#entirely and utterly and completely wrong? what then. so yeah uh have this. sad puppy eyes gale @ astarion. tired old man. poor thing.
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it was fun to goad you. you get this little knot between your eyebrows.
@vampiheir | Meme {Accepting!}
â A deep sigh escapes Gale before he can even think to contain it, one which carries with it a slight air of suffering. Truly, long-suffering sighs were becoming more commonplace by the day, though that hardly surprises him any longer. Alongside the sigh, his hand makes its way to massage his brows before briefly covering his eyes.
"That's your motivation, then?" His question is asked in the driest tone which Gale can muster among the exhaustion seemingly always creeping up the edges of his consciousness. "You find enjoyment from, what is it then, visible annoyance on my face? I realise that we don't agree on everything, but must you find fun in bothering me? Or is that really it, the only reason you speak to me at all? Because if so, that hurts. " His hand has left his eyes, though still finding itself busy scratching at his beard, as he looks to Astarion with those tired, almost watery eyes that have almost taken up permanent residence in his expressions.
#finally posts a singular answer. is still very self-conscious about my writing. always happens with new muses. what if i get the voice#entirely and utterly and completely wrong? what then. so yeah uh have this. sad puppy eyes gale @ astarion. tired old man. poor thing.#vampiheir#{ gods you're distracting; aren't you? } â [ answered. ]
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jon/martin, game, for your prompts thing?
Characters: Gerard, Martin, Jon
Pairings: Martin/Jon (Kids with crushes)Â
Warnings: None! Itâs a Martin and Gerry are cousins and go on vacation and run into Jon when theyâre kids au!
Summary: Martinâs Mum needs a day off and leaves Gerard in charge, but Martin really wants to go to the beach. Gerard helps Martin get Jonâs attention.Â
AO3: Link
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âI just need one day out.â
âIs there any⊠emergency numbers or⊠anything?â Gerard asked. His Aunt strode adjusting her dress and grabbing a glittery purse.
âYouâre sixteen, Gerard. You can handle it.â
âYeah, butââ
The door of their little hotel room shut. She didnât hesitate.
Gerard sighed.
Stuck in Bournemouth on âvacationâ with his aunt wasnât the ideal summer. Mother hand shunted him off because of some sort of contact that got twitchy about strangers. Even sixteen-year-old ones apparently. He had been eager at first. Getting to live in the âreal world.â It only took two days for the sparkle to wear off. The real world was boring and ignorant. Having his aunt go out might have been a relief exceptâŠ
âMum said we could go to the beach today.â
Gerard turned. His nine-year-old cousinâs round freckled face was crestfallen.
âShe can take you tomorrow,â Gerard said. âHavenât you been going all week?â
Martin looked down utterly disappointed.
Gerard had never spent time with his younger cousin before. The boy was tall for his age, chubby, and painfully shy. He looked like he should be frolicking in a field somewhere. Beside Gerard it was almost comical how sunshine and rainbows the kid was. The entire trip Martin had been trying to be helpful for his mother. He didnât demand for anything. He did as asked. He tried to talk to Gerard a few times, but stumbled over his words.
Honestly Gerard didnât really have any sort of interest in him, but⊠it was hard not to feel bad. The only thing Martin seemed excited for was the prospect of the beach, which is apparently what you do when you go to Bournemouth. Everyday this Aunt gave a huffy sigh and took the boyâs hand off to sand and surf. She asked if Gerard wanted to come. Gerard declined. He was happy enough to bum cigarettes off the hotel staff and walk around the place.
Being stuck inside with a mopey nine-year-old no matter how well-behaved didnât sound appealing.
Gerard sighed. âFine. Get your stuff. Iâm not going in though so you better actually know how to swim.â
Martin looked torn. âMum saidâŠâ
âThat she was going out and I could handle things. We can either go, or stay here all day. Up to you.â Gerard crossed his arms.
âYou wonât tell?â
âNot if you donât.â
Martin nodded his face splitting into a grin. He ran over to his already laid out items for the beach. Gerard grabbed the pack of his Auntâs cigarettes. Payment for babysitting.
âReady?â
âYes, Gerard!â
âAlright.â
â
It wasnât too bad. He lit a cigarette and sat on a towel. He was too hot in his dark clothing, but didnât want to take off his coat. Martin splashed in the shallows and seemed to be having fun, although every so often he would look around as if he were waiting for something to happen.
Still, good deed done and all that. Gerard set himself down for a long boring day pulling out his cassette player and putting on his headphones.
He came back into awareness noticing a skinny kid wandering down the shore unaccompanied by an adult. He looked about Martinâs age, maybe younger. He seemed unbothered by his lack of supervision. After surveying the beach he plopped himself down in the sand, and opened the book he was carrying. Hm. Weird.
Martin seemed to have noticed the other boy as well. Gerard watched as his little cousin slowly advanced. The bookish boy didnât take notice, completely absorbed. He jerked up, startled when he finally saw that Martin was standing over him.
Martin said something.
The boy said something back, shaking his head.
Martin spoke again.
The boy wildly gestured as if to emphasis his book.
Martin nodded and backed off looking sad as soon as he was behind the other boy. He was headed in Gerardâs direction.
Gerard brought down his headphones. Huh.
âWhat?â
âNothingâŠâ Martin sat down in the sand beside him. He kept looking in the skinny boyâs direction. Martin had a hand on his round cheek, completely focused.
Gerard looked between the two boys.
âSoâŠâ Gerard said. âWhoâs that?â It was a sign of how bored he was, but still, he was curious and he wasnât known for locking up his curiosity.
âJon,â Martin sighed wistfully.
âOh,â Gerard said nodding. âJon.â
âDoes he come to the beach often?â Gerard asked already taking a guess.
âUm⊠um yes. Yes, sometimes,â Martin admitted. âHe comes to the beach to read.â
Gerard didnât quite know what was happening. He didnât interact with children his age much, even when he was Martinâs age.
âAre you⊠friends?â That didnât seem right.
âOh, no. Well⊠maybe⊠I uh⊠he likes to read.â
âHe doesnât want to build a ⊠sand ⊠castle or play or something?â
Martin shrugged. His gaze didnât leave âJon.â
âIâm going to do you a favour,â Gerard said slowly, âBut there are rules.â
âHuh?â
âYou stay in this area and meet me at the parking lot at six. You have a watch right?â
âAre you leaving?!â Martin seemed to be about to protest.
Gerard saw a waterproof Mickey Mouse watch on his cousinâs wrist.
âDo you promise or not?â
Martin nodded, still frowning.
âAlright. Pretend you donât know me, and when I steal his book tell me to get lost.â
âSteal his what?â Martin yelped.
Before he could stop him Gerard got up, brushed the sand off himself and strode over to the skinny kid. He bent over and plucked the book from him.
âHey!â Jon looked up at him glaring. âThatâs mine.â
âMine now,â Gerard said, no sympathy in his voice. As an unsocialized goth with a mother that didnât necessarily care about his behavior Gerard had had his share of bullies. Heâd like to think he could pull off the attitude pretty well.
âHey! Stop it!â Martin protested running up behind him. âLeave him alone!â There was an upset blush on his face.
âGet lost, kid,â Gerard told him.
Martin looked like he just might, not quite understanding the ruse, but he landed on more anger than fear.
âNo! Youâyou get lostâleave him alone and give his book back!â Martin demanded.
Gerard lifted his hands and rolled his eyes. âFine, whatever kid.â He tossed the book and Martin fumbled, but managed to catch it before it fell on the sand.
âLosers,â Gerard added as emphasis and walked away.
âAre you alright, Jon?â Martin asked sounding utterly concerned. Gerard maybe should have explained the plan better. He wasnât that convincing was he? Oh well, it did seem to work.
âFine,â Jon said stiffly. âIâm⊠itâs fine Iâm used to it.â Â
Martin gasped a bit.
âYouâre⊠Martin, right? Thank you⊠IâI could have handled him, but still⊠I appreciate it.â The kid talked like an old man.
Gerard was too far to hear them anymore. He was used to surveillance so he set himself up aways off the sand on a giant rock. He kept an eye. It wouldnât do for the both of them to run into an actual dangerous person⊠or something else.
Looking out over the ocean Gerard could think of a dozen terrifying things that could make quick work of two little boys, but it seemed Jon didnât have a swim suit. He took off his shoes and he and Martin ran through the shallows, collected seashells, did the little kid stuff Gerard never got to do.
He lit another cigarette. Rather than bitterness he found himself feeling happy on Martinâs behalf. All his shyness seemed to dissipate with Jon. Jon seemed to do a lot of the talking and Martin hung on his every word. Both boys were smiling the whole time.
Martin was late to the parking lot, but Gerard didnât mind.
âSo, how did it go?â
âWhy did you do that!?â Martin demanded. All the shyness and fear he had towards his older cousin was gone with his indignancy.
âHe wasnât going to stop reading,â Gerard shrugged.
âThat doesnât mean you get to bully Jon!â Martin said.
âI wasnât really.â
âYou stole his book!â Martin said like it was the most vicious crime Gerard could have committed.
Gerard started walking back towards the hotel, Martin followed although still tried to chew him out⊠like a puppy with a shoelace.
âAlright, alright,â Gerard waved his hand. âI promise I will not interfere with you and your Jon again.â
âIâŠâ Martin hesitated. âIt was wrong.â
âSure,â Gerard agreed.
âBut⊠um⊠donât do it again, butâŠâ
âYouâre welcome, Martin.â
âI justâI just like him a lot,â Martin said in his own defense. âHeâs so smart, and fun. Heâs a local. He lives nearby with his Grandmother. He says he likes to walk around and explore, and that the beach had been his favourite place latelyâŠâ
Gerard snorted. The kid was besotted.
âSo are you going to play with him again?â
âUm⊠yes. He said⊠he did say heâd be there tomorrow too, and that heâd probably finish his book tonight so we could maybe walk together on the beach for more seashells. He knows the names of what came out of them. Mollusks.â
âFascinating.â
âIt is!â Martin insisted.
âAlright, alright.â
They got back with plenty of time before his Aunt got back. Martin changed out of his beach clothes.
âUm⊠Gerard⊠thank you for taking me today.â Martins said formally. He sat up on the bed.
âSure,â Gerard shrugged. It was honestly nice. Even if he missed out on his own childhood it was sort of nice to see stuff like that really existed. That little Martin didnât have to worry about studying dead languages and balance between fear entities. That his only worries were getting the attentions of his first crush. Heâd grow up, live a nice normal life and not have any of the worries Gerard has, and that did ease a bit of Gerardâs own bitterness at his situation.
âDo you know anything about mollusks?â
ââŠNo Martin.â
#kidfic#tma#the magnus archives#martin blackwood#gerard keay#jonathan sims#jonmartin#fanfiction#cousin au#agnesmontague
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little spoon
To save money while attending college in NYC, Stiles and Derek decide to rent one tiny apartment together. With one bed.
*whispers* I have no idea if any of this is realistic. Donât judge me.
You guys know by now that practically everything I write is so so fluffy, but this is just like, a whole other level. A little over 4k words of enemies-to-lovers, bed-sharing, & cuddling. ;) Â
on ao3
*
The thing is, Stiles is pretty sure he can't afford to breathe the air in New York City, let alone rent an apartment there. But it's also been his lifelong dream to go to NYU, same as his mom, and heâs just gotten his acceptance letter in the mail along with a hefty scholarship offer. So he has a bit of a conundrum on his hands.
Enter Derek, who has a (relatively) dirt cheap apartment in Queens.
Okay, so Derek calls it an "apartment." Stiles calls it an "attic closet."
It's nothing but a narrow bed, a foot or so of walking space between that and the wall, and a lone shelf by the door to hold the microwave and all of Derek's possessions that can't fit under the bed. There's not even enough room to open the door all the way; the edge of the door hits the edge of the bed, and then you have to shimmy into the room.
The sad thing is that Stiles can't even afford that.
He can, however, afford half of it.
"So you're going to share a bed," Scott says, looking concerned.
"Yes," Stiles says.
"No," Derek says at the same time.
Scott looks more concerned.
Stiles sighs. "Okay, so it's like this. Derek's going to be doing the whole normal person schedule, up at the buttcrack of dawn" (Derek rolls his eyes) "and out working and studying and stuff all day and back in bed asleep by 11 pm, and I'm going to be taking all evening classes and working the night shift!"
"We won't actually ever be in the same place at the same time," Derek clarifies. âHe gets it during the day; I get it at night.â
"Because we can't stand each other," Stiles adds, in case Scott is thinking of getting his hopes up that this whole roommates thing is going to be some kind of bromance.
(Scott has always doggedly hoped that someday his best friend and his brother would stop hating each other, or at least stop finding each other intolerable and annoying. If it were anyone but Scott, Stiles would laugh in their face. As it is, he tones it down to a skeptical eyebrow raise.)
âIt just makes sense, economically,â Stiles goes on. âDerekâs not even using his room half the time, so now, instead of letting it sit there empty and go to waste, he can make money from it by letting me have it. Itâs logic, pure and simple. Weâre gonna save so much money.â
âUh-huh,â Scott says.
Whatever. Their plan is foolproof. Stiles made charts and schedules and everything. At most, there'll be a few minutes of overlap in their schedules. Easy. Nothing could go wrong.
*
Week One goes swimmingly.
Granted, there are a few hiccups, like the fact that Stiles never realized from the photos Derek sent that the ceiling was so low he physically wouldnât be able to stand up straight in the room, but the whole occupying-the-room-at-different-times thing? That goes off without a hitch.
Every morning, Stiles gets home from work and kicks Derek out of bed. Derek makes protesting noises while Stiles pokes him (or, rather, pokes the lump of his body under the covers) with his bare foot. Eventually Derek crawls out, wearing nothing but black boxer briefs because itâs kind of hot in here and they donât have AC. Then he squeezes past Stiles to stomp down the hall to their tiny bathroom, and Stiles determinedly looks elsewhere because getting a boner over a glimpse of Derekâs flexing thigh muscles is something he would never live down.
Stiles sets about tossing Derekâs pillow on the floor and replacing it with his own, because heâs very particular about pillows, and then he wiggles around a lot and sighs and reads ebooks on his phone until Derek leaves. Sometimes he buries his nose in the sheets for a while, too. They still smell like Derek, and Derek smells good, like pine trees and manliness. (What? He can think Derek smells good and still hate him. He has depths.)
After reading a while, heâll have calmed his brain down enough to fall asleep.
His alarm goes off at 4 pm, which gives him plenty of time to get ready for the day, grab a coffee, and get to his first class without ever seeing Derek, who wonât get back to their room until 5 pm at the earliest.
Itâs the perfect living arrangement, and Stiles is a genius for thinking of it.
*
Week Two starts with Stiles' boss asking him to switch to the morning shift, and Stiles begging him to please not do this to him, and his boss utterly failing to yield to said begging.
âBeg some more,â Derek says, completely unsympathetic, when Stiles tentatively reports this news to him the next morning.
âYou canât tell me what to do,â Stiles says. Itâs too late to go back now anyway. Stiles has decided the best way to switch his body clock back to normal is to not sleep at all today so that heâll fall asleep instantly tonight. To that end, heâs just finished drinking a mug of coffee the size of his head. Now heâs so saturated with caffeine that heâs pretty sure heâs vibrating. His normal day-sleeping is definitely not happening right now.
âYouâre going to have to live somewhere else, then,â Derek says.
Stiles makes a show of checking his empty pockets. âOh sure, let me just go get all my huge piles of cash that I keep lying around and Iâll get right on that. And in the meantime, I just wonât sleep at allââ
Derek makes a face and tugs the covers up to his chin. âFine, I wonât kick you out. But youâre not sleeping with me tonight.â
âLook, itâs not like I wanted this to happen, but⊠I pay half the rent, so I get half the bed. Themâs the rules.â
Derek makes another face.
Stiles pulls out the big guns. âIf you donât let me in that bed tonight, Iâm calling Scott, and heâs going to give you the sad puppy eyes over skype, and youâre going to feel like a terrible human being and then youâre going to give me half the bed like you owe me.â
âFine,â Derek growls. He throws his pillow at Stilesâ face. âBut donât touch me. You stay on your half of the bed.â
Stiles rolls his eyes. âWith pleasure.â
*
It starts out as disastrously as one might expect.
Derek throws off heat like a furnace, but he complains when Stiles hogs the covers. Then he complains when Stiles gets too hot and kicks off the covers so they pile up on Derek. Stiles canât win.
Also, it takes Stiles a while to find the perfect sleeping position, and Derek complains every single time Stiles moves because it always means he accidentally brushes Derekâs arm or leg or torso. Itâs not like Stiles is trying to touch himâbecause even if he does think Derek is objectively pretty okay-looking, heâs still Derekâbut itâs physically impossible to get any farther away from Derek without falling off the bed. Stiles is already balanced on the very edge, and Derek has already wedged himself up against the wall, and thereâs still no space between them.
It takes them both ages to fall asleep like that, and in the morning Stiles wakes up to find that in his sleep heâs rolled over onto the floor, twisted up into a cocoon in all the blankets. He has a sneaking suspicion from the bruise throbbing on his lower back that someone kicked him off the bed in his sleep. Derek, meanwhile, is starfished out on his stomach, comfortably taking up the entire mattress.
The second night goes slightly better, but only because theyâre both so exhausted from last night that they both fall asleep practically instantly. The good news is that Stiles doesnât fall off (or get kicked off) the bed again. The bad news is that he wakes up to pins and needles in his left arm because Derek is crushing it between his chest and the mattress in his sleep. It takes all Stilesâ strength to wiggle free, and then he does fall on the floor.
The third night, Stiles has one of those fueled-by-sleep-deprivation ideas. âLook, weâre both vaguely triangle-shaped, yeah? Because weâre both broad-shouldered dudes. So itâs stupid to try to fit two triangles facing the same way into a rectangular area. How about I stay up here and you move so your head is at the foot of the bed and then weâll both fit and you wonât fall asleep on my arm again?â
Derek says heâs not going to spend the whole night with Stilesâ stinky feet in his face.
Stiles says his feet are not stinky, thank you very much. He has amazing hygiene.
Just to drive the point home, he rubs the sole of his bare foot on the back of Derekâs calf. Derek hits him with his pillow. Stiles hits him back with his pillow. Things devolve from there.
Stiles is pretty sure the only reason they fall asleep after that is that they've worn themselves out from arguing about feet, and that's not exactly a sustainable plan for successful bed-sharing.
*
"Have you tried building a pillow wall?" Scott suggests when they skype next.
"I don't think there's room for that," Stiles says, stifling a yawn in his sleeve. A good nightâs sleep is but a distant memory at this point. "Also, we don't have enough pillows."
It does give him an idea, though. Maybe a crazy idea, but... it could work. It's worth a try, anyway.
When Stiles was little, he always slept with this one pillow his mom gave him. It was bright green and shaped like a dinosaur. He couldn't go to sleep unless he was hugging it. He didn't outgrow the habit until he was in middle school and lost Dino on an overnight class trip to Disneyland.
Maybe what he really needs now for a good night's sleep is to hug Derek.
No... cuddle Derek. Spoon him.
They obviously can't keep trying to share a single bed thatâs barely big enough for one grown man, let alone two, and keep to a no-touching rule at the same time. It's just not working. So maybe the solution is to un-taboo the touching thing. Embrace the touching.
He thinks Derek would be a good cuddler, what with all the body heat he throws off, and all the muscles. Stiles wonders if well-muscled people are nice to lie on. He thinks the answer is probably yes.
And maybe Derek needs it, too. He's always been a tactile kind of guy, from what Stiles has seen. He still remembers when they were little kids, really little, and Derek's mom used to call Derek "the hug monster." He was always going around hugging everybody, and at nap time he always wanted to hold Stilesâ hand.
That was before Derek grew up and became such a grump, obviously.
Maybe, Stiles thinks, Derek would be a little less of a grump if he got to cuddle someone every once in a while.
*
That night, Stiles waits until Derek has climbed under the covers and then scoots close. Derek's on his side, so Stiles is left facing what little he can see of Derek's bare back in the dim light: his muscular shoulders, held stiff with tension, and a hint of the dark, thick lines that form the triskelion tattoo between his shoulder blades. It's an appealing, if distinctly unfriendly, view.
"Hey, Derek," he tries in his friendliest tone, the kind he normally never uses around Derek, not after a lifetime of mutual antagonism.
Derek grunts and tenses up even more but otherwise doesn't respond.
Stiles isn't entirely sure how to put his idea into words, at least not without getting his head bitten off for it. He's tempted to just throw an arm around Derek's waist and see what happens. On the other hand, he doesn't have a death wish.
He also kind of has to wonder about the ethics of initiating cuddling with someone without getting their consent first. Spooning isn't kissing or sex, nothing that invasive, but... Stiles could see it probably falling into that same general category of ask-before-touching. He doesn't want to be creepy. He thinks it's something Derek will like, if he can just get over the fact that it's Stiles, but... but that's a big if.
So instead, he taps Derek on the shoulder and says, "I think we should spoon."
"Not funny," Derek says. He sounds bone-tired. "Go to sleep, Stiles."
"That's what I'm saying," Stiles persists. "Seriously. We should spoon so we can go to sleep."
âRemember when I said that thing about you staying over there and me staying over here? Because I do.â
âButââ
"If you don't like the way things are now, you can go sleep on the floor."
Stiles lets out a groan of frustration. âListen, I really think it could work, okay? Itâd probably be relaxing for both of us, and we wouldnât be fighting over the same tiny bit of space on the bed anymore, and, I dunno, you could even imagine Iâm a hot girl if you want, I donât careââ
âNo,â Derek growls. âNot happening.â
So thatâs that. Stiles lies on his back and chews on the inside of his cheek, annoyed.
The night that follows is the worst yet. Stiles sleeps fitfully. He keeps waking up to find heâs too cold because Derekâs stolen the covers, or his neckâs at a weird angle because his pillow has gotten wedged up under Derekâs shoulder, or heâs half on the bed and half on the floor because Derekâs decided in his sleep that heâs going to lie diagonally across the bed now.
When morning comes, Derek looks like heâs fared no better than Stiles. Thereâs something quietly haggard about him, something defeated in the weary slump of his shoulders as he trudges off to the bathroom. Itâs so close to mirroring how Stiles feels that he canât even work up the I-told-you-so smugness heâs expecting.
That night, Derek sighs and puts a hand on Stilesâ arm as theyâre climbing into bed. Stiles raises his eyebrows, because voluntary touching, thatâs new. Especially voluntary gentle touching.
"We can try it," Derek says grudgingly. "The spooning thing."
Stiles grins. âYouâre gonna love it, man.â
His good mood lasts until about two seconds later, when they actually get in the bed and thereâs an awkward shuffle as Derek goes to put his arm around Stiles at the same time that Stiles goes to put his arm around Derek.
âWhat are you doing?â Stiles demands, wiggling away.
Derek furrows his eyebrows. âUh, spooning you?â
âBut Iâm the big spoon,â Stiles says, crossing his arms over his chest. âThat was the deal.â
âYou never said that.â Derek crosses his arms, too, apparently settling in for a long debate. âWho says you get to be the big spoon?â
âI do, because it was my idea.â
âBut Iâm clearly⊠I mean, youâre soâŠâ
Stiles rolls his eyes. Itâs kind of sad that heâs known Derek long enough that he can usually guess what he means just from a few sentence fragments and glary eyebrows. âWow, okay. Way to stereotype here. Letâs get one thing clear: just because Iâm a little skinnier than you are doesnât mean I canât be the big spoon. I can totally big-spoon the shit out of you if I want to.â
âIâm not going to be the little spoon,â Derek insists, stubbornly, flexing his arm muscles a little.
âWhatâs wrong with being the little spoon? You get to feel all hugged and snuggly and cared-for.â
âIf you like it so much, why donât you be the little spoon?â
âBecause I want to be the big spoon!â
âWell, so do I,â Derek says, final, like that settles everything.
Stiles thinks about this for a minute. He really wants this spooning thing to work. Maybe a little compromise is in order. âHow about we switch it around? Tonight Iâll be the big spoon and then tomorrow night itâll be your turn.â
âWhy do you get to go first?â
âGod,â Stiles says, âI didnât realize I was dealing with a literal child here.â
âThatâs not what âliteralâ means,â Derek says, probably just to be petty.
âIâm a pre-law major, stupid. I know what âliteralâ means.â
Derek ignores that. âWe should flip for it. Heads, I get to be big spoon tonight. Tails, you get it.â
âFinally, a reasonable proposition,â Stiles says, and rolls out of bed to go find a coin.
Itâs tails. Stiles grins smugly. Derek huffs and shifts over onto his side so Stiles can spoon him.
At first Derek is a stiff line all along Stilesâ front. Stiles mutters, âCâmon, work with me here, dude,â reproachful, and Derek just stiffens up further. Itâs like trying to cuddle a mannequin or a wooden board, and Stiles thinks with a swell of disappointment that this isnât going to work after all and theyâre doomed to spend the rest of the semester in a mutual sleep-deprived daze.
Then. Then Stiles starts rubbing his thumb over Derek's breastbone in slow repetitive circles, soothing, and the mood between them thaws. Derek relaxes into Stilesâ hold. The air goes out of his lungs in one long, quietly pleased sigh, and he presses back minutely into the curve of Stiles' body. Win.
Stiles doesn't remember what happens after that. The next thing he knows, there's morning sun on his face, making the insides of his eyelids glow a dull red, and he's waking up still nestled lazily around the pliant, supple warmth of Derekâs body.
Stiles takes stock of things. Derek is fast asleep, face burrowed contentedly into his pillow. No one has kicked anyone else off the bed in their sleep or stolen any covers or pinned anyone else's arm under their body in an uncomfortable position. In fact, Stiles is completely comfortable, and well-rested, and fairly sure they've just solved their bed-sharing problem.
*
So the spooning is⊠not terrible.
Secretly, Stiles even starts looking forward to it.
Derek is still kind of an ass to him outside of bed, or at least he's just as willing as ever to call Stiles a slob for leaving a little toothpaste in the sink or forgetting to fold his socks, but once they're under the covers, it's like a truce has been called.
Stiles likes the moment when he first gets in bed and he presses his feet against Derekâs warm calves, and Derek hisses, âJesus, your feet are like ice,â but doesnât pull away. He likes the way they usually talk a little as they fall asleep, Derekâs voice low and soft in his ear, and he likes that they can let their guard down a little, finally, their snark and sarcasm mellowing to something almost affectionate in the dark, when they arenât looking at each other.
He loves it when Derek spoons him, when Derek clasps their hands together against Stilesâ stomach, their legs tangling under the covers, Derek blanketing him protectively with his body. He loves how grounded he feels, how anchored. And Stiles loves spooning Derek in return. He loves resting his forehead against the nape of Derekâs neck; he loves the clean smell of Derekâs hair; he loves the way Derek starts relaxing as soon as Stiles is touching him.
He loves having someone to hold, and itâs not even that terrible, really, that that someone is Derek.
*
One afternoon Stiles mentions his friend Lydia from Philosophy of Law. She was saying today that she might know of a place nearer to campus he could rent, if he wanted. It wouldnât be quite as cheap as this, but heâd have his own room, his own bed at least... Heâs watching Derekâs face as he talks, weirdly dreading that Derekâs going to look relieved and trying to think how he could possibly admit he likes having Derek as a roommate more than he likes having his own bed in a way that wonât scare Derek off.
Derek doesnât look relieved. He looks wary, and then irritated, and then outright pissed, and then heâs snapping at Stiles out of nowhere about something minor and stupid that Stiles never thought bothered him before, and it just keeps escalating, and itâs not like their usual arguments, which are almost fun, playful. Stiles doesnât want to admit it, but this time it actually hurts when Derek calls him an annoying pain in the ass. He can feel tears stinging at the corners of his eyes, and itâs mortifying.
Heâd started to think, with the whole spooning thing, that they were finally getting somewhere, but no. Apparently Derek hates him just as much as ever.
That very same evening, Stiles buys a plane ticket and calls in a couple vacation days at work. Itâs been months since heâs seen his dad, anyway. He could stand to take a long weekend and go home. So he does.
*
It feels like a good idea, all of itâgetting to hug his dad and Scott all he wants and drive his Jeep around town again and eat food other than ramen and sprawl out in his nice, large, unoccupied bed while pretending Derek doesnât exist. Itâs a vacation he didnât know he needed.
At least, until itâs the middle of the night and Stiles has been trying and failing to fall asleep for hours.
Everything is all wrong. First heâs too chilly, and then heâs too hot under the extra covers he hauls down from the closet. Then he doesnât have enough pillows, but when he gets more, his head is angled too high and he has to throw some back on the floor. And through it all, his mattress is too squishy and thereâs this restless feeling buzzing under his skin and he keeps getting the urge to check his phone even though he knows Derek hasnât texted him at all.
Somewhere in the middle of all this, Stiles comes to a terrible, inexplicable realization:
Derekâs shitty bed has ruined him for all other beds.
Fuck.
Then there comes an even worse thought, a few minutes later: that maybe itâs not the bed thatâs the problem at all.
What the fuck is Stiles even supposed to do with a thought like that?
He only manages to fall into a light doze by hugging a pillow to his chest and wrapping himself tight in the blankets. That way he has something to hold and the bed doesnât feel quite so big. Still, itâs not the same at all.
*
When he gets back to New York late Monday night, Derek is waiting for him in the room, sitting on the bed in a t-shirt and pj pants with his knees hugged to his chest. He has dark circles under his eyes.
He doesnât say anything, but they both groan a little in relief the instant Stiles curls up around him under the covers.
âSorry,â Derek murmurs, gently stroking the back of Stilesâ hand with his thumb, right before they fall asleep.
Stiles holds him a little closer. âMe too.â
That night Stiles sleeps like the dead. Itâs awesome.
*
âWhy donât we like each other?â Stiles asks the next morning.
âHabit, I guess,â Derek says, voice muffled where his face is pressed between Stilesâ shoulder blades. Theyâd switched positions sometime last night in their sleep. Stiles has no complaints.
Derek nuzzles in a little at Stilesâ spine and adds, âYou used to be such a little shit.â
âYeah,â Stiles says, grinning at the memories, and at the fondness in Derekâs tone. âAnd you always acted so stuck-up and superior, even though youâre only two years older than me and Scott.â
âBut mentally at least five years older,â Derek says wryly.
Stiles makes a face, even though Derek canât see him. âDebatable.â
He shifts around a little, ignoring Derekâs cute little growl of protest at the jostling, until theyâre facing each other under the covers. Derekâs hair is messy and soft-looking and Stiles just wants to run his fingers through it, so he does, snorting to himself when he canât get it to behave even a little bit. He loves how happy and relaxed Derek looks like this, his skin almost glowing with the sunlight filtering through the sheets.
Stiles takes a risk and whispers, âI missed you this weekend.â
âOh yeah?â Derek slides his hand around from Stilesâ waist to his hip, fingertips ghosting over the skin where his shirt is riding up, and Stiles shivers a little. âI thought you were mad at me this weekend.â
âOh, I was,â Stiles nods. âBut I missed you, too.â He gestures vaguely between them. âI missed this.â
Derek looks at him for a long, quiet moment. In this light, his irises are an impossible luminous green flecked with amber and gold and grey. Stiles feels kind of weird for staring so long, but itâs not like Derek isnât staring back. His eyes trail down Stilesâ face, lingering on his mouth, and then he leans forward and nuzzles in at Stilesâ throat, tentative. When Stiles doesnât do anything except keep petting his hair, Derek nudges in a little closer, his thigh slotting in between Stilesâ, and continues up along his neck to his jaw, stubble scraping Stilesâ skin. He presses a kiss there at the hinge of Stilesâ jaw, feather-light, and then another, closer to his mouth.
âFuck, can you please just kiss me,â Stiles blurts, and Derek huffs out a laugh and does.
Stiles can admit heâs had thoughts, mostly in the shower, about what it might be like to kiss Derek, because how could he not. Heâd always imagined it would be biting and angry, Stiles hitting a nerve and Derek shoving him up against something and just taking. The kind of kiss that would leave bruises.
This, though, this is so much better, because Stiles never imagined Derek could be sweet, could take his time taking Stiles apart, long luxurious minutes of melting everything in him to warm honey and leaving him aching with it in the best way.
âNng,â is about all Stiles can say when Derek finally pulls back.
Derek looks smug.
âOh, shut up,â Stiles groans, trying and failing to fight back a smile. He defies anyone not to look at least a little goofy after a kiss like that.
âI missed you, too,â Derek admits.
âI kind of figured.â
âI was scared you were going to move out.â
âNope.â Stiles pulls him a little closer. âIâm staying right here. You canât get rid of me.â
âGood,â Derek says, satisfied, and leans back in to kiss him again.
They donât get out of bed for a long, long time.
(end)
EDIT: sequel
#sterek fanfiction#later on stiles does take lydia up on her offer of a bigger place#but when he moves out#he takes derek with him#the new place still has only one bed#which is just fine with both of them#my fic
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