#elderly women are badass

[kraken-inclined]

This is actually incredible 🤯🙌🏻

[wild-wombytch]

Hi, women are great.

That's it, that's the post.

[aangarchy]

My little cousin (15) finished atla yesterday, y'all know the drill by now but here's her opinion of the characters after the s3 finale

Aang: "that's MY Avatar. The GOAT."

Katara: "amazing stunning wonderful beautiful powerful badass gorgeous talented-" this went on for a bit

Sokka: "the creators can't hide that he's bisexual."

Toph: "i couldn't get over the feral chihuahua energy i'm sorry"

Zuko: "... fine he's hot now happy?"

Azula: "i mean if my brother came in to ruin my coronation i would try to kill him and his little girlfriend too so"

Suki: "i wish i could kill people with a fan but alas i can only kill them the non cool way" Me: "the non cool way?" Her: "just stabbing."

Mai: "she deserves so much better than Zuko"

Ty Lee: "she joined the Kyoshi warriors, a group comprised of only women.... interesting."

Uncle Iroh: "i was really expecting the old man to bite it ngl i'm happy he stuck around tho"

Firelord Ozai: "we waited two seasons for his reveal and he's just some guy." Me: "yea that's kinda the point, that he's just a normal man" Her: "i could run him over with my bike."

The Old Masters: "the Okra bus got lost in Ba Sing Se lol" (for context okra is a belgian seniors organisation, like for the elderly to go on trips and such)

[saccharinescorpion]

4 Things You Can Try Now That You’ve Read THIS IS HOW YOU LOSE THE TIME WAR

(technically 5 things)

Mabel - a podcast by Becca De La Rosa and Maybell Marten.

Anna Limón is a home help worker currently looking after the elderly Sally Martin. When Sally has a bizarre and frightening reaction to a box of letters Anna finds in her attic one day, Anna attempts to seek answers by contacting Sally’s only known living relative: Mabel Martin.

“A podcast about ghosts, family secrets, strange houses, and missed connections,” Mabel is a story that is difficult to describe, but one of the most important points is that the vast majority of it is an epistolary narrative between Anna and Mabel, just like how This Is How You Lose The Time War is an epistolary narrative between Red and Blue. It also has a very distinct writing style- dramatic, flowery, and a little bit intimidating. However, if you loved the writing style of TIHYLTTW, I personally think that Mabel is a perfect match for you.

And I’m not just saying that because Mabel is a story about two extremely overdramatic women who are somehow both frighteningly caustic yet almost adorably useless.

The Honey Month - a book by Amal El-Mohtar 

I certainly hope I don’t have to tell you this, but Amal El-Mohtar is one of the authors of This Is How You Lose The Time War, and The Honey Month is a short book she wrote several years ago.

The Honey Month is almost more of an experiment than a book- in its introduction, a friend of El-Mohtar explains how she sent her several small samples of honey, leading El-Mohtar to use the gift as in a unique way. For one February, every day she used a different vial of honey as inspiration for a small piece of writing.

The Honey Month contains 28 short pieces of writing, poetry, prose, and some things in between. It’s a small book full of things with big impact, and contains the lyrical yet meaty writing I enjoyed from El-Mohtar in TIHYLTTW.

Otherside Picnic (裏世界ピクニック) - A series of novels by Iori Miyazawa (illustrated by Shirakaba)

College sophomore Sorawo Kamikoshi longs to find an escape from other people, and in trying to find it discovers the Otherside, a strangely beautiful yet unfathomably dangerous parallel world inhabited by the-once-fictional creatures she knows from net lore. She also meets Toriko Nishina, another young woman with a knowledge of firearms and a desire to find her missing mentor. Together, these two girls explore the Otherside and find themselves changing little by little, both due to their adventures, but also due to their relationship with each other.

If you know me you probably aren’t surprised at this reccomendation. Otherside Picnic is a truly odd beast- it’s sci-fi, it’s horror, it’s comedy, it’s yuri. It’s about trauma, it’s about Japanese creepypasta, it’s about useless lesbians, and it’s about how the scariest thing of all is being vulnerable with another human being. I think fans of  This Is How You Lose The Time War  will enjoy it- Otherside Picnic’s writing style will likely feel almost spartan compared to TIHYLTTW, but in my opinion there’s a similar level of poetry in it. There’s also a similar level of women who are “badass” yet kind of messes. You’ve heard of “Enemies to Lovers,” get ready for “Accomplices to Lovers”!

(there’s also a manga adaptation by Eita Mizuno, as well as an anime adaptation directed by Takuya Sato)

The Handmaiden (아가씨) - a movie directed by Park Chan-wook (written by Park and Chung Seo-kyung, based on the novel Fingersmith by Sarah Waters)

In Japan-occupied Korea, the pickpocket Sook-hee is recruited by a con-man to aide him in his scam of a Japanese heiress, Lady Hideko. While the con-man poses as “Count Fujiwara” and woos Hideko, Sook-hee will play the part of her maid and subtly push the heiress towards him. But as time passes, Sook-hee begins to realize there are things occuring in the mansion that are even more sinister than her and the Count’s scheme, and there is much, much more to Hideko than meets the eye.

This is a list of recommendations for “people who have finished “This Is How You Lose The Time War,” but I try to recommend The Handmaiden to as many people as I possibly can. I’ve described it in the past as the cinematic equivalent of running a marathon: with a 144 minute runtime full of gorgeous direction and set design, dark machinations, twisted yet romantic writing, often troubling themes, and so, so many plot twists, it’s a movie that nearly feels like too much of a good thing. But for fans of TIHYLTTW, I’m sure what will intrigue you most is the relationship between the two main characters, one so complicated that “Enemies to Lovers” can’t hope to capture the roiling feelings of pity, guilt, hatred, desire, annoyance, sympathy, and everything in between. 

It’s also just really hot.

The Handmaiden is a movie that is best enjoyed going in knowing as little as possible. That said, it is also a story with dark and often upsetting themes that are absolutely crucial to its narrative. If you are concerned about that statement,  I reccomend looking at the movies’ entry on DoesTheDogDie, which I have looked at and found to be a pretty comprehesive list of content warnings that can be examined in a way that doesn’t spoil the twists of the story.

Fingersmith - a novel by Sarah Waters

I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I swear I’m going to get around to it!! I can’t technically recommend the book that inspired The Handmaiden since I haven’t read it yet, but I have at least one friend whose opinion I trust who sings its praises, so it’s good enough for me. Besides, if the recent popularity of This Is How You Lose The Time War has showed us anything, it’s that people constantly crave stories about complicated women, so it certainly can’t hurt, right?

[risingsoleil]

Saw a post of someone saying that after everything lin has been through (su,tenzin,toph) she could have become a villain. Found this interesting and wondering if you had any thoughts on this? Idt she’d become a villain but tbh villain lin would be so cool. Or like lin leaving the force to become one of the mst powerful people vibes (beifong power?)

I'm pretty sure I've seen the same post! And I mostly agree with you.

Lin's experiences with her loved ones and the constant theme of abandonment is a set up for a villain origin story. The fact that Lin chooses to be a good guy and fight for others, to protect others speaks volumes on the type of character she is and her strength.

Main reason why I don't see her becoming a villain is because she compares her life to the public. As a police officer, she's seen women, men, children, elderly in abusive situations or has suffered in ways that she hasn't. To Lin, she downplays her own trauma and experiences because they're "nothing compared to what others go through."

She was not physically abused by Tenzin. He never tried to murder her.

Even if her mom wasn't around when she should have been, her mom's friends have stepped up in Toph's place to provide Lin with love and basic necessities.

Lin grew up privileged. She never had to worry about when she would eat next or not being able to go to school.

Lin didn't grow up in a war to see her friends or family killed every day.

The people Lin encounters in her job puts into perspective how "small" her problems are. Not to say that they're small, but Lin compares her problems with others.

(But I agree that Villain Lin would be soooo badass xD )

[crabs-with-sticks]

Has anybody else read The Art of Prophecy by Wesley Chu, because I'm honestly surprised its not more popular.

Its got such a great spin on the chosen one trope, where the chosen one is a boy who is kinda useless and very spoiled from the fact that nobody is going to question or hurt the Important and Powerful chosen one. Somehow though, he is still a very likeable character and its easy to sympathise with him in the later parts of the books.

So he's very much a whiny looser at the start, and it takes Taishi, an elderly grandmaster war artist who is very grumpy about leaving retirement to make him...not that. She was such a great character, simultaneously grumpy and sharp tongued, but a softy underneath it all.

Thats not even mentioning the other POV characters who are also amazing, cool, badass, and flawed, and also show that there is no good and evil sides in war.

For a book about a young male chosen one there are so many badass older women while the male characters are all way less cool and competent (said with the greatest affection). So, would highly recommend giving it a read!

[thebestusernamepossible]

Literally going insane, might have to write fanfic for the first time in 2 years because the people™️ do not get my favorite female characters like I do and I feel the insurmountable urge to write her. I’m going to bite drywall why don’t ppl see her complexities. PLEASE STOP WRITING HER ETHIER AS DOMICILE MOM OR BITCH (or just for shipping) she is so so cool please guys please.

Also while I’m here, fandoms tendency to shove women in the ‘pure powerful goddess who can do no wrong’ box and then proceed to never give them an actual narrative role other than like ‘supportive’ or ‘took out a few background guys’. Like why DOES this incredibly badass and complex female character just get shunted into doinging some cool flips, getting praised about it (she’s the strongest fighter, so feminist wow) then never getting actnowleged as a 2 dimensional character.

I saw this a lot when I was in the Batman fandom, particularly with Cassandra Cain. She is a highly complex and interesting character, but in fandom she’s kind of shunted to ‘Badass therapy dog who takes care of the men’. Because even on the slight chance her backstory is brought up it’s always never delved into and mostly used to make her etheir more tragic and in need of support on a surface level or to let her be compassionate with the men characters who get their actual problems foucused on. It’s a unqiue kind of frustrating because it’s like almost letting the cool female character be cool, but it’s more like the idea of a badass women is shoved in your face, maybe joked about (or if we’re lucky she gets to beat up a few bad-guys), but ultimately treated like a cardboard cutout. Interestingly this actually isn’t entirely a female character thing, it’s also common with like old grandfather/grandmother characters and the elderly in general. But it’s usually badass women from what I see. :/ Why can’t fandom explore their stories (people do but why is it so much less), why can’t they be the prtags of cool AUs or time-travel fix-its, or crossover events

Idk I think I’m just frustrated, and I typed out more than I thought I would. Also Ive seen what happens to some other posts complaining about fandom misogyny, so please know if you’re a TERF, fuck off you have no place in this discussion. We will never agree, and frankly all of these points apply to canon Trans Women characters. Don’t say shit ill fucking end you.

[thedawningofthehour]

I just remembered your post about Draxum wanting girls and just thought of this.

What Draxum wanted

What he got

If Draxum had raised the turtles he definitely would have thanked the titan for April when she inevitably arrived at his house.

BAHAHA.

It was actually Splinter who was hoping the turtles were girls! Not all four of them, he would have preferred a 2/2 or 3/1 split. (he probably would have preferred all girls over all boys though) The only male role model he had growing up was Grandpa Sho, and his feelings there were...complicated, to say the least. And he just thought little girls would be easier to raise. They're less rambunctious, right? They like to cuddle and play with dolls and tea parties? They'll be much easily on his elderly heart right?! (Splinter didn't know many little girls)

He was so relieved when they started bringing April home. Which was short-lived when he realized that she was just as weird and crazy as his sons were, but at least April didn't possess superhuman strength and endurance and wasn't as committed to dying horribly as his sons seemed to. You can even see it with Cass, he went "is this anyone's daughter" and didn't wait for an answer.

I'm trying to think, did I say Draxum wanted them to be girls? Sex didn't really factor into his selection process, he didn't intend for them to reproduce and the sexual dimorphism in the turtle species he picked was pretty small, and with the ooze twisting their DNA like a licorice whip it probably would have been inconsequential. Plus he was combining them with a male human, so a female turtle would likely be some level of intersex anyway.

Thinking of the turtles as his children, he probably would have had a slight preference for girls. He was closer to his mother than his father, spent a lot of time with badass warrior women, and had a twin sister. He had two nieces, until Pax decided he was a boy but that wasn't until he was a teenager. He feels more comfortable around women and has always related better to girls than boys.

But it really wouldn't matter that much to him. Yokai society doesn't give too many shits about gender, just because his sons were biologically male didn't necessarily mean he wouldn't be able to cry over his kid in a wedding dress someday. It was whatever to him.

[rpmemesbyarat]

I think there tends to be a perception that any work of fiction more than a few decades old is going to be riddled with cliches as well as full of horrifically outdated societal ideals. And I’m not going to say that’s completely incorrect, but it’s also not the case for many works either, including some of the most famous and formative ones.

For instance, let’s take fantasy.

The film “Willow” came out in 1988. It looks like it’s just going to be a straight Chosen One story. The evil queen is killing all the baby girls in the land looking for the one with the super special birthmark who is destined to defeat her, but the fated baby is smuggled away from her clutches just in time, and is found floating down a riverbank. I thought I was going to watch her grow up, discover her destiny and probably some special powers or swordfighting abilities she beats two-dimensional sexist boys with, and journey to heroically slay the queen in an epic showdown. But nope. She’s not named Willow, and she’s not the protagonist, and none of that happens.

The lead, Willow, is the father of the children who find her. They’re little people, and all played by actual little people. So right off the bat, we’ve got a disabled protagonist played by a disabled actor, and he encounters a lot of prejudice for it outside his village. He’s also unusual in that he’s a married father with kids, not some young attached swashbuckler/prince/pirate/etc. He very much WANTS to be a great sorcerer, but shows no actual magic talent. However, he is good at sleight of hand, such as his “diseappearing pig” trick. . . which ends up being his trump card at the climax with which he tricks the evil queen. But that’s just a distraction; the person who has a super badass magical fight with the evil queen isn’t him OR the baby, it’s an elderly sorceress he meets along the way who has beef with her. So the two absolute powerhouses of the movie who go head to head are two WOMEN, and not sexualized ones either. Granted, it’s hard to get more cliche than “evil sorceress queen” but her throwing down with the old crone was VERY unexpected for me! And the other lead female character is the queen’s badass daughter, a powerful fighter who begins on her side but sides with the heroes by the end.

But it’s not the old lady who defeats the queen either; she defeats herself when she tries to kill the baby, setting up a ritual to do so. When Willow tricks her into thinking he made the baby disappear and she moves towards him, she accidentally completes said ritual, causing it to destroy her as the target instead. At not one point in all of this did that baby ever show ANY magical powers or inclination of a special destiny; none of this would have happened if the queen hadn’t believed in this prophecy, for which there really was no proof, and acted accordingly. . . which is a piece of advice I’ve seen many a writer give for how to do the “Chosen One” trope well. And again, this movie was in 1988, predating all these writing blogs and advice channels. And what’s more, Willow doesn’t get real magic in the nick of time, there’s no Deus Ex Machina, he uses his own cleverness and the stage tricks he WORKED for. I really loved that. Again, it’s like something a modern writing blog would say they would totally love to see happen sometime!

The Last Unicorn film came out in 1982, but the novel was written in 1968. And yet, it averts a great many cliches about fantasy and gender in fantasy. The lead is female, and her motive has nothing to do with men. She has agency and takes action, and is very strong while not needing to make a big deal out of being “not like other girls” to do it (though she is definitely NOT like other girls, as she’s a unicorn in human form!) for this strength. We see her fend off a harpy, fight back against the Red Bull, and it’s mentioned she’s killed dragons before as well. Plus, she comes back in the sequel “Two Hearts” to finish off a griffin. Yet at no point is she an obnoxious edgy girlboss who shits on feminity; she’s in fact very feminine if she’s anything. And she does fall in love with a man, and this does have a big impact on her, but he’s not what her quest is about, and she in fact has to choose to give up being with him to complete that quest, and leaves him entirely at the end.

She also passes the Bechdel test; she talks with the witchy Mommy Fortuna who kidnaps her, trying to persuade her to free another female monster, the aforementioned harpy. And while she talk to her woman friend Molly about her love interest, their most iconic conversation is their first, and very feminist one, in which Molly angrily sobs demanding to know why the unicorn only came to her now, when she is no longer the innocent young maiden that unicorns are SUPPOSED to come to, but instead a haggard middle-aged woman who has been living with the leader of a bunch of bandits in the woods. Definitely not a demure virgin like the mythos say unicorns love. And yet, implicitly, the unicorn does not care.

And, of course, the unicorn saves herself at the end, and all the other unicorns in the world. It never presents itself as a feminist story, and I don’t think it was intended as such, but it sure qualifies in a number of categories.

For the final example, there’s The Lord of the Rings, written in the mid-50s. I actually haven’t read this series. But what I can comment on is something that was pointed out by someone on Tumblr (alas, I cannot remember the URL) that what so many of Tolkien’s imitators get wrong is they think that Aragorn is the protagonist, and make their Aragorn rip-off be so, but that actually the protagonist was Frodo, the literal little guy, the humblest of creatures, with no magic or fighting skills, and that this was the point. And I think that’s really interesting, that the father of modern fantasy and all its cliches, actually averted this cliche; it was only his many copycats that made it one.

These works were not, of course, perfect in other ways. There’s nary a scrap of POC or LGBT rep to be found in them that I know of. But they’re also far from cliche-storms in which every character is a cardboard cutout stock type and which every plot point is easily predicted either.

So, what is my point to this post?

It’s that older works are worth reading, or watching. Especially the genre-defining ones. These are some of the most famous, most far-reaching works of the fantasy genre in modern times, and that’s because they were GOOD. It’s not even about the box-checking aspect either; The Last Unicorn is heart-breakingly beautiful writing with a story and lines that make me more emotional than any other work ever has, book and film. Willow is a jolly good watch. The Lord of the Rings…ok, I’ll level with you, I just couldn’t get into it, that’s why I didn’t read it, but its significance to the fantasy genre is undeniable, and just because it wasn’t for me doesn’t mean it isn’t worth YOU giving it a shot. But so many people are just so sure that anything from before 2000 must be unoriginal, problematic garbage, and that’s reductive as well.

Besides the fact you’re missing out on things you might enjoy, reading within your genre is especially essential if you plan to WRITE in it, in my opinion. Whether this is fantasy, romance, sci-fi, horror, or something else, it is WORTH reading the masters. It is also worth familiarizing yourself with what’s ACTUALLY cliche, and what’s a DEAD UNICORN TROPE—I’ve read waaaay too many people who wrote what they clearly THOUGHT were very clever satires, but the things they were making fun of were never actually that prevalent in the genre to begin with, people just THOUGHT they were (ex: How many stories out there are there REALLY of princesses being rescued by dragons? Actually very few. But everyone lampshades it and references it and so on!) So it’s also worth reading what’s been done before if your plan is to parody, or satire, or deconstruct, or just do something new—that way, what you write will actually BE something new, instead of the eleven millionth author who thinks their protagonist is SO UNIQUE because they are a GIRL who FIGHTS omg!!

A lot of writers, both professional and aspiring, fear consuming work within their own genre, worried that they will be subconsciously influenced by it. They want their work to be wholly original, from their own imagination entirely. While I respect their choice, I also disagree that being inspired from other works is a bad thing. Inspiration doesn’t mean a direct copy. Indeed, I think people should in general stop stressing whether their work is a perfect unique snowflake untouched by any outside influence. All of us are influenced by something or other. And that’s fine. Every great work that you love was influenced by something else, consciously or subconsciously. Can you imagine if Neil Gaiman had decided NOT to write American Gods, and his own depictions of Odin and Loki, because he was a fan of Thor comics as a child (it’s what got him into actual Norse mythology!) and was worried that Jack Kirby’s version of the gods would influence his own? Ridiculous! Heck, I think it’s good to be inspired! To get ideas from other things! You just have to make them your own! And if there’s one thing that humans are goshdarn good at, it’s putting our own new spin on something we heard! That’s been how storytelling has worked since it begun!

And heck, why stop at reading the greats? Read the obscures and the flops! Read the worst shit in the genre! See what NOT to do, and think how you could do it better, and get the grain of a story from that! Get ideas from works in the genre that are forgotten or under-known! Use ideas from these that so many others have slept on, and expand them! For instance, look at the vampires of Paul Feval rather than Stoker or Le Fanu, for instance—if THEY had been the major media influences for Hollywood’s vampires, what would our modern depictions of these creatures be like? Use that as a jumping point for YOUR take on them!

Anyway, that’s all. I’m going to go watch The Dark Crystal now.

[abcdosaka]

I actually already caught up to Dandadan but I was reading it partially at work so I wasn’t really paying all that much attention. It’s even better the second time around now that I’m actuallly looking at it. It gives me that same “literally anything could fucking happen feeling” that gk has but in more of a jojo part 4 vibe instead of part 7. like it’s so weird and creative and out there. Also I love momo she’s such a good protagonist. I have to say the cursed house arc is still my favorite bc evil eye has the sauce and the kito grandma just entertains me so much but I did like the danmara arc for the ending. I am not immune to delinquent teenager and cop paternal figure bonding. plus Zumas whole backstory with his little brother and mom. I’ll never move past it. His little brother was so fucking cute and positive just a little sweetie pie no wonder the mom gave up after he died. Like yes she does have a whole ass other son but I get it. The whole family was so damn tragic

the space invaders arc I need to reread bc I genuinely think I paid attention the least there. But I remember it was good and vamolas backstory made me cry. Also I love the relationship between momo and vamola it’s sooo fucking sweet 💔💔 tbh I like all the girls. I like how the mangaka seems to have a lot of respect for elderly women it’s very cute how many major supporting characters are badass grandmas

[veritys-suspects]

My personal favorite suspects in each Mugshots installment

Stankowski Brothers: Muscles because he’s just a guy who loves his doggos :3

Notorious Gang of Four: BILLY CRIMP 1000% 🐧

Dentist Office Break In: Brace yourselves. This is gonna be a long one, folks.

In my humble opinion Chatty Cathy is THE best suspect in not just episode 11, but all of mugshots. For starters, she’s one of a sprinkling of female suspects in the show. Second off, she’s unique because she’s the FIRST female suspect, and also perhaps the shortest suspect, of all. Also, I like her look, and the fact that she NEVER stops talking, just like me! And last off, spoiler, she’s innocent! I know other people might have other favorite suspects, and I respect that, but to me, Chatty Cathy is the best!!

The Orchestra: All of them are pretty cool but I’m gonna have to go with Fingers Weinstock because from my child I always remembered he ate a traditional Italian meal of “LINGUIIINE FETUCCIIIINE AND CANNELOOOOONI”

The Lemon Sisters: This is a toughie because they’re all girls and I remember them from my youth but I’m going with Puddin because she’s innocent and likes sunflowers. But I love them all of course!!

Felonious Four: Sammy Six Toes because if there’s one thing I remember from that episode it’s that Sammy WAS IN ALASKA SNAPPIN PICTURES OF MOUNT RUSHMORE! Also I remember I used to be terrified of Lug Nut as a kid bcuz of the arrow thru his head

The Robber Barons: Lois probably because she’s the sole girl of the bunch YEEEHAW

Four Horsemen: Louis bcuz I like his vibe :)

Louis: why would I want a penguin??

Verity: why indeed 😌

Hatchet Gang: Baby Face, solely because I came up with the headcanon that he ACTUALLY owns a python and I make myself laugh thinking about that

Over the Hill Gang: Sergio. Now I have never actually seen the Godfather but I quite appreciate him anyway

“Come closer…CLOSER…now you listen to me, and you listen good…”

Circus: There is only one correct answer for this one. This suspect made Verity fall head over heels. I am actually the same height as this suspect but do not have that face or that figure. And most importantly, she was INNOCENT! Who else could it be but IVANA?

Baker St Gang: Hossenpfeffer because she was one of my favorites as a kid but I’m also a fan of Jimmy the Geek because I too am a bit of a geek

Out of Work Actors: Lollipop, she was one of my faves when I was watching as a little girl and I love candy! 🍭

The Petunias Baseball Team: I must confess I did NOT watch this one as a child, either that or I don’t remember it very well, but I like Bean Ball and Edgardo

Drag Racing Team: Dusty because she IS a badass and more importantly an INNOCENT badass!

“I didn’t leave my house yesterday, Verity. I was picking fruit in my backyard. Let’s see…i picked lemons, tomatoes, and avocados! 😒”

Group of elderly women: Constance not because she’s innocent but because she’s a baddie with a hockey stick and I love that for her

The Plug Uglies: Noseless, because I remember him as a kid because I was TERRIFIED as a kid and didn’t know special effects were a thing so I thought I’d literally just run into a nine foot nine Noseless guy on the street. But now I like him because he’s a farm boy:)

Thanks for listening to my Ted Talk I will never shut up

[djarindykes]

Your butch Din posts have got me thinking that my ideal Star Wars au is where everything is the same BUT: all the male OT characters are queer women. Luke? Dyke. Han and Lando? Bi dykes. Red and Rogue Squadrons? Dykes. Chewie? Wookiee dyke. I'm 100% serious about this. Because even when everything is the same, the entire original trilogy takes on a whole host of new meanings if all the men (and there are many) are women. Particularly, I think, in Luke's case.

DUDE FUCK yes oh my god everything about this is so so so so good WOOKIEE DYKES ARE EVERGTNINGGGHGGJHD

Every single thing about star wars would be so different if it was a band of queer women. I agree 1000% about luke. Dyke luke interests me just as much as butch din does because the entire protagonist, hero-boy type gets totally flipped upside down if the hero-boy is actually a hero girl!

luke wouldn’t be taken seriously. let’s just admit that and not kid ourselves. She would fight tooth and nail to show the galaxy that she deserves to be known as the galactic war hero that she is but in fucking *joker voice* society it would fall flat. Her looks would come into play. The men of the rebellion would get the credit. Her integrity would be questioned. It’d be a lot

But……to every little girl in the galaxy she would be a fucking MONSTER. A QUEEN. there wouldn’t be a single girl out there wasting away on tatooine without a luke skywalker ballpoint pen. or dreaming up in the sky about what it would be like to be a legend like her, a pilot, a jedi, a total badass. she opens up a window for soooo many dreamers and imaginative women in the galaxy who need a farm girl turned jedi to look up to

dyke luke would be angry at the galaxy. She’d want her credit. She’d be the face of a lot of galactic social issues without even necessarily wanting to be. She’s tired of being a political pawn. but she ends up living her best elderly Jedi life on ossus with her butch wife and heals from all of the mistreatment the Galaxy has thrown her way. she finds comfort and peace. She gives mouse-girl realness and looks like a little pixie

Luke and Leia as sisters…..hoooly fuck I’m gonna froth

[doukeshi-kun]

NIKOLAI SEWING !! I LOVE HIM ❗❗❗

the little detail of sewing stuff being in a box after cookies made me laugh so much this is peak and I bet he keeps it like that is because of his Ukrainian grandma who did the same

Also you just put Nikolai in glasses in my head and I am about to go insane he is so cute I want to squish his cheeks and pet him aggressively

nikolai being domestic is just so husband ughh😍😍😍

glad you got the cookies box reference hsgdhhshs my grandma (or any elderly women in the family tbh) used to put stuff in random container, like fucking raw fish in an icecream container💀 yeh thats the tmi for the day

nikolai with glasses would indeed look cute. CUTER. CUTEST🥰 i like to believe that nikolai wears glasses sometimes. it feels like his optometrist recommended him to wear glasses for most time, but he was like, "what about my badass card eyepatch >:("

[anthroparis]

thinking about how fucking good whip it is. oh my god. the way it represents femininity in such a humanizing way. the way it says that womanhood is subjective, that it's up to the individual to decide what being is a girl means to them. the way it tells us that femininity is not one thing, but a complex, layered subject, but it's also not the end-all. being a woman is infinite, it's layered, it's mixed, it's good and it's bad, it's messy and it's ugly, it's scary, but it's sacred- not in the mysterious way, but being a girl- whatever that means to you- is a relationship you build with yourself over time. it's not inherent. it's not set in stone. it's not a neat little list of traits you either meet or don't.

the scene where bliss is on the bus and there's an elderly woman who has blue hair. "I like your hair" "thanks, I do it myself!" the overwhelming sense of connection between two people who have nothing in common. the message that women don't just wilt to nothing when they age. the absolute beauty of individuality. the knowledge that women have always been defining themselves by their own standards, and always will. this scene alone carries 1000x more meaning and passion than anything that happened in the barbie movie.

the scene where maggie mayhem talks about her son. the message that motherhood is not the end of independence, that being a mom doesn't make you any less of a badass. the representation of girls who are not traditionally maternal breaking boundaries and being mothers, anyway.

bliss' entire arc. wanting to be herself. not wanting to be pressured into the traditional gender roles that dictate her life. going through heartbreak and realizing that it's not even close to the end of her story, because relationships don't define her. she's not a booksmart career woman, she's not a pageant queen, she's not a femme fatale, she's violent, she's messy, she gets ugly at times, she has no corporate dreams. she doesn't want to go to college, she wants to move to austin and do roller derby. the message that she is just as valuable and her dreams and wants are just as important as any other woman's.

this movie is so good. I love elliot page. I hope he knows that. I love drew barrymore too. thank you drew

[krahka]

For Cooper: 7 and 8 for essentials, 9, 10 and 11 for life, 2 for party? 😁

This got a bit long, but anyway, it's time for this asshole and his incredible sideburns. The man who looked at Anders and thought "I could make him worse" and somehow managed to succeed.

How do they dress in their downtime, while fighting, in formal settings, etc.

Cooper takes a lot more care in his appearance than it seems. Spends a lot of time making sure he looks the exact right amount of tortured and disheveled, cutting out sleeves on his shirts, tossling his sideburns just right to be just the perfect amount of scraggly.

If anything, he gets worse in formal settings, because he needs to convey to everyone around just how angry he is to be here and just how much contempt he has for the whole affair. If he could show up to fancy parties for Kirkwall’s nobility buck naked and screaming, he would. He can’t do that without getting arrested for public indecency, so he’ll have to stick to sackcloth jorts and yelling to get himself off the invitation lists.

This doesn’t apply quite as much with what he wears when he’s anticipating a fight. Chain mail, leather. There’s a reason people don’t guess that he’s a mage, but do guess that he’s up to crime.

Do they have any notable scars, markings, tattoos, etc.?

Fewer scars than you’d expect, Anders loses his mind trying to heal him up after a long day of battle and blood magic, but he’s still got a few. He avoids the wrists because that can get out of hand very quickly and that’s where Templars look, so he’s got some scarring on his fingertips and his lips that Anders wasn’t able to catch or do anything about.

The markings on his face aren’t tattoos, they’re makeup and he has to reapply it every day.

I do think at one point Isabela talked him into getting a tattoo and that’s why he’s got a skull on his bicep. It means nothing except that skulls are badass.

What do they do with their free time? Do they have any vices?

Is there a Thedosian equivalent of mahjong? Because there’s definitely some kind of intensely competitive gambling game that he plays with a whole bunch of little old ladies who all love and adore him and talk a lot of shit about Gamlen, because he used to be part of the group, but he got kicked out after a messy breakup with one of the old ladies. This doesn’t stop them from adoring his nephew. Cooper’s so much nicer than his uncle! What a charming young man! He probably has invited Varric and/or Isabela to their games, but they were both way too thrown off by the fact that he’s got this whole other friend group of elderly women who love to gamble in addition to the friend group they’re in, who are all bisexual fugitives who are absurdly toxic to each other.

His vices are all the crimes he does, and while he does enjoy it, most of it is for survival and to get rich quick. Also being absurdly toxic to his fellow bisexuals. He is a Dragon Age 2 character, after all.

Have they ever been seriously injured? What was the outcome?

His approach to blood magic is incredibly risky, even by blood magic standards. The fact that he’s self-taught means that he’s not super efficient, and his general tendency to push himself too far can get really, really bad when that involves how much blood loss he’s willing to inflict on himself. Sometimes this goes too far.

The worst it’s ever been was during the duel with the Arishok. His play was to get hit a lot to draw an enormous amount of blood that he could then call on to rip the Arishok’s veins out and bleed him from the inside. It was a very, very risky move, he ended up losing fingers in the process and nearly an entire arm, and once he got enough to get the power he needed to cast one, huge spell, he passed out. People watching thought they both died, especially since they didn’t recognize it as blood magic, just an unusually gory knife fight.

Anders had to squirrel him away to treat him and hide him from the templars. Weeks later, Varric had to track them down to convince them that a: everyone thinks Hawke’s dead and b: everyone wishes he wasn’t because they think he’s a great hero. Cooper was appointed Champion of Kirkwall at his own funeral.

Do they prefer being stealthy or charging head-on?

There are two strong, but contradictory impulses within him: one to hide, keep quiet, keep out of danger, and one to explode the organs of anyone who could even potentially threaten him.

I’d describe him as skittish more than anything else. He’ll start with stealth, but the second he gets uncomfortable or impatient, he will attack. He is very afraid of getting caught, and whatever method he can take, he’ll go with.

Which companions (or advisors) are they closest friends with? Who do they respect?

He agrees with Anders completely on all the things that matter, and the things they argue over don’t change the fact that they share the same goals. He admires Anders’ idealism and wishes desperately that he could match it. He’d do anything to make sure he never loses it. Anything.

I’m going to say that he dates Merrill briefly in Act 1, but she ends up deciding that they’re better off as friends. Once he gets over the sting of rejection, he realizes she was right. “We both like blood magic” is a poor foundation for a romantic relationship but a great one for a platonic one. The two of them study together, exchange ideas and techniques, generally have a blast. He’s not overly interested in history or stories or religion or anything that can’t help him in the concrete right now (that’s part of why things didn’t work out between them) but hey, it’s nice that she’s got something that makes her happy. Even if they’re so, so boring.

He’s not super close with anyone else. Cooper is kind of a surly asshole who keeps most people at a distance. If you get too close to people, they can be used to hurt you. The only person Cooper is willing to let hurt him is himself.

[childeproof]

me realizing the only way for u guys to know of my selfships is to talk abt them.. SIGH. anyways here are is the mortal kombat Selfship + self insert line up rn

jules janssen — she / her + some sick neos i’m pondering,, edenian

survived an assassination attempt, became part cyborg as a result, guards the royal line, belongs in a female rage compilation but also kins freminet genpact.. main character

shipped w: johnny cage, janet cage, + scarlet. AND erron black on occasion but it’s not permanent ( rip )

i think she’s the most known of my s/is but that’s bc I have an actual obsession with johnny cage and need mental help.. but also she’s rlly badass n fun

izana — she/they/it,, human turned goddess / spirit, she’s the embodiment of peace ( specifically peace after war or fighting )

“blessed” by the elder gods at a young age, she embodies peace in all of its forms. she spends her free time just adventuring, as she has nothing better to do. her job or role is to grant peace to people or places willing enough to fight for it. the whole “willing enough” thing is vague and she’s rather fickle so mercy ultimately depends on her mood

^^ she’s not morally bad or good, I think she’d be in a grey area. she can’t teleport, she can only be in one place at a time, but she can shapeshift

shipped w: havik and only havik.. I was gonna have her be shipped with a few other characters but she’s literally the divine peace to his human chaos what else needs to be said.. they need each other

eulalie — she/it

she used to be a gentle healer but she turned into an evil sorceress at the loss of her children ( two young girls and a boy ). she steals souls to gain power and control. sometimes uses young women as hosts ( like takes control of their bodies n whatnot )

more of an oc than a s/i but idc. she’s just a hurt mother okay..

btw all this happened like. thousands of years ago so now she just lurks the earth as a mythological figure. like it’s technically real her mythology but ppl view her as a story in modern times

very kind and protective of young kids, mothers, the elderly, and gingers of all kinds