#ellie williams pop figure

[kvhasproblems]

I GOT THEM ALLL🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩

also peep my agents of shield collection and Ellie

(i have way more at my house, these are just the ones in my dorm room, one day i gotta show off my whole collection)

[cocoakrispis-blog]

✭ 2. REDISCOVERING YOUR GENDER IDENTITY ✭

pairing ~ ellie williams x fem! reader

summary ~ (y/n) is actually quite confident in her gender identity but what happens when she and ellie are forced to partner up and figure some interesting concepts out.

warnings ~ homophobia, tones of a little bit of religious trauma,

wc ~ 2.4k words

SERIES MASTERLIST

the next day of camp was the beginning of your journey to “rediscovering our gender identity”.

this concept was one that you didn’t quite understand.

although this camp had made you loose a lot of the confidence you had in yourself this area was not one of them.

i mean you knew what you were.

a girl.

a girly girl at that.

girly girl that liked to do her own makeup, try out trendy new hairstyles, and wear the softest most pastel colors.

overall you presented very feminine and you were quite confident in your ability to do so.

so this step felt quite useless to you.

as of right now you guys were exploring the housewife part of being a women.

cleaning being the main subject.

you and dina were practicing vacuuming the floor alongside riley who was having a little bit more assistance from maria.

when you glanced up from your vacuum you noticed cat and ellie in the corner giggling about something.

you couldn’t believe that they weren’t even pretending to be semi interested in the lesson.

you felt your jaw clench in irritation and you quickly put your head back down to continue vacuuming and letting your mind wander.

being clean was something that you did out of habit.

you never found yourself doing it in your free time or when you were bored.

a sudden thought popped into your head making you shiver.

‘maybe that’s the problem maybe the normal girls love cleaning even if they didn’t have to’ you thought to yourself subconsciously.

maria eventually noticed cat and ellie not paying attention and decided to call everyone to the floor o that everyone would be forced to pay attention.

“since some of you can not seem to work on your femininity independently we will do this in a group setting.” maria gave cat and ellie a stern look.

“okay girls the number one most important rule to mastering a perfect vacuum job must be to be extremely precise and thorough.” the loud sound of the vacuum being turned on filled up the room.

“you must go in and out and in and out.” maria repeated the phrase over and over as she assisted riley in demonstrating the motion continuously.

something about the scene felt very intimate to you can you couldn’t help but feel your ears burn in response in embarrassment.

you discreetly looked to the other girls to see if maybe you were overreacting but everyone else except for ellie seemed to be having a bit more of an extreme reaction.

you watched as dina bit her lip seductively and cat licked her lips in an almost hungry way.

ellie seemed to be the only one not affected and just stared at the action with a clearly amused look.

the next activity you were doing was trying on wedding dresses.

this was by far your favorite thing you done so far.

you waited patiently from your turn to try on one of the gorgeous wedding gowns and nearly jumped for joy when it was your turn.

as a child you always dreamed of marrying your knight in shining armor in a beautiful gown and you thought it would be another couple years before you could experience it.

however here you were today in a long white gown being fawned over by the rest of the girls.

“wow (y/n) this dress was made for you.” dina complimented you for the 5th time since you had entered the room.

“thank you dina but i still feel like you looked prettier in your dress.” you felt your cheeks warm at her compliment.

“no you definently take the cake today (y/n) you just look like you were born to be in a wedding dress.” riley continued while cat surprisingly nodded along.

“you guys are so sweet.” you clutched the bouquet of flowers to your chest tight.

you had never felt more beautiful in your life and you didn’t want this moment to end.

the moment was ruined though when you realized the only one that wasn’t over there was ellie who was cutting up some paper in the corner.

after you had noticed that maria walked into the room to check on you guys.

once in her line of sight ellie proudly showed off the paper she had been cutting which revealed a paper chain of a bunch off girl is holding hands.

maria huffed before stomping off.

you didn’t understand ellie at all.

you didn’t understand why she had completely removed herself from the activity.

you didn’t understand why she wasn’t over there with the rest of you guys.

and you didn’t understand why she wasn’t showering you with compliments like everyone else.

did she have no desire to graduate this program and become normal again.

she was so confusing and you were completely clueless as to why it bothered you so much.

the last activity you did before taking a break was just to practice makeup.

this one easily slid its way into second place of your favorite activities.

makeup was such a fun way to express yourself and to be rewarded from doing it just made you feel ecstatic.

you finished your makeup much earlier than the other girls due to the fact that you had a lot more experience with it than the other girls.

when you looked up from your designated vanity you saw ellie and cat tucked away together in one of the chairs in the room while ellie playfully drew on cat’s arm.

the feeling that rose in your chest whenever you saw this was unfamiliar but you knew you didn’t like it.

what was so interesting about cat that made ellie want to spend all of her time with her?

you quickly shook your head to rid your brain of those thoughts and turned back to your vanity to see if there was any ways you could improve your already flawless makeup.

after a while of just staring at yourself in the mirror maria entered the room to tell you guys to change back into your uniform and meet her outside so you could have a small chat before lunch.

eventually you all made it over there and were now seated in a circle waiting for maria to begin this outside group therapy session.

“alright girls who is next to report on their root?” mary asked the group softly.

everyone simultaneously turned their head to face you.

you sighed when you felt all of their eyes on you and reluctantly gave a response.

“well i’ve been thinking really hard about what may be the root of my l-lesbianism but i can’t seem to come up with someone.” you twiddle with your finger awkwardly.

“i think pom poms over there is just to afraid to share hers with the group.” ellie rolled her eyes at your response.

“i am not ellie i really just haven’t come up with one what’s yours anyways?” you give the freckle faced girl what you considered a sassy comeback.

“pfft i don’t have to tell you my root i’m brave enough to own up to mine we’re the ones waiting on you to do the same.” ellie gives you a smirk.

you huff and prepare to respond until mary cuts into the tense conversation.

“well actually ellie i think it might be beneficial for (y/n) to be reminded of all of your roots to maybe make her realize what hers is.” maria gives ellie a tight smile. “why don’t you go first.”

“my mom got married in pants.” ellie gives what sounds like a sarcastic response.

everyone claps after she had shared hers and maria called on the next person to go.

“dina.”

“went to an all girls boarding school.” dina replied smoothly.

the group erupted in applause and then maria called on cat to go next.

“i was born in france.” cat sighed.

immidatkley after applause followed and finally it was riley’s turn.

“i like balls.” riley responded plainly.

you all clapped until it eventually died down.

“well thank you from that riley.” maria sent her a smile.

“you see how easy it is (y/n) all you have to do is dig deep down inside your mind right into those memories that cause you pain or sadness and find your root.” maria concluded the conversation.

“and now dina will you come up here.” dina followed her directions and stood up to stand next to her.

once dina was still next to her maia started up again.

“the next thing on the agenda today will be to experience one of the best things about the heterosexual experience.” she paused briefly to build suspense. “friendship!”

“so next i will need you guys to find a partner to be paired up with for the rest of the program.”

since there wasn’t that many of you getting a partner wasn’t too difficult.

however since there was an odd number of people dina was forced to partner with maria while riley and cat ended up together and you were stuck with ellie.

you weren’t sure hwy exactly cat and ellie didn’t decide to partner up together but you decided to not ask any questions because this now gave you a chance to study and maybe further understand the confusing brain of ellie.

“now that we all have your partners sometime later tonight i would like you to practice with these.” maria help up a deck of cards that looked different from anyone you had ever seen or played with before.

after dinner ellie called you over to practice the cards so that she could make quick work of it and go to sleep.

after that you found were maria had placed the cards, grabbed a deck, and took a seat across from eachother in the designated area where you were supposed to be practicing the cards.

you weren’t very sure on what you were supposed to be doing but held up a card to maybe kickstart the game.

the first card you held up was one with a red background and a woman throwing away trash with a bright smile on her face.

“it’s a lady.” ellie shot out the first thing that came to her mind.

“well uh yeah but what else.” you attempted to urge her to deepen her description.

“i don’t know.”

you rolled her eyes at her uninterested response and tried to help her out.

“she’s also a mother, a wife, and a daughter.”

ellie nodded along with an almost blank look on her face.

“once you learn about the important roles women have you can stop objectifying them.” you sigh softly.

“well have you done that?” ellie snatched the deck out of your hand to investigate them herself.

“i w-well i’m still trying to look for my root.” you stutter out a pathetic response.

“oh yeah must be so hard to think about other stuff when your princess brain doesn’t allow you to dwell on anything that isn’t dresses and makeup.” ellie hums rudely.

you gasp at the meanness of her words and defiantly cross your arms in front of your chest.

“i’ll have you know i’m actually very smart i make straight a’s in school.” you defend yourself to ellie even though she’s obviously not listening.

“it’s your turn.” ellie finally stops fiddling up the cards and shows you one she had obviously messed with.

the card displayed a very well developed women obviously rest out of the shower.

you squeak in shock once you process the picture and almost curse when you feel ellie pinch your arm hard.

“you’re gonna have to be more prepared for temptation in the real world (y/n).” elllie gives you a shit eating grin, obviously very pleased with her own little prank.

in that instance you wanted to do nothing more than slap ellie right across the face but decided to be more ladylike and opt for giving her a glare and stomping off to the sleeping quarters.

the next day you were continuing to work on the whole housewife lifestyle but it was more focused on childcare.

unfortunately it wasn’t similar to yesterday and there was a lot more lecturing involved and only one hands on activity.

after you had made it through the third and final lecture it was time to simulate changing a baby’s diaper using realistic baby dolls.

much to your dismay this activity required to use teamwork to work with your partner.

you were still quite upset at ellie for the way that she had treated you last night but did your best to try and start fresh today.

“make sure you work together with your partner to successfully put this diaper on because if you don’t manage the consequence may be quite inconveniencing i used food dye as the urine to raise the stakes a bit……” maria’s speech turned into background noise as you begun to argue with ellie.

“dude that’s the wrong tab.” ellie tried to snatch the diaper out of your hand.

“no it is not you’re the one doing it wrong can you just hold it still for me so i can handle this.” you snatch the diaper back from her.

you continued to go back and forth with the baby not even realizing maria had walked up to you two to reprimand you for all of the arguing.

while you wrestled the baby in between you two the pee ended up releasing and purple food dye splashed all over maria’s face.

once you saw the absolutely livid look on maria’s purple covered face you and ellie immediately looked at eachother and bit your tongues to hide the laughter.

“why don’t i go get you guys another doll.” maria sighs while attempting to wipe the color off of her face before turning around to retrieve another doll for your pair.

as soon as she left you and ellie looked at each other again and burst into a fit of giggles.

this was the first time you had heard ellie genuinely laugh and you were shocked at how soft and melodic it was.

you wanted to make her laugh again.

maybe getting partnered up with ellie wouldn’t be so bad.

a/n: i am actually so incredibly shocked that i ended up being able to finish this chapter i was so exhausted before starting this but i stil somehow managed to end up in through. we are finally getting somewhere with ellie and i am so excited to right more interactions between both of them. anyways thank you guys so much for the support on the series so far i hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!!

taglist: @st4r-b3rries @dollyvuu @lvlymicha @jellyfishrnice @machetegirl109 @smiths-fan--13 @elliewilliamssrealgf @ravyaryn @yuhgetintoonit @nelzooo @luvmily @dearestdolly444 @venuzasmuse @madislament

[totheblood]

the hard way. [masterlist]

PAIRING: rockstar!ellie williams x ex-gf!reader

SUMMARY: you and ellie broke things off years ago, everyone knew this. what they didn't know was why. when a mysterious anonymous account pops up, seeming to know what happened, you and ellie are forced into talking again to find out who it is. problem is she's a rockstar and on tour, you may just have to figure it out over text.

WARNINGS: cursing, mentions of drinking/drugs, mentions of s*x, there will/may be se*ts so thats a warning.. dark themes in later chapters (will be trigger warned)

↳ prolouge

part i. (r)

part ii. (e)

part iii. (r)

part iv. (e)

part v. (r)

part vi. (e)

part vii. (r)

part viii. (e)

part ix. (r)

part x. (e)

[hunnylagoon]

When I Was Your Girl

Stage Fright

Rockstar! Ellie Williams x pop star! Reader

‘Fame is a poison most would drink happily despite the warning of a slow and painful death’

Premise: You and fell in love as nobodies and fell out of love in the limelight. Now you are forced to deal with ghosts who haunt you like a melody.

Warnings: small mentions of drinking and drugs / wee bit of violence / Ellie is a dick

Fake albums mentioned: Solstice / Smokey Eyes

I've never been anything more than a joke.

I'm so childish they took it for maturity, and I'm so serious they took it for silly.

Even since I began my career, I was spotted at eighteen by a skeezy producer when I sold myself at a strip club to make ends meet, because dreaming never paid the bills. I wish that I had been found somewhere else, maybe one of the restaurants I sang at on karaoke nights or the park where I poured my soul into art through my uncle’s old acoustic guitar. 

"How are you feeling right now?" A tanned woman with slick back hair shoves a microphone into my face while an emotionless man holds the camera. "I mean, seven years in the industry and you've just received your first Grammy nominations."

"I'm feeling kind of freaked out, to be honest," I face the woman with a sheepish smile on my face, trying the best I can not to look at the large camera lurking beside me.

"Rightfully," Her teeth are so white that they almost blind me and I get distracted by myself as I try to figure out whether they are veneers or not. "Do you think you'll be bringing any hardware home tonight?"

She moves the microphone back to my face and I flinch out of instinct, we both laugh for the camera but I can tell she's annoyed "Honestly, I'm just happy to be here, as corny as it sounds it is such an honour to be around so many incredible artists."

"So humble," She smiles then turns to the camera to address the viewers "I think we all know she's gonna be sleeping tonight with a golden gramophone under her pillow," She forces a laugh, trying to capture the raw essence of this overly manufactured moment. The interviewer turns back to me "Now, I know this isn't your first rodeo, is there anyone here you aren't looking forward to seeing, you don't have to name any names."

Fuck I hate these bloodsuckers. She is so obviously trying to milk my broken engagement which was still very much fresh. I uphold my false smile though and shake my head "Nope, if anything I think I'm looking forward to some mingling,"

She looks irritated, covering it up only by a close-lipped smile. "Well, then I'll let you get on with that."

I give her a curt wave and continue my way down the red carpet, maneuvering through other celebrities, we all have common ground, we are blinded by the flashing lights. I try my best to avoid any more journalists but I see Abby Anderson speaking to one and sneak up behind her, tapping her on the shoulder.

She turns around and greets me with a huge smile "I was wondering when I was gonna see you," Abby smiles and slings an arm around my shoulders looking to the journalist while I glance at the camera "I'm telling you, this girl needs to clear some space out on her trophy shelf."

I grin at her, genuinely. Abby had always been kind to me, we first met when I was nineteen and the both of us signed up for Atlantic Records. "She's just being nice," I say.

"And she's just being humble!" Abby squeezes me, it's a simple gesture but it means the world to me, it's her way of saying 'I got you'.

I shake my head "Abby is gonna be the real winner tonight."

The man holding a microphone in front of us smiles "We'll see who's right, my bet is both of you," He turns his attention to me directly "So I understand that you took a bit of a break after releasing your album, Solstice, is this considered your comeback?"

"Nope," I smile despite wanting to snatch the microphone from his hand and beat the camera with it until it shatters "There isn't anything to come back from."

He tilts his head giving the over-animated 'Are you serious?' look for whoever is watching. Every journalist was like a vampire trying to bleed me dry. The journalist, impeccably dressed in a tailored suit that exudes both sophistication and confidence searches his mind for another question "Well your album honestly was such a work of art and there has been talk that you are working on another one, is there anyone here that inspired any of those songs?"

"Nope."

"I think we should ask Ellie the same question," He laughs at his joke like it was funny. 

"And I think we should be heading off now," Abby answers for me and guides me away from the barricade of reporters and journalists, away from the cameras prying into my soul.

As I walk along the red carpet, I don't bother to stop and pose for any more pictures, I pick up the long skirts of my dress and usher myself to weave between the other celebrities. I nearly turn my ankle and take a tumble, wow, sure glad that 30 photographers caught that moment.

I was drenched in a deep, enchanting shade of midnight blue, the gown captivated with its sleek silhouette. The magic shows in the intricate details that adorn the fabric, reminiscent of the cosmos itself. Delicate embroidery of constellations graces the entire dress, forming a celestial tapestry that seems to come alive under the harsh shine of lights. The celestial patterns are meticulously sewn into the fabric, resembling a night sky filled with stars and constellations, creating an ethereal and otherworldly charm. Paired with the constellation dress, I wear a diamond choker and matching teardrop earrings.

I had lost Abby at some point in my little runaway leaving me to get into the auditorium where the award ceremony is to take place. 

Nearly the very second I walk in I hear a man yell my name, he is seated in the second row and it takes an awkwardly long amount of time for him to jog over to me. "Hey, kid!" He grins, hugging me, I don't hug him in return, I just freeze. It was Graham Wilson, I could smell the liquor on his breath.

Graham Wilson was a man who used to write very successful rock songs in his twenties with his band (the majority now deceased), he was nearing his sixties and was the definition of a has-been. I remember when I was a kid and I would listen to him on my iPod; though in recent days he's become known for ridiculous stunts, DUIs and homophobic tweets, even better known for how he found out I was gay and announced that he was no longer homophobic because, in his words 'Those gays can sure write good music' and then thanked me in his tweet, even tagging my account.

His frame carries the weight of a bygone era, specifically his beer belly. His once-lustrous, shoulder-length hair has succumbed to streaks of gray, hanging limply around his face like faded echoes of a rebellious past. Despite the passage of time, a few remnants of the rockstar allure linger - a faint scar above his right eyebrow, a reminder of a wild night in an underground club, and the subtle tattoos peeking out from under the sleeves of his wrinkled suit jacket.

"Hey, Graham," I give him a tight-lipped smile out of courtesy, in no means do I wish to talk to him. 

"You better win best album tonight," He gives me a hard slap on the back. Every time I see him he acts like we're friends just because he was a judge on a singing reality show that I was on seven years prior.

"I'll try my best," I try to excuse myself but he speaks again.

"I said seven years ago when I saw you on that stage that you were gonna be a star so don't let me down," He points a finger at me and gives me a weird smirk. When he smirks I almost think he's having a stroke until he starts to laugh and reveals his rows of teeth that are beginning to rot from his not-so-subtle drug abuse.

"Okay," I give him a nod and a quick wave goodbye to sneak away and pretend that I didn't converse with him. It seems like I'm early to take my seat, people are still piling in and being ushered to their spots, and seat fillers are standing around sheepishly while they try to take discreet photos of celebrities.

My seat is on the end of row two, right on the aisle, I feel myself split into a grin. If you weren't aware, Who sits where is a major status symbol. And though awards show organizers may deny it, it's awfully convenient to be sitting in the front row or on the aisle if you're about to accept a ton of trophies.

I was shaking with nerves, I got nominated three times and maybe there was hope that I would win at least one category.

When I saw Ellie I almost wanted to hide my face, she walked in with a new girl she slung her arm around, Jesse, Dina, and Cat in tow. I'm thankful to see that they're sitting front row of the opposite section of me and have yet to notice me.

I'm not sure if you have ever fallen in love, dated, gone on tour, moved in together, adopted a dog, written a couple of songs, got engaged, then broken up with someone and had the entire thing be documented publically but it's not the best feeling when you have to be in the same room as them again.

Everything with Ellie used to be so perfect.

The first thing I ever noticed about her were her eyes, her sad eyes. She looked like a puppy that had been kicked around for far too long; neglected and mistreated by whoever was cruel enough to show her such torment. Her eyebrows furrowed like each thought running through her head was a worry.

It's hard to look at her now, I know this girl inside out but we are strangers. 

I liked to pretend that the beautiful girl she was with was just there for show but I knew it was untrue when I saw her snake her hand around her waist just like she did to me. She runs through girls like they're cigarettes, she uses them until they burn out or she grows sick of them.

Two years ago at this very same award show, Ellie accepted Song of the Year for the song she wrote about me, 'Everlong'. She had even invited me on stage during her speech and announced to the world how in love she was with me.

If only I knew I could come to hate someone I used to love to death.

My hate was only solidified when Ellie and the Ashmen dropped their most recent album titled 'Smokey Eyes' just three months after our broken engagement. The entire album was about me and dear god it almost ruined my career.

Ellie had managed to paint me in a horrible light that made me seem like the scum of the earth. She wrote about me having substance issues and overall just sang happily about how much she despised me. Her song 'Me vs Your Friends' wrecked me. After speculation began over that song online, her fans decided that they loathed me just the same as Ellie did; this meant that I was doxxed, sent death threats, had my home broken into, and forced to move.

She wasn't the slightest bit sorry.

I spent the award ceremony dazed out, to be truthful, these types of events were boring. They dragged on for ages and you had to sit through the same generic speeches over and over again of people thanking their parents and producers, I hated both of those.

I watched as Amelia Swan walked on stage, she was a nepotism baby, the daughter of some big-shot director and beautiful all the same. In the glittering spotlight of the grand award show stage, a vision of elegance takes center stage as the next announcer for the evening. A beautiful woman, her porcelain skin seemingly kissed by moonlight, graces the audience with a timeless allure. Her dark, cascading hair frames her face in a sleek, sophisticated manner, accentuating the delicate features that radiate a captivating charm.

Draped in a resplendent pink gown, the fabric sits tight against her slim body. The gown is a masterpiece of design. Its silhouette accentuates her figure with tasteful precision, while the soft hue of pink complements her fair complexion.

"Hello!" She smiles and the crowd begins to cheer "I'm going to cut to the chase because I know all of you are as excited to find out the winner as I am."

Amelia begins to go through the nominees, my breath hitches in my throat when she says my name, though I play it cool the best I can and smile softly when the camera zooms in on me in the crowd.

Her eyes, framed by carefully styled lashes and a hint of rosy eyeshadow, exude warmth and confidence. Lips adorned with a subtle shade of pink curve into a welcoming smile, inviting the audience to share in the excitement of the announcement. 

"The winner of Album of the Year is..." I could've sworn I nearly passed out when Amelia said my name.

Nothing felt real, it was like I was living the dreams that I made up when I was a little girl staying up late in my uncles back yard, talking to the indigo sky and speaking to it with delusions of security and stardom.

I shake when I stand up from my chair. The person next to me hugs me and I don't even know who she is but I hug her in return.

Amelia gestures for me to join her on stage with a huge smile on her face. I make my way down the aisle and up the steps leading to the stage. Amelia handed the statue of the golden gramophone to me along with the microphone to give my speech.

At this moment, the stage is my kingdom "I didn't prepare anything because I honestly didn't think I would win but I'd like to thank my little sister, Marceline, and my late uncle, Richie, god rest his soul. Everything I've done leading me to this moment has been for them, every lyric, every night I'm up till dawn writing. Even though Richie can't be here in person, I carry a little piece of him with me everywhere I go, he's all around me, I see him in the songs I write, in the melody of an acoustic guitar, and in the faces of those gentle enough to show me kindness."

The audience applauds for me, even Ellie who stares me down bitterly. I had sung in front of thousands of people but it would never compare to this moment.

I wipe a tear away from my eye "I would also like to thank all of my fans, you guys are just the fucking best," I giggle through my crying "I feel like you've been sent down by Richie and Marceline I know you're watching me right now, please give my dog some love for me. Please know that I don't come from anything, I was born from dirt and dreams for something more than a ratty town in Canada."

I lived for the applause.

"I mean, I've always been good and never great so this means a lot to me-

Ameilia places a hand on my shoulder to stop me "There was a bit of a mix-up," She announces "I'm sorry, love, you didn't win," She says just to me, dark eyes full of remorse.

"What?" I almost think it's a sick joke.

Amelia holds the microphone to her face to be heard by the audience "I'm not joking," She shows the contents of a card to the crowd "The real winners for album of the year are Ellie and the Ashmen for their album Smokey Eyes." Gasps sound from the audience and I can only imagine what those watching from home are doing

The camera pans to where Ellie, Dina, Jesse, and Cat sit, Ellie is laughing; not laughing, cackling, it only grows and now she's laughing so hard she can barely breathe. Suddenly I didn't feel like I was king of the world, it felt like the desolation of a hangover had hit me in the span of 90 seconds.

Dina gives Ellie a harsh elbow to her bicep, telling her to be respectful. The four of them rise from their chairs and make their way up to the stage, where I stand, paralyzed.

"Congratulations," I give Ellie a tight-lipped smile and hand the award off to her.

She smiled smugly at me and took it "Thanks, smokey eyes," Ellie held the statue up to display it. Smokey eyes was a nickname she had given me when we first met since I always had dark circles she said they looked like smoke from a forest fire. I told you that album was about me. What made me more mad is that it was such a stupid fucking nickname.

My mouth goes dry, it tastes like salt and failure.

I take many steps back, trying to hide myself at the back of the stage while I watch the Ashmen bathe in the glory I thought was mine.

"I didn't prepare anything because I honestly didn't think I would win," Ellie begins to mock me "But I'd like to thank my best friends, Dina, Jesse, and Cat, I couldn't have done it without you," She motions at her band members beside her "But I also couldn't have done it without my dad, thank you, Joel, you're out there in the cheap seats but I fucking love you," She waves out into the crowds somewhere before handing the microphone off to Dina.

"I am so beyond grateful-

"No!" Someone yells from the ground and all attention turns to him "This is not fair!" Graham shouts, walking up the stairs. Everyone in the room looks at one another trying to figure out what is going on. Graham snatches the microphone from Dina "I'm proud of you four but listen."

Everyone is silent completely, no one is sure what to do so we let Graham continue.

"I met everyone on this stage seven years ago," He throws one arm out for dramatics "Except for Amelia, I don't know you," Graham is more dishevelled than he was when I saw him earlier that night "Let me tell all of you that Ellie was in love with this girl since the day they met!" Graham points at me, now things are getting weird, well weirder. “I know because I was there and you all saw it on TV!”

It was no secret that Ellie and I were together since we met on Road to Stardom, a singing reality show where people compete for-well, stardom. Every step of our relationship had been very public, not by choice but by unfortunate circumstances. It is for this reason I was afraid of what Graham would spout next.

"Without her, Smokey Eyes wouldn't have ever been written, Ellie would've had no inspiration for it," He babbles "But more so my point is, Solstice deserved to win, Smokey Eyes is mediocre at best!"

People in the audience look genuinely concerned, I spot Abby in the third row. She has one hand covering her mouth from pure shock, her eyebrows are furrowed and she almost looks like she's going to throw up.

 "Solstice is the best album to listen to when you're high off salvia on your bathroom floor!" Graham points back at me.

I see Cat mutter something to Jesse along the lines of "He's not wrong."

"Smokey Eyes has three good songs and Solstice has thirteen!" Graham suddenly stops to turn and look at me, he grabs my wrist "Come up here and finish your speech," I shake my head no but he pulls me up anyway.

I freeze, petrified. My eyes are wide and my lips are pressed together in a thin line. I didn't know what to do. Why wasn't anyone doing anything?

Graham's head suddenly snaps from me to Ellie where he takes an intoxicated step closer to her "Give me that damn award, you don't deserve it, especially not after mocking the woman who inspired it!" He lunges for the statue, at first Ellie is stubborn and holds onto it tight.

After 30 seconds of Graham trying to pry the stature away, Ellie gives up and releases it, figuring it best not to fight with a drunk man; in doing so Graham's elbow flies back from sudden loss of resistance and hits me dead in my nose. I yelp out in pain bending over into a crouch and clutching my nose. Graham stumbles back and trips over me, though he is still holding on tight to the statue.

Jesse approaches him slowly. "Hey, man, It's me, I think we should all just settle down and talk this through," He tries to act cool but his eyes are full of worry "I agree, I think Solstice is a great album and it really deserved to win."

Graham clumsily rolled onto his stomach and then stumbled back onto his feet. He was staring Jesse down like this was the Wild West.

Dina rushed over to me to make sure I was okay "Let me see," She gingerly moved my hands away from my nose, it had been knocked crooked and blood was pouring down to my chest where it pooled at the neckline of my dark dress.

Graham chucked the golden gramophone at Cat who jumped back when he did so and took a swing at Jesse who didn't move an inch or even shudder from his drunken punch. It also didn't help Graham that he was a solid four inches shorter than Jesse. Just as Graham was hyping himself up to send another hit, two bulky men grabbed either of Graham's arms and dragged him off the stage and out of sight.

I went home that night with nothing more than a broken nose, and no award but I could rest knowing that night went down infamously in history. My blood dripped onto the stage of the Grammys.

That was the night I truly became famous.

Grade eight- Age thirteen 

Middle school is hard.

Even harder when you have two friends, one of them is a guy who is obsessed with Star Wars and is hardly at school because he's always having an allergic reaction, and the other friend is my English teacher. I ate lunch in her class while he graded schoolwork on days that Milo was too sick to show up for school.

I never understood why kids are so fucking mean. Like sometimes I'm having a good day and then I remember when I sang at the middle school talent show.

Some kid who was destined to have a blunt in his hand finished doing tricks on his skateboard rolled off stage and it was my turn.

In the dimly lit auditorium, adorned with colourful decorations for the annual school talent show, I took center stage with my guitar, a blend of excitement and nervousness etched across my face. The hushed whispers of the audience faded as I strummed the first chords, the notes carrying the beginning to the first of many performances in my life

"If you gave me only one wish,

I wouldn't want to feel this way.

They told me I'd have your memory

But all I want is you to stay

And I can't stop my mind from haunting me,

It's like a scar on a butterfly's wing,

I wanted you to know."

I had worked tirelessly to perfect the lyrics to my first ever song, begging my uncle who was far more practiced for his input. This was way back when I still lived in fuck ass nowhere Alberta, I had that country twang in my high voice though it carried a specific tenderness.

"This beautiful pain that I feel is all because of you

And one day these bones will heal

And they'll leave me with the truth

And I'll give you everything if it's the last thing that I do.

This beautiful pain, this beautiful pain

This beautiful pain for you."

However, as I sang my little heart out, a different melody began to play in the background - the snickers and hushed comments of some classmates who couldn't appreciate the vulnerability I laid bare on the stage. Their laughter, like discordant notes in a once-harmonious piece, reverberated through the auditorium.

"If I sailed the world on stormy seas

Chasing sunlight that I can't see.

I was a dreamer here before,

Before I woke up and fell to the floor

And I'd climb to heaven if I could find you,

Even with a scar this butterfly flew.

I wanted you to know."

I spotted one group in particular, they hated me already and this would give them all the more reason to bully me.

"This beautiful pain that I feel is all because of you

And one day, these bones will heal

And they'll leave me with the truth

And I'll give you everything if it's the last thing that I do

This beautiful pain, this beautiful pain, this beautiful pain."

Maybe the lyrics were the slightest bit corny but I was thirteen and these girls were being little cunts. I bit back the tears I so clearly wanted to release when I saw a teacher had to walk over to the group of girls to stop their laughing. It wasn't just that one group though, kids scattered all over were fighting back giggles and that made it hurt all the worse.

"And all I'll ever need

And all I'll ever be,

Within every part of me is this,

This beautiful pain that I feel is all because of you

And one day these bones will heal

And leave me with the truth

And I'll give you everything 'cause it was all I ever knew.

This beautiful pain,

This beautiful pain,

This beautiful pain,

For you."

As the last note hung in the air, the room was divided. Some applauded, recognizing the authenticity of my performance, while others continued their derisive comments. So the majority who liked my singing were teachers, but that didn't matter, at least my music got through to someone.

The rest of the day was even more difficult than my three-minute performance, at least that was over quickly but the comments from Kennedy and her friends left me leaving school in tears.

I didn't go home that day, I walked the extra ten minutes to get to my uncle's house. Lugging my guitar and newfound hate for music with me. The façade, adorned with a mismatched collection of potted plants and a welcoming, hand-painted sign that read ‘Home Sweet Home’ hinted at my uncle's efforts to infuse joy into his surroundings. The paint on the wooden shutters might have faded, but they held stories of many seasons gone by. The roof, patched with a variety of materials, showed the resourcefulness of my uncle in their attempt to shield the interior from the whims of weather. 

He tried to make the house look nice for me and my little sister. He was by no means rich in money but rich in what mattered, the love he had for me was overflowing.

It wasn't a particularly nice neighbourhood either, his house was small, with two bedrooms and a basement I wasn't allowed in. But every time I think of the chipped blue walls, I feel a warm sense of nostalgia run down my spine.

"Who's there?" I hear Uncle Richie call from the kitchen where he is cooking something.

"Just me," I yell back, dropping my guitar case on the ground and belly-flopping onto his old brown leather couch that had more tears in it than I could count; he had tried to stich some of them up with embroidery floss but ultimately gave up, deciding to let it be since he couldn't afford to replace it.

"Why aren't you at your mom's, Chickadee?"

"I don't wanna see Mom right now, she's gonna put me in an even worse mood," I call back grabbing the TV remote off of the water-damaged coffee table.

"What happened?"

"I don't wanna talk about it."

Minutes later Richie walks into the living room to join me, he carries a bowl of Kraft Mac and cheese with two forks shoved in it, he taps the bottom of my socked feet, signalling for me to move them so he can fit on the couch with me. Uncle Richie has a buzz cut and beard stubble that I have never seen him without, he has never been seen without a flannel on, not as long as I've been alive. What I remember the clearest about him though was the scar beneath his right eye, when I was younger he would tell me that he got it from a pirate though I stopped believing that. "So are you going to tell me why you're sulking?"

I ignore him and he reaches for the remote to turn the TV off "Hey, I watching that," I mutter.

"Well I'm waiting for you to answer me, Chickadee," He tilts his head "Or you won't get any kraft dinner."

"I sang at the talent show today."

"And?"

"Everyone made fun of me."

He furrows his eyebrows "Why would they do that?"

"Why do you think?" I snark "Because I'm not good enough and I'm a bad singer and I have a shit guitar." I immediately regret my words. Uncle Richie was the one who gave me that guitar, it was all he could manage with his income, it was his back when he had dreams of his own but he fixed it up so I could pick up where he left off. The guitar itself had a cracking between the face and the side that was being held together with duct tape, not to mention the whole thing was basically reinforced with superglue and there were Sharpie drabbles on it of poems and potential songs Richie started that I will be sure to finish.

"This is the best guitar in the world," He reaches behind the couch where I left it slugs the case onto his lap and opens it to showcase the guitar "Because it's full of something money can’t buy, there is love built into this guitar and every time you play it you feel that love."

"I don't feel love when I play," I say, eyes brimming with tears.

"Then you're not playing right," He smiles, discarding the case on the floor "Did you play the song I helped you write?"

I nod "Kennedy said it was worse than shoving nails into her ears and that my guitar was decrepit and even more fugly than I am."

"Well Kennedy is a little cunt," He answers "Don't tell anyone I said that." His words make me giggle. I watch him intently as he begins to strum some chords on the guitar, the beginning of Beautiful Pain, he stops when I don't sing the lyrics, glancing at me until the words finally fall from my lips.

After the first two Stanzas, he hands the guitar off to me, nodding his head along to my gentle strums.

When I finish the song and strike the last chord, Richie claps a huge smile on his face "Do you feel the love yet?"

"I dunno."

"Then play again," He says "Don't think about those bitchy little girls," His tone is dead serious "You just gave all of those people a free performance, in ten years they are going to be paying hundreds just to get a bad seat at one of your shows and they will buried so far in the back of your mind that you won't even remember their names or all of those awful words they say to you, the only words that will matter are the ones you sing."

"So what do I do?"

"Play music because you love it, it doesn't matter if it takes you anywhere or if it makes you any money. That's why you should play, play for love not greed."

Wordlessly I begin the song over again, blocking out the rest of the world while I softly sing the lyrics. I strum each cord perfectly, my singing to match. I will forever think back to this moment, this is where I can pinpoint the exact second I fell in love with music.

I wrap up the song and Richie speaks up "Do you still want to watch TV?"

I shake my head "Can you help me write another song?" 

-

Sinjinisoverboard: I love love love the new single but does anyone else miss her debut era?????? I feel like she's sold out

     woodmonkey92: Reply to Sinjinisoverboard╰┈➤ this is so true, I remember when she would sing in parks and she was actually happy just being herself

     theend_is_n3ar: Reply to woodmonkey92╰┈➤ bruh you don't remember that, she was a nobody when she sang in parks plus she literally got heckled and ridiculed by her classmates so bad that she gave up on singing in public and almost gave up on music as a whole

     user37768638493: Reply to sinjinisoverboard╰┈➤ as much as I love her it really seems like she's fallen off the rails

conner_stoll_it: She's not even the same person anymore. I fell in love her original music and who she was when she wrote it, then she signed with a record label now she's an in-genuine copy of every pop star.

     Alina_b12: Reply to conner_stoll_it╰┈➤ you fell in love with her old music?? 💀💀💀 she wasn't even past 100 subscribers when she released her debut album and after she released she literally gained 11 listeners on Spotify to get a total of 24 so don't lie and say that you heard it before hearing her mainstream music

     Luciaisdonewithlife: Reply to conner_stoll_it╰┈➤ Her old music was so relatable, she got famous and it’s kind of hard to relate to someone who's net worth is more money then I can even fathom

     hazeinmorningcraze: Reply to Luciaisdonewithlife╰┈➤I think that's why it was so easy for everybody to side with Ellie during the breakup, Ellie kept true to who she is, her girlfriend however did not.

     Luciaisdonewithlife: Reply to hazeinthemorningcraze╰┈➤*fiancé

     hazeinthemorningcraze: Reply to Luciaisdonewithlife╰┈➤ ew don't remind me

     maiya_onthec0ast: Reply to conner_stoll_it╰┈➤ We should remember that no one listened to her when she released her debut music. She said in an interview that before she signed with Atlantic Records she had 24 listeners and 76 subscribers. We only know who she is because of her mainstream music, you aren't better than anyone for needlessly hating on her.

stargirlthesequel: God who else misses the southern twang she used to have in her voice?

      Vampire_empire2: Reply to stargirlthesequel╰┈➤LMAO acting like you know her is crazy

      Aline_b12: Reply to stargirlthesequel╰┈➤parasocial relationships are really becoming apparent rn

thismightbeskylarwwhiteyo: It's soooooo annoying when people hate on Solstice for being mainstream like all Ashmen discography isn't top on charters since they dropped their first album

     dancedancerev0lution: Reply to thismightbeskylarwwhiteyo╰┈➤I've been saying this! Ellie has been in the industry way longer, she's always had a big fan base, even when she was still a solo artist!

    elliespurplemonster: Reply to thismightbeskylaarwwhiteyo╰┈➤ Ellie Williams on 🔝

    call_urm0ther: Reply to elliespurplemonster╰┈➤ kys she treated her fiancé horribly

    elliespurplemonster: Reply to call_urm0ther╰┈➤ how would you know that????? Were you there??????

    follow_kendra88: Reply to call_urm0ther╰┈➤Ellie was the one who was treated horribly in that relationship, have you even listened to Smokey Eyes?

    ellies_no2girl: Reply to call_urm0ther╰┈➤Ellie was so in love and just got used for fame 🥺💔

     call_urm0ther: Reply to ellies_no2girl╰┈➤fuck off with your cringe ass emojis

sorryyileft___:You guys are so weird for saying Ellie was used by her ex for fame, they literally were on the same show at the same age at the same time and got thrown into the limelight at the same time, Ellie and the Ashmen just got more popular.

   mybodyisacage: Reply to sorryyileft___╰┈➤Ellie had a bit of a YouTube presence before she was on Stardom, it wasn't a crazy number but it was a cult following and that's why she won Stardom, bc she had fans to begin with then gained even more after being on national television

    elliespurplemonster: Reply to mybodyisacage╰┈➤She didn't win bc of following she won bc she's a good artist

    mybodyisacage: Reply to elliespurplemonster╰┈➤I never said she wasn't

bodhi_van34: I thought the whole thing at the Grammy's was an act until I saw all those news articles about Graham Wilson getting arrested

  carlyswarly: Reply to bodhi_van34╰┈➤They did a drug test when he got arrested and found coke in his system

    may0mayyyo: Reply to carlyswarly╰┈➤A busboy who worked the event said that Graham was doing cocaine in the bathroom

   body_van34: Reply to may0mayyyo╰┈➤ LMAO WTF 

charlotte_5freakingdidit: EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT ELLIE WILLIAMS BEING MEAN TO HER EX BUT GRAHAM WILSON LITERALLY ASSAULTED A POPSTAR ON STAGE AND TRIED TO THROW HANDS WITH JESSE LMAO IM DIFFUSING

juliaa__stirling: The way Ellie was laughing when Amelia said she messed up the cards was so rude and immature. Her fans are insane for defending her. All of that just because her ex fiancé gave a speech about working hard, imagine how she felt after being so honest with everyone just for her to not actually win and think about how she feels now reading all of these posts.

botoxangel: Celebrities have feelings too, Amelia made a mistake she's probably embarrassed but not as embarrassed as that poor woman is for putting her soul into a speech just for her ex and all of her fan girls to ridicule her for a mistake that wasn't even hers.

    karaleaah778: Reply to botoxangel╰┈➤exactly! And why are people blaming Amelia??? She was given the envelope by someone else, she genuinely thought her friend won.

carlosislost: Why is Graham even invited to these events?????????

katie_katelynsm1th: Reply to carlosislost╰┈➤Bc it's funny when he causes a scene

howto_nevrst0ppbeingsad: I know you guys think this Grammy situation is so funny but it's really not. Graham is clearly mentally ill, this is a cry for help.

   elleryc3llery: Reply to howto_nevrst0ppbeingsad╰┈➤Dude it's hilarious

  3emmettttt: Reply to howto_nevrst0ppbeing sad╰┈➤The way you're worried about the has been and not the girl whose nose he broke

allysaaaa663638: LMAO THE WAY SHE ACTUALLY THOUGHT SHE WON THE AWARD AND SHE DESERVED IT SHDBDBEGHWWBSV

jessicadacoolest: Ellie is so real for laughing bc I would've done the same tbh

hennyrumwine: Dumb bitch deserved to be hit lollllllll

4444carmencarmen4444: I love the Ashmen's music but I hate Ellie sm, I just feel like she's a fuck girl and she gives me very rude vibes. Like laughing at her ex and then mocking her heartfelt speech is INSANE anyways stream Solstice

sittingwaiting_wishing: I honestly have hated Ellie since the breakup, she's changed so much since then. She used to be funny now she's just mean.

carissaandher_h0ttakes: I still think it's kind of crazy that Dina and Jesse followed through with Ellie on Smokey Eyes because they were really close to her when she was engaged to Ellie, can't imagine how many ties that album severed

    elliessmokeyeye: Reply to carissaandher_h0ttakes╰┈➤I think about this all the time! She was literally the god mother for Dina and Jesses kid

     carissaandher_h0ttakes: Reply to elliessmokeyeye╰┈➤it make me think that she might've done something to them to make them hate her the way Ellie does, Ellie did say that she didn't write all of the songs for Smokey Eyes 🤔🤔🤔

"Do you see how this backlash doesn't look good for anyone?" My agent, Caroline asks after showing me several Twitter posts that are under the trending tag.

"Well, it's not really my fault."

"Nonetheless, I think It's time for a rebrand." She sets her phone face down and looks at me from across her desk "Do you remember when you went on tour with the Ashmen when you were around twenty-one?"

My eyes go wide, I'm already shaking my head "Please-

"This is an awful event that you can turn into an amazing opportunity and capitalize on it," The backdrop behind Caroline is almost blinding, it's an annoyingly hot LA day and I want nothing more than to be back in Canada and swimming in lakes with my little sister.

"Caroline, mentally I can't handle a tour with Ellie."

"Mentally, you're gonna have to," She says, getting stern "Your fans either hate each other or they love both of you and feel like their parents have divorced."

I know that I will argue with Caroline for the next hour and threaten to fire her but eventually, she will win, so until then I am preoccupied with thoughts of everything but Ellie, soaking in the last moments I will have until she envelopes my brain and suffocates me from the inside out.

I am sure that with Ellie, I will die before winter comes and I am doubtful that I will ever bloom again.

[evera-era]

heal me. (pt 3)

ellie williams x f!reader pt 1, pt 2

warnings: nervous/cutesy ellie, fluff, yearning, eventual kissing !!

a/n: no mentions of medic stuff this time bc i wanted reader to enjoy life outside of that. also i’m sorry for putting this off, i just wasn’t sure how i felt ab it </3 but here’s the final part !!

“Wow… you really do have the whole collection.” You murmur, lightly grazing your fingertips over the spines of Ellie’s comics.

It was the first time you had been to her house. Well… garage. She wasn’t exactly proud of it either, but it was homely.

“Pretty cool, huh?” She says, watching you. “I’ve probably read it about a dozen times already.”

You smiled, turning and looking at her over your shoulder. She shifts on her bed.

“Didn’t know you were a geek.”

“A- A geek?” She stutters, raising her eyebrows. “Wow, okay. Ouch.”

You both laughed, and you bit down on your lip. “It’s not a bad thing. Geeks are cute.”

You turned to look back at her bookshelf as Ellie’s face flushes. She knew you were flirting with her — it was obvious you were flirting with her — but she didn’t know what to do next.

“Mind if I read the second one while I’m here?” You ask, pulling the sandwiched comic out of its spot.

“Go for it,” She says, pulling her converse off her feet. “You can come sit over here. I mean — if, if you want.”

You grinned, spinning on your heel before plopping yourself on her bed. It was soft, and surprisingly comfy.

“Hey, this isn’t fair.”

“What?” She says, eyes widening.

“Your bed. It’s so nice,” You comment, looking up at her. “How do you just casually have the best bed, like, ever?”

The redhead laughs. “That’s a bit of an exaggeration.”

“I’m not even kidding,” You sigh. “God. I could sleep here forever.”

As you turn the page and begin reading, Ellie can’t help but look over at you. You were inches away from her, on her bed, in her bedroom. And you said you wanted to sleep next to her. It felt surreal.

She swears she could probably die happy right about now.

About ten minutes pass, and Ellie clears her throat. “So, uh, how are you liking it so far?”

“It’s really good,” You say, still holding the book up. “I think I could get into this series… if you’ll let me, of course.”

“Y-Yeah,” She says quickly. “Yeah, of course. Uh, whenever you want.”

You smiled gently before looking over at her.

“Hey, Ellie?”

“Uh-huh?”

“Do you have a girlfriend?” You ask. “Or… boyfriend? Sorry. Should’ve asked.”

Her eyes nearly pop out of her head. “G-Girlfriend. And uh, no, not currently.”

“So you’re seeing someone?” You question.

“No— No, sorry. I meant… that I don’t have a girlfriend.”

“Oh.” You say simply, before returning to the comic. Her head swarms as she tries to figure out your intentions.

Was that was your way of telling her you liked her? Shit, or were you just being friendly? She couldn’t tell. She didn’t wanna read into it wrong.

A few more minutes pass as she looks down at you. “Um… and you?”

“Huh?” You say, looking up from the book. “Me?”

“Y-Yeah. Do… you have someone?”

“No,” You say. “I’d be surprised if anyone even liked me. I mean… I’m not all that. But you? You get to go on patrol and look all badass and stuff.”

Ellie blushes, looking down at the ground. “You— you look good, too. Better. I meant… better.”

She wants to kick herself. Why does she sound so stupid when she wants to flirt back?

Nonetheless, you took the compliment with a smile. “Thanks, Ellie.”

Ellie gives a thin-lipped smile, desperately hoping she was better at putting her thoughts into words. And that she wasn’t a total dork.

The two of you had spent the next few hours in her room. The sun slowly began to lower in the sky, painting her window blinds a pale shade of gray. You had gone through two comics at most, as you had spent half of your time speaking to her instead of actually reading.

“Alright,” You nudged her knee. “It’s your turn to tell me a story.”

“Alright, alright.” She pauses. “I have a good one. It’s about my friend Jesse.”

“Okay. Shoot,” You reply, looking up at her.

You realized that you enjoyed watching her. More than anyone you had ever met.

There was a sparkle she got in her eyes when she was excited about something, and her nose would scrunch whenever she described something she didn’t like. It was cute and adorable and god, you wanted more of her.

“…And so while me and Dina were sledding, he slips and absolutely busts his ass.” At this point, Ellie’s smiling, making grand hand gestures as she explains.

“I’m talkin’ full on, face first into the fucking snow! It was hilarious, and—“

She notices your staring, and immediately clears her throat. “Uh... are— are you okay?”

“Yeah,” You say, pushing yourself up from the position you were laying in. You scoot closer, so you’re hovering over her face.

“Can I kiss you?” You ask, looking into her eyes. When you’re met with silence, you close your eyes, mentally scolding yourself.

“Sorry… was that awkward?” You cover your face with your hands. “That was awkward, wasn’t it? N-Nevermind. I swear I was listening—“

For a moment, you were worried that maybe you had come on too strong. That just as you began to make a new friend, you had pushed her away, in a rather embarrassing manner. But your fears dissipate when you feel the warmth of her hands on yours.

She peels your hands away from your face, holding them gently. Her fingers were nimble, and rather coarse, but her touch is near electrifying.

“Please,” She whispers, barely audible. And before you have the chance to lean in, her lips have already hit yours.

Ellie’s kiss is desperate; it was something she had been wanting to do since she had first met you. And inside, she’s ecstatic, because she never thought you’d ask her to.

Her lips are warm, and encompassing, and her breath is shallow against your face. She goes slowly as to burn this memory into her brain.

When the two of you pull away, it’s quiet. You were worried if maybe you had changed the dynamic too quickly, but then she speaks.

“I… I really wanted that.” She says softly. You smile, nodding.

“Yeah. Me too.”

You turn your head away in an attempt to ease the fluttering in your chest. Ellie’s eyes are still on you, and she reaches out to brush a stray piece of hair away from your neck.

Your eyes land on the comic cover, and you laugh halfheartedly.

“I, um, barely finished it.” You utter. “The book.”

“Oh,” She says, raising her brows. “You… you can take some more with you, if you want. So you can read them.”

You shrug, looking back over at her.

“Or maybe I can just come back over here.” You add. “So I can read them with you?”

Ellie’s heart skips a beat, and she quickly nods. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s— great.”

You got up from her bed, putting the comics back. When you turn around, you press your lips together, looking off to the side.

“One condition, though.”

“Hm?” She says, looking back over at you.

“I come over as your girlfriend… not your friend.” You say shyly. “It’s my only rule.”

Ellie grins, standing up from the bed as well. She approaches you slowly.

“Well… you’re leaving as my girlfriend… aren’t you?”

“Am I?” You smile coyly, putting your arms around her neck. “This your way of asking me out?”

Ellie nods, face flushed. She thought it was cute, and a little funny, that you had casually assumed she went around kissing people she wasn’t into. She considered herself way too much of a loser to accomplish something like that.

You giggle a bit.

“Okay, then. Yeah, I’ll be your girlfriend.”

Her girlfriend. Her girl. Ellie can’t help but feel fuzzy at the thought of it.

It sounded good — it sounded right, rolling off of your tongue. She truly couldn’t wait to have you around her arm, walking with you around town.

Ellie doesn’t say anything else, merely smiles bashfully as you lean in to kiss her again.

And even though she couldn’t be sure of the future, she’s sure that in this moment, she wouldn’t wanna be with anyone else besides you.

[whore-era]

affinity - part 2

ellie williams x fem!reader

themes: angst, pining, best friends, unrequited love, love triangle

summary: after drunkenly confessing your love to your best friend of five years, you try to move on from her, but your best friend has other plans in mind.

a/n: i think this one is horrible, not my best writing, but the words were just flowin outtttt. this is also very dialogue heavy so my apologies if yall arent into that

word count: 4,204

2/3 | affinity - pt 1

taglist: @sawaagyapong @katiemars @friiida-xx @elorawrites @eringaitskill @helaenaswife @3lliesrifle @elliesconverses @koolguysyndrome @muthafuckingstargirl @whteflwcrs @j-money777 @jolieetoile @elliewilliamsmunch @frasersgf @rumirim @siesie2 @starhrtz @mcu-junkie @yookayyo @viswifetotallyreal @franreadss @catostrophiclesbian @parkersmyth @tweecunt @ilovebasketball3333 @bigmoodyjoody @silhxvette

was i in heaven?

the question pops into your brain, as you truly thought you’d be dead in a ditch after the number of drinks you had last night. you made a mental note to thank dina later today for putting an end to your drunken endeavors from the night before. 

blinking your eyes open, your eyesight adjusting to your surroundings, you realize you are not in your own home at all. you’re at ellie’s, familiarizing yourself with her bedspread and decor. you sit up, wincing and holding your head, the pain throbbing in your skull at the sudden movement. 

sitting up properly, you scan your surroundings and your eyes stop at the sleeping figure on the couch. ellie was fast asleep on the cushions with a thin blanket covering her body, chest rising and falling at every gentle breath. 

in the past, you and ellie would have no issue sharing a bed and sleeping together, as you’ve both done it a thousand times before. you’d usually wake up first, and spend the morning staring at ellie sleeping, which you were thankful she never caught you doing or else she’d never let it go. you were always enticed by the way she looked while sleeping, she was out of her element and relaxed — different from her usual reckless personality.

now, ellie slept separately from you and you could only assume it was because of her new relationship with cat. closing your eyes and recounting the events from the day before, you shook off the tears forming in your eyes. god, so much for trying to forget about her. 

standing up quietly, careful not to wake her up, you pull on your shoes and make your way towards the door, opening it slowly and exiting from her shed before gently closing it again. you let out a sigh of relief, beginning the walk back to your own house. shading your eyes away from the rising sun to decrease the intensity of your pounding headache, you lay out your plans for the day.

okay, so i definitely have to shower ‘cause i reek of booze, and then i have to get ready for patrol in an hour, and then- you stop in your tracks, remembering you had patrol today, patrol with ellie. smacking a hand over your forehead, you make a note to stop by the tipsy bison to talk to maria about switching partners.

making it to your house within minutes, you rush to the bathroom and peel your clothes off to shower. the feeling of the warm water hitting your skin and relaxing your muscles was incomparable. it was a small slice of self-care you look forward to every day, as privileges like showers during an apocalypse was something hard to come by. 

cleansing the grime off your body, you step out of the shower and pull on some clothes for patrol — a long sleeve, jeans, a thick jacket, and a beanie. pulling on your boots and slinging on your backpack, you head out your door, remembering your keys this time, and make a beeline toward the bar. 

jackson early in the morning was something you’ve grown to love when heading out for patrol. the way the rising sun peeked over the edge of the trees, waking up the rest of the town, it always set a positive tone for your day. it was certainly one of the second-best things about this town, number one being a girl named ellie williams.

entering the bar, the bell tinkling as you opened the door, maria turns and smiles once she sees it’s you.

“just the girl i was looking forward to seeing,” maria greets, holding her broom in one hand and holding out one arm. you smile and give maria a side hug, “g’morning,” you mumble.

“so, how was last night?” the older woman queries, and you let out a groan of embarrassment. 

“don’t even remind me,” you beg, “i don’t wanna think about that at all, i’m still dealing with the consequences.” you rub your head, the throbbing still present. 

“well, it certainly was a sight for sore eyes,” maria chuckles, “anyways, don’t you have patrol in—” she pauses to check her wristwatch, “thirty minutes?” 

you nod, “that’s actually what i wanted to talk to you about.”

“uh, oh. this can’t be good.” 

“i just want to switch partners. please. put me with anyone. anyone but, ellie.”

maria sighed, “why? i mean, i’ll do it for you, but why?” 

“i just don’t think i can be around her anymore. ellie’s my best friend, well was, and i don’t wanna get in the way of anything,” you say, choking back tears, attempting to distract yourself by fiddling with a loose thread on the hem of your shirt. 

the older woman peered her eyes at you, thinking for a moment before speaking again. “okay, fine. you can be partnered up with jesse and ellie with dina.” 

you let out a breath of relief, “thank you, maria. i owe yo-“

“on one condition.”

you narrow your eyes at her, suspicious of what her condition entailed, “….okay.”

“try talking to ethan. i think you both would be good together.” 

“ethan? the stableboy?” 

maria nods, “yup. talked to him yesterday and he may or may not have a small crush on you. poor kid was blabbering on about how badass and brave you are for going on patrol and all that shit, and that you’re real pretty doing it all.”

you let out a laugh, cheeks flushing red, “okay, sure. i’ll— uh— give him a chance.” 

bidding maria goodbye and heading towards the front gates for patrol, you couldn’t help but think of what she said. ethan? the shy stableboy? crushing on you? you were flattered to say the least.

shaking your thoughts off, you make it to the stables and walk over to sunshine. ethan was already there, securing her saddles and brushing her brown coat. 

“good morning,” you greet, approaching him. he lifts his head up in surprise, a smile settling on his face once he realizes it's you. 

“oh hey, good morning,” he says in a sweet voice, “she’ll be ready in a few, just getting her all ready for you.” 

“no, no— uh— take your time,” you sputter out, “i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to rush you or anything. just wanted to say hi.” 

what the hell was this? the 5th grade? why did you suddenly feel nervous talking to this guy? ethan smiles at you, a dimple poking out from his cheek. was that always there? 

“no worries,” he says coolly, “i’m glad you came over here. was hoping to see off the prettiest girl in jackson.”

your cheeks are warm and your face is red. is it getting hot in here? 

from the corner of your eye, you see jesse, giving you the perfect excuse to escape from ethan to calm down a bit. 

“i’ll be right back, i-i just need to talk to jesse.” you walk off quickly before he had the chance to see the tomato that was your face. 

approaching jesse, you poke him on the back and he quickly turns around, preparing to sucker-punch the person who dares sneak up on him from behind. 

“well, if it isn’t the little monster.” he gives you a cheeky smile, letting his fists fall down at his sides. 

you roll your eyes, “please, i don’t even wanna know how you came up with that nickname,” you breathe out, “anyways, we’re patrol partners now.”

“says who?”

“says me.”

jesse rolls his eyes as you let out a laugh, and joel and tommy gather the rest of the group to make some announcements and set the agenda for the day. from your peripheral, you see ellie appear a few feet away from you, adjusting her jacket and backpack. she probably overslept, evident from her disheveled clothes and her hurried state. 

the two brothers dismiss everyone to leave for patrol, and you see ethan walking towards you with sunshine. he hands you her leads, brushing his hands against yours. 

“see you after patrol?” he asks smiling at you, his dimple popping out again as he tilts his head to the side a bit. how cute.

“yeah, definitely,” you smile and he nods, putting his hands in his pockets and walking back toward the stables. when he disappears from your view, you see dina speaking to ellie, causing her to turn and look your way.

you quickly turn away, praying she didn’t catch you staring. as you and jesse leave for patrol, you couldn’t help the forming pit in your stomach, hoping that you made the right decision. 

that’s how the next three days went. you avoided talking to ellie, you talked to ethan at the stables, and you spent your time patrolling with jesse, which was mayhem in itself, but you tried to focus on the upside of it all.

however, ellie was growing annoyed by the second, fed up with you doing everything in your power to avoid her. 

“it’s like we weren’t best friends for years!” ellie vented out, the sound of the snow crunching beneath her boots as she strolled alongside dina, giving the horses a break.

“granted, she was in love with you for almost the entire duration of your friendship,” dina commented. 

ellie glared at her, “yea, but still— she could’ve talked to me or some shit. instead, she ignores me.” 

deep down inside, ellie felt guilty. blaming everything on herself for how things turned out. even though you never did admit your feelings directly, while sober, she should’ve seen the signs. ellie could only imagine how you felt— constantly having the person you loved for years telling you about their own romantic pursuits. it made sense why you took off the day she told you she was planning to ask cat to be her girlfriend, you were hurt. 

“it’s fine, ellie,” dina attempts to reassure, “besides, i’m sure she’ll be over it by the end of the week.”

“wait— what do you mean?” ellie stopped walking, hanging onto every word that dina was saying. 

“well- you know- um,” the darker-haired brunette stutters, “how would you feel seeing her with someone else?”

fire ignited in ellie’s veins, anger flowing through every vessel in her body. what the fuck? was this your solution? using some other person to get over your feelings for her? were you actually fucking serious?

“what are you saying, dina?” her fists begin to ball up, restraining the urge to punch a nearby tree trunk. 

dina’s eyes widened, realizing there was no hiding the secret now as ellie would’ve definitely found out sooner or later. ellie was perceptive and persistent, and would’ve bugged everybody in town if it meant finding out the truth about someone making plans to date you. 

“so, this is a funny story,” dina laughs nervously, “a little birdie told me that they set one of the stable boys up with her.” 

if you squinted your eyes and looked close enough, you could see the smoke coming out from ellie’s ears. she was infuriated. 

“who?”

“ethan.” 

“christ! fuckin’ ethan?” ellie yelled out in frustration, dina in the background grimacing from the sudden increase of volume in her tone.

“keep it down, will you? you’re gonna attract every clicker within a five-mile radius,” dina snapped, gaining another glare from those green eyes. 

“ugh,” ellie groaned, “this is a mess.”

“why does it even matter? you’re with cat, doesn’t this make everything easier actually?” dina asks, “the possibility of her being with someone else?”

ellie’s chest tightened. the very idea of you being with someone stirred something inside her guts. maybe it was the thought of them seeing your smile every day that made her sick to her stomach, or seeing you laugh til’ your belly hurt when you watched your favorite 90’s sitcom shows on VHS. it could also be the notion of someone holding you close when you watch the first edition of ‘nightmare on elm street’ because you get terrified every time you watch it that made her want to puke or — was it thinking about someone seeing the intimate parts of your body that did it instead?

“i-i don’t know, okay?” ellie says, “and, i’m not with cat.” she clarifies, hoisting herself back onto shimmer’s saddle. 

“huh? but didn’t you tell-” 

“i know what i said, but i’m not with cat.” ellie cuts dina off before she had a chance to interject again, “it’s time to head back. c’mon.” 

the journey back to jackson was painful for ellie, for she wanted nothing more than to see you and talk to you. every minute she was apart from you, she imagined ethan trying to win you over, swooning you with his corny jokes and suave pick-up lines. god, she was gonna be nauseous if she thought about that horse-boy one more time. 

making it back in due time, ellie and dina entered through the tall, wooden gates. ellie was quick on her feet and rushed off to find you, seeing that you were already back from patrol and that you were walking into the garden — your favorite path to cut through. 

ellie calls you out by your name, making you turn around but once you recognized who was calling for you, you cursed under your breath and walked faster. 

“hey!” ellie yells out, “i need to talk to you!” 

your feet pick up the pace, angering her even more. just as you were about to pass the bushels of purple hydrangeas, you felt a hand yank onto yours.

“stop runnin’ away from me! will you?” ellie breathes out, winded from having to chase after you. 

“sorry— i, uh—” you weren’t sure what to say, “i just had a long day.” 

ellie stares at you for a moment, “bullshit. why the hell do you keep fucking avoiding me?” 

you took your bottom lip between your teeth, a telltale sign of your anxiety forming, and if you didn’t look so damn gorgeous doing that surrounded by all the flowers, ellie swore she would’ve fallen to her knees and begged for your forgiveness right then and there. 

“i just— i made a decision that was necessary for our friendship.” 

you couldn’t look her in the eyes, knowing all the feelings you’ve managed to push to the back of your brain would come flooding back and the butterflies would flutter about in your belly again and your heart would pick up like you just finished laps around a football field.

“so, that’s it?” ellie’s voice is laced with bitterness, “we just forget about those five years?”

you stay silent, eyes focusing on the layer of snow covering the ground beneath your feet.

“you know, you can’t just fucking tell someone you’re in love with them and— and never speak to them again!” 

your ears perked up, “what are you talking about?” 

“that night,” ellie walks closer to you, “that night you were drunk, you told me you were in love with me.” 

fear settles into your body and you didn’t know what to say at that point. 

“that’s why i never went through with it. asking cat to be my girlfriend.”

you drag your eyes up, looking at her, and your brows draw together in confusion, “why not?” 

now it was ellie’s turn to be tongue-tied, “i-i don’t kno—wait, this isn’t about me!”

“what is this even about, els?” the way the nickname you had for her rolled off your tongue was enough to turn ellie williams into a puddle. it was unorthodox how ellie’s body reacted to every single thing you did, did this always happen or did she just now notice this?

“so, it’s true then? you’re in love with me?”

you hesitated before responding, unsure how she would react to your answer, “it doesn’t matter.”

“why not?”

“because my feelings don’t— they don’t matter,” you reply, irritation growing apparent in your tone, “what matters to me is that you’re alive and healthy and happy, even if it means you being with someone else.” 

ellie’s chest felt like it weighed 500 tons. she didn’t know what to do. she wanted to cry, she wanted to envelop you in her arms, she wanted to brush the hair from your face and hold your cheeks in her hands, she wanted to yell at you and tell you that your feelings were just as important and that your wellbeing mattered too.

but she stayed put, allowing her emotions to get the best of her. 

“and what about you? are you happy with ethan, huh? does he make you happy?” a devious smirk creeping on her face with a subtle mocking inflection in her words. 

“that’s not fair, ellie—” 

how she fucking hated it when you said her full name. to you, she was els. your els. 

“how?!” 

“becaus—” you were about to rip one into her, releasing your true, unearthed feelings that were bottled up over five years, but you felt your hand knock into someone’s nose as you had this horrid habit of talking with your hands when you were extremely emotional. 

“auggghh!” ethan groaned out in pain, holding his nose in agony. 

“oh my god! ethan!” you rush over to him, putting your hands on his face to get a look at the damage. streams of crimson flowed down his nostrils, dripping down to his shirt. 

“i’m so sorry!” you apologized, and the boy attempted to smile but cringed instead. 

ellie rolled her eyes, “no, she’s not.” she muttered, only loud enough for you to hear, inciting a glare from you.

“don’t worry about it. it’s fine,” ethan said, his voice sounding congested, “i should’ve made myself known before approaching you, but i came here because i wanted to ask you to dinner tonight— with me, at the diner.” 

ellie watched the smile grow on your face and the faded pink fan across your cheeks, and suddenly the world went silent, your lips mouthing the words ‘yes’. watching you wrap your arms around ethan and guiding him towards the infirmary, ellie couldn’t help the lump forming in the back of her throat — wishing it was her taking you out to dinner instead. but she had to stand back and watch you with someone else, a habit you knew all too well. 

- 

ellie williams never considered herself a heavy drinker. she was more of a social drinker at most, only drinking one or two beers maximum when there were the usual parties and get-togethers in town. but when you force yourself to watch the girl you love laugh at some smelly horse-boy’s jokes, you needed all the alcohol you can get.

hearing your laugh resonate through the air, ellie took another swig of bourbon, the spicy liquor burning her throat. 

“what the fuck could he be saying that’s so funny? huh?” ellie spat, the glass banging on the table, provoking a flinch from jesse and dina. 

“well, he’s actually kind of—” dina’s cut off by the incandescent scowl from her penetrating green eyes, “yea, no, he’s terrible.”

ellie’s head couldn’t grasp what you saw in ethan. were you attracted to his looks? he’s a 6.5 at best, is 5’6, and he’s slim. he’s also nice and friendly. but surely, ellie was better. 

she knew she was more attractive, at 5’7 with a fit physique from all those hours training in combat and getting in her workout during patrol. she also was kind, funny, and intelligent. however, ellie knew she would be better for you than ethan. she knew you like the back of her hand, she could protect you far better than he could if a situation were to arise, and she could make you feel good, in more ways than one. 

which is why when she spotted you and ethan preparing to leave, she knew this was her opportunity to get you alone, and also to cock-block him so he doesn’t end up trying to make a move and kiss you — an idea that immediately made her see red.

“where you goin’ this time?” jesse asks, noticing ellie stand up, taking one last gulp of that liquid courage.

“to get my girl back.” 

jesse and dina looked at each other, mouthing a quiet ‘finally’ as ellie marched out the door, hoping she could catch up to you and horse-boy. 

spotting you and ethan strolling down the trail, she catches sight of ethan’s hand trailing up to the small of your back. 

do not fucking touch her.

ellie calls out your name, causing you and ethan to turn around and stop in their tracks. slowly jogging towards you, “hey, can i talk to you?” she breathes out, winded from her slow run, “alone.”

“um, sure.”

ellie glares at ethan, and as ethan prepares to but in, insisting he can stay nearby, your hand gently touches his arm, “i’ll see you tomorrow bright and early before i leave for patrol. okay?” 

ethan reluctantly nods, “okay,” and he leans in to peck your cheek, “goodnight.” he gives ellie one last look, throwing a smirk her way before he leaves the two of you alone.

god, ellie never wanted to beat someone’s ass so badly.

her anger quickly falters once she glances at you again, looking beautiful as ever in your beanie and scarf with your cheeks all red and rosy from the chilly air. 

you clear your throat, snapping her out of her thoughts. “here, i’ll— uh— walk you home.” 

as you both begin your slow stroll, the tension is awkward and silent. you both didn’t know what to say. after a couple minutes of walking in this god-awful silence, ellie speaks up first, “so. how’s it going with ethan?”

“ellie, please. if you’re trying to be sarcastic—”

“no, no, i’m not,” ellie scratches the back of her neck, “i’m seriously asking. not trying to be a smartass or start an argument or anything.” 

you let out a heavy sigh, “he’s nice…and he’s friendly.” you weren’t sure what else to say about him. you didn’t know him that well yet and you didn’t want to admit to her that you didn’t think he was all that cute anyways, despite the dimple.

“yeah? you like him?” 

silence filled the air. you wanted to be careful with what you were going to say next, but ellie had a way to make you feel comfortable enough to open up about things you didn’t want to talk about. it was easy to talk to her because you knew she was actually listening. 

“it’s not that easy to get over you, you know?” you murmur quietly, but you could tell ellie picked up on what you said. “i feel guilty for— i guess using him as a rebound, to get over what i felt for you.”

“what did you feel for me?” 

you scoff, “seriously, els? you’re gonna make me say it?” ellie couldn’t help but smile at the way her nickname sounded leaving your lips. “i had a lot of feelings for you. i mean— we were best friends and you were on my mind all the time. you made my head hurt when i thought about you too much and when i was around you i got those cheesy butterflies in my stomach that people in the movies talk about.” you couldn’t help the small smile that mindlessly crept on your lips when you talked about this, and ellie couldn’t help but feel dumb for not realizing how she felt sooner. 

“why didn’t you ever say anything?” 

you shrugged, “i didn’t want to jeopardize our friendship and lose you. our friendship meant the world to me,” you looked down, fiddling with your shirt again as anxiety built up inside you, “and besides, it seemed like you never saw me anything more than a friend. i was never gonna be that girl. it was always someone else.” 

ellie’s thoughts were running rampant, wanting to say all these things to you and tell you that you were wrong and that you are the girl for her. she wanted to beg on her knees and say she was sorry that she didn’t realize how she felt sooner, and that she was only using other girls to compensate for the fact that she couldn’t have you. but nothing came out. 

approaching the front door, you take your key out from your jean pocket. “well, goodnight, els. i’ll see you tomorrow?”

once more, everything in the world went quiet and all ellie saw was you. you were standing in front of her, so clearly. the small details of your face illuminated by the soft glow of the porch light made you look like an angel sent from above. ellie knew she didn’t deserve you, after everything you’ve been through, after all the hurt she caused for you; but she was dumb if she thought she going to let you go so easily. ellie had to fight for you and she didn’t give a fuck who was in her way.

in one, swift move, ellie wrapped her arms around your waist, pulling you in to press her lips against yours.

affinity - part 3 here

[sevikaskittygf]

good luck, babe! [e.w x fem!reader.]

chapter one.

author's note!<3 - this is inspired by chappell roan's unreleased song good luck, babe! i lllloooovveee chappell roan! this was originally going to be just a LONG ASS one-shot but i don't think i can write any more tonight 😭😭 . BUT I REALLY WANNA PUBLISH IT SO HOPEFULLY YOU GUYS LIKE IT!!!! also forgive me if there's any grammar/spelling errors... i'm posting this at 12:59 am🥶🥶🥶🥶🥶 . reblogs and comments are SO appreciated!!! i busted my ass for y'all 🤗 .

content warnings - SLIGHT angst, reader has internalized homophobia and is outright homophobic to ellie, reader is in the closet, ellie is a lovergirl and she's going through the five stages of grief, modern!au, reader gets sexually assaulted/harrassed, LET ME KNOW IF I MISSED ANYTHING ELSE!!!!

special thanks to!!!!: @sharkfemme and @dykedearest FOR HELPING ME OUT!!!!!! and also LYNN AND MAXIM!!! ALL FOUR OF YOU ARE AMAZING BETA READERS I'M KISSING YOU ALL THROUGH THE PHONE RN!!!

------------------------------------------------------------

it's fine, it's cool.

ellie's grip on her glass got impossibly tighter as her eyes never left your figure, your body swaying to whatever shitty mainstream pop music that was playing.

ellie williams hated secrets. she hated surprises, and she hated being in love with you.

she hated the way you would ghost her after spending a week at her apartment. she hated the way you would stop responding to her texts after you would leave. she hated the way she would let you back in when you needed her, she hated how much she loved to comfort you. she hated how gentle you were when it was just the two of you, compared to how cruel you got in public.

you can say that we ain't nothin' when you know the truth.

ellie took her hand off the glass and gripped the bar table instead, afraid that if she broke another glass she'd be banned from the bar.

you were like forbidden fruit to her, or maybe that was what she was to you.

she knew you weren't ready to come out of the closet. she understood that. so, why keep on playing this fucking game with her?

why did she even still feed into it?

i guess i'm, the fool.

the closet was made out of glass, really. you would stare at every woman's body that passed you, your eyes would scan up their short dress, she could see the curiosity and desire in your face.

but every single time after you two would hook up, there was always a new excuse.

"i'm not a fucking lesbian, ellie. i just... don't like men sometimes." sometimes?

"they're just stupid thoughts... it's not like i could ever be with a woman." but you had been. you had been with her.

"ok but... do you even count as a woman? you wear boxers, you don't even know the meaning of the term ladylike and... i don't know- look at your fuckin' hair! the closest you'd get is a transwoman." that one had hurt her. she didn't talk to you for a month after you made that comment. and then you appeared in her apartment complex hallway, sobbing hysterically.

and of course, she took you back.

like she always does.

with her arms out like an angel, through the car sun-roof.

she hated playing this fucking game with you. it was killing her.

every single time she'd see you at this bar, she imagined you dragging her onto the dancefloor. she imagined being able to walk out with your hand in her's, waking up to your groggy groans when the sun invaded the sacred space of your shared bedroom, you'd hide your face in her neck, mumbling something about, "shouldn't have drank that much last night."

every single time you pulled this shit on her, it felt like her already shattered heart broke off into impossibly tinier pieces.

"i wish you were a boy." crack.

"it's not easy for me like it is for you, els. i don't know the first thing about being proud of myself." crack.

"this hurts me more than you, baby." shattered. her heart was shattered.

it hurts you more than her?

the fucking audacity.

the nights she spent crying next to your sleeping figure.

the hours she'd spent texting you and checking her phone second after second after goddamn second.

the way she would ignore every single obligation she had to pick you up from whatever shit-hole situation you had found yourself in, immediately and happily dropping anything to make sure you were ok.

and it hurt you more than it hurt her?

you didn't know shit about hurt. about misery. about love.

i don't wanna cut it off!

her friends had told her to cut you off. her therapist said in his own professional shrink way that you would never be good for her. at least not while you weren't even good for yourself.

but she couldn't let you go. it seemed like every reason that she had to leave you, fuelled her determination to stay.

but you don't wanna call it love!

every single time you somehow broke her heart in a new way, she fell harder in love with you.

you just wanna love someone that calls you baby!-

ellie was pulled out of her internal anger when your eyes met hers. although it was only a few seconds ago, it felt like she was staring into your eyes for an eternity.

don't fuckin' wave, ellie. look away- LOOK AWAY. , she thought to herself as she was unable to look away from your beautiful irises.

you had this slight smile on your face, the dancefloor's led lights adding a shimmer to your already twinkling eyes.

it felt like her melancholy thoughts had lifted and increased all at the same time by the sight of you acknowledging her presence.

ellie went against her better judgement, her slender hand flying up to wave at you. her lips quirked upwards gently as she scanned your delighted face.

your light expression quickly turned into one of frustration, suppressing your grin with a tightening of your lips before pulling the nearest man close to you in for an unexpected kiss, opening your eyes once you knew the mystery man's were closed, locking your eyes onto ellie's before closing them once more.

the light had died in ellie's stomach after that. her happy hand that was raised in the air faltered painfully back to her side as she watched the man's hands roam down from your sides... to your waist... to your ass.

you can kiss a hundred boys in bars,

those butterflies that she had just felt in her tummy had died slowly, turning into knots of anguish.

she watched your hands cradle the man's face. those same hands that had counted each and every freckle on her face on a snowy morning that had you both stranded in her apartment.

those same hands that had a death-grip on her back as you sobbed into her shoulder every other weeknight as she tried to muffle her own cries.

those same hands that had shoved her violently as she finally tried to stand her ground one afternoon you showed up knocking on her door. "you know what... fuck you, ellie! i don't know why i keep on doing this shit with you anyways." you said, before storming off. you called her later that night. she answered. "i'm sorry, els. i'm sorry, i'll do better, i'm so sorry-" , "it's ok, baby. it's ok. i know you didn't mean it. you're ok baby, i forgive you."

shoot another shot, try to stop the feeling!

she would've stayed in that seat, stewed in her anger for a bit more before the tears inevitably came falling down if it wasn't for the way the dude's hands creeped under your skin-tight jeans and how you flinched away from his grasp, breaking the kiss immediately with a nervous giggle creeping up.

the guy obviously took it as an invitation to do more, placing his hand back on your waist and agressively pulling you closer.

you can say it's just the way you are,

ellie's head tilted as she watched this go down.

what she wanted to do was launch that creep into the nearest wall and make sure he never tainted your body again. but she didn't want to get up too soon, she wanted to be certain that you needed help, whether you wanted it or not.

your hand stopped him from coming any closer, placing it right before his chest. you said something along the lines of, "don't want to do anything." .

make a new excuse, another stupid reason-

instead of him being a decent human being and leaving you alone, his face quickly turned into one of anger. his jaw jutted out as he tried to pull you in again, leaving you thrashing against his body.

how was no one else seeing this? why was no one else doing anything?!

she didn't even have time to process what she was about to do. her feet were on the ground, marching their way towards you before she could even think about her course of action in a smart way.

"let me go, fuckin' creep!" she heard you shriek as she grew closer to you, attempting to elbow him in the chest.

ellie felt like no matter how fast she was walking, she would never make it to you in time.

he laughed tauntingly as he grinded against. "i'm the creep, bitch?! you kissed me f-"

his last word was stolen from him as ellie forcefully pushed him off you with and landed a blow against his nose.

he groaned in pain, falling to the ground as he cradled his now-broken-nose.

you gasped in shock and horror. "what the fuck, ellie?!" you scolded her. as if you would've been fine on your own.

she ignored your words though, pulling the guy's hand away as she forced another punch to his face.

now people were finally looking.

she didn't stop until she felt your hands on her stomach, pulling her away from the scene.

"she fuckin'... said... no!..." ellie's voice thundered, erratic breaths in between her words before bringing one last painful kick to his face before letting you lead her out of the bar and into the night air.

you didn't stop even after you two were at the entrance door of the establishment, you made sure the two of you were far enough away that ellie wouldn't be caught if the police were called.

she couldn't help but feel those stupid fucking butterflies again as your hand gripped hers and felt a little disappointed when you dropped it, suddenly all too aware that you were still in public.

her green eyes met your own, yours filled with anger and chaos... hers filled with love.

"hey, swan." the auburnette sighed out simply, that stupid love-grin back on her face as she was finally close to you.

your eyebrows furrowed in disbelief as your hands went to massage your temples. you let out a humorless giggle. "you're so... fucking stupid, ellie!" you exclaimed, shoving her chest as if she was in the wrong.

her grin turned into a confused frown as she surrendered her hands in the air, her eyebrows mirroring your own now. "wh-wh....what-"

good luck, babe!

"god, you have this severe goddamn saviour complex or some shit!... i was fine! i was fucking fine on my own before you marched in and assaulted that guy."

well good luck, babe!

you gaslighted beautifully, defending the man you knew nothing about over the woman who was fatally in love with you, she almost believed you.

ellie's frown turned into an angry smile as she brought a hand to gently wipe over the bridge of her nose, a mannerism of her's she had developed whenever she got frustrated with you.

"assau-... ok, sure-... you wanna talk about assault, baby? that fuckin' guy would've assaulted you if i didn't step in. he was assaul-"

you shut your eyes tightly the way you do when you wanted to block something out that ellie was obviously right about. you shook your head stubbornly. "gggoddd ellie- it was my fault! i wanted it and then i didn't. i shouldn't have- i shouldn't have kissed him in the first place. i gave him mixed signals, i-"

you'd have to stop the world just to stop the feeling!-

your eyebrows grew dangerously closer to your face as you cradled your head in your hands.

ellie was quick to walk right back to you, caressing your arms.

"what? baby, no. no, it's not your fault... that- that fuckin' guy... hey... look at me, sweetheart." she cooed lovingly.

good luck, babe!

you slowly brought your hands away from your face, meeting her breathtaking green eyes.

you wanted to fall into her arms, you wanted to thank her for coming to your rescue and kiss her and confess to her how scared you truly were.

but you didn't. you never did.

your slightly calm expression that came over you once you met your secret lover's gaze turned into one of annoyance. ellie was, like always, taken by surprise as you thrashed against her grip, just like the way you did with that monster in the bar.

good luck, babe!

ellie's eyes blurred with tears as she watched your face turn into a grimace.

"fuck you, ellie." you said quietly as you broke free from her hands, storming off into the night. leaving her. like always.

you'd have to stop the world just to stop the feeling.

[olive-fics]

can we reverse uno your loser abby and see some loser reader. i always think about what modern abby and i would be like in the stories here and honestly lmfao, i'd be hiding in my college dorm playing botw ft'ing ellie and she would be the concerned RA that wonders why i never leave my room and sit in the dark all day. on a good day i think we'd parallel percy and annabeth

Oh my gosh YES. I'm not much of a BOTW player so I cannot make any references. (sorry.) not proof read and not very thought out..

LoserReader!: who gets taken to the mall by Abby knowing you would try to stop at every video game store, pop culture, or figurine store to find something related to your favorite show or videogame just to end up not buying it. Abby spoils you anyway.

Abby:"I'll just buy it for you. . It's only like..$50."

Y/N:"$50..??"

Abby: "I'll spend $50 on you, it's your favorite game so.. why not? Plus, you're my girlfriend."

Gf!Abby: who notices you replaying your favorite game over and over again even though she just bought you a new video game you BEGGED for last week.

Abby: "Breath of the Wild..? Again.? What about that one game I jus- Nevermind."

Gf!Abby: Who isn't much of a gamer but still wants to support you, comes back from stores and stops by after work to get you something related to your interest.

Abby:"It's just a little figure, I saw it on the display and thought you'd like it."

Y/N:"LEMME SEE!"

Gf!Abby: Who leaves for work at 9am, coming back from work at 5pm seeing you in the same place she saw you in before she left. Either in your bed or on the couch playing your video games on call with Ellie Williams.

Ellie:"Dude Holy shitt! You didn't tell me this part would be so difficult..! Y/n!"

Gf!Abby:Who takes you to anime/Gaming conventions to be a nerd and watch you fangirl over your interests.

Y/N:"Abby! Abs! Look! This is the limited edition collector's Figure from 2006 that has the-" You get the point.

Gf!Abby:Who cosplays your favorite character's and plays video games with you to make it more fun.

I feel like Abby would be the type to make you do the same with her interests in a way? Like we all know she likes to work out, I feel like she'd drag you to the gym or into the studio to lift some weights and do yoga or something.

Sorry if these sucked, I took a long break now I'm brain dead lol

[no-nameno-face]

Voicemail (AUDIO)

Ellie Williams x Listener SFW Audio

Warnings: SFW AUDIO BUT NSFW ACCOUNT MINORS DNI. drinking is pretty much the only warning i can think of.. <3

Author's Notes: a quick little sfw audio now that im back home. <3 i threw this together super quick so its not anything exceptional (esp. the scripting lmfao) but its kinda cute. Just tipsy ellie thinking about you while shes out with jesse trying to be his wingman. I just updated my editing app and now my audios are doing this weird popping thing, trying to figure it out. Hopefully its not too painfully obvious. Lmfao. swf audios are hardddd. Idk how to write non-smut i stg. Its a problem. Hope you guys like this little blurb of an audio. <3 love you all bunches!!! (alsooo i dont think this music sucks for the record but i just KNOW ellie would. rip)

(thank you to @thatgiraffefromtlou for the request that inspired thisss ilysm <3)

[kurishiri]

03 . . . alfons main story (with letter)

꒰ ִ ֺ ⊹ @ notice ⊹ ֺ ִ ꒱ this translation may not be 100% accurate or contain creative liberties due to characterization or narrative flow purposes. if you enjoy, please consider reblogging, but don’t repost these or claim these as your own!

— cw: fluff?? in alfons route??? guys pigs might fly in the sky next- /lh

Ever since I had become Alfons’ ‘mission-only exclusive fairytale keeper,’ I put my energy into keeping as much distance as I could possibly get away from him.

(No Alfons to the right... and no Alfons to the left either. Which means I can get through the day without being found by him.)

Or, that would be nice, but he was also much like an apparition, appearing in the most unexpected times and places, so who knew where he’d pop up next...

Alfons: A very good day to you.

Kate: Eek!?

He didn’t make so much as a footstep as he popped up behind me, blowing into my ear and making me jump.

Kate: My heart was about to fly out of my chest, Alfons!

As always, I glared at him whilst hiding both my hands behind my neck, and he — as always — donned a smile laced with amusement.

Alfons: Hehe, but I do find it quite endearing, seeing you stand on your hair as you are doing now.

A: But worry not, my intentions are nothing short of pure now, so come here, won’t you?

Well, my trust in him was nothing short of nonexistent.

Kate: No thank you... and stop following me.

Alfons: Oh dear, your words ring so cold.

——Like that, while continuing to be bothered by Alfons,

I got to know the other members of Crown little by little in order to fulfill my duties as a ‘fairytale keeper.’

For example, let’s take Liam.

Although he was such a brilliant stage actor, very sensitive and a wonderful person to boot,

his Curse made it so he couldn’t suppress his curiosity, and he would occasionally go out with Alfons, whom he considered a friend, to do dangerous games.

(And when I say ‘dangerous games’... I’m not sure I want to know what that entails.)

As for Harrison,

I had come to realize that beneath his somewhat curt disposition was someone who would often lend a helping hand to those who needed it.

He was also quick-witted enough to slip past even Alfons’ eyes at times, too.

(I heard he had the Lying Fox’s Curse... which sounds about right.)

(But, his lies come from a kind place... at least, that’s what I think.)

And then there was Jude and Ellis, who were often absent from the castle due to their work at Jude’s company.

Jude was rather unapproachable with his sharp tongue, and he bore the Curse of the Thirteenth Fairy.

Meanwhile, Ellis, who was always gentle and kind, bore the Curse of the Thorns.

William and Victor were both shrouded in mystery, and I could never seem to figure out what those two were thinking.

But when I had heard that these two were the cofounders of Crown, I was surprised, to be sure, but I also felt it was a strangely fitting narrative at the same time.

(Both of them give off the impression that they are the last two people in the world you would want as an enemy...)

And then, there was Alfons. If I had to say anything about him...

(Whenever I ask the others questions about him, they all say more or less the same thing...)

And that is, ‘He is someone who relishes in others’ reactions, and loves to do things that feel good.’

—— Time skip ——

(Hah... I’m so tired.)

Today as well, the sun had set as I was gathering information on Crown as the fairytale keeper.

(Nothing like a cup of tea for a break.)

As I was brewing a cup, all of a sudden a hand reached out from behind without any warning.

Alfons: I see you have worked diligently today as well. Good job.

Kate: Wh—Alfons!?

Alfons: For the hardworking little robin, how about I personally brew the tea for you?

(Okay, but when did he come into the kitchen...!?)

Kate: Thank you, but no thank you. I can do it myself...

Alfons: I daresay there are a great many other things those words are better suited for.

With that, Alfons took the teapot from my hands before he started to brew the tea with elegant mannerisms.

(Ah...)

His gestures were so refined that without thinking, I continued to stare at him.

Such refinement felt almost tangible enough to make me think that this was not a superficial act, but rather the real thing.

Alfons: Here, it’s done.

He placed the teacup and the saucer on the table, and in an attempt to hide the fact that I was bewitched by his elegance for a moment, I accepted it in haste.

Kate: T-thank you very much...

When I looked into the cup, though, my eyes widened.

Kate: Wait, what is this tea? It’s all blue...

Alfons: That blue color would come from a herb called blue mallow. If you let it sit, it will eventually and gradually turn purple.

As if to prove his words then and there, the deep blue color started to change color.

It was as though the deep blue of the dawn sky was being lightly blotted by vermillion.

Kate: You’re right... I’ve never seen anything like this before...

Alfons: Go on now, have a sip.

I took in the beautiful colors with my eyes before I brought the cup to my lips, taking a sip.

Just like that, the fragrance wafted up my nose and drifted apart.

Kate: ...It’s really good.

(How long has it been since I relaxed like this...)

Gradually, the feeling of caution I initially had seemed to loosen before I knew it.

Alfons: I am glad to hear. But there is one more possible but interesting change this tea can produce. Would you care to see it, by any chance?

Kate: An interesting change...?

With a few drops of whatever was in the small bottle he used, this time the blue mallow tea changed into a light pink color.

Kate: Oh my gosh... it’s so pretty...! It’s just like actual magic...!

The change was so vivid and beautiful, I felt in high spirits, as though I were a child again.

Alfons: Hehe.

Hearing stifled laughter, I looked at him to find him looking at me with a smile playing on his lips.

Alfons: I take it you feel a little more merry now, no?

Kate: Merry...?

K: ...Did you do all of this because I kept avoiding you?

Alfons: Why indeed, for you see, I was hoping to have more opportunities to talk to you.

Kate: ...!

He booped my nose, and my heart skipped a beat in response.

Kate: And you doing these types of things is exactly why I avoided you, so please stop.

Alfons: Now whatever could ‘these types of things’ be referring to is beyond me.

Kate: ...Actually, you know what, forget it.

The memories of the sweet sensations we exchanged as lovers was engraved in my body...

(So every time he touches me, my heart twinges...)

The suggestive traces of that troublesome illusion just would not disappear.

(But then he goes and touches me anyway, even though he probably knows... and it really is wretched.)

Alfons sat on the table as he drank his own cup of tea, and I gave him a fleeting look.

Kate: ...You do know it’s bad manners to sit on the table while drinking tea, don’t you?

Alfons: Oh? Did you perhaps expect better of me?

A: Am I to assume that you feel someone who deceived a girl the day after they met, namely myself, is the model of sincerity and manners?

I wanted to hide the turmoil broiling in me, so I tried to change the topic altogether, but Alfons just used my words to make fun of me instead.

[1] Don’t remind me of that night. (+4 / +4)

[2] Sincerity is anywhere but in you.

[3] That’s not very nice.

Kate: Please don’t remind me of that night...

Alfons: Oh please, I implore you to remember it every night.

A: After all, is it not better for your mind to be filled to the brim with pleasure and fun?

A: And I take it you have been conversing with the others, no? In which case, they must have mentioned that I very much fancy pleasurable things.

As though saying he had seen through what I’ve been doing, he flashed me a bright smile.

But——

(Hm? Wait a minute...)

When I looked at that smile as a whole once again, I suddenly remembered a feeling of unease.

(Up until now, I had been so dumbfounded by his words and actions that I hadn’t realized this, but...)

Kate: ...What you said just now... was that all true?

Alfons: Come again?

(Ah... just what am I asking?)

Even I thought it strange.

But, for some reason, I felt I couldn’t ignore this unease that suddenly bubbled from within my heart.

Kate: I don’t know, I mean, just now... you...

K: I felt you weren’t genuinely smiling.

Alfons: ......... [surprised]

Seeming taken aback, Alfons blinked for a moment.

(Ah... but this expression... feels more genuine.)

I leaned forward and stared into his eyes, as though I could reach somewhere further.

But before I could reach that point, it seemed to mysteriously crumble before me...

Alfons: ...Is that the me who you wish to see?

...and painted on his lips was that shady smile I was all too familiar with.

Kate: ...What?

Alfons: Would it be safe to assume you prefer the me who appears to be having fun, when in actuality I am but an empty shell of myself, who is not having fun at all?

A: Hmm... so I see.

Kate: Since when were we talking about my preferences?

K: Can you not dodge my ques...

My words were cut off by his lips falling on mine.

Kate: ...!!

Alfons: ...Hehe.

A: Like this, I do implore you to keep your mind filled to the brim with thoughts of me.

When his lips parted from mine with a small sound, I could only stare dazedly back.

With a charming smile, he left the kitchen just like that.

(Ugh, he’s the absolute worst! Bloody wicked! Lowest of the low!)

I wiped my lips from having just been kissed before downing the rest of the now-lukewarm blue mallow tea in one go.

(The whole ‘I very much fancy pleasurable things’... and that smile...)

(I do really feel like he did dodge the question about whether those were genuine or not.)

Kate: Forget it, I couldn’t care less anymore...

All I wanted at this point was to not be toyed around by Alfons anymore.

——But perhaps because I wished for this...

(...He’s not here today either...)

Alfons, who had — much to my chagrin — kept me company, suddenly disappeared off the face of the castle, and then several days had passed.

(It’s not as though I’m particularly worried about him or anything...)

Kate: ...Have any of you seen Alfons at any point these last few days?

Roger: Ahh, well this isn’t anything new.

Elbert: I believe he is somewhere in London... probably.

Hearing those uncertain words made me suck in a breath, and I remembered something Alfons had said before.

(I believe he said that he considered himself “something like Lord Elbert’s attendant”...)

...not that I knew what he was implying when he said ‘attendant.’

But if that meant something like a butler, then I could get past him being proficient at brewing tea.

Kate: I was under the impression that he was your attendant, Lord Elbert, so is it really alright to let him do as he wants like this?

His blue eyes slightly wavered, much like a sea being blown by the wind.

Elbert: I would not say ‘attendant,’ per se...

E: Al is more like a childhood friend with whom I spent time with since we were young... perhaps.

Kate: Oh, is that so?

Lord Elbert was an earl.

(And although I am not an expert when it comes to titles of nobility...)

(...he might have used the term ‘attendant’ because of Lord Elbert’s high social standing.)

Or maybe he has been with him like family or something along those lines?

Lord Elbert bore the Curse of the ‘Greedy Queen,’ and I came to know during my time getting to know the members that he was searching for beautiful things.

That, and Alfons was allegedly helping with that.

Lord Elbert always seemed to don a melancholy air about him, while Alfons seemed to have a perpetual smile plastered on his lips.

(These two are so opposite of one another that them being able to get along is a wonder.)

Elbert: So that is why... I hold no control over Al’s actions.

E: ...My apologies.

Kate: Oh, don’t worry about it! It’s fine, really. If he is not taking me along then I assume he’s not out on a mission right now.

K: But... about this ‘not being anything new’... does that mean you have some inkling as to where he is?

Roger: If I had to guess, probably either a pub, a social club, or some street corner.

Kate: Huh...?

Roger: His playmates could be women or men. Or something else entirely. ...What, you’re interested in that, lil lady?

Kate: N-not at all!

(It’s not as though I’m particularly worried or anything.)

But, I do find myself thinking.

(I wonder if Alfons shows a genuine smile in places like those...)

(Because if that’s the case, I wonder what it looks like——)

(...N-not that I’m really interested to know...)

Trying to calm my feelings, which wavered back and forth like a pendulum, I slapped my own cheeks a couple times.

Elbert: ...Are you alright, Kate?

Roger: You’re probably feeling a lot of things right about now, aren’t you? I’ll cut you a break.

Just like that, several days later, after being absent with not so much as a single word——

Alfons: It has been a long minute since we last saw each other, Miss Kate. How have you been faring these past days?

Having been notified by William that there was a mission, Alfons popped up in front of me, as though he hadn’t disappeared completely for some days right before.

to be continued…

It has been a while

What do you think of my strategy of pulling back if pressing you doesn’t work?

If the man who had been meddling you to the brink of annoyance suddenly disappeared just like that, I imagine you would think to yourself, ‘What happened to him?’ and your mind would become even more filled with thoughts of me, no?

Ahh, but by no means am I writing this letter as a means to shame you. Just that you seem to feel the tactics between men and women are a foreign concept, and you seem almost laughably inept at forgetting the partners with whom you spend a single night with, so worrying is but the natural thing you would do. I wanted to say these words to you, and that is ultimately what drove me to pen this letter.

By the way, word is that I have extremely bad handwriting... were you able to read through it?

Just imagining your face realizing that you struggled to read through this letter only to find out the contents are as nonsensical as my handwriting, brings me much amusement.

Well then, until next time.

← prev next →

masterlist🪞 ╱ ko-fi ☕️

꒰ ִ ֺ ⊹ @ tags🏷️ ⊹ ֺ ִ ꒱ @drachonia @.comment or dm to be added or removed!

[borntoocry]

𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐲.                                  e. williams x reader

𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐

summary: yn and Ellie smoke and talk about everything relationship related. something very real and needed after yn’s disappearance. 

word count: 3.8K

warnings: violence.

tag list: @evangelinejxy @zahrwa @machetegirl109 

Madelaine was a girl you could only explain with a 2014 grunge Pinterest board. Her brown hair appeared black at certain angles, which confused you, and it made you angry how well she suited the changing colors. She was Snow White except she wore black tights and black shorts and boots that crawled up her knees. Her long sleeve was tight against her skin and you could see her nipples poking through the material. She was this aesthetic looking girl that was everything you wanted to be.

Ellie had the girl you wished to be and she didn’t even love her. This felt like a slap to the face, a kick to the stomach, and stomp on the head, a thorough beating. It felt like all of your nightmares were jumping you.

You shook her hand and offered a curt smile. You were angry at Madelaine somehow. She was perfect and she seemed nice, but Ellie didn’t love her. So what on earth was she doing wrong? Was she perfect for absolutely no reason?

“YN,” you said, which took the smile on her lips and dragged it to the ground. You retrieved your hand and stuck both into your butt pockets. “I see my name fucks everyone up, huh?”

She shook her head. “No, I’ve just never seen you before. Ellie never showed me any pictures after I asked.”

You raised your eyebrows. “You wanted to see me?”

“I wanted to know what you looked like,” she clarified.

You nodded. “Ah. Well here I am. Infamous YN YLN.”

“You’re gorgeous,” she said, which shattered your already breaking heart.

When you were with Ellie, you were a silent 18 year-old girl who made no effort in getting to know more than five people. Your people consisted of Dina, Jesse, Ellie, and Ellie’s dealer, who was quite nice for a guy with gang-related tattoos and a scary face. Besides them, you didn’t speak to the people Ellie brought around. You were okay with them, but you didn’t become friends. You would just say hi and bye, nothing more. So for Madelaine to shake your hand and call you beautiful was both endearing and horrifying.

You nodded once more. “You are too.”

“No, hush.”

You playfully rolled your eyes albeit wanted to truthfully roll them. She knew she was beautiful, there was no lie about that. Maybe that’s one of the reasons Ellie didn’t love her.

You needed to smoke before your mind went haywire and you exploded. You were being an asshole again and you told yourself you’d be kind. “Do you smoke?” you asked Madelaine.

“Cigarettes?” she replied with her eyebrows knitted together.

Your eyes widened and you chuckled. “No. Weed.”

“Oh,” she popped. “No. I don’t do drugs. They mess with my mind.”

“Well that’s alright. If you don’t mind, I’ll be out front with a blunt.” You glanced behind you at Ellie rocking back and forth against the fence. “Weed’s on Dina if you’re up to smoke.”

“Oh Ellie doesn’t smoke,” Madelaine nipped.

“Oh?” You raised an eyebrow at Ellie. “You don’t?”

Ellie stared back at you with a locked jaw. Her hands were deep in her pockets but even then you could tell they were in fists. No words came out of her mouth. Not even a head shake.

“No,” Madelaine replied. For her. For the tough girl who used to be able to answer for herself. “She doesn’t like that stuff.”

“Since when?” you laughed.

“Since we started dating. I made her stop. It was nasty and I didn’t like her when she smoked.”

You wobbled back to look at them both. “And she just quit?”

“Yep.”

Now you understood why Ellie might’ve hated Madelaine. She was controlling. You glanced at Ellie and squinted your eyes at her figure. She was slumping over, she looked annoyed, and she looked like she desperately wanted to smoke.

“You don’t even let her on special occasions?”

Madelaine shook her head.

“Well that’s no fun,” you said with a smile. “She should be able to smoke sometimes.”

Madelaine scoffed. “I’m sorry YN but you aren’t her girlfriend anymore. You can’t make her follow your rules.”

You looked down at the girl and tilted your head. “Madelaine, when I was with Ellie, I didn’t make her follow any shit rule. She wasn’t my fucking puppy.”

She prodded the inside of her cheek with her tongue. “Well now I see why it didn’t work out.”

Ellie stepped forward and grabbed Madelain’s arm. She pulled her aside and quietly whispered something to her. She huffed and puffed but after a minute of staring at them, she stepped away and walked to the bonfire. She looked like a baby the way she prodded off.

This left you and Ellie staring each other down. You shoved your hands back into your pockets, awkwardly drifting your thumb over your butt. Ellie looked you over as if she hadn’t done it millions of times before and sucked her lips into her mouth. She was silently observing you like she was going to strike at any moment.

The longer Ellie stared, your craving intensified. You took a step to your right and cleared your throat. “C’mon,” you said, jutting your head towards the house, “let’s go bother Dina for some weed.”

Ellie followed behind you as you searched the house for Dina. After a minute of searching and coming up empty handed, you started yelling. This quickly caught everyone’s attention. It was funny how everyone turned their heads to see you desperate and afraid Dina had somehow taken her bright personality to another party. People spat out directions like ‘Over there!,’ or ‘She’s in the bathroom,’ even though there were about two and a half bathrooms in the house; and when you searched every bathroom, someone finally said, ‘She’s right here!’

A random girl was locking arms with your best friend and you pulled her away. You and Ellie tucked her into a corner and badgered her for her weed stash.

“YN,” she said, pushing your crawling fingers away from her sides. “Stop tickling me! My stash is in my room. In my closet on the highest shelf. It’s in a Toms shoe box.”

You kissed her cheek and gave her side one last pinch. “Thanks D, I owe you.”

She hummed and you quickly grabbed Ellie by the elbow. You pulled her up the crowded stairs and down the hall to the right, where Dina’s room was locked… and you were the only one with the key.

You dug into your bra and retrieved the purple key, shoving it into the lock and twisting and turning it. You finally opened the door and hauled Ellie inside. You slammed the door shut and twisted the lock. You dropped the key back between your boobs and ran to the closet, climbing over Dina’s heavy dresser to grab the Toms box decorated in pink duct tape. You took off the lid and smiled at the sight of the pre-rolls enclosed in a clear mason jar.

“How many do you think we’ll smoke?”

Ellie hummed. “Er… I’d say one is fine.”

You slowly turned to her with a hand tightly wrapped around Dina’s closet railing. “One?”

Ellie’s mouth fell open and she rolled her eyes. “Did you not hear what Madelaine said?”

“That her puppy doesn’t smoke weed anymore because it alters brain chemistry or some shit?”

“Ding-fucking-ding,” she said, her voice deep and annoyed.

You scoffed and took one singular pre-roll out of the jar. You placed the lid back onto the box and stuffed it in its respective place on the shelf. You snatched a lighter off her dresser and walked over to her bed.

You sat on the bed and slapped the space beside you. “C’mon over here and sit,” you said, to which dragged Ellie over. She acted like she didn’t want to sit next to you–a slouching back with a pair of dragged feet–but as she sat down, she inched her way closer to your body.

You placed the joint in your mouth and sparked the end of it with the hot pink lighter. You inhaled until the tip was cherry red and proceeded to do so as you removed the joint from your lips. You exhaled the cloud of smoke and passed the joint to Ellie, who was both mesmerized and hungry.

“Are you a lightweight now too?” Ellie asked as she stuffed the joint between her lips.

You shrugged. “Currently, no. But maybe next month.”

“What do you mean?” Ellie rasped, the sound of smoke lingering in her throat vibrating through her words.

“Every once in a while I give myself a tolerance break for a certain drug. Last month it was alcohol. Instead of drinking a shit ton, I smoked a shit ton. So right now I have a high weed-tolerance, but a low alcohol-tolerance.”

Ellie hummed. “And why do you do it?”

You took the joint from her nimble fingers and raised it up to your lips. “Feels like I’m doing some heroic shit for my body.”

“And does it work?”

You inhaled, exhaled, and chuckled. “I don’t fucking know.”

She laughed. The sound reminded you of moments you didn’t want to reminisce on just yet. So you took another hit and asked, “So what’s up with your girlfriend?”

Ellie sighed. She placed her feet on the ledge of the bed and hugged her knees. “It’s too complicated to talk about. I don’t even know how to explain it.”

You shoved her shoulder with your own and looked over at her. “Before we dated we were best friends. And even when we did, you were one of my only friends. So spit it out. I don’t care if I have to figure it out in my head.”

She nodded and leaned against your warm body. “She has a strange mentality,” she began, her hands picking at her jeans and the patch of skin at her knee. “When we first started talking, I didn’t realize. And when we first started dating, I brushed off her weird remarks and lack of communication ‘cause I really did like her. She’s gorgeous, you know that, and she makes killer first impressions. When I first started noticing the strange things she would say, like, “You’re almost like a guy so you wouldn’t understand this,” I would just laugh it off because if I said anything about it, I’d end up overthinking it.” She exhaled a string of breaths that continued for a couple of seconds. She dropped her head and your mind kept telling you to pick it up for her and kiss away the wrinkle between her eyebrows. But Ellie sniffled and you quickly realized this topic was more serious than you thought. Madelaine truly was a monster. “I used to think that when I pointed out more shitty things about her, that I was only finding a reason to leave her. But I wasn’t. She just was an asshole.”

You ashed the joint and placed it on the ashtray beside you. You dropped your head to level with hers and whispered, “I know there’s more you want to say. You can say it, I promise I won’t say anything.”

She nodded. “YN, I know you think I should stay with her, but I know I need to leave her. This has nothing to do with you coming back but at the same time it has so much to do with you coming back.” She glanced at you and squinted. “For the year and a half I have been with her, my feelings haven’t even been considered. I haven’t been taken out on dates, I haven’t been the one receiving shit, I haven’t even gotten fucking head, YN,” she laughed manically. “She treats me like I’m a guy.”

“All because you’re masculine?”

“Exactly.”

The eye contact between you was as strong as the drugs mixing in your body. You kept looking at each other, observing one another’s matured faces and wishing you could see if more than just her freckled skin had matured. You knew she had changed–her figure took on more muscle than you could believe, her hands were even more godsent than before, and her hair was shorter, offering a better view of her chest–but to this extent? You were a melting ice cream cone begging the sun to just fade away.

“When you stare at me like that I don’t think we can have a serious conversation,” Ellie whispered.

“Well you started it,” you replied.

“Sure,” she rasped. “But truthfully, I do want to hear from you. What do you think of her?”

You rolled your eyes and steadied your hands along your thighs. “I think she’s a dumb bitch who deserves my fist in her fucking face.”

Ellie chuckled. “You’re not fighting anyone.”

“Yeah well who is she to treat you like you’re not a woman? Just because you’re a masculine woman doesn’t mean you have manly emotions or manly feelings and thoughts. And it especially doesn’t mean you don’t deserve head. Does she not want to because you don’t have a dick or something?” you exclaimed.

“Probably,” she muttered.

Ellie had never been the type to spit out what was shredding her to pieces. It struck arguments when you were together, but you worked it out every time. You could tell Madelaine didn’t care. Not about Ellie’s emotions, her mental health, nor her sexual needs. If she was in such distress every time she was with Madelaine, she needed to leave the relationship.  

“Fuck her,” you spat. “Bring her to me and I’ll tear her stupid leather jacket to pieces.”

“Don’t,” Ellie said. “It cost me damn near two-hundred bucks.”

“Shut the hell up,” you said. “For what?”

“Her birthday. She kept crying about it and I was tired of hearing her yap about it, so I bought it.”

“And what did she give you in return?”

“It was a gift, YN,” Ellie clarified as if you hadn’t heard her loud and clear.

“Yeah but I don’t mean what you think I mean,” you answered. “I mean, did she fuck you for it?”

“Fuck no,” she said.

“Then fuck her and her dumbass Pinterest board aesthetic.”

Ellie cackled. She fell into your side and you leaned your laughing face against her forehead. You placed a hand on her thigh to keep you both steady but as she pulled away, your hand remained glued to her. She gazed at her burning skin and then up at you. Your throat throbbed and you swallowed the spit halting you from speaking and breathing.

Ellie tugged your hand higher up her thigh and you flinched. You pulled back and instead, placed your burning fingers between your thighs. Ellie could feel the tension tying around your necks, but she did nothing to soothe it. Instead, she made a Boy Scouts knot and pulled as tightly as she could.

“Why’d you leave?” she asked you.

You dropped your head as she had done once before and huffed. “I told you already.”

“You didn’t tell me anything; you wrote me a note.”

“And I’m sorry, but my reason is on that piece of paper.”

“But what if I want to hear you say it?” Ellie pleaded.

You slid a hand over your eyes and stopped at your chin to pinch and somehow stop yourself from crying out. The topic of leaving for two years and magically reappearing made you emotionally unsteady. You constantly thought about it, but you rarely spoke of it. Speaking of it somehow made everything worse.

“I don’t know how to tell you.”

“Well like you said, we used to be best friends. You can tell me anything.”

You looked up at her through your eyelashes and found the calmness within her eyes. You nodded and stood up. If Ellie didn’t like your answer, you wouldn’t have to fight her away if you needed to leave. You could simply walk out of the door. It was easier this way.

“Well I don’t know. You broke me when you said what you said. Calling me insecure and bashing me for having trust issues made me go insane. I mean…” You drew in as much air as you could and held it at the bottom of your stomach. “I loved you, Ellie. I loved you so much my heart fucking hurt every time I thought about our relationship. You were so good to me. You listened to me and you tended to every desire I had. You didn’t just want me for sex. You wanted me for my brain and my feelings and emotions. And you were patient!” you exclaimed. “You were so patient. But then you said I was insecure and I didn’t trust you. But I did. I did trust you, Ellie. With my heart. But I was a terrible overthinker; and every person I had been with before you treated me like I was just a person and not their significant other. Like I was just a ragdoll they could shove their dick or fingers into and I’d be alright for the next few days. They would leave me for someone else and come back to me. So when you would go home every other month, I was scared you would find someone else and leave me at college to find out you didn’t love me anymore.”

When you stopped walking back and forth and looked at Ellie, you froze. Her face was red and splotchy and tears were running down her cheeks. She was no longer cradling her knees, but on the edge of the bed, arms on her thighs and eager to stand.

You walked to her and sat down in front of her. She followed suit and sat down, her hands reaching for sweaty ones. She separated your thumbs and placed them on her lips. She kissed the pads of your thumbs. Over and over again. It felt like cheating. It probably was, but neither of you could pull away.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered against your skin. You grasped her cheeks and caressed her jaw with your remaining fingers, trying to brush away her tears. “I’m sorry I didn’t take my time to understand why you had a hard time trusting me. I should’ve known.”

You shook your head. “You didn’t know and I never made an effort to tell you. This wasn’t entirely your fault.”

“I shouldn’t have lashed out, though.”

“And I shouldn’t have left,” you whispered. “I should have talked to you about it instead of leaving.”

“And you left because…”

“I had to work on all of my unresolved problems. I was a mess, and I did have trust issues I failed to work on, and I was a raging insecure idiot. So you weren’t lying, but I guess the truth hurt like hell.”

Ellie nodded. “I was still an idiot for yelling at you and scaring you off. I might have made you realize something, but I shouldn’t have bashed you for it. I should have sat down and brought up something that hurt me. So we could calmly talk about it.”

“Yeah well now what can we do?” you said. Your thumbs were now traveling around her lips, touching the crevices and smoothing over her smile lines. Or lack thereof.

“Nothing,” she answered. “But–”

“I think you should break up with her,” you spat. Ellie’s eyes exploded. “You should leave her. She’s no good for you.”

“I know, I know, but it’s not as easy as we say it is.”

“Well I can help.”

“YN.”

“Ellie.”

She pulled your hands away from her face and placed them on her hips. She hovered over you as she sat on her knees, and with her own pair of hands, graced your face. You looked up at her, confused and drenched with tears. She slowly leaned in and you shut your eyes–if she was going to cheat, you didn’t want to see her as she did it.

You could feel her breath panning against your mouth and you hummed. She was going to kiss you after two years.

She was.

Until a terrifying knock shook you both out of your shoes. You pulled away and stood up, dusting yourself off before the doom–Madelaine–bursted in. You dusted yourself off on your way to the vibrating door, and unlocked it. You opened the creaking wood and smiled at the angry Madelaine.

“Hey,” you said with a smile.

You couldn’t catch her punch as your tears were still invading your eyes. But when you wiped your eyes away and dodged her next wobbling punch, you struck her right in the jaw.

Holy shit, you thought, I just knocked out Ellie’s shitty girlfriend.

And holy shit thought Ellie too. She quickly grabbed you and wiped your bloody face, holding you away from Madelaine, who was slowly dragging herself up. She pointed at you, spitting out blood and curses.

You laughed. “Fuck you!” you shouted over Ellie’s shoulder. “You controlling bitch!”

“You’re the homewrecker!” she shouted back.

“You can’t wreck a home that’s already broken, you psycho.”

Madelaine got up and walked over to you and Ellie. She dug her finger into Ellie’s chest and pushed her away. Thankfully, Ellie pushed her away and said, “Just sit down and talk. Why the fuck did you have to punch her?Are you fucking crazy?”

“The fuck?” Madelaine spat. “You were going to have sex with her while your girlfriend was outside crying.”

“I wasn’t going to have sex with her, Maddie,” Ellie whined.

“Yeah well from what I heard out here, you were.”

You stood by and watched, saying nothing but wanting to throw another punch at her stupid face.

“I wasn’t going to fuck her! But whatever you heard out there was fucking true! So while I wasn’t going to fuck her, I am going to break up with you.”

Madelaine’s jaw trembled. You looked down at her figure–her red hand was balled up into a fist, ready to swing again, but this time into Ellie’s face. She raised her fist into the air and as she was about to knock it into Ellie’s jaw, you pulled her forearm and pulled her onto the ground beside you.

Ellie stepped back as your fist collided with her cheek. This was enough to calm her down for the next couple of seconds. She laid on the floor like a baby, but with blood and tears instead of just tears.

You looked up at the people surrounding the room. The audience was too in shock to pull out a phone, and for that you were grateful. People would have thought you were fighting over a girl. Which, to an extent, you were. But to you, you were fighting someone to defend your best friend.

“Someone come get this bitch and calm her the fuck down,” you shouted, pulling everyone out of their wide-eyed stare. Dina, who was pushing against everyone, dragged Madelaine out of the room with only an enthusiastic “Good job” coming out of her mouth.

[judesmoonbeauty]

Hey Jude.

WC: 969, CW: None, Genre: Music, Bad Dream, Just for fun, Pronouns: Her Dividers: @/sligheach-sidhe

Last week at work I searched Jude's name on YT (just because), and I came across this song by The Beatles called: Hey, Jude! And immediately, the heavens opened up and granted me this scene of the members of Crown all singing to Jude, who's stuck and can't runaway. I was wheezing in the office as the song played and my co-worker asked me if I was okay because I was losing it. It is probably much funnier inside my head than how I conveyed it, but whatever, I enjoyed writing it. I humbly apologize for introducing this into society. You can listen to the song here.

A single spotlight flashed from above in the pitch black room illuminating a rather foreboding figure who was firmly fixed to the stool he was sitting on. He wasn’t physically restrained, but for some reason each time he tried to stand up, it was like he was magnetized to the chair. His eyebrow twitched, but at least he was able to pull out a cigarette to smoke. After a welcomed puff escaped his lips, he heard a melodious voice sing out beside him.

“Hey Jude, don’t make it bad…….”

Jude turned his head to find Victor standing behind a microphone as a soft light gradually illuminated him, with William and Harrison on the platform as well. There was something shimmery in Victor’s hair that looked like little stars, and he was wearing something black and smudgy under his eyes that accentuated them. Just as Jude was starting to feel disgusted at the sight, he noticed William playing the piano and Harrison starting to shake a tambourine as he read the latest Conan Doyle release. It was clear that William was catering to Victim’s whims and Harrison was no doubt made to be there, but completely disinterested in what was happening. Then Victor started singing the second verse.

“Hey Jude, don’t be afraid….”

Another platform in front of Jude lit up as well. Roger and Alfons were playing the guitar and harmonizing their voices, while Ellis was coolly playing a drum set behind them. Jude couldn’t make sense of what was happening and he couldn’t very well think clearly either over Victor’s screeching voice. So, he took another puff of his cigarette, still unable to move from the stool that he was sitting on in the middle of the room.

“And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain……”

Odd multi-colored lights started to strobe overhead while mist started to slowly fill the room from behind the stages. Jude didn’t know how any of this was possible, but he was sure that it took a great amount of engineering. A cigarette butt dropped to the floor and he quickly lit another.

“Remember to let her under your skin……”, The next thing he knew Elbert and Liam started to dance in harmonious circles around him, while throwing pink and purple flower petals at him. A vein quietly popped on his temple, but he remained silent and continued to suck on his cigarette.

“Ahhhhh…..Na na na na na……Hey Jude……”

He didn’t know what they hell was happening, but it clearly was a nightmare as he was unable to move from his seat. Victor belted his voice in a high note as he jumped on the floor to join Elbert and Liam in throwing flower on Jude, not caring that he was piercing Jude’s eardrum. Victor was in hopes that their song would move him to open up to the one he’d been pushing away, and he called for Ellis to join them on the floor, handing him a flower crown to place on top of Jude’s head.

“Be honest with your feelings, Jude. Then you’ll be happy.”

Ellis joined the four other Crown members swirling and dancing around him, as his boss stared at his with a murderous look in his eye. Pissed at the flower crown being placed on his head, he tried to remove it, but some invisible force restrained him from doing so. He lights a third cigarette and watches the remaining band members carry on the song, Victor belting it out with his hand held mic, and Roger now playing the drums to replace Ellis.

It was utter chaos. Crazy lights, mist, make up being worn by Crown’s leader, flowers on his head and flowers being tossed at him. “Na na na na na, Hey Jude…..”

That stupid chorus kept being repeated. Over and over. It didn’t stop. However, by the time he put the fourth cigarette in his mouth, something unexpected happened. Jude was able to shift a little on the stool he was sitting on, and the more he thought of it, he realized it was because the song was reaching the outro. Soon, he was able to stand and as the members of Crown continued to play and sing,”Jude….Na na na na…..Wooooow….Hey….Hey…Yeaa, Yeaaa, Yeaa….”, Jude slowly walked up to a stand holding spare guitars.

Smiling with the lit cigarette between his teeth, he picked up a beautiful electric guitar, kicked over the remainder on the stand and then started busting everything up. He picked up the stool and threw it at Victor and the other three who ran away in terror as Victor continued to sing. Leaping onto the different stages Jude started kicking over the equipment, and smashing the instruments.

Jude wreaked havoc on the musical room that kept trapped inside, and by the time he was finished, sparks were flying over head from the damage he did. He laughed sinisterly, ripping the flower crown off his head he turned on his heel and walked out….

“Hey, Jude.”

His eyes shot wide open. Not that shit song again, he thought.

“Want to walk to the bakery with me?” He rubbed his eyes in relief that what he just endured truly was a nightmare.

“Hell no I d-”, Just as he was about to decline, the words that Victor sang in his dream echoed in his brain.

“Hey Jude, don't be afraid. You were made to go out and get her.”

It wasn’t that he wanted her necessarily, but he wanted to stop hearing those annoying words ringing in his head. So he agreed.

“Fine, but ya owe me.”

“Alright, it’s my treat then.”

It was just to get that annoying song out of his head. He wasn’t afraid of anything. He wasn’t.

@atelierquinn @ichigostellaglynn @mrslelouch Please comment or DM me if you want to be added to my tags list. [Master List]

[totheblood]

the hard way. [part viii.]

PAIRING: rockstar!ellie williams x ex-gf!reader

SUMMARY: you and ellie broke things off years ago, everyone knew this. what they didn't know was why. when a mysterious anonymous account pops up, seeming to know what happened, you and ellie are forced into talking again to find out who it is. problem is she's a rockstar and on tour, you may just have to figure it out over text.

WARNINGS:  cursing, mentions of drinking/drugs, mentions of s*x

A/N: from ellie's perspective... some big reveals... hopefully this can help people out with their theories.. sorry im stressing you out i love u all so bad. reblogs, likes, asks, replies are greatly appreciated and encouraged!

masterlist

[part vii.] ⟿ [part ix.]

[maesfics]

𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑑 '𝑒𝑚 . . . ᥫ᭡

OUTER BANKS.

↬ jj maybank. from the nextflix series "Outer Banks," is a charismatic and impulsive troublemaker with a heart of gold.

↬ rafe cameron. from netflix series "Outer Banks," is a troubled and unpredictable rich kid grappling with deep-seated issues and a desire for approval.

SEVENTEEN.

↬ boo seungkwan. better known as Seungkwan from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN, is celebrated for his powerful vocals and dynamic stage presence. His quick wit and humor make him a standout personality both on and off stage.

↬ lee seokmin. better known as DK from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN, is a talented singer with a bright personality and a heartwarming smile.

↬ hong jisoo. better known as Joshua from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN, is a gentle and soft-spoken singer with a serene presence and a knack for songwriting.

↬ kim mingyu. from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN is a charismatic and visually striking member, known for his model-like appearance and easygoing, friendly demeanor.

↬ choi seungcheol. better known as s.scoups, the leader of K-pop group SEVENTEEN, is known for his strong leadership, deep voice, and caring nature, often acting as a supportive pillar for the group.

↬ yoon jeonghan. from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN is known for his angelic visuals, playful personality, and soothing vocals that add a unique charm to the group's dynamic.

↬ xu minghao. known as the8 in the K-pop group SEVENTEEN, brings a unique blend of martial arts-inspired dance moves and a soft, ethereal vocal style. His artistic sensibilities and fashion-forward image add a distinct flavor to the group's performances

THE LAST OF US (VIDEO GAME).

↬ abby anderson. from the video game "The Last of Us Part II," is a fiercely determined and physically strong character, driven by a deep sense of loyalty and a quest for revenge.

↬ dina woodward. from the video game "The Last of Us Part II," is a brave and compassionate survivor, known for her witty sense of humor and supportive nature.

↬ ellie williams. from the video game "The Last of Us I & II," is a resilient and complex character, marked by her toughness and emotional depth in a post-apocalyptic world.

ALL OF US ARE DEAD.

↬ lee su-hyeok. from "All of Us Are Dead," is a resourceful and athletic high school student, known for his bravery and quick thinking during the zombie crisis.

↬ choi nam-ra. a character from "All of Us Are Dead," is depicted as a mysterious and intelligent student, who harbors a secret strength amidst the chaos of a zombie outbreak.

↬ lee cheong-san. from the series "All of Us Are Dead," is portrayed as a brave and selfless high school student, who emerges as a protective figure during a zombie apocalypse.

XO KITTY.

↬ minho. from the series "XO, Kitty," is a charming and thoughtful character, known for his kind heart and the sweet, supportive role he plays in the story.

TRUE BEAUTY.

↬ lee suho. from the series "True Beauty," is a handsome and aloof high school student who harbors deep emotional scars beneath his perfect exterior.

↬ han seojun. from "True Beauty," is a charismatic and tough-looking character with a warm heart and a hidden passion for music.

masterlist will be updated frequently.

[bingbongsupremacy]

Ghosts

Pairing: Ellie Williams x !platonic reader x Dina

Warnings: kinda asshole ghost!ellie

Summary: You meet the ghost of Ellie Williams, a dead high schooler at Jackson High. Strange way to start off a friendship.

Idea from Pinterest.

*Not Proof Read* TLOU Masterlist

*****

Jackson high's been around for decades. Of course with a school this old there's bound to be some fucked up stories or legends that come with it.

The latest one is about an old senior named Ellie Williams. She died 2 years ago in an accident, way before I came into town. Of course I don't believe the stupid rumors. Frankly, it's pretty fucked up to make stuff up like that. Just let the girl rest in peace.

With a loud sigh, I set plop open my math text book. I carefully begin jotting down the questions, trying my best to remember what my teacher taught this morning.

I never seem to be able to retain what she tells me. Maybe it's her boring monotone voice or maybe it's the fact that I'd much rather be scraping my eyes out with a fork that causes me to get so easily distracted. I have to get this shit nailed though. If I fail again I won't be able to graduate.

My parents will be so pissed.

The library is empty. Who knows where the librarian is. Probably talking gossip with the office secretaries. I mean, who in their right mind stays after school on a Friday to finish school work?

Me. That's who.

Against my will of course.

The sooner I get this shit done the sooner I can go home and play some games. Come on. Just fucking focus.

" X= 930. " A voice whispers suddenly, scaring the shit out of me.

I look around for the culprit, only to be met with no one. " What the hell? " I mutter, shaking my head. A shiver runs down my spine. I feel like someone's watching me. Who though? There's no one here and there's no fucking way Jackson High has enough for cameras in the library.

I shake off the feeling and try to return to my work. It had to be my head.

I begin re-reading the problem, trying to solve it. What the fuck am I supposed to do here?

" X= 930. " The voice whispers again, this time slightly louder.

There's someone fucking here. Either that or I'm going insane.

My head snaps around to the direction of the voice. " Who the fuck is that? Jordan, I swear to god if you're fucking with me I'll kick your ass. " I threaten. I stand up, walking over to the book shelves. I peek in and out of the isles, looking for whoever was talking.

" Oh my fucking god! For the last time, the answer for 3 is fucking X= 930. " The voice yells from the table area, clearly annoyed.

I rush back to the noise, my jaw dropping.

A faded figure stares at me, annoyance clearly displayed through their expression.

" I-I can see through you. " I stumble over my words.

The figure rolls their eyes. " Yeah, no shit sherlock. I'm a ghost. "

" Ghost? "

The girl sighs, rubbing the middle of her forehead. " Now I see why you were stuck on that problem for so long. " Yes, I'm a ghost. I'm dead. My name's Ellie Williams, mighta head of me, ya? "

I swallow harshly. " Oh my god. You're fucking real. You're fucking real? "

Ellie nods, sitting on top of the table. " Yup. And I was trying to help you with your homework. Now, do you want my help or do you want to just stand there like a dork for the next hour? "

I shake my head and move towards the table. I sit back down, glancing back at Ellie every few minutes. " How are you..? "

" Here? " Ellie finishes. She shrugs. " Fuck knows. Just popped up one day. "

" How come I didn't see you a minute ago? " I ask, still shocked over the situation.

" I can control whether you see me or not. We both can. "

" Both? " I ask in confusion.

Ellie looks across the room. " D, you can come out now. "

Another figure pops up on one of the couches. Another girl around our age smiles slightly. " I'm Dina. "

" There's two of you. "

Ellie groans in annoyance. " What the fuck. We just went over this. "

" Ellie, be nice. " Dina walks towards us. " This is a lot to take in for a normal person. "

" It definitely is. " I begin grabbing my stuff. " I um, I've got to go. I have to go...water my...dog. " I nod, wanting nothing more but to get the fuck out of here.

" Ellie, look what you did. " Dina hisses as I begin walking away. " Do you really have to go? Ellie didn't mean it. She's just kind of an asshole. "

I look back at her. I chew on the inside of my cheek nervously. I glance between the girls.

Dina glares at Ellie.

" Yeah, sorry. " Ellie apologizes. " I was a little rude. "

" A little? " Dina scoffs.

" A lot. " Ellie corrects, clenching her teeth.

Dina rolls her eyes and crosses her eyes, looking back at me. As soon as she looks at me her expression brightens. " Please stay. We'll help you with your work. We haven't had very many new people to talk to in ages. It'd be so nice to catch up with someone not...dead. "

I glance at the door. Should I stay?

" Fine. " I sigh. " I guess I can stay for a bit. " I set my stuff back down.

If you had asked me what I was going to do today, talking to ghosts would definitely not be on my list.

[mystar-girl57]

☆ 𝐌𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐅𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬 ☆

𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : Astronaut Ellie Williams x Areospace Engineer Reader

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 : you and Ellie, both starry eyed dreamers are about to achieve your life goal

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : mentions of worry of death, mentions of implied near death experience, mentions of implied near drowning

𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 : a fluffy oneshot that just popped into my head a few days ago- also isn't really proof read

You didn’t want to open your eyes, you wanted to stay right where you lay, curled up with your wife under the safety of your bed’s comforter, the curtains drawn protecting you from the outside. In here, you were in your own little world where the only people that existed on your little planet was you and her.

You and Ellie met in college, both just starting interns at NASA with dreams so big they were reaching for the stars. And that was the goal the two of you shared, going up there in that big black void just once in your lives. You were twenty-seven now, Ellie just turning twenty-eight and your dreams had shifted. You both had gotten married young, when you were just barely at the age where you could legally drink and you were both onto your second phase of your education to work at NASA.

While you had originally wanted to be an astronaut like Ellie you were never able to complete your NBL test. You had gotten into the water, and due to someone kicking you in the back by mistake you hit one of the underwater beams causing your helmate’s glass face to crack before shattering completely, you barely made it out alive. After that you couldn’t bring yourself to go back in the water so you sat on the sidelines cheering Ellie on.

It seemed like your career at NASA, or any sort of program dealing with space was now impossible to reach. But after a couple more years of schooling and countless sleepless nights were brought on as an engineer.

Now almost all the years later you found yourself being one of the leading bodies in the up and coming space mission. Ellie’s space mission. It was her and two other bodies, they would go up, circle the planet a few times then come back, it should only take a few days. But the amount of wrong that could happen. From the moment your wife puts on that suit and gets into the Flight Deck her life was in danger. The ship could easily explode the moment it launches, an enemy country could shoot it out of the sky, a meteor; no matter how small, could strike the shuttle and everything could go to hell. But what scared you the most was that if something were to go wrong it would be on you. You tested that shuttle time and time again, you made sure its thermal protectors were in tacked, its rocket boosters were past perfect. Nothing bad was going to happen on this mission, not on your watch.

Unfortunately 2:30 a.m. came and your alarm started to scream. You could always just shut it off, let Ellie sleep in and miss the launch. But you knew that Ellie would be so upset at herself if that were to happen. She’d be hurt if she found out that you purposefully let her sleep over, missing the one thing that she had dedicated her whole life to since she was a little girl.

So you pulled the blankets off of your body and wearily reached over, hitting “OFF” on top of the glowing red digital clock. Ellie started to stir beside you, she must have felt you get up because soon she was rolling over onto her stomach, her arms loosely looped around your waist.

“What time is it?” She mumbled into your pillow.

“2:30”

“2:30?!”

Ellie shot up, her eyes suddenly wide and awake. Her head whipped to the white board calendar on your wall in your office space. The red x’s covered its pearly surface following the days until it reached a box that had “LAUNCH DAY!” with a big red circle around it and several arrows pointing to it. Around the circle was little stars and planets sporadically, Ellie even put a doodle of the two of you as stick figures in a rocket ship blasting off with a heart. It was obvious that she was excited for today.

You wish you were too.

Maybe if you were going up with her it would be different. You wouldn’t care so much about the safety hazards of this mission because if you were to die up there and your wife was with you then you could say you died happy.

But you were stuck down here on Earth, sending Ellie up there with two complete strangers, taking the risk of dying alone and you having to watch her die.

You stayed sitting in bed, numbly staring down at your stormy gray comforter and Evergreen throw blanket while Ellie got up to get things ready. You needed to leave in thirty minuets to ensure that you could be at the launch sight by quarter until four and the launch be at twenty five after six.

“Come on hun we ‘gotta get going!” Your wife called from your master bathroom. But when you didn’t respond she got concerned and peeked her head out to find you sitting in bed still, your head hung low.

“Baby?”

You didn’t look up at her, not until the bed dipped and Ellie’s calloused hands found your cheeks. She tilted your head up gently and was shocked to find tears glistening over your eyes.

“What’s the matter?” She asked softly.

Truth be told Ellie had been worried about you with the launch coming up. She knew how badly you wanted to go up there with her but with how the accident at the NBL pool held you back. She was worried that you were mad or maybe even jealous with her. But deep down Ellie knew that wasn’t the case.

As hard as you tried to hold back the negative emotions that were flooding you you still burst out into tears. “I don’t want you to die!” You sobbed. “I’ve been so scared about this mission and if something goes wrong it’ll be my fault! And— If you die—” you shook your head, gripping the blankets firmly, “I could never forgive myself!”

Ellie felt her heart squeeze and crack. You weren’t upset with her, you were scared for her! All the space missions in history that went wrong after something that was so easy to be fixed went unchecked and the astronauts died, all the horror stories that had been rushing through your brain since you had been asked to help spear head the perpation of this flight. Ellie understood now, this wasn’t jsut some ‘let’s cross our fingers and hope they come back alive mission’ this was a ‘if something goes wrong I will be losing my wife mission’. She knew that you hadn’t voiced any of these fears to her because you didn’t want her to be scared or ruin the excitement she was feeling.

“Baby, look at me.” The woman gently whispered and you hesitantly looked up. “Whatever happened today I promise everything will be fine. This is the risk that comes with this job. But the good that we are doing each time we go up there, whether its you me or who ever we discover a little more each time. I’m not going to lie I feel fucking terrified but you wanna know the one thing that is giving me some faith in this mission?”

“What?”

“You.”

You blinked at her, sniffling some. Had it not been such an emotional moment you would’ve called your wife out for the cheeseness in her words but you let her continue on.

“I feel safe knowing that it was you who helped design this shuttle, it was you that triple checked, probably quadruple checked each and every little detail, even the ones that most think aren’t important. I feel happy knowing that when we land in that ocean in the next two days its going to be your face that I’m greeted with when they come to get us.”

Ellie put her forehead against yours. “You have no idea how lucky I am to have you in my life. To be able to say look at her, that's my woman, that beautiful scientist that is making this whole mission possible is mine.”

Your wife gently pulled away and wiped off any tears that were left on your cheeks. “Now, are you ready to go make history love?”

With a nod you smiled up at her, your confidence returning and she responded by placing a sweet kiss on your lips.

It was time.

Two Days Later

“I see them!” One of the crew members called out standing on the bow of the Coast Guard's ship. You looked up from the little metal table that you and your fellow scientist were hunched over as you discussed some readings with them. “Excuse me,” you whispered putting your hand on one of your college's back telling them that you were leaving.

Stepping out of the captain's deck and into the cool sea air you heard the rescue boat splash down into the water racing toward the pod several yards out. Making your way to the bow of the ship you stood by the capitan. “May I?” You asked motioning to the binoculars.

“Of course Mrs. Williams!” The captain instantly shuffled to get them up off his neck and set them into your hand. You on the other hand rolled your eyes with a smile, lifting the took up to your eyes to get a better look at the pod and the luminescent boat careening to it.

“You know my name Jack, you can use it.”

After the launch you were surprised to learn of the reputation you had built for yourself over the past year. People had grown to respect you and see you as a leader of the team and while yes it flattered you, you wish they weren’t so jumpy around you.

The little craft pulled up beside the metal pod and one of the men got up to open the hatch. This was the moment of truth.

Johns stepped out, then Melissa and after a few moments you saw the striking auburn hair of your wife climbing out. Once they were safely on the boat and headed back to you the whole ship broke out into a chorus of cheers. You jumped and screamed, hugging the captain tightly, shaking him. You were so happy.

The Coast Guard's crew went to the starboard and helped up the woozy astronauts, stretchers and blankets ready should any of them collapse. Ellie’s legs felt like jello as she was pulled up out of the little raft and onto the firm floored ship. All she wanted was to let gravity take her body down and sleep for several years. But despite all of this, Ellie ignored the haziness clouding her vision, the fatigue eating away at her body and the nurses urging her to lay down, all she needed right now was you.

You pushed past the crew member that was keeping you and your fellow scientists back and raced towards your wife. It was like that sappy scene in all of those romance movies where the couple is dramatically reunited. You met in the middle and the moment that Ellie was in your arms she let her body slowly sink to the floor.

“We did it, Stars.” She sleepily smiled up at you as she leaned against you, the two of you sitting on the floor ignoring the looks you were getting from the rest of the crew. You leant down and placed a tearful kiss on your wife’s sweaty forehead, brushing the damp hairs off of her face.

“Yes we did.”

© 𝐦𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫-𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝟓𝟕 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐬