#esp since i don't say anything constructive

[ceoandslutler]

Shit i hope u get depression then slit ur wrist open u child loving fucktard

On god a drunk driver needs to smash u in between a tree before u rape a kid, you fr need to die

Fucking nasty ass pedo, literally Diddy Jr fucking off urself u pedo cunt

this doesn't really affect me but it's kinda funny how it's not ending. anyway in light of this happening, i would like to remind you that i am a real person.

hi, my name is sayé, im an adult gen z who's currently studying in university. i was born, raised and live in london and have two parents i love a lot. i also have a lot of friends but i used to be badly self conscious when i was a child so i tried to be more confident/reach out to others and ended up making friends with lots of different types of people.

my favourite colour is purple but i also like gray (if you couldn't tell lol). i really like queen esp a night at the opera and a day at the races (my fave albums!!) and have a huge crush on freddie mercury. also im a loser who listens to bts and have their posters in my room next to freddie 😭 i can do a mean serve and play really good tennis so much that in secondary school i was banned from serving during PE. i suck at baking but my best friend is an avid baker (so is my mum). BUT i can cook a delicious minted steak. my mum scolds me for always making my food too spicy. my dad always brings me a red bull whenever he sees me and loves ruffling my hair. my mum and i watch horror movies together every week (but my dad is too scared to watch them). i buy homeless people food whenever i can. i really want a cat but i don't have time for one. my favourite holiday is nowruz but i also love christmas because the street decorations in london are so nice. like most brits, i love princess diana but hate the monarchy. i used to watch "a place in the sun" often (british telly win). speaking of, i adore 5 oclock in the morning by lily allen. it's one of my favourite songs. fun fact i adore playing rhythm games and im really good at mobile ones but suck at osu!, also i may be addicted to dave the diver 😭 i love seafood, esp smoked basa, my mum fries it for me every nowruz (since fish and herb rice is our cultural new years' dish)

here's some of my most recent conversations w different friends that aren't too personal (no hate to law students LMAO)

i am a "normal" person. i live a "normal"* life. if you saw me face to face, you would not say this to me.

*by normal i just mean everyday, obviously norms are just social constructions but ykwim

if you saw a young adult w their friends, you wouldn't have the gall to even approach them.

if you saw me out w my sweet middle aged parents, you would think we're just a happy family.

i am a real human being.

i was part of this fandom since i was a kid. this blog is new but it does not contain anything explicit about fictional children/minors doing sexual acts. because i am not interested in that personally. it doesn't mean i will police anyone who does want to see that kind of content however because fiction is not real.

people telling me to die doesn't hurt me. but that doesn't mean others won't be hurt. my mental strength is not a pass for you to tell me or anyone to die.

i am a real person and so is everyone on this website.

anons need to remember that.

[weirdsht]

Refreshers - LoTCF & Reader

notes: just a drabble of you cuddling with the kids

tags: ice conjurer reader, gender neutral reader

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are open and welcome

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@chiikasevennn said: reader who naturally has a cold body temperature (ur choice if they're abnormal or magically normal) and then they use em as a cold pad esp the kids when summer because i hate summer (ang init sa pilipinas)

If there are three facts the children averaging nine years old know it’s these three things:

Cale always gets hurt.

Beacrox is in charge of cooking every meal.

_____ body runs the coldest among the people in the underground villa.

This was why when summer rolled around and the kids started feeling hot their first form of action was to go to _____.

“You guys are hot already? It hasn’t even been a week since summer started.”

“It’s super hot nya! You just say that because you can’t feel it!”

Hong retaliated as he cuddled against _____ who was sitting on a rocking chair while reading a book.

“Touch��.”

_____ let the two other kids cuddle against them. The kids instantly relaxed as they felt the ice conjurer’s cold skin.

After the kids settle in _____ continued reading their book.

“_____ what are you reading?”

“It’s a novel recommended by your dad– I mean Cale. Do you want to read it?”

Raon thought about it for a few seconds before shaking his head.

“No, it’s too hot. This great and mighty being can also feel the hotness of the weather.”

“Then I guess that great and mighty being should take a nap while using me as a cooling pad.”

The ice conjurer gently poked the toddler’s snout, leaving a snowflake as they did.

Silence followed as the four did their things. On was reading along the novel _____ is reading. Meanwhile, the two younger children had fallen asleep already.

A few more minutes passed and soon even On had fallen asleep. Leaving _____ as the only one awake in the room.

They continued reading their book in silence while rocking the chair gently. A few minutes turned into a few hours but neither _____ nor the kids noticed the time passing.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

A quick but gentle knock from the door pulled the conjurer out of the fantasy novel they were reading.

“Beacrox? Is there anything you need?”

“The young master said you haven’t eaten anything since this morning.”

“Ah!”

_____ gasped softly at the realization.

“I’m sorry it’s just that I was reading and the kids are sleeping on me.”

Only then did Beacrox noticed the three children curled up on _____’s lap. 

The chef nodded in understanding at the conjurer’s excuse.

“I’ll make you something easy to eat.”

“I would appreciate that very much.”

[radfemsiren]

i think there are far, far too many women into rape and other abusive things than can be excused with severe trauma alone. fundamentally i think its a matter of socialization, the way male=active=dominant/ female=passive=submissive has been the model for nearly all interactions between men and women for thousands of years, especially in a sexual context.

women's sexuality is constructed as receptive and men's as proactive. in this context, a man raping a woman is not only normal given the model but also encouraged as it is seen as the man losing control with his desire, and 'claiming' her, which ofc, women will find flattering, as being desired is the pinnacle of womanhood. not only that but since women are socialized to not be proactive, the idea of actively desiring someone is uncomfortable to them.

we have so many young, inexperienced women with low self esteem, interpreting even violent attention as flattering, we can see how even something like rape and abuse can be given several flattering meanings. not only that but i feel like women are collectively traumatized by the ever present threat of male violence hanging over their heads. its easier to interpret that as being desired, as being part of the destiny of any woman, so why not embrace it on their own terms? this recontextualizes what male violence means to them personally, but obviously reinforces it in other ways.

there's a quote by dworkin that sums it up if taken in a sexual context:

"We have a double standard, which is to say, a man can show how much he cares by being violent -- see, he's jealous, he cares -- a woman shows how much she cares by how much she's willing to be hurt; by how much she will take; how much she will endure."

the final thing i want to say is that i really don't know how we as an oppressed class will deal with this. because women are simply not willing to let go, its ruining their 'fun' as someone put it. all the reasons and pleading in the world isn't going to stop them. the social structures are built too strongly into all of us idk how we're gonna get out. this ended up being long so ty for reading

I agree with all of this! A lot of it is socialization and coping with male violence. Women are so deeply socialized to be passive, esp in bed, that a lot of us end up not even knowing what we find attractive or actively want to engage in with the other person. Just what we want done to us. It makes it hard to develop a healthy sex life with this severe disconnect, living through the eyes and wants of the man and not our own desires. You don’t have to be “dominant” in bed or anything, but it’s not healthy to be so lost that you don’t know what you desire yourself to actively do with your partner, and just want to have the sex “be done to you.”

And yes! These rape fantasies are definitely recontexualizing male violence and the guilt of female desire. It’s not lost on me that the woman often “gives in” and enjoys what’s happening in these stories… this is not really an accurate depiction of a rape, but rather women feeling guilt from wanting sex and taking away initial consent to remedy this. They are held hostage by the shame of their sexuality, and choosing flattery instead fear to react to male violence. They see themselves being chased and decided it’s better to act like it’s because they are a prize, instead of a prey animal.

It is hopeless to think about, but just remember that consumers of these “dark fantasy” books and “pro ship” fanfic are in the minority! I see a huge amount of women and girls being disgusted by these stories being pushed, so I think our relationship to our sexuality is healing, little by little! ❤️

[destinyc1020]

girl but what did you think about keke and zendaya? What do you think happened between them. There is a coldness there that I am getting from keke but idk why. Keke is friends with everyone esp everyone black who started on Disney and shit. It’s weird. What do you think

Girl, I'm almost afraid to even say anything on here regarding this, because I kind of feel like all it's going to do is just spark a heated Keke vs. Zendaya debate in my inbox, so that's why I've been kind of avoiding answering asks about this topic. 🙃 😬 👀

But, what I will say is that my opinion still remains. While I do think that Keke is amazing (always loved her) and is super successful, I just don't think she's on the Zendaya level of fame and success.... YET.

I mean, Zendaya is a 2x Emmy winner, has tons of high-end brand deals, trends on Twitter just for breathing, has been an EP since her teens, models, works with super famous actors and directors, has walked the red carpet at the Oscars several times, and is on a one-name fame basis.

I meannnnn.... I just think she's more famous and successful. Now, some people will argue that fame level doesn't always equal "success", and that's true, but the two usually go hand in hand.

With that said, I don't feel the need to have to compare these two lovely women at all. 🥰 They are both beautiful, amazing, and successful. Keke is an author, has been a TV host, had her own talk show, has worked with great actors over the years, and is very recognizable on her own right. I think people sleep on Keke because she is usually doing more comedic stuff, but when she speaks, you can tell that she's VERY articulate, smart, and explains herself well.

I can def understand her frustration with being compared to Zendaya though, and being put in a box and made part of an argument that she doesn't think she fits into. I totally understand how frustrating that can be, and I don't think she's wrong in feeling that way at all. Your feelings are your feelings.

With that said, I don't think we can just turn a blind eye and pretend that colorism (and, by extention, racism!) doesn't play a HUGE role in Hollywood. 👀

I think Keke is downplaying it because when the tweet came out, it was really bad timing (I'll admit), and because it makes her out to be a victim (or less-than) which is NOT a title she wants to wear, and not something she sees herself as. I totally understand that 100%. 💯

At the same time though, I don't think the fan who made that tweet realized just how offensive they came across. If anything, I think they were actually trying to give Keke a compliment in a way. They were basically saying that based on the starting careers of BOTH actresses, and the obvious talent of BOTH of these women, Keke really should have had a better trajectory career-wise in Hollywood overall. I actually agree with that.

What I think Zendaya excels at however, is that while she has biracial privilege (which, she already acknowledges), she's ALSO just played the Hollywood game much better (imo), and has been VERY strategic in her career choices.....and I kind of feel like people don't realize just how important that is in the long run. There are plenty of UNtalented people out here getting really famous and getting roles simply because they know how to play the game better. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Anyway, those are my personal two cents on the issue.

I think Keke explained herself beautifully, and I like both actresses and love to see them win. 🥰❤️

NOTE: I will NOT answer any rude or hateful asks about this topic in my inbox, so if you have something constructive to add to this conversation, please do so in a respectful way, and I will gladly answer you. 😊🙏🏾

[plasmasimagination]

hello!! i would like a hsr matchup if u still do them?? if u don't, then I apologize for not knowing im new to this 💔💔

im a gay autistic + bpd guy whose mbti type is entj :] despite being able to interact w other ppl if I want 2, I still don't HAHA I see no use in talking w strangers which may make me difficult to get along with at first.... i don't speak unless it's necessary. I love my friends dearly though and believe I have enough in my life to get by if yk what I mean. I love anything related to photography a lot and typology as well!! i like analyzing people mainly so I can feel good abt how I described them perfectly (hehehe sorry)

erm I don't get mad easily and when I'm upset, I brush off my feelings and try to be rational which has made ppl super comfortable with me!! which is good bcuz it's easier for them to b honest... I think... tho it's rough for me to open up I never do

i also enjoy philosophy sometimes!! I'm not religious at all but there's prob something out there...and I journal almost every night. I used to write poems and stories when I was 11-13, but now a lot of them never get finished smhh I love physics too esp astrophysics!! it's been my fav since my childhood ^_^ oh UMMM i like drinking tea (no I'm not british... im desi HAHA) 💔💔💔 i have always done well in school despite skipping a lot n now thinking abt failure in general makes me panic ... oops

I hope this was worded okay bcuz I can b terrible at describing myself !!! have a good day!!!

Hii sweetheart

Onto your matchup!

.

.

.

DAN HENG

Dan heng as calm as he is does enjoy the presence of a sweetheart like you

Similar to you, Dan Heng also dislikes talking to strangers, and prefers not to attempt to talk to them in any way

Dan Heng is a reader, and would love if you allowed him to read your stories/poets, he's gonna give constructive criticism but also praise, after all the best door to a soul is a poets work and he uses that to get to know your thought process and mind

I always say this, but when U date Dan Heng you get a free march 7th

So since you two are both into photography I'm sure y'all can talk about It or like take photos together, Dan Heng will be off to the side just watching the conversation go down and nodding satisfied

Your ability to analyze people will do well with Dan Heng, he's not very vocal about his feelings, so when you can figure it out it will help a lot so you can communicate easier with him

[roci-wolf]

okay so. the album.

hehe i wrote all my thoughts and ranked the songs here~ if you’re interested

but yeah i agree with everything you said. hall of fame truly is THAT GIRL!! i love that song. it’s such a trip to listen to. and it’s the perfect intro to SKZ, not just the album

and s-class… i definitely see what you mean. i think when i first heard it i was like WHOA what’s going onnnnnn cause it was just very very interesting for them to switch genres like that. and i had a theory about it too but i also didn’t bother looking into it bc i got lazy AHHAHAHAHAH but yeah it’s such a great song

and honestly i didn’t really pay too much attention to FNF at first. and then i did and i was like…. amazed. cause i didn’t know they were singing about the nature lost during the fire in australia! i– like that really shocked me. i didn’t mention it when i first wrote my song impressions bc i was so focused on *cough* criticising certain songwriting *cough* 👀😂 but really when i realised i was completely floored. not just by the song but also by the fact that they made that song? like… chris and felix… man, it’s rare for people to love their home country this much, yknow? to write a song for it. they definitely didn’t have to. but they did, out of love. and i just… idk colour me impressed and touched, i suppose.

and yes chan expressing his thoughts and encouragement in youtiful was very heartwarming 💛 i do think it’s a beautiful song. like the melody is just… so calming. i just wish the lyrics were better jejdjdhshsjd (man i feel so mean. esp since he’s my bias and i’m sure he poured his heart into it but !!! i just– can’t HAHAHAHAH)

yesss, i read what you wrote about the songs and damn, i agree with everything... and i mean, EVERYTHING if yk what i mean... i'll get to that 👀

tbh hall of fame could easily be a marvel soundtrack and i think that's what makes me like it so so much kcjskdn

and yeah, i get what you mean with s-class! it really does sound plausible, idk if they did it with that in mind but i can see the vision and it fits sooo

yesss, it also took me a while to notice fnf, but after reading the lyrics and watching the mv as well, it gave me goosebumps. now, the songwriting... is definitely better than youtiful 🤣 and no, you are not mean, what you did is constructive criticism and you were honest so it's ok! i have the same thoughts, i just didn't say anything because i've seen some stays debate over it and i wanted to play it safe 😭 but don't worry bestie, i agree, it rlly isn't chan's best written song, but the act in itself is appreciated and it shows that they rlly do pay attention to what their fans say

and i am sure that chan would be very happy to read your opinion, because how else is an artist supposed to grow if they don't see their mistakes, right? anyway, it wasn't really a 'mistake', just a work that could have been chiseled a little more. but yeah, my point is, i'm sure he'd understand 🤣 and that he'd love you just as much regardless. and as you said, i think that more practice on his part would bring much better results from him. i've noticed him getting more confident and writing english lyrics more often lately so i'm sure we can look forward to some better full eng songs

i meaaan, connected is really enjoyable and it's written well according to it's genre soo 👀 i'm expectant for what else he has in store

[codependencytendencies]

This was supposed to be better than the capitalistic b.s. we are sold but it's still pissing me off so I'm gonna scream into the void. Fuck this assessment.

Physical self care

I eat the same thing every day i don't think about it

Who has the fucking money for prevention or medical care

Fashion is overrated bullshit made up by thin ppl who dont even make shit in my fucking size

I'm disabled. I don't do physical activity. I exist and that's enough.

Hot take, it's not my fucking responsibility to constantly try to think positively about myself in a world that tells me they want me dead. I'll be a fucking realist and not lie to myself about shit.

What is it with these pretentious fucks and massages? Noone is fucking touching me and I'm sick of it being so fucking normalized. I will NEVER get a fucking massage and you can't fucking make me.

Psychological self care

Who the fuck has money for vacations? What even is a "day trip"? Driving is exhausting.

What the fuck is "my own personal psychotherapy" even supposed to mean? If it's just a more pretensious way of saying get a therapist, fuck no. I'm not going back to therapy until therapists stop being dicks who gaslight with cbt and work with cops.

The internet is the only place I can interact with other ppl that I don't hate. Taking breaks is harmful.

Who is this written for? How much reading did the creator of this little list think the average person read for work? Bc I don't know anyone who reads for work honestly.

Do you not notice your own thoughts 24/7? How does that even work?

Engage my intelligence... this is one of those ppl who can turn off their brain to watch trash toxic stuff like reality TV isn't it?

Bold of you to assume I'm an expert in anything

This list is so fucking weird. It's like stuff that I don't even think about or stuff that is not helpful at all.

Be curious... this is why I hate so many ppl. If you have to be reminded to be curious I honestly don't understand why you are alive.

Yeah work stays at work but that's just fuck capitalism don't be taken advantage of.

Journaling is such a basic ass thing and after a while it's pointless. I haven't done that since I was like 16. Not to mention it's exhausting. I'm not writing stuff down by hand esp if I'm the only one that's gonna see it. I'll rant out loud in my apartment bc that's at least not a waste of fucking time. Like who even has a thought long enough to write it down like that?

Emotional self care

I.have.no.support.system. that means no fucking ppl to hang out with.

I HAVE NO SUPPORT SYSTEM. Fuck those toxic ppl that gave birth to me and all the fucks related to them. They can go dissolve in the toxic sludge they created.

I am autistic. Rewatching things is kind of required.

Express outrage... ironically that is what I'm doing right now. Again, fuck this assessment

Fuck affirmations. I'm not lying to myself. It's not actually healthy to tell yourself you're a good person. Bc you're not. Nobody is. That's black and white thinking bullshit. I am a person that does good and bad things depending on my capabilities and I know that bc im not a fucking lying allistic that thinks they don't suffer from black and white thinking.

I'm autistic and for me that means i have uncontrollable bouts of crying. There is no allowing myself. Privileged ass person who made this can apparently controlled their crying. How nice for them.

Now here's where the REAL anger starts

Wtf is going on with this whole "spiritual self care" bullshit? Why is it so hard for ppl to grasp that not everyone thinks like them? And they say autistics have a lack of theory of mind.

Causes aren't spiritual. They are opinions and values.

Reflection isn't spiritual, that's just using your fucking brain to analyze yourself, we already covered that, how many reminders do you boring allistic ppl need??

Non material aspects of life? Wtf does that even mean? Am I aware that there are abstract concepts? Yes, social constructs are abstracts, like Religion is a social construct and im not interested, it's boring.

Find spiritual connection or community?? This bullshit is why atheists are so lonely. Yall can't build any community outside religion.

Relationship self care

Partner. No. Fuck that amatonormativity.

Relatives? Fuck those toxic ppl.

What posting on tumblr isn't enough?

Personal correspondence? Did someone forget to upgrade to modern language? Why does this sound like some 19th century person talking about writing a letter to send along the pony express.

There are no people to do things for me. I have been asking for help and there is noone. I hate this fucking state, I have nothing in common with these ppl. There is nothing for me, I don't like any of the things that ppl do here, and they don't have any of the things I like to do.

Literally all I have is my cats, and I had to Pavlov them into loving me.

Workplace self care

Chat with coworkers??? Why the fuck would I want to do that? At best I tolerate ppl enough to do my job. Peers?? There aren't even ppl my own age here. I can go days without talking to anyone at all. support groups at work??? This is some fancy blue state shit isn't it?

Can't balance shit when you don't have shit.

Fuck self care

[probablyaseamonster]

Hey thanks for reblogging so fast, I did in fact have a lot more tags that Tumblr cut off. Honestly not sure if the cutoff puts me in a better light sorry heh

I have been called out for being too mean before. What tends to happen is I have really good dramatic ideas for things to say in the moment and then I'm like "well, I'm used to people not hearing me before I bring up the gravity of the situation sooo... maybe dramatization is justified?" But that's never worked out for obvious reasons.

I'm really sorry if I came off as needlessly cruel btw. I don't want to have anything bad to say about you guys, genuinely. As a Marcy kin, as well as mayybe a Sasha kin but on my betterment path (btw not in the manipulative cheerleader side of her or even the team leader side but in the "I have opinions all the time, and if I'm not in control at all times, I'll go crazy! it's actually kind-of exhausting" type, mainly because of autism abuse(?) trauma- but like, that's not begging for sympathy it's just an explanation), as well as a sapphic who likes to imagine being loved, I completely understand why the trio are favourite characters, esp with how comparitively uncomplicated most of the side characters seem to be. With a cast so large and all.

I'm sorry I went too far, honestly I'm really just trying to make a splash at this point due to current issues and I'm really sorry I said something that made you feel bad about liking characters or the writing of the show. Believe me, I know how it feels for comfort characters to be ruined by a hater.

Lastly, sorry that I went off on you, I genuinely did not guess that you were a Sprig enjoyer. Terribly sorry about that, honestly. It's just... did you forget? Forgive me for assuming negative things about you based on nothing. I also don't blame you if you forgot that one moment before posting, nuerodivergent brains are just like that sometimes. (also remember how Sasha sacrificed herself at the end of s1 with the iconic red moon shot, which was when the fandom started being open online. So, also canon window-throwing moment kiiinda? Like the setting and intent is different but like, does it still count?) Bottom line is forgive me for being mean to you with no basis.

Actually I'm doing a PS. thing because it's worth mentioning: I'm not bringing up current issues to justify my being a bully or anything. Just as an explanation for the bad things I've done. It's honestly hard to tell where to draw the line between constructive criticism and ruining other people's comfort characters. I absolutely do not want to give any people like me the impression that they are doing something bad by making content about a character they can relate to and their happy ending, since I get enough of that irl and I do NOT want to be the next link in the chain.

So... I did some mental reframing and my problem is that I'm obsessing over characters who are basically tertiary characters and rarepairs in the minds of the greater fandom once again and making it out to be a bigger deal than it is, as I'm kinda pissy about this non-issue specifically since this is The Frog Show and I feel a bit more entitled than usual, yeah sorry I'll stop I am way more in the wrong than I was lol I'll shut up (please don't feel like you have to beg for me to come back I explicitly am not trying to manipulate you into feeling guilty with this last one btw since I have had to defend myself on this front)

"And the random ass crossover question of the day is—!"

[herotheshiro]

so in abt 2017-18, i came across this manga called sneaky red by thanat. most of the 1st volume, translated, got posted online but i knew there was a continuation. while i don’t remember too much specifics abt my reaction to it then, i distinctly remember being affected by it and by that i mean ... liking it. i remember that i had the feeling of wanting to read the 2nd volume and even a year ago (almost the date!) on this very blog i noted that i “wanna read all of [their] works so bad” and at this point i had only ever read sneaky red so going off of that, i liked it apparently.

fast forward 2-3 years to tonight, where i finally forced myself to finish reading the series since the free month-long futekiya trial is ending soon. and well ... i thought i would be satisfied afterwards since i’ve wanted to finish reading this series for literal years but all i felt was ... disappointment. i’ve had the futekiya subscription for abt 1/2 a month already but i’ve been putting off reading sneaky red bc i mean i’ve read the 1st volume, i knew it was abt abuse pretty much and i wasn’t really into reading something so depressing (i had to reread the 1st volume in this read bc i legit have not touched the manga since whenever i read it last). and ... yeah it is a downer to read with little positive payoff. [putting under cut bc WOW this got long]

let’s get this straight, my perception of what this author is trying to do is this: two guys meet, one of them (A) has anger/emotion management issues and is quick to react with his fists and the other one (B) just so happens to get off at pain (...no further comment at this) ... which is coincidentally a “nice” set-up but A wants to turn over a new leaf bc eventually he feels bad whaling on B all the time ... except suddenly turning over a new leaf when you’ve been living and thinking a certain way for almost two entire decades is not that easy. which alright tl;dr, an abuser/someone quick to physical violence trying to reform. a rather heavy topic to tackle for your debut work ... and unfortunately i don’t think this author really succeeds in doing so. 1st volume was written in 2013 and is their debut work and it definitely feels like a new author work ... the story developments are kind of unclear at times and misaki (i think that was his name?) just accepting getting beaten up by a rando is just so incredibly sad to read bc like ... wtf? i cannot figure out how they came to love each other. i mean haru i can kind of see bc they kind of implied that misaki was one of the 1st ppl to have hope in him even though he himself felt like he was a lost cause, but misaki i just have no fucking idea what happened there. like lust turning into love? idk man falling in love from physical abuse frankly makes no fucking sense esp since it’s not even implied that misaki has low self-esteem or something that would make him accept this treatment. i legitimately would like to go back in time to meet me from 2-3 years and ask them what the fucking hell made me like this manga bc it’s messed up and the topics aren’t even handled that well! this is truly a manga that somehow depicts abuse as being shitty but also romanticizes it somehow?? even though i legit just read it a few hours ago i’m starting to mix up what happened in vol 1 and 2 so let’s just move on to vol 2 now.

vol 2 was definitely more put together in terms of story progression than vol 1 (i mean, being done 3 yrs later i would hope so). i did like it a bit more than vol 1 and there were some cute scenes bw misaki and haru but ... the scenes where misaki still went to see haru even after some seriously messed up scenes being like ‘i still love you’ ... really rubbed me the wrong way bc it kind of felt like a ‘you can heal abusive behavior through love’. i mean yes haru acknowledged his behavior and treatment of misaki was absolute shit and that he’d try to change, but also that ch where they kind of just substituted bdsm as a more socially acceptable way for haru to hit/hurt misaki during sex? BRO THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS !! i mean there were some scenes that felt realistic (misaki instinctively defending himself when haru raised his hand) but at the same time it also felt like the author didn’t really know what they were doing. like i get it, haru is supposed to be a nice person who just so happens to react badly to things but ... these kinds of things you kind of legit need professional help for. simply learning to depend more on friends/SOs, completely cutting out your toxic fam from your life... that kind of stuff is not really enough to help you heal. i mean this is a japanese manga, and ik east asian culture has ... thoughts on mental health care but the way the story was presented just didn’t feel realistic at all. yes they did show haru struggling to hold his emotions in check, i did like the scenes where haru was in his own head and saw his brother berating him for his behavior, and i do appreciate they didn’t merely just 180 change his personality and pretend it was easy to change for the better but ... idk. i just simply did not enjoy reading this story and about this relationship, i felt like their issues never really got resolved or are moving in a more constructive direction. i mean i guess this happens irl (bc ppl do stay in abusive relationships despite how bad it gets) but like i just had no fucking idea what misaki even saw in haru in the first place which sounds mean to haru but it’s true ?? like you gotta be attracted to SOMETHING first right, is it just bc he’s nice sometimes (this is worrying bc i’m someone who is weak to ppl simply being nice to me but also bruh if someone is beating my ass idk if i can be attracted to that) ?? it legit at times reminded me of bj alex which is an extremely unfortunate comparison in my book and you know what i just remembered that misaki was attracted to haru partly bc of his looks so uh yeah the comparison holds up.

i don’t even know if i can say i’m glad i read through these 2 volumes of sneaky red. apparently a 3rd volume is getting published next month and i’m like WHAT THE FUCK ELSE IS THERE TO TALK ABOUT ?? i saw a graphic of the side pairing (story covered in motion emotion) on the back cover which i got a lil excited abt bc i am intrigued by that pairing but like ... what else is there to talk abt re: sneaky red’s pairing. they’ve gotten together, they’re growing up and dealing with adult worries (jobs), and they’re moving in a more “positive” direction with their relationship (i.e., haru is opening up more to misaki) while attempting to hurdle the lingering issue of haru’s abuse -- what else is there to cover ... i think this artist really likes this couple which like makes sense for them since they’re their first published OCs but it’s prob just gonna be more senseless writing. the translated caption was like ‘the sequel of the famous debut work is here!’ and i’m like sneaky red is popular? this very unclearly written thing? but then again ppl liked k!lling st@alking and some of harada’s works that are OUT THERE are popular so i guess the fetish for abuse/hurt is strong ...

i didn’t really say anything coherent in this post bc deadass i don’t even remember what the fuck i read even though i read this manga like mere hrs ago which goes to show how much of an impact the story had on me (hint none). abuser stories are usually pretty hit or miss stories i feel, although tbh i don’t think i’ve ever read a hit story because the abuse is usually romanticized or somehow resolved without any issue which is frankly unrealistic and kind of dangerous to be telling people. i admit i don’t have personal experience with abuse (thankfully) so i guess i can’t really say stuff abt how realistic it is or not but ... just very disappointed with the story. i am still struggling to figure out what i liked abt this manga so much back then. i do like the art style a lot bc it’s unique compared to what you see in other BLs but the author’s writing is just very unclear sometimes ... it’s definitely improved since 2013 but ... hah. it was not really an enjoyable read. i legit wanted to stop reading at times but i’ve wanted to finish it for so long so i pushed on ... maybe i should reread so i can more definitively say what exactly i disliked but i don’t wanna read this again.

[boatslut]

2, 28 and 29 (Can be a description instead of a drawing) for Seig and Cole? I would ask for Rob but I don't think he counts </3

oogh ok 2)🔫 Does your character have a weapon of choice? Cole is actually pretty flexible and good with a few different weapons! Ironically, while he knows how to properly use a bow, he's actually kinda bad at it, especially with aiming and hitting his targets. He does like using swords, though; but the amount of times he actually has any reason to fight something isn't pretty often. Despite being a bit cowardly, he surprisingly isn't afraid to get into a full blown fistfight if he feels cornered or is legitimately angry enough with someone and feels like he needs to.

Seig, on the other hand, is very adept with broadswords. He's got a lot of actual training and practice with them, and keeps himself warmed up by fighting dummies and various monsters he comes across. He also, uh, will on occasion fight very much tooth and nail. I won't elaborate. 🤫

28) 🔨 Does your character like to fight, build or explore more? Cole doesn't really uhhh... do much of any of the three. He tends to stay at whatever home the champion builds for him, and avoids getting into combat unless he has to. I guess the closest thing is that he very much enjoys making things, rather than building/ect construction. He's an extremely skilled craftsman and knows how to make a lot of different shit; from forging weapons, to sewing clothes and dolls, to woodcarving, to whatever else he happens to put his mind to when it comes to 'making' something. He knows how to put shit together and make something new. He is a guide, after all. Seig's definitely more of a fighter and finds a lot of enjoyment in a true and proper battle. Honorable duels is something he rarely gets a chance to do; but he loves it when he has the opportunity. That being said, he would love to explore and see the world, if. y'know. he was allowed to. he's never been permitted to leave his post.

29) 🌟 Draw a shimmered look for your character! i dont have the braincells rn to draw anything bc i literally just got home after being away and on my feet for ~14 hrs, but... I'm not exactly versed on what shimmered stuff is, but. idk exactly what cole would be like... esp w/out revealing secret character spoilers... hm. ill get back to that.

Seig on the other hand, absolutely would have his corruption-y themes reversed and probably would have crimson ones instead. crimson armor instead of shadow armor, probably kinda Nasty underneath it. id wanna say that his armor probably would have solar motifs and designs on it instead of lunar ones like usual too. hmmm

robert is. not a terraria character but bc youre askin ill say anyways just for you <3. 2) in canon, technically he's absolutely a man who just gets into physical brawls rather than using a weapon, unless you count whatever biological or anatomical weapons he happens to have due to mutations that day; such as body spines or claws or whatever. That being said, he does know how to use a gun and will use it if he has to. he's not the best at it, but he at least knows how to defend himself with one. terraria wise, though... fetid baghnahks (sp??) really do give the vibe, yeah. 28) hard to say in canon since it doesn't entirely apply. he's not necessarily a big fan of it, but he's gotten into a good few bar brawls; and has actually been arrested for 2nd degree assault before, oops ! (the dude deserved it, tbh. but. robert did attack first without any reason for 'self defense'.) he would like to get out more and get a solid vacation in, but... he's working like 24/7. fucked up 29) this ones weird! id say any kinda reversal with him would be like... techno shit instead of bio shit. mechanical augmentations... fucked up machinery and robots. he probably would be on some fucked up cyberpunk ass shit. hm.

[erikaqueenpauline]

I'm starting this post for like the third time hoping dumb ass Tumblr doesn't say 'oops something went wrong' and delete everything I wrote. continuing on about dextromethorphan, I have to tell you about the 4th plateau. 4th plateau dxm tripping (for most people anything north of 1000mg would be edging into this territory) is some serious shit not to be toyed around with or attempted on a whim. I have had some mystical, spiritual nirvana like experiences in the 4th plateau and on the other hand I've accidentally gotten trapped there and experienced hellish terrifying madness. I have ended up in jail cells and psych wards fucking with the 4th plateau, this is not something to be taken lightly. you experience total annihilation of all familiar constructs and tethers you're just adrift in the white blank abyss outside everything you can't tell what's real you don't know if you're on drugs or if things have always been this way and always will be forever ... like I said it can be terrifying or super sublime, it will make you reconsider every preconceived notions and belief you had, seeing everything from an emotionless objective outside viewpoint. proceed with caution lil dextronaut, tread carefully 4th plateau can be belief-shattering, life altering. you can also recall repressed memories in 4th plateau (maybe even 3rd) which can be really traumatic and huge. I definitely have experience with that phenomenon.

other dxm wisdom I bestow onto you 😁... lots of people like "triple C's" or coricidin cough and cold - I don't fuck with that shit cuz the chlorpheniramine weirds up the high too much... idk how to explain it but throw in that (also psychoactive) extra ingredient and it's a whole different ballgame. you get real fucked up but it's not for me any more. that being said, I ALWAYS take diphenhydramine (benadryl) with my dex, anywhere between 4 and 10 25mg pills depending on how fucked up I'm trying to get. dph is also an SSRI and an anticholinergic deliriant hallucinogen, frankly it's straight up dangerous, much more so than dxm. causes heart rhythm problems and convulsions and shit if you take too much - it enhances the dxm high to me, gives it a little more euphoria and body high and edging into visual hallucinations (esp higher amounts) but it also makes me fucking RETARDED in a way dxm alone does not, like seriously slow and simple in the head like counting things is hard lol ... so not something you want to do when you need to be functional, only good for being extremely fucked up listening to music and watching visualizers. 😄 also causes shaky hands, dry mouth, poor motor skills you walk like your drunk all teeter tottery and shit. so if you're gonna try adding in dph just know a little goes a long ways and your kinda playing with a live cobra that can turn on you. IMPORTANT: THE TRIP LOG. something I started doing long ago and follow religiously is I keep a designated little notebook where everytime I take a dose of dxm or dph (I include all psychoactive substances) I write down exactly how much I took and at what time. this is very helpful for when you're like "hmm I don't feel that high, I'm gonna take some more" if you look at the trip log and see it's only been 45mins since you took a dose of dxm you know to wait another 15mins or so for that to kick in before you go taking more shit, you feel me. it helps to know dxm hydrobromide takes about an hour to kick in, Mucinex about an hour and a half and delsym about two to two and a half hours. diphenhydramine takes about 45 minutes. you should generally always do these drugs on an empty stomach, food slows down the absorption and you won't get as high and it'll take longer. so if you know you're gonna trip don't eat anything heavy beforehand. and if you were wondering yes just swallow the syrup or pills, dxm and dph cannot be injected snorted or smoked. use caution when mixing dxm and THC you will get WAY more fucked up than either substance alone. alcohol and dxm is a good way to end up puking esp if you tend to have a weak stomach, products with guaifinesin extra prone to make you nauseated and or puke.

DANGERS OF DXM USE:

causes heart rate to be very elevated like 140 just sitting there not doing anything. if you have a weak heart don't use. for some reason extended use causes (at least for me) super low blood glucose levels, just found this out recently - to combat this drink regular (sugary) soda. dxm abuse can very often cause urinary retention! (doubly so if mixing in dph) - I cannot tell you how many times I've gone to ER in severe discomfort with liters of piss in my bladder completely unable to urinate, get bladder scanned and then catheter in the urethra, I have done this so many times it's not even fucking funny. over the years have learned some ways to cope with that (limiting fluid intake before and during trip, moderating dosage, tricks to coax the urine out of me) but seriously this can be unpleasant if you drink too much liquids and are on a high dose of dxm.

chronic extended abuse like I do causes other problems like digestive tract issues, short term memory loss (amnesia like a motherfucker), falling out and having convulsions and splitting your fucking face open, all sorts of fun adventures like that. so yeah dxm can be a powerful tool to recall repressed memories, cope with trauma, shake off outmoded beliefs, etc but not when you do it every fucking day all day, then you're just a fucking vegetable doing nothing and going nowhere. I'm trying to get clean off this shit and get back to recording my music. aight that's all for now got shit to do - Erika aka Queen Pauline

[somecunttookmyurl]

every now and then I see white people figure out/remember y'all code switch too, esp. non-americans, and it's so cute and funny 🤣🤣🤣 bless y'all hearts (honorific). i mean that lovingly, im not mocking. i genuinely think it's a great convo to have. conscious code switching and subconscious code switching, the difference between code switching accents vs dialects vs straight up code switching whole languages. it's complex and also fun. but because i know you know your shit, and also know you're not american and didn't claim to speak AAVE, im not tryna say i have a problem with anything YOU said. the opposite actually, i fuckin love this. i'm also an accent sponge, but for me it's part echolalia from all the autisms. certain words and sounds and phrases.. i just gotta tic. and accents are so fascinating and lovely, i consume them like a starving man eating hospital pudding after surgery.

it's just. i would be remiss if i didn't say this. that rising--dawn person who has to 'watch themselves bc they slip into AAVE' (which stands for AFRICAN AMERICAN Vernacular English, btw—it is not an accent) needs to tone down their desire for validation for doing the bare minimum. nobody is gonna give you a cookie for not appropriating our shit. it's basic, and nobody's proud of you for simply not being heinous, nobody is impressed with how much effort it takes you not to use the very speech patterns and cultural phenomena y'all claim TO THIS DAY justifies your people thinking my people are stupid, lesser and subhuman and treating us this way. keep that part to yourself next time, don't ask for pats on the back from internet people. it stinks of white saviorism. and lemme reiterate that AAVE is not an accent. it is a structure, a way to construct words in specific order. it is native to America and borne of oppression of our mother tongues and intentional absence of education or miseducation—an accent is the shape of the words you say, but regionally, Black people have accents!!!! depending on where we from!!!! a southern Black person speaking AAVE will speak it with a southern accent. a new York nigga is still speaking the same AAVE even though their accent is different and some of their colloquialisms are region-specific. aave itself is not an accent. and if you are not African or African American, keep the standard structures of AAVE out ya mouth. It is a sublanguage, rooted heavily in traditional English, but it is not a language for white or non-Black people to use, because white and white-adjaceng people have used it as a weapon against us since the first time we spoke. again, you get no congratulations for the simple task of recognizing one of the most widely demanded concessions in the social justice realm in the history of forever. we been saying don't talk Black since civil rights movement. you arent special. fucking knock this shit off. it's racist.

that's a lot of words to say you can't read because i know what code switching is and also literally not what i'm talking about so

good job!

[misterbitches]

i think what bugs me the most about people being lazy and not wanting to read or pushing a narrative of something you didn't say or do onto you, then saying something about the method of delivery, and then getting their hackles raised at anything that pushes back (i do this too. like many times i overreact because i didnt read something right, or i don't think that maybe i don't need to be heard, or i take on a more combative tone even if someone agrees. so i need to de-escalate for myself as well and be aware....) esp on the basis of length and some grammar and syntax issues—not necessarily the content itself—is that i like....edit for a living.

i have a dumb BA and i have my MFA. i copy-edit on the side as a side-job and i am good at it. i am a literal video editor, a script editor, a scriptwriter, and artist. so like not only did i "train" in that, i have experience, and like.... im good at it. but that's my WORK like that's LITERALLY MY CAREER so when im on the internet i'm not trying to write a fucking thesis that's so intense and edited. i do that for my career and it's effort. this is me time, leisure time, im not being judged or graded and i don't need to put my whole back into something that is largely inconsequential. i'm typing from the top of the fucking dome and that's it man like there's a diff between a thing that takes me 5m to write and something i have to edit a trillion times on top of my learning disabilities and adhd. which isnt a fucking death sentence. adhd helps me be more creative, my LDs are what lead me to art, i'm intelligent and talented even if i hate myself and it's painful. idk how many times i can say this you know. someone said to me once "you're obviously not a native eng speaker" and fucking obviously i am but that wasnt the issue it was saying i can't construct sentences or whatever when im literally just stream of consciousness and it is just so invalidating. i dont like saying it but it's literally people calling you stupid for something you're not trying to heavily regulate because you ARE ALWAYS SELF-REGULATING.

honestly i get shocked at my typos or ways i word things if i re-read them but in my brain it just comes out that way. it doesnt always make sense either idk i try and say it. but i dont want to call it ableist it's just weird. fucking weird and it feels soooooo fucking bad bc i already know lmao im sorry man sometimes commas look like periods and i think im typing in the right tense or the right word but im not idk what to tell ya. u can edit it for me if u want

yesterday i couldnt focus at all like i was watching history (surprise) and had to keep rewinding because my brain started to trail off and i would stare at this box. or ill be thinking about something else the whole time. then i get anxious and try and concentrate and i cant. it's a lot of adrenaline buddy and our brains are like rubber or whatever ok im built different ;-;

other things adhd makes fun:

- when you receive your THC and it takes you hours to use it because your brain is trailing off. DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO HAVE TO WAIT FOR UR BRAIN TO STOP PROCRASTINATING TO HAVE FUN? dumbest thing ever esp since ppl w impulse issues <3 drugs cos we r sad every1 thinks we r STUPID

- when u literally just stare at the same page for like 10m. when it takes u all fucking day to watch 5 minutes of a stupid BL bc ur brain is like THIS THEN THIS THEN THIS THEN THIS AND WHAT IS THAT? THEN THIS THEN THIS THEN THIS esp for me as a FILMMAKEURRRR AN ARTISTE A PRETENTIOUS BITCH i cant turn it the fuck off

- WITHOUT INSURANCE MY MEDS ARE 400 DOLLARS SO IF YOU GIVE ME THAT MONEY, I WILL LISTEN TO YOU

this is something i've talked abotu a lot and ppl who know me know that i really struggle with this. maybe that's why i turned to art i dont know but i think there is a gap between people who are willing to read and people who just aren't and then dont bother. but i feel like you should sort of take the time to maybe understand a person may have diff communication styles. like i can understand people or try my best if they dont have a great grasp on english. we know what the fuck communication is. there's this one troll i know of who literally just types nonsense because he doesn't know what he's talking about, he's a dick, and he's not a native eng speaker. that's a time where i'm like i literally cannot with this person because i dont think he even tries lmao. i just ignore him bc he says dumb shit now so maybe if someone thinks that of me they should just move it righgt along ithink im just going to start being a dick and calling eveyrone ableist and start acting like the ~*~*~*snowflake~**~~*~* they dont like bc bitch if im sad we all sad now

i also find it IRONIC when non black ppl comment on a flow or whatever since u all love to use our words wrong bitch back off if u cant say nigga i take 0 writing advice from u

all this is to say i know it's not cos of my adhd and learning disorders since i can do my jobs efficiently. i think that......people are just upset when u critique something that has nothing to do with them as a person but they tied their identity to it so now we all have to suffer im sorry that you...idk don't care about the world? who knows, what do you want? lol

[trans-axian-archive]

How did you realize you were trans? I'm currently questioning if I'm nonbinary myself but I also, like, don't believe in gender as a whole and think it's mostly made up by us. I'm just mostly confused. (If it's too personal then feel free to ignore. Have a nice evening/day!)

mmm well. it's kind of weird and funny but one day I was sort of just like "huh what if I'm not a girl" while fuckin. crossing the street and then the thought just sort of... stuck in my brain and I sat with it for awhile until I realized that yeah, I'm NOT a girl. I've gone through many, many identities before settling on/realizing that I'm a trans guy, n I've been doing the whole "publically figuring out my relationship to gender" thing since like. 7th grade but I definitely was not one of those people who "always knew" or "never considered themselves their birth gender"

second of all... you're right! gender Is a construct, but it's a construct that's deeply ingrained in our society, esp in western and western colonized society. even though gender is a construct, it's irresponsible and ignorant to ignore the fact that "gender" plays a huge role in the way our world works (I'm not saying that is what you're doing, btw). gender is a construct but sexism still exists, just like money is a construct but poverty and capitalism still exist, and race is a construct but racism still exists. gender isn't technically """real""" but it Is something thats forced on us from birth, so obviously the way you interact with and fit into the idea of gender will still be an important aspect of your life regardless of whether its """real""" or not, even if that just means you're rejecting the western concept of a gender binary or gender as a whole. and gender doesn't Have to be a Bad construct either. I think a lot of times gender being a construct is framed as this fundamentally and automatically terrible thing, and it's true that as it exists as a construct today in its colonized and western sense, it cultivates and creates opportunities for discrimination and gender based violence ect, but that does not Have to be true forever and ever. we can destroy and denounce those things without eliminating gender as a whole, because heres the thing - nearly everything we as human beings do is a construct. family and culture and language are all "constructs", but they're Good constructs. we are constantly constructing ways to connect and celebrate each other out of nothing, it's part of what makes us human. the Bad constructs are the ones built of hatred and othering and a desire for power. sexism and transphobia and the western concept of a gender binary are the malicious and harmful constructs, not gender in and of itself. gender has existed positively in so many different ways in so many different cultures for a long, long time. gender is not some evil enemy that needs to be defeated. if you reject or feel disconnected from or exist completely outside of gender or the western gender binary (or how gender exists in a different culture you're part of), that's okay. that's wonderful and beautiful and valid and important and real, but gender being a construct should not discourage you from connecting to/identifying as/etc the nonbinary identity because construct or not, gender is an important and impactful aspect of our society and ourselves and the fact that it's a construct does not mean you have to completely ignore or repress any sort of relationship you might have with it

additionally, while saying "gender is a construct" or "gender is just made up" is.. technically true and can be empowering for some, you have to realize that it's not empowering for everybody. yeah, gender is a construct, but as a trans person who has spent a lot of money and time and pain and energy and tears and joy building and celebrating and coming to terms with my gender and the way I interact with gender in a broad sense, completely dismissing gender as something that No One should find important or connect to in positive way invalidates me and the pain and cruelty I face for being trans and makes me feel like I've wasted all of this energy on nothing (which I'm not saying that's what you're doing either!!) gender IS a construct and you can feel connected to and passionate about that fact, shout it from the fuckin rooftops, but at the same time recognize and support those who personally hold space for the construct of gender within themselves and their identity

I want you to know that I'm not like... yelling at you or accusing you of anything or trying to make you feel bad or arguing with you or Whatever but I just felt like this was an important thing to talk about and acknowledge and it possibly could be helpful in figuring yourself out if you think of gender in this way?? I'm 100% not trying to discourage you from connecting with/being nonbinary either n that's definitely not the point of this!!! figuring out who you are and how you feel is hard and confusing and weird and it just takes time and effort. you have to ask yourself what makes You happy, and how You feel outside or anybody else's thoughts or views. I hope you are able to work out your relationship to gender whatever that may be and what feels right and comfortable to you

I hope you have a nice day/evening as well!!

[tonyglowheart]

glanced through reddit and most people don't seem convinced about that Audible shill's argument about how "choosing between two evils should never be done, the best path is to walk away and abstain," arguing that that's what he did and the result is as you see

but really, he DIDN'T abstain in the end, he was *going to*, but then rushed to the market after learning about Tridam because he thinks he's picking the lesser evil. So, he *did* make a choice, and picked what he thought was the lesser evil, only to find that he was, still, operating under incomplete information, and that if he hadn't instigated, he might have avoided any bloodshed. By trying to be proactive to prevent anticipated tragedy, he actually kicked off the series if events in the market that led to the slaughter. to the butchery. Which results in his banishment and ill epithet, just like the spark of clairvoyance indicated.

So I do think in the end... that quote about how only True Evil forcing you to choose between it and a slightly lesser Evil... and also Geralt's quote about how evil is the same, middling or otherwise... Those to me are the core takeaways from the themes. Maybe the unwritten theme is that, it doesn't serve to debate whether an evil is lesser of greater; maybe what should be focused on instead is reducing harm, reducing collateral, etc.

Unfortunately, Geralt did not manage to ultimately reduce harm or collateral, even if he did choose a lesser Evil than True Evil, even if he did - maybe - save the lives of the people of Blavekin. The thing is, he truly never will know if he did save them or not - that's kind of trying to prove a negative. But, ultimately, he did fail to reduce harm to the people, since they were still harmed by being witness to the killings.

And I do think the Netflix show loses that, and esp by having Renfi say she'll kill everyone right at the end like that. Because even though to me it read as a heat of the moment statement, the threat then became present. And so the response of the stoning. makes so much less sense, and just seems like the show trying to present it as human prejudice, and so the people of Blavekin are in the wrong for their treatment of Geralt after the fact.

And... yeah I do think it's a much weaker story for that fact.

Oh also what's interesting to me abt how Sapkowski constructed the story... I think there's an element of... inevitable to it? It kind of seems like what Sapkowski set up with the story and the themes indicate this like... note of destiny or fate, and self-fufilling prophecy. It DOES seem like maybe there really was something up with Renfri, but also that we'd never know if her situation is nature or nuture bc of how she was treated, but all of it *did* set her up on this path that she wouldn't be able to stop, except to end in either Stregebor's death or her own. And, having learned what he did about Tridam, Geralt couldn't have not gone to confront the gang in the marketplace. It IS in fact in their natures, so to speak, to act the way they had.

But I mean, ultimately, it doesn't matter if Renfri is "by nature" cursed or not. Stregebor was so focused on demonizing her nature that he caused grievous harm to her, to the point where she couldn't be anything but what they/her circumstances have made her to be. Especially when the threat was still existent and present.

Sapkowski is, in fact, and incredibly tight storyteller, or at least the translation I listened to conveys an incredibly tightly told story. I can see why the show suffered so much for cutting out parts of the story in favor of action sequences, even if the fight scenes were flashy and pretty.

Okay, The Lesser Evil is SUCH a complex story, and waaaay more interesting than how it was presented in the Netflix show. There are SO many layers to this.

[pommunism]

hi!! i hope you don't mind me asking this but i want to get a pomeranian soon. do you have any like advice or anything on owning one (since i know you own a few)? thanks :D

yes hi hello!! i am always up for talking about poms so i welcome any questions!!

SO the main thing about poms that comes to mind is the barking. all poms bark. historically they were master watch dogs and even though they’ve been bred down to size they’ve retained that instinct. i made a mistake in not curbing my oldest’s barking as a puppy and now all four of them bark. the best thing you can do is turn it into something constructive and actually teach them to bark, which sounds counterproductive but you’ll be teaching a “silence” command right along with it, so when they bark on their own you can tell them “silence” and get them to stop. if you live in an apartment or a neighborhood with houses really close together, containing the barking is really important so you don’t upset the neighbors. DO NOT USE A SHOCK COLLAR

the other thing is the hair. i’m... not bothered by it? but they do shed like crazy and will either need dedicated daily grooming on your part or routine grooming by a professional. the one thing i will say is that my three adults all have different textured coats yet none of them form any mats. the only time they mat is when they get into burs or along their sanitary trail (around their genitals and stomach, esp in boys). i have no idea if i just got insanely lucky or if poms just don’t generally mat like many other dogs but they still need to be groomed to maintain a healthy coat

personality-wise most of them have big attitudes like classic toy breeds. they can be particularly possessive of everything from their bones to their person. it’s important to avoid giving them “small dog syndrome,” aka when you spoil them to the point you turn them into the “ankle biters” they have a reputation for being. constantly holding them in your lap and carrying them around, laughing it off when they growl at other animals or people, etc will turn big attitudes into bad attitudes. a rule of thumb is that you shouldn’t tolerate anything in a small dog that you wouldn’t in a large dog. their tiny growls may seem cute, but not so much if it’s a pit bull or a german shepherd. it doesn’t mean you can’t spoil them of course lmao but just make sure you’re also teaching them manners. they also have a strong sense of stranger danger and will be hostile toward strangers without training. socialization is the greatest gift you can give to a pom, with obedience training a close second

physically poms are actually pretty hardy and don’t have many health problems. the main thing is probably their knees. they’re prone to luxating patellas which basically means their knees pop out and sometimes they’ll need surgery to correct it. my oldest has one luxating patella that i thought we’d need surgery for but after one incident he hasn’t had a problem since. my third has both luxating patellas and has never had any problems at all despite jumping off furniture and running around like a mad woman. but even though poms are hardy little pups, like most toy breeds they’re still relatively fragile and can break bones pretty easily. if you have small children in the home i’ll tell you upfront that you shouldn’t get one and reputable rescues and breeders won’t place one in your house. small children are rough without realizing it and that’ll either lead to an injured pom or a bitten child

jumping off that, where you get your pom is important. i actually don’t care whether people buy or adopt, as long as you’re smart about both. avoid pet stores at all costs because they come from puppy mills. stay away from breeders that brag about their “teacup poms” because those are literally just sickly, poorly bred runts. poms are already absurdly small at 4-7 lbs. tetra is 9 lbs and still outweighed by all my cats. and this is going to sound really callous, but to be honest when it comes to poms you get what you pay for. a well-bred pom (not as in a ~show quality~ dog but as in one that’s healthy with a good personality) isn’t going to come cheap. expect to shell out hundreds of dollars. if a breeder tries to sell you one for $100, run away and don’t look back. if you don’t have that kind of money (which is fine!) i’d suggest looking into rescues instead

now, with all that being said - i’ve had labs, golden retrievers, keeshonde, newfoundlands, and mixed breeds, and poms are without a doubt my favorite out of all of them. they’re fucking hilarious. in addition to having big personalities they have their own goofy little quirks. they hate being left out of your activities. i can’t walk anywhere without a horde of poms at my heels. they can turn anything into a game. they make all kinds of weird little noises. they’re ubiquitously food motivated and i can’t open a bag of shredded cheese without being mobbed. they’re just bouncy and bold and busy and endless. they’ve been my greatest joy and i hope that if you do ever get a pom it brings you as much sunshine as mine have 😊