#dopamine training
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I’m cooking up a comic based on @jellfishjellfish fic Derelection. Check it out on Ao3. Warning. It’s so good you might break into tears.
This story is so heart wrenching, heart breaking,and heart warming; I can’t recommend it enough.
#myart#trolls#branch#john dory#dereliction#wip#comic#I think I’m coming to realize that this particular gif is my hyperfixation with a hyperfixation#hopefully I can finish this fanart before the dopamine train runs out of steam#should maybe take the rest of the week to get all these pages finished#no promises though#when JellFish finished this story I believe I will bestow upon it the highest honor I can give#I will print out the story and actually keep it on my bookshelf
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Me: I'm not sure if my health can withstand a commute. Should I try to go in tomorrow?
Apollo: no
Me: should I plan to work from home?
Apollo: no
Me: ...
Apollo:
Me: migraine?
Apollo: migraine.
#(cue it starting immediately afterwards)#i managed to take some painkillers in time to stave the migraine off but i still felt like shit the next day#so i couldnt have worked regardless#this was monday night (and tbf sunday & monday were *extremely* tiring days. i was falling asleep while crocheting & playing ac#which is rare even considering my fatigue issues)#yes/no divination has been great as a way to consult apollo without pulling out the tarot deck (which is more time consuming and takes#a *lot* more spoons)#the only issue is that when i do the stones or tarot i tend to get on a Divination Kick tm which is. not helpful b/c what am i going to do??#i've already finished asking what i needed to ask???#i should probably funnel that burst of dopamine/hyperfixation into researching different methods actually#gonna add that to the routine#also! working out the kinks with the yes/no method. doing it on my floor? no good. inconsistent results. Feels Bad. Loud#doing it on my bed? wonderful 10/10. very consistent results. Feels Good. not loud#i still do tarot on the floor though b/c having a flat sturdy surface is nice#for reference: my commute is 2-2.5 hrs each way via public transit. the sensory experience drains me *very* fast if im not careful and#we're in Purgatory Weather season where it's *juuust* warm & humid enough to maybe be a problem but isnt one For Sure#*and* the state fair is on so the trains are gonna be packed when im trying to get home#coriander says#helpol#hellenic pagan#hellenic polytheism#apollo#theoi#pagans of tumblr#hellenic community#paganblr
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Hello random irrational anger. May I interest you in a niche rabbit hole to fall into at 3am while you’re here?
#pondhead rambles#the way I deal with random mood swings is to learn new stuff#get that dopamine back on the train please#anger is a stowaway and I will shoot it on sight#I’m a mean person when I’m angry so I try not to be#anyways did you know that golden barrel cacti are endangered in the wild#but they thrive in public gardens n shit#they’re easy to grow but over harvesting and habitat destruction has caused a decline#they’re ornamental cacti too :)
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I’ll have at least two free hours at work later today… wonder if I’ll end up writing or bingeing the backlog of Kathryn content from this last week and a half 🥵
#I’m still not over ike jumping on the lesbihahn train#this whole thing is giving me so much dopamine#I feel like agatha getting juiced up by billy at the end of the series#not snz#it could be if I fucking write though!!!
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No caving tomorrow :( :( :(
#Caving#Real life#I was supposed to go caving for like 8 hours tomorrow#What the hell am I supposed to do now#I cannot go caving by my self in have no gear and you need a group of three to go and#Idk if you've ever seen a cave map before but I've been doing land navigation since I was kid and have negative idea how to read that shit#Especially bc they stopped printing paper maps (apparently caves change often enough that it's just not worth it????)#And the maps you find online are purposefully wrong#Apparently graves caves has a high risk of death#And hyperthermia#And just straight up death if you send someone through the water tunnels when the person before is stilling trying to do tricky move to get#Hiking just doesn't give me the same dopamine hits anymore :(#Also I have none of my own caving gear#And I couldn't go to vertical training tonight bc work and flashbacks:( :( :(
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I LOVE BEYBLADE SO MUCH IT'S UNREAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#the sweetsies. dear god. dear god. socutes#multi's like yknow robin you don't have to do all this and robin's like nah i like training with jaxon it's a lot of fun ^_^#and then he offered to help him out of the pool and jaxon stared at him for a full uninterrupted ten seconds before smiling#socutes. and then in the next episode preview dialogue jaxon was like robinnn can you carry me can you feed me and robin's like yeah yeah...#how schweet. yay :3#beyblade#the jaxon angst is so fun too. like. yeah this bitch really just has undiagnosed adhd his whole conflict is chasing dopamine 😭😭#dude woke up from his gay dream memory about how stagnant their life has become and he's like 😐 i am so hungry.#like ouyyhhhg. OOIIUUYHHHYYGGHGHGHYGGHG#built for me. built for me really and truly built for me
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Okay I need help like right now! I know I've seen a gif on here before with Demeter singing the "Are you tense when you sense there's a storm in the air" line and I need to see it again but I CANNOT FIND IT! Please cats fandom I beg you. Help me!
#it's for science I promise#the science is dopamine#my dopamine to be exact#i feel like skimbleshanks' crashed train and only this gif will fix it /j#cats the musical#demeter cats#my post
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#I haven’t been online all day so idk what the discourse has been like compared to yesterday#But can I just say that in a lot of videos that I saw - Brittany and Taylor were studiously ignoring each other#And I have been reflecting Jaime’s post about who else was in the box and what the event was and who was invited#And I feel like I fell into the trap of trying to interpret an entire social situation based on a few moments#And forgot that she and Brittany both have conversations and experiences outside of what we witness#Which I am usually fairy aware of with Taylor but I think it’s easier to slip into it when she does something that I wouldn’t do#Like it’s just so much easier (for me) to dehumanize people when they’ve done something “bad”#And that pattern seems related to the internal cancel culture (bullshit) and the desire for accountability (punitive version)#Which creates this impulse to sort people as good and bad#Which is not at all to say that I imagine Taylor is theoretically justified in being friendly with someone endorsing a dictator#But that my reaction to my assumption about her being BFFs with that vile woman led me to jump on a hate train without watching the footage#And like everybody has a right to be upset by her actions- which are pretty literally enabling a dictator to benefit from her name.#But I don’t think it’s as simple as her being besties with the lady. And I am trying to remind myself that I am not on a global stage#I was just as friendly with a trumper a few days ago at an HOA picnic. Which does not exist in a vacuum-#I am politically active in the community around some big picture stuff and part of that means I need the truly vile people to respect me#And i need to ask about their kids and remember their names and their health issues or whatever and let them hug me#Because that is what being in a collaborative harm reduction type political position means for me. I get waaaayyy..#More radical shit done when they trust me and enjoy chatting with me about trees and know I see them as human#And Taylor is obviously in a vastly different situation than me - she has a lot more power in many many ways- but she also#Certainly has more context (like me bc she’s a whole person) that we’re not privy to.#Idk sorry for the long rambling praxis rant#Just was at a RJ training all day talking about prison abolition and now am processing by philosophizing about Taylor#Just there’s a lot less dopamine hits in taking a step back then there are in reposting stuff without context#Which again is not to say that anyone shouldn’t be upset. The situation is imo objectively upsetting.#And taking a step back and giving a person the benefit of the doubt is most often allowed for white women#And we should practice taking the time to do that whenever we can and like if I can’t even do it with a famous lady I don’t know#How am I supposed to learn and practice doing it in my own life#Idk#c#TJ
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JOKER OUT SONGS - BATTLE ROYAL (P.15)
We finally have the song that will be saved! Padam had an amazing comeback and will return for 3rd Round!
Now...our next battle is:
Part 14 | Part 16 | Summary (round 2)
#I'm praying to all kris girlies right now#i need you#I'm exhausted after almost dying running during a heat wave in lisbon with my luggage and someone surviving a 30 minute train delay#i would be very happy to see Dopamin staying in this tournament#joker out#joker out battle royal#music#slovenian music#slovenia#european music#eurovision 2023#europe#eurovision#demoni#umazane misli#Spotify
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we have an especially bad migraine where I noticed us getting aura (mostly being pissed off and upset in a specific way) for several hours before it started and we've taken pain meds but I'm not sure they've actually helped. they have definitely given us side effects though and I feel very spaced out and nauseous and generally shit.
we've also had way worse ADHD symptoms for the last few days to the point of being pretty much unable to focus on anything besides like 2 things we've hyperfixated on. we've had so much trouble starting tasks and keep struggling to hold a train of thought or focus long enough to even figure out what we need to do each day despite having all our Habitica dailies to tell us.
our brain is all over the place and I'm not really sure what to do with it or what would help but it's just occurred to me that sometimes our ADHD gets really bad in the buildup to some of our worst migraines and now I'm just hoping that both the migraine and other shit ease off soon because I'd like to be able to function
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#posts made on pain meds#I've spent like 6 hours drawing today because we fixated on one piece of art that I originally started as a joke#but I probably had other tasks to do and I don't know what any of them were and I tried very hard to at least make a list or something#but just could not hold a coherent train of thought and got really overwhelmed every time I tried to think of stuff I needed to do#so I gave up after a while because I realised my options were to keep trying and failing and just get upset and start dissociating#and end up doing absolutely nothing while feeling really bad#or just go ahead and draw for as long as I can handle because our brain's fixated on it and at least I'd be doing something#and it's also nice to actually be able to work on art for any length of time after having such bad art block so far this year#oh I did also shower shortly after we woke up which was our main big task of the day I think so that's something to be proud of#our tourette's has been bad and that made it surprisingly difficult and it was kind of stressful and exhausting but we did it#it's also just occurred to me that our tourette's and ADHD and a few other issues have all flared up together#followed by a particularly bad migraine which is a pattern we keep noticing and first noticed back in December#and all these issues are known to involve dopamine but I can't figure out what exactly is going on#when it happens we also start getting sensory overload way more easily
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two android girls sparring for their owner/wife because they have a praise kink only for them both to get a treat of running obedience training code while being told how to play with each other and getting point rewards that are equivalent to dopamine when they do good
your mind is such a powerful place. i want to stay here longer
#<<333#clicker training but there is no auditory clue or learned behavior#you simply have a button that releases my dopamine#i want more of this *gestures broadly*
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last reblog is actually a lie, i am unmedicated but its making me less enthusiastic about my interests. yippee!!
#like i'm still big on the autism train choo choo next stop special interest#but like! its a lot duller than usual. i want my dopamine hit. where is it.
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people I look up to are reblogging/liking my Devotion Breaks art I am going to pass away
#oh my god????#dopamine be hitting so hard#debating advertising my fic but also don't wanna be a buisnessman about it#devotion breaks#infinity train#eco echos
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i got a tamagotchi finally!! 😄😄😄 they were on sale. i'm soo happy about it. i'mma carry them on my belt loop til their batteries die, at least.
#now that i actually have one i understand the appeal less than ever before#but i'm still really really happy#i guess maybe it's just a little dopamine boost? a little task?#like 'oh i gotta check on something' then within one or two minutes you've Done The Thing#so it's like a little task completion training course?#idk i just love them#they weigh 16lbs now!#adam talks too much
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How the Brain Manages Addictions
A sample chapter from my new book, “Train Your Brain for a Healthier and Happier Life.” Habits, Cravings, and Deceptive Reward Systems Shape Behavior Dear Avid Readers, Addiction is one of the biggest problems in the modern world. We are all addicted to different things somewhat. However, it is possible to recover from our addictions with practical tools and viable solutions that can rewire…
#addictions in the brain#addictions in the minds#cognitive performance#Cognitive Science#Deltafosb#dopamine dysregulation#dopamine system#mental health#neurobiology of addiction#neuroscience of addiction#Self Improvement#Train Your Brain for a Healthier and Happier Life
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