#each blue line is a quote i heard just in daily life that stuck me as a poem

[priceprime]

Everyone's got blood

And everyone's got a childhood

The writing is on the wall

And it's finger painted.

I met a girl once that told me

The hands are connected to the heart,

But mine were always unsteady

And I didn't want to admit that she was right.

My fingers smell like fruitsnacks

Instead of iron like they should.

A promise of something long lost

I could almost swear I taste it.

When I felt like my hands were ready

I scrawled out my old address

Prodigal, it weighs like a collar

Still the road at home is always called boudier

More home than ever

After we've all moved away.

[secretshinigami]

All Noble Things

Author: @kiranatrix For: @resilicns Pairings/Characters: Near and Gevanni Rating/Warnings: Gen, no warnings Prompt: Near reflecting on his relationship with Wammy’s and L’s reputation Author’s notes: In How to Read, it says that Gevanni’s hobby is building ships in a bottle. So I imagined a scene where Near is observing Gevanni, now in the role of Watari, building a special ship. The time period is flexible but I imagined it after the C-Kira case and before the case with Minoru. This is a loose interpretation of your prompt but I hope you enjoy it!

—

“There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you, Gevanni.” Near didn’t look up as he carefully laid out another domino on the floor, perfectly spaced from its neighbor and approximately two centimeters from chaos. Pinched fingers pulled back carefully and twisted around a strand of white hair. “Two things, really.”

Gevanni looked up from his workbench as the long but comfortable silence between them was broken. Since Roger had died and he’d taken on the role of Watari, he was usually the question-asker. Would you like lunch now? Have you heard back about this or that piece of evidence? Did you have another nightmare last night? 

He’d gotten used to it, to Near. To being the bedrock that an island could rest upon. “Two questions?”

No, he was more of a species imported to Near’s world and being gradually altered by the isolation, evolving to fill his niche. But he had no complaints–it was a quiet, stable life and Near paid him well. He didn’t mind the solitude. “You’re exceeding your daily allotment. I’ll have to demand a raise if this keeps up.”

“I believe I gave you a raise just three months ago. If these demands keep up, I’ll have to find another Watari.” Near deadpanned it but his eyes flicked up briefly, and Rester knew he was joking. Another domino clinked against the terrazzo floors, this one with hand-carved scrimshaw detailing a breaching whale.

Gevanni snorted and turned back to the ship in a bottle he was working on. “Good luck finding someone else to source those pajamas with the specific blend of Pima cotton you prefer. I’ve kept that a secret. Iron-clad job security.” He grinned as he carefully reached a long wire into the bottle to pat down blue and white putty mimicking ocean waves. “So, what’s question number one?”

“Can you tie back my hair? It keeps getting in the way.” Near flicked a long strand over his shoulder but it fell again, dangling dangerously close to his creation. “Mind the–”

“Dominos? Yeah, I’m practically a ninja at this point.” Gevanni pushed his loupe glasses to the top of his head before carefully making his way over spiraling lines of set-up dominos to Near at the center. He knelt and pulled a hair-tie from his pocket, holding it between his teeth as he gathered up all the silvery strands. “Holf spill,” he murmured around the band. Near was stone-still as he made a quick and slightly messy ponytail, leaving some loose hair around the face for twirling. “Better?”

“Much. Thank you.” Near very briefly made eye contact as Gevanni went back to his workbench before looking back to his pile of dominos. He sorted through them for another scrimshaw piece. Gevanni had made a special set for him on his last birthday but he always saved them for the end. 

“Mmhm.” Gevanni slid back into his chair and picked up the little ship, a model of a 19th-century whaler. “So what was the second question?” 

“I was curious what you were working on.” Near let a domino tumble across his knuckles, back and forth, back and forth. “You’ve never spent that much time on just one ship before.” He caught the domino with his thumb and placed it next in line. 

“Oh, so you noticed?” Gevanni held up the little whaler on his palm, clearly proud of the highly detailed craftsmanship. All the masts were down and tied with an array of strings that could be pulled up once it was in the bottle to raise them. “I guess this one’s special since it doesn’t really exist. Thought I’d challenge myself. It’s…well, it’s how I imagine the Pequod to look, the whaling ship in–“

“Moby Dick?” Near stared at the miniature vessel, head slightly cocked as he smoothed a loose strand of hair. “The ship Captain Ahab used to chase his white whale.”

Gevanni smiled. “That’s right. It’s one of my favorite books. Have you read it?” 

“Years ago. I remember not liking it very much. The whale killed him in the end.” Near placed the last couple of dominos and let out a long sigh. The moments before flicking the first piece were the ones he both cherished and dreaded. The satisfaction of creation could be drawn out like a  monotone note, but when it was finished, the spectacular destruction was often over too soon. So, he hesitated and stood up instead, padding to Gevanni’s workbench to watch more creation. 

“I bet you’d like the book more these days. Single-minded obsession to defeat a power past human control? Throwing all caution and sense of self-preservation to the wind? The thrill of the chase?” Gevanni arched a brow. “Can’t tell me that doesn’t sound familiar.”

Near frowned slightly and hunched in on himself. “I suppose you mean L. Or do you characterize me as so foolish?”

“You’re L now.” Gevanni disliked that he had to remind Near of that even now, years after the first L had died. “But yes, it reminds me of what Matsuda told us about your predecessor’s obsession with Kira. I never met the first L, but maybe I can understand him, in a way.” He quoted Melville, "All my means are sane, my motive and my object mad.’ You’re L but you’re not him, and I’m glad for it.”

Near wasn’t sure if he was glad for it or not. So many times over the years he’d compared himself to that avatar and wondered if he could measure up. Drily, “I guess that makes me Ishmael." 

"You survived, didn’t you? Lived to tell the tale and learn what he couldn’t." 

Gevanni turned back to the little ship, carefully threading another string through the rear-most mast. He worked quietly for a while, cognizant of Near’s focused attention and feeling sorry for bringing up the Kira case. It wasn’t often that Near took such an interest in his own projects, or perhaps the man was merely thinking about what he’d said. “Sit down, if you want to. I’m about to get to the exciting part.”

Near pulled a chair closer and slinked into it, one leg pulled tight to his chest and the other dangling off the end. “Which is the exciting part? Stuffing it into the bottle?”

“That’s part of it. The thrilling part for me is raising the masts and sails inside the bottle.” Gevanni pointed to the flat masts and the multiple lines of string leading from them. “If anything goes wrong or a string gets tangled…or some bit of glue doesn’t hold, well–”

“You’re screwed.” Near smiled faintly and rested his chin on his knee. “Hours of planning for one moment of glory. Or disaster.” It also sounded familiar, so familiar.

“Exactly.” Gevanni chuckled and looked over at Near, pleased to see that small, rare smile. That in itself was the product of so much patience, of hours spent in understanding and the slow building of confidence and trust. “Once I get the ship in, would you like to raise the sails?”

Near’s eyes widened and he rocked slightly in the chair. That was Gevanni’s moment of glory and he deserved it after so much time and hard work. The inlaid wood, the meticulous paint, the delicately carved and articulated ship’s wheel capped in brass. The hand-sewn sails and gold script that read Pequod on the ship’s side. Each detail was evidence that someone else had built this and he would only be stealing the best part, swooping in for the end of the trick.

“You built it so you should do it.” It didn’t help that he was worried about making a mistake and ruining it at the last moment. How would it even fit? Despite the masts lying flat, it seemed impossible that the ship would make it inside the bottle. “I don’t know how.”

Gevanni sensed Near’s hesitation and uncertainty, recognizing the subtle tics of anxiety. “I can show you. You’re great at stuff like this.” He motioned to the vast lines and towers of dominos filling the room. “Plus, I trust you.” 

When Near didn’t answer, he turned back to the ship, placing a small line of glue at the bottom and oh-so-carefully maneuvering it into the narrow mouth of the glass bottle and onto the ‘waves’ of translucent blue putty. It was a very tight fit and when it stuck down in the right position, he let out a sigh of relief.

“Not bad, huh?” The strings dangled from the bottle’s mouth as he held it up to show Near. “Offer still stands.”

Near wanted to do it, to try. Honestly, he wanted to ask Gevanni to show him how to build one of his own, how to trump the rigid enclosure and build something impossible inside. To raise it up not by magic but by human ingenuity and patience. A creation not to destroy but to keep.

“Alright.” His fingers moved from his hair to tentatively touch the white strings hanging from the bottle’s mouth. “All of them?”

“Just these.” Gevanni pointed out several lines connected to the three masts. “Don’t yank, just pull slowly until you feel resistance and I’ll tape them up.”

“If it works.”

Gevanni laughed quietly. “It’ll work. Stop stalling.”

Near mumbled, “I’m not stalling,” but stalled a moment more before gently tugging the strings. He made a soft noise in the back of his throat when all three masts raised in unison, perfectly aligned and straight. He smiled as Gevanni secured the strings, then slid off the chair to gaze at the bottle from the side. This floating world, this impossible thing that’s bottled the sea. “I can see why you like these so much.” 

“It passes the time.” Gevanni felt warm inside since it was rare that they connected like this, despite all the time spent in each other’s company. He glued the strings to the ship with a long wire and then cut them, leaving no trace of how it had really been made. Setting it on the bench to dry, he said, “Would you like to have it? I have about a dozen. I mean, if you want it.”

“As a warning against white whales?” Near smirked and climbed back into the chair. He fingered the hem of his specially-ordered Pima cotton pajamas, the exact blend he preferred. “Or for the memory of Ahab?”

“Neither? Or…maybe both.” Gevanni knew that so much had changed for Near when Kira died. Monster or not, that moment of destruction had ultimately felt unsatisfying. He knew Near struggled with assuming the name and reputation of L, a legacy that had become so confused in the mind of a world that would never know two L’s had died and a third now had to make peace with that. It was easier to bottle ships than emotions.

Mildly, “Or maybe just because it’s something we built together.” It was odd, but somehow it would mean a lot to him for Near to have it. “How about it?” 

Near found a loose string at the hem of his pants and yanked it, snapping the thread. He got up and crouched beside the winding, spiraling rows of dominos and pressed a slender finger against the first one. That catalyst set off the reaction, the staccato clack clack clack! that echoed in the high-ceilinged room. It was over in seconds and silence crept in again. 

“I’d like that.”

-End-

[The title comes from a quote in Moby Dick: "A noble craft, but somehow a most melancholy. All noble things are touched with that.” It reminded me of  Gevanni’s rather solitary hobby as well as the occupation of solving cases as L.]

[tar-oh]

Daily Cards: Blue Moon, Full Moon in Pisces, King of Cups, Two of Cups, lyrics from Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks by The National and Dear April by Frank Ocean

I guess there was a lot to say today, since two cards for each fell out!

Wow. I really didn’t think this was going to come up today, but I honestly think this is a love reading. Literally everything about this points towards someone receiving an offer, and it’s most likely love judging by how many watery cards I pulled. Everything seemed to just want to fall out today, and most days I’m worried it’s meant for me, but seeing that I have no love interests (at least ones in a position where they could say something, but honestly this is not about Sara’s issues today lol) I have to assume I’m definitely reading for someone else! 

We’ll start with the tarot, especially since I pulled some more cards to clarify this, but I don’t have them pictured above. The cups suit is the suit that’s all about emotions. The King of Cups is someone who is balanced emotionally. In terms of characters of the tarot deck, he’s probably who most would want in a lover (though, I’m not opposed to the King of Pentacles or the King of Swords personally, but to each their own). At first, I was thinking it had more to do with you finding a way to balance your own emotions, until I flipped over the two of cups. Two of Cups is considered one of those love cards that when people see it, they’re instantly like “Oh, someone wants to give you their cup of love!” In the Rider-Waite deck, it’s a picture of a woman handing a cup to a man who is already holding a cup, so one could read this card as an offering of love. Though, in the deck I used right now, it lacks people, so I’m not going to say that this is why I think you’ll receive an offer. It was the moon cards that definitely sealed the deal for me, but first the clarifiers I pulled: The Chariot reversed and 6 of Cups. 6 of cups is a card that is often interpreted as someone from your past coming back. Though, it could mean a past life (and with 2 of cups, I don’t think I’d be surprised. Also, the moon cards add to this idea too). The Chariot was reversed, and one of the things it can mean when reversed is self-doubt. I see this as going two ways: either you’re doubting that you’re deserving of this offer, or this person coming towards you is not feeling as confident as they’d like about their offer.

For those of you who aren’t looking for a love offer, it could just be a newfound sense of self-worth. Maybe you haven’t been feeling so great about yourself. Or, maybe your emotions have been all over the place. These cards say that you’ll be able to find balance in the emotions, or a way to stop doubting your own self-worth. The moon cards were interesting to me, since all week I’ve been having issues getting any to fall out while I’m shuffling. When I do daily readings, I try not to pull cards. I normally just let things fall out, and sometimes it takes a few times to get one to fall out while shuffling. Today, this didn’t take as many as usual, and two fell out. The Blue Moon card hints that you need to “believe in the impossible”, even going as far as to bring up that quote about Blue Moons, “Once in a blue moon.” It says that you may receive an opportunity that is a once in a life time opportunity (that love offer, perhaps?). This card urges you to believe that things will go in your favor. Full Moon in Pisces is kind of similar, in that the situation is sort of a dreamy one (once in a lifetime), but does point out that Pisces is the last sign in the zodiac, so it brings about endings. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, if anything this just suggests that whatever this offer is, it’s going to change everything. And, the past few days’ readings have really hinted at letting go of things so that you can make room for the new. So, I think it’s kind of interesting that this card fell out and that in the booklet it really makes a point to explain that it can be about endings. Both cards, if inquiring about a person, hint that they’re a soulmate. The Blue Moon card says this person is rare, and Full Moon in Pisces says it’s a soulmate. I’ve heard both six of cups and two of cups be referred to as “soulmate” cards. I think this is extremely interesting, because I have 4 cards here hinting at soulmate connections. You guys, when I first got the first two tarot cards, I got so excited! I really think someone has met someone who may be your soulmate! That is, if you believe in it. If not, this could be someone that you just click with really well. Like you’ve known them forever, even if you’ve only met a few months before. It was so weird that I got excited, because I hadn’t even gotten any other cards yet, but I just had this feeling!

The lyrics are a little less enthusiastic, but still not bad! The lyrics from The National’s Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks goes like this: “All the very best of us string ourselves up for love”. This part of the song always stuck out to me. I don’t listen to it too much (you can tell because I completely forgot to write Geeks on the card lmao). I feel like there’s a few different interpretations for this line. The first being that sometimes we’d do anything for love, even change ourselves. Another being that some of us even feel that love is a be-all, end-all thing. I know this doesn’t sound nice, especially since I just said it seemed like maybe an offer from a soulmate could be coming in. But, I think this is telling you that, you don’t have to change who you are to be loved. Whoever is coming in, loves you for you. It’s so interesting to me that I pulled a song by The National for this too, since, as I’ve stated a few days ago, I’ve got some theories about soulmates and them. It’s almost as if the universe is saying, “Wait, no! Tell us!” But I don’t really want to ramble on some more. I would be freaking out if I’d pulled the the songs I associate soulmates with The National, but I still find this pretty funny.

The other song, Dear April by Frank Ocean is a lovely, soft song. It was put onto streaming services during this past April, amid the pandemic. Though, I guess he’d already had this song written before all of this. Anyway, I’m sure it just made a lot of sense to release it when he did, because it does go eerily well with what was happening at the time. The only reason I even listened to it was this very lyric. I saw it somewhere and it made me feel warm. I don’t know, has a song ever made you feel that way? That’s why there are so many songs by The National in my lyric deck. To me, they’re equivalent with a warm blanket on a cold night! And this song is similar to that feeling I get. The line goes: “But you will make something new and it’ll take you through this.” I feel like it seems to heavily imply a hard situation, but I think this could also be applied to a new relationship.

In terms of who this person could be? That is a little hard for me, since I’m still learning the cards. We can say that they may be from your past with the 6 of cups. The King of Cups has some luscious locks of hair, so maybe this person has hair around that length, or even unnaturally colored hair, like that pretty green color. In terms of cards and their astrological equivalents, we have ALL water cards. I’m leaning more towards Pisces or Cancer, but they could be Scorpios, too. I don’t really like saying these signs as a fact, though. One could be a Pisces, but have several different placements in their chart, so they could show up as any of them. I personally have mostly Libra, Capricorn and Scorpio placements, so really! It can be a mixed bag. Plus, I think people can also embody different energies at different times! in my personal readings, lately, I’ve been coming up as wands, which are equivalent to fire signs, but I have no fire signs in my chart! So, that’s just one example. I think whoever this is, they’re currently super emotional about the whole situation right now. Or, it could just be about you needing to balance your own emotions about something (or someone). The Full Moon in Pisces card suggests mediation. I feel like a broken record at this point, since almost all the cards in that deck suggest it. But I think it just really shows how helpful it can be, especially when trying to figure out your emotions.

Let me know if this resonated and if you do receive an offer!

[thegazettefanfiction]

Home (Aoi)

(Y/n) was awoken by the sound of a baby cooing through the speaker of the baby monitor she placed on her nightstand. Groaning as she fought sleepiness, she sat up to check the time – which was already 8 a.m. – before dragging her feet towards the nursery, where the coo was gradually becoming louder. She slowly opened the door, making sure to not startle the woken guest, and walked towards the wooden cot. As she approached it, the baby, who was laying on a light blue mattress with tiny yellow duck prints, looked up and smiled, to which his mother return one.

“Good morning,” she greeted softly, earning another coo from the infant. “Are you ready for another day?” She reached in to unzip the grey baby blanket, revealing a white onesie with a print of an elephant carrying a peanut with the caption “little peanut” at the bottom. With one hand cradling the back of his neck and another on his bum, she brought the baby up to her chest, letting him rest on her shoulder as she left the room to do his daily care. Once he was taken care of, she placed him inside a hanging baby hammock with his favourite fox plush before going off start her day.

As soon as she stepped out of her room after changing into a new set of clothes, she heard the door unlocked, followed by someone stepping into the apartment and said, “I’m home!”

(Y/n) rushed to the door and hugged the man as she said, “Welcome home.” The couple shared a hug before she pulled away to look at him in the eyes. “How was work?”

“Pretty tiring,” he replied while handing his bag to her, to which she willingly took as he bent down to take off his shoes. “But we managed to complete our ninth album on time. What about you? Have you started a new story?”

(Y/n) shrugged. “Well,” she began. “I’ve been busy taking care of our little prince to even think of a storyline.”

Before the GazettE’s guitarist Aoi met (Y/n), she was a famous author known for her collection of short horror stories “(Book title)”, which became an international bestseller translated into many languages. Many directors approached her for its film adaptation, but despite what everyone told her, obstinate (Y/n) declined every one of those offers. From there, she released one dystopian novel and a fantasy trilogy, both became as popular as her debut work. Despite rejecting multiple film adaptation offers, she was still laughing to the bank thanks to her success.

Now, one would certainly think, “How on earth did a young author with much versatility in her works meet a guitarist from a once small visual kei band that’s now growing internationally?”

It all started when (Y/n) was having a book signing for her novel “(Title)” in Books Kinokuniya Tokyo. Reita, who was a huge fan of her work, heard of the event and wanted to have his copy autographed badly. But with his busy schedule in the way, he felt that there was no way he could attend the event, so he sadly forewent it in the end.

However, his crestfallen expression didn’t escape Aoi, and the latter didn’t like that look. As a friend and a bandmate, he didn’t want something like their work stop the bassist from doing something else. To boot, the latter’s birthday was just around the corner, and the day of the signing was on the same day as their photoshoot for their sixth studio album “Division”, so this was the right opportunity for him to do something for his friend and colleague; whether it was coincidence or not.

It was late at night when the band had finished their photoshoot. Aoi left unnoticed and hopped onto his bike, making his way towards Takashimaya Shibuya where he parked the vehicle outside and went into the building. As he made his way towards the bookstore, he saw the queue was starting to get shorter. The guitarist joined the crowd, making him the last one in the line. When it was his turn, he took out a notebook and flipped to an empty page before handing it to the seemingly tired author.

“Just left work?” she asked with a friendly smile.

“Yeah,” he replied, courteously returning one. “My friend couldn’t make it, so I thought I’d get your signature on his behalf.”

“That’s really nice of you,” she commented before bringing the notebook closer to her. “So what would you like me to write for your friend?”

Aoi took a moment to think before replying, “Maybe wish him a happy birthday?”

With the black Sharpie in her hand, (Y/n) wrote her wish to the man named Reita and then left her signature at the bottom. As he watched her wrote, he couldn’t help but glance at her a few times, taking in her appearance. Although she was tired after spending hours sitting behind the desk and signing probably at least a hundred times, he sorted of found her attractive. Maybe it was her dulcet tone that complemented her, making her sound appealing to him. He could see why she had a lot of male fans going after her, judging by the various comments he saw on her social media.

After getting what he wanted, he thanked her with a bow before going home. He neatly ripped out the page she signed on – being very, very careful not to tear any parts of the paper – and put it in a glass frame. He then placed the picture frame into a small cardboard box and closed it, wrapping the whole thing with a white wrapping paper that had gold “Happy birthday” written all over. He stared at his work triumphantly before going to bed with a smile.

When Reita’s birthday came, Aoi gave him the gift, and the bassist couldn’t stop marvelling at (Y/n)’s beautiful handwriting, to quote the latter. Seeing that he was contented with the gift, Aoi decided to take to Twitter and privately send the author a message to thank her for giving him her signature. Honestly, he didn’t expect her to reply, for he thought that judging by how successful she was, there was no way she was going to see that message. But lo and behold, she did and even replied. From there, they got to know more about each other and eventually went out for a meal, then they started dating for a good five years until he decided to pop the question; the rest was history.

Of course, Reita was jealous that his friend got to marry his celebrity crush, but nevertheless, he gave them their blessing.

“I’m sure you’ll think of something,” assured Aoi, who looked up and ruffled her hair with his free hand. After placing his shoes at the side, he put on a pair of house slippers before going into the apartment. “Now where is our little prince?” As if on cue, the baby cooed from the living room. Aoi went in and saw the hanging hammock gently bouncing up and down. He looked in to see the infant, who was now wearing another white onesie that said “Daddy’s drinking buddy” with a print of a milk bottle in the middle, smiling at him with one hand gripping on the orange fox plush.

“Hello,” greeted the father, earning another coo from the child. “How are you? Have you been good to Mama while I was gone? I hope you haven’t forgotten that I’m Papa.” All the baby could do was coo once more.

“He has been a good boy all this while,” said (Y/n), who returned to the living room after putting his bag in his studio. “He’s been sleeping throughout the night, and only cries when he’s tired or hungry or need a diaper change.”

“Is that so?” responded the man, who reached in to bring the baby to his chest and began swaying gently. “What can I say? He’s our son. Oh, yeah. The guys are planning to come over this Saturday. Is it alright with you, or do you prefer another time?”

“I don’t mind this weekend,” assured (Y/n). “I miss their company. It’s always nice to have them around. I actually enjoy watching them play with (son’s name).”

“Do you remember how awkward Kai was with (son’s name)?” asked Aoi.

His wife chuckled at the memory, saying, “Oh, yes. I remembered that he was so uncertain of how to carry a baby that he didn’t even want to because he was afraid that he’ll drop (son’s name). But we can’t really blame him for that. He is a single child, so I think he had less experience with younger kids. Anyway, I plan to cook breakfast. Would you like some?”

“Yeah,” he replied. “That’ll be nice. Has the little prince eaten?”

“Yes, he has.” was (Y/n)’s reply before going into the kitchen, leaving him to have a father-and-son bonding session in the living room.

Aoi watched his wife’s disappearing figure as he thought about his life up ‘til now. He never thought someone like would ever finally settle down with a wife who stuck by his side through many ups and downs in their relationship, nor did he ever thought of having a son who was just as beautiful. He had a beautiful family, great friends he could happily work with as a band, supportive fans that helped them a lot in their career; he felt like his life was complete.

“I don’t need a lot of things,” he said to his son, who was staring at him with wonder. “As long as I have the people I love in my life, anywhere is home to me.”