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#envying lesbians and the last time i felt like that was when i found out abt trans ppl and i know transmasc lesbians exist yk But im
sweetsweetloverlover · 4 months
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AAUGHGFAAGHHHUGSSHKL HSGHHH (<- having gender thoughts)
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cowboy-heart · 2 months
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'an elephant in the room' - an original poem about fear, shame, and internalised homo/transphobia
(ID below the cut)
[Images ID: an original poem titled 'An Elephant in the Room' by Ren H., the OP of the post:
I’m only checking out a library book but she’s there. they’re always there, guiding my larger hand like a ghost. I think there always remains something of the afraid, of the isolated memory. it was the summer of my 25th year and I finally began to use the library again. I gave them my new name, like a wrapped melted sweet that’d been in my pocket for years. I perused their virtual catalogue and.
found myself. typing with a pessimistic finger, like a pointer finger on a planchette, a breath under water. but somehow results came up, a couple pages of lesbian literature. it shouldn’t be a surprise – all the local libraries are connected now. but there’s still that child, expecting to once again reach into a shadow and only grip air. I think of my prized artefact: Stone Butch Blues. afraid to even hold it in case it trickles between my fingers, makes a puddle to drown me in, and I’m emptyhanded again. but if you never reach for something your hands will always be empty.
the first time I read it was in my university room, checked out from their library. it was the first thing like me I had held, hidden in my room, and I drank it until my body was an ocean.
I don’t know how to stop hiding. to not give ‘Miss’ when asked my title. to not keep my gender as an intimate whisper. to stop avoiding mention of a partner in a workplace. when a summer temp joined my last job, I winced at their ‘he/they’ pronoun pin but then felt envy and shame. I have no shame but
God, I have fear. of what I don’t know. I am ashamed of the fear. I don’t want my life to be harder than it already has been. I don’t have the privilege of being able to hide and yet and yet I still keep an elephant in the room. an elephant that follows me into spaces too small for it. hoping nobody sees it. I fall asleep with an elephant on my chest, crushing my heart. I can wear pins and patches, shirts and denim jackets – fuck, even tattoos – telling everyone. but how do I say it? acknowledge the elephant? risk a breath underwater?
how do I tell that nine-year-old that it’s safe to come out now? especially when I know it’s not. but we have to anyway. we have to. we have to live and not just survive.
end ID].
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mantheguillotine · 8 months
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Don’t know where else to put this so guess I’ll put it here. I’ve been out as non-binary for a few years now and within that i have always identified as gender fluid. But since I’ve found myself a supportive queer community and participate less in hetero spaces I’ve felt less inclined towards feminine gender expression.
I have identified as bisexual since middle school and now I’m having a small crisis of how much of my femininity was ever for myself and how much of it was just out of service to the straight male gaze. Or how much of my relationship with my femininity has been sullied by my traumatic experiences dating cis men.
When embracing my femininity in the past I felt powerful, but more like an object. It does make me feel hot and interesting and fashionable. But in the last year or so dressing femme in public has given me major anxiety, like I’m performing against my will and nervous about the type of attention I might receive. When I dress femme everyone just sees and treats me as a feminine woman. I enjoy going hyper femme and looking almost more like a cartoon, but that still feels uncomfortable because it garners a lot of attention and I’m not dressing that way for attention I’m dressing that way for me. And when I dress moderately feminine to masc people just assume I’m a lesbian. But like even my queer friends don’t recognize me when I’m femme because I wear wigs to affirm my gender and they aren’t used to seeing me that way. And not being recognized by my own community because I’m not always visibly queer just hurts.
I know we aren’t supposed to let what other people think of us have such an influence on how we express ourselves but it can be so frustrating feeling like my identity is too big and can never be fully represented at one time. I guess I’m just feeling confused and tired of trying to figure it out. Sometimes I envy binary trans folks because they can work towards some final goal where I fear I’ll be in eternal gender limbo. I was so confident in my identity for a while and now it all seems to be in flux again.
Anyway… If anyone can relate in any way I’d be glad to hear your experiences… might help take the edge off of feeling so weird and alone.
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palaceofpassion · 3 years
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MAY I stop Time?
A fic done for a friend!  In which May lets her new semblance go to her head.  
“Okay… okay I can do this.”  
Here May rested, her body hanging above the man of her dreams, one of the many people of her dreams but still the only man.  Her eyes gazed upon his delectable form, his toned form gained through months and months of hard work.  His boyish face on the threshold of a chiseled deity.  Nearly losing herself in his gorgeous blue eyes she felt her heart thump in her chest.  Her beloved Jaune rested below her, his body glistening with the sweat of his hard labor.  
Even as she lowered herself upon his lap he made no distinct movements, no signs of noticing her attempts.  In fact he didn’t move at all, neither did the incredibly gorgeous women around him.  Taking the time to handle her nerves she gazed upon the other six figures in the room.  Her pulse raced in her veins as she stared at each of them, bare as the day they were born.  Their bodies much like Jaunes were coated in a thick layer of sweat.  And just like the man below her they made no special attention to her own depravity.  None of them moved, not a single person besides herself were even aware, conscious of her actions.  
Even as she pressed her virgin lips against the tip of his massive cock she couldn’t help but remember the day this all started.  The day that she unlocked her semblance, what felt like so long ago was only a month.  In that month she’d learned to control her powers, learned to use them to their best and make the most out of them.  And what else would she do with them but enjoy her beloveds to their fullest.  And here they all where, here they all sat around her.  
Closing her eyes she pushed down, the memories of yonder days returning to her mind as she did so.
It had been any other day, May had been at the shooting range practicing her sniping, she wouldn’t let that Ruby girl show her up!  Then out of nowhere one of the punks from Team CRDL decided it was a great idea to scare her, so they decided that they’d take a pot shot at her.  In her surprise something happened, before the dust round hit her the world came to a halt, everything slowed till the bullet stopped right in front of her.  
“Wha?!  What’s going on?!”  The normally quiet May couldn’t help but have a minor freak out when she realized the bullet that should have slammed her right in the face had stopped.  After a moment it dawned on her, this was her doing!  Excitement filled her breast as she stared at the bullet, completely forgetting about those jerks from CRDL.  In her excitement she dashed out of the room, not even paying attention to any of the other students as she passed by.  She only had a small group of people she wanted to tell, the most important people in her life.  
With speed that would drive Ruby to envy she found herself in the Library, where she knew her special friends would be.  Spotting them in the distance she made her way forward, the first coming to focus was her most beloved man.  Jaune Arc, the only person who would go out of their way to talk to a wallflower like her.  He’d gone out of his way to talk to her when no one else would at the beginning of initiation.  Being teamed with him had done nothing but cause her near case heart attacks.  She’d pretend not to stare when he’d come out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel.  She was only so strong though, weak willed as she was, she'd gaze upon his figure over and over.  And believe her when she says he’d come a long way.  She still held their first conversation dear in her heart, it was because of him that she’d been able to make such precious friends.  She wouldn’t admit it, but she’d had many an erotic dream about the young blonde… though speaking of erotic dreams she knew she wasn’t the only one.
To his right, was quite possibly the single most gorgeous woman in existence.  A beauty who made lesbians out of even straight women, Pyrrha Nikos.  The all Star Champion, the invincible girl, the untouchable unapproachable or at least that’s what May used to think.  If it hadn’t been for Jaune she may have never seen the real girl underneath, the one who was just as lonely as her, who only wanted to make friends.  They both owed a lot to Jaune, and if she was being honest, Pyrrha was probably her biggest rival for his affection.  At least she would have been if not for her also being a target of May’s pining heart.  The woman was amazing, strong, powerful, glorious, gorgeous!  But more than that she was just a girl, a sweet and loving girl that like herself was just happy spending time with her friends.  
Then there was the girl to his left, the dark skinned beauty Ciel Soleil, her own partner.  She hadn’t really known what to think of the girls when they first met.  But now they were as thick as thieves, even if Ciel rarely ever spoke.  She owed much of this to her previous two teammates, they’d taken the time to get everyone to sit and talk with one another.  She knew that if they’d been left to their own devices then neither her nor Ciel would have taken the time to become friends.  She would have surely regretted that decision.  Despite her cold nature, May knew she cared in the end, she herself was an incredibly sweet woman who May couldn’t help but feel an affinity for.
To Ciel’s own left, there was Penny Poledina, her odd but rather fun friend who had come along with her Atlas.  The two had originally planned to be partners, but because of Ciel accidentally running into May first those plans had become derailed.  Things had worked out surprisingly well as Penny would visit the four of them frequently, becoming fast friends.  May herself was surprised at how quickly Jaune had adapted to Penny’s inquisitive nature, he himself admitted to having seven sisters so he had grown to become rather patient.  She was incredibly adorable, and May couldn’t help but feel her heart flutter every time the inquisitive girl spoke to ehr.
In front of them were sitting the other three members of their little friend group.  One being the second year Velvet Scarlatina, a student who had somehow just kind of drifted into their little group.  May couldn’t even remember when she first showed up, but she was now a full part of their group.  And honestly she didn’t really mind her, though she saw the way she looked at Jaune, not that May could have blamed her.  The girl herself was quite the beauty, her adorable ears expressed a lot of her emotion, and well May would be lying if she said she HADN’T stared at that nice plump rear of hers.  
To her right was another odd one to join their friend group, Reese Chloris, she’d apparently been having issues with some of the girls from team NDGO, and Pyrrha happened to walk by.  Not one to let things like injustice go unpunished, she stepped in and absolutely humiliated them.  It was pretty obvious that Reese had originally joined by the simple virtue of her own lust and admiration towards Pyrrha.  But as time went on she became a genuine friend with the group.  May really liked her style, her mohawk was incredibly stylish, and her slim figure was one that May envied.
Then there was Weiss, the last member of their little group.  Member of team RWBY, Heiress of the Schnee Dust Company, she will never let you forget that by the way.  Or at least she wouldn’t have in the past.  Weiss was honestly the most surprising member of their group, she’d been a pain in her posterior when they’d first met.  Mostly because of how Jaune had been stricken by the young Heiress.  May hadn’t been the only one bothered by this obviously, as Pyrrha despite giving Jaune the go ahead had come to dislike the attention that she had been given.  Then there was the fact that she was quite mean when it came to turning down the young Arc.  He’d only asked her out three times and yet she’d gotten terribly upset with him… she wished he’d been more forward with her or at least Pyrrha or Cie.  Though things turned around near the dance, he’d realized that it wasn’t going to happen he  apologized and even helped push that Neptune guy in the right direction.  That ended up not working out, and well they’d become friends along the way.
She wouldn’t say that she was as fond of her as she was all the other girls, but for what it was worth she was very pretty.  
Even in her excitement she didn’t yell out to them, she hated drawing attention to herself, she was quite literally a wallflower.  Her parents had named her after a mayflower in itself.  Though, as she drew closer she noticed something strange, they hadn’t moved even the slightest.  That… that wasn’t normal, not even in the slightest.  Her confusion grew as she drew closer, finally reaching them.  Then she looked around… no one was moving, not a single person!  “Wha..what?!”  Fear seized her heart as she started to panic, had she done this?!  Did she freeze everyone?!  
“Please go back, please go back!”  Closing her eyes she wished as hard as she could that this was just a dream.  
“May?”  She nearly jumped out of her large jacket, her one good eye opening wide as the other seven individuals watched her with concern and confusion.  “When did you get here?”  Jaune’s warm voice assisted in calming her nerves.  
“I… uhm… I��.”  She wanted to tell them about her semblance, this was a big moment!  But… but there was a part of her, concentrating once more she felt the world fall to a halt.  “I… I did do this…”  She’d stopped time!  She wasn’t sure exactly how she’d do it, or what had brought this around.  But this was amazing!  Though… though sinister thoughts fluttered through her mind.  Mustering her courage she walked in between her friends, taking a deep breath she leaned over towards Jaune.  It was quick and small, but she pressed her lips against his offering him a small peck.  
Pulling away she felt her face burn hot, embarrassment flowed through her.  “I… I did it!”  She couldn’t believe she’d done it, she couldn’t believe that she’d managed to kiss the boy of her dreams.  Though one could hardly call it a real kiss, it would suffice for the time.  She wasn’t quite brave enough, nor did she want to abuse these powers.
Moving back to her previous position she concentrated, time fell back in.  “Uh, I… I just wanted to come by and study with you guys… if that’s okay?”
“Of course it is sweetheart.”  Her heart fluttered in her chest as Pyrrha stared at her, her gorgeous emerald orbs peering into her ugly blueish grey.  “We’d love to have you… though it is quite strange how you’d gotten here out of seemingly nowhere.”  
“Yeah dude!  Where did you even come from?”  Reese’ question nearly threw her off.
“I uhm… I just walked over, maybe you guys didn’t notice me? I am really hard to notice. ”  She didn’t mean to get down on herself, and she sort of prided herself in her unnoticeable status.  But there was a part of her that really didn’t like it.
“No… no we would have noticed you.  You’re always noticeable to us.”  All of the girls nodded along to Jaune’s words, and once more May remembered why she loved these people.  All of them, each and every last one of them.  “So what brought you over here in a hurry?”  
“I uhm I!”  In her panic time stopped again, “oh no!”  She’d need to get better control of that, still she watched everyone.  Their lips puckered in worry for her, and then… then a thought hit her.  She could do anything!  Anything at all… so she made her move.  Stepping to Weiss first she gulped, her heavy chest heaved beneath her thick jacket.  Lowering herself she cleared the hair out of her vision.  
With courage that can only be found from her new found abilities she pressed her lips against the Heiress.  Just like her namesake she had a crisp icey taste to her, one that May would very much like to try again in the future.  
Not delaying she pulled away with a small pop, running her tongue around her lips.  
Next came Reese, the exotic girl proved to be quite the opposite, her lips had an earthy taste to them, it wasn’t bad, just completely different from Weiss.  
Next came Velvet, May couldn’t help but giggle against Velvet’s lips which tasted like Carrot Cake.  “Oh Vel~”  Pulling away she couldn’t help but run her fingers through Velvet’s ears, running her nails through her thin fur.  
Penny was next, copper, it tasted a lot like copper… and silicone?  It was an odd combination!  But she didn’t hate it, it was pleasant once she grew used to it and she may have dilly dallied a bit more than she meant to.  She placed another gentle kiss against her forehead before moving onto Ciel.
She took a moment staring at her partners glossy chocolate covered skin.  Oh god she felt her nerves fail as she grew closer.  Unlike the other girls she made sure this one lasted, her lips pressed tightly against the timely strict girl and she kept them pressed for a while.  She enjoyed her flavor most of all so far, it was a cool minty flavor one that sent chills down her spine.  After reluctantly pulling away she moved over to Pyrrha.
Her heart fluttered thoroughly in her chest, like a drum beating rapidly she felt her heart about to explode.  Mustering her courage she actually grabbed Pyrrha’s head.  Puckering as much as she could she pressed her lips, spice and ginger filled ehr senses as she found herself unable to pull away from the exotically erotic woman in front of her.  Running her tongue across her cherry red lips she couldn’t help but enjoy the woman’s plump lips.  
Truly reluctantly she pulled away, her heart thumped louder and louder to the point she swore that she could hear it pumping blood in her veins.  Turning towards Jaune she just went right in, her moist lips crashed against his.  One minute, two minutes, three minutes she continued to kiss him, not even coming up for air her courage turned into a burning fire as she ran her tongue across his teeth.  Pressing on she slipped into her mouth, by this points he was basically tongue fucking him.  She lost count for how long she’d been doing so but she now knew his taste intimately!  Thick ropes of drool rippled down as she pulled away, her tongue slipping out of his mouth last.  “So goooood~”  She wanted more, needed more!  She could always feel the power going to ehr head, but she didn’t care!  For now though… she needed to keep things under control.
Pulling back she made sure to take her original spot, giving herself time to calm her beating heart she finally allowed time to return.  She’d nearly missed it, but several of the girls, and Jaune, had quickly pressed their fingers across their lips.  Velvet herself had slipped her hand across one of her rabbit ears.  Once more time stood still, and a sudden realization hit her, “They can feel it… they can’ feel everything…”  This should have scared her, should have terrified her, but it didn’t, instead it excited her, it sent powerful urges and lit a strong desire inside of her chest.  
Once more taking the time to calm herself, she let time flow again, “I… I just wanted to see you.”  Despite her meek tone she felt far more courageous than she’d ever felt.  The fire that lit in her soul wouldn’t burn away, not for a long long time.  For now though, she’d take the time to practice, to truly get used to her powers.
“Uh… well come and sit down!”  It was obvious that Jaune was trying to get over the strange sensation in his mouth, but bless him for still thinking of her.
A small smile crossed her lips as she sat down with the group, this really was the good life and she wouldn’t trade it for anything… but she wanted more… wanted more with all of them.  It was small, but she knew what she would do.
The sun hadn’t even risen by the time she’d woken the next morning, the excitement of the previous day had truly gotten to her and in her excitement she’d found sleep hard to come by.  Even Pyrrha, Ms. Wakes up before the crack of dawn, was still slumbering, “Mmm~ Jaune not in front of the others~”  
A smile slipped past her lips as she listened to their Vice Leader talk in her sleep, it was a good thing that Jaune was such a deep sleeper.  Though she’d have to talk to Pyrrha about that one day, the girl’s thirst was unquenchable, not like she could blame her.  Jaune was quite the wonderful boy, she’d had quite a few dreams about him as well.
Though… speaking of the boy, her eyes glanced over at his resting figure.  The soft silver light of the moon illuminated his lithe figure.  As her eyes trailed down from his face, to his chest she felt a knot grow in her throat.  Apparently Pyrrha hadn’t been the only one to have an erotic dream that night, with only the moon’s light casting upon him she could still make out his impressive mast standing at full attention.  
Once more she had that sickly thick feeling bundle in her chest, her breathing grew heavy.  Without thinking she slid off her bed, with light steps she made her way over to him..
Activating her semblance the world grew still. Her core grew slick as she drew closer, trickles of warm juices began to run down her inner thigh.  Before she knew it she was already by his side, her hand gingerly pressed against his thick hard member.  Even covered by his rather soft onesie she could tell just how massive it was, excitement began to boil in her core.  
As her gaze fell to his slumbering face she felt herself awash with shame.  Was she about to do this?  This was an invasion of privacy!  Jaune would never do that to her… but… but this could be her only chance… the only times he’d ever get to actually see it.  Then she looked back towards his towering member, she was so very weak.  Pushing past her hesitation she slipped her right hand up his surprisingly firm chest.  Her fingers slowly pinched upon the zipper, the zipper that held her long desired treasure.  
And without even the slightest bit of hesitation or a second thought she slid the metallic key downwards.  As she slowly pulled on the last lock to her goal a thought occurred to her, how was she moving something even when time was stopped?  How could she still hear the sound of the zipper coming down?  She’d have to investigate later, but for now, for now she had a prize to unbox.  
Her heart throbbed in her heaving breast as her goal came into sight, finally she’d pulled that darned thing all the way.  She wanted to enjoy this, wanted to really let the moment sink in.  Bit by bit, she continued.  First her gaze fell upon tufts of unsheared golden fur, “Oh!”  He was as voluminous in the lower section as he was up top.  She’d… she’d love to run her nose across it, take a moment to really enjoy his scent.  
As she continued her venture she felt her boxers wedge into her quivering pussy, she would need to change after this.  Finally she reached the very tip, and with one last pull she allowed it to spring free.  She felt as if she’d used her semblance on herself, her mind went blank as everything stood still.  There it was, in all it’s massive glory, “Could… would… would it fit?”  She couldn’t help but tremble at the sight, both in awe and fear at the mighty shaft that stood at hopefully full attention in front of her.
She couldn’t help but feel in awe of how mighty it was, but at the same time, the very thought of trying to slide it inside of her frightened her.  She would need to practice, need to get ready for when the time came.  But!  That was not why she was here, no she was here to… to… to help her leader!  Yes!  That’s why she’d come this far, he must have been in so much pain, so she as his faithful teammate, had to do her duty and help… help relieve his stress… yes… right that’s what she was doing.  This was for him, this wasn’t for her…  right.  At least that’s what she told herself.  
Once she’d taken the zipper to the very end she had decided on repositioning herself.  Laying herself between his legs, she allowed herself to really get close up and personal with hopefully her future husband’s mighty… p… penis.  She felt her face flush hot at the thought of using the word!  Still… something was odd, she’d tested it before but she could definitely taste things even with time frozen.  But apparently she was also able to smell them, her nose was assaulted by a thick strong musk, one that was mixed with the scent of spice.  That in itself had answered a question that was at the back of her mind, did he shampoo his pubic hairs?  The answer was apparently a strong yes!  
Still… it was impressive, impressive with how even after he’d spent nearly 25 minutes in the shower he still had this strong… powerful… tantalizing… invigorating odor to him!  Pressing her nose forward she pressed herself between his thick heavy sack, and his impressive… massive… gorging c...c...cock… yes that’s what this was!  She felt his flesh move against her touch, she’d almost jumped back when she realized that it hadn’t been as hard as she thought.  Instead she felt warmth, felt his touch against her face.  This… this was good… she’d been worried about how well this would turn out.  But as she took in deep strong breaths she knew it was going to be amazing.  Burying her nose against the base of his penis, she allowed herself the time to take in his scent.  She was practically marinating in it, and she loved every last second.
Her instincts took control of her actions, without realizing it she’d already brought the tip of her tongue to the slit at the head of his massive cock.  Before she could stop herself she’d already moved in to get a taste, running her pink muscle across his sensitive glands, scooping up bits of frozen precum as she dug into the tiny hole.  Once she’d finished she took the moment to savor his thick and natural flavors.  She’d read that most women hated the taste, but she found herself becoming addicted to the salty tangy flavor.  
Once she’d pulled back she took the time to admire the view in front of her.  “I can’t believe I’m doing this… it’s… it’s so wonderful.”  She wanted him, wanted to feel so very full, wanted to slide that thick hard cock between her needy pussy.  She could feel her womb tighten at the thought, begging for her to mount him and breed herself on her unsuspecting love.  
However, she still had enough self restraint, it was too early for that.  She couldn’t let herself be carried away… though… though she could help him out a little right?  He’d been there for her from the very beginning, it would only be right if she were to… were to help him get off.  Just… look how hard… and pent up he must have been.  Right, she was just being a good friend… a good… a good follower!  Yes that’s what she was doing…
WIth her final bits of self control crumbling before her she took the time to move forward.  Once more she placed her nose between his cock and balls allowing his scent to invade her nose.  She couldn’t get enough of it!  She hadn’t realized just how amazing scents could be till today, but here she was stuffing her face into her beloved man’s balls like a… a… a horny little slut… “Ahhh~”  She felt her pussy clench at the thought alone, her body shook with excitement in response.  “I… I’m a dirty… I’m a dirty little slut.”  That crumbling self control was gone, and now only her desires leaked out.  
“I want you to breed me… I want you to breed me!  Breed Pyrrha!  Breed CIel!  Breed Reese!  Breed Penny!  Breed Velvet!  Breed Weiss!  Break all the other girls!”  Her right hand moved to the base of his cock, she swore that the hot burning member throbbed at her touch, but that wasn’t possible.  Her left hand moved between her thighs, slipping between her tight boxers her fingers moved along her plump moist vulva.  Unable to control herself any longer, consumed by his thick musk, she moved her hands in tandem.
Her dainty thin fingers ran along her plump lips squeezing and grinding back and forth.  She could feel herself growing slicker and slicker.  Her nose buried deep between his massive cock and heavy balls she continued to breath in his thick scent.  Her right hand continued to run up and down his thick heavy meaty fat cock, pumping him over and over running her fingers across his thick heavy veins.  Her brain could only think of breeding, could only think of pleasuring the man before her, even if he wouldn’t feel it.  But she did anyways, placing her lips against his thick, full balls she placed several heavy and hearty kisses against them.  From time to time she dragged her tongue across his sweaty savoury orbs.  
She wanted more and more, when her tongue wasn’t enough she wrapped her lips around one of his impressive sacks.  Dragging her tongue against the precious balls of flesh she began to gently suck on them.  Her pumping grew faster and faster, while her fingers continued to explore her nether regions.  SQUELCH SQUELCH SQUELCH   Over and over she ran her thin digits through her plump pussy.  Her fingers began to explore her thin hole, finally penetrating her needy little slit.  She could feel her pussy suck and clench around her fingers, she needed something bigger!  She needed his cock in her, she needed to be bred!  She wanted him to do her, to do so to so many others!  The thought of all of the girls riding this member, while the others watched invaded her mind!  The thought of him putting those nasty girls, those nasty insulting girls that liked to put him down in their place.  For him to have them face down ass up, this MIGHTY cock plunging in and out of their holes as they begged for more, begged for him to breed them like the dirty little breeding sows that they were.  Those thoughts invaded her mind like never before.
She couldn’t believe herself, couldn’t believe how easily she felt she was being corrupted!  But it wasn’t just the breeding!  No! NO! That would imply she only wanted his cock in her!  She wanted other things, wanted to run her tongue through Pyrrha and Ciel’s pussy, to eat them out and savor their flavors.  She wanted to stretch out Weiss and Reese, bend them in positions that only their thin, gorgeous, and lithe bodies could handle.  She wanted to grind with Penny, wanted to get tribal with Velvet!  
Her inner desires burned through, she’d been a good girl!  She was allowed to have these absolutely nasty thoughts!  She wanted more and more AND MORE!  Her suction grew harder till she felt her jaw grow tired, he was so impressive!  So mighty!  Even as she continued to invade her own body, with three fingers invading her needy pussy.  She found herself gazing upon his manly mane, the tufts of blonde hair that called for her to bury her nose into.  Scooting forward she placed her face against his sternum, dragging her nose against his thick fur.  He smelled so good!  The harsh fragrance from his shampoo hit her nose at the same time as his thick heavy musk, built up from the heat of the night.  “Oh god!  I’m so bad~  I’m such a bad little girl.”
She couldn’t stop herself, her cervix opened and closed as she continued to attack her own pussy.  She couldn’t stop, there was no way she could, her juices flowed freely down her thighs, her boxers were practically drenched in her own fluids by this point.  She really couldn’t use them anymore!  It would be too embarrassing, and yet, and yet a thought occurred.  What if Jaune were to catch her like this?  What if she started time up again… oh what would he do to her?  Would he push her down, breed her?  Use her massive ugly tits like… like handles as his thick hard cocked pumped in and out of her nasty… naughty...needy… pussy?  The thought was tempting!  She wanted to do it!  But she knew she couldn’t, she just couldn’t!  She was too scared, absolutely terrified!
Still the thought was there!  The thought that was pushed back into the depths of her mind!  For now though, she felt herself hit her climax, her body shivered and convulsed, her juices oozed down her thighs, her boxers drenched and unwearable at this point.  She fell forward, her chest heaving up and down as she did her best to breath, her nose buried deep against his pelvis.  
As her post orgasm clarity hit her, her face began to burn hot, burned so damn hot.  Her eyes snapped open as she pulled away, nearly tripping as her drenched underwear clung to her body.  Embarrassment consumed her at a realization of what she’d just done.  “I… I… no!  No!  I’m sorry!”  Running towards her dresser she grabbed a clean pair of boxers, she couldn’t believe what she’d just done, what she’d just THOUGHT!  It was… it was so bad!  Burying her face into her clean underwear for a moment she did her best to sling her moist used set down her slick wet thighs.  With a wet SCHLOP her boxers hit the ground.  
She shivered at the sound, her body growing hot as her embarrassment consumed her once more.  Once she’d slipped on a fresh pair, she’d need to make sure that he was fixed as well.  As she began to zip him up once more she couldn’t help but give him one last gift.  Pressing her lips against the tip of his cock she gave him one last kiss.  Once she’d finished setting him up she made sure to hide her… her shameful piece of cloth at the very bottom of her clothing hamper.  
Gently she climbed into her sheets and closed her eyes.  Her power over the world began to vanish, and she’d been prepared to fall asleep when she heard a loud thrashing sound and… and what sounded like a powerful squirting noise!
“NNNNGH!♥!!”  Her eyes snapped open as she stared at the cause of the sound, Jaune was twitching, his upper body jolted upright.  Her eyes glanced downwards as his loud moaning filled the otherwise quiet dorm room.  SPURT SPURT SPURT SPURT!  Her face grew red hot as she realized what was happening!  All the feedback from when she'd been stroking him was finally happening.  “Ah! AH AH!”  Under the silver light of the moon she could clearly see his cock twitching and spurting out thick globs as his onesie became stained in his thick seed.  
“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry!”  She hadn’t meant for that to happen!  In her own lust she’d forgotten about it!  Now the boy of her affection was having quite possibly the strongest orgasm he’d ever had, and it… it was all because of her!  A sense of pride filled her chest, but was quickly replaced with shame as she saw the distraught face in front of her.  Her instincts screamed to move and comfort him!  But… but she couldn’t bring herself to move, she couldn’t let him know she was awake.  Instead she watched him, watched as he stared in panic at his own sputtering cock the obvious shame built upon his face… it did things to her... things she didn’t want to admit.
“Hah hah hah…”  His panting echoed and sunk into her ears, it was… it was doing things to her.  She could feel her core heat up once more.  “I… why… I… no….”  Despite how terrible she felt, that small tinge of pride still filled her chest.  “Why… I… no… I… they can’t see this… they… they’d hate me…  I can’t… I cant believe I had a… wet dream about all of them… why…”  She nearly flinched when he turned towards her.  “I’m sorry May… I can’t… I can’t believe I… to you…”
Had he been having a wet dream?!  Was she in it?!  Was that why he was apologizing?!  “You… I’m… I’m such a bad friend.”  Even with her eyes closed shut as they were, she could still make out the sounds of him heading to the bathroom, obviously to get changed and to clean off… off that thick… stain on his onesie… that rich… fresh…  and like that the world stopped once more.
Once more she got up, making her way around him she quickly unzipped his onesie, unable to resist the treat in front of her!  Once she’d gotten the zipper all the way down she was treated with his cum coated cock.  She remembered the previous embarrassment!  Remembering how bad she felt!  But how could she resist?!  Quickly she moved, running her tongue along his still thick hard shaft she lapped up his thick honeyed cum.  “Schow good!  You taste schow bery good!”  She couldn’t stop it, she couldn’t stop till she consumed every last bit.  And there was just so much!  So very much very much.  For what felt like forever she continued to lap away, consuming and gulping down as mucha s she could.  Tasting his flavors so directly had nearly lit her fire again, but she needed to control herself.  
Once she’d made sure to have consumed as much as she could, even going as far as to lick what she could off of his onesie she went back to bed.  Letting time return she heard him nearly fall over, “Wha?!”  He’d apparently grown weak kneed with her previous endeavors.  “Wha… what is wrong with me?”  His voice released a hushed whisper, but she could still hear it, hear the embarrassment in his voice.  It… it was so delectable.  She… she was awakening tos something new.  She wanted more… but for now she’d sleep, close her eyes and rest.
113 notes · View notes
mr-walkingrainbow · 3 years
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battle for abimel? i want a power showdown.
BATTLE FIGHT WITH POWER SHUT DOWN HERE WE GO!!
Basically OverWitch + I guess the rest of the charmed ones, face the new demon of the day, the Cancellor, which nullifies any power thrown at them.
They have to really think hard to figure this one out.
But like, mainly gay OverWitch.
“Ugh,” Macy groaned audibly for the fourth time in the past two minutes, “What’s taking her so long!”
“Ok could you tone down the whine today?” Mel replied exasperatingly, “It’s not like Abby lives next door. And she can’t orb like Harry. It takes time to get here.”
“Yeah and by the time she does the DotD will be long gone!” She stated in annoyance.
Maggie rolled her eyes, “I think the demon of the day can wait for a few minutes. I doubt their in a rush for a Appointment at the nail salon.”
The eldest huffed, “Yeah but Abbys just taking forever!”
“You rang?”
Everyone turned to the source of the voice, which oddly, seemed to be nix.
But more understandingly, smoke started to swirl, practically a mini tornado, until it took the form of Mels beloved.
“Abby!” The Latina cheered, running over and giving her girlfriend a hug.
“Hello lovely,” Abigael grinned, before smirking in Macy’s direction, “Now what’s this about me being slow? Shall I remind you how long it took you and Witchbanger to actually bang?”
Macy made a squawk of protest, while Harry looked on in mute surprise.
“Witchbangers new.” He commented, although Mel couldn’t tell if he was annoyed or curious.
Abby gestured towards him with a flourish, then nodded towards Macy, “Well, this pile of nerves is Whitebanger, only fitting we have the other half.”
Harry seemed to nod in numb acceptance, before turning back to the gadget in his hands.
“Now that we’re all here, I introduce, the Cancellor !” He waved his arms dramatically for the reveal, the gadget projecting a hologram of a dark woman in a white suit.
Maggie stared blankly, “the counselor?”
Harry looked a bit miffed, “No, the Cancellor.”
Macy tilted her head, “The chancellor?”
“NO, lovely, the CANCELLOR.”
Mel narrowed her eyes, “Cancer?”
Harry gasped for breath, “-wha- how?? It’s the CAN-CELL-OR.”
Abigael smirked, snickering lightly, “Oh Harold, why didn’t you just say so?”
Everyone offered nods of agreement while Harry sputtered for words.
Macy graciously took this time to step forward.
“As my dear was beginning to, ahem, say?” She broke off to give the sputtering whitelighter a concerned look, “This is apparently, in fact, the Cancellor. They have the power to nullify or ‘Cancel’ any powers used against it.”
“Oh but who needs powers when your in the middle of fighting a bloodthirsty demon!” Abby snarked typically.
Mel would normally scold her for such a comment, but found herself cracking a smile at the humor of it.
Macy looked annoyed, but shrugged it off, “As I was saying, something good to note, the Cancellor takes the form of whatever it nullified last, so it might not look like this. That’s just the last recorded form.”
She gestured to the regal woman in white. To which Abby purred delightfully.
“At least it’s last participant knew how to dress well.”
Mel shot her a glare, giving her a slap to the arm.
“What?!” The Britt squeaked. She just rolled her eyes in response.
“Aww,” Abby cooed, wrapping her arms around Mels smaller frame, “Is someone jealous of a power taking, identity stealing demon of the day?”
The Latina grumbled a bit, embarrassed of the blush that had indeed made its way across her face.
“No.”
“Oh I think you are.” The later whispered, “But don’t worry my love, no matter how amazingly dressed someone is, they cant even manage to come close to your overall beauty.”
Mel blushed again, this time for an entirely different reason. And a bit bashfully, she turned and gave Abby a chaste kiss.
“I hate you.” She stated grumpily.
“Love you too grumpy.”
“Ladies,” everyone turned to harry, who had finally recuperated, holding an Orb, “Will you generously accompany me to fight a fashionable identity stealer?”
“Oh Harold,” Abby sashayed forward dramatically, “I thought you’d never ask!”
Macy growled jealously while Mel shared a secret laugh with Maggie. The two of them had slowly found Abbys wit more humorous then insulting.
Harry threw the orb, the Group proceeding to jump through it into a wide circular stone covered room.
“Where are we?” Maggie questioned, peering around, their seemingly was only one entrance, a small archway carved into the surrounding rock. Leading into another room.
“We’re in the Cancellors Lair, that ark leads to the cancellor.” Harry answered informatively.
Mel was confused, however, “If so, how do people get in?”
“I think I have the answer to that.”
Everyone turned to Macy, who was staring at the ceiling. They followed pursuit, only to find their room was not really a room, but the bottom of a very deep pit.
“What a treacherous trap.” Abby seethed respectively, if possible, “Some loner demon falls down the pit. And if they survive. The Cancellor can steal their powers and harvest their body.”
“No… no that can’t be?” The youngest stated sadly, ever the empath, “Some have to escape. What about the innocent humans who fall?”
“I guess some could escape,” Abigael reasoned blatantly. If they realized where they were before the Cancellor found them. They would have to have some type of powers that could propel them upwards, like smoke phasing. Because no lucky Jim could climb these walls. Their smooth as stone.”
She wasn’t wrong, Mel found herself absentmindedly feeling the slick walls with her hand.
Someone tapped her shoulder, and she turned to see her girlfriend smiling at her bashully, and hand held out.
“Head in the Clouds my love?”
“Yeah,” the Latina grinned, taking the britts hand, “Thanks for always finding me.”
“Oh why of course!” The hybrid proclaimed, “What else is a loving girlfriend supposed to do?”
“Oh you know, fight demons, slay monsters, make out from time to time.” She monologued coyly.
-“while I’d love to hear this agonizing conversation,” Macy interrupted, “We have a demon destroy.”
Both of them rolled their eyes, but gladly shared secret smiles.
The ragtag group of magical beings entered the room. Nearly immersed in pitch darkness.
Mel felt Abby take her hand, and she tried to send soothing vibes, squeezing it to show she understood.
Abigael wasn’t a fan of the dark, it wasn’t cause she was afraid of it specifically, moreover, it reminded her of being locked in the crate. And mentioned it made her feel quite claustrophobic.
A lot of her fears spiraled from the singular subject of her childhood. It didn’t make them any less valid, however.
“Macy.” Mel whispered in the dark, “A light please?”
“Since when are you afraid of- oh.”
Her sister caught on, a tad second too late. But thankfully, mentioned nothing when the room was engulfed in flames. Just sending Mel a understanding nod.
Abby may get on Macy’s nerves, but she truly did care about her overall well-being.
“Oh thank you Lovely, now we can see where the Cancellors coming from.” Harry commented, subtly driving attention away from Abigael.
The Latina still could see the flush on her girlfriends face. And squeezed her hand again. Trying to say it was ok through touch.
Annoyingly, even with Macy’s flame, the room was not very bright. And from what Mel could see, it was another circular room, but with a domed ceiling, and vine-snaked walls.
Everyone sorta teetered around, peering closely at the cylinder wall, some parts holding ritualistic type carvings underneath the vines.
“How interesting.” Abby mused lightly, tracing a line finger in the indentions.
Mel winced slightly, as the light behind her got abruptly brighter.
“Hey Mace, good job with the light! Didn’t know you were practicing.”
“Mel…” Macy’s voice sounded nervous and halted, “Mel that isn’t me.”
“What do you mean who else would it-“
She cut off, as everyone turned to the center of the room.
Somehow, submerged in the darkness, a middle platform was completely unseen.
But now, from a spotlight coming from nowhere, it was illuminated in a ghostly, nearly theatrical glow.
And on top of that platform, posing dramatically, was the Cancellor.
Maggie scrunched her nose, “Wait… is that-“
-“LIL NAS X?!?” Mel exclaimed abnormally loud.
Her brain was completely shot. How could this be possible. This shouldn’t be. It couldn’t be.
But yet, it was, no one else rocked Red dreads, tiny black & white boxers, and thigh high leather boots then the number 1 black gay pop artist.
Macy looked thoroughly confused, “Who..? And are you sure that’s him?”
“I thought he looked familiar.” Maggie mumbled to herself.
Harry’s eyes were bugging out of his head, caught between staring and trying to give the Cancellor some privacy. The bulge in his CK boxers leaving nothing to imagination.
“No that’s definitely him,” Abby purred, practically hypnotized, “No one wears those raunchy underwear but him.”
Mel blushed jealously, “He’s gay Abby. As in into penis.”
Abigael jerked her head, trance broken as she gazed at her pouting girlfriend.
“Aww,” she cooed once again, leaning in close, “Is someone jealous of a LilNausex clone?”
The lesbian flushed, hating how adorable Abbys mispronunciation of his name sounded in her accent.
“It’s Lil Nas X.” She stated huffily.
Abby frowned, just a tad, “Oh come on Lovely.”
“Don’t lovely me!” Mel denied stubbornly.
It was a bit childish, yes, but right now the Demon straddling a chair from literally nowhere was undeniably hot for the Men lovers in the room. And she was green with envy.
“Oh you should know by now,” Abby whispered, her tone seductive and lovely, “Your the only one I want to see in those flamboyant boxers.”
Mel hated how much she was turned on right now.
“Also,” her girlfriends voice was now soft, “No matter how much I may ogle or tease, you really are my one and only love.”
Ok, now she could love her again.
“I hate you.”
“Love you too.”
“Not to break up this repetitive conversation,” Macy once again interrupted, “But how is ‘Lil Nas X’ in the room?”
“Yeah,” Harry piped up finally, “He’s human. And it’s not like he’s killed and stolen the crown, and powers of some random leader.”
“OH MY GOD.” Mel screeched, going straight back to mortified.
“I THOUGHT THAT WAS JUST IN THE VIDEO!?”
Everyone turned to her for an explanation, while she blushed from the heavy gaze, and sexual nature of the rationale.
“I-In his recent music video,” she whispered meekly, “he kills satan and steals his power.”
Her blushed increased dramatically at the implication.
“Not that I’ve watched it or something.”
“Don’t worry darling,” Abby whispered with a devilish attitude, “I’ve watched it plenty enough for the both of us.”
“Basically he stripper poles his way down to hell, does a Lap dance for Satan himself, and then proceeds to kill him in the middle of the throws of it. Ergo stealing his crown. And then his powers. We avid fans all assumed it was apart of gay pride and acceptance and sticking it to the homophobes. Turns out it’s that, and becoming all powerful.”
True to their personality. Mel loves what Abby says, Maggie nods appreciatively and nonchalantly, while Macy and Harry look seconds away from dying of pure awkwardness.
“Um, why isn’t he saying anything?” Maggie points out. The sexy demon staring at them all unblinkingly, thoroughly creeping them out.
“Maybe the voices doesn’t carry when he takes the form?” Macy suggests, “So he tries to hide it by not talking? False sense of security?”
Lil N’as Cloné then opened his mouth, revealing a large jagged set of teeth, jaw unhinging slightly.
“Or!” Maggie says with a state of panic, “He was just waiting to eat us alive!”
The demon crouches low, nearly spider like. Swaying from side to side.
“Ladies! Backs to the wall!” Harry announces, “And make sure to show some type of power, we don’t know how long the transformation takes, so we need to keep track on who still possesses them.”
Mel needs no second affirmation, grabbing Abbys wrist and yanking her back.
“Mel?” She looks outraged, “We need to fight it!”
“Yeah we’ll I can’t fight it if your powers are stolen and need someone to protect you!”
Abigael huffs, “I can take care of myself Melanie. See?”
She holds her hand up as if to summon a flame.
Head jerking when none appears.
Her expression changes to one filled with fear and confusion, “Bloody hell??”
Abby continued to unsuccessfully summon a flame, hand whirring to a blur.
“Mel!” She exclaimed in a frenzy, “Mel, it’s not working, why isn’t it working? To hell with this!”
“Hey! Hey,” the Latina soothed, rushing to place a hand on her arm in a calming motion, “Carino it’s ok. Don’t panic. The lil n’as dude just took your powers assumingly.”
“Are you sure?!?”
It seemed kinda like a controversial question to ask; considering she couldn’t activate her fire powers, but Mel understood it was from fear rather then logic.
“Well, try to smoke phase.”
Abby nodded tentatively. Raising her hands once again.
The very tips of her fingers produced ashy whisps, but aside from that, their was nothing.
“Your smoking.” Maggie unhelpfully stated, as she edged towards them.
“Why thank you Captain obvious!” Abby snarked bitterly.
The brunette looked concerned, glancing at the Latina instead, “Mel, what’s wrong?”
Abby was outraged, “Mel?! I am RIGHT HERE y’a know, if your just gonna stand their like a blathering idiot you might as well-“
-“She’s been cancelled,” Mel interrupted blatantly, witch just a tad of irritation at her raving girlfriend, “Her powers aren’t working and she’s lashing out.”
Maggie shrugged, “Naturally.”
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN NATURALLY?! I have a RIGHT to be upset I-“
-“So you sure their fully gone?” Her sister continued, “I never saw the Cancellor do anything? And he still looks like Lil N’as!”
Mel turned back to the center, brows furrowing at the now empty stage.
“Where’d he go?”
The dead silence, and lack of demon, filled the room with an eerie unsettling vibe.
“Mel, I don’t like this.” The empath warned.
She didn’t either.
“MACY!” The Latina called out, “WHERED HE GO?”
Macy looked just as panicked, probably even more, “I DONT KNOW! HE WAS JUST HERE?!”
“Oh for gods sake! We should rejoice for all I care! I’m the one with my powers gone and if you would STOP bloody ignoring me id-“
Mel whirled around, placing one finger in front of Abbys lips, the other hand firmly around her waist.
“Abby. I love you. I know your freaking out right now. But please, can you refrain from ranting till we leave?”
Abbys eyes were both murderous and loving, and softly, Mel kissed her until it changed to a lightly irritated.
“Better?” She puffed quietly.
The Britt nodded silently, blushing lightly at the affection showed.
Mel scrunched her eyebrows, briefly seeing the abrupt look of horror sweep it’s way across her girlfriends face.
“What’s wr-“
-“MEL LOOK OUT!”
Abby had shoved her aside roughly, the witch groaning as she hit the ground, but enough adrenaline rushing through to allow her to roll to her elbows.
She glanced up, Just in time to see a dark shadow drag Abigail to the the darkest parts of the room.
“ABBY!” She screamed, arm outreached and terror in her eyes.
“MACY!” Mel barked, “MORE LIGHT.”
Her sister didn’t have to be told twice, “ON IT!”
Immediately, the softly glow from Macy’s flame turned into a raging fire, illuminating all that it could without burning something.
Dead silence followed.
Maggie gasped, “Oh no.”
Standing before them, with the shadows gone and dust settled, was two identical Abigael Jameson-Caines. Each with matching clothes and injuries.
“By all things science.” Macy blanched.
“The Cancellor has taken Abbys form!” Harry informed quickly, “Ready yourself for an attack from either one.”
Mel rose to her feet on shaky limbs, reading an icicle from the air particles around her.
“Alright,” her voice was steady, although she wasn’t calm in the slightest, “One of you is the hot pain in my ass who I love dearly. And the other is a cannibalistic identity stealer. So. Who’s who.”
Immediately both of them rushed to ensure her trust, voices perfectly identical.
“I’m the real Abby!” The one on the right said.
“No!” Lefty said, “Don’t listen to them I’m the real Abby!”
[Authors note - Right side Abby will be in bold.
Left side Abby is in Italics.]
“Their perfectly identical,” Macy stressed, “How are we gonna tell them apart?!”
“Their must be a logical way to solve this.” Harry muttered under his breath.
“Come on guys, really?” Maggie shot them a glare, Mel seemed to catch on, “It’s easy really.”
“We quiz them.”
After a quick group huddle, and their bearings regain, they were ready to give a life or death quiz.
“Alright Abby clones,” Maggie narrated, “We’ve each prepared a question, something only the real Abby should know. Based on your answers, we will decide if your truthful or not.”
“Great just don’t dose me with truth serum while your at it.” Both Abbys snarked in complete unison, before shooting matching scowls at the other.
Maggie looked drastically discouraged but the display, voice wavering.
“U-uh, um, y-yes. Questions. H-Harry your up.”
The man walked up a few feet, nervously wiping his palms against his button up.
“Alright, ladies,” he gave his habitual gentlemen nod to the two of them, “When one of you invited me over for dinner, what was the main course?”
“Duck!” Righty said immediately. Grinning proudly.
“Hey! That one was too easy!” Lefty argued, “Duck is the best meat for a date! Everyone knows that! Not to mention I gave Harold a massage beforehand.”
“Of course it’s the best! What else would you eat, bloody chicken like an uncultured heathen?!”
Righty paused to glance at Harry, “Uh, I get the point for that one right?”
Harry looked overwhelmed, panic evident on his face.
“Uh, um. Undecided!” He then quickly scampered to the back of the pack, face flushed while doing so.
“Completely identical.” The Whitelighter whispered to no one.
Macy shrugged, “Guess I’m up.”
She approached the twins glancing at either with an impassive face.
“Let’s see, what’s Abbys favorite nickname for me?”
“Whitebanger.” The two answer in synchronized perfection. Shooting yet another glare at each other.
Macy looked tired, pinching the bridge of her nose, “Of course that one was too easy. Any Abby could apparently answer that in her sleep. Let me think of a harder question.”
It wasn’t long before her poker face soon returned. Leveling them up once again.
“When You fake poisoned yourself, what was that one question that was actually subserviently a dig on me?”
“To spoon!” Left jolted, “I asked you to spoon!”
“Actually! I asked her if she was the big spoon or little spoon.”
“Well excuse me for messing up one tiny detail! At least I got the spoon part before you!” Left rolled her eyesz
“Well mine was actually accurate, so yours doesn’t count!”
“Yeah it does!”
“Does not!” Right argued.
“ENOUGH!”
Macy had both hands out, face strained, “You two need to stop arguing so I can think!”
The clones shut up, as she stormed back towards the group, shaking her head.
“They share a freaking mind.” The eldest stated bitterly.
A few minutes passed as they waited for Maggie to step up. Who looked severely intimidated by the task at hand.
Mel coughed, “Maggie it’s-“
“I KNOW!” The Latina shrieked, “GIVE ME A SECOND!”
“Okayyy!”
The youngest took a couple very hesitant feet forward.
“Hello!” She waved awkwardly, “I’m Maggie -wait ugh, Abby already knows that of course! Gosh stop talking to yourself and think of a damn question!”
She bit her lip nervously, looking at them with a fearful expression.
“Ok, um. Let’s see. What’s some things Abby likes to do?”
“Oh that’s easy, Alcohol, Mel, making Macymorts life miserable!” Righty laughed to herself.
Mel ignored the fierce blush that rose to her face at the implication.
“But that’s easy,” Lefty sneered meanly, “I like to do many things, all which someone could easily guess.”
“Pray tell, tell me how you could ‘guess’ I like those things?”
“Well I-“
-“Ok!” Maggie squeaked, “Another question then!”
She then proceeded to flounder for a few moments. Hands waving rapidly in anxiety.
“Um, ok then. Who’d you save my life from?”
“My brother.”
“My half-brother, Parker.”
The answers seemed to be the same, yet lefty seemed to be happy with how specific she was.
Maggie, however, had paused. Eyes narrowed at the two, caught in a thought.
“Maggie?” Mel whispered, “What did you see?”
The Brunette jolted, plastering a fake smile on her face, “Oh nothing! Just a trick of the light!”
Mel grabbed her arm once she returned closer to the group, “Pfft, trick of the light my ass, you saw something? What was it?”
“I honestly don’t know,” her eyebrows were furrowed in concentration, “It was something about how they said it. They said the some thing, yet one sounded right, and the other wrong?”
“But how is that possible?” Macy interject lowly, ever the logical person.
“I don’t know!” Maggie whined, arms flailing, “It just was!”
“We’ll don’t stress,” Mel soothed, “We definitely have something by now from other questions.”
“We definitely, do not, have something from any of these questions.” Harry muttered a few minutes later in a group huddle.
“Maggie,” he glanced at the youngest, “Were you able to get anything, you know, empath wise?”
Her gaze snapped to his, a bit of fire in her pupils, “Don’t you think I would have said something if I did?! It’s hard enough that their identical, but their emotions are too! The Cancellor apparently has the ability to copy someone completely! They know everything about the other, because they know it themselves!”
Mel gasped, realization hitting her in a flash, “Oh my god Mags, that’s it!”
Maggie looked confused, as did the rest of them, “What’s it? What did I say?”
“I can’t be something Abby already knows,” she explained carefully, in a deep whisper, “If it’s something she already knows, the Cancellor can immediately pick up on it. He has a copy of all her memories! It’s gotta be something she doesn’t know, or, Moreover, something we know that can get a honest reaction she doesn’t know she makes.”
“But that’s practically impossible!”
“Don’t say that Macy, it’s not impossible if your the girlfriend of Abigael Jameson-Caine!”
Mel pulled from the group, walking up to the two with a confident swagger.
Both, of course, seemed a bit taken aback by her bold demeanor.
“Ok Siamese freak from hell,” she grinned, cracking her knuckles, “Your in my court now, It’s my turn to ask the questions.”
“One of you is the woman I love, and the fact she’s currently having to take a quiz for her life is sickening, so that stokes the fire of hate I have for whoever is causing this. And once I find out who is it, I promise you will regret ever messing with us, and mi Cariño!”
Mel let her monologue be a distraction, gradually advancing forward as she spoke. Until she was directly in front of them.
“Now, it’s time for your final question.”
She stared them in their chocolate orbs, lingering over the right one. Mel couldn’t understand it, but she felt as if the righty was the true Abby. Even with no proof. Their was just something in her eyes.
“Can you kindly hold you hands like this?”
The Latina then proceeded to hold one hand up, baring the wrist, the other slightly bellow, pressing on a very specific patch of skin.
The two were confused, both tilting their heads to the side slightly, in a way Abby would commonly do when she was thinking.
Mel let her hands drop to her sides, watching like a hawk as the complied. She could feel the groups eyes on her, and was desperately praying that this worked.
A few seconds passed. Nothing happened. Perfectly identical.
Then, it happened. The Abby on the right legs swiftly crumpled.
Mel rushed in, and in one move, caught Abby with one arm. The other, which had been hidden from sight, stabbing the duplicate with a quickly formed air icicle.
The demon gave a feral screech from the weapon embedded in its chest, clawing at it weakly.
The group watched in awe as it switched between numerous forms, one which of was lil n’as, the others it’s countless victims.
“How?” It gasped hoarsely, “I’m completely identical.”
“That’s where your wrong!” Mel smiled proudly, “You see, in a way, you were identical. You knew everything Abby did because you could copy her mind! But what about something she didn’t even know of? Like the fact that from years of being put in shock cuffs consequently damaged the nerve in her right wrist? That when pressed, would cause her to pass out?”
“But how?” It wailed, “She would have known!”
“Except she didn’t!” The Latina cradled the unconscious body gently, kissing Abbys crown lightly, “I only found out by accident. And she didn’t remember a thing about it when waking up. I didn’t want to worry her, so I just stayed quiet. I soon understood why it happened due to her trial. But as a demon who can only copy what the person knows, you wouldn’t have.”
The creature let out a few more pitiful whines before crumpling to ash and dust.
“MEL!” Maggie shrieked in happiness, giving her a gigantic hug, “That was AMAZING! How did you figure it out?!”
“Just by what you said,” she answered honestly,” Their emotions were the same, and physically they were too. But the body is an amazing thing, and it does many things were not even aware of!”
“That is factually correct!” Macy complimented with a smile.
“I suppose this calls for a celebration when we get home, err, when do you think she’ll wake up?” Harry gestured to the peacefully resting girl.
The lesbian grinned softly, “Oh, any moment now. It only knocks her out for a minute or two.”
“Oh!” Maggie perked up, “I just remembered what I noticed about her response!”
Everyone stared with great interest.
The youngest smiled, “Abby called Parker ‘Brother’. Even though he’s only half related, she always adressed him as her brother. I guess the clone thought we wanted more specific.”
“She truly is just that amazing.” Mel noted warmly, lips parting when she felt Abby starting to stir.
The group took this as their key to leave, telling Mel to meet them back in the other room.
She nodded, expression soft when Abigaels eyes fluttered open.
“W-what happened? D-id we do it? Is it gone?”
“Gone Cariño,” Mel cooed, smoothing the stray hairs off her face and stroking her forehead just the way she liked, “All thanks to you my love.”
“Me?” Abigael questioned, “What did I do? All I remember is, ugh, I have a killer headache, I just remember doing some weird hand signs and then darkness?”
“Oh my love, you were yourself! Undeniably, and amazingly yourself. And no Lil N’as, fancy identity stealer could ever imitate you perfectly. For theirs only one of you. And for that, I am greatful.”
“Why?” Abby arched an eyebrow, smiling erotically, “Because I’m too hot to handle?”
Mel scoffed, chuckling despite herself, nearly dropping her girlfriend in the process.
“More like because i can barely tolerate one of your personality!”
The Britt pouted slightly, “Your mean.”
“Oh am I?” She leaned in and kissed her pouty lips, “No but actually? It’s because I’m reminded to never take you for granted. I only get one of you. And it be the worst mistake of my life to waste it.”
Abbys lips turned to a fond smile, “And their you go again, making me feel things and generally be a better happier person.”
“Oh the audacity of myself!” The witch smirked.
“Ugh, I hate you!”
She grinned, “Love you too.”
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Text
Secrets and Seduction (Tammy x Reader)
Summary: You’re asked last minute to babysit for Tammy when some unplanned events take place which leads to an even more unexpected situation. You’re long awaited dream is about to become a reality.
Words: 3,348
Warnings: NSFW (just cunnilingus)
Author’s note: I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. This is my first shot at writing anything smut related so please comment or message me any feedback! It’s much appreciated!!! Also I just wanted to extend a thank you to everyone who liked/reblogged Confessions with Cordelia, it really means a lot. I’m done talking now, enjoy darlings! Mwah!
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It was Saturday afternoon when you received a text from the docile blonde who was secretly the subject of most of your thoughts these days. You knew it was wrong especially since you were quite a bit younger than her however, ever since Tammy’s inconsiderate asshole of a husband left, you couldn’t get her off your mind.
Hey Y/N, I know that it’s last minute but I just got a called in. Would you be willing to babysit Keri tonight?  
Of course, Tam Tam, I’d love to! What time do you need me? Even though you shouldn’t your mind drifted to other situations where she may need you but you shook it off before hitting send.  
Oh Y/N, are you sure it’s not an inconvenience? I don’t want to cut into any plans you may have!
C’mon Tam Tam, you know I never have plans and even if I did, I’d gladly drop them to help you out. :)  
Well as long as you’re sure. Could you get here by 4:00?  
Done and done! See you then! :)
You looked at the time...3:00. An hour to get ready, you had to look nice in front of Tammy even if it was only for a little bit. You went up and grabbed your favorite burgundy dress as your mind reminded you that Tammy complimented it the one time she saw you wear it. It had sheer lace quarter length sleeves and fell to just about the knees. You brush your knotted Y/H/C mane before adding some winged black liner and mascara. You completed the makeup with some deep reddish-brown matte lipstick. Before exiting and heading out into the fall air, you throw your black pea coat and flats on.
When you arrived, you noticed the blonde carrying heavy duffel bags to the trunk of the car to which you rush over to take a couple from her hands. Tammy releases a sigh of relief before heaving the bags into the trunk with a loud thump. She was breathing heavily from the exertion; her hair was slightly tousled from sweat and trying to rush around yet she still looked breathtaking as always. You felt your mouth go dry as your mind started wandering to other moments when she would look like this.  
“Y/N? Y/N!” Tammy shouts snapping you out of your daydream. Her hand coming to rest on your shoulder, the touch gives off heat so intense you feel it through your rather thick coat. “Are you alright sweetheart?”  
“Y-yeah Tam Tam, I’m sorry I was just thinking, you know how I get.” A nervous laugh escapes your mouth making her giggle. Her hand giving your shoulder a squeeze before releasing it, she opened her mouth like she had something to say but was interrupted by her cell phone ringing.  
“Yes...yes. I’m leaving now Lou, see you in a bit. Bye.”  
You tense up when you hear Lou’s name leave the beautiful woman’s lips. You knew they worked together, granted you didn’t know what they did for work but early on you decided that was none of your business. If Tammy was happy you weren’t going to pry. Lou was at a party that Tammy had once, she seemed really nice nevertheless you had a sense of distaste towards the other blonde when you realized she was rather handsy. This fact too was none of your business since Tammy was not yours to claim but you couldn’t help being bitten by envy. It wasn’t known if the mother was interested in women yet if she was your mind knew that Lou would have a way better shot than you would, it hurt. The blonde shut the trunk before giving you a quick hug.  
“Thanks, so much Y/N, I owe you breakfast. Stay the night if you don’t have any plans tomorrow. I’ll see you later tonight!”  
“See you!” You yell back as she drives off with the window down waving at you.  
It was about 7:30 and you had put Keri to bed after your hours of making food for you both, painting her nails and dancing around ridiculously around the living room. The little girl was so adorable that you could never be upset when she was around. As you stood in the doorway watching her little form sleep for a minute before switching off the light your mind flashed back to a time six months into babysitting the little cutie. It was a night you just happened to hang out at the house because Tammy invited you for dinner as a thank you for your help.
“Looks like someone was sleepy.” You whispered to Tammy in the kitchen, pointing to the little girl’s body passed out across the couch. The gentle mother came in bending down to pick her daughter up, you stuck your arm out to stop her. “I got her.”  
You carried her up to her room, while Tammy finished up the last dish that was in the sink from dinner. Carefully you made it up the stairs into the girl’s room to tuck her sleeping form in, she stirred a bit as you told her goodnight and kissed her forehead.  
“Goodnight, love you Y/N.” The girl mumbled sleepily before turning over to continue sleeping.  
Your eyes were wide and your heart swelled. It was the sweetest thing ever, you realized Tammy thought so as well because when you got to the doorway she was standing off to the side. A beaming white smile lit up her face and a single tear was rolling down her cheek. You look to her with furrowed brows as if to ask ‘are you okay?’. As if reading your mind, she wiped the tear away and nodded smiling even wider before you both headed back downstairs.  
Just to give Tammy an update you texted her real quick to tell her Keri was asleep in her bed. After an hour passed with still no sign of the older woman so you snuggled up on the couch and switched-on Netflix and decided to watch Carol. It was one of your favorites and since the older woman was running late you figured there was no harm, she probably wouldn’t be back for a couple hours. Before the movie even started you heard the front door open and you frantically searched for the remote. Where in the hell did you put the remote? It was too late to change it, Tammy was already in the door, kicking off her shoes and walking over to you by the time you found the controller and were only able to pause the movie. The blonde doesn’t pay much attention to your frantic actions and proceeds to enter the kitchen while apologizing for being late and not being able to text you with a time frame like she usually did.  
“It’s okay. I know you get busy.” You say shrugging.  
“Would you like to have a drink with me? It’s been a long night.” Clinking of glasses came from the kitchen and you get up to join her, this wasn’t the first time you’d joined her for a glass of wine or two.
“Sure!”  
Tammy caught sight of your outfit for the first time that night as it was previously covered up by your coat on your arrival. Her mouth went dry as she took in your appearance and she was mesmerized, wine glasses all but forgotten for the moment.  
“Tam Tam...Tammy the wine!” You say louder to get her attention as the red liquid continued to overflow the glass making it spill onto the counter top.  
She looked down; eyes wide as she said ‘shit’ under her breath. You rushed over and grabbed the roll of paper towels that she was frantically looking for. After you were both done cleaning up the mess, she looked up at you with flushed cheeks, wiping the sweat from her palms on her shirt. “You look lovely Y/N.”  
It was your time to blush while avoiding her gaze as you thanked her quietly. She offers you the glass that she didn’t overflow while she herself bent down to the glass and slurped the liquid from the rim of the glass until it was low enough to pick up and carry to the living room. With the remote in hand, you were getting ready to quickly switch Carol off until she interrupted you.  
“I’d love to watch a movie. What were you going to watch?”  
Your cheeks get hot once again. “Carol. We don’t have to watch that though we can watch whatever you want.”  
She seems to ponder the title while she sets her glass down on the coffee table. “Oh, I’ve never heard of that movie I’d love to watch it! Go ahead and start it up and I’ll make us some popcorn, how does that sound?”  
Like I’m going to want to crawl into a hole to wallow in my embarrassment. You thought.
“Sounds great!”  
The movie starts playing and you practically shove popcorn in your mouth with every Therese and Carol scene. The next time you try to reach into the bowl you were shocked to feel soft skin against yours, you both pull your hands back slightly before taking turns grabbing more popcorn. After Tammy’s second glass of wine was gone you noticed she sat down closer to you on the couch now right up against your side actually now that the popcorn was gone. The bowl forgotten on the coffee table along with your finished glasses. You were relieved that the wine had helped you relax a bit, the blonde hadn’t seemed to mention anything about the two women interacting on screen which you took as a good sign. The perfume scene was now playing on the screen and you swallowed hard still a little nervous that the woman beside you will question you or comment. Instead, you feel a soft hand land on your knee before she copied Therese from the film, leaning in and nuzzling her nose into the side of your neck under your ear. She breathes in your perfume; it was her favorite you guessed since she typically always commented you when you wore the fruity scent.  
“Hmm...you always smell so wonderful Y/N.” Tammy whispers.  
Thankfully she turns her head and continues watching the movie that is until the Waterloo scene comes on making you shift in your seat a bit. You’re watching a lesbian sex scene with your very straight crush! How could you not squirm? Why did you agree to watch this with her you idiot? Because you can’t say no to her the other side of your brain rationalizes. With the internal questions reeling in your head, you don’t realize that Tammy’s face got closer again until you hear her speak.  
“Are you getting a little hot and bothered sweetheart?” She purrs in your ear making you shiver at the low octave of her voice. “I see the way you look at me Y/N. Do you think about me sweetheart?”  
You swallowed hard and your body betrays you by shivering again by the words being whispering in your ear. The light graze of unbelievably soft lips against your ear lobe.  
“Yes.” You breathe out.  
“Look at me Y/N,” You do as she says, her expression absolutely serious, “if you feel uncomfortable tell me okay?”
You quickly nod your head. This brings a smile to the blonde’s face before she brushes a piece of your Y/H/C hair behind your ear, her thumb caresses your cheek. You subconsciously lean into the touch and release a huge breath that you didn’t realize you were holding. Soft lips ghost over your own testing the waters before coming back for more with more pressure making you moan. You allow your hands to get buried in the golden tresses that you’ve longed so many times to touch bringing her closer to you as you kiss her with the same amount of enthusiasm as she did. Your lips trail along her jawbone to her neck where you kiss and nibble here, a mixture of gasps and moans leave her lips sending heat straight to your core. However, intruding thoughts pushes forward...what about your friendship? Why you? You pull back to look at her.  
“I-I’ve wanted this for so long Tam Tam...are you sure you want me? Y-you don’t want Lou?”  
In response she turns away from you, your stomach sinking for a minute regretting the questions that flowed from your lips until you see she undid her button of her pants.  
“First of all, Lou is with Debbie and no I do not want Lou. Come here Y/N.”  
You move closer to her on the couch until you are right beside her; your knees bumping her legs. She gently grasps your wrist and brings it into the waistband of her pants to cup her core through her underwear. Her thoroughly soaked underwear. You gasp shocked not only at the gesture but also at the fact that she was so wet, another shot of heat goes directly to your own core which you were sure was just as wet as hers. You move your fingers over her core just barely touching, she releases a small moan and grinds into your hand for more pressure.  
“Is that what I do to you?”  
She nods biting her lip and grinding into your hand once more. To Tammy’s dismay you remove your hand before kissing her again, your hands grab the hem of her shirt pulling it off and tossing it aside. If you were being honest you expected nude-colored undergarments, not that you minded because either way this is what you’ve wanted for so long. The subject of your dreams, and fantasies just...Tammy. You were pleasantly surprised to find that her bra was a dusted pink color that looked so beautiful against her pale skin. In an instant after drinking in the sight before you, your lips are all over her pale skin. First her lips, then her neck, from there your lips are everywhere...her collarbone, licking at the parts of exposed breasts that weren’t confined by the bra. Tammy arches her back to which you take this opportunity to reach around and unhook the material, tossing that aside to lay with her discarded shirt.  
Tammy watched in awe as she watched your Y/E/C eyes darken in lust before she felt your soft hands caress her perfectly sized B cup breasts. Just the right size to perfectly fit in your warm hands. She gasped when she felt your tongue flick against her nipple before taking her breast into your mouth, sucking on it before releasing it with a pop. All the while shimmying out of her pants as your hands made quick work of simultaneously pulling them down your hips. The blonde’s honey brown eyes met yours, the desire in them matching yours.  
“Y/N, you are wearing too many clothes sweetheart.”  
The words come out in heavy rasps and you realized you could get used to making Tammy breathless.  
“Can you help me out of them Tam Tam?” You ask with the same rasp to your voice.  
“I thought you’d never ask.” She leans towards you as you turned around for her to unzip your dress. As she did so you felt the coolness of her knuckles pass over the skin of your back causing you to shudder and gasp. The older woman’s mouth found the same spot and slowly kissed from your shoulder blades up to the side of your neck, prior to slowly dragging the top half of your dress over your shoulders and down to your hips. Her hands drag along the same path afterwards it felt like heaven, it was too good to be real. You needed confirmation as her lips then followed the path, she was everywhere.  
“Tell me I’m not dreaming. Tell me this is real.” You breathe out, craning your neck to the left side to give those wonderful lips better access to your pulse point. A nibble to that exact spot made you moan deep in the back of your throat.  
“Oh, Y/N this is very real. Stand up please I need to see you.”  
Tammy watches with hungry eyes as you do what she says and remove your dress revealing your black bra and panties. The primal look in those honey brown eyes is something you had never seen before however; it was definitely something you wanted to see more of. Her hands grab your hips gently and pull you towards her still seated form on the couch, her long slender fingers hook in either side of the waistband of your panties then slowly peeled the fabric down your legs. The older woman noticed your fingers fidget nervously at your sides as if wanting to cover up, which makes her take action by moving to the edge of the cushion and placing a kiss to the skin above your mound.  
The older woman scoots down the couch and lays back flat against the cushions then politely instructing you to straddle her hips. You follow her instructions of then removing your bra and easily follow as her hands press into your back causing your torso to lean forward. Her hands and mouth find your breasts sucking, kissing, and touching the ache in your core grew stronger to the point where you could barely stand it. Tammy must’ve felt your arousal against her hip bone because she grinded her hips up and moaned.  
“Come up here please sweetheart.” It took you a second to realize what her words were meaning exactly until your brain processed exactly where she wanted you. You were still hesitant though, no one had ever done that for you what if you didn’t smell or taste good. Tammy’s hands grabbed both of yours intertwining your fingers, the action made your stomach flutter. “Do you trust me?”  
You instantly nod. You trusted Tammy more than a lot of people in your life. This made you feel confident enough to let go of hands and climb your way up her body finding your balance on your knees straddling the beautiful woman’s face. A kiss is placed against your clit making you jump slightly. Within seconds you felt the older woman’s tongue on your pussy swiping through your folds before coming to suck on your clit. Your legs started to quiver but then you whimper in disappointment when you feel the lips release the sensitive bud.  
“Tammy.” You whine.
“Not yet.” You hear her mutter softly.
“Tammy please.” You whine again this time looking directly into her eyes. This is her weak spot, just like you, she never wanted to deny you anything.  
“Just remember you need to be quiet. Can you do that?”  
“Y-yes...yes just please Tam Tam, let me cum for you.”  
A moan leaves the beautiful lips below you before you feel the long thick tongue attacking your pussy again swiping through your lips once again before entering slowly into your soaking wet core. You had to bite your lip hard in between your teeth to keep your moans and screams at bay, her tongue was so talented as it filled you and hit the sensitive spot inside your walls. Fingers started rubbing your clit in quick, tiny circles, you looked down at her with your mouth open wanting to scream but thankfully no words escaped. Your Y/E/C eyes met hers and that was your undoing. Your thighs spasmed, pussy walls clenching against the warm, talented tongue belonging to the most beautiful woman. It was the most intense orgasm you’d ever had.  
Tammy quickly cleaned up every drop of your arousal moaning at the taste until you came down from your high. Moments later you laid there for a moment in each other's arms breathing heavily, feeling her fingers draw little patterns on your back.  
“Can I taste you Tam Tam?” You asked quietly.  
She smiled like a cat that caught a canary and kissed you passionately before sitting up.  
“Grab the clothes and follow me upstairs sweetheart.”  
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ghost-light · 3 years
Text
we rot, thinkin' lots about nothing
My contribution for Pride Day of @willieappreciationweek!!!
Summary:
Their gender- hm.
It was sort of like gender envy. Except remove the envy part. Because sure, ghosts could have gender. But it wasn’t really the gender he wanted. Stuck with it. Just like they were stuck in the afterlife, if you could call ghosthood an afterlife.
Read it under the cut or on ao3
To be fair, ghosts had never really needed a specific gender.
They still didn’t, at least not by any standards or official rules (spoiler alert; that’s because there were no definitive rules. The closest ones Willie had ever known to be rules were smashed to smithereens by Caleb Covington and Alex's band).
So when Julie asked if they wanted a pride flag or pin, it threw him off. When Julie showed them some pictures of pride flags for different gender identities, it threw them off. Hence the mini-spiral of skateboarding and maybe avoiding a certain band of ghosts and their lead singer.
It wasn’t hiding, per se. Willie Williamson Ortega didn’t hide. There was nothing to hide from, anyways. And yet, here he was, skating the day away, stuck in their own head with a problem that wouldn’t resolve itself.
He never had a label before. They were just a gay skater in the 80’s. He was just Willie, or William, to Caleb.
It didn’t feel quite right anymore.
The thing was, Willie's gender just was. They were a ghost. Couldn’t that be their gender?
(Agender, Flynn had suggested. Not having a particular gender. But that wasn’t quite right. He did have a gender. Probably.)
Willie tried explaining it to Alex, because he was a ghost too, right? Except… not quite in the sense that Willie was. Alex tried, he really did. But seeing the blonde’s encouraging but confused smile, and the way Alex’s eyebrows furrowed with intense concentration sank Willie’s spirits.
Flynn was a little more understanding. But they had found a label, was comfortable calling herself a demigirl lesbian. Demiboy and gay felt- close. Maybe. He hadn’t thought about these things so urgently before, hadn’t been able to find people that could truly get the situation. After seeing his look of distress, and the way their hands repeatedly combed through their hair, Flynn’s face softened. They put down their phone, still keeping a half-casual air. Adjusted their hat (where did Flynn get so many hats?).
“You know,” she paused. Exhaled slowly. “You know, gender is more like a concept. Like- my gender is basically a lesbian, yeah? It doesn’t make sense, but it makes sense to me. Some people call it a performance, but the point is that it shouldn’t define you. If you don’t find a label that you like, who cares, dude? If anyone gives you crap for it, hit them with your skateboard.”
The last line startled a laugh out of Willie, their shoulders relaxing ever so slightly. “I, uh, yeah. I’ll keep that in mind. You’re-you’re pretty great at this stuff.”
Flynn smirked, tilting their head to the side. “I know. Now go get ready for your,” she wiggled her eyebrows a bit, “date with blondie. And I am off to catch my demon of a girlfriend’s dance rehearsal.” Their eyes sparked at the word “girlfriend”, and Willie couldn’t help but grin back.
“Not a date!” he called out. “Not- it’s not a date. It’s just movie night with Alex. And Luke and Reggie and Julie. See? Not a date.” Willie was fumbling with their words, meaning he was probably blushing hard too.
“Mhmm.” Flynn looked bemused, shaking her head a little. “Have fun on your not-a-date-ghost-party-plus-my-best-friend then, skater boy.”
Okay, so Flynn had been helpful. That wouldn’t explain why Willie still felt lost, though considerably less so than before.
Their gender- hm.
It was sort of like gender envy. Except remove the envy part. Because sure, ghosts could have gender. But it wasn’t really the gender he wanted. Stuck with it. Just like they were stuck in the afterlife, if you could call ghosthood an afterlife.
So gender envy without the envy. And it was still unclear if “ghost” was a real-enough gender, or if Willie was making it all up. So that took away from the metaphor quite a bit. Gender envy, but without the envy. Oh, and scrap the gender too. Nice metaphor, Ortega. You’re really making progress here.
It’s ok. Everything’s fine. Willie isn’t the least bit concerned. He didn’t need a label, honestly. So why did they feel like they needed one so badly? Nobody was going to care, Julie certainly wouldn’t mind regardless of the answer she got. (If Willie was being honest, it wasn’t really about Julie.)
Didn’t Willie figure this out when they were alive? Skaters didn’t need a gender. Skating was what defined them, not a gender identity label or their sexuality. Skating was the one thing that made them feel free and alive. And then they died, of course. That didn’t mean they couldn’t still skate, though. And yes, maybe he couldn’t really feel the wind in their hair as he rushed down Hollywood Boulevard, and as much fun as phasing straight through lifers was, it did only emphasize the fact that he was a ghost. Not real.
If Willie themself wasn’t real, then why should their gender have to be real? It was barely a significant part of them, anyways.
In all seriousness, he did have an idea of why Julie’s simple question was affecting them so much. Nobody had ever asked them that before. For years, decades, Willie had simply. Been. Willie Williamson Ortega, ghost skater at the Hollywood Ghost Club.
It hadn’t occurred to him just how much they didn’t feel like a person during that time. Skating was wonderful, of course. Their only true escape from the strange hodge-podge of Caleb’s talent show. It was Caleb that was the problem, Caleb that had been leeching off Willie’s being the whole time.
And then, he was alive again. Willie, that was. Not Caleb. Alex brought Willie back to life, and wasn’t that just ironic? Because Willie was so, so alive in ways that they had never been before. And all while he was dead, to top it off.
And the craziest part about it was-
And then their board rammed into someone, sending both parties to the ground in a groaning heap.
“Ah damn, I am so sorry, I- Reggie??” This was great. Another one of the band members that they ran over with a skateboard. Alex was never going to let him live this down. At least they weren’t obsessing more over the board than the person. (Although, Willie had done a quick check of his board, which seemed unharmed.)
“Man, I just wanted to go for a walk, not get turned into roadkill,” Reggie laughed, sitting up cautiously.
“I’m so sorry dude, I wasn’t paying a whole lot of attention. Honestly, I was kinda having a minor afterlife crisis, as Alex would say.” He doesn’t know why he said that, doesn’t know what it is about Reggie that made them suddenly willing to stick around instead of apologize and skate off.
“Minor afterlife crisis, huh?” Reggie raised their eyebrows, hands propped up on his knees. “I mean, the afterlife is weird. Luke poofed my shirt away the first time we teleported! And Alex still gets wedgies, even though all our clothes are made of air!” Willie glanced at him, checking if he was serious or not. It was hard to tell, with Reggie’s earnest-puppy-dog confused face.
Willie inhaled deeply, sighing as they sat down. “Yeah. You know, I don’t think I’ve felt this alive, with Alex and you guys and Julie, since like, I died. And then Julie was asking about pride, and I can’t quite figure out what my gender identity is. It’s kinda…” His voice trailed off, unsure of what to say.
“Like you just are, but in a different way than everyone else.” Reggie murmured, eyes downcast.
Willie’s eyes snapped to Reggie. “Yeah! Exactly. You know that feeling? Because you just are, but nobody can understand that. I’m alive like I haven’t been in forever, and I can’t. Can’t put a name to myself anymore.”
Reggie nodded enthusiastically. “Luke keeps saying that maybe I’m like him. But I think he’s wrong. I used to wear skirts to our band performances. They were just fun to stomp and jump around on stage with. Nobody asks me, but if they did, I would say my gender’s like that. I’ll do it if it makes me feel good, but not because of labels.”
It was as simple as that. Willie took a breath, felt it sink into his bones and settle there. Simple. As. That. They’d been so busy worrying over finding a proper label. And truly, it wasn’t such a big deal.
Beside them, Reggie was still talking. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we’re ghosts. We can pretty much do anything. Skating makes you feel more you, right? You say that a lot. Skateboarding, that’s enough to be an identity, gender or not. My sister used to say, when our parents would get mad at me for wearing skirts or makeup, that it didn’t matter. Because I would always be me, you know?”
“Yeah. Yeah. I’m always going to be me. Thank you, Reggie. I think you solved my minor afterlife crisis for me.” Skateboarding is a part of me. I can be a skater. I can be a ghost. I don’t need any other labels than that.
Except maybe Alex’s boyfriend. Or spouse. No! Stop thinking that much ahead, you haven’t even asked him out yet, Ortega! Focus on right now.
“Nah, it was all you. You knew it, you just needed to hear it again.” They grinned, green eyes sparkling in light of the setting sun. Willie huffed out a laugh, offering a fist. Reggie tapped his fist against Willie’s, not hesitating for a moment.
When Alex met Willie’s gaze, all he could see was happiness.
“Everything okay?” He asked, already knowing the answer that would come.
“Yeah. Reggie helped me figure some things out. And I’m still me. Just Willie.” They smiled, reaching out for Alex’s hand.
“Well, Just Willie, I hope you’re ready for Friday movie night. Luke picked A New Hope,” he leaned in and stage whispered, “for the seven hundredth time.”
Luke protested from across the couch, standing up to make his point.
“It’s a good movie, but we’ve all memorized the script at this point, Lucas.” Alex shot back, squeezing Willie’s hand slightly.
Willie leaned back, eyes fond as he took in the scene. Luke and Alex bickering loudly over who had the better movie choices, Julie laughing, exasperated as she bent over to paint Reggie’s nails a pale purple.
Definitely the most alive they had felt in a long time.
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monaownsmyass · 4 years
Text
From Homecoming to Coming Home
Book: My Two First Loves, Chapters 35-38
Pairing: Ava Lawrence x MC (Emma Price)
Genre: Fluff? Fluff. Yeah, fluff
Rating: G, None
Word count: 3,244 (I may have gotten carried away)
A/N: Homecoming but make it Ava’s PoV since we missed most of it and MTFL is on hiatus. Also, I’m dead tired and didn’t proofread so it might be a little messy, sorry.
This was it. Today was the day. No more running, no more hiding, no more denying. I had to break up with Chad. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly as I looked at myself in the mirror, my reflection staring back at me in my homecoming dress. I couldn't help but think, 'Would she think I look pretty?'.
I shook the thought out of my head before touching up my make up, wanting it to look as flawless as possible. I couldn't lie to myself anymore, I knew who I was trying to impress.
With my heart hammering out of my chest, I walked downstairs and was greeted by my parents.
"Oh, honey! You look wonderful!"
"Thank you, I'll see you guys later, love you."
"We love you too!"
Honestly, the whole exchange with my parents was a blur, I couldn't focus with all the thoughts running through my head. My anxiety was off the charts.
Am I really doing this?
I stepped into my sedan and made my way to school, thinking about everything that has happened lately. I felt bad for stringing Chad along, he was a decent enough guy but he wasn't the one I wanted. None of the boys I've been with were the ones I wanted. I always thought it was just because I haven't found 'the one' yet. I thought every girl felt like it until I overheard a few girls from cheer talking about their boyfriends and crushes. About how great it felt from just holding hands to making out. I never understood that.
But I think I do now. I know why now.
When I started dating Mason, I thought he was going to be my Mr. Perfect. He was the school's golden boy, what more could a girl ask for? I may have been a little reluctant when I asked him out but I figured I would be all over him as things went on. It didn't turn out that way. I found myself making excuses to avoid hanging out with him and every public display of affection felt more like a chore than something I wanted to do to show that I cared for him.
It didn't take me long after that to realise that my Mr. Perfect would actually be Ms. Perfect.
Emma has been my best friend since freshman year. I've always thought she looked beautiful and had a personality to match on the inside. I knew she thought I was the one that got all the boys' attention, but if only she knew she's had mine since day one. I would always get excited by the smallest things when it came to her. Something as little as a good morning text to a smile when she spotted me in the school hallway would never fail to make my day.
At first I thought it was because I've never had a best friend before. I never had anyone have my back the way she does. But whenever I saw her with Mason, it made me jealous so I thought it was because I liked Mason which was why I even asked him out in the first place.
It didn't become apparent until I started dating boys that I had it completely wrong. I guess you can imagine my confusion when I realised the feelings I was suppose to be getting from the guy I was dating was coming from my best friend instead.
I brushed it off, not wanting to even think about the possibility that I might like girls instead of guys, coming up with all sorts of reasons to avoid the inevitable reality.
The first day back to school, when I had to pick up Emma, that was the day I started really questioning myself. She looked ethereal walking down her driveway as she made her way to my car. The sunlight caught the highlights in her hair and hit her skin in a way that made her seem as if she was glowing. An angel walking among humans. My heart dropped to my stomach, partly at the revelation but mostly at the sight.
It wasn't until tonight that I finally accepted what I've been dreading for the past few months. I finally decided to embrace who I am and stop denying my feelings because everything finally made sense. Up to that very moment, when I was in the car, driving to homecoming, I've never said it aloud, but it was time.
I stopped at the red light and looked at myself in the mirror as I whispered, "I'm a lesbian." Immediately felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulder. I left out a shaky laugh as a tear rolled down my cheek. I felt free.
The word 'lesbian' used to make me flinch. It was never directed at me but it always felt like a slap in the face. It was always thrown around as a derogatory word, an insult, it was dirty and tainted. But I now know it wasn't true because the feelings I'm experiencing, the love I felt, it was pure. It's the purest thing I've known.
I didn't even realise I arrived until I was in the school parking lot. I parked my car and met Chad outside the gym. He did a double take when he saw me.
"You look gorgeous!"
I smiled at him politely in reply as we entered the building. He wasn't the one I wanted that reaction from. He wasn't the one I wanted to hear that from.
I knew I had to breakup with him tonight, I couldn't keep dragging him along like this but I just didn't know if I could. Then, I saw Emma and every doubt I had was resolved. I couldn't do this any longer, I had to call it quits as soon as I got the chance. She looked absolutely radiant. Her blue dress had a plunging neckline and was covered in sequins that glittered despite the dim lighting of the venue. It made her stand out in the crowd in a way that was absolutely captivating.
She was absolutely captivating.
My breath hitched as she caught my eye. We held glances before her eyes traveled down to my outfit. She slowly raked her eyes back up to meet mine. It may have been my imagination, but I saw her eyes widen a little and she looked slightly flustered. I smiled at her, my heart racing as I felt the butterflies in my stomach begin to flutter.
The moment didn't last long before I noticed who was standing beside her. Right, Noah was her date tonight. I couldn't help but feel disappointed that it wasn't me on her arm.
Completely forgetting that Chad was with me, he tapped me on the shoulder as I reluctantly tore my gaze away from Emma.
"Let's dance."
I gingerly accepted his outstretched hand before he lead me to the dance floor. I placed my arms around his neck, careful to leave some space between us while her held my waist. I looked around to see where Emma went and spotted her a few feet away from us. Their arms were wrapped securely around each other as her cheek rested against his chest.
A pang of envy and forlorn hit me hard in the chest. The things I'd do just to be in Noah's place. I had to remind myself I was in no place to feel this way. This is what Emma wanted, I had to respect that no matter how much it hurt. Noah's a good guy, I know he'll take care of her. That's all a best friend could ask for.
As if she could sense me looking at her, she looked straight into my eyes. Once she saw me staring, she lifted her head off of his chest and pulled back away from him slightly. A part of me leapt in bliss but the other, bigger part of me knew not to get my hopes up.
For the rest of the dance, Emma and I stole glances at each other, careful to keep distance between our respective dates. I couldn't help but wish that she'd come up to me and ask for a dance. The intensity of our gaze only became stronger the longer it went on.
In that instance, I wanted nothing more than to walk up to her and kiss her.
I watched as Noah whispered something into Emma's ear and lead her out of the gym. That jealousy I've been suppressing rose again and I knew it was time to call it quits with Chad.
I spoke over the loud music, asking him to follow me. I brought him up to the rooftop, knowing we won't be disturbed here while everyone was at the dance.
"Chad, I have to be honest with you, I think we should break up."
"What?"
"I'm sorry, I just don't think it will work out," I elaborated.
"Why not?"
"Because... It's hard to explained. I... I've figured some things out about myself," I said cautiously.
"Is it Mason? Be honest, was he a better kisser?" He looked crestfallen.
"It's not that. Even with Mason, I've never felt... Never mind," I sighed.
Perplexed, he spoke, "I don't get it."
"Chad," This was harder than I thought it was going to be but keeping Emma's face in mind, I pushed through. "We both deserve to be someone's first choice. And I know you're not mine."
"What's that supposed to mean? If not Mason then who?"
Emma Price.
"I'm sorry, but we're done."
I turned to go back to down to the dance, leaving him alone on the rooftop.
I hung around the dance for a short while, mingling with my cheer squad and a few friends even though I was in low spirits. I was hoping to catch Emma but I haven't seen her since I saw her leave with Noah. Defeated, I decided to go back home.
As I was pulling out of the parking area, I saw her. The girl that made me question everything, the girl I could always count on, the girl that commanded the room even without realising, my best friend.
My first love.
She looked as sad as I felt. I rolled down my window and asked, "Need a ride?"
"Am I that obvious?"
"To me? Always," I joked. "Get in, loser."
We drove in silence but from the corner of my eye, I could see her trying to think of something to break it.
"Ava, I'm sorry about everything," she finally said, voice soft and slow.
Even just the tone of her voice was enough for my heartbeat to pick up.
Unsure how to respond, I replied, "Yeah... And I'm sorry about Mason and Noah. Sounds like a mess..." My voice started wavering at the end of the sentence, knowing I'm not one of her choices. I just hoped she didn't catch it.
"I know I shouldn't been leading both on, it's like I don't even know my own heart."
I exhaled loudly, "I know what that's like," I paused. "I... I think I've been lying to myself for a long time about who I am. About what I want."
I glanced at her again and she was looking at me intently. I continued, "And... and I need to be honest to you now too."
I saw her breath catch in her throat, as if she knew what I was about to confess.
"I thought once I started dating guys, I'd get what the whole fuss was about. But I realised... I realised I learnt something completely different."
We pulled up to her house and I placed my hand over hers. Heat spread from the tips of my fingers where we touched to my entire body. As I felt her soft, gentle hand under mine, my heart pounded when I looked up into her alluring brown eyes. I could stare at them forever.
This was it, I should tell her how I feel. My mind screamed, 'I like you!' but my mouth said, "I'll walk you out."I sighed.
We stepped out of the car and made our way down her driveway. I've walked this driveway countless of times over the past few years but something in the air tonight felt different. Hope. Longing. A magnetic pull between the two of us. I shot her a look and it was then I knew I wasn't making it up.
We stopped at her doorstep before facing her and for the first time, it felt like I was really looking at her. The moonlight illuminated her stunning face as I took in the heavenly sight of her standing before me. The slope of her nose, the softness of her cheeks, the way the light was reflecting off her eyes, making them shine and how her lips were slightly parted as she looked back at me. All at once, the realisation of how I've always been in love with her came crashing down on me. And I knew she was thinking the same.
I've never felt like this. It was startlingly thrilling.
I watch memories flash before her eyes as realisation dawn on her as well. I thought back to all those small memories we've shared together during the past few years. Sharing a milkshake, walking down the sidewalk with our arms linked, laughing at the dumb things we do together, dancing in her room like no one was watching, staying up to watch the sunrise together, falling asleep in each other's lap during movie nights, joking about ditching boys and dating each other instead. I thought I was joking at that time but I think a part of me deep down has always wished it was true.
It was these little moments that made me fall for Emma. It just took me some time to put it all together and understand that my feelings weren't shameful. No, it was divine.
Without realising, I whispered aloud, "I feel like, for the first time in a while... I finally get it... I see everything so clearly..."
Subconsciously, we both moved closer to each other. We were so close, I could feel her soft breath tickle my skin. Her lips were only a few inches away from mine and if my heart we're to beat any faster, I'm sure I'd pass out.
She leaned in a little more closer and I swear I was dreaming... until she pulled back a bit, leaving me a little disappointed.
"Ava... I...," she struggled to find her words. "With Mason and Noah... I just..."
I took a slow step back and raised a hand to stop her.
"It's fine," I said with a rueful smile. I could feel my heart ache. "I understand, it's overwhelming." I took a deep breath and continued. "I just think you should know I really like you. Goodbye, Emma."
I turned back to head to my car when I felt her warm hand reached out to grab mine. The way her fingers laced through mine felt familiar and comforting. It was perfect.
I glanced at our intertwined fingers and back up into her eyes, looking sure. She knew what she wanted too.
She tugged me closer to her and the whole universe slowed down for us, as if making sure this was what we wanted before we did something we would regret. The way she was watching me made me feel as if I've finally been seen and we both knew no matter what would happen, how things would turn out, we'd always have this moment.
It felt like it took forever but when she finally crashed her lips against mine, everything sped back up in time with my heartbeat. Adrenaline coursed through our bodies as we clung on to each other, afraid we'd disappear into the oblivion we've created around us.
Years of longing and passion and mutual attraction was was poured into that kiss and for the first time in months, I finally felt alive. The way she wrapped an arm around my waist with the other hand gripping my hair gently made me understand what all those girls were always talking about. I get it now, I understood why people can't seem to keep their hands off of each other in the hallways because I never wanted this to end, it was wonderfully exhilarating, euphoric. It wasn't a myth, it was magic.
It was wasn't like how any of my other kisses with guys felt either. They were all forced, something I did just for the sake of it. I never liked the way their stubble beard scratched my skin or how their rough hands gripped my hips. The way their cologne filled up my nose always made me gag.
This kiss was nothing like that.
It was everything I imagined it would be and more.
Its the feeling you get when you're at the peak of the roller coaster, seconds before it drops or when you lean too far back on a chair and you think you're gonna fall. It's when your heart stops beating for a second and then it starts again it only for it to pump rapidly as if you've ran a marathon and you feel absolutely breathless. I felt like I was on fire.
I held her smooth cheeks in my palms as I kissed her desperately. 'This is how much I want you', the kiss conveyed, 'this is how long I've waited for you'. With all the passion in my body and soul, I kissed her as I got high off the scent of her perfume.
She was the first to break the kiss but I pulled her back into me, not wanting it to be over so soon. She was utterly intoxicating and I couldn't get enough of her.
She started giggling and that's when I pulled back.
"Have I mentioned how stunning you look tonight?" she asked with a small, infectious smile.
"You look pretty damn good yourself, Ms. Price," I laughed with her.
I embraced her tightly, and she reciprocated, the both of us just holding each other under the moonlight for a few minutes, listening to our breaths become even and stable once again.
"I'll see you tomorrow?" I whispered into her hair.
"That sounds amazing," she breath out.
After one last peck on the lips, I waited for Emma to enter her house, waving her goodbye. I made my way back to my car and just sat there for a moment, taking all of it in. I smiled to myself like an idiot, just sitting there while I replayed what just happened in my head. I was trying to control my heartbeat when I heard my phone go off. My heart rate picked up again as I saw it was from Emma.
'Also, I really like you too :)'.
My heart was so full, I thought it would burst in ecstasy.
I clutched my phone to my chest, smiling bigger than I thought possible when I heard it go off again.
'I can still see you outside, go home, weirdo :P'.
I let out a small laugh as I looked out my car window and into her bedroom's. I saw her smiling at me while shaking her head.
What she didn't know was she is my home. She has been for a while. Now it's time I try to become her's.
(More fics!)
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Note
Onyx tells Mc she’s pregnant. They hosts a party for everyone to announce of Onyx’s pregnancy. How they announce it and how everyone react are up to you!
Written by @evoedbd
WARNINGS Mentions of abuse Mentions of miscarriage Potentially offensive attempts at humor
Chanouncement
Cali was good with weird. Completely fine. The last year had seen her life absolutely flipped on its head. Perhaps rolled over by a truck, chopped up, tossed into a woodchipper, fed to gulls, shat out across the country… the picture was quite morbid.
Cali had foolishly thought her life couldn’t get any weirder. After all, she was dating the nicer of two near identical twins, who both so happened to be supernaturally selected demon slayers. The “evil” twin had turned Cali into a well of Supernatural energy and used said power to give the demons a massive level up. That wasn’t all, she’d also watched said twin, whilst possessed, gut Onyx, the love of her life and watched Onyx emerge a dragon. If that wasn’t unusual and morbid enough, Cali had literally shouted her romantic love at a literal dragon, who had once been her five-foot nothing girlfriend. Cali had been dating a literal dragon. In love with a literal dragon. That should have topped the weirdness charts. But no, Cali had then become the next Envy herself, and thus the only human bridge between a mod girl reincarnated into a brown bear, and her dead girlfriend. If that wasn’t enough, she’d been part of a ritual to bring her girlfriend back into human form, and to top it off, Cali discovered that her blood was the literal key to her girlfriend’s soul and destroying it. Nothing too serious. Just casual lesbian disaster stuff. Only, neither she nor Onyx were actually lesbians. Both of them appreciated men. In the sexy way. In the “Onyx had dated a man who abused her until her twin sister had gutted him like a pig and stolen his supernatural powers”, way. That kind of bisexual… no wonder some people were a little intimidated by the Queer community. Between U-Haul lesbians not checking for demon possession and world ending bisexuals, that was all pretty scary.
Though not as scary as what she and her lady love planned to do. As fate would have it, if fate was a wonderful arsehole conscious, Cali had been delivered a further dose of weirdness in her unusual life. Weirdness in the form of her formerly dragon, formerly dead girlfriend discovering she was pregnant under the potent influence of ritualistic magic, which had restored her human form. Given that these circumstances would have been terrifying for anybody, even without the added fact that she was now vulnerable for a demon demi-devil’s possession and the prime target of an apocalyptic plot, it made absolute sense that Onyx was anxious. Cali had been there, she understood how end of the world pressure like that could mess with a girl, which was why it was imperative to bring the team up to date on the latest development… and no, that was not a kidney, not yet. Onyx wasn’t that far along.
So far, the plan of a joyful distraction had gone off without a hitch. The common area was alive with laughter flowing from the Sin Troupe. Alcohol flowed relatively freely, along with several bowls and bags of typical party food such as potato chips and popcorn. The floor was already littered with crumbs, mostly from the boys throwing scraps at Wrath between rounds of charades. One thing Cali had learned tonight was that for a group that entertained for a living, a group also responsible for concealing the fact the world was woefully fucked from the general population, they were horrific actors. Now the money and tickets made sense, for even the most deluded of fans would surely notice the cracks if it was left to their acting skills alone.
“Shaving! Um, WHIPPED! Oh! BDSM KINK SHAMING!”
“Moron.”
“Darius… how did you even get that from dancing?”
“Oh? That’s what it is? I thought Wrath was possessed.”
“She’s Britney Spears. Cal’s her circus boy.”
“Well we aren’t all DJs here, Malakai. How was I supposed to get that from whatever she and Cal were doing?”
Cali didn’t tune into the words after that. She was back to anxious, or perhaps the woman tucked under her arm was. It was difficult to tell with the bond so active, causing the teeth marks on her shoulder to burn with the heat of a dragon’s love. Try as she might, she was caught between two violent sensations. The magic of the mark; memories of heat as playful nips had become a serious bite, a possessive one from a Dragon unlike the world had ever seen, or ever would. It wasn’t like anybody had seen Onyx as a dragon… except two sold out nights of the Sin Circus, a carnival ground and a shopping mall full of super excited fans and everyone online. Ok, that was a lot of people who’d seen Onyx as a dragon. That could be a problem. Which led to the anxiety. The type which made sweat prickle in all the uncomfortable places and her stomach do terrified flips. She wasn’t even the pregnant one. Onyx had to survive a pregnancy, targeting and contain a literal dragon’s soul.
All Cali had to do was make the statement that she had an announcement to make like a normal human being. She had to ignore the sweat trickling down her palms, tickling every crease, and how her heart skipped several beats in the past minute; rushing faster and faster until she could hear in her ears when she closed her eyes. Slower Blinks. She had to be normal.  Be normal. Be normal. Be normal.
All she had to do was make a single little announcement, that was admittedly life changing. It wasn’t like these people would judge. After all they were supernatural Demon assassins chosen by mystical powers based on the Seven Deadly Sins. If there was any group which were not judgemental it would surely be these people.
“I have channouncement to make.” she said with a rather high-pitched voice and a casual smile just a little too tight to be completely relaxed. In a room full of assassins she might as well have been waving a red flag saying terrified med school dropout alert. This was the time for the royal skill of fake it till you make it mixed with an impossibly large dose of denial. Anxious? Cali? Hah! No way. She had nailed it.
“What she means is we want to tell you something. Since we’re already playing charades, we want to try and see if you can guess.” Onyx chimed in, snuggling playfully under Cali’s arm. The mechanic grinned, letting her goofy affection conceal another wave of nerves. It was easier if she just stared at Onyx and let her face do what it would do. Give in to the muscles making her smile as she got lost in the most dazzling green eyes the world had ever seen. The dusting of blue eyeshadow really made those eyes pop, like emeralds offered to thieves on booby trapped pedestals. Hah, boobs! Cali liked those. Especially Onyx’s. No matter how Cali tried to avoid falling for the emerald trap, she found her gaze lingering, feasting on how the light shone across dark lashes and the rhinestone piercing just beneath Onyx’s right eye. It kept focus away from tender pink lips, from subtle little bites that portrayed a mix of excitement and nerves. Cali doubted the others would realise Onyx was anything other than playful. Afterall Onyx was a master of faking it until she made it, even to her closest friends. It showed in how loose her body was, how genuine her show stopping smile seemed. If Cali hadn’t felt the flickering within the bond, she may have bought Onyx’s act. That and the affection. How Onyx’s arm around her waist pulled that little bit too tight to be casual. Or how trimmed nails tried to dig into the grey fabric of Cali’s shirt; dragon talons clinging to the finest treasure. A scared girl seeking reassurance.
“Right. And to make it a team Envy experience, I’m going to tell Rip how to act.” Cali explained out loud, barely restraining her laughter as Ripley’s eagerness flooded her mind.
“Alright! I’m the best at charades! My acting is on point. Everyone thinks I’m a bear.”
Cali didn’t have the heart to tell Ripley that her “bear” act was entirely too adorable to be terrifying. Ripley may have the body of a bear, her soul, however, was still that of a tender human. Her soft eyes would strike terror into the hearts of the masses, along with her awkward attempts at snarls and finely groomed coat. Every gesture of her paws would see her painted pink claws drip sparkles, which admittedly might be horrifying to cishet folk. Ripley as always, was dressed for battle, wearing a fearsome checkered neck scarf, complete with an adorable little bow…truly, Ripley could intimidate the world into movies and cuddles. She could terrify little girls into dropping popcorn into her open maw as she scrolled an iPad and lamented the fashion she could no longer wear. She was oh so very, very terrifying. Cali had fallen for the bear terror for five seconds when they’d met, that was true. Then again, Cali had also believed Vinca a completely evil maniac who killed Onyx’s boyfriend, who was a loving and uplifting man, just to steal his powers and fuck with Onyx. She had assumed Dorran had loved and cherished Onyx until his dying breath. Cali had assumed Dorran had trained her, protected her, instead of abused her and hurled her at demons. Cali’s track record with assumptions was pretty horrific, actually. Horrifically awful.
She realised her lingering rage must have echoed through the bond when a soft touch to her forearm drew her attention. Once again, she was drawn into the trap of green, found herself beneath the crashing wave of Onyx’s gaze. This gaze, however, was different. It was sympathy and confusion, a jumbled mess of understanding which stood secondary to the fact Onyx wished to soothe. A small flick at the corner of Cali’s mouth let Onyx know the gesture was received, the storm had passed, at least for now. She didn’t need to keep her gaze on Onyx to know that the former Envy Assassin’s expression mirrored her own. Cheeky grins and eyes twinkling with mischief as Cali allowed her mind to sink into the images and emotions she needed to convey, needed Ripley to convey. Onyx was their awareness, her approval expressed in delighted cackles and birdsong laughter, by her touch on Cali’s arm shifting with her small body.
The bear started out stiff, walking in shorter, wider strides on hind legs as forelegs awkwardly extended before her in a zombie like attempt of curves. A few strides in, Ripley fell forwards, catching her weight on her forepaws, before attempting her waddling all over again. This time, poor Ripley tried to bring them to her back, only to manage to reach her hips; range of motion not allowing her any further. The awkward waddling, paws on hips appeared like something off a runway full of models who had indulged in too many illegal substances. The display had everyone howling with glee, even Ripley within the Envy Trio’s heads. Eventually, Ripley ceased the arms, instead waddling awkwardly around as crew shouted out their guesses.
“Zombies!”
“Onyx got a Runway offer!”
”Did you buy a petting zoo?”
Both Cali and Onyx laughed, shaking their heads to every shout. Ripley let forth a beastly groan as she lowered herself to the ground, then rolled onto her back. After some awkward shuffling, the bear eventually lifted her feet straight into the air, spread apart as far as her beastly hips would allow. The pose was awkward enough for a human, let alone a bear, with her little tail all fluffed up and her long arms gesturing in awkwardly small arcs across her rather fuzzy stomach.
“Onyx is getting a feature in a music video!”
“She’s designing for a dance studio!”
“Onyx has put on weight!”
“We’re meant to guess an announcement, moron, not state an obvious.”
“Cal, manners.”
“It’s true, she is a bit bulkier since she became human again.”
“You know, it’d be easier if you just told me what I was acting, instead of having me rolling around like a pregnant whale.” Ripley sighed through the bond, rising halfway before freezing. She seemed shocked beyond comprehension. Had she been human, Cali was sure Ripley’s face would have lost its hue. The Envy trio stared at each other. Onyx’s face had gone ashen with fright, concern filtering through her tight smile. Her apprehension flooded the bond, all her concerns jumbled together in a tide which threatened to wash both Ripley and Cali away. Fear that she might lose the approval of her sister figure. That she might garner disapproval or be judged for something beyond her control. That everyone would hate her. That she’d be alone again.
“Onyx is…?” Ripley’s question never came through completely.
The moment Cali realised what was happening, her mind was there. She stormed Onyx’s consciousness, shield raised to deflect every horrific thought and fear before she lashed out. Snapshots of fantasy, impossibilities given life for a few seconds. A scent more appealing and delicate than anything else the world could offer. Soft baby blonde hairs that appeared almost white against more tanned skin. Emerald green eyes glistening with nothing but utter adoration. The rush of family, how the feeling of their support could provide wings. Onyx, belly rounded, cheeks flushed and eyes twinkling with delight, toes kicking through a gentle stream. A loving smile from Vinca, the sharpness abandoned as she cooed over an innocent child. How tiny a child would be in Wrath’s large arms, yet how tender the brawler would be. Malakai’s warm smile as the baby traced his tattoos. Darius, dangling his chain just out of their reach as the babe giggled. Cal, strumming his guitar as the three men sung to the babe, who slumbered in an older Avi’s arms.
“Oh my god! Onyx is-” Again, Ripley never finished the though. Her eyes rolled backwards, almost as if she were being possessed in a hammer horror film. Her legs gave out, her body crumpled to the ground. Cali found herself swaying, her vision filled with black dots as the intensity of their emotions washed over the trio, sweeping them away in the tsunami. She clung to Onyx, fighting to keep the smallest Envy assassin on her feet. Onyx seemed to feel the same way, given how she clung tighter to Cali, preventing the Chinese woman from falling. A loud crash let Cali know that Ripley had indeed gone through the bowls of supplied snacks, along with the table they rested on. Chips flew everywhere, spraying across the penthouse along with shards of broken bowls. The laughter stopped, everyone half rising, half looking towards Cali.
“… That wasn’t part of the announcement.” Was the only thing Cali could offer to the expectant assassins. The room went eerily silent, enough that one might hear crickets chirping, or the din from the streets of Vegas echoing to the top floor of the hotel.
“She’s having a baby!” An entirely too cheerful voice broke the deafening silence, drawing everyone’s attention to Cal’s little boy. Avi stood in the doorway to the common area, his little yellow hood pulled up over sleep tussled black locks. His deep brown eyes shone like melted chocolate, filled with a tired child’s innocent delight and excitement. Cali couldn’t help but smile at the boy, giving him the smallest nod of approval, which only made him smile so delightedly that his white teeth stood starkly against his dark skin.
“How does that tie into O- oh…” Malakai started out confused, only for realisation to flood his rich eyes. His mouth fell open, brows arching towards his hairline as his gaze travelled between Avi, Cali then to Onyx. Cali couldn’t read him, couldn’t tell what that meant. Oh? That was ALL he had to say? Just oh? Oh, that was, OH, so very helpful.
“Oh?” Wrath began, her own eyes following the same path Malakai’s had.
“Ohhhhh…” She drew out, seeming to have reached the same conclusion he had. Cali felt herself bunch up, muscles rippling beneath her skin as if they were infected vines. Did they not realise what they were doing? Could they not see how Onyx shrunk away from them? Could they not tell how close to tears she was? It flooded Cali’s body, overwhelming her with its chill. As if winter had fallen for a thousand years across all her nerves until only an aching numbness lingered. The subtle tensions through her screamed her protective intentions as she angled herself defensively between the troupe and Onyx, shielding the anxious woman from such evident attention. If the troupe were going to hurt her, then they had better be prepared to face the wrath of Two Envy Assassins… or at least a sassy bike mechanic.
“Oh.” Wrath concluded. It was simple but telling, accompanied by the pinch of her brows. Confusion and consideration warred within her eyes, yet her face remained remarkably blank. It was enough to have Onyx’s breath escape shakily as she clung to Cali’s arm, squeezing until she was sure her nails would be biting through the colourful cloth of her hoodie. If Cali felt pain, it didn’t show, she simply stood silent. A guardian. A woman ready to fight tooth and nail to protect what she loved. The magic within her mark burned immensely hot, scorching Cali’s skin as its darkness flared, much like a panther swishing its tail in agitation. Despite everything, Onyx couldn’t help but lean closer, pressing her forehead into the mark she had left so long ago.
“Yeah. Big Oh.” Cal agreed, his own eyes shifting between everyone, calculating in his sharp, judgemental manner.
“A bad oh?” Cali challenged, unable to endure the strain of not knowing for a second longer. The calculating glances, the wide-eyed silence, everything screaming silent judgements. Cali couldn’t stand it, and if she couldn’t then she knew Onyx would be drowning. The blonde seemed to cower, tucking her head into Cali’s collar as the Asian woman unleashed her inner dragon upon every Assassin with a pointed glare. Cali’s arms encased Onyx, a fortress of flesh and bone protecting the scared princess. Despite her height, Cali found herself playing prince and dragon, both warring to keep the princess safe in their ways. It would be so easy to protect with nothing but love, to embody the princely hero and do no evil. Let the Princess make her own mistakes and swoop in to clean up the mess. However, Cali had always been more of a dragon. Someone to shield those she loved from harm with all her might, to try to prevent them ever leaving to make the mistake in the first place.
A universal flinch rolled through the Assassins, ricocheted like a bullet from Cal’s gun once they realised just how they had come across to the smallest yet brightest of their number.
“Girl, you’re gonna be a baby momma? I get to be an uncle?” It was Darius who brought the excitement. His seductive eyes shone with barely restrained glee; glee which bubbled through to his most dashing smile. His whole body appeared to vibrate, as if he was giving everything in order restrain himself. His glee was infectious, seeping into Cali’s muscles with a gentle warmth until they thawed. She allowed herself to relax a little, giving Onyx an opening to lift her head and give a shy nod. At that nod, sparks flew, igniting the warmth within every assassin. Darius practically flew forwards, wrapping his arms around Onyx and Cali in his excitement. Malakai was right behind him, scooping the three huggers into his humongous arms and giving a gentle squeeze. Finally, Onyx laughed with relief so potent it was as if the air itself heaved a sigh.
“I’m so happy for you.” Malakai whispered, lowering his head into the pack so that he could press an adoring kiss to Onyx’s cheek. Darius seemed determined to copy the gesture, planting his own lips to Onyx’s forehead in a few lazy pecks. Onyx giggled, squeezing whomever she could grasp. Cali didn’t kiss, not this time, she simply rested her forehead to Onyx’s temple, offering her own silent support.
“Congratulations, Onyx.” Wrath’s gentle voice was flooded with warmth, with unconditional love as she wrapped her own arms around the group, holding her team as if they may shatter under the intensity of her love. That thought was enough to make Cali smile. Wrath loved as she lived, hard and intense. When one had Wrath’s affection, they had the weight of her heart on their sleeve, the promise of an Arch Angel named for a sin. The warmth of Wrath’s hug was potent beyond the physical, it seeped into the soul. Wrath warmed from the inside out with her embrace, turning everyone mushy and relaxed. None relaxed further than Onyx, who trusted her weight to the men and women wrapped around her. Cali was perhaps the only one who denied herself the safety, instead raising her challenging glare to Caleb North. The only Assassin yet to give a reaction.
“Avi, cover your ears.” He finally began, letting forth a soft hiss of breath between his teeth. Long, callused fingers brushed through his supermodel locks, pushing them away from his glistening forehead as he waited for his ward to obey. Avi, innocently as ever, clamped his little hands over his twee ears. Only when Cal was sure that Avi was blocking his ears did the Sloth Assassin begin.
“I don’t understand how you’re all taking this so well. Especially you, Cali. Even a med dropout should -”
“I didn’t cheat!” Onyx’s outraged cry was enough to have everyone flinching. Onyx was a pool of wrath, sickly tar bubbling to a boil in a cauldron precariously positioned above the archway of a door. Or above the gates soldiers of shame might siege. Cali turned her focus back to Onyx, watching how her nostrils flared, reminiscent of her dragon form. Cali fancied she saw a haunted gleam in Onyx’s blazing green eyes, which had narrowed in utter fury, causing her piercing to gleam like a blade in the light. Gone was the whimpering, terrified maiden within that accusation. Onyx had already been that for two people. Now, Onyx stood confident, challenging the world instead of shying from an abuser. As terrified as she had been of her family’s reaction, Onyx was done running.
“I didn’t even think that!” Cal fired back, as if offended on Onyx’s behalf that such a thing were even considered. It was then Cali could see it. The concern waging war with cautious joy in his deep blue eyes. It was noticing that which kept Cali from lunging into the fray, instead giving Cal a chance to redeem himself in their eyes. Or dig his own grave.
“But pregnancy is stressful enough without adding demons, and the fact that you turned into a dragon! Ask yourself, with everything going on, is this really the time to start playing happy family? Is it safe? You see what I go through with Avi. What if you die, or die again in Onyx’s case? I’m worried about you. A child is a serious responsibility, not something to dabble with in the honeymoon phase of your re-“
“Honeymoon phase? That’s what you’re calling -” Cali fired up, her own dark eyes igniting with rage. Cal had dug his grave with construction grade machinery. She could feel the mark burning, instinctively knew it was the angriest it had ever been, as if rebelling along with the rest of her body. Her vision blurred, weakened legs causing her to half stumble. She could barely hold herself up, yet she wanted nothing more than to lunge at the Sloth assassin. Honeymoon phase? Is that what he thought? There was nothing honeymoon about dying! Nothing honeymoon about offering your soul to a lineage of power just to let the one you love have a single coherent thought!
“Enough.” Wrath didn’t raise her voice. She didn’t need to. The note of finality in her tone was more than enough to bring Cali’s instinctive outrage grinding to a halt long enough for her to take a soothing breath and blink away the haze from her vision. She felt Onyx do the same, even as Malakai, Darius and Wrath untangled from the cuddle huddle and respectfully gave the Envy assassins their breathing room.
“I think Cal is just as confused as we are as to how this happened.”
“The gay club doesn’t know?” Darius’ gasped interruption drew the eyes of the entire room, much like metal shavings to a magnet. Despite his crude wording, his shock that nobody else knew was evident, painted across his dashing face as if it were a canvas hanging in the Louvre.
“Darius. I’m not gay.” Onyx’s correction was gentle, delivered with an amused tilt to her lips.
“Errrmmmm, I’m bi.” Cali lifted a hand timidly, akin to how a child might raise it when unsure of the answer in class.
“I wasn’t invited to any club.” Malakai’s comment was delivered quietly, his brows arched in a mocking display of confusion. Wrath, dutiful as ever, simply crossed her large arms, muscles flexing deliciously with every subtle movement. Her head fell forwards, face meeting her awaiting palm as she bluntly informed everyone.
“There is no club.”
“Code then? So the Bi-bies are having a baby and broke the queer code? Like, aren’t don’t you queers have some form of secret club? How did the Lesbian not know? Aren’t you all meant to be experts on lady parts? Malakai might get a pass as a pan man. Queer people always seem to know everyone’s-”
“Darius.” Malakai began, stepping forwards. The sound of chips crunching beneath his boots was enough to draw a tiny snicker from Cali, though her amusement was quickly smothered by the exhausted frown on Wrath’s face. Her usually blazing eyes held poignant gleam. Something so deeply cut, as if her heart had once more been shattered. The mechanic didn’t even realise where Wrath’s mind had gone, not until she felt Onyx also tense beside her. Oh… that was too telling. The last time Wrath’s sexuality had come into the group, half the group had died. Her family had been torn apart as she helplessly cradled a broken heart heavy in a hollowed out chest. Darius had just toed a landmine; one he didn’t even realise he was prone to step on. Even Cal held his tongue, watching his leader with a softened expression that was all the more lancing. A joust of agony straight to Cali’s chest, or perhaps it was Onyx’s chest. At this point, it didn’t matter, both hearts beat to the same music, each complimentary and connected by the existence of music.
“Stop digging yourself into that hole, man, its deep enough.” Malakai concluded. Darius looked puzzled for a moment as he looked around the room before sudden realisation dawned in his eyes. Never had Cali seen him shuffle as awkwardly as he did then, steadfastly avoiding Wrath’s gaze.
“Right… but yeah, wow, congratulations baby girl, or baby momma now.”
“Thanks.” Onyx muttered, offering a small yet undoubtedly genuine flick of a smile.
“Cali, I gotta say, I did not peg you for… you know?” Darius powered on, earning several confused looks from the group. Genuine awe shone in his eyes, mixed with an overly heaped spoonful of respect. The concoction of emotions was potent, yet it only left Cali blinking in confusion.
“I do?” She drew the sounds out, shuffling awkwardly until she untangled herself from Onyx. With a flick of her chin, she attempted to clear a sweat slicked bang from her face, only to have it catch across her lashes. Her eyes watered, stinging with the saltiness of sweat, punishing her perhaps for not seeing what was going on. Where was Darius going with this?
“Like, wow. I guess we should have known you were packing from all the noise you two make, but I did not even notice.”
“Darius!” Onyx gasped, her tone scolding and scandalised even as the most awkward giggle imaginable bubbled in her throat. The beautiful slopes of her cheeks flushed brilliantly, showing through the layers of makeup in splotchy pinks. Only Cali knew that underneath, Onyx would be brighter than a tomato; her blush the embodiment of coals when left bare to the world.
“Noise? Packing?” Cali inquired, continuing to wipe at her offended eye as she tried to puzzle what Darius was saying.
“Like, your tuck job is insane! And it hardly looks like you’re wearing makeup at all! And your boobs, like, they look real, man.” He powered on like a trooper, gesturing to her chest area.
“Um… they are?” Cali’s questioning tone became even more befuddled. Why was he commenting on her chest? How did that tie into Onyx’s pregnancy? It was not like Cali was going to be providing breastmilk, so what else was she missing?
“Oh! I didn’t realise you were on treatments. That totally makes sense-”
“Hold on… do you think I’m-” Cali tried to interrupt. Treatments. Packing. Tuck job. Breast surgery. All of this pointed towards one thing.
“I’ve seen some bad tuck jobs in my day, I mean like, slipping from under the dress levels. Your tuck-”
“I DON’T HAVE A DICK DARIUS!” Cali shouted, sending the entire room into silence. Instantly, her hands flew to her mouth, covering it in utter shock at her own outburst. Embarrassed didn’t begin to cover it, she was utterly mortified. Both for her outburst and that her sex was even in question. Then, guilt washed over her. Guilt that she was embarrassed over an assumption, that she was even edging on potentially phobic behaviour. She had been born female; born the way she was meant to be as a person. That she was embarrassed as being mistaken for trans felt as if she was insulting the trans community somehow. That thought alone made her feel sick.
“…Oh.”
“We really needed to hear that. I don’t think downstairs heard you.” Cal’s particular brand of snark earned a soft snort from several people, which only made Cali’s cheeks burn hotter. Despite this, she uncovered her face, taking a deep breath before speaking.
“I’m not trans. Also, that is so rude! If someone is trans you don’t just casually tell them you’ve made them! That’s so hurtful! Come on, man.”
“Not cool, Darius. Not cool.” Malakai added. The other assassins nodded, murmuring their agreement.
“Then how are you two so loud? We’ve had to invest in earplugs, and your noise has chased off four girls this week!” Darius’ lament was met by a loud scoff from Cali.
“Seriously? That’s what you meant by noise, Darius? You’re Lust, literally, and can’t think how to get loud without a …?” She trailed off, making several awkward gestures with her hand. Her fingers curled, forming a loose cupping shape as flicked her wrist back and forth, hand around the height of her stomach. Her gesture didn’t last long before Onyx’s shoulder playfully bumped into hers, earning a playful tap in return as the women swayed into one another.
“There have been noise complaints… and a cleaning bill for the elevator. Also, a note to visit lost and found. Something about clothing?” Wrath dutifully informed, fighting off the dusting of pink across her cheeks as valiantly as she could. Several pairs of eyes fixed upon Onyx, who suddenly seemed to shrink into Cali’s side. The Chinese woman felt Onyx’s body heat up, enough that she was convinced steam should have been hissing from Onyx’s ears like smoke from a coal train. In the heat of the moment, neither Cali nor Onyx had stopped to think about anything save each other. Clothes had been abandoned across Vegas, and the elevator… the memory of trees flooded the bond. Onyx climbing Cali like one. The dirt filled roots of the tree Onyx had gifted Cali when she was a dragon. Innocence and seductive depravity bubbled within the bond, only increasing the heat in both their faces.
“Can I be dead again?” Onyx squeaked, covering her face with Cali’s hoodie. The idea of Onyx dying again was agonising, enough that a sharp retort bubbled on the tip of Cali’s tongue. She swallowed it, pushing her tongue down into the cavity of her jaw to resist crying out. If she was in the position of being told to retrieve her clothing from lost and found, Cali probably would have felt the same way.
“Hold on. I thought we were discussing how Onyx got knocked up.” Darius cut in. Instantly, Cali was conflicted. His bluntness was a smack on the snout, though it did save them from a far more awkward conversation.
“Darius…” Cal’s hissed warning was enough to send a chill through the room.
“Which we are all crazy happy for, baby girl, but it is a big change.” The Lust assassin continued, earning a loud snort from Onyx.
“Yeah. Tell me about it.”
“She didn’t cheat, and we didn’t exactly plan for it. Nahara told us there could be a cost for restoring Onyx to her human form. The possibilities included a physical manifestation of the bond between the barer of the mark and Envy.” Cali explained. She stepped up a little, moving to wrap her arm securely around Onyx’s shoulders. Such lithe shoulders, despite their muscle, that bore the weight of the world. Such smooth skin beneath her fingertips as she massaged the curve of Onyx’s far shoulder, trying to ease even a fraction of her burden. Cali’s fingers traced odd patterns, even tickling down the divots of Onyx’s muscled biceps.
“Which arguably could be you. You’re both now, Cali.” Malakai commented, tone thoughtful. His dark eyes narrowed, as if he could read the answer from the bare air if only he focused hard enough. A large hand came to his strong chin, scratching at it thoughtfully.
“That’s what I thought too, but…” Cali trailed off, turning her gaze to Onyx. This was too close to Onyx’s demons, to the secrets she still kept. Cali desperately wanted to speak, yet she found herself tongue tied. Lost in the pain she saw in bright green eyes. Lost in her own loyalty. Could she even physically make herself betray Onyx in this way? Was it a betrayal to reveal the rest of what had been said? Internally, she pleaded, letting her emotions touch the bond between the Assassins. She needed Ripley to validate her, needed Onyx’s consent and understanding. She was falling, plummeting off a cliff with no wings to fly and no claws to cling to the stone she might be able to reach.
“She also mentioned something from the past could return to my future… well, our future.”
The moment the words left Onyx’s mouth, a soft grunt from the table drew Onyx’s attention. Ripley had managed to work herself into a sitting position, something which Cali found rather comical. The bears legs were spread apart, much like an awkward toddler, whilst her back was ramrod straight, akin to a woman forced into an impossibly tight corset. Ripley didn’t flood the bond with her words, she simply watched and listened, apparently trying to understand the responses from Wrath and Cal.
“From the past? When wer-“
“Dorran. Those weeks he increased your training.”
“WEEKS?” Cali exploded, viciously demanding an answer. Everything was red, hazy and hot, as if she’d been looking into the sun too long. Even behind her closed eyes, circles and swirls of color danced across her vision, hammering in time with her racing heart. This was worse than when she’d ridden her bikes to exhaustion or suffered sunstroke. Worse than the migraines that had occasionally followed. This was all of them at once, assaulting her body until only Onyx’s deceptively strong arm around her waist kept her standing. There was no question of whether or not she’d collapse, Onyx wouldn’t allow that, but the intensity burning through her was enough to make her remaining words slurred, gasped out between clenched teeth.
“He did that for weeks until h-” She never finished. Images assaulted her, striking her like books falling from a shelf above her head. An exhausted Onyx offering her best effort of a reassuring smile. She could take it. The deep barking voice. She’ll never learn if you don’t push her. How could she? Onyx wasn’t an assassin! She was barely on her feet. Its ok, Ripley, I can take it. Obedience… denied. She couldn’t. Not anymore. That harsh voice. Then I’ll do it myself. Go be useful. Hospital. Sirens. All my fault. All… Ripley. These were Ripley’s memories. It was sickening to realise this. Ripley had been part of it, she’d been right there and had trusted her leader. Trusted Dorran to protect Onyx. That sick man had used her connection to Onyx as a tool, had weakened Onyx with someone she loved unconditionally first… Cali’s tongue was bathed in bile, hot and thin, save for the chunks of chip swimming in the liquid. Dorran hadn’t even been man enough to do all the work himself. He’d manipulated Ripley too. With a soft snarl, Cali swallowed, refusing to let herself become any weaker than she felt in her directionless rage.
“Your abusive ex physically beat you into hospital? And caused a miscarriage? And nobody knew you were pregnant or that he was abusive? What the hell? Cal? Wrath? I though you two were assassins! How could you not realise what that piece of shit had done?” Gone was Darius’ amusement. His voice was raspy in his rage, scratching his usually chocolaty vocal cords. His eyes, which were usually dark, appeared almost black. Made of shadows and rage. He was half Wrath’s size, but the intensity of his demanding glare cowed even the brave leader, who was working her jaw in effort to find even a syllable of an answer. Tears dripped from the corners of her eyes, trailing openly down her cheeks as she allowed her gaze to fall to the toes of her bright red boots. Wrath, who was so strong, could barely stand under the weight of her guilt. Her shoulders shook, slouched in defeat. She may have been their leader. She may have been able to punch the devil out of every man, woman or child she met, but she couldn’t fight off the most horrific truth yet. She had nothing. No answer to give. No justification, even to herself.
“That’s why Vinca killed him, isn’t it? She knew about the pregnancy when that accident put you in hospital. Remind me to send her a gift basket.” Cal didn’t have an answer either, but he pushed on. His own eyes bore an unnatural sheen, one Cali quickly realised were tears. He was close to crying in his outrage. An assassin he may have been, but he was just as helpless now as when he had been possessed. Forced to watch the past rolled out in painful memories. For all the people he had saved, he was clearly struck by the potential he had failed. The possibility he had never even known about. Someone he would have loved with his whole heart, even if it was a lump of coal, and yet was powerless to protect.
“Does she know about the baby?” Wrath barely got the question out before Darius was there, snarling once again.
“Like hell.”
“With Nitsa inhabiting her? After she got my blood? We barely got Rip back, we can’t risk it. I’m not even sure if we should let Yvette know. I’m sorry, Onyx, but until Vinca is safe, I don’t want to risk either of you. I don’t want to control you, or keep you caged, but-” Cali’s imploring was cut off by Onyx’s finger across her lips, silencing her with the gentlest of touches.
“I know, you’re looking out for me. You’re not him.”
“Needless to say, Rip and I will be protecting Onyx, so we won’t be out with you. I also really don’t want Onyx combat training, or up on the highwire.”
“Cali…” Onyx playfully whined, fixing Cali with her best attempt at Puppy Dog eyes. Internally, Cali swore up a storm, using words she was sure even Darius would blush at. The bike mechanic forced herself to gaze into them, willed herself not to crumble at the adorable attempt. If Onyx was bad, how was her child going to be? The idea of baby Onyx alone had Cali cooing, turning into a pile of Oriental mush. If she hadn’t developed an immunity by the time they learned this trick… suddenly, she found herself incredibly hopeful that Onyx could be the strict parent, because Cali could already foresee ice cream for dinner. But to get there, she had to get over this current hurdle. The hurdle of Onyx’s adorableness amped up to a million and directed at her.
“Yeah, no. Sorry. Drop out Doctor’s orders. No being ten foot in the air while pregnant.”
“But the show-”
“Will be there when you’ve had your baby and are ready to return. Your health, and the baby’s health, come first, Onyx.” Wrath reminded; her tone gentle but leaving no room for negotiation. She offered a gentle smile, tears still glistening in her eyelashes. Her warmth was back, encompassing the room with a calming presence. It was enough for Cali to relax, to finally let go of everything and trust her team. These assassins were family. Onyx’s family. Her family. No matter what, she knew they would do their best to protect one another. That they’d die before allowing anybody to harm the baby. That they’d go to the depths of hell, following after Wrath’s angelic aura, to save each other. That’s just what this family did.
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borgesbourgignon · 3 years
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I just found a subreddit called r/egg_irl and it's a triiiiip
My journey to accepting my identity was pretty smooth, all told (coming out to my immediate family, a little less so). It kicked off when I admitted to my partner that I'd long been interested in wearing women's clothes, and it concluded within a few months when I said aloud to no one "I'm nonbinary" and felt not just normal but good. I had support from my trans and cis friends the whole way through. It wasn't nearly as fraught as what many of the sub's posts express. And even though I showed quite a few signs of nonconformity throughout my life, much of that only became clear in hindsight and didn't cause me much suffering (as far as I can recall).
Even so, looking at the posts dredged up some alarming feelings. One in particular reflected how OP's tastes in porn shifted from m/f to lesbian to "tr*ps." I myself have mostly watched f/f porn since taking up that habit. Only recently did I start watching porn with males, but I only enjoy POV. I can't watch porn if I can see a man's face. I only watch POV porn with male voices because they significantly outnumber vids that only feature the woman speaking. I'm "straight" in that I'm AMAB and only feel sexual attraction to AFAB folks, but I don't enjoy straight porn because I like as little of a male presence as possible.
Is that a dysphoria thing? I don't feel dysphoria. I love my dick, and I don't want or feel any need for bottom surgery. I was definitely "born in the right body," to use a possibly outdated phrase. Still, seeing that post grabbed my attention.
Not nearly as much as this one, though:
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Hi, um, what the fuck is this
I - okay, let's work through this. Ever since I was little, except for a stretch from like fourth grade to seventh grade, I have liked girls. Pretty much any girl who gave me the time of day would stir something in me, if only for a little bit. Not all of them blossomed into crushes, let alone deeper levels of desire. But they were still there. I have liked, to some degree, the overwhelming majority of my AFAB friends. No, I have not admitted it to most of them. And I haven't admitted this to anyone, I think, not even my partner (they don't strike me as the jealous or insecure type, but I fear they may start side-eyeing our AFAB friends and especially any new ones we make).
Is all that ... gender envy? Like, the crushes were def crushes, and anything deeper was sincere, but were all the twinges I felt for other girls actuator twinges of this envy rather than attraction? It doesn't sound all that feasible at the moment, but being attracted to literally almost every girl you meet is also a little strange when you think about it. Right?
I wouldn't be asking if this post hadn't stopped me dead in my tracks. I actually said "WHAT" aloud. Many of the commenters on the post even said they hadn't heard of the concept until well into their 30s and 40s. Perhaps I should look into it ...
One last post that sums up this whole experience:
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This, except it was actually 20 minutes (followed by like another 20 minutes of writing)
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mergeatrois · 5 years
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Desire
Have to upload again because Tumblr cannot make up their mind on banned content after it was prior approved :))
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Sarah’s life felt like it was spiraling downwards. Her grades were shabby, she felt sick almost everyrday now, and worst of all, her own roommate had started bullying her. Sarah thought that life would get better after she came out of the closet, and for a little while it did. Her family was supportive and accepting and she felt relieved to finally tell everyone the truth. Things would have actually been pretty decent if it wasn’t for her roommate Kacey.
Kacey didn’t even talk much to Sarah before she came out as a lesbian. She figured that it wouldn’t have even changed anything between them but she was sadly mistaken. Kacey started lashing out at Sarah, small at first, forcing chores onto her and making small but insensitive comments about her appearance. Eventually these things grew into outright sharp insults, rumor spreading, and even stealing. Kacey was one of the most popular and beautiful girls on campus so her rumors were practically truths to every student that she told. “She cheats and plagiarizes all of her work” “She’s kind of a huge slut” “She’ll steal just about anything she can get her hands on”. All of these falsehoods ran through Sarah’s mind day in and day out all thanks to her shitty roommate.
Kacey wouldn’t even call Sarah by her name, she just referred to her as “bitch” or “dike”. Sarah felt like an intruder at her college, even in her own dorm she didn’t feel very safe unless Kacey was out of the dorm. The bullying was bad enough on its own, but the worst part had to have been that Sarah had developed a crush on Kacey before she came out. Sarah couldn’t help herself when she saw Kacey, she was easily the hottest girl on campus. She was gorgeous, fit, and busty. She was everything that Sarah found sexy. Even her “high and mighty” demeanor was a turn on for Sarah. She would give just about anything to see that smug, snakey look wipe off her face while Sarah dominated her in the bedroom. Nothing turned her on more than thinking about Kacey. She’d think about her almost every time when she masturbated, but on the inside she knew that her fantasies would remain just that, fantasies.
One night, Sarah stayed up late, trying desperately to finish work deadlines and maybe fit in some time to rub one out if she could manage. Kacey was gone that night. She went out on a date with some guy she had met just a few days ago. Sarah was relieved that Kacey was gone but still felt sick with envy. “Lucky asshole” she muttered to himself while thinking of the bastard that would push inside Kacey’s guts that night. She felt frustrated after finishing up her work, she needed some relief. She pulled up her regular porn site and scanned the numerous pages, looking for something good to watch. She searched closely, reading every title on every page. Eventually, she noticed a small, recurring ad banner that had appeared on the last few pages. She scoffed as she read the scamming advertisement. “One trick that’ll help you fuck anyone you want!” Sarah shook her head. How could people even fall for shit like that? What a waste of time. She went on to the next page and noticed that every ad banner was replaced with the one that she had read before moving on. “That’s….odd” she thought as she clicked the refresh button. The page blinked white before reloading. Now all the thumbnails to the videos on the browser were replaced with an small image of the ad banner that she had seen earlier. She read the titles on all the videos, they were all the same. “Life changing product! Click now!”
Sarah winced. She was spooked to hell at this point. What the fuck kind of ad did this? She shivered a bit, slightly shaken by the strange glitch that covered the web page. She decided the bite the bullet. Maybe there was something about the ad that drew her in. Sarah didn’t know, and for some reason, she didn’t even care. She winced and clicked one of the many links that threw her straight to strange website. A picture appeared before her. A image of a smooth, plastic bottle filled with a strange orange substance. Underneath the image was a title filled with big tooney letters and a picture of a young, smiling cartoon witch. The title read “Bellamy’s Magical Elixir!” Sarah scrolled down to read the description of the weird product.
“A new supernatural lotion that will let you have the body of your dreams! Do you ever get tired of being you? Or do you simply want a hotter sex life? Have you ever dreamed about being a hot supermodel or a muscled up stud? If you answered yes to any of these then this oil is for you! Just grab the partner that you want to merge with and rub the oil into both of your bodies. Once both the bodies are finely lubricated, just squeeze together and voila, you now have the body that you always dreamed of. Enjoy your new life and your wildest fantasies! Now only $9.99 per bottle!”
Sarah couldn’t believe her eyes. This couldn’t be real, could it? “I mean, what hope do I really have left?” She asked herself. Sarah felt hopeless in her situation. Kacey was making her life a living hell, and the idea of being someone that Kacey found irresistible turn Sarah on more than ever. Worse case scenario, she blows 10 bucks on a useless bottle of lube. Sarah placed the order as fast as she could. Once the money was sent, the page closed abruptly. She tried searching for the website that she had ordered from just seconds ago but nothing popped up in the search engine. Sarah groaned loudly. “Fuuuuuuuck. I can’t believe I actually bought into that crap.” She was too disappointed in herself to even masturbate that night. She marched over to her bed defeatedly and flopped onto bed. Sarah closed her eyes tightly, trying desperately to forget that the night even happened.
She woke up the next morning feeling like death itself. Her eyelids were still heavy. She went into the kitchen and looked around the dorm for a bit. Thank god, Kacey was still gone. She yawned loudly and began stretching before a loud knock resounded from her door. The banging was so loud that it made her jump. “Jeez, spoke too soon I guess.” she mumbled before marching over to the door. She looked through the peephole to that Kacey wasn’t in front of the door. In fact, no one was. She opened the door cautiously and looked around seeing no one. She began to walk outside her dorm when her foot kicked a small package. Sarah picked up the package slowly in disbelief. “No way…it’s already here?” she asked to no one. “That was like, crazy fast.” She walked back inside and ripped the package open. A slim plastic bottle filled with a syrupy orange fluid. She read the instructions on the label on the back of the bottle. She repeated the instructions: “Find yourself a partner and oil up together. Once both bodies are thoroughly lathered with the substance, squeeze both bodies together and enjoy the new you. Note: Only one partner will retain their conscious during this process. The possessed partner will be gone forever and the one taking over will lose every semblance of their old life. The partner that’s being taken over will wait on standby once they are coated in the elixir. Please use with caution.”
For the first time in a long time, Sarah was filled with excitement. All the events up to this point had been so…strange. The glitching ad, the disappearing website, and the fast as hell delivery. Maybe there was something to this elixir after all. She decided to put her faith in the oil. Sarah packed the oil in her bag and rushed over to find Kacey’s laptop. Sarah had snuck a peek at her password while she was typing it in a few months ago, but she didn’t think to use her laptop until this point. Sarah searched quickly through Kacey’s facebook, skype, email messages, trying to find anything about a guy that she was crazy about. Hope seemed lost until she looked through her bookmarks. She saw a tab that linked her directly to the channel of a cammer that Kacey had visited quite often. Sarah looked at pictures of the man in the camera. He was a tall, dark, muscular man with a pretty large following on the site. He would stream naked every other day and put on a show for all of his viewers. The guy looked so familiar to Kacey. She finally figured it out. The guy in the cam was Martin Lennard. He was a student attending their university. No wonder Sarah recognized him, she had seen him just a few months ago while going to the gym. Sarah had been working out with her sister that day when she first saw Martin. He didn’t play any sports for the college but with a body like his, he certainly could. It made sense now why he didn’t, and why he was so reserved. “Jesus Christ, he’s a fucking cam boy.” Sarah said to herself again.
The only time she saw Martin let loose was in the gym. She couldn’t remember much but she could definitely recall how loud he was when he worked out. He strained his entire muscle covered body while in the gym, trying to work out every single muscle until he was drenched in hot sweat. Even Sarah had to admit that he was a pretty dashing guy. Sarah found that Kacey was an avid donator to his stream. She tuned in and donated almost every time he went live. She must have been super into him. It didn’t take long for Sarah to form up a plan. She HAD to get Martin’s body at any cost. This was too good an opportunity to pass up. She sighed calmly before closing the laptop and packing her bag and leaving for class.
During the day, Sarah remembered what day it was when she had seen Martin at the campus gym and began fine tuning her plan. By the time her last class rolled around, she finally had everything worked out. Wednesday rolled around and Sarah took a day off from classes to hang around the gym, waiting for Martin to arrived. Finally she saw his giant, beefy figure stomp towards the gym entrance. He looked absolutely massive. He wore a white tank top that looked almost too small for him. The edges of his meaty pecs poked out the sides of the thin shirt. His swollen arms swung around his heavy gym bag effortlessly as he opened the door to the gym. Sarah jumped up and walked towards the gym desperately to try and follow. She watched him disappear into the men’s locker room before she could grab his attention. She would have to improvise. She waited until he reemerged before sneaking in as fast as possible. Her face was red while she sneaked inside and fear gripped her entire body. She prayed to god that she didn’t get caught.
“Fuck fuck fuck.” she repeated as she slowly snaked through the locker room. She peered into each and every closed locker before finally finding Martin’s gym bag sitting next to an open locker. What a score, he must have forgotten to pack it up before working out. She pulled out the half empty bottle of Bellamy’s Elixir and scratched off the label as neatly as possible before slipping it in his bag. After everything was set she quickly ran out of the locker room and slipped out of the gym in embarrassment.
Sarah went back to her dorm and saw Kacey wandering around inside, talking on the phone. “Yeah, shit didn’t work out last night, I’ll be over in a bi- Oh wait, she’s here. Here, I’ll talk outside, you know how snakey she can be.” Kacey walk past Sarah narrowing her eyes with a devilish grin on her face before she put down the phone and started talking. “I’m gonna be at a friend’s place for most of today. Clean shit up around here. I swear, you dikes can be so damn messy sometimes.” Sarah cringed at Kacey’s caty insult before she walked out of the door with her purse in hand. “Fuck I hate her” she thought as she opened up her laptop. It had only been about 20 minutes since Martin entered the gym, he’d probably be back home in about an hour. Sarah had to get ready. She searched around her bed, finding the other bottle that she had filled with the magic oil. “Christ. I hope this works.”
She waited in Martin’s hallway near his door. He would be there any second. Just when she thought about backing out, she could see him walking towards his door with his gym bag in hand. Sarah jumped a bit and began fumbling through her purse, looking like she was just looking for her keys. She listened closely as Martin opened his door and slammed it shut. She stopped for a minute. She could hear the door lock. Martin may have been a strong guy, but the man was definitely not too careful. Sarah waited another minute in silence before opening his door slowly and inching into the dorm. She left her purse outside, only taking the other half of the oil. She snuck through his place carefully before finding a closet to hide in while he showered in the bathroom. She took the time to strip down naked in the dark closet and cover her body in the oily substance. The orange elixir seeped into her skin making her soft, white flesh nice and slippery. Her face turned red in embarrassment once more. It was strange being naked and oiled up but she was banking on this elixir to escape her shitty life with Kacey.
After what seemed like hours, Martin finally stomped out of the bathroom and past the closet that Sarah was hiding in. She peeked outside the closet door to see him almost completely naked, wearing nothing but a towel that wrapped around his waist. He opened his laptop and started typing on the keyboard before stepping back.
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“Everything set up, we live?” He said in his deep, masculine voice. She could see a smile form across his face. “Nice, nice” he said before dropping the towel. Sarah’s eyes widened as she saw the jock strapped that firmly hugged against Martin’s crotch. She covered her mouth, doing her best to contain her excitement.
“I’ve got a real nice show for you guys tonight.” She said with a smirk before pulling out the bottle of elixir that Sarah had slipped into his gym bag. “Forgot I had a little something left in my gym bag. You guys are in for a fuckin’ treat.”
He poured the oil into his hands began rubbing the orange fluid all over his puffed out chest. His hands wrapped around his bulging pecs, slowly coating them in the slippery, reflective liquid. His dark skin glistened and his muscles shined as he slowly bathed himself in the slippery oil. He looked so…hot. He wiped his hands over his tight abs over and over, making sure that the light reflected off their solid surface the most. He refilled his palms with the orange substance before coating his giant arms next. Christ they were fucking huge. Sarah didn’t even care to look at their stunning form the first time that she had seen Martin. He was fucking shredded. He flexed his dark cannons tightly, letting his biceps swell as he washed the oil over their beefy structure. He opened his eyes, staring deeply into his giant guns before turning towards the camera. “Mmmm yeah, you fuckin like that? You like my massive guns huh? Fuck yeah you do.” Even from all the way in the closet, Sarah could see the veins on his biceps thrust against his shimmering, ebony skin. He covered his whole torso in the oil, eventually reaching his hands into the jockstrap to oil up his dick. He moaned softly and tilted back his head as he touched himself, slowly coating that thick black dick of his with the lotion. He finally poured the rest over his thick thighs, letting streams of the magic elixir flow down his legs before he rubbed it into his dark flesh.
He continued to moan and run his hands over his mounds of muscle as the oil seeped into his skin until he suddenly opened his eyes and sat up straight. He looked almost dazed and he stared at his oiled up body in confusion before shaking his head and turning off the laptop in front of him. Once he closed it, he brought over a chair and sat down. He reached his hand inside the jockstrap once more. From what Sarah could see, he was slowly jerking his cock over and over as he tilted his head back with his eyes closed. Sarah slowly inched out of the closet, covering her chest and crotch as she slowly stepped towards the muscled giant. He started moaning deeply, still oiling up his long, black shaft. Sarah stood in front of the intimidating stud, taking a good look at his body as she stood cautiously. He didn’t even seem to notice her. He moved his hand outside of the jock, letting the strap fill with his growing member. The front of the strap shot out with a large bulge, it grew progressively thicker and thicker as he heaved his heavy chest up and down. Sarah sat slowly onto his lap, trying her best to ignore the massive bulge that ran past her butt and down her thigh. She pulled the strap upwards and slipped her oily legs inside with ease. She let the jock go and the strap snapped against her soft skin making her wince as it pulled their bodies together tightly. Instead of feeling the smack of his oily taut skin, she began falling through his thick waist ass first.
She looked down unexpectedly and her eyes widened with excitement once more. She held her breath as her legs and her waist slowly vanished into his huge, herculean form. A strange sensation coursed through her body. Her legs felt almost twice as heavy as before and something felt so off about her crotch. She felt a strong fabric squeezing against her crotch. It would have felt uncomfortable if her body was so oiled up. “W-wait. Oiled up?” She thought to herself. She looked down once more. Her old legs were completely gone. Her soft white flesh was now replaced with dark, brown skin that was pulled taut over her muscular legs and her crotch was now being hugged tightly by the tight white jockstrap. Nothing could have prepared her for what happened next. Her new cock began to grow as her breaths became more and more rapid. Her shaft slowly inched upwards against the front of the strap, making the bulge grow bigger by the second. She winced with discomfort. “This-this is so fucking weird.” She said while trying to catch her breath. She couldn’t believe it. She had a cock. A big cock at that. She narrowed and eventually closed her eyes tightly as her dick became harder and harder. It felt weird but somehow so pleasurable. Eventually her eyes opened and she moaned softly as her cock eventually hit its peak and began thrashing fiercely against the soft cotton briefs. She wanted to feel it up so badly but fought the urge to jerk off right then and there.
She fell back, her slender, girlish figure disappearing into the void of Martin’s heavyset chest. His chest seemed to swallow her whole. It took in her body so easily. Sarah blinked an eye before feeling the air suck out of her chest. She inhaled desperately but her chest felt massive and unnatural. It was a chore to bring air into her lungs but she slowly got used to the feeling. She looked down and immediately, her gaze was met with her new hunky torso. Her new black pecs were bursting with strength and muscle, they heaved up and down with heavy weight as she sucked air into her new giant lungs. Fuck. This felt so weird. So unlady-like but she loved how fucking strong her chest was now. Even her tight, firm abs felt fucking incredible. She bounced her new beefy pecs up and down over and over again. She loved showing off their strength and form. She bite her lips as she lifted her skinny arms against his rippling, shimmering, black cannons. His arms curved around hers and her arms slipped into his without resistance.
She could feel their power instantly. The size of her swollen biceps and dark, furry forearms. The veins that thrusted forcibly against her slippery, brown flesh and the muscles that lined around her deep hairy armpits. “Fuuuuck” she let out as her arms strained to thrust their muscles up tightly against her skin. Was in love with this body. She couldn’t wait to explore all its ins and outs. She sunk back her head with a large smile on her face before the old Sarah completely vanished.
Sarah’s eyes blinked groggily as she looked around the dorm. A sense of unease and familiarity filled her body. She felt like a stranger inside the dorm but at the same time, she felt right at home. She blinked her eyes fully open before looking down at her body. A smile crossed her face. She was a total hunk. She felt like an intruder in this gorgeous body, like she didn’t belong. Even though this feeling loomed over her head, she loved her stunning, brawny figure way too much to let it bother her. Sarah stood up from her chair and began feeling up her muscled chest, filling her giant hands with her bunching black pecs. That name ran through her head over and over. “Sarah. Sarah. No no no, Sarah is gone. Martin feels so much better.” Martin brought up her thick arms and began flexing this as hard as he could. “Yeah….Martin” he said to himself with a cocky grin wiping across his face.
Martin loved his body. It was the one that he had been building up for his entire life, but it felt so new. It was like playing with a cool new toy for the very first time. He thrusted his pecs out forcefully, letting his chest swell with air, making his muscles look even more massive and pronounced. God, he loved this fucking body. Everything about it was just so damn perfect. From his massive arms to his heavy, unmovable chest, even his glistening dark skin felt so fucking sexy to have. And his cock, god his cock was perfect. Long, girthy, and throbbing for some action. He was so absorbed in checking out his arms and chest that he had almost forgotten how the strap was hugging tightly against his thick, muscled member. His bulge was pulsing and thrashing around fiercely as he flexed his heavyset form. Another wide grin crossed his face as he pulled down the strap. His long black cock shot forward instantly, still throbbing over and over, just waiting to be touched.
He couldn’t wait any longer. Martin wrapped his big muscular hands around his veiny shaft, slowly running his hand up and down its length. His palm was completely filled with his girthy black shaft, he could even feel the veins brush against his hands as he jerked his cock over and over. His dick was nice and slick thanks to the oil that he put on it earlier, it felt so fucking good as he let his hand glide effortlessly up and down his massive dick. Martin’s forearm began to tighten and cover with veins as he tugged faster and faster. The sight of it gave him an idea. He brought up his other arm and flexed, letting his biceps bulge up near his head. His biceps were fucking huge. Covered in a thick layer of lean muscle, riddled with veins, he loved their size. The pleasure was weighing on him. He moaned deeply, his voice booming throughout the dorm as he pulled on his long dick over and over again. It felt fucking amazing. Beads of sweat broke the coat of oil that covered his muscled chest as he heaved it up and down, slowly getting closer and closer to his climax. His abs were sucked in tight, their deep grooves and ridges still holding small streams of slippery sweat as he held them in, keeping them nice and firm. His pits deepened as he flexed his entire body, finally letting out a loud roar as he could feel his load escape his thickened shaft. His hard, now pulsating cock shot out stream after stream of hot, sticky cum. The fluid escaped his fat tip, spewing puddles of white fluid onto the carpet, almost reaching the desk where his laptop laid. Martin breathed in deeply as he smashed back down into his chair, his hand still gripped firmly around his dark, veiny shaft. He slowly milked every last drop of cum out of his muscled rod before rolling his head back with a smile on his face. This body was absolutely perfect.
Thanks for reading. If you like the stories with thinking of yourself as being the one to merge into others and have spare time to RP, hit up my DMs as I’m always generally looking. Cheers.
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asheasexualvampire · 4 years
Text
Being Asexual in Time
Greetings, my dear readers, both mortal and mortality-challenged alike! How has your week been? Mine has been fair to middling. Have I mentioned I have a dog? I do have a pet. He’s delightful company. Spoiled brat. This is said with a great deal of affection, I’m the one responsible for the spoiling after all. I digress. I hope you had a good week, that you didn’t have any major issues that caused upheaval in your life. The plague is still upon us, be safe. Wear your masks. Today I thought I would give you a glimpse into what it was like to be asexual over time. As I’ve mentioned previously, I am not terribly old, as vampires go. I only date back to the late Tudor era as a mortal. However, I knew even back in those days, fairly early on, that something was... Amiss. Back then, being homosexual of any sort was a punishable offense, so one didn’t really speak about it except in certain society, and even then we had many polite euphemisms. One thing that came about was a term, Boston marriage. This was, in its most plain, a lesbian marriage, perfectly acceptable. Mostly this was between two ladies of some status, who had either money or holdings, and they lived together and no one thought anything of it. Gentlemen had it a bit tougher, and with the introduction of the 1885 Criminal Law Amendment Act, the police and judicial system at large began to put pressure on those of us who were in any way atypical from societal norms. Then there was the arrest and conviction of Oscar Wilde. You can use the google machine to look into that. Being asexual, myself, I found it easier to try and keep a low profile as a mortal being, I was born to middling class parents, so we didn’t move about in Society, but we also weren’t particularly of the impoverished sort. I was born and designated female, which at the time was the one of two options. Growing up I found myself confounded by the layers and layers of skirts and petticoats, bustle pads, corsets, hip pads, and general frippery that women had to deal with. I was much in envy of my male companions who just had some drawers, trousers, undershirt, shirt, and jacket to deal with. No annoying ribbons and laces, no dozens of hooks and ties that held things up and together. A general day outfit for myself would have weighed upwards of 15lbs! Anyone who says that Victorian ladies were “delicate”, needs to put on all that rubbish and go around in it for a full week. Delicate my foot. At some point I persuaded a friend of mine, who was of a certain sort, to kit me up in men’s clothes one night. Suddenly I was FREE. I could move and do things in a more normal way! We went out to one of his clubs, had drinks, saw a show, it was glorious. When I was Made at last, I was able to “die”, and then invent myself as I saw fit! Being a sex-repulsed, but still romantic natured person, I invented myself as a quiet gentleman, a confirmed bachelor, who was neither interested in marrying, and also unconcerned with whom one consorted. Luckily, vampiric society is much looser in its rules, it would be very boring to be stuck with restrictive ways for hundreds of years. I was hardly the only asexual vampire I met, or the only one who had romantic liaisons with varied and sundry other persons. Moving into the 1920s, things started to open up again, film stars became a thing, silent films having arrived. Women in tails and trousers showed up on screen, kissed the ladies, and swanned out. It was glorious. I spent more time in these new film houses, and then out at dinners with others of the same set. In the 1950s it became rather constrictive again, ladies wore petticoats again, layers of them, pearls, girdles, strapped into things that I couldn’t imagine putting myself in. As you know, I was always overweight, I would have made a miserable lady. I remained in male dress, even though I didn’t feel entirely masculine. Jump forward to the 1970s and 1980s, and suddenly it wasn’t such a problem. I don’t know how or why it changed, it honestly felt like it happened overnight. But suddenly there were crowds of men in sparkly glitter spandex with platform heels, or men with long hair and ripped jeans, and still considered masculine! I was finally able to be myself again. I didn’t have to strap my chest down (which is deeply uncomfortable, by the by), if I felt like wearing a skirt I could, if I felt like trousers, I damned well could! I like this modern era most of all. So much acceptance is out there. So maybe we were there all the time, hiding in the corners and edges, being “confirmed bachelors” and hanging around a certain type of crowd. But it isn’t as bad now. We have larger numbers, we’re more connected now, with this whole, internet, thing. Its easier to find a community, even as... Well. -Ashe, the Asexual Vampire
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Text
Jealous (ITA Special)
Loki x Reader Avengers The Office AU (Slowwwwww Burn)
Season 2 Bonus Episode
Warnings: none.
Word Count: Jealous Loki was requested by anon. I don’t know who you are but let me tell you this. I practically wrote this with all my senses closed. Tight. Shut. Just wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote and still kept writing even after I felt I was pretty tired. Don’t know what came over me. It just came out and spread all over here by the mere thought of not writing
MASTERLIST in bio, darlings. Tags are open (check bio)
The halls tonight were barely lit but Loki could see why there wasn't much need for the lights in here. The people present in Tony Stark's gala were enough to set the entire estate ablaze. No. Wait. Scratch that. Tony Stark alone was enough to set the Avenger's facility ablaze. The rest of the crowd? The rest of the crowd was just a bonus, adding twinkle effects to the star that was grabbing everyone's attention.
But as it went without saying, Loki himself was grabbing a lot of eyeballs, stares following the man who was looking dapper as the most delicious sin that ever walked in a human form on earth. Both men and women could not keep their eyes off this perfection surpassing Greek Gods- the ones that were supposed to be the epitome of perfection. A lady was even heard cursing 'oh fuck me' out loud as he passed her with a knowing smirk on his face, clearly making her suffer breathlessness for the next few minutes.
The music was quite well for his taste. Loki had to admit, if anyone knew how to party, it was Stark. No one made the best of entertainment like this man.
"Oh come on!" He heard a familiar voice gasp in his direction from the bar. "You really don't want me to win any bet against you, do you?"
Loki watched Scott reflect despair on his face as he gestured at the God with utter disappointment. "You were supposed to put in minimal effort, man. Do you understand what minimal even means? Standing there looking all hot and sexy. Making straight men and lesbians question their sexuality!"
Javier stood next to Scott, taking Loki's entirety frame by frame from head to toe with his camera. Peter, who was watching all of this unfold while eating deconstructed spring rolls, leaned in to whisper to Javier to 'keep today's recording in a safe. You have no idea how much some people would pay just to watch him in a suit.'
"I just put the first thing I got my hands on, Scott," Loki stated, leaning over the bar and gesturing the bartender for a drink that neither Scott nor Peter understood, "not my fault if I am devilishly handsome by default."
"Yeah well the devil's not helping right now when I have placed my bet against you."
Loki smirked his smirk, making the guy behind the bar nearly tip the glass off the edge before hurriedly stopping it from falling. Peter looked into Javier's camera to mouth 'wow' before turning back to Loki and Scott.
"How nice of you to show so much confidence in Y/N, Scott."
Scott jumped at Natasha's voice coming from right behind him, turning to find the assassin dressed in a red gown that hugged her curves with the will of a fish trying to survive on land in a small pond. She herself was catching quite the looks- making a lot of ladies wonder whether what they were feeling was envy or just pure excitement between their legs.
"Of course, Scott," Loki added to Nat's sarcastic statement earlier, taking a sip of whatever mysterious sweet intoxication he had ordered, "give Y/N some credit to wager she could look better than this."
"Okay," Nat interrupted him with narrowed eyes, "you better stop being so smug, Loki, and start thinking about what would happen she kicked your ass."
"Really?" Loki and Scott asked in unison. The latter got Nat's elbow in his gut.
"She's much more powerful than you think, Gourdy," Nat divulged, "you really should give the credit where it's due."
Loki found himself chuckling before his tongue darted out to wet his lips. "You really think the woman who was literally dragged out by you and Wanda to go get herself a dress for this ball will actually take the time and effort to look better than a God? It's good to dream, Natasha but only to a limit."
The green eyes looking at Loki did not stir for a single second while multiple gasps came out from the guys surrounding Loki. "See?" he whispered close to Nat, "even these men agree."
Now it was Nat's turn to smirk and tilt her head, her eyes reflecting a mixture of pride and sympathy. She stepped closer to Loki, taking his tie in her fingers and straightening it. "They are not gasping in awe of you, Loki," she whispered slowly, giving the God time to register every syllable, "they are gasping at the audacity of me winning a bet. Once again." She finished him with a wink before letting her eyes go behind him.
Loki, confused and egotistically pinched, turned around to find how exactly Nat won the be-
Oh. Oh!
You stood on the stairs, a sight fit for Valhalla. No. You were too majestic even for Valhalla. The green flowing over your body like a green stream finding its way down your body to fall with the most sophisticated rush. The straps holding your dress went to the back to twirl around a golden ring and come back down by the waist, leaving your back bare. Your hair was loose unlike the rest of the time, framing your face in light and shadow that was catching more than just Loki's heart. On one side, next to your chest were two green stones cut to perfection, glittering with the dim lights and catching everyone that even had you in your field of vision.
Loki stopped short of breathing, letting the beats from Alina Baraz's Pretty Thoughts fill every sensation he felt in those next few moments.
You stepped down the stairs, letting the slit in the dress expose your legs to the light that felt like it existed just so it could shine on them. Your grace when you pulled a strand of your hair behind your ear, exposing the golden earring twisting and dangling down your ears, wanting to touch your shoulders but being denied the pleasure of doing so. Your movement, as you swung your hips when you walked- a sight that was making so many souls stir at the sight in front of them. Too much heat. Somebody crank up the AC!
Someone out there responsible for the tunes seemed to sense the change in the surroundings by your mere presence, turning to the much more sedated and bass-filled version of Can't Take My Eyes Off You, giving the curious eyes a tune to feel their emotions.
Loki, once leaning ever so casually over the bar suddenly had to unconsciously feel the weight on his legs when he watched the smile on your lips painted nude- a shade of transparency- while your eyes glimmered with a playful smoke- a hue of everything that is delightfully shameful. But that was not what hit his heart through his eyes. It was you being stopped short by a man unknown, taking your hand and giving it a light kiss before making you laugh.
Loki felt something inside him twitch. To add to that, every pair of eyes standing next to him- along with that camera- turned to watch him like a bundle of curious hawks.
"Who's that?" Loki tried to sound casual while he took a good swig of his drink.
Nat looked at the man his eyes were pointing to- the one who was bringing you to tears from all the laughing fits he was giving you- and quite reluctantly let her lips leave the straw she was drinking from to speak. "Oh! That's Rhodey's nephew, Matt. He's a wildlife specialist. He removed a species of whales from the endangered list."
Loki, Scott and Peter turned to look at Nat with furrowed brows. Nat raised her fingers before she could hear their thoughts. "No! He did not kill them!"
They could see Matt bringing his hand forward for you as a sign of some formal request.
"Do you think he's asking her for a dance?" Scott whispered over Loki's shoulder.
You were already giving your hand in his, allowing him to walk you to the centre of the room where other couples were dancing.
"Oh my God, they are dancing!" Scott whispered again, catalysing this uneasy feeling rising in Loki's nerves. "Oh my God his hand is on her waist. Oh my God, it's going over her back. Her bare back! Oh m-"
"I can see that, Scott," Loki broke, "I can see all of it, thank you very much."
Scott raised his hands like a white flag, taking a step back as Loki turned around to watch you while the former turned to the camera to mouth his shock.
Loki could see that Scott was right. Matt had his hands on your bare back, holding you close to him, closer than one needs to while dancing- that too in such a formal setting. Clearly, that man did not know the etiquettes of the ballroom. Loki scoffed internally for thinking you would have a better taste in men after your last failed relationship. Right? You could at least show interest in men who knew how to treat their dance partner. Know their footwork, how much to move while you moved, how much to step back as they twirled you and let a mirage of a snake coiling up and over your shoulder with green eyes rest on your right shoulder be created while doing so.
Wait...
What?
Loki was not hallucinating. It really was a snake. When you twirled and let the lights shine on you, your dress created a phantasm of a golden and green snake running up your being. It was incredibly marvellous- partially because of the intricate design and mostly because he knew Thor had told you about his childhood snake stories this week.
And yet whenever you landed back in Matt's arms, something inside Loki seemed to squeeze. His eyes were not ready to leave the stranger's hands on your skin.
"Anyone can save whales. I don't get what's the big deal about it anyway." Loki did not realise those words leaving him. Nat raised her brows at him while Scott and Peter exchanged knowing glances with each other and the camera, Javier smiling like goof behind the lens.
"And isn't he too young?" Loki took another swig of his drink- before making a face at how disgusting it tasted- and turned towards others, trying not to lose your sight in the crowd. "He must be a little one like you, Parker."
"Wow," Peter exclaimed his hurt with crossed arms.
"He's...he's as old as Y/N," Nat said after a quick mental calculation.
Loki could feel something inside him feel like falling from a great height as Matt dipped you before bringing you back up, all in one full smooth swoop.
Crack!
Scott and Peter felt their eyes pop out at the cracked pieces of glass sticking in Loki's hand. Nat too had turned to look at the source of the sound. But she, unlike the two men, just furrowed her brows. "Oh, you've glass in your hand."
Loki broke out of a trance from her words, turning to look at the remnants of his drink running out of the broken shards of the glass while the rest were stuck inside his hand, blocking both the blood from rushing out and the skin from healing fully.
"Oh," Loki, much to the surprise of Scott and Peter, seemed unfazed by the whole situation, "I must have held on to the glass too ha-"
"Oh my God! Loki!"
Javier was nearly scared away from the group when he heard you shout from behind him, your eyes- carrying the look of horror- stuck on the pieces stuck in Loki's hand while your body moved on its own towards Loki, taking his injured hand in yours. "What the he- where's Bruce?"
Loki stood there for a moment- which seemed to stretch into infinity- to look at the lines of worry rising all over your face as you tried to get napkins after napkins to stop the blood from dropping, all the while asking him if he was okay. He could see the genuine concern in your eyes on watching him get hurt- the trembling hands trying to be steady just so they could help his. He saw. And he felt; felt much worse than he did before. Why?
Because he clearly could not see you in pain. Being happy with a stranger was far better than the sight of you losing all the glow in you.
"I'm fine," he finally uttered, trying to calm your anxious heart, pulling out the shards from his other hand like it was no big deal.
"Are you shitting me right now!" you announced, grabbing his better hand and pushing it away from his other before pulling it towards the door. "You're coming with me. Come on."
And so, you took him away from the party, up in Bruce and Tony's lab, asking Friday's help for it all, who was happy to walk you through the process of letting her take care of the rest while you stood beside the God and watched the AI work its way around the smallest pieces stuck inside his skin while you bit on your nails.
"I uh-" Loki cleared his throat- "didn't realise you were the competitive type."
You looked up at him, your nail still resting between your teeth, your eyes still in a concerned trance. "Huh?"
"You really went all out with the whole...theme," he mentioned with a smirk, gesturing at your ensemble, making you look down at your dress.
The forceps took out the last bit of glass, sanitising Loki's hand and the workbench when looked back at him, nodded casually. "Oh yeah. Yeah, I was just channelling the irritating snake always hissing around me all day all night, pestering me with those googly eyes and big...noodle body. That's what I was going for."
...clearly not what Loki was thinking.
"What...what snake?"
You turned your lips and spoke with the most nonchalant air, "You."
Silence.
You pressed your lips, carefully taking your steps back towards the door.
"You-" he moved his now fully healed hand away from the bench to look at you with tanoffended expression- "little-" he stepped towards you, mirroring your careful pace- "minx-" dashing out the door behind your squealing figure roaring with laughter outside.
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multific · 5 years
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Soulmates
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Harrison Osterfield x Reader
Soulmate AU!
Summary: Soulmates are real. But only men can feel them from the moment they see their partner. Women will only feel the connection when they get kissed by their soulmate.
 You envied men. It was so easy for them, they could just find their soulmate with one simple glance. Meanwhile, you, you had to wait.
It really sucked. And the fact that there were people who used this to get one night stands, disgusting.
You often wondered, why couldn’t both parties feel connection at the same time?
Why did women had to wait?
Gays were probably the luckiest.
Lesbians tried and many succeeded.
It felt like everyone was good at finding their partners, except you.
Every friend of yours found theirs already. Some even had children by now.
And there you were an office worker, alone in front of your desk. You wanted to find happiness, as did everyone else. But you weren’t desperate, there were times when you looked at other and envied them for their happiness, but it was only a natural reaction. You worked your way up in the company while others were having dates and weddings.
You felt like you achieved everything you could in regards to your career. You were one of the most important people in the building, you worked directly with the CEO who respected you in many ways.
Your income increased to the point where you got yourself a rather fine way of living. You bought everything you ever wanted. A house, a pet, designer clothes, after many years of using public transport, you finally had enough of the people and bought yourself a car and many more.
You lived the high life. But you worked for it.
You had a weekend off and decided to go to a nice spa hotel and relax, refresh and have a great time alone, away from work, family, friends and the amount of people that lived in the big city.
The hotel that you choose was in the mountains, had amazing view and the rooms were to die for, with a personal pool to every room, during the winter they had warm water in it, so the guests can use it.
Sounded like the perfect mini-vacation after working so hard.
The only problem was that you had to drive for four hours, up a mountain and the whole road was slippery due to the winter weather.
You drove always very cautiously.
It was your last ten minutes and you’d be finally at the hotel.
You were to cross a small village, turn left then a bit more forward and finally, you’d be there.
Unfortunately, when you stopped to let a pedestrian cross, the car behind you couldn’t stop in time and bumped into you. It was nothing serious since it wasn’t coming fast. Your car started to call the authorities, but you stopped it from doing so. You pulled the handbrake on and after you took a big breath, to calm yourself, you got out of the car.
The guy from the car behind you was already out and expecting the damage. When he noticed you, he stopped for a second then he immediately rushed to you.
“Are you hurt? I’m so sorry Miss, I saw you stop and the road is just bad and I couldn’t.”
“It’s all right. Things like this happen, the important thing is that no one is hurt.” you offered him a small smile.
Was he blushing?
“I’ll give you my insurance, one moment.” he got back to his car to get his details while you waited in the cold. Thank Gucci for those amazing fury warm coats. You got your phone to drive down his details before he came back.
Lucky for you the traffic in the village was very light, so you didn’t have to move the cars and you could speak there.
“Okay, my name is Harrison Osterfield, and my details are…”
“Got it. My name is Y/N Y/L/N. I’ll give you a call when I get an estimate and then we can figure things out.”
“S-sure. Thank you for not getting mad.”
“I kind of expected it. You know, slippery roads, new car, it was meant to happen. And I just knew that I wouldn’t be able to drive my new car without something happening to it.”
“I’m really really sorry.” he looked very apologetic and the fact that he was cute helped a lot with your calmness.
“I said its fine. We are not hurt, and that’s the most important a bumper can be replaced.”
After that, you took a few pictures and then both of you said your goodbyes.
Other than the minor incident, your weekend was perfect. The hotel was amazing. You had massages and even got yourself a nice manicure-pedicure treatment.
All in all, it was worth it.
But you couldn’t stop thinking about the guy. Harrison.
He had a nice accent as well. He was English and those eyes. But you couldn’t figure out why was he so shy at one moment than in the next so confident.
As you thought about it, he was only shy when he…
looked at you.
You sat up in bed.
“Don’t tell me. Is he my…. No.” You convinced yourself that you just imagined it.
He couldn’t be your soulmate, right?
***
Three days passed, and you finally had your estimate.
When you told about the incident to your boss, she laughed at the situation. But then she told you that she met her husband during a meeting. He accidentally spilled hot coffee on her and he apologized with a date. She got a kiss from him that night, a simple peck on the lips and it was enough. She felt the connection since then.
“Soulmates are interesting Y/N. Especially, how you meet them. Because even if your first impression of them is bad, they will steal your heart with a kiss.”
She also said that she hoped that it is him and you finally found him.
You texted Harrison during your lunch break.
Hey, it’s Y/N. I got the new bumper, I sent a picture of the bill, but you don’t have to worry about it. You seemed genuine and the accident wasn’t truly your fault. You don’t have to pay me back for it.
It only took him about five minutes to reply.
Hi! It’s Harrison, sorry, I’m at work right now. But I cannot leave you with that bill! I’ll pay for it, but I cannot give you it at once, can we make out a plan or something for weekly or monthly payments.
You thought about it for a second, you really didn’t want him to pay it, it’s not like you’d go bankrupt or anything. It just meant that you couldn’t buy the new fridge you wanted this month.
Can we meet somewhere? I’d rather speak in person. When do you finish work? I can get off early so I’ll be able to leave around four.
Maybe this way, you can find out if your assumption was right or not.
Sure! Meet me at…
***
He asked you to meet at a small café shop. It was a very cozy café with flowers and small decorations.
You sat down and soon a waiter came to pick up your order. You read his name tag.
Tom. And he had the same British accent as Harrison.
“Welcome to our shop, my name is Tom, what can I get you?”
“Do you have any specialties?”
“Yes, our cappuccino with vanilla or if you prefer tea, we have a new green tea from Singapore.”
“I’ll take the coffee please.”
“Sure, any dessert to go with it?”
“Yes, please, I’ll leave it up to you. Thank you.”
“Okay, I’ll be right back with your order.”
Tom arrived back with your coffee and a slice of cake in a few minutes.
Harrison said that he would get off of work at five. You checked the time, it was a quarter to five.
You looked around the small café one more time, you noted the counter and all the different cake, cupcakes, and cookies on display, they were all Christmas themed, since it was near. You wished you’d known about the café before, you’d have loved to see the Halloween decorated ones.
You happily ate the delicious cake, but you didn’t have to wait long, as you saw Harrison walk out of the kitchen wearing an apron.
He smiled at you.
“Hi”
“Hi, so you work here!”
“Yes, I’m one of the owners and the pastry chef.”
“Really? Then I must say that this cake is the best I have ever had.”
“Thank you.”
Then an awkward silence came between you two. You went back to drink your coffee.
“So, about your bumper, I have to take responsibility. It was my fault that I bumped into you, I knew the road was slippery and I didn’t keep my distance.”
You offered him a smile.
“It’s fine, really. It wasn’t that bad either, you don’t need to stress it.”
“Yes, I have to! It was my fault! And I saw the bill, don’t tell me it wasn’t bad.”
“You see, I earn enough to afford it, I wouldn’t have bought such a car otherwise…. You know what? How about you pay me back, but not with money!” his eyes suddenly widened and that’s when you realized how bad your words sounded.
“No! No! Don’t think about that. I meant like… Bake me a cake, please. For Christmas. You see, we will have a little party in the office, and I bring the cake every year. I used to make it, but since my promotion, I don’t have much time so I just ordered it from a place, but it wasn’t too good. So, how about you make me a Cake for ten people, some cupcakes and maybe if you have the time a few cookies?”
“That’s…That’s a great idea, but it isn’t the value of the damage I caused.”
“Stop worrying about that! So, give me the goodies, and we are even fine?” you held your pinkie out for him as a promise. He, a bit hesitantly, but agreed in the end.
***
On the day of the party, he said he would deliver the sweets himself, so now you were waiting for him to call so you can pick it up.
But of course, meanwhile, your lovely co-workers were teasing you up and down about him.
“Is he cute?” many asked, and the answer was always, very.
Then, you got his call. You took the elevator and surely enough, he was standing right in front of the building with boxes in his hands.
“Harrison! Hi.” you called when you noticed he was paying more attention to the height of the building then you approaching him.
“Wow, you work here?”
“Yes.” you thought that he just realized how different the two of you were. Him, owning a shot and you working for a huge business, literally.
“I brought you everything you asked for, I’ll help you bring them in.” he said after he was finished admiring the tower, but as he turned his head and looked at you, he noticed that you weren’t wearing your usual clothes. It was a more casual look on you, and he liked it. “You look beautiful,” he said before he can even think.
“Thank you!”
During the elevator ride, silence was between the two of you, with only him and you there, you wondered if it would be fine to ask.
“H-Harrison, can I ask you something?” he looked at you, facing him, you took in his gorgeous sea-blue eyes. You blushed a little.
“Sure.”
“Is-Am I… how should I ask this? Are we- what flavor is the cake?” you couldn’t do it.
“Oh… Chocolate and vanilla.” he looked, disappointed?
The elevator came to a stop.
“OH Y/N’s back! And look she brought someone!”
“Yes, this is Harrison, he made the sweets for us.”
“Good, good. Now, will you stay and celebrate with us, Harrison?”
“I don’t think he wants to, but if you do…it is fine…”
He ended up staying. Thankfully no one mentioned that they knew who he was. Harrison looked like he enjoyed himself.
You didn’t notice the time and when it was time to leave, you offered Harrison a ride, which he took.
So now, you were in the car with the man you thought might be your soulmate, other than that, you barely knew anything about him, but the way he looked at you, you wanted to find out the reason behind it.
“Turn left here. We are nearly there,” he instructed.
“Okay. Oh, you live close to the shop.”
“Yeah, it’s more convenient this way. That’s it with the blue fence. You can stop there.” he pointed at a parking space.”
After you stopped you thought he might get out fast and just forget you, but no, he just sat there, deep in thought. Finally, he decided to speak up.
“You know, I never found it to be fair. This whole soulmate-thing. I always wanted that both men and women would feel the start of the connection at the same. A-and that day, when I ran into you, I just wasn’t expecting it. For it to happen this way.” he let out a laugh, you decided to just stay silent and let him finish. “Leave it to me to find you like this. I was terrified, running into such a car, I thought I will pay with my life. But instead of a thug or some mobster, you got out and smiled. Now I know what that feeling is when others say ‘they just knew’ because I did too. When I saw you… I just knew. You think I’m weird right?” he laughed at himself. He didn’t expect an answer though.
“No. You are not weird. I somehow knew as well. Just the way you’d look at me, it was pretty obvious, but I didn’t want to let myself believe in dreams. But now, you confirmed them for me.” you smiled at him a genuine, sweet smile. He finally looked at you.
“What did you think of me when you first saw me?”
“Honestly?” he gave a nod, yes. “My exact thoughts were ‘Wow, it’s not fair for a man to have such beautiful eyes.’ and then I went to your shop. And I felt like it was just like you. With the flowers and plants. That baby blue wall. The pictures on the wall. Even the dark wood for the display. It was like a piece of you. But we can only be sure if you kiss me.”
He started to lean over and close his eyes. But you stopped him.
“Not here, mister. Maybe bring me on a date, Friday? Sound good? At eight? How about the park near here? They have a really good bar there, the wine and the cocktails just amazing.”
“Yeah, right sorry. I’m the man, I’m supposed to say these things.”
“Who says?”
“Um… masculinity?” you laughed at his answer.
“Right, so drinks there and maybe but only if I truly like you, you can kiss me in front of the pond.”
You looked into his eyes and they were full of determination. He wanted to prove a point and make you like him, even before the soulmate connection.
“Fine by me. Be prepared to be blown away. I’m quite the romantic type.”
“I’m more than ready. Text me.” you said as you kissed him on the cheek.
“I will.”
***
Friday evening came.
It was currently almost midnight and you may or may not be tipsy with Harrison helping you walk straight. The problem? You were a rather horny drunk.
“I told you the wine is gooood.”
“I was. But it was expensive as hell.”
“Yeah, my taste is rather… what’s the word?”
“Fancy?”
“YES! Fancy, like me.”
“Sure is, Love.”
“Oooooh, do that again!”
“Hm?”
“Call me Love again and I will lose my panties right here, right now. With that accent and lipppps and eyes. How can you be real? WAIT are you an alien? Did someone sent you for me?”
“No, Love.” he whispered the last word into your ear, making you shiver in the winter evening.
Suddenly you stopped, but Harrison didn’t notice for a minute. The next thing he knew your hand was inside his jacket’s pocket.
“Where to now?” you asked.
“To the pond. You said I can kiss you there.”
“I said maybe Mr. Gorgeous Eyes.”
“Is there anything else you like about me besides my eye colour?”
“Hmmm…. Lips, jawline. But you are funny, I nearly peed myself in there. I like how much patience and affection you have for others and me. And I also happen to like your butt. OH OH and those biceps….hmmm.” you let out a sigh. “HEY and what about you, what do you like about me? Since it seems like you are already connected to me.”
He started walking again before he answered.
“I love your laugh. Your smile is beautiful it brightens up the room. I love how smooth your hair looks even if I never touched it. And you know. You are so fucking sexy, it drives me wild.”
“Gooood. At least I know Chanel is worth its money.”
“Oh please, even with a paper bag on, you’d look like a Goddess.”
You didn’t even notice that when he stopped this time, it was right by the pond. You blushed a little.
No words were spoken after that. There was no need as he leaned down to your level and captured your lips with his.
It was a simple kiss. Like a looong peck.
And that’s when you felt it. As soon as his soft lips connected with yours, your heart also did with his.
The feelings confused you a little. It was love, passion, lust, affection, and longing at the same time.
When he pulled away all you could do was look into his eyes, the moon and the lights around the park reflected on the surface of the pond which gave his face light. Only a second passed before you pulled him in for more, but this one was different. This one was full of passion. This was a kiss between two souls who had finally became one.
When you ran out of breath you pulled away from him, he gave out a groan of dissatisfaction. You hugged him with your head on his chest.
“So this is how it feels like.”
“Pretty good right?”
“Amazing.”
A few minutes of hugging passed and you became tired.
“Can you take me home?” you asked him.
“Sure, where do you live?” you lifted your hand and pointed at a skyscraper.
“Up there.”
“Very funny, Y/N.”
“I’m not joking! I live THERE!”
“So, you are telling me that you drive an expensive car around, have designer clothes and you live in a penthouse up THERE?”
“Yessss, and I love you.” his heart skipped a beat.
“I love you too. Let me kiss you again.”
You didn’t need to be told twice.
And after another hot kiss, you pulled back and started to walk away from him.
“It’s cold, let go home.” you said as you stopped and turned back for him. You put your hands into your pockets and waited for him. When he mimicked your movement and placed his hand into his pockets, you smirked and started to walk.
Harrison became confused, something was in his pocket. He couldn’t help but look at the thing with opened mouth and round eyes.
A thong.
“I told you. Calling me Love without any consequence? I think not.”
He placed the clothing back to his pocket and jogged to catch up to you.
“Love” he whispered into your ear, as you turned your head, he gave you a final kiss.
Soulmates or not, you definitely loved this guy.
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notthefilmreview · 4 years
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So...I’m obsessed with NEVER HAVE I EVER now and I’m not mad
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Hey it’s Dana and I’m procrastinating my school work (because even the lockdown can’t stop my teachers from giving me work - how great!) so I’ve decided to watch a bit of the new Netlfix series NEVER HAVE I EVER which (after a google search) I found out is created by Mindy Kaling!
(However, by the time this post goes up I’ll probably still be procrastinating but for a whole different set of school work! Yay for me, I guess!)
I actually really have no idea what it’s about except for the fact that the title is a game I used to play with my friends to find out some gossip about their love life and vice versa which was often uninteresting because we never really had much to say. In conclusion, American High School romances have lied to me all my life about games like Truth or Dare and Never Have I Ever (it’s either that or me and the people around me have just lived fairly uninteresting lives...sounds plausible).
Anyway, read on to read about me reacting to NEVER HAVE I EVER the series for the first time!
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Let’s just take a moment to appreciate how pretty Devi is; her hair is goals; orange is her colour; she has such a cute smile; she is thriving! 
Also, I do love the religious diversity and the Indian representation.
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Hahaha! Okay this first scene is quite funny and the arm hair thing is so relatable if you have dark hair; I envy people with lighter hair!
But, what is it with people and always wanting to be invited to parties??? They’re seriously not that fun and I often leave with a headache and an empty stomach. At first, they are quite entertaining but after a while (when you’ve told every single story about what you did in your summer holiday and stuff about your dog) you’ve run out of things to say and just awkwardly stand there until someone - and there is always someone - finally mentions school and now you’re that group of people talking about school because there’s nothing better to talk about. Or maybe that’s just my experiences with parties - I don’t know (I haven’t been to many lol).
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Hey, that’s Mona from DC’s Legends of Tommorrow!!!! Omg! is this why she left the show???
Ahhh and Devi is not only a Hindu and an Indian-American but she is also a wheelchair user - Mindy is out there just trying to give everyone all the representation we need!
Oh - so she managed to walk again after trying to see a hot boy’s chiseled jawline behind a car? Hmmmm...seems plausible.
I’m also getting a really 80s vibe that seem quite common in Netflix movies and tv shows (like Sierra Burgess Is A Loser) but I know it’s meant to be in the 21st century.
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Lol I’ve never heard that before but it made me choke on my food. Imagine people bullying you and calling you the UN - the political slander, the international slander. Omg I love this show so much.
I don’t really thinkl Devi should care if Ben thinks she’s unbangable because she is only 15 so she doesn’t exactly need to have banging as her number one priority.
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Yassssssss strut queen!
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The heels things is extremely relatable; I’m already a clutz while walking in flats but when I put on heels I’m falling all over everywhere (you should’ve seen me dance at my Year 11 Prom lol). Devi is wearing really high heels - I seriously could never so good for her!
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So Paxton just says yes to having sex with her? What? Is this how it works? Is it that easy? 
I’m so confused.
So I’m thinking that maybe there’s something more to Paxton than meets the eye. Maybe he’s a shamed virgin (which isn’t really as much of a problem as Hollywood tries to convince us) or maybe he might do a 360 and publicly shame Devi.
What I know, is that Paxton might end up having feelings for Devi after this (because this is how romance works, guys). Also, Devi might back out of having sex with Paxton.
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So we’re onto episode 2 which is titled “...had sex with Paxton Hall-Yoshida”, making the title make more sense to me now.
Devi is casually just reading After which coincidently is also on Netflix (marketing strategies?).
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*Love is in the air* (I was waiting for LGBTQ+ representations and I know this may cause some conflict with Devi’s plan for them all to get boyfriends butttttt in the long run, once Fab comes out to the gals they’re all going to accept her - at least I hope).
That blonde girl is too cute with her pixie hair cut omg I already love her so much and I haven’t even heard her talk.
This is the only love at first sight that I accept (this and The Half Of It, of course).
(Also the blonde’s eyebrows are beautiful; I want them so much).
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This is the guy from Supergirl who played Lena’s old scientist boyfriend (and ruined all our lesbian Lena backstory but I did like him as a guy).
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I like how Devi’s PTSD over her dad’s death is really being explored slowly.
Also, I knew that Devi would back out of having sex with Paxton and why does she always get cuts on her on her legs? is this symbolism? to do with her leg? and her mental state? am I reading too far into this?
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Let Kamala be the beautiful biologists she deserves to be without an arranged marriage with a man whose family just wants her to be a wife.
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We also shouldn’t forget how Devi’s mother’s feeling after her husband’s death. She may seem so strong on the outside but we all know she’s breaking on the inside and I hope that her and Devi can have a heart-to-heart about that.
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Personally I think the blue ones...
Awww I think Paxton’s sister (Rebecca) and Devi are going to become good friends and I’m excited to watch it happen ahhhhh!
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I’m thinking that Ben and Devi are going to become friends which would be quite sweet considering their rivalry.
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Ohhhhhh Kamala has an asian boyfriend??? I’m officially attached; we need to end this arrnaged marriage; she needs to be with her boyfriend.
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Awwwwww this is beautiful. I love Devi’s mum so much, she deserves love and attention.
Okay so we’ve now met a more human side to Paxton with him explaining that he’s been quite protective of his sister ever since she was adopted. And they’re not going to have sex (even though Devi told her friends that they did have sex) which is really going to cause major conflict.
Anyway, I should probably actually do some work now so bye!
MAJOR EDIT: So it turns out that I did work for about half an hour then decided to watch the rest of the season without reviewing as I go (because I was even lazy to do that lol). I did not think that I would actually finish the whole season in one go; I thought that I would just watch the first couple of episodes until it felt too awkward to watch the rest. Nevertheless, I watched the rest of the the season and I already want a new season to come out so badly!
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Firstly, let’s deal with Paxton. 
So I thought that Paxton would make a massive U-turn and start being less of a douche (as his sister Rebecca - who is just so deadpan with him that I just love her more and more - puts it) and more of a sweetheart who has some type of depth to him. Yes, he does seem to have depth in the way that he’s not just some hot guy on the swim team who’s always mean to everyone because he is usually nice and doesn’t forwardly go out of his way to bully anyone (and I also give points for the fact that he is half asian and not a nerd because we need our dumb asians to replace London Tipton in our hearts). 
The problem is that I’m just confused about him. Why does he always come to Devi’s aid whenever she’s in trouble? What is his purpose? Why does he turn up at her doorstep when she doesn’t answer his text messages? 
I’m particularly confused (and also extremely worried) about that last question because it’s just weird and uneccessary to turn up to someone’s house when they don’t answer your messages. Maybe I would have let him off if he did it once but this guy does it soooooo many times that it’s started to become a bit creepy. Like chill. Seriously. Not everyone is constantly on their phone to text you back instantly and sometimes I’ve even not answered for a couple of days but you don’t exactly see anyone knocking at my door like “hey, Dana, answer my texts - I wanted to know what fucking ice cream you like”.
Basically, it’s just creepy and I feel as though they’re trying to use that to use that as him essentially developing feelings for her but now he needs to lay off because Devi’s got her eyes on Ben now.
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Okay so Ben is what I’m excited for now. The next season will most likely focus on their love triangle and maybe devlop Paxton more to possibly make us really confused on who Devi should choose. Personally, I think she should choose Ben at the end of the day. 
Ben started off as Devi’s nemesis and I never really paaid much attention to him at the start because I thought he would just be there for a bit of comedy and to push Devi out of her comfort zone. It turns out that he has pushed Devi out of her comfort zone, in a different way of course (but when they kissed and the camera started panning down I thought they they were actually going to start having sex and I was like omg, whoa, I shouldn’t be watching this but also it would kinda be fulfilling to see Devi choose to have sex with this guy who actually wants her and actually likes her in that moment, fully forgetting about Paxton - it was actually just panning down to another call from Paxton).
I did see a glimmer of something between them but I thought it was just going to be a friendship to add to her group but I’m not mad at how it actually ended.
I feel as though we as the audience will route for Ben more because of that episode that completely centered him, which showed us just exactly how hard Ben’s life is. It was this episode and the Model UN episode that made me think that they might make this a thing (and there was also the fact that he tried to kiss her twice at his house).
It’s also an added bonus that Devi’s mum thinks so highly of Ben because it means she probably won’t have to hide him from her. While, yes, dating a guy who your mother doesn’t like (such as Paxton) is a symbol of rebellion and thriving outside of your family’s hold sometimes it’s not the right option if they turn you into someone completely different. Ben and Devi have this relationship in which she can be her complete self around him and not have to hold anything back or do anything in order to please him. They challenge each other, trust each other (especially with Ben driving her all the way to Malibu and STAYING), and understand each other to a level that Paxton just can’t seem to relate to.
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Kamala’s breakup with Steve seemed really out of the blue with her really trying to stay away from an arranged marriage, to plain falling for the guy on the other end of the arranged marriage. Although she did say that she doesn’t want to marry yet I’m still really confused on why she dumped Steve but told Prashant that she likes him. I feel as though it would’ve made a bigger impact if she told both guys she didn’t want them and wants to focus on her aspiring career as a biologist.
I say that but I do see the sparks between Prashant and Kamala with them having a lot of things in common.
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I want to end this fairly long review of the entire season 1 of NEVER HAVE I EVER talking about this girl right here, an absolute legend, a queen, the girl who wear a white suit to a sleazy high school party: Fabiola.
This girl is such an icon and her gay panic after summoning (yes, summoning) her whole family to tell them she’s gay (only to end up telling them she switched from AP French to AP Latin) made me both laugh so hard and feel so much pain for her.
When she finally told her mum that she was gay, I panicked. I had to mentally prepare myself to watch this woman shout, cry, question - even disapprove - of her daughter. Instead, what we got was a mother who accepted her daughter and told her that she’s only ever wanted to make her happy. It just made me realise that all that time her mother spent trying to get into her daughter’s love life (after thinking she had a boyfriend) was her version of trying to bond with her daughter and understand her and basically just be a mother.
Well, you know what, she is doing a great job as a mother and I’m so happy for Fab because I know when her mother finds out about Eve (if she hasn’t already) she is going to try and get all the gossip from her daughter and try so hard to take her shopping for clothes that’ll make her look good for dates with Eve (and I am thriving for this).
Her mother’s approach almost reminds me of the mother from Ackley Bridge (if anyone knows that show) who tried to get to know what being a lesbian really is like for a girl by going to one of the most gay areas in the UK. That was just an iconic moment and if you haven’t seen Ackley Bridge go watch that because it’s really good (at first though, after a while it gets a bit trash and you’ll understand).
I hope that season 2 comes quick (but it may not be for a while) and fingers crossed Ben and Devi are endgame, Kamala sorts out what she wants in life, Eleanor finally has a stern talk with her mum, and Fab and Eve finally become official (unless they are already) and we see a story more focused on them.
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docholligay · 5 years
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All Ears
I wrote this “going through a box of childhood items” at I think it was @keyofjetwolf‘s suggestion but now I can’t remember anyway it is deeply self indulgent listen Fluff is really hard for me. 1600 words, the rest of the my OW universe is here. 
Tracer had brought over the boxes to Winston’s slowly developing house, a former warehouse on the edges of what was still a commercial and shipping district. He was making it warm, slowly, as he had money here and there, but money was hard to come by in these days, as good as he was at repairing cell phones and laptops and other such things as the work came by. He’d thrown the money he had into making a room for Tracer, when she’d been recovering.Her family had helped him where they could, of course, but none of the Oxton clan could be accused of being secret millionaires, and so the bulk of his house still had a rather cool air to it. 
It felt more so, now that Tracer was no longer living there, but it made him feel ashamed to say it. It wasn’t fair to Tracer that he had so little in the way of connection, and that he relied on her so much. It was silly, really. He had been protecting her, when he told her she didn’t have to work, that she could stay with him as long as she wanted to, that he was worried about her. But he had also been protecting himself, he knew, and his great fear of loneliness. 
But Tracer had gotten tired of sitting at home, eventually, and managed to talk her way into a job at a little suit shop selling men’s and boy’s fine suiting and accessories, and her boss was even quite impressed with her sales, given as he’d never thought of courting the lesbian market. Tracer had a way of making people feel optimistic and bright, simply by her own sunshine, and optimistic brightness led people to buy extra ties and shoes. 
Eventually, she had done well enough to move back into her little house, and finally resolve to clear out the bedrooms and make the master hers. 
It had been awkward for her, in those brief years after she had come back the first time. She had come home, and her father had been dead, and she had found herself unwilling and unable to clear out what had been his bedroom her entire life, never mind that hers was so much tinier. She was away from home often with Overwatch, anyhow, and it had been a convenient excuse until Overwatch had been forcibly disbanded, and she found herself as much a regular Londoner as she’d ever be. 
So, it was time to take over the master. 
Winston thought this project might be met with grief and sorrow, but he had forgotten Tracer’s natural sense of cheer, and how she could simply roll all of this forward with every other major adjustment she had made in the last year. She had decided not only to clear out the master, but to reorganize the entire place to be more a house that was hers, instead of a house she and her father had shared for twenty-six years, and she had done all this with a sense of embracing the new rather than mourning the old. 
But she did like bringing boxes over to Winston’s when she found them in a closet or the tiny, dank cellar, as if it gave her some pleasure to have someone to relay the memories to while deciding how to proceed. Winston liked it, because he liked to spend time with her, whatever the reason, but there was something he particularly loved about imagining the little girl she might have been. 
And so today, sitting on his couch with a box between them, simply marked “Lena” in what Winston had come to know as her father’s handwriting, was a pleasant enough day indeed. 
Tracer dug through the box. Most of it had been fairly unremarkable. There were a few worn sweaters she had clearly loved--Tracer had laughed when they got to the light blue one with a yellow plane on it, and told Winston how her dad had to hide it from her as it became a crop top--and some old drawings, a few stuffed animals that were not Biscuit and so didn’t matter. They’d chuckled and sipped on a few beers as they’d gone through it, but she broke into a bright smile when she took out a pair of Mickey ears, her name embroidered in looping font on the back of them. 
“I ever tell you about the time me parents surprised me? Took me to Disneyland in Paris?” She was asking the question, but it required no answer, in the way she often asked a question more of herself than anyone else, and so Winston merely shook his head, “I’s four years old, and Mum and Dad told me we was going to the zoo. I loved the zoo, went a few times a month, Mum would pack us an ‘amper, off we’d go. We was walking to the tube when me Mum drew these out of ‘er bag and told me we was going to Disneyland. We was going to ‘ave tea with Alice, even.” 
Winston took a sip and smiled, imagining her vibrating with joy, grinning so hard she might hurt herself. “What did you say?” 
Tracer giggled and leaned toward him as if telling a secret. “Burst into hysterical tears immediately.” 
“What?” He gave a low chuckle. 
“Right then, wasn’t quite as emotionally self-sufficient as I am now.” She laughed again. “Just too excited, too much surprise for me to ‘andle in that moment. Poor Mum. Dad picked me up, asked me what ‘ad gone wrong, and I sobbed out,” she laughed again,”DADDY, I LOVE ALICE SO MUCH.’ ‘e tried to keep a straight face, but me Mum started just creasing up, she did.” 
Winston looked at the tiny ears and smiled. “I’m sure you got over it.”
“Oh, we ‘ad a bloody brilliant time, once I’d calmed down a bit. ‘Ad the whole train ride to Paris, mind, and ‘ad a biscuit or two, so, came out all right.” She pulled out a plastic cup that read ‘Alice’s Tea Party’ and looked at, smiling softly, “They’d just found out Mum was sick, wanted to take me before she ‘ad treatment. Glad they did.” 
Winston placed his hand on her back, but she sat up straight and grinned. “Was when they figured I’d be just brilliant as a fighter pilot, given me total lack of fear on any ride I was big enough for. Loved the thrill best of all.” 
He wanted to share something with her. He envied the way that she had these things, that she could share so much of herself with him. He loved to think of her as an excited little girl who got to meet Alice, to see her carefully drawing a scene from Wind in the Willows for her mother, to imagine her father secreting away that patched and stained and too-small sweater. 
Winston had none of this. He had narrowly escaped the colony with his own life, much less any mementos, and at least that made the conversation easy. He never had to explain that there would have been few to take. Winston was a test subject, and while he believed Dr. Harold had loved him, there were no surprise trips to Disneyland, or regular trips to the zoo, or even any clothes outside of what was given to all the subjects. He had learned math and science, not how to draw badgers or toads. And so he had nothing to give Tracer but what he was now, nothing to communicate how deeply he felt about her and how much he wanted to share with her. 
Tracer set the ears to the side, deciding that they were the one thing she would keep from the box, and stuffed the rest back into it. She tilted her head at Winston, studying him, her eyes darting around as she had a thought. 
“Win, ‘ave you ever been to Disneyland? Paris’s only a few hours away, bet we can find a place to stay, too, right?” Winston realized with a mix of nervousness and love that this was one of those times she was asking a question to herself only. 
“Lena…”
She leapt to her feet. “Right! Win, I ‘aven’t been in years, and you’ve never!” She stood up straight and patted his shoulder. “So I get to be the one to show you. I wonder if they do Alice’s tea sti--no, wait, what would you like, Win? The very least, they still ‘ave a Mickey breakfast.” 
Winston shifted, biting his lip. “I didn’t really ever do childhood things.” 
She jumped up next to him on the couch and hugged him as tightly as she could. “So you’ll them with me.” 
“I--” 
He wanted to go with her. He wanted to go, and he knew if anyone could make it a reality, it was Tracer. But he thought of the park, and of the children, and how they might cower against their parents as he walked by, and a grey sadness came over him. 
Tracer jumped over his lap and knelt in front of him, looking up into his face. “What is it? You love it when we do thing together.” 
“I don’t want the kids to be afraid.” 
He said it softly, afraid if he put any strength behind it, that deep fear and sadness might be exposed, a fresh scab pulled off the wound. 
“Win,” She smiled and shook her head, “if there is anywhere on earth, that kids will be expecting a big guy like you to be a friend, it’ll be Disneyland, right?” 
He thought for a moment, considering her reasoning, considering her love, considering her fierce will, and smiled, hugging her tight. 
“Right.”
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