#enough for the mirror to start making any makeup fade before he's even finished

[sn0wbat]

Does Einarr have to cut his hair short every time or is it illusion magic?

Because if it’s the former I can imagine him/someone else with similar hair going the barber’s to do that thing where you cut most/all of your hair off so it can be made into wigs for people going through chemo and then coming back the next day to do it again

yeah he just genuinely chops it off because some things are just way harder to simulate with illusions. he already has to deal with hiding/covering up his ears, his red eyes, his skin tone, so when he's able to chop off his hair without much problems (it returns!), of course he will. he has figured out how to do it all on his own without mirrors anyway, so why not.

the time a vampire is able to maintain an illusion highly depends on how much there is to hide - ear size and how nonhuman the skin appears already being huge factors - and well, einarr has quite a lot to cover up due to how much he's changed in appearance since his mortal days.

so at this point he can only keep it up for a few hours - if hair was included here, it would get cut down to mere minutes.

as for being able to donate it.... it's a nice thought, but feels rather overpowered. he's a vampire, not a hair generator, and there's dark magic involved here anyway; what if all the chopped-off stuff just fades away and disappears from the world when his hair inevitably gets long again?

who knows, really.

[timextoxhajima]

Boundary [Dana’s 700 Special]

Track: Fever - Enhypen / TiO - Zayn / Close - Nick Jonas, Tove Lo

➣ Member: my og bias owo

➣ Genre: idol! ju x stylist! [fem] reader

➣ Warnings: swear words and if you squint, some smut

➣ Word Count: i’m like 100% sure it’ll be as long as accelerate [i was wrong it’s nowhere near but whatever]

➣ A/N: Thank you for 700 followers. You are all nothing but amazing ♡

➣ Taglist: @taesty-wander-lust​ @tbzzhoe​ @suzy-rainbow​ 

He’s going to be the absolute death of me.

The thought is loud in your head, and you were almost sure you would’ve blurted it out had the filming studio been empty. Breaking Dawn was blasting from the speakers behind the MV director, experimenting with some strange angles that you’ve never seen any other MV director try with the group before. 

If you thought Reveal was dangerous, this might be worse.

“Okay! Let’s do that hook into the chorus first and we’ll see how that angle goes!”

“Breaking Dawn, I see-”

“Cut! Juyeon-” The director snorts while staring at the monitor from the camera. “That was great but um, we’ll need to rate the video if we release this one.”

Never mind. It is worse.

“Yah, Juyeon!”

“Ahh... seriously?”

“You already have enough screen time, why are you so greedy?!”

The members crowd around Juyeon and shove him playfully as the director films that part from the monitor, and brings his cellphone over to the group to see. You can barely hear the music from the phone, given how far you were standing from the filming area. 

The group of 11 burst into loud yells and frustrated groans, with Younghoon and Chanhee giving their iconic ‘OoO’ faces to Juyeon. The main man chuckles, embarrassed, and shakes his head while waving it off.

“I didn’t intend to make it so suggestive, sorry!”

“It’s alright, that was great, really!” The director assures him. “It’s just that we can’t release that without rating the MV, and you guys don’t really have that kind of reputation yet so, we won’t do that for you guys now. But anyways, can we get a 10 minute break and we’ll pick up where we left off?”

The boys celebrate in unison, Eric immediately rushing off for the washroom, some members going to the staff to ask for their phones, others going for the monitor to check their progress and the remaining approaching their stylists for appearance maintenance.

So, when Juyeon approaches you with that sly-mixed-with-shame smile, you can’t help but to shake your head at him. 

“Really? He asks you to go all out and you look like you want to eat the camera,” Pulling open your little kit, you set it on the table next to you. You pull out the comb and hairspray and start adjusting his hair again - all that dancing’s pushed some strands out of its rightful position.

“Aw, so you agree that I looked good enough?”

“What?” The pitch is higher than expected, but you hope your feigned annoyance camouflages the pinch of jealousy. “Please! The director said it’ll be rated!”

Juyeon laughs, standing with his feet a little more apart than natural for you to have easier access to his hair. 

“Well, you’re the one who did my hair and makeup. If it’s anybody to blame, wouldn’t it be you?” 

His words halt the sharp end of your comb in his hair, and you poke it into his scalp for good measure while puffing out your cheeks. He chuckles it off. 

“Excuse you, sir, Cre.Ker gave me a color palette and a set of reference pics. Ever since they cracked the code with you with Reveal, they just won’t stop with this genre of style on you.”

“I mean... I definitely prefer my current style over what they did to me in Boy.”

The memory cooks up a bunch of images in your head, and you fail to stop the giggle that runs off your tongue when you return the comb to the kit. 

“Aw, come on, that was cute,” Picking up a brow pencil, you fill in the tiny fade-out. “You were, what? 19? No reason for you to look as raunchy as you do now.”

“It’s a pity you only met me just before I become ‘raunchy’.”

“Why? I mean, ‘Juyeon’s not a good boy’ though. Raunchy’s closer to that than what you did pre-Reveal.”

“I meant it!” Juyeon widens his eyes and his brows shift up his forehead just as the tip of the brow pencil lifts off his skin. “I’m happy Cre.Ker’s letting us show what we want to.”

“And I’m happy for you too,” You finish up on his foundation where it’s starting to wear off. “But one day, you’re gonna cross a line and break some hearts.”

Juyeon smiles as you cap on all your equipment and close your kit. Resting one hand on your hip, you quickly give his hair one last poke before he resumes his normal standing position.

“What if I only want to break specific hearts though?”

A frown befalls your face and you forge an ugly look by crooking your lips. “What? Was that an attempt to flirt? Please stop,” Waving him off, you turn and pick up your kit, walking away on your heels as Juyeon tails you.

He’s just practising flirting on me at this point. Best friends and best friends for what? Get MY heart broken? PLEASE.

“Flirt with Kevin if you want, he’ll give you better advice,” You turn to the film area and sure enough, Kevin was busy twerking into the camera and Changmin’s just face palming himself. 

“Oi Kevin! Stahb it!” You yell across the space and Changmin points to you, turning to yell at Kevin.

“Yah, even y/n’s telling you to stop!”

Chuckling, you turn into the dressing room as another hair stylist finishes with Sangyeon in the mirror. 

“Hello sir, you look kinda tired today, are you resting well?”

“Don’t get me started. Schedule’s packed into June,” Sangyeon subtly shakes his head, but his stylist holds his cheeks and shifts his face back to face the mirror.

“Sangyeon, please face the mirror. It’s not my fault if your hair gets messed up again,” The hair stylist grins as he picks up the hairspray.

“Sorry,” Sangyeon blinks at him and purses his lips. Juyeon crashes into the two seater-sofa in the corner of the dressing room and groans tiresomely, resting his head on the top surface of the headrest. 

“Well, you should get some rest before Kingdom kicks in,” You place the kit on the dressing table and sit down in the two-seater next to Juyeon. “It’s not going to be an easy fight, y’know.”

“Right! You used to be ATEEZ’s hairstylist!” Sangyeon’s eyes widen and you can see him struggling not to turn to you directly instead of trying to find you in the strangest angle of the reflection in the mirror. 

“Yeah. Those guys are intense, and I mean intense! Six out of eight are known for performance skills and the other two... one produces 99% of their tracks and the other belts out notes even I can’t reach.”

“You sound like you were sent from KQ to intimidate us-” Sunwoo struts in and waves an annoying finger in your face.

“I’m not-” Swatting his finger away, Juyeon leans forward and pulls Sunwoo’s hand. “I’m just saying for good measure- it’s not going to be easy. Stray Kids is also going to be great competition, not to mention iKON and-”

“AhHH, we get it!” Sunwoo shushes you, swinging his hand with Juyeon’s.

“No matter the outcome, you all need to know that you guys were stellar last year. I was new then, but it was absolutely stunning to watch you guys work and put so much effort into your performances.”

“Oh my God, yeah, you could not shut up about the Danger performance,” Sangyeon cooes, letting his stylist finally finishes and shifts to pack the hair equipment. 

“I’ll bet it’s cause your best friend over here got the most screen time,” Sunwoo perks up a mischievous brow and smirks at you.

Juyeon’s eyes widen and stares at the youngest, “I didn’t get the most screen time.”

“If not you then who?” Sangyeon butts in as he stands.

“Uh... Changmin?”

Sunwoo and Sangyeon go quiet. 

“Yah, you had a good amount of screen time too!” Sangyeon turns and blurts out at Sunwoo, playfully shoving him. 

“Y’all are being loud in here,” Kevin’s head pops out from beyond the door frame, one of his stylists tagging behind him and struggling to pat down his clothes. 

“No, tell me if Sunwoo had more screentime than Changmin in Danger from last year,” Sangyeon wraps an arm around Sunwoo and slowly walks him out. 

“What? I don’t know, Changmin had the opening and the dance break...”

Sangyeon’s hairstylist follows closely, and by instinct, he shuts the door behind him, leaving you with Juyeon in the dressing room. It’s humid, from all the lights turned on in the room, and the leather seat wasn’t the most comfortable thing to sit on.

Turning to Juyeon, his eyes are gently shut, and frankly, he looked like he was about to fall asleep. The backrest of the sofa sinks when you lean back, mimicking his position.

“You have like four minutes left so don’t even think of falling asleep.”

“I’m not sleeping,” He offers a tiny smile on his lips, eyes still shut. 

“Sure, you’re not.”

“Wake me up when the director needs me.”

“You wish,” The leather under your legs squeak when you push yourself off, but he sticks out an arm at your stomach and pushes you back down. Judging by the miniscule smirk on his face, he’s just messing with you. “What do you think you’re doing? I have a job to do and you have a music video to film.”

He remains quiet. Someone shouts at Eric outside.

“You’re being fucking weird today, sir,” You lift a hand and grab his arm to move it away, but he swiftly wraps his fingers around your wrist and yanks you forward instead. 

Using your palms to keep the distance between your faces, you’re hovering above him now, breath on his upper lip. The sweat’s begun to collect in the lines of your palms, stuck to the arm rest by his side and the cushion he’s leaning on. 

Your vision immediately darts to his face upon the bold move, and he’s got that slight smile prancing on his lips when he’s thinking of a joke or something funny and doesn’t want to say it. It’s been a good year of being Juyeon’s best friend (apart from the members), so you’ve definitely grown to know how to read him by his actions.

You sigh, rolling your eyes and removing your legs from next to his thighs.

“Juyeon-”

And then he cuts you off by holding you in position with his arm around his waist, challenging your knees to hold you up - because if they buckled, you’ll land right on top of him. 

“What the Hell do you think you’re doing?” 

Knock knock

“y/n, are you done with Juyeon’s hair? Filming’s resuming!”

There’s an awkward tension between you and Juyeon now, with his eyes wide open and staring into yours, arm still around your waist. But having his nose just inches away from yours and his breath breathing down on your philtrum feels so surreal. It feels like it’s a dream that you’ve failed to pull yourself out from.

He parts his lips, then purses them, and sighs through his nose. 

“Yeah, she’s done! I’ll be out in like, two seconds!”

Your gaze finds his and you’re panicking when he’s moving again. Within two seconds, you’re flat on your back on the length of the couch - and this time, he’s holding himself above you.

“What the- I-”

“We’ll continue this later back at the company, I promise,” Then he rounds your cheek and presses a kiss into your cheekbone instead.

He pulls back, offering you his kind smile and a ruffle into your hair for good measure. Nothing in your body is working when you hear him shuffle for the door, and it clicks shut behind him, with Breaking Dawn already blasting in the filming space.

Sucking in a deep breath, you don’t realise how hard your heart is thumping in your head until you hear your own shaky exhale. You don’t know where to look, you can still feel his grip on your waist and his breath on your upper lip, and everything’s just a mess right now.

What the Hell just happened?

“Eric - Dior Shirt Size M...” You mumble under your breath, fingers gripping the pen to the clipboard so hard, your writing would probably leave a mark in the sheet under. 

“I think this is the last luggage!” Younghoon’s stylist drags the black case in, lining it up with the last unopened one. “Need help?”

“Yeah, just open the luggage for me and separate Sangyeon’s clothes from Jacob’s, but otherwise I can handle it on my own.”

She nods, laying it down and unzipping it for the clothes to spew out. “How’s working here? It’s been over a year, right?”

“Mhm,” You glance at her, obviously tired. “It’s alright, but thanks to your advice since last year, I don’t think it could’ve been better.”

With a kind smile, she looks up at you, placing Sangyeon’s pants over his stack. “You’re experienced from ATEEZ, so it wouldn’t have been that hard anyway.”

She stands, resting her hands on her hips as you walk over, squatting to check Sangyeon and Jacob’s clothes. 

“So... what’s going on with you and Juyeon?”

I’d like to know too.

“Huh?” You look up at her, head tilted to the side with a sneaky cocked brow. “What do you mean?”

“Oh, please- All the stylists here know you and Juyeon are like- hanky panky nowadays. Pretty sure the boys know too, or at least have some idea.”

A cackle runs your throat dry as you graduate your attention to Jacob’s clothes. “Is that what they’re calling it? ‘Hanky-panky’? Cute.”

“Do you know why they’re still in a meeting this late?”

“No, why would I bother? As long as I don’t lose my job, it’s none of my concern.”

“They’re in meeting to be informed that their dating ban has been lifted.”

Your grip around the pen tightens, but halts abruptly. 

“Ah...” She sighs, contemplated with herself. “Cat got your tongue? Or should I say... Juyeon got your-”

Interrupted by the practise room door being pushed open, both of your attentions immediately flit to the new commotion. 

“Oh, Juyeon! Meeting’s over?”

“Yeah,” He turns and closes the door behind him. His hair was still waxed up from the day’s schedule, makeup still on but fading. Clothes snug around his shoulders with his belt tight around his hips. Those stupid jeans never did you any good since day 1. “Sangyeon said he left a ring in one of the luggages so he sent me to come get it while he counsels Kevin for twerking.”

“y/n’s just going through Sangyeon’s wardrobe, so she might find something,” Your colleague’s begun to take small, insignificant steps towards the door, and your anxiety begins to increase with every inch she places between the two of you.

“Which is why I’m here,” He stuffs his hands into his back pockets.

“Right, right,” Now, she’s already got her hand on the door knob, glancing past him and at you with wide, glistening eyes. “I gotta go check your wardrobe for tomorrow so... I’mma go now, and uh... security comes by around 12am. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“What-” You blurt out, receiving a sharp, surprised look from Juyeon.

“Bye! Bye Juyeon!”

“Bye,” He waves. 

“No, wait-” 

And so, the door clicks shut behind her, and her shadow behind the translucent material disappears down the corridor. 

The whir of the air-conditioner in the practice room fills all the awkward openings in the room, but all you can hear is the rapid thunk of your heart in your brain - as if that was even possible. 

Thunkthunkthunkthunkthunkthunkthunkthunkthunkthunkthunkthunkthunk

“About earlier today-”

“Give me a moment while I look for Sangyeon’s ring. What does it look like?” Standing up too fast, your vision goes white and a second of dizziness throws you off your balance.

So, of course, Juyeon rushes over and holds you by your waist before your ankles or knees give way. The incessant blinking makes you wish you could actually pass out right now, because your weight’s in his arms and you can’t bring yourself to look him in the eye.

“Iron deficiency much?” The corner of his lips curl up into his cheek before releasing you. “Do you need to sit down?”

Clearing your throat, you turn away first. “No, I-”

“Good, because I have some points to make and you’re gonna stop running away from them like you’re doing now.”

The change in tone runs chills down your spine and goosebumps erupt all over your skin - thank god you were wearing a blazer, safe from his observation. 

“How have you tolerated it so much?” He folds his arms across his chest, tilting his head innocently but his eyes say otherwise. It’s always his eyes that tell a whole different story from the person he’s known to be. 

“Y’know, being around me but you’re so calm and collected and I just...” He shakes his head, and to your dismay, takes a step forward - which drives you backwards. “How?”

His voice is too sing-songy. It’s too calm and collected for you because you’re about to barf up your dinner, which was a good 4 hours ago now. There’s nothing left in your stomach to barf up. 

He takes another intimidating step and you wince at your inability to look him in the eye.

Another step back. 

“Like, I know we’re friends but my God-” Shaking his head, he sinks his teeth into his bottom lip.

Another step forward. Another backward.

“It’s upsetting that I can look ‘raunchy’ and it doesn’t seem to do anything to you... But seeing you the way you are every other day makes me want to- just-”

Another step forward. 

One more one back.

And your breath halts.

Your back hits the wall, the rear of your skull lined with the pillar. 

Oh, no.

Gritting your teeth so tight, your jaw starts to ache and your temples are throbbing. 

“I’m not seeing things, right?” A flicker of curiosity sparkles in his eyes when you muster up the courage to look at him - only to regret it instantly. “It’s not in my head that you feel the same way I do, right?”

“I... Don’t know what you’re talking about- You’re an idol... and I’m- I’m just your stylist and I-”

“‘Just my stylist’?” The comment forces his brows into a slight frown, before he lifts his hand and covers the bottom half of his face with his palm. “Rethink what you just said.”

Sucking in a deep breath, your chest wells with a horrid mix of desire and self-discipline. Those two don’t go well together. 

“We can talk about this some other day,” You choose to say, dragging your body along the pillar in a bid to shift out from the wall-Juyeon sandwich like a fool. He lifts his arm and presses his palm into the pillar behind you, caging your poor, poor soul in this fateful corner of his stupid practice room.

“Juyeon, we need... boundaries in this industry. One scandal and it’ll destroy your career.”

“Boundaries?” He buckles his elbows, shrinking the gap between your noses. “Boundaries are for idols who still have a dating ban.”

Breathing down your nose, he’s too close for comfort. You can smell his cologne, the scent of his hair wax and see the bumps on his cheek under the faint layer of makeup. You don’t realise you’re trembling until he tilts his head ever so slightly, free hand reaching up to your chin to steady your face.

“Stop running from me,” Shaking his head painstakingly subtly, he whispers into your lips. “You were mine from the start and you know that.”

The adrenaline rush through your nerves sets off fireworks all over you when he slots his body against yours, lips fitted with yours like puzzle pieces; against the wall, with his palms on your cheeks. There was no care or consideration with how much strength he was channeling into this kiss - it feels so pent-up, so frustrated. Without warning, your body resigns as you circle your arms around his shoulders.

Gripping the rim of his collar in your hands, his hands drop to your waist and holds you closer, if it were even possible. A million thoughts race through your head - and at the same time, none. This moment was something you didn’t even know you needed. 

Juyeon’s hands roam the small of your back as he keeps you against the wall, relaxing into the kiss and sighing into it instead. 

This bliss comes in the form of him. Him who provides you all the sinful wants deep down inside you. 

But this bliss doesn’t last, for the practice room door swings open violently and tears Juyeon off you.

“I told you to find my ring, not hook up with your crush!”

[dari-ede]

In the Middle of the Night: Ch. 3

Chapter 3: “Fading in and out of Long Nights”

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Summary: As Bangtan prepares for a new chapter in their lives, they head to their private property in the forest for a songwriting workshop. As a songwriter and producer they have worked with for years, I’m asked to tag along. I was ready for the heavy workload and small amount of sleep during the workshop week. However, I wasn’t ready for the storm that came that changed my friendship with Namjoon forever.

Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut

Pairing: Idol!Namjoon x Female Reader

Rating: M (future sexually explicit scenes)

Status: COMPLETE

Note: There will be a few other celebrities making appearances, but will only be briefly. This is mostly an RMxOC story.

Guest appearance: Jackson Wang (Got7). He'll pop up a couple of times.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been days since the meeting with BH and the guys. I was fully at work on different projects, such as the workshops for the guys and other songs for other HYBE artists. It was around noon while I was finishing a draft when I received a “good morning” message from Namjoon.

Before responding to him, I emailed my draft to PD Bang and CC’d the song’s other producers. I responded to Namjoon and headed to the kitchen. Soon, we were messaging back and forth as I cleaned my dishes.

Me: Try ‘afternoon’, lazy. What time did you go to sleep?  

Moni: 3? 4?

Me: I went to sleep at 2. And still managed to get my ass out of bed by 8.  

Moni: You’re a more self-disciplined person than I am. This is not news

Me: Are you at least out of bed?  

Moni: Yeah just showered

Me: Yuuuum  

Moni: kkkkk. What were you doing? Working?

Even through text Namjoon still got shy and would dodge any flirtatious comments I would make. I could practically see him blushing. As much as I wanted to continue to teasing him, I cut him a break.

Me: A little. I was about to start on workshop ideas  

Moni: I was going to work on them, too. Want to meet up and go over a few things?

Me: Sure. RKive?  

Moni: Yeah I can meet you there in 2 hours.

Me: 2 hours? You live 20 minutes away. It takes you that long to get dolled up?  

Moni: I need coffee and food

Me: I have leftovers from my burrito this morning. Want some?  

Moni: …what kind of burrito?

Me: I can add sausage. It won’t be vegan. I know you like your meat.  

Moni: Thank you!

Me: Meet you there in an hour.  

As soon as he liked my comment, I started on the burrito. I ended up having enough for two. I decided to add more kimchi and rice, knowing Namjoon’s palate preference. After I packaged the burritos, I took a quick shower.

I decided on a casual look so I threw on some jeans shorts with a yellow blouse. Before leaving, I walked to the mirror for a critical look at my outfit.

I used to be a laidback type of girl who didn’t care much for style. My go-to outfit used to be baggy jeans and a simple tee or shorts with an oversized t-shirt. But living in Seoul, made me pay attention to what material and color went best with me. I even accessorized now. However, my makeup continued to be minimal.

I decided on a few accessories and quickly braided my hair. I noticed I was running late, so I hurried out.

The traffic to HYBE was a bit heavy; I arrived later than I would have preferred. I managed to get out of HYBE elevators and to Namjoon's studio with two minutes to spare. Namjoon was usually early, so I was surprised to find his studio locked. It was rare when he ran late. I took off my shoes as I waited for him.

No more than a minute later, I heard footsteps coming down the hall. I glanced up and saw it was Namjoon semi-jogging towards me. He was wearing khaki shorts, a sleeveless white shirt, Nikes, a black bucket hat, his signature silver hoop earrings, a working bag over his shoulder, and an iced coffee at hand. He certainly had come a long way since his chain-wearing, mohawk hair, and heavy eyeliner days. Back when he was lanky and his arms were thin, but now strutted around like some bulky hunk.

“Sorry,” he said, snapping me away from drooling over him. “Were you waiting long?” He took off his shoes and unlocked the door.

I decided to mess with him. “Like ten minutes. Your burritos are cold,” I said as I waved the small bag in my hand that contained his breakfast.

He reached down and gently took them from my hand. He leaned in several inches until I was at eye level with his hooded, brown eyes. A warm quiver made its way down my back. “Liar,” he accused. “I saw you running into the elevator from the front lobby. You beat me by a minute.” He pulled back as he opened the door and held it open for me.

I smiled mischievously and brushed past him. “Why didn’t you call out to me? I would have waited for you.”

“I wanted to see if you would be honest with me. You failed.” He closed the door behind us.

I looked around to see what I could use as a desk. “Can I use that for my laptop?” I asked, pointing to the wooden side table against the wall.

He nodded and moved it for me in front of the couch.

“Thank you.” I took out my things and set shop on the wooden table.

Namjoon went over to his desk and organized himself. Once he was settled, he took out his burritos. He opened his mouth so wide, eyes looking as if they were going to pop out of their sockets, but would only consume a small amount of food. He looked so adorable taking such big, small bites from his food. I smiled privately at his cuteness.

We chatted for a bit before we started on some ideas he had for his workshop.

We worked for six hours straight, and it was I who spoke up about taking a break.

I noticed Namjoon was starting to rub his temple a little too much. It was a habit of his I now recognized to mean he needed food in his system.

He looked hesitant, but when I pulled out the menu options on my phone of where we could order from, he was fully intrigued.

After putting in our order, we continued to work. Once one of the BH staff brought our order up, we set aside our work. Namjoon moved to the floor next to me and we began to eat. Finally, we were able to fully chat about non-work-related topics.

“I finished the book last night,” Namjoon stated as he took a bite from his noodles.

I wasn’t sure which book he was referring to. He was going back and forth between two books I had recommended. “Alire Sáenz or Ngozi Adichie?”

“Alire Sáenz.”

“Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe?” I smiled as I asked the question.

His dimples instantly appeared as he chortled. “You enjoy saying that title.”

“It’s an awesome title. Why do you think I chose the book?”

He nodded, sweetly agreeing with me.

For the next ten minutes, we went over the novel and our thoughts on the characters and their different relationships with their parents. Namjoon related to Dante’s relationship with his parents: they were supportive, openly caring, and had great communication. I, on the other hand, found my relationship with my parents was similar to Ari’s with his own parents: distant and as if there was a heavily guarded secret that kept our relationship distant.

As I spoke, Namjoon placed his right hand on his chin with his fingers lingering across his mouth, as he looked at me intently with his warm, brown eyes. He always made me feel as if I had his undivided attention. Once I finished my explanation of why I familiarized myself with Ari, Namjoon's brows were lightly knitted together. “Have you brought this up to your parents? Feeling that there is something that keeps you from fully bonding?”

I brought up my legs to my chest, feeling a little too exposed and in need to get some physical security around me. “Getting Latinos to speak openly about their feelings is a very hard task. Often when I bring up an issue, they dismiss it. I know a little of my dad’s upbringing: an alcoholic father and a mother who worked much too hard to feed that habit instead of feeding the hunger of her six children. My mother grew up in an abusive household. Growing up, the only emotion they saw displayed by their parents was anger—which then bled into their own relationship. My brothers and I witnessed the toxicity. It’s generations of trauma.”

He was quiet for a moment as if analyzing it all. “You do well in speaking up.” There was a slight look of admiration in his eyes.

“There’s a difference between speaking up and opening up. Latinos have no problem being confrontational. We thrive off a good yelling match,” I said laughing. “But ask us about any childhood trauma? That’s when the beer and shots begin.”

“Why do you think you’re so different? You don’t hide from being open and honest.” A light smile lingered on his face.

“Therapy worked. And then my Tia Jia helped. She would ask me how I was doing—mostly focusing on my emotions. During the countless Korean lessons she gave me, I would also have small therapy sessions with her.” I smiled at the memory. I was grateful to my mother’s best friend—the woman who took on the role that the person who birthed me couldn’t. It upset me that I wasn’t close to my mother but having the relationship I did with my Tia Jia was one I adored and wouldn’t trade for anything. “Plus, I’m not really open to everyone. I might be openly caring and loving but talking about my emotions? I only do that with a few people.”

Namjoon’s dimples appeared. “I’m one of the lucky few?”

The question made me feel a little shy; he knew the answer. “I don’t even think I’ve told Hobi some of the things I’ve told you.” I could feel my cheeks getting warm. While I made friends easily and did well in social settings, I was very reserved. I had always kept my emotions and concerns to myself. But in the last two years, Namjoon had a way of getting me to open up with little to no effort.

There was silence in the room. I could feel brown eyes on me.

His deep voice rang in the small, quiet room. “I’m honored you feel you can open up to me.”

I let out an uncomfortable laugh. “Well, I might open up a little more to Hobi but he spends too much of his free time with his girlfriend. You’re equally as lonely as I am, so it’s easy to use you as my personal therapist.”

This made him break into laughter.

Suddenly the door rattled; the loud noise snapping our attention away from each other.

“Shit!” Namjoon jumped a little. These boys got scared too easily.

We both turned to the door and found a silhouette coming from the other side.

Namjoon let out a sigh that was reserved for his brothers. “He’s so needy.”

We watched as Jimin made movements against the door.

“You need to take a cue from Yoongi and install a keypad.” I began to clean up my stuff.

“I should,” Namjoon muttered.

Jimin continued his movements against the door.

“What do you want?” Namjoon called out to the door but didn’t make a motion to go to it.

Jimin heard this as an invitation and opened the door himself. He looked slightly flushed as if he had been working out for a good while. At seeing me, he gave me one of his flirtatious smiles. “Hi, noona.”

“Hi, cutie.” I grabbed my plate of leftovers. “Hungry?”

His eyes popped at the sight of food and he licked his lips. He let me feed him some noodles.

“How was the shoot?” asked Namjoon. He made his way to his chair.

Jimin nodded as he chewed and gave a thumbs up.

“What were you shooting?” I asked.

Still chewing, he answered, “A dance for the new Butter release.”

“Oh, the one with Megan Thee Stallion’s part?” I asked excitedly.

Jimin eyed me. “Did Namjoonie-hyung tell you or was it Hobi?”

“Hope,” I answered. “He sent me a couple videos of the practices. That footwork is complicated but you guys look tight.”

Jimin nodded. “It was difficult but fun. We shot it like 100 times yesterday.” He gave a small head shake. “What are you two up to?” He took another bite of food.

“Workshops.”

Jimin made a noise indicating he understood, but he didn’t hold too much interest in discussing it. After a moment of silence, I felt Jimin’s eyes were on me. I turned and noticed he was in fact looking at me with a smile on his face.

“What?” I asked. I had a sense his answer was going to annoy me.

He giggled and then turned to Namjoon, who had his back to us and writing something down. Jimin turned back to me, his smile only wider.

“What?” I demanded.

After a giggle, he cleared his throat and composed himself. “You look nice in that blouse.”

I frowned and looked down at my attire. Was I dressed inappropriately? The blouse fit me fine, I thought. It barely showed any cleavage.

Jimin continued to smile at his inside joke.

“Ignore him,” Namjoon advised, his back still to us.

Jimin then started one of his giggle fits.

I turned to Namjoon, completely lost.

Namjoon was dismissive. “He’s dumb. He took something I said out of context.”

“What?”

He let out a sigh. “I mentioned the other day how yellow looks good on you.”

This further confused me. “Ok?”

“He also went on to talk about that purple sweater you wear sometimes,” Jimin said, looking at Namjoon with a secret look.

Namjoon sent him a death stare.

“What sweater?” I asked.

“There’s this purple sweater you wore in the spring,” Namjoon said with reluctance. “I said the color complimented your skin tone. But Jimini likes to make something out of nothing.”

Jimin gave a breathy chortle.

Namjoon looked over at Jimin, looking more than done with him. “Are you in need for attention again? Did Hobi and Jungkook not give you enough of it?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Jimin said innocently.

Namjoon stood up and started to kick his little brother out. Jimin put up a small fight.

Before Jimin left, he turned to me. “Are you still going bowling tonight?”

I nodded. “Yups. I’ll meet you there.”

He said his goodbye and allowed Namjoon to push him out of the room.

“What is going on with him?” I asked, remembered how he had been the other night at dinner. As if he had some sort of secret.

“I’m telling you—he’s dumb,” Namjoon said dismissively. “Who else is going bowling?” he asked, wanting to change the subject.

“A few others. Want to come?” I asked. A mutual friend had invited Jimin, me, and a few others some days ago. I wasn’t sure if it was ok to invite Namjoon but it felt awkward not to at this moment.

“What time?” he asked as he sat back on his chair.

“7, I think. It’s a private party. A small group of us is going. We’ll have a private room.”

“Yeah, sounds fun.”

“Jimin has the address. Catch a ride with him.”

“Yeah, I’ll be sure to stick him in the trunk.”

I smiled and then checked the time. It was getting a little late and there were still a couple of things I wanted to do before bowling.

“I need to get going. I need to run errands.” I began to gather my stuff.

Namjoon nodded. “Ok. I’ll see you later. Want to meet up again to plan?”

“Sure. Text me what times you’re free. I’m meeting Yoongi tomorrow and Tae in a couple of days.” I stuck the last piece of item inside my bag.

Namjoon looked a bit taken aback. “Suga asked for help?”

I scoffed. “No. I’m inviting myself over and helping him plan it out. Otherwise, he’ll just make something up the morning of his workshop.”

He tilted his head. “That tends to work for him.”

“I know. But can you imagine how better his songs could be if he took his time with them, rather than working on them for an hour and just submitting them as is?” I was secretly jealous of how Yoongi was able to create masterpieces in such little time. He never stressed over a song; he just let a song be. I was the opposite. I overanalyzed every lyric and chord and beat.

Namjoon chuckled. “Don’t be too disappointed when all he does is ignore you.”

“Oh, I’m gonna make it happen.” I took my bag.

As I turned to the door, Namjoon was already there and opening it for me. I thanked him as I stepped outside. “See you in a bit.”

He gave a gentle wave. “Bye.”

I noticed he didn’t go back into the studio until I was turning the corner.

~~~~~

After getting groceries, I did a few chores around my apartment and decided to take a small nap. There was no way I was going to make it past midnight without one.

By the time I woke up, I noticed I didn’t have long to get ready. I cursed myself for not setting an alarm, but I had no idea my body had felt so exhausted.

I rushed to my closet and took out one of my favorite jeans along with the first shirt that would go well with it. My braid was a mess, so I decided to pull it apart. It was still damp from my shower in the morning, so I applied some product. It was naturally curly, and the braid had tightened the curls. Thankfully, I was out of my apartment at a decent time.

When I arrived at the location, a couple of friends were already there, including Jungkook.

Namjoon and Jimin arrived a few minutes later. I was sure their tardiness was due to Jimin. They had taken a car together; it was only natural that Namjoon would arrive late as well.

Jimin was sporting a pair of slacks and a cozy sweater while Namjoon wore overalls and a loose white t-shirt underneath. He had ditched his timberlands for combat boots. He pulled the outfit like a model.

Everyone exchanged greetings with the pair of them.

I caught Jimin staring at me and he give a small giggle. I ignored him.

Jungkook frowned at Namjoon. “I thought you were working in the studio tonight.”

Jungkook was standing behind me with his hands on my shoulders, I could feel his nose get close to my hair and take a whiff of it. This was not uncommon for him to do, so it didn’t bother me.

Namjoon shook his head. “I’ll do that after,” he said as he took a seat next to me.

After we settled on the teams, a staff came over to take out drink orders. I asked for a martini.

As the staff walked away, Namjoon turned to me with a serious face.

“Aren’t you driving, Maya?” His face was full of concern.

“It’s one drink. We’re going to be here for at least an hour. And if I don’t feel fine, then I can just walk around the corner to that one dumpling place and sober up before I leave,” I explained. I knew my limitations. I would never drive under the influence, which is why I wanted to have a drink right at the beginning of the game, so I had enough time to get it off my system.

Namjoon gave a nod. We all walked over to the bowling balls to select which we were going to use.

As I was looking for one that was the ideal weight for myself, I noticed Jimin looking at me.

“Nice blouse, noona. It compliments you very well,” he said.

I frowned and looked down. And that’s when I noticed it. I was wearing purple. Dammit. I internally groaned. Jimin was totally going to make this a thing.

Sure enough, Jimin’s laughter boomed.

I wanted to shove him. But I knew it would only draw attention and more people would get involved in the teasing.

Thankfully, only Jungkook was interested in Jimin’s laughter and Jimin didn’t tell him what it was he was laughing about.

I did my best to talk to my team and keep their focus away from Jimin.

As we strategized, the door to our private room opened. We looked up and a good-looking guy wearing all black made his way over to us.

“What’s up everyone?” Jackson greeted the room.

We all shouted out pleasantries.

I was one of the first he got to. “You made it,” I said as I gave him a hug.

He held on for several seconds before letting go. “Hey, chica,” my friend, Jackson Wang, said to me with one of his many smiles. He turned to Namjoon and they dapped up. “Where you been, man? I invited you to boy’s night the other day and you said you were fully booked.”

They had a sweet friendship. It was a strange combination. Jackson was a jokester and Namjoon tended to focus more on work rather than play. They were good for each of them. Jackson quieted down with Namjoon and Namjoon loosened up with Jackson.

Namjoon smiled at the teasing. “I finished a few things early. How you been, man?”

This was another part of Namjoon I enjoyed seeing. His way of speaking and physical stance changed around Jackson. Namjoon already had a cool demeanor but around certain people—like Jackson—that coolness turned to swag. His body was looser, his stance slouchier, his chin higher, his legs further apart. More relaxed and himself. It made him kind of hot if I was being honest.

The pair continued to chat as the game started.

When the waiter came with our drinks, he placed them on a table near us, keeping a social distance.

A couple of us went and retrieved the drinks, me being one of them. Many of the group also wanted water, so I made my way to get some—there was a jug not too far away.

As I made my way back with several cups and a jar of water, I overheard Namjoon and Jackson talking. But it wasn’t the simple fact that they were talking that caught my attention, but that my name was brought up. I stopped in my tracks.

Their backs were to me as they faced the bowling alley, so they weren’t aware I was so close.

��Of course, you came today. Maya's here, so why wouldn't you be,” Jackson said.

Jungkook laughed.

“Huh?” asked Namjoon, sounding lost.

Jackson laughed. “Is he still in denial?”

Jungkook gave a nod. “Yes.”

“Seriously man, you need to make a move,” Jackson said. “Maya is a catch. She’s kind, cool, talented, intelligent—she can keep up with you. Not to forget, she's hot. Guys keep lining up for her. And one of these days, she’s going to find a keeper and you’re going to hate yourself. If you don’t think you have a shot with her, then I’m going to step in—”

Ewww. I knew Jackson was joking. We had been friends long enough for me to know when he was joking. But it still didn’t make me want to gag any less at the thought of him liking me. It was like hearing an annoying little cousin liked me. “Jungkook, can you come help me?” I wanted to stop this conversation, quickly.

Namjoon, Jackson, and Jungkook turned to me and saw me ‘struggling’—I was pretending to lose balance with the cups and jar in my hands.

They got to their feet and hurried over to me. I handed Namjoon and Jungkook the cups and gave Jackson the jar. He even offered his arm to guide me to my seat.

I knew what he was playing and I remembered his gross words from a moment ago. I noticed he sent Namjoon a sly look as he extended his arm to me.

“Fuck off, Jackson,” I said in English as I swatted his arm and made my way to our seats.

He laughed.

“Namjoonah—you’re up,” called out one of our friends.

Namjoon put down the cups and headed to the front.

Jimin, Jungkook, and Jackson began to tease him. Normally, I was quick to quiet them down, but I kept playing Jackson’s words to Namjoon in my head.

You need to make a move.

What move was he talking about? Did he mean romantically?

In the years of me living in Seoul, some of our friends had made remarks about Namjoon and I getting involved, but it normally was in jest—or so it seemed to me. While Jackson had used his joking tone when he said he would ask me out, he certainly sounded serious with everything else.

As I observed Namjoon toss his bowling ball down the lane and miss all ten pins—twice—I replayed Jackson’s words, unsure how I felt about them.

For the next two hours, I did my best to forget the words. We managed to have a good time during the game. We all mostly sucked—except for Jungkook and Jackson—but we enjoyed the company…and drinks. Jackson ordered me another when he saw I had finished the martini. I caught Namjoon eyeing it. I knew it bothered him when I drank before driving. His neck was a little tense and was pretending to be engaged with whoever was up next.

I made sure to not have more than one sip from Jackson’s drink. I didn’t want to be rude to and not at least drink some of it.

The game was over a short while later. Most of us stayed to chat, but eventually, we all dispersed.

Namjoon, Jackson, Jimin, and I were the last ones to leave. Jungkook had left in his own car, hurrying home to his girlfriend and puppy.

The four of us who remained finally headed to the door.

Jackson had his arm around my shoulders. “Why don’t you guys come over? I’m meeting with Jinyoung and Bam. We’re gonna have some more drinks.”

“We have a few meetings tomorrow,” explained Jimin with a slight pout.

“Just one drink,” Jackson insisted.

Jimin turned to Namjoon, “Do you want to?”

Namjoon gave him an encouraging nod. “Go if you want. Enjoy yourself. I really need to get back to the studio. I’ll call another car.”

Jackson let out a grunt. He pulled me a little closer. “You’ll go, right Maya? I know if I can get you to come over, Mr. Workaholic will come also come.”

“He likes to work, leave him be,” I defended Namjoon.

Namjoon sent me a small smile of appreciation.

“And I really need to call it a night. I have a few things to work on as well,” I said before Jackson could try to persuade me.

We were about to exit our private location, so I stepped away from Jackson’s embrace. There would be people who would instantly recognize the guys and I had to make sure I kept my distance. “I’ll let you all leave first.”

I gave Jackson and Jimin a hug as Namjoon said he was going to call a car.

Jimin and Jackson looked at each other and shared a smile and look.

Namjoon shook his head to the side and took out his phone to make a call.

Jackson and Jimin waved to us as they left the room, big grins over their faces.

It would be another ten or fifteen minutes for a car to get to Namjoon. We were alone until then.

“I really don’t want to leave you,” Namjoon said suddenly.

I frowned at him. “That came out of nowhere.”

“Doesn’t seem as if you’ve fully sobered up,” he said as he looked at me intently.

“What makes you say that?” I asked. I didn’t even feel a buzz.

“Girl, your face is flushed,” he explained. “You talk a big talk, but you’re a lightweight.”

I rolled my eyes, knowing he was teasing. We both knew damn well I was good at holding down my liquor. “Get dumplings with me, then.” I reached for his overalls and pulled at them lightly. It was a slightly flirty move, but I did this to him at times.

He smiled back as he let his body be pulled towards mine. He usually shied away from my advances, but this time, he was giving in. “Let’s order delivery and get a cab to the dorms?”

He was so close he was almost hovering. I felt a sudden shiver. “I like driving myself.”

He shook his head, but a smile lingered touched his lips. “What’s up with that? I don’t get why you always have to be the one who drives.”

I looked up into his chocolate-warm eyes. How was it that I felt like telling him everything? “Dr. Rob says that it’s due to childhood trauma. Any time I can have control—I take it. As a kid, I didn’t feel secure with the adults around me—they were way too chaotic. When I’m not in control, my anxiety kicks in.”

Everything always pointed to childhood, didn’t it?

Namjoon didn’t say anything for a moment. He seemed to take in and try to understand what I had just said. With a soft expression, he said, “I’m sorry for not understanding before.”

As always, his apology was sincere.

“The dumpling place is close. Let’s walk there and pick some up?” I asked, looking down and kicking his combat boot lightly.

Namjoon let out a groan, but not because of my kick. “I’d like to, but…”

“People will see.” I finished for him.

He simply sighed.

Most of the time, it was amazing being best friends with Kim Namjoon. Not a moment with him felt dull or wasted. But there were times I was reminded that he was also RM, leader of the biggest K-Pop band in the world. If I were to be openly friends with him in the public eye, our privacy would only get smaller.

I really wanted this whole COVID shit to end. Then we could take a trip together to a place no one knew us and we could enjoy each other’s company. We had already thought of a few places we could travel to once things went back to normal. Now all that was left to do was wait.

“Just bring the dumplings over to the studio. I have makgeolli.” He was trying to bait me with one of my favorite drinks. Damn him.

“Didn’t you say you needed to work on a few things tonight? And you have meetings in the morning,” I reminded him.

“It’ll only be for a few hours. I just need five hours of sleep,” Namjoon explained.

I really didn’t want to be the cause of his little sleep. Plus, I had my own work to think about.

“Come on…” He reached over and poked my side. “Just one drink.”

I looked at him and he suddenly had a puppy look on his face with his pouty lips. He knew I couldn’t say no to him now. I smacked him lightly. “Damn you. Fine. One drink!”

He smiled in victory.

“I’ll go pick up the dumplings. Meet you at the studio in about 30 minutes.” I set off to the dumpling place and ordered for us as he waited for his car.

We met at RKive a little more than half an hour later.

He had changed out of his clothes again. He had on some Gucci sweatpants with a simple white t-shirt. He had taken off his combat boots and put on his comfy slippers.

There were small bowls, ladles, and makgeolli ready by the time I stepped into his studio. As I placed the food on the small table, I had a small doubt looking at the makgeolli.

Namjoon missed nothing. “What?”

“Huh?”

“You have that look on your face,” he said simply as he opened the bag of food and began to take out the dumplings.

“What look?” I didn’t like people analyzing my face.

He chuckled. “You’re not sure of something. You made a face.”

It was irritating sometimes that he knew me so well. Only sometimes. “I don’t think the makgeolli is going to go well with the dumplings.”

“I have sake,” he suggested.

I nodded. That would work. Makgeolli would have to wait for another day.

We drank one ochoko each. Neither of us was a heavy drinker, just did so occasionally. It was another thing we had in common. We liked liquor for the taste of it, not so much for the feeling it gave us. I personally had never been drunk; too afraid of being out of my own control. I had a feeling this was one of the main reasons Namjoon also didn’t get drunk often either. We liked to have a clear mind so we would make logical decisions.

We ate a little but mostly chatted for a good hour before Namjoon forced himself to work. I was feeling light-headed, so I stayed and watched him work. I gave a few suggestions when he asked for opinions, but I mostly lay on the couch as he labored on the computer.

I didn’t get to see this side of him often. When he worked, he was mostly alone in the studio. It was one of my favorite versions of him: the hard worker.

He had put on an oversized hoodie, his hood wrapped around his head. Headphones were covering one ear as he looked intently at his screen. His left fingers stroked the keyboard every once in a while as his right hand skimmed the mousepad. His shoulders were hunched over as he listened to the beat. He muttered to himself every so often. He was so consumed in his craft, that he forgot I was there. And I couldn’t help but like the feeling. I was watching a version of him many didn’t get to see.

He let out a heavy sigh and began to stretch his neck, rotating round and round. He did a turn on his chair and his eyes landed on mine. He looked a little surprised at the sight of me. Then he let out a nervous laugh. “I forgot you were here.”

“Thanks,” I said sarcastically.

He got up from his chair. “Sorry.” He started walking over to me. “You look better, though.”

I gave him a look. “Are you saying I looked like shit?”

“You never look like shit.” He took a seat on the floor and leaned against the couch.

I pulled myself upright and threw my legs on the ground. “You looked cute working,” I admitted to him as I slid down to sit next to him.

He frowned. “How?”

I shrugged. “You were fully engrossed; very focused. It’s nice to see how that genius brain of yours works while you’re creating something.”

He shook his head slightly. “I’m not that smart.”

“Your IQ says differently.”

“That was just a test. A piece of paper that doesn’t apply to real life—real art,” he said with all seriousness. “You and Yoongi create amazing music that I never could. You play multiple musical instruments, you can carry full conversations in three languages, and you have more education than I do—a bachelor’s degree. You’re smarter than I am.”

“There’s a difference between genius and smart. I know I’m smart. But that came with great difficulty. I’m not naturallysmart—I needed a lot of private tutors and lessons to get me there. I had the luxury of growing up with opportunities—my parents were wealthy. I had tutors to assist me. But you have the kind of brain that very few are born with.”

He opened his mouth to argue, but I shut him up it with my hand. “I don’t want to hear it.”

I was so close to him, I could see the black streaks in his deep, warm cocoa irises. He had such deep brown eyes, it was surprising to find they weren’t as dark as I thought they were.

It took a while to notice I had moved closer to him. So much so, that I could feel his breath on my face. I pulled back, feeling embarrassed.

He looked a little off as well as he looked at me. Had I made him feel uncomfortable? Dammit, this crush I had on him was lasting way too long this time around. It was getting a little too out of hand.

He kept staring at me, as if he wanted to say something but was holding back.

“What?” I asked instinctively.

Namjoon was about to say something, but his phone buzzed. He let out a grunt and read the message, making him give out another grunt. “Sorry, I told Rabbit I would send this to him by midnight.”

I remembered where I was and checked the time. It was well past midnight. “It’s ok. I should really get going.” I got up.

He did the same. “Let me at least call you a car. Please.”

His eyes were pleading so much and it was pretty late. Seoul was pretty safe, even this late at night, but I didn’t want to worry Namjoon. “Ok.”

Relief spread across his face. He made a quick phone call. My car would be in the parking lot in a few minutes.

“Are you busy this weekend?” he asked.

I shook my head. “Wanna visit another museum?”

Museums and nature were Namjoon’s church. It kept him sane and stable. He had his trouble with depression. He got lost too much in his thoughts that if not kept in check, those thoughts would turn dark. He had admitted to me if he went without going outside for a long time, those dark thoughts would start consuming him. So, at least once a month, I went with him on either a museum trip or a hiking trail.

“I was thinking more of a hike,” he answered.

“Sure. Will Yongrae and Hakun be there?” I asked, referring to two friends he shared his love for art and tended to go with him almost everywhere.

“I’m sure they will.” He got a message on his phone. “Your car is ready,” he told me.

I gathered my things and began to head to the door.

“Text me once you’re home,” he said as he followed me.

We smiled goodbye and just like earlier today, he watched me leave from his doorway.

As I made my way down to the parking lot floor, my heart sped, and my breathing became heavier. What the hell was happening? I had actually leaned in. Our faces had been just a few inches from each other. God, I needed to get it together.

I vaguely recalled the ride home and even less, how I got to my front door. My mind swam around my feelings for Namjoon.

My body started to feel the weight of the long day by the time I stepped into my room. I felt exhausted from bowling and mentally tired from the worry. I had a feeling that despite the million questions floating in my head, my body was going to pass out soon.

I threw myself on my bed and wrote Namjoon a quick message, keeping my promise.

Me: Made it home.  

Moni: Goodnight. Sweet dreams.

His response was quick but short as if he had been waiting for my message.

I fell asleep, smiling at the thought of him waiting for my answer.

Throughout the night, I held onto my phone like it was a blankey.

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

[chuckbass-love]

Johnny smut#4

Hello lovely anon. Thank you so much for this request, again, i’m sorry for the long wait but i didn’t want to write this when i didn’t have much motivation and then have it turn out any less than perfect. I hope it’s worth the wait for you and that you enjoy it.

Also a lil A/N for everyone: To everyone who has requested, i’m gonna get back on it and try and get at least 2 or 3 out per week if possible. I lost motivation for a hot minute but i’m back. I love you all so much. Also, part 7 to only love can hurt like this will be up sometime in the next week or so. I’m still working on it but i already can’t wait for you all to read.

Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.

Pairing: Johnny Storm x Fem!Reader

Prompt #4: “You’d better be quiet if you don’t want to get caught”

Warning: Smut, explicit content, sexual intercourse, hair pulling, choking, mouth covering and swearing. 18+

Word Count: 5,160

GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @mcustarks go check them out❤️

Best Friends Brother

As your eyes glance around the beautiful garden filled with white chairs either side of the aisle with flower arrangements all the way to the alter. You can’t help but feel utterly enchanted by the scene, it’s stunning. However, you’re in the wrong place right now, Sue specifically asked you to meet her out back to help her get ready but as soon as you turnaround to head there, you bump into Johnny of all people.

To put it simply, Johnny isn’t exactly your favourite person and you’re not his either. Well, that’s a lie. When around others you don’t get along, you don’t hate each other you just don’t really have much to say since he’s always so cocky and you’re his older sisters best friend. But behind closed doors, the sexual chemistry is off the charts and you’ve spent too many nights tangled up in his sheets to count on two hands.

No one knows about your late night rendezvous though, especially Sue. And she can never find out. It would hurt her. You’re her best friend and Johnny is her little brother. So it’s a secret and it will always remain one.

“Wow” his lips curl up into a genuine smile as his eyes take in your figure in the floor length  dark purple bridesmaid dress you have on “you look, great” he says as he tugs on his bottom lip with his teeth, clearly unable to stop those dirty thoughts running wild in his head.

“Just great?” you ask, brow raising slightly before you chuckle and move to walk past him but he grabs your arm just in time to stop you from going anywhere “not just great, but gorgeous. In fact if this wasn’t my sisters wedding then i’d say you were the best looking one here” he turns his head in your direction, his dreamy blue eyes meeting yours, both filled with lust and need. But you can’t do this here. Today is Sue and Reed’s day.

“Johnny” you whisper lazily, the feel of his skin on yours makes you shiver with desire for him to fill you up, kiss you and make you cum around his cock multiple times but that will have to wait. You really need to snap out of this. So you do, you blink and look back up at him before slowly pulling away from “Sue needs me now, i have to go” and just like that he’s behind you, watching as you walk away. Mostly just to watch the way your ass moves in that dress. You can’t say you blame him though, your ass does look good.

The second you step foot indoors you hear Sue moaning about anything and everything to who sounds like Alicia.

“Your saviour is here” you announce and Sue turns around, beaming at you and you can’t help but stare at her. She looks absolutely breathtaking and her dress is the most beautiful you’ve ever seen. She looks just like a princess.  Alicia then leaves to go and check on Ben, leaving you two to it.

“Sue, you look amazing” tears brim in your eyes, drowning out your vision, she spots it immediately, rushing to hand you a tissue “don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry. You’ll ruin your makeup”

You take it from her, dabbing underneath your eyes before taking the eyeliner from her to re do what couldn’t be saved in time “i can’t believe you’re finally getting your big day” you finish zipping up her dress before helping her out with her veil.

“Well i’ve waited long enough” she laughs as you finish up and you turn her round so she can look at herself in the mirror.

“Now, i just need to finish my make-up. Help a girl out?”

You don’t even bother to respond, instead you start helping, picking up her bag of products. Her foundation is done so it’s just her eye makeup and lipstick that’s left to do. You go with a nice subtle smokey eye with a little silver glitter on top. Then to finish it off you apply some nude lip gloss to her lips before leaving her to do her own mascara, you would hate to mess it up after all.

“Oh i forgot to check with you, is Johnny outside?”

Even the mention of his name has an obvious effect on your body and it’s something you’ve never been able to control but instead of letting it show, you put your poker face on, clearing your throat and mumbling a quick “yes” and thank god she doesn’t catch on or say anything. You must have hid it well.

“Right, ladies the guests are arriving now and Reed is helping them all to their seats so are you ready?” Johnny pokes his head into the room and Sue nods, letting out a deep breath.

He glances at you before Sue walks over to him to make their way to the other room in which she’s going to be leaving out of to walk down the aisle, leaving you standing there sighing.

Guess it’s time for you to take your own place too. You follow closely behind them and then you and Alicia wait for your queue to go, she goes first, then you. Flowers in hand, smiling around at all of the guests, every one of them dressed up in bright colours, wedding hats galore. And as you take your place next to Alicia at the side of the alter, you watch your best friend walk down the aisle with pride. She means the world to you and if there’s one person who’s the most deserving of happiness, it’s her.

Reed wipes away tears as she stands next to him and you feel your heart melting, more tears forming. Johnny watches you from across the way, wiping your own tears of joy before his focus shifts to the vows.

Sometimes he gets urges to ask you out on a date but as quickly as those urges form, they fade. There’s not a chance in hell of you saying yes to him and he knows it. He’s just a hookup and he’s no stranger to half platonic relationships. He’s never particularly been one for commitment anyway but something about you changes his mind. Since you’ve been Sue’s best friend for god knows how long now, he’s watched many guys come and go in and out of your life. He’s watched and even listened to the many times Sue has held you whilst you cried and to tell the truth, he’s never been able to fathom why anyone would ever want to hurt you. Why anyone would ever cheat or leave you. He always had the biggest crush on you and it’s never left. 

Hence why one day he made a move, giving you his best cheesy pick up line at a party Sue threw one weekend. But you ignored him, it was only 2 hours into the party and you weren’t drunk enough to be taking him seriously. However, multiple drinks and shots later, he tried his luck again, and he hit the jackpot. You took him up on his offer. Whilst Sue was in the other room trying to clean up after her guests, you were in Johnny’s room, stripping off in-between heated open mouthed kisses.

It’s pretty obvious where that lead and the next day, you were so mad at yourself for letting it get that far. You cursed alcohol and your stupid brain as you quickly re dressed, repulsed at yourself and your actions. That’s when Johnny shot up, trying his best to make you stay, shutting the door as you tried to open it and standing in the way. You made eye contact with the player and he kissed you. You can’t recall anything else other than feeling captivated by him. His lips moved in sync with yours like they were always made to touch and you couldn’t control the way your body yearned for more.

And the rest is history. Since then you’ve been late night texting and meeting up whenever you could to hook up. Johnny eventually got his own apartment too which only lead to more often than not, the pair of you fucking like rabbits.

It hasn’t just been hookups though, as much as you’d love to lie and pretend that it doesn’t mean a thing, it does. You like Johnny, of course you do. He’s actually the only guy that’s ever been able to make you cum. The only guy who isn’t completely selfish in bed. He makes it all about you, every dam time and you feel torn when it comes to him. A huge part of you knows the two of you feel something deeper and more than just sex. You feel something more intimate. It’s definitely not love but it could be, one day.

Before you know it, you’re ripped from your Johnny themed thoughts as everyone starts cheering and clapping. You join in, watching Reed kiss Sue passionately before the two of them walk back up the aisle. You, Alicia, Johnny and Ben all follow behind with the guests joining in.

The reception is just inside and as soon as you all enter, the music begins. The real old school music. You’re The One That I Want from Grease. The DJ really has a way of luring everyone onto the dance floor right away. Usually at weddings, everyone sits down drinking and chilling before the buffet food comes out but not this wedding.

Sue grabs your hand and the two of you re enact the classic Sandy and Danny scene, overly dramatic though of course and unbeknownst to you, Johnny is watching your every move, unable to stop himself grinning like a cheshire cat. It’s very clear you’re having the time of your life and all he wants is to be able to dance with you.

Once the song is over, you walk around the room to look for the table that you’re going to be sitting at until you hear “over here” and you know that voice anywhere. You turn around to find Johnny sat down, a large glass of wine next to his beer. He ordered for you? Why?

“You’re next to me, hope that’s okay” he stands up, helping you into your chair and tucking it in for you before taking his seat again and sliding the glass of wine to you.

“White wine is still your favourite, right?” nerves fill his voice as he keeps his eyes locked on you “yes, it is. You remembered. Thank you” you waste no time in taking a big gulp of it, you can practically feel yourself getting aroused just by sitting next to the man and to think you’re going to have to deal with it the whole day is torture.

You press your thighs together, trying your hardest to stop whatever is happening in its tracks.

“You not going to dance some more?” he asks, sitting back in his chair, one arm draped round the back of yours “maybe in a minute, i’m still recovering from the first one” you giggle nervously, scared of being seen with him. Sure, you were put with him by Sue herself but what if your farce comes apart now, after all, he is being nice to you and the resting bitch face is missing instead a happy expression has taken its place.

Maybe no one will notice since it’s Sue’s big day, that could be the excuse you use if anyone says anything but then again, why should you care to make excuses? If you enjoy his company that shouldn’t be an issue. Maybe Sue won’t care. She’s always wanted Johnny to settle down with someone nice and you’re nice, right? She’s also wanted you to find someone too. But her best friend and brother getting together probably isn’t what she had in mind.

The song Crazy In Love by Beyonce comes on and Sue practically summons you to the dance floor, so you down the rest of your wine before you rush over to join her. Skipping the regular moves, you and Sue both start dancing like it’s just the two of you. No move off limits as you both grind your hips in circles, shaking your asses and laughing your heads off. She is the only person in this world that can make you laugh like that and you feel incredibly lucky to have her and to be here for her big day.

As your moves get more risqué you catch Johnny adjusting his cock in his dress trousers before drinking more of his beer.

The tension is building within you and you’ve never had to fight temptation so much in the whole year that you two have been doing this. You’re usually very good at waiting and making him wait for it but right now, it’s too hard. The next song that comes on is Check On It by Beyonce, again.

The more of the song that you dance to, you notice the lyrics surprisingly match your situation and a wave of confidence drenches you like rain.

If you got it flaunt it, boy I know you want it While I turn around you watch me check up on it Oh you watchin me shake it, I see it in ya face Ya can't take it, it's blazin’, you watch me in amazement

You continue to show off your best assets, making sure you tease and wind him up more before you make any kind of move which is what you usually do. Any time the two of you fool around, you make him wait and earn it, but it’s one of many reasons why he loves hooking up with you, you’re not easy, you know your worth and you’re 100% worth the wait.

The song finishes leaving yourself and Sue breathless almost. Reed stalks closer, handing his bride a drink and you head over to the bar to get another for yourself before sitting back down again. The buffet will be available soon and you’re desperate for something to eat. Peckish isn’t the word.

“Hello again” Johnny beams and you sip some more wine, a rather big sip yet again before you respond “hello. Are you gonna sit here the whole night?” you question with genuine curiosity, he only really danced a little when the Grease song was on but that’s about it and you aren’t oblivious to the other women checking him out.

“No i intend to dance i just need to be drunk enough for it first”

“I see, maybe then one of those lovely ladies will get a chance to dance with you” you say, observing one in particular who has been staring non stop.

“Please, i’d rather dance with you”

Your heart skips a beat and dare you say it, your vagina develops one. He’s such a sweet talker.

“You looked good out there, y’know” he motions towards the dance floor as if you didn’t already clock on to what he meant and you can’t deny the way your cheeks start to heat up as you thank him shyly.

That’s when he leans closer to your ear, his arm round the back of your chair again as he rasps “and that ass of yours in this dress, baby you got me so hard” his breath fans your neck as he returns to his normal sitting position but he doesn’t miss the way your breath hitches at the dirty comment. He knows all too well the effect he has on you and you know the effect you have on him.

In the past all it’s taken for him is for you to bite your lip and stare him down for him to get hard before. You’re his weakness.

Before you can even go to respond to him though, he clears his throat, tapping away on his phone as he stands up “anyway, if you’ll excuse me, nature calls” he slips his phone back into his pocket, walking away towards the toilets which just so happens to be right behind the DJ.

Your phone buzzes and you check to see a message from him ‘You coming?’ the text reads.

And that alone is enough for you to choke on your own saliva. You quickly sip your drink before standing up yourself and making your way over to the mens toilets. Thank God no one saw you.

“Johnny” you whisper yell until one of the cubicle doors opens, the bigger one at the end. He winks at you as he appears in the doorway and you strut over to him, allowing him to pull you in and lock the door. Your body is flush against his as he starts to kiss your collarbone first. If Johnny is anything it’s a man who loves to savour the moment. He hates quickies and loves to take his time with you.

You’re obviously not the first woman to fall victim to his touch but you’re the only one right now and you’re glad that he’s had experience, it’s clearly made him all the more sensational  in the bedroom.

“Oh” you throw your head back on a quiet moan, hoping not to be too loud despite music blasting outside making it impossible for anyone to hear you.

“Every time you dance, you drive me crazy. Shaking that perfect ass of yours in this dress, making me want you so bad” his lips hover over your sweet spot, his breath fanning it just like it did before.

You wrap your arms loosely round his neck as your back arches and his lips attack your neck like a man possessed, everything about this moment should feel wrong and yet it feels so right. The thought crosses your mind that everyone is out there dancing and most likely eating now all while Johnny is playing with your dress, lifting it up to reveal the new panties that you brought for today. Purple lace to match your dress.

“Oh baby” he groans, tugging on his bottom lip at the sight as his fingers wonder down and slip inside. His cold palm cups your sex making you shiver in surprise before he makes you forget all about it by spinning you around so that you’re pressed against the wall. Caged in by his muscular body as he towers over you.

He presses a chaste kiss to the back of your neck and heat starts to rise to your cheeks, you can’t contain the flustered feeling that fills you. He’s always had a way of being so dominant and stealing all control from you in an instant, since you’re so used to the roles being reversed in your life, he was more than into changing that. And to tell the truth, it’s one of the many reasons that you keep coming back. He pushes you out of your comfort zone in more ways than one.

His fingers play with the flimsy material of your new panties, grazing over your clit multiple times until you’re poking your ass out into his hand. “Someones keen, huh?” his low, raspy and taunting chuckle fills your ear sending shivers up and down your spine and causing goosebumps to form all over your hungry body.

“Please, Johnny” you beg pathetically, once again pushing back against his hand in hopes that he’ll get a move on and touch your properly. Which of course he does. You know he can never resist your charm. All the more reason why he’s slipping your panties to the side now so that his fingers can circle your arousal covered hole, almost dipping into your honey pot but holding back.

“Beg for it” he growls, taking your right earlobe between his teeth and biting down lightly “beg like the good girl i know you are” he continues and you gasp before breathing out a quick plea “p-please touch me Johnny, i need it” as your hands find purchase on the wall.

The feel of his knee spreading your legs apart gets you all the more excited for what’s the come and that’s when he gives you all that you’ve been craving, slipping two thick digits inside of you, coating them in your juices as they hit that spongy spot. He’s never had much trouble when it comes to finding your weak spots, he knows your body inside and out at this point and there’s not a time where you don’t cum when you’re with him.

“That good baby? My fingers getting that little cunt ready for my cock”

Your eyes roll to the back of your head in reaction to the pure filth leaving his not so innocent mouth and just as you go to let out a near enough pornographic style moan, throwing your head back too, the restroom door opens making you stop yourself. Footsteps make their way to one of the cubicles that just so happens to be next to the one your in.

Johnny then takes it upon himself to pull his drenched fingers out of you, reaching his hand in front of your face and shoving them into your mouth for you to suck on, using his free hand to undo his belt and now you know that you’re done for. You know exactly what he’s about to do. His cock rests at your entrance, staying there for a second before he slides in. Your walls welcome him in the best way, wrapping around his cock as he splits you open, stretching you beautifully yet again just like he does every time. The all too familiar feeling consumes you.

“You’d better be quiet if you don’t want to get caught” he mutters in hushed tones, switching it up so that his hand is fully covering your mouth, suffocating you as he drags his cock along your warm velvety walls deliciously. Obviously you don’t want to get caught but right now the anticipation of what could happen is enough to make you clamp down around him, earning a hiss.

A noise that obviously catches the attention of whomever is next door to your cubicle since the unsuspecting gentleman speaks up “are you okay in there, man?” shit. It’s Ben. You feel a wave of shame wash over you as Johnny picks his pace up slowly “yeah, everything's fine” he chirps, as if he has all the time in the world to converse when he’s buried balls deep inside of you.

“If you say so” Ben responds before flushing, washing his hands and then leaving the room. Now it’s just the two of you again. Johnny takes full advantage of the alone time by pushing you right up against the wall, your cheek squished against the tiles, his calloused hands splaying across your ass cheeks now and spreading them apart. Only so he can take a good look at the way he disappears into your tight chanel with ease.

“Doing so well baby, taking this cock like a fucking pro” he grunts, wrapping his hand around your neck and pulling your head back with the help of his other hand grabbing a fistful of your hair at the scalp but keeping your whole body pressed into the wall.

Sinful moans escape your mouth and at this point you’re way past the point of caring or trying to be quiet. Unless someone walks in then you’re going to let go and revel in the feel of him. The way his body traps you in makes your clit pulsate, you love being manhandled and you always have but only by him.

Anyone that takes even so much as a look at Johnny, they think ‘player’ and they’d be right but they’d also think he’d never be the type of man to be as filthy as he is in reality. Not only has he got a foul mouth on him but he’s kinky not to mention skilful in more areas than one. Dick and tongue game on point as well as those magical digits of his and the way they dance across your sex both delicately and brutally all at the same time.

You’re certainly not complaining though. 

“Fuck, Johnny” your back arches even more so than it was before as you shakily cry out his name with the kind of want that only he can spur on “what is it baby?”

“Don’t stop, i’m so close” you whimper desperately.

His pace is now rendering on animalistic as he fucks you into the wall with such vigor, wanting nothing more than to feel you come undone all over his cock, something he’ll never grow tired of.

“Come on then baby, give it to me” he eggs you on, keeping one hand wrapped around your neck still, tightening as the seconds tick by whilst his other hand smacks down on your exposed ass cheek, making it wobble a little which earns him a satisfied hum.

The two of you go crazy with you pushing back to meet his thrusts and him spanking your ass, both of you hungry for that release.

All of a sudden though the blaring music coming from outside stops. Making you panic. Johnny on the other hand is so close to reaching his peak and he knows you are too, so he doesn’t bother to stop.

But you hear the faint laughs of the wedding guests before what sounds like the DJ addressing everyone. Fuck. This better not be the speeches. You had one planned and so did Johnny.

He continues to fuck into you, grunting, growling and panting in your ear, driving you closer and closer to that edge. You can feel the coil twisting and turning in your stomach, on the verge of snapping at any second and you don’t think you’ll be able to hold back the noises when it happens.

“Gonna make you cream all over this cock baby and best believe i’ll be filling this sweet cunt up with my cum”

You rest your hand over his around your neck as your whole body starts to shake. You clench around his cock some more and just as you can taste the orgasm, the addition of his fingers pressing down on your clit push you off the edge and your head drops back onto his shoulder. The music starts up again, allowing you to really enjoy this. Your mouth hangs open whilst you scrunch your eyes closed, seeing stars as you fall into a pit of ecstasy. You can feel your legs shaking and threatening to give way but luckily for you Johnny moves his hands to your waist, wrapping around you so he can hold you up whilst he comes close to reaching his own end.

“Fuckkkkk, squeezing me so good baby”

You do it again for good measure and sure enough, he twitches inside of you, his hot cum painting your walls just like he said and a fucked out spent smile forms on your face making him laugh when he sees.

He rides the two of you through your highs before his thrusts come to a halt and he slowly pulls out. He then grabs some tissues, dropping to his knees and pressing yet another chaste kiss to your clit this time before cleaning you up. He can see that you’re struggling to stand so the second he’s done he rises to his feet, pulling you flush against him and then proceeding to push you up against the wall.

The two of you stare deep into each others eyes for a couple seconds, both of your chests rising and falling as you try to normalise your breathing. That was certainly an adventurous, dangerous and thrilling experience, one that you won’t be rushing to partake in again anytime soon. But it was amazing to say the least. The way he’s looking at you right now makes you want to throw caution to the wind and kiss him. So you do. You crash your lips to his, wrapping your arms loosely around his neck and as expected, he kisses back. His grip tightens on your hips, pulling you even closer if that’s even possible.

“What was that for?” he asks as you come up for air and you shrug, not even sure of what it was yourself. But all you know is you like him and this isn’t just some fling to you, some form of messing around until the two of you get bored. There is a genuine connection there, one that you can’t wait to explore some more.

“I don’t even know” you giggle, pecking his lips again.

Silence falls upon the two of you before he finally blurts out “go out with me” as if he’s telling you rather than asking.

“What?” you furrow your brows in confusion.

“Go out with me, on a date”

“I thought Johnny Storm didn’t do dates” you quip back, raising your brows with a smirk to match “i don’t but i’d like to try if it’s with you” and that alone warms your heart. The same heart that’s been crushed and broken so many times before and it’s almost like he’s mending it. Not that you’re complaining.

You take no longer than a second to think before you’re agreeing and kissing him some more. That’s when the music stops and you both look at each other.

He quickly zips up his pants, doing his belt up again and shrugging his jacket back on before turning back to you. With you both now looking decent again, you get him to check your makeup, he wipes the stray bits of mascara that smudged before kissing your forehead.

He lets you leave first whilst he waits an appropriate 2 minutes before he heads out too. No one suspected a thing and now it’s time for the speeches.

This is definitely going to be a wedding to remember...

---------------------

Me and all my hoe personalities after writing this one: 

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[dreamescapeswriting]

Bisous au Palais Garnier ~ MYG [M]

WORD COUNT: 4.5K

PAIRING: Mafia Leader! Yoongi x Assassin!Reader 

GENRE: Mafia AU, smut, includes descriptions of violence, death, some french that probably isn’t 100% correct since I haven’t spoken or taken french in like nine years, oral (f receiving) 

A/N: I hope you enjoy this!!

I just don't think I have the time this week babe. Yoongi's words echoed in your head as you stared at yourself in the mirror, your makeup was done to perfection to match your hair in the style you knew Yoongi loved on you. If this was going to be the only way you were going to get his attention then so be it. Dressed up to the nines in a silk-black backless ball gown, black strappy heels and a bright red lip so you could stand out just to Yoongi. The red lip was something he had picked for you months ago, telling you he couldn't wait to ruin it and rub it all over your face. The thought alone was enough to send shivers up and down your spine and have your core tingling as you rubbed your lips together making sure the lipstick was applied properly. It had to be perfect so that Yoongi knew what he had been missing out on.

"Are you ready yet? Some of us have been-" Taehyung, your best friend and Yoongi's right-hand man stood in the doorway shocked as he saw you. He'd seen you dressed up so many times but nothing compared to this, this was something you'd picked out and done all by yourself instead of having Yoongi's stylists working on you. 

"Close your mouth Tae. You'll catch flies," You winked playfully as you got up from the dressing table and began to mentally prepare yourself for the evening. Tonight there was a charity auction at one of the most famous Opera houses in Paris, Yoongi had been invited because of his name in the Mafia business world and he of course took the chance to fly out right away. Having no idea that you would follow him with a plan to finally gain his attention after weeks of him being too busy to even acknowledge your presence in the same house as him. The two of you had been together for four years in secrecy from everyone but those who worked closely with him. It was mostly because of your past that he kept you hidden, a killer assassin that never missed a shot meant that you were the most wanted woman in Seoul and most other cities and countries where you'd preformed a hit. 

"Yoongi will kill you for following him to Paris," Taehyung reminded you as you both headed out of your hotel room and down the large hallways of the grand hotel you were staying at. Just down the road from Yoongi's hotel since you didn't want to be too far away from him.

"Relax, he won't kill me. He loves me too much," You giggled as you stepped into the elevator, hitting the ground floor parking garage and staring at Taehyung who still seemed so uneasy about all of this. It hadn't taken much convincing to bring him along to Paris with you, all you did was tell him that it was himself or Jungkook and he jumped at the chance.  Mostly because he knew that Jungkook wouldn't protect you as good as he would, that and he was Yoongi's right-hand man, it was better that it was him rather than anybody else. 

"What about me? He doesn't love me that much." He half-joked, you knew he was worried about Yoongi firing him or worse and it wouldn't be the first time that Yoongi had someone killed for going against his word but technically this wasn't against his word. Yoongi hadn't directly told you not to go to the party but he didn't exactly tell you to come, you just went on your own accord.

"I'll tell him not to, he listens to me." It was true, Yoongi took everything you said as gospel which was probably a bad thing in the wrong hands but with you, it was perfectly fine. The elevator ride was silent as Taehyung ran through his head what he was going to have to do to keep his job with Yoongi while you were planning on how you were going to gain Yoongi's attention. The attendance at the Palais Garnier was well above the thousands so it was going to be hard sticking out in a crowd but you had the perfect plan.

Yoongi stared over at Namjoon as they glanced around the grand staircase entrance, Namjoon was watching out for the real reason they were there. There had been sightings of Yoongi's number one enemy, Mark Lee, in Paris all week so he took advantage of the ball tonight to fly out, using it as an excuse for you. Telling you that the ball was strictly for show purposes and he had no intentions of having fun there. If you knew the real reason he'd flown to Paris he had no doubt in his mind that you'd chain him to the basement in his mansion until the sightings had finished. Mark had been the number one enemy of Yoongi's since starting in the Mafia business. Mark was on a warpath with Yoongi doing everything in his power to ruin what Yoongi had and for no good reason. It had just been the way things were, whenever Yoongi would do something important Mark would do whatever it took to take it down. Even going as far as to try and kill Yoongi which, didn't work out too well for Mark who was now in hiding from everyone close to Yoongi.

"So far, nothing out of the ordinary," Namjoon slowed down at the end of his sentence as he saw Taehyung ascending the stairs holding your hand as you casually spoke with one another. 

"What is it? Did he show up?" Yoongi laughed cockily as he followed Namjoon's gaze, the cocky smile being wiped from his face as soon as he laid his eyes on you. Your head was thrown back in laughter as you spoke with Taehyung, even Yoongi knew Taehyung wasn't that funny. 

"What is she doing here? I thought you-"

"I told her I was busy," He confirmed what Namjoon was going to say and the both of them stared as you and Taehyung headed into the grand hall where the evening was going to go ahead. Dancing, singing, drinking and auctioning for the charity of the night. 

"Keep an eye out for Lee. I'll be inside." Yoongi growled, his eyebrows knitting together as he straightened out his blazer and began heading in the direction of you and Taehyung. He was going to keep his distance for a while, figure out what you were doing here and with Taehyung nonetheless.

"Thank you all for coming tonight, I can't even begin explaining how much this would mean to the charity to see you all here tonight," A French woman began speaking into a microphone but Yoongi drowned her out, keeping his eyes strictly on you as you and Taehyung faced one another. Did you have any idea that he was watching you? That he was even there? He felt his blood began to boil as he watched you place your hand on Taehyung's arm and lead him over to the dance floor as if you were a happy couple. The two of you lost in your own world as you span around the dance floor together. 

Taehyung felt uneasy as he wrapped his arms around your waist, slowly dancing around on the floor to the slow waltz that was being played by a live orchestra. 

"At least look like you're having fun or my plan won't work," You pouted playfully as you stared up at Taehyung, locking eyes with him as he swept you around the floor. Ignoring everyone as you danced together, your dress flowing out perfectly as though it was made in a Disney movie. 

"What do you want me to do?" Taehyung questioned as he began spinning you under his arm, bringing you so close to him your faces were inches away from one another. 

"He's found us, make it look like we're flirting?" You suggested but Taehyung shook his head while laughing at you,

"Why not?" You seemed genuinely surprised that Taehyung wouldn't do that for you and Taehyung inched closer to you. 

"Because I value my life," He whispered before spinning you back out from his arms and going back to a normal waltz, glancing over at his boss that had his eyes glued onto you. Taehyung could feel how much trouble he was going to be in when Yoongi would eventually come down and speak to you but a waitress distracted him. 

"Drink?" A waitress called out, interrupting Yoongi's line of vision as he tore his eyes away from you to accept the drink from the woman beside him. Downing the whiskey before giving her the glass back and going back to you but he'd lost the pair of you in the crowds of people that had joined you on the dance floor. 

"Don't frown too much Min, your face will freeze." The whole room seemed to fade away to Yoongi as he turned to see Mark standing behind him. A blonde girl holding onto either of his arms as they giggled wildly, probably having no idea what Mark was saying to make them giggling the way they were. Yoongi had seen this before. The girls were like groupies but for Mafia men, they would latch on to the first powerful man they saw and work their way up to the bosses where they could stay. 

"Mark. What a pleasure," Yoongi's tone dripped with sarcasm as he stared down at the smaller man that excused himself from the ladies, giving them both some cash to go and bid on whatever they saw fit. 

"It's a surprise seeing you here. The last I heard you weren't going to leave Seoul, something or...Should I say someone, had all of your time and attention?" Yoongi's heart began to race at the thought of Mark knowing about you, you were the one thing anybody could use against Yoongi. His weakness. One of the reasons he still kept your relationship hidden after all these years was because he was too afraid of someone coming after you. 

"News is, you've gone soft," Mark added as they stood together at the balcony that overlooked the dance floor, Yoongi's eyes were scanning over everybody to find you to set his mind at ease but you were nowhere to be seen. 

"Soft? No, never soft." Yoongi mumbled as he continued to scan the crowd, heart racing as Mark continued to drag on about Yoongi not being the cold-blooded leader he used to be but Yoongi wasn't listening. He was too busy trying to find you and Taehyung together, scanning over every inch of the room he could but there wasn't even a sign of you anywhere. 

"Are you alone tonight Mark? Or are the groupies keeping you company?" He turned to look at Mark who was staring at him already, all he had to do was try and keep calm. If Mark had done anything to you he would have been bragging about it by now instead of beating around the bush the way that he was.  

"The news in Seoul is, you lost your money and business...Do they know that?" Yoongi stated it loud enough for the two blondes that had begun coming back to hear and they left as soon as they heard the statement, Mark began to bite down on his cheek feeling the anger begin to bubble up in his body. 

"What makes you think I won't make a move right here?" He questioned Yoongi who simply shook his head not believing for even a minute that Mark would try something at such a publicised event, stepping closer to the man so he would whisper in his ear but Mark let out a groan as something sharp hit him in the side. 

"Because you're too chicken to try anything," You whispered to Mark as he began to fall limp in your arms, Yoongi's eyes widened as you pulled out a small knife from Mark's side and slid it into a holster that was around your thigh. 

"Tae? Sort it?" You questioned as Mark began to let out small whines as he felt the blood seeping from his side, you'd hit him where you knew he'd die almost instantaneously but it seemed as though he was putting up a fight. 

"Is there a problem?" A French guard questioned as he noticed Mark's body limping forward in Taehyung's arms, mumbling as he began to lose consciousness. 

"Pardon! Notre ami est un peu ivre," You answered in French telling the guard that you were sorry your friend had a little too much to drink, you pulled it off by staring up at the guard innocently who nodded before leaving not noticing the blood pooling around Mark's side. 

"I'll meet Joon and we'll take him out the back," Taehyung groaned as he began carrying Mark towards Namjoon that was just outside the hall. As soon as you were alone Yoongi stared at you waiting for some kind of explanation but you let out an exaggerated sigh as you looked at yourself in the compact mirror, 

"I need to go and clean my cheek and hands," You whined seeing a small spot of blood on your cheek and hands as you strolled away from Yoongi who wasn't going to let you get off this easily and began following you. 

"What were you thinking?!" Yoongi cried out as you entered the small women's bathroom together, three female all turned to look at you and Yoongi with a confused expression before leaving the room hastily. Yoongi stepped closer to you as you stood at the marble countertops washing your hands of the blood as you glanced at yourself in the mirror. Doing your best not to let Yoongi get the better of you, he knew what he could do with a single stare at you and that was, have you weak the knees for him.  

"What are you doing here? I thought I told you I was busy," You rolled your eyes at him as you turned to give him your attention, 

"I took away what was making you busy. Now, will you give me attention," As soon as Yoongi heard you asking for attention he smirked at you, a giant grin taking over his face as he realised what had made you fly all the way out here for him

"Is my baby needy?" He chuckled darkly, stepping closer to you so you would step back, only you hit the countertop and realised you had nowhere else to go. 

"Can you blame me? You leave me alone for weeks and then run away to Paris without me," You pouted as Yoongi wrapped his arms around your waist, chuckling softly as he stared into your eyes. 

"I was here on business," He referred to Mark as business and you sighed shaking your head, 

"I took care of that business," You spoke as Yoongi carefully sat you on the edge of the marble counter and cupped your face in his hands, he knew he was supposed to be mad at you for putting yourself in danger the way you did but he couldn't stay mad at you when he knew how much he loved you. He'd been doing all of this for you, making sure Mark was out of the way once and for all so that you could finally come out in the open as a couple. 

"You could have been hurt." He was doing his best to seem more annoyed at you than he was when in reality he was impressed with how smoothly you had gotten rid of Mark and he shouldn't have expected less. 

"I'm an assassin, we take care of business quick and easy." The nonchalant attitude you were putting across only seemed to turn Yoongi on more until he couldn't resist it anymore. He ran his thumb over your lips and you smirked knowing that you had him in the palm of your hand, 

"You wore my colour," He whispered happily as he lent forward, your lips centimeters away from each other as you nodded your head. Eyes fluttering shut as you waited for him to kiss you, 

"I did." You whispered before he finally crashed his lips against yours, the fire spread throughout your body and you smirked against his lips. Wrapping your legs around his waist as you dragged him closer to you not wanting the kiss to end. 

"You look breathtaking tonight, did you wear this for me?" Yoongi whispered against your neck as his hands carefully ran over the silk fabric you were wearing, causing you to hiss out as he rose the fabric up to expose your bare core. A disapproving look took over his face as soon as he saw that you were bare underneath, 

"What?" You questioned as innocently as you could, 

"If I wore underwear it would ruin the effect of the silk," Another innocent look stared back at Yoongi when he knew far too well that your actions weren't as innocent as they seemed. 

"My dirty little girl," He hummed as he began kissing down your exposed neck, collarbone until he knelt down on the floor in front of the countertops, face to face with your core as he licked his lips slowly. 

"Look at you, already dripping and I haven't touched you yet," He cooed as he ran one finger between your folds, slicking his finger up with your juices. The smallest touch from him making you hiss out in pleasure,

"Has it been that long? Just so desperate for any kind of touch?" He cocked his eyebrow up as he placed a small kiss on your left thigh and another on your right. 

"Too long," You whispered in an annoyed tone only making Yoongi smirk more as he moved forward. Blowing cold air against your throbbing clit making you whine out at him, staring at him with pleading eyes as you waited for him to do something to you. 

Without warning Yoongi leant forward to lick a long stripe from your entrance to your clit, sucking on your clit as he attached himself to you. 

"Shit! Y-Yoongi!" You cried out, throwing your head back against the mirror as he began to moan against you, 

"Taste even better than I remember," He chuckled as he began to slide his tongue through your folds a few times before attaching himself to your clit once again. 

"Oh fuck," You cried out as you began to edge yourself to the edge of the counter to get closer to him not wanting him to leave your core alone. He smirked against your pussy, lifting one leg over his shoulder and pushing himself closer to you. The intensity began to build as he added a finger into you, humming out about how tight you were around his finger. Your head began to race with thoughts of someone walking in on you, it was a public bathroom, after all, anybody could walk into the room and catch you together like this but that only seemed to bring you closer to your edge. 

"Don't stop!" You moaned out, threading your fingers into his hair as you rolled your head back again bucking your hips to get closer to Yoongi.

"Cum for me princess," He said as he added a second finger into you, his tongue lapping up all your juices as you began breathing heavy and moaning out his name. Yoongi smirked against your core, proud that you were being this loud despite being in such an open area, 

"Cum on my tongue baby," He urged as he pulled you into him, gripping onto your ass as he sucked on your clit harshly. The sounds of your moans and wetness filled the air until you exploded. Throwing your head back against the glass so hard Yoongi was worried you would hurt yourself but he didn't stop eating you out once. Smirking as you mewled out his name, beads of sweat dripping down your head as you filled the room with desperate moans and whines. 

Yoongi stepped away from you as he stood up straight, wiping the corners of his mouth as he smirked at you. 

"W-Where are you going?" You panted as he walked towards the exit of the bathroom, 

"My hotel room, come on dove. You're coming too." He chuckled darkly as an excited expression took over your face. Your eyes lighting up as you got down from the counter and felt your juices run down your thighs.

"I'll let Taehyung and Joonie know I took you and not to come to my room tonight," He linked his hands with yours and began leading you out of the bathroom ignoring the dirty looks you were getting from women outside of the door. All of them had been waiting for you to finish so they could head inside, embarrassment began to take over your body as you realised they'd all heard what was happening in there but that didn't stop you feeling needy for Yoongi and his cock. You simply began to walk faster, pulling Yoongi in the direction of the exit as you could feel yourself getting wetter with each passing second.

As soon as you were in Yoongi's hotel room he ripped the silk fabric away from your body exposing yourself to him. He smirked as you didn't hide your body from him, only kissing him and attempting to get him out of his clothes as fast as he'd gotten you out of yours. 

"So hungry for me today," He praised as he began kissing down your neck, biting down on your skin as he pushed you back onto the mattress in the hotel room. You bounced a little as you stared up at him, watching as he slowly began to unbutton every button on the white shirt before exposing his body to you. Biting down on your lip you reached out to run your finger along his skin, smiling in awe as he let out a small hiss at the contact. It was nice to know that he had missed you almost as much as you had missed him. 

"Need you," You mewled out as you ran your hand down to your core, rubbing your clit as you stared at him. Your fingers never able to do come close to what he felt like on you but you knew how much he hated to see you touch yourself. He swatted your hand away. Replacing your fingers with his own as he took in a sharp intake of breath, 

"So wet for me again, such a good girl." You moved further back on the bed so he could kneel down on the mattress in front of you. He ran the tip of his cock over your folds and moaned out at how wet you were for him as he continued to coat his cock in your juices. 

"Ready?" He questioned as he looked down into your eyes, aligning his cock at your entrance pushing his hips forward as soon as you nodded. You cried out in pain mixed with ecstasy, it had been so long since you had him inside of you. Your hands reached out desperately to the sheets as you clutched them in your hands, moaning out his name as you closed your eyes tightly. 

"So fucking tight," He groaned as he slowly pulled out of you only to roughly push back into you the next second, the feeling of having his cock inside of you sent your mind racing. 

Once you were adjusted to him he began to move vigorously in and out of you, moaning out whenever your walls would grip him tightly as if he was made to be inside of you. 

"Missed you so much," You whimpered out as you brought him down into a kiss. His hips beginning to move in cyclical motions as he fucked into you. Each of his thrusts making you cry out louder than the other as they built up your orgasm. 

"I missed you too baby, tell me...How does it feel?" You whined out as you tried to form words but it was as if you were losing the ability to speak thanks to the pleasure he was giving to you. 

"G-Good," Was all you could manage to process as your mind clouded with desperation to cum around him once again. Your head was empty with nothing but the thought of cumming and him filling you up as he continued to fuck into you. 

"Cute, you lost all the ability to speak properly." He scoffed as he continued to ram into your cunt, getting rougher with each thrust making you scream out in pleasure. 

"I want you to cum all over my cock princess," He whispered in your ear as he pounded into you, grunting and groaning into your ear as he did so. His balls slapping against your ass as you let out loud cries of pleasure moaning out his name as he continued to fuck into you. 

"Cum." He barked in your ear and as if under voice control by him and him alone you came around him. Digging your nails into his back as Yoongi fucked you through your orgasm making it last longer as he used his thumb to rub your clit. Your hips began to buck uncontrollably as you came down from your high, letting out a loud cry as you felt him fill you up. Hot cum dripping out of you as he pulled out and sank down onto the bed beside you, you let out a protesting whine as he left you but he cuddled up beside you. Kissing your sweaty skin as he told you how much he loved you. 

"I promise that next time I'm busy, I won't leave you behind," You smiled tiredly as you let out a small hum of approval, closing your eyes as you grew more tired. 

"Rest," He whispered as he pulled the covers over you both, kissing your skin as he softly whispered to you, helping you drift off in the night. 

Groaning as you heard the door loudly being knocked on you sat up and pushed Yoongi out of the bed who in turn switched on the lights so you had to wake up with him. 

"It's 4 am," You moaned as you watched Yoongi pull on a dressing down and open the door, standing there was Taehyung and Namjoon still in their suits from earlier in the night. 

"Everything is taken care of. The rat is on its way home to Seoul where he'll be delivered to a funereal home." Yoongi nodded in approval of what Namjoon was saying before slamming the door in their faces to show he was annoyed at them for waking him up. 

"Hey, they did your work for you." You told him as he crawled back into the bed, grumbling about how he was tired and just wanted to sleep beside his girl for the night instead of being interrupted.

Tagline: @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @rjsmochii @fan-ati--c @taestannie @kneel-begyourpardon @sw33tnight​ @jin-from-the-block​ @acciocriativity​ @that-anxious-bisexual​

[doctorstethoscope]

The Right Chapter 3 || Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader

Hey gang, I wanted to give y’all another update this week because I know there wasn’t a lot of hotch in the last chapter. This is a long one! 

Read previous chapters here!

wordcount: 3.6k

warnings: canon-typical harassment and violence, swearing

tagging: @the-modernmary @greeneyedblondie44 @angelic-kisses13 @wanniiieeee

It’s closer to the afternoon than the morning when you finally get out of bed the next day. Aaron had set you up in his guest room before going to bed himself, and had dutifully woken you up every two hours. You emerged into the kitchen to see him sitting at the table with his laptop open, surely working even though he was technically out on sick leave. 

“Good morning” he says when he sees you appear in the doorway. “The coffee’s still hot, if you want some. I don’t have any RedBull, though.” 

You rolled your eyes as you crossed the kitchen to make yourself a cup. “Is it still morning? It feels like I must have slept through the whole day.”

“Well, you needed it. Long night.” He tells you, and you let out a little hum in response. “Hey, uh. Your cell phone is on the counter. It was making a lot of noise and I didn’t want it to wake you.” he admits sheepishly. “I didn’t read anything, but Josh’s name popped up a lot.”

You pouted a little. “I guess I did kind of just disappear. I probably owe him an explanation,” you said, crossing the kitchen and picking your phone up.

“You don’t owe him a god damned thing.” Hotch said a little harshly, but you knew his tone wasn’t aimed towards you. 

You powered your phone on-- Hotch must have turned it on after he took it. 13 missed calls and 27 texts, sheesh. Not all of them are from Josh, thankfully. You shoot a quick text back to JJ, Garcia and Emily, who had all individually checked in when you didn’t show up at the office. With a little more trepidation, you opened up your thread with Josh. 

“Where are you?”

“You never came to bed last night.”

“Off fucking the boss man?”

 “Did I catch you before you got down to anything good?”

“Fucking slut.”

“Couldn’t even finish cleaning the carpet before you left.”

“Fucking answer me.”

“Did I bash your skull so hard that you forgot to pack my lunch before you left?”

“This is ridiculous.’

“So you’re just running away?”

“Don’t be such a baby.” 

“You are so in for it when you get home.”

“I should have killed you.”

There’s more, but you’re not sure you can stomach it. You drop your phone to the counter, swallowing back a bit of bile that has risen up from your stomach. Aaron is at your side in an instant. 

“Can I look?” He asked quietly. He’s looking you right in the eye but you feel like you can’t see him at all, like he’s not really there. You must have nodded your head, because he picked up your phone and started scrolling, but you have no way of knowing how you even told your body to do that. After a moment, he sets your phone face down on the counter, and turns to face you, placing a gentle hand on each of your upper arms. “We are going to figure it out, okay? You’re not in this alone, and I’m not going to let you get hurt again. You did the right thing. You got out. And now you have help.” 

 He’s staring into your eyes as he promises to keep you safe, and the dam breaks. All of the emotions that you’ve bottled up for the last ten hours are flooding through you, and you’re sobbing uncontrollably before you have even recognized how upset you really are. Aaron gathers you up in his arms in an instant, and you wrap your arms around him, crying into his old sweatshirt. 

“It’s okay. I’ve got you. Let it all out,” he whispers in a mantra, rubbing your back.

You realize in this moment that Aaron is truly your best friend-- you’d always known that you were closer to him than anyone else in the office, and the same was true for him, with the possible exception of Dave. What you hadn’t realized, is that somewhere along the way, your college friendships, your academy friendships, your girlfriends, had all faded into the background, and Aaron became the person you wanted to tell good news to, the person you drew comfort from, and the person you called when you realized you couldn’t get the blood out of the carpet. The realization surprises you, enough to let you get a few deep breaths in and calm yourself down, untucking from Aaron’s shoulder and dabbing at your eyes with your shirt sleeve.

 “Thank you,” you say through your choked voice, even though it could never be enough.

“How’s your head?” He asked, looking over the top of your head to the clock on the stove to see if it was time for you to have more pain meds.  

“Ah, well, I don’t think the crying really helped.” You shrugged, attempting to bring some levity back to the situation as you picked your phone back up. 

“What are you doing?” Hotch asked, eyeing you and the phone. 

“I’m calling Josh back.” You said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

“Okay, now I’m sure you hit your head,” he said, swiping the phone out of your hand before you could place a call.

“Hotch--” 

 “Can you at least tell me why you want to do this?” He said, and you can see the concern etched into his face. 

“I’ve got to go back at some point. I’m sure it’ll be easier for him to cool off if I’m not completely ignoring him in the meantime.”

“Go back? What are you talking about?” Aaron asked

“I live there, Hotchner. I can’t avoid him forever. Even if I move--”

“You’ll stay here. For as long as necessary. It’s not safe for you to go back there.” He says, his tone leaving no room for argument.

“Do I get a say in this at all?” 

“Not if your only defense is that you don’t want someone else to take care of you. Because right now you need caring for, and I’m not letting you talk your way out of it.” Hotch said resolutely, and you sighed. The silence lingers for a moment before you speak up again, quietly. 

“I could use some more pain meds.” You admitted. 

“You shouldn’t take these on an empty stomach. Let’s get you some toast, drink your coffee to clear up your sinuses and then you can take your next dose and go back to bed.” 

“Hotch, the day’s half over. I can’t go back to bed.” You argued, with significantly less heat behind it, lifting the steaming mug of coffee up to your face at his suggestion. 

“It’s a sick day. You’re injured. You’re supposed to rest all day and let your body heal. You won’t be arguing with me once you’ve taken the pills.”

Hotch had tried to get you to take the rest of the week off, but you couldn’t stand the thought of sitting around in his apartment doing nothing. You also knew that an extended absence would catch the attention of your teammates-- and you weren’t sure if you were ready to share all of this with them yet. That was why you were perched in front of the mirror in Hotch’s guest room, liberally applying concealer and powder to your healing black eye. Aaron had made you promise to take it easy, and you already know he’d have eyes on you all day to make sure you weren’t overdoing it. No need to attract any more attention. There’s a soft knock from the hall. 

“Come in,” you called.

“Hey,” Hotch said, swinging open the door. “We’ve got to leave in a few minutes.” 

“I’ll be ready,” you assured him, dipping your brush into the powder before brushing it over your nose and cheekbone, wincing a little. 

“When did you learn to do that?” Hotch asked softly.

“Hotch…” You responded softly. 

“Sorry, I don’t mean to pry. You don’t need to answer that.” He apologized, averting his gaze to the floor.

“If I answer, are you going to stop blaming yourself for not noticing?”

“I can’t promise you that.” He shakes his head. 

“I wasn’t… I’m not a battered woman, Hotch.” 

“Of course you aren’t.” He’s quick to affirm you, to make sure you know he doesn’t see you as a victim.

“No, I mean, this was excessive. Was he rough? Sure. Did he leave marks? Yeah, he did. But I wasn’t getting tossed around and beaten like that. He’s not really like that, normally. He was just drunk, I think.” 

“You’re not seriously making excuses for him, are you?” Hotch asked, and suddenly you’re indignant, even though you know he’s right.

“He had a bad night.” You protest weakly. 

“He almost killed you!” Aaron raised his voice, just a tad.

“He was just trying to scare me.” You countered. 

“He was escalating. I know that you know that,” Hotch said, searching your face, looking for something to profile. You didn’t blame him, you knew your behavior was erratic. You draw a deep breath, your chin quivering as your eyes welled up. 

“It worked. I’m scared.” You squeaked out, trying not to let the tears fall and ruin the makeup you’ve worked so hard on. Hotch wrapped you in his arms again and you breathed in deeply, letting his cologne fill your lungs and lull you into a calm.

“You don’t need to be scared. I’ve got your six. I’ve got you.” He reminded you, and you pulled away from him. 

“I don’t think I’m ready to share this with the team yet.” You told him, and he nodded. 

“Like I said, your pace. When you’re ready, you’ll tell them, and if you want my support, I’ll be there. I’m gonna go make us some coffee, meet me in the kitchen when you’re ready.”

You were silly to think that you could hide anything from a group of profilers-- none of them have guessed it, yet, or if they have, they’re too polite to say anything about it, but they’ve certainly noticed something. They surrounded you with concern and peppered you with questions the second you walked into the office, and Hotch’s devotion to making sure you weren’t pushing yourself too hard certainly wasn’t going unnoticed. It was during one of your Unit-Chief-Mandated-Breaks that you snuck into the kitchen to refill your water bottle. Almost silently, JJ slipped in behind you. 

“You know, you can just say the word, and we’ll all stop pestering you.” She says, and you can hear her gentle smile.

“That’s okay. If I call you off, I lose the right to fuss over whoever’s next.” You tried to crack a joke. 

“Good point.” She chuckled. 

“I really am okay, Jayje.” You assured her. 

“No, honey, you aren’t.” She shook her head. “But you’ll tell us when you’re ready, and we’ll support you even if the secret dies with you.” She laughs, wrapping an arm around your shoulders as you walked out of the kitchen together, sharing a small conspiratorial laugh, your heads thrown back as you pass through the doorway. When the ping of the elevator doors opening grabs your attention, you drop your water bottle in shock. 

“You okay?” JJ asks, bending over to pick up your water bottle as he storms through the glass doors of the BAU. 

“You whore!” Josh spat out, catching the attention of the whole bullpen. So much for keeping them out of it.

“Who the hell do you think you’re talking to?” Morgan asked, rising from his desk immediately. 

“Josh?” Emily says, the first one to recognize him. Your eyes dart around the bullpen, and you spot Reid at his desk phone, no doubt calling security.  

“You fucking bitch!” Josh says, still advancing towards you. Your brain is screaming at you to run but you can’t get your legs to move. It’s a literal childhood nightmare, playing out in the flesh.

“Come on, let’s go back into the kitchen” JJ says softly, her tone betraying none of her fear as she practically shoves you back into the kitchen. You stumble into a chair, and the sound is muted because of the door, but you can still see and hear everything through the glass. Josh takes another step into the bullpen, but Morgan’s in front of him. 

“Turn around and walk out of here, man, because there’s no other way this ends well for you.” Morgan puffs out his chest, trying to stop Josh from looking over his shoulder and seeing you. 

“Not until that slut gives me some fucking answers,” He spits out, and you feel JJ squeeze your hand, but you’re too laser-focused on the scene in front of you to acknowledge her.

“I’m going to give you one more chance to walk away.” Morgan hisses through his teeth, advancing closer to Josh. 

“I’d listen to him if I were you.” Hotch said, suddenly appearing on the other side of Josh. You hadn’t seen him come down the stairs. 

“Ah, good old boss man.’ Josh jeered. “How’s my sloppy seconds? I hope she’s treating you real good seeing as how you stole her right out from under me in the night.”

Without warning, you watch Hotch’s fist connect with Josh’s face. Josh stumbles away, holding his nose, when security comes in through the elevators. 

“I’m leaving, I’m leaving.” He says, raising his hands in surrender. He turns around to face Hotch once more. “This isn’t over.” He says, bringing his hands back to his nose and following the security officer into the elevator.

There’s a stunned sort of silence that hangs over the unit for a few moments before you hear someone break out into a sob. When you feel JJ’s hand start rubbing across your back, you realize that it came from you. The door flies open and you startle, but when you look up, you see a clouded figure of Hotch through your tear-saturated eyes. 

You hear JJ and Aaron whisper to each other, but you can’t focus enough to hear what they’re saying. Whatever it is, the conversation ends with JJ slipping out of the kitchen just as quietly as she came, and Aaron sliding into the chair across from you.

“Can I touch you?” He asked, his voice only just loud enough for you to hear over the sound of your own labored breathing. You nodded, unable to verbally respond. He smoothed his hands over your shoulders, down your arms, taking your hands into his own. “You’re okay, he’s gone. Security knows who he is now, he won’t be allowed back in the building.” He tells you, and you nod again. 

“I’m okay.” You manage to choke out. 

“I need you to take some deep breaths for me, okay? You’re going to make yourself sick.” He asked of you, disarmingly calm, as he modeled the deep cleansing breaths for you. You take a deep, shaky breath in, trying to force the oxygen all the way down into your lungs before letting it back out in a huff. “Good,” he told you. “Good job, sweetheart, keep going.” he encouraged you, tucking a piece of hair that had gotten stuck to your tear-stained cheek behind your ear. When you were finally calm enough to look up at him, you did so. “There you are,” he smiled at you. “You’re okay.” 

“I’m okay. Your hand--”

“I’m okay--” He assured you, but you flipped his hand over in your own anyways. It’s swollen. 

“You need ice.” You said, standing up and crossing to the freezer. 

“You need to sit down before you fall.” Aaron stood up to follow you, shaking his head. 

“I took my deep breaths, Hotch. I’m not an eighty year old woman.” You chastised him as you pulled a few ice cubes out of the freezer, putting them in a plastic bag and wrapping a paper towel around it. 

“My hand is fine.” He argued with you as you pressed the ice pack to his knuckles. 

“You are in absolutely no position to argue with me about letting someone else take care of you, hypocrite.” You fought back, with nothing but concern behind it. 

“Okay, fine, but can you sit down, please.” He begged of you. 

“Don’t I owe the rest of the team an explanation for all of that?” 

“They can wait. Sit down.” He said, and it was no longer a request. You sat down in the seat across from him. “How’s your head?” 

‘It’s been better.” You tell him honestly. 

“Take a few more deep breaths, please.” He tells you, and you roll your eyes. 

“Hotch, I’m--”

“You’re holding your breath. Your shoulders are practically touching your ears. Plus, it would make my hand feel better.” He says, shooting you a grin that would be wholly inappropriate for the situation if it didn’t make you feel so at ease.

You roll your eyes at him in mock-contempt, taking the breaths to appease him and dropping your shoulders. “How is your hand, seriously?” 

“I’m fine. I’ve thrown my fair share of punches.” He smirked at you, still trying to distract you, to lighten the mood. “We can just leave. You must need more pain meds, if not a nap. We don’t have to get into all of it today.” 

“Well, they all basically know now. We should probably just go to clear the air that I’m not sleeping with you for a promotion.”

“If you’re not up to it, we can--”

“No, Hotch.” You stand up, shaking your head at him through a smile. “Let’s go get it over with.” 

 The team, of course, didn’t need you to explain that all of what Josh had said was false. Your integrity and the trust shared between all of you was louder than any stupid asshole that could bluster in through those glass doors. You’d cried all of your makeup off, so your black eye was now fully exposed to the team. Aaron left a protective hand on the small of your back the whole time you spoke, never once speaking over you or interrupting. As soon as you finished, you felt silly for ever thinking you needed to hide this from them-- they were supportive without being pitying, and JJ, Emily and Garcia had wrapped you up in hugs just as soon as you finally got it all off your chest. 

“We’re going to head out, obviously call us if there’s an urgent case notification.” Aaron explained to the team. “You all should feel free to leave as soon as your paperwork is done.”

“Hotch, I’m really fine,” you tried to insist. 

“Are you gonna tell the team they have to keep working?” Aaron quirked an eyebrow at you and you scowled, knowing there was no going back now. “I’m just going to pack some of my stuff up.” He told you, turning back to his office. You followed suit, going to your desk and tidying up. 

“Hey, cupcake.” Morgan whistled to get your attention before crossing the bullpen to get to you. “If I had known--if I had seen that bruise on your face before he walked in here -- I would have taken him down myself. Hotchner showed an... impressive amount of restraint.” He told you with a humorless chuckle. 

“Thank you, Derek. But he’s not worth it, seriously.” You told him with a smile. 

“No, he’s not.” He agreed. “But you are. Don’t you forget that, okay? If you need anything, I’m here.” 

Instead of responding verbally, you pushed yourself up onto your tiptoes to wrap your arms around his neck in a hug. He wrapped his arms around you snugly, crushing you into his chest. It hurt, a little, but the overwhelming security you found with him holding you was far stronger than any pain.

You pulled away and bid your goodnights to the team, following Aaron out to the car taking off towards his apartment. 

“You were really brave back there. I’m proud of you. As your friend, not your boss. Or, I guess as your friend and your boss.” He tells you, taking one hand off the steering wheel to squeeze yours briefly. 

“I didn’t really have much of a choice,” you rolled your eyes with a small smirk. 

“There’s always a choice. You chose to get out, and you chose to let your team in. That’s not nothing.” He told you as he parked the car in front of his place.

 “Thank you,” you said, choosing to accept the compliment even though you didn’t believe him. Aaron saw it in your eyes, but he let it slide. You’d see, eventually.  At her pace, he reminded himself. 

“I was thinking I’d cook tonight. Do you have anything particular in mind?” He asked as you settled into the apartment, hanging up your coats. 

“Aaron Hotchner, you can cook?” You laughed, turning around and beaming at him. He couldn’t help but return your smile. 

“I’m not Dave, but I manage.” He said coyly. 

“I’m sure whatever you make will be delicious.” You told him graciously. “And I’m very excited to try it.”

He tossed you an orange from the bowl of fruit on his counter, and then your pain meds. “Go take a nap.”

“Hotch, I’m---”

“Nope, I don’t want to hear it. I let you spend six hours squinting at screens and paperwork under fluorescents. None of that was good for your head. Go.” 

You rolled your eyes at him goodnaturedly before going to the guest room, stripping your work clothes off in favor of a pair of sweats and an FBI Academy t-shirt. Truth be told, everything that had gone down at work had been exhausting, and it wasn’t long before you fell asleep. 

[bestiepetedavidson]

Can I request hcs what Pete would do when you're standing in the middle of the night at his door, after a break up with your now ex boyfriend? Thankss ❣

yes! this game me inspo and i’m going to try to do a written-out story if that’s ok! :)

a/n: y’all this is the first story ish thing i’ve ever written so i apologize if it’s really bad/cringey! i feel like it’s extremely choppy but idrk how to fix it. constructive critism/suggestions/etc is ALWAYS appreciated! thank u! <3

song to listen to: i’m thinking adore you by bestie harry? idk it just fits hehe

tw: angst? i think? idk this is my first time writing this much lol. some strong language. ending with fluff :)

it was almost 3 am on a saturday night, pouring rain and thundering, and you were left crying on your now ex’s doorstep. you ran into your car, soaking wet. your boyfriend/girlfriend of 3 years, the person you were gonna marry- had just dumped you. they cheated on you with your best friend.

you had no one to talk to and nowhere to go. you’re pretty introverted, and the only people you really had were your ex-best friend, your ex, and your friend pete. and pete’s friends too, technically. they were mainly his friends but you would all hang out together, none of which you felt comfortable enough to go to.

you called pete- no answer. he probably still hasn’t left 30 Rock. but anyways, he had a lot on his plate. you continued to bawl as tears rolled down your cheeks and your mascara smudged underneath your eyes. you broke down and you couldn’t stop. he/she broke your heart into a million pieces in the matter of seconds. the past 3 years of your life had gone to waste.

you decided to just drive. you didn’t have anywhere to go because you were staying with him/her. you just drove around aimlessly for 20 minutes, still crying the whole time. then, you got a phone call. “pete”, your phone read. thank god. quickly, you pulled into a random grocery store’s parking lot. you picked the phone up and your bluetooth connected to your car.

“y/n” pete said. he sounded tired.

“yeah?” you responded, still crying.

“what happened? is everything okay?”

you tried to explain what had just happened, but you were too much of a crying mess for him to make out anything you were saying.

pete, confused, told you “y/n, i’m sorry, i can’t understand what you’re saying”. he took a deep breath, and continued. “do you want to come over? i just got home from work. we can talk it out”. his voice sounded worried

you agreed and hung up, and set your google maps to his apartment address. you started to blast a random spotify breakup playlist and drove.

~

a little later, at around 3:40, you finally made it. still soaking wet from the rain, you took the elevator up to his floor. you had somewhat calmed down, but you looked like you’ve been through a trainwreck. you knocked on pete’s door and he opened it to see you in your current state. the moment you saw him you just broke down, and he pulled you into a hug without saying anything.

so there you two were. just standing in the middle of the building’s hallway, hugging. in the middle of the night. he didn’t care that you were getting him and his clothes wet, and he didn’t care that he couldn’t go to sleep. he was simply focused on you and what was going on. he softly rubbed your back, and every time you would start shake uncontrollably again, he’d just hug you harder.

eventually, he suggested going back in. “y/n, let’s go inside and sit. you can tell me what’s going on and i’ll do my best to help.”

he held the door for you to go in, and you walked in and sat on his couch. he sat right next to you and there was a moment of silence before he decided to speak up. “hey.. y/n look at me. please.”

his words only made you cry more. he place his hand on your chin and slowly lifted it, giving you a slight “please tell me what’s going on” smile.

you took his hand off of your face and held on to his thumb. you were luckily able to get a hold of yourself and explained to him what had just happened, crying in between sentences. he didn’t take his eyes off of you for a second. he stayed there and listened to absolutely everything you had to stay, his thumb still in your hand. by the time you were done, any trace of makeup that was still on your eyes was a done deal, and it was all smeared on your cheeks. he took a deep breath and gave his opinions.

“wow.. y/ex/n is a fucking scumbag. no like seriously, what the actual fuck. who would do that? and especially to someone like you.. y/n you deserve so much better than that piece of shit. fuck him/her.”

you cried, and responded with “no, he/she’s right. i wasn’t worth it and y/bsf/n is so much better fit for him/her. she’s so much prettier and smarter and just better”

pete took a second. “y/n that is so fucking wrong. you can’t say that about yourself. you are beautiful and smart and amazing in every single way. anybody would be lucky as fuck to date you.”

you simply shrugged, he knew that he couldn’t technically change your mind and that you weren’t in a state to really believe that, so you just let it be. he took both of his hands and cupped your face.

“you are perfect.” he tried to wipe your cheeks with his thumbs but it only made things worse, spreading it all across your face. you looked across the room at that large mirror he had hanging on the wall and went “ah”, making fun of the way he made it look.

“hey, at least we have matching raccoon eyes now” pete said, smiling. to that you giggled, and he responded with “gahhh, there’s that smile i love”, as he hugged you again.

still sniffling but now with a smile on your face, you whispered “thank you” in his ear.

“anytime. and listen, you don’t get to talk about my best friend like that.” he responded

sending him another smile, you went to his bathroom to wash your face.

best friend, he said. nothing more.

while you still loved your ex boyfriend/girlfriend, you always secretly had a crush on pete. it was ever anything you would’ve acted on though. first of all, because of your friendship. you wouldn’t want to ruin the way things were. second, because you were dating someone. you loved them and you wouldn’t just cheat... but apparently they would. and did. third, you had just had your heart broken. you were in no state of mind to just go and admit your crush. but god, was it tempting. and it’s not like if you were to, you would want to start dating him. he most likely wouldn’t like you back, and even if he did, you wouldn’t want to date. you learned that you needed to take things slow, and pete knew that about himself too.

you walked back out, and you noticed that pete was in the kitchen, making tea. he knows that you love it. he saw you glaring and smiled, going “what? you love it.” you started to giggle because pete is absolutely not a tea person, but the gesture is just so cute. “shut up,” pete jokingly went, “we’re watching spongebob to help calm you and you’re sleeping here tonight”

“oh petey! how you’re just the sweetest!” you mocked him, smiling at each other.

you went to his closet to get a bunch of blankets, and soon enough, y’all were sitting & cuddling on his couch, watching spongebob on his couch, drinking tea, and cuddled up in a multitude of blankets. you were still worn out from sobbing and very tired, but. it was the perfect comfort spot. he always knew what to do. he was your comfort person.

he started smoking a blunt, (that’s pete for you) and he offered if you wanted a hit, but you declined. smirking, he decided to put it out. after an episode, it was already 4 am. you knew he was tired and so were you, so you suggested going to sleep, but pete insisted that y’all finish the episode. neither of you were really paying attention but it was kind of just playing in the background.

pete starts talking about random stuff going on, life stuff, making little jokes, the SNL show that he just did, etc etc. he’s sitting back on the couch and you’re on his side, head on his chest. you’ve cuddled platonically before so it’s nothing new. you’re both watching the screen and going in and out of conversation. at some point, you lift your head up off his chest, and you just stare at him while he’s continuing his story. he doesn’t really notice you getting up, and continues to talk about a recent standup he did.

watching his face, his jaw moving, talking, the way he speaks and the way his voice sounds, something changes in you and you feel the urgent need to kiss him. he notices that you’re looking at him. he turns his head and looks down at you. the second he notices that you’re staring at him, his words slowly fade out and he just looks into your eyes, forgetting what he as saying before. you’re still in his arms, but your head is up and you’re just staring at each other. there’s about 5 inches between your faces, and your heart starts racing. his does too.

“pete” you quietly whisper.

he softly presses his lips into yours and you kiss him back. his hand runs through your hair. his lips are perfect and it’s like you two were made for each other. the kiss lasts for like 10 seconds, and he slowly pulls away. you’re both at a loss for words, and you’re still staring into each other’s eyes. pete, breathless, quickly glances that the digital clock underneath his tv.

“wow,” pete says. “i’ve been waiting for as long as i can remember for this to happen and it happens at 4:20,” slowly creeping up a smile.

“i kno-” you start to respond, when you fully realize what he just said. you cackle out and can’t stop laughing, neither can he.

you pull him back into you as you’re both still giggling and you softly make out for a little longer. eventually you fall asleep in his arms, right on his couch. with spongebob still playing in the background :)

i hope u enjoyed my very first mess of a story <3 requests are open!

🤍🤍🤍

[someonedm]

It was an inconvenience, really. Jane didn't want to be here, and neither did I. She had all her friends to be with, chatting and quacking about things I had nothing to do with. And I had... my alone time, I guess. Sweet, quiet, alone time.

But things didn't go out as planned. Jane got suspended, for being a bitch, and when school said she couldn't go to the field trip, she called her rich parents who got it all sorted out. But room arrangements were already made, which landed her right here, with me.

I suppose we both made the best out of it. She spent her time with her girls, while I had a blast going through social media. But, when bedtime finally arrived, we couldn't avoid it. We have to stay together in the same room.

She steps out of the shower, her wet hair dripping drops of water onto the floor. She turns to me with annoyance. "What are you looking at?"

I hadn't noticed I was staring at her until her remark, and it caught me off by surprise. "Oh. I just-yeah." I got in the shower. "Good thing you are finally washing, don't know if I could sleep with you stinking out the room." She said it so incidentally, not caring about if it'd hurt me or not. The kind of effort someone puts in a "congrats" message in a group chat.

Coming out of the shower, I find her still standing there, looking at her own reflection in the mirror. Seeing me, she swiftly turned to her toothbrush, trying to hide the self-absorbance this entails.

Her eyes, reflecting from the mirror, look tired. Her skin is dotted with little imperfections. Her mouth, which I was so used to see lie on a self-assured smirk, was curved down. She wasn't wearing any makeup, and we could both see her.

Perhaps she was thinking of another insult, perhaps she didn't mind my blank stare, but I noticed her relentlessness as she offered me a moisturizing cream. "You want some?"

"no, thanks."

She went back to her bed silently. She was no longer wearing her popular girl persona. We were both tired and just wanted to sleep.

After finishing my prep up, I too went back to my bed. I stretched my arm into my bag, fishing out a flask. I waved the flask in front of jane. "You want some?"

"Where'd you got this?" She laughed, reaching out her hand to take the flask.

"Stole it from my mom's cabin."

She gave it to me back. "Won't she be pissed at you?"

I gulped some of the scotch. "No way. She must've noticed it was gone as soon as I left. If she cared for me I would have heard from her way too long ago."

"Aaah." She yelped. "Sorry for asking".

"First time?" I asked with a full grin, unable to hide my satisfaction with the situation.

"You think?"

"You goody two shoes got yourself detained recently, so I don't know what to think."

"Hell nah. The first time was eighth grade. My ex's brother organized a party and snuck in booze. They said they would have got me with them, cause I looked a lot older than I was. I think that that sentence was why I took that first glass." She sighed, and I knew she has something weighing on her, but she stopped herself from speaking. "What about you?"

"My mom thinks that my first time was when she gave me, after he- after he- uhhh... yeah. It was a bad night for her, and she couldn't give any shit. I had to act like it was all new to me, as if I hadn't had one of those after other nights. I am not a great actress, but I did have a drunk and tired audience." I looked up to her, and noticed she too had a hard time looking in my eyes. "Forget about me. What about your party? Your ex??" I raised my eyebrows repeatedly, and it got a chuckle out of her.

"I'd rather not talk about him." She smiled, though it was a sad smile. "But since we are discussing firsts... well, me and Tyler. Homecoming party."

"Tyler, huh? never thought he was your type!"

"What do you think my type is?" she asked, intrigued by my statement.

"I thought you liked your boys strong and sassy. The kind of jock smart enough so you won't have to actually tutor him during your 'study sessions'. Not some theater student exchange kid!"

I laughed, but she didn't seem to like it. "Do you really think of me like that? That I'm that basic?"

I looked her in the eyes. Even after knowing how she looked without her makeup, she seemed so tired. The kind of tired that stems from frustration, rather than lack of sleep. Jane cared a lot about how people think of her, even if those people were outcasts like me. "If you want me to be sincere" she nodded. "Yes."

Her soft smile faded. "I guess I should go to sleep, then."

"Wait, I am sorry. Why don't you tell me about Tyler?"

"Okay, but, I can't promise to be awake to finish."

"Consider me an elephant. I am all ears." I gestured with my hands curved, extending my ears.

"He is smart, and funny, and kind - I thought he was kind. He helped me learn for history, and we actually did study, unlike what you were guessing. He said how he missed his friends at home, and I thought it was really sweet. I felt safe with him, that he cared for me. I think he did - I wasn't just a popular girl to achieve. He made it clear, romantic gesture after romantic gesture, and when homecoming came I offered him myself. And it was all great going forward, up until Christmas break. He finally had a chance to go back home and insisted I'd stay home with my family. He ghosted me all that time, including a week after he got back. Then he confronted me. Apparently, he was having a long-distance relationship with whom I thought was his ex, and they had sex when he came back for his visit. Said he loved me but that she won't let him be with me.

So I got a little basic, and invited one of the jocks to have rebound sex in his car. While his girlfriend was over."

I chuckled. "I am sorry. What you went through is terrible. But god damn is that a good way to get back at someone, you magnificent bastard."

"I am glad I am amusing you." I couldn't decipher the look on her face, resting for a split second, before turning back to gossip. "So, who's your first?"

"I had a first- yeah uh I definitely had one."

A malicious smile sneaked onto her face. "No, you didn't."

I held the palm of my hand at the back of my head and looked down in shame. "No, I didn't."

A familiar sense of vanity came from her. "Doesn't matter. Who'd you kissed?"

I wanted to lie, but instead, I hid my face in the palms of my hands, hiding from her glare. "I uh - I hadn't kissed anyone yet."

"Well, that's such a shame! I bet many boys like you. You just don't notice them, that's all."

This comment, coming from her, caught me off by surprise. I had anticipated some sassy, if not outright a bit mean remark. "Really? You think that? Cause you kinda sound like my mom."

I guess I shook her a bit too, cause the sass was quick to come. "I'm sure of it. You know how boys are - they lust after anyone they think they have a chance with."

"Ahh, there it is. Should I take it as a compliment?" I smiled softly. "Cause I'm not hurt."

Her eyes widened for a moment. "No I- I didn't mean it, I didn't mean it like that - Ugh, nevermind." She rubbed her eyes. It was late. "If you want me to, I can help you get any boy you'd like. Who you've got your eyes on?"

I was starting to feel uncomfortable, but I couldn't tell what about this innocent question was so jarring. "I don't know. I never thought about it."

She leaned forward on her bed. "Tell me your type, then, since we already talked about mine."

"You must guess first."

She looked me deep in the eyes, assesing how I looked. She then turned her head to the flask. I imagine she was going through what I've told her, trying to make a sense of me.

"You like shy artsy boys that keep to themselves. You get tired of the enthusiazm of other people, even if it's about things you like, so it's nice having someone who's more quiet, like you. But you also want him to be more emotional than you, cause if it was left up to you, you'd be scared of the relationship falling apart. Did I get it right?"

Her description felt off. It wasn't insulting or arrogant, and I couldn't tell what exactly was incorrect, but it felt wrong.

"I... I don't know." I knew what I wanted to say, and it made me anxious. I could feel the saliva getting stuck in my throat. "I like someone who's sarcastic and witty, and doesn't open up, so when they finally talk earnestly it feels like winning a prize. Someone who cares so much about how other people see them, that they take off their hand crafted mask just for you, and seeing them that way, they are only ever more beautiful."

My gaze drifted away from her as I spoke, and I couldn't bare to see how she had reacted.

"I am tired." Her voice finally broke the silence.

"Me too. I don't want to stop talking to you."

"Me too."

The vision of that flask felt burned in my memory as I thought about reaching out and taking another sip. I couldn't sleep, and perhaps more alcohol in my blood stream meant stopping to think. I couldn't stopped thinking, and it paralized me. Images ran in my mind, thoughts and ideas being intrusive, and I had no help in silencing them.

The steady rhythm of her breath calmed me down, but as I focused on it the intrusive thoughts only grew.

"Hey." Her voice was quite, almost a whisper.

"Can't sleep?" I answered, with the same crooked tone.

"No."

Her breath is still slow and calm, but I can feel my own heart pounding faster. I wonder if she can hear it beat from beyond my skin.

"When you talked about the type of person you like.

You weren't talking about a boy, right?"

I turned my head to face the wall, watching the creaks, trying to make them absorb my thoughts and visions. I knew she would hate me for it, and the thought of being honest made breathing almost impossible.

"No."

I listened the rumble of her bed sheets, and her light steps on the floor, and my squeaking bed as she set on its other edge. Tears filled my eyes and I swallowed the saliva down my throat.

"Was it about me?"

I rose up on my end of the bed, looking at her being the most difficult thing I have ever done. I couldn't see her clearly through my tears, but I knew she was absolutely beautiful.

"Yes."

She reached out her soft hands around the back of my head, leaning closer and kissing me.

I was surprised and uncomfortable but I loved every moment her tender lips touched mine.

I parted away, breathing heavily as I only now felt relieved. I sounded like a wailing baby, and I must have looked like one when I wiped off my tears that continued to come.

She sat there, holding herself. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't want to make you uncomfortable... I didn't..."

I braced her as hard as I could. We kissed again, now calm between each other's arms, trading our air between our body and stopping only when we had to. We cherished each other's beauty, finding comfort in each other's eyes.

She laid her head on my lap, and I caressed her hair. "I don't want to leave you."

"Me neither." I leaned in and kissed her forehead. "I want to hold you until dawn. But the bed is too small."

She woke up and went to bed, and it dawned on me how tired I am. As we both lay in our separate cushions, she lends her hand towards mine, and I hold hers.

[kiribaku-queen]

Could we please have an insecure!reader x Bokuto! (Also Todoroki x reader but separately if that’s okay?) where she starts to slowly starts to compare herself to all the fangirls and the girls that confess to them? So she slowly starts to distance herself, then meets up with then to break up. But when she says she wants to break up the boys are like “do you not love me anymore, what happened” then she basically goes on a spiel about how much better he would be with one the fangirls and just straight up says she looks like the trash but of course she still loves him. So then the boys reassure her that she’s the only one he wants and that she is perfect and blah blah blah and it’s just a nice happy ending basically :)

It’s Always Been You

Pairing: Bokuto x reader

Angst, Fluff

Word count: 3.1K

A/N: I’M BACK! I’m starting to get back into the groove of things while juggling my work but hopefully, I’ll be able to start that new series soon! Let me tell yall, when I finished plotting out and detailing everything I want to happen in this series, it was 11 pages long.... like what?

Anyway, I love love loved this prompt. It actually made me feel sad inside. I hope it wasn’t too rushed. Also, I just wanted to do Bokuto since I have a lot on my plate, writing wise so i hope that is okay! Thank you to whoever sent this in and I hope you are satisfied with this! Happy reading! (if you want to know more about my next series, DM me! I really want to talk about it LOL)

“Kotarou-kun!” you bellowed your boyfriend’s name from the stands. You would always go to Bokuto’s volleyball practice whenever you could. You had your own club activities so you couldn’t always be there to cheer him on. But when you would, Bokuto would be jumping with joy, trying new moves just to impress you. You were already impressed with the achievements he made this past year, one being the top 5 spikers in all of Japan. But he somehow still thinks that there’s more wow factor in him for you. When Bokuto hears his name fall from your lips, he automatically whips his head and gives you the widest smile.

“(y/n)!” he sings your name, waving both hands in the air. Bokuto was so distracted by you that he didn’t see that ball coming straight for him. Luckily, it missed him but just a hair. But now his team was upset that they just lost a point thanks to him. Thank god this was just practice and not an actual game. You’d never live that one down. You could see Bokuto rubbing the back of his head, embarrassed, as his team continued to scold him to pay attention.

Spike after spike after spike after spike, you were amazing at how many times Bokuto could spike the ball down without getting tired. If that was you, you would surely break both your ankles. You leaned on the railing, admiring how hardworking and how much effort he put in his sport. You’ve never met anyone more dedicated than the man who was dominating the court by just standing there.

“This one’s for…” Bokuto starts as he jumps in the air with exceptional form. You smile fondly because you know what’s about to happen. “(Y/N)!!!” he dedicates his spike to you, yelling with his whole chest and smacks the ball on the other side of the court. With the widest smile and a big thumbs up, Bokuto faces you after his great feat. His teammates clearly embarrassed with his antics. It’s practice, for crying out loud. But Bokuto didn’t care what anyone else thought. He was going to shower you with love and affection to show everyone just who captured his heart.

You giggle to yourself. You loved this side of Bokuto. In the beginning of your relationship, you admit that it was embarrassing. He was just so extra with his affection that you didn’t know how to take it. But day by day, you learned to accept and love all the things he does for you. His smile, his laugh, his iconic ‘hey, hey, hey’ line, and even when he dedicates certain moves to you. But you weren’t the only one to admired him. No, his fangirls were also in love with that. Speaking of fangirls…

When practice was over, you made your way down the bleachers and over to your boyfriend, but when the team came into sight, Bokuto was already surrounded by a herd of fangirls.

“Bokuto-san, you were super cool today!”

“Can you show me how to play?”

“Are you thirsty? Here, I bought you some water!”

“Do you need a towel?”

“Can we feel your muscles?”

Bokuto looked uncomfortable, to say the least. You stayed behind the crowd of girls, giving him some space with his fans. He sees you immediately and gives you an apologetic look. You shake your head, insinuating that it was okay. Because it honestly was. You can’t be mad at him for having adoring fans. It was natural if he was going to play professionally. And this is nothing if he was to really play on a pro volleyball team. So you could take it. Bokuto continues to interact with the girls while to watch them, waiting until he’s ready to leave.

You could see him trying to make his way through the crowd to get to you, but surprisingly, his fans were pretty strong. They refused to let him leave, no matter how many times he said he had to go. But again, you were willing to be patient.

“Look, ladies. I’d love to stay and talk, but I have someone waiting on me,” Bokuto tried one more time and pointed in your direction. All their heads whipped around to you, not looking too happy. Their stares burned at you, scaring you a bit at how vicious they could look. With them distracted, Bokuto was able to slip out of their circle and by your side.

“Shall we go?” he looked down at you, love back in his eyes. You nod and Bokuto automatically wraps his hand around your shoulders, leading you out of the court.

As you pass by the group of girls who were still staring daggers at you, you heard their whispers. You weren’t sure if they were saying it on purpose or if it was because it was the truth, but they were speaking loud enough for you to overhear.

“What does he see in her?”

“Do you see her bare face? Does she not care that she looks homeless?”

“It’s because her face is bumpy, so if she wore makeup it would look cakey.”

“No, even if she did wear makeup, it would look so bad because she doesn’t know how to put it on.”

“God, she’s so boring!”

“Her hair isn’t even done.”

“It’s like she purposely trying be a loser.”

“And do you see how her rolls are spilling out of her shirt? Embarrassing!”

You tightened your grip on your skirt. Were they really talking about you? The entire time Bokuto was walking you home, you were looking down and thought about all those comments that they made. Mean as they were, maybe they were right? You didn’t wear any jewelry. It would only get in the way. You don’t do your hair, but you didn’t think it was that messy. You liked it the way it was. No, you don’t wear makeup. Not only do you not have time in the morning, but you only use it for special occasions. Fat? Maybe you were putting on a few pounds, but you and Bokuto like to eat. It’s his fault that you look bigger than normal. Is this what people think about you? Is this was people say behind your back? You looked down at your stomach and held it shyly. Thinking about those comments just made you upset. But did Bokuto think that way? You look up at him and he’s all happy like normal. He hasn’t said that you should change anything, but maybe that’s just him being polite. But that was going to change.

After dropping you off, you went straight to your room and dug up everything you could find: makeup, clothes, jewelry, accessories, curling iron, straightener. You put everything on your counter and got to work. You were going to look pretty for once.

First, you applied your makeup. Dramatic or subtle? What do most of the girls wear at school? After a quick search, subtle it is. You admit, you weren’t the best at makeup, but it’s not like you’ve never put it on before. You just needed a little practice and this was a good opportunity. After maybe 30 minutes of applying what you thought looked like good makeup skills, you moved onto the hair. You tried something that you normally never do. Up or down? Curly or straight? Extensions or nah? God, so many options. So again, you looked at what the other girls were doing. Looking back in the mirror, you smiled at yourself. Not too bad, if you do say so yourself! You were going to wake up early tomorrow and do exactly this. Bokuto was in for a big surprise.

A big surprise, he was. Bokuto waited outside your house like he did every day. You were running a little late but he didn’t mind waiting.

“Sorry I’m late. I was doing something real quick!” you announced and presented yourself in front of your boyfriend. As soon as Bokuto laid eyes on you, he felt his heart fly out of his chest and then back again because he had to be alive to see how stunning you looked. His mouth flew open but he couldn’t form any words. His eyes grew as wide as saucers and looked up and down. He didn’t want this picture of you out of his mind.

As shocked as Bokuto was, you didn’t take his reaction the right way. Did he not like it? Why wasn’t he saying anything? You know that your look might be different than normal, but he acts like you’re a totally different person. The longer that he stared at you, the more ridiculous you looked. But what were you going to do now? It was too late to change and you were going to be late to school.

“Let’s go!” you urged, hooking your arms together and pulled him along to walk with you. You acted like his reaction didn’t affect you, but inside you were disappointed.

As the day went on, you couldn’t help but feel subconscious about your new look. Your friends said that they loved the new you, but Bokuto’s opinion mattered the most to you. Because you knew that he would tell you the truth no matter what.

In between classes, you look either go to the bathroom or look at your phone, wherever there was a mirror so that you could look at yourself. Your make up started melting and fading away, your hair wasn’t as kept like this morning. Slowly, your new look made you look like a clown. And the more you looked, the more you started to see your flaws. Now you could understand what those girls were saying. Fuck.

Tears welled in your eyes that you rubbed away the tears. But in the process of doing that, you wiped off the makeup that you forgot you had on, the makeup that took you so long to do. It all smeared across your eyes and that made you cry even more. Now you were forced to take your makeup off. You turned on the tap and rubbed all the foundation, the eye shadow, the blush, and the lipstick away. There, your ugly bare face was back.

Since you were doing that, might as well fix your hair. Pulling your hair all the way back, you put it into a bun. You stared at yourself in the mirror again. Homeless. Ugly. Bare faced. Fat. You could see it all. The realization hit you like a ton of bricks and you began to cry uncontrollably. God, you felt so embarrassed with yourself.

Bokuto immediately saw the difference in appearance when he saw you at the end of the day. Your shoulders were slouched over, your head was hung low, not to mention that your new look disappeared.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Bokuto said softly. “What happened to your new look?”

“Oh,” you jolted up. His concerned gaze made you feel uncomfortable and even more insecure about your looks. “It was bothering me, so I took it off.” You lied. And it was a good lie because he believed it without a second thought.

“If it bothers you, maybe you shouldn’t wear it to school,” Bokuto suggested. Oh, so he’s basically saying that you shouldn’t dress like that because he’s embarrassed by you. Your confidence levels just reached a new low.

“Yeah, I probably won’t,” you say discouraged and quickly walk away from him. Bokuto didn’t know what to say. Why did you look so sad?

The next day, you transitioned back into your normal outfit. You felt more comfortable but your body and the way you looked to other people was always in the back of your mind. You became so distracted by the idea that you began to distance yourself from the volleyball player.

You went to his practices but didn’t make yourself known anymore. Little by little each day, you let the fangirls take over. So he’ll spend most of his time with them instead of you. It was probably better like that anyway. The more you looked at them from afar, the more you could see the difference between you guys. You were just an ordinary student with an ordinary life with ordinary looks. There really wasn’t anything special about you. There wasn’t anything about you that stood out. Compared to these girls that were flocking all around your boyfriend? Beautiful girls. Their looks were out of this world. You could never compare to them. So why was Bokuto with you when he could have anyone he wanted? He was popular, athletic, goofy, strong. Every girl’s dream guy. It doesn’t make sense that you, a plain girl, was his girlfriend. A match that probably wasn’t meant to be.

Bokuto noticed that you were being distant. Eventually, you stopped going to his practices. Every day, he would look for you in the stands but you were never there. Whenever he has free time and wanted to spend it with you, you were also too busy or had some place to be. He never saw you anymore. You didn’t even want to walk to and from school together. He couldn’t fathom what he did wrong. He thought he treated you well. He thought that he did his best to show you that you mean so much to him. So what was going on?

Bokuto stopped by your house one day after practice because does not like how you were avoiding him. He was going to figure out what was wrong whether you continue to avoid him or not.

“Oh, is (y/n) home?” Bokuto asked your mother who opened the door instead of you. Strange, were you not home yet?

“Oh, Kotarou. No, she isn’t home yet. Would you like to wait inside? She should be home any minute now,” your mother informed, opening the door a little wider to let him in. He gladly accepted and stepped into your welcoming home. Your mother let Bokuto make himself at home and that is just what he did. He went to your room and waited for you there.

When you arrived home, you greeted your mother with a kiss on her cheek and headed for your room when your mom stopped you in your tracks.

“Oh, your boyfriend is waiting for you upstairs, dear,” your mother said. You completely froze. Your heart started to race and cold sweat ran down your back. Shit. What was he doing here? After all this time, you thought you were doing well by keeping your distance but now he shows up out of nowhere, catching you off guard. Reluctantly, you opened the door to your bedroom and sure enough, Bokuto was standing there not looking too happy.

“Kotarou,” you say but didn’t have a clue what to say after. What could you say?

“(y/n),” Bokuto sighs and walks to you. But you backup, making Bokuto frustrated. “What is going on with you? First, you don’t come to my practices. Then, you stop talking to me. You don’t even want to walk with me to school anymore. Did I do something wrong? Because if I did, just tell me so I can fix it.”

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong,” you admit, but now Bokuto was confused.

“If I didn’t do anything, then why are you acting like towards me? Are you mad at me?”

“No.”

“Did I say something that hurt your feelings?”

“No.” Question after question, you kept saying no. Everything that he thought he did, you answered no. You weren’t giving him any information to help him understand what was going on. All you did was stand by the door, head down and you fiddled with your fingers. Bokuto was beyond frustrated. He put his hands on his waist and let out a deep sigh.

You couldn’t see him but you could definitely hear him and feel the ambiance in the room. He was upset at you. He had every right to. But now his reaction made you feel even worse about yourself that you just wanted to cuddle up in bed and literally just forget about everything. Maybe today was the today.

“If you’re so frustrated, why don’t you just break up with me?” you opened your mouth to say. Silence.

All of Bokuto’s anger and frustration dissipated and was replaced with hurt and betrayal. The moment those words left your mouth, his stomach dropped and the pain in his heart hit him so deep that he had to take a step back.

“Baby, why are you saying that?” his voice softens in the most pained toned you’ve ever heard. Guilt starts to eat at you for saying that, but cat’s out of the bag now. You don’t answer him and continue to stare down at your feet. He gets closer and you allow him to take your hands in his.

“I’m just trying to understand. Why are avoiding me? Why are you saying that we should break up?” he asks, trying to look you in the eyes. You shrug your shoulders but don’t say anything. But that’s okay because Bokuto was going to give you all the time in the world that you need to answer back. And it took you a long while before you should say anything.

“It’s because… I think you can find someone better,” you mumble in a whisper.

“Why do you think that?” Bokuto matches your tone. You shrug again.

“I don’t know. I see all those girls around you. And they’re all so pretty and thin. I’m nothing compared to them. And then I started thinking, and… you’re way out of my league. You could do so much better if you were with someone like-”

“Do you love me?” Bokuto cuts you off.

“Yeah,” you answer anyway. “But I don’t think we look good as a couple.”

“I don’t care what other people think. I love you and only you. I picked you. Every practice, every game, I’m looking for you. Whenever I see you, my day brightens up. When I see you, I feel like I can play my best. You are my strength and my motivation. You are the only one that sticks out in a crowd full of people. You’re perfect and don’t let those other people tell you otherwise.” Bokuto lifts your chin up so that you could tell that he meant every word. Your lower lip forms a pout and silent tears streaked your cheeks. His face softens at you. Gosh, even when you’re crying and snot is coming out of your nose, you’re still so cute to him.

“You really mean it?” you cry.

“Yes, you cry baby. Now come here,” he scoops you up and lays you on the bed to cuddle. “So don’t you ever say that to me again, or I’ll quit volleyball.” He threatens. Upon hearing that, you freak out and convince that he shouldn’t. He’s laughing out loud and kisses you all over.

“Ah, I love you too much,” he says content and you cuddle for the rest of the evening.

[okskz]

Mistake.

Mia + Stray Kids

during their kingdom performance, mia ends up making one mistake towards the end which causes her to be upset.

hope you guys enjoy! please feel free to leave some feedback because it is always appreciated!

[9th Member of Stray Kids]

Mia sat patiently in the chair, getting her makeup done. She was getting a few more touches done on her face, the makeup artist adding some shimmer on the side of her face and neck. As well as adding some sparkle in her hair. Mia felt like she was shining, and them wearing all white made the look even better.

“You look like a disco ball.”

Mia glared at Changbin through the mirror. “Be nice to me.”

“Eh, not fun.”

The girl shook her head, letting out a small snort before she got told that they were done with her makeup. She quickly jumped out of her seat, but had slipped back on the chair. “Woah. These shoes are kinda slippery.” She looked down at the white combat boots she had on and began sliding them on the floor. They were indeed slippery, but Mia paid no mind to it.

She looked at herself one more time in the mirror, her outfit looked great, and her hair had faded out from the pink she had so now she had some blond streaks at the bottom, which she had really liked. And it was pulled back on top, braided. Mia wasn’t a big fan of having her hair in her face because it got in the way of performing sometimes. So she was glad the hairstylist decided to pull it back for her.

“How do I look?” She twirled around when approaching the boys, seeing they were done getting ready.

“Ugly, hideous, I hate you, none of the above.” Minho joked. “Just kidding, you look great. Stunning even, the most beautiful girl in the world, so pretty, Mia.”

Mia rolled her eyes. “Thanks, you’re so kind.” She said, with a hand on her hip.

“Starting making your way to the stage.” Their manager had said to them, making everyone get up from their seats.

Mia began feeling a little jumpy, standing next to the stage. Out of all the performances she’s ever done, the Kingdom performances made her feel more pressure. Mainly because so much was added to them, from props, to having backup dancers, and making sure everything turns out good. Especially since this was basically a competition, not just performing for fun. Although she did hav me fun performing, Mia knew she had to be extra cautious on not making any mistakes. Which has always been not hard to do for her.

“Nervous?” Changbin questioned her.

“A little.” She whispered. “But also super stoked. This might be one of our best performances.”

What could go wrong?

Mia had lots of adrenaline going on throughout the performance, everything was going great. They were close to finishing and Mia was the one that was going to end it with the last verse. She knew she had to finish strong.

Everything was happening so fast when the backup dancers had lifted Mia up and she had to jump down.

But when she did, Mia ended up accidentally slipping. With her shoes and floor being a bit slippery, it wasn’t a good mix which ended up making her fall back.

Thankfully the two backup dancers that were behind Mia caught what had happened and were quick to pick her back up on her feet to pull off the mistake she did. Mia felt her heart racing now, but still manged finish off the song. Except her mind was now on the mistake she had made, and only hoped it wasn’t affecting how she was performing.

They were at their ending pose, and Mia could already feel the embarrassment go through her if someone had caught her mistake. She was also going to feel bad if this mistake was going to cause their rank to go down. She swallowed hard, feeling her anxiety kick in.

And once they got the okay to leave the stage, Mia was the first to get out. “Mia.” Chan called out. He had noticed her mistake and knew she wasn’t taking it so good. Mia only ignored him, looking straight as she could feel herself slowly breaking. Tears making her vision blurry.

“Noona, what’s wrong?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” She said, trembling.

“She made a mistake while performing.” Chan whispered to the group, low enough for Mia to not hear. “At the very end.”

“I didn’t even notice.” Jisung whispered back. He felt bad now for Mia. He knew how much Mia hated making mistakes in anything.

“Mia.” Changbin jogged up to the girl, softly grabbing her wrist to turn her around. The group finally catching up to her. “Hey, it’s okay-“

“No, it’s not.” She softly cried. “I should’ve been more careful.”

“Don’t beat yourself up over it, accidents happen.” Seungmin patted her back.

But as stubborn as Mia was, she wasn’t listening to them. The more she thought about her mistake, the more upset she was becoming. Mia took Changbin’s hand away from her wrist and darted away from the group, then quickly following right after.

“Mia!” Chan called out again, but the girl was quick to enter the restroom, causing all of the boys to halt. “She’s really upset.” He sighed.

“It wasn’t even that noticeable was it?” Jeongin questioned. “I didn’t even see it.”

“The two dancers behind her were quick to pick her back up to play it safe.” Chan informed. “But, we should all know her by now. She can be a perfectionist, and this was her very first mistake.”

“She’s going to be in there for awhile then, there’s no trying to talk to her right now.” Jisung sighed. “She’ll only ignore us.”

“Um, excuse me?” A voice said beside the group. “Can I please pass through to use the restroom.”

The group turned to face the direction of where the voice came from. “Oh! Elena!” Jisung exclaimed.

“Hi guys.” She bowed. “Everything okay?” Elena had questioned when seeing the groups’ facial expressions. All looking a bit upset.

“It’s Mia.” Jisung replied. “She doesn’t want to come out of the restroom because she’s upset of her one mistake she did while performing.”

“Oh, I see.”

That was when Chan had came up with an idea now that Elena had showed up. “You’ve met Mia before already, you think you could go in there and talk to her?” Chan suggested. “She probably won’t listen to us when talking to her, but she might listen to you.”

“Please, Elena.” Jisung said after.

“I’ll try my best.” The girl smiled at the group, heading towards the restroom.

Mia was sat against the wall, hugging her legs as tears continued to flow down her face. She felt like she was overreacting, it was only one mistake, not the end of the world. But the more she thought about it, the more she kept feeling worse about it.

When Elena had opened up the door, Mia didn’t dare to look up until she heard her name being called. “Mia?”

“Yes?” She sniffled, when looking up. She felt a relief when seeing it was Elena. They may have only met once but it felt nice seeing her again.

“You okay? Your members told me what happened.” The girl took a seat next to Mia.

“Not really.” Mia wiped her tears away. “It’s just, I feel a bit embarrassed and honestly not good about myself. I should have been more careful when jumping down.”

“If I’ll be honest, I didn’t even notice anything, when did it even happen?”

“Towards the end, when I had to jump down.” Mia answered. “I fell back on my bottom, but I got picked up quick.”

“Ah, see if you would have never said that, I wouldn’t have known.” Elena slightly chuckled, making Mia smile just a bit.

Elena was quick to notice Mia’s small smile which caused her to do the same. She then slightly tapped Mia with her elbow. “Your members probably told you this, but don’t beat yourself up. Especially if the mistake was quickly recovered.”

“I know.” Mia sighed. “I guess it’s hit me a little hard because this is the very first mistake I’ve ever done while performing. I’m always careful.”

“And making mistakes is definitely okay. We’re not perfect, Mia, and accidents do happen, and don’t forget yours was recovered quickly, just gotta make it work.” She reassured her. “Plus what idol hasn’t done mistakes while performing? Your members have, haven’t they?”

“Yeah.” Mia said in a low voice.

“And who knows, maybe you’ll back at this and just laugh about it.”

Mia took in Elena’s words and she was definitely right. Her words made Mia not feel too bad about the mistake happening. “Thanks for this. It definitely helped, Elena.” Mia said, standing on her feet. She put a hand out to help Elena up as well.

“Not a problem at all, glad I could help a little.”

“If you ever need anything, I got you as well.” Mia smiled. And who knows, maybe after Kingdom ends, Mia would end up having another great friend.

Elena had stayed back in the restroom while Mia walked out, feeling a lot better than before. She was met with all her members right outside, everyone staring at her. “I’m okay, now.” She said softly.

Chan broke into a grin and went in to crush Mia with a tight hug. Jeongin had came up from behind her. “That’s great to hear.” Chan patted her head.

———————————————————————————

elena belongs to @ateez-elena! please check out their blog :) hopefully we can continue collabing in the future!

[jerrienelock]

Colours- Perrie Edwards

Colourless, dreary, dull.

The words that describe the life of someone who hasn't found their soulmate. Having to see the world in a greyscale when those who have found theirs could bask in the beauty of the pulsating colourful scenery that the world ever so kindly left them to admire- nature showing off their bright vibrant greens, oceanic blues and violent reds.

Perrie was one of those people- soulmateless and only seeing the world through a black and white picture printed on an old newspaper. Her dream was, is and forever will be to see the world in those precious beautiful colours that everyone gloats about.

"That's red."- Leigh-Anne shakes her head at the blonde who had picked up a red crayon instead of a blue.

Perrie throws her head back in annoyance, stomping her foot slightly on the ground. Although the girl couldn't necessarily see colour, she had taken it up to try and at least denote what colour connotes to which grey she could see, with the help from both Leigh-Anne and Jade but it just wasn't working, she would ask Jesy but the brunette was never straightforward as to what she could see- one second it would be colour and she would drone on about the faint greens and the mystic blues of a butterfly that would flutter by, and the next she would complain about how miserable life is looking at the same blank canvas every day for the last twenty-nine years. Perrie had a feeling that the girl just didn't want anyone to know the truth about what she could see- that maybe her colours were different to Jade and Leigh-Anne's or that the thought of her maybe not having a soulmate simply drowning her in her own fantasy of what she dreams it will look like.

Although Perrie appreciated the fact that her friends were trying their best to teach her, it was just so infuriating how the blonde had trouble to grasp which was which- they all were so similar and she felt like giving up each time. It was just a small thing to help prepare her for when she is faced with the actual thing.

Leigh-Anne shuffles the small crayons back into their pack, sending the blonde a sympathetic look. -"We'll continue tomorrow, let's get to hair and makeup."

Leigh-Anne puts the pack to one side and the two head off to the makeup room, where Jade was just pushing herself out of the chair that laid neatly in front of a mirror. Perrie smiles at her bandmate watching as Jade flicks her hair back while throwing a wink at the two.

Perrie takes her seat in the lone chair- resting her back flat against the backside. The room looked so empty, now that it was just the three of them in the band. Since the departure of Jesy, she had felt like she lost a piece of her. Though they were all still good friends with Jesy, it was just still so unusual for the group to carry on as a trio, but just the thought of abandoning the mixers because of Jesy leaving left an unwanted sense of guilt and sadness bellowing at the pit of her belly. At least Jesy will be out there in the audience supporting their first tour as a three.

Adam, the makeup artist appears behind Perrie and flicks through his makeup kit- in search of the perfect shade of lipstick for the blonde, an earth red colour that brought out the natural pink of her cheeks. He proceeds to coat the girl's lips in it, before swiftly moving on to dash some foundation and concealer onto her cheeks and forehead.

All throughout the process, the blonde just stared at herself in the mirror, her eyes drifting over her various different shades of grey her features proudly sported. Her eyes were the lightest of them all, just barely winning against her hair. She hoped that whatever colour they were to be, it would be something nice- like the colour blue that Jade seems to fawn over whenever she talks to the blonde.

Adam pulls Perrie's head down slightly, -"Close your eyes really quickly."

Perrie does as told and she can just barely feel the touch of the bristles on the makeup brush travelling across her closed eyes in a swift formation. As soon as Adam takes the brush away, Perrie peaks her eyes open.

"What's the colour?"- She questions peering at the makeup artist beneath her barely open eyes. Adam continues to apply the eyeshadow, running the brush delicately over the top of the blondes eyelid.

"Pink" He smiles, -"With a hint of red."

"Can you describe it?"

He ponders for a moment, -"Well the pink is lighter than the red and it blends so smoothly with it. It makes your eyes pop."

"I can't wait to see it for myself."- Perrie smiles cheerfully, allowing the man to finish her off so he can move on to do Leigh-Anne before the first act finishes. -"Who knows. Maybe it'll happen during the concert."

Adam laughs turning to get the makeup he uses on Leigh-Anne out.

Soon the hair and makeup were done and the three girls were ushered to the platform where they'll be descended up onto the stage.

They get ready in their starting stance and the platform starts to lift allowing the muffled cheers and music to get louder and louder.

The first show of the tour so far was a blast for three, the ecstatic screams of the fans each fueling them with adrenaline and dopamine that would last for days on end.

But still, there was no sign of any colour for Perrie- sure she was beginning to doubt she'd ever see colour despite the arena being filled with thousands and thousands of people that could potentially be her soulmate, but she didn't let that push her mood down as she still had more than enough time to find them.

The trio had just finished their second to the last song, and Leigh-Anne was busy beginning to introduce the final song of the show.

"Now this is a song that feeds the message about you feeling good about yourself." Leigh-Anne smiles, her voice echoing through the loudspeakers. -"No matter the size you are, no matter how look..."

Perrie scans the rows of cheerful fans down in the pit, still listening intently to the words her bandmate was saying to introduce the song. Perrie continues to scan the rows of audiences of different heights, shapes and sizes and different tones of grey.

And then the starry dull colour of the world faded- replaced with bright vibrant rays of colour- that she couldn't recognise for her life- that burst through every gap in the audience in front of her. The lights above shone clear dancing over the arena. Perrie's heart thumped hard as the realisation of what was happening hits her.

"Oh my god."- She yells in excitement disrupting Leigh-Anne's cheery speech. Both Jade and Leigh-Anne turn to the blonde confused, -"Colour."- Perrie continues to yell turning to grab hold of Jade, shaking her, -"I can see colour!"

Tears brim in her eyes as she then proceeds to engulf the small brunette in a hug that lifts the girl off her feet. -"This is amazing!"- Perrie cheers dropping Jade onto the ground before shifting her attention to admire everything. -"But I guess the lessons we had been having weren't working out, none of these colours I can put a name to."- She frowns.

"We'll teach you."- Leigh-Anne reassures the girl, -"But right now, that's the least of your worries. You just found your freaking soulmate!"

"Oh no."- Perrie freezes her gaze darting back out into the direction where her colour first came to. -"I just found them, but I don't know who they are."

Panic starts to surround her and she tries to place who she looked at, but she just couldn't remember- the excitement about the whole ordeal had blurred out the placement of them.

Slowly the vibrant colours she had been able to see for the first time in her life, starts to dull and she sprints towards the edge of the stage in frantic. She had barely even had the time to bask in the beauty of the moment and it already was coming to an end. Worry and tears cloud her vision as she tries her hardest to find her soulmate.

"Perrie!"- An all too familiar voice shouts frantic off to the side of the stage. Instantly her head snaps to the side where Jesy is seen in the audience waving and pointing to you next to her. Your eyes wide not believing anything happening at that moment.

Perrie hurriedly runs over to you and Jesy, slipping off the stage carefully not to injure herself due to the height of it and into the gap where the security guards are. Perrie looks at you and gasps- the slowly greying world bursting out into colour for the second time that night.

"I found you!"- She pulls you into a hug over the metal barricade, she buries her head into the crook of your neck feeling your hands hesitantly snake around the top of her waist. -"I finally found you."

*** Masterlist; Celebrities

[maplecornia]

chapter 35

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 3.04K

𝔤𝔢𝔫𝔯𝔢: romance | slice of life | fluff | angst | bts x female!reader | ot7

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: cliffhangers | angst | fluff | slight mentions of self hatred | depression | mental health illness | self harm | occurs in the year 2024 | set in a timeline where BTS went to the military together | slight language

tags: @kookaine | @fangirl125reader | @kookiebbyxx | @taradevonne | @rae-bear | @mangminnie | @pixiekooo (not taggable) | @cana

"For your information, I am very against this."

"I thought you were looking forward to starting your training."

You glare at Namjoon when he makes the snide comment, and he has to struggle to keep his smile hidden at the reaction. Pouting in your chair, the stylist has to press her hand on your back to remind you to sit straight. At your reluctance, Namjoon's smile only grows and you struggle to ignore the rise of adoration in your chest.

Rolling your eyes you turn to your reflection in the mirror.

You're nearly unrecognizable.

With heavy lashes brushing against your cheek each time you blink, contour thinning your face, dark eyeliner helping your eyes pop out against the blush on your cheeks, you find it had to remember the way you looked before. Were your eyes always this bright? Did you always have this curl to your lashes? Were your cheeks this rosy, did you have that red hue to your lips? Did they always look so full and appealing?

Swallowing hard, you wonder if you're ready for this.

When Jin told you you'd be modeling today you thought he was joking. But BangPD wouldn't joke about something like this and when you got the call from him it only secured your fears. Biting your bottom lip, you fidget once more in your chair, the stylist sighing behind you.

Sheepishly, you go still, choosing instead to wrap your hands tightly around the arms of the chair. The stylist resumes their work silently, no doubt unaware of the insecurities rising in your chest. Namjoon is different, however, and noticing the way you've suddenly gone silent he glances towards you in worry.

"Is she ready?" Jin's voice breaks through the busybody chaos of the dressing room as he enters, the stylist performing the finishing touches to your hair.

Still holding forms of animosity towards him, you roll your eyes adeptly ignoring him. If he notices he doesn't show it, just angles past your retreating stylist and places his hands on the back of your chair trying to catch your eye. You raise your brow his way, refusing to return his smile. Noting the growing tension, Namjoon clears his throat, heading over to you as well and helping you out of the chair.

"I should hope so, doesn't she look ready?" He murmurs a bit nervously, and nudges you, clearly screaming at you to make nice with Jin and let bygones be bygones. You roll your eyes at the not-so-subtle signs and force a somewhat convincing smile towards the veteran. Jin nods in satisfaction before leading the three of you to the door, bowing respectfully to the rest of the staff.

Jin shivers in anticipation as he heads down the corridor. "Kind of nervewracking huh?"

Glaring him out of the corner of your eye, you scoff.

"Wasn't this your idea?"

Unfazed, Jin leans down peering into your eyes.

"Was it?"

Biting the inside of your cheek, you flick his forehead with your thumb and forefinger and he reels back, groaning in pain. You can't help but smile in satisfaction, but when you turn to Namjoon, his disapproving stare is enough to make the smile fade away.

"He started it." You mutter under your breath as you enter the shooting area.

Multiple set pieces and lights, bustling people hurrying from one set to another, sounds of photos being taken, bright flashes, and shouts from one side of the room to another. Models in flashy apparel, makeup artists, and stylists are ready to touch up anyone who needs it.

As you come face to face with the sight, you have to refrain from cursing underneath your breath.

"Ah Yen, good you're ready." At the voice, you blink out of your reverie only to find Sejin standing before the three of you. "Thank you for doing this again."

The head of BTS' management team, you've only met the man once before. He looks the same as he did then. Tall and intimidating, burly but with kind eyes. Graying black hair and signature glasses rest on his nose, a soft smile always playing on his lips. He puts you at ease, gives you a sense of familiarity and comfort.

"Of course, sir." You bow your head respectfully towards him, ignoring the incredulous look Jin makes beside you.

"Favoritism." He murmurs under his breath, and you wonder silently if Sejin will notice you elbowing him hard in his gut.

"They won't show your face that much, so all you have to do is stand there and look pretty for the camera. Simple enough, right?" Sejin explains, either pretending to be or completely oblivious to the exchange you and Jin just had. You nod as he turns away, picking up a call from his phone.

"Yeah..." You shakily look down at your hands, praying for them to stop shaking. "Simple."

Namjoon glances your way and reaches for your hand, prepared to offer you some words of encouragement, but another voice breaks through the chaos and he flinches away as soon as your head snaps up once more.

"Let's get going everyone!"

A man stands amidst the bustling crowd, with a clipboard in his hands and an earpiece secured in his ear. A couple of people are constantly trailing after him, asking questions and then darting away to carry out another set of tasks. He wears extravagant yet down-to-earth clothing, something that lets you know he's important but still a part of the background.

"Who's..." you start to say, but Namjoon, following your gaze, already answering your question as he folds his arms.

"That's the director for the shoot." He sighs, almost in exhaustion. Jin nods at his explanation getting the same worn-out look on his face at the sight of the man.

"He's just a little...eccentric." He adds to Namjoon's assumption, and you can't help but snort. Luckily, Jin doesn't seem to notice.

"That's rich coming from you." You mutter under your breath, holding your hand over your mouth to conceal your small giggles of laughter. Namjoon nudges you again to remind you to be respectful, but even he can't keep the smile off his face at the comparison.

"You must be Yen!"

At the shout from across the studio, you flinch as you turn to see the director just a few feet away from you. He takes your hand in his and shakes it excitably, and you have to resist the urge to remind him of personal space.

"My name is Deokhwa, thank you for filling in today."

You smile weakly at his enthusiasm, trying to read his excitement and understand why it's necessary.

"It's no problem."

Almost as soon as he was by your side, he turns on his heel and heads the other way once more calling out instructions to the staff members scuttling around.

"Can we get Taehyung and Jungkook into hair and makeup, please?! This should have been done ages ago!" With wide eyes, you watch him leave, your hand still outstretched where he had shaken it moments ago.

"Is he always like this?"

"Sometimes it's worse," Jin whispers in your ear, and you can't help it, you laugh, any hostility held against him now gone. There wasn't any reason for you to be mad at him, but it's just startling.

Aren't you supposed to be prepared for things like this? But standing here, you couldn't feel more out of place.

"Suga and Jimin, get into costume! Someone touch up Yoongi's hair please, he fell asleep...again."

Swallowing hard, you consider turning on your heel and running out of there. You wonder what they'd do if you just gave everything up now. You'd be okay, right? You've dealt with letting down people before. This wouldn't be anything different.

Then you remember.

The only person you'd be hurting would be yourself.

Clenching your jaw tight, you root your feet to the ground, refusing to let yourself get intimidated. Yes, you're not fully prepared, but you can do this. You have to do this.

"Hoseok!" Deokhwa calls for Jhope who's dawdling around near Suga. He turns at the sound of his name, Yoongi opening an eye, half-delirious and half annoyed. "Are you ready?"

"Yes sir!" He nods, a little too excited. Suga winces from his place beside Jhope, and pulls a pillow off the couch he was sleeping on.

"Then you and Yen can go first, alright?" Deokhwa decides, crossing something off of his clipboard. Jhope nods, saluting the director with a wide smile.

"Roger that!" He shouts once more, unbeknownst of Yoongi winding up behind him, and smacking the pillow straight into his back. Jhope shrieks, startled before turning to Suga and delving into a slight argument.

Namjoon, shaking his head at the encounter, almost forgets that you're right beside him. It's only when you take a deep breath to steady your nerves does he remember, turning to you. Biting his bottom lip, he considers reaching out to console you but pulls away hesitantly. Instead, he clears his throat, gathering your attention.

"Don't worry so much." He murmurs, glancing your way and sending you a slightly awkward but reassuring smile. "You can do this."

You return the smile, finding his concern to be comforting before turning to Deokhwa and heading over there to meet Jhope.

Maybe he's right, maybe you can do this.

Or maybe you're in over your head.

Standing in the middle of the set, you find yourself freezing, unable to move at the sight of so many eyes on you, so many cameras pointed your way. Ready to capture your every move, your every expression, your every misstep. You can't move, afraid that you'll screw everything up. Everything is so perfect, everything is set where it's supposed to be, what if you'll break it when you touch it? Anxiety growing larger and larger within your gut you try your hardest not to break down.

Why did they think you were ready for this? You don't even know what to do, much less how to do it even if you could figure out how to move again. Deokhwa tries his hardest to give you directions, but it's lost within the noise in your head. Static grows, mixing in with the bright lights and eyes staring at you, waiting to devour you and pick you apart as though you were a doll meant for their enjoyment.

When his hand wraps around your arm, sending warmth throughout your shaking body, you find yourself completely helpless. He pulls you to his side, his hands strong and sure behind you, making sure that you won't fall on his watch. You look to him, wondering if he can see how vulnerable you are at the moment, wondering if he knows that you aren't as strong as you pretend to be.

Jhope only smiles, brushing your hair off of your forehead and giving you a soft kiss in their place. You blink, shocked at the sudden show of affection, and equally as shocked when the camera flashes, taking a shot of the encounter.

Flinching, you turn to the camera, and the director, who's grinning from ear to ear. "That was great! Keep it up you two! And Yen, it's okay to be nervous at first, don't worry you'll get the hang of it."

Sheepishly, you nod, any fear or anxiety you had before quickly fading away in an instant. As the shooting commences, you turn to Jhope who has since let go of you and let out a soft sigh of relief.

"Thank you."

Hoseok glances at you from the corner of his eye, chuckling to himself as he takes your hands and leads you over to another section of the set. Dubiously still posing for the cameramen of the shoot. You notice, and can't help but smile. He really is kind.

"For what?"

At his question, you give him a look, but the innocent smile on his face only grows wider. It's a smile that tells you he knows exactly what he did, but he won't admit to it. You roll your eyes at the notion, finding it so like him, and yet so infuriating.

Instead, he picks up a bouquet and hands it to you. "There's nothing to thank me for, it's only right to help out someone new on set."

You take the flowers delicately into your hands, finding them to be an exquisite array of daffodils and sunflowers, a few peonies dotted here and there. You raise the flowers to your face, inhaling the sweet scent. As you do, Jhope smiles affectionately, multiple flashes from the camera capturing every second. However, the two of you are too distracted to care.

"Do you know what these flowers mean?" He asks you, and you look up at him, shaking your head silently. He chuckles at the curious spark in your eye and takes one of the daffodil petals into his hands, stepping closer to you.

"Daffodil's represent rebirth and new beginnings." He explains. "The first bloom after winter fades."

New beginnings. You wonder if there's any left for you to find.

"The sunflower is simple. A sign of happiness and good fortune. Peonies are difficult, however."

"How so?" You ask him, and he smiles, lifting a one from the bouquet.

"They mean something different all over the world. In Greece, they are known to represent bashfulness. In Japan, they're associated with bravery and honor." Looking up at you through his long eyelashes, he brushes his finger across your cheek as he tucks the flower behind your ear. "Generally though, they can be known to represent prosperity and love."

At the mention of the word, both of you look at the other. There's something in his eyes, something that reminds you of the way Jungkook has looked at you before. The same electrifying look that Taehyung has sent your way. The same connection you shared with the masked man.

He only pulls away from your touch long enough to set the flowers aside, then his hands reach for yours and they soon intertwine together.

Maybe it's the strange feeling of the set or the weird way the flowers have resonated with you, but you can feel your heartbeat increasing with every step he takes towards you. He presses his forehead against yours, and you find yourself avoiding his eyes, your cheeks flushing a bright red. Swallowing hard, you look up to find his eyes hooded, all traces of his once comforting smile now gone and replaced with something more sentimental.

"What?" you whisper.

"What do you mean?" This time, he doesn't smile innocently, instead, his warm hands tighten around yours, creating a cocoon around the two of you. You take a shaky breath, trying to refuse the loud pounding of your heart in your ears.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

He offers you no answer, only takes a step closer, your bodies now able to feel the other's warmth. A comforting feeling, one that lets you know that you still breathe and feel the same if not a bit different from the other. He presses his thumb against your cheek, rubbing it softly over your skin in a delicate motion. With wide eyes, you look up at him, wondering what is there that has entranced him so.

"Did you know you have a freckle here?"

Before you can move or even respond, Deokhwa's voice cuts through the cocoon, and the both of you are brought back to the harsh reality you had once escaped from in the arms of the other.

"Alright! That's a wrap, good job you two. Hoseok you can now get changed for your solo shots, and Namjoon get ready you'll be next."

When Jhope pulls away, you find yourself frozen, and confused.

Was that...was that all an act?

Watching him bow slightly to the director and cameramen, but still stay a considerable distance away from you, you can't help but feel a bit slighted. It all felt so real. Could he really have been faking it--?

And so what if he had?

Blushing profusely, you place your hands on your cheeks cursing and begging the rosy hue to erase itself from your skin.

Honestly, Yen, what were you expecting? He doesn't even know you that well, certainly not as well as Namjoon or Tae...

And why are you bringing those two into this?!

Inwardly, you groan. Having all of these idols around you 24/7 isn't doing any favors for your heart. Biting your bottom lip, you feel the darkness growing inside of you once more as you remember your promise.

Not now Yen.

Not yet.

Chuckling nervously, you turn to Jhope.

"You're good at this."

Hoseok looks towards you, once more feigning innocence. You almost want to strangle that puppy dog look from his eyes. It's as though he refuses to show you a real side to him. It's maddening, you can't seem to figure him out.

"What do you mean?" he asks, and you force a smile, beneath your grimace. Taking a deep breath, you pull the peony from your ear, smiling softly.

"You know...faking." You say the word before you realize how insulting it could be interpreted. At Hoseok's slight eyebrow raise, you grimace noting that he took it exactly that way. You stammer, scrambling for the right way to make up for your wrong usage of words. "I mean, you're a good actor! I almost believed that was real."

Jhope looks as though he wants to say something in response, but before he can, Deokhwa call from beyond the set, near a couple of stylists touching up Namjoon's makeup before he heads up.

"Come on you two! Come take a look at the monitor."

You nod, silently thanking God for giving you a weird and eccentric director. You don't notice the odd way Hoseok is looking at you, nor do you realize that he's taken a step closer to you. Placing his hand on your shoulder, you jump a bit, turning to him, but his lips are already by your ear, his breath hot and dancing on your skin.

You try your hardest not to shiver as he whispers his next words, the sound reverberating in your eardrums.

"I wasn't faking anything."

𝔞/𝔫: i feel like we have hardly any Jhope moments so here you go! i hope this is a nice one, even if it's kind of short ;-;

chapter 36 here

check the Infinite Stars masterlist for more chapters

check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

check out my masterlist for other kpop fanfics

[cardigansandtea]

he’s a total catch

“You ever coming to the party?” Sirius is somehow leaning on the bathroom doorframe despite Remus’s very-much-locked apartment and Sirius’s definite lack of a key.

“If I can ever find my phone, sure. Stop staring and help me look.”

Sirius, very helpfully, doesn’t move. “What’re you supposed to be?” He’s grinning now, the prat, looking at Remus’s very boring sweater.

“Nothing, yet. Marlene’s been staring at me and whispering to Lily this whole week, I figured there was no point in dressing up if they’re gonna have me change the second I walk in.”

Sirius catches his eye in the mirror and gives that funny little half-smile, the one that makes Remus think he’s got something stuck on his chin. “They’re gonna put you in something ridiculous, you know.”

“Yeah, well, if I get drunk enough off your whiskey to let them, I really don’t think I’ll care. You, um –” Remus turns around finally, looks Sirius up and down. Chokes on his breath. It should be criminal for anyone to look that good in a low-buttoned shirt and white jeans. He clears his throat, tries again. “You don’t look any different than normal, either.” He’s lying through his teeth; Sirius looks somehow the same as always and yet hotter, but that’s not something he can say to his best mate, so he keeps his mouth shut.

“Dorcas lent me some makeup.” Code for Sirius stole Dorcas’s makeup bag last month and still hasn’t given it back.

“Ah,” Remus says, eloquently. Now that he’s mentioned it, there’s definitely a sharper angle to his jawline and an unnatural glow above his cheekbones. It’s a good look on him.

Sirius steps closer to Remus. “I was going for Bowie,” he says, gesturing to his eyes which are dusted with gold.

“It, um.” His mouth is dry. “It suits you.”

That half smile has turned into a full grin, the quick kind that means trouble, the kind Remus always catches a half-second too late.

“You should try it.”

“Bowie? Don’t think he’ll have me.” Remus is distracted now, almost misses Sirius’s hand traveling to his back pocket and producing a black eyeliner pencil. He steps forward and Remus takes a half-step back, legs hitting the sink cabinet behind them.

They’re nearly touching now, and Sirius holds up the pen and tilts his head like a question, and Remus nods and forgets how to breathe in the same second.

Sirius murmurs a look up and tilts Remus’s chin back. His hand is cold despite Lily keeping the apartment at least five degrees above what it should be. His metal rings, digging into the back of Remus’s neck as he holds him in place, are colder. His breath is warm though, and Remus can feel it on his cheek more than he can feel the pencil running along his lower lid.

It feels like he’s there for ages, staring at Sirius’s long lashes and the bridge of his nose and trying to slow his heartbeat and not blinking even though his right eye is beginning to water. And just like that, the pressure on his neck is gone and there’s space between them and Remus starts breathing again.

“If you’ve made me look like I’ve got a black eye I’m washing it off.” Remus can’t bring himself to look away just yet. Staring another second won’t hurt.

Sirius doesn’t seem to be in much better shape, capping the pencil with a vaguely shaky hand. His shoulders are loose and thrown back in a way that means he’s trying too hard to look relaxed. His cheeks are tinged pink. He wasn’t wearing blush.

“Don’t be silly, I gave you two,” Sirius says. “Any punk can walk around with just one.”

Remus turns to the mirror just as Sirius leaves the bathroom. “Five minutes, Remus,” he calls. “We’ve gotta get there before James finishes my whiskey and you don’t get drunk enough to wear Mar’s stupid costume.”

He’s not got any black eyes. He just looks more intense than usual – the eyeliner’s given his eyes sharp corners that fade into a softer line towards the center.

“The party only started twenty minutes ago, Sirius. It’ll take him at least thirty to finish it. And – shit, my phone, can you ring it?”

“I’ve got it in my pocket,” Sirius calls back. “Let’s go, old man.”

[mendesbadrepuation]

Bachata // Sebastian Stan

Once again TikTok has inspired me and inspired this little one shot/imagine/pov. Whatever you prefer to call it. I decided to post this one because I simply knew it would sit around in my drafts collecting vast amounts of mold and dust. I had lots and lots of fun with writing this. I did a little research on this dance and even found a song. Hope everyone enjoys :)

Bachata is a form of dancing. Very sexy and very intimate at times. 

Background: Y/n is a famous actress learning a new dance for a scene in her movie. Her co-star Sebastian Stan is her partner learning just as much as she is. They might even learn something else along the way. Feelings perhaps?

tw- not any that I can think of. loads of fluff and vast amounts of fun!

▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️ 

“Alright you two! Get warmed up and comfortable.” Our dance instructor informs us as the music begins blasting through the studio. I make sure my heels are strapped in and I look up at Sebastian. Today he had on black basketball shorts with a graphic white tee. There was this obvious scruff across his chin and jawline. It really brought out all his features.

He was walking towards me in a funny way. His arms and legs were throwing out into this strange dance move. When your characters are professional dancers and your person playing them are not. This is what happens. I start to lightly laugh and walk towards him to the beat of the music. Our instructor has us do this everyday before we rehearse our big dance scene. It helps us get comfortable with one another and shake whatever maybe in our minds from that day away. It was a good coaching technique if you ask me. 

We join our hands together at the drop of the beat. We don’t follow our steps and just dance how we like. It was fun and that’s what made this entire experience a little better. I focus on making light steps with my heels so it looks more elegant as the instructor would say. She’s also the entire choreographer for this movie so she knew a thing or two. Part of me was also focusing on not falling on my face every step I took. I was never use to wearing heels in general. Now I was being pushed to dance in them. This instructor has pushed me in ways I never knew before. 

“This a new top?” Sebastian asks as he pulls me into his chest. They press together and I sway my hips to the beat. One of his hands goes to my waist guiding them towards his thigh.

“Yeah. You like it?” I look up into his eyes as our faces were inches apart. He grins at me when our eyes lock. All I had on was a simple cropped spaghetti strap tank. It was this mint green kind of color. A new color for me.

“Cute.” He replies making my face red. Sebastian made it his goal to make me blush everyday. I don’t know how it became this game for him but it did. Sometimes he didn’t even have to try. He’d simply look at me a certain way and my face was red as a tomato. 

However, being in these close situations it helped for him to lighten the mood. He done that very often. Especially when I would get frustrated with a certain move I had trouble getting down. We really bonded through this film and all that has came with it. I was excited to learn this new dance and tell all my friends I can. Of course they would get to see it on screen when the film comes out. 

“Okay! Get into your first positions and let’s start at the beginning and work our way into where we left off yesterday.” The instructor commands us. We step away from each other and go to our designated positions. We stand on each side of the studio across from each other. I lean my back against the mirror in the way the instructor told me to. Sebastian had one leg propped against the wall with his arms crossed in front of his chest. 

Our characters were designated to be in the beautiful city of Italy. Seb and I were excited to film there when the time came. Which was coming soon. Our special dance scene was coming together and before we knew it we’d be ready to fully put it together. We had two more parts to get down. The finale was suppose to make people cry apparently. That is if we do our jobs right. Which I had faith in Sebastian and I. We’ve worked so hard for this film. 

The song begins to play. *Promise Romeo Santos (ft. Usher)* 

I push off the wall and seductively walk towards Sebastian. Our eye contact was locked in with each other. I walk a circle around him as he stands in place. My finger drags across his back very slowly. His neck was turned toward his shoulder so he could try to catch a glimpse of me. When I reach around his front our eyes lock again. My body gets closer until he places his hands on my hips pulling me right into his body. I rest my hands on his shoulders for a moment letting him guide my hips to the music. 

Our faces were inches apart as we stared into each other’s souls. It felt as if our hearts were dancing together when we did dance. That’s how romantic and sexy this dance really was. I glide my hands up to his neck to cup it gently. It makes our connection stronger in the moment. He starts to take his steps backing me up. I flow backwards with him helping me guide the way. If we didn’t trust each other then this dance would not work. 

My right arm extends out as Sebastian used one arm to lift me up. My legs remained straight and I held my grip firmly on his shoulders to keep my form. His head was angled right into my lower chest. He keeps his focus on me as I turn my head to the side closing my eyes. I felt the breeze from him spinning me around. I tuck my knees in and bring my hand back down to his shoulders. He lifts me up and over his leg where I rest behind his thigh for a second. 

He pulls me back over and I place my feet back down to the ground. His hands let go of my waist as I step away from him. Sebastian does his individual steps as I walk around him making sure all the attention was towards him. When he bows I began my individual steps. My last step brought me back into his arms. His large hands made their way to my hips once more. He brings me towards him as I straddled his thigh. With the beat of the music I grind my hips into his thigh. We never lost eye contact in this moment. My heart was racing at the intimacy this part held. 

“One two three.” Sebastian whispers the count directly next to my ear giving me the cue to step back just enough for him to grab my hand as I extend myself out. He lets me spin out only to bring me back in. Once more I straddled his thigh and grind into his thigh. This time my hips come up a little higher and Sebastian meets me. Our bodies collide perfectly together. It was as if we were made for each other. 

Without any hesitation Sebastian spins me around by my hips so now my back is pressed against his chest. His right hand trails up my side towards my stomach and directly through the valley of breasts. My heart flutters when I felt his hand around my neck pushing me into him more. On beat we practically snap our necks to look each other in the eyes again. His hand around my neck now goes up to my face where he softly rubs his thumb across my cheek bone. My hips sway against him slowly as the music begins to fade from the instructor controlling it. 

“That was awesome you two! Absolutely beautiful! Let’s finish this last part and you guys will be ready to put it all together for the final scene.” She announces as she goes over in front of us. She explains the new steps thoroughly making sure we understood first. Then she takes each of us and guides us how to do what and where to look. 

The final part added a sexy flair with so much passionate romance. It felt like I was watching a movie myself when she used Sebastian to show me my steps. Sebastian listened as intently as he could. I catch him staring at me at one point and all I could do was smile at him. We were sweaty and tired from the hours of practice. I could see it on both of our faces. We never had the thought of giving up though. 

Once we learned the steps it was time for rehearsing it. The finale of this scene really tied the entire dance together. At the very end Sebastian and I were set to have our big kiss. The choreographer did not want us to kiss yet so the passion will let itself develop in the final dance. You could guess I was pretty excited about kissing my scene partner.

_______

The magic was in the air here in Italy. It was time for our big dance scene to come alive tonight. The directors and producers chose a nice little alley way between these bright pink buildings. Around us was all the Italy architecture you could imagine. This city truly was gorgeous in every aspect. 

“Are you ready?” My stylist asks me as she is finishing up the touches on my hair and makeup. The costume director chose for me to be in a silk black two piece dress. The top piece had an A-line design with spaghetti straps. The skirt part was completely silk with two slits on either side. That way it would show off my legs for the dance. Just to add a little spice he chose red satin heels with an ankle strap. The heels I had been practicing in to be exact. 

“Nervous. But ready.” I reply to her. I look at her  through the mirror and see a soft smile on both of our faces. 

“You’ve got this. No reason for you to be nervous.” She encourages. “Besides. This is your big moment to kiss Sebastian.” She smirks at me making my cheeks red. 

“Y/n It’s time!” The director calls from the other side of the tent. My stylist fluffs my hair one more time and sends me on my way. I walk outside of the changing tent and step into the bright sunny day of Italy. The crew all looked towards me which made me blush wildly. Big smiles land on their faces and it boosts my confidence. 

“Go ahead and get in your place Y/n. Sebastian is on his way!” The choreographer commands me and I nod my head making my way over to the marker. I lean against the wall and focus on my breathing. This is what we had been working for. 

To keep the suspense Sebastian and I were positioned to look in opposite directions. I had no idea what he was wearing and he had no idea what I would be wearing. The thought of how handsome he could look was circling in my brain. My stomach was beginning to be filled with nervousness as we wait for the action to be called. I focus on an object off in the distance. 

“Ready. ACTION!” The director calls. The music begins to play and I take in a deep breath. 

My head slowly turns towards Sebastian standing opposite of me. Our eyes meet at the same time and I watch him take in a breath. He was beyond the words of handsome. They chose to put him in a white linen button down with the buttons open midway to his chest. The shirt hugged his shoulders perfectly making him look so muscular. And he was. He had on these nice gray pants that were loose enough for dancing but looked as if they fit like dress pants. My God is hair was styled perfectly back. Just enough gel to give it a little raise and the rest was just this fluffy bounce. My heart rose to my throat and it took me a moment to snap back. 

Luckily I had practiced the routine so much that my feet took control at the start of the music. I elegantly walk to Sebastian as he walks to me. We didn’t remove our eyes from each other just like before. My heart was pounding when I was just close enough to see the shining blue in his eyes. The moment his hands come in contact with my hips a spark was sent through my body. His fingertips just barely graze my exposed skin on my waist. It makes my head spin from the minimal touch. 

We continue through the routine just like we practiced. The passion and romance was every bit there. I felt it in my chest the way he would guide me, touch me, and hold me. When he spins me around and pressed my back up against his chest I felt my knees becoming weak. Just the fragile way he pressed his fingertips into my skin to pull me closer to him was enough to make me fall apart. I was trying to remain professional but it was hard with those blue orbs seeping into me. 

Just as we approach the final part I felt butterflies erupting like a volcano in my stomach. Sebastian pulls me in as close as he can. One hand holds my waist while the other held my back. I felt him start to lean me down for the special dip. The music comes to a slow as he brings me back upright. My hand cups his cheek and our breathing was heavy. Our chests rise and fall hard against one another. 

Our faces inch closer and closer. Instinctively our eyes shut just as our lips collide for the first time. My heart pounds hard against my chest that I could hear it in my ears. Sebastian deepens the kiss making me so light headed. I felt as if I was floating. He grazes his tongue across my bottom lip allowing him further access. His tongue was gentle and not too forceful. I’ve had many stage kisses but never has one made me feel this way before. 

We pull back for air and stare into each other’s eyes. The director calls cut but Sebastian doesn’t loosen his grip or move an inch. I stay put still looking into his eyes. 

“That was awesome you two! I’m so proud!” The choreographer announces and I take a step back letting my grip fall. My hands rest at my sides as I couldn’t contain the blush from appearing on my face. 

Sebastian had this grin on his face as he continues to look at me. His eyes look from my head to my toe once more. “You are absolutely gorgeous.” He compliments. If it was possible my face got 10x more red. 

“Thank you Sebastian.” I barely muster up the words to reply. “You look very handsome.” This time he looks to his right and a subtle blush appears on his face. 

“Thank you.” He scratches the back of his head to ease his nerves. There was an obvious connection between the two of us. However, something was holding us back from just admitting it. We wanted each other but we wanted to remain professionals. 

After filming was over with for the movie I was sad to leave. Who wouldn’t be? I have grown such a connection with all of these people. Shortly after filming Sebastian reached out to me. It was just a simple text message. Should it have gave me the amount of butterflies it did? 

Would I ever be able to dance with you like that again? 

I couldn’t help but smile down at my phone. “What are you smiling at over there?” My best friend asks me. I shake my head trying to contain myself. 

“Nothing to worry about.” I reply shortly and think of a message back. 

If you’re lucky ;) 

I tried to be flirty but also not give away the fact that I was crushing hard on a fellow co-star. Somehow I just knew Sebastian was going to become a big part of my life. He reads the message and I see the bubble pop up. Just as fast as it pops up it disappears. I let a soft sigh out. 

“Hey look Y/n! Isn’t that Sebastian?” Another one of my friends ask. We were all having a nice time catching up at my place. I had been gone for months so they didn’t have to do much begging when it came to hanging out. 

The tv was playing the in background. I scramble around finding the remote turning the volume up. There he was on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Falon. My heart starts to rapidly beat in my chest at the looks of him. A black suit jacket with a floral button down underneath. His hair styled back with some gel. Once again he was just as handsome as the day I first met him. 

“So Sebastian! You’ve got a new movie coming out with none other Y/n y/l/n. You know she’s one of my favorites on this show. How was it working with her?” My breath caught in my throat as my friends slightly squeal with the mention of my name. 

“Oh wow. It was the best. She’s an absolute sweetheart! I can’t count the times she made my heart skip a beat.” He playfully clutches his chest. I thought I was going to faint. The crowd on the show erupts into cheers from the comment. 

“Woah woah woah! Seems to me like there is some chemistry behind the scenes.” Jimmy replies egging him on. He looks down into his lap with a soft smile. 

“There was definitely some moments throughout filming that had...” he pauses to think about his words. “Sparks flying I guess you could say.” Jimmy leans back in his chair in shock as the crowd gets louder. 

“The producer so graciously let me have this little clip of a special scene that you all shared. Let’s watch shall we?” He gestures to another screen and the clip begins rolling. It was a small trailer that I actually hadn’t seen yet. Flashes of my face throughout filming appear. Scenes that we developed. 

I see the clip of the beginning of the dance scene. The very moment we looked at each other it only showed Sebastian’s reaction. It zooms on his face and in his eyes I swear I saw a twinkle. Nice editing if you ask me. My heart jumps to my throat as the clip fades out. Sebastian is leaning back in his chair with an obvious blush on his cheeks. 

“Let’s talk about that look man.” Jimmy says. Sebastian starts shaking his head. He had a big smile on his face. It’s like he was lost in his thoughts. 

“That reaction was completely real. Our choreographer had us look away until the director called action. So for lack of better words. She took my breath away.” Jimmy covers his mouth in shock and the crowd was even more crazy. My jaw drops to the floor at his words. 

“Wow. Seems like you two are starting a new romance Sebastian!” Jimmy says and I’m about to pass out from this entire interview. 

“Yeah. If I’m lucky.” He smoothly winks at Jimmy. I knew what that meant. I just sent those words to him. My entire body was on an adrenaline rush. 

“What does that mean!?” My friend asks in a high pitch. She was trying to contain her excitement but it was no use. 

I look over at her with the biggest smirk on my face. My friends jump up from their seats circling around me in pure excitement. Thousands of questions were being shout out in my direction. 

“Guys!” I laugh trying to get them to calm down. “When I say I’ve never had a stage kiss like his before. I mean it.” They shout in even more excitement. 

“Well you’ve heard it hear live. Go check out this romantic new movie when it hits a theatre near you!” Jimmy closes the interview. Sebastian stands up waving to the crowd. The show goes to commercial and I’m still standing there speechless at his words. Was this really happening? 

I bring my phone up. Without any hesitation I click on his messages again. Out of nerves I bite the inside of my cheek contemplating my next move. 

“Whatever you’re about to say to him. Say it!” My friend encourages. I glance up at them and back to my phone. 

Will you take my breath away if we dance again? 

My cheesy reply still makes my heart pound in my chest. I wait a little over a minute and my phone buzzes against my hand. 

If you’ll give me the chance I will hopefully do more than that. 

I bite my lip to try and suppress the emotions circulating through my body. 

Time and place? 

My fingers come up to my lips as I nervously bite at one of my nails. 

7 tomorrow night at my place. I’ll pick you up. 

My eyes grow wide in surprise. This was really happening. I was planning a date with Sebastian Stan. 

I’ll bring an inhaler just in case :) 

I couldn’t ignore the wave of nausea building up in my stomach. 

Good idea. I’ll bring a crash cart. Just in case your gorgeous self sends me into cardiac arrest. 

My eyes roll at the flirtatious comeback. I leave the message open and explain to my friends we had to find an outfit quickly. 

I was going on a date with Sebastian Stan. 

▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️▪️

like, comment, or reblog for a part two? Thank you for reading guys!!!! :))

[writersrealmbts]

Diamond Tears and Little Wings: Part 6

Description: You’re a fairy, taken in by BTS. You need lots of love and care, otherwise your light will fade and you turn to stone. Between the seven of them, you should never feel unloved. Right?

Warnings: N/A

Posted: 02/25/2021

Tags: bts x reader, ot7

Fluff: 1,412 words

A/N: One of these days I’ll get back into the swing of Clearwater Springs. Anyway, this is part 6 of 7, so we’re almost done! Yay!

There was some activity inside, but a few moments after you entered the staff started excusing themselves.

At first the boys didn’t seem to notice, gathering their things and talking about nonsense things as though nervous. Anticipating.

Emotional.

Then you heard a gasp.

And Namjoon was whipping around, rushing away from the mirror, and hugging you tightly, his breathing labored but completely wordless.

The others were quick to pull the two of you further into the room so that there was room for all of them in the group hug.

Finally breaking out of the group hug, Namjoon gently kissed you on the lips. “We missed you so much, baby.”

You just sobbed in response, letting yourself be turned into Jin’s firm embrace.

Then Yoongi’s gentle hug.

Hobi’s tight hug, with little kisses pressed into your hair.

Taehyung, with a soft peck to the lips and a promise to never lose you again.

Jungkook, fierce and protective, holding you until Jimin made a desperate sort of choked noise.

“I thought I was hallucinating,” Jimin choked out, wrapped completely around you, face nuzzled in.

But when you were out of their embrace, they could see the bruising where the makeup had wiped away.

You stutteringly explained everything that had happened, and that Alena was the family of a fairy friend who had taken you in so that they wouldn’t blame her. You told them about hearing their CD’s and changing Cupcake’s name to Keyowo, the fairies at the market figuring out who you were before you did, and the family you had lived with.

Hobi’s mouth was a triangle.

“Now can we plan murder?” Yoongi asked, glowering at the floor and trying to discretely wipe away his tears.

“Aish,” Jin sighed, closing his eyes.

“That wasn’t a no,” Taehyung commented.

“No murder. Just take me home,” You intervened when you saw Hoseok was contemplating it. You weren’t going to let your sunshine dim himself with that sort of guilt. Or any of your boys for that matter. “Please? I just want to be home.”

Jungkook pulled you back to him, pressing a kiss firmly to your lips, and sighing in relief when he pulled away. “I thought I’d never get to do that.”

Then you were drowning in kisses from the three youngest boys, and you were totally drunk on it.

“Alright, enough, we don’t need her to have a mental implosion like last time,” Jin basically shoved Jungkook onto the couch and elbowed his way between the other two. “Let’s finish getting cleaned up, then she can tell her friend that she’s going back to the hotel with us tonight and we’ll pick up her stuff tomorrow. She’ll stay in Jimin’s room tonight—”

Taehyung and Jungkook and someone else started protesting but Jin quickly cut them off.

“—But only because he’s been doing so poorly and they could both do with some extra cuddles. She’s been gone a while so we can’t overwhelm her with an abundance of love right off the bat. She’s already looking a little overwhelmed.”

“Hyung is right,” Namjoon chimed in, sounding hoarse. “We have another concert tomorrow, too. We should get back and get some rest.”

The boys reluctantly agreed and started gathering their things.

You were usually holding onto one of their hands, not willing to let go for anything.

Alena was completely understanding, and the boys asked a couple of the security guards to walk her to her car for safety.

Then you were in the van with Jimin and Jungkook, and you kept wiping Jungkook’s tears with your coat sleeve so it was quite damp by the time you arrived at the hotel, and your shoulder was damp from Jimin crying on it.

But things were calmer after Jimin had showered, and eaten (something you did with him because you were honestly worried), and then you cuddled up with him in bed much earlier than he probably would have normally gone to sleep.

Jimin sighed shakily as he held you tightly. “I kept thinking I could find you. You couldn’t be far. If I just searched long enough I could find you and bring you home and everything would be okay again. I wasn’t really in my right mind for a lot of it. I had a bad fever for a few weeks and they had to put me on some medicine for a while. I’m better than I was, don’t worry, I just…it took me a while to work through it all.”

You kissed his shoulder since it was all you could kiss in the tight embrace, then gently pushed away, and you blew a little sleep dust at him—just as you had given each of the other boys a little sleep dust to use when they were in bed—to ensure that he would sleep well.

And in the morning, you made sure Jimin ate breakfast, feeding him each bite because he liked that and you completely understood why. But you needed to see him eat because he had felt so bony all through the night.

All of the boys were awake (though the level of awareness varied quite widely), and all of them insisted on going with you back to Frida’s house to get your things.

None of them were very happy about your bruises, especially since they were far more visible without any makeup.

But they were very kind to Alena, Agnar, and Frida, and they cooed over Keyowo, apologizing again that you couldn’t bring him with you.

Agnar didn’t look at all sorry, even though he also apologized about you not being able to take Keyowo. But he also promised to take good care of him, and that was enough for you.

You had your boys back.

Then you were back at the hotel, in pixie form, resting in Yoongi’s room until it was time for their concert, then you were in Jin’s room, playing games because he had his computer and you were not about to subject yourself to a second concert. You’d barely survived the first one.

But it wasn’t bad for them to be gone from you. You knew that their love for you was greater than what a few hours separation would constitute.

That night they were all gathered in Jin’s room, catching you up on everything that had happened since the moment they had taken you away. How the company came around, how badly the boys fared themselves and had to catch each other before they all crumbled. You could tell there were things they were holding back, especially given what Jimin had already told you.

Then they approached the topic of the rest of the tour.

You quickly assured them that you were fine with them finishing it as long as you could be with them. “Home is where the heart is, right? Well, you guys are my heart and you’re here. I couldn’t break your hearts just because you wanted to give me what I asked for and take me back to Korea. Korea is just a place. It just happens to be the place of the people who love me enough that I’m able to love them in return.”

And then Hoseok was crying again.

You flew over to him, in a smaller form because it had honestly been weeks since you were small and now you had to work your way down again.

He cuddled you close and pressed little kisses to your face and hair, upset but not able to voice the reason. Not that there was much mystery regarding the reason.

When he had calmed down some, you cupped his face in your hands and gently kissed him, not missing the way his breath hitched or the tiny sound he made. The last to have a real kiss, your poor sunshine.

And all of you spent the night together, because apparently the boys were out of willpower—though they still needed some magic sleeping dust to get to sleep at a decent time.

Yoongi easily claimed a spot beside you, and Taehyung was quick to claim your other side.

Jimin huffed and ended up laying on top of all three of you.

Jungkook was pressed against Tae’s back.

Hoseok slept next to Jungkook.

Jin backhugged Namjoon and took him down, essentially initially forcing him to cuddle Yoongi, but the two switched places and Jin slept with his back against Yoongi’s, holding onto Namjoon.

Your lovely boys.

–

Previous  ~  Next

Masterlist  -  ot7 Masterpost

Tagging: @alex–awesome–22, @bryvada, @missmoxxiesworld​  @subzerobts​     @forvever-ddaeng​  @vividwoosan   @mischiefmakerliesmith5  @beach-bitch-bitch-beach  @minmeowmeowcuddles  @kpopfictrash @castlewolfsbane @scatkpoptrash​  @knjhe​  @i-dont-even-know-fck @soulphoenix1618 @kerikaaria @sea-nevermind-enthusiast @reinaxans @mcusuperfreak​

If you would like to be tagged: DTLW Taglist (please make sure you can be tagged, I’m no longer hunting people down, ALSO PLEASE NOTE THERE’S ONLY ONE PART LEFT)

[dreamypeaches]

time to ourselves | vince dunn x reader

summary: after the birth of your son, you and your husband finally find some time to yourselves. 

warnings: SMUT, daddy kink, choking, cursing, spanking 

word count: 1.7k

a/n: so i’m turning into a hockey blog now ig. i post too much smut, but i have a barzy fic coming soon that is mostly plot, but ofc there will be smut in there

It wasn’t often you got time to yourselves. 10 months ago, you’d given birth to a beautiful baby boy. He had Vince’s curls and your eyes, and now that he was walking, Vince’s energy. When you weren’t chasing him around the house, you were wrestling him down for a nap or trying to get him to eat at least one bite of the food you made. You loved your little one dearly, and so did Vince, but Vince wasn’t always there, busy with practice or out on the road, leaving you at your wits end some days. You missed your husband and you missed the mind-blowing sex you two used to have. Lately, if you weren’t too tired to form a coherent thought, it was mostly some quick missionary sex or Vince going down on you if he was in the mood. Tonight, you wanted to change that. You needed him more than you needed anything else, and your son had blessed you by falling asleep early with no trouble.

While Vince was busy finishing up the dishes, like the wonderful husband he was, you got ready in your bathroom. It had been a while since you wore any makeup, so you kept it simple, a little mascara, and Vince’s favorite shade of lipstick on you. Stripping down you tried to avoid looking at yourself in the mirror. You know Vince would always love your body, but you couldn’t help but dislike the way you looked. You had yet to lose your pregnancy weight and your stomach and thighs were covered in stretch marks. The only thing you liked about your body right now was your breasts, which looked pretty good after months of breastfeeding. You turned away from the mirror and grabbed the jersey hanging in your closest with the large 29 on the back and your shared last name. Pulling it over your naked body, you giggled as you imagined the look on your husband’s face when he saw you in nothing but his jersey. Arranging yourself on the bed in the sexiest position you could, and waited.

“Hey baby, dishes are done, do you wanna watch a movie or-” Vince’s words were caught in his throat as he stepped into the room eyes widening as he took in your form.

“I think I have an idea of what I want to do tonight,” You said as you sat up beckoning him with your finger. He smirked, pulling his shirt over his head and he dived onto the bed, immediately hovering over you. One hand moved to cup your hip while the other gripped your jaw and smashed his lips against yours. It was heated and passionate, months of want and need passing between the two of you as his tongue pried your lips open and started to explore your mouth.

“Fuck, did you wear this just for me?”

“Of course I did. All for you, daddy,” The pet name, that had taken on a whole new meaning after you’d given birth, sent a fire through him and you could see the hunger burning in his eyes. He smirked down at you, hand trailing down from your jaw to wrap around your throat.

“Are you gonna be a good girl for daddy?”

You could feel his hard-on pressing against you and the pressure around your neck sent pleasure straight down to your core. You could only whimper, which wasn’t adequate enough for your husband. He squeezed tighter and bit your ear lobe.

“Use your words, baby girl,” He whispered in your ear.

“Yes, daddy, I’ll be a good girl for you.”

That was enough for him, as he released your throat and started to kiss down your body, leaving marks on your neck and collar bone. He pushed the jersey up to expose your stomach, but you instinctively tried to push it down.

“Baby, let me see you. You’re fucking beautiful, don’t cover yourself up,”

“But I’m all…soft.”

The lust faded from his eyes for a moment as he looked up at you, love replacing the heat.

“It doesn’t matter how soft you are. You are so fucking beautiful to me,” He pushed the jersey up again and placed a feather-light kiss on to the skin just beneath your breasts.

“You are the mother of my child, my loving wife, my best friend, and the most stunning and sexiest woman I have ever known. Nothing will ever change that.”

You felt tears gather at the corner of your eyes. Cupping his cheeks, you pull him back up to meet your lips. There’s more passion and love than sexual tension this time and you hold him close to you. He broke away, peppering kisses down your cheeks and neck and back to your stomach, all the way down to your exposed cunt.

“Daddy’s gonna make you feel so good. You’ll know how beautiful you are. I promise.”

His lips wrapped around your clit and sucked, eliciting a sweet moan from your lips. You reached down to tangle your fingers into his curls and press him closer to your pussy. His strong arms wrapped around you, one around your thigh the other pressing down on your hips. He moved his tongue down to lick at your entrance, flicking in and out of your folds while his thumb started to circle your clit. His lips and tongue always worked wonders on you. Even in the past months when sexy times were limited, he never failed to go down on you and make you cum all over his face. Tonight was no different, but now he had time.

You came several minutes later, but he refused to let up. His tongue and fingers to work you until you came again with a shout of his name. He sat up, wiping your juices from his chin and smirking down at you.

“What did you call me, baby?”

You could barely speak, still coming down from both your highs.

“V-Vince…” He leaned down, grasping your throat.

“Uh, uh, baby girl. Try again.”

“Daddy.”

He kissed you, forcing you to taste yourself as he pushed his tongue into your mouth.

“Need a reminder that I’m daddy? Fuck, maybe I need to put another baby in you so you don’t forget.”

He flipped you over onto your stomach, quickly removing his pants before planting a hard slap on your ass.

“Want me to fuck a baby into you? You looked so beautiful pregnant with my child. You’re such a good mom, fuck. I would have fifty more babies with you.”

Vince gripped your hair and lifted your head up, holding you there while he lined himself up with your entrance.

“What do you say, baby girl? Want daddy to fuck you good and fill you up with my cum?”

“Fuck yes, daddy, please!”

“Look at you with my name on your back. You’re all mine, baby girl,” He whispered into your ear, chest pressed against your back as he slipped into you. You both moaned in synch as he stretched you out slowly. You knew he wanted to take his time with you, after months of quickies. He was going to savor your pussy and the way you clenched around him.

He pulled all the way out before pushing back in just as slow as before. He let go of your hair, letting you bury your face into the mattress as you moaned out. His fingers were surely going to bruise your hips, his grip tight as he continued to thrust into you agonizingly slow.

“Daddy, please,” You whimpered.

“What do you need, baby girl?”

“Harder…faster. Please just fuck me.”

He froze, buried in you to the hilt. You whimpered, bucking your hips back, trying to get any sort of friction. It was the wrong idea, as he slapped you hard before gripping the back of your neck and pushing further down into the mattress.

“I’m in control, baby, and I’ll fuck you how I want to fuck you.”

You turned your head, letting your cheek rub against the soft sheets.

“Don’t you want to fuck me, daddy? Fill me up with your cum and knock me up. Don’t you want to cum in me, daddy?”  

He growled, pulling all the way out and slamming back in, making you shout out. He was relentless as he fucked you now, hitting deep inside you with every thrust, hands gripping your hip and neck and pushing you down as he fucked you.

“Fuck that pussy is so good. You’re taking daddy’s dick so well.”

All you could do was mewl and moan, gripping the sheets as you tried to ground yourself as he fucked the thoughts from your mind. All you could think of was Vince, his dick inside you, his hands on you, the grunts and praises falling from his mouth. You wanted nothing more than for him to cum in you and get you pregnant again. You wanted everything with him, to continue the life you had together, and let him fuck you like this for the rest of time.

He pulled you up by your hair before gripping your neck, pressing your back against him as he railed into you. He bit your neck, making you scream for daddy. His fingers moved to circle your clit and if he wasn’t holding you up, you knew you would have collapsed right there. Soon you were cumming hard, stars flashing behind your eyes.

Vince followed you soon after, pushing you back down onto the bed as he gave a few more hard, deep thrusts before spilling himself deep inside of you. You could feel him panting above your back, a drop of sweat dripping from his brow and onto your heated skin. He fell onto his side, pulling you back against him while keeping his dick inside you. He pressed several sweet kisses to your neck and shoulders, hand moving under the jersey to span across your belly.

“I can’t wait to have another one, baby. Seriously, I would have ten kids with you.”

You giggled turning your head to give him a kiss.

“I love you, Vince. I love having a family with you. I would have twenty kids with you.”

“Oh, you’re trying to one-up me now. Baby, I will knock you up every year until you can’t anymore. And I love you too.”

He started to slowly thrust into you again, fingers moving up to play with your nipples.

“I think we need to keep going, you know, just to make sure we take every opportunity to knock you the fuck up.”

“That sounds like a wonderful idea.”

tagging: @sortagaysortahigh @shelbsays @stfukie @starkeyseguin @dmonchld @bricksatanakinswindow @anxietyandtacos @teenagekook