#eskel patronises a werewolf snackery across the street and is oblivious to his audience there too

[proheromidoriyashouto]

witcher modern au where witchers have to put those colorful claw caps over their toe nails so they don't tear their work boots, floors and carpets, and blankets up by walking or instinct based kneading and they all absolutely hate it.

its their version of humans not wanting to touch their eyes even for medical reasons. melitele forbid they need to trim a hangnail or treatment for archspore fungus under their nails.

they will Ignore The Problem. this infection is for the job. i have too many toes anyway. i will just buy news boots more often. i did not stub my toe on the coffee table and start to cry. i am a Powerful Mutant.

Jaskier is sneaking the caps on Geralt when he's in a post-hunt potions crashnap. Ciri gets Geralt to trim them during 'spa day' pretend play because he can't deny his precious daughter anything, but always escapes before she can even glance at the glue because its so smelly, so Jaskier takes his turn to strike in the wee morning hours. (these ofieri rugs were a gift from the prince, geralt! you animal!)

Aiden is a fastidious groomer and forces himself into a salon chair because the smell of neglect is especially foul for a witcher and getting ahead of problems makes for an easier existence, but he's also not a complete degenerate like some Cats--read: Gaetan.

Lambert "happily" goes along with Aiden because he wants to make a good impression, and he likes to think he is the smartest of his brothers which would make destroying things he pays money for in a gig economy monumentally stupid, but his inner wolf is howling with misery the songs of his people the entire time a stranger is putting their hands on his pawsfeet. Aiden knows how much of a brave face he's actually putting on for his sake so rewards Lambert accordingly at home. (they have so many in-tact kneading blankets the other Cats think Something Is Up when they poke around)

Eskel grits his teeth and does the work himself often enough he doesn't have to wear the nail caps. The glue stench is overwhelmingly bad even after its cured, he can't imagine how Geralt's twice-mutated nose handles it. (he doesn't know Geralt doesn't do it himself and has to be "dog medicine pill wrapped in cheese and ham"-ed about it until after Jaskier goes an a rant after a particular tiff they've had. Eskel never lets Pretty Boy live it down.) People already don't like his face, the last thing he needs is people assuming he's as much a beast as they think witchers are by neglecting basic hygiene and the state of one's home.

Vesemir is an old dog of a witcher living in his mountain keep. He doesn't bother with that city-slicker nonsense and walks around barefoot. He only wears boots for jobs which he doesn't do much anymore, and if they rip, well, he can blame a monster. The floors of the keep were built with hard stone they'd be pressed to scatch if they tried so whats it matter. Until an old flame, the dignified and ever as lovely Countess Mignole, buys a home at the base of the mountain and suddenly it matters so much to be presentable. It is difficult to be a charming old man when your feet smell of neglected archspore infection strongly enough a human can be offput by it and you don't have boots that might last a day walking through town with a woman on his arm. (the boys and Aiden have to hold him down as he fights like a dying bear while Jaskier and Eskel Do Something about his horrible old wolf paws.) in the end, Mignole finds the assorted colors of the nail caps very charming indeed. Vesemir complains about it for the rest of his days when she's visiting the grandchildren out of town.