#edward malone

[eldaryadiary]

Edward Malone and Lord John Roxton, my new OTP.

[theivorybilledwoodpecker]

“I’ll use my own,” said Lord John Roxton, “in fitting a well-formed expedition and having another look at the dear old plateau. As to you, young fellah, you, of course, will spend yours in gettin’ married.”

“Not just yet,” said I, with a rueful smile. “I think, if you will have me, that I would rather go with you.”

Lord Roxton said nothing, but a brown hand was stretched out to me across the table.

-- The Lost World, by Arthur Conan Doyle

This is one of the most beautiful parts in the novel because (spoilers) Malone has just come back from the Lost World. The main reason he went was to impress Gladys. He comes back only to find her married, and she very callously mocks his effort to impress her. Naturally, Roxton thinks Malone is all set to marry Gladys, but when Malone says he'd rather go off with Roxton, Roxton doesn't question him. He just offers a hand that could be comfort, camaraderie, or both. Malone and Roxton will always be my brotp.

[snakeassassins]

Did I not always see some hard fiber in her nature? Did I not, even at the time when I was proud to obey her behest, feel that it was surely a poor love which could drive a lover to his death or the danger of it?  Did I not, in my truest thoughts, always recurring and always dismissed, see past the beauty of the face, and, peering into the soul, discern the twin shadows of selfishness and of fickleness glooming at the back of it?  Did she love the heroic and the spectacular for its own noble sake, or was it for the glory which might, without effort or sacrifice, be reflected upon herself?  Or are these thoughts the vain wisdom which comes after the event?  It was the shock of my life.  For a moment it had turned me to a cynic.  But already, as I write, a week has passed, and we have had our momentous interview with Lord John Roxton and--well, perhaps things might be worse.

"I'll use my own [money]," said Lord John Roxton, "in fitting a well-formed expedition and having another look at the dear old plateau.  As to you, young fellah, you, of course, will spend yours in gettin' married."

"Not just yet," said I, with a rueful smile.  "I think, if you will have me, that I would rather go with you."

Lord Roxton said nothing, but a brown hand was stretched out to me across the table.

every now and then when I see johnlocker talk about how Sherlock Holmes was Doyle’s One True Gay Masterpiece I kind of just think about the fact that he wrote this with his own two hands

[bi-characters]

Character: Edward Malone Appears in: The Lost World (novel) by Arthur Conan Doyle Commonly Interpreted as: straight

But Actually: Malone is in love with a woman named Gladys and wants to marry her. However Gladys seems not to reciprocate his feelings and essentially says Malone isn’t exciting enough, hence he ends up volunteering to go on an expedition to the unexplored plateau (the ‘lost world’) with Professor Challenger and co. During the adventure he names a lake they discover after Gladys, demonstrating he does continue to have feelings for her. He returns to Gladys towards the end of the book though only to find she has married another man, leaving Malone broken-hearted.

However Malone’s interaction with the male characters in the story is rather homoerotic and especially so with adventurer and sportsman Lord John Roxton (himself a heavily queer-coded character), with lines such as “If it were not for our fears as to the fate of our companions, it would have been a positive joy to throw myself with such a man into such an affair”.

At the end of the story, Roxton offers a share of the money he has acquired from diamonds he found on the plateau to Malone and the two professors and says he intends to use his share to set up another expedition to the plateau before adding to Malone, “As to you, young fellah, you, of course, will spend yours in gettin’ married.” Malone though says not yet, adding, “I think, if you will have me, that I would rather go with you.” And there the story ends with Roxton holding out his hand to Malone.

Malone is bi/pan/queer.

With many thanks to tiger-moran for this write up!

[tiger-moran]

I was returning along the well-remembered route, and had reached a spot within a mile or so of the marsh of the pterodactyls, when I saw an extraordinary object approaching me. It was a man who walked inside a framework made of bent canes so that he was enclosed on all sides in a bell-shaped cage. As I drew nearer I was more amazed still to see that it was Lord John Roxton. When he saw me he slipped from under his curious protection and came towards me laughing, and yet, as I thought, with some confusion in his manner. "Well, young fellah," said he, "who would have thought of meetin' you up here?" "What in the world are you doing?" I asked. "Visitin' my friends, the pterodactyls," said he. "But why?" "Interestin' beasts, don't you think? But unsociable! Nasty rude ways with strangers, as you may remember. So I rigged this framework which keeps them from bein' too pressin' in their attentions." "But what do you want in the swamp?" He looked at me with a very questioning eye, and I read hesitation in his face. "Don't you think other people besides Professors can want to know things? " he said at last. "I'm studyin' the pretty dears. That's enough for you." "No offense," said I. His good-humour returned and he laughed. "No offense, young fellah. I'm goin' to get a young devil chick for Challenger. That's one of my jobs. No, I don't want your company. I'm safe in this cage, and you are not. So long, and I'll be back in camp by night-fall."

from The Lost World by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

I like how this shows Roxton behaving suspiciously, implying as if he's up to something really sinister like plotting to betray the rest of them or something but then actually nope, he just wants to surprise Malone with diamonds later.

[aesthetics-of-destruction-blog]

Sometimes I draw dinosaurs. This one is a Stegosaurus.

(Actually it's an episode from Conan Doyle's "The Lost World")

[snakeassassins]

*edward malone voice* we popping the BIGGEST bottles when Gladys marries me tomorrow

[snakeassassins]

Malone: hello I am in love with Enid Challenger you can tell by the way we do literally nothing romantic together anyway we're going to go hunt ghosts even though they totally don't exist

A Ghost: bro you don't love her like that ur hella gay

Malone: ...well gee...... The Gods have spoken.......

[snakeassassins]

The love affair of Enid Challenger and Edward Malone is not of the slightest interest to the reader, for the simple reason that it is not of the slightest interest to the writer.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, not giving a single fuck about his own romantic subplot

[snakeassassins]

The Lost World: A Summary

Prof. Challenger: Hey everyone look! Fucking Dinosaurs!!! I am going to take you all on an AMAZING and POTENTIALLY LIFE-THREATENING mission purely for the sake of stroking my ego!!! Hope you like fighting off deadly pterodactyls!

Malone: Ohmygod this is amazing but also extremely frightening why on earth did I sign up for this someone please help me I don't wanna die a virgin

John Roxton: Me neither. *stares longingly into Malone's eyes while killing everything*

Summerlee: Can I please go home

[tiger-moran]

I awoke to find myself on my back upon the grass in our lair within the thicket. Someone had brought the water from the brook, and Lord John was sprinkling my head with it, while Challenger and Summerlee were propping me up, with concern in their faces. For a moment I had a glimpse of the human spirits behind their scientific masks. It was really shock, rather than any injury, which had prostrated me, and in half-an-hour, in spite of aching head and stiff neck, I was sitting up and ready for anything. "But you've had the escape of your life, young fellah my lad," said Lord Roxton. "When I heard your cry and ran forward, and saw your head twisted half-off and your stohwassers kickin' in the air, I thought we were one short. I missed the beast in my flurry, but he dropped you all right and was off like a streak. By George! I wish I had fifty men with rifles. I'd clear out the whole infernal gang of them and leave this country a bit cleaner than we found it."

from The Lost World by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

So can we talk about how Lord John 'amazingly awesome hunter and one of the best shots in England' Roxton was so distressed by the sight of Malone nearly being killed that he missed this shot.

[tiger-moran]

I have tried to imitate here Lord Roxton's jerky talk, his short, strong sentences, the half-humorous, half-reckless tone that ran through it all. But he was a born leader. As danger thickened his jaunty manner would increase, his speech become more racy, his cold eyes glitter into ardent life, and his Don Quixote moustache bristle with joyous excitement. His love of danger, his intense appreciation of the drama of an adventure — all the more intense for being held tightly in — his consistent view that every peril in life is a form of sport, a fierce game betwixt you and Fate, with Death as a forfeit, made him a wonderful companion at such hours. If it were not for our fears as to the fate of our companions, it would have been a positive joy to throw myself with such a man into such an affair.

Edward Malone in The Lost World by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

[tiger-moran]

The Lost World: A Summary

Gladys: I'm really not interested in you in that way. Malone: I'm gonna do a thing to make you love me. Gladys: But- Malone: See you in several weeks!

Professor Challenger: ROARING *homoerotic grappling!* *explanations and showing of some shitty pictures!*

Professor Challenger: Who wants to do a thing? Professor Summerlee: I don't but I will out of spite Lord John Roxton and Malone: Me! Me! Me!

Lord John Roxton: Even though we've only just met let's go up to my bachelor pad where no ladies ever venture and I will show you my mighty weaponry. Malone: Well OK, I'd like to see your guns. Lord John Roxton: Guns? Oh, right, yes, guns.

*adventures!* *racism!* *dinosaurs!* *more racism!* *professors bickering!*

Malone: I'm going to go for a walk in the middle of the night and not tell anyone and nearly get myself killed, that'll impress them. Everyone else: Shit we got captured by ape men. Malone: Nooooooooooo! Lord John Roxton: It's OK, I escaped to get back to you because I love you. Malone: Yay!

*homoeroticism!*

Everyone else except Challenger: LOL Challenger looks like the ape king. Professor Challenger: STFU!

*ape genocide!* *more homoeroticism!* *suggestive comments involving giant balloons!* *a not actually very dramatic escape back to civilisation!*

Professor Summerlee: Here we did the thing, look at these shitty pictures. Other people: We don't believe you. Professor Challenger: You'll regret saying that you fools! Muahahahaha! *PTERODACTYL!* Professor Challenger: Oh shit should we have shut the window first? Pterodactyl: Fuck you, you loonies, I'm getting out of here. Other people: Should we try to chase after it or...? Professor Challenger: Nah

Malone: Hi Gladys I've finally remembered I wanted to marry you even though the only time I thought of you during my epic homoerotic adventures was when I looked at a lake full of things that wanted to kill me. Marry me! Gladys: Whut. Mr Potts: She's already married to me, suck on that! Malone: Well poop.

Lord John Roxton: Come to my rooms and have dinner with me. Professor Challenger and Summerlee: OK! Lord John Roxton: I wasn't talking to you two, shit. Well OK I suppose you can come too if you must.

Lord John Roxton: Here I secretly found you diamonds because I love you. Professor Challenger and Summerlee: OMG! We can blow all the money on boring shit! Lord John Roxton: I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU TWO THEN EITHER but all right fine you can have some of the money from selling them if you'll leave me alone now with Malone. Professor Challenger and Summerlee: Whatever. Lord John Roxton: I'm going to go back and do the thing again. *looking suggestively at Malone* So you'll be spending your money on getting married then? Malone: I'm coming with you. Lord John Roxton: Yay! *hand-holding*

End

[tiger-moran]

So I was looking at these illustrations for The Lost World.

Everyone looks so done with this shit.

(Malone and Roxton, so done with the professors' bickering disturbing their hot sex.

Summerlee and Challenger, so done with Malone and Roxton jumping each other every ten minutes.)

-

"I know we've only just met but here, let me show you all this phallic symbolism."

-

Lord John "Sassmaster" Roxton knows 657 ways to kill you using just his moustache.

-

"For fuck's sake, Roxton, you're making the rest of us look bad."

Also more phallic symbolism.

-

"Get the hell off me, peasant, you're not Malone!"

-

Any excuse to get his hands on Malone.

(Source: x)

[tiger-moran]

"The Lost World (novel)

This book contains examples of:

[...]

Ho Yay: A bit of this between Malone and Roxton."

Source: x

I have no idea what you mean, I see no ho yay in lines like, 

""Mr. Malone, I understand," said he. "We are to be companions—what? My rooms are just over the road, in the Albany. Perhaps you would have the kindness to spare me half an hour"

or

"I gave a cry of joy as in the cold grey light I saw Lord John Roxton kneeling beside me."

and

""Well, what did they do?" I was enthralled by the strange story which my companion was whispering into my ear, while all the time his keen eyes were shooting in every direction and his hand grasping his cocked rifle"

[tiger-moran]

The slashiest best lines from The Poison Belt:

"But our good humour was restored when we saw Lord John Roxton waiting for us upon the platform, his tall, thin figure clad in a yellow tweed shooting- suit. His keen face, with those unforgettable eyes, so fierce and yet so humorous, flushed with pleasure at the sight of us. His ruddy hair was shot with grey, and the furrows upon his brow had been cut a little deeper by Time's chisel, but in all else he was the Lord John who had been our good comrade in the past.

"Hullo, Herr Professor! Hullo, young fella!" he shouted as he came toward us."

(If you perceive Roxton as straight I really don't know what stories you've been reading.)

-

"Like a wave, the memory of the past swept over me, the good comradeship, the happy, adventurous days—all that we had suffered and worked for and won. That it should have come to this—to insults and abuse! Suddenly I was sobbing—sobbing in loud, gulping, uncontrollable sobs which refused to be concealed. My companions looked at me in surprise. I covered my face with my hands.

"It's all right," said I. "Only—only it is such a pity!"

"You're ill, young fellah, that's what's amiss with you," said Lord John. "I thought you were queer from the first.""

(*muffled laughing*

Also poor Malone baby)

-

"I staggered to the balustrades of the stair. At the same moment, rushing and snorting like a wounded buffalo, Challenger dashed past me, a terrible vision, with red-purple face, engorged eyes, and bristling hair. His little wife, insensible to all appearance, was slung over his great shoulder, and he blundered and thundered up the stair, scrambling and tripping, but carrying himself and her through sheer will-force through that mephitic atmosphere to the haven of temporary safety. At the sight of his effort I too rushed up the steps, clambering, falling, clutching at the rail, until I tumbled half senseless upon my face on the upper landing. Lord John's fingers of steel were in the collar of my coat, and a moment later I was stretched upon my back, unable to speak or move, on the boudoir carpet."

(So Challenger saves his beloved wife and Roxton rescues Malone)

-

"I lay watching Summerlee revive under the same remedy, and finally Lord John took his turn. He sprang to his feet and gave me a hand to rise, while Challenger picked up his wife and laid her on the settee."

(And again, Challenger helps the person he loves and...

Roxton does the same. ;D)

-

"It is no doubt a privilege to hear two such brains discuss the highest questions; but as they are in perpetual disagreement, plain folk like Lord John and I get little that is positive from the exhibition. They neutralise each other and we are left as they found us. Now the hubbub has ceased, and Summerlee is coiled up in his chair, while Challenger, still fingering the screws of his microscope, is keeping up a continual low, deep, inarticulate growl like the sea after a storm. Lord John comes over to me, and we look out together into the night."

(They're not even being subtle any more)

-

"Lord John is sleeping also, his long body doubled up sideways in a basket-chair."

(OK that's not slashy but I think it's adorable)

-

"Good-by, young fellah!" said Lord John."

(He doesn't say goodbye to anyone except Malone)

-

"Sure enough, at the hour named, the car came purring and crackling from the yard with Lord John at the wheel. I took my seat beside him, while the lady, a useful little buffer state, was squeezed in between the two men of wrath at the back."

(There are other seating arrangements they could have had to avoid Challenger and Summerlee sitting next to each other and bickering all the while but no of course Malone wants to sit next to Roxton.)

-

I ran across, and pulling at the list-covered rope, I was surprised to find how difficult it was to swing the bell. Lord John had followed me.

(Of course he had, he's besotted with you)

-

"Young fat-head!" he grumbled. "Can't leave things alone!"

"What's the matter, Austin?"

"Lubricators left running, sir. Someone has been fooling with the car. I expect it's that young garden boy, sir."

Lord John looked guilty.

(Yes I know it's not that sort of lube, it's still funny)