#enterthemikeverse

[osha-janitor]

"Alam! Bubbeleh, it's been too long, come here!"

Mike walks up to Alam in... honestly he has no fucking clue what he's wearing. A pirate costume? With a wizard hat? And shutter shades? And why is he carrying an oar?

Too late for questions, Mike has already scooped him up in a bear hug, rendering him too confused to be frightened.

@enterthemikeverse

"A- " Alam lets out a slight squeak sound out of surprise. This is absolutely not what he as expecting for today. "Um."

Alam has no idea how to respond to this, frankly. The outfit alone is giving Alam a hundred questions already.

[thedarkgardens]

Maram hears a footstep and sees Zababa before them. But before they see him, they feel the trademark electric tingle and faint smell of ozone in the air, telling them that this is no trick of their imagination, and no dream or nightmare.

He's holding a cat.

"Hello, Utur, my love... It's been a long time."

All that power and fury... and yet he still looks on them with nothing but adoration.

@enterthemikeverse

Maram freezes. They curse internally, wishing that right here, right now, their body hadn't defaulted to freeze instead of fight or flight. They stare at Zababa, the same feelings they held when they ran flooding back to them. They don't blame the cat, their spice, she'd never do something that she thought would hurt them, but they can't stop the fear in their heart.

They don't know what to say. They don't know what to do. They don't understand.

"... why. uh. are you here."

It's the only thing they can make themself say right now. They know that their racing thoughts and conflict is shown on their face as clearly as if it was written there, so at the very least they don't have to worry about their statement being considered thought out in any way. It's obvious that it's the only thing they could manage to say with all the thoughts racing through their head.

@enterthemikeverse

[groundskeeperosha]

"...Utur? My love?" A man who looks nearly identical to Mike looks at Utur longingly, his starry eyes full of tears. But it isn't Mike, exactly. He has a long, full beard, and wears a plain brownish-white robe, as well as a large, ornate gold necklace.

"I... I can't believe I've finally found you!" He picks Utur up in his arms. Clearly, at the very least, this version of Mike is enthusiastic to see them.

@enterthemikeverse

Utur doesn't struggle against the possibly-a-version-of-Mike, though it's definitely partially because they know they're about to absolutely ruin his day.

"Uh. sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but i'm uh, not your version of utur. wish i could soften that blow for you since you seem really happy to see me, but. i dont wanna get your hopes up." They awkwardly pat his shoulder.

[pick-n-mix-mercenaries]

"Well, what the fuck is this then?" Martein, having nothing better to do, walks through the door. She puts the knife she was playing with away, not knowing what's on the other side.

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[thedarkgardens]

Persephone feels something. Somebody's here who isn't supposed to be here. A mistake. An abomination. Neither dream nor Ngeštugbar, but also somehow both. Zababa has finally made his appearance, as expected.

"...You resemble my child, but you are not them. You are much older."

@enterthemikeverse

"And You Seem To Be A Shambling Monument To Your Own Poor Life Choices, But Generally, I Would Not Start A Conversation With That Observation." Persephone gives him a dry look. "Now, Would You Kindly Explain Why You Are Here, Or Did You Just Want To Make Unsolicited Observations?"

[osha-janitor]

*Kishar is nearby, by complete chance, and immediately hurries over, concerned*

Mike? That Looked Like It Hurt, Are You Alright?

Today in OSHA, several items changed colour without warning.

[osha-janitor]

Alam, having not seen Hermit Mike until he spoke, yelps.

"Gah! Give me some warning - what do you mean it has started?" He pauses. "Wait, no, you are from the future, right? ... I do not suppose you could at least warn me if they. You know. Go all the way?"

Alam's hands are shaking. It's clear he's extremely distressed by all this.

A: Shit. Shitshitshit. This is bad. This is really bad.

[chaos-harbinger]

Mac notices the door and immediately opens it. She doesn't go through yet, instead just sitting on the ceiling in front of it and waiting to see what happens.

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[osha-janitor]

Kishar doesn't hesitate before opening the door. After all, they know all of the doors in OSHA, and this isn't one of the normal ones. Things might need cleaning behind it.

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[pick-n-mix-mercenaries]

Martein's face almost immediately adopts the look of someone who didn't want to deal with anything like this today.

"The where isn't important, what matters is the when, and the current when happens to be from before I've met this version of you. I know you well enough to guess you understand what that means."

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[pick-n-mix-mercenaries]

"Ah, that makes more sense. I don't think I ever meet you, so you must know an alternate version of me, which I didn't know existed. The Mike in this timeline isn't someone I'd ever kill. I've come to realise that I should be more selective with the jobs I take. I only kill people who have it coming now."

She takes a moment to pause and study him.

"If you knew me in my future, you'd also know that pointing a knife at me isn't even slightly threatening, at my vital organs or not. I assume that means the version of me you know can't just die without consequence."

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[pick-n-mix-mercenaries]

"I started doing the bare minimum for my contracts a while ago, and the people here helped me figure out that I can just not take the first however many bounties I see. They didn't mean to, obviously. I'm pretty sure this whole timeline hates me and wishes I never arrived, but that just comes with the job."

She doesn't react to Mike's movements even a little.

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[pick-n-mix-mercenaries]

"I see the other versions of me are a lot more open about their past. Their loss, I suppose."

She sighs deeply, already growing tired of this Mike.

"So, how does this usually go between you two? You stab each other until one of you has to come back from the dead?"

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[pick-n-mix-mercenaries]

"I see… Say, do you know someone by the name of Jackie?"

She stares at him, deadpan, mind completely blank, and intentions entirely unclear.

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[osha-janitor]

"Oh, I Am Not Aphrodite, I Am An Alternate Version Of Them. I Can Try And Contact Aphrodite If You Would Like, Though?" They tilt their head slightly. They do have Persephone's contact details at this point in case of situations like this, so they could call Persephone to bring Aphrodite over. "Ah, You Are In OSHA, I Almost Forgot."

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.

[pick-n-mix-mercenaries]

Martein's face twists into a cruel, sly smile. Without warning, she yells out into the hallway, louder than human lungs should be able to manage.

"Hey, Mike! There's a version of you here that probably kills Jackies! Want to deal with them yourself? You could probably kill me at the same time to sweeten the deal!"

There's a door in the middle of one of the OSHA halls, and it looks noticeably different from the other doors. For some reason, it's also ringing like a phone? Maybe somebody should open it.