dissecting episode 1
(under the microscope. im mostly dissecting jaewon hes so interesting to study as a queer person myself, smiles)
ignoring the very first clip which shows waves and someone grabbing someone else... a bit confusing i dont have many thoughts about this.
ANYWAY ! we first see jaewon sitting on a couch in a office perhaps? with an aquarium (we see this again on the intro of episode 2 and if you see the trailer theres a close up of his face on the same place as well) and a women sits down in front of him and asks him what his worries are. now i cant make much sense of her behaviour cause she suddenly starts laughing? but id think shes some sort of counselor. now this could be for 2 reasons: one. he just left the military after finishing his mandatory time and it might be a thing they do? or two some other reason we dont know most likely. TRAUMA shocking i know.
then we have the restaurant scene. we see jaewon talking with his friends but his face changes when his friends keeps talking about how jaewon has a great life and connections and money and everything he wants and i dont want to state the obvious but... thats clearly not the case which is why we can see jaewon upset with the conversation even though he doesnt say anything about it and even forgives his friend... his relationship with his parents is most likely not the best and we can see that by the messages his mom sends and the way we can just see him in front of his gate but not getting inside.
then. their first real scene. jaewon asks jihyun for a cigarette he goes and grabs TWO which surprises jaewon a little bit and makes him happier probably because thats different not a lot of people would do that. they talk but its very casual like and somehow jaewon mentions a "동생" and gets real quiet, as if something had happened with that person. now, its translated as "younger brother/sister" because thats the only english word that it can translate to EVEN THOUGH (and im saying this as someone with very limited korean language knowledge) its not the most correct one because its just a word that people use to call someone whos younger than them (yes siblings count lol). so is he talking about a younger sibling or someone else? who knows.
when his friends grab him to go home he leaves but he isnt expecting for jihyun to just grab his hand and give him a lighter (it was such an intimate scene as well, very queer coded) and THATS what caught jaewons attention. because at first he was just making conversation, but that small moment changed how the path of their futures (hope im not getting too philosophical), and he even stopped and looked as jihyun left.
fast foward next day, jihyun sees jaewon and goes afterhim but loses him and finds the poster for free bird instead (soulmatism i say). and its at this point i realize i havent spoken much abour jihyun so ill start now. we know hes a small town boy, isnt used to such a big city like seoul and is even confused with all this new stuff hes seeing. thats how jaewon and him are different. to me, jihyuns fear is based on unfamiliarity and the unknown, hes still getting to know all these new things that hes never known before and thats why he later mentions that thats the reason he signed up for the surf club. he doesnt really know how to swim but he wants to try and face this new challenge onwards. jaewons fear is more rooted on past experiences and trauma is my guess. he knows who he is but hes scared or hes scared of the result if he tries something. i think its going to start to get better the more he gets to know jihyun and the more he gets comfortable with him.
the cafeteria. jihyuns eating alone and jaewon is suddenly there and thanking him for the other day (he means it. that second cigarette probably was everything to him at that time) and starts to get a bit bold with him, and asking him why he didnt call and at this point there are so many jihyun reactions where you can just tell how this type of relationship is new to him but also how he wants to explore it and find out where it takes him.
we can see that when he meets jaewon again outside the restaurant and says "if we're going to be friends we need to know each others names" and jaewons truly gets a bit paralysed? confused? about it, he wasnt expecting jihyung to say something like that. tells him his name and leaves.
going a bit back, jaewon is at the same restaurant again. why? because he remembered that it was the restaurant jihyuns worked at and he convinced his friends to go inside with some excuse only to look for jihyun but... he wasnt there. things start to go downhill when his friends mention his ex who he wants to have nothing to do with and just wants to forget and one of them even invites her over! some friend he is... jaewon gets reasonably upset (ill talk about what i think happened with the break up on the ep2 essay bare with me), leaves and jihyun goes after him. in this scene i dont think jaewon is upset with him but it was a mixture of a lot of things, disappointment from not seeing jihyun when he was the reason he went to the restaurant in the first place, anger at his supposed friend inviting his ex who he doesnt like and thats why he says "i didnt see you earlier" with this really empty sort of expression.
and lastly, the very last scene. he sits with jihyun for two reasons: be away from his ex but also because he genuinely wants to continue whatever this relationship with jihyun is. it makes him happy and its different and GOOD something that he doesnt have a lot going around his life...
yea... thats it. my thoughts are all scattered but yea lets talk about it if u want i have so much to say still and i want to hear what everyone else is thinking and i also want to mention how much i love this already it was hook line sinker the first episode it. it just feels so raw and perfect and so queer coded to which is why i want to kind of gatekeep it from people who are just watching bc its u know... a bl (will i be persecuted like the witches used to by saying this... hm)
the playlist is so good as well been on repeat for hours
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Birdemic
Welcome to the 'highglossfinish' room.
caffienatedconfetti: henlo bby
caffienatedconfetti: fair warning the first bit of this movie is like 5 minutes of boring
caffienatedconfetti: followed by 10 more minutes of watching a guys doing stuff
Knock Out: I can live with that.
caffienatedconfetti: i havent watched it yet because i'm not that masochistic but i figured it's bids, so
caffienatedconfetti: huehuehuehuehue
Zephra85: MOVIE NIGHT YAAS
Zephra85: Hi everyone!
Jalaperilo: I always forget whuch shade of green I pick for my name
Jalaperilo: but hello!
Zephra85: Same with gray for me
thenightetc: So I understand we're in for a "treat"?
Jalaperilo: i think we've been tricked by this film lol
caffienatedconfetti: the first 30 min are pretty boring tho idk
caffienatedconfetti: i havent seen it, only watched a reveiw
caffienatedconfetti: it looked funny
Jalaperilo: the first 90 minutes if boring lol
Jalaperilo: *is
Cardinal: I'm hesitantly ready!
Knock Out: Beautiful!
thenightetc: No doubt we can amuse ourselves with mockery :)
Zephra85: 'hesitantly ready' is a good way to describe the beginning of these streams
caffienatedconfetti: it may or may not be worth it just for the """"""special effects""""""""
caffienatedconfetti: those giant airqoutes sink in?
Knock Out: The more air quotes, the better.
Jalaperilo: so who has seen this film?
Zephra85: Not me, never even heard of it
Knock Out: Oh, this will be fun.
thenightetc: Ditto. I thought it sounded like a video game
Knock Out: Go away, bold button.
Jalaperilo: be bold
Knock Out: Scream everything.
Jalaperilo: make strangers on the internet not know if you're being ironic or not
thenightetc: I don't think bold is screaming per se. More an emphatic tone of voice, which may or may not be a *little* louder than normal
thenightetc: Reverb, maybe.
Zephra85: caps is yelling
caffienatedconfetti: ROYAL CANTERLOT VOICE
Jalaperilo: what about bold caps?
Zephra85: bold is... a tone
thenightetc: Yeah!
caffienatedconfetti: IT IS THE ULTIMATE CANTERLOT VOICEW
Zephra85: extreme agression
Jalaperilo: I'm gonna start a fight with bold capital letters
caffienatedconfetti: ON MY WAY TO STEAL YO GURL
Knock Out: I'm concerned for the humans involved here. Their lifespans aren't long enough to waste on this movie.
Jalaperilo: this is my second time watching it. if i was concerned abour wasting my life, i wouldnt be here
caffienatedconfetti: oh dont worry the women in my family live to be at least 100
caffienatedconfetti: i have plenty of time to waste
Knock Out: Oh, well, in that case!
Knock Out: "Vetnamese."
caffienatedconfetti: you mean vietnamese?
thenightetc: ...Have you started it? It's showing as offline for me
Zephra85: Same for me
caffienatedconfetti: what does that have to do with anything? did i miss something
caffienatedconfetti: also yeah same
Knock Out: Well, glad we caught that one early!
Knockout: Is it showing now?
caffienatedconfetti: thar we go~
Knockout: Beautiful!
thenightetc: There it is! I had to click pause and play but it is now
Cardinal: I see it!
Knockout: Well, not for me. I have to sit through fifteen minutes of that again.
thenightetc: There, there
Zephra85: Oh pausing and unpausing worked for me too
Jalaperilo: im sure you did something to deserve that
Zephra85: but I missed the beginning, drat
Zephra85: oh well
caffienatedconfetti: primus is trying to get your organs to explode
thenightetc: Just scenery shots
Jalaperilo: i forgot that the film director tries to be hitchcock like in this
caffienatedconfetti: is it working
thenightetc: God would it kill you to mount the camera on something instead of just holding it
Cardinal: . . .
Cardinal: Well, it's a thrill ride so far!
thenightetc: ...I'm just saying.
Jalaperilo: Zephra, you could not watch the first 30 minutes and you would have missed nothing
caffienatedconfetti: this music loop is killing me slowly
caffienatedconfetti: AGAIN
caffienatedconfetti: WHY
Cardinal: help
caffienatedconfetti: send help
thenightetc: It's the only music they licensed
caffienatedconfetti: i';m being held against my will my address is123 help
Cardinal: it keeps happening
Zephra85: LOL
Jalaperilo: the director saw Psycho and thought that was the way that all films should begin
caffienatedconfetti: if it loops again i swear to god
caffienatedconfetti: KNIFE TIME
thenightetc: pfffffff
Jalaperilo: hahah!
thenightetc: At this point it's like a running joke
Cardinal: The music is the true villain of this movie.
thenightetc: ...That didn't sound like a car door
caffienatedconfetti: and here we see the beta male, going out on the hunt for cheap fast food
thenightetc: *mildly unsettled*
Zephra85: cronch
caffienatedconfetti: OW
caffienatedconfetti: WHAT IS THIS AUDIO
Zephra85: cronch cronch
caffienatedconfetti: WHAT IS HER FACE
caffienatedconfetti: LOOK BOOBS
Jalaperilo: i realised I have blocked out 90% of this film as i forgot how angry i got at its *** cinematography
Zephra85: what is going on with the sound editing
caffienatedconfetti: "durrrrrrr henlo this isn't creep at all"
caffienatedconfetti: nice dud ver classy
thenightetc: Did she... pay?
caffienatedconfetti: stalker much
thenightetc: THEN DON'T.
Cardinal: how do you think he knew that
caffienatedconfetti: ew
Cardinal: ha ha creepy
Cardinal: stellar acting
thenightetc: wooooooow
caffienatedconfetti: "hello person ive never met let me tell you everything abotut me"
Zephra85: legit tho
caffienatedconfetti: "here's my phone number, address, and pin number"
thenightetc: they're cutting between different takes of the audio aren't they too
thenightetc: Oh my god
caffienatedconfetti: wait you saw each other 2 seconds ago why did you say hi again
caffienatedconfetti: end me
Cardinal: WAS IT nice talking to him? Was it?
Jalaperilo: my guess is that they didnt have a boom mic and so just used the camera mic
thenightetc: I hope he dies.
caffienatedconfetti: IT'S SO EASY TO MAKE AN EFFECT TO MAKE IT SOUND LIKE UR ON THE TV WHY
Zephra85: the news announcer has the least stilted acting, what does THAT say about this movie
caffienatedconfetti: sorry for babbling its just YIVUJGHFH
Jalaperilo: hey knock knock, have you ever shown Megashark vs Giant Octopus?
Cardinal: ((At some point we should watch THe Time Machine I Found At A Garage Sale.
Knockout: I can't say that I have.
Cardinal: ((Legitimately the worst movie I've ever seen.
caffienatedconfetti: brb getting a seltzer and flushing my dignity down the toilet
Jalaperilo: its a great film that should deffo go on the list
thenightetc: "THIS MOVIE WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY CHEVRON"
Zephra85: heh
Zephra85: the bf and I do that too whenever there's a lingering shot of a brand logo
Zephra85: 'BROUGHT TO YOU BY _____'
thenightetc: Although in this case I'm willing to believe they were just eating up a little time there.
Cardinal: This movie is killing me
Cardinal: I don't care about your big fish, fleshie
Jalaperilo: *** off
Jalaperilo: one mil in a firm like that?
Zephra85: yyyyeah that's not happening
thenightetc: Oh. Oh god.
Jalaperilo: did no one want to pay the elec bill
thenightetc: He's going to come bother her at her work ISN'T HE >:(
Jalaperilo: ?
Zephra85: hello pufferfish desktop bg
thenightetc: *transfixed by the pufferfish*
thenightetc: This is an improvement
Zephra85: very
Cardinal: The pufferfish looks how I feel
Zephra85: this pufferfish is portraying more genuine emotion than any of the actors
Jalaperilo: the stalker from the restaurant
Cardinal: I continue to not like the guy
Cardinal: UGH
Zephra85: VETnamese eh?
thenightetc: Whyyyyy. Why would she go on a date with that guy.
caffienatedconfetti: what happened
caffienatedconfetti: where's the movie?
Cardinal: The pufferfish ate it
Zephra85: it's been replaced by this vastly superior pufferfish
Jalaperilo: my guess is the mouse got moved to the bottom right corner that turns all windows transparent
Cardinal: I'm sure whatever we imagine them doing is more interesting than what they're actually doing.
caffienatedconfetti: where's knockout?
thenightetc: God, I hope they BOTH die. Both these guys.
Jalaperilo: it beans our host has left us to suffer alone lol
Zephra85: Nuuuu bring back the pufferfish
Cardinal: Pufferfish, don't abandon us
Knockout: I'm back, and nothing happened!
Zephra85: was... was her ringtone a bicycle bell?
Knockout: Where did it leave off?
thenightetc: the audio is killing me
caffienatedconfetti: that awkwa rd pause
thenightetc: oh my god. why
thenightetc: This is the worst editing I've ever seen
caffienatedconfetti: everything is going great for everyone: news at 11
Jalaperilo: we're ok withnot catvhing up with what we lost
Zephra85: legit
Zephra85: yeah srsly
caffienatedconfetti: that wheeze tho
Zephra85: the sound editing is hurting me more than the video editing
caffienatedconfetti: this is sexist to both sexes
thenightetc: Yeah, that's what I mean.
Knockout: I can see why you all preferred the pufferfish.
thenightetc: I hope a bird bites his dick off.
Zephra85: I miss the pufferfish
thenightetc: That's... what this movie's about, right? Eventually?
caffienatedconfetti: and aslo, sexist to sexes that don't exist
Jalaperilo: i was starting to have a bad evening but the rage i feel at this film has burned up all the anxiety lol
caffienatedconfetti: it's a preachy global warming film apparently
caffienatedconfetti: oh god please
caffienatedconfetti: why this
caffienatedconfetti: no
thenightetc: Why was there a watermelon carved into a basket
caffienatedconfetti: *overly long shot of a roof*
Zephra85: because discussing the location of the solar panels he's installing is intregal to the plot
Jalaperilo: global warming is fake, the earth is flat and new coke was a marketing ploy to boost sales of coke classic!
caffienatedconfetti: what
thenightetc: *silent handshake*
caffienatedconfetti: oh ok
caffienatedconfetti: racist now
caffienatedconfetti: loveluy
Zephra85: that hug was so awkward but I bet it wasn't acting
caffienatedconfetti: *overly long shot of a ffffuking WALL*
caffienatedconfetti: THIS IS NOT ART
thenightetc: Self-burn!
Knockout: "I have to go all of a sudden."
caffienatedconfetti: no none cares
Jalaperilo: wanna watch tedious superflouous plot that goes nowhere, watch the 4th film of a certain franchise we all like.
caffienatedconfetti: which one lol?
thenightetc: it's so conspicuous how the background music is just another 15 second loop and not actually something that would be playing in a restaurant
caffienatedconfetti: he looks dead inside
Jalaperilo: maybe he is?
caffienatedconfetti: that or he's planning her murder
thenightetc: Her dog, right
caffienatedconfetti: close- a cat
thenightetc: ...Okay, I was close
Zephra85: oh THAT'S her strategy
Zephra85: get out of this awful date by talking about her cat non stop
thenightetc: Those, uh
thenightetc: Those are some slow and unbeleivable birds
caffienatedconfetti: 0those certainly are some graphic
Jalaperilo: top of the line computer graphics, brought to you by mspaint
Jalaperilo: knock, you gonna fatshame these birds
caffienatedconfetti: that is a reenscreen?
Zephra85: it freaking was
thenightetc: Oh god, did they make them slow-motion so they wouldn't have to make as many frames
Knockout: Of course not. My spark goes out to those birds.
Zephra85: they live a painful existence of terrible animation
caffienatedconfetti: bet you 20 bucks theres a support group for birdemic actors
Knockout: Classy.
thenightetc: Ugh.
thenightetc: Now just stand there outside her house all night.
Zephra85: oh god that scene change was abrupt and painful
caffienatedconfetti: oh god another old lady
Zephra85: that's her mother
caffienatedconfetti: no why
Zephra85: she looks old enough to be her grandmother
caffienatedconfetti: poor lady
Jalaperilo: shes pretty good at acting
caffienatedconfetti: i thought she said her mom wasn't supportive?
caffienatedconfetti: ew?????
Zephra85: 'marry rich'
Zephra85: 'I love your advice mom'
thenightetc: That's funny because I keep getting the impression she's planning a black widow thing and that's why she's putting up with this creep
caffienatedconfetti: EWEWEW
caffienatedconfetti: EWWWWWW
caffienatedconfetti: WHYWHWYHWYWB7JHG
thenightetc: oh my god
caffienatedconfetti: "THIS SEX SCENE SPONSORED BY IMAGINE PEACE"
thenightetc: it's the ringtone they use for those "turn your *** phone off" ads!
caffienatedconfetti: ALSO THAT ACENT WHY?????
caffienatedconfetti: AUUUGUH
caffienatedconfetti: IS HER NOSE STUFFED WITH COTTON
Jalaperilo: "oh i phones you during sex? let me keep talking to you'
Jalaperilo: a billion???
thenightetc: "a billion dollars"
thenightetc: What a nice round number?
Zephra85: oh god stop already
Zephra85: these cut aways hurt
Jalaperilo: "youre all fired"
thenightetc: So they make uh........ database software I guess?
thenightetc: Please let that be foreshadowing
thenightetc: what.
Zephra85: this movie is making my soul hurt
Jalaperilo: hahaha!
thenightetc: Her shirt
Knockout: Shoot me.
thenightetc: why this.
Jalaperilo: no can do. primus/unicron demands we suffer
Zephra85: f*ck what they want
caffienatedconfetti: I WISH FOR DEATH
Zephra85: SAVE US PUFFERFISH
Jalaperilo: i wonder what this films agenda is?
caffienatedconfetti: PRIMUS YOU ***
caffienatedconfetti: oh right forgot about that lol sorry
thenightetc: I thought he was going to reject the pitch, he kinda had the look of a guy who was slowly realizing he'd been invited to a multi-level-marketing pitch
Knockout: The pufferfish loves you and would help you if it could.
caffienatedconfetti: "save the planet, bitchfaces"
caffienatedconfetti: was there just a festival in town and they were like "sure lets put that in the movie"
Zephra85: I buy it
thenightetc: [insert joke about Smokescreen]
caffienatedconfetti: also didn't they say it was winter????????
caffienatedconfetti: so many questions
Jalaperilo: you can find the answers within
Zephra85: oh god what the hell
thenightetc: Did they edit in the middle of a sentence
Cardinal: ((That's a great thing to hear on a date
Cardinal: (("You sound like my mother"
caffienatedconfetti: HELLO
Knockout: I like the man with the metal detector.
Cardinal: This is the part where the birds eat them, right?
caffienatedconfetti: I CANT HEAR YOU OVER THIS WIND
caffienatedconfetti: ALSO THAT IS VERY CONVINCING DEAD BIRD
thenightetc: "Don't touch it! It's fake!"
Zephra85: Give the fake bird an oscar
caffienatedconfetti: it's the best actor in this film tbh
thenightetc: That's not retirement, it's a sabbatical
Zephra85: STOP SAYING RETIREMENT
Jalaperilo: it sounds like an interview
thenightetc: I was just going to say
thenightetc: It's shot like one too
caffienatedconfetti: please kill me
thenightetc: *total silence*
caffienatedconfetti: i'm sorry for suggesting this it was a mistake
thenightetc: Suffer with us.
caffienatedconfetti: this movie in general is a mistake
caffienatedconfetti: also where is the birdemic? where is the shock and terror?
Zephra85: yeah seriously can we get to the plot already
thenightetc: oh god
caffienatedconfetti: end emeeeeeeee
thenightetc: That bit right there
Knockout: There's a persistent, gentle disgust. Close enough.
caffienatedconfetti: did they hire a black guy to dance and pretrend to sing in front of a mic
thenightetc: Maybe it's karaoke
thenightetc: God, the restaurant is totally empty except for them, isn't it
Zephra85: this movie couldn't get the licencing for a single song so they had to write their own
Zephra85: it's just as disappointing as the rest of the movie
Knockout: This movie's taken something from me I can never get back.
thenightetc: I'm sure there's plenty more disappointment in store
caffienatedconfetti: your soul?
Knockout: Oh, please, no.
caffienatedconfetti: OOOOHOHOOH JESUS GOD
Knockout: Dear Unicron, no.
thenightetc: Why is the tv on
caffienatedconfetti: NONONPOE
caffienatedconfetti: EW NO
caffienatedconfetti: STOP THIS
thenightetc: Hey uh if you wanna skip past any of this I'm sure none of us would complain
Zephra85: isn't this the same room their friends were getting their bone on
thenightetc: I don't know, is there that IMAGINE PEACE sign on the wall?
Zephra85: Oh right my bad
Knockout: GAAH!
Jalaperilo: ***
Zephra85: WHAT THE HELL
caffienatedconfetti: MY EARS
thenightetc: uhhh?
Jalaperilo: i fell asleep
Zephra85: I BET YOU'RE NOT ASLEEP ANYMORE
thenightetc: This is.... sudden
caffienatedconfetti: are those kamikaze birbs
thenightetc: And unconvincing
Jalaperilo: *** myheart
Zephra85: HOLY F****
thenightetc: How are they doing that
Jalaperilo: i think im dying
thenightetc: Birds don't do that
caffienatedconfetti: wow look at those graphics
caffienatedconfetti: so realistic
thenightetc: Pictured: physics probably
caffienatedconfetti: i could just reach out and touch them they look so real
caffienatedconfetti: RAWKRAWKRAWKRAWL
Zephra85: plot twist: no sex happened, they just fell asleep making out
caffienatedconfetti: wait what
caffienatedconfetti: battery is dead.... in a landline?????
thenightetc: They could have, like, started the movie here
Jalaperilo: my chest hurts
thenightetc: Why do the birds hate them in particular though
caffienatedconfetti: yes but then we'd have missed an hour of environmental preaching
Zephra85: yeah that's gonna stop them from breaking the glass and getting through the top part of the window
Knockout: Just look at them.
Jalaperilo: we should have watched The Birds instead
Zephra85: Srsly
caffienatedconfetti: we could do that next time, it'd probably get the bad taste out of my mouth
caffienatedconfetti: "hello stranger thank you for letting us inside your home"
caffienatedconfetti: oh god
thenightetc: No, I think it's a hotel
caffienatedconfetti: clothes hangers
caffienatedconfetti: why
thenightetc: oh my god
Zephra85: wait
Zephra85: this looks familiar
Zephra85: just this one part
caffienatedconfetti: i'm so sorry knockout i made a grievous error
thenightetc: That's the only animation they made for them
thenightetc: So they have to use it a lot
caffienatedconfetti: forgive me
Zephra85: ... Knock Out did somebody send this to you at some point as a submission? But like, just this scene?
Jalaperilo: thats what you get for suggesting a film you havent seen lol
Knockout: That would make sense.
thenightetc: They weren't even attacking, just hovering
caffienatedconfetti: forgive meeeeeeeee
Zephra85: WHERE THE HECK
Knockout: The bird noises are upsetting Impact's cats.
Zephra85: WHERE DID THOSE GUNS COME FROM
thenightetc: You mean you don't carry a gun with you everywhere in case of bird attacks?
Jalaperilo: from any atore in murica?
Jalaperilo: *store
thenightetc: seems legit
thenightetc: haha is that a machine gun
thenightetc: dude don't gesture with the goddamn gun
Zephra85: they're not the kind of guns people just HAVE though
caffienatedconfetti: o hello dead dude
Jalaperilo: i dont know how gun ownership works. can you tell
Zephra85: most unrealistic part part of the movie: a kid willingly sharing his video game with his sister
Jalaperilo: ha!
thenightetc: Nothing about, like. Calling the police or something?
thenightetc: Just, "oh well these are our kids now"
Zephra85: phones aren' working still I guess
thenightetc: jesus, what
Jalaperilo: grim
Zephra85: I feel like I should start drinking heavily in hopes of getting black-out drunk and forgetting I ever saw this movie
thenightetc: "welp, he's dead, guess all this stuff is free"
thenightetc: So I guess it's apocalyptic now?
caffienatedconfetti: idk
thenightetc: why are they eating out in the open
caffienatedconfetti: i made a grevious error
thenightetc: I don't think that's what bird flu does
Zephra85: 'good thing I have this dollar-store mask to protect me'
Zephra85: oh dear god
Jalaperilo: no, the birds are just dicks
Zephra85: you'd have to get a whole pig in your arms to match this kind of ham-fisting
thenightetc: ikr
Knockout: "Orthologist."
thenightetc: "the birds know I'm an ornithologist :)"
caffienatedconfetti: i am so sorry
thenightetc: You should be.
thenightetc: some dude in the background just walking on the beach
Jalaperilo: time for caffinated to go to the virtual time out corner to think about what they've done
Knockout: "Pretty good at ***?"
caffienatedconfetti: *sobbing*
thenightetc: I heard it too.
thenightetc: I think it was supposed to be "shooting"
Jalaperilo: that made me laugh
Zephra85: oh wow
Zephra85: okay
Zephra85: w o w
Knockout: Point the gun in his face some more.
thenightetc: That was... fast? DId she accidentally shoot her
Knockout: Yes. "Accidentally."
Zephra85: 'I didn't do anything' isn't very trustworthy first words
thenightetc: Just hovering menacingly
thenightetc: Like some vast, predatory bird
Zephra85: HAAA
Jalaperilo: *clapping for the furmanism*
thenightetc: *whistles*
thenightetc: Are they just... shooting at the bus with a machine gun
Zephra85: Nice furmanism
Zephra85: HAH
thenightetc: ...What
thenightetc: Do we want to know aht that was
Zephra85: so... a bird exploded, and instead of blood and intestinal tracking they were covered with... vomit?
Jalaperilo: gtg. i'm past my limit for bedtime lol. have fun suffering without me x x x
Knockout: Run, Jalaperilo human. Run far and fast.
Zephra85: Be free, Jalaperilo!
Jalaperilo: i will. and I will memorialise your sacrifice in poetry
thenightetc: Hahahaha they're just gonna
thenightetc: drive off without paying
Zephra85: ... it exploded
Zephra85: okay that's it I'm drinking
thenightetc: The birds have missiles now
thenightetc: "bought"
thenightetc: hahahahah
caffienatedconfetti: its gettin late and i have school tomorrow
caffienatedconfetti: sorry icannot stick around and continue to suffer
thenightetc: You wimp
caffienatedconfetti: well i mean
thenightetc: You brought this upon us and now you're leaving?
thenightetc: *judgey stare*
Zephra85: I feel like I have to see this through to the end now out of spite
thenightetc: *so much judgement*
Zephra85: YOU WILL NOT BREAK ME, MOVIE
caffienatedconfetti: look i'm not dealing with this fallout
caffienatedconfetti: they're almost to the treehugger scene and i can't
caffienatedconfetti: nooooo thankee
caffienatedconfetti: just gonna mosey on outta here
thenightetc: Boooooo
caffienatedconfetti: maybe change my name
Zephra85: Bye!!
caffienatedconfetti: great now i feel bad
caffienatedconfetti: look i didnt know the movie was THIS boring
caffienatedconfetti: btw nice ponytail
Zephra85: (blinkblink.blinkblink)
Knockout: *Scene missing*
thenightetc: ...*Are* those... redwoods?
caffienatedconfetti: lol nope
caffienatedconfetti: "not enough water"
caffienatedconfetti: *running stream in the background*
Zephra85: ..........
caffienatedconfetti: fine i'll stay\
caffienatedconfetti: despite my tiredness
thenightetc: That was like. A clip from a documentary or something wasn't it
Zephra85: w h y
caffienatedconfetti: jngkmjnredkvm zzzzz
caffienatedconfetti: wait what
caffienatedconfetti: mountain lions?
caffienatedconfetti: redwoods?
thenightetc: "Mountain lions can't climb trees!"
caffienatedconfetti: in the same place?????
Knockout: Congratulations, caffienated human. You stayed awake and now Treehugger will visit you in your dreams.
Knockout: Every single night.
caffienatedconfetti: please forigve
caffienatedconfetti: i am so sorry
thenightetc: *CGI fire*
thenightetc: so real. much danger.
caffienatedconfetti: how threaned i am
Zephra85: Nobody is ever allowed to give Beast Wars's CGI flack AGAIN
thenightetc: behold the folly of man--did the fire cut out just before it changed scenes
caffienatedconfetti: KILL ME I DESERVE IT
thenightetc: Your punishment is watching this movie
caffienatedconfetti: I HAVE BROUGHT NOTHING BUT SUFFERIIIIIING
thenightetc: It's only like 13 more minutes
thenightetc: And it's probably going to be 10 minutes of credits with the same music snippet looped forever
Knockout: In Birdemic time, that translates to three hours.
Zephra85: oh nooo our bf's are dead
thenightetc: Uhhhhh
Knockout: I choked on fuel.
Zephra85: she's still moving and breathing
thenightetc: But I thought she died out in the field
thenightetc: After whatshername discharged a weapon in her general direction
caffienatedconfetti: FACE CUT = DEATH
caffienatedconfetti: LOOOOGUC
Zephra85: different girl, those two from before were random strangers they met at the hotel
thenightetc: Ohhhhhh, right
Zephra85: these were their two friends from the beginning
caffienatedconfetti: end my life
thenightetc: Forgot about that
Knockout: How could you forget Imagine Peace human?
Zephra85: BUT THERE'S NO FISH TO CAAATCH BECAUSE GLOBAL WARMING KILLED THEM AALLLLL
thenightetc: ...That also explains why he's surprised by what's in the van, I guess. It was their van and they're dead
thenightetc: Well I ASSUMED she had more than one shirt
caffienatedconfetti: inskifb ukvgm
caffienatedconfetti: let's eat seaweed
caffienatedconfetti: its clean
caffienatedconfetti: probably
thenightetc: just eat some seaweed off the ground
Knockout: That beach looks polluted.
Zephra85: now for a ham-fisted monologue about over-fishing and polution and mORE GLOBAL WARMING
caffienatedconfetti: where did they get ball?>????
thenightetc: haha just plop the whole thing right in a pot of water
caffienatedconfetti: cooker???
Zephra85: ... sooo you're not gonna gut it or prep it in any way first
thenightetc: don't gut it or anything
caffienatedconfetti: what is logic
Zephra85: okay then
thenightetc: "...YOU eat it first"
Zephra85: MOST REALISTIC PART OF THE MOVIE
caffienatedconfetti: eewwwwwww
thenightetc: Pfff, so much for birds only attacking people in cars
Zephra85: in the face of the apocalypse kids complaining that they want junk food
caffienatedconfetti: RAWKRAWKRAWK
Zephra85: WAKAWKAWAK
thenightetc: Ha, he's only NOW run out of bullets
Knockout: I'm sure it would have been healthier than the ungutted fish and seawood they found on the ground.
Zephra85: sRSLY
thenightetc: A happy meal? Oh yeah, probably
thenightetc: Are they.... going back for the fist
thenightetc: *fish
Zephra85: 'We're murdered all but these four humans, our work is done'
caffienatedconfetti: winged murder raptors have never been so nonthreatening
Zephra85: those child actors look so bored
thenightetc: "...oh no they're coming back, BACK TO THE VAN"
caffienatedconfetti: nice giraffee neck human dude
caffienatedconfetti: oh NOW i canm go to bed
caffienatedconfetti: i have suffered enough
thenightetc: But the credits :)
Zephra85: I think we've all suffered enough for the sake of all existence
caffienatedconfetti: thank you
caffienatedconfetti: again, i am very sorry
thenightetc: Ooooo!
caffienatedconfetti: knockout
caffienatedconfetti: why
Zephra85: Because you obviously didn't get enough birds, Knock Out
thenightetc: Dirty bird.
caffienatedconfetti: what????
caffienatedconfetti: fat birb
caffienatedconfetti: wait what
thenightetc: *growing suspician*
caffienatedconfetti: oh
caffienatedconfetti: um
caffienatedconfetti: oh dear
caffienatedconfetti: this is 1000x better tho
thenightetc: Well
Zephra85: oh my god
thenightetc: This is amazing
caffienatedconfetti: wait what
caffienatedconfetti: did they..... did they nail a whole chicken to a tree?????
Zephra85: oh god I laughed really loud with that last one
Zephra85: I think so
caffienatedconfetti: kncokout look up the parrote sketch, monty python
caffienatedconfetti: *parrot
Zephra85: THE PARROT SKETCH
thenightetc: Fantastic choice, Knock Out; it makes up for the entire movie.
caffienatedconfetti: this si human humor at its finest
Knockout: Whatever helps us all to heal.
Zephra85: the first time I heard this sketch it was an audio only
caffienatedconfetti: its very british
Zephra85: so it was like a radio play
Zephra85: it played out perfectly
caffienatedconfetti: also john cleese is in it so it's already amazing
thenightetc: oh my god
caffienatedconfetti: POOOOOLLLY
Zephra85: I would have no desire to touch and put my mouth near a dead bird
caffienatedconfetti: you can't prove you didn't do that with starscream's corpse
caffienatedconfetti: WAAAAAKE UP
caffienatedconfetti: SLAP
Zephra85: EX PARROT
caffienatedconfetti: he's so bitish i love him
thenightetc: But... how.
caffienatedconfetti: because
caffienatedconfetti: oh dear thee goes the fourth wall
Zephra85: the fourth wall is overrated
caffienatedconfetti: why this
caffienatedconfetti: why thios so good
caffienatedconfetti: GET ON WITH IT
Zephra85: classic
caffienatedconfetti: 10000/10
Knockout: Beautiful.
Knockout: A much better note to end on.
caffienatedconfetti: think of it as my way of making up for my crimes
caffienatedconfetti: noiw if you'll excuse me
caffienatedconfetti: my bed is calling my name
thenightetc: Goodnight!
Zephra85: yeah I need to stretch myself out a bit
Knockout: Good night. Enjoy a mostly-guilt free sleep!
Zephra85: thanks for the stream Knock Out!
Zephra85: Say high to the family for me!
caffienatedconfetti: oloolololo thanks knockzo
Knockout: My pleasure! Thank you for enduring it with me.
Zephra85: I feel triumphant that it did not break me
caffienatedconfetti: do owls seem less scary now
Zephra85: 'Night everybody!
caffienatedconfetti: or more scary
caffienatedconfetti: because they are, in fact, birbs
caffienatedconfetti: heuehehue
caffienatedconfetti: lol nvm
caffienatedconfetti: just joking around
caffienatedconfetti: bedtiiiime
caffienatedconfetti: night
0 notes