#eat shit and DIE rn

[infamousbeans]

HE MADE FUN OF A COMMENT I GOT ON A FIC. DIVORCE.

[undead-cypress]

When everyone was saying Will was a p3mc clone I was like lmao no you unenlightened masses Will is an Ai Wonder Egg Priority clone. Their eyes are even in the same spot. Ai got isekaied, transitioned, and a tan after running around in the desert for a week.

But now that I've played enough to confirm my suspicions

[major spoilers]

WILL IS A SERPH CLONE. They never got over having to make DDS2 without Godai. Hythlodeus V crashing the funeral Jenna Angel style wasn't just coincidentally similar it was an active call back. Sanctist church outfits lookin like Karma Temple outfits and hexagon skill attainment menu and transforming into big monsters and I'm sitting with my head in my hands. The QDS remake I asked for is MRF. Rip out your heart. Break giant eggs. Gender isn't real. Schrodinger is here. Become non-binary

I. I have to make the video essay about QDS at this point. I need people to understand. QDS 3-5 is probably never getting officially translated but MRF is so clearly echoing the same character journeys. GRIUS. IS LUPA

[wystiix]

Early morning, when dawn is just starting to creep over the horizon, when you and the world are still deep in slumber, is Robin’s favourite time of day. She’s always been one to rise with the sun, stirring as the first rays of light slide into the room. There’s a soft, delicate sort of peace that can only be found in the early hours of the morning, where it feels like time ticks slower, as if the moment is hers and hers alone.

It’s bliss, letting the birdsong and cool air wake her. Still drowsy, she stretches her hands above her head, eyes half-lidded and blinking away the blur from her vision. She presses her hand to her lips to stifle a yawn, before glancing over at the other side of the bed. 

If Robin had to pick a favourite part of waking up early, she wouldn’t hesitate to choose the first moment of the day where she looks over and sees you. You, with your sleepwear all creased from shifting around during the night, your relaxed face devoid of any stress lines, your evened-out breathing making your chest rhythmically rise and fall. She adores every side of you, but the sweet, sleepy state you’re in when she first wakes up is the most beautiful of all.

But today, she only finds a dent in your pillow and a rumpled blanket tossed aside, with you notably missing. All of the traces of lethargy in her body disappear, and she jolts up in alarm. You never wake up before her, nevermind leave before her. It was beyond out of the ordinary for her to wake up alone, with no slumbering body by her side.

Robin rose from the bed, sliding her feet into her slippers. Her footsteps were light, barely making a sound as she walked through the hallway, following the distant sound of music. 

She pushed open the kitchen door to find a curious sight: you were by the stovetop, leaning over a frying pan with a spatula in your hand. There was a tray adorned with a plate stacked high with pancakes, a glass of water beside, and her favourite golden syrup. On the corner of the bench, your record player was crooning out an upbeat love song, the tune echoing sweetly across the room.

“Oh,” You turn as she enters, smiling at at her. “Good morning.”

“My darling,” Robin sighs as she walks over, resting her cheek against your shoulder and sliding her arms around your waist. “I didn’t see you when I woke up. I was worried.”

You hum, turning the stove off and draping your arms around her neck. “I’m sorry, I woke up early and thought I’d cook breakfast.”

Robin inhaled, sighing again at the heavenly smell. She pressed a quick kiss to your cheek, murmuring into your skin. “Don’t apologize, lovely. They smell delicious.”

The pancakes are sweet, the texture soft and melting in her mouth. As you eat, the record continues to play, switching to a soft ballad, one that was playing the first night you met. Between bites, Robin steals glance after glance across the table, watching you take sips from your drink and bites from your food. 

Somehow, all the mundane moments were the times that made her heart flutter the most. You falling asleep on her shoulder in the middle of a movie, the pair of you cooking dinner together every night, even just doing laundry while you idly told her about your day, every second she got to spend at your side was the highlight of her day. 

It was almost possible to imagine her life before you came into it, before you became such an important part of her daily routine. It was clear to anyone that bothered to look that she loved you, adored you so much more than words could describe. There was no one, no one at all that she’d rather spend her time with.

“What’s with that look?” You ask, rousing her from her daydream. “Do I have something on my face?”

Robin shakes her head quickly, laughing under her breath. “Oh no, nothing like that. I’m just glad to have breakfast with you.”

Any time of the day spent with you was perfect, but mornings like these were priceless.

- 🕸️

oh my god.

web anon im gonna kiss u what the hell i just woke up to this /pos.

allow me to read and put my commentary on the tags

[mrdragonageherself]

Farmers and zookeeper from publically funded conservation zoos care more about animals than vegans ever have

[ableedingpromise]

I should just clean my room and take bath or something

[terresdebrume]

... I don't know if it's because my period is ending but man the mood swings today and yesterday were Not Fun

[constantvariations]

V9C5

Got that post-workout bliss and a plate of pizza rolls, so I’m raring to go!

Post Ep: whoever decided the rusted knight “twist” should step on a lego every five minutes for the rest of their lives

Wait why is Ruby running? The last episode ended with the caterpillar being dropped through the floor by the cat, so are they running from the cat? Was the growth yogurt ready, and if so did they grab it ($50 on no)

“I’m so glad the four of you are still the four of you.” Is this excluding Little because they didn’t get hit with the Character Arc tm dust? (Now that I think about it, why didn’t Little have a vision? Did we just not see it or are they immune somehow?)

“You’re the one who ditched us in the first place” okay, Weiss, firstly Ruby stopped following the cat so that’s mostly on her. Secondly, why are you being antagonistic to the one creature you can’t afford to offend because it’s the one creature who can get you to the tree?

“...someone return to the Ever After.” How can you return to a place you’re already in? Is there a reprogramming center or something? If you veer too far off from your role you get reset? Reminds me of the re-educators of the Dragon Age Qun

They’re really laying on thick the whole “Everything is what it isn’t, and what it is, it wouldn’t be” (shout out to that one Shinedown song from the live action Alice in Wonderland)

All this talk of what happened to the caterpillar just sounds like a shitty mishmash of the Ship of Theseus, Schrodinger’s cat, and a reset button

So the Red King underwent the Ever Again program (I’m just gonna call it that, roll with it) and came out a kid? Was that by design or does everyone basically get reborn? Does that mean the racoon hasn’t been Agained since Alyx?

Oh they call it Ascension? How Devil May Cry of you. Also I ain’t calling it that. I like my Agained verbage

“Nose hair from a leprechaun.” I am half expecting a Rocket Racoon bit here

Straight up ditching someone you know is acting off because ~ew nose hair~ is... something else. And there goes Blake trailing after Yang’s coattails again because we! need! that! bee! bait!

This cat is far too lenient with these assholes. They just straight up jumped on his head without asking because who needs to respect people’s autonomy amiright fellas?

Goddammit bring the cat back right now I can’t stand Little’s voice and cOmEdY

Okay all the lights going out one by one is hella creepy gg

“I thought this was lost forEVER” why does Ruby sound like a highschool girl complaining about drama this deadass made me burst out laughing Also, is that the same sword from the Red Kingdom or a different one?

Okay the android is cool as shit I will admit that. The chain as hair is absolutely fantastic

Was that Summer in the axe blade? An axe is not what I would have expected of a Ruby clone. Those are hard-hitting and slow, usually used by the tanks, while Summer and Ruby’s figures suggest more agile approaches. If it were more of a hatchet size, I could see that, especially as a dual-wield

Pocket dimension blacksmith shop? Sign me the fuck up please

I think I’m going to strangle Weiss. You literally just saw her standing in the middle of the road, staring at and talking to nobody, and you fucking whine? I hope someone stabs her with her own tiara jfc

“It contains a mother’s promise” BITCH WHEN WAS THIS ESTABLISHED AND WHY WAS THAT THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OF TO GIVE AWAY I’M GONNA BURN A FIRE HYDRANT

“We do not ascend” oh you mean die? That thing you said didn’t happen here? Dying? Was there even a second reading of the script or did yall just smoke with the originals?

Yes Ruby go right past the hostile creature instead of literally any other direction. Yall deserve whatever hell you make

Why is Ruby carrying everyone constantly? Their legs aint broke girl. Go be a distraction while they go for the yogurt goddamn

The giant jackrabbit’s cool ngl

Like how one scoop only grew them to doll sized but whatever was left after it was splattered grew them all to the right size

The jackrabbit’s name is Juniper. Both cute and cringe

GODDAMMIT IT HAD TO BE JAUNE

WHY

HE FELL LAST

THAT SHOULDVE BEEN YANG

FUCK YOU CRWBY

[riotbeankai]

feel like absolute shit and everything is so difficult rn and I hate that for us

[euclydya]

at this rate i jgitj as wlel fuckjg have. Dark Lunch [advanced dinner].

[fangomango]

This bitch got grounded 😘

[throwawayblog-thrwaway]

why is that the same people that encourage folks to be themselves and be weird are like. vehemently polyphobic lmao

[arcadequeerz]

Also a special fuck you to anyone using their religion to say this is God's doing.

[thekhoei]

aUghhhh was in marxist lenin philosophy stuff stuff and i feel like wanting him and im crazy bc my medical check result is like im dying young (ig) (damn)

[suavis]

i need to be put down like an old dog fr 😔 now that my teen years are over suddenly i have every problem at once

[jackass-jones]

Had a very bad day Gotta eat gravel