#edgar alan poe fashion

[minty-playhouse]

Round 2 of Eurovision let's GO!

Same deal as last time, just worrying down my thoughts as I watch it hah

Really liking the Denmark song, yes yes! The energy is very good!

Also speaking of energy I'm very salty about Malta not making it to the finals like what the hell, they should have removed Croatia and put them!

Armenia is pretty OK. Just not really my kind of music I guess? It's not even bad but it didn't get me hype, sadly. The presentation is lit though.

Liking the Romania vibes already from the looks alone 👀

Wha- Not the song I was expecting but it was a pleasant surprise! Really like the different style of both song and presentation, hoping they make it to the finals!

Estonia is OK as well. Also not super my type of song, but I can see the merit.

Ah, no way Belgium is 100% gonna deliver, they already look cool!

YES I KNEW IT I WAS SO RIGHT!!! Those are some funky fresh vibes!!!! PLEASE SEND THEM TO THE FINALS LET'S GO LET'S GO!!!! We haven't had this type of music in a while, we should bring it back!

No way I love this so much, PLEASE I WANT BELGIUM TO WIN SO BAD!!!!!

Ah, that's where Graham is, can't wait to see him comment the finals!

I'm sorry Cyprus, this is not impressing me much after Belgium blew my fucking mind lol

OK now that Iceland didn't really hype me much, regardless of how I'm feeling for Belgium, this second round of semi finals is being much weaker than the first, I'm not really getting excited by many songs, which is a bummer because if Belgium doesn't make it I'm gonna side eye a lot of finalists lol

Alright I'm glad I waited to say something about Greece because I'm actually digging this, but it started a little weak. But I quite like the beat.

Yeah OK this song grew on me, good on you Greece!

SYNTHWAVE AESTHETICS??? Hey now, the song kinda slaps too. Really liking the early 2000's pop group vibe.

AH NO WAY THAT'S SOME PUSSYCAT DOLLS SHIT!! Very good, hope they make it to the finals too.

Really cute guy alert on the Slovenian group 👀 Also loving the looks specially the singer's shirt! And the song is pretty good too!! We need more rocking tunes on Eurovision! Please go to the finals!!!

OK I was proven wrong this round is now delivering some good content! Finally some good fucking food.

HOLY SHIT GEORGIA.

Was not prepared for that in the slightest! Really damn awesome presentation and the song is so unique, I like it! Rooting for Georgia as well! It's like Middle Eastern electronic music, what's not to love?

Yeah, damn this round isn't pulling any punches now!!

Honestly Eurovision is such a fun way to look back into fashion, music styles and styles from the ages they are from. It's a super fun time capsule of European vintage tastes.

Oooh, more rock boys with San Marino?? I'm listening!

OK, pretty cool, but the Slovenian boys were still a bit better, but that's because I liked their style more. But I really dig them visually! (and of course the weirdest guy in the group is the one playing the bass, it's always like that!) ((please know that I use the term weird affectionately because I too am weird but I can't play the bass.....))

Austria girlfriends????? 😮

NO WAY EDGAR ALAN POE BOPS???? ABOUT WRITING??? No way, easily my second favourite after Belgium, this is GENIUS!!!!

No way this song is too lit!!!! They didn't need to go so hard, and yet!

Albania's performance is looking and sounding top notch too, great job everyone! When everyone began singing together it was hella cool!

OK Albania just keeps getting better what the hell!

Lithuania's song just changing like that without warning! But it made it a little more interesting for me, I'll admit. The backing vocals are also a mice addition.

Woah, wait up, Australia bringing some fire too! Very cool song and presentation, I'm here for it! Hoping to see them in the finals!

KEYTAR?? NO WAY! That was really good!

Argh, no I will not narrate my reaction to the countries that make it to the finals because I will get angry, I can tell! So let me just post this!!!

[esonetwork]

'Dead Jack and The Old Gods' Book Review By Ron Fortier

New Post has been published on https://esonetwork.com/dead-jack-and-the-old-gods-book-review-by-ron-fortier/

'Dead Jack and The Old Gods' Book Review By Ron Fortier

DEAD JACK and The OLD GODS By James Aquilone Homunculus House 255 pgs

Unlike the overwhelming majority of our colleagues in the pulp community, we have never been fans of writer H.P. Lovecraft. His elaborate myth of the Cthulu and the Old Gods always seemed too grandiose a concept to be effective as good old fashion, gut-wrenching horror. Gives us a creepy Edgar Alan Poe tale anytime. Obviously, we are the minority and over the years have had to endure countless stories wherein various popular occult detectives battled the cosmic deities with their giant batwings and elephant snouts ad infinitum. Everyone one of those left us bored silly.

This brings us to James Aquilone’s third Dead Jack adventure in which, you guessed it, our cynical Zombie detective and his Pillsbury Doughboy homunculus pal Oswald, must save the world of Pandemonium from the Ancient Gods. Apparently, someone has gotten their hands on the dark magic tome known as the Necronomicon and is all set to open up a dimensional portal by which Cthulu and company will make their appearance. At this point, we were ready to stifle a yawn. That never happened in this instance is due to Aquilone’s brilliant solution to the whole Lovecraftian mythos; make it funny. Which is precisely what does work.

Amidst their quest for the book, Dead Jack and Oswald are attempting to work out some very serious relationship issues left over from their last adventure. It seems Oswald has swallowed a magical Jupiter Stone which gives him amazing powers. Though unwilling to admit it, Dead Jack is envious. Succumbing to that emotion, he begins to verbally abuse his little buddy to the point they seek out couples therapy. Somewhere in the middle of this merging of insane plots, it suddenly dawned on us who the two of them brought to mind. Jack and Oswald are the horror/fantasy versions of the classic Hollywood comedy team of Bad Abbott and Lou Costello. It’s all there, from their sniping attitudes towards each other amidst danger to the true underlying sense of friendship and loyalty.

All of this plays itself out by the book’s cataclysmic no-holds-barred battle between their unified avatar and the alien God of Doom. Honestly, Aquilone surprised us again with another entry twice as much fun as the first two. With Dead Jack, things are never dull for a second. Oh, and before we forget, the writer offers up two bonus short tales that are mini gems. The hardest part of reading a Dead Jack novel is reaching the end and having to wait for more. Now that’s cruel.

[carzenriq]

Undercover - Fall 2019 Menswear #PFW - Paris Fashion Week

[kelleah-meah]

Look I Made A Thing ... My Academia Aesthetic Favs

I was just playing around and procrastinating, so I decide to create this silly little share-a-majig about my connection to academia aesthetics.

See, I am still a fan of the academia aesthetics, despite a lot of people criticizing them. So I thought I'd share some of my favorite things and traits that I associate with my 4 favorite variations on the aesthetic: Dark, Light, Chaotic and Art.

Some of my favorites are very much "on brand" for academia, but I also wanted to share treasures that I think are very much a part of the aesthetic but rarely get mentioned in memes. And maybe others will see that the aesthetics aren't static, but can be shaped to your own personality and perspective.

Feel free to share yours by either reblogging and adding them, or by creating your own post telling us all about your favs.

Dark Academia Favs

Fav DA movie

Sleepy Hollow (1999)

Fav DA book

The Complete Works of Edgar Allan Poe

Fav DA philosopher

Arthur Schopenhauer

Fav DA fashion style

Turtlenecks with blazers & cardigans

Fav DA TV series

Doctor Who (British series, 1963-)

Fav DA play

Macbeth by William Shakespeare

Fav DA work of art

Maman by Louise Bourgeois

Fav DA song or music composition

New York City's Killing Me by Ray LaMontagne

Most common DA behavior

Re-reading every email, essay, article and blog post I write multiple times before sending or publishing it

Fav DA guilty pleasure

Buying satchels and messenger bags even though I have more than enough and save photos of cool ones I find online so I know where to look when one wears out

Light Academia Favs

Fav LA movie(s)

Enola Holmes (2020), The Personal History of David Copperfield (2019) and The Rewrite (2015)

Fav LA book

The Complete Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Fav LA philosopher

Lao-tzu

Fav LA fashion style

Wearing berets in the fall & winter and headscarves in the spring & summer

Fav LA TV series

The Librarians (US series, 2014-2018)

Fav LA play

My Fair Lady by Alan Jay Lerner (inspired by George Bernard Shaw's Pygmalion)

Fav LA work of art

The Kiss by Auguste Rodin

Fav LA song or music composition

Feelin' Good by Nina Simone

My most common LA behavior

Drinking a cup of tea to start my day every day

Fav LA guilty pleasure

Buying more books when I visit indie bookstores before reading the ones that I purchased the last time I was in an indie bookstore

Chaotic Academia Favs

Fav CA movie

Clue (1985)

Fav CA book

Frankenstein by Mary Shelley

Fav CA philosopher

Albert Camus

Fav CA fashion trait

Wearing ankle boots or sneakers with everything

Fav CA TV series

Lupin (French series, 2021-)

Fav CA play

Les Misérables by Victor Hugo

Fav CA work of art

The Persistence of Memory by Salvador Dalí

Fav CA song or music composition

Symphony No. 8 in B minor (The Unfinished Symphony) by Franz Schubert

My most common CA behavior

My inconsistent and woefully inadequate sleep schedule

Fav CA guilty pleasure

Eating ice cream out of the carton

Art Academia Favs

Fav AA movie(s)

Moulin Rouge (2001)

Fav AA book

The Portrait of an Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce

Fav AA philosopher

Simone de Beauvoir

Fav AA fashion style

Wearing all dark colors except for a pop of color like lime green, hot pink or bright red

Fav AA TV series

Fame (US series, 1982-1987)

Fav AA play

She Loves Me by Joe Masteroff

Fav AA work of art

Composition 8 by Wassily Kandinsky

Fav AA song or music composition

Bolero by Maurice Ravel

Most common AA behavior

Listening to the same song 6, 7 or 10 times before moving on to the next song just so I can cleanse my "ear palate" and then go back to the previous song and listen to it another 4 or 5 times

Fav AA guilty pleasure

Spending 4 or 5 hours at least 1 Sunday a month working on a jigsaw puzzle

[stingchronicity]

hi i’m kaya !!

she/her 🐠 24 🐠 left boob of @moogotron 🐠 number one fan of @moveslikekeithrichards

special interests: sting & george martin

studying: english literature & german

i post: categorized aesthetics, literature, 60s-80s music, mid-century fashion & ephemera, and some hannibal. fuck dude i guess i post iwtv now too ! #mywife

i follow from: @doktordyper

my og post tag: #psychobabble

recurring hyperfixations: edgar allan poe, hamlet (william shakespeare, 1601), 18th-19th century romantic literature & authors, the addams family (1960s show), fish of all kinds (especially marine fish), and hannibal nbc

assorted past special interests: alan parsons, justin hayward, alan white, keith emerson

[spacedandelions]

The lack of gonzo content came to my attention once again, I have nothing relevant to talk right now but here is my contribution

A beautiful Gonzo picture

An Edgar Alan Poe quote

“There is no beauty without some strangeness"

and 

this links to beautiful gonzo fanart

https://crowscurse.tumblr.com/post/649112516405903360/gonzo-is-my-favorite-muppet-hes-truly-a-fashion

https://an-earwig.tumblr.com/post/649212568083234816/distinct-huh-more-like-extinct

https://afwilliam75.tumblr.com/post/643873162241671168/why-are-there-so-many-songs-about-rainbows-and

[pop-punklouis]

Hiii! You seem really interesting to me and idk so can you tell me your biggest inspirations in art (music, movies, books, shows, fashion, role models... whatever you want) Inhope this is ok for you😁😘

oh god that’s tough. i don’t think i’ve ever really sat down and had a culmination of my biggest inspirations. but if i had to think off the top of my head:

music: billy joel, john denver, dolly parton, depeche mode, boy george, kate bush, ella fitzgerald, the psychedelic furs, amy winehouse, jewel, björk

movies: eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, the new adventures of pippy longstockings, synecdoche new york, burning, blow-up, the exterminating angel, pleasantville, a clockwork orange, cinema paradiso

books: become what you are by alan watts, any of john o’callaghan’s poetry, the cask of amontillado by edgar allan poe, the unabridged journals of sylvia plath, other minds: the octopus, the sea, and the deep origins of consciousness by peter goddfrey-smith, pippy longstockings, flowers for algernon by daniel keyes, the girl who cried flowers by Yolen, the power of identity by manuel castells

fashion: 80s new wave, early victorian, art nouveau, and deconstructionism

[catherineblake]

I miss the time of the university …when the biggest problem was extorting myself from social gatherings, when gothic licorice jellies were in fashion, and me …me in black robes, with Type O Negative in headphones, standing off the path, reading Edgar Alan Poe and immensely in love …in love with the world, in what it can give me – in the future – and how much I liked my black boots and dark glasses.

For me, the university was what finally extinguished my joy of living among people. But as long as it lasted, as long as I was there, smelling the roses from the janitor’s garden, it was wonderful.

Maybe a gothic jelly will help? Only now the black ones have the flavor of forest fruits. Not as darkly romantic …but definitely delicious.

[morebedsidebooks]

The Poe Clan by Hagio Moto

The award-winning supernatural series referencing Edgar Allan Poe that first gave Hagio Moto her fame, The Poe Clan also bears the honour of being the first shôjo comic trade paperback by publisher Shogakukan in 1974, to which it sold ridiculously well. As such it’s a bit hard to state the importance of this work. Though I’m also writing about it in 2020 where comics history and classics can certainly be interesting in their own right but, all the same readers who will be opening their wallets paying for a premium hardcover English edition are also looking for an experience.

In many ways The Poe Clan is a mood, though this is not my first time reading it, as with several titles by Hagio who remains one of my all-time favourite artists, I own it in Japanese as well. The story weaves around a group of European vampirnella under the House of Poe that through dire circumstances end up inducting adolescent protagonists Edgar, Marybelle and Alan as members all too young, and various humans who have encounters with them. One of Hagio’s earlier works it still has many hallmarks which would become familiar of her style. Pages with swirling art and regular cacophony of symbolism can speak in a way with the beauty, the violence, the inner mind and turmoil of its characters and queer subtext. Dark bits of humanity and tragedy are on display in the series.

Though the non-linear nature of the narrative could go along to prove the expression “there is no rose without a thorn.” Made up of episodic installments traveling around the mid-18th to 20th centuries, the multiple editions over the years have presented the chapters in various orders. The English edition of volume 1 of 2 collects six chapters in the publication order of: (1) Limpid Locks of Silver, (2) The Village of Poe, (3) Glensmith’s Diary, (4) The Poe Clan, (5) Marybelle and the Silver Rose, (6) The Birds’ Nest.  If one is so inclined to read in chronological order through 1744-1976 chapter 5 is actually the first, followed by chapter 1 and then one needs to go to the second (yet unreleased in English volume) and back again several times. (In the last few years in Japan, two further sequel volumes were released and it is expected to once again return to serialization this year.) I debated not doing a full review until all of the 1970s series was out in English (particularly since one of my favourite chapters isn’t included in the first volume). However, this first volume of The Poe Clan was frankly the best book I purchased in 2019.  And as I tend to do, I enjoy closer readings comparing editions.

Translator Rachel Thorn is a veteran of the highest caliber. Once again, she brings the English text real life in historical consideration with language and flavor, such as points of antiquated spelling and speech captures the poetic or, when the setting shifts to West Germany incorporating more German in some places than the original. Hagio in not unusual fashion has also made an update. But then it is the lettering and retouching which attracted more of my attention. The Japanese edition I own can feature some awkwardness at points, so I suppose it’s difficult to critique, yet the English edition also shows in spots less polish than I would expect in a premium edition. The sfx font choices sometimes jumped out seeming coarse compared with the rest what is present on the page as well. Every so often fancier text was left alone, other times disregarded in replicating. None of these quibbles are at the level of problems that marred The Heart of Thomas when it was released in English where an earlier draft went to print. Still, if the albeit small publisher Fantagraphics insists on releasing Hagio’s work in premium editions is it too much to ask that one could get the best quality the market offers? There are essentially three volumes worth collected here yet, I can’t help but lament no digital option offered as well which would benefit readers.

In 2010 the English translated market for Japanese comics was in rather a different place, editions of Hagio’s work were just beginning again to be published since the first couple titles brought over in the 1990s. It’s been a pleasure to see such editions bring her work (and other classics) to more people over the last decade. While I can and have purchased all the releases Fantagraphics has put out by Hagio, I am not in the position of having to do so to simply experience her work.  As I look at my burgeoning shelves and shrinking space every print book needs to earn its place by being special in some way. Even now I consider The Poe Clan a special title and the Fantagrahpics release a gift. Here’s to seeing readers discuss the second volume too.  And more of Hagio’s work published in English in 2020 (Lil’ Leo is licensed by Denpa Books) and hopefully beyond.

  The Poe Clan by Hagio Moto is available translated to English by Rachel Thorn, in hardcover from Fantagraphics

[art-now-germany]

The Maze, Bastian Raiss

As a child, I read through all kinds of books, the tales of Greek and Roman mythology were right there along with the Grimm brothers, Edgar Alan Poe, Astrid Lindgren, Hemingway, Mandrake and many others. Richly illustrated art books were at reach too, so that in the child's mind, all these things coexisted in the same universe. Some images stayed ingrained, so that decades later the Minotaur communicates with Bernini's Theresa in extasy, while the backdrop of the streets of Sao Paulo transports them into the 21th century, still very much alive. PS - the city map behind the Minotaur is a collage, everything else is painted, old fashion style.

https://www.saatchiart.com/art/Painting-The-Maze/58970/3107689/view

[collectorscorner]

CC Blogger - New Arrivals @ Collectors Corner : Wednesday - 11/13/19 Complete list of items shipping to the stores, some items may be limited in availability. If you see anything you want to purchase on the list and are not a subscription member at Collectors Corner, just contact us and let us know if you want an item held at the stores. email - collectorscornermd@comcast.net Subscription Membership & Free Membership Card : Collectors Corner's No Obligation (FREE) Membership Card or FREE (In Store) & ONLINE Subscription Membership saves you 10% Off ALL Bagged & Boarded Comic Book Back Issues, Board Games, Graphic Novels, Manga & Special Orders. Plus Never miss a comic again! Computerized and organized + you can add and cancel titles on your subscription list from home on your own time, or in the store when you pick up your comics at : Maryland's Coolest Stores! Since 2001. 3 Convenient Locations - CC PARKVILLE HQ 7911 Harford Rd Parkville, MD 21234 CC BALTIMORE - OUTPOST 403 North Charles St. Baltimore, MD 21201 CC BEL AIR - OUTPOST 17 N. 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[templeofgeek]

Edwin Camacho Rivera Owner of The Dapper Rocker

Something we have noticed while doing our Temple Of Geek Chic reviews is that although there seems to be a great deal of geeky clothing and accessories available to men, there are hardly and styles that men can combine into their everyday work life. And there is almost nothing in the way elegant geeky clothing for men. The Dapper Rocker is able to combine elegance and pop culture into something with unique style! These “Ascots With Attitude” are a perfect for the geek who wants more out of their fashion choices. 

Edwin Camacho Rivera is the proprietor of the neck wear shop called The Dapper Rocker. It is predominantly an ascot shop with pieces ranging from elegant to brash to geeky and has been around since 2016.

Edwin tells us “I was inspired to sew and knit by my sister. And one day, while wearing a handmade to work and receiving comments about it looking like an ascot inspired me to look them up, and I was able to make my own. The overall intent of my designs is to create something distinct from the other ascots, so some designs are classy, others are eccentric, and others are geeky. Concerning the geeky side, I have been a geek for a very long time, but have never cared for most things that stores carry in terms of clothing and accessories. So, I came across spoonflower.com and other places to create pieces that can be geeky and yet sophisticated. Each style is made in small quantities.”

These aren’t costume pieces or cosplay pieces, but they could absolutely be used that way. They are versatile in their function. The pieces are subtle enough that they can be worn with your every day attire. But they are also statement pieces. A way to express exactly who you are through your fashion.

Doctor Who Inspired

We are already geeking out about these Doctor Who Ascots! We don’t get to see much in the way of Doctor Who fashion that isn’t cosplay or a graphic tee of some sort. Doctor Who style has always been pretty elegant. From the time of the First Doctor all the way up until our current 13th incarnation of The Doctor, you can’t deny that the Doctor has style! Although at times a little silly, The Doctor has always been very well dressed.

The 12th Doctor’s Polka Dot Shirt from The Episode Kill The Moon

12th Doctor Inspired Ascot

The black and white polka dot ascot is inspired by the 12th Doctor Episode “Kill The Moon”. Biggest thing we love about this is the detail! It is such a great representation of the shirt worn by Peter Capaldi as the First Doctor. The material is a very soft and glossy satin. It has a gorgeous shine that our pictures just do not give justice to.

7th Doctor

7th Doctor Inspired Ascot

The 7th Doctor was absolutely all about patterns. His style was vibrant and playful and so are these ascots! We love anything that pays homage to Classic Doctor Who! This 7th Doctor ascot absolutely does that! One thing to keep in mind when purchasing an ascot is to look at the measurement. Not all necks are built the same. Make sure you know your neck size before ordering!

The 13th Doctor

13th Doctor inspired Ascot

Jodie Whittaker made her groundbreaking debut this year as a 13th Doctor! Inspired by the 13th Doctor’s rainbow shirt this ascot beautifully captures the 13th Doctor’s vibe.

The Daleks

Dalek Inspired Ascot

The Daleks may be the Doctor’s worst enemy but we are loving this Dalek inspired ascot. The nice thing about this design is that it very recognizable as a Dalek pattern, but it would only be recognizable to other Doctor Who fans. To everyone it would just be a bold accessory choice.

We had cosplayers Doc In The Box and Dylan of Final Form Cosplay put The Dapper Rocker to the geek test. They combined the ascots with pieces they already own. Both from their everyday wardrobe and also with their cosplay pieces.

Edgar Alan Poe Inspired

The lovely thing about people is that we are not just one thing. We don’t have to necessarily have to fit into one box and neither do our style choices. I am a big fan of the eccentric collection that The Dapper Rocker offers. These Edgar Alan Poe inspired accosts are romantic and elegant. They show of your more refined and poetic tastes. These ascots and cravats are inspired by two Edgar Alan Poe poems, The Raven and Anabel Lee.

Anabel Lee Inspired Cravat

Raven Inspired Ascot

Overall we are big fans of The Dapper Rocker and we are happy with the styles an choices offered. Be sure to know your measurements before order and message The Dapper with any questions you may have. Keep in mind that these items are handmade and that quantities may be limited. You can find these items and more at thedapperrocker.com and on Instagram at @thedapperrocker.

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  “Oh Brilliant!” Thirteenth Doctor Inspired Ascot. Link to my shop is in the bio. #thedapperrocker #cravat #ascot #ascottie #neckwear #mensfashion #doctorwho #thirteenthdoctor #geekchic #handmade #etsy #smallbusiness #bronxbusiness #madeinny #madeinnyc #madeinthebronx #madeinnyfashion

A post shared by Edwin Camacho Rivera (@thedapperrocker) on Sep 28, 2018 at 3:14am PDT

  The Dapper Rocker Brings Elegance to Geek Style Something we have noticed while doing our Temple Of Geek Chic reviews is that although there seems to be a great deal of geeky clothing and accessories available to men, there are hardly and styles that men can combine into their everyday work life.

[centrifuge-politics]

Brick Club 4.5.5, 4.5.6

A beautiful Cosette...I seriously doubt that bobs were in fashion around this time but she’s working it.

Ok, for the sake of the tone of these posts, I’m going to carefully lay aside my romantic misgivings and go ahead and jump into the freezing water. I’m on board now, I promise.

“The education which she had received had always spoken to her of the soul and never of love.” All agape and no eros (to wildly simplify). The nuns, and Valjean for that matter, are experts in a sort of all encompassing, saintly love that is more conceptual than actual and haven’t prepared Cosette for anything else. Valjean, at least, has graduated to being comfortable with familial love but there’s something in him that is wary of this new kind of love, to the point that seeing it in Cosette is frightening, “he would have shuddered before that luminous and unknown joy which flashed from her eyes.” It’s something he doesn’t understand. I’ll allow that Cosette pinpoints Marius’s substance with impressive accuracy, if a slightly romanticized bias. She’s a good judge of character. “It had been written with the foot in the grave and the finger in Heaven.” Yes, that’s an accurate depiction of Marius’s whole…life orientation currently.

It’s actually really, really charming to see that, just as Marius thinks of ‘Her’, Cosette has been carrying a torch for this nonpareil ‘He’, not extinguished in the slightest by the distraction of handsome military men (who, if we are to trust Theodule’s word, wasn’t interested anyway). Cosette really is the absolute best and I love her. “She could really conjecture nothing,” she tells herself, a pretty wild juxtaposition to Marius building entire fantasy lives in his head after glimpsing her once, yet “she would refuse herself nothing.” I want her to have everything and she deserves it.

The sacred and profane are one and the same again in this rekindling of young love, “this celestial chance, this intervention of angels, was that bullet of bread thrown by one robber to another robber.” Nothing is small and all works for all.

How fascinating to see Marius through these eyes. He’s like the love child of a brooding hero of some Gothic romance and an Edgar Alan Poe character. “He had, under a veil of incomparable sweetness, something of death and of night.” Not really my type, but I’d be a fool to underestimate the unexplainable magnetism Marius seems to exude. I also hold Cosette’s taste in very high esteem and I trust her judgement.

I would give…anything to see a scene of Marius listening to Cosette belt the tenor line of the Hunter’s Chorus from Euryanthe. Actually, I would give anything just to hear that myself. Their dynamic is just…still so good, I’m such a sucker. Marius: So…do you love me? Cosette: Shut up, of course I do.

I’m glad they talk! I genuinely think these two crazy kids are ridiculously compatible once they get into the nature of their beings. Beyond the parallel in their childhoods, I think they would really balance and support each other in a really unique way.  Marius needs a positive, grounding influence and Cosette would absolutely benefit from a passionate, deeply emotional force in her life. Marius would help her start to engage with a deeper and darker side of herself that Valjean refuses to broach with her.

[sirtravisjacksonoftexas]

Is Jesus a mythical figure, based on the Sumerian goddess Inanna? Um, NO, and here is why:

Inanna was the Sumerian goddess of war, fertility and love. Queen of both Heaven and Earth, Inanna was known to the Babylonians as Ishtar (though the stories about Ishtar have differences from that of the Sumerian Inanna, reflecting different theologies). Inanna was considered the protector of prostitutes, and she was at times depicted at the keeper of the tablets of the Me, or cosmic laws. She fell in love with a minor god named Dumuzi (known to the Babylonians as Tammuz), only to lose him to the underworld. In some accounts this was for half of the year (fall and winter). When she had him for the other half, plants flourished (spring and summer).

Jesus Mythicists will claim that Jesus is based on this goddess, or that her cult at least influenced the Gospel stories. 

Considering this, I think it is an appropriate time to laugh.

Now that that’s over, let’s try to answer this question again without laughing.

Is Jesus based on…Inanna?

Let’s see why this is NOT the case.

1. Born of a virgin? 

No, she is the daughter of the moon god Sin, aka Suen aka Nanna, and Ningal (though in some sources her mother is not named). She was conceived the old-fashioned way.

3. Visited by Wise Men or Shepherds after she was born? No. Her lover Dummuzi was the god of shepherds, but there is no story of him visiting her after her birth.

4.Star proclaimed her birth?

No. She was identified with the planet Venus (aka the “Morning Star”), but this wasn’t a sign of her birth. If anything, it was symbolic of her descent into the underworld and return from it (Venus disappears and reappears in the night sky).

5. Miracle worker?

Yes, just like any other deity, big deal.

6. Bread and wine miracles? No.

7. Clothes stripped?

When Inanna went to the underworld, she had to pass through seven gates. At each gate, she had to discard jewelry (and at one point even her Me tablets). Eventually, at the seventh gate, she shucked her dress. According to Jesus Mythicists, this is supposed to be the basis for Jesus being stripped naked before being hung on a cross.

However…there is a problem.

You see, it was CUSTOMARY for those being crucified to be naked ! Roman soldiers were allowed by law to take the clothes of a person who was being crucified.

And what were the Roman Soldiers doing to Christ’s clothes in John 19:23-24?

Taking his clothes and casting lots, to see which one of them to get the clothing!

The story of Jesus being stripped naked wasn’t based on Inanna’s forced striptease; it was based on the Roman method of crucifixion.

8. Crucified?

No. While in the Underworld, the 7 judges of the underworld killed her with the “perishing stare of death.” Afterwards she was hung on a hook. (remember, Jesus died on the “upper” world, not under).

Oh, and by the way: Crucifixion wasn’t invented in ancient Sumer (the first civilization). It was invented in the 6th century BC, around 1400 years after the Sumerian Civilization ended.

Jesus Mythicists will protest, however, saying that, despite these facts, both Jesus and Inanna hung while dead; Inanna on a hook, Jesus on a cross. Thus, the latter must be derived from the former!

This objection is so weak that it doesn’t even deserve a response...But I’ll give one nonetheless for the fun of it. 

In UFC 3, a fighting event held in 1994, a master martial artist named Keith Hackney (5 feet 11, 200 pounds) fought Emmanuel Yarborough, a sumo wrestler who was 6 feet 8 inches tall and weighed at the time over 600 pounds. Yarborough was strong enough to curl 315 pounds 20 times  in a row. In terms of size and strength, Keith Hackney was outmatched, but by the time the fight was over…Keith Hackney emerged victorious. He was nicknamed “The Giant Killer” afterwards.

Now, Keith Hackney’s accomplishment is quite similar to fairy tale and mythological stories involving normal sized men or women facing giants, overcoming them with guile (think “Jack the giant killer”, or Odysseus and the Cyclops in Homer’s “Odyssey”). He did use superior fighting styles and strategies in that fight, thus outsmarting and outfighting the Sumo colossus.

Does this similarity with fairy tale stories like Jack the Giant Killer and myths like Odysseus mean that…Keith Hackney never did defeat Emmanuel Yarborough? Does it mean that his fight with Emmanuel Yarborough is a fiction, based on fairy tale stories and myths of normal sized  people overcoming giants?

Then why would Jesus’ crucifixion be based on Inanna hanging on a hook?

9.  Went to the underworld?

After he died, Jesus descended into Sheol (In the New testament called “Hades), which was pictured as being in the earth (Acts 2:31, Ephesians 6:8-10, see also Matthew 12:40). This was the Hebrew underworld. Afterwards, Jesus rose from the grave. True, Inanna went to her version of the underworld and returned as well…but so did numerous ancient mythological figures (and even monsters) who are never said by Jesus Mythicists to have striking parallels to Christ.

Hades (who shared the same name as the underworld. He was given charge of the underworld by Zeus, his older brother. He nevertheless rose back to the world of the living for a short time, to kidnap Persephone).

Persephone, as stated above, was kidnapped by Hades, who took her to the Underworld. She was eventually allowed to leave , but before she went she was tricked to each the Pomegranate of death. As a result, she can only stay on the earth for two thirds of every year. The other third, she has to go back to the underworld).

There were several others, such as Orpheus, Sisyphus (  (Had told his wife not to bury him or make offerings to him (customary offerings for the dead) if he passed away. When he did die, he told Hades about his lack of burial and offerings and asked permission to go back to earth to make sure that these things were done. Hades let him go…but when he realized that he had been duped, he dragged him back to the Underworld) , Hermes ( Watched over Hercules while he was in the underworld, but left when Hercules did. He also accompanied the spirits of the dead as they made their journey to the underworld. Being the messenger of Zeus, he would have no doubt sent messages to the god Hades.), Theseus (Theseus (went to the Underworld, was imprisoned by Hades, but Hercules freed him and brought him back to earth) and Cerberus, the three headed offspring of the monsters Typhon and Echidna (the latter half woman, half snake). 

The latter lived in Sicily in one version of her myth, the Peloponnese in another. Thus, Cerberus would have been conceived while on earth, only to be taken to the Underworld to keep its spirits within…only for Hercules to bring it out of the underworld and take it to the ancient Greek city of Mycenae.

Not much of a parallel then. 

Keep in mind: Inanna died while in the Underworld; Jesus died before going there.

10. Dead for three days?

No.

After waiting three days, the goddess Ninshubur (aka Nincubura) went to several gods, pleading for help. She visited Enlil first, but he refused. She visited Inanna’s father Sin/Seun/Nanna next, but he also refused. Then she visited Ea aka Enki, who,  despite being angry with Inanna, agreed to help. 

How long did this take? 

How long was Inanna in the Underworld?

We don’t know. The ancient texts do not say.

Indeed, we have to remember that Ninshubur had to wait three days after Inanna descended into the Underworld before seeking aid, not three days after Inanna died (Inanna didn’t know that she was going to be killed). We don’t know how long Inanna’s journey through the Underworld took, or at which point in those three days that she was killed.

11.  Resurrected?

Yes, but not by her own power.

Ea made two sexless beings and sent them to the underworld, to ease the suffering of Ereshkigal, Inanna’s sister and Queen of the Underworld. When Ereshkigal asked them what reward they would like, they asked that they would be allowed to revive Inanna. This was granted, and Inanna resurrected (though some sources use the word “reborn”), and eventually returned to the upper world.

Inanna’s resurrection is more similar to those in the Bible involving mere humans who were resurrected by God, instead of Christ, who is God incarnate and resurrected…himself.

Not much of a parallel, eh?

Folks, the comparisons between Jesus and Inanna are abysmally weak. Indeed, she oddly enough has more in common with Moses than with Christ (Had a set of law tablets, brought plagues on Sumer (Turned all  the well water into blood, then brought floods, and finally sandstorms. She did this because the Shu-kale-tuda, a gardener’s son and Sumerian, raped her while she was asleep), but these similarities don’t mean that Moses was a fictional character based on Inanna (once again, consider the parallels between Alexander the Great, a historical figure, and Achilles, a mythical one. Recall also the similarities between the Novella “Futility/Wreck of the Titan” and the Titanic disaster, which occurred 14 years later, as well as Edgar Allan Poe’s “The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym of Nantucket” and the sinking of the Mignonette. Plus, the differences between Moses and Inanna FAR, FAR outweigh their few similarities.

No, Jesus was not based on Inanna, who was a myth.

Jesus…is real.

Sources: 

“Epics of Early Civilization” by Michael Kerrigan, Alan Lothian, Piers Vitebsky, and Jeremy Black (Consultant), 36-41 “The Ultimate Encyclopedia of Mythology” by Arthur Cotterell and Rachel Storm, 288 (See also 30-31, 47, 51, 74-75, 82-83

https://www.ancient.eu/Inanna/ 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fb4KIFtdRPI&feature=emb_title 

“The Penguin Dictionary of Classical Mythology” by Pierre Grimal, 133, 189, 197-99, 434 UFC 3 DVD

https://www.sherdog.com/news/articles/1/Keith-Hackney-Where-Is-He-Now-30163 

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0352563/ 

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1156762/?ref_=nmbio_bio_nm 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVs4930ERGw&feature=emb_title 

https://books.google.com/books?id=5lmrCQAAQBAJ&pg=PT90&dq=Who+is+Inanna%27s+mother?&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiO-uum7ZHlAhUPiqwKHYDgB-4Q6AEwA3oECAYQAg#v=onepage&q=Who%20is%20Inanna's%20mother%3F&f=false 

https://www.exploratorium.edu/ancientobs/chichen/HTML/caracol3.html 

https://www.history.com/topics/ancient-middle-east/sumer 

“The IVP Bible Background Commentary: New Testament” by Craig S. Keener, 313 “In the Footsteps of Jesus” (A National Geographic Book), by Jean-Pierre Isbouts, 263  

https://www.britannica.com/topic/crucifixion-capital-punishment 

https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1172309229585125376.html?refreshed=yes 

https://sirtravisjacksonoftexas.tumblr.com/post/628113211750776832/do-supposed-parallels-between-the-gospels-and 

“Encyclopedia of Gods” by Michael Jordan, 114-15  

[tube-thoughts-blog]

tube thoughts vol. 2

zero stars - terrible, 1/2 a star - dull, 1 star - folly, 1 1/2 stars - lacking,   2 stars - fair, 2 1/2 stars - decent, 3 stars - terrific

zack snyder's 300: Rise of an Empire *Lady warrior commandeers the battle scenes and saves it from being a male meat fest like the first film.* 3 stars

rifftrax presents "Independence Day" *One way to make this movie more moronic would be if social media existed in its world at the time.* 3 stars with riffing 2 without

Cannon films "Ninja 3: The Domination" *Spunky shinobi, you must avenge me!* 3 stars

Septic Man *Municipal shit-storm* either zero stars for grossness or 3 stars for grossness and surrealness

"The Stuff" a Larry Cohen film starring Michael Moriarty *Ba-da-ba-ba-ba, I'm lovin' it.* 3 stars

Farscape premier episode *Awol from the ratcage.* 3 stars

Garth Marenghi's: Darkplace "The Creeping Moss from the Shores of Shoggoth" *Brocolli from space. I'd thought it had tasted odd.* 3 stars

Albert Pyun's "Omega Doom" starring Rutger Hauer *It's nice to know after we've killed ourselves off, through constant warfare, sentient robots will become gun nuts and start acting out cold war westerns.* 2 1/2 stars

Kenny vs. Spenny: "Who Can Sell More Bibles?" *The Devil is in the details.* 3 stars

Masters of Horror: Clive Barker's "Valerie on the Stairs" *Another bodice-ripper.* 2 stars

"I Spit On Your Grave" uncut 1978 either zero stars or 3 stars

"Beyond the Door" *Paranormal pregnancy with personality.* 3 stars

Twin Peaks: "The Condemned Woman" *Josie and the pine weasels* 2 1/2 stars

Lost and Found Video Night: Vol 7 -- 3 stars

Seinfeld: "The Frogger" *George's high score.* 3 stars

Kolchak, The Night Stalker: "Mr. R.I.N.G." *What's the difference between right and wrong? robot need to know.* 3 stars

Everything is Terrible "The Rise and Fall of God" *Homeschool is the answer.* 3 stars

Roger Corman presents Andrew Stevens' "Subliminal Seduction" featuring Sharknado's Ian Ziering and Critters' Dee Wallace Stone *CD-ROM Inception meets Tommy Wiseau's "The Room"  type inept erotic thriller.* 3 stars

David Cronenberg's "eXistenZ" *Jennifer Jason Leigh penetrates Jude Law's port hole in order to play an addictive and twisted version of The Sims.* 3 stars

rifftrax presents "The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring" *Butter scraped over too much bread.* 3 plus stars with riffing 3 stars without

"Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone" *Han Solo babysits a brat-pack ginger cutie, Ernie Hudson is Lando, and Michael Ironside is a Darth Humongous who believes that Earth Girls Are Easy.* 3 stars

"Riddick" *Robinson Crusoe machismo* 3 stars

Farscape: "I, E.T." *My name is Mud.* 3 stars

Dominion: pilot episode *Bright light city gonna set my soul on fire.* 2 1/2 stars

"Thor: Dark World" *Science lady Padme pines for Adam of Eternia so that she inadvertently stumbles into the evil fudge and awakens the 9th Doctor Keebler Who causes the realms to converge like ornaments on an imploding Christmas tree.* 3 stars

"Priest" *Paul Bettany's Obi-Wan character is disenchanted with his forced retirement  in a Catholic 1984 dystopia and his regret filled dreams lead to the wasteland where his  fallen knights of the old republic partner, a cowboy from hell Karl Urban, lurks about with his horde of bloodsucking bandits and xenomorph vampires. A decent cameo from Brad  Dourif as a snake oil salesman. This movie's biggest flaw is that it forgets  the classic genre work of Sergio Leone,  John Carpenter, and George Miller and instead mimmicks the cliche Matrix ripoff style hack work of Paul W.S. Anderson's Resident Evil flicks.* 2 stars

"Scanners 2: The New Order" *If you get inside me, go gently, and easy on the nosebleeds. This kind of telepathic power in the hands of a fascist P.D., no thankee.* 3 stars

Joe Bob's Christmas Special: Charles Band's "Pets" *Inhabits the same universe as other weird,  dumb kids' adventure comedies like 'Garbage Pail Kids', 'The Super Mario Bros Movie', 'Ernest Scared Stupid', and 'Problem Child 1 & 2'* 1 1/2 stars

Sami Rami & The Coen Bros present "Crimewave" aka "The XYZ Murders" *Reminiscent of the Three Stooges, classic Mel Brooks, 40s cartoons, humorous Tom Waits song tales, and the original SNL.* 3 stars

Udo Kier in "The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Miss OSbourne'  --sexploitation-- *Show me where it hurts. Fill me with  hatred. My pleasure is seeing your dead body.* 3 stars

Masters of Horror: "Right to Die" *The crispy, vengeful ghost of Terry Shiavo.* 3 stars

William Lustig's "Vigilante" starring Robert Forster & Fred Williamson *Regular Joe nihilism* 3 stars

rifftrax presents Ridley Scott's "Alien" *H.R. Giger porn on the sattelite of love.* 3 plus stars with riffing 3 without

Josh Brolin is DC's "Jonah Hex" *Sometimes spooky, often dumb B-western that's sadly too gutless to show any blood n grit. Still it might fit into a marathon of 'The Quick and the Dead', 'Five Bloody Graves',  'Navajo Joe', and 'Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter.'*  2 stars

"Rhinestone Cowgirls" 1982 --xxx-- *Easy listenin' and screwin', plus plenty of other prickly  situations protruding in Cactus Corner.*  2 stars

Kolchak, The Night Stalker: "Primal Scream" *Unfrozen caveman mauler.* 3 stars

"Shogun Assassin" *Daddy day samurai* 3 stars

Monstervision with Joe Bob Briggs: Dino De Laurentiis presents "Orca" *starring Richard Harris as a salty sea-dog, Charlotte Rampling as a sensitive marine biologist, Bo Derek as a sexy shipmate and Shamu snack, plus the indian fella from 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' lending his wisdom by saying things like,  "The old ways no longer work. Now, even our gods dance to a new tune."*  2 1/2 stars

"Baron Blood" *Decent dubbing, giallo lite, moody nightscapes, cursed castle, creepy stalking.*  2 1/2 stars

Garth Marenghi's Darkplace: "Illuminatum & Illuminata" *Interviewer: Do you believe in the Horned One?  the actor Todd Rivers: You mean the Hoofed One? Interviewer: Yeah.*  3 stars

Beavis & Butthead: "Time Machine" *Butthead: 1832, that's like not now.  Beavis: Yeah, aren't we more than that?* 2 1/2 stars

Twin Peaks: "Wounds and Scars" *"A country habit. We are so very trusting."* 3 stars

Monstervision with Joe Bob Briggs:  Wes Craven's "The People Under the Stairs" *A ghetto version of Twin Peaks' "Black Lodge" where "Hills Have Eyes" type inbred freaks are trapped in the cellar and "Sometimes further in is the only way out." in a twisted Tom & Jerry style game of cat & mouse.* 3 stars

Masters of Horror: "We All Scream for Ice Cream" starring Lee Tergesen, William Forsythe, and the kid from Bad Santa and Eastbound & Down *The Good Humor Man returns from the land of the popsicles to scoop out and dish some cold and sticky revenge.* 3 stars

Gun Fu John Woo and Risky Bidness Tom Cruise present: "Mission Impossible 2" *We've got the cure, we made the disease. Dianetics incorporated.* 3 stars

Tim & Eric present: Bedtime Stories "Hole" *Spitting surreal absurdism sometimes sidetracks the sinister suburban satire.* 2 1/2 stars

MST3K presents: Charles Band's "Laserblast" *Moppy-haired stoner with a muscle-van gets to rain down the fire of the lizard alien gods on his stereotypical 70s burnout and redneck cop enemies in his one horse desert hometown.* 3 stars with riffing 2 without

Farscape: "Exodus from Genesis" *A hot time in the roach maternity ward in the outer reaches of the universe, tonight.* 3 stars

"Saga, Curse of the Shadow" aka "The Shadow Cabal" *Somewhere between Peter Jackson's LOTR and LARPers that run around yelling, "Lightning bolt, lightnight bolt, lightning bolt!"  2 1/2 stars

"Night of the Loving Dangerously" --xxx-- *With the allure of his ever-wanton ex-wife, Traci Lords, private dick, Peter North, is pulled into a web of blackmail involving his ex's new fiance- a perverted CEO  with everything to lose, Jamie Gillis,  his naughty daddy's girl daughter, and gay son's snooping photographer boyfriend.*  2 1/2 stars

Monstervision with Joe Bob Briggs: "Poltergeist" *Joe Bob maligns Spielberg's involvement with a Tobe Hooper horor flick, Heather O'Rourke gives me the sads, an 80s kids bedroom is full of nostalgic shit, the mom looks sexy even with a streak of grey hair, there's some kind of message about the sinister nature of suburban sprawl,  a sassy medium with a drawl steals the show, and Joe Bob ponders the difference between "Go into the light" & "Stay away from the light."* 3 stars

Lost & Found Video Night Vol. 5 *Hot diggity tallyho* 3 stars

"Purely Physical" 1982 --xxx-- *Schmaltzy motel fornicating where the lovers' lips refuse to move when the pillow talk gets filthy.*  2 1/2 stars

Kolchak, The Night Stalker: "The Trevi Collection" *Fashion victims. Some hilariously bad acting from a witch.* 3 stars

"Gallowwalkers" starring Wesley Snipes *Spaghetti vampire western. The kind of movie Blade 3 should have been.* 3 stars

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back & Return of the Jedi ---despecialized editions--- *Impressive. Most impressive* 3 stars

Monstervision with Joe Bob Briggs: 1954's U.S. version of "Godzilla"  & "Godzilla vs. Mothra" *Tokyo stompin' in a Texas trailer park.* 3 stars

"Manborg" 2011 *Will Ferrell's 'Westworld', Scott Pilgrim vs. Mega City 1, Napoleon Dynamite 2: Judgment Day, Tom Green's 'Total Recall', Jim Carrey's "Battlefield Earth', Sam Raimi's 'Mortal Kombat: Annihilation', Paul Verhoeven's 'Army of Darkness', Patrick Swazy, Jacki Chan, Jake Busey, and Cynthia Rothrock  in 'Revenge of the Sith'.*  3 stars

Masters of Horror: Stuart Gordon presents Edgar Alan Poe's "The Black Cat" *Pluto, the little devil.* 2 1/2 stars

rifftrax presents: "The Last Slumber Party" *More potty-mouthed and homophobic than a Wayans Bros. "Horror" "Comedy" "Movie"* 2 1/2 stars with riffing 1 1/2 without

The Outer Limits: George R.R. Martin's "Sandkings" starring Beau & Lloyd Bridges *Red menace* 3 stars

rifftrax presents: "Battlefield Earth" *L. Ron Hubbard's  The Passion of the Prometheus as acted out by the rat-brained man-animal, John Travolta.*  2 stars with riffing 1 star without

Monstervision with Joe Bob Briggs: Mel Brooks "Spaceballs" 3 stars

rifftrax presents "Fantasic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer" *Fate of world hangs in balance while obnoxious bantering, obnoxious celebrity  style wedding is overshadowing focus, obnoxious background extras actors mug for the camera and stare at the pop culture status heroes, obnoxious twirling mustache Dr. Doom villain moments, obnoxious studio thinking Galactus is a stupid concept and yet going through with having his threat to earth being the plot-- leaving us with a cloud of lame spacedust* 1 1/2 stars with riffing 1 star without

Troma presents: Lucio Fulci's "Rome 2072: The New Gladiators" *Televised brutality in a cyber-disco dystopia where the cities of the future are painfully obvious scale models covered in Christmas lights and dirtbikes along with karate chops are still considered pretty badass.* 2 1/2 stars

--- Game of Thrones: Season 3 episode 1

*The inept, pudgy comic relief gets to stumble around  in the snow avoiding ice zombies,

the dashing dwarf gets dissed by dear old dad,

the high class pimp positions himself near the daughter of the woman who always shunned his advances,

the would be future queen shows kindess to orphans and gets politely scolded for it,

a crow defects to the king beyond the wall,

a fiery zealot harshly deals with infidels,

a shiprecked war veteran brother puts himself back in harm's way to try to talk sense to his witch's pussy whipped brother,

the king of the north returns to his scorched hometown and imprisons his mum there,

a puppy eyed dragon mama sails with her seasick soldiers and goes shopping for baby slaughtering drone warriors while narrowly escaping creepy child with scorpion assassination attempt.*

3 stars

-------------------------------------------------------

rifftrax' Mike Nelson riffs "Predator" *"Speak mono-Slavic-ally and carry a big stick."* 3 plus stars with riffing 3 without

George Lucas & Ron Howard present: "Willow" *In order to save a red-headed bastard baby, Frodo Skywalker  fellowships a force of ragtags including a Han Solo in Pocahontas drag, an indian in the cupboard Kevin Pollack,  and a wizard lady trapped by spell in the body of a wombat.*  3 stars

rifftrax presents: "Twilight: New Moon" *A frigid, psycho chick gets dumped by her prissy,  older, unhealthy obsession. she then begins having night terrors ruining  the sleep of her closet gay lumberjack dad. next, she begins leading a lovesick  puppydog around on a leash while getting wreckless on a mopad, attempting suicide  for attention and all before going on a sisterhood of traveling pants adventure to a pretentious Anne Rice version of faggy Europe. 1980s teens were awesome. 2000s teens are awful.*  2 stars with riffing 1 star without

---- monstervision with Joe Bob Briggs:

"Slaughter High" aka "April Fool's Day"

*These jokers aint' f-f-f-foolin'. They like their drugs, they like their sex, they like their cruel pranks on nerds.

Unlucky for them,  their 10th year class reunion takes place at the now abandoned old high school in the middle of nowhere on a rainy night.

It's the perfect setting for an old dark house horror mixed with Agatha Christie style revenge picture.

This is one of the best episodes of monstervision.

It features a classic 1980s slasher flick, it has the original mail girl, Joe Bob skewers the logic of the TNT censors, and he reads an awkward letter from a male admirer named Rufus.*

3 stars

---------------------------------------------------------------

"A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors" *Freddy flew over the cuckoos' nest* 3 stars

The Outer Limits: "Valerie 23" *Do androids sleep mode with electric wet dreams? 2 be or R2D2? See, I could think of some existential questions to ask my prototype sexbot over a romantic dinner, especially if she were the first sentient being of her kind, and had Hulk strength for no apparently necessary reason.* 2 1/2 stars

Jamie Gillis in "Midnight Heat" 1983 --xxx-- *Rare grime. A gem of a different time. Seedy NYC.* 3 stars

Masters of Horror: "The Washingtonians" *Patriotic blue hairs set their wooden teeth on edge about the disclosure of that rich colonial tradition of chomping on cherry tastin' child flesh.* 2 stars

Farscape: "Throne for a Loss" *Rigel, the royal pain in the rear.*  3 stars

"Hellraiser 2: Hellbound" uncut *The stigmata of Sigmund Freud, from the makers of 'Scratch it, sniff it, squeeze it, suck it,' now available at finer novelty shops.* 3 stars

Twin Peaks: "On the Wings of Love" *Hangover cures, hidden secret half-sister, hallelujah for the hard of hearing, hometown beauty pageant queen hitlist, and hoot owl hieroglypics.* 2 1/2 stars

Monstervision with Joe Bob Briggs:  Randy Quaid in "Parents" *A Norman Rockwell painting hanging on the wall behind the desk at the Bates Motel.* 3 stars

The Outer Limits: "Blood Brothers" *Twelve immortal monkeys* 2 1/2 stars

"Kill List" 2011 -- *This feels like it could be a Garth Ennis story. It has old mates drinking together and shooting the shite about life. It has acts of extreme violence almost to the point  of dark comedy. It has a bleak poignancy. There's also the occult undertones like a Hellblazer comic.* 3 stars

William Hurt in Ken Russell's "Altered States" *Waiting, in a fish-bowl, for Godot.* 3 stars

Kolchak, The Night Stalker: "Chopper" *Stunt motorcycle riding, sword slashing specter with separation anxiety.* 3 stars

Farscape: "Back, and Back, and Back to the Future" *"Psychic Spanish-fly," alien lady combat, genetically structured spy seductress, quantum singularity also known as a blackhole used as a soul saving secret weapon of mass destruction that is seriously in jeopardy of being stolen or accidentally set off."* 3 stars

"The Wind" starring Meg Foster, Wings Hauser, & Steve Railsback *Swept up in stormy solitude and story.* 3 stars

The Outer Limits: "The Second Soul" *Lending our dead bodies, like they were used cars, to alien parasites, leads to some serious moral implications. Feels like a 50s style sci fi message about the dangers of multiculturalism given a more progressive twist at the end.* 2 1/2 stars

"Virgin Witch" --sexploitation-- *Prissy Galore throws a feisty spell when a group of dysfunctional devil worshippers decide they really, really fancy her.* 2 1/2 stars

Van Damme / Raul Julia "Streetfighter" *"Who wants to go home, and who wants to go with ME?!" Self aware dumb fun.*  2 1/2 stars

rifftrax' Mike Nelson riffs "xXx" starring Vin Diesel, Samuel L. Jackson, & Asia Argento *Double Ohhh Seven sez, "Do the DEW, dude."* 3 stars with riffing 2 stars without

[aechive]

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