, there’s a solid chance that they’ve taken classes together at the same school. If none of them met/knew/made friends with Shaggy then, but only did so AFTER Scooby came into the picture, that might lead to the argument we know about later when they split up; afterwards, S&SD go to the bowling alley, then get abducted by the Blue Falcon, plot continues. This could make it seem like they were only friends with him at the start because he had a dog. 

And the brief scene earlier with the music device shows that he tries to tamp down on his anger/doesn’t really address it - could lead to something more later 

hmmmm 🤔

---

Wait what

These two kid bullies just came out of nowhere, stole Shaggy’s candy… and then started on about how Halloween is only a marketing ploy to get companies to rot your teeth and go to the dentist more, before throwing the bag through a window and telling the two that ‘your blood sugar will thank us for it!’

Are - are these the brainwashed children of a Karen? Is that what I’m seeing?

I mean we could have had a Red Herring cameo, but apparently informing children about candy conspiracy theories is more important :/

----

Daphne: It’s Halloween - no one should go home without their candy

FD&V: *none of them have candy/candy bags*

???????

(Wouldn’t it make more sense if the bullies had stolen their candy too? What the hey man)

----

I do find it neat that we actually get to SEE the wires the ‘ghost’ uses to fly in full effect - that’s actually pretty cool, and not really something we get to see up close in older Scooby shows. Most of those just have the bad guy randomly flying about, and the wires revealed after the fact 

---

Actually, given how FD&V react to this ghost almost immediately… have they already been solving mysteries? It seems like it, given how smoothly they move together to capture him

That’s kind of odd in kids. Like, even in PNSD they weren’t perfectly in-sync on stuff

This then leads to the gang solving mysteries together… in spite of the fact that all Shag and Scoob did was hide in the wardrobe that had the stolen goods, while FD&V captured the dude 

Granted, they do ask Shag and Scoob if they wanna join in and say yes, but that seems like an strange jump after what could have been a one-time deal

I just find that a touch odd - esp when they could have had a five minute scene or so of them wandering around the house, touching on some old SDWAY traits. Heck, show that they’re SCARED in some way, and don’t immediately move to tackle what looks like a murderous spirit at age 8-9 or so. Even just showing the kids learning about each other would be enough, but what do I know. I’ve only watched Scooby Doo everything since I was 4 🙄

---

Ahhhh, and now for the updated rendition of the theme song

Where they’re all still kids doing everything the teenage gang did in the theme song

It doesn’t look as good as the OG, though - kind of like a computer game simulating the SDWAY intro using the PNSD kids in CGI. It’s honestly strange to see, and a little jarring - especially when we then transition to the older teenage gang right in the middle

Like, we don’t get to see you guys age through the song as you’re chased by/catch different monsters? That could have been pretty neat honestly - shows how long they’ve been doing this

Tho I gotta admit, seeing the Spooky Space Kook with his OG sound effects is pretty awesome, brief as it waoH MY GOD FRED WHY ARE YOU HAVING A ROMANTIC BEACHSIDE DATE WITH THE MYSTERY MACHINE 

THAT WASN’T IN THE ORIGINAL AND NO ONE ELSE GETS A CHARACTER INSIGHT SHOT LIKE THIS

WHY

----

Huh, looks like Ruby & Spears gave up their subway sandwich shop for a coffee shop

That apparently the gang goes to in order to eat malt shop food

okay?

----

Ah, and here’s where we finally look at the voice acting of the older teenage gang. Buckle up folks, cause I gotta lot to say

We’ll start with Fred, bc honestly? I think Efron actually fits him pretty dang well. He’s got a different cadence from Welker, true, but as far as an update goes? I think he’s a solid fit. Very much in line with the all-American kid that Fred’s kind of been slated as for the past 50 years or so, but updated more for the modern perspective. I call it solid (and possibly a replacement for whenever Welker decides to retire). 

Next? Oof. Velma is, IMHO, the weakest casting. Velma, no matter her voice actress, has ALWAYS had some form of nasal twang to her voice - that’s part of what makes her Velma to begin with, and helps her stand out. Nicole Jaffe, Pat Stevens, BJ Ward, Christina Lange (PNSD), Mindy Cohn, Kate Micucci, Linda Cardellini -heck, even Haley Kiyoko from ‘The Mystery Begins’ and Sarah Gilman from the ‘Daphne and Velma’ movie understood this! They all had that nasal twang to their voice - differing between actresses, of course, but still recognizable as Velma. Gina Rodriguez though? Honestly, it just sounds like she’s acting it straight. Not bad acting at all, by any means - she just doesn’t sound like Velma, and doesn’t seem to be trying to. (Honestly wondering if she was only hired bc she voices Carmen Sandiego in the reboot cartoon for the lolz fun reference! type connection) 

Daphne is sort of similar in voices, but hers is more of a pitch her voice hits - Heather North, Mary Kay Bergman, and Grey Delisle Griffin all have that pitch they hit naturally when speaking. Amanda Seyfried? Does not - in fact, her voice is actually deeper than I was expecting - but it’s not quite as big a difference as it is for Velma. It fits her character type okay, and she does well with it overall.  

And finally, the most controversial one: Will Forte’s Shaggy. 

I’ll go ahead and say this: he’s not Scott Menville levels of bad Shaggy voice acting. If I were to place him on a list, I’d probably put him around Billy West level - kind of sounds similar via vocal tics (voice cracking, likes and zoinks, etc), but his own voice just overtakes the impression he’s seeking to hit. When I hear him speak, I don’t really hear Shaggy; I just hear Will Forte trying to do an impression of Shaggy. 

In comparison: when Scott Innes took over for Shaggy, it was like Casey Kasem’s, just a touch more of a twang to his voice and just a dash over-the-top - but it was still Shaggy, and you didn’t doubt that for a minute.

Same thing for Lillard, but maybe moreso - he was pretty much the most perfect casting for a live-action Shaggy there could be at the time Scooby Doo (2002) was made. Him taking over for Kasem from there made perfect sense: he was honestly the best cast Mystery Inc member of the live-actions, and a lot more recognizable to the general public as Shaggy than Scott Innes was. He could also do different emotions with Shaggy that not a lot of the other voice actors had the chance to do (mainly bc script), so for future stuff they have that flexibility, if they wanted to play around a little more. 

With any luck Forte will get better over the course of the movie, but honestly the casting could have been so much better with Matt Lillard and Kate Micucci. 

----

Shaggy Rogers, evading taxes since 2020

----

siMON COWELL??!? 

WHAT THE

WHY?!?!?

ALSO HIS CHARACTER DESIGN STYLE IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FROM THE REST OF THE GANG WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON?!!?

IS HE SUPPOSED TO BE THE SD CELEBRITY CAMEO

LIKE

IF YOU WERE GOING TO DO A CAMEO FROM AMERICAN IDOL WHY NOT RYAN SEACREST 

HE TOOK OVER FOR CASEY KASEM ON THE AMERICAN TOP 40 WOULDN’T THAT MAKE MORE SENSE

aaauuuggghhh

---

Also he’s there as a potential investor in Mystery Inc as a detective agency

A music industry professional… is interested in funding a detective agency.

Like… did he miss out on Josie & the Pussycats? Is that why he’s here?

----

Wait a minute

Oh noooooo

I know why he’s here

I remember this spoiler

Shit

-----

And once again, here is your reminder to tell Simon Cowell a great big fcuk you

Only this time it’s for making Shaggy and Scooby feel worthless and saying that friendship is worthless and cannot be counted on for anything worthwhile

Simon Cowell: Professional Dickhead

---

Welp, at least this gives a solid reason why they leave: Simon Cowell was being a professional dickhead, and the gang didn’t really say anything against him or interrupt him on his whole ‘Shag and Scoob are worthless spiel’

Or, well... Daphne stepped up some, but more to say ‘they’re our friends!’ rather than ‘that’s entirely wrong, our friends aren’t worthless!’ Better than nothing, but yeesh

----

Ahhh, Takamoto Bowling - the emptiest bowling alley in the evenings this side of Coolsville 

(no seriously, the past few times my dad has taken my sister and me bowling pre-pandemic, no matter the day or time? it’s ALWAYS got more than 6 lanes of people there, what the heck)

Also Scooby wears three bowling shoes, which honestly makes more sense than I thought it would - that pup goes spinning and sliding every which way on a normal floor, bowling alley floors would be like ten times worse

----

here’s a nice little detail - when Scooby sees one of the bowling pins peek out with red eyes and he yells that to Shaggy, Shaggy actually squints and walks closer to see if it actually does have eyes

aww

----

Huh, okay 

Panicked Will Forte Shaggy actually sounds more like a good Shaggy voice than normal talking Will Forte Shaggy

I can dig it

---

Still kind of underwhelmed by the Shag and Scoob disguise scene - wouldn’t it make more sense to have them like, dish up hot sauce or something on a plate that nonsensically makes the robots overheat before they discover their ruse?

Idk, maybe they’re off their game after Simon ‘Dickhead’ Cowell

---

Carlton Way - must be named after Fred’s only other voice actor, Carlton Stevens of PNSD

Also Hanna’s Barber Shop is next to Barbera’s Pizza! Cute.

And… Pitstop’s Pink Perfume ad. Wait, who is that? *assorted googling noises*

...ahhh, Penelope Pitstop from Wacky Races! Who, according to Wikipedia, was revealed to have Greek ancestry in the 2016 Wacky Raceland comic book, having been born on the island of Aegina

Now I’m wondering if we’ll see her in this too, given Cerberus...

----

Honestly kind of fascinating to see the gang with a police radio in their van

Also fascinating to see that only main characters are allowed clothing variety and texture/creases/folds

---

it’s actually really sweet to see Fred, upon hearing that Shag and Scoob are likely in danger, immediately makes a 90 degree turn in traffic

---

It looks like they changes Dee Dee’s name a hair - now it’s Dee Dee Skyes, instead of Sykes

It works well for the Falcon aesthetic, so that’s cool

----

Shaggy, after Dee Dee tells them that Dastardly’s trying to kill them: Scoob, someone thinks we’re important enough to *mimes slitting throat*!

Scooby: It’s nice to be wanted.

Excellent! This movie has captured Shag and Scoob’s blasé attitude towards death! Now we’re onto a solid Scooby film :D

Dee Dee: Hmm, I hear that!

And they even have a friend to share in their attitude! Splendid!

----

Christ, I can work photoshop better than Blue Falcon can, and I don’t even know how to use photoshop

I will give major kudos on his costume tho - it maintains the important elements of the OG Falcon, while still updating it with more bird-related aesthetic, like the feathered appearance of parts of his costume, the split cape resembling the tail feathers, and the talon gauntlets & boots. neat!

---

Yooo, Dynomutt, I thought secret identities were still a thing with Superheroes, what the hey are you doing giving it out to a duo you literally just picked up behind a bowling alley

Ngl, I’m kinda hoping we get some scenes where Dynomutt messes up a little like in the OG cartoon - this one feels really serious, which is kind of strange

---

Okay now I want to see older!Blue Falcon come in for a cameo

Mainly bc I’m getting the feeling that this one is a major dumbass, and not in the fun and friendly himbo kind of way 😑

---

Wait, THAT’S our first look at Dastardly? That’s a bit abrupt, isn’t it?

Also his ship must be pumping thousands of gallons of toxins into the air, that smoke cloud looks hideous. Forget logging into his mom’s Netflix account like the trailer said, EPA should probably be hunting him for sport with a laser cannon, jesus fcuking christ

---

Honestly kinda want a plane you can pilot like a motorbike now

---

Welp, it looks like we have a fun, mustache-twirly, puns-aplenty, loves-to-be-bad kind of villain on our hands folks! This is gonna be FUN AS HECK

---

Eurgh, this scene - the super-stiff-but-stretched-out ‘yeeurgh’ faces really squick me for some reason, but I can’t really pinpoint why

---

I have decided I highly dislike the Brian Blue Falcon, or Brian Falcon for short, and would like to see Dastardly tie him to some railroad tracks

---

North St for Heather North, and… wait… Funland Carnival? Like where Charlie the Robot hung out?

Apparently that’s in Romania.

A very yellow-greenfilter Romania at that.

 Like, I’ve seen blue washes on movies trying to portray evening in the middle of the day so they don’t actually have to shoot at night, but yellow? That’s normally used for deserts and hot days and uhhh 

NOT for evenings in a country with landscape like THIS

odd

(I mean I guess they got the mountains and trees right, but still. Yellow filters make a place look arid, which Romania is Not, to my knowledge)

----

Dude, Brian Falcon is such an idiot even Shaggy and Scooby, commonly portrayed as the idiots of Mystery Inc, look at him like he’s a moron.

(They are Not Amused.)

Also Brian Falcon is an absolute coward. That’s new. Even Shaggy and Scooby face off against the robots directly in a Whack-a-Mole game and destroy some. Dude, get your head in the fcuking game already, yikes

--

Woah, Laff-a-Lympics, Wacky Races, Hex Girls, The Banana Splits, Penelope Pitstop, Space Stars, Posse Impossible, and Hong Kong Phooey easter eggs in one shot

Geezus

--- 

Another nice moment: when cornered by Dastardly, Shaggy moves to stand in front of Scooby to protect him

---

Dastardly (to Shaggy): I don’t care about YOU. You’re not REMOTELY important!

*proceeds to shoot Shaggy THROUGH the ceiling and up into the highest car on a Ferris Wheel where Brian Falcon is hiding like a man baby*

Welp, so much for a fun and zany villain. Time for this Plush Anon to kill a bitch *cocks shotgun*

I will, too - kudos to the animators for hurting me so badly with the face Shaggy made right before being shot because

OW

---

Ehehehhehe, yess, the infamous ‘Dick’ scene

Dastardly: No, I’m a DICK. With a D!

You sure are, you sack of dildos with a D!

This scene had to be put in on purpose - if this had been released in theaters, I just know the adults would be dying in laughter 🤣🤣🤣

----

Shaggy: Brian, do something! 

Brian Falcon: Like what?

Shaggy: Like, drop some F-Bombs!

love it 😂

---

Is it like movie law now, that if there’s an action scene with a Ferris Wheel in the background, it has to fall off and roll down a mild incline like a wheel? Because it kinda feels like it

---

Aha! Dastardly said his drats! Perfection.

Now to shoot him through a ceiling to make them matter even more :D

---

OOF. 

Well that hurt. 

Poor Shaggy - basically internalizing now that he’s the worthless one and weak link of the group now that Scooby is considered more important

---

Holy fcuk I’m crying

Shaggy just broke Brian Falcon down to his deepest insecurities without even trying while talking to him

He even used the words ‘imposter syndrome’ 

Shaggy hon, you’re the best

----

Oh hey, Fred, Daphne, and Velma! It’s been a while since we saw you guys again, what are you doing?

Arguing about the metric system and realizing that Shaggy and Scooby reminding them to eat periodically helped them keep a clearer head...

And using the word ‘hangry’.

But then looking through a ridiculously cute photo album of the two and a video the gang took together (the video is honestly really heckin’ cute, 10000/10 would recommend)...

And then getting pulled over so Fred can have a brief ‘oo-la-la’ montage about the pretty blonde cop who honest-to-gods looks like a Barbie doll.

Where Daphne then describes how ugly Dastardly is...

Right before the petite blonde cop who’s maybe like 5’7” at best rips off her outfit to reveal it was Dick Dastardly this entire time, all 7ish feet of him.

And then kidnaps them all along with the Mystery Machine while he makes terribly fun dorky puns

…

...SO BACK TO SCOOBY AND SHAGGY...

---

...where Scooby is making kissy faces in the mirror while wearing his Blue Falcon uniform

Hrm, that’s not really better is it

We actually see Shaggy reading (OG) Blue Falcon’s autobiography, and making hurt but snide comments about Scooby’s ego

Which are actually pretty clever tbh

-----

Cooooooongratulations, Fred Jones! You are now officially a full-on himbo!

----

Alas, poor Daphne. While your knowledge of the tropes of your show might have served you well in other places, this was to be a theatrical release once upon a time, and so such knowledge falls to ruin.

----

You know, I just realized - we’re never really told HOW the Cerberus skulls work, both in how each skull can be used to find the others,  and, presumably, in releasing Cerberus itself. We’re given a brief glance-over of Scooby’s ancestry (and I mean REALLY damn brief), and a quick mention that these are supposed to be Cerberus’ skulls being stolen, but… that’s it. Nothing else is given. 

Now, I read the first few chapters of my SCOOB! Junior Novelization, and it actually went into further detail about the skulls themselves and what Dastardly’s initial plan was early in the book - open the gates of Hades and obtain the seas of treasure therein. It acted as an introduction both to the climatic endgame we’ll face at the end of the movie, and to Dastardly, who uses the same disguise trick he used as the Barbie cop when he stole the first one in South America. 

(They actually DID plan to use this as Dastardly’s intro, but cut this… 3 minute scene for time. Yeah. See below video for the details - honestly think they should have kept it in. Saves time later and definitely more show than tell, compared to what we got)

I feel like that would be a better introduction to him than the one we got - hell, it would have fit in quite neatly after the revamped theme song montage. They could have the scene with Dastardly finding/stealing the first skull as an introduction (as above), then have him answer a call or something. Exposit openly “You found the key! Excellent! Now where are we going next?” 

THEN cut to the diner/coffee shop scene we had earlier. We still wouldn’t know exactly what the key was/entailed off the bat, and they could still have FD&V find out on their own - maybe by hacking the little robot instead? IDK.

---

The final skull is on Messick Mountain.

Cute.

On a side note, I do love how Dastardly’s ship interior looks - very dieselpunk

---

Velma just hacked into Dynomutt… somehow, and I finally get my wacky Dynomutt shenanigans!  Hazoo!

...sadly that was really dang brief. Realistic, yes, but still too brief. 

---

Eyyyy, we finally get the whys of why Scooby is needed! … really dang fast. 

Also Fred says Jinkies. 

----

Hey, Muttley popped up! In a shrine… to his demise… that we find out he reached when Dastardly pushed him forward into the Underworld to steal the treasure of Alexander the Great in a portal he rigged up… only for both of them to find out it was a one-way deal unless they used the key to be able to come back. The key, of course, being Scooby Doo, descendent of Peritas, Alexander’s dog. 

Eh, workable enough-ish. It’s interesting to see that Dastardly, despite how much he disliked Muttley in the older cartoons, still cares about him to a certain extent. 

---

Pfff, Fred’s a poor man’s Hemsworth XD

---

Sweet, we’re in ‘Journey to the Center of the Earth’ now!

---

Um

O W W W

You guys really had to do the ‘me or them’ thing with Shaggy and Scooby… and tHeN hAvE sCoObY cHoOsE tHe FaLcONs?!? Just because they said he was important as “the key” and gave him a spandex costume.

Over at least 7 years of friendship. 

Booooooooooooo

---

actually no I’m Not Done Yet

This whole scene is a mess.

Like

Shaggy’s turn was really dang fast… but I can still see how he gets to it. It’s at least a day between Scooby being chosen as a pseudo-sidekick and the island arrival, during which Shaggy’s talk with the main adult (who has taken up the mantle of his favorite superhero) essentially confirms his feelings of worthlessness and leaves him to stew for HOURS on end (on top of another adult, Dastardly, who also calls him “not even REMOTELY important” at the carnival before freaKING SHOOTING HIM THROUGH THE CEILING NO I AM NOT OVER THIS). Tie that to a teenager who also believes his only friends have come to think he’s meaningless baggage, and suddenly his entire support system is vanishing underneath him to one of his former idols without ANY sign of hesitation from Scooby’s part (with the exception of the collar scene, but I don’t think that that means the same to Scooby, given how quickly he bounces back)

Scooby tho… hrm. It could be that he’s clinging to the good feelings Brian Falcon inspires in him (by choosing him as the next possible Dynomutt), as a way to overpower how FD&V hurt him, while also building on how he came to love the duo because SHAGGY loved them so much. But the movie doesn’t frame that up… at all?? At least compared to Shaggy. 

Idk, maybe I’m missing something, but this scene is a mess through and through

Boooooo

----

Scooby: *tries to leap into Brian Falcon’s arms like he did with Shaggy but falls*

Brian: Uh, what are you doing?

Scooby: Rhaggy never missed. 

Damn straight he didn’t

---

oh hey, it’s Captain Caveman

I was wondering when we’d see him.

---

AAAUUGGHH

It’s that blink-and-you’ll-miss-it scene from the trailers I sobbed over - the one with Shaggy holding Scooby’s collar

Fun fact it actuALLY FADES INTO THE FLASHBACK

THAT WAS NOT A TRAILER THING THAT’S ACTUALLY HERE IN THE MOVIE

OW

---

Oh No

Fred is here, alone, after that whole scene with Dastardly saying he had a use for Fred

...while that’s likely Dastardly in a Fred suit (that sounds creepy just typing it), I’m still going to enjoy this brief but absolutely lovely hug Shaggy and Fred share...

(seriously tho, look at this, it’s a genuinely close, squish-your-lungs-out kind of hug, I love it)

...as well as Shaggy, who's still hurt from his fight with Scooby, immediately gearing up to go help him after hearing Dastardly’s trying to kidnap him.

----

Brian Falcon and Scooby Doo now have to take on Captain Caveman in gladiatorial combat in order to claim the final skull of Cerberus

I love cartoons sometimes

----

Captain Caveman just put the smackdown on Brian Falcon and punched him into the ground up to his CHEST

Then smacked him so far into a wall he cracked the stone around him!

GodDAMN is this satisfying 😆 altho minor question here: how did he gain the rank of Captain? Do cavepeople have a naval force?

---

He just whirled Scooby around his head, then spun him so fast his costume broke off

I may have to look into some Captain Caveman stuff now, that’s fantastic

---

Shaggy and Fred - sorry, “Fred” -  just smashed through to the colosseum in the Mystery Machine

And Dynomutt just fired missiles at Captain Caveman to smash him into an Amigara-shaped hole of himself

I REALLY love cartoons sometimes

---

Oh No

Just as Shaggy starts trying to apologize, “Fred” kicks him in the back, rips off his disguise to normal Dastardly self, and kidnaps Scooby atop the skull, before revealing he destroyed the Falcon Fury jet

New tagline for this movie? Shaggy Rogers and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day

...at least the rest of the gang is back together?

---

Brian Falcon: *Immediately tries to blame Shaggy for inadvertently leading Dastardly to them, while storming up to get in his face*

Fred: *upon realizing BrianF is blaming Shaggy for everything, without a SINGLE moment’s hesitation, immediately leaps in to defend Shaggy and physically push back Brian Falcon several feet*

We stan one Himbo, theydies and gentlethem

Also?

Velma (sneering): What kind of hero blames other people for his problems? *Walks over to comfort Shaggy with Daphne, while Shaggy looks dumbfounded they’re defending him bc he also blames himself for Scooby’s kidnapping*

This. This right here, is the kind of Mystery gang content I wanna see.

I don’t care how the rest of this movie goes now, this scene right here is ambrosia to the Scooby fan’s soul, and therefore makes this entire movie worth it, outdated memes, lingo, and all

---

Cackling rn - Fred and Brian Falcon are in a point-off a la the Spiderman meme 😂

or, more specifically, the post-credits sequence of Spiderverse where they’re arguing about who started pointing first

It gets better when Velma and Daphne try to pull each other off of their pushing fight, and Velma grumbles “Toxic Masculinity” I’m crying

---

WOAH

More super Shaggy stuff here (apart from being flung through a building roof without a scratch) - he pushes apart both groups effortless, and even knocks them back several feet

If we estimate Dynomutt as… we’ll say 450 since he’s made of metal, Falcon at 220, Dee Dee at 160, that’s about 830 lbs on one side

Then Fred, Daphne and Velma on the other (hmm, 180, 150, 130?) would be around 460 lbs

Dang boi

---

Oh honey no, it’s not your fault

But dang if he didn’t get a good message from it, one I’ve done my best to transcribe here:

“I was afraid that... things were gonna change. And they did change. But like, that’s okay! People can grow. But it doesn’t mean that we’re growing apart. Because the one thing that will never change is that Scooby Doo is my best friend! Ten years ago, a little boy made a promise to a stray puppy that he’d never leave him no matter what. And I’m gonna keep that promise! Now it’s time we stopped that mustachioed menace from opening the gates to the {underworld} and letting loose that fearsome {Cerberus}. So what do you say we get out {of here}, and go get my always-snacking, never-lacking, often-napping dog back? Who’s with me?”

Honestly not a bad message for kids. Things will change, people will change, but that doesn’t mean you have to stop being friends. (Obvs real life exceptions apply, but that’s not a bad note honestly)

...shame that that conclusion comes right the FUCK outta nowhere

Like

How, exactly, did he come to this conclusion? WHEN? What inspired him to realize this, what was the impetus for this specific line of thought, that it’s okay for friends to change?

It kinda feels like this should have been either the happy ending speech given after they’ve saved the world, or one at the start of the third act, like if Shaggy arrives when Scooby thinks he’s chased him away and ruined everything, and Shaggy & the gang still save him. And Scooby asks him why he did that - when Scooby tried to change himself to fit what Brian Falcon wanted, instead of treasuring the friend he still had, or maybe why Shaggy reacted the way he did. THEN Shaggy gives the speech we hear, a la:

“I yelled at you because… like, because I was scared. I was scared that... things were gonna change. And they did change. But like, that’s okay! People can grow. But it doesn’t mean that we’re growing apart. Because the one thing that will never change is that YOU’RE my best friend! Ten years ago, a little boy made a promise to a stray puppy that he’d never leave him no matter what. And I mean to keep it!” 

At least that would make a little more sense to me. Again, not a bad speech, but a little rearranging would help to really hit home. 

---

Okay, now we’re back with Dastardly in Greece, and suddenly the background people all look MILES better than the ones at the start of the movie. Did they just forget to polish the first two minutes of film, what the heck?

Also, Dastardly’s ship is literally the entire length of the Greek ruins presented o_O

---

HOLY SHIT THE SKULLS TURNED BACK TIME AND MADE THE RUINS INTO AN ENTIRELY RESTORED PALACE WITH THE GATES OF THE UNDERWORLD BEFORE THEM

They’re also colored a very atmospheric neon arrangement that’s surprisingly quite tasteful ^.^

----

The Mystery Machine can fly now!!! eeheeheeeheeheeheeheeee

----

And so we finally see Cerberus, a massive, towering figure with sharp teeth and pffffffhahahhahaa why are all three heads wearing Spartan helmets

To its credit, they’re also wearing basic body armor, wrist guards, tail spikes, etc, but the helmets are killing me 🤣 who thought to stick that onto the dog? Did Hades forget to remove the armor after winning the Gods’ Pet Costume Contest, or was it like that horse in the ATV costume - it felt safer so it didn’t let anyone take it off?

Or was this a precaution against Herakles coming back? These are questions - hilarious, hilarious questions 😁

---

Awww. Scooby immediately runs to the battered Mystery Machine to rip the doors open for the gang!

And… wait. THIS is where that wonderful hug was in the trailers? I thought that was at the end of the movie when everyone was safe!

This now does not bode well. But we’ll worry about that later. Time to enjoy this gorgeous wonderful hug of the entire gang, and Shag and Scoob apologizing to each other for fighting 🥰

Yet another scene to make the rest of this movie worth the rest

(halfway wanna frame this shit and put it on the wall, it’s that lovely)

----

Fantastic! Dastardly is now in Hell, where I’ve been wishing him this entire movie! :D

And dang… he actually apologizes to what he believes is a dead Muttley. Who is, naturally, snickering at all of this. The two bicker predictably, but eventually hug and make up, too happy to see each other to resort to old habits. Honestly a nice little scene, all-in-all. 

---

Back to the gang and they’re doing the glowy eyes in the dark bit! I actually haven’t seen that in a Scooby movie forever, it’s neat.

Also Fred is now going full Liam Neeson over his van, war paint and all, using the tire cover as a shield and… holy shit. 

HOLY SHIT

THE ASCOT IS BAAAnnnnnd it’s gone. Boy, that was… short. 

Fred just ran full-tilt at Cerberus, screaming like a mad man, before getting flicked away by its big toe, and losing the ascot and makeshift shield. It punched so hard his facepaint came off

It was fun while it lasted y’all

---

Heyyy, Shag and Scoob just came up with the plan, and it’s actually solid! I’m so proud, and so is the rest of the gang! Also willingly going to distract Cerberus while the rest figure out how to close the gate and stuff Cerberus back in

I love my boys 😊

---

Annnnd there goes Brian Falcon like the coward he is

To… call his dad? And admit he isn’t a hero.

Only for Dynomutt to point out Shaggy and Scooby are taking him on and are terrified. 

This then cuts to Shaggy and Scooby running around in a chariot and gladiator wear, running back and forth a la the door gag from Cerberus to the OG SDWAY theme

I think I love this movie

(although they’re hinting at Dynomutt being resentful of OG Blue Falcon essentially abandoning him to his incompetent son, and I really wish it had been touched upon more

that’s actually rather heartbreaking, when you stop to think about it, and there’s a lot that could be done with an additional two minutes of screentime) 

---

Huh, another good message for kids: it’s okay to fail and be scared, so long as you keep going and try to do what’s right.

Two good messages for kids in one movie. Not too shabby, on the whole. 

---

Brian Falcon just flew in and punched the three-headed dog, then jumped into its mouth as it tried to eat Scooby, resisted the MASSIVE JAW STRENGTH, and got them out of there safe and sound

Finally, something heroic!

-- 

I was wondering where Dastardly and Muttley got off to - apparently they’re off to take a money bath.

Aight

---

Shag and Scoob have now convinced the Rotten Robots to turn into bowling balls to knock Cerberus off their feet a la the classic marbles pratfall back into the underworld

That is a sentence I just wrote

----

OH FCUK NO

NO

ABSOLUTELY NOT NO

YOU ARE TELLING US THAT AFTER ALL OF THIS - ALL OF THIS - ONE OF THEM HAS TO STAY IN THE UNDERWORLD TO LOCK THE GATE

THAT OCTOBER LEAKER WAS RIGHT WHAT THE HELL

LITERALLY SO

I mean i know its a kids film specifically Scooby Doo so happy ending but what the literal FUCK

---

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGHHH

SHAGGY NOOOO

“Buddy, back when we were kids, you saved me. Now, it’s my turn.”

and he dOES THIS WHILE HOLDING SCOOBY’S HEAD TENDERLY IN HIS HANDS

AND WHEN EVERYTHING REVERTS IT’S JUST RUBBLE AND RUIN AND SCOOBY’S LEFT SOBBING OPENLY AT NOTHING

AND THE GANG ALL COME TO CLING AT HIM AND CRY OVER THEIR FRIEND WHO THOUGHT HE WAS WORTHLESS MOST OF THE MOVIE AND THOUGH THAT THE GANG THOUGHT THE SAME ABOUT HIM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHH

---

WELP, TIME TO COPE WITH INAPPROPRIATE HUMOR

Shaggy: I yelled at my dog, got him kidnapped, and ended up helping the bad guy to open the gates to Hell. Guess I’ll die. 

Dee Dee: Well actually, this is more Dastardly’s fault because -

Shaggy, yelling as he slams his hand against the lock: GUESS I’LL DIE!!!

----

Ah, so the writers wrote themselves into a corner, and the only way out was a Deus Ex Machina (at least, I think I’m using that term correctly…) 

Because to get Shaggy back, a giant statue of Alexander the Great and Peritas appears out of nowhere - literally, since it definitely wasn’t there before - with an inscription Scooby has to read to get Shaggy back.

This would have been a lot more effective if we’d seen it when Dastardly arrived in Greece - maybe even as the marker for where the gate to the Underworld was. Have Alexander facing one way, and Peritas facing the other. You open the gate on Alexander’s side, and come home on Peritas’ side. Having this unfold into the gate gives it more purpose than “magically appears right the fcuk outta nowehere” and you could have a pun with the “backdoor” escape. Everybody wins!

And if that’s too good for ya, how about a brief lingering shot by it at some point as Dastardly flies into Greece, behind where the gate materializes, or directly across from it on the plaza? Maybe have one of the gang kick it after Shaggy leaves, and say ‘This is all your fault! Why would you make something like this?’

It’d still be a magical contrivance, but at least it would make some fcuking SENSE.

(Granted it DID lead to this hilariously ominous shot, so maybe I shouldn’t complain:)

---

Velma: I finally figured out what you guys are! You’re the heart of Mystery Inc.

Me: YEAH BABY! *flips over table* I’VE BEEN SAYING THAT SHIT FOR YEARS AND NOW, I’M FCUKING VALIDATED AT LAAAAAAAAST!

----

Shaggy: *rips off Dastardly’s face to reveal…*

ALL: SIMON COWELL??!?

Me, choking on food: I’m sorry WHAT?!?!?

Velma: *takes off mask again to reveal*

ALL: DICK DASTARDLY?!?

Dastardly: Drat! No one ever goes for the double unmasking. 

So I was right all along - Simon Cowell truly was a Dick this entire time.

-----

And so we close on the gang unveiling a Mystery Machine paint job on their official detective agency building, Brian Falcon living the good life as the DJ at their party, the Falcon team gifting a sleek new Mystery Machine to the gang (which honestly looks pretty unique - it’s not the classic, but it is something new that isn’t awful, so kudos there), and the gang on their way to another mystery.

So, at the end of the day is this a good Scooby movie? 

Meh? *waves hand in meh motion* But it definitely had its moments. 

This Scooby film is flawed as heck, no doubt about it - the plot has a MAJOR problem with telling instead of showing, some parts feeling out of order or WAY too short, and of course the deus ex machina ending. I honestly would have loved some more time for their first mystery as kids, where we actually got more character moments/bonding from Fred, Daphne, and Velma as they solved it the more traditional route, as well as not framing FD&V as super duper mystery solvers right off the bat??? 

The stuff with Blue Falcon isn’t AWFUL, per se, but it is ridiculously satisfying to see him get smacked around. Captain Caveman was honestly one of the funniest bits in the movie, same with Dynomutt. 

As far as the character stuff? It all felt fairly natural, progression-wise. Shag and Scoob don’t have this big break-up with the gang - they’re hurt by the literal Dickhead’s comments the gang don’t speak up against, and go to blow off some steam together. Shag and Scoob don’t have this giant blow-up argument - it builds over the film into a hurt spat they both recognize they overreacted to almost immediately. The gang (FDV) go looking for them almost as soon as they leave, and, upon hearing they’re in danger, turn and head towards them to save them, realizing how important the two are to Mystery Inc along the way. They defend each other, help each other, have some of the Best Dang Animated Mystery Inc hugs I ever did see - THIS feels more like the Gang I’ve been waiting for forever to come back to DTV (and in a rough sense, did). While I do wish we’d gotten more screen time of FD&V, what we got wasn’t too bad. 

Weirdly enough, at the end of the day, I’ve actually grown more accustomed to Forte’s Shaggy - it feels like it fits this different style a touch more than I originally thought, and holy hell if I didn’t come close to tears at that ending gate scene, he knocked that one out of the park.  Velma still doesn’t feel much like Velma, but I did get used to it by the end. I kept cracking up at Efron’s Fred, and no complaints on Seyfried’s Daphne.

Jason Isaacs as Dick Dastardly absolutely killed it. Blue Falcon Crew was okay (excepting Mark “The Racist” Wahlburg - it was just him talking, no real effort. You could recognize Wahlburg right off the bat, acting as a goofy douche) and freaking Captain Caveman was awesome. Apparently they combined both Billy West and Don Messick’s recordings for Muttley (awesome!!!), so this may very well be Don Messick’s final role in a Scooby Doo film. 

It got off to a rough start, but ended well enough. The animation was solid, the writing has some unexpectedly clever and funny moments sprinkled throughout, with some pretty fun action sequences on the side. Watching this, I really do believe that the people working on it love Scooby Doo and all things Hanna-Barbera… at least in their own way. 

I ended up buying this instead of just renting it ($5 more, why not) and I am honestly glad I did so. Despite its flaws, it has some great moments with the gang as friends, and I have been Craving That Shit for DECADES

And if these writers/directors ever did another Scooby film? I think I’d be up for giving them a chance - at least so long as we got some more absolutely BEAUTIFUL hugs with the gang

I hope you enjoyed this stream-of-consciousness reaction to SCOOB! (2020)... a whole ass year LATER, admittedly (I didn’t switch my Save Post to Queue, curse my hubris), but hopefully y’all’ve been entertained. Good night everybody!

[sonofsallyjackson]

Heroes of Olympus should have been in first-person.

@jo-march-is-a-lesbian​ wrote a really wonderful post about how “Percy Jackson and the Olympians is better than Heroes of Olympus…because it understood simplicity and character development.”  It highlights some reasons I also found HoO less rewarding namely that it was an overcomplicated story with limited character growth, lacked a common thesis, and was super jarring when it switched perspectives.  

And with that my little brain went: I can fix this.  Which frankly is ridiculous.  I can’t come up with a compelling thesis like “The idea that we should place our hope in our loved ones, our friends and our family, and if we do that, we won’t be tempted to give up hope again.”   But I can imagine a simple change that would have solved some of the issues and also played to Rick’s strengths as a writer:  Each book should have been written in first person and narrated by a different character.

With so many people on the quest, I often felt like I was watching a bunch of one-dimensional characters fight for their right to be the main character.  I didn’t know who to focus on but I was also dissatisfied.  There were all these new wonderful characters in front of me who I wanted to love, but I didn’t feel like I actually knew them.  I mean I don’t feel like I know the Stoll Brothers either, but I’m not concerned about that fact because they are side characters.  When everyone is painted as the main character,  I have certain expectations for growth, personality, and voice.  The story would have been better served if the characters took turns narrating the action, allowing us to settle into their perspective, see their growth, and better understand their personality.

Plus Rick kills first-person.  While I’m not particularly a fan of Trials of Apollo, it’s not because I don’t know the characters.  Apollo is so very different than Percy. Their voices, even though they can both be jokesters at times, reflect their different life-experiences, thought processes and provide massive insight into their characters.   If the Seven (and Nico and Reyna) got the same treatment, I would be absolutely giddy.  

I recognize that rewriting the HoO series in first-person is something a talented fanfiction writer with a lot of time on their hands could actually do.  But I am not talented like that and I certainly don’t have the discipline to actually write that much fic, especially if I was trying to keep the events vaguely the same just with different narration and pacing.  So instead I’ve included who I think should have narrated each book below the cut.  I’d love to hear any opinions people have regarding this idea, especially who they would have wanted to see to narrate each book.

In addition to picking the narrator, I’ve highlighted what should be the “quest” so to speak of each story.  Personally, MoA, HoH and BoO are kind of a blur to me despite reading them all recently.  It’s hard to distinguish what happens in each book because it’s all one massive quest with a whole bunch of mini-quests.    While the different narrators would obviously make the books more distinctive, splitting the series into seven books would also help simplify each book’s individual goal.  Eight books would have allowed for better integration of the plot to find the physician’s cure, but with the prophecy of seven, it seemed like seven books was the best option, if I was going to be doing something as blasphemous as splitting books.   

As a note, I ran out of steam as I went so not all opinions are fully fleshed out. 

Book 1:  The Lost Hero The Quest: Rescue Hera/Juno Narrator:  Jason 

Why this would be cool: 

He is literally Juno’s chosen sent on a quest to rescue her.  It’s poetic enough to give him the book.

Jason’s journey is just as much about rediscovering himself as it is about saving Juno.   Of the new characters, I feel like I understand Jason the least. Mainly because I felt like I was missing the entire first half of his story.  Jason, like Percy and Annabeth, is a hero of the Titan War. I know some of his accomplishments, but I don’t have any bearing on what his life was like or how he felt about it.   He doesn’t seem like the type to relish Praetor-ship since he doesn’t have the same intense need to get back to his camp as Percy.  Was he just hoisted on his comrades’ shields after killing the Titan without any real choice in the matter? Give me Jason’s memories coming back slowly over the course of the quest (with potentially a fractured memory of a mistake he made in the Roman’s final Titan battle that makes him doubt their ability to both rescue Piper’s dad and save Hero but he makes the decision to anyway because he can’t just hurt his friend like that.   Let me understand how Jason is the person he is today.  Give me glances of the Roman Camp with emphasis on the heavy expectations that have always followed him as the son of Jupiter and foreshadow why he eventually chooses to design all the shrines for the minor gods so he can have his own place in the world as a figure between the two camps.

Let’s dive into those feelings of anger/guilt/resentment when people at camp are disappointed with him for not being Percy or in Chiron’s case are nervous about what his presence means. 

I want to dig deeper regarding Jason’s feelings about reconnecting with Thalia.  He knows that if the gods hadn’t been determined to keep the two camps completely separate, he could have grown up with his sister. 

What does telling the narrative like this sacrifice:  

We miss some of the internal turmoil regarding the fact that Piper’s Dad has been captured and she must betray her friends. 

We also don’t feel the tensions of Piper’s relationship with Aphrodite. I don’t see Piper bringing up the conversation with her mom saying that her mist memories were so strong because she automatically sensed the potential of a romantic relationship with Jason.  

We don’t have any of Leo’s conflicted feelings regarding rescuing Hera or his fear of being made an outcast for his fire abilities.  Jason has to go with Leo to discover Bunker 9 and Festus.  

Leo doesn’t actively save the day with the Cyclops. 

We don’t know how Piper feels about her charm-speak or see her defeat Madea (as the boys are in their weird trance thing). 

Knowledge about Gaea’s involvement in wrecking Leo’s life will come later.  

Book 2: The Son of Neptune The Quest: Free Thantos Narrator:  Hazel

Why this would be cool: 

The stakes are so incredibly high. Hazel is literally risking her second chance at life by agreeing to go on this chance.  She’s going to the place she died to fight the monster she created. She also has to deal with the trauma of knowing she may have bought the world time with her first sacrifice but it now means nothing if she can’t succeed again.  

We get to see Camp Jupiter from the view of someone who loves it but doesn’t really fit in.  Hazel joined Camp Jupiter just after the final battle.  She enters a community that has learned to fight as a well-oiled machine but that has lost people.  Dakota or the others may remark to her about how things were before or the people who are missing.  Hazel sees a community that she’s not quite a part of both because she didn’t fight in the war and because she’s in the fifth cohort with a feared godly parent.

It would explore her relationship with Nico more (because I love their dynamic and I want more).   She knows she can’t replace his real sister, but she feels comfortable and happy at the opportunity to have a brother, especially one who is out of time like she is.   

What does telling the narrative like this sacrifice:  

Frankly, the largest pushback would be from the fans who expected this to be Percy’s book since we just watched Jason rediscover who he is.

Percy’s phone call to his mom doesn’t have the same intensity.  

Frank’s relationship with Mars and how desperate he was to be claimed but now he doesn’t think he can live up to his father’s expectations.  

Frank and his grandmother.  We aren’t in Frank’s head as he changes shape till later.  

Book 3: Mark of Athena The Quest: Close the Divide Between The Two Camps by finding Athena’s statue and Rescue Nico Narrator(s):  Annabeth and Leo

Why Annabeth: 

So I can have all the emotions at the reunion with Percy.  

Annabeth’s relationship with her Mom has never been great, but imagine beginning the book with Annabeth being given the Mark of Athena. They haven’t left for New Rome yet and her nerves are already all over the place.  Then Athena/Minerva comes, gives her an impossible quest, and breaks her hat.   Annabeth wants to prove to her mother that she’s worthy because despite everything she still values her mother’s opinions.  Also her fatal flaw of hubris makes her believe she will succeed where everyone else failed.

Much of the book already follows her in third person limited so we just get things with a little extra emotion.  

Why Leo:  

Leo has to grapple with the fact he started this war by being the one to fire the cannon even if he didn’t have any control.  He is motivated to fix it

If we’re going to include the Sammy plot, we need to do it now.   Leo doesn’t like being the odd one out on the ship but he certainly doesn’t like the feeling of being notable because of his grandfather.  

We still need to get into those feelings of abandonment and anger at Gaea for killing his mom.  

Nemesis 

Leo comes into his own with the discovery of the Archimedes sphere and the decision to value people over objects.  

What does telling the narrative like this sacrifice:

The aquarium shenanigans 

The fight between Jason and Percy in Kansas needs to happen differently so that the others are present and try to stop it.  

Neither of them went ashore to meet Hercules.  

I think we might need to move up the Calypso meeting to this book, but that also kills some of the suspense since Frank will have the fireproof coating prior to his adventures in Venice when he gains faith in his abilities.  It also might mean Leo opens the fortune cookie from Nemesis unless for some odd reason he doesn’t have it.  There’s a lot more narrative weight for it coming later, but in order to get in as many book events as we can in, it might need to come earlier. 

Book 4:  House of Hades Pt. 1

The Quest: Survive Tartarus Narrator(s): Annabeth and Percy

The first time I read House of Hades, I read it out of order (reading all the Percy and Annabeth chapters until they were on the elevator out of Tartarus before going back and reading the others), because I couldn’t handle the back and forth.  I felt like the tension would build, I’d be invested in this plot and then we’d switch to the other plot. Plus I was very concerned for my children.  So I feel fully justified in saying that there is more than enough material to give the two of them their own book.

I just feel like all the feelings would be magnified.  

Percy’s commentary slowly losing its humor because he can’t anymore.

Annabeth’s guilt at having pulled him in being extra loud.  

Downsides beyond adding an entire book: Just imagine all the outrage at two cliffhangers in a row, because you know the book would end with them in the elevator remembering Bob’s words about the stars.   

Book 5:  House of Hades Pt. 2

The Quest:  Close the Doors of Death Narrator(s): Frank and Hazel

Frank and Hazel experience the most growth on the quest to close the doors so this book is all theirs.  Hazel learns to control the mist.  Frank experiments with his transformations.  I want nothing but them growing into themselves and their abilities.  

The good thing about turning the two warring storylines from House of Hades into separate books is that we lose very little plot.  

Book 6:  House of Hades Pt. 3/Blood of Olympus Pt 1 (Personally I would call this one Ambassador of Pluto)

The Quest:  Unite the Gods’ Personalities. Narrator: Nico

To clarify what I mean by HoH 3, I just mean anything done with the intention of trying to cross paths with Reyna, including the adventure with Cupid, in addition to the existing Nico&Reyna plotline in BoO.  

Nico dealing with all the emotions and his most recent near-death experience.

He kept the secret of the camps so the world wouldn’t end in chaos, but now that the world is in chaos he will be the one to fix it.  

In the short time he’s on the Argo 2, Nico realizes that even though this wasn’t his quest; this is his family and he needs to protect them.  

The reader has a pretty good idea Nico is gay, even if the word isn’t explicitly said from the descriptions (his guilty Percy thoughts - he let down the man he loves even if he won’t admit it.) This means that Cupid’s forceful outing is potentially less surprising so the reader can be properly outraged at Cupid.  

Downside: Reyna definitely has adventures when Nico is passed out, especially the whole waking up with the Hunters, but I think it’s excusable for a whole book from Nico’s perspective.  

Also, the battle between the camps and gifting of the statue needs to happen in this book, but we shouldn’t find out if the gods have regained control of their forms yet.  We alleviate some tensions because Camp Half-blood is likely to be overrun with Octavian’s monsters instead of the Roman armies and Gaea could awaken any second, but there’s an odd moment of calm and an uneasy truce.  (Octavian is potentially taken under custody to be held for trial only to escape in the next book.) 

Book 7:  Blood of Olympus Pt 2 (and the aftermath)

The Quest:  Like The Last Olympian, the final book’s focus is entirely on defeating the series’ big bad, in this case, Gaea.  Leo’s quest for the Physician’s cure parallels Percy’s River Styx visit.  

Narrator(s):  Leo and Piper

Leo has his death hanging over his head.  He has decided that he will be the one to die not any of his friends.  He got the cloth from Calypso so the “fire” portion of the prophecy applies to him and not Frank.  (Yes I know you can’t control prophecies, but do you think that’s going to stop Leo.)  

It’s the ultimate revenge for killing his mom.  We can have memories of both the happy times with Esperanza and the fear he felt for thinking he caused the fire. 

Piper’s perspective is necessary as we need to be with her during the fight with the giants.   

This series began with Piper, Leo, and Jason.  It ends that way too with the three of them killing Gaea and the two of them narrating.  

Downsides: 

The Percabeth I love you-the feud is over scene remains in Piper’s perspective.  

Since we’re not following Reyna’s delivery of the statue concurrently we don’t know when to anticipate the healed gods appearing in the battle with the giants.  

The book can still get away with not showing us Percy’s reunion with Sally or forcing Leo to tell the others he’s alive so they’re all grieving. 

[phantaloon-books]

I finally read The Tyrant's Tomb and boi I loved this one so much, so here's some my opinion on it (they're not in chronological order)

warning, this is long af and sorry for cursing a bit, I can't help it

Apollo's character arc is lowkey one of the best Rick has written, I'm sorry if you don't agree, but he's gone from wanting others to solve his problems and relying on the halfbloods to intentionally avoiding others doing things for him, volunteering for the quests and saying it should be him that faces the terrible stuff so that demigods and other creatures don't suffer

something really interesting is how his perception of himself has changed, and it's almost worrying how genuinely self depreciating his inner dialogue is, because he no longer sees himself as mighty Apollo, he sees himself as worthless and useless Lester, and his narration is highkey depressing

Also, Apollo disliking and being somewhat disgusted of the god he used to be, realizing the horrible things he had done and how horrible he was and that he looked worse as the former Apollo than as Lester, regretting things he'd done, that's top tier development

(I'm sorry but I love the entire scene with the ravens, the part where he just screams "I'm sorry" it feels as if he isn't just apologizing to the ravens, but to everyone who's been affected by what he's done as a selfish god)

Reyna so openly turning down and laughing at Apollo for suggesting they be together is my favorite thing ever lmao I couldn't stop laughing, like she knew what gods can do if you turn them down (even if it was just mortal Lester) and she didn't give a damn, it was so fucking funny

people say Rick only includes diversity for the sake of including it and to gain popularity, but I still enjoy the fact that he does, because as a teacher he must have had all kinds of students of all religions, colors and sexualities, he includes diversity because he's seen diversity. anyway my point is I love that we have Lavinia, a Jewish lesbian from a Russian family, and she's not ashamed of being any of them

I'm sorry I just love Apollo so much, I've grown to respect him so much, and even if Hermes once said them gods often forget their oaths and promises, I have a feeling Apollo won't ever forget Jason's request that he never forgets what's it like to be mortal

Frank still admiring Apollo despite everything, and despite the fact that he looks like a messed up teen makes me go all uwu

Frank being portrayed as this clumsy and awkward kid but also this powerful and brave leader is my favorite thing ever because I think Frank is underrated and I dare to say that he's one of the strongest demigods we've ever met, even stronger than some of the nig three children

the whole thing about the undead army is honestly so creepy, especially when we see it from Apollo's perspective cause se him slowly succumb to the venom's effect, and that part in Tarquin's tomb where he "calls Lester to be part of his undead" was genuinely disturbing, at least to me

some books in the past have touched the part of the nature spirits not being given enough attention, but I really enjoyed how Apollo comes to realize that he only worries about demigods and gods when all lives are worth the same - mortals, halfbloods, nature spirits, gods, and even monsters

again, I love Apollo's arc, it's just AHH he's becoming so caring of life it just makes me happy

Reyna choosing herself to make herself happy is everything, and inspiring to every single woman who is told by others that they need someone to be happy, I just love it, because self love is the most important love of all

I haven't said anything about it, but man I love Meg and Apollo's friendship, they just care so much for each other, Meg who's so scared of losing her loved ones and Apollo who's so scared of not being able to be loved or to love, but they still love each other, and I'm glad it's not romantic, because yes fraternal love is also what people need, and their friendship is what they need

aurum and argentum being cute doggos rather than the steely (no pun intended) and cold dogs we met in HoO warms my heart. I don't understand why they're so cute and adorable, or maybe that's just how Apollo sees them, but they seem to act like actual dogs in this book

the fact that Reyna never confirmed nor denied being attracted to Thalia just makes me all hyped up, like we love Theyna

Apollo just gives off Eddie Brock vibes throughout the entire book and that's hilarious asf. ever since the start he's said to look like shit, feel like shit and be injured with deathly poison that will turn him to a zombie. if that isn't Venom vibes I don't know what is

I've said it once and I'll say it again, Frank Zhang is one of the strongest demigods Rick has ever introduced in a series, and him facing two immoral and godly in power emperors, burning one to death with his own life fire and injuring the other enough for Apollo to do the final kill is top tier

"If I'm going to burn, I might as well burn bright. This is for Jason." bitch actual goosebumps

We've seen countless deaths before, but something about Frank killing Caligula and Apollo killing Commodus seems so... mature I guess is the word, or well for a more mature audience. I can't describe how or why, but it feels more real, more like actual human death

I can't deal with how human Apollo seems in this book gosh I really am sorry I keep bringing this up, but I feel such warmth

the story of how Frank overcame his curse is actual BS and as much as I love Frank, it makes no sense that they spent all that time thinking of ways to keep the wood secure only for this. idk I mean id that were the case wouldn't the curse had vanished when he broke Thanatos free? he was willing to die then just like against Caligula, so why now but not then?

Don reincarnating into a laurel is peak bittersweet feeling and it actually hurt because in a camp where fauns were seen as dumb and useless, he helped Lavinia organize everything and destroy the canon things on the yachts

I'm still not over Jason's death, he really did deserve better. It makes sense, plotwise, because out of all of the huge characters from the past, Jason, Percy and Annabeth's deaths would impact others the harder, and push them to do better. And I understand that you gotta show, not even the main characters survive sometimes. Still, I'm hurt.

Thalia talking to Apollo during the funeral for the fallen campers made me actually weep. I'm not sure if it was because of Jason, or when Thalia talked about how much Artemis loves Apollo, or when Apollo "accepted" halfblood children of Zeus as his family

Also, you know who deserved better? Harpocrates, damn right he deserved better. I nearly cried when I read his death, cause he embraced it like one would an old friend in happiness. He and the Sybil deserved better. Dakota also deserved better

On the other hand, I tried so hard not to laugh at 2 am as I read Tarquin demand answers from a cat? he genuinely thought a cat would tell him where the Sybilline Books where and I couldn't handle that

This book is cruel but in a much more human way? The maiming of the pegasi wings? that's horrifying, but in such a human way, unlike what we've seen in any of the greek/roman gods series, and it's unsettling

Meg is braver than any of the other demigods were at that age (maybe excepting Nico), cause she's not embarking on a quest to retrieve an item or rescue someone or bring back their sister from the dead, she's facing her own abusive father while aiding a somewhat weak mortal in releasing the oracles and gaining godhood back. what's she getting from it all? absolutely nothing, she's gifted some seeds and she hangs out with unicorns more than other people and she's lost everything, but she's willing to lose more to help her friend. she's heroic like no one else is, because she's the first who doesn’t want anything more than being with her friend (Percy wanted whoever was taken back, Annabeth wanted to be able to be more, Nico wanted to bring back Bianca, even Bianca wanted freedom). the only other person who didn't have somewhat selfish (but kot wrong) interests while doing something heroic at a young age has been Hazel. What I mean is I love Meg and everything she does

Thalia being that chill over Jason's death bothers me so much, as if she wasn't the happiest when she found out the brother she lost 14 years ago was alive after all, and she had a part of her family back, and it was ripped from her, and Thalia is just not one to easily forget or move on from things, it's just unrealistic that she would only need a little furious session of throwing things to be okay with Jason's death as if her brother was not just taken from her all over again. it's impulsive Thalia we're talking about, who fought Percy when dealing with Annabeth going missing, it's just not her to be over his death that quickly. Sorry for Rick but I think differently

I also kinda don't like that Tyson went from being freaking General of the Cyclops, to the guy that has the Sybilline prophecies or whatever, it's important and all, but he would have been of great help during the battle and they had him waiting for help in the shrine hill like his potential went down the drain

but a thing I really loved was how different Camp Jupiter seems from Lester eyes compared from Percy's or Hazel's or Frank's perspective, it's hilarious. The other three see this place where everyone is serious and shit but Apollo just sees beyond the seriousness and it's actually refreshing, cause he's the first not to make CHB seem immature in comparison and like I said before I hated that in previous books

also Reyna laughing watered my plants, cured my depression, and made the world okay again, I just love her

all in all, this is my favorite book of ToA so far, and I'm really excited to see what's to come, and how Apollo and Meg will face Nero and Python, but more  than anything I'm looking forward to what will happen to Apollo, and whether if given the choice, he'd go back to being a selfish god or remain mortal for a while, with his newfound friends

Also I really miss Annabeth so can I please see Annabeth, I just want to see her cause she won't deal with Apollo's shit and I can't wait to see that, I miss my girl

[my-name-is-apollo]

Okay! I finished reading the tyrants tomb and over all! I liked it a lot! Of course there are inconsistencies, some mistakes on Rick's side, and of course things that I didn't like because I'm a mythology fan, but whatever, the story kept me going and I finished the whole book in a day (which I usually don't). So! Here are my thoughts, in no particular order:

- My queen Reyna was SLAYING! Literally y'all! I've never loved her more!

- All ships please step aside, the only true ship we need is Apollo x Arrow of Dodona

- seriously though can we appreciate how encouraging the arrow was?

- ugh Ugly Sobbing at Jason's funeral! UGH!!

- again. JAASOOOONNNN!!! 😭😭😭😭😭

- Oh god Apollo go ahead and adopt Frank already!

- When Frank said he can't imagine a world without Apollo in it! My heart made a somersault and exploded into dust!

- I mean lets be honest, literally all the Apollo Frank interactions were good & wholesome

- LAVINIA! I love her! aksjekwkw! Lesbian! Yes!

- Meg and Apollo! MEG AND APOLLO! Meg saying she doesn't wanna lose Apollo too! Apollo saying she was like his own lil sister! 😭 I can't! So pure!

- When Apollo said "Come here...please" had Meg fell into his arms 😍😭💕💞💖💓💕💓

- OH ARTEMIS FINALLY FUCKIN CAME! But why you leave arty, not fair :/

- Apollo saying his favorite physician is Asclepius! You can really feel the love and pride he has for his son!

- Grandpa Apollo 😂

- Chiron, I want your playlist rn-

- I was irritated with Venus. Is it just me or the way she humiliated Apollo in front of everyone even though he'd done nothing was suuuper annoying? (I mean maybe she meant good, but still, ugh)

- Why DID DAKOTA DIE??? 😭 he was my favorite minor character!!

- I was sad to see Peaches weak! He gets better, hopefully!

- I'm really glad Apollo said that even as a god he didn't like issuing prophecies he didn't even want to hear for the sake humans. It really gives insight on why Apollo neglected oracles in the first place. Boi was just! so! tired!

- yo Apollo's monologue about his love life had me fucked up, I was so sad when he asked himself if he had ever kept his loved ones safe.

- coming to know about Apollo's past problematic actions had me like, yeeeah boooiii, here we goooo

- Oooohhh Apollo being called out for what he did to Koronis 👀 that was some good shit. But I hope that, while remembering what a dick Apollo had been to her, the fandom will also remember that Artemis was also fucked up in this case.

- (also I don't think Apollo knew Koronis was pregnant? still, definitely shouldn't have gone that far)

- I didn't like how Apollo called it a "curse" on the sibyl. It wasn't. She asked for immortality and he gave her. When she refused him, Apollo didn't curse her, he just pointed out how she'd grew old as usual like a human, and hence suffer from old age. (But yeah his well intentioned gift itself became a curse to her so-)

- Idk why Harpocrates was ever connected to Apollo, it made no much sense from mythological point, but whatever.

- Apollo being a bully seemed odd to me but then I remembered the gods bullied each other all the time (Apollo even mentioned that they were ready to kill each other)

- Harpocrates x sibyl though?? Idk I laughed way too hard but the way they ended was really beautiful

- WHEN REYNA LAUGHED! Omg I was experiencing second hand embarrassment for Lester but gosh I'm so glad it turned out the way it did. I really liked that scene!

- I don't know how to feel about Reyna joining the hunters, but I'm not complaining.

- I LITERALLY CRIED WHEN I FOUND OUT FRANK IN FACT ALIVE AKSJEKSJJSSJ my baby boy! He is alright after all!

- The whole healing Reyna's heart kinda fell flat to me... I mean it was good, but I guess I had higher expectations (not ApolloxReyna, ofc, but like,,,,something else,,,idk what)

- Apollo still thirsting over Commodus *sigh* boy get your head back 😂

- Ella and Tyson are so precious please treasure them y'all

- omg Apollo fuckin KILLED Commodus with his voice!!!! Omfg-

- APOLLO GOT HIS BOW BACK!

- Terminus adopted Julia!!!

- DON! 😭 why???!!!

- I totally agree with Apollo on Jason's death being so fuckin unfair! 😭 Especially when Leo and Frank could escape from theirs!!

- Hazel was SO BADASS I can't even-

- Thalia was so mature in handling the situation. Lmao Apollo haters wanted her to tear him down but guess what losers? she's not a kid like y'all

- hey how the fuck was Lester even awake till the end? With that zombie wound, the car crash, his stamina gone, and burnt wounds? Not to mention the times he straight up stumbled into a tree or fell down.

- it's sooooo strange that Apollo doesn't have Roman kids. On the whole, it seems like Apollo doesn't do well in Roman pantheon, even his sister is distant from him there. Since he is the same in Greek and Roman form, I think he actually witnessed all the time how much the gods change, even the ones close to him (Artemis). It's like, he is constant while everyone else is changing. That's kinda sad. I wonder if the Roman side of his family gives him a harder time?

- I know I was big on "no romance for mc in this series" but you know, I'd like to see Apollo being happy in love for once. At least at the end of series. Ugh. Idk Rick, bring Hyacinthus back to life or give us Litpollo or smth please. (I'm p sure I'll change my mind about this later lmao)

________

'kay, from here I'll be speaking outside the series, so if you don't wanna read a mythology nerd ranting about how badly Rick Riordan needs to have a mythology lesson on Apollo, skip this part! (I completely acknowledge RR's right to interpret the gods as he wants, but I'm still bitter™)

- I really dislike the way Rick writes Apollo! He's the god of knowledge ffs! He'd know a lot of things! He is Lord of wolves! He should know the language of wolves! Like it's so fuckin ridiculous when he says I'm the god of prophecy doesn't mean I understand all prophecies. Though you can give the excuse of his limited mortal memory, it still seems like Apollo's smarter side is being downplayed a lot by RR.

- He's also one of the bravest gods, so when Rick writes him being scared / having memories when he was scared even as a god is 😒

- The whole "oh I never regretted this until now", "I never thought of this until now" seems very exaggerated and honestly, very fake. Apollo has lived for so many years. He has been human before. He spends a lot of time on earth to not know certain things he didn't know in this book (and series). He is one the friendlier gods, you'll find so many cases where he helps mortals in need. He is the protector of children and youth too! So like this entire "I came 10 years after a mortal prayed to me", "I didn't think demigod lives actually valued", "I didn't know humans felt like this" sounded like F grade bullshit to me. It is gods like Apollo, Hermes and Dionysus who would actually know mortals better than any other gods.

- just basically the trend of Rick Riordan writing off gods as ignorant being who never cared for anyone irks me a lot.