#eggplant daughter happy birthday

[ladylooch]

Our Little Family [ Miles Wood] - Chapter 21 Family of 4 and the future.

Author note from 👢 anon: Hey b, I know you're not feeling well, and since it's been a while. Here, have some little family!! There is some smut here and miles being adorable. 

Two years since the day you said “I do” is the best day of your life. And of course the girls' birthdays are special for you. But marrying Miles wins. 

Last year, you guys did something small since you were pregnant and a little moody. Miles still took you out for dinner. He was amazing, especially you having your hormones all over the place. 

This year, he sent you and Lily for a mother and daughter date. El stayed with him at home. Having a six month old makes it a little harder for traveling during this time. So this time you guys will stay home. 

You and Lily have a special spa day. She's so big, and you're so grateful that Miles gave you this moment with her. You're doing the best you can to love her and have some alone time with her. 

You and Miles text each other a bunch of silly pictures of the girls. You send him Lily picking clothes, and he sends you El sleeping on his bare chest. 

You stopped to pick up your lingerie, and you sent Miles just the sneak peek of your burgundy and blue set. He texts you a bunch of emojis, and the best one is the eggplant there. You chuckle to yourself, Miles texts you to go pick something at the store for him. You go there before heading home. 

Lily is getting a little grumpy because she's sleepy. So it's time to go home. You needed this so badly, your man knows you. 

As soon as your car starts to move, Lily falls asleep in her car seat. You call Miles. 

“Hi, love.” he greets you, making you all soft. 

“Hey handsome. Can you do me a favor ?” You can hear miles moving around. 

“Yep, tell me.” You shake your head. He's so silly, and you love him. 

“We're a few minutes away from home, but Lily is sleeping. Can you come and help get her if El is not up ?” 

“Yeah of course, but you know El will be up.” He's not wrong. 

“Thanks, I'll see you soon. Love you and happy anniversary.” You can hear Miles smiling just the way he replies. 

“Love you too, happy anniversary, babe.” You smile before ending the call. 

You check Lily in the mirror, and she looks more and more with Miles. She's totally his mini.

Opening the gate, you see Miles waiting outside for you guys holding El all bundle up because it's cold. He makes her wave for you. She looks like she just woke. 

You put the car in park and Miles walks towards the car. He opens the door for you and leans in to kiss you. 

You kiss him, El's warm cheek before switching. You pick up El, and he moves to grab sleeping Lily from her carseat. 

“Babe, you can go inside. I'll take everything after Lily.” You're smelling El because you missed her baby smell. You blink at him. “Are you sure ?” He just smiles at you. You bite your bottom lip before taking her inside. 

You sit on the couch stripping and doing the same with El. Just catching up with your baby girl. Miles takes Lily to her bed and then takes the things he asked you to get for him.  

He's glad that you didn't look in your backyard. He comes to wrap his arms around his girls because he missed you. He kisses your hair as you rest against his body. 

“Thank you for today, babe. I needed it big time.” You can feel him smiling on your head. “You're welcome, my love. You deserve it.” 

You enjoy this moment being held by your husband while you hold your youngest. You're definitely having family cuddles later. You need Lily to be part of this moment, too. For now, the little girl will have her sleep. 

You lift your face to look at Miles. “Babe, did you make El do tummy time today ?” The look on his face shows he didn't. 

“Nope, we decided that we were going to cuddle the whole time.” You send him a look. “But… but babe…” He pouts, and you need to keep your posture because he's too adorable.

“Babe, you know she needs to do tummy time.” 

“I do, but she doesn't like it, and she's so cute.” You start to laugh, shaking your head. “I know we make cute babies, but she needs to do it, or she can't skate with you or play with Lily.” El shifts her head a little and coos. 

“See, she wants to play with her big sister.” Miles sighs because he's not winning this one. You peck his lips quickly before shifting to put El on the floor. 

You lay with her. At first, she struggles, but then she keeps going. You say that you're so proud of her. Miles takes at least five minutes to stare at your ass, and then he decides to join both of you. 

El makes her little sounds, you just stare at her. This is your life, 2 year anniversary with the love of your life, two amazing daughters. You really thought this life wasn't for you, but it is and you're going to enjoy every moment possible. 

After tummy time finishes, you shift to feed her. She likes that a lot. Miles stares at your face as your daughter eats happily. 

“Are you jealous, babe ?” Miles clears his throat. “Yeah, I am. I miss your boobs sweetheart.” You chuckle and mouth ‘soon’ for him. He likes that very much. 

For now, you're going to enjoy your love and this soft moment. 

“Hon, can you check if Lily is up.” He makes a funny face before you pull him for a kiss. “Look, I think she would like to see your face when she wakes up. I know, I do." That's all he needed. Miles' face lights up the room. He kisses you.

“Just like their mama, I see.” You shrug. It's not a big deal. You like to see that toothless face in the morning. 

Miles comes down with Lily in his arms, and you smile, seeing him with his mini. She wants to see her baby sister before El sleeps. Thankfully, El is almost finished with eating, and they can spend time together. 

While Lily holds El and talks to her softly, you ask Miles about dinner. He says that only Lily needs food to be cooked today. You're confused, but nod and go start her dinner. 

Miles will watch the girls while you prepare Lily's dinner. With El probably going to sleep soon, you guys will have some family love before both girls are sleeping. 

With both girls done for the night, you can finally have some alone time with your husband. But when you got to your room, Miles wasn’t there. The box he asked you to pick up for him is on the bed with a note on it. 

“Wear this and that lingerie ;) meet me in the backyard”  You shake your head but do that. 

When you get there, Miles is in his wedding suit, holding a bouquet to the most gorgeous backyard settings, a table for you guys to eat, twinkle lights, a new fire pit that you asked for him to do. Your hands go to your mouth as you walk towards him. He did this for you. That's incredible. 

He's incredible, Miles reaches for your hand, and you give it to him. He kisses you tenderly, making your knees feel weak. He gives you the flowers, and you thank him with another peck on his lips. 

Miles pulls the chair for you, and you thank him as he pushes your chair. You look around so amazed by what he did during the afternoon. Miles snaps a few pictures because you look gorgeous, but your reaction is better than he thought. 

“Happy anniversary, baby.” You clean your throat before looking at him. “Happy anniversary, hon.” You reach for his hand amazed by what he did. 

You guys have a really nice dinner. Miles pulled all the stops, and you're pretty sure it's the same chef from your wedding. You sneak a few gorgeous pictures of your husband while you guys eat. 

After dinner, Miles leads you for a dance, the same song you guys danced to on your wedding day. You rest your head on his shoulder. “You didn't have to do all of this.” Miles kisses your head “Yeah, I did, babe. I wanted this for our first anniversary, but you were pregnant and not feeling it. So, year two, I had to bring it up.” 

You kiss his chest, enjoying those strong arms around you. “I think, I'll never stop thanking you for our life. The life you gave me.” Miles lifts your chin to look at him. “The way that I see, you are the one that gave me this life. You took the chance on me, not the other way around.” You lift your chin for a kiss. Miles kisses you as you guys sway together to your song. 

Then Miles walks you over to the fire pit. He brings a mocktail for you and a drink for himself. He sits beside you, throwing an arm over your shoulder. You lean against him. 

“Best present ever.” Miles chuckles, kissing your head. You guys sit beside each other without saying much. The comfortable silence. You watch the flames dancing, the way they reflect on his ring. 

“Wait, did you put on your wedding band just for tonight?” You look at Miles a little surprised. “I thought it would be a nice look. It's been a while.” You nod because he doesn't wear his wedding band too much, just on special occasions. 

Your hand moves to play with his ring, Miles sighs. He knows that you guys have come so far, and he wants to apologize for everything that happened before. But he also knows you're not going to let him say anything.

You snuggle closer to his side, taking in his cologne and his presence. 

“Babe, are you going to let me ride you like our wedding night ?” Miles groans, throwing his head back. “Sweetheart, you're going to kill me like this.” You smirk, kissing his side.

You guys cuddle, enjoying the fire and the drinks. But then El wakes up, you hide your face on his side with a groan. He says that he'll check on her. You nod, saying that you'll be in bed. 

You lay in bed with your pretty dress waiting for your husband, and he's taking way too long to join you. You decide to get things started. You grab your toy and start to touch yourself. Not really bothering about taking the dress or the panties off. Just pushing the dress up and the panties to the side. 

You use the toy until you feel that you're wet enough, and then you slide a finger inside, building up. Miles opens the bedroom door. 

“babe, do you want dess…..” his voice trails off at the view in front of his. You with two fingers inside yourself pumping in and out. Miles groans as he locks the door. 

He moves to settle between your legs, pulling your fingers out. You whine and pout, but Miles already has your fingers in his mouth, licking them clean. You curse watching him tasting you. He leans to kiss you, then takes this moment to slide one finger back inside you, making you moan into the kiss. 

Miles smirks as your nails cling on his shoulders.

“I'm the only one who can have fingers inside you.” You sigh into his mouth as his tongue runs through your bottom lip. Miles takes a long, deep stroke with his finger inside you. He wants an answer. 

“Yeah, only you. Please, babe, give me more.” Miles nibbles your jaw. He's getting his way with you now. You buckle your hips towards his finger. Miles smirks, looking at you. He touches your boob over the dress. 

You moan as Miles slides in the second finger. He rubs circles over your clit with his thumb. The stimulation makes you get closer to your orgasm, but then Miles stop his movements. He makes you whine and you give him a pouty look. 

“Jerk.” Miles chuckles as he sits on his heels. He offers you a hand to help you up. You take it. He strips you out of your dress, and you help him take his suit off. You smirk seeing his bulge. You like that effect on him. 

He slaps your ass cheek before turning you around. You place your elbows on the bed while Miles runs his fingers through your folds. He hums feeling how wet you are. He pushes your underwear to the side giving him perfect access to your pussy. He runs his tip through your folds gathering some wetness, then he rubs his tip against your clit making your ass jerk towards him. 

Miles giggles and before you can say something he is sliding his cock inside you. You moan feeling every inch of his cock moving inside you. He brushes his finger along your spine as you adjust to his size. When you are good to go, you slowly start to move your hips. You can’t see but you're pretty sure he's smirking. 

And just like that, Miles take control over the pace. He holds himself by your underwear, creating a different friction for you. Occasionally, he slaps your ass cheek. When it hits your ass you throw your head back. You're a mess under him. Hiding your face on the mattress to muffle your sounds. 

The room smells and sounds like sex, the sound of how wet you are for him, his balls slapping your ass and your ass slapping his lower abdomen. Miles grunts, groans, and praise drives you insane. You mumble his name a few times, he moves his thumb to your clit rubbing circles. You cum so hard around him that he struggles to continue moving his hips. You are so tight. 

Miles curses as he moves his hips. Once he knows you are good, he pulls out. You whine feeling so empty. He sits beside you on the edge of the bed, you look at his cock wet and creamed with your cum. He smiles patting his thigh and you know what he means. 

You smile as you shift, but before you go on a fancy ride. You lick his length before taking him inside your mouth. Miles curses because that's probably one of the sexiest things you did in bed. He taps your cheek, he needs you to stop or he'll cum in your mouth. 

You lick and then kiss his tip before straddling him. You sink down slowly, bringing a throat moan from him. You sigh when he's fully inside you. Miles just stares at you. 

You kiss his jaw, then lips as you start moving your hips, Miles hands come to your hips, helping you keep the rhythm. Occasionally, you let Miles take the charge. But mostly it's you. 

Miles balls starts to get tighter by the second, he moves his hand to touch your clit to bring you over the edge with him. 

“C'mon babe…cum with me.” He's struggling, and you're going to help him. Speeding up a little plus his finger on you. Miles can't hold it back anymore. You feel his seed inside you, triggering your own orgasm. You milk Miles until his last drop. 

You rest your forehead on his, with your mouth open, catching your breath. Miles rolls both of you so you can be comfortable. He brushes his hand over the red mark on your ass. 

“Happy anniversary, baby.” You smile, kissing his nose. 

“Happy anniversary, love.” Miles gives you his signature smile. 

He gets up with you on his lap, carrying you to the bathroom. He lets you pee as he starts a warm shower. 

You guys shower together. Miles helps dry you. While you go through your night routine, he just watches you from the door. Then you guys move to cuddle to bed. Until your baby needs one of you. 

…….

Summer has been amazing. The girls are having a blast spending time with their grandparents. You definitely love the alone time with your husband. Reconnecting with Miles is something that you need badly. 

You loved being pregnant with El, but at the same time, you guys lost a little of that connection that you had. Now it's getting better and that's all that matters to you. 

Just spending a couple hours alone with him on the boat helps you. Being his wife, having his love is the most amazing thing ever. 

El's first birthday is coming up, so you guys decided to stay in Massachusetts to celebrate with his family. Today, you guys are out doing a few last-minute shopping with the girls. 

You guys decided to stop and eat dinner. Lily's face is covered with food, making El and Miles laugh as you clean her face. His genes are too strong even with their laughs. 

You smile at El as she opens her mouth for mMiles to feed her. Your daughters are the most amazing gift in your life. They're perfect in their own little way. 

You and Miles are talking about a few more things that you need to buy for the party. When you move your eyes, there is a person in front of your table. You don't recognize her at first, but then it hits like a bus, that's Miles ex. 

He looks at you, so worried that you're going to lose it again. Last time wasn't cool. You take a deep breath and offer her a polite smile. She asks about how you guys are doing, then asks about the girls.

“Our daughters.” The way Miles beams at your reply that's exactly what he needed. You don't want to sound petty or anything, but you say with your full chest that you guys are married now, that it's been two years, and you guys couldn't be happier. 

Something in her changes, she probably thought you brought your daughter to visit her dad, and you and Miles were done. She congratulates you guys and then leaves. 

Miles just looks at you in awe, your voice didn't change, your body language was the same, and you are so proud of being with him and being loved by him. This confidence is sexy and he loves it. 

As you guys continue to eat, his eyes change. He definitely has desire there. The girls finish eating, and you guys get ready to leave. While you put El in her stroller, Miles comes behind you. “I’m so turned on right now.” You just look at him blinking a few times. “Later Babe.” He squeezed your hips before helping Lily out of the highchair. 

You have El with you while Miles holds Lily's hand. You all leave the restaurant and go to a few more stores that you need to go to. At the second store, Miles is so damn grumpy that it's funny. 

“Babyyyy, please can we leave now ?” You look at him a little surprised. That's too whiney even for him.

“Babe, we have to buy a few more things before we go.” 

Miles pouts, and you shake your head at him. He moves closer to the girls for you to finish buying what you need. They're going to wait for you, because it's faster that way. 

You get everything that you need, then walk back to where they're waiting for you. You watch Miles with the girls; it’s clearly they're his daughters. Lily is his mini completely. El has Miles' bone structure and brow curls. She has your nose and your eyes, but she is still a Wood. El's personality is a little more similar to yours, but she still has her dad and sister’s golden retriever vibes. 

Miles spots you and smiles. Then he murmurs something to Lily, and she comes running to you. El follows slowly, holding her dad's big finger. You squat to hug Lily first and then hug El. You look at Miles with a smile on your face, hearing both of your girls say Mama. 

Moments like this show you that, choosing Miles before he did, then choosing Lily was the best decision you ever made, and El too. Having another baby was perfect. You get some kisses before Miles helps you get up. 

After paying everything, it's time to go home. With both girls secured in their carseats and everything in the trunk, it's time to go home. Miles drives, and you just chill. The girls are chatting away in the back. You look at them before checking the time, and boy, they're close to the girls' nap time, but it looks like they don't want to sleep. 

Miles laces his fingers with yours. He brings your hand to rest on his big thigh, close to where he wants your hand. You look at him when you feel his semi-erection. He just shrugs seeing your “how ?” Look. Now you understand why he was grumpy.

But for that to happen, the girls need to be sleeping. And the way they are right now, Mommy is not going to have a lollipop later. 

Getting home, the girls go to their playpen while you put everything away. Miles comes behind you, pinning you against the counter. You can feel his semi on your ass. You grind against him with a smirk. He holds your hips hard “don't be a brat babe, or I'll fuck you with the girls awake.” You need to cover your mouth to muffle your moan. 

He smirks because he knows he won this one. Miles kisses your neck before you guys listen to El calling for dada. “Get them to sleep, and we will have some fun after.” He agrees by kissing your cheek. 

You finish putting everything away for the party. You get to the living room, and the girls are still up. Miles is a little annoyed, and both girls are fighting their sleep. This went on long enough, time for mommy to step in. 

You sit on the floor with your back using the couch as support. You call for both of them to come cuddle with Mommy. They both snuggle one on each side. You wrap your arms around them and kiss their heads. You hum a lullaby while playing with their hairs, just like you do with Miles. 

The girls hold hands over your stomach as their eyes start to blink. Miles just stared at you in awe. 

“How ?” You smile for his picture and then shrug.

“I have my ways too. They go down easier for you, but you know I have to survive the road days.” Miles chuckles and nods. 

Almost 10 minutes later, the girls are out in your arms. Miles carries one by one before he comes to get his main girl. He pulls you into his lap, crashing his lips so hard on yours. He curses against your lips. 

“Fuck I wanted this since the restaurant.” You pull back looking at his gorgeous blue eyes. 

You just stare at him, as much as you would like to know why. You don't have much time, you'll find out later. You crash your lips on his as you start to grind. Miles moans into the kiss. He hooks your legs around his waist and gets up from the couch. Carrying you upstairs, stops kissing you so he can see, but you kiss his neck instead. 

You're making this very hard on him, and you enjoy it. Miles places you in the bed after locking the door. You reach to take his shirt off while he works on your pants. 

“I love it when you're confident, babe. It's so damn sexy.” You smile, digging your heels on his ass bringing him close. Miles chuckles before connecting your lips again. You reach for his cock, stroking over his sweats. 

That's all you kids need right now. Miles works on getting you wetter and ready for him. Can't lose much time with two girls at home. 

This time, it's a little needy and fast. But it's amazing as always. You and Miles just stare at each other with the softest smiles ever after having sex. 

Miles draws little circles on your shoulder blades. 

“Babe…” Miles calls for you, and you shift a little to look at him better. “Yeah ?” He smiles, making you all soft. 

“Do you like this house ?” You don't know where this is going, but you can see that he thought about this.

“For the summer, I do.” He nods “and for living here ?” He's not making any sense for you, but you know this is important for him. 

“What do you mean ?” Miles shifts so he can look at your eyes. “You know, for when the girls are in college and I'm retired. I love Massachusetts, and I would like for us to live here when I'm done." Now he makes sense. 

“Oh, so we're discussing this now ?” Miles gives you his ‘I'm sorry’ look, but nods. You shift again, sitting against the headboard and putting your shirt back on.

“Okay, I like Colorado, and I kinda knew this is where you want to be after you called it quits. Just didn't think we would have this conversation so early…” You squeeze his hand. 

“...I'm going to be where you want to be, I'm certain of that. But no, I don't like this place to live for the rest of our lives together.” Miles smiles, feeling much better about this, and he kinda was hoping you would say that. 

“So what do you think if we bought land here and built our dream house ?” You look at him in disbelief. This man is crazy. “Miles are you sure ?” He looks at you with a pout because you called him by his name. 

You shake your head at him and peck his lips. He smiles again. 

“Yeah, babe, I'm sure. I want us to have our dream house. I want you to have your dream house. You do so much for us and never ask anything. I want to give you this and so much more.” You hold his hand.

“Okay, we can start looking next summer. But it's going to be your house too, okay ?” He nods and kisses you before you need to get up and pee. 

On your way to the bathroom, you ask him to check on the girls. And he does exactly that. You find Miles close to El's room door. He pulls you into his arms for you to look. Lily is in bed with El. They're giggling and talking to each other. You relax in his arms, watching your two girls. 

“We're so lucky.” He kisses your head in agreement. 

You guys got so lucky with the girls.

[nonbinary-octopus]

She turned seven!!! :D

Happy Birthday, Alexis!

She reached the highest tier of learning a day or two before her birthday, too, so she gets the best growth moment possible!

I figure, if she likes archotechs, definitely she would like to have a passion about crafting. Also the colony could really use a second person who cares about crafting... currently we've only got Neme doing any crafting, and she's also one of our two cooks.

We also desperately need another plants person, as Zornie is the only person here with any skill in plants whatsoever.

And art, cause Jam's the only artist.

... I guess she's getting a passion from each of her parents. Nice.

I debated a little bit between Kind and Beautiful, but decided to encourage her to be Kind. I think it will serve her better in the long run.

related... yesterday this happened. Alexis made fun of Lips for having been engaged and then broken up with, and then a little bit later they had a chat about "eating eggplants"

as I happened to see Lips give his three-year-old daughter Lina the birds and the bees talk a few days ago, plus considering their last interaction, I have to wonder if that was a euphemism...

[sem-voids]

happy birthday mash!

Day 1368

It’s Mash’s Birthday! Please appreciate her extra hard.

[mahvaladara]

For the OC questions (Sorry for being so late, been a busy.. gaming wise, weekend!) 90-100 for Mal 1-10 for Annika 20-30 for Maeve 40-50 for a teenage Syra perhaps?

[Ga]Mal[l] Sullyvan

90. What is their occupation?

Gamall is a full-time Wanderer, which is a type of Valasyr who specializes in wandering between cities, countries, planets, and even universes seeking to harness as much knowledge and power as possible. They are also often called knowledge and power devourers.

Currently, Gamall is a full-time Biologist and freelance Gardener.

91. Do other characters respect your OC, if so, is it out of fear? Or do they respect your OC because they like them?

Depends. His family respects him dearly. From where he came he was respected out of utter fear. But those days are in the past and he is living a new life and earning respect by hard labor.

92. If they were given minutes to live, what would they do? Who would they want to see and say?

Gamall once was in this position, and he had wanted back then to see his former wife Caitlyn and former son Seimei before disappearing. He went and got a few last minutes with them, but he didn't die. He wished he did. For time came to claim Caitlyn eventually, and as for Seimei, he killed the boy when he came seeking "revenge" for the death of his father.

He now has come to the conclusion that if death ever comes for him, it's not like he can prepare for it. So he lives every day as if he only had minutes to live, seeking to amass as much fulfillment as he can, rather by the form of material goods, personal knowledge, spiritual power, hedonistic pleasure, or life experiences.

93. How do they deal with stress?

Gamall is already quite the shittalker and blabbermouth, but when under stress that becomes worse. But he is paradoxal and it mostly depends on the type of stress, it can either be met with agression or silence and either of the two are always foreboding.

94. Do they have a more submissive or dominate personality type?

Versatile personality. Gamall adapts well to the people around him, but he is not a pushover and he despises whoever tries to dominate him by force. He does enjoys playing the sub as much as the dom and though Gamall can actually be very manipulative, it is not on his interests to dominate or command others, usually his manipulation only working to make sure people don't bother him.

95. Do they have a pet?

Currently no. But they'll have a lot of chickens and a lot of cows.

Gamall used to have a horse called Eggplant, but there's a running gag that if he gets a horse it'll die, so... yea, that happened.

96. Do they have a stash of weapons?

Pffft. They don't exactly need too, they can kill you with their mind alone, but this is the type of asshole who will kill you with a duck if you tell him he can't.

97. Where do they live? Who do they live with?

The farmlands. Gamall isn't keen on big cities or places with a lot of people around because it usually means trouble and pain for him and he'd rather not.

98. How do they calm themselves down?

Depends. He has found out that addressing a fireball to whom it may concern is a great way to calm down, but he can't exactly commit capital murder everytime someone annoys him. Gardening currently has been providing him a lot of calm and quiet he needs.

99. Are they co-dependent?

No.

100. Are they a day, or night person?

Night person, it helps that he doesn't need sleep.

1. How do they present themselves to others?

Anika comes off as a smart, kind and fun girl, your level-headed rich girl who's always had everything she needed.

To her dad however, she's a rebelious teenager finally breaking free from a sheltered and controled life. She is finally learning magic rather he wants her to or not and continuing on his footsteps trying to find a way to return Apollo's heart and find a way to save Arlo.

2. Do they like animals?

Yes. Anika had a cat as a child, but due to her mother's illness she had to give away the cat. After her mother passed away, Anika and Apollo adopted a dog. Anika ended up being the one to keep the dog, since Arlo hurt their dog when they tried to take it to Apollo's home.

3. How do they dress?

Anika dresses in a very sporty rich way. She prefers wearing high end sports clothes, leggings, crop tops and track suits, anything she can move well in and exercise in. Sometimes she pairs them with fishnets and accessories that give her a more sporty witch feel.

4. How many languages do they know?

Anika speaks english and spanish.

5. How big is their family?

Currently it's just her and her father. Her mother used to be around but she was killed by an unknown dragon who her father refuses to name.

6. What is their purpose in the story?

Anika is Apollo's best friend and girlfriend, she is also a witch and a dragon hunter, who is currently aiding Apollo in finding a cure for Arlo's rot the same way her father before sought her mothers. After her mother's death, Anika decided she had a duty to Apollo to help him save her brother, as it was Anika who lured Arlo to the trap.

7. Do they know how to fight?

Anika is petite, but Anika can kick your ass. Her father taught her kickboxing.

8. What is their back story?

Anika is the only daughter of Isaiah and Melantha Lorenn, she moved with her father to Windenburg when he was offered a position as a principle at the school. She lived a pretty uneventful life despite her father's side work as a dragon hunter and spellcaster. Anika herself was a powerful spellcaster but her father kept her away from the major things he was doing. Eventually, Anika fell to a trick to capture the two child dragons, her best friend Apollo and Arlo.

9. Why is their name, their name?

I really liked the sound of Anika, and since Isaiah and Melantha also had unique names, I wanted Anika to have a name that would feel like she's a girl born into the 1%.

10. Do they have any nick names?

Ani, by Apollo, Queen B(itch) by Arlo. Princess by many of her school peers.

20. What do they look like?

See thee above.

21. What are their hobbies?

Maeve's hobbies include watching football and baseball games, writting research law papers, cooking and working out.

22. What are their ticks?

Their what?

23. Do they like children?

Maeve has five children, her eldest twins Arlo and Apollo, her middle daughter, Syracusia, and her youngest twins Talia and Dimitri.

24. How do they react to being around wild animals?

Maeve is pretty brave and adventurous but as most people she tends to avoid wild foxes and other animals.

25. If they were given the task to prank someone, who would it be, what would they do, and would the prank work?

It would be Mal and it would be the yelling "I feel good!" prank when he was busy spraying bugs, doing the laundry or when he's vacumming.

26. Do they have any survival skills?

Yes, she can pitch a tent, filter water and cook most wilderness food. She also knows how to hunt, since her father enjoyed hunting pigeons, ducks and rabbits. She knows how to make a snare trap.

27. Are they more book smart or street smart?

50/50. She's very book smart when it comes to education and law, but has a lot of street smart when dealing with her clients, and the cases she has. She knows what the jury are more likely to simpathise with and usually builds her case defense around this.

28. How do they get out of a difficult situation?

Usually by trying to solve it. If she can't solve it, she asks for help, but she is not one to run away from a situation.

29. Do they use their body, mind, personality or force to get what they want?

Personality and smarts.

30. What music do they enjoy?

Maeve enjoys rock, old school rock and roll.

40. How do they become who they are?

Syra is the lucky three. She has a very calm and uneventfull life despite what luck befalls are siblings, and she is lucky to get two younger siblings, so she never got very cotroling parents breathing over her shoulder, so she was allowed to be herself. She has a very supporting father in Mal, who supports her every decision, and a big brother who loves her and whenever he is well, Arlo will go with her to do whatever she wants.

41. How was their childhood?

She had a happy childhood. Though they moved when she was a kid, she was young enough for it to not cause a negative impact on her growing up. At the contrary of her older siblings, Syra wasn't forced to go to a private school, and being in public school allowed her to be a regular girl without the pressure of being examplar.

42. Are they close with anyone who is going to screw them over?

One of her friends is a mooch, who's only around her to get good grades and to steal her stuff, she doesn't know this yet.

43.How do they adapt to different situations? Do they adapt at all?

Syra adapts pretty well to her surroundings and situations. She's a versatile girl who knows she has parents and siblings who will help her if she needs.

44. How do they speak? Examples - Are they soft spoken, hot heated, vulgar

Syra is soft spoken, quiet and calm.

45. Are they opposed to violence?

Very much. Syra grew up watching her two older brothers getting into very violent altercations, especially when Arlo was feeling well. She usually would get in the middle of the two. She now knows why they'd fight.

46. When is their birthday?

Syra was born in Autumn, I think.

47. Are they quick to judge?

Not really. Syra is very empathetic.

48. Do they have anything they are trying to hide from others?

No.

49. Do they act different around different people?

No.

50.Do they enjoy the arts?

Syra enjoys theater, film and music.

[toruhalo]

Psychotic (1/?)

Pairings: Ledger!Joker x Female OC

Wordcount: 1445

Warnings: conversations of violence/murder, explicit language

A/N: A special thank you to my friends @fallingthroughstairs​, @ladyoftheseastuff​ !!

previous chapter: prologue

next chapter: 2

masterlist

On the daughter's eighteenth birthday, she was transferred to Arkham Asylum from her in-patient psychiatric unit. The doctors confirmed her mental state did not improve, and psychiatrists within the asylum agreed they would handle her case. Passing cells, the girl recognized notorious criminals from the news. As she settled into her cell, she heard many cellmates yelling across the hallway at each other. She cowered into the corner where her bed sat, hoping to not encounter anyone.

"Hey, you," a voice called.

She looked up to discover a man in the room diagonal from hers. He was covered in gnarly looking scars and wore an unsettling smile. She quickly looked down, pretending she couldn't hear. The man huffed and banged against the bars, "I'm talking to you, plum tips." Until that moment, she had completely forgotten the ends of her hair were purple.

She finished blow-drying her freshly dyed hair, feeling defiant yet gratified with herself. A part of her was shaking in fear of how her parents would react, but that was the point. It was a symbol of recalcitrance.

Tiptoeing out of the bathroom, she ran straight into a body. The body disclosed itself as her one and only father. He seized her by the shoulders, ready to ram her to the side until he saw her head.

"You look like a fucking eggplant," he said while staggering away.

That had been three years ago, only a week before the incident. The doctors never bothered cutting her hair, and it never crossed her mind. The man within the enclosure crossways from hers began to spit out profanities, causing a guard to rush over.

"Shut the hell up!" the guard yells.

A soft snicker was then heard from the pitch-black cell directly across from the girl's own. She tried to see who belonged to the sound but detected no movement within. Her environment might be affecting her mental state, she thought.

Standing in line at the cafeteria, the girl directs her eyes to the ground. She hastily obtains her food and secures an unoccupied table, next to a couple of guards. She picks at the poorly made steak fingers, not finding anything appetizing. The room began filling with muffled laughter and the occasional one-sided conversation. Guards strolled between tables but paid no attention to the inmates. Some were pretending to write on the walls, while some just stared off into space. She was gratified she wasn't at that level of insanity, at least not yet. After a while of taking small bites of food, a towering broad-shouldered man approached her table.

"Is this seat taken?" he asked. She shook her head in response. He smiled politely and set his tray down beside hers.

The air between them infused with uncomfortable silence. The girl never once looked up from her lap, playing with a stray string on her striped outfit. The man coughed once he finished his lunch.

"Are you going to eat those?" he points at her tray. She follows his finger to the baby carrots rolled off to the side. She repeats her head shake from the first encounter. The man whoops in delight and scarfs down the orange vegetables.

"I'm Matthew, but my friends call me Sharpener. Nice to meet you," the man grins while extending his hand. The girl pulls her sleeve over her hand and mutually gives a handshake.

"W-where did you g-get the name Sharpener from?" the girl mumbles in question. Sharpener turns in surprise, not expecting her to talk. He laughs, "Oh, I put this guy's finger in one. It was hilarious." They both started laughing together, not aware they were being watched from afar.

“I want a nickname," the girl whispered to herself while lying face-up in her cot. She hated her birth name, Lauren, for several legitimate reasons. One, her parents administered it to her. Two, it sounded like a stuck-up popular girl's name. She sat up and began looking, maybe something would come to her. She gazed at her reflection from the metal frame of the cell bars and saw her aqua eyes. "Blue? No..." She caught a glimpse of her long hair, "Purple? Plum? Violet?" The preceding one caused her to stop. "Violet," she repeated. Purple was her favorite color after all.

“I like it."

Violet yelps and jerks her head around. A resounding cackle follows after her evident panic.

"Why you all... jumpy?" The voice continues. The man who bothered her not even five hours ago has been relocated for violent behavior, so she was the only one left in the hallway. Violet registers that the sound is coming from the dark ominous cell directly across. She grips the edge of the blanket, shifting it up closer to her chest.

"W-who are you?" Violet asks.

"Me? I'm a voice... a voice you've got buried so far down in your pretty little head. Or maybe it's coming to the surface... Stuffed under layers of societal teachings, that is just itching to get out..." After the last word fades into the depths, the owner of the strange vocalization came up to the bars.

He was lean and wiry, with an angular jaw and impressive bone structure. His sinister brown eyes were hooded with interest and adorning a broad charming smile. Atop his head was unwashed shoulder length dirty blonde hair with a hint of green. Attached to his cheeks were deep scars stretched from the corners of his mouth to his ears. People might say the scars were ugly, but Violet thought they merely added to his allurement. Violet could feel her heart pounding fiercely within her ribcage, but was she excited or scared?

 "Joker...?" Violet recalls doctors gossiping over that name during her hospitalization. They described him as a man who had a sharp Glasgow smile and wore clown makeup. Rumored to be the one who pushed Batman to kill Harvey Dent.

“One and only..."

“Are y-you not allowed to wear f-face paint here?" Violet questions.

The Joker smiles even wider, "No... It's against their code." He pauses to tilt his head. "Why do you ask? You want to see me in my best moments?" The accusation makes Violet flush a fiery red on her cheeks. In all honesty, she did want to see that. She wanted to see what made him... him.

"N-no, I was just curious..."

"Well ya know, curiosity killed the cat. Slaughtered him in pieces actually..." He giggled to himself. The joke made a small smirk to appear on Violet's face.

The Joker hummed to himself and itched his greasy head. "So... Why you in the loony bin? Ya got a... mental problem?"

 Violet averted her eyes and swallowed what felt like a thousand needles in her throat. "I-I killed someone."

"Classic... Who was it? Boyfriend? Girlfriend? Stalker?"

"Dad."

He chuckled and leaned his forehead against the cold bars. "Tell me more."

"My parents... abused me all my life. I never knew happiness around them. I began to have dreams about killing them and decided to go through with it. My mother got away, and I still think about it every day. And I don't regret killing him, not one bit. He deserves to rot in hell for all I care." Violet grips the edge of the bed harshly with whitening knuckles.

The Joker licks his lips and whistles lowly. "Quite a story... You want to... uh... know something?" Violet looks up in interest.

"You didn't stutter," he says with half-lidded eyes.

Violet straightens her posture, "O-oh. I-I guess I got too focused." “Mhm." Joker slowly sits down, laboriously dragging his hand against the bars. Violet leans eagerly closer to observe his hands in motion. His fingernails were overgrown and hid some dirt and grime underneath. The creases on his palms were discolored, might've been from all of the face paint and a distinct lack of hygiene. "So," Violet clears her throat," H-how did you get caught? O-or was it your plan?" The Joker huffs and picks at his pant leg. "I wouldn't call it a... plan. I'm flexible, and uh... very unpredictable." She also overheard rumors he was a genius in planning his next move, especially with Harvey Dent and the girl named Rachel. His previous statement puzzled her, but maybe he didn't see himself as a guy who made plans. "The Batman hung me upside down on a ninety-story building... the uh SWAT team got me," he interrupts her thoughts. "T-that must've been s-scary."  "Not if you're the scary one."

[mldrgrl]

Ordinary People

by: mldrgrl Pairing: Hank Moody/Stella Gibson Rating: PG-13 Summary: In the Hanella universe, March 15th is Hank’s birthday.  Today is March 15th.  Also, in the Hanella universe, there is no coronavirus.

A/N: I usually don’t do these, but I just need to say, my creative drive is at an all time low.  I’ve tried to get a few Hanella stories off the ground for months, with no success.  I wanted to have this prepared for this morning, but it took me a painfully long time to put this together.  With all the panic and anxiety happening around me, us, the world, hopefully this is a small contribution to put a smile on a few people’s faces.  Stay safe everyone.

Hank likes Sunday mornings the best.  By virtue of a long-held agreement, Sunday mornings are unhurried and unplanned.  Afternoon brunch with Becca is usually on the calendar, but the mornings belong to them.  That’s why, when Stella’s cellphone rings at 9am, and she answers it, Hank rolls over with a disgruntled groan.

“Of course,” Stella says, slipping out of bed and Hank’s searching grasp.  “Yes, of course.  I’ll be right there.”

“Timeizit,” he mutters, coming up on his elbows, face scrunching as he struggles to fully open his eyes.  “Where you goin’?”

“Go back to sleep,” is all she says, and then she disappears into the bathroom.

Hank flops back down to the bed and buries his head under the pillows.  He tries to fall back to sleep, but he knows it’s futile.  Groaning again, he sits up and swings his legs over the side of the bed.  He jams one fist against his eyes, rubbing the sleep out, and searches the floor blindly for the pair of shorts he’d whipped off and slingshotted at Stella the night before when they were on their way to bed.  He knew they’d landed there somewhere.  

Stella comes out of the bathroom in a peach silk camisole and navy blue panties.  He perks up a little as she crosses towards him, but she’s only there at the side of the bed to retrieve her diamond earrings.  As she afixes them in her ears, he hooks an arm around her waist and drags her into the space between his open knees.  

“Go back to sleep,” she says again.

“Who was on the phone?”  His voice is muffled as he rubs his face against her hip and tries to nuzzle her panties aside.

“School.”

“On a Sunday?”

“I just need to run up and take some exam notes around to my TA.”

“Can’t you email them?”

“I’ll be quick.”  She wiggles her hips out of his clutches, but he pulls her back in.

“I can be quick too.”  He gets his fingers under her panties to squeeze her right asscheek and tugs the left side down at the hip.

“Later, Watson.”  She pushes him gently, but firmly away.  “I’ll make it up to you later.”

He rubs the back of his head and unhappily watches her get dressed.  It takes her less than two minutes to get into a pair of black, cropped pants, and a black and white striped sweater.  She pulls on a pair of black flats and then she’s gone and he still hasn’t found his shorts.

Two hours later, Hank has showered, fiddled with the latest chapter of his novel, and accidentally watched an episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, but Stella isn’t home.  He receives a text at 11:30: Work issue to resolve taking longer than anticipated.  Meet at Sarabeth’s for Becca brunch at 1. x - Sherlock.  Because he’s annoyed, he texts back a sad face and an eggplant, hoping she feels guilty for leaving their bed for work.  And he really wants her to know how unhappy his dick is about it.  She doesn’t respond.

It’s a nice, unseasonably warm and sunny day with a cool, but gentle breeze, so he decides to walk to the upper west side to meet his wife and daughter.  It takes a little more than an hour, and on the way, he feels guilty for trying to make Stella feel bad, so he stops and buys her a bouquet of blue roses.  He probably has something to apologize for to Becca as well, so he gets her a colorful arrangement of daisies.

He’s early by ten minutes to Sarabeth’s and heads inside to try to get a table for three.  He doesn’t have to though.  He spots Becca at an upper level table and she waves at him.  He points out his party to the hostess and then ascends the staircase, two at a time.  It’s obvious to him something’s fishy by the wide smile on Becca’s face.  Stella’s back is to him.

“Milady,” Hank says, handing Stella her bouquet.  He presents the other to Becca with a nod.  “Mi-other-lady.”

“What’s this for?” Stella asks.

“Being a general pain in the ass,” he answers as he sits down beside her.  She laughs lightly and he places a lingering kiss to her cheek that she leans into.  He catches the hand she lifts to stroke his face and kisses her fingers one by one and gives her hand a squeeze as he pulls away.  

Becca still has the mysterious grin plastered on her face.  Hank eyes her suspiciously.  “Have you been dabbling with nitrous oxide, Daughter?”

“Can I give it to him?” Becca asks, shifting her eyes between Hank and Stella.  She looks ready to burst with excitement, so much so it’s palpable.

“Go on.”  Stella nods.

Becca turns and reaches into her bag.  She pulls out a shoebox-sized package wrapped in silver paper and passes it over the table to Hank.

“Me?” Hank asks, accepting the package.

“Happy birthday!” Becca exclaims.

“Oh…”  He’s forgotten.  Never much of a celebrator of birthdays, he’s forgotten that today was March 15th.  He looks from Becca to Stella.  “You two conspired on something?”

Becca nods and grins.  “Open it.”

“Alright.”  

Hank tears through the silver paper and uncovers an old, wooden cigar box.  It’s got more depth to it than boxes he’d ever seen before, fitting at least four rows of cigars deep by his estimate.  And it’s weighty, so he doesn’t think it’s full of cigars.  He flips up the aged metal latch at the front of the box and inside is a book.  Not just any book, a hard copy, possibly first edition of Call it Sleep by Henry Roth.

“Oh,” he says.  

“Keep opening!” Becca orders.

“Okay, okay.”

On closer inspection, before he even opens the book, he can see something is off about it.  The pages seem strange, like they’ve been altered somehow.  He opens the cover and on the inside is a small manila sleeve, stamped with PROPERTY OF MIAMI BEACH SENIOR HIGH SCHOOL.  There’s even a checkout slot still embedded inside with return dates back to the 1940s.  The copyright page indicates that it is not a first edition, but a fifth.  He starts flipping the pages and that’s when he’s able to see how unique this book really is.

“What in the hell,” he murmurs.  Pages have been replaced with handwritten notes.  There are photos embedded inside.  Polaroids, even.  Part of the book has been hollowed out and a tiny bottle of airplane-sized Jack Daniels has been nestled inside.

“We called people,” Becca said.  “Friends and stuff.  Mom helped.  Asked them to personalize something for the book for you.”

“All these notes and things are…”

“From everyone.  Aunt Heather, mom, me, Stella, Fish, Charlie, Marcy-”

“I miss that bald little creep and Cokey Smurf.”

“Fish added the bottle of whiskey.  He said to tell you there’s an adult-sized one waiting for you next time you come up to the house.”

“The Trout’s a good man.”

“We’ve been working on it for over a year.”

“Over a year?”  Hank looks up, incredulous.  

“It took awhile to get from person to person.  It was Stella’s idea.”

He tries not to look surprised, but he can’t help it.  Stella has never revealed a creative side to him.  “Really?”

“Something I read about.”  She waves a hand, dismissively.  “I didn’t invent the concept.  I just thought it might be something you’d enjoy.”

“I do.  It’s really...it’s just really...”  Hank stops.  He finds himself choking up a little.

Stella leans over, kisses his ear and whispers, “Happy birthday, love.”

“Which pages...where do I find your notes?” he asks.

“Read them later.”

“Aunt Heather painted silhouettes of the city skyline on some of the pages,” Becca says.

“I’m going to go over all of this with a fine tooth comb when I get home.  Thank you, ladies.”

“And Karen,” Stella adds.  “She was the perfect liaison.”  

“I can’t believe you guys did this.  I can’t believe anyone would do this.  For me.”

“We love you.”  Becca smiles broadly and then gets out of her seat.  She gives Hank a hug and then straightens.  “Have to run to the bathroom.  Be right back.”

When Becca leaves, Hank turns to Stella.  “You didn’t have to go up to work today, did you?”

“No, I had to pick up that box.”  She nods down to the cigar box on the table.  “We were able to acquire it last minute from a flea market auction and only had a small window of opportunity to pick it up.”

“This was really incredible.  Thank you.  I can’t wait to find what you contributed.”

“I haven’t added mine yet.”

“No?”

“It’s with me.  It’s just too...personal.”

“Something you wrote?”

She nods.

“Will you read it to me later?”

“No.”

“No?”

“You can read it yourself.”  She blushes and turns her face away from him.  

He runs his fingers through her hair and then cups her cheek and brings her gaze back to his.  “Do I get a birthday blow job tonight or is this old library book my only gift?”

She chuckles and takes up the bouquet he’d given her from her lap to smack him on the leg with it.  He kisses her once, twice, and then goes in deep on a third.  She’s breathless when he pulls away.

“I love you, Sherlock,” he says.

“Happy birthday, Watson.”

The End

[butididntpourthewhiskeys]

50 Things I’m Convinced Tay & Joe Do - Part 2

1. Joe standing in front of the mirror and checking his outfit for the hundredth time before visiting her parents. He’d then constantly walk up to her, asking “Does this look alright? Or is it too much?“ and Taylor would just laugh at his nervousness but find it very cute that he cares so much about what her parents think.

2. Taylor always wearing glasses around the house and him telling her everytime how sexy her PJ and glasses attire is to him

3. Taylor excitedly pointing to the window and saying “Horses” whenever they pass a herd of Horses while driving through the English countryside.

4. Joe always looking at her food with a touch of disappointment on his face and murmuring “should’ve gotten what you got, love” every single time they order Chinese food, which is slowly driving her insane.

5. Taylor making Joe watch “The Sense of an Ending” for the eleventh time because she’s so proud of his accomplishments and wants him to be ’proud of his craft’ which he always comments with rolling eyes but a smile on his face.

6. Taylor giggling hysterically whenever Joe is seen on screen and holding his hand throughout the entire movie while squeezing it whenever his charm or acting skills are impressing her a bit more.

7. Joe always agreeing to watch his movies with her because her excited giggles and proud smiles are what gets him through every rough day even after a failed audition.

8. Joe always kissing her fingertips whenever they sit in the car and she complains about her cold hands.

9. Joe pressing his nose into her hair while mumbling a loud “no no no no no” after the alarm goes off in the morning.

10. Joe laughing and saying “s’ fine. Mummy’s just having a lot of fun” when Olivia starts meowing because she got scared by Taylor’s moans coming from the bedroom. Taylor would just start laughing from underneath him in bed, slowly coming down from a mind-blowing orgasm and mumbling “we have to shut the door next time, baby.“

11. Joe sometimes stepping up right behind her to place his hands on her back while she’s rinsing off the dishes and Taylor mumbling a quiet “Yeah go on, I could use a massage, baby.” which is always quickly followed by “No, Joe. Not on my boobs.” and his mischievous laugh in her neck.

12. Taylor always sending him random selfies, wether she’s grumpy and on the plane or just woke up on the other side of the globe because he told her once how his day always lightens up when he looks at his phone and sees her face.

13. Joe becoming really shy and not able to react cool anymore whenever she’s bragging about how he’s the “most amazing guy in the world“ in front of her entire family on a holiday.

14. Taylor standing in front of the patio door of her Rhode Island home, trying to get Olivia inside before it starts to rain even harder. „Olivia. C’mon. It’s raining!“ She’d yell, has no clue how to get the stubborn cat inside. Joe would walk up to her and slowly open the door a bit more to step outside “m’ getting her. One wet pussy in this household is enough.“ he’d say with a mischievous smirk on his face before getting hit by his girlfriend, who can’t believe how cocky he is at times: "You did not just say that, Joseph.”

15. Joe sometimes whispering a low „you’re the love of my life, do you know that..“ while laying awake in the middle of the night, holding her in his arms and listening to her soft snores and starring at her for minutes.

16. Joe and Taylor watching BBC documentaries until the middle of the night and having deep conversations and discussions about it afterwards.

17. Joe sometimes smiling at her in the middle of a serious discussion about a certain topic that was part of the documentary and answering with a quiet “god, you’re so smart. you have no idea how sexy that is.”

18. Taylor constantly burning her fingers while cooking and Joe always yelling a concerned “be more careful, baby. please.“ from upstairs.

19. Taylor’s heart melting when she enters the living room after preparing some food for her godson and finding Joe and him cuddling together on the couch and reading a book together.

20. Taylor always wearing his clothes in the house when he’s gone a for a few days for work. Even though his sweatpants are way to big for her, she’d always find a way to make’m fit while having a chilled day at home with the cats.

21. Joe calling Tay “the master of cheese“ because she always adds an extra layer of cheese on her pizza whenever they’re at home.

22. Tay and Joe watching “The Voice Kids UK“ on TV and Joe mumbling an impressed “we should really produce kids, baby.“ after hearing all these talented children sing which causes Taylor to giggle quietly, cuddle closer to him and daydream about the future.

23. Tay and Joe having these little inside jokes that are literally annoying everyone around them. Wether it’s on a night out with friends or at her parents house for dinner: One look is always enough to make the two burst out in laughter without anyone else getting the joke.

24. Taylor always bending up to him, pressing her face in his neck and kissing his warm skin softly before giving him a long hug.

25. Joe having a light obsession with her hair. He’d play with her ponytail whenever she’s sitting next to him, take every opportunity he can to run his big hands through her hair or kiss her head over her bangs because she just smells too good for him to stay away.

26. Joe and Tay both having these random habits that are a result of spending too much time together. For example, her starting to pick at Joe’s plate in the restaurant and putting some of his food on her plate as soon as the meal has arrived and everyone of her friends and family looking at her with a questioning look while she’d just casually answer with "he doesn’t eat eggplant.“ and Joe thankfully starting to eat his food afterwards.

27. Joe saying random phrases at times, like: „Der kaffee schmeckt koestlich. German. For ‚the coffee is delicious“ while packing his suitcase and her always repeating every single one of his remarks.

28. Joe feeling Tay get a bit jealous deep down inside whenever he talks about a romantic scene he was shooting on set and Taylor acting as if she couldn’t care less.

29. Joe and Tay being not just lovers but best friends. So much, that he even feels comfortable to ask her questions about the female body he always had because growing up with two brothers did not help him to develop a basic knowledge about the female emotions. He’d ask things like “Does it feel weird to have a tampon inside you?“ or "Is it annoying to have to wear a bra in public all the time?” which always makes Taylor laugh.

30. Joe always taking notes in his head about the moves and actions that bring her the most pleasure while making love. Like, every change of position, every pressure on his fingers, every kiss behind her ear that would bring her closer to climax would be saved in the back of his head. And over time, he knows exactly what buttons to push to make her come undone in his hands after only a few minutes.

31. Joe loving to wash her hair whenever they take a shower together

32. Taylor treating him like a baby whenever he’s sick. She’d cook him soup and tea, check on him every ten minutes, put on his favorite movies and mumble a casual “my poor baby.“ while Joe has cuddled his head into her neck and her stroking his scalp while laying in bed with him.

33. Joe convincing her how freeing it feels to sleep naked with nothing on but some underpants and her discovering that feeling of freedom in her bedroom of not having to put on some pyjamas to sleep but instead sleep skin on skin right next to him.

34. Joe feeling depressed all day long whenever he had the pleasure to fall asleep with her in his arms and having to wake up alone because she had to catch an early flight.

35. Joe trying to hide it, but finding it extremely cute whenever she couldn’t sleep at night and wakes up with puffy eyes and little curls all over her head.

36. Taylor always admiring how intelligent and well educated he is whenever he starts to explain her something about the economical outcomes of England becoming independent again and leaving the EU.

37. Taylor being dead serious while telling her mom that her future grandkids are destined to be blonde weirdos with huge foreheads and an indefinable accent.

38. Joe always providing her with her whip cream and chocolate when she’s on her period which leads to Tay mumbling an agitated “thanks for supporting my disgusting eating habits.“ while having her mouth full of whip cream and laying in front of the TV like a pregnant woman.

39. Taylor being super moody somedays and picking stupid fights over every stupid little thing.

40. Joe always being the one to end an argument even though he’s just as stubborn as her, but he simply cannot take a few hours of being in the same house as her and not loving up on her in any way.

41. Taylor discussing with him if “Taylor Alwyn” sounds good or not and Joe confessing to her that he sometimes dreams about introducing her as “Mrs. Alwyn” to strangers.

42. Joe receiving some messages from his family and friends on her birthday saying “Happy Birthday to your girlfriend” and he replied to every single one of them with “What girlfriend?”

43. Taylor fixing his hair almost every morning because the longer it gets, the more he complains.

44. Taylor playing him all the songs she wrote for him on piano while he just sits next to her, listening to her for hours.

45. Joe surprising her on set while Tay is shooting a music video and bringing Andrea and her their favorite Starbucks drinks which gives him extra mother-in-law points.

46. Joe chatting with Andrea while Tay is shooting some scenes and him constantly gushing about how amazing she looks, how nervous she has been all morning and what a talented actress she’d be while Andrea just looks at him in awe, thinking about how in love this guy must be with her daughter.

47. Taylor imitating his accent at times and saying “Baby, would you like some more wootaah?” and him just overhearing it because she starts doing it all the time that he basically got used to it.

48. Joe casually pinching her bum whenever she walks by just to hear her squeak.

49. Joe eating the most sugary and unhealthy chocolate peanut butter cereal for breakfast every morning and Taylor watching him while wondering how he can still be in such a good physical condition without suffering from diabetes or obesity.

50. Joe hating to wake her up in the morning when she’s sick but has to catch a flight to work on some very important and album related things. He’d carefully crawl into bed to her once again and kiss her face at least ten times before whispering a soft “it’s time, baby.” in her ear, pulling her inside his warm arms after hearing her complain already and mumbling “I know, baby. I know. I love you so much.” in her hair to make waking up for her while being super sick just a little better.

[mor-beck-more-problems]

Resolution || Solo

For her birthday, Morgan Beck decided it was safe enough to visit Al’s Diner alone. It was eight, an auspicious time only because it after the elderly dinner rush but before students with free Friday’s would come stumbling in to eat away their benders. 

Morgan smudged the snow into her pea coat before walking in. It was a Goodwill find with cat hair from its last life stuck to the wool, but it was still designer, and Morgan prickled in her cheeks to be seen wearing it in town, lest it draw someone’s attention and send rogue ripples into the universe she wouldn’t be able to call back. She couldn’t stomach embracing full-on-frump; her mother had raised her right, except for all the lying, and she worked hard enough at being pretty not to cover it up. No, Morgan wanted to look nice. Just not...too nice. Not ‘hey universe, you almost forgot about me but here I am getting cocky and cozy’ nice. 

The bell over the door jingled as she came in, dulled and muffled with neglect. A tarnish-splotched mirror showed her reflection, warped with self-consciousness and perhaps too big a smile for the venue. Morgan only let herself look at it for a moment; doing anything else would only make her sad.

“Hi Nikha!”

Nikha grabbed a menu without looking up from her notepad. “Sit anywhere you like. Want your tea?”

Morgan hadn’t thought out her evening this far. This time of year, it took her an hour just to decide whether to leave her apartment. She stopped and considered the risks: it was a Thursday, just before the full moon. Thursdays were a little charged with expectation, this close to the weekend, but the waxing period was the time for pulling energy to oneself; going a little fancy would be like swimming out to sea in a crowd. Granted, it was a special Thursday for her, but...

“I didn’t think it was going to be a hard question,” Nikha said.

Morgan gave her brightest apology smile. It was old hat by now, easier than making explanations. “About that. Actually, I would like a hot cocoa, please. With whipped cream.”

“O-kay.” She eyed Morgan, who was holding her smile for good measure, like she might drop her face and shout boo! But the moment passed and Nikha backed towards the kitchen. “Coming right up.”

Morgan ordered a cheeseburger, fat and cooked medium, with hashbrowns instead of fries. 

Having a birthday so close to Christmas meant most Morgan’s parties were attended only by her parents and Mrs. Campell from her mom’s work. After the flood forced them into a new neighborhood, her mom made her a new offer. “I’ll make you anything you want for dinner, as long as it’s something out of the ordinary,” she said. This seemed like an unfair challenge for Morgan, who liked rules as long as they were fair, even the rules of dinner. She asked for burgers and hashbrowns, and stacked the crisp potatoes into her bun when her mother looked underwhelmed with her show of creativity. The next year, Morgan asked for waffles with all the toppings on at once. Another, she had chicken and vegetables doused in maple syrup, though this didn’t quite live up to her imagination. Around fourteen, when Morgan started wrangling oddball friends over for the occasion, she and her mother hatched multi courses together: green beans and bacon, eggplant parm, butter biscuits and chocolate gravy for dipping. If nothing else, it made her known around school for something besides dressing up too much, and this made Morgan sparkle with pride while it lasted. But for herself alone, nothing ever matched this: breakfast and dinner tucked together under a bun. 

“Any desert tonight?” Nikha asked. 

“Yes, please,” Morgan said. “What’s your favorite?”

Nikha rattled off the specials and made a half hearted defense for the chocolate sundae, although they were out of maraschino cherries. 

“What would you want someone to order you for your birthday?” Morgan asked. 

“Easy. That whole damn chocolate cake,” Nikha said, and gestured over her shoulder to a four tier cake iced in crooked swirls and topped with a plastic bow. It took Morgan back to the year she asked for an everything cake, with four cake flavors and three different fillings, all hidden behind ordinary chocolate. Her mom had urged her to do better, and not for the first time Morgan wanted to scream that if it wasn’t good enough for her, she should just decide for herself, and what was so wrong with wanting a cake that was still just a cake anyway? What was so wrong with wanting something nice and normal? 

Morgan’s mother hadn’t told her then. She’d made her the cake and given her an apology by way of a one-armed hug. But Morgan wished she could reach back into their sad, too-small kitchen and shake her. Ask her, was this your stupid way of trying to prepare me? Was this really worth all your energy and power when you could have been fixing our family?

Still, it had been a really nice cake.

“I like the way you think, Nikha,” Morgan said. “I’ll settle for just one slice.”

When the cake appeared on the table, Morgan urged her to have a bite, just one, as a birthday favor, and after enough urging Nikha agreed with a sheepish smile. They looked at each other, and it was almost like bonding.

Morgan paid her bill, tipped well, and watched Nikha’s retreat to the kitchen through the mirror panels. When the coast was clear she took out her candles: black for protection, white for summoning, and purple for remembrance.

She propped them around her in a circle and lit the wicks quickly. The purple one, she squished into the heavy center of her cake. She said her words of cleansing. Her words of blessing. She said the words of gratitude, though her teeth ached to speak them. And at last, she said what she had come to say.

“The bullshit stops here. Not one more year, not one more daughter, not one more fuck-up will I permit from your shadows. I call those responsible to me on my thirty-ninth year. Answer my call.” She reached for the fork, the one Nikha had used, and jabbed it into her dry, peeling cuticles. The blood came quick, and Morgan felt a rush as it connected with the residue of Nikha’s energy, and powered something bigger than she had ever laid her fingers on at her parents’ knee. “Answer my call, by the promises you made and the promises you broke, by the blood we share--” At the edge of Morgan’s attention, Nikha’s body collapsed on the kitchen floor. She’d be fine; it wasn’t like a little saliva and intention could kill a person, at least not that Morgan had been able to guess from her scant reading. But Morgan’s real focus remained on her birthday cake, which had begun to tremble on its plate. Moran raised the fork and flipped through the whole stack of disasters that had followed her here, the secrets that had screwed her over, the pain her family had carried for no good reason, one after the other, she imagined them skewered on the crooked prongs. She stabbed it through the cake flesh, done, and said through her teeth, “So may it be.” 

The cake went still. A drip of wax fell on the icing, and Morgan felt the crackle of energy flutter away. Had she done it? Did she just have to...wait? Or was this one more failure to add to the stack? Somehow, it seemed just about right to Morgan that she couldn’t tell one way or the other. She slumped in her book and picked the candle out, slid the waxy pieces of cake to the corner of her plate, and nibbled at what was left with a clean fork. “Happy thirty-nine, me,” she sighed. “Here’s to not losing everything this year. And to finishing the job.” Morgan swirled a piece into her mouth and let it melt on her tongue. The snow tumbled harder around White Crest and as the buttercream took the edge off Morgan’s disappointment, she found the old bounce in her step and left the diner smiling.

[cwnerd12]

4. In Celebration of Queen Mother Harriett Fairweather of Samaria

Jack opens the front door, and Monique bursts in, “Where is my new little nephew?!” Jack greets her with a hug, “He’s with everyone else.” The go into the living room where Abby holding Daniel, along with Michelle, Shay, Joel, Asher, Betty, and their baby daughter Pearl. Everyone greets her, “Hey, Monique!” Monique makes a beeline for Daniel, “Oh my god, he is too damn cute!” David sticks his head from out of the kitchen, “Hey, Monique! Dinner's almost ready!" Monique, “What we havin’?” David, “Eggplant biryani.” Monique, “Ooooh, Indian.” She goes over and fusses over Pearl, “Hey, Pearlie Girl.” Betty laughs, “Hey, Auntie Monique.” Monique turns and sits down on the sofa, "You know, DeMarcus and I are thinking about adopting." Michelle, “Are you, really?" Monique, “We're just thinking about it. Nothing official yet.”

Cut to: Everyone sits around the dinner table, digging into the food that David has made. Monique, “Next week we're back on official Royal Duty. Going to Samaria for Queen Mother Harriet’s 90th birthday gala.” David, “Yeah, I can handle that.” Monique, “Can you?” Abby, “I’ll be there to keep him on a tight leash, as always. And besides, all anyone’s going to want to talk about is the new baby prince.” Monique, “Mercy and Grace also got invited.” Jack, “Seriously?” Michelle, “Grace has always been friends with Iris and Tabitha. It’s been a big part of Samaria keeping the peace with Ammon.” Monique, “And Mercy is technically a princess, so she got invited.” David, “It’s a celebration, everyone likes Harriett, I’m not going to be rude and cause trouble.” Asher, “So what are we going to do when that’s over?” David, “I want to look into some way to prevent future coup attempts, not just in Moab, but here, and in the other countries.” Joel, “Stopping coups in Ammon means we’re stuck with Wayne.” David, “We’re stuck with him anyway. Anyway, it’s just theoretical. Something to think about.” Monique, “I’ve been talking with this friend of mine, she’s a director… she wants to do a documentary about the AFG.” David makes a face, “They’ve already written a book.” Monique, “She wants to do more than just a movie. She’s thinking a TV special. Six or seven parts. She’s got channels making her offers. Honestly, David, someone���s going to make this documentary, and it might as well be my girl. She’s damn good at what she does.” David still makes a face. Jack speaks up, “Sounds good. David's gonna be David.” Jack grins at him, “Fussy,” he adopts a husky, dramatic voice, “I don't want to talk about it.” Monique, “I told her getting David to talk would be difficult.” David, “Come on, I know you all have stuff you don’t like to talk about.” Asher, “Is this going to be shown in other countries?” Monique, “Definitely not in Ammon, but I know there’s a market for it. We’re very popular on the international scene.” David, “It's not a bad idea, I just- I need to get used to the idea is all. Prepare myself for it.” Monique, “It’ll be after the gala, anyway. You got plenty of time to think about it.”

Across town, Frieda sits having dinner with Andrew and Chloe, “Of course I was horrified to learn that she was doing diplomacy in the delivery room. I'm hoping that in talking to you, I can help convince Abigail to act like a mother. That is off the record, of course." Across from her, Andrew sits with a huge, toothy, unctuous smile plastered across his face. He is not only back on his bullshit, he never left his bullshit to begin with, “When did you last speak with her?" Frieda, “Shortly after my grandson was born. I’m sure she only agreed to it because Frankie insisted.” Andrew, “And what did she say to you?” Frieda, “Only the polite things. We didn’t speak for very long.” The smile on Andrew’s face tightens, “Is… is that all?” Frieda, “What do you mean, is that all?” Andrew, “While I understand your desire to share the truth with the world-” Frieda, “I need money. The widow’s compensation I receive isn’t enough to meet my current needs.” Andrew, “You must understand, OMGossip does sell a certain product, as it were.” Frieda, “I have private pictures of Prince Daniel. It’s nothing truly revealing or alarming, but it’s enough that I know the king will come to realize that my financial situation needs improving. Are you really telling me you’ll say no to these pictures? There’s plenty of other places I could sell them to.” Andrew keeps the smile on his face, even as anger flashes in his eyes, “We will happily give you the price you’re asking for.” Frieda smiles, “You aren't out of luck. King David may offer to amend my finances, but if you can do a better job… I do have some choice thing to say about... I don't even know what to call him. He's not my son-in-law.” Chloe, “Your grandbabydaddy.” Frieda, curtly, "I've never been fond of him. But you may not quote me on that. Not yet."

Later, Andrew bitches to Chloe, “Ooooh so she doesn't like David. How scandalous, what an outrage!” Chloe, “You can still make hash out of it.” Andrew, “I swear, this business used to be fun! Things are so boring now that David is all happily married and not taking any captives.” Chloe, “Have you thought at all about making a change?” Andrew, “What kind of change?" Chloe, "I dunno, any kind of change.” Andrew, "What am I supposed to do, go back into the weapons business?” Chloe, “I mean, you could.” Andrew pouts, “Maybe I should. I’ve always wanted to be an important man, and peddling royal baby pictures isn’t that.”

David talks with Mercy and Grace, a sign language translator for Grace. David, "You don't have to go.” Mercy, “I don't understand, why was I invited?” David, "Queen Harriett has always been involved in helping orphans and refugees from Carmel, and she’s been very impressed with the advocacy work you’ve done. She really wants to meet you.” Mercy nods, “Okay. Sounds fun.” David, “Really, you don’t have to go, it’s it’s going to be upsetting…” Mercy, “No, I mean it. It sounds fun. A lot better than a funeral.” David, “I will personally make sure Wayne stays away from you.” Grace sits with her brow deeply furrowed, “I want to see my family, but I’m afraid going will be a bad idea.” David, “I can give you a full security detail. Have people monitoring your food, even.” Grace, "I don't even know what I'd wear. I didn't bring any jewels. I don't have much money." David, "Rose can lend you something." Mercy signs to Grace, "You should think of the diplomatic advantages we could take. It could be a sign to the public there's no ill will in your family. Galas like this can bring in a lot of supporters for any charity you’re endorsing. And, if you show up looking pretty enough, you can make yourself very popular. Tell a story with your dress." David, "It's up to you.”

Grace sits anxiously at a computer in the living room of the modest home she shares with Gus. On the screen appears Queen Mae and Princesses Bonnie, Mackynzie, and Rosaleigh. Grace gives a pained smile and signs hello. Mae signs and speaks, “I thought you would never call us.” Grace replies, “I thought it was unwanted.” Bonnie and Rosaleigh glance quickly at Mackynzie. Mae, “Why are you calling us now?” Grace, “I was invited to Queen Harriett’s 90th birthday gala. Apparently, the Fairweathers believe we are still on good terms.” Mae, without raising her voice, “And they’re going to continue to believe this. You’re going, aren’t you?” Grace nods submissively. Bonnie smiles nervously, “I’m so happy you’ll be joining us.” Mackynzie mutters, “She’s not joining us, she’ll be with the Gilboans.” Mae, “I’m still very glad you’re going. It’s of utmost importance that we appear as a family, united under your brother, the king.” Grace, “Gus is going to be there with me.” Bonnie smiles brightly while Mae and Mackynzie smile politely. Bonnie, “We’ll all be very happy to see Gus!” Grace, “Wayne is going to have to be polite to him.” Mae, “Of course. I certainly hope you’re going to maintain your standard of modesty and show the world that Gilboa hasn’t corrupted you.” Grace, “Yes, yes. I want Wayne to stay away from Gus. David is giving us extra security to make sure nothing happens.” Mae, “Don’t disrespect your brother like that! With your father gone, he is the man who is in charge go this family!” Grace, “Gus is my husband. I am a part of my husband’s family.” Mae grimaces and clasps her hands, “Let us pray!” Bonnie and Mackynzie clasp their hands and bow their heads. Grace simply clasps her hands and watches Mae. Mae, “Lord, we ask for your guidance through these difficult times….” Grace squints to see Mae’s lips, but the screen is too small.

In the palace dressing room, Mercy and Grace look at fancy ball gowns, giggling and grinning like little girls. Mercy twirls around, holding a dress up to her. Grace signs, "I always wanted to do this with you as a little girl, I'm so glad I can, now." A group of guards pushing a cart stacked with jewelry boxes enter the room. An aide says, “The jewels, your highness.” Grace, "Ah, thank you,” She turns to Grace and Mercy, “You girls are free to borrow from my jewelry collection.” She goes over and opens a box with a tiara in it. She smiles and turns to the girls, “Mercy, dear I have something for you." She holds up the box, containing a sunburst tiara with a large yellow diamond in the center, the one worn by Esperanza Abbadon in her only official royal portrait. Mercy gasps when she sees it, and tears fill her eyes, "The Sunburst!” she steps forward and takes it out of the box, “I thought it was destroyed!" Rose, “No, I wouldn't let a piece of history be destroyed or sold off. I actually have quite a bit of your mother's jewelry in the vault. I want to give it to you." Tears fall down Mercy's face, “My mother… she looked so beautiful when she wore this. Thank you, Rose. Thank you so much.” Rose, “The things you wear tell a very important story about you. You have to be very careful to tell the kind of story you want to tell.” Grace’s translator translates this into sign. Grace looks down at the modest dress she’s holding, and then places it back on the dress rack.

David sits in the limousine with Jack, Abby, Michelle, and Rose, all dressed up for the gala. David, Jack, Abby and Michelle all look at David’s phone. David smiles brightly, “Hi, Daniel! We miss you!” On his phone Jessie holds Daniel in her arms while Daniel puts his fist in his mouth. Already, he has a thick tuft of blonde hair. Abby, “How is he?” Jessie, “Oh, he's fine. Just thinks he’s spending the night with Grandma.” Daniel coos and grasps at the phone, causing everyone to laugh. Michelle, “We’re gonna be showing pictures off all night.” David, “We’ll try to leave as soon as we can in the morning. Im trying to make it through this with as little drama s possible.” Jessie, cheerfully, “Okay. I’m gonna give Daniel another bottle in a little bit and then I’m gonna put him down for the night.” Abby’s hone dings, and she gets it out of her purse. David, “Okay. We'll see you tomorrow. Good night.” Jack and Michelle both say goodnight, and David ends the conversation. He looks at Abby, “What’s up?” Abby, “Frankie's coming.” Jack, “What? How?” Abby, “Quentin pulled a few strings.” David, “Huh. Good for him, I guess.” Abby puts her phone away, “Benefits of being a prince's best friend."

Guests arrive at the Palace of Samaria. Chloe and Andrew walk arm in arm. Chloe wears a kicky retro look, she beams and looks around, “Oh my god, this is so much fun! How’d you get such a last-minute invite?” Andrew, smirking, "The OMGossip archives have some photographs of Prince Luke that Queen Harriet hopes never see the light of day.” Chloe, “Oooh, you’re so smart." Royals start arriving. The Judds arrive. Hattie wears an enormous, fluffy hot pink dress and an obnoxiously large tiara, while the other women wear subdued modest gowns. Immediately upon going inside, they’re greeted by Andrew, “Ah, Your Majesty! I was hoping to run into you tonight! My name is Andrew Cross, I’m the owner of OMGossip.” Chloe says to Hattie, “Oh my god, I love your dress!” Hattie, “Bless your heart! Thank you so much! You look beautiful, too!” Wayne, “Pleased to meet you, Mr. Cross. I’m quite familiar with your publication.” Andrew, “I’ve heard how you’re trying to expand the Ammonian weapons industry. I have a few ideas that I think might be of interest to you.” Wayne begins to reply, when he's interrupted by a man in his mid-30s, "There you are! You can't ignore me, now! I want my family’s property returned!” Wayne signals to his security guys, and they pull the man away. protesting. Wayne, "My apologies. Zachary White still insists that he's the rightful heir to the throne of Ammon, and he won't shut up about it.” Andrew, “Pathetic.” Back outside, The Gilboan limo rolls up, and David gets out. He waves at the photographers, and then helps Jack get out. Inside the palace, Frankie greets everyone with hugs. David, “Hey, Frankie, how you doin?” Frankie, “I’m doing fuckin’ great, man. Tonight’s a big night. Have you seen Quentin at all?” David, “Uh, yeah, I think he's right over there…” HE points around and spots Quentin, who sees them both and comes over. Quentin ignores David and greets Frankie with a big hug, "You ready for tonight?” Frankie, "Of course, man.” Quentin’s Fiancée, Miranda, comes up behind them. Her radiant smile and glittering pink and gold dress make her look like a warm sunrise, “David! Congratulations on your new son! The pictures are so cute!" David, slightly confused, "Uh, thanks.” Back outside, Gus gets out of a limo, and then helps Mercy and Grace get out. Mercy wears a slightly sexy strapless dress. It’s far from slutty, but it goes against Ammonian modesty standards. Gus signs to her, "You looks so beautiful.” Mercy wears the sunbeam tiara and a flow yellow lace dress. They both look absolutely stunning, and cameras flash madly at them. David greets Laura with a hug, “You don’t know how glad I am that you’re here.” Laura, “Trust me, I’m very happy to be here. How is Daniel?” David, “Absolutely wonderful.” Laura spots Andrew over his shoulder, still talking to Wayne and Hattie. Laura cautiously says, "Don't turn around, but Andrew Cross is behind you." David, “Aw, Jesus, is he?” Laura, "Looks like he's talking to Wayne.” David shakes his head, “Doesn’t matter. I’m determined to have a good time tonight. He can go skulk in the shadows like he always does. If he tried to get near me or Jack, my security will deal with it.” Laura, “I’m surprised you didn't have him arrested after the allegations about Gath came out.” David, “Michael fucked up the investigation. We didn’t find anything conclusive.” The aide from before comes over and greets them, “Your majesties, the picture.” Back with Andrew and Wayne, Andrew goes on, "You see, my family was in the weapons business for nearly four hundred years, and I was the beneficiary of all this accumulated knowledge, until my scheming cousin stole it out from under me..." Grace, Gus, and Mercy enter the palace, and a wave of camera flashes hits them. With the Judd women, Bonnie and Mackynzie see her dress, and Mackynzie says to Bonnie, “She’s turning Gilboan." Wayne stares helplessly at Mercy as Andrew prattles on, “I believe with my expertise, I could help grow the Ammonian weapons industry…” Mercy laughs and chats with some other princesses, when suddenly, Zachary White comes up to her, “That tiara is a family heirloom!” Mercy, taken aback, "I beg your pardon?” Andrew talks to Wayne, “I assure you, I can completely revolutionize your weapons output…” Without saying anything, Wayne hurries off toward Zachary and Mercy. Zachary, "My grandmother wore that tiara!" Mercy, "Oh, you're the White heir, aren't you?” Wayne comes over and pushes him out of the way, "Leave her alone!” With David, Laura says, “Oh, shit.” David turns around and sees the escalating situation, “Fuck.” He approaches Mercy, “What’s going on?” Zachary, "That tiara belongs to my  family!" David, "It's a gift to Miss Abbadon from Queen Rose. It belongs to no one but her.” Wayne glares and starts to say something, but an aide approaches, "Your majesties, the picture.”

In a room set up with a camera and lighting equipment, the monarchs all pose behind Queen Harriett, who sits in a chair. Rose, Gloria, and Mae are also with them. Rose awkwardly stands next to Hattie with her big poofy skirt. Rose grimaces and tries to move the layers of tulle out of the way, “If you don't mind, dear.” Hattie gives her a huge, beaming smile, “I would just love to speak with you later. Really, I’ve tried so hard to model myself on you- the beautiful queen and the woman behind a great man. I admire your sense of style so much.” Rose gives her a simpering smile, “Then let me give you some fashion advice: this dress is the kind that is best worn with a plastic tiara.” She turns and smiles at the camera. Hattie realizes she's been insulted, and looks at Wayne to defend her. He's preoccupied with his thoughts. Without saying anything, Hattie tries to force a smile as the photographer says, “Smile!” Posed along the elegant and refined queens, she looks tacky and out of place.

In the ballroom, guests mingle. Andrew and Chloe sit at a table with Zachary White. Zachary, “The sunburst tiara was a wedding gift to my great-grandmother, Queen Gladys. It was my grandmother's favorite. I have many fond memories of her wearing it. When Judd and Abbadon took power, they took everything from my family, even our most precious heirlooms. We were left with nothing.” Suddenly, Chloe's face lights up with recognition, “Oooooh! I know who you are! Your granddad was the dude who sent soldiers to central America so they could protect drug traffickers and sell all their cocaine in North America!” Zachary scowls, “King Allen, yes. He and my father were both brutally murdered by Judd and Abbadon when I was a child.” Andrew, "You have all my sympathy. King Silas drove my father from Gilboa.” Chloe, "Yeah, but Alek Amal was the one who murdered your dad, remember?" Andrew, “That was never confirmed.” Chloe, “But Amal said he did. He made that recording. I am Alek Amal and I ended William Cross’s pathetic and worthless life.” Andrew ignores her, "My cousin stole our family's company out from under me. I know very well what it's like to have everything taken from you." At the entrance of the ballroom, a herald announces, “Announcing her Royal Highness, Queen Mother Harriett Fairweather of Samaria.” The doors swing open, and King John escorts his mother into the ballroom. The guests all stand and applaud as Harriet waves. Behind them, the other monarchs all enter. David sees Andrew glaring at him. He says to Jack, “I’m gonna keep Andrew away from you tonight, don’t worry.” Jack, “Don’t punch him.” David grins, “But what if he deserves it?” They both laugh. An aide approaches them, “Your majesty, Queen Harriett has requested you for the first dance of the evening.” David, “What, seriously?” Behind the aide, Harriett smiles at him, “I’m ninety years old, and all I want is to dance with a handsome man!” David sputters, “I, um i-if my husband is all right with it.” He looks at Jack. Jack cackles, “Go for it, babe!” David, “Okay.” He goes over to Harriett, who holds her hand out. David takes it, and leads her to the dance floor. Harriet, “Do you know the foxtrot?” David, “Yes, I do, actually.” They get into position. The music begins, and they dance. From the sidelines, Wayne watches in disgust, “Good God, King Harold is in his grave, getting cucked!” David hears none of it. He smiles brilliantly and twirls Harriett around while cameras flash wildly. Harriett, “You are a wonderful dancer!” David, “As are you!” The music ends. David bows, and Harriett curtsies. Everyone applauds wildly. Harriett laughs, “Thank you, David, for giving an old woman exactly what she wants!” David, “You are most welcome!” He goes back to Jack, and greets him with an apologetic kiss. Other couples dance on the dance floor. Grace and Gus capture the attention of photographers, a ridiculously attractive couple. Harriett dances with John, and David dances with Jack. Quentin dances with Miranda, “Look Miranda, I um… I have something very important I need to tell you later this evening. I don’t want to cause a big scene, but I need to talk to you and my family later in one of the private rooms.” Miranda, eyes growing huge, “Really?” Quentin, “Yeah, just keep it quiet.” Miranda, “I thought this night would never come!” Wayne dances with Hattie, keeping a sharp eye on Mercy. Mercy sits at a table by herself, looking beautiful but alone. A handsome young man with a Samarian accent approaches her, “Pardon me, Miss Abbadon?” Mercy looks at the young man, “Yes?” Young man, “I’m Prince Luke of Samaria, and I’m a big admirer of the charitable work you do.” Mercy smiles graciously, “Oh, thank you very much.” Luke, “I was wondering, might I share this dance with you?” He holds his hand out. Mercy beams, “Yes, a dance would be wonderful.” Luke leads Mercy out to the dance floor, and they begin to dance. Wayne sees it, and fury flashes across his face, “That degenerate is trying to dance with Mercy!” Hattie, “Wayne, you are dancing with me! Forget about Mercy!” Off on the sidelines, Miranda gushes to Princess Carrie of Aram, “Oh my God, Carrie, I think Quentin is finally going to propose to me!” Carrie gasps, “Oh my god, congratulations!” She hugs Miranda tightly. Miranda struggles not to cry, “I was so jealous of you at your wedding, watching you become a princess!” she sniffs, “I’m finally gonna be a princess, too!” Luke twirls Mercy around, and Mercy laughs, having a great time. Wayne dances with Hattie, but he can’t stop looking over at Mercy. Mercy laughs at a joke Luke tells and puts her head on his shoulder. Wayne seethes. The evening goes on. Back at their table, David shoes Princesses Iris and Tabitha pictures of Daniel. Iris, “He is so cute!" Miranda comes up to them, “Oh, is that Prince Daniel?" David, proudly, “Yes.” Miranda, “Oh, I've always wanted to be a mommy. Quentin is going to make a very big announcement in one of the receiving rooms, I’d like for you all to be there!" David, “Oh, okay. I guess we'll go there, then."

Frankie leads Abby and Michelle down a hallway to the room where everyone is supposed to meet. Abby, "So how big of an announcement is this?" Frankie, “Huge. Life-changing.” Michelle, jokingly, "What, is he coming out?” Frankie doesn't reply. Abby and Michelle exchange nervous glances. Frankie opens the door of the receiving room, and then says, "Oh, shit." All of the royal families are packed into the room. Quentin nervously talks to Miranda, "I told you just to gather my family. I didn't want this to be a big deal.” Miranda, "But this is a big deal!" Lawrence, grumpily, "What big announcement are you trying to make, Quentin? Get it over with!” Where they're seated, Grace’s interpreter signs. Quentin glances over at Frankie, who nods and shuts the door. Franke says to Abby and Michelle, "You two should sit down." They go and take seats beside David and Jack. Quentin takes a deep breath, “Okay, first of all, I would like to say that I am pansexual.” Grace's interpreter repeats this, but in sign. Lawrence, “What is that?" Quentin, "It means I'm attracted to women, men, and all non-binary gender identities." Jack, "Good for you, man!” Lawrence looks directly at David, "What's the difference between bi and pansexual?” David, "I, um, they- they're basically the same, it's just, um-” Quentin, “Pansexual is sexual attraction based more on an emotional and spiritual connection regardless of gender." David, “Yeah, that.” Quentin,  “Not only am I pansexual, I am in love with Frankie Hatch.” Frankie swells with pride and tears fill his eyes. Miranda, completely deflated, “What?" Quentin, “Miranda, I'm sorry, but I don't want to marry you, and everyone is just going to have to accept it!” Grace’s interpreter continues to sign. Grace’s jaw drops, and she looks from the interpreter to Quentin. Miranda’s chest begins to heave, "Oh my God…” Quentin, "I told you just to gather my family.”  Miranda, “Oh my God! You were supposed to propose to me!” Quentin, "I said I'm sorry.” Princess Celeste (Quentin’s mother) gets up and goes to comfort her. Lawrence, “Did David have anything to do with this?!" David, fully panicking, “What? Me?! No! I wouldn’t-” Quentin, "I met Frankie ad David's coronation ball, but I fell in love with him on my own! I didn't want to do this like this, but you guys kept putting so much pressure on m to marry Miranda, I had to do it in a way I couldn’t go back on!” Miranda wails, "Oh my god, my life is over!" Quentin, “You dated a prince. That still counts for something.” Lawrence stands up, “That is enough! You are no longer the heir to the throne of Edom!” Quentin, “You know what? That’s fine! I really didn’t want to be king, anyway. You can disown me all you want, but all that's gonna do is make you look like a homophobic old douche while I'm the heroic prince who gave up the throne for true love." He goes over to Frankie, and takes his hand, “And I do love you, Frankie.” Frankie, “I love you, too!” They share a passionate and beautiful kiss. Frankie, breathlessly, "Let's get out of here, man.” Quentin glances nervously over at his family, and then Miranda, and back at Frankie. He nods, “Yeah, let's get out of here." He takes Frankie's hand, and they both leave. The remaining royals all sit there in awkward silence. Harriett finally says something, "Well. Before we go back to the party, does anyone else feel the need to come out?" Awkwardly, Princess Denise of Aram says, “I made out with a girl in college, once. It was pretty nice." Jack bursts out laughing, and David has to laugh as well. Miranda, sheepishly, "It's not funny!" Jack, “Trust me, you're better off!" Other start to laugh and get up. In their corner, Prince Luke says to Mercy, “Would you care to join me outside? I’m not going to declare my undying love, but I would like to speak with you.” Mercy smiles, "That sounds nice." Mercy quickly goes over to David, "I'm going to speak with Prince Luke outside. So if you're wondering where I went, that's where I am." David, “Sure thing.” Wayne watches Mercy leave with Luke. Hattie says to him, "I'm not done dancing, yet. Come dance with me some more.”

In a hallway, Mercy and Luke are stopped by Zachary White, “That tiara belongs to me!" Luke, "Now isn't the time, Zach!” Mercy snaps, "You know what? Fine!” She takes the tiara off of her head, “Take it! It can go with all the other jewels your family smuggled out of Ammon!" Zachary takes the tiara. Mercy, “You still have all your family's wealth, and property, and connections, and for years I had nothing! Literally nothing to remind me of my mother! I wasn't even allowed to tell people about my her, even when she was slandered and disgraced as the wife of a madman! Finally, Queen Rose gave me something that she wore, something that I remember her wearing, and looking beautiful in, and being happy in, but of course, it belongs to you, and it'll go into your jewel vault, where it will sit and never be worn again!" Zachary awkwardly turns around and walks away, still holding the tiara. Luke tries to go after him, but Mercy stops him, “No, forget about it. I don't need a tiara. Take me outside."

Behind the palace is a rich garden, flooded with moonlight. Mercy and Luke walks arm-in arm. Mercy, “It's so beautiful.” Luke, "The gardens were first installed in 1871 by my great-great grandmother, Queen Eudosia.  After the defeat in the war with Edom, she felt that Samarians sorely needed something to be proud of again.” Mercy, “Then you must be really proud of all this.” Luke, “Oh, I am.” He sits down on a stone bench, "Please, come sit with me.” Mercy sits down beside him. Luke goes on, “You look absolutely beautiful tonight.” Mercy, "Thank you." Luke, “I must confess, when you first identified yourself in public, I was quite interested in you. I thought, there's someone whose story is similar to mine, who might understand me.” Mercy, “You’ll have to forgive me. For a long time, I kind of kept myself under a rock, as a survival mechanism of sorts. I- I know your parents died in a car crash, but I don't know the details of it.”  Luke, “My father was the black sheep of the Fairweather family, and my mother was the beautiful hellcat he married at far too young of an age. My father was drunk and high, driving a sports care at over a hundred miles an hour, screaming and fighting with my mother. I was in the back seat. The car crashed. They were killed, I survived. I was eight years old.” Mercy reaches over and puts her hand on his. Luke, “For a long time, I dealt with my grief by living like they did. I honestly expected to be dead before I turned twenty-one.” Mercy, softly, "Yeah, I know what that’s like.” Luke, “The rest of my family had written me off as a tragedy waiting to happen, but my grandmother refused to give up. She sent me to therapy, and helped me find a purpose in life. I came to realize, I’m uniquely situated as a prince. I've experienced loss and trauma, yes, but a lot of people have. I can help them. I'm being sincere when I say that I greatly admire the work you do.” Mercy, “I can't undo what my father did. But I try to make what's left better. It makes me feel better.” Luke, "I think that you and I can do some truly outstanding things together." Mercy smiles, flattered.

Inside, Wayne sits at a table with Andrew. Andrew goes on, "You see, CrossGen has long supported Ammon. There's a reason my father turned to your father when he was in need.” Wayne, “I’ll be frank with you, Ammon has plenty of weapons experts. There’s nothing new you can offer me there.” Andrew’s expression sours. Wayne, “What you can offer me is information about the happenings in the royal palace. I want to know if David is doing anything illicit with Mercy Abbadon.” Andrew, “I don’t know.” Wayne, “Lord knows he’s fucked half the women in Gilboa, and most of the men, too.” Andrew, “Actually, you’ll be very disappointed to learn that David is faithful to his husband.” Wayne, “Then you’re completely useless to me.” His eyes sweep the room. He spots Zachary holding the sunburst tiara, and rises sharply to his feet. Andrew, “Is something the matter, Your Majesty?” Wayne marches over to Zachary, “Where the hell did you get that?!" Zachary, “Miss Abbadon gave it to me.” Wayne, "You will give it right back to her!" Zachary, “I will not.” Wayne turns around and goes over to his team of big, burly security guys. They all nod, and then look at Zachary. A look of dread washes over his face as they all come over to him, grab him by the shoulders and lead him away.

In an empty hallway, Wayne holds the sunburst tiara in his hands, looking down at it imperiously as his security guys beat the crap out of Zachary. Wayne, “Good work, fellas.”

Back outside, David approaches Mercy and Luke, “Hey, Jack and I are going to go back to the hotel. Abby and Michelle want to stay a little longer, but Jack's feeling pretty tired." Mercy, "I was enjoying my conversation with Luke here. Do you mind if I stay a bit longer?” David, “No, that's fine.” Wayne and his security guys approach them. He has the tiara in his hand, "Mercy!" Mercy utters, “Shit. What do you want, Wayne?” Wayne holds the tiara out, “I got your tiara back." Mercy shakes her head, "I don't want it." Wayne, "What?" Mercy, "I don't want it if you have to give it to me." Wayne, "Don't say no to me, Mercy!” Mercy, “Wayne-” Wayne, "I still love you!" Mercy, “Wayne, please!” Luke steps in between Mercy and Wayne, "Don't cause a scene." Wayne, “Don't you dare touch me, you low-life! I won’t let you defile her!” He turns to Mercy, "Do you know who he is? What he's done, the kind of man he is?!" Luke, "I was just speaking with Abbadon quite frankly about my past behavior. There's no excuse for it, but I've done my best to become a better man.” Wayne, "I have loved Mercy since I was a child!" He steps over to her, and holds the tiara out, “Mercy, I want to marry you." Mercy, "What? You're already married!” Wayne, "The kings of the bible had multiple wives, and I can, too!” David waves for his security guys, and they move to pull Wayne away. Wayne drops the tiara, and pulls away out of their grip, “Keep your goddamn hands off of me!” His security guys shove David's security guys. Wayne yells at Mercy, “I loved you when I was a boy, and I still love you with all the fire in my soul!" Mercy turns to Luke, “I'm sorry, but I’m going to go with David.” Luke, “That’s quite alright.” Wayne rushes over and punches Luke, “How dare you speak to her!” David puts his arms around Mercy’s shoulders and tries to lead her away. His security guys try to restrain Wayne, who keeps screaming, “I love you Mercy! I will marry you! Where are you going? I will go to war with Gilboa! I swear I will!” David hurries Mercy away. Wayne keeps screaming, “Mercy! Mercy! Mercy!” (Music: “Miss Jackson” by Panic! at the Disco “Out the back door, goddamn…”)

[recentanimenews]

Hamefura – 09 – Anna Bakanina

Ever since bonking her head, Catarina has been possessed by the soul of a middle-class modern Japanese high school student, which means she’s a lot more likely to befriend her maid than the originally “programmed” Catarina. So it’s no surprise Catarina has befriended her maid, Anna.

Most of this episode is told from the perspective of Anna, who may not be a member of Catarina’s harem per se, but does owe her present life and happiness to Catarina’s kindness and strength.

This show is about more than Catarina unwittingly making all of her friends fall madly in love with her. It’s also about her intentionally trying to better the lives of others. When she successfully advances to the second year at magic academy, Catarina throws a pajama party for her girlfriends, and even suggests a boys-only party for the guys.

When talk turns to romance and the girls (taking a page from Catarina) ask Anna about her prospects for marriage, Catarina discretely deflects the question, saving Anna much awkwardness. It’s a gesture that indicates that while she’s too dense to sense the infatuation wafting off her friends, she’s not too dense to detect discomfort in her other friend, Anna, and has her back.

Anna needed someone’s back. The bastard daughter of a rich baron and his maid, when her mom died in a fire and her own arm was burned, the baron basically disowned her, as she no longer had any value as a marriage pawn. That’s when the distantly-related Claes family hired Anna as a maid, and she met Catarina.

Catarina was your typical willful spoiled haughty child of rich people, until she hit her head and…changed. Before she knew it, Catarina was inspiring Anna to start standing up for herself rather than acting so meek and submissive, and Lil’ Catarina has her back when it comes time to refuse her arranged marriage.

If it weren’t for Catarina being a good person and friend to Anna, there’s no telling what awful husband she would have ended up with. In any case, being apart from Catarina wasn’t a viable option for Anna, who had never even celebrated her birthday before she befriended Catarina.

To this day, she keeps Catarina’s little gifts in a wooden box she got from her the first time they celebrated. Anna’s story seemingly comes out of nowhere, but we knew Catarina was all about treating everyone equally regardless of their station in life, and despite it’s sudden inclusion in the story, I still admit to tearing up when Anna told her story. Now we know the first person to fall for her!

As Catarina and Alan had a romantic segment at the end of last week’s outing, it was looking like it would be Gerald’s turn at the end of this week’s, as he gets a fancy handwritten invitation from Catarina. With a sudden hop in his step, he devises the perfect gift for her: a new pair of gardening shears. He was listening, and he knows she’s not like other girls!

Alas, when Gerald arrives, he finds everyone else has not only been invited, but gave Catarina the same gift (they were all listening, and know she’s not like other girls)! She’s gathered them there not to confess her love, but because it’s her Harvest Day and she wants everyone to help out. To that end, she’s had matching olive-green gardening uniforms for everyone…which is an awesome sight to behold! The Cult of Catarina is officially militarized.

Yup, things couldn’t be going any better for Catarina, and it’s frankly been refreshing and heartwarming to see. Unfortunately, nothing ever lasts, and Catarina seems poised for some kind of reckoning, as an anti-Catarina group has been formed from those she stopped from bullying Maria.

They vow to “expose all of the evil deeds” she has committed, which confuses Catarina…as well as myself! What “evil deeds” could these be? Are these girls simply running on older otome code from back when Catarina was programmed to be the chief villainess? Regardless, there’s trouble in paradise…unless she can make this posse fall for her, of course…

Oh…my…GOD she’s in an eggplant costume…

By: magicalchurlsukui

[guyinlovewitheremika]

Eeek! I can't believe it's your birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! (you're officially 69 now ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) I'm very aware of the fact that I already wished you happy birthday but as your daughter I must be extraTM, so I'm doing it again. Thank you for being so awesome and sweet and for all the advice you've given me! #lurkersfam Wish you many eggplants and much succ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Have the best birthday ever!

dfjlsdfjösjfef AS EXPECTED OF MY DAUGHTER THIS IS ADORABLE AS FUCK LJSDHFLHSFLHSDFLHGS

[thefernetz]

The winds they did howl, the rains they did pour, the thunder and lightning, knocked on your door, And when you opened, he stood there so grand, the great god of hellfire, from The Fernetz band, The king of of all kings, the master of masters, the man who fearlessly walks into unknown disasters, too clueless to care, too thoughtless to ponder, He does without thinking, he just works his wonders, the magic just happens, it’s a gift that he has, be it death metal, bossanova, hip hop or jazz, lucky Lindex to have him, lucky Li, daughter & son, lucky bastard band members in brutal Puteraeon let us all hail this legend, the man who will save us, Happy birthday you fucker, I’ll see you in Vegas! #thefernetz #puteraeon #godofhellfire #magician #wizard #childprodigy #bastard #deathmetal #guru #idol #eggplant #retard #messiah #thunder #lightning #beer #happybirthdy

[writinghood]

50 randoms heck for some fun

Thanks for the tag @thefonzeis  ♡

1. name? holly beth 2. nickname? evil 3. undercover name? jenny piccolo 4. pornstar name? tippy buttercup 5. middle name? sarah 6. first born son or daughters name? ew children no 7. age first kiss? 12 8. age first crush? 5 AJ from simon and simon  9. age when you first knew what you wanted to do? hmmm..idk 10. age when you met your best friend? 14 it was a cat idec 11. favourite song? i’ve got you under my skin - macfarlane 12. favourite colour? blue 13. favourite film? fight club 14. favourite actor ? kevin spacey 15. favourite actress ? charlize theron 16. favourite time of year? fall 17. favourite animal? platypus 18. favourite country? USA! USA! 19. favourite person in the whole world? my husband...sometimes. 20. favourite food? italian (eggplant parm) 21. favourite feeling? being drunk. oh, i mean happiness. 22. least favourite song? happy - pharell or w/e 23. least favourite film? the love guru 24. least favourite actor/actress? dylan o’brien his face angers me 25. least favourite event? my birthday 26. least favourite food? UCK english peas. YUCK!! 27. least favourite feeling? depression/sadness 28. best feeling in the world? lying by the ac on a hot day 29. quote to the world?  Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead. 30. best memory? the first valentine’s i spent with the husband 31. best gift ever given? life from mom. thanks mom! 32. favourite alcohol drink? beer 33. guilty pleasure? family guy 34. best superhero? spider-man 35. best place in the whole world? at home with my husband and my dogs 36. celebrity crush? seth macfarlane 37. who’d play you in the movie of your life? kelly brook 38. who’d be your love interest ? macfarlane 39. who’d provide to soundtrack to your movie? willie nelson 40. favourite cartoon? looney tunes 41. character /person you can most relate to? dean winchester 42. sun or rain? rain 43. Adele or ed Sheer an? adele 44. Taylor swift or Kanye west? taylor 45. pale or tanned? pale 46. USA or uk? USA! USA! 47. cash or card? card, usually 48. blonde or brunette? both 49. secret talent? writing 50. if you had to make your own religion what would it be? evilism 51. the voice/popstar a audition song ? what? 52. britains/Americas talent audition piece ? sexy mfer by prince 53. favourite Disney movie? snow white 54. do you love or hate game of thrones? love 55. nicest person you’ve ever met? alan tudyk

@insomniasbitch, @thegreatshipcaptainswan

[foolsiwillshowthemall]

Farm Report:  Romancing the dragon girl

Day 5 of summer.  Everything I wanted planted for now is planted, and I've put down a few more stone walkways between the crops.  These aren't just cosmetic, they also help keep grass and weeds from sprouting and spreading into the crops.

Of course, this one corn stalk blocks the pattern.  I'll fix it at the end of the season.

Had a short conversation with Sam on the beach about his dad.  Apparently there's a war on?  And it's going badly for our side?  And Sam's father is off fighting?  I never knew this.  We're really isolated from world events in this little village.

Sam's still an unsympathetic butt, though.

In happier news, my girl Abby is an awesome drummer and is single-handedly saving their garage band.

Sebastian, huh?  Maru's step-brother, I recall.  I think I met him once when he asked me to give him a turnip so he could throw it against the cliff side.  I should probably get to know him better, if he's one of Abby's friends.

You poor baby, Elliot.  How you suffer.

I stop by the tavern after a day of errands and chores. Marnie is pointedly ignoring me.

Still some energy left, though night has arrived.  The sky is completely clear and full of stars.  I head up into the hills for some nigh-time blackberry picking, and come across Maru using her telescope.

She invites me to look through her telescope.

I see above me a dark planet of awesome size perched in its sunless void, an invisible titan all thick black forests and jagged mountains and deep, turbulent oceans ...

Er, I see a beautiful planet.  Yeah.  Definitely a beautiful planet.

I'll have to do this again with her.  So long as it doesn't interfere with her studies.

The next morning, eggplant, wheat, and bok choy are ready to harvest.  Grapes and cranberries are still growing.

Um, no Haley.  I'm not sure what it's for.  I expect something jewelry-related, you seem the type.  You're in luck, I just made a bar the other day to try out the process and have no immediate use for it.  Also, if you want something kept a secret, you probably shouldn’t post it on the bulletin board for everyone to read.

Abigail is such a sweetheart, complimenting me on my looks.  See, Haley, some girls like the burly farmer thing I have going.  And hey, I'm starting to suspect that Abby really might actually be into me as more than a friend.  Ok, Judith, play it cool.

How attached?  Like, could you get me some eggs?

Abby's cute compliment on my looks reminded me that I owe her another amethyst.  I head up to the caves, passing Demetrius who is doing some science by the riverside.  I have a plan this time.  Last time I was in the caves, I found an amethyst on level 11.  Let's see if that's a pattern...

Huh.  Barely into level 11 and there's an amethyst node.  Maybe there is a pattern.  I'm in and out of the caves in under an hour.  Fastest amethyst run ever.

Hey, Sebastian.  So, you're Abby's friend?  No wonder I don't know you, if you spend most of the days in your room.  How's things?  Say, does she ever talk about me?  And is she into girls?  Asking for a friend.

What do you think, sentient scarecrow?  Does Abby like me?

Huh.  I'll take that as a 'maybe'.

The next morning, it's a beautiful fall day.  A gentle breeze is blowing, leaves are flying past in the air, my bees are buzzing and making honey, and there's a letter waiting for me.  I open and read it, and it's from Abby, an invitation by Abby to come hang out in her room after dark!  She does like me!

Did you hear that, Wuffles?  Abby likes me!

Yeah, that's what I said!

I can barely concentrate on my farm chores from the excitement.  The layout of the farm makes it fairly routine, the three-wide crop rows mean I can stand on the walkways and blast water clear across with the charge beam setting of my copper watering can.

Plenty of time to kill before our date.  A bit of fishing from the stream behind Leah's cabin, perhaps.  My mind is still racing, and I barely notice when I catch the largest fish I've ever caught.

I couldn't agree more, Maru.

Right, Caroline.  Positive thoughts.  Say, if Abby happened to be into girls, you'd be totally okay with that as her mom, right?  Just asking hypothetically.

I meet Haley in the park to give her the refined quartz she asked for.  We meet furtively in the park, like a drug deal, looking over her shoulder to make sure nobody sees us together.  And she's way too excited to get this rock.

Kindly stay the fuck away from my farm, you beautiful disaster of a man.

Unfortunately, our planned nightly meetup doesn't go off tonight, as Abby completely loses track of time as she's wandering in the night, lost in her own thoughts.  By the time she's home it's far too late for whatever she had planned.  We chat a bit, joke and laugh, and then agree to try again for tomorrow night.

Eighth day of Summer, and the cranberries are ready for harvest!  I'm planning on making many batches of cranberry jelly from this harvest.

Time for some clean-up work around the farm.  Clearing weeds, I'll be extending the farm down this way eventually.

I really have to wonder what possible use Elliott has for an iron bar.  I know he's not lifting weights or doing anything physically strenuous, not with those skinny poet arms of his.

Speaking of people who don't lift, Haley needs help getting a jar open.

Am I strong?  Bitch,  I am The Farmer.  I chop wood and smash rocks all morning, and then spend the afternoons killing monsters in the dungeons!  I rip small trees out of the ground with my bare hands!  The other day I carried Shane all the way from Cindersap forest to Harvey's clinic by myself, and I wasn't even tired after.  You better believe I'm strong.

I see how it is, Haley.  You're happy to have me open jars for you or slip you some refined quartz, but when we're in public you're all "Eww, it smells like farmer around here".  Well, screw you.  I don't need your affection.  Shane likes me, and Abigail maybe-loves me, and Maru, Harvey and Emily are my friends, and I think Penny might have developed a weird crush on me since I gave her that perfect poppy on her birthday.  I don't need you.

Night falls.  I meet Abby outside, and we head for her bedroom.  So nervous right now...

Oh baby, show it to me.

A spirit board?  Okay.  Not sure where this is going, but spirits and magic are actually real in this world, and I'm starting to suspect that Abby might actually be a witch, so this could be interesting.

...

Your spirit board has a heart symbol on it?  I guess it saves the spirits time not having to spell out 'love'.

Is this going where I think it's going?

Flustered, and clearly not ready for this revelation, she stops the game.

Listen to the spirits, Abby.  They speak the truth.

The next morning, she's waiting for me on the doorstep as I get up.

She stammers out an apology for acting weird, and then runs off before I can say anything.

Poor kid.  She's probably taken by surprise by her own feelings, and probably has no idea how I feel.  She may not even be sure if I'm into girls.  Well, that part I can clear up pretty easily. This town has a quaint tradition of buying a bouquet of flowers to signal romantic intention.  She can't misunderstand that.

I step out to gather my tool, get the mail, check the beehive and the mushroom farm, and then as I turn around who do I see but Marnie heading for my front door!  Hey, you, keep away from my underwear drawer!

She's clearly flustered, and stammers out a transparent lie to explain what she's doing here.

"You want cave carrots..."

"Yep!"

"To train your goat to talk..."

"They're very smart, goats."

"And you expect me to run off to the caves and get you one now?"

"If you get the chance!"

I lean close and smile.  "You're in luck.  I have two cave carrots, right here, ready for you, and I don't have to go anywhere for them."

"Great!  Bring one to my place between 9am and 5pm and I'll reward you!"

"But ...  you're right here right now, you could just take one with you" I try to explain, but she's already running off towards her farm.

Suspicious.

I water the plants, do a few minor chores, and then grab a cave carrot and head off to Marnie's.

"Say, you wouldn't be interested in rewarding me in eggs or milk, instead of gold?"

"Nope!  Just gold!"

"Fine.  Here's your cave carrot."

That woman is clearly up to something.

The big moment.  I arrive at the general store.  Abigail is there. Heart pounding in my chest, I walk up to the counter.

Pierre is happy to sell me the bouquet.  He probably expects me to give it to Shane.  Everyone knows Shane and I have become close.  I've been spending a lot of time with him, checking in on him several times a week and encouraging him to keep going and not give up on life.  Shane is very dear to me, and I'd do nearly anything to help him...

But this bouquet is not for Shane.

Pierre sells me the bouquet, and then looks on in puzzlement as I approach his daughter.  My head is light and my stomach is full of butterflies.  What if I've read her wrong?  What if she doesn't feel the same?

..She feels the same way!  My Abby likes me!

Girlfriend status unlocked.  In you face, Pierre.

Extremely, but I know there's nothing we can't get through together.  You and me, Abby, against the world.

[floralharjuku]

Flaws (repost from Fanfiction.net)

She likes her coffee way too black, the bitter and deep taste and stench of burnt caffeine all too unappealing. Whenever she drinks it, he makes it a point to not kiss her deeply until she's had a chance to either cleanse her palate or brush her teeth. Not out of any distaste for her—never that, he adores her far too much to ever be that way to her—but because the flavor of such strong coffee makes his head throb painfully. His father drank the stuff while he was still alive and it always wafted through the manor whenever it was brewed, giving him aggressive migraines. It's her favorite, so he tolerates it with a smile that makes his eyelid twitch. ... He might as well have diabetes, what with all of the sugar he pours into everything. She's tasted his tea once and spit it into the sink, her teeth aching long after she had expelled it. He had come back into the room, noticed the missing amount and asked her how she had liked it. She had beamed at him with pained teeth and lied right through them that she could really taste the orange. (It was earl grey.) ... She knows that he likes the temperature of their apartment lower because of the climate he was used to back in Tenebrae, which lay to the north, and his office, which might as well be the North Pole. But when she has to spend the summer bundled in sweaters, she begins to find fault in it and starts ticking up the thermostat by two or three degrees. He knows what she does when she thinks he doesn't notice the temperature change. He doesn't mind it much, just ticks it down when she's in the bathroom. ... She's sitting up in bed, scrolling through her phone with the cord extended from the port and continuously charging as she uses it. She always complains when he does business on his laptop when he's in bed, but she can flick through Moogle and not face any criticism. It's a shame too, that she seems so detached from her partner. He's actually in the mood to indulge her strange little fantasies she always tries to prod him into attempting. ... She never actually expected him to say "yes" and now she's in a hole. She's never done anything quite like this before and it makes her face burst into blush. He doesn't laugh when she admits her hesitation, but she can see amusement in his eyes. She spends the night wrapped in the blankets, still embarrassed that he actually agreed to it. ... When she gets sick, he stays home with her, stroking her hair and fetching her soup as she sniffles about how she's going to just die from this horrible disease. She has a cold. It's quite adorable actually. ... She wants to return the favor when he gets sick, but it doesn't seem to faze him in any fashion. He gets up, gets dressed and leaves before she can drag herself out of their bed and she spends the day feeling jilted. When she returns home, still in a funk of sorts, she finds him on the couch, his pale hair plastered to his skin with sweat and his body burning with fever. She spends the night with him, brushing his annoyingly stubborn hair out of his eyes and holding his head when he vomits, once on her pants. She swears that she hears him mutter how sorry he is and how embarrassing this is before he's in a fitful sleep again. She vows never to let him go to work that sick again. It's terrifying, really. ... It's late and he's pretending to work from his darkened home office when he hears her enter, closing the door quietly behind her. She doesn't say anything for a moment, probably still rehearsing the apology that caused her to pause at his door for a full ten minutes. He's been writing his out in the most anal flowchart known to man. It's one way to regain control in a situation where he rightfully had none over her. Control is something he needs to feel useful, to feel as if he has a purpose in any relationship facet no matter if it's professional or intimate. He simply can't stand in the kitchen and let someone make dinner for him; he has to micromanage or even do it himself. (Read: that surprise Valentine's Day dinner that turned into a shouting match about how to cook salmon) And it works in business. It's lauded and applauded that he is such an involved leader, and so young at that. But with her...he can't control her and he would never want to. That willful personality that demands to do things on her own even when the odds are against her and her diminutive stature. (Read: that Christmastime when the building's main elevator was out of service and she insisted that she could carry fifteen gift boxes down fifteen flights of stairs instead of taking the other elevator at the end of the hall like a normal person) That person he cared about above all else. "Noctis—" "Ravus—" They both paused when they said the other's name at the same time. Now it was that awkward pause between two people who couldn't decide who should go first. They were both standing, unconsciously leaning to their other half, willing this frigid argument afterglow to thaw. They never were the couple that was skilled in the art of perfumed words and hollow promises easily broken in the matter of clichés and just enough desperation to sound feasible. They would rather be together and let that end the divide. Still, before she could hold him again, she had to appease her own conscience. "...I'm sorry, Ravus." He steps closer, tentatively at first and when she doesn't shy away in anger, he closes the distance between them. "You don't need to be sorry." He mutters into her hair, holding her with care as if she would shatter in his arms. "It was my fault." "We're idiots." He laughs and she mutters something else into his chest. "What?" "...you're a bigger one." She chirps, reaching up to peck him on the chin. ... He's sweet and considerate, despite always hiding behind his dry tone of voice and computer. She learns this after he meticulously plans her a surprise birthday, despite his own distaste for parties. She could tell that he was strained to the limitations of pleasant annoyance when Prompto got a bit tipsy and started belting out shrieking, half babbled renditions of Yuna singles and the one Carley Rae Jensen song Noctis knew that happened to be the one that drove Ravus to contemplate suicide. But he didn't jump out of the plate glass windows and onto the street below, for which she was eternally grateful. ... She buys him a chocolate cupcake, sticks a question mark candle into the frosting, lights it on fire without torching the curtains and, cheeks red, gently singing "Happy Birthday" to him. He smiles against his own will–why did she get a question mark?–and stops her less than stellar singing voice with a kiss. She's sweet and considerate in her own way. ... When she cries, he doesn't know what to say. It so rare that it takes him aback and momentarily, his brain has to buffer. She sometimes laughs that he's robotic and that moment has to advance her idea. But still. Each tear that falls from her eyes corrodes him and he wants to stay them, but lacks the honeyed words and charming voice to do so. He sits beside her, wrapping his arms around her and brushing his hand over her hair, comforting her by being there. Ravus only cries once during their relationship when his mother passes. She's the same as him, finding it so difficult to give charisma and optimism to a person emotionally fractured. All she can do is bury her face into his shoulder as he shakes with all the grief and pain of a son who lost his beloved mother. ... He's squinting at his cell phone, trying to decipher the lines of emojis she's sent in place of words. He hovers in between 2% and whole when he reaches milk and a double underscored red one hundred, knowing that she liked lower fat for tea but being oh so confused by the message. He doesn't want to face her fat deprived wrath, but also doesn't want to hear her complain about fatty tea. He gets both despite the fact that half of it will spoil in the refrigerator. "Why did you get so much milk?" "...there was a sale." "But why?" "...next time don't send me a bunch of cartoon doodles instead of words." "Seriously? Why didn't you text me back?" "You said you were at work." "Ravus, I work on a computer all day with a bunch of slack jaw coders who throw Doritos at each other. Me using my phone is probably the least distracting thing in that office." "...I'll keep that in mind." "Are you mad? Why are you mad? It's not my fault that you can't read basic pictograms. Geez, even my dad knows this." She teases him by sending eggplants and water droplets in annoying frequency. Finally breaking down, he decided to Moogle the meaning and promptly closed the page, his ears a soft red. How did she even know something this...lewd? He buried his face in his hands when he heard her bark in laughter. ... Her father is staring down the bridge of his nose at him, pretending to sip water for the last four minutes. His glass is magically still full when he sets it down. Noctis is all too aware of the world's most awkward dinner playing out and she is an unwilling actor in it but has no way out of it. And she was also aware of the exasperated looks on her and her mother's face as the older woman pushed her salad around her plate, probably pinching Regis underneath the table with her free hand. She doesn't know why he's sizing Ravus up, since their families have known each other since perhaps the dawn of time, but he is and it's honestly tiring. She is an adult but she adores her father and he wanted them all to have dinner together as a family. One big, happy, neurotic family headed by a psychologically torturous patriarch who enjoyed lobbing overloaded questions in bomb form and demanding that Ravus carry them all in proper form. This was either going to end with Ravus dead or Regis suffering a stroke when that vein in his temple exploded. As long as he didn't— "So, how long have you been sleeping with my daughter?" Noctis's water spewed across the tablecloth, Ravus's grip on his fork tightened and Aurlea took a sharp inhale through her nose, mentally slapping her face with her palm when he clearly ignored the signals she had been sending him through pain. Finally, she turned her head in eerie fashion and muttered something to her husband before turning back to the younger couple across from them. Regis definitely took on a pale pallor but didn't break his gaze on Ravus, expecting an answer. "I...I can assure you that I treat Noctis with the utmost respect..." "That isn't what I–" "Well, that's fine! Right, Regis? That's all we need to know." Her mother was nearing the end of her patience and it showed through each syllable, which increased in shrill pitch. Both hands were under the table and Noctis could've sworn she saw Regis twitch away from her mother. And they still had three courses to go. By dessert, her father has a limp and her mother has been smiling for so long, Noctis thinks her muscles have frozen that way. Ravus has been thoroughly put through the ringer and she's considering dashing her face against the wall but they lived. ...sort of...? ... Their couch is more like a loveseat that irritates their guests because about two children can fit on it at one time. There's other seating, she always has to point out, but she refuses to buy anything to replace her favorite seat. She's on the smaller side and can curl up besides him, her toes under him and back supported by the armrest. He doesn't mind the slight squeeze, just gives her a glance and turns back to the news. For once, he's not watching television while obsessively working and she's relieved by that. She takes a sip of her less than black coffee that has an odor that doesn't offend him as much, pauses for a moment in thought and holds back a snicker. His face changes only slightly but dismisses her laugh until... "Eggplant, water droplets." He chokes on his diabetic tea. ... AN: Do, de do, da. Hi~! I decided to take a break from trying to decipher and encode the complexities of characters in my chaptered works and decided to take a break to write this. It's fluffyyyyyy! :D

[kale-isi]

Birthday dinner follow up. & nsv

For birthdays at my house your main present is you get to choose whatever you want for dinner. My daughter turned 17 today and she chose homemade egg rolls and originally had asked for cake but then switched it up and asked for cannoli for desert instead. I had a delicious sushi bowl with some brown rice, cucumber, eggplant, butternut squash and some of the ground pork I took from the egg rolls and cooked separately. It was so good! But The best part was I still had 243 calories left for desert. The recipe said each cannoli had about 260 cal each including the shell. Awesome. I could have just eaten the one cannoli and been happy coming in 30 cal over my limit. But it was a birthday and tomorrow I am back to 1300 calories and no sugar. So I ate about a cup of the cannoli cream filling with a spoon. I chose to celebrate and indulge. I chose to eat and enjoy this dessert yesterday when A. Asked for it. I don't feel guilty. I actually feel empowered because I controlled myself all day. I didn't use the birthday as an excuse to go hog wild all day. I can do this. Today I fee like I can make it and lose the 130 lbs. like this is sustainable. You do have to be able to enjoy yourself once in a while so I'm pretty proud of myself today.