#eat shit and DIE rn
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HE MADE FUN OF A COMMENT I GOT ON A FIC. DIVORCE.
#eat shit and DIE rn#UGHGHG HOW DARE YOU WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT THATS SO MEAN WHAT THE FUCK#infamous.txt#or i guess he made fun of specifically the title of my fic and a fucking line from it#>:(#i sent him a text and then i deleted it. damn it. do i just want to wait until tomorrow to talk to him? i guess#im sick of always being the one with a problem#why can he have a god damn problem with me for once#cant#i know I've probably fucked up somewhere right
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dust and horror angel and demon themes,,,, they could totally parallel each other...... :3
dust=angel of death described in the delta rune prophecy (self declared) (i DEFINITELY elaborated on this one waayyyy before but anyways dust with a fucked up savior complex SAVE ME SAVE ME.... death is a blessing ass guy. life is torment and he will be the one to liberate monsters from their bodies and with the strength they provide to him be able to take down evil evil creation of pure misery that is the human āØāØāØ dont worry his evil cackles are to HIDE HIS PAIN of saving everyone....... trust)
horror=demon that dragged everyone in horrortale into hell (as perceived by everyone else) (i think it would be a cool hc if everyone outside of snowdin viewed horror as literally a demon. maybe undyne preaches that. anyone outside of snowdin might be WAYYY worse because they starve for longer and literally take part in cannibalism so they might not have the same sort of mild sanity that snowdin residents do,,,, besides he DID kinda bring them all eternal suffering. kinda. nobody but undyne knows what happened at the core so she could totally just paint the story to blame horror fully)
ANYWAYS i like the possible dynamics this could have :333
dust to horror (please let me kill you PLEASE let me kill you i can end it all so peacefully wouldn't it be nice??? i promise ill make it quick just for you),,, horror to dust (i want you to live and suffer with what youve done i want you to watch all of your choices hit you one day and i'll be there and laugh at you. i'll keep you alive just to keep you suffering ok?)
OR dust to horror (you dont deserve to die you dont deserve to even be hurt by me. not because youre the exception but youre the Exception i absolutely loathe you so youll never get the sweet release of death :3) and horror to dust (just let me die already i dont wanna be here. youre supposed to be a savior right??? an angel?? then why don't you save me already when i need it more than anyone else)
#SHITS THIS OUT BECAUSE I NEED TO GET RID OF IT. my evil doppelganger will adore this post i've already shown them#this is definitely a bit of an exaggeration of their characters in my eyes but i love it :333#i dont think that dust is THIS deluded in my eyes and i dont think horror is this cynical. even tho theyre both still these traits#i came up with this idea while writing my mtt meets eachother fic :3#you can probably totally guess where i made the connection. thank you horrortale undyne for this one single thing#anyways i dont know how to shove killer into this LMAO. i was thinking like.... angel and demon on your shoulder to swap choices#but but triglycercule doesnt killer already have that with his stages??? well YES but both can be true at the same time :333#idk i dont have enough brain juices for this rn. so you get this half assed explanation ššā¼ļøā¼ļøā¼ļø#dust: we should kill this person. totally because they need to be freed and not because they piss me off#horror: no we should keep them alive but torment them so they never get the sweet release of death and suffer#and thanks to killer THEY CAN DO BOTH!!! YAAAAY!!!!! the powers of determination are awesome man (smug tiktok emoji)#dust is sounding awfully similar to a certain killer au of mine i made..... swapinverse rearing its ugly head once again smh#idk if this is more of a symbolic thing or LITERALLY angel dust and demon horror#because i like both ideas........ imagine an actual angel dust and demon horror going around with killer doing the little dialogue i said#what would killer be in this??? he's not a mortal or a human as would be per usual when describing whats between an angel or demon#killer as a god lmao..... noooo noooooo..... maybe just something akin to one. i meaaan technically-#someone who's more into religious theming would probably eat this idea but i cant be bothered uaghhhh#if i say anything about killer i will get shot. but i can tank a couple bullets. killer does have the ability to let both dust and horror#fufill their own ideologies. and also i am a big fat SUCKER for killer keeping horror and dust 'in line' IDC if its a bad sanses concept#i love it and therefore it's now mine to use in an only mtt context. otherworldly beings trio ā¼ļøā¼ļø aghhhhh#i have like 89 drafts if the drafts reach 100 by the end of the year i think i'd DIE. so this is getting posted idc#you wont see me using literal angel and demon dust and horror. but if you look in my mind you'll see the themes regularly in what i talk ab#anyways back to writing this stupid fic i go. dust is currently battling several inner demons rn. good luck loser :3#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#sans au#utmv#tricule hc
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God this twitter block finally began affecting me. If I have to keep going for months without seeing my fav cod fanartists art Iām actually gonna go crazy.
#umiko posted new shit on the side tt n I CANT FUCKING SEE ITT#elon musk please eat shit n die PLZ#Iām like š¤š½ this close to making online friends for the single purpose of getting twitter screenshots#thatās how insane I feel rn#umikochannart#new soap art Iām gonna die#if anyone sees this and is sweet and lovely enough to dm me a pic Iād literally die for youā¦
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hi everyone, this is my monthly check-in <3
#not feeling so great lately...there's a lesion on my other knee now#and it most likely is cancer.#they want me to wait another 10 days for an mri???? like ur crazy#if u think i can wait that long.#sighhhhhhhhh.#anyway.#some cool things have happened#like spending all day in nyc with my partner on friday <3333#and um. i did wnt to vent about smth so uh.#ED tw#lately#my energy has been too low for me to wanna cook. which in turn made my stomach shrink a LOT#since i've been surviving by grazing on snacks.#and i didnt even realize i lost weight until i went to the doctor.#i didnt realize though that it would be even MORE lost when i weighed myself without my winter clothes#and uhhhh. i currently weigh what i weighed in my senior year of high school#which is the FIRST time i've been under a certain number in over SIX YEARS.#and i havent struggled at all w body negativity or ED thoughts in over a couple years. but.#now that my ideal gender expression has shifted more to the feminine side. and now that ive lost weight.#my brain INSTANTLY latched onto that#and was like omg YES do more of that#and it feels nice. this time im FINALLY not struggling to suppress my appetite!!! my body is doing that for me!#and obviously im still eating enough to live on#but still a huge caloric deficit. and rn my wheelchair shit keeps breaking on me. my mobility company is INCOMPETENT.#and my insurance might tell me i have to wait FIVE MORE YEARS for another type of chair......I WILL DIE BY THEN.#ugh everything is so complicated now. and im ALWAYS exhausted bc the sun sets at 4:30. i've just stopped binging and i replaced it with+#a LOT. of retail therapy. i've easily spent probably 1500 of my credit limit in the last 2 months. but you know.#that and not eating are 2 of the ONLY things i can control rn. out of all the fucking bullshit these useless people and my body put me thru#anyway. i'm sure you can tell how i feel rn. i'm just going to try doing anything else today.#vent
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i could turn jacob seed. i could make him forgo his brothers orders and see through him for what he was evennn if he was maybe right about montana getting nuked whateverrr like what everrrr okay
#hes genuinely such an interesting character when you give it 5 seconds of thought after the obvious hotness of him okay like i GET that#i DO wanna fuck him too i GET it but dude hes a disillusioned war vet on the brink of suicide when joseph finda him again and the ONLY#reason jacob didnt eat a bullet was because somebody gave him a purpose. and he followed it. not even blindly he had his doubts but it was#something to live for and someone to protect and who better than his own little brother#even bwfore the dlc came out i was like ok even if everything went according to plan you Cannot see jacob surviving that shit#he had a death wish he did naught want to live. he fully intended to die in the process you cant convince me otherwise#im saying so much nothing rn LOL idk i just have had nobody to talk to about this game and its been 6 years. so.#just. jouist fuckin. i like this character so much. i think he served his purpose for the game and i get why he had to die#but i do still wish there was more to explore with him ykwim#anyway im just annoyed bc i wanna read about him but all anybody ever writes abt is how good at sex he is with women and its like . yawn#HE DOEESNT EVEN STRIKE ME AS SOMEONE THAT WOULD EVEN CASUALLY FUCK IS THE THING LOL like you flirt with him and hes like what the fuck#are you doing. who the fuck do you think yourr TALKING TO#can anybody hear me???? does ANYONE get it
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wrath š
u fucking whore i hope you (buffering. reload. reload) live your life far away from me where we never have anything to do with each other again. iām sick of being the bigger person and i have a right to resent you for what youāve done actually you piece of shit. i will not forgive u. good luck with your life but i will win. iām better than you and i will win.Ā
#i canāt give up girlies#i wonāt die and in ten years weāll meet again for the reunion and u will see#embracing hatred and spite#i really need to eat something before i lose my marbles for real#āru mad at me about somethingā boy the audacity. quit asking this#reason u donāt know is the very reason iām so pissed off in the first place#iām the abnormal one for not being over this entire shitshow by now but i have never felt a normal proportion of emotion about anything#this is established#you on the other hand donāt give a shit about anything#ion wanna pretend iām ok with this rn get the fuck out of this country already#go home#get ur rich family to buy u that m2 and terrorize the english highways what the fuck do i care#iāll buy my whip with my own money motherfucker#man iām a bad friend#iām a bad person#added to list of posts i should probably keep in my drafts but i donāt care; this is my house#huuuuuuu ion wanna talkkk right nowww but what the fuck am i supposed to say#āru mad at me?ā yes very much so#why? misplaced sense of entitlement maybe??? iām evil?? iām silly and childish and not being fair to you#i donāt want to talk#splitting headache#deep breath. donāt be a sissy little bitch and say the right thing. let me cook
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i dont want to be forced to lay back and work at some low budget shithole that barely counts as legal in regards to employee treatmemt because some stupid assholes decided my art that takes time and actual effort because true experience and soul goes into it wasn't enough compared to the flashy buzzword string of the cool new ai that doesn't require basic humane treatment and pay
sorry for my rant i just fear that a basic fundamental part of my entire identity will be worth nothing because of selfish capitalist assholes
#anti ai#fuck ai#fuck ai everything#yes even the music covers#even the funny haha voice ones#ai sucks#fuvk you fuck you eat shit die kus#kys ai bros#die#i literally do not care die die die die#im never this fucking angry i hate you all so much#this has been my only hope since i was like 5#and its being taken by selfish assholes i hope you all explode and fucking rot in hell#die rn#rant
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I should just clean my room and take bath or something
#that would help me feel better im sure i think#and maybe eat but i dont want to eat rn#snack time#uhh but i hate all the snacks there are#even the snacks in this house arent for me wow#and she knows i hate them too lol#and then she gets mad when i say theres nothing and says well you shouldve got some!! WITH WHAT MONEY. BRO OH MY GOD SHE MAKES ME WANNA PULL#all my teeth out i cannotytttttt#and its not like we go out she uses that stupid app and then cries about it costing more on the fucking apo like yeah no duh#i like going out too so idk why she blames me for this kind of thing#ohhhh we never go outttt. well yeah. i have no money for transportation or food. tf u want me to do#i dont even have a map. you wont recharge my goddamn phone#then you cry about wishing there was a man in this house like ok. maybe you should just help me out a little most of this shit i could do#what is your problem!!! die. well this is all discounting the fact of my social anxiety and language problem but like. i can push through#you make me do that all the time anyway so#whatever#i dont know anymore this just pisses me off#i wish i could burn this whole house down#or blow up this entire country yeah
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i need to meet more faekin but fae in a rabid dryad decomposing creature kind of way
#fae kin#most faes i meet are the light spring types#i need to be in a cave#or a mole hole#the cave is slightly damp and dirty but the mouth has a running waterfall for showers#i have mushrooms growing out of my limbs and little moths eating holes in my skin#but dw its exfoliating it'll grow back#fuck I'm high rn#i need cicada-esque wings that I pierce lost and found earrings and jewelry into#just shit i find on the ground#i need to make crafts and cook with dirty hands and clean in the river#five eyes and dirty feet#my phone's gonna die typing all this bye
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... I don't know if it's because my period is ending but man the mood swings today and yesterday were Not Fun
#Matt has a life#Shit from home#Yesterday I remembered there will be a time in my life where i can no longer have a pet because I'll be too old and likely to die before it#which led to me remembering death and having an anxiety attack#today i saw someone pull a dog by the leash#and since it's khmer new year next week I can't get out of my head that this dog might be a dish rn#and it's not morally worse than doing it to a cow#and/or if it got hit in order to make it move#and I'm just sad#ETA: And right now I'm swamped with the feeling that I've been wasting my life and missed out on everything and will miss out on everything#so you know#fun times#i guess at least it's likely gonna be better after i eat/sleep/shower
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V9C5
Got that post-workout bliss and a plate of pizza rolls, so Iām raring to go!
Post Ep: whoever decided the rusted knight ātwistā should step on a lego every five minutes for the rest of their lives
Wait why is Ruby running? The last episode ended with the caterpillar being dropped through the floor by the cat, so are they running from the cat? Was the growth yogurt ready, and if so did they grab it ($50 on no)
āIām so glad the four of you are still the four of you.ā Is this excluding Little because they didnāt get hit with the Character Arc tm dust? (Now that I think about it, why didnāt Little have a vision? Did we just not see it or are they immune somehow?)
āYouāre the one who ditched us in the first placeā okay, Weiss, firstly Ruby stopped following the cat so thatās mostly on her. Secondly, why are you being antagonistic to the one creature you canāt afford to offend because itās the one creature who can get you to the tree?
ā...someone return to the Ever After.ā How can you return to a place youāre already in? Is there a reprogramming center or something? If you veer too far off from your role you get reset? Reminds me of the re-educators of the Dragon Age Qun
Theyāre really laying on thick the whole āEverything is what it isnāt, and what it is, it wouldnāt beā (shout out to that one Shinedown song from the live action Alice in Wonderland)
All this talk of what happened to the caterpillar just sounds like a shitty mishmash of the Ship of Theseus, Schrodingerās cat, and a reset button
So the Red King underwent the Ever Again program (Iām just gonna call it that, roll with it) and came out a kid? Was that by design or does everyone basically get reborn? Does that mean the racoon hasnāt been Agained since Alyx?
Oh they call it Ascension? How Devil May Cry of you. Also I aināt calling it that. I like my Agained verbage
āNose hair from a leprechaun.ā I am half expecting a Rocket Racoon bit here
Straight up ditching someone you know is acting off because ~ew nose hair~ is... something else. And there goes Blake trailing after Yangās coattails again because we! need! that! bee! bait!
This cat is far too lenient with these assholes. They just straight up jumped on his head without asking because who needs to respect peopleās autonomy amiright fellas?
Goddammit bring the cat back right now I canāt stand Littleās voice and cOmEdY
Okay all the lights going out one by one is hella creepy gg
āI thought this was lost forEVERā why does Ruby sound like a highschool girl complaining about drama this deadass made me burst out laughing Also, is that the same sword from the Red Kingdom or a different one?
Okay the android is cool as shit I will admit that. The chain as hair is absolutely fantastic
Was that Summer in the axe blade? An axe is not what I would have expected of a Ruby clone. Those are hard-hitting and slow, usually used by the tanks, while Summer and Rubyās figures suggest more agile approaches. If it were more of a hatchet size, I could see that, especially as a dual-wield
Pocket dimension blacksmith shop? Sign me the fuck up please
I think Iām going to strangle Weiss. You literally just saw her standing in the middle of the road, staring at and talking to nobody, and you fucking whine? I hope someone stabs her with her own tiara jfc
āIt contains a motherās promiseā BITCH WHEN WAS THIS ESTABLISHED AND WHY WAS THAT THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OF TO GIVE AWAY IāM GONNA BURN A FIRE HYDRANT
āWe do not ascendā oh you mean die? That thing you said didnāt happen here? Dying? Was there even a second reading of the script or did yall just smoke with the originals?
Yes Ruby go right past the hostile creature instead of literally any other direction. Yall deserve whatever hell you make
Why is Ruby carrying everyone constantly? Their legs aint broke girl. Go be a distraction while they go for the yogurt goddamn
The giant jackrabbitās cool ngl
Like how one scoop only grew them to doll sized but whatever was left after it was splattered grew them all to the right size
The jackrabbitās name is Juniper. Both cute and cringe
GODDAMMIT IT HAD TO BE JAUNE
WHY
HE FELL LAST
THAT SHOULDVE BEEN YANG
FUCK YOU CRWBY
#rwde#god we all knew this was coming but goddammit why did it happen#there is absolutely no damn reason why the v last one should be there for years when everyone else had minutes#'hur bur dur magic dimension' stuff it up your ass#the magic is called authors pet and its arcane focus is the narrative#jaune is a fucking black hole of a character#i hope he dies#i hope we all die#god they spent so much fucking time on the logistics of the ceremony that barely anything happened#again#if that shit dont come up later i'm stealing smth outta their house#thats probs gonna be how they de age jaune#also what did neo do to the og jabber? did she fucking eat it? is she animorphing things now? wtf#p much the only thing i actually liked was the blacksmith. make the show abt that guy rn forever kthxbye
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tired of yāall spreading misinformation about drugs and addiction bro you canāt get addicted to weed. you CAN get addicted to getting zonked out your gourd, though why tf do you think people go from weed to crack?? cause getting high is easier that way. but also you can get high from WHIPPED CREAM so i guess whipped fucking cream is an addictive substance right?!?!!! my fuckinh godddd
DO NOT DERAIL I AM NOT A DOCTOR IM JUSY A NEURODIVERGENT BITCH WITH A SPINTEREST ON PSYCHOLOGY/NEUROLOGY AND ITS 5 AM
#if you fact check me do it nicely im tired and dumb as hell#iām just tired of people stigmatizing weed more than it is#never even used that shit but i defend her with my life#also the post i saw was like ābodily dependence and addiction are two different thingsā which like it yeah you can be dependent on something#without it being an addiction but addictions are 100% bodily dependence because your brain is in your body fun fact#nic addicts when they havenāt had it for 2 hours: FUCK IM GOING TO DIE IF I DO NOT EAT CIGS RN#like cmon bro#rant#ramble
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feel like absolute shit and everything is so difficult rn and I hate that for us
#all of us collectively but specifically anyone who cant do what they need to do rn because of their health#i have so much shit that needs to get done and so many people i promised to help with things#and all i can do is lay around and cough and be in pain and try to stay hydrated and eat soup#i cant do like any of the relatively simple tasks ive been putting off because i get too tired or my brain cant do it right now#and i cant take any meds for it because they all interact with my regular meds#and i just kind of want to die about it#and my voice being lower from t makes me sound like a freak dying animal when i get hysterical crying about the uncontrollable coughing#which is NOT helpful when i feel extra like an unlovable freak because of transitioning in the middle of how the world is about trans ppl rn#just want to not feel like shit anymore#is that really so much to ask
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at this rate i jgitj as wlel fuckjg have. Dark Lunch [advanced dinner].
#pk;m electrochemistryš“#i am going tomake a sandwich and then a pb sandwich#we cannot eat more chicken fried rice lest encyco#*lest encyclo goes kill die mode at me#nor can we eat pizzer rolls bc they're the Wrong Kind#the who fucks the make SUPRERME PEZZA ROL. the fuck?#bad. tastes like BAD i tells ya. fuckin. blue sour. blue raspberry ass. only in colour though#......... am i losing words rn the fuck was that shit?
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This bitch got grounded š
#its so confusing too#like i was at dinner with my family#asked everyone if we were done eating and if we could leave because i felt sick and my dad got mad and went on a rant and took my phone#away at the end#not really sure why because i was nauseous and focused on that and less of what he was saying#im still grounded rn...i just snuck on because...im a dumbass#ima go clean and try to get my phone back...#and proably play on my wii because they didnt take that from me#and they left me with a shitty flipphone to call them in case i die and shit..#i got ao3 to work on it...#like a normal person
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Someone tell me how to make me not hate myself and make my family not think Iām a bitch and make me want to see my family or drive back down the coast or stay in strange places or do anything other than kill myself I mean whaaatttt haha what a weird thing to say *stares directly into the camera knowingly*
#and donāt say take your medication#fuck. my moms sitting here like I was under the impression you had this all figured out and Iām like well I was under the impression you#weāre going to fucking sit down with me and help me book a room for the last night of driving bc I canāt book and I have to find somewhere#between like three states that will let me check into a hotel room bc if I get somewhere and they donāt let me stay Iām fucked and have no#where to go or sleep bc I canāt sleep in the car on the way back bc my car is packed to the FUCKING top with my brothers shit fuck fuck fuck#fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck#itās just like being a kid I can hear my family making fun of me for my emotions in the next room over FUCK I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE T#THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS#I think Iām having caffeine nic and med withdrawals at the same time while pmsing#AND WHILE TRYING TO FIGURE OUT A PLAN FOR DRIVING BACK DOWN#I think Iām the biggest bitch on the planet rn#i was listening to father by tfb in the car and thereās a line about something about falling asleep while you drive and I apparently sang iy#with a lot of passion bc my brother said āplease donātā and that was literally the first time anyone has called me on my recent musicchoices#but it really has all been like I need to go anywhere but where I am right now and I need to die far away and thatās it#no more starting over no more self hatred no more family shit I just need to stop#I want to hire someone to drive my brothers shit down to Florida and then I want to kill myself in New England#Anyways. Iām gonna go try to eat something and take my meds and then move stuff around in the car and also try to get a room somewhere by#the end of my trip and I donāt have much time at all and I need to kill everyone and then myself now now now now now now now now now now now#every time I move my body the entire world spins and idk if itās anxiety or med withdrawals or being tired or what but I am losing it and I#feel like I donāt have it in me to drive any fucking more this trip and the way back is only just beginning#and in less than hour were supposed to check out of this hotel and go to my aunts for a big family celebration of my brothers graduation and#Motherās Day and Iām going to see all my family who still has a fucking father and I want to be fucking dead I hate all of this I hate it#I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it
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