#due to how many overlaps autism and ADHD have it can be hard to tell which one a kid has or if they have both

[lunathewafflelord]

I think I might have ADHD. I’ll have to bring it up next time I’m at my therapist.

To anyone who has taken a test for ADHD, what was it like? It’s been a LOOOOOOONG time since my autism diagnosis (like. over a decade) so I don’t remember much about what it was like, and I’m sure the tests are different now than they were then.

Is ADHD testing similar to autism testing? Or is it very different? I’d like to know about what to expect!

[thewalrusespublicist]

Hey, I've loved your insight on John and Paul's relationship after the split. Can I ask you a different question?

Namely, do you think Paul is autistic?

You don't have to answer if you don't like.

Hi Anon!

Sorry I’ve taken so long to respond to this one, I wanted to dedicate some proper time to it as it’s a more complicated one and I wanted to give it the thought it deserves. I’m sort of in the best and worst position to answer this. The best in the fact that I am diagnosed autistic (probably AuDHD but that’s a whole other thing) and present atypically (good eye contact, empathetic, have learnt to read people fairly well etc.) and in a way that many people don’t realise I’m autistic until they know me well or I tell them. However, that almost means I’m in the worst position because the possibility that I’ll potentially project traits onto Paul is much higher than the average person. But I’ll try to be as unbiased as I can.

To properly judge whether Paul is autistic you would of course need a specialist who can assess his behaviour in-depth so all of this is of course speculative. From my own-brand observations and perspective, I think I would be comfortable saying that there is a distinct possibility that Paul is neurodivergent. This could be AuDHD or just straight up ADHD or PTSD (there’s a lot of symptom overlap between the three and childhood ptsd leads to restructures in the brain). This due to the following traits that I’ve noted:

Inability to appropriately assess risk (posing lying half on a diving board over an empty swimming pool anyone?? And so many pictures of him perilously close to edges)

High need for stimulus

Perfectionist yet unable to finish things properly (Paul himself admits there’s albums that are clearly unfinished)

Trouble expressing himself

Constant fidgeting (Ringo said he was unable to keep still)

Hyperfixations that get in the way of other tasks

Intense procrastination despite periods of aforementioned hyperfixation (sorry George Martin no I haven’t done the entire score for a film until the last minute I’ve been hanging with John)

Synthesia

Potential hyper mobility (let’s just climb onto the packing in one step)

Maaaybbbeee potential co-ordination issues (man can’t really dance and when he learnt to ride he started cycling backwards) 

Rejection sensitivity

Rigid thinking 

Insensitivity 

Distracted focus (his dad talking about him watching television and doing his homework at the same time)

Tics and stims

A musical savant 

So there’s quite a bit there tbh when taken all together. That being said without proper assessment it would be impossible to say which of the three he would fall under, if any. Once again though, he shares traits that I recognise in myself and my neurodivergent friends and wouldn’t be at all surprised if he was. 

On that note, I hope you don’t mind me mentioning this anon but I think you’ve asked quite a few people this question on here? I’m guessing (again apologies if this is wrong) that you’re also autistic and relate to Paul in some way that is quite personal to you? I only bring it up as I’ve been there, being autistic is hard and a lonely experience at times and finding decent representation for high functioning autism is near impossible. I would say even if Paul is autistic or not, he’s still a great example of how having these traits in no way stops you from being loved, valued and even adored. Paul has lived an incredibly successful life partially because of his traits of neurodivergency, regardless of label that in itself is pretty great to see. So yeah whilst I wouldn’t want to put a label on it, I think he might be in our general camp and I’m really happy to potentially have him here. 

[thechangeling]

Idk if I'm just protecting too much onto Kit or if he's actually audhd coded-

It also could be the trauma idk

No you're right tbh I get it. And it can be difficult to tell what exactly is a sign of what when there are overlaps.

ADHD and PTSD share the symptoms of hyperarousal, hyperactivity, inattention, irritability, restlessness, impulsivity, recklessness, lack of concentration and memory challenges. However, there are also many differences between PTSD and ADHD.

Individuals with ADHD are reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained mental effort, whereas, individuals with PTSD tend to avoid reminders of their past traumas. Therefore, people with ADHD may avoid tasks such as chores, whereas, people with PTSD may avoid certain sounds, things, places or people that remind of their painful experiences.

"Individuals with ADHD are easily distracted by extraneous stimuli when doing tasks that require sustained mental effort. However, individuals with PTSD cannot concentrate due to hyperarousal or zoning out, and are easily startled. Individuals with ADHD may seem not to listen when spoken to directly due to their mind being elsewhere, even in the absence of any obvious distraction. However, individuals with PTSD may look like they are not listening due to feeling zoned out or due to re-experiencing parts of their trauma memories.

Individuals with ADHD can have difficulty organizing tasks and can lose things or be forgetful in daily activities due to executive functioning challenges and concentration difficulties. However, individuals with PTSD can experience the same symptoms due to high anxiety levels or feeling as if they are not in their bodies.

Individuals with PTSD can experience negative cognitions such as “something bad is going to happen”. However, individuals with ADHD can experience hyperactivity without any negative belief. Nevertheless, individuals with ADHD tend to form secondary negative thoughts about themselves, such as “I am not smart ” or “I must be lazy” due to their challenging experiences with the school system, following schedules and keeping organized.

Individuals with PTSD experience sleep challenges as secondary symptoms of restlessness and hyperactivity; whereas, individuals with PTSD experience sleep disturbance due to anxiety and trauma related nightmares.

In social situations, Individuals with hyperactive ADHD may fidget, interrupt or intrude on others and they may have difficulty waiting their turn. They may blurt out things that may be perceived as inappropriate. However, individuals with PTSD are more likely to withdraw from social situations, experience restlessness or have emotional outbursts if feeling uncomfortable around others." - Expressions Counciling

"CPTSD and autism have similar symptoms, but the root cause of these behaviors is different. ASD starts during the process of development of the nervous system and begins very early in life. 

By contrast, CPTSD develops in response to a traumatic situation.

Individuals with CPTSD or ASD can both exhibit a reduced interest in social interactions. For those with CPTSD, this stems from social withdrawal, as the affected person feels afraid of others and finds it hard to trust them. 

Those with ASD simply don’t get as much benefit from social interaction as others do, making it less appealing to them.

Both disorders can also cause difficulties in sharing emotions. Those suffering from CPTSD may avoid sharing their emotions because they don’t trust others or feel intense shame and guilt. 

By contrast, those with ASD have a reduced social communication ability and can’t quite figure out how to tell others about their emotions.

If a child develops CPTSD due to trauma early in life, they could also be misdiagnosed with autism. However, a mental health professional should be able to distinguish these two conditions because they are different." - Health Match

"Generally speaking, people with either condition may struggle with interpersonal relationships, such as those with friends, coworkers, or romantic partners. But for autists specifically, that might be due to difficulties with reading social cues, or non-verbal communication.

With ADHDers, these difficulties are more likely rooted in impulsivity or an inability to focus." - Inflow

So yeah...it's complicated. Might be worth a re-read.

[mcrmadness]

I noticed that I have started to avoid talking about my personality traits that could make others go "just say autism!!!" to me. I often feel that even in Tumblr tags I need to explain myself. Sometimes I describe something I do or think, and then feel like I need to explain that it's e.g. due to my introvertism/ambivertism, and then I start to feel like I need to leave both parts out completely before someone comes to me to tell me that I should just call myself autistic instead.

Like, I'm so tired of everything being symptoms of something I don't have. I'm so tired of not being "allowed" to be who I am without people constantly trying to diagnose me with autism. I know I am neurodivergent, but there is more to that than just autism, and I don't relate to autism things. I relate to ADHD things and many other overlapping ND things, but that's it.

I used to talk call myself "highly sensitive person" before, but I no longer can do that either because so many people started saying that's just autism. And it annoys me, because I still relate to many HSP things, but none of the things I relate to are actual autism traits.

I've also been asked if me being ND affects my aroaceness. I know even psychiatrists think I'm autistic only because I have never been into dating. I don't understand why do they have to ask about that in general? A while back I decided that if I'm ever asked about dating again by a psychiatrist, I will say "It's none of your business." because it is not, and it's aphobic to diagnose aroace person as an autistic just because they don't date other people, and it's really damn rude towards autistics too (I forgot the other word...) to assume that they wouldn't be capable of normal relationships and dating.

Anyhow, I've really come to that point where I feel like I need to stop talking about myself cos I am constantly afraid of random people coming at me because what I describe sounds like their autism to them. It's like 2013 all over again. Back then I drew a small comic about my thoughts when a doctor started to suggest autism again, and I vented into that comic and it ends in a speech bubble that says "why does everything have to be a symptom of something? Just let me be who I am!" because I was really feeling like that just because I don't fit the mold of neurotypical, the doctors were trying so hard to find stuff that would made me fit the autistic mold, but I was not and still am not "autistic enough" to fit that. And it made me feel like I was an object or something. Not enough of this but also not enough of that, and people trying so hard to make me fit into either, when all I wanted was to be left alone since I seemed to be the only person who was not bothered by me floating somewhere in the grey area. The worst really was the feeling of people also trying to kinda change me so that I would finally fit either end, and of course the doctors always wish that they could make NDs "normal" again which, of course, is not even possible.

But yeah. I've probably just been spending too much time online again but I still don't like it how everything has become symptoms of _something instead of some of them being just regular personality traits...

[lasersheith]

I'm not gonna interact because I know I'm technically/logically/whateverly incorrect here but I just saw a post that really pissed me off and I'm gonna vent about it because this is my stupid blog and I do what I want 😂

Cw for smoking references and death caused by smoking

So the post in question was a doctor who prescribes hrt for trans people, which is great, yay, A+. And then they go on for like 4 paragraphs about how horrifically several older trans patients they've had have died due to smoking and how they always tell all of their patients that hrt can already harm your cardiovascular health and smoking makes it so much worse etc etc which is true and all well and good and whatever but like

We fuckin know

And I know this isn't super well studied yet but there definitely appears to be a huge overlap in the population of trans people and people with ADHD and/or autism and I just really wish healthcare professionals would learn what is actually motivating to the au/dhd crowd. For so many of us, being told that something we're doing is super bad and we HAVE to stop or XYZ horrible consequence will happen is inherently unmotivating and most of the time results in triggering some kind of authority opposition response or demand avoidance.

Quitting smoking is hard enough for neurotypical people and neurodivergent people who don't experience demand avoidance or authority opposition, when you add those struggles in, it's near goddamn impossible. It took me like 5 different tries and 3 different medications to finally make it stick for over two years at last count and it was the hardest thing I've ever done. And I had (completely unrelated) brain surgery 9 months ago.

Thankfully the person clarified they don't withhold hrt from patients until they quit smoking, which is really good of them given how hard it is to quit and how much of a self medicating/self soothing behavior nicotine use is. But it still just really rubbed me the wrong way.

I know I'm just yelling about nothing and being overly sensitive because of how hard it was to get hrt and how much I struggled to quit smoking so absolutely no hate to that person, they're out there helping people medically transition which is life saving and wonderful. I'm just always so frustrated by having to try to wrench myself into a neurotypical shape to get what I need and figure things out on my own or have to heavily modify everything because the world isn't designed for people like me. It's just a lot sometimes.

Anyway. Rant over I guess lol

[the-force-awakens]

poe dameron is neurodivergent and that is critical in understanding him as a character. that's why, I think, even people with the best intentions sometimes mischaracterize him or misunderstand his neurodivergent traits (his confidence in his skill - which is a fact he knows is correct - and blunt acknowledgement of it is not, in fact, a show of arrogance and neither is him sharing any amount of knowledge he has) as something else and we wind up with a very shallow fanon interpretation of him at best and an absolutely unforgiving and malicious one at worst.

Poe is absolutely coded as neurodivergent, so are many other Star Wars characters due to the (likely neurotypical) writers inadvertantly writing good autistic representation without even realizing it. Most of the starfighter pilots in the franchise are coded as neurodivergent and if you're watching for it, most of the in-universe criticisms of them are things neurodivergents are derisively told as well (especially with ADHD). But unlike a lot of characters, I'm convinced poe was intentionally played neurodivergent.

Why? Because Oscar Isaac intentionally played the Moon Knight system as autistic. He pitched the idea of them being autistic to Marvel and was allowed the go ahead to incorporate that into the characterization and we see it in each alter — and there's some distinct overlap in mannerisms between them and Poe, in how he plays them (which, speaking as someone who has seen a bit of his filmography, I can say isn't something that happens often, the mk system is probably one of the few roles of his where I've actively thought of Poe while watching him play someone else).

And of course, it wouldn't be the only time that Oscar coded Poe as something would it? Even though Disney ultimately refused to explore Poe/Finn, Oscar's performance undoubtedly codes Poe as a queer man (before any one smarts off in the comments there's a difference between 'coding' and 'baiting', baiting would be the writers acting like there was a chance it might happen, not the actors who were down for it and adding it into their interpretation and portrayal of the characters so it's still there for queer audiences to pick up on and get past censorship).

But one moment that always sticks in my head is the confrontation with Holdo. He's teetering on the edge of an almost-meltdown the second he walks on the bridge (which D'Acy can tell) and he's nearly calmed down with the reminder of Leia until he sees that the plan is to effectively abandon ship with nowhere to run (as far as he or anyone else at this time, knows).

There's so many moments that just....call forth that Poe is not at all neurotypical that it's hard to pin down any series of beats and go "that's autism", it's in every movement and decision he makes, it's in the way he carries himself, in how he's confident but never arrogant and absolutely sincere in knowing what he's capable of. It's his dislike of being forced to emote, it's his snark and reliance on routines and preference of being in control of a situation or having some idea of what's going to happen, his habit of repeating what other people say (that's an echolalia), it's in the facial expressions he makes.

Then it's teeters over into a meltdown. He kicks over a crate (away from everyone else by the way) and makes his point. It's an extremely self contained meltdown (somehow? But like I can sometimes rein mine in a little too), but it is very much an autistic meltdown in my point of view and I've been firm in this belief since rewatching in 2020.

And then, low and behold, we see Oscar play characters having autistic meltdowns repeatedly in Moon Knight (seriously can uhhhhh the system get a nap? Can they?). Just in the first two episodes alone, they have at least four.

But specifically, I'm thinking of Marc's in the courtyard. He yells in frustration over the plan going to shit and then when Steven unintentionally triggers his trauma, he kicks the mirror repeatedly until it breaks, takes a deep breath and backs off.

Which surely.....can't be almost exactly be what happens in tlj, can it? By Talos...

But yeah. They both have meltdowns in a similar manner but at opposite ends of the spectrum (...the pun isn't intended but hey), and Oscar does the same deep breath and step back at the end of it as both Poe and Marc.

There's a lot of other overlap too, of course, but I haven't gotten so far as to be able to articulate it nearly as well, and it hasn't been on my mind quite as long as this parallel has been. I think a gifset paralleling the two scenes would do much better job of illustrating this but I do not have the energy to make any gifs recently.

[thevirgodoll]

I am a black women and I feel like I may be autistic but I do not wanna fall into the act of self diagnosing yet I also don’t trust a therapist to tell me that. What do I do or are there confirmations to assure something is happening within myself that may be autism?

You should feel validated to know that women are highly overlooked in comparison to men when it comes to the diagnosis of autism. The beginning of this journey, as even explained on TikToks, is honestly self diagnosis and going from there. A lot of cases, too, diagnosis is inaccessible due to lack of insurance or benefits. Self diagnosing in this instance is trying to find answers and bettering your way of living in some way. So you have to do what works for you. This video is my shared opinion on it.

A lot of women, due to the anecdotal evidence of what it is like being on the spectrum (rather than the neurotypical, ableist version) are now realizing that they share these traits due to viral videos or memes. This is not an isolated incident on your behalf, again, a lot of women are literally having this breakthrough.

As far as confirmations, it varies. Refer to this post and see what it means to you.

Refer to this video.

Refer to this photo here:

It is called a spectrum because not everyone has the same symptoms or severity of symptoms. Contrary to popular belief, there is no “look” for autism.

Women are more likely to hide or “mask” their symptoms, and therefore look like “normal” individuals. Women, especially women of color, are dismissed when it comes to a professional diagnosis because of the implicit bias. Even more importantly, women are taught to be ladylike and approachable so it’s harder for a professional to outright say you are on the spectrum as a child due to this societal issue. Acting neurotypical (“normal”) is hard, and arguably if you’ve been doing it since childhood, as an adult your issues will come to a head.

On the other hand, someone can have autism and be completely disabled and unable to speak. This is not the representation for everyone.

It’s very possible you can maintain eye contact, communicate verbally, and keep up conversation. Being autistic, you can learn a “script” of what people expect you to say.

Autism varies. It’s an outdated belief that someone has to be autistic “enough” ...

Finding these answers through videos or communities is how many people come to realize this themselves and learn there’s nothing wrong with them, similarly for ADHD as well, and then they go on to get diagnosis.

The medical community has been known to be inherently insensitive, racist, sexist, and ableist when it comes to ASD. Some also say they don’t believe in ADHD which overlaps. So it’s normal for people to self diagnose or feel apprehensive. Not all doctors are like this, but a lot of them are. It’s up to you to decide how you’re going to move forward with a professional or not.

As someone studying psychology, I know there are professionals who live in the current decade and don’t see autism as a curse. They are willing to help you. They see it as a part of who people are and seek to validate it and give their client or patient tools to succeed. The culture demonizing neurodivergence has been bred by ableist parents and organizations such as Autism Speaks. Avoid using them as resources in your discovery journey. This will further fuel whatever internalized ableism that you may already have.

You are worthy and incredibly capable of success. Live in your truth unapologetically.

You may perceive differently, live differently, but remember the world is built on neurotypical tips and a neurotypical mentality. There’s nothing wrong with seeing the grey areas mostly instead of black and white. There’s nothing wrong with being autistic because it is a part of you, there’s nothing wrong with being who you are.

Intelligent, sensitive, oversharer, hyperaware, who cares what people think about that! If everyone knew the truth about neurodivergence and how they stifle all of us, they’d perceive everything differently and stop subconsciously promoting toxic positivity and insensitive behavior that makes everyone hesitant to seek resources in the first place!

If you need anything, don’t be afraid to ask!

[adultingautistic]

I was the one who asked if there's a way to tell if you experience sensory sensitivities or if what you experience is just neurotypical.

So for one, a couple days ago, my step-mom's friend's daughter was here. She's 9-years-old and my brother was "jokingly" scaring her and she would keep screaming at the very top of her lungs and I kept plugging my ears because it hurt. My brother made fun of me and said I was being "stupid" for doing that. To this day, I can't comprehend how her screaming didn't hurt his ears. It got to a point where even after she stopped for a while, it felt like my ears were ringing even though they weren't.

Ever since I was younger, I always told people "I have sensitive hearing" but I only told that to people because I don't like loud noises unless I can control it (music). I don't actually know if it's true that my hearing is sensitive or not, but I notice when I'm the only person plugging my ears, it makes me question. If I can avoid loud noises, I always make the choice to do so. When our dogs are barking and yowling a lot, I get irritated and I can't stand it. At school, I always avoided pep assemblies if I could because I always told people my hearing was too sensitive to deal with it. But at the same time, I don't know if I've experienced sensory overload caused by anything other than emotional sensory information, if that makes sense...

I get meltdowns and shutdowns, but I always associated them with stressful emotional moments, but I can't tell if other sensory input like sound or visuals also added to it.

There are textures I hate, like crayons, so through my entire life I have never used crayons if I was given a choice. Certain papers bother me a lot, but I've learned to deal with them. I notice when I'm the only person wearing a coat in cold weather. Textures bother me to a point where I'm glad I have to wear gloves at work because every time I touch something gross, dirty, or something that bothers me, I always end up washing my hands.

But at the same time, I can "deal" with these things ?

I experience same-fooding and I have ADHD and I experience SO many autism symptoms, but it's so hard to know if I am autistic because I have so much trauma and my ADHD is so bad and so is my depression and anxiety that I can't tell if certain things I experience are due to trauma, ADHD, or it actually is autism, but I can say that I watched a video about one person's experience with their autism and I cried because I related so much and my autistic friend says that it believes I might be autistic as well.

Original ask date: September 16th

Hi there!  Thank you so much for putting in the work to describe your sensory experiences more in detail, so I can give you a better answer.

So upon reading this, no, this is not a neurotypical experience.  You observed how neurotypicals respond- they don’t cover their ears.  They don’t wear their coat.  They touch the crayons and they don’t care about the type of paper.  

All of these experiences you listed are sensory sensitivity, to a T.  The fact that you are able to “deal” with it isn’t what makes you neurotypical- a neurotypical person doesn’t have to deal with it, because for them, there is nothing to be dealt with.  So having to deal with it means there is something there that you’re dealing with- and that thing is sensory sensitivity.

Sensory sensitivity is one of the symptoms that overlaps between ADHD and autism.  So it is entirely possible that your sensory-sensitive experiences are caused by your ADHD.

From this scientific study on children with ADHD:

One type of sensory processing problem is sensory over-responsivity or sensory hypersensitivity. That is, individuals respond to sensory stimuli in the way that is faster, longer, or more intense than what is expected. This response can be towards any types of sensory stimuli. Sensory over-responsivity can be considered as an independent diagnosis. For example, a child with tactile sensitivity or defensiveness might be defensive for hair-brushing and/or haircuts because she/he cannot tolerate it easily.

This sounds to me exactly like what you are experiencing.

It makes perfect sense that you would relate to autism experiences in this way, because sensory sensitivity and meltdowns are a very common symptom of autism, and it is one we share with ADHD.  

But at the same time, I don't know if I've experienced sensory overload caused by anything other than emotional sensory information, if that makes sense... That makes total sense, and my question is...what else do you think causes sensory overload?  Emotional sensory information IS sensory overload.  That’s the cause of it.  There are two things that contribute to overload in a brain: emotionally distress, and too much sensory input (such as touching Bad Textures or hearing Bad Sounds, etc.) This is exactly what overload is.

I get meltdowns and shutdowns, but I always associated them with stressful emotional moments, but I can't tell if other sensory input like sound or visuals also added to it. The answer is yes.  Emotional distress and sensory distress compound each other.  This means if you are emotionally upset, your ability to process sensory input is reduced.  Or if you are experiencing sensory distress, then your ability to handle emotions is reduced.  They are both things that “fill the overload tank” in your brain, and a person can get overloaded from either Too Much emotions OR Too Much sensory input OR a combo of both.

None of these experiences are neurotypical.  Both are things experienced by people with ADHD and people with autism.  Both ADHD and autism have a lot in common, and so people with one very often relate to the experiences of people with the other.

You also may have autism as well.  It is very common for people who have one to also have the other.  So if you feel you might have autism too, it can’t hurt to go and get tested for it.  If there are some symptoms you experience that ADHD doesn’t explain, that is an indication you may have autism as well.  But you are most certainly neurodiverse, and it makes perfect sense that you would related to autistic experiences regarding sensory experiences and meltdowns, because those are not neurotypical experiences at all.

[katsukari]

hello!! I saw the s/o with adhd post and wanted to know if I could request an s/o with autism for aizawa, mic, yagi, and taishiro? I know there's a lot of overlap but it is a little different and I'm lowkey desperate!! Feel free to ignore me if you want!!

Hi there! I know this took a real hot minute to come out but I’m not gonna ignore you!  Representation matters! I am gonna do some looking, but if something isn’t quite right in how a symptom presents itself please let me know! I would love to learn more! With that being said, my personal experience with autism is limited, but I’m gonna give this my best shot!

How would Aizawa, Hizashi, Yagi, and Taishiro react to having a s/o with autism?

Eraserhead/ Aizawa Shouta

I’m going to preface this with saying that I think that all of them are going to be very caring and supportive. 

I think he may struggle a bit when it comes to your confusion and struggle to understand things like sarcasm and reading emotions. Just because he’s a very sarcastic person and what he says and what he means and how he looks don’t always match up.

 It’s not to say he doesn’t try to explain or be more straightforward with you so its not so confusing, but it takes some getting used to is all.

He’s very respectful of your things that you have placed just so, in such an intricate manner, and does everything in his power to leave them be as not to upset you. Always makes sure to double check and see if you’re okay with him grabbing something for that’s personal. 

If you’re someone who has a strict schedule that they follow, again he may struggle with it due to the nature of his work, but he does his best to do what he can with you so you aren’t alone if you’re okay with it. Tries really hard to normalize his schedule so that it becomes a normal thing for you, something that doesn’t change so much.

When something overwhelms your senses like too many noises or a strong smell that sets your stomach churning he gives you space once you’ve laid down in the dark of the bedroom. Tries to have a mild dinner ready for you when you get up and encourages you to drink some water.

It’s a learning process for him, but he’s committed to you and so he’s going to do everything in his power to help you take care of yourself.

Present Mic/ Hizashi Yamata

He’s gonna have to constantly remind himself to keep it down a few notches when he’s around you, because he knows that loud sounds and big gestures can be a lot for you to handle.

But he tries. God he tries. And he’s very much a partner who is open with you and wants you to tell him if there is anything he can do to help you stay calm and happy. 

I feel like he’s a pretty spontaneous guy who likes to do a lot of different things, so if you have a set category of activities that you enjoy and that’s it, he may try to get you to branch out at first without fully understanding the situation.

Once he knows why, he’s all for, and completely enthusiastic about doing what interests you. Enjoys your passions and when you can tell him everything there is to know about something.

He will however do his best to help you from getting lost in yourself and your fixations for days on end without taking care of yourself. Will always have a meal and something for you to drink ready, and will gently remind you to shower or go out with him for a walk or to the shops. Does his best to do it in a way that won’t upset you.

 He appreciates any and all effort you put into the relationship and if you try and do things he likes, but he’ll never force you to do something that makes you feel unwell.

All Might/Toshinori Yagi

Does his best to help you in conversations, taking time to explain things to you when you need it, or just giving you time to process completely what’s going on. He’s very patient with you in everything so it’s no surprise.

He enjoys your eccentrics they can sometimes match his own, though he knows that sometimes it may mean that you aren’t feeling well, so he makes sure to check in with you often.  Wants to make sure you’re okay.

He knows all about being clumsy, so when you stumble over your own feet and are constantly bumping into things he’s right there with you, maybe even doing the same thing. Will always have an extra bandage or ice pack ready just incase.

There are times he wishes you were more interested in doing things together, like multiplayer games or activities, but he understands that you need your time and space. 

When emotions get too much he’s going to be right there to give you what you need. Space? You got it. A hug? For sure. Time, or an explanation, or just someone to listen as you work through it on your own? He’s  your guy. He’s a great natural listener, so he’ll be there for you whenever you need him!

Overall he will do his best by you, and will make sure to make you fell loved and appreciated and heard.

Fatgum/ Taishiro Toyomitsu

Is going to be there for you no matter what. Good days, bad days, days when any emotion is too much, or there is just too much going on around you. He’s there. He’s steady.

Gives you space when sights and sounds are too much and you just need to sit in the dark with your head under the pillow. Knows that it’s nothing personal, but that you genuinely struggle to process things. 

Will like Yagi, take the time to explain whatever you need to you, and give you all the time you need to think about and process things. Wants to make sure that you are as much a part of the conversation as anyone else.

Doesn’t really mind when you go on and on about your favorite things. He likes to hear about what makes you happy and what interests you. Again, like with the others, his only concern is for your well being, so he just wants to make sure when you fall into a fixation that you take care of yourself.

Sometimes will struggle when your tone doesn’t match up with what you’re saying, but he’s patient and will make sure to ask first before jumping to any conclusions about what you meant. 

He loves you no matter what and so long as you’re happy and healthy so is he.

[swampgallows]

twitter and tumblr et al are all so self-congratulatory for ‘having conversations’ about mental illness and neurodiversity and trauma but it all seems like it’s only for the sake of self-diagnosis instead of recovery. which like obviously im not the first person to bring up the anti-recovery mindset on social media (and i sure better not be the last) but like im not really fuckin interested in how many of my eight billion idiosyncrasies are actually ‘symptoms’ of ptsd or anxiety or adhd or whatever the fuck. i wanna know what you expect people to fuckin do about it. what’s the step AFTER diagnosis? just being able to reblog/retweet Posts and go “OMG this is SO me”???? a diagnosis is not just an answer, but meant to be a new step. ‘i have this, so now how to do i manage it?’ 

i recently watched a lecture from a pediatrician about how severe the overlap is between ptsd symptoms and adhd symptoms, how the two are comorbid, how they are exacerbated and/or misdiagnosed in children of color, and how, ultimately, the two can be so similar in their behavioral symptoms to the point of being indistinguishable. which is why dr. brown later suggests that it is more important than ever to begin screening for trauma in childhood, as well as screening for adhd more for girls and children of color. why? because the root cause affects the treatment. e.g. hyperactivity due to trauma (hypervigilance) is not physically manifested in the same way as with autism or adhd even though behaviorally it is quite similar. therefore medication administered to patients for hyperactivity from adhd can have a drastically negative affect on patients with ptsd, even though they are meant to treat the same issue. it is in treatment that diagnosis matters most, not just the merit of diagnosis in and of itself.

a diagnosis itself is not a treatment. getting a diagnosis (or self-dxing) just to make zero alterations to your life or behavior and instead rest on the laurels of “having an answer” (or excuse!) is not treatment. it is your first step to treatment. this is also why diagnoses can change or sometimes, as our understanding of treatment and science and psychology grows and develops, they can be eliminated entirely (see: all subsets of schizophrenia pre-DSM5, “ADD”, etc.). 

mostly im just fuckin mad seeing these posts over and over or hearing from my peers about trauma but nobody can seem to tell me a single fucking thing i can do about it, including my therapist (who offered oh-so-helpful suggestions like “picture yourself as someone doing something other than what youre doing right now, just believe it's possible” [direct from my therapy notes]). if i hadnt done my own research to discover treatments like EMDR or even fringe controversial experimental shit like mdma and ketamine therapy and had to rely on social networks and shit therapists, id be stuck in a goddamn loop of meditation and yoga and pity party posting online. it’s just so fucking frustrating that this information is so hard to find and that trying to recover, even among peers who are also suffering from the same thing, feels like a solitary burden. it is very annoying when people say ‘you’re not alone’, but they only mean in diagnosis and not in recovery.

i keep trying to tell my therapists that i am done discovering “why” i have trauma. i understand acutely that i have it, and i want to know how to move on and grow from it. but all they keep telling me over and over is to just sit with my feelings, or imagine myself being different than how i am now, offering no tangible way for me to bridge that gap. things like red flags for avoiding the trappings of abusive relationships, or recognizing ‘green flags’ for healthy relationships, or figuring out how to establish proper emotional boundaries (and why boundaries are necessary, and that having boundaries is not selfish or greedy) are all things i learned on my own from my own research. i have had to be my own advocate through everything and it is FUCKING EXHAUSTING. throughout three different therapists i have taught them more about what i am going through than they taught me. and so it becomes very hard to trust in these people when they still believe shit studies from 20 years ago like “ecstasy puts holes in your brain and you can become permanently psychotic after doing it JUST ONCE!!111″  i know humans arent perfect but jesus fucking christ. 

[thesaltyace]

big rant/ramble below, you can safely ignore and move on to the next post in your feed.

Urgh

I shared the results of that autism screener with a quasi-friend who I thought would be "safe" (we used to work together and we connected over his being gay and me being visibly queer) but his response was blergh

Everyone has hints of autism.

okay yeah but this isn't just *hints* of autism. I'm answered yes to symptoms I've had since I was a kid that I've learned to mask or work around as an adult. But I still struggle with them.

He pointed out that he sees me as more ADHD than ASD.

Yeah, fair, and I'd need to see a professional to try to distinguish if my symptoms are ADHD, ASD, or both.

You don't hit the three prongs needed for a diagnosis.

But.... but I do. And the stuff I dealt with as a kid is still stuff I deal with today. I just mask it better. A short and not exhaustive list:

As I kid I had trouble interacting with peers. I didn't have friends, really. I didn't know how to make friends and I didn't try terribly hard to. I acquire friends when someone else "adopts" me and decides that we are friends. And once I became an adult, I have almost never had friends of my own - I share a friend group with my spouse who we're primary connected to through him. I'm okay with that. Maintaining a friendship entirely on my own power sounds impossible and exhausting.

I was okay with not having friends, I liked being alone, but my mom insisted on me being social. She made me join things so that I would have a list of people to invite to parties. I'd honestly have preferred a day of doing stuff I like or just a couple friends. As an adult, I want to be alone on my birthday. I will celebrate with certain friends, separately, usually over a quiet meal. That's it.

I had trouble understanding sarcasm and figurative speech. Like, I understand it now but I still think most figurative speech is annoying. I've been told the way I deliver sarcasm is weird, too.

I liked memorizing movies and quoting them start to finish, I thought it was fun but everyone else thought it was weird. I continued to do this into adulthood but I only quote aloud when I'm alone. Alamo Drafthouse quote-alongs are the BEST. I don't do this with every movie, either, just ones I really like.

Okay actually I also liked to listen to the same album or, in some cases, the same song over and over until I was sick of it (and sometimes even after that point). I mean, just endlessly looping on repeat. Not interspersed with other songs. I do this as an adult a LOT because it's easier with headphones to do this without annoying everyone else around you. Like, often it's fine for me to just put a playlist on shuffle, but I get into Moods where I just want the one album/song over and over. Yesterday I listened to Wellerman about 50 times in a row and only stopped because I had to get up and do something else and that song wasn't "good" for whatever I got up to do.

My special interest as a kid was cats. Literally everything cats, all the time - I sought out obscure facts and could tell you the difference between similar species, and wanted cats involved in literally everything I did. Adults laughed it off as childhood obsession. I was also pretty obsessed with the solar system. I thought asking my peers, as a trivia question, which of Jupiter's moons had its own asteroid (Io, in case you were wondering) was appropriate and interesting and was confused that they didn't know that. That was in fifth grade.

I watched the weather channel for fun. I would watch it for hours and absorb the weekly forecast info just... for fun? I never used it, could never tell you if you should dress a certain way or bring an umbrella or whatever. Everyone thought it was weird.

I was a know-it-all and literally could not stop myself from bluntly correcting people who were wrong. Didn't know or care that it was "rude". I'm still that way but I've learned how to sometimes swallow the urge long enough to find a more tactful way to point it out (but often fail).

I could read on my own before kindergarten, used vocabulary beyond what one would expect for my age, and had a special interest in spelling and grammar throughout my school years. I did not understand how other people weren't interested in learning about it and getting it right. I read at an undergrad level by 4th grade.

I hated loud noises and often covered my ears to block out irritating sounds. I could also hear high pitched noises that even other kids didn't seem to hear (or at least weren't bothered by them). Too much noise sent me into an internal meltdown, I'd just kinda shut down because I couldn't deal with it.

Textures and pressure on my skin bothered the absolute fuck out of me - sock seams, certain fabric materials, socks that weren't equally elastic, one shoe tighter than the other, tags.... all of that. (Also, fun anecdote I just unlocked - when I was 4 or 5 my grandmother started letting me use the soft silk sleep shirt she had as a young woman because I preferred it to anything else. Soft, smooth, no irritating qualities. Bliss. I wanted to wear it all the time.)

Don't get me started on food. Until I was in COLLEGE I mostly subsisted on pasta with either butter or alfredo sauce and chicken. I would eat other things, but pasta and/or chicken was (and still is) my biggest safe/comfort food. I'd eat other stuff mostly if I could control the balance of ingredients, get it made plain, or could confirm the texture wouldn't be offensive (so, like... plain burgers, plain cheese pizza, grilled cheese, mashed potatoes, etc.) I cannot stress this enough - from childhood through COLLEGE I did this. As a kid my mom had to make me a completely separate dish most nights to get me to eat something. My spouse was horrified at what little variety I ate. The only reason I eat so much variety now is that he knows what I do/don't like and tells me in advance if I'll find a texture or taste offensive. Of course, rather than wanting consistent texture like I did when I was younger, I now seek as much texture as possible (so long as they aren't Bad textures) so.... that's fun. But yeah most of my objections to Yucky foods is due to T E X T U R E. Even if I like the taste, the texture overrides it all.

I prefer animals to people. I will seek out animals and interact with them instead of people in the same room. And will pointedly focus on the animal to avoid interacting with people.

I'm perfectly happy with only myself for company. Being with just my spouse counts as me being "alone" though. Always has. I just realized last night that it's because I do minimal to no masking around him because he's a safe person to unmask with and always has been. Never batted an eye at the weird shit I do beyond asking questions about what I was doing or why. And then just "Okay."

Okay honestly just the fact that I want to vent into the void of tumblr instead of actually discussing this with a person - even my spouse! - pretty effectively shows how little it occurs to me to interact with other people directly. o_0

And there are so many more things that I won't list here because I could just go on and on. And like, sure, some of this may certainly overlap with ADHD but my point is that I have enough to point to ASD that it doesn't feel like having a "hint" of autism. And who knows - maybe it is mostly just ADHD and CPTSD stuff interacting in weird ways. Could be!

But just because I can make small talk and make eye contact and do the "normal" shit and I can interact "normally" doesn't mean I LIKE it. I had to LEARN to do those things to avoid having bad social interactions. When I'm by myself or with my spouse, I behave very differently than I do around anyone else. ANYONE. It's not just slightly changing my behavior depending on who I'm with - it's completely suppressing how I naturally would do things if left to my own devices.

Like, the things we recommended to our autistic students who wanted to know how to interact in ways that would help them blend in/be accepted by others ARE THE EXACT THINGS I ALREADY DO. Like, it did not occur to me at the time that neurotypicals literally do not have to think about doing those things. I thought, ah, these students just need to be told what the tricks are. Other people figure these tricks out on their own. It did not occur to me that other people, in fact, do not learn these tricks because they naturally do that behavior. They do not have to actively think about learning the trick, period. I literally thought other people also have to think as hard as I do about interactions. Evidently not.

So yeah, I'm feeling a little upset about the reaction I got from him because I'm like.... honestly, a diagnosis of ASD wouldn't change a lot about how I do things or think of things. But it would make me feel better about interacting with and participating in autism-related stuff if I am actually autistic. I realize I can use the resources and supports meant for ASD regardless, and for formal supports anything I can access due to my ADHD diagnosis likely covers anything I'd need for ASD. But having a diagnosis opens up more community. Right now I'm like yeah I'm ADHD but I totally relate to this ASD content. But I'm not going to interact much because I feel like I don't have the right to join in since idk if I do have ASD.

idk I have a lot of feelings. I had a bad email about the trans insurance coverage thing yesterday and I'm not in a great headspace, but finding out me and my spouse both scored very high on the autism screening stuff was honestly a high point because we ended up sharing a lot of how we view and interact with the world that was very eye-opening about why we interact the way we do, how we relate to others (and how other people think we're weird for how we relate to others), and just...everything. And having someone be skeptical after I've spent a lot of time trying to convince myself that I DON'T have ASD only to conclude that at the very least, I should probably be evaluated because I can't reasonably rule it out. Like, most people do not wonder if they have autism. The fact that I am spending this much time looking into it and trying to find examples to disprove it only to find I overwhelmingly can't in virtually every single diagnostic category.... just..... dismissing it outright is kinda hurtful.

Like, I recognize that ADHD symptoms overlap a fair bit, but seriously. My spouse (who definitively does not have ADHD) scored almost identically to me and we vibed on almost everything when we compared answers. We see most things similarly. We have similar areas of confusion about other people and for fundamentally similar reasons. I can't imagine all of the stuff that points to ASD for me is just ADHD in disguise, not when I vibe THAT HARD with someone else. Spouse does not vibe with me on ADHD content. At all. He can appreciate it since he does live with me, after all, and observes whatever's being discussed. But he doesn't vibe with it. He vibes with autism content, though. And I vibe with both.

idk this rant ended in rambling and I'm just going to go listen to Inside on repeat for a couple hours while I try to calm down a bit. o_0

[scatterpatter]

hey um you know the differences between ADD and ADHD? what are the similarities? How do I know systems (didn't use the right word here sorry) of ADD when I have it or research of it?

The word you're looking for is symptoms!

Let me start off by saying I am NOT a psychologist whatsoever, NOT an expert on ADHD, and I could be misinformed on some of these, so please add onto this post with corrections if I made a mistake!

From what I previously understood, ADD was the same as ADHD, just those with ADD don't experience hyperactivity like those with ADHD do. However! Doing a bit of research to answer this, it appears that ADD isn't a term used anymore? It seems you fall under three main "types" of ADHD

Inattentive type: You have trouble concentrating, processing, etc (I believe this is what used to be considered ADD)

Hyperactive-Impulsive type: You get spells of sudden hyperness/energy and impulsive thoughts/actions

Combination type: when you have both inattentive and hyperactive-impulsive types

(Source)

So it's quite possible you have the innatentive type but not the hyper-impulsive type or vice versa. You could also have both!

It's also worth noting that ADHD and Autism heavily overlap with symptoms, so you may want to look into symptoms of Autism as well!(though it's possible to have both!)

Here are some symptoms to look out for in figuring out if you might have ADHD:

The stereotype of "Dialogue dialogue dia- OOO PRETTY BUTTERFLY- anyways what was I saying?". It's usually on a way less dramatic scale, but finding your mind often wandering and getting distracted from tasks/conversations/etc(inattentive type)

The stereotype of "HAHAHA SUGAR RUSH" again, usually on a way less dramatic scale. Feelings of sudden hyperness or bursts of energy that make you feel extremely giddy for seeming no reason(hyperactive type)

Experiencing "hyperfixations", which is when your brain "fixates" on a topic(you'll usually see me talking about my fixations on certain video games or other medias). When you're fixated on something, you're often thinking about it most of the time and find it difficult to focus on things other than your fixation(I believe both types experience this but correct me if wrong)

"Stimming", when someone stimulates themself, usually through physical means. Fidget spinners were a meme for a while, but many folks with ADHD actually use them! There are many other ways of stimming too: hand flapping(though sadly many people with ADHD and/or Autism get bullied for this), tapping on things, clicking pens, bouncing the leg, dancing/jumping in place, chewing on things, repeating words/sounds, so on and so forth. Many people have many different ways that they stim(inatenntive types often use fidget toys to help focus, hyperactive types often use toys or stims to get out their sudden bursts of energy)

Executive Dysfunction- where completing even simple tasks feels like an ordeal, even if it's a task you WANT to do(so NOT the same as procrastination). It often feels like some invisible barrier between you and the task, and I once saw it described as "you sit there and think about doing the task instead of doing it and the task never gets done"(I believe both types experience this)

General forgetfullness- doing assignments, remembering plans with friends, paying bills, remembering where you left things around the house. For some reason you often forget these.(inattentive type)

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria- when you take a small rejection or neutral response and your brain blows it out of proportion and makes you think the person hates you(I believe both types experience this)

Trouble understanding social cues- often not being able to tell if someone is annoyed, sarcastic, etc until it's "too late". In my case I called myself "dense", usually if people flirted with me because I didn't pick up the cues they were putting down. Also avoiding eye contact can be a neurodivegent thing(both types experience this I believe)

"Time blindness". Having a hard time figuring out how much time has passed or how much time you have until a deadline. Usually we experience time as "in the past", "now", and "in the future" and have a hard time quantifying that time. Something that happened yesterday could feel like 3 weeks ago. Projects sneak up because they're shoved into "in the future" until suddenly they're due. I combat this by wearing a watch at all times and compulsively checking the time (Inattentive type)

Overstimulation. When very loud sounds or very bright lights feel painful to you while it doesn't seem to bother others. Being unable to wear certain clothes because the texture feels "wrong", etc(both types)

Feeling like your brain is "wired differently". Because people with neurodivergent minds- our brains ARE wired differently! Usually people figure this out by how they count or do math, by how they interact with others, by how they tackle large tasks, etc(both types of course)

Now, of COURSE you don't need to have every symptom to be ADHD, especially if you're not the combined type. I just named a few of the major ones, feel free to correct me on any or add some if I missed some major symptoms!

Taking online tests such as this one can help guide you along whether or not you're showing many symptoms and if you're likely to have ADHD or not(DOES NOT COUNT AS AN OFFICIAL DIAGNOSIS THOUGH)

Of course, the best thing you can do is talk to a doctor! That's the only way you can be officially diagnosed. Also, with a diagnosis, you may be able to be treated to help with your everyday life(meds, school accommodations, etc) Plus a doctor knows more about this than I do, so they'd help you the most!

Hope this helps!

[dyspfanblog]

Post #133 – Could Yui from K-ON! have Dyspraxia?

Welcoming Yui!

Yui from K-On! is the newest addition to my on-going ‘potential dyspraxic character’ project. It’s been a while since I’ve done a potential dyspraxic analysis, although not from a lack of content, just Yui zoomed straight to the top of the list. For starters, Yui is a character I consider to be a strong contender for the potential dyspraxic title. Then there’s the point that I finished ‘K-On!’ fairly recently so felt I should get my thoughts out while it’s still in my head! Plus I wanted to do something light because these recent months have been tough, both personally and globally. Got to be honest though, you can’t get much more light-hearted than K-On!!

Originally, this post was going to be fairly short, however as I looked into Yui as a character more and more talking points seemed to sprout up! I’ve gone ahead and added her profile to the Potential Dyspraxic Character page and simply listed everything out if you rather a quick reference version. Link is at the bottom of this page.

Potential Dyspraxic Characters

For those unfamiliar with my blog, just a quick sum up what this is all about. This kind of post is for me to show how I perceive certain characters and the possibility that they could be dyspraxic. We have unique ways of connecting with fictional characters and sometimes we can relate to them in unusual ways. Seeing as dyspraxia is a combination of certain human traits, it means there’s a possible that characters may end up with a ‘dyspraxic combination’ purely by accident. In no way is this trying to discredit the original creation, but to see them in an alternative light. Take this, and any of my analyses, with a pinch of salt.

DISCLAIMER: With these character profiles I may bring up key-points and moments from their franchise, so potential minor spoilers ahead! Also as I’ve only seen the anime this analysis will leave out anything exclusive to the manga.

Yui and K-ON!

‘K-On!‘ is a popular slice-of-life manga revolving around the lives of the Light Music Club’s members, that got an anime adaptation. The anime has spanned several seasons, specials, spin-offs, a movie, and a library of music to date. For what this post is worth, if you want something light-hearted to get absorbed into then I highly recommend K-On! to you.

Could Yui Hirasawa be Dyspraxic?

Yui Hirasawa is the protagonist of ‘K-On!’; she is a member of the Light Music Club and the band Ho-kago Tea Time (After-School Tea Time). She is the lead guitarist and lead vocalist for the band. On the outside, Yui is your classic ditsy anime character; she’s easily distracted, sometimes forgetful, and gets into little accidents frequently. With other dyspraxic-type traits revealing themselves, it got the gears in my head turning and it simply clicked together for me that Yui could well have dyspraxia.

Co-Ordination and Clumsiness

Yui is really clumsy and has the habit of falling over, dropping things, tripping up, and bumping into people and objects. Over the course of the series, Yui shows she has balance issues. especially when she’s carrying something, like a tray of mugs or something bulky like a speaker. She’s a messy eater too as seen on a few occasions. On top of this, Yui sometimes has other slight issues with gross motor co-ordination.

On the flip-side, when it comes to fine motor skills Yui doesn’t have any real issues with it. After all, she has a certain talent for playing guitar.    

Oh Yui, I feel your pain!

Thought and Memory

Given that Yui’s short-term memory is awful and couple it with the fact she gets distracted ever so easily and you have a perfect recipe for disaster! When she learns something new, it often pushes something she memorised previously out of her head.

Yui’s time-keeping is pretty bad, although a few times she misread her alarm clock and arrived at school incredibly early. The first occurrence happens in the first episode where she even got distracted along the way…twice! The people around her have picked up on her unorthodox time-keeping skills and easily distracted nature, so it is fair to conclude this is a common occurrence for Yui.

Yui is quite forgetful too; whether it’s forgetting to do her homework or leaving her guitar at home on the day of a concert, she certainly doesn’t discriminate against what to forget! She struggles to remember music terminology and plays using intuition and her self-taught approach. Similarly, many people with dyspraxia find their own ways to learn and achieve when conventional ways are too difficult. At some point in the series she lost a mitten too, because of course she did! 

Yui struggles with multi-tasking and this is something that others are well aware of. At first, she found it impossible to sing and play her guitar simultaneously. Although, after some 1-2-1 tutoring she was finally able to crack it, but still has difficulty to do both sometimes.

A line extracted from her Wiki Bio: “She cannot do more than one thing at a time, but to make up for that she can be highly focused on a particular subject and once started, can advance quite substantially.”

When it comes to her academic abilities, Yui struggles tremendously with it. In one exam, she was the only one in her class to fail and had to retake it. With effort and support from her friends and sister she passed it second time around. However, not only did she pass it, but she absolutely aced it! While this alone isn’t exactly a dyspraxic trait, it embodies the spirit of dyspraxia quite nicely; especially when the other factors of Yui are taken into account.

Despite being viewed as stupid and an air-head, Yui is really observant and alert. A few times, she realises an issue before anybody else has.

We get a little bit of extra character building in K-On!’s spin-off series, ‘Ura-On!’. In one episode, we see that Yui gets lost easily and judging by her personality it wouldn’t be surprising if this is actually the case. I am unsure if ‘Ura-On!’ is canon or not, but it does seem faithful to the characters, so I’m going to count it.   

Perception of Senses

Yui has an aversion to both hot and cold temperatures and can’t deal with them very well. She’s also sensitive to air-conditioning units. Quote from Yui: “I’m scared of hot and cold. In winter, I hide under the heating table and in summer, I lie in bed and do nothing.”

As mentioned previously, her spatial awareness is something she struggles with as she does bumps into people and objects pretty often.

Something to note: Yui has the rare gift of having ‘perfect pitch’. Wikipedia states it as: “Absolute pitch (AP), often called perfect pitch, is a rare ability of a person to identify or re-create a given musical note without the benefit of a reference tone”. Wikipedia then goes on to state: “There is evidence of a higher rate of absolute pitch in the autistic population.” Dyspraxia and autism have overlaps, so there could be more to Yui than at first glance. In short, this helps solidifies an autistic side which by proxy, helps to cement a dyspraxic side.

For the Wikipedia page on ‘Absolute pitch’ click here

Emotion and Behaviour

Yui has difficulty controlling her emotions and can get overwhelmed easily. Even with positive news she can struggle processing it and have a mental overload. She can get overwhelmed if she has too much information to process, which can lead to an emotional breakdown. The Light Music Club members understand she has this difficulty and do their best for her. Mainly by explaining things to her in a way she’ll understand and also help calm her down when she has a meltdown.

Yui dozes off often as she does get tired fairly quickly. Although, there are times where she’ll go to bed late due to getting absorbed into practising guitar or revising. Additionally, she can have a short attention span and she gets distracted easily.

Yui has some social awkwardness to her and I think she struggles at picking up on non-verbal cues, like on some occasions taking jokes literally and sarcasm can fly over her head. Also, Yui sometimes hugs a little too hard because she lets her emotions get the better of her, but there is a possibility that there’s a co-ordination difficulty at work too.

Speech and Language

Sometimes Yui gets stuck for words and stutters, which is a link back into her getting overwhelmed. She has shown that sometimes she can get words mixed up too. These issues don’t crop up too often though.

Yui Overall

Yui has a strong connection to dyspraxia and in my opinion scores incredibly favourable overall. In fact, she tops the list! Yui’s prominent clumsiness, getting easily overwhelmed, and a pure heart make her a character that those with dyspraxia can probably relate to quite easily. While she can lose interest easily and gets distracted even easier, with the right help or push she can, and does, succeed. While it would seem no one has brought up a possibility of Yui having dyspraxia online, at least as far as I can tell, some people have raised the idea that she could be on the autism spectrum and/or have ADHD. With certain overlaps it isn’t a stretch to believe that she could be dyspraxic too.

Yui is an embodiment of Dyspraxic Fantastic at its core and holds a certain spirit of dyspraxia. What sets her apart from other characters on my list is a certain depth and richness to her character.

And to wrap this post up, a nice sentimental quote from Yui: “To the me back then, you don’t need to worry. You’ll soon find something you can do, something you can set your heart on.” 

Thanks for reading this post and please check out some of the links below for more information.

Extra Reading

Dyspraxic Characters Encyclopedia

Dyspraxic Characters Project Post

Yui Wiki Fandom Page

K-ON! Home Site

The post Post #133 – Could Yui from K-ON! have Dyspraxia? appeared first on DyspraxicFantastic.com.

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[adhdbuzz]

(Quick note - I have copied this over from my main blog - this is my content...)

ADHD, Neurodivergence, Identity…

I want to start blogging about some of my experiences with mental illness and neurodivergence. Two words, that before this year, I would never of used in relation to myself.

One of the most fascinating and somewhat crippling aspects of learning you are neurodivergent, is becoming so hyperaware of your thoughts, actions, personality, wondering what’s you and what’s your diagnosis, (or what you are imagining/projecting because of your diagnosis). I likely drive my friends mad talking or joking about it, but it’s hard to articulate the complete upheaval that learning this about yourself creates. Suddenly your entire history and personhood is re-defined. You have to change your narrative. I spent most of my teenagehood and childhood feeling removed/estranged from the people and world around me. More than feeling an ‘outcast,’ I felt myself an alien. I believed (and felt that others believed), that I was incredibly lazy and did not have the drive to puruse my passions and potential. This left such a hole in my heart and self-confidence. Imagine that you have this great love for something - or many things, but can’t even motivate yourself to take one single step toward it. You lose interest in every hobby you’ve ever taken up and you don’t understand why you can’t just do the thing. It seems easy for everyone else? What am I missing? So you compensate. Suddenly (and very briefly), you are really into note-taking and study blogs and watching countless hours of videos on how to get organised and ‘change your life’ and you imagine what kind of person you could become.  Or you start every new year or semester with the goal to just stay on top of things, just remember, just write it down - everyone else does it? Why can’t you? Inevitably, that falls away.

What happens when you can’t maintain this? When suddenly those three assignments are due, you’ve dropped out of your class/hobby, you’ve missed another opportunity, avoided another goal and heard another person tell you, ‘you just need to get organised…’ ‘ you’ve got so much potential, you just need to apply yourself!’ “I don’t understand how you forgot/didn’t do the thing/didn’t write it down!”

I don’t think I can ever effectively describe the impact that this has had on me. There is something so devastating in not understanding there is something different about your brain during the really sensitive, formative years of your life. Because you end up spending so much time trying to work out why you are not like everyone else, why you struggle with things that most people find easy, why it is a constant battle to stay afloat, to have people angry with you/criticising you for something that you both feel should be in your control, but neurologically isn’t.  

ADHD is so severly misunderstood. It’s invisible and it is crippling. The image of the little boy in class who can’t sit still or stop talking is such a prevalent and damaging stereotype. Before I got my diagnosis and before I even had looked into ADHD, I spent hours researching what could be wrong with me and doing online ‘tests’. These ranged from anxiety, to depression, Bipolar, PMDD and Personality Disorders, (strangely enough, ADHD often exists alongside other mental illnesses and I was diagnosed with co-morbidities…) But I think this gives a degree of context to what undiagnosed ADHD feels like, because it’s not someone who wont shut up, or sit still. To me it feels like everyone else got a manual on how to be a person and I didn’t. Often times, it’s the depressed, anxious, struggling teenager or young adult, who feels so inadequate, who feels like an alien, who can’t even trust their own passions or interests. Who is in a constant battle to meet the expectations of themselves and those around them. Who’s socially awkward or uncomfortable, who’s disocciated, who can’t follow a conversation, or instructions, who suffers in loud spaces, who struggles with small talk, strangers, shopping centres, keeping themselves and their space clean, uni work, school work, chores, family, friendships, relationships, their identity, their passions, there interests, their personality, regualating their emotions

ADHD is so exhausting, because it’s a constant battle to just meet the base line. Every thing you do from the moment you get up, til the moment you are asleep (and even then) is impacted by it.

Say you have an assignment, and a couple of chores to do on one day. Not a big deal right? Ok so you set an alarm for 8am, except your brain didn’t turn off until 4am the night before, so you get up at mid day, you go to put the washing in, but you forgot to turn on yesterdays load, so you do that first, you go to make a morning coffee, you check the time, it’s 12.30 - where did half an hour go? I just got up?! (Time-blindness). You make your coffee and drink it while checking social media, which sucks you in, because your dopamine depleted brain craves stimuli! You check the time, its 1pm, you tell yourself you’ll scroll for ten more minutes, and that ten minute excuse repeats a few times. It’s 1.30 and now your angry, because why didn’t you have the self control! (Hint: you have a disordered executive function). You put your mug on the sink, promising you’ll come back to it later. You go back to the laundry, you realise you forgot to turn the dryer on. You go to do your assignment, you clear your desk, open laptop, but now you don’t know where to start - you can’t naturally prioritise tasks, or break down the individual steps that need to be done in order to complete an assignment, you must do this with the ‘skills’ you have actively had to learn from a coach, internet etc. It’s like trying to bake a cake with no measuring cups, or recipe! So now you are looking at the assessment outline, and what you’ve worked on already, and trying to close last nights 200 tabs of hyperfixation. You read the outline 5 times without actually reading it, on the 6th you try really hard, you’re fidgeting in your chair, it’s an almost physical pain having to sit there and read it. Your eyes feel glazy, there’s too many words and they look like a big smudge on the page. You quickly check messages (dopamine hit), you come back to the outline. Its been half an hour, you still haven’t started. It’s about 2pm, you havent had lunch or breakfast. You go make a tea and come back. Maybe you need backround music? You spend another 20 minutes finding the right playlist, except its not right because it’s either too stimulating or not stimulating enough. You find another playlist, or you go down the rabbit whole of some movie soundtrack you’ve been meaning to look at. It’s 2.45. The washing! You go back and finally get yesterdays load in the dryer and start the load you meant to do today. Might as well make another tea now that I’m up. Might as well check Facebook now I’ve been interrupted. I’ll start at 3.30. 3.30 rolls around, your sibling gets home from school. Noise, talking, lunchbox rattling, bags being unpacked. Distraction. The noise is painful, your executive function (the impaired part of the ADHD brain) is also responsible for emotional regulation. Suddenly you are so fiercly angry at the noise being made in the rest of the house. It’s so over stimulating it feels like sandpaper on your brain and ears, you feel sick to your stomach with rage, you are crying, sobbing. All because people in the other room are talking. You lay on your bed trying to calm the overwhelm and increasing stress at not having done your assignment. It’s 4pm. Mum asks why you left your mug out, or didn’t do the dishes (you were too busy thinking about doing the washing!) She notes the machine still going and tells you that you wont have time to put it in the dryer tonight, you’ll have to do it tomorrow. But you need those clothes for tomorrow, you’re having breakfast with a friend. You’ll have to reschedule. You message your friend, and repeat the standard script “god I am so sorry, I’m such a mess, can we do later in the morning? I’ve got to do chores…” they can’t reschedule, you cancel. You sit back down with the assignment. You fidget. It feels like a physical pain to have to sit there and force yourself to do it. You’ll do it tomorrow. You pack up, and get ready for bed, removing the pile on your bed back to your desk. Your sheets are unmade, it’s uncomfortable and you feel agitated. You’ve forgotten to brush your teeth, or clean your face. You scroll online, or hyperfocus on a new hobby, project, idea, that wont interest you tomorrow, until 3am. You set your alarm for 8am…

This is just one small example and snapshot of ADHD and the impact of Executive Dysfunction. Here are a couple of examples/descriptions of how it feels from the ADHD subreddit.

“Schrodinger’s ADHD: Everything is interesting and boring at the same time. Every subject, every hobby.”

‘The Two ADHD Moods: I can’t do it / I can’t stop doing it. The two types of ADHD time: Now  /  Not Now The two ADHD memory modes: I literally can not recall the words that just                                                         came out of my mouth  /                                                                                       I can recite the opening paragraph of                                                                 every single magic tree house book.’

I also want to talk Neurodivergence, as this is another misconception when it comes to ADHD. In the way that Autism, Tourettes, Dyscalculia, Dysgraphia are all forms of neurodivergence, so is ADHD. ADHD is not a behavoural issue, but a neurobiological developmental disorder. ADHD also has many overlapping traits with Autism, (not to be confused as the same, ADHD is not on the spectrum). These include, sensory overwhelm/sensitivity, memory issues, hyperfocus/hyperfixation, interrupting conversation/trouble waiting in turn, issues reading/recognising social cues, stimming, perseveration, (getting ‘stuck’ on or repeating a thought, topic or idea, even if the conversation has moved on), and avoidance/trouble with eye contact.

To be clear, ADHD is not on the spectrum, a distinguishing feature between these neurotypes is the cause of the symptom. For example someone with ADHD may not recognise social cues due to inattention/overwhelm/impulsivity, where as someone with autism may struggle to interpret these social cues.

It is important for ADHD to be recognised as a neurotype, and not a behavoural issue.  When discussing ADHD traits with a neurotypical person, the response is often along the lines of ‘well everyone is a little distracted/unmotivated/lazy/forgetful/late sometimes.’ My response to that  ‘Would you say that everyone is a bit ‘socially awkward/shy’ sometimes to an autistic person? Or ‘everyone has trouble reading sometimes�� to a dyslexic person?’ I imagine the answer would be no, as it is understood that these traits are a consistent, uncontrollable and debilitating.

The more I have learnt and read about ADHD in the context of neurodivergence, the more I have tried to recognise the ways I hide or detract from my symptoms, by ‘masking’. This has included, taking on certain personas or feeding someone elses assumption about me as ‘the messy one,’ ‘the disorganised one,’ ‘the chaotic one.’ In the past I have almost embraced these stereotypes about myself, as it gave me a sense of identity, a framework with which to see and understand myself. Frustration and anger masked over-stimulation/overwhelm, I was not able to recognise the root of these feelings and I also learnt to fidget/stim in the ‘right’ way. When engaging in small talk with someone I am unfamiliar with, I often resort to mimicing or imitating how I have seen other people interact, speak etc and I am conscious of eye contact, (too much, too little?). I catch myself looking at people/staring too much and am constantly trying to gauge what the right amount is, where else to look, etc. I struggle a lot with taking turns in convesation, as I don’t always know where to interject, or I worry I will forget the thought, this has led me to just stay silent instead in conversations and present myself as serious, or elusive.

That’s really all I have to say for today. I think overall ADHD is far more complex and challenging than it is perceived to be, and these stereotypes are so harmful to people who have it and are trying to navigate not only their symptoms, but a world that is not understanding nor knowledgeable of the limitations and struggles of ADHD or neurodivergence.

I have a lot more to say on all this and will try and write more about this going forward. DM/comment etc if you have any thoughts or criticism of anything I have said. Disclaimer, I am still learning and may make mistakes regarding information, or discussing other neurotypes !

Here are some links you might want to check out if you have/think you have ADHD or you have a friend or family member with ADHD. I also highly, highly recommend the ADHD subreddit!

ADHD explained simply:

https://www.additudemag.com/what-is-adhd-symptoms-causes-treatments/

“ADHD is a developmental impairment of the brain’s executive functions. People with ADHD have trouble with impulse-control, focusing, and organization.

“’Attention deficit’ is, some experts assert, a misleading name. “Attention deregulation” might be a more accurate description since most people with ADHD have more than enough attention — they just can’t harness it in the right direction at the right time with any consistency.”

Comorbidities https://adhd-institute.com/burden-of-adhd/epidemiology/comorbidities/ “The majority of adults with ADHD have a diagnosed or undiagnosed comorbid psychiatric disorder, which can complicate diagnosis and treatment of ADHD.1-3“ ADHD and Autism https://www.spectrumnews.org/features/deep-dive/decoding-overlap-autism-adhd/ “A growing number of genetic studies support the notion of at least some shared causation between autism and ADHD. But imaging studies comparing brain structures and connectivity have yielded a confusing mix of similarities and differences. And some behavioral research has highlighted the possibility that outwardly similar features mask distinct underlying mechanisms. Inattention in a person with autism, for example, might result from sensory overload, and apparent social problems in someone with ADHD may reflect impulsivity. Perseveration https://www.understood.org/en/friends-feelings/common-challenges/self-control/perseveration-adhd-and-learning-differences

“(Kids) who perseverate often say the same thing or behave in the same way over and over again. And they do it past the point where it makes sense or will change anything. It’s like they’re stuck in a loop that they can’t get out of.”

ADHD and social skills https://chadd.org/for-adults/relationships-social-skills/#:~:text=Social%20Skills%20in%20Adults%20with,their%20inattention%2C%20impulsivity%20and%20hyperactivity.

“Social skills are generally acquired through incidental learning: watching people, copying the behavior of others, practicing, and getting feedback. Most people start this process during early childhood. Social skills are practiced and honed by “playing grown-up” and through other childhood activities. The finer points of social interactions are sharpened by observation and peer feedback.

Children with ADHD often miss these details. They may pick up bits and pieces of what is appropriate but lack an overall view of social expectations. Unfortunately, as adults, they often realize “something” is missing but are never quite sure what that “something” may be.”

ADHD and stimming https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/adhd/repetitive-behaviors-in-children-with-adhd-stimming-fidgeting-and-what-these-actions-may-mean/

“Many believe that stimming and fidgeting is reserved for those on the autism spectrum. However, it is now known that children with ADHD are just as likely to use repetitive body movements to self-stimulate. In fact, autistic stimming and non-autistic stimming are different. The main difference is that those with ADHD typically only use stimming for a short period of time while they are trying to concentrate. For example, someone with ADHD may stim for under an hour while those with autism will stim for several hours at a time. While stimming and fidgeting are typically seen as tapping or rocking, there are many other things that children with ADHD do to self-stimulate. There are actually five different variations of stimming, which include olfactory, vestibular, visual, tactile, and auditory.”

[coldtomyflash]

Could Barry have aspergers?

First, and I genuinely don’t mean this as any sort of attack, I just want to note that Aspergers = autism spectrum. Aspergers used to refer to a related spectrum but was often considered “milder” than autism, and modern research and clinicians have realized that they’re ultimately the same (broad) spectrum and the issue was their diagnostic tools classifying people on “severity”. There are issues with separating people into “high functioning” and “low functioning” groups the way the Aspergers/autism distinction does and there’s just… a lot of stuff that goes into this.

That being said, I think what you’re really asking for is more a question of “could Barry be neurodivergent, and specifically could he be somewhere on the the autism spectrum?”

And the answer is: of course! Why not?

For the purposes of headcanons, I always say: go for it, if it works for you.

For the purposes of canon-analysis, it’s a bit harder. Writers will sometimes write neurodivergent characters without even consciously realizing they’re doing it, because as human beings we recognize behavioral patterns and think “well this person is like that” without always knowing how to name or identify where that characterization comes from. This is part of the reason some characters get coded as neurodivergent without it ever being made explicit in the text (there are other, sometimes more insidious reasons as well but we don’t need to chat about them here).

I’m not sure if I’m the world’s best person to write an analysis of Barry as being on the autism spectrum specifically, because although my husband and some good friends of my are on the spectrum, I myself am not. I can take a stab at it for you though since I’ve been learning and reading a lot in the past few years about it (and may one day come back to that question I got like 2 years ago about Len being on the autism spectrum because… yeah, he really is I think). 

Anyway, hopefully what I say will ring true for people, fully realizing that of course all people on the spectrum are going to have slightly different experiences.

Before I do that, however, I also want to say that my personal headcanons for Barry are really that he’s ADHD, which is a related form of neurodivergence, and one that I’m more closely tied to (I’m not diagnosed but I show a ton of the signs and symptoms for it and it seems to run in my family, so I have more personal experience with it). So a lot of this discussion might end up looking more like general indicators of neurodivergence that can fall into autism spectrum and/or ADHD or both, as they do overlap a good deal.

Anyway!

Some canon discussion/evidence?

Well, first, Barry’s single-minded focus. Neurodivergent people can have difficulties with switching attention and can get totally absorbed by things, and Barry’s no different. Once he has a goal or a thought in mind, the rest of the world sort of gets put on mute, it seems. From searching for the Man in Yellow to Saving Iris to whatever the goal of the day is, that becomes ‘it’ for him for a little while.

That helps lead me to ‘special interests’ and hyperfixation. From what I can tell, Barry ran a blog on ‘the impossible’ and raced across the country looking for cryptids and other impossible events whenever he had the opportunity. I would say that this could be classified as a special interest for him. He likely has others or has had more in the past: musicals (maybe even specific ones), specific aspects of the sciences that he’s pursued, the Speed Force, etc.

Also, and I’m sorry if this ends up stereotyping slightly, people on the autism spectrum generally have advanced abilities in mechanical understanding (and score noticeably different as early as the age of 4 on tests of engineering/mechanical types of knowledge) and Barry demonstrates this type of understanding time and again in the show.

He uses those abilities all the time at crime scenes, and as the Flash as well, like when fighting Zoom and using gravity to his advantage. He pursued a career in the sciences and uses chemistry, physics, and mathematics in his everyday life (and when working on things such as the speed equation). 

A little less “stereotype” and we see Barry’s physical behavior. 

In S1, he was often physical awkward in that he was clumsy and backing into doors, always running, and seemed to have… too much energy? It’s been said elsewhere that speedsters, or at least Bart (from the future), were introduced in part as a metaphor for ADHD (and that at least Bart’s arc was supposed to help educate people about ADHD because comics can be awesome like that). So that spectrum of “too much energy, almost clumsy because of it, always moving and kinetic and touching or doing something or running out the door” has made me think of Barry as having ADHD and thinking of his behavior more from than perspective. But from an autism spectrum perspective, you sometimes see a lot of the same behaviors. Clumsiness is common, from what I’ve read (though of course, not for everyone. My husband is the least clumsy person I know). And being late! Barry is often late, and that can be a sign of ADHD for sure (I’m always late, my husband always wants to be exactly on time… it’s an issue).

In terms of sensory processing, I can’t think of anything too specific. Certain fabrics, textures, foods, or physical sensations can all be important to people on the autism spectrum due to how they process sensory information, but I don’t think canon provides us with much information for how Barry deals with sensation. I also can’t think of any evidence of physical stimming off the top of my head but sometimes that won’t be obvious anyway. Barry keeps chemistry toys in his lab (we’ve seen them in background shots a few times) but nothing else really comes to mind there. He paces a lot? Is standing whenever it’s an option, really? Rubs his hand over his hair/ head whenever he’s tense or anxious? None of that is specific to neurodivergence (over, say, anxiety) but it is still technically self-stimulation behavior.

In terms of speech patterns, I can’t think of any really canon examples of atypical speech patterns that might imply autism spectrum neurodivergence (in contrast to say, Julian, who is sometimes overly formal or literal to the point of awkward, which can be a sign of autism spectrum for some people). Barry does info dump a little sometimes about things related to speed (a new special interest? It would make sense) or other information, but the show doesn’t often give us conversations that aren’t related to the plot so it’s hard to say. 

(That being said, one of the things that used to be used to “distinguish” autism spectrum from Aspergers was the children with Aspergers didn’t show the same language-related issues in childhood, and now that we understand autism as more of a constellation of behaviors, not all of which will be present in the same person, it’s not overly surprising not to find it here. Also, Barry really doesn’t use almost any adjectives or flowery language, even few adverbs, and he sticks to either simple or exact words for things [in contrast to Wally who’s word-choice is a lot more diverse!] so maybe we do see a bit of evidence through that? His speech is relatively straightforward?)

(precise, specific, informative)

Sociality… well we know that Barry didn’t have many friends as a kid, especially after his mother died. He talks about having been bullied and we know he was a big anime nerd and part of a lot of clubs in high school. That’s not evidence in and of itself of neurodivergence because neurotypical kids get bullied all the time as well, but some of it could be a sign, especially because it’s clear through the clubs etc. that he was trying to put himself out there and maybe it wasn’t working. 

He clearly gets along just fine with other people who are on the side of scientifically-oriented (i.e., all of the Star Labs team, Felicity, eventually Julian) and other people who are smart and kind (Iris, Oliver) so it’s definitely not that Barry can’t make friends. But kids can be cruel and neurodivergence can be easier to notice in childhood for one reason or another (including because people haven’t ‘learned’ to hide or suppress their own signs as well, and it sucks that people would ever ‘have’ to but that’s what childhood teaches some folks).

In either case, there’s evidence he had issue socializing and pretty much only had Iris as a close friend until he hit adulthood? And it’s also clear that although he’s “liked” at the precinct, he doesn’t really have friends there and he sticks out, at least not until Patty came along.

Last points: again, not to stereotype, but anecdotally at least, there does seem to be some potential overlap between people on the autism spectrum and the asexual spectrum, and a lot of people headcanon or interpret Barry as being demisexual? Which makes a lot of sense to me, and could be part of an interpretation of Barry as being neurodivergent. (Though it really should be clearly noted that people can be on the autism spectrum without being on the asexual spectrum and vice versa, and I don’t want to imply otherwise!)

And… I think that’s most of what I have to say? I’d have gifs for more of this but honestly they aren’t easy to find for this topic ^^;

And I invite people to make additions to this post if they have any more headcanons or canon examples, or clarifying information? 

[tumblunni]

I have a question that I hope is ok. I have had a suspicion that I might have some form of autism for quite a while now and when you reblog posts that say something along the line of just autism things like the one you just did I have to do a double take because I do all of those things + have them happen to me and am shocked when I see I'm not the only one who does these things especially the really abstract. I don't ever bring it up though in fear that people get upset that I'm "faking"

Oh man, mystery person, that’s pretty heavy!! I know the feeling, it took me a LONG time of self-examination to work out whether I might have autism, and I actually did have to deal with a less-than-optimal response when I tried to talk to someone about it. My doctor outright said ‘but you seem too smart for that’, like.. what the fuck?? So seriously, you need to be prepared to be PERSISTANT. Don’t lose confidence in your decision! Make sure you get to see an actual diagnosis, don’t let them lock you out of it based on dumb stereotypes. Cos seriously, general practitioners going ‘hey this person probably doesnt have this thing that’s completely out of my division, and I wont even let them talk to that division’.. thats just.. GOD I really get frustrated and scared thinking how much more messed up my life would be right now if I’d listened to him and not ever got help for my condition!

So my advice is basically.. even if you don’t want to ‘self-diagnose’, please do ‘self-diagnose’.You need to be abnormally prepared for this, you need to have a list of all your symptoms, you need to learn the terms and have reference to point to in the event of them denying you the ability to talk to an actual psychologist. And you need to be prepared for them even treating you like you cant be autistic if you were capable of doing this!You need to hand-hold your general practitioner through explaining what autism even is, and do whatever the fuck you can so you can get transferred over to someone who actually knows who they’re talking about.Oh and common ‘self-diagnosis’ type stuff can also help a lot in the meantime, because doing research on the subject can lead you to finding new coping methods, finding other people to ask about the subject, and just generally tiding you over until you’re able to get a professional diagnosis and (hopefully) access to things like therapy and local autism community groups.Also, just, in some countries medical care is way less accessable, so I know not eveyrone is even able to get a professional diagnosis at all.

Oh, and an important thing is that autism is a spectrum and there are many different symptoms you can have. it can even be hard to discover your own symptoms, you might find that they manifest in a weird way because you’ve been subconciously trying to hide them or using some form of unhealthy coping method for years. Going undiagnosed into your adult years is really like.. one of the primary causes for autism being REALLY disabling! Dear god my stage of treatment right now is just learning to untangle a bunch of bullshit I’ve done to myself over the years, and re-learn basic life skills and self confidence. I think if i’d been born into an environment with people who actually would have recognised it and cared about getting me help as a kid, i could have grown up without most of my anxiety issues!Another important fact is that adult autism is often co-morbid with anxiety issues, due to the circumstances of being left completely alone to deal with this thing for your entire life with no support. There’s also just a lot of ways certain anxiety disorders (as well as ADHD) can have overlapping symptoms with autism spectrum disorders. A lot of the ‘that feel when’ meme stuff can be relateable to all three of these otherwise quite different disorders. So I’d reccommend looking up info on ADHD, PTSD, generalized anxiety disorder, and related conditions too, and maybe seeing which disorder seems most similar to what you’re experiencing. And don’t be scared if it seems like you might have multiple of them! In real life being ‘all the tokens at once’ is VERY MUCH not ‘unrealistic’, man I really hate those people who’re like ‘hwaaa someone who’s black AND gay AND in a wheelchair? political correctness gone maaaad!’ Seriously, its very VERY possible to have more than one mental illness, especially ones that might have a knock-on effect causing another one. Going undiagnosed and untreated for ANYTHING can lead to developing anxiety and depression, but going undiagnosed for a social disability makes it especially likely to get specifically social anxiety.oh, and randomly for an example I happen to also have prosopagnosia, which means I can’t tell the difference between people’s faces. I literally cannot recognise my best friend if she changes her hairstyle or glasses. This is kinda Double Hell combined with autism, cos its already a challenge for me to judge people’s emotions, lol!

Oh man I’m kinda going offtopic and just rambling every damn fact I know, but I’m just hoping maybe something will be helpful??I really am not an expert on autism, I dont even know any good informative blogs to link you to. I’m just a regular person who happens to have the condition, and I don’t know how to give good advice when i’m still quite often suffering from denial and self hate myself...But I dunno, I just hope it could help to hear my personal experience, and know that you’re not alone.Though now I’m worrying maybe this post is a little intimidating so it might make you feel worse?? Seriously, this is just a worst case scenario thing, hopefully your doctor won’t be as casually gatekeepy as mine was. And I mean, he seemed like a good man who wasnt exactly rude about it and wasnt doing it on purpose. If anything that worries me more, tho, cos he was just politely saying ‘haha no you’re wrong’ to a patient, about a subject he wasnt remotely qualified in, and wouldnt have ever considered reccommending me to a professional if i hadnt kept nagging him about it and come back with a bunch of research and stuff. It felt SO damn cathartic to get that ‘YES, AUTISM’ in the end! Shame I couldnt show it to him and I probably would have had my entire healthcare cut forever if I boasted XDAlso, I was lucky that I had my charity support worker to help me through the stress of the assessment interviews. I hope you have at least one person who’d be able to be there for you and believe you, in times like these. Or, even if you’re like me and you dont’ have any family and stuff, I hope you end up meeting a surprisingly awesome governent worker lady who wears a cool hat and helps you out. Seriously, Amber, you’re a godsend!

So umm.. yeah.. i am REALLY sleep deprived and I am not good at words but i hope some of this helped?? I hope you’re okay, anon!And honestly, reading ‘lol relateable jokes’ type posts on people’s blogs was how I first started suspecting I was autistic, too. I’d grown up buried in so many stereotypes of mentally ill people, I never thought I was one of them until I actually got to read blogs from their perspective. Joke posts obviously aren’t a substitute for a diagnosis, but I think they kinda serve a valuable role in the self acceptance process, yknow? Thank you, joke posts!