#enhypen sm au

[acphengene]

Tunes

₊ ⁺ pairing: Sunghoon x reader

₊ ⁺ word count: 4k

₊ ⁺ genre: soulmate au, fluff, angst, depression, ilness, surger

₊ ⁺ songs: Adore you by Miley Cyrus - Vacancy by Chris Harper

₊ ⁺ note: i can’t belive it’s finished! cant belive this is it. i will however make small follow up stories. if you wanna be added to my general taglist please let me know

₊ ⁺ Jake ₊ ⁺ Jungwon ₊ ⁺ Jay ₊ ⁺ Sunoo ₊ ⁺ Heeseung ₊ ⁺ Niki ₊ ⁺ Sunghoon ₊ ⁺ Masterlist

Sunghoon did unlike his brothers walk through the world without constantly looking over his shoulder for his other half.

He didn’t mind it, at least that had been the case for the last few years. However, accepting it hadn’t always been easy.

When he turned 13 his heart had broken when nothing showed up on his body. His parents had then calmed him down and told him that in some cases it just took a while for them to manifest, and some even had marks that you couldn’t see.

But days turned into weeks, and weeks into months and after 3 years he had completely given up. He had no idea what had happened to you, but he grieved the loss of you.

He had wondered for days on end on just how you might’ve ended up leaving this world before the two of you met. It had hurt his heart so much he at points in his life had grown depressed by the thoughts.

At other times he had wondered just what a terrible human being he had to be to not be granted a soulmate. And when he sobbed in his brother's shoulders once a year on his birthday, they did their best to reassure him that he indeed deserved his own half just like they did.

He had never told them why the date always broke his heart, but he was in constant hope that maybe this would be the year where his mark would manifest, that it was not that he didn’t have a soulmate, the mark had just been delayed.

One thing everyone always admired about him was that he never grew cold. He could be a little distant from time to time, as if he was in another world, but he was never cold. Not with his brothers, his family and not with engenes.

“Ugh I’m gonna need it to be June real fucking fast” Niki said as he threw himself on the couch.

Jay was currently cooking dinner as Jake and Heeseung was playing whatever game they were obsessed with this week.

“Missing her so soon?” Sunoo said with a smirk as he raised his brows in a suggestive manner.

“Disgusting” Jungwon said, with a smile.

“Obviously! You all would to if you weren’t so lucky they were all able to relocate” he was fidgeting with the cover of his phone as he for the fourth time checked the clock on it. Niki’s soulmate would be up soon which meant morning or nightly FaceTimes with a very much in love maknae. Depending on whichever time zone he was in on that giving day.

Sunghoon was happy for them all, happy that none of them was left without, that they had someone genuinely loving them. Jealous? Of course, but he had gotten used to controlling it whenever they were around.

The dorm had the last year and a half been a battle ground, and luckily their managers had finally decided that giving the guys more space was now a must. Especially since most of the girls were living in the dorms, part and full time.

They were all a lot of fun, and he liked having them all around. They were often more a distraction than a reminder of what he lacked. And they had all become sisters to him. Always supportive and uplifting.

You had the best life, one with song and laughter. One with whispers and yells after your younger brothers. One filled with joy and only occasional sadness.

That was until you turned 12 and everything turned upside down over night. You had awoken one night, with trouble breathing, panicking as you fumbled in the dark room for help.

It had finally come as you knocked over your bedside table. Your father had been there in a second, and before you knew it you were in a hospital gown with an oxygen mask on your face.

A node was what had caused all the trouble, a node on your vocal cords. One they would have to remove. You to this day still remembered laying in the room with no voice as your father yelled at the doctor to fix it, to give you back your laugh, suddenly desperate to hear it one last time.

But they couldn’t, it had cause paralysis and sure it was fixable, but risky. So your parents had made the decision of letting you go mute instead of the possibility of letting you die.

Luckily for you, you were stubborn. You learned asl in a desperate need to communicate with your siblings as fast as possible. However you hadn’t thought about their need to learn it to be able to understand you.

When you turned 13 you still remember being frightened. What if your other half wouldn’t understand? What if he would find you wierd and reject you?

Your mother had done her best in explaining that anyone would be a fool to miss out on you, but you saw the worry in her eyes, and you knew you were right to have that fear.

No marks came, no tingeling on your skin to indicate a touch mark. Nothing.

Until one night, when you heard him. He was singing, with a voice so soft and gentle, a song in a language you couldn’t understand.

And you wept, you cried and you tried to scream. Because what kind of universe would grant you a gift so beautiful, when you were unable to use it?

It was hard figuring out just what language it was he spoke when you couldn’t repeat the words, especially when they were so difficult to articulate in your own alphabet.

But in the end you got the hang of it, and suddenly Korean was the next language for you to master. And you were good, but then again, you knew you had an added advantage of not needing to use the pronunciation, because as far as you remembered, Spanish had been hard enough.

You knew it was worth it though. Understanding the little hums of words he would sing in the evenings, the songs he would scream when he hung out with his friends, or when he mimicked a bird?

You didn’t know what that one was about, and the silent laugh you let out were all you could respond with whenever he did.

The years went by and everything you learned through his love of song made you love him even more. It was as if he was the voice of both of you.

You loved him. You loved him so much and you often wondered if it wasn’t for him if you would’ve lost your mind in this soundless world without him.

He was amazing, and you thanked the universe every day for granting you a soulmate as kind and loving as he was. Of course you felt sorry for him, he had after all no idea you existed.

Where your life had a constant backtrack of song and hums and melodies, his was silent.

You had gotten used to a life without a voice, so much that you yourself didn’t really think about getting it back. This was after all your life now.

A cover. He had been tasked to sing a cover of a song. Well not only him but all of them.

Unfortunately they themselves had been given the task of choosing them. Which meant the dorm was now filled with songs of love and longing.

But what was it that he wanted to tell their fans, what was it that he wanted to tell the world with this song choice?

He left the dorm and went for a walk in the dark night. Headphones in, just walking through the city, and there underneath the stars a song came to him.

You woke up in the early mornings by his voice. And you smiled as you kept laying in bed, letting him wake you up with a song.

What are you trying to say? I’m not sure I understand

He sounded sad. Broken almost. You sat up in bed and hugged the pillows close to your body. Preparing yourself for what seemed could be a heartbreak. He almost never sang in English.

I try my best to be here But I’m victim to the moment When it grabs my feet And turns me upside down

There’s a vacancy Where my heart should be Can’t explain the feeling cause there’s none

All I need is for you to be patient, please You only need to give the faintest touch

Where does my mind go Something you always ask The place I never find

In and out of conversations Lose the sense of my location Feeding into my frustration

There’s a vacancy Where my heart should be Can’t explain the feeling cause there’s none

All I need is for you to be patient, please You only need to give the faintest touch

You grabbed your phone and searched for the lyrics. It was by a small artist. One you didn’t know. And as you read it, you realized he had changed the word mind to heart in the chorus.

He had a hole in his heart. And it was all because of you, he was losing hope. And why wouldn’t he? There was no indication that you were out there, looking for him. Trying to figure out who he was.

Something had to change.

There’s a vacancy Where my heart should be Can’t explain the feeling cause there’s none

He couldn’t explain it, but it felt like something had shifted. As if the world had changed overnight.

Sunghoon had always been positive, or at least he had tried to be. But now it was as if he had gotten a boost. He didn’t know how though.

After a week or so he had seeked out Namjoon, desperate to know if this could be because he had a feelings mark just like him.

Unfortunately the sudden boost in confidence didn’t come with a silk layer that wrapped his whole body so that couldn’t be it.

But whatever it was, whatever this meant, he knew it had to be something related to his mark. So he had a bounce in his step that he hadn’t had before.

Today was the day. The oldest of your little brothers were holding your hand, stroking it as he signed: “you don’t have to do this” 

You smiled at him. “Yes I do” 

He ran a hand through his hair. “You better come through, I can’t lose you” 

You looked at the younger ones and laughed quietly. “Don’t worry, I won’t leave you alone with them” 

He hugged you tightly before letting the rest of your family come to see you off. 

There was no way in hell you were gonna die today, but hopefully you’d come out the other side of this with your voice. 

As you finally woke from what felt like the deepest sleep you had ever had, your brother's hand was once again in yours. 

You smiled slightly. “Hi” you said, and it hurt and your voice was hoarse, but there was a sound. 

He laughed as the tears streamed down his face. “Hi you” he answered. 

Your oldest brother was only two years younger. But the rest had been small children when you lost your voice. Apart from your parents he was the only one who actually remembered it. He dried his eyes. 

“You better start. They’re out getting food so you have a few minutes” he pulled out his phone, ready to take a video of it all. As a memory, and as proof.

They were going through a new choreo, all a little hyped, all having a little too much fun. 

There was no music, just Niki going through the steps with them all. 

And out of the blue, he heard it. A horse voice, with a hint of a melody. 

A hum. 

Baby. 

He froze, and his eyes glazed over. 

Baby yeah, are you listening? 

He stepped back in complete shock, and his hands flew up to cover his mouth and that scream that threatened to be unleashed upon the world. 

Wondering, where you’ve been, all my life?  I just started living.  Oh, baby? Are you listening? 

He could hear the strain, he could hear how you pushed your vocal cords to get the words out, how you forced them to make a sound they hadn’t made for what felt like years. 

When you say you love me  Know I love you more  When you say you need me  Know I need you more  Boy, I adore you. 

The song fizzled out, as if you had lost the strength to keep going. But it didn’t matter. Because you were there, you weren’t a figment of his imagination. You were actually there. 

Sunghoon fell to his knees as the tears streamed, the rest of the guys had been over him the second he started acting differently than the second before. 

He had seen their worries glanced at one another, but he had focused on you and you alone. 

“She’s there, god she’s actually there” he said between his sobs as he desperately tried to dry his eyes. 

And with those words hell broke loose. There was laughter and hugs and screams and questions upon questions all asked at once. It was absolute chaos. But he didn’t mind, he didn’t care. Because he had a soulmate, and you had been there from the start

Your doctor had yelled at you for straining your voice so soon, for endangering the whole procedure for something so reckless as singing half a song. 

But why would you care, how could you care about anything other than him since he had finished said song a few minutes after you had been forced to stop. 

He was a much better singer than you that was certain. Well in the end you wouldn’t know before you had recovered. 

You smiled a little. Happy that he knew you were out here, but also a little sad that he wasn’t by your side. 

Now it was his turn, now he just had to find you. After all, you were in Seoul. 

All seven of them were told to leave, none of them were even remotely calm enough to get any work done. So they had taken two cars back to the dorm. They were so excited to tell the girls. 

The grin on his face hadn’t dropped at any point, and he kept humming little tunes. He had done a quick google search and there was no doubt, singing was your mark. 

Jake kept hovering over him, observing. “I’m fine Jake, okay? More than fine” Sunghoon said for the fourth time as the two of them waited on an elevator to take them to their floor. The rest had ran off as soon as the car door opened. 

Jake nodded. “I know man, but it’s good to see you like this. It looks like a burden have been lifted from your shoulders. 

He shrugged as a response and said: “It kind of has” 

“I’m happy for you” Jake said as he pulled him in for a hug. He felt him relax in his embrace as he released a deep breath. 

“Now let me go or I’m gonna start crying again” Jake laughed. 

As they stepped off the elevator they were met with Lil, Sunoo’s soulmate. 

“She’s here, she’s in Seoul” she said with a determined look, despite the large curious eyes that stared at him. 

“What?” Sunghoon said and his smile dropped. “How do you know?” he asked, as he put a hand on the elevator door, prohibiting it from closing. He was leaving as soon as he knew where you were. 

Lil gave him his phone, and right there laid a girl in a hospital bed. You were curled up in the white covers, chapped lips and a bandage on your neck. 

He felt his blood freeze to ice. What had happened to you. Lil only gestured to the phone with a look, and he turned on the sound. 

Right there was that broken voice he had heard a few hours ago. You were so weak, but you smiled as the tears ran down your cheeks. He saw how much you strained yourself, how much pain you were in just in this last desperate attempt to communicate with him. 

And then he saw you give up, completely drained for energy. You smiled at whoever was holding your camera and signed what the caption told you to be: “and now we wait” 

It took a minute or so, and then your shoulders moved. You were sobbing into your pillow, unable to hold back, he knew what had transpired right then and there. He had answered you, and he knew deep within his heart that what he was seeing was happy tears, but he hated every second that passed because he wasn’t there to comfort you. 

Then the video started again, and as much as he wanted to study your features, he would rather do that face to face. 

“How do I get in contact with her?” He asked desperately. His heart was beating faster than it ever had, he was slowly losing it. 

You needed him, and he needed to be there for you. 

“Hang on, I wrote her brother a message” there was complete silence in the hallway. No one said a word. 

“Hoon” Dovie’s voice cut through the silence and he looked up at her with piercing eyes, as if the sound of her voice would somehow wake him from this dream. 

She smiled softly. “Go take a shower, you stink” 

His cheeks flushed red. As he subtlety smelled himself. She wasn’t wrong. He removed his hands from the door of the elevator as he finally left it. Stepping into the dorm. 

“Well get the flowers” Jungwon said as he grabbed his soulmate's hand, they both rubbed his back as they passed him. 

“I’ll find the clothes” Jay said as he ruffled his hair. 

He was lost for words. 

“I’m on location duty!” Lil said as she threw herself on the couch. 

“Let’s get you cleaned up!” Jake said and pushed him towards the bathroom. 

Sunghoon knew he had never felt more loved than this. But he was about to.

It didn’t take long before your brother had replied to the message Lil had sent his way. Claiming she knew exactly who they were looking for. 

You had asked one simple question. The lyric to one of the songs he kept repeating over and over, but that she couldn’t find on the internet. One from their new comeback. 

Heeseung sent all the lines from every song and they were quickly accepted and the address and room number of the hospital was quickly sent their way. 

You were currently asleep and as per Sunghoon’s request your brother had promised not to wake you, or tell you. He didn’t want to stress you further. 

Jungwon had returned with a giant bouquet of mixed and colorful flowers. It was beautiful and larger than life. “Might as well wow her a little” was all he had said with a wink. 

And now here he was. In a car that was taking him to you. His leg bounced off the ground in pure nerves. He tried his best not to sing a little tune as he usually did when he was nervous, he would hate for him to be the reason you woke up. 

A kind soul showed him to the room, and as your brother looked up from his chair he almost fell off it. 

Sunghoon gave him a small wave. And as polite as he wanted to be he couldn't get his eyes to leave the figure buried under all those blankets. 

Your brother stood up, gesturing towards the chair that stood in front of you, and Sunghoon quickly moved past him. 

He heard the door click and something that sounded like: “did he just step off the set of a kdrama or what is going on?” 

Sunghoon smiled a little at the comment. He was happy he looked good, he wanted to. For you. 

He laid the flowers on the table beside you, and sat down.  

“You do know it’s impolite to stare, right brother?” you signed, not yet aware that the seat was now taken by someone else. 

He chuckled. “Sorry I don’t know ASL” he said in Korean, hopefully you understood him. 

Your eyes shot open and you looked at the beauty in front of you, he had a large smile painted on his lips, showing off those pointed teeth that somehow made him look so incredibly adorable. 

“You’re here” you whispered. You couldn’t help it but you moved back in the bed, and as if you were two magnets he moved closer, capturing your hand in his. 

“Shhh” he said as he intertwined his fingers with yours. “Just breathe” it was easier said than done, for him as well, the mere touch of your skin sent bolts of electricity through his body. 

And then you sobbed for the second time that day, but this time, this time he was here to comfort you. Without even giving it a second thought he removed his jacket and slid into the space you had made in the bed. 

He pulled you into his chest and wrapped his arms around you. Stroking both your hair and your back. 

You smelled amazing, even though he knew the hospital had washed away most of it, there was still an underlying hint of vanilla in your hair that drove him crazy. 

“Just cry little one, I’m right here” 

So you did, you cried and you cried and for the first time in almost a decade it actually made a sound. Not a very charming one, but a sound nonetheless. 

Sunghoon started humming the most calming song he could think of, and felt how your breathing stilled slowly. He smiled to himself and pulled you even closer as he kissed the top of your head. You fit perfectly there in his arms. 

“I’m so so glad you did what you did. But if you ever do anything as reckless again, I’ll absolutely lose it, okay?” 

You laughed as you tried to dry off your tears but without success. “Sorry, I missed you too much and decided I didn’t wanna wait anymore” you looked up at him and he instead dried your eyes for you. 

“As thankful as I am, your safety trumps everything else. Never forget that” he said before kissing your forehead. 

“You got it” you said as you pulled him closer to you. “Your voice is amazing by the way” 

You felt him chuckling beneath you. “I sure hope so” 

Despite him not being able to see it, you raised a brow, and as if he could read your mind he continued. “It is my profession, which also means my very kind members and all their soulmates will be here in approximately 30 minutes with more flowers and a shit load of embarrassing stories. So we better get going” he tried getting up but you pulled him right back. 

“You do know I’m literally being observed, right?” 

He rolled his eyes. “Obviously, but no soulmate of mine is gonna be laying in a rock hard bed with itchy bedding. I got you an upgrade” he shrugged as if it was nothing, and you supposed when you were some type of famous it might actually have been nothing. A single phone call? Would he even have to pay for it? Who knew, but you sure as hell wasn’t gonna turn down the offer. 

“Say that again” you said before pulling him closer to you by the neck. 

“My soulmate” he whispered back and you saw the tears flooding his eyes. They looked like sparkling amber in this light. 

“I’ve missed you so much” he said as he rested his forehead against yours. Your hand laid on his cheek as you caressed it and he prayed with every bone in his body that this wasn’t yet another dream he would wake from soon. 

“And I’ve missed you” you said before kissing his nose. “I love you so much” 

He pulled you closer and finally claimed your lips with his own. He was so soft and tender, as if you were the most precious treasure in the world. And to him that was exactly what you were. 

“I love you more, little one” 

I cant belive it’s finally here 😭 i really hope you’ve all enjoyed this series as much as I have - i dont have words to express my gratitude. But thank you all for following along.

I’m gonna open up if you have any questions about how each of these boys would handle different situations with their soulmates, please send them in an ask and I’ll make a little something out of it if I feel inspired 🫶🏼

Love you all

⁺ taglist: @why4anne @juicygirl4life @azzy02 @bluxjun @why-did-i-just-do-this @elairah @ramyeonzwithspam @floating-moon-dust @skyearby @acourtofmoonlightandstars @garrdenwonie @whateveridontcaresheesh @stormy1408 @tunafishyfishylike @sol3chu @spicxbnny @blvengene @fics-lovebot @fangirl125reader @acopenhagenarmy @tunafishyfishylike @lveegsoi @1-itsneverthatserious-1

[onlyjaeyun]

𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 – 𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄

⤥ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

⤥ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬!𝐀𝐔

← 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 — 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ||

A/N: and with this, the story of CH!HoonY/N ends. 🩵

if you've been with me since the beginning of this sm au, you know exactly just how much I've loved and enjoyed yet also struggled to work on this beautiful piece. It's definitely the one smau which took me the longest, mostly because life got in the way and i kept taking breaks in between but also because the pressure got to me at the end and i will gladly admit that. at the end of the day, i'm just human and i'm a writer, i'm someone who tried to cope using literature snd writing and when things got too much in all aspects of life, i just couldnt pour as much of my heart into this smau as i had initially intended to.

regardless of everything that has happened towards the end, i hope you guys still enjoyed it very much and mostly i hope you all know just how much i love and appreciate you all. the ammount of love, support but also immense patience i've received is something i will forever cherish and keep close to my heart. you guys are the best and i genuinely can't wait to start new journeys with you all by my side.

i will definitely be taking a bit of a longer break from smaus but dont worry! i will be eriting one shots and you guys know me, i can't stfu at all so stay tuned!!! i love you all so so so much. take care xx zadie 🤍

TAGLIST: @soonigiri @en-happiness @lhsvibez @dammit-jjk @heerinnie @primroselover @jungwon-xo @szkstay @lostwonderwall @hoonieluv @certifiedmoa @doodlelibrary @ikeuizm @kpoprhia @sleeping-demons @imtoanonymousforyou @lalalovejay @ineedsomezzz @xrr-s4sha @viagumi @electrobutterfly @mimikittysblog @blurryriki @heelcvr @wonkifangirl @joonzseoulmate @kwiwin @hoondiors @seuomo @zerasari @love-you-twice @aloverga @marz-mars @velvtcherie @niniissus @abrazosolorcereza @ddazed-lhs @acphengene @skz-streamer @kshoshi @tya0 @yizhoutv @jebetwo @myheelody @seokgyuu @blockbusterhee @luvkpopp @heeslut4life

[tofuhoon]

enhypen’s dating habits

genre: fluff warnings: none (i think)

masterlist

heeseung can’t help but keep his hands off of you. it’s not to say he’s always wanting something from you, but he just loves having that assurance that you’re by his side. he realizes this fact again every single morning when you wake up with your body pressed against his. whether it’s having you sat on his lap or fiddling with your hair, he enjoys having your presence in his.

jay’s love language is gift giving. he can’t help that whenever he sees anything beautiful in the slightest, it reminds him of you. he never gets tired of the glowing beam on your face when you receive your gifts. though you tell him to “stop buying me stuff, save your money,” the blush on your cheeks is enough to encourage his spending.

jake loves spending time with you. of course, all the boys do. but the way jake schedules out all his dates on his personalized calendar with pictures of you, decorating those days with hearts and stickers makes you truly know he cares. whether he’s walking layla or finishing up his work, there’s nothing that he wouldn’t rather do with you right next to him.

if there’s one thing about sunghoon, it’s that he’s always looking for you. whether it’s in a sea of people or a small gathering of friends, you are the only one in his viewpoint at all times. he doesn’t mean it to necessarily keep an eye on you, but his body just naturally gravitates to your direction. whenever he cracks a joke or does something cute, his eyes are laser-focused on your reaction only. 

sunoo doesn’t think he can go a day without resting his head on your shoulder. “it’s the perfect pillow!” he says, even when you try to convince him that a neck pillow might be a good investment. he will do this when he’s tired, when he’s having some chill time with you, or when he laughs and allows his body to ragdoll onto yours.

jungwon’s friends are tired of hearing of you. you’re great and all, but is there really nothing else going on in his life? that’s not true of course, but the way your name is stuck to his tongue, his friends are sure they know every detail about you. but jungwon can’t help that the dress in the store looks just like the one you wore on your last date, or that cat over there looks just like you. you’re constantly on his mind, and he doesn’t mind a bit.

niki’s playful side is one you’re very familiar with. still, he tends to shrink it down whenever you come near. it’s not that he thinks you’ll get annoyed (will you? he hopes not.), but that he wants to become someone you can rely on. his gentlemanly nature can be surprising for the others to see after he just threatened to dropkick jake, but your rosy cheeks make it all worth it.

[lovjiwoong]

♡— enhypen!boyfriend calls you clingy — hyung line only

pairing: enhypen hyung line (ot4) x gender neutral reader | genre: angst | warnings: name calling, hurt, curse words

a/n: time to switch up these reactions and give you some good ol' angst. i also will only write for heeseung, jay, jake and sunghoon because that's what i'm comfortable with :)

main masterlist — part two - the break up

permanent taglist: @honeyhuii @soobin-chois @fylithia @enhacolor @ja4hyvn @maiverie @bambisgirl @hiqhkey @its-madi @bobariki @yizhoutv @joonsytip @l33j3n8 @nar-nia @lightprincess-world

networks: @kflixnet

[luvvpsh]

10 things I hate about you

02: jakelations

masterlist | backward | forward

SYNOPSIS ౨ৎ Lee Heeseung has it all, he’s captain of the soccer team, popular, charming and hilarious (at least in his eyes). What he doesn’t have though is a girlfriend OR a prom date making him desperate. You on the other hand want nothing to do with him or his silly problems, but how come you two are always clashing heads in the end?

TAGLIST < open > @eclipse-777 @saursoob @rosas-in-the-garden @enha-stars @rikizm @ramenoil @winuvs @semisemirin1i82 @positivelyinlovewithjungwon @hee-yunie @patchofblue @sincerelyrki @badaswifey @kaispulshies @hae-luvr @aespaslut @llvrhee @grah127 @manooffline @haechology @hajunzi @sunghoonsgff @jaeyunluvr @jentlecoeur @ak-aaa-li @cyberinnie @seiamor @rikimylove @thesassy-mia @hexoolio @eleanorheartschishiya @dimplewonie @autumn583 @jeongintwt @aerohmantics @miumiuestmoi @yoongisbaguetteshoes @isoobie @heeoao @letwiiparkjay @lowjilamoon @letmein2urheart @thatonedemigodfromseoul @scoupsworld @hrts4hees @splat00z | bold can’t be added

[hannie-dul-set]

#𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗙𝗟𝗜𝗖𝗧 𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗢𝗥𝗬. resident slacker turned achiever overnight? what the hell happened!  it all started when the both of you got grouped together for a class presentation— you got your first unsatisfactory grade, and park sunghoon got his ego bruised for the first time. conflict is perpetual in all societal spheres. but when it’s two unhealthily competitive and prideful people gnawing at each other’s throats, conflict becomes all the more entertaining.

PAIRING. park sunghoon x female! reader. GENRE. social media! au, college! au, academic rivals to lovers, romance, humor. WARNINGS. excessive swearing, dirty/inappropriate jokes, kys/kms jokes, both sunghoon and yn need a lot of work on their personalities, obnoxious political science references and jokes (might add more as we go on).

TAGLIST. open! send an ask/dm/reply. STATUS. ongoing.

NOTE. haven't written an sm au in a hot minute but with my classes starting soon, i thought this would be the best way to keep my blog active while i slowly work on my longer fics. witness the unfortunate polsci-fication of the hyung line. hope you enjoy and always remember— engagement keeps this website alive!

profiles.

01 / a motherfucking B. 02 / scathing review. 03 / just war theory. 04/ playing dirty. 05 / nails out n shit. 06 / do you like it when she degrades you. 07 / bothered. 08 / humiliation kink. 09 / mouth duel. 10 / debate. 11 / praise. 12 / summa cum louder. 13 / no fucking way. 14 / homoeroticism in the tags. 15 / stinky hoon. 16 / why did you dare.

. . . more tba!

CONFLICT THEORY. © hannie-dul-set, 2023.

[enha-hype]

maeumi & me - ch 24 : chocolate milk?

a/n : hello hello im back from the dead :3 don't forget to read the written chapter below! a lil recap as to where we were - in the last chapter, everyone came over to jake's place for a sleepover. this one continues from that.

As you go about your business, the rest of the house is dark and quiet, albeit for the boys softly snoring away in the two bedrooms.

“Can't sleep?”

You startle at the voice and whip around to find the source, and find Jungwon leaning against the fridge, squinting against the light. “Jeez, Won. How are you so quiet? You're like a ninja cat.”

“Not the first time I've been told that,” he chuckles, stifling a yawn.

“Shit sorry, I woke you didn't I?”

“Nahh. Been tossing and turning for a while, I can't sleep either,” he shrugs, then looking at Maeumi adds, “he looks like he's ready to pass out, though,”

You laugh. “Yeah. I kinda feel bad but he chooses to follow me around so there's nothing I can do about that.”

“Tell me about it. I can't even count the number of times I've gotten up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and almost tripped over him on my way out. Also, what are you doing?”

“Um, making chocolate milk. You want some?”

He blinks, an amused smile breaking out, and nods. “Sure,” he says, sitting at the kitchen table.

“So. I guess it's been a little stressful managing work as well as the internship, huh?” you ask as you mix the ingredients together.

“A little. But I talked to the cafe manager today and he agreed to reduce my hours so I think it'll be better now.”

“Good. You better take care of your health from now on,”

“I will, if only because I don't want you coming over to give me an ass-whooping, which I strongly suspect you will do,”

“Oh I definitely will, Yang Jungwon.” You turn to give him a stern glare but almost immediately break into a smile. “You know, it's unfair that even bed hair looks attractive on you,” you blurt out before you even register what you're saying. Shit. You did not mean to say that out loud. You clear your throat, eager to change the subject. “Okay, it's almost ready!” you grab two glasses from the cupboard overhead and busy yourself with pouring the chocolate milk into them.

As you pour it into the second glass, you feel Jungwon come up close behind you and hold your breath. He reaches around, and for a second you stupidly think he's going to hug you, but he grabs the salt shaker from the counter, sprinkles a dash of it into both glasses and stirs. You feel heat rushing to your face – partly out of embarrassment and partly because of the proximity. You're not quite touching, your bodies are so close you can feel the warmth of his body behind yours.

“Tastes better this way,” he explains as he steps away. Why did you think he was going to hug you? That was crazy. Did you want him to hug you...? Or something else?

“Great! Let's go sit on the couch, shall we?” You grab both glasses and head to the living room before he can say anything. If he notices your sudden over-enthusiasm which is more or less a desperate attempt to diffuse the sudden awkwardness, he doesn't let on. But that's mostly because he himself is trying not to think too much into to your little compliment from earlier.

The light isn't on in the living room, so you hope he can't see how red your face is, but it's also not so dark that you can't see anything at all, since the light from the kitchen partially illuminates the room.

You hand him a glass, sitting a normal distance away from each other, trying not to think of why how near or far you're sitting from each other should ever matter. You both take a sip.

“Huh. Well what do you know, it does taste better this way!”

“I know!” Jungwon cries out a little too loudly and you shush him, giggling – you're too close to the bedrooms to even be talking at a normal volume, much less louder. “Oops,” he whispers, grinning.

You take another sip and hum in approval. Jungwon looks at you and snickers.

“What?”

He points at your face. “You have a milk-stache,”

You wipe it off with the back of your hand, a little embarassed. “Is it gone?”

“Nope, you missed a spot,” he reaches with his index finger, wipes at the area above the corner of your upper lip and then smears it on the tip of your nose, smirking.

You huff in disbelief. “Oh, you're in trouble now,” you reach for him and he reflexively swats away at you, causing some of your chocolate milk to spill onto the floor.

“Oh, no.” Both your eyes and Jungwon's dart from the splotch of brown liquid to Maeumi to each other. Maeumi starts to make his way over – no doubt to scrutinize and eventually taste it, and you and Jungwon immediately jump into action. You place the glass down on a stool nearby and grab Maeumi while Jungwon looks for tissues or the kitchen towel to soak up the mess. Maeumi squirms and whines in your grip, trying to break free. He barks, once. “Shhh! Shut up Maeumi, you know chocolate's bad for you!!”

“Where the heck is it??!” Jungwon whisper-shouts from the kitchen, opening and closing drawers.

Maeumi wriggles free and by God, those tiny legs are fast! Fortunately, Jungwon returns with a bunch of tissues and just as he rushes in to blot up the milk, you also swoop in to catch Maeumi, and although you are both successful, you also end up headbutting. The two of you exclaim in pain and then double over in bouts of laughter. Maeumi is so puzzled by this sudden chaos that he forgets all about his eager pursuit. You and Jungwon are still in fits, shushing each other and clamping your hands over your mouths lest you wake the others. When you finally compose yourselves and the muffled giggles give way to silence, you find your eyes darting to Jungwon's lips....they look so soft even in the dim light, and you wonder what it would feel like to kiss them. It's a ridiculous thought but it feels so natural you don't even question it at first and lean in almost involuntarily. To your surprise, you find him doing the same. Your heartbeat quickens as you briefly meet his eyes - is this really happening? Before you can give any more thought to it however, the light comes on. You jerk back and whip around to find Heeseung standing in the doorway, one hand on the switchboard and the other one shielding his eyes from the sudden brightness. There's a beat of silence as you all stare at each other.

“What is going on?” his voice is thick with sleep.

“Chocolate milk?” Jungwon offers with a sheepish grin, and that's enough to send you into a laughing fit all over again.

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[scented-morker]

Maneater Outfit

masterlist | next

a/n: hiiii bbs happy sunoo day, here’s an update bc I miss this au… hopefully I’ll start updating regularly again

[flytomyseoul]

TO BE BLUNT… | SJY smau

MASTERLIST

paring: college student! jake x casual stoner student! reader (feat. enha members + various other idols!)

synopsis: Heeseung finds a new smoking buddy and Jake takes a liking to her. In order to impress her, he finds a common interest which happened to be smoking. But the problem is that Jake has never smoked weed in his life, but hey there’s a first time for everything.

genre: crack, s2l, slow burn ish

will see when I update, depending on my schedule it should be daily or every other day.

warnings: mentions of drug use (weed!! weed!!), profanity, no underage use of weed in this, this is for my stoner girlies

THIS IS MY FIRST SMAU, IT WILL BE MESSY AND FILLED WITH ERRORS

CHAPTERS…

1. i can be that

2. i go bathroom

...

[puma-riki]

No One Noticed....

Warnings: consistent cursing, kms/kys jokes [Subject to change every chapter]

Status: Ongoing (Start: 092124)

Taglist: @bee-the-loser @iaintseggsy @channieismylove @yangjungwonnie @luluvhs @nikiswifiee @kingofthekards @skepvids @sammie217 @sh0dor1 @sirens-dreams @starfallia @polarisjisung @minhosimthings @mochiwonz @jiiyen @strawberrieswithchocolateo3o @ritzy-dream-boy @roseangelxfuma @sugarikiz @stvrriki @eczlipse @ddolleri @dangerousgardenchild @roarr-ki | Comment on any chapter from No One Noticed... saying you want to be added to the taglist!! or send me an ask !! | bold could not be tagged :c

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14. I WANT MY DUO

[lyongitodo]

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐲 - 𝐞𝐦𝐦𝐚 𝐤𝐢𝐦

Sinopsis:

Emma Kim, mejor conocida como la "princesa de SM", es la idol y actriz que todos admiran, pero pocos realmente conocen. Con una carrera brillante como solista, actriz y referente de estilo, su vida parece perfecta desde fuera. Sin embargo, detrás de los escenarios y las luces, Emma lucha por mantener el equilibrio entre su carrera, las amistades, los amores complicados y los desafíos inesperados que vienen con ser una de las estrellas más grandes de su generación.

ETIQUETAS: kpop idol AU, romance, drama, amistad ESTADO: en curso

Perfil

información básica

información personal

carrera

0. Capitulos

planes cancelados

guiones y mas guiones

rookie

sweet revenge

orgullosa de ti

amor no correspondido

in my dreams

y más..

Carrera

Dramas & Peliculas

Música

Weekend - Debut

Can´t stop this party

INVU

Low Life

X

Hate Loving

sweet

pretty & broken

2. Redes Sociales

Instagram

X

MMA 2023

Light Tour

Light Tour pt.2

Dating Rumor

Youtube Compilations

Youtube

Lee Mujin Service

3. Awards

MMA 2022

MMA 2023

[acphengene]

the soul ties series

₊ ⁺ a series where you follow each of the members of enhypen and their search for their significant other.

₊ ⁺ Jake ₊ ⁺ Jungwon ₊ ⁺ Jay ₊ ⁺ Sunoo ₊ ⁺ Heeseung ₊ ⁺ Niki ₊ ⁺ Sunghoon ₊ ⁺

the soul ties boys - headcanons

₊ ⁺ asks answered about the soul ties boys and headcanons i just feel like sharing about them

₊ ⁺ Who they’d introduce you to first

₊ ⁺ Their kinks

the kingdoms series

₊ ⁺ A series of the Kingdoms in a continent far, far away - a series about their heirs, it’s dramas and it’s love

₊ ⁺ The Night₊ ⁺ The Autumn ₊ ⁺ The Winter₊ ⁺ The Fire ₊ ⁺

dream a little dream

₊ ⁺ a short little story of how you reconnect with an old flame which heart you broke. will history repeat itself?

angel

₊ ⁺ all he feel is your pain, all he can do is hope it will one day lead you to him.

₊ ⁺ a part of the soul ties series

golden hour

₊ ⁺ he sees you in his dreams and spend every waking moment looking for you

₊ ⁺ a part of the soul ties series

the night

₊ ⁺ will you be able to walk in your brothers previously made footsteps as a new heir, or will you give up everything for love?

₊ ⁺ a part of the kingdom series

₊ ⁺ introduction ₊ ⁺

darling (discontinued)

₊ ⁺ rule number one of the bro code; don’t fall for your best friends sister

₊ ⁺ 27 chapters of pure love and angst - the story that inspired the kingdoms series

little dove

₊ ⁺ how do one find one’s soulmate when all you have to go on is a sentence?

₊ ⁺ a part of the soul ties series

tunes

₊ ⁺ how do you find your soulmate when you’ve never had a mark?

₊ ⁺ a part of the soul ties series

gone

₊ ⁺ everyone knew Sunghoon didn’t have a mark, but how come?

₊ ⁺ a part of the soul ties series - an alternative ending

lilac longing

₊ ⁺ all he sees is hues of the emotions you feel, luckily for him you were easy to find

₊ ⁺ a part of the soul ties series

sweets

₊ ⁺ you love sweets and he loves chocolate - so why do you keep eating lemons?

₊ ⁺ a part of the soul ties series

sting of fate

₊ ⁺ some times all it takes is a little pull to get everything up and running - or is it push?

₊ ⁺ a part of the soul ties series

[onlyjaeyun]

𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 – 𝟒𝟒

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑: 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞

⤥ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

⤥ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬!𝐀𝐔

⤥ 𝐰𝐜: 𝟔.𝟖𝐤

⤥ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐀 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞, 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬. 𝐀 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐧 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲'𝐬 𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐤.

“No fucking way!”

The exclamation of excitement reaches your ears before your brain can process the feeling of Jungwon’s weight basically falling onto your body as he wraps his arms around your shoulders and starts laughing in response to his birthday gift.

All you can do is join in on his laughter, tightening the hug and embracing the comfort it comes with.

“Thank you so fucking much”, Jungwon says and pulls away, the plane tickets firmly in his hands as he looks at you with big, excited eyes and his cheeks covered in the sweetest shade of pink.

“Don’t expect anything like this for the next five years, though”, you joke and embrace your adopted sibling into another tight hug, making sure to keep your eyes closed because the mere thought of meeting Sunghoon’s gaze makes your heartbeat double its pace.

There’s been this very significant yet subtle shift in the way he’s looking at you and although the two of you have been spending quite a bit of time around each other, you have yet to get used to it all. However, you’re in no way complaining about it because for the first time in almost a decade, you don’t feel this specific heaviness weighing on your chest whenever he’s around.

The past few weeks have definitely not been easy for you. No matter how healing and relieving the conversation with your brother about your past life choices was, you have yet to find the courage to face the one person you’ve been avoiding as much as possible lately, only for life to challenge you with his constant presence around you.

You still feel as attracted to Sunghoon as you did before the friendsmas dinner almost two months ago, maybe even more now that you’ve finally accepted the fact that you want him in many more ways than just sexually.

It definitely wasn’t easy for you to admit this to yourself and took you about three different and very lengthy conversations with your closest people but the longer you’ve thought about it, the more you’ve realized that there’s not really a point in denying your feelings any longer.

You want Park Sunghoon.

In the deepest bits of your heart you know no guy who’s entered and left your life has ever managed to even come close to him, but these are thoughts you’ve been a little more hesitant to explore. The thought of him becoming the one in your heart after years of hating him scares you, so much you’ve only ever said it out loud once to yourself in the darkness of your room after crying for hours over all the time you both won’t ever get back.

Park Sunghoon was the first boy to break your heart, yet even after all these years you’ve remained deeply in love with him. Some people might question your sanity, your mental and emotional wellbeing as well as your rational thinking, but to you it’s him. It’s always been him.

You have yet to figure out why exactly, but one thing you’ve always been subconsciously aware of is that your deep, vile hatred has always had its root in the pure, innocent love you’ve been carrying in your heart ever since he entered your life all those years ago.

There’s just something so special about him, which might be the reason why his lack of communication, his betrayal and the way he’s been treating you all these years hurts as much as it does.

You know there’s no point in wondering, guessing and imagining things when all you have to do is just talk to him, something all of your mutual friends have been very adamant about for the past few weeks (probably even years if you’re being fully honest to yourself).

But how come the only right way to finally receive all the answers and explanations to the question marks in your mind feels like the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do in your life? Why is it this scary?

Maybe it’s because you’ve never felt this strongly about all the other men in your life, not even the ones you had convinced yourself to be in love with and maybe it’s because the possibility of things not working out in the end has already broken your poor heart into thousands of pieces.

Every time your eyes find their way to the ring on your finger, one of the most meaningful and sentimental gifts you’ve ever received, you remember that after everything, Sunghoon knows a part of you which you’ve been keeping locked away and protected for way too long. To him, you’re not just a friend, you never have been. To him, you’re you. You’re an individual, your own person. In moments where the whole world was expecting something from you, to be a certain way or do and say certain things, Sunghoon was the one to just sit back and watch, cheer you on from the sidelines because his trust in you was endless. He always knew you’d find your way through it all.

When you first started to have thoughts like these, it felt wrong because you thought you’d discredit your friends and their places in your life, their undying support and love, only to realize that of everyone you’ve ever known, Sunghoon was the first one to believe in you.

He was there when Riki was too young to even understand what was going on, he was there when you had nobody. He was the first one to stay.

The more your eyes meet, the deeper the desire to just be close to him, feel his touch on your skin and lose yourself in the comfort it comes with, runs and you can’t help but allow yourself to catch a tiny glimpse of him from the corner of your eye.

“Stop staring, you’re being so obvious”, Jaeyun suddenly whispers into your ear, the sheer shock of hearing his usually so soothing voice in the midst of your daydreams is enough to pull you back into reality, “he’s not being subtle either, I can’t believe y’all had us fooled for so long. No wonder you guys got to fuck next door, I would have never noticed if I was drunk right now.”

With your eyes widened in absolute disbelief you slowly turn your head to the side to look at your best friend only to realize just how close he is.

“That’s a little too close”, Jaeyun jokes smiles charmingly, knowing that there’s one person in the room whose sole attention has been on you for the past five hours, “I really really don’t want him to beat me up again so, meet me in the kitchen.”

“Again? What does that mean? Jaeyun, where are you–”, but you don’t get to finish your whisper shouted questions as he casually jumps onto his feet and suddenly disappears in the hallway, leaving you no choice but to do as you’re told.

With everyone’s focus remaining on each other, except for Sunghoon’s (of course), you slowly get up and make your way to the kitchen, your heart brutally hammering against your chest as you try to think of possible scenarios for the upcoming few minutes.

As soon as you close the door behind you, Jake’s lips stretch into a big smile, his eyes turning into little half moons as the excitement becomes evident in every single one of his facial muscles.

“What–”, “For the love of whatever or whoever you believe in, please just talk to him”, your best friend is quick to throw the reason for his request into your face and all you can do is look at him with raised brows and widened eyes.

“Don’t you dare look ag me like I’m the crazy one when you two have been eyefucking each other for hours and I had to witness it all because I promised not to drink and it’s actually awful”, Jaeyun rambles, his usually so relaxed expressions are drenched in confusion, his whole body language lets you know just how much this has been weighing on him and if it wasn’t for the things he just said, you would have actually felt bad for him.

It takes you a few moments to process everything he just dropped onto you, but as soon as your brain has managed to catch up, you can’t stop the huge mixture of emotions from hitting you in all the right places.

“Jaeyun, I don’t know if I’m ready”, you whisper and feel the tears announcing their arrival as they burn in between your eyes.

“That’s what you think”, Jake sighs and rolls his eyes, behavior you’re actually not used to receiving from your usually so soft spoken best friend, “you’re more than just ready for this, my dearest friend. You’ve actually been waiting for this conversation for over nine years. Please, stop running away from this, from him.”

Usually Sim Jaeyun leaves you speechless with the rather out of pocket things he tends to say in the most inappropriate moments, yet this time he’s managed to leave you absolutely shocked with his honesty.

You don’t know what to say, nor do you have any idea how to react or what to do, but in the deepest pits of your gut you feel genuinely relieved to hear your hidden wishes to be confirmed.

Knowing that Sunghoon’s behavior towards you isn’t just a fabrication of your wishful thinking has taken a huge weight off of your shoulders and for the first time in weeks, the fog in your head clears up and you allow yourself to push all those doubts, worries and worst case scenarios into the darkest corner of your mind and focus on what your heart actually wants.

“Okay”, you whisper and take a deep breath, “you’re fucking right.”

“Fuck yeah, I am! Let’s fucking go!”

Jaeyun is quick to burst into loud cheers and words of enthusiasm in response to your agreement and with a soft sigh you wrap your arms around his neck and quietly thank him for his support.

You’re very well aware that the past two months have been quite difficult for your best friends too, especially the boys. Navigating your as well as Sunghoon’s emotional state couldn’t have been easy for three of the biggest empaths you know and knowing that they’ve spent all this time looking for solutions and the right ways to approach these sorts of things is something you feel incredibly grateful for.

“I’m gonna send him to our place now”, Jake explains once you get yourself to let go of him, “give me fifteen minutes to distract these fuckers, send the love birds to Seung’s place and give you guys all the space and time you need..and deserve.”

With those words your best friend quickly rushes out of the kitchen, leaving you behind with nothing but hope and excitement in your chest.

“Hoo–”, “Stop yelling, I’m here”, Sunghoon quickly interrupts his best friend as he randomly appears on the other side of the hallway, not brave and shameless enough to eavesdrop, yet anxious enough to wait in close proximity.

“Batshit”, is the only thing Jake responds with as the shock of Hoon’s sudden presence sends shivers down his spine.

“What did she say? She hates me, doesn't she? She never wants to spend another day talking to me or even in my presence, does she? Tell me the fucking truth, Jaeyun”, Sunghoon nervously rambles and subconsciously wraps his hand around his friend’s arm, pulling him closer as the feeling of his lungs hyperventilating becomes too overwhelming.

The past two months have been something close to hell.

When Sunoo reminded him of Jungwon’s birthday a few days earlier, Sunghoon was shocked since he’s been mentally stuck on mid December, his brain constantly replaying the events of the friendsmas dinner to make sure he doesn’t actually forget about it.

Of course he’s spent most nights talking to his best friends to figure something out, yet even after all this time he has no actual plan on what to say, do or even think.

He’s already accepted the fact that he’s never actually stopped loving you. The realisation that behind his deep hatred for you was simply because of how much he’s loved you all this time was one of the hardest pills he’s ever had to swallow. Almost a decade of genuine denial later he’s found himself in a headspace he has never, ever experienced before and if it wasn’t for the boys trying their very best to keep him distracted, he would have lost his mind already.

Most of his days were spent at the gym and work, places he knew he wasn’t going to be in agonizing pain because of your presence and yet he’s always caught himself looking forward to practice day because it meant he’d finally get to be close to you again, even if you guys never talked about anything but the most necessary things.

Maybe it’s because of how ashamed he is for all the things he’s done and said to you in the past and maybe it’s because his heart actually can’t handle the constant pain pumping through his veins whenever he’s near you.

Never in his life has he wanted anyone as bad as you

At first, Sunghoon was convinced it’s because you’ve all he’s ever known but the more time passed, the more he realized that it’s because you’re his person.

He’s already accepted the possibility of not being yours and he knows he could never be angry with you if that was the case.

Sunghoon’s just…tired. Mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted of the constant pretending, the hate and anger, all the pent up frustration and not knowing where he stands with you. You guys used to be best friends only for life and that god awful human being of a stepmother to tear you apart and turn you into actual enemies.

The mere thought of what might have been if he had only received that letter and never had to force himself to hate you makes his heart ache.

All these years could have been spent making life decisions together, being there for the other when they needed it the most and all those hurtful words could have been avoided.

But Sunghoon has no choice but to accept that this is how things went and there’s absolutely no way to undo and unsay everything and if it wasn’t for his acceptance of the whole situation, he would have spent even more nights laying awake wondering why life had to make him go through all of this.

Why life had to make you go through all of this.

If there’s one thing Sunghoon’s gonna struggle the most to accept, it’s the fact that he didn’t get to be by your side to comfort and hold you during your darkest times. All the times where Riki knocked on his door to cry himself to sleep in his arms because he didn’t want to burden you were the times where Sunghoon was silently praying that one of the boys had thought of you as the mental image of you going through all of that pain by yourself was enough to torture him mercilessly.

You’re strong; stronger than anyone he’s ever met. You always find a way to survive and make the best of everything life throws your way, that’s just how you are. that’s how you’ve programmed yourself to be. No matter what or who, you always know what to do, say and how to make everyone happy, even if it means sacrificing your own happiness for it.

Nobody has ever loved him the way you do simply because there’s nobody who loves as deeply, as genuinely and purely as you do. It definitely took him a while to understand this, but after watching the way everyone in your closest circle treats you Sunghoon has realised that they simply mirror your behavior towards them and it was that moment where he started genuinely missing you. Not just the way you used to love and care for him, but you as a person.

Your energy, so calm and comforting, something he’s never experienced with anyone before.

Maybe that’s why he’s so scared of losing you – again. It’s not like he’s actually got you back in his life yet but the mere thought of you avoiding him at all cost once you all graduate and live your new lives as adults makes his whole body go into panic mode.

He’d rather be close to you from this distance than risk it, but he knows he has to talk to you about all of this.

Sunghoon knows he owes you this, not only your current self but that twelve year old girl who cried herself to sleep because she didn’t understand why her best friend suddenly turned his back on her after she’s just given up her biggest dream.

And first and foremost: he owes this conversation to his own inner child.

Everyone involved in this situation deserves their own version of closure and no matter how much he hates verbal confrontation, Sunghoon is more than just willing to put his own comfort last to give you what you deserve.

With a soft sigh and a thin veil of tears blurring his vision, Sunghoon stares at his best friend and patiently waits for him to respond, not quite sure what he wants to hear.

“Go to our place”, Jaeyun suddenly says, his big hands gently grabbing Sunghoon’s face as he looks at his closest friend with a genuine, encouraging smile, “she’s agreed to talk to you tonight. I’m gonna send her up there and distract everyone else. Just go, I’ve got this covered.”

Hoonie doesn’t even get the opportunity to thank Jake as he turns around and disappears in the living room, hyping the remaining members of your group up and doing exactly what he’s just reassured him of.

Exhaling deeply, Sunghoon finally manages to find enough courage to make his way to the floor above yours, into his own home.

The following ten minutes feel like the longest ten minutes he’s ever experienced and as the silence of his apartment and late february night slowly become his nightmare, his breath hitches in his throat the second his ears catch up on your footsteps on the other side of the door.

You don’t know how long it takes you to find enough courage to knock on the door of Jaeyun’s and Sunghoon’s shared apartment, but after what feels like an eternity to both you and your former skating partner, you finally get yourself to let go of all the worries and take a deep breath.

However, you feel yourself choking on that exact breath as the door slowly opens and you’re met with the sight of none other than Park Sunghoon. Your first love, your first best friend, the first person who’s ever made you feel worthy of love and affection at the age of six.

Different than you had expected of yourself, you physically can’t stop yourself from looking straight into his face.

Maybe it’s because after all these years of hating his features, you finally see nothing but the young, innocent little boy who didn’t know any better than pushing the ones who hurt him as far away as possible to protect his tiny heart.

Your eyes nervously roam his breathtakingly beautiful features, the usually so stoic and cold expression in his eyes replaced by nothing but softness. It’s not necessarily something you haven’t seen before, since it’s how he looks at his boys and the people he cares about, it’s the fact that after all this time, it’s aimed at you and nobody else.

Sunghoon doesn’t say anything. All he does is take a step to the side with his eyes firmly focused on the floor as he waits for you to walk into the familiar living room and hopefully are the initiator of the whole conversation.

But he knows you won’t be.

There’s something gleaming in the soft colour of your eyes which tells him what exactly your expectations are of this and for some reason a sense of pride washes over him.

No words are spoken as you sit down on the armchair you had gifted them at their housewarming party, the feeling of being all alone in this apartment with just him feeling weirdly comforting to you.

But then again, you’re not very surprised because one thing about Park Sunghoon is that he’s always going to make you feel at ease, no matter where you are.

For a moment it feels like his heart is going to break its way through his rib cage as the pace of his heartbeats increase by the minute, but as soon as Sunghoon finds enough courage to lift his head and look into your eyes, he realises that this is the moment he’s been waiting for all this time.

“I’m sorry.”

The first thing to fall past his lips is an apology, something neither one of you has expected, yet he knows there’s no other way to start this conversation.

“You don’t have to–”, “Don’t – please, don’t trivialize me or my behavior”, Sunghoon is quick to stop you from doing the one thing he’s always scolded you for back when you two used to be close, something you’ve always struggled with as the wish to be loved and appreciated by the people you care for always overshadowed the feelings you’re entitled to.

“I’m sorry, Y/N”, he begins again, the usage of your name sending chills down your whole body as you attentively wait for him to continue at his own pace, “for everything.”

You don’t respond.

Sunghoon knows it’s not because you don’t have anything to say but because you know him well enough to give him the time he needs to process the mess in his head.

“The day of the competition, the one we’ve practiced so long and hard for, I was so excited”, Sunghoon can’t help the smile forming on his lips as all the memories from the favorite time of his life come flooding back, “I knew we were going to kill and make it to the nationals, everyone knew this. But it wasn’t what everyone else was expecting of us, you know I never gave a fuck about any of them.”

All you can do is nod, your body tense as the blood starts thrumming in your ears.

“I was already surprised that we didn’t pick you up on our way to the competition but my mother just said that your siblings would tag along, which is why you guys had to take your car instead of ours, so I didn’t think much of it, until I was already changed and ready, waiting for you to join me on the ice rink during the warm up.”

A deep sigh follows his little story and you can tell from the way he’s rubbing his knuckles just how much patience and willpower it’s taking him to maintain his calm demeanor.

“When I finally saw that fucking monster, I actually felt relieved because I thought she was going to tell me that you’re getting ready and not to worry, but boy was I fucking wrong”, it’s then that his anger finally makes itself visible as the tips of his ears start turning red, his hands now nervously playing with his rings and you actually appreciate how hard he’s trying to keep his composure a lot more than he probably thinks, “I can’t actually believe how naive I was because deep down I knew you would have never done this to me. You were my best friend, the only person I’ve ever let close to my heart.”

It’s his affirmation of your feelings being reciprocated which becomes the trigger for your tears and before you can actually comprehend what’s happening, you feel a single tear leaving a hot trail on your cheek as it makes its way down to your chin, but all you can do is remain as silent as before.

“I guess the anxiety and excitement from the competition clouded my brain because when that bitch told me about how you had decided to quit partner skating because you never actually wanted to do it with me, I didn’t even think that she might be lying. Which is kind of ironic because I never actually believed her anything before that because I always knew what kind of person she is.”

You can tell how much he’s been thinking about his decisions from that day, how much it’s been getting to him and just how much he’s been struggling to accept his mistakes.

Sunghoon has always been his biggest critic, heÄs always been the hardest on himself and while back then you never understood why he chose to be like this to himself, you now know it’s because of the constant state of competition he’s been put under ever since his very first day on this earth.

If there’s one thing his parents have never even tried to hide, it’s their favoritism towards Sunghoon’s older brother, their golden child. You still remember all those times you could barely stand on your feet after a long day of practice, where Hoon would beg you to stay a little longer because he hadn’t perfected a move, his father’s hawk like eyes constantly spotting a new mistake, running the young boy’s self worth and perception. No matter how hard he tried, it was never good enough for his father and even if Sunghoon had accepted this back in his teens, you can still tell how much it’s still affecting him, breaking your heart into millions of pieces.

“So, they started announcing our names and everyone was looking at me”, another deep sigh falls past his lips, his eyes nervously roaming your face, yet skillfully skipping yours as the shame and guilt suddenly becomes more overwhelming than before, “that was the moment I knew I wasn’t gonna listen to whatever you had to say. I was so heartbroken, so angry, I just…didn’t know what to do, so I decided to distance myself from you. To be really honest with you, I never even realized how much I started hating until a lot later but at that point it was too late, the feeling of being betrayed by you, my dearest friend, was simply too much and every single thing I had felt before turned into anger and hatred.”

Sunghoon takes a deep breath and finally lifts his head, his longing eyes meeting yours as you watch the tip of his nose redden, a sight you’re definitely not used to and yet find some kind of comfort in. The fact he’s not holding anything back, not even his tears, calms you down because as the tears are streaming down your cheeks, you know you’re finally being listened to and understood.

“I hated you, so fucking much”, he breathes and runs both of his hands through his thick hair, “you used to be the only person I’ve trusted and seeing you live your life like you didn’t stab me in the back made me so furious, so mad all I wanted was to hurt you. I wanted you to be in just as much pain as me because I thought – I never could have imagined what you had gone through and by the time I was actually mature enough, my ego took over and your presence brought out the worst version of me.”

To hear everything from his perspective feels like he’s ripping up all of your old wounds, yet also healing the ones hidden underneath as he finally gives you the closure you had longed for, for so long.

“Everything I’ve said about you and in your face, everything I’ve done these past few years were because I was too hurt to even think about listening to your version of the whole story and I – don’t know how to even ask for your forgiveness, Y/N. All these years I spent badmouthing and belittling, borderline harassing and humiliating you are in no way excusable and I take full accountability for it. Even if I regret it all right now, I can’t take back all the pain I’ve caused you, no matter how guilty I feel.”

Sunghoon, as usual, chooses his words wisely, every single one of them well thought through as he tries to think of all the things he’s wanted to tell you.

“You know, deep down I always knew that I never actually hated you because no matter how hard I fucking tried, I always found myself wondering if you need anything, if you’re being taken care of, listened to. And I don’t think you have any idea how badly I wanted to be in the boys’ place and just hold you in my arms, tell you that everything’s going to be okay because you always make it through whatever life throws your way.”

His sudden confession definitely takes you aback and it’s then that you realize just how hard you’ve been crying. Usually you’d push yourself into survival mode and suppress all your tears for later, the urge to hide your emotions and especially your vulnerability, something you’ve perfected over the years, only for all of your hard work to be gone in front of Park Sunghoon, of all people.

“The night of Seung’s birthday”, Sunghoon gulps harshly as the memories from that particular moment hit him at full force, “I felt like a fucking monster. Nothing I say or do can justify, excuse or make up for the fact that I treated you the way I did and I guess that’s why I’m still struggling to find the right words to apologize.”

At first, you don’t hear the shaking in his voice as you try to focus on regulating your own breathing all while listening to him, yet as soon as his voice breaks off at the of his sentence, you snap back into reality and feel your heart aching at the sight of Sunghoon’s tears.

“I’ve caused so much damage, so much pain, I don’t – I don’t know how to – what to do or say, Y/N. But no matter what you choose to do after tonight, I’m gonna spend my whole life trying whatever it takes to be worthy of your forgiveness.”

You carefully watch the way he almost aggressively wipes away his tears, a desperate attempt to control his emotions and the longer you look at him, the calmer you become.

“There’s so much more I want to say but I just – I can’t find the right words because no words will ever do justice for the apology you deserve, Y/N”, Sunghoon takes another deep breath, “so please, just…say something, anything.”

The physical distance between the two of you isn’t bigger than a single step, yet you still find yourself getting up on your feet to sit down right next to him, your whole body shaking as all the things you wanna say to him rush through your mind before you look up to meet the eyes you’ve been running away for longer than you can remember, the comfort they come with so familiar, you can’t believe it’s actually been that long since you’ve last allowed yourself to get lost in the sweetest shade of brown you’ve ever seen.

“You know”, you begin quietly, too scared your voice might break if you speak up, “the first few days after that fuck up of a dinner party, I thought I could never forgive you, but the more I thought about you, the more I realised how badly I wanted you back in my life.”

Your words send jolts of warmth straight in Sunghoon’s chest, his heart feeling heavy as you crush all of his worries with just a single sentence, the way you’ve always done.

“I can’t lie and deny just how much you’ve hurt me, Sunghoon”, the urge to reach for his pretty face and pull him close to you feels overwhelming and you still manage to suppress it all as you focus on the things you know you have to get off of your chest first.

“I’m not even referring to the constant bickering and bad mouthing because everyone we both know, knows I did it just as much and bad as you, so I guess we’re even when it comes to that”, you can’t help but chuckle, the sound easily eliciting a soft giggle from the usually so stoic young man, taking even more weight off of your chest.

“That night of Seung’s birthday, I did what I did because I thought I deserved it and the first few times afterwards I craved the pain you caused because it was the only thing keeping me alive after the breakup with Jaemin”, you feel the tears pricking at the corners of your eyes and just as you’re about to swallow them, you watch Sunghoon throw his head back with a soft sob, tears streaming down his temples as he tries to comprehend the fact that his biggest fear had become reality.

Because deep down, he always knew you had used him to punish yourself, because nothing was as disgusting and humiliating as sleeping with someone who had spent so much time treating you like actual shit. Sunghoon never wanted to admit this to himself, simply to save and protect his own heart, so to hear you admit it like this has managed to shatter his world all over again.

“But then…you started kissing me, holding my face and my hands, you even once told me how pretty I looked and I got so confused because you weren’t supposed to make me feel worthy of it all but you did. And the best thing about it all was, you barely ever said anything. It was your actions which showed me how much you regretted leaving me like that after the whole shit show in the lockers room.”

You feel heat creeping up in your neck as all the memories from your moments of intimacy come rushing back but with a soft sigh you look up and realize how much Sunghoon’s been crying, so without overthinking it too much, you reach for his face, gently caressing his damp cheek only for him to quickly place a bunch of soft kisses into your palm as your touch manages to calm down his hitched breathing.

It’s like the world has gone to sleep to give you both all the time and space you need to process lal these weird, never experienced feelings and for the first time in your life, your brain has managed to quiet down.

“It took me a while to understand why I felt the way I did but that night in Tokyo, where you let me fall asleep in your arms, I finally knew”, you never once avert your gaze from his as you try to take deep breaths in hopes of him imitating you, a soft smile creeping up on your face when Sunghoon does just that and before another set of tears can find their way down his cheeks, you take his face into your hands.

“It’s because after all these years, you still feel like home, Sunghoon”, you whisper as your vision gets blurry and the lump in your throat doubles in its size, “you’ve always been my home and you know that.”

And with those words, you manage to not only break his heart into thousands of pieces but actually heal every single open wound in the deepest bits of his cold heart, something he’s been longing for all his life.

“I’m so, so sorry”, he suddenly sobs and tries to move out of your hands, only for you to gently tighten your grip enough to stop his movements, knowing you need him to look at you for all the things you’ve still got to say to be valid.

You’ve waited for this moment for so long, you weren’t gonna let this opportunity go, no matter how much more heartbreaking and gut wrenching it’s bound to become.

“You hurt me”, you say confidently, nto ready to give in just yet, not even to torture him but because you promised yourself to never, ever let yourself down like you’ve always done, “you broke my heart, over and over again. Every time you said something to or about me, you reminded me why my heart had gone so cold and I also wanted you to be in pain. You deserved to be humbled and put in your place for all the things you’ve said to me so I won’t apologize for any of it because even if it wasn’t right, I felt justified in my behavior and so did you, Hoonie.”

At the sound of his favorite nickname in your voice after almost a whole decade of deprivation, Sunghoon’s ears perk up and despite the agonizing pain in his chest, he feels a sense of comfort embrace him in a way only you’ve ever been able to provide him with.

“I haven’t forgiven you”, you quickly clarify, more to yourself than him since the little voice in the back of your head is still filled with rage and the bitter feeling of betrayal and humiliation, whereas your heart has finally started to bloom with nothing but love and adoration for the one and only man you’ve ever felt connected to.

“You don’t have to–”, “Yet. I haven’t forgiven you yet, Hoonie. It’s gonna take a bit for me to get over the whole lockers room part and also some of the things you’ve said because no matter how much you feel like home, the wounds are fresh and they burn. And I know yours do too, which is okay. I know we’re going to make it through this.”

Sunghoon looks at you with genuine shock and surprise fleming in his eyes, followed by a gentle layer of deep sadness the longer he looks at you.

“It’s gonna take a while but we’ve also grown a lot since then, we have a lot of catching up to do, right?”

The enthusiasm and confidence in your voice manage to ease his heart completely now and before Sunghoon can overthink any of it, the one question he’s been suppressing for God knows how long finally makes its way to your ears.

“Can I – hug you?”

For a moment Hoon’s genuinely worried about your reaction, only for you to nod and almost overwhelmingly quickly wrap your arms around his shoulders.

As you bury your face in his neck, you can feel his whole body losing every bit of tension, his strong arms finding their way around your waist, pulling you even closer and a row of soft sighs from the both of you filing the empty space of the quiet living room.

Neither one of you dares to say anything, not a single word. For a moment, you’re afraid that all of this might have been a dream as all the exhaustion and tiredness overwhelms your brain, pushing you into a headspace you’ve never been in before.

Maybe this is what it means to be held by the one you love.

After what feels like an eternity, Sunghoon gently pulls away just enough to keep you as close to his body as possible, his hands carefully holding your face as if he feared to break you like a fragile piece of glass when handled too harshly.

You lose track of time as your former best friend lets his eyes roam your face, memorizing the features he’s had to admire from afar, finally up close,his soft breaths fanning against your warm skin and if it wasn’t for the adrenaline rushing through your veins, you would have fallen asleep right then and there.

“You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever had the privilege to lay my eyes on”, Sunghoon whispers and nudges the tip of his nose against yours, “and I hope that I get the honor of loving you not just in this lifetime, but every single one, Y/N. You know I never did, yet I will spend the rest of my life praying that destiny has written my name next to yours in every single universe because just thinking about loving someone who’s not you hurts my heart. My soul’s been longing to come home, snowflake, thank you for taking my hand and showing me the way back to where I belong.”

“H-Hoonie, I–”, “You don’t have to say it back, not now and not ever. Just keep looking at me with those eyes, will you, my love?”

All you can do is nod as Sunghoon pulls you into another tight hug, this time laying down on the couch, emotional and mental exhaustion overcoming the both of you and even if there’s still so much to say, you know that after tonight, everything’s going to happen when time’s right and as you slowly drift into the most peaceful sleep you’ve ever had, Hoonie’s gentle confession echoes in your head like the sweetest lullaby you’ve ever heard.

← 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 — 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 — 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 →

(A/N: i can't believe i'm finally back after exactly two weeks. this might not be what some of you guys expected but i'm very, very happy with how this turned out and i genui hope you guys love it just as much. i can't even thank you guys enough for all your love, support and patience, as well as all the reassurance and encouragement you've been sending my way. i love and appreciate you all so, so much and i can't even explain how full of love my heart is for you all. thank you thank you thank you thank you 🤍💐☁️✨)

TAGLIST: @soonigiri @en-happiness @lhsvibez @dammit-jjk @heerinnie @primroselover @jungwon-xo @szkstay @lostwonderwall @hoonieluv @certifiedmoa @doodlelibrary @ikeuizm @kpoprhia @sleeping-demons @imtoanonymousforyou @lalalovejay @ineedsomezzz @xrr-s4sha @viagumi @electrobutterfly @mimikittysblog @blurryriki @heelcvr @wonkifangirl @joonzseoulmate @kwiwin @hoondiors @seuomo @zerasari @love-you-twice @aloverga @marz-mars @velvtcherie @niniissus @abrazosolorcereza @ddazed-lhs @acphengene @skz-streamer @kshoshi @tya0 @yizhoutv @jebetwo @myheelody @seokgyuu @blockbusterhee @luvkpopp @heeslut4life

[tofuhoon]

enhypen’s first texts after the breakup genre: angst, comedy (??) warnings: cussing in ni-ki’s read hyung line version here

a/n: hey gang... what's good... trying to soft launch my way back into writing?? ig xd hope u enjoyed!! sorry ni-ki is such a Guy in this

[lovjiwoong]

♡— enhypen!boyfriend calls you clingy — hyung line only. part two — the break up

pairing: enhypen hyung line (ot4) x gender neutral reader | genre: angst | warnings: breaking up over text, hurt, curse words

a/n: this is fictional, it's not real. but please never let anyone treat you this way <3 GUESS WHO IS AN IDIOT? MEEEE. i accidentally deleted this, i still had the parts in my phone (thank god) so this is a repost :) I'm so so sorry for deleting this by mistake!! pls forgive me <3

part one here — main masterlist

permanent taglist: @honeyhuii @soobin-chois @fylithia @enhacolor @ja4hyvn @maiverie @bambisgirl @hiqhkey @its-madi @bobariki @yizhoutv @joonsytip @l33j3n8 @nar-nia @lightprincess-world

[luvvpsh]

GOOD 4 U!

04; (NOT) standing on business

PREV ✩ MASTERLIST ✩ NEXT

╰┈➤ oblivious yn 🤕🤕

SYNOPSIS in which you’re DEFINITELY not upset that your ex moved on really easily (spoiler alert: you are!). Yang Jungwon, the student council president is glad your ex moved on because it’s time for him to shoot his shot (just not in the way he wanted.. a win is a win in his book!)

TAGLIST < open > @firstclassjaylee @sincerelyrki @w0nslvr @poollabug @mrchweeee @nanuer @jwonistic @nyfwyeonjun @jiamini