#especially considering half of them arent even slurs

[selfdescribing-song]

The slur song has gotta be my new favorite thing

in absolute tears about the pride module at my work

[prismicc5ay0n]

"it" isnt an insult of the past, it is modern hate that is affecting people right now. Why dont you care if you are feuling real life hate? What annoys me about "it" pronoun users is that none of them go by that in real life because they know how stupid that would be. Ive been out as a trans man for almost half my life & the amount of times ive been called "it" is uncountable. What the fuck kind of gender euphoria is dehumanizing you supposed to give? You arent as hiphop progressive as the internet wants you to think

ok first of all I don't know who you think you are 😂?? Like you came into MY asks UNINVITED because you have a problem with MY pronouns, my personal pronouns in my social media bio that I literally never asked for anyone's opinions on, and especially not some rando that doesn't even have enough confidence in their own statement to say it publicly 😂😂😂 if your really so pressed about this !!!SUPER SERIOUS ISSUE!!! why not go public with it??? Why keep coming back to my asks ANONYMOUSLY just to basically harass me about my own pronouns??? You are sooooo pressed about my chosen pronouns yet you can't say it publicly? Secondly, who ever said that I dont use the same pronouns irl? You just assume that because my pronouns are so hurtful and inconvenient for you that I choose not to use them irl? I've also been out nearly 6 years irl now and have been going by these same pronouns throughout my entire transition. I've been socially and medically transitioned (not that being medically transitioned or not makes you any less or more valid) nearly all of those years, I am completely confident in who I am and I'm not just gonna give up my chosen pronouns simply because they hurt your feelings. Exactly what kind of adrenaline boosted ego kick are you on right now to tell me, a complete stranger that you have never met, that you somehow have some sort of higher authority or position over me simply because you THINK that you've been out longer which somehow means you know better? I've been harassed too, I've been called plenty of slurs and names, I've been called all sorts of derogatory words and phrases, I have literally had people try to break into the bathroom stall just to get a look at my genitalia. I know what it's like, but the difference between you and me as that even though I've been harassed for my identity before I don't let it change who I am or what I think. I will always be a person that uses it/it's pronouns, that's my decision, and nothing anyone tries to do about it will change that. I have had plenty of people try to use it/it's in a derogatory way against me, but guess what, I really couldn't care less! Like I mentioned before, yes it/it's pronouns have and still are used in a derogatory way, but that doesn't change the fact they are still just pronouns!! And just like any other set of pronouns you can still use them in a respectful manner!! Even though it's really not any of your business and I don't have to justify my use for any of my preferred pronouns I will try to explain why exactly I chose to use them because unlike what you like to think, no I do not just use them because of some 'iNtERnEt TrEnD'. I personally identify as trans masc and agender, I do feel a connection to masculinity but I also don't consider myself to have any typical "gender". I find that he/him and it/it's pronouns suit me best for a number of reasons but mainly because I feel connected to masculinity and non gender connected pronouns. It's what I feel comfortable with, and it's what I prefer. That's it. It doesn't have to make sense to you for you to simply RESPECT ME! As a trans individual, and as someone who uses it/it's pronouns! It's that easy!!

but besides your whole tantrum about my identity in just this ask you also felt like one wasn't enough, so you sent two more asks too!! How nice of you ☺️! Don't worry I wont leave those out either, you seem to think that it is just HILARIOUS that my SOCIAL MEDIA USER NAME is crayon! And that me making an ONLINE ACCOUNT ON THE INTERNET named crayon is FAR more childish than having a tantrum over someone else's pronouns that you had no business sending your unsolicited opinion on it to. Again if you would just stop being a cowardly cry baby for 5 seconds and send a non anonymous ask maybe we could evaluate what makes your username so much more justified and mature than crayon 🤔. But I bet you won't! You won't because you are a coward and probably either don't have any real confidence to say it publicly or you don't want people to know your stance on something as absurd as wether or not someone can use it/it's pronouns!

Keep hating me for my chosen pronouns if that's what you really want to do with your life. but guess what? I'm going to keep living my life and loving my pronouns regardless of what you think or say about it, because I'm comfortable with my identity! I don't have to go out of my way to harass other people about their pronouns just to affirm my own personal experience being trans! Good luck! ☺️🫶💖

[shoezuki]

Hiii hi could u explain in Words why pdp is bad please?? I know hes bad but my friend watches him (he doesnt have any socials or rlly look at news so he doesnt get at of the stuff) and I dont know how to explain to him that pdp is a whole dick agh

OK sorry i dont have much like. Energy to dig myself atm BUT. i have looked thru for articles n other such things detailing pdp's history with antisemitism, racism, nazi symbols and imagery, alt-right rhetoric, etc.

AND heres a tumblr post saying such things w more links on it as well

I had my Own words on it but tumblr deleted like half of it. But while i wait for my muffins to cool heres My Words too thats kinda a summary

TW for antisemitism, nazi imagery and rhetoric, racism, mass shootings, far-right dogwhistles and rhetoric, etc.

Pdp has Always been so ingrained w all this shit for as long as I can remember, especially antisemitism. His own videos have contained nazi jokes, hitler comparisons (i believr to himself at times), him performing nazi salutes. One of the most memorable instances imo is in i think 2017 or so, he paid two indian dudes on fiverr to dance around with a sign saying 'kill all jews', reacted to it and posted it in a video. The people's fiverr account got suspended i believe, and they said they didnt understand the meaning of the words as they didnt understand english well at the time.

As for far-right rhetoric and dogwhistles, hes kinda been 'accepted' by far-right communities, to the point the 'subscribe to pewdiepie' meme was almost like a dogwhistle. It was literally said by a man before he shot up two mosques. Although thats OTHER people, considering his use of nazi symbols n such. Its not without reason imo. Like he had a shirt with a swastika on it that he showed up to a filming event for i think that 'scare pewdiepie' thing years ago, altho he denied that but theres photos of him w friends wearing matching swastika shirts (havent been able to find them but i recall him saying it was a 'dark joke'). Within 2018 or 19 he reccomended a youtube channel to his fans saying he enjoyed the anime analysis video. But the account was literally interladden with right-wing dogwhistles, the concept of 'redpilling' the viewers. It took media like steven universe and inputted right wing ideology into it under the guise of 'analysis', used racist imagery such as editing black people into caricatures on thumbnails, and used homophobic slurs n slurs of all kinds really. After he reccomended the channel it got like 36k subs or more

Also was his instance of calling someone the n word in a video game. Also he compared the gorrilla harambe to the african american actress leslie jones, by i believe using her image in replacement of a gorillas.

Biggest aspect is like. His addresses of this n 'apologies' had been shit. It was always a lot of 'its absurdist humour'. The kind of says sorry once then goes on bout how media overinflated it, how it wasnt that serious, how sure he was Sorry or whatever about his jokes. At some point i think he spoke of the fiverr incident as him trying to 'show' how people will do absurd and ridiculous things and how 'funny' it was. But that falls entirely flat in my mind considering they didnt understand the words, how he edited and posted a video of himself paying for the words 'kill all jews'. Thats not 'wow look how people do ridiculous things!' Yknow?

So like. Theres all that. A lot of what i mention here is within all those links, plus more. Altho one thing i wanna say

I often feel like a hypocrite, because ofc i believe people can change, and past actions arent entirely indicative of people Now. But with pewdiepie n the things hes done, its so extreme, with so much piled together over time, to the original 'jokes' and his shit 'apologies', that i cant imagine hes changed much. And even if so, this shit is so intense and genuinely messed up that it will follow him everywhere, and i can never support someone like this. This is an exception, an example of 'it doesnt matter how long ago it was' becausr pdp didnt just tweet jokes that may have been read in poor tastes, or aged bad, or were deleted but dug up. These are so bad and genuinely disgusting in comparison

[juiceastronaut]

Okay so. I watched Q-force. And I have no idea what I think about it.

Imma just be rambling so I'll break down the characters and my likes/dislikes about them before giving my plot breakdown at the end. Only the main/prominent ones because I don't have time.

Steve Maryweather-Easily the best character out of them, with Deb being a close second. He could've very easily fallen into the trope of being someone who was incompetent but expected the world anyway, but he doesn't. He graduated top of his class, and despite his quirks is a genuinely competent team leader, and wants the best for his team. He wants to prove that he and his team are competent enough to get recognition, and has a genuine faith in the people around him. It was refreshing to see him hold his team in a genuine high regard, where a lot of times it's like "We're shit but lets do this thing now" He's a genuinely well-rounded character, and (and forgive me if this isn't the best way to frame this) it feels like being gay is an important part of his character, without encompassing the whole thing. I thought Benji and his relationship was super cute and I was sad when they broke up. I was afraid he was going to be, like a second but worse Twink with the stereotyping but gladly fell away from that.

Deb-I thought her and her wife were super cute (though I hate how the wife is designed ngl adjafkldajfd). I liked Debs character, but I feel like she had a lot of racial stereotyping that wouldn't be inherently obvious unless you were looking for them, her being the strong one, and also the "mama" type at the same time. No one treated her with disrespect, and her lesbianism seemed to be more authentic but I feel like there wasn't a lot of thought put into what these tropes were and why they were bad. Her being black and making her the mama type, as well as the big strong type could be read as tasteless. Again, I really liked her character but these were some things I noticed while watching.

Twink- You know, I didn't really like him at first, I thought he was the epitome of all the bad stereotyping (though I'm just glad him and Mary didn't get put into the same category). His humor isn't my taste, and it just kinda seemed like someone for half of his lines went "what twitter stan language can we put in here?" And sometimes it was a bit too random for my tastes. However! I do like that his drag was considered important and was an integral part to a lot of missions they went on, and not just "Ah look at that dumb gay trying to find reasons to dress in drag." His talents and expertise were both respected and, save for Buck (which his whole point was supposed to be offensive anyway) no one undermined Twink for his femininity. His back story is also kinda random but did play a role in the missions as well. Still, personally think he's the worst character. Plus, he's French so minus four-twenties amount of points.

Stat-You know, in a show where everyone was stating what letter they were every few seconds I was surprised that I had to look up that Stat was trans. I...liked her character for the most part, except the part where she was fucking a robot. Kinda weird ngl, outta left field, and with her being trans I wonder if her having that sort of relationship is problematic for her. Love her design tho, love me a hacker girl. She's also listed as "ambiguously gay" tho showed to have mostly girl love interests but, okay.

Buck-He's the straight guy, emotionally repressed haha and he's bigoted. Did think it was funny later on when he was more "accepting" but managed to be even more infuriating about it. Tied with Twink as worse character but you know they tried to do stuff with him.

Vee-Really liked me a boss lady, but kinda weird how they bait-and-switched us with her actually being a lesbian, then go "no she's straight tho" in regards to Karen. I thought her and Mary's relationship was cute, wish I saw more of it. But she did feel like a random plot device in later seasons, what with her disappearing and reappearing when it was plot relevant. (Tho she HOTOHOTHOTHOT bikini episode WOOOWEEEE)

....

Okay, so now the plot....which. it had one?

It felt like it was flip flopping back n forth about whether it wanted to take itself seriously or not, and it seemed to decide on serious more towards the end, but then it would have this random plot element that would be so out of left field it would pull me out of my suspension of disbelief. See the whole "Back cracking to unlock memories" plot point. This back and forth on whether it would be a comedy or not I think weakened both categories it tried to play into.

If I had to compare the show to anything it would probably be Futurama, but the thing with Futurma is, its set in the future, so you're suspension of disbelief is allowed to stretch a bit more because all the wacky quirky stuff can be attributed to future shenanigans. Q-force, to my knowledge, is set in the modern day, which makes the wacky stuff that much wacker, because it's set in our modern times, which you apply the rules of everyday life to.

A lot of the problems that I had with Q-Force is, in the attempt to write specifically about the "gay experience" revealed that the writers have really only had a very specific experience of interacting with gay ppl, what I call the "Urban Gay" experience.

The fact they're in West Hollywood, and all the things that were listed as "universal gay experiences" but were only things that you'd be exposed to if you were in the city. I think a flavor of "white gay" can be implemented here too, which Q force has exactly one black woman, who manages to be the only lesbian.

That coupled with the fact that, there's a difference between having Twink naturally being a drag queen, the whole team being gay to some degree, and the fact they interact with the gay community often without Drawing Attention to all of those things and self-congratulating itself on concluding it. Funnily enough, Q-Force had examples of doing this right and doing this right. Right way: In the second or third episode where Mary found that guy with the flash drive to the uranium in it and seduced him in the gay bar. Relevant that it was gay without overtly drawing attention to it. Wrong-Way: Having Pride go on while Girl Boss was trying to take over the world.

And, for the show that promoted itself as representing the gay experience, there were...two gay men, one lesbian, one trans person, one straight guy and...no bisexual people. Also no nonbinary people. Like of course it's unrealistic to include every single identity but you're one bisexual person who appeared for one episode and was promptly blown up. And also showed to be...more off than the other characters, what with the stealing of silverware and all. Just, bisexual people are already forgotten enough as it is and not including them in the show, but you include two gay men just kinda reads as tasteless to me (as a bisexual person, obviously).

Which makes it so weird that Stat was left "ambiguously gay" when she could've easily been bisexual (which still would be problematic because of the robot-fucking but at least you got the B in there somewhere in the main group)

Overall, it tried to market itself as the "be all end all" of what it was like to be gay, but ended up excluding the exact people that get excluded in real-life lgbt spaces. This combined with the indecision with what kind of show it wanted to be managed to make it fall short. If you arent the very specific type of gay person who lives in a city environment and doesn't fit the stereotypes showed you're not going to feel "seen" by the show.

Weirdly though, I didn't hate watching it, and I would probably watch another season if they managed to make one. The parts that did work, I think worked really well, and even the bad parts just read as tasteless, and not actively terrible. If they focused less on making "hey I'm gay" jokes every three seconds and just let each character be what they are I think the show would be stronger for it. And I think they'd find less problems overall if they did that too. In the mean time I'll just be here side-eyeing the whole thing.

Edit: I forgot to mention, and this is a problem a lot of adult TV shows fall into, that because they got the clear to show nudity/sex they felt like they *had* to show nudity and to a lesser extent sex every episode. So just that whole "Haha adult=sex obviously."

Oh! And this generally goes for the whole "shove it in your face" part, but a lot of the characters who are bigoted were shown to be. Very blatantly so. And not to say there isn't blatantly bigoted ppl of course they are but I don't think that's where you see a lot of bigotry nowadays. This was sort of touched on during the show but more of a jokey manner, but I think it would've been more realistic if we had more "girl with a gay best friend" kinda bigotry as opposed to the "I'm literally hurling slurs at you" bigotry, especially since they're in Cali.

[woomycritiques543]

TW: Mentions of Rape/

"I actually wanted him to die."

Hmmm... makes sense. Except Verosika literallly r^ped Moxxie, why is Crim more "hateable" because his scenes are not treated like a joke unlike Verosika or Blitz? Even then, Verosika's were treated half seriously, only to make Stolas and Blitz, other r^pists in the story look "better" just because they're men, especially if you consider the fact that the story was apparently "planned" according to Vivziepop.

Because of course, they made the demon that was originally created to literally demonize sexual women, a r^pist, not even changing the label to be "sex positive" but instead doing the opposite by:

Showing bronies as "sex creeps" in Exxes and Oohs.

Making the succubi automatically "sex deviants" and playing the story straight instead of trying to do something different with it to help women's representation- Because regardless of all this "its just ficton" slop- if you have a real life discriminated group being depicted in your show- respect their representation!

All the weird, highly creepy and fetishized ways that they present homosexual men.

If anything, by that logic, I would want all the characters to die!

Which by this point, I kind of do, Stolas is a absulote trash person and Octavia definitely deserves better than some scumbag who makes sexual comments towards her (its in the "were hot" scene in Ep 2, look it up.) and keeps neglecting her, Moxxie let's Blitz be abused, Blitz abuses Moxxie, it's just a big circle of trash that people see as "just hell, that's the way it is why are you disturbed or thinking that their behavior is wrong?!" When if you think about it.. why would I not see their behavior as wrong, let alone the way that the show is depicting it? Arent I a human? Doesnt my morality still matter whether im watching HB or not? What's with all this gaslighting bullshit from both the creators and the fandom with their double standards towards how they portay bad people, let alone how they portay people who are traumatized in a way that's "give them some slack!" rather than to hold them accountable for their behavior, and all sorts of creepy shit- when it doesnt matter if the show takes in hell, it's still representing groups that exist in REAL LIFE!

-and therefore the respect still matters! Which should be a no brainer for the fandom (not talking about you, this is a "overall" thing) but apparently not because "LOL MORAL ANARCHY BECAUSE I USE THE DEMON FURRY SHOW TO EXCUSE WRITING R^PE AS "FUNNY" AND LAUGH AT SLURS LOOK AT ME IM ON TWITTER IM SOOOOOO PROGRESSIVE HARAHRHAR!" For fucks sake... it so bad.... this entire situation is so bad...

What do you think about Crimson? Personally I feel like he was a rushed antagonist because he's really cliche and not even threatening if you really think about it.

As for rushed, I do agree he was likely not planned from the beginning, or he would be in truth seekers.

And Moxxie saying he had a nightmare about his parents being murdered, while it could be true he could be having nightmares about his mother being murdered, his dad being murdered wouldn't be a bad thing, right? 😅

Moxxie also said killing a mob family would be understandable, why would he say that if HE'S part of a mob family?

As for how threatening he is, I actually found Crim terrifying. The Moxxie flashback was really well done in establishing Crim as a threat. Not just in the flashback, but also at the end when he puts Chaz' teeth on the wall.

I think Crim succeeded in being a good villain because I actually hated him and wanted him to die. I think Moxxie deserves to kill him

[bluebuckstallion]

kinda ramble-y fic below the cut, includes a metric fuck-ton of angst, macdennis, teen au, drinking, and a Lot of implied abuse/trauma

summary: macs a rebellious 14 year old tht hates the rich, dennis is a dick that really just needs an outlet to share his feelings, theyre sad together

ok no offense but i just...really love the concept of like, teen mac & charlie crashing house parties. them sneaking out of the house together and their late night adventures quickly becoming a blur of adrenaline and laughter as they jus show up at random parties someone down the street is throwing. they show up undetected at the peak of the utter chaos that is teen rebellion, take a shitload of booze, and then ditch just as fast. they go by the train tracks after and get wasted together, drowning out the deafening reality that is their parents dont care enough to notice theyre not at home every night & that life isnt going so well. and for once they can be happy in each others company and have a taste of a childhood they deserved, even if they can only find it at the bottom of a bottle

one night mac goes off by himself, probably because charlie just hasnt been as up to going out. mac has no clue why, the only things charlie’s been sputtering about between drinks every night is his ‘son of a bitch of an uncle’ who moved back in recently. mac doesnt understand and charlie wont give him what he needs to understand it. so mac gives it no second thought. he spots this absolutely huge house in the suburbs. hes never seen something with architecture like this and hell sure as hell never understand how someone can afford so much room, or what its even used for. the yard is donned with blacked out kids he knows from his classes, and the inside of the house is filled with the melody of drunk kids slurring and laughing to party songs.

he decides this is it-this is the one place hell allow himself to go without his best friend. and hell definitely save booze for him. and he wont allow himself to feel guilty for it, he never does anything for himself anyways. he strides in with a nonchalant facade and his best ‘yes-i-definitely-belong-here’ smile from cheek to cheek, waving at classmates that never noticed him before and definitely wont now. which is the only advantage that comes from being the rat, one of the sore losers in the bullshit hierarchy that is high school popularity. nobody will notice when youre taking something right infront of them.

he makes it to the kitchen and finally pieces together who lives here-its the piece of shit he has half his classes with, the word snob as a person, someone he cant help but loathe for his gross elitism. its dennis reynolds. some kid thats really full of himself, someone who helped trademark ‘the rat’ and laughs at mac while hes down. he didnt really mind, its not like he was bullying charlie, and he was strong enough to take the half-assed insults this guy threw at him. it wasnt a big deal.

but here, now-he found dennis in the midst of his own party, alone in the kitchen, half-empty bottle of tequila in tow, and what looked like mascara trailing from his eyes. what a pussy is what he was about to say, but something stopped him. dennis looked at the other boy looming over him and flinched, covering his face instantly. mac was confused, what the hell was he doing that for? when dennis realized he was fine, he instantly tried to revert back to his cool guy defense mode. something compelled mac to crouch down next to him because, well geez, the poor kid was a mess.. and he felt like it humanized him. the urge to steal his things for a taste of a life he never had slowly died down as he said hello to the gracious party host himself. “why-are-you-here”s  were spit out instantly, because dennis didn’t remember inviting some dirty street rat to his party. mac gave a really half-assed excuse, which was all he needed to convince dennis he was supposed to be here, considering all his thoughts were mush from how out of it he was-he never had the opportunity to drink this much on account of his sister beating him to it, or his mom emptying everything after heated arguments with his dad. and although it annoyed him when she was drunk, it was better than falling asleep to the melody of fighting and the threat of an impending divorce.

but anyways, now mac is lost in his eyes and they’re both half a bottle of tequila down, and he isnt sure if hes holding his hand or just dreaming it. and oh god, his eyes are so beautiful and his lips are coated with strawberry chapstick and he wants to kiss them so bad, he wants to keep holding his hand for all of eternity but at the same time he wants to hold his face in his hands and wow he wants to kiss him so bad and to taste the strawberry chapstick and god, hes infatuated. he wants to wipe his tears away and to kiss his rosy cheeks and run his hands through his hair, so bad. and it hits him that hes too deep, what would charlie think of this? falling for the enemy? fuck. but that doesnt matter because all that matters now is the fact hes really hand in hand with someone hes fallen in love with, and all it took was talk of trauma and a bottle of tequila.

theyre no longer on the kitchen floor as theyre giggling hand in hand stumbling up the stairs, leaning on each other and shushing one another as they laugh too hard to smile right and their cheeks are flush and they arent sure if its the drinking or their company. theyre trying to be quiet as they close the door to the twins’ room and dennis tries to lock it with a shaky hand. mac watches him in utter jaw-dropping awe, feeling butterflies fill his stomach and suffocating any insecurity hed ever felt before. this was new to him. but dennis felt it even stronger. hed spent so long building up a wall, hed spent so long listening to his mothers vodka-fueled lectures about never letting yourself fall in love. barbara made him promise hed never do that to himself, it hurt too much she told him. but now he was sitting on the top bunk of his bed with what seemed to be the boy of his dreams, he didnt know he could ever feel this way or honestly feel anything at all, and he was too drunk to feel guilty for it.

hours pass and now mac is laying on his bare chest. dennis has his hands intertwined in his hair and hes taken away by how soft it is when he strokes it. macs never felt a wave of clarity envelop him so softly before. hes at peace. all the droning hum of party music is drowned out. all he can hear is the soft rhythm of their hearts and their cautious breathing, both scared that this still might not be real. macs heart flutters when he realizes dennis’ breathing gets faster as he moves his hand across his chest, and he looks up with half-slit puppy dog eyes that dennis is absolutely in love with. mac opens his mouth to speak, but changes his mind. he doesnt wanna jinx it, hes so scared he wont be able to impress cool kid dennis reynolds, and he doesnt wanna do anything to change this moment. he plays it safe. as he snuggles closer, dennis holds him and macs face is the warmest its ever been, and he buries it in the other boys chest. he doesnt know how to react to this, hes never known how to react to anything but especially nothing like this. his face is even warmer than macs and hes trying so hard to not let him know that he likes him because thats something his mom would be ashamed of. mac falls asleep on his chest, and dennis cant stop playing with his hair.

dennis wakes him up because he knows everything would be ruined if anyone found them together, especially his sister. god knows what she would do. and dennis tries to tell him he should leave, but the words choke him too much to come out when he sees macs adorable face glance up at him. and hes just too shy to say a word.

the next thing they know, dennis pulls him closer and theyre both kissing for the first time, and mac feels wrong. he wants to push him away and he knows he should feel absolutely horrible, he knows god would be disappointed in something like this and hes terrified of the consequences hell get. but he pushes the thoughts away and succumbs to the warmth that surrounds his body. dennis is holding him so gently and neither want to ever move again, and something compels them to stay together. the kiss is only broken by dennis’ nervous laughter, and a smile that he cant hide. and when the boys recollect themselves they start kissing again. they never went further than that, partially because they couldnt get it up this drunk and partially because they were too scared to ruin it, but it was still nice to fall asleep side by side, even if they didnt mean to

mac wakes up to the soft golden smile of the suns rays against the bed, and he vaguely remembers last night. panic sets in like it never has before. hes never stayed somewhere else this late before. what if charlie’s looking for him. what if whoever hes with didnt lock the door and someone saw him. and then he remembers who hes with, and hes terrified. what the hell did he do? he feels tears of shame well up because he knows hes a sinner in gods eyes and hes made the biggest mistake of his life, and oh fuck when he tried to get out from under the covers he woke dennis up. he isnt even half as shocked as mac is, hes calm. hes happy. hes never woke up so peacefully before, and hes grinning. he tries to tell mac good morning but hes rambling under his breath about how wrong this is and hes going to hell, and dennis takes that as a sign he shouldve taken his mothers advice. hes utterly crushed.

mac doesnt even apologize as he leaves, he slips on his boots and gets out as soon as he can despite the wavering tone in dennis’ protests and pleads to stay. he forgets his jacket during the rush. he leaves dennis confused and more scared of opening up than hes ever been, and he doesnt know how to deal with his feelings anymore. mac tries to forget everything. he never tells charlie. he doesnt ever want to look dennis in the eyes again. he never wants to feel that way again, because he went from feeling on top of the world to being ashamed and thinking he knows its wrong. he doesnt tell anyone.