#ease. like ik they have issues and its nit easy for them but god. theyre so impressive. it makes me annoyed when they try to make me seem
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i rlly wish i was someone that liked cooking more. i rlly never have like. a back log of food that ive pre prepared that i can have whenever. whenever i cook i make small batch and if i make more it usually goes bad and i just wish i was more organized and ate out less. bc id save money also itd be easier to eat when im hungry rather than wait and figure out what i can make with what i do have and i rlly need to go shopping but money is limited also its 6am and i woke up bc my mom was loud getting my dog up for a walk and now i cannt go back to bed bc im hungry and :(((
#its cold.... all i have is... some eggs but also my egg making dkills are. laughable. non existent#i can cook but rlly. not that well. my speciality is spicing up premade food and making it good but homecooked. mostly from scratch kinda#meals ... i have like 4 dishes i can make well but when ive exhausted all of those dishes i rlly dont have much else i can do#and i want to make more food and get better but thats expensive (bc im rlly not a great cook so i mess up a lot so its painful to waste t#that food bc when i mess up i mess up BAD) and its time consuming and i have no time and its like a long r#process of getting better and i get dejected easily and hhhh. i rlly swore i was good at cooking back when i was in ms and hs. i swear ive#gotten worse. and its sooo sad bc i rlly liked to play it up like i was soooo good at domestic things and school and other stuff like i was#soooo talented and all rounded to make up for. a lot. but rlly im just average in a lot of things. which isnt bad!! but#its kinda. idk how to put it. sombering to realize at times l. esp when u rlly used to think you were above average#but average rlly isnt bad! i just have issues i need to sort thru. and ik i cant be good at everything but i want to#and its 6 am. im hungey and tired so obviously.... nit in my best state of mind#but god. it makes me think abt my friends that are living here alone with no family even like... remotely nearby. just making it work with#ease. like ik they have issues and its nit easy for them but god. theyre so impressive. it makes me annoyed when they try to make me seem#so put together like. no bestie. me having 2 jobs plus school and knowing the barest basics of a bunch of languages barely is nit nearly as#impressive as u all. living in the us alone. woth english as ur 2nd or 3rd language. going to school full time and working too. like....#yall are the impressive ones. what i do is the bare minimum#🐌.txt#idk its all just.. an act. and im rlly hungry
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