#dykes and their mikes idk

[wraithwen]

first impressions ft. my first tav (gwayne) who is definitely not a self insert

[flameswallower]

THE NATO PHONETIC ALPHABET RANKED AS POTENTIAL CHOSEN NAMES FOR TRANS PEOPLE:

First, we're not ranking Zulu. Don't name yourself Zulu unless you have a very specific personal background, and even then it might be kind of weird, like naming yourself "Irish" or something. IDK, I'm not Zulu or of Zulu descent, I don't wanna speculate any more or get into it without feedback from that community.

__

IN REVERSE ORDER FROM WORST TO BEST:

Kilo: Why do you want to be called this? Would you want to be called "Ounce?" Or "Meter?"

Yankee: Seriously???????

Uniform: Terrible name, ugly word.

Alfa, spelled "Alfa:" Reminds me too much of "alfalfa." Looks dorky.

India: I love how it sounds and looks, but it might be kinda Orientalist as a given name in a lot of contexts.

Foxtrot: Eh. Not really weird/funny enough OR cool/good-sounding enough.

Lima: imo there's nothing wrong with a Cool City Name, it doesn't strike me as Off in the same way as naming someone after a country (let alone an ethno-linguistic group). Unfortunately, while Lima isn't the worst candidate, I'm not a huge fan. It sounds a little bit wet or slimy to me. But wait, maybe that's cool, actually? Personally, I would be mildly surprised/confused by a man or masc person named Lima, it feels feminine to me.

Golf: It would be really, really funny to name yourself Golf, but I feel like the joke would eventually wear thin for all but the most committed to the bit.

Papa: Really, really funny AND kinky. Less uncomfortable and in-your-face than "daddy." Might also get old. This feels like either a butch dyke one or an older, bearlike trans man one.

Alpha, spelled "Alpha:" Way better than "Alfa," but could sound a bit manosphere and/or omegaverse fanfiction. On the other hand? Maybe you want people to think about omegaverse fanfiction when they hear or see your name.

Hotel: Personally, I think I'd pick this over Golf. But then, I like hotels and do not like golf, and I like the word hotel more than the word golf.

Quebec: A much more appealing city name, in my opinion. Like, it's ugly, but it's fun-quirky-ugly.

Romeo: Now we enter the real contenders! This is great except for how "Romeo" is also very much something people call each other sarcastically/disparagingly, and isn't really associated with anything besides the Shakespeare play.

Bravo: Fun masc name, reminds me of Johnny Bravo, but that may be a plus for you.

Tango: If you wanna be a dance, pick this over Foxtrot.

Mike: Solid, if a little boring. One of the better generic male names.

Delta: VERY cool-sounding name, esp. for a woman

Charlie: A wonderful name for any gender, especially if you want a name that's very normal without being boring

Juliet: Even better in the "name sounds completely normal but isn't boring" department. Evokes Shakespeare without ONLY being associated with Shakespeare.

Victor: See above, more or less, sub "Frankenstein" for "Shakespeare." Also it's just a common noun with an immediately obvious meaning, which I like.

Sierra: What can I say, I love nature names, I find this one phonetically and visually pleasing too.

Oscar: Easily my favorite of the "normal names!" It means deer-lover and is associated with many different things. Sounds amazing.

Whiskey: Imagine how fucking cool this name would be on the right person. Why, the only thing it would be cooler to name yourself would be something like...

X-Ray: There is not a better, slicker, more attention-grabbing trans person name in the NATO phonetic alphabet. Fuckin' X-Ray. Admit it, you're kind of annoyed that you aren't X-Ray.

[dichromaticdyke]

OK I'm reading your blog like the morning newspaper and I noticed nobody sent you any of the sapphic asks SOOOO .... #10, #12, AND #28 feel free to ignore lol

YEAH NOBODY SENT ME ANY WTF. i was even drunk af when i reblogged that ppl were missing out smh. but ty my beloved dyke mike

10. did you do anything gay as a kid that makes sense when you look back on your childhood?

oh wow yeah. i mean i had an obsession with like every fucking goth girl character in children’s media FHDBDBDB i was not immune to the agenda. Sam from danny phantom, Shego from kim possible, June from atla. i’m stereotypical djdbdbdb. okay but i’m still obsessed i have no interest in watching the live action netflix show but i’d risk it all for her

and the original VA’s VOICE GIDNXNSJFN

12. good sapphic poems/books/authors?

the one i am most obsessed with now is The Priory of the Orange Tree, it’s a high epic fantasy with dragons and religious coverups and a main sapphic couple BUT ALSO there’s background old man yaoi kind of.

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo is also phenomenal, it hits my love for old hollywood but also goes into the struggle of trying to make it back then in a racist, sexist, homophobic environment.

iand ’ll always tell people to read Sappho and Leslie Feinberg…

28. what's a canon sapphic ship you enjoy?

UTENANTHY

revolutionary girl utena is my fave anime of all time and honestly probably my favorite show? idk but it was rlly impactful for me. it’s absurd and surreal but also dark and heavy like you sometimes feel insane watching it but that’s the point. AND LOOK AT THEM

that second gif is from the movie which is kind of a sequel, kind of a reimagining. hard to explain haha.

[jellogram]

We need a female version of fag hag like I'm a sapphic hoe with a boy best friend and I need something snappy to call this mf. Dyke Mike. Idk.

[the-hopeless-haze]

Rebel Rebel (Part 1?)

Pairing: Janis Sarkisian/reader

A/N: okay this has been sitting in my drafts for months and I have no idea if I’m gonna continue this but fuck it???? Sorry for all the people who followed me for Barba lmao (I am continuing that don’t worry) but idk I just figured I may as well post this??? I have more of this written and I know how I wanted it to end but the middle is just not working and that’s why I never posted. But I just listened to Dead Girl Walking and I was reminded how gay I am for Barrett sooooo 😂 here you go? You’re welcome?? I haven’t edited this or looked at it since March so this may be a mess but... yeah

It was eighth grade, nearing the end of the year and you were anxious, unsure of why. Would your friends still be your friends next year? High school was going to be a lot different, you could just tell.

You saw your two best friends, Regina and Janis talking to each other down the hallway, where their lockers were, so you headed down there. Regina was probably inviting Janis to the end of year pool party she’d been planning. It was going to be so great to at least be with all your friends one last time, even if high school might take them away.

As you got within earshot, though, you realized Regina was being anything but nice.

“But are you a lesbian, Janis? I can’t have a lesbian at my pool party,” you hear Regina’s high pitched voice chirp. “You understand that, right?”

“Regina... I—“

“What? So are you?”

“Why are you asking me this? Did I do something?”

“I need to know. Don’t you get it? You not wanting to answer is pretty suspicious.”

“I am a space alien and I have four butts!” Janis yelled and ran down the hallway, leaving Regina to laugh. She makes eye contact with you. “Wow, I dodged a bullet with that, huh?”

“Why did you do that?”

“Don’t you get she doesn’t fit in? I mean, she likes girls, first of all. Second of all... she doesn’t get this stuff. Don’t you want to be popular in high school? I can get you there. We’re on top here. Everyone knows us. But this is child’s play.”

“But that was mean, Regina!” you said, your tone accusatory.

She shrugs her shoulders. “Sometimes you have to be mean to get what you want. And we’re not going to get it with her.”

“But she’s our friend!”

“Was...our friend. Don’t you care that she’s a dyke?”

You sighed, defeated. You wanted to tell her, no, you didn’t care... but you knew she’d stop being friends with you too. And her talk of being popular and being on top of the world... it sounded good.

You had many regrets about this day, and if everyone has a couple turning points in their lives, this was your first.

——

Regina was right, though. She got you everything you had thought you’d always wanted, but you never felt good enough and a lot of the time, you’re miserable. You’re constantly worried about your weight, whether you got enough instagram likes on your 1000th picture with the plastics, as you’d been dubbed, and whether or not you were dating one of the hottest guys at school.

Who would’ve thought the hottest guys were so dumb? You didn’t like any of them, really, and the second they asked to get in your pants, you dropped them like flies. So you’d gotten a rep for being somewhat of a prude, which Regina would sometimes scold you for.

Regina just got meaner as time went on, and sometimes you regretted not turning on her the first day she showed her true colors, when she’d sharpied all over Janis’s locker “SPACE DYKE” and even included it in the burn book she made over the summer once yearbooks came out. Regina would flirt with boys that she thought you or Gretchen liked, just to show you she could have them. Jokes on her, you didn’t like any of them, but you had to pretend or there wouldn’t be any gossip or any of the infighting that Regina seemed to love. It was the beginning of sophomore year now, and it was beyond exhausting.

And oh, the parties that started now! You hated them, just an excuse for everyone to get shitfaced and girls to make dumb decisions that made boys so happy even though everyone was too drunk to really remember them the next day. Regina is hosting one tonight, and here you are, in your skimpy, skin tight blue dress that you had to buy with babysitting money— since there’s no way in hell your mother would buy that for you. A sophomore hosting a party was unheard of, but Regina has a huge house and her parents went on vacation for their anniversary. She’d use whatever she could to her advantage.

All she wanted was to climb that ladder, and she didn’t care who got hurt in the way.

But here you were, dancing with the hockey player you were dating now... or was it football? You didn’t even care. You vaguely remembered his name was Mike and you told him you needed to go to the bathroom. You headed to Regina’s room and locked the door, thankful you got there early enough that there was no one trying to hookup.

You got lost in your phone for a while, and you found Janis’s Instagram profile. It was private, but there was her profile picture. She was so pretty now, not the awkward girl who tried to dye her hair blonde and wear pink just to fit in. She wore dark makeup in the picture and she wasn’t looking at the camera, and it fit her so much better. Even her hair, which she had let just grow out from the blonde she’d dyed it, looked great. You nearly send a follow request and then think better of it.

You remembered having hobbies, painting at Janis’s house until your hands were covered in paint, and you remember laughing so hard you couldn’t breathe.

Sometimes Regina was a good friend. Sometimes she was a great friend. She was there for you when your grandmother died over that first summer without Janis, and she held you while you cried... and you cried a lot. But sometimes she was mean to even you and it was exhausting. You know she cares about you, but you know she’d turn on you, too, if you gave her what she deemed enough reason to.

You can’t remember laughing like you used to in a long time. You can’t remember being passionate about anything for a while, either. The only time was in your classes, really, you loved chemistry but you had to keep it under wraps because if it got out you were too nerdy... well, that’s social suicide.

The thing about being a plastic was that you couldn’t be anything or do anything too extreme. You had to just be a shell of human being, a shell of a hot girl, just to appease everyone. The money you spent, or had your parents spend, on your bleach blonde hair and your makeup and your hot clothes and your nails and your purses and your shoes... and the hours you spent at the salon and the mall with Regina and Gretchen and Karen, it was completely exhausting. And then you weren’t allowed to have a personality outside of all of this, it was just, clothes! Makeup! Shoes! Boys! Parties! Popularity!

All things girls were supposed to care about, but really, there was no girl left in you to care anymore. You slip off your heels and lie down on the bed, remembering Regina holding you. That felt nice, her slender arms around you, her chin against your shoulder, and she smelled so good, like a hair salon and vanilla and cinnamon and... you just wanted to cry. Why couldn’t she be like that all the time?

The pillows smell like her shampoo and you inch up to place your head on them, ready to fall asleep, the bass from the speakers downstairs lulling you.

You awake twenty minutes later with your phone blowing up from Regina. “Where’d you go? Party’s not fun without you 😘” her most recent text said. Your eyes burn from the makeup you fell asleep in and you blink a few times before replying, telling her you were in her room and not feeling well.

“Bummer! I’ll be up in a few xo” she texts back.

You answer the door when she knocks, and you smile when she hugs you immediately. “(Y/n)! I’m sorry you’re sick! Did you drink something Kevin made? Because don’t.”

“No... I just... I don’t know. I’m sick of the parties,” you grumble as you pull away from the hug and sit back on the bed. She follows you, her pink dress clinging to her every curve, riding up a little as she sits down.

“Why?” She laughs. “This is what high school is about! You’ve gotta have fun. You’re only hot once.”

“But this... it’s not fun to me. It’s not fun to get wasted and have guys try and get in my pants and watch girls throw up.”

“But we can get everything we want. It’s what I always told you,” she says, rubbing your back, but her voice is hollow.

“I don’t have everything I want! I don’t even know what I want anymore, but I’m not happy. Are you? What are you getting out of this because I don’t understand.”

“Respect. Love. Fear. It’s all I ever wanted, really,” Regina says. “People either love me or hate me but they think about me. They think about you, too. Everyone who’s a sophomore knows us, and most of the upperclassmen do too. Doesn’t it feel good?”

You sigh. “I guess, sometimes, it does. But most of the time it doesn’t! I don’t like it, feeling like I have to do everything perfectly because everyone’s watching. And it’s only going to get worse because next year we’re juniors...”

“If it makes you feel any better, I’m not entirely happy either. I don’t like Jack.”

“Then why are you dating him?”

“Because. Free popularity and all I gotta do is be seen with him.”

“But... doesn’t he ask for more?”

She laughs. “Sure he does! But you have to be strategic with that.”

“Right..." you say, slightly sarcastically. You didn't really know what she meant.

Regina places a hand on your knee. “I know it’s been hard for you. But it’s going to be okay.”

“Do you wanna... just lie for a minute? I know you have to go back to the party—“

“No, I can stay for you,” she says, smiling softly. There was the Regina you wanted to be friends with all the time.

You both lean back on the bed, and her arms wrap around you tightly, her chin nestling on your shoulder. Here, you were happy.

“It’s all worth it, all the fighting to just get to the top to sit like this with you,” she says quietly. “We could never be made fun of for this because we can’t be touched.”

“What?”

“Don’t you get it? I... I don’t know how to say it. Just... trust me, okay?” You nod, not sure what she meant, but then she’s leaning over and turning your cheek toward her and she’s kissing you.

Regina George is kissing you.

It’s a quick peck, probably because she’s not sure how you’d react but it’s still the best kiss you’d ever had in your life. You don’t make any rational thoughts in the next few moments and you’re not sure if she kisses you again or you pull her back in, but all of a sudden she’s on top of you and kissing you harder, and slowly, the confusion sets in.

It almost feels too good to stop, but eventually your brain starts working again. “Regina... I... are you okay?” you ask as you pull away. “Are you drunk?”

“What? No. I wouldn’t get drunk at my own party, what kind of slut does that? No, (y/n)... I want you. Didn’t that feel good?”

“Yes... but... you kicked Janis out of the friend group for being a lesbian. Why would you do that if you were gay? You always said she had a crush on you. Why would that have been such a bad thing?”

Regina sighs and flops over to the other side of the bed. “I’m not gay. I mean. I don’t know. I definitely didn’t know back then but I knew Janis just didn’t fit in even if we took away all of the gay stuff. But if we talk about the gay stuff... then yeah. I was confused. Super confused. I didn’t know if I liked you or her and I knew I wasn’t supposed to like either of you. And then I saw the two of you together and you just... you had something I didn’t have, just genuine friendship, and maybe she had a crush on you. Either way I was jealous. And I had to get the two of you apart.”

“Regina... that’s awful,” you say.

“But then I tried to be nice to you! I just wanted to be friends. I mean, I didn’t think I wanted to sleep with you or anything. I just wanted to be friends. Karen and Gretchen are just stupid and I just don’t feel comfortable enough around them to be like this. To let go of the persona.”

“You haven’t been entirely nice to me, Regina. Plus you started this off by ruining my friendship with Janis.”

“I know. I shouldn’t have done that, but I was so... angry whenever she was around. I just... we could pass for straight. No one would know.”

“Regina... I can’t,” you say, biting your lip and trying not to cry.

“Do you... do you not like girls? Is that it? I’m so stupid,” she says bitterly.

“No, Regina, it’s not that, I mean... I don’t know if I do. But it’s just... I’m tired of living like this and I don’t want to have this secret to worry about. All we need is for Gretchen to find out...”

“But she wouldn’t. And even if she did, do you think she’d cross me? Cross us?” She grips your wrists. “Please.”

You start crying and you know you’re not going to be able to stop. If the circumstances were different, you’d love to date her. You think. “Regina. I don’t want to be popular anymore, and for that to happen, we can’t be friends and we... can’t do this.”

“But—“

“If you want to drop it... then... if you want to give up being popular, being fake... then... then yes. Come out. Apologize to Janis. But I’m leaving, and I’m not leaving with baggage.”

She nods. “I... I understand. It’s okay. But I need this! They’d tear me apart if I came out and I can’t be... I can’t be outcasted. I’m exhausted, too, you know? But it’s... it’s better than the alternative. I hope you don’t come to realize that.”

“Regina...”

“No, it’s fine. I really get it,” she says, smiling. “But I’m going to have to spread a rumor, something so they don’t question why you left the group.”

“I know. Just say I’m gay. It’s your trick.”

She starts crying then, sobbing, really, and your heart lurches. You lean over to hug her.

“You don’t have to be so mean.”

“Yeah. I do. Because if I’m not it’ll turn around on me. My mom... she’d never understand! I just... okay. I understand we can’t... be seen together if this is really what you want. But can you at least text me once in a while? So I know how you’re doing?”

“Of course,” you say. You hug her one last time, and she kisses your cheek. You leave the house with your head held high but your heart sinks as you realize this is the last time you’ll step foot in there.

——

Regina is meaner without you. She is hostile to Gretchen and Karen, and you can tell if they adored her at all before, that’s completely gone and they follow her out of fear that she’d make their lives a living hell.

Maybe it’s because she did go on and start the rumor you were a lesbian. Fair enough. You weren’t entirely sure about that label yet but it gave you enough freedom to maneuver this without having lame guys hit on you anymore. That may have stopped anyway since you weren’t competing with Regina for hottest in the sophomore class... but at least it stopped.

“So... looks like she did the same thing to you after all, bitch,” a female voice says as you slam your locker shut. You jump and look to your left to see Janis there... and your breath catches. She was all the more beautiful in person.

“Yeah,” you frown. “But hey... are you mad at me?”

Janis scoffs. “Kinda. But I know you weren’t to blame now. I mean, she did the same thing to you! And I hate Regina more than I could ever hate anybody. Also Damien made me talk to you.”

“Damien?” you ask. “Wait... that guy in musical theater?”

“Yes...” Janis says slowly. “How do you know?”

“He’s really good! I’ve gone and seen every play. Like, and sat in the back. But I’ve gone.”

“Wow. That surprises me. But you did used to love that sort of thing in middle school.”

“I think I made you listen to the Mamma Mia soundtrack at least 80 times.”

“Oh yes. Wait... did you know that they’re putting it on this year? It's the spring musical."

“What?”

“Yeah. Maybe you could audition now that the plastics aren’t holding you back. You have like one day to make up your mind though. I do scenery. Maybe I’ll see you around?”

“Where do you sit at lunch?”

——

It was an awkward reintroduction and the words are never spoken. Is Janis gay? More importantly, are you gay, or bi, or something? Does wondering if another girl is gay make you gay?

But aside from the utter confusion of possibly having a crush on your ex best friend, you’re enjoying life as an ex-plastic. You’re auditioning for the role of Donna, but even if you don’t get it you’re going to get a part since so few people actually signed up to audition. You’re drawing again, too, even if you were never as good as Janis.

Regina hasn’t texted you yet, but you’re thankful. If she did too soon you’d get pulled back from the progress you’ve made. But you’re also worried about her, and your heart lurches whenever you make eye contact with her at lunch and she looks away quickly.

But this was how life was going to be from now on, so it was time to get used to it.

[tendaberry]

If just considering mike love’s position in The Beach Boys, like....he’s not entirely a shithead ...like I like his vocals sometimes, and his stage presence (even tho I think it’s insanely goofy at times) and early lyrics helped make The Beach Boys popular...to say he singlehandedly destroyed smile is really inaccurate—Brian had intense pressure put on him from the music press (beach boys were voted best band over the Beatles in England in like 66/67!), good vibrations did insanely well...I think Brian was always kind of afraid of how his weirder compositions would be perceived by the group as a whole—I think this was the case with pet sounds and definitely smile

Brian’s also a people pleaser and then working with your family on top of that would be insanely difficult...people say he should’ve went solo in 66—maybe easier said than done, but like he probably didn’t even consider doing smth like that, wasn’t on the radar bc 1. theyre his brothers, cousin, high school friend (and Bruce😌) 2. Like he had specific needs for their voices individually

I think the thing with mike is that....he just has a really strong personality it seems while Brian is comparatively more passive (just gathering from what I’ve read about them)...this can be seen with mike antagonistcally questioning van dyke parks’ lyrics and then Brian CALLING van dyke down to the studio to explain himself, just making a tense situation even moreso...*does* suck tho that Dennis was so supportive of Brian (you can hear it in the smile sessions, he’s like “sit down everyone, Brian’s going to play us this wonderful feel”😭...I really think Dennis’ first songs with the group are heavily Brian-inspired 😭😭😭) and like idk the others couldn’t get behind that feeling ...but imagineee your band’s sound does a complete 180 overnight, would be hard to process, especially with what Brian was doing.....but mike does come off as a major asshole with his “acid alliteration” stuff, and that obviously doesn’t add anything good to the group dynamic...the younger wilson bros unforch may have not felt it their place to step in and “set mike straight” or whatever ....idk what was up with al, I think he had some mild protests, not sure....Bruce apparently LOVES everything Brian does lol, but idk what he thought at the time—he did love pet sounds when it was released and promoted it England

Like mike doesn’t deserve ALL the shit he gets but uhhhh some of it is also justifiable (politics....his autobiography is gross I hear 😋)

[robinskalechip]

home - chapter thirteen

robin buckley x reader

a/n: this one’s a tough one, also idk why i keep putting “x reader” even though i’m literally inserting a whole character into stranger things but oh well

warnings: homophobia, death, suicidal themes, language, smoking, drugs, abuse, blood, alcohol

masterlist

not my gif!

this chapter is mainly revolved around sofia

chapter thirteen - your love terrifies me

sofia was laying on the couch, eyes closed, completely unaware of the physical constructs around her

robin felt concerned “how exactly does this work”

mike turned to her “basically el will be able to see some of her most emotionally draining events from her life and then the last one is supposed to be her current biggest fear”

eleven was sat in front of the television with her blindfold on, concentrating

everyone around watched in anticipation

robin was internally acknowledging how sweet sofia was. she knew she didn’t talk about her past but the fact that she was about to make herself vulnerable for the sake of el made her feel warm.

the tv began to trip out as it rapidly switched from channel to channel on its own until stopping. on the screen, everyone could see a house its all from el’s point of view as she walks through it all

steve seemed a bit taken back and robin took notice, “that’s her house, well, her old house”

on the screen a car drove up, it was sofia’s car

a young sofia exited the car, dufflebag in hand. she was wearing a hawkins high track uniform and a varsity jacket.

the sixteen year old sofia walked into her home as el quickly followed behind

a man and a woman sat on a couch together, looking at the girl angrily

the man spoke “che diavolo c'è di sbagliato con te”

everyone was confused except robin. steve turned to her and asked what he said.

“he asked her what was wrong with her”

the man continued as the woman next to him looked at her feet, “jarod chiamato. mi ha raccontato di te e di maria”

robin translated, “he got a call from a guy named jarod and he told him about sofia and some girl named maria”

steve helped her understand “maria was her best friend, she went to boarding school a little after sofia left”

sofia looked scared “wait wait it’s not what you think-“

the man got up and walked towards the young sofia and slapped her across the face, making her head turn. el could see her face, her face now red and her eyes watering as the man began to push her towards the door, the woman getting up and following behind

he pushed sofia down the few steps of the front porch, leaving her on the grassed area with her dufflebag now on the ground as she began to cry and begged “per favore, lasciami spiegare”

robin was getting teary eyed “she wants to explain”

the man grabbed a bag from the house and threw it to sofia “tua mamma ti ha fatto una valigia”

“her mom packed her a bag”

the woman slowly peaked around the man to look at sofia as she cried out “mamma, per favore” barely able to get out the words as she was so choked up on her tears

the man and the woman closed the door and el approached it but when she entered out of the other side, it wasnt the living room she had just been in, it was a night club.

music was booming from all areas of the room a gay club yall

el turned slightly to see sofia approaching the door she had just gone out of in a tee shirt and jeans and the same dufflebag she had previously.

as she got someone near her to light her cigarette, she walked out of the door as el began to follow her down the new york night time street.

a group of three men walked past sofia to then look up at the building she had just exited

“HEY”

another man began to shout “HEY DYKE”

sofia turned around to see the same man screaming at her “you work here?”

they were all clearly intoxicated so she turned back and went on with her night before she felt a hard mass hit her head.

the men began to beat her as she fell to the ground. they did not quit until police sirens could be heard and they ran off

el ran to the girl as she saw blood coming from her mouth and a large cut on her head

robin looked at the cut on her forehead, remember the scare she noticed on her while she slept

paramedics arrived at the scene and gently took sofia

el looked up to see a woman in a large coat watching the whole scene unravel while smoking a cigarette before redirecting her attention to the now shut doors of the ambulance

she went and opened the doors to then find herself in a hospital

the woman she had previously seen watching the scene was entering the building to then approach the front desk and be directed to room 504

el followed the woman to then which hear their conversation

“can i help you?”

“my name is natalie illuminous”

sofia chuckled “illuminous? what kind of last name is that?”

“the kind that can save you from all of the shit and piss you have to deal with on the daily”

sofia adjusted herself to where she was sitting up straighter as she asked “pardon?”

“i’m a mother of a house. every week i take myself and my children to balls and we showcase our beauty in order to obtain trophies. in exchange i provide shelter, food, water, and everything else you’ll ever need”

sofia looked at her confused, “and that applies to me how?”

“i’ve seen you. more than on one occasion. you live in your car, you work for lauren at the club, you’re known for your beautiful smile and you’re somehow always so nice to everyone you meet” the woman stepped closer “i’m going to go pay the bills for all of this, while you think about whether you want to be living in a large apartment that you get to live in for just walking a few minutes...or if you want to stay living out of your car for the rest of your life”

the woman walked out, leaving sofia in a confused gaze. she was almost convinved she was drugged.

robin turned to the unconscious sofia on the sofa and saw a slight smile on her face.

el followed the woman as she exited the hospital room and found herself in a large hall that looked like a ballroom she had once seen in a movie.

sofia was seen walking around with a man around her age on her shoulder as they laughed amongst themselves.

as they walked out of the door el had just came from, the man started to feel nauseous and collapsed to the concrete pavement to which sofia dropped with him to see if he was okay.

another woman followed and asked what was wrong, causing sofia to scream to her “GO GET NATALIE”

sofia turned the man over and started examining his face that was sweating “are you using again?”

he weakly shook his head no

sofia thought about anything else it could possibly be and her mind only went to one place, the place that had taken so many of her friends

“shit when was the last time you were tested?”

no answer

el jumped as the door swung open and a very dressed up natalie approached the two

“what happened”

“i don’t know he just collapsed. he said he wasn’t using but i-“

her voice was shaking

“i don’t know when he was tested last”

natalie looked worried and so did sofia as natalie went to the payphone and called for an ambulance

once the ambulance arrived and the boy was lifted inside, sofia followed, as did el. however once she entered the ambulance doors, she found herself in a hospital waiting room where she could see sofia on one of the chairs with her head down and her hands on her head.

el went to touch the girl’s hand when she moved her head up and el could see her face clearly. she was crying. nay, not crying. sobbing. el could tell she could barely breathe.

the woman el remembered as natalie came towards them with a sympathetic look on her face as she bent down in front of sofia.

“it’s okay darling. it’s okay to cry. i’m right here”

el felt herself about to cry as she backed away from the scene and through a set of push doors to be met with the inside of a large apartment. she was standing in a long and narrow hallway as she heard the sound of keys jiggling.

in entered sofia as she laughed her way past el, even though el followed her anyways, and down to the end of the hallway as she yelled “hEY NAT I FOUND THAT JACKET YOUVE BEEN LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR, IT WAS IN THE TRUNK-“

she was cut off when she felt her stomach turn inside out as she saw natalie holding her own stomach in a pool of her own blood sweat and tears.

“what happened- i-“

“shhh it’s okay” natalie raised her hand, although she was weak, and brushed away sofia’s tear

she was practically whispering “i was in the wrong place at the wrong time while coming home” she took a breath “but what’s done is done”

sofia frantically looked at the woman, examining her “no no no no no not you.”

she held natalie’s hand, “anyone but you”

natalie continued to hold sofia’s face in her one hand, even though blood was now being transferred to her cheek, “non piangere per me do not cry for me”

el started to walk through the doorway before she was met with another club scene within the literal blink of her eye.

within a few seconds, people parted and el caught a glimpse of sofia who was now sitting on a couch, drink in hand, laughing

el began making her way towards her, still eyeing her movements and actions

sofia took a joint from another girl and took a hit, blowing the smoke in the air as she leaned her head back and get up to yell “BENNY SAID HE’S GOT SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR US UP STAIRS”

el hurriedly followed the group of four upstairs to see a man waiting for them, smoking a cigar

sofia walked towards a table where a white powdery substance awaited her, “oh shit benny” she grabbed the metal straw and took in a line of it to then rub her nose before getting up and letting the others have a go

a girl started to laugh “imagine if nat saw us now, that old whore would be shitting in her pants, especially seeing sof so shit faced”

sofia turned around, wiping her nose and sarcastically laughing “ya know what megan-“

sofia pushed her against the wall by her collar “dont talk about her”

one of the boys pulled her way while saying “come on let’s take a walk”

sofia broke free from him before walking back downstairs almost falling “i can go by myself im not five”

the girl she had previously called megan yelled out to her “YOU BETTER BE AT WORK MONDAY”

she was ignored as sofia made her way to the exit of the night scene and out into the street

sofia was out of it. she was feeling everything and nothing all at once. she thought about her life back in hawkins and her life in new york.

she lost both of her mothers

she lost her home

sofia approached a bridge that catered to the view of a gorgeous river

robin was in tears watching everything unravel as she looked to sofia laying on the sofa and spotted a tear fall down her cheek

sofia looked out to the river before getting on the edge and turned around, el being able to clearly see her face as she closed her eyes and tilted her head to the sky and fell

once she hit the water she was awaken to the same bridge but now she was alone and was more conscious than before as el was able to now look at the tv after taking off her blindfold and embracing mike as she cried

will redirected everyone’s attention to the television “wait this is her current fear?”

mike loosened his grip on el “yeah it’s supposed to be”

sofia was standing on the bridge’s edge once as she searched for people, but the streets were empty and she thought she was alone until she turned back to see robin

robin watched in shock, as did everyone else

robin took sofia’s face in her hands as they stared at each other, tears flowing from sofia’s face as she whispered “i’m sorry”

robin whispered back “it’s okay” she kissed her gently

as she released her, once again, sofia fell to the body of water below her

this time as she hit the water, she woke up from the sofa, gasping for air as she looked around, trying to understand her surroundings. it wasn’t until joyce began to hug her that she began to break down into tears as she tried to not look at robin

next chapter

[nancykali]

do you have any headcanons on an au i’m working on wherein jonathan is a lesbian and almost everything stays the same in the show except of course the fact that she and nancy would probably get a little bit more shit for people thinking that they were an item and people were of course Homophobic bc let’s be real this was the 80’s. I just adore the idea of lesbian!jancy finding their way in the world, tackling oppression and kicking monsters’ asses together :D

Argh, you probably already finished your au by this pointand don’t want to hear my hcs, but this is really nice!

I already picked out a name for my female version ofJonathan! Her name is Jordan. I love picturing a Stranger Things AU whereeveryone is female except the villains and father figures, so all the main malecharacters are female (Michaela, Daniela, Lucy, Willa, Jackie Hopper, Jordan,Stephanie), and Barb Holland is Brad instead. Because let’s be real we’ve hadenough of male-dominated shows and the duffers had no business making Hopperand Steve their biggest characters in this show when El and Joyce are thereasons their show is so successful. (Not even getting into the Nancy misogynyand B*lly sexualizing discourse here lol)

Lesbian Jancy is so freakin’ adorable. Because let’s justpicture canon playing out with nothing else changed but Jordan is the outcastgirl with baggy old clothes a decade old (from the thrift store you know, orold ones of Joyce’s) and hair like Allison (the Basketcase) in The BreakfastClub, but that sandy brown Charlie has. And she’s always had a crush on Nancy,ever since kindergarten, and could never bring herself to try being closefriends because Nancy was so prim, beautiful, accomplished, and came from arich family, and while Mike and Will were close, Jordan always saw Nancy withBarb or other prissy well-dressed female friends, and felt like an uglyduckling and interloper.

And that night at Steve’s party, she took pictures withoutreally thinking, just mesmerized by Nancy’s beauty, and when she developed thephotos she had no idea the redhead knew Steve and would tell on her. She’shorrified, knowing they’ll all spread the rumor she’s a gross dyke and Nancywill never speak to her again.

But then they team up and Nancy is lowkey impressed byJordan’s muscles when they’re buying all their supplies for monster hunting.And omg the night in the forest when Jordan saves Nancy from the UpsideDown—and Steve sees them together and thinks Nancy’s a dyke too and thinksshe’s strung him along to humiliate him. And Jordan putting her arm aroundNancy so tentatively and secretly wishing she could always see Nancy in herclothes (Jordan is a bit taller than Nancy and Jordan’s clothes are already bigon her so just imagine them on little Nancy). And then Jordan gets ready tosleep on the floor but Nancy calls her up and Jordan, not wanting to seem likea predatory lesbian, sleeps above Nancy’s comforter. Jordan sleeps heavily andNancy always remembers how Jordan reached out to her in her sleep. Nancycouldn’t sleep very long that night, and woke up in the small hours withJordan’s slender hands curled against Nancy’s arm, Jordan’s fine hair minglingwith Nancy’s curls on the pillow.

And of course the end of the season has Steve admitting hewas completely wrong about Jordan, and Nancy still kisses her on the cheekafter giving her the camera wrapped in bright paper.

And really idk what your AU entails after s1, but ascribingto my personal AU, Steve kills the mean rumors about Jordan after they fightthe Demogorgon together, and doesn’t give a shit about his loss in popularityfor continuing to date Nancy, ditching Tommy and Carol, and hanging out withJordan, first with Nancy then just them one-on-one. And though Jordan is alesbian, she really begins to like Steve and sees why Nancy loves him. ButNancy begins giving Jordan these tentative hints that she’s attracted to her,but Nancy’s afraid to say it outright. And she’s already talked to Steve aboutbeing bisexual and explained she’s afraid there’s something wrong with her, butof course Steve never believed that and he tells her she’s not messed up forliking girls too, and he’s not jealous if she also likes Jordan.

And so the whole poly thing eventually comes up between thethree of them a few weeks into their friendship, and Jordan is absolutelyfloored and not sure how to respond at first, so Nancy gets really upset (she’sthe one who brought it up, with Steve’s support) and Jordan starts crying toojust because she’s overwhelmed and Steve is like “I have two crying girls in myroom what do I do oh my god”. So he leaves his room for a few minutes to getcigarettes and two glasses of wine because women like wine to relax right? Andhe comes back, cigarette already lit between his lips, to see Nancy’s head onJordan’s shoulder and they’re talking quietly, still both puffy eyed andsniffling. But they’re both grateful for the wine—and Nancy takes a cigarette—andexplain their feelings to Steve and why they were both crying.

And this is probably more than you want, anon, so I’ll justleave it up to anyone’s interpretation what happens after that lol.

[rose-of-pollux]

Ok, so, I said I should make a masterlist of Robert Vaughn roles and whether or not each character survived, so here it is, under the cut--presented in chronological order of release/airdate, here are the roles that @ksturf​ and/or I have seen (will be updated as we see more).

(Obviously, spoilers...)

Hamlet (Hamlet) -- death by poisoned blade

Pharaonic solider (Ten Commandments) -- death by Red Sea re-merge

Idol Worshipper (Ten Commandments) -- death by the wrath of God (yup, two bit parts in this move, and they both got killed off...)

Mr. Beekman (Father Knows Best) -- survives

Bob Ford (Hell’s Crossroads) -- survives

Buddy Root (No Time to Be Young) -- survives

Billy Jack (Zane Gray Theater) -- death by gunshot

Johnny Adler (Zane Gray Theater) -- survives

Kid (Gunsmoke) -- death by gunshot (after literally twenty seconds onscreen)

Andy Bowers (Gunsmoke) -- survives

Frank Elliot (Panic!) -- survives

Symbol Maker’s Son (Teenage Caveman) -- survives

Hank Barlow (Mike Hammer) -- survives

Dr. Dixon (Whirlybirds) -- survives

Don Bigelow (Unwed Mother) -- survives

Marshal Dan Willard (The Rifleman) -- death by gunshot

Eddie Campbell (Good Day for a Hanging) -- death by gunshot

Miguel Roverto (Zorro) -- survives

Lloyd Stover (Bronco) -- survives

Stan Gray (Frontier Doctor) -- survives

Chester Gwynn (The Young Philadelphians) -- survives

George Jones (State Trooper) -- death by execution

Roger Mowbray (Riverboat) -- survives

Art (Alfred Hitchcock Presents) -- death by gunshot

Theodore Roosevelt (Law of the Plainsman) -- survives in the episode, but as he’s playing a historical figure who eventually dies, idk what to count this one as...

Asa Bannister (The Rebel) -- survives

Perry Holcomb (Men into Space) -- survives (just barely)

Lee (The Magnificent Seven) -- death by gunshot I REFUSE TO ACCEPT THIS; YOU CAN’T MAKE ME 😭

Sandy Kayle (Laramie) -- death by gunshot/rock slide combo (I think; it’s been a while since I seen this one)

Dr. Guy Collins (The June Allyson Show) -- survives

Roy Pelham (Wagon Train) -- survives

Roger Bigelow (Wagon Train) -- survives

Dr. Frank Cordell (Thriller) -- death by falling

Billy the Kid (Tales of Wells Fargo) -- survives

Luke Martin (Bonanza) -- survives, but his fate isn’t so good as he’s pretty much promised death by hanging

Earl Rogers (G. E. True) -- survives

Simon Clain (The Virginian) -- I’m 99% sure he survived (it’s been a while)

Jim Darling (The Dick Van Dyke Show) -- survives

Capt. Raymond Rambridge (The Lieutenant) -- survives

Napoleon Solo (The Man from U.N.C.L.E.) -- survives (after 10,000 close calls, but still!!!)

Bill Fenner (The Venetian Affair) -- survives

Walter Chalmers (Bullitt) -- survives

Antonio (If it’s Tuesday, it Must be Belgium) -- survives

Paul Krueger (The Bridge at Remagen) -- death by execution

Casca (Julius Caesar) -- not entirely sure, but seeing as though he is last mentioned by an angry mob out to get him and is never seen after that, I’m going to guess death by angry mob

Ray Whitely (The Statue) -- survives (but his dignity does not)

Neilson (Clay Pigeon) -- death by gunshot

Jerry Hunter (The Woman Hunter) -- death by gunshot or a fall (forget which...)

Harry Rule (The Protectors) -- survives

Parker (The Towering Inferno) -- death by fall

Charles Clay (Columbo) -- death by blunt force trauma

Hayden Danziger (Columbo) -- survives

Proteus IV (Demon Seed) -- survives... in a manner of speaking (he’s a sentient computer who uploads his sentience to a human body as he’s being shut down, so technically, he lives)

Col Rogers (Brass Target) -- death by gunshot (I think?  It’s been a while)

Sebastian Rolande (Hawaii 5-O) -- survives

Hud (Cuba Crossing) -- death by gunshot

Harrison Crawford (City in Fear) -- survives

Barkley (Virus) -- death by genetically modified flu virus (saw that coming a mile and a half away...)

Gelt (Battle Beyond the Stars) -- death by intergalactic battle

David (S.O.B.) -- survives

FDR (FDR: That Man in the White House) -- survives, but, again, he’s playing a historical figure who suffers death by polio...

Ross Webster (Superman III) -- survives

Ed Ryland (Black Moon Rising) -- death by car

Stanley Auerbach (Prince of Bel Air) -- survives (not to be confused with a popular 90s sitcom of a similar name)

Hunt Stockwell (A Team) -- survives

Ray Melton (Nightstick) -- survives

Jerome Huxley (Ray Bradbury Theatre) -- death by strangulation

Schneider (Skeleton Coast) -- death by gunshot

Byron Orlock (Transylvania Twist) -- undead/temporarily dead

Gary Julian (Buried Alive) -- alive but presumed dead

Gideon Armstrong (Murder She Wrote) -- alive

Edwin Chancellor (Murder She Wrote) -- alive

Charles Winthrop (Murder She Wrote) -- alive

Col. Gavron (Tatort) -- death by explosion

Dennis Forbes (Dancing in the Dark) -- alive

The Devil (Witch Academy) -- immortal

Dr. Stewart Rizor (Walker, Texas Ranger) -- death by gunshot

Bill Stratton (Diagnosis Murder) -- death by gunshot

Alexander Drake (Diagnosis Murder) -- death by gunshot

Prof. Michaels (An American Affair) -- alive

Ron Fairfax (The Sender) -- death by gunshot

James Sheffield (The Nanny) -- death by old age (I think?  I didn’t watch the ep where he died so if someone can fill me in on how James died, that’d be helpful)

Carl Anderton (Law & Order) -- survives

Tate Speer (Law & Order SVU) -- survives

Walter Briggs (Law & Order SVU) -- death by old age/illness

Baxter Cain (Baseketball) -- survives (but, again, his dignity does not)

Mr. White (Recess) -- survives

Vince Deal (The Sentinel) -- survives

Judge Travis (The Magnificent Seven Series) -- alive

Benny Palladino (Hoodlum & Son) -- survives

Albert Stroller (Hustle) -- alive but presumed dead/faked his death

Jacob (Excuse Me for Living) -- alive

Silver-Haired Man (The American Side) -- alive

Carmine (Gold Star) -- alive, but outlook not so good 😢

[roseomens]

choose ur fighter, my family edition (all of these r white 😔👎)

father, charles: REPUBLICAN, says slurs, racist. tells me im going 2 hell everytime i get into an argument with him. doesnt believe in evolution??? thinks hes immune to covid bc he had it once, hates doctors xcept when its to make fun of me for being chronically ill, christian, fell into a mlm scheme and is trying to fix my illness with miracle pills i refuse to take, bootlicker. voted trump.

mother, kathleen: democrat leaning centrist, "supports" lgbt people but no <3, against blm, "alm!!1!" supports police, just lets charles call me the f slur :(

oldest child, matthew: idk actually but i think hes a republican. i dont talk 2 him hes 35.

second oldest child, michael: alt right, says slurs, voted trump, says the n word, calls me a libtard, incel, his last girlfriend realized she was bisexual bc of him, calls me a dyke, still supports legalizing weed???

middle child, callie: mod dem, doesnt like the "violence" blm does but supports the movement, doesnt think we should abolish police, doesnt like kill all men :/ "communism doesnt work!1!" thinks i dont know anything bc im older than her, doesnt take care of her own animals, thinks u can b racist against white people and straightphobic..

honorary child, raeliegh (YES FOR REAL): centrist despite being bisexual?? mikes old gf, doesnt support blm or police, doesnt want to abolish police, doesnt use my pronouns or name, has a sugar daddy.. ig... supports me doing things to piss my parents off, buys me food and clothes, chill with me being alt, lets me fight her on politics without calling me slurs

honorary child, ellie: leftist, kill all men, pansexual, forgets 2 use my name and preferred pronouns :/ callies bff, bullies my sister for being straight with me, never shares food with anyone BUT me, bullies republicans, actively debates alt righters, flips off every trump sign she sees

youngest child, marlow: anarcho communist, actively bullies republicans, chad, alt, unironically says poggers :/ nonbinary lesbian, steals trump signs, blm, acab, we live in a fascist police state, has punched a man for calling me a slur, smacks people with my cane, actively debates republicans, makes my teachers and classmates big mad

[helmes-deep]

I find Lexie to be a delight. She's so cute. But some of the secondary characters have no draw. I loathed any episode with Frankie's dad. I get it Jerry Van Dyke is a huge deal. But could he be any more boring. I'd like him more if he spent more time with the boys instead of his man crush on Mike. I miss the aunts. They were a hoot.

I wasn’t really sold on Lexie at the beginning, tbh. Probably because her relationship with Axl escalated too quickly. But yeah, she’s a really sweet, cute, and lovable character!! I’m glad she and Sue are best friends :’33

Lol yeah. I get that he’s a “legend” (same with Frankie’s mom, I think??). But his storylines ultimately don’t really interest me. Frankie’s parents at this point just kind of exist to make her think about something really monumental about life, but there doesn’t seem to be any real pay-off because Frankie herself doesn’t really seem to change by it. The aunts???….. Oh!!!! You’re talking about Frankie’s old aunts!! Yes, yes, yes – I enjoyed watching them as well!! WOWOW was that a callback or what; I forgot those two even existed man, this show is making me feel old haha Yeah, I definitely liked them!! More than Frankie’s parents at that time earlier in the show?? Idk; the show had pretty solid characters and storylines overall back then, imo. But if they were still around now, I’d probably definitely love them more than Frankie’s dad and mom :pp

Another sidenote: you know, I’ve been kind of thinking this lately. Why The Middle kind of sucks and whatnot, due to the severe lack of more interesting, new side-characters. It seems like, at a certain point, we just stopped having interesting characters like Frankie’s old car boss, the Glossners, etc. and then everything just centered around the Heck family – which is great and to some degree, the point – but it kind of stunted everyone’s character development because they weren’t really meeting anyone knew/weird to have interesting or comedic interactions with?? I mean, Mike’s dad, his brother, Nancy, and Brad are all very good minor characters (and are the side-people I enjoy), don’t get me wrong, but they show up so regularly that it can sometimes get boring imo.