#dont read into it too much im just rambling some stuff on mind
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supersoftly · 8 months ago
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My mom was telling me she remembers from her childhood that they were still receiving American condensed milk rations post WWII, and her younger brother was only just a little too young to remember that before it got phased out. They really pushed in public schools at the time to "finish your plate or you don't go home", which now is considered almost fiendish, but at the time, where a country had just barely survived and was doing it's best to avoid mass starvation, it was law that probably saved more than hindered.
It just reminded me personally as someone who is lucky enough to be outside of war that I think we forget how difficult life is even after recovery; the country and its people are still there, still growing and living and trying to get back to a sense of normalcy, even after being exposed to the deepest depths of human cruelty and suffering. War feels like the blade that keeps cutting away, even after it's over, yet we all have to deal with the consequences of the choices of people who may no longer even be alive anymore. And it's not like my mom is super old either, it was just how things were, especially in rural Japan where a new house on the block was considered a big event.
Recovery simply just doesn't happen overnight, it happens in each generation with what we give and take, and also with what we choose to leave behind. If we only choose to carry the burdens of the past to lay at the feet of the future, expecting them to carry it, where are we going but only towards a future where children will always bear the responsibility of our cruelty and evil? Is this really the path towards a future where we raise up and support the human experience to a much grander scale, where we minimize the suffering of all innocent people and work together towards something better than what we had prior? I want to believe in our vast interconnectedness, people find each other closer than they ever did before on an unprecedented scale and this is what will raise us up as a human race, simply communicating with each other as the necessary step towards real peace... And I really haven't changed my mind, even with everything going on, with the lies, the propaganda, the control of information... People still actively choose not to pass on hate as their sole inheritance, even when hurt beyond understanding, there is deep resolve and courage in those who continue to choose love when the rest of the world permits otherwise.
This ramble really didn't have a purpose in mind, just thoughts rotating in my brain, and I suppose putting clearly to words why I'm grateful as a hafu that both sides of my family chose love when they easily could've blamed each other given the circumstances. And I know some people will always believe and vocalize that my family made the wrong choice in the grand scheme of things, but for me, the simple happiness of being here today, having the time to just exist alongside my husband and my children, is a joy that keeps stoking the fire to a thankful heart.
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cathalbravecog · 1 year ago
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wait hold on frostbite is (part) cog??? did I hear that right?
if so can I throw a pie at them will they be fine
frostbite isn't part cog - they ARE a cog. they were built to look like a toon to be like a spy toon (by brian, actually) but things went wrong and they rebelled and now do goofy things while having to like.. PRETEND to be a normal toon or like - not let others know they're actually just a cog when around other toons (that aren't a part of their club)
but with other cogs they usually care about this less, but they gotta trust em more before they 'drop hints'. though they are stupid and reckless as hell and probably a lot of toons know they're a cog but Don't Care.
anyways! they have two types of hp! their normal cog hp and their toon laff! once they go sad and are damaged in that state the cog damage they take starts to show and actually does something. but also, even at full laff when attacked with heavy gags it will still do notable damage. but like, fruit pies and such might not do much. think of it as cartoon logic - the amount of damage they take depends on the situation or whether or not it's funny. also they're almost always overcharged as this thing lowkey has an oil addiction
like...its mORE COMPLICATED THAN THIS and has MORE THOUGHT IN IT but i dont feel like over explaining rn.
ANYWAYS TO ACTUALLY ANSWER YOUR QUESTION: a pie, yeah they will be fine. just annoyed and take like a tiny bit of damage that goes unnoticed probably. hey fun fact they tend to violently act out. Run.
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spoopup · 10 months ago
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realised ive never posted my timeskip pearl design ideas here ..!! i wanted to wait until i did some more but ill just post them now since i made them a bit ago now. None of these r final because my minds constantly changing ! maybe posting these will motivate me to make some more
errmm my rambles under the cut!!!
disclaimer i have a bad memory so i dont remember much of what pearl was like after the timeskip (i played SOJ in august and i didnt get to play the DD dlc where she shows up i think) (i also dont think about SOJ that much) so im going off what little i remember and also making my own stuff up👍! sorry if my pearl lore is off in general
i wanted to make a casual outfit for her eventually because i feel like as she grows and gets more freedom to do things and makes more friends she’d develop more interests outside of spirit channelling. i think she’d still be a spirit medium and stuff but she’d find interests in other things. i also think pearl would spend some time with iris and would visit her sometimes to get to know her , i like the thought of iris teaching her how to braid her hair too! i also think that pearl would like cute accessories a lot , so i gave her some small stuff like hair clips, cute socks and a pearl bracelet(which was a gift from trucy, in my head)
i made these because i dont really like pearl’s timeskip design, it doesnt feel like much effort was put into it. in my frog opinion. and also her having the hair bead (unsure if it has an actual name) on a small strand of hair at the front has always annoyed me i feel like that’d be very annoying for pearl lol .. again none of these r final because im indecisive !! thank u for reading my rambling \(^_^)/
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sleepiestwizard · 3 months ago
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okay im gonna put all my thoughts about the hotguy zinethology on here based on the incoherent ramblings my friends received while i was reading it
(obviously spoilers below the cut)
okay so first of all the first part was SO fucking funny i cried laughing multiple times
the first time i saw cute guy i SCREAMED
HOTGUY TRYING TO GET CUTEGUY TO JOIN HIS UNION AND GRIAN JUST GOING. NAH. WAS SO FUNNY
@cornpapers draws scar SO pretty
mumblr is SUCH a funny name 10/10
the "dont you think cuteguy and hotguy having matching names and outfits is queerbaiting" post is SO FUNNY
THE GRIANVERSE
SHE'S HERE !!!!!!! ARIANA GRIANDE !!!!!!!!!!
THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY. GRIAN LOOKS LIKE THE SAD HAMSTER
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REALLY GOOD PANEL
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this whole comic was so funny i loved it loved the cub
THE EMAILS PART WAS ALSO SO FUNNY
this is such an interesting and fun way to tell a story i loved the email part
in general the posts and stuff were SO funny and very realistic for the internet 😭
yeah
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grian desperately trying to not let scar reveal his identity 😭😭 girl (this also hits so different now after reading the whole thing btw.)
the comparison to a wild horse in this first fic also killed me
i can't really put a lot of images but there were some really classic superhero comic looking panel that i thoroughly enjoyed
scar tangled in his own grappling hook. classic. very funny
I LOVED THIS FIC SO MUCH. scar voice this is gonna ruin the tour. grian voice what tour. scar voice the world tour.
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scar saying he's playing volleyball. haikyuu reference!?!?!?
just putting this here
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LOVEDDDD THIS GEM DESIGN
moon mask i immediately called pearl yes pf course
GRIAN REFUSING TO SHOW EACHOTHER THEIR IDENTITIES AGRHRGRHRVH
"you and your cuteguy" arggrgrhsggrgrhgr
murder camel REAL !!
I DIDN'T TRUST THIS FOR A SECOND. PEARL AND HER SOUP I DONT BUY IT
"i cant believe you guys fucking killed jimmy solidarity" <- actual message i sent to mochi
SCOUR KNOWING SCARS NAME. AGRHSGRHRGRHV
i literally had to Go Take A Walk after this fic
i really like how the pearl thing was resolved in this it felt like such a good act 2 reoccurring villain exit. very superhero comic/movie like or even dnd like
'vincent berger' made me laugh
ZEDDIT
MOCHI FIC !!!!
first off every single fic has SUCH a cool cover i love them all
poor grian has ptsd :((
i LOVEEE how mochi writes angst always they're so good at it
the fact that he never found jimmys body immediately made me call the fact that he wasn't really dead and would come back btw
gem would lovee to drive grian slowly crazy tbh
"IVE COME TO PICK UP MY BIRD" AGRHRGRHGRHRVRBTBJRG
JUST LOOK AT THAT GREAT BIG BEAUTIFUL TOMORROW !!!!!!!
i was going insane at this point
this whole zine had me feeling like that meme thats like first i laughed.. then i serioused (the first part was SO funny and then golden era was psychic damage /pos)
IMPULSE :D
GEMPEARL <33 they are so everything to me
SCAR WHY WOULD YOU LEAVE SUSPICIOUS POSSIBLY EVIL FOREIGN TECHNOLOGY ON YOUR BODY. SIR.
NOT THE DESTIEL MEME
they look SO fucking cute
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both scar and grian look sooooo scrumptious in this comic argh
THE MIND CONTROL. THE. RHE MIND CONFNTOL.
THESE 2 FULL PAGES ARE ABSOLUTELY SO INSANE. I WAS AND STILL AM FOAMING AT THE MOUTH
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THIS IS SO. GOD THIS
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THE WAY GRIAN JUMPED AND SCAR JUMPED AFTER HIM. THEYRE CRAZY !!!!!!!
THE WIPING THE BLOODY NOSE AND THEN SMILING LITERALLY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!
HE TOOK THE MASK OFF
mumbo <3
THE HUG. ☹️☹️☹️
great big beautiful tomorrow :((( the parallels :((
GRIAN BEING TOO FLUSTERED BY SCAR KINDA FLIRTING THAT HE DIDN'T REALISE HE WAS DROPPING HINTS ABT HIS IDENTITY WAS SO FUNNY
cutiebird..
scar playing w his hair when cuteguy was hurt :(( so cute
REALLY FUNNY
THEY'RE HOLDING HANDS ☹️☹️
the tcg voice: theyre holding hands.. i want them dead
SKIZZ !!!!
ETHO !!!!!!!!!!
awhh skizzly :((((
THIS IS SO UPSETTING
"It's our Impulse, Gem" IM SO UPSET SHUT UP
god the way she puts on the mask and immediately is emotionless im gonna throw up
OBSESSED. THEY'RE EVERYTHING TO ME
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im so obsessed w this cuteguy i love him
grian voice omg im the only bitch serving cunt in this place im so embarasseddddd
they are serving SO much in this comic
ETHO EYHO ETHO ETHEO
SCAR APPOINTING GRIAN AS LEADER. EARURGRHVRH THEY'RE EVERYTHING
READING THIS WAS SO CRAZY IT LITERALLY FELT LIKE WATCHING ENDGAME
JIMMY SOLIDARITY !!!
MUMBO JUMBO !!!!!
impulse thinking about skizz as he's dying :(((((
HE DID IT ALL FOR SKIZZ :(((((((((
i was so upset this made me sob like a baby
SOUP GROUP :(((
SKIZZLY!!! :(((
warden :/
SCAR PEARL INTERVIEW :( HOTGUY RETIRING :( I LOVE THEM
THE CHEMICAL MUTATING PEOPLE IS JUST ESTROGEN BEING A GIRL JUST DOES THAT TO YOU
grian and scar playing volleyball is that a haikyuu reference....
OH THIS PEARL IN THIS COMIC IS REALLY GOOD
cuteguy is so spiderman coded
GREAT BIG BEAUTIFUL TOMORROW !!!!!! WE'VE COME FULL CIRCLE !!! SOBBING !!!!
god all in all this was so crazy. it was such an obvious labour of love and everyone who was involved with it did such a good job and obviously put so much love into it AND IT WAS WORTH IT !!!! insanely good work thank you to everyone for doing this and sharing it for free?? @hotguycomiczine y'all are crazy. incredible work <333
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gofishygo · 2 months ago
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mito mito mito hihi 😋
i’ve been having some thoughts n i felt like sharing w the class newayssss
so i was having bubble tea earlier and i started thinking,,,,what cod characters would like it? i feel like price def wouldn’t,,simon wouldn’t mind it but he does def think its too sweet and proper tea is superior and blah blah blah (i acc don’t know im kinda divided on that like i hc him as a sweet tooth but bubble tea,,,ehhh i feel like he wouldn’t like it all that much like he’d be all grumbly about it,,, idfk
johnny and gaz i think would like it lots ,,
i also think alex wouldn’t like it abd farah would (i js like hc farah as this secret softie ok leave me alone 😞)
but THAT got me thinking,,,, what other food preferences would they have ?? i think gaz would rlly like sushi (saw a fan art of him on a sushi date w the reader and i forgot who made it but ):$/:)/&!:!!!!! it was so cute) and i also think gaz would handle spicy food well ?? and he would like seafood in general methinks (tryna think of some select seafood items he wouldn’t like but im drawing a blank bc im vegetarian shusbssjnsuen)
idrk ab simon and johnny and price,,,,,,out of them 3, i feel like simon or johnny would have the biggest sweet tooth (they’re on like completely dif ends of the spectrum character wise but shh i js know it) but they all eat A SHIT TON like the food could be burned or too salty or smth but if they’ve js come back from a mission then they’re eating that shit UP. and asking for seconds. and thirds. they would still give u food feedback if it’s some other day tho
also johnny is extremely passionate about haggis. no i have never tried it yes i js know he is ok moving on
KONIGGGG hmmmm,,,, i have no fucking idea lmao i think? a lot of german cusine involves bread and stuff,,,so……………i think he’d have rlly bland meals idk
i’ve been rlly into keegan lately but i cant come up w anything for him aaaa
also gaz would be the only one who knows how to use chopsticks. the others would learn fast being in the military and all but gaz and chopstick skills js make sense???
ANYWAY im soso sry for rambling sm lmao this is a lot of words,,,,,and this isn’t a req by any means !!! js needed to hear ur thoughts bc food is js calling to me like “ok but would blank character like this” like. urgh. ok im done now i think but yeah food preferences for cod characters of ur choice
ALSO !!! THE IOS SHARK STICKERS REMIND ME OF U,,,,,look at them$:!!;&:!3 OK IM ACC DONE NOW BYE BEY MITO HIPE U DONT FALL ASLEPE READING ALL THAT
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AHHH hi weebun !! ^^ i was literally having bubble tea with my sister like a few hours ago and when i checked the inbox n saw this i BOLTED !! sorry for never responding to this, i forgot inbox existed..,
notes: shittily wrote as this as a warmup/just general yap :> sorry for messiness and incoordination.., platonic, no warnings !! unless ur lactose intolerant idk
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so you'll be jus chillin w the 141 on base and then say something like "boba is absolute gas shits better than normal tea" and of course, since the majority of the taskforce is british, you get absolutely fucking jumped for it. like- keep in mind, you say this price, the NUMBER ONE TEA AND BISCUTS DEFENDER, so you do end up getting toilet duty for a week with the explanation of 'uncordial behaviour.'
but after your deployment, you are the one to arrange where the 141 meet up. it's a little ritual you guys have developed to stay connected in between missions, one that makes your friendship seem a bit more real. sometimes the only thing that keeps your eyes open and heart pumping. and since you're an absolute fucking menace, you ask if you can meet around the heart of london- and then drag them all into the nearest bubble tea store you can.
-
price... doesn't end up liking it. takes a total of two sips, nearly chokes on the pearls, and then sets the cup down. he claims he's been around long enough to know that this- like many other foods, is probably some 'trendy millennial bullshit that'll disappear in a solid few', but that doesn't help ease the insane side eye that he gets from the cashier.
but to your surprise, ghost seems somewhat okay with it. his face doesnt really change (from what you can tell- his mouth is still hidden due to some face mask he put on), but he seems neutral, relaxed, even. he mutters something along the lines of how it isn't too bad, but it doesn't beat a cuppa- to which you chose to ignore, and how he'll probably just stick to having an earl grey in the mornings. but a few months later, you catch him at the same boba store, and you cant help but giggle to yourself.
soap fucking inhales the drink. its genuinely concerning, to say the very least. he seems to like.. unhinge his jaw like some kind of snake, and then inhales the whole drink in what you think is a millisecond. and since he's the only scotsman on the team- thinks the whole 'tea n biscuits' ritual his colleagues have is utter stupidity, so not only does he now FREQUENTLY drink boba because he likes it- he also drinks out of utter spite.
gaz is the only one with a seemingly respectable opinion about boba, unfortunately. he's had it before, multiple times- it appeals to his sweet tooth and is the occasional treat after long missions. but unlike you, gaz does not value peace, and seems to keep egging soap on in chugging unreasonable amounts of the drink. (and he doesnt mention it, as he does not want to face the same punishment as you did, but he thinks that bubble tea is sometimes, just sometimes better than his cuppa.)
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masterlist (some of my other stuff is better promise)
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islandofsages · 10 months ago
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darling heart.
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summary: in which you are someone who participates in/identifies with jirai kei culture.
characters: heartslabyul boys x gn reader
tags: relationship not specified, fluff, imagines format
warnings: mentions of mental health, mentions of self-destructive tendencies
author's notes: hiiii this is very self-indulgent bc i am a jirai kei babe,, im specifically a jirai danshi <3 i might do for other dorms too, depending on my motivation lol you can find out more by searching up jirai kei tho dont just read the jfashion wiki for it, it's more than just a fashion style. also beware of potentially triggering stuff since it deals with mental health and all
Riddle Rosehearts
He’s intrigued by this subculture that you participate in and he’d ask you more about it, if you don't mind telling him - he’ll do his own research too anyway
When he finds out it's basically a subculture consisting of people with emotion dysregulation issues and is generally controversial, he checks up on you and asks you if you're okay or not
You laugh then – you’ve had your ups and downs but really, so has everyone. You hope reading about it hasn't scared him off
He’d feel like calling you a “landmine type” is too insensitive but you assure him that there's nothing to worry about and that people who participate in the subculture has reclaimed such stereotypes and fully embrace it
He’d really enjoy seeing you decked out in jirai kei fashion; he may want to try it himself but he’d insist that it's not in his place to participate, only support from the sidelines
You do get him to try out clothes that are similar to or inspired by the culture though – he seems to be comfortable in the style and you're happy that something that you enjoy can also bring the same joy to him
You’ll also recommend some songs to him, especially ones that you think would help him in studying despite the sometimes concerning lyrical content
If someone tries to bully you for identifying with the subculture, he’d step in immediately and defend your honor
“What right do you have in deciding what (Y/N) identifies with? That's what I thought. I’m always in the right.”
Through your downs and ups, Riddle will always be there for you.
Ace Trappola
He has heard of it before but he thought it was only a type of fashion, not a whole subculture with more substance to it than clothes
You’d infodump to him all about it and your journey with it, whether you just discovered it or have been identifying with it for a long time – he listens to you curiously all the while
He’s caught off guard for a moment by the more controversial and depressing part of it but he quickly recovers
He’s happy for you and glad that you’re comfortable having such a culture define a part of you
Though he implores not to do all the self-destructive stuff if you could and he’ll look out for you more just in case
He definitely thinks you rock while wearing your jirai kei outfits; it’s not his style but he wouldn’t mind trying it once, just to get a feel for the style
“Yeah, this is definitely not my thing… you, on the other hand, look pretty awesome.”
You’d give him a link for your playlist (or a playlist you’ve saved) and he’d listen to it when he’s bored – ends up adding a few songs to his personal playlist
If he finds anyone stereotyping you unnecessarily, he’ll call them out, saying as if they’re any better
Despite everything, you are still uniquely you in his eyes.
Deuce Spade
He apologizes for not knowing too much about it when you bring it up and you tell him it’s okay because it gives you an excuse to ramble about it
You tell him what it entails and how you’ve come to find out about it, sifting through your past experiences both good and bad
He tries very hard to be understanding, even if he doesn’t really get it. You’re just grateful to have his support
“I don’t really get it but it gives you a sense of community, right? I think that’s pretty cool!”
He’s also a little concerned about the mental illness part so he’d regularly check up on you to make sure you’re doing okay
He’d ask you to tell him more about your experiences with the subculture if you have any more and if anything exciting happens, you go to him first
Such as acquiring a brand new article of jirai kei clothing for example! He thinks the style is super pretty and fits you really, really well
He’d listen to the music together with you, sharing earphones and all – maybe he would even listen to them while he tries to do anything
He’ll be your guard dog and bite back whoever dares to make fun of you for being part of the subculture’s community you’ll have to calm him down sometimes
You couldn’t ask for a better cheerleader than him.
Cater Diamond
He’s always known about the subculture and although he doesn't participate in it, he thinks it's really neat
You tell him more about it and about the misconceptions people have about it so that he doesn't misunderstand
He’s super stoked that he knows someone in real life who actually participates in the subculture since he gets to see how it actually is in reality
He mostly knows about the fashion and when you come rocking up to him wearing the classic jirai kei look, he tries his best not to fanboy
He compliments you then proceeds to ask you where you got it – though cute styles like it aren’t his thing, he feels like he can give this style a try
He’d match with you on days he doesn’t feel too uncomfortable with more cutesy styles and snap pictures of you two to post on Magicam
He’d also go scouring for the music online to add more songs to his already rapidly growing playlist. He’d share some recommendations with you too!
Unintentionally got you more jirai kei friends since some people saw his posts about matching with you on Magicam; even people you already know commented on his post
“Look at us, (Y/N)! We’re totally Magicam-famous now~”
You laugh with him, head thrown back while the seeds of your relationship bloom behind where the two of you sit.
Trey Clover
He doesn’t know too much about it so he’ll ask you to explain to him what it is – to which you excitedly agree to
You tell him everything from the origins to how you’ve come to participate in the subculture – he nods patiently all the while
The mental health part of it has him questioning you a bit but he has no ill intention, he’s simply looking out for you and is worried about you
He’s supportive all the way and thinks it’s nice that you have something you’re passionate about. He’d even do his own research when he has the time
He’s pleasantly surprised when you show up wearing jirai kei fashion one day; he definitely thinks you look striking in the get-up
He wouldn’t mind going with you if you were to shop for more jirai kei-related things – he would joke you’ll have to repay by helping him out another time though
He’ll listen to your song recommendations and if he likes them enough, he’d listen to them while he’s in the kitchen. He likes that they remind him of you
“Oh, this one’s pretty catchy. …These lyrics though…”
Going places with you certainly catches attention sometimes but he doesn’t mind, as long as you’re happy and comfortable in your own skin
His name truly defines him – you sure feel lucky to have him in your life.
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Text
Hello Everypony :3
finally doing one of these, lol
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💙About me!💜
Welcome to my blog for,,, everything! No sideblogs around here we die like men/j
My name is Oliver, but you can also call me oli! (ive got other names too, but that's the main one, check my pronouns page for the whole list!)
Xe/Void/Fox/It/They pronouns but get silly with it, i dont mind!! (except she/her)
We're a system! We dont talk about it a lot but sometimes it comes up yay!!
important post you should read!
Other important post to read before interacting with my content!!
I write and draw tho i am better at writing, lmao
@inky-drawings is my lovely girlfriend whom i love very much<333
@azamonvoid is my sib from another crib whom if i dont see soon heads will start rolling<3
@lmanburgseulogy SUPER AMAZING person (cough im copying part of the intro from bug), also my twin o7
@willthemicrowave AMAZING DUDE. Tem you're super cool
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❌DNIs❌
cc!Wilbur and/or cc!Dream Team supporters. If i ever post about them its the characters.
-> also, if you see me reblogging from someone who supports them, please warn me!
Anyone who engages in discourse, esp syscourse. I do not care, let people live. Any interaction about it will be ignored and/or deleted. This isnt the place for it.
People in poppytwt/blr. I understand some people write it or engage in it to cope, but it personally just makes us uncomfortable. Thank you.
Just in general hateful people. Transphobes, terfs, homophobes, misogyinists misandrists ect ect. It is not that hard to leave people alone, and if you can't, get out.
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✨ (main) Fandoms!! ✨
Hermitcraft/Life series!! My faves are Grian, Etho, Impulse, Zed, Jimmy and Mumbo (not in that order)
-> i engage in shipping the characters, quite a lot,,, if it makes you uncomfortable this ain't the place for you lol
DSMP! my mains are sbi (especially twinsduo you will always be famous to me,,,,), and sometimes feral boys!
-> i dont care most of those people are problematic now, my au just took a general outline of the smp then rewrote everything. There is barely any connection w/actual canon
SCU/Slimecicle cinematic universe!! Blame @alliumsmybeloved for this/j
Hollow Knight! Quirrel, Hornet, Hollow and Ghost are my faves!
-> nothing much other than i hate the traitor lord with a burning passion, lol
and many, many more!! Including percy jackson, portal, ect - these are just the ones im hyperfixating on the most lately!!
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⚠ Terms and conditions? ⚠
I'm ok with flirting but ask first just to be sure!
autistic silly little guy. Sometimes i get too much, feel free to tell me if i exagerate and get weird!
-> be nice about it tho, please,,,
send asks send asks!!! They're so silly i love em<333
i do take requests on doodles, headcanons, snippets ect!! It just takes me a bit sometimes to answer!
I have a dsmp/hermitcraft/qsmp/ect au im working on, my magnum opus/j, go check it out it's @the-caladrius-au RAAHHH
I write about the characters, never the ccs.
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💬Tag guide!💬
#Oli talks! -> silly tag for everything of mine, rambles,art, writing, reblogs (sometimes,,,)
#shift talks! -> like the above but for shift, one of our other alters :3
#Will talks! -> I think you get where I'm going with this
#Olis faves -> fav posts and/or posts i want to look back on!
#Oli writes -> pretty self explanitory, for when i write :3
#Oli draws -> for my art n doodles!
#Mutuals my beloveds -> Moot tag!!! For asks or when i talk with/about my mutuals! (if i forget to put it in a post with you, feel free to tell me!)
#nonnies my beloveds -> anon asks
#Beloveds! -> posts about/with @inky-drawings and/or @azamonvoid
#higgs Field au and #HFAU -> posts about my dsmp x Hermitcraft rewrite au
#the multiverse system -> stuff about our system!
#the horrors saga -> the horrors,,,,,, I just wanna write,,,,
#Twinsduo crumbs -> any and all Twinsduo content because I'm normal about them (lie)
#sillytick -> tag for @cao-tick ::3
#dr.dejekyll -> tag for @genocreative / @hydehydejeykll ::3
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-> if i forget to tag things properly feel free to remind me!!!
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[plain text under cut]
Hello Everypony :3
finally doing one of these, lol
💙About me!💜
Welcome to my blog for,,, everything! No sideblogs around here we die like men/j
My name is Oliver, but you can also call me oli! (ive got other names too, but that's the main one, check my pronouns page for the whole list!)
They/It/xe pronouns but get silly with it, i dont mind!! (except she/her)
We're a system! We dont talk about it a lot but sometimes it comes up yay!!
important post you should read!
I write and draw tho i am better at writing, lmao
@inky-drawings is my lovely girlfriend whom i love very much<333
@azamonvoid is my sib from another crib whom if i dont see soon heads will start rolling<3
@lmanburgseulogy SUPER AMAZING person (cough im copying part of the intro from bug), also my twin o7
@willthemicrowave AMAZING DUDE. Tem you're super cool
❌DNIs❌
cc!Wilbur and/or cc!Dream Team supporters. If i ever post about them its the characters.
-> also, if you see me reblogging from someone who supports them, please warn me!
Anyone who engages in discourse, esp syscourse. I do not care, let people live. Any interaction about it will be ignored and/or deleted. This isnt the place for it.
People in poppytwt/blr. I understand some people write it or engage in it to cope, but it personally just makes us uncomfortable. Thank you.
Just in general hateful people. Transphobes, terfs, homophobes, misogyinists misandrists ect ect. It is not that hard to leave people alone, and if you can't, get out.
✨ (main) Fandoms!! ✨
Hermitcraft/Life series!! My faves are Grian, Etho, Impulse, Zed, Jimmy and Mumbo (not in that order)
-> i engage in shipping the characters, quite a lot,,, if it makes you uncomfortable this ain't the place for you lol
DSMP! my mains are sbi (especially twinsduo you will always be famous to me,,,,), and sometimes feral boys!
-> i dont care most of those people are problematic now, my au just took a general outline of the smp then rewrote everything. There is barely any connection w/actual canon
SCU/Slimecicle cinematic universe!! Blame @alliumsmybeloved for this/j
Hollow Knight! Quirrel, Hornet, Hollow and Ghost are my faves!
-> nothing much other than i hate the traitor lord with a burning passion, lol
and many, many more!! Including percy jackson, portal, ect - these are just the ones im hyperfixating on the most lately!!
⚠ Terms and conditions? ⚠
I'm ok with flirting but ask first just to be sure!
autistic silly little guy. Sometimes i get too much, feel free to tell me if i exagerate and get weird!
-> be nice about it tho, please,,,
send asks send asks!!! They're so silly i love em<333
i do take requests on doodles, headcanons, snippets ect!! It just takes me a bit sometimes to answer!
I have a dsmp/hermitcraft/qsmp/ect au im working on, my magnum opus/j, go check it out it's @the-caladrius-au RAAHHH
I write about the characters, never the ccs.
💬Tag guide!💬
#Oli talks! -> silly tag for everything of mine, rambles,art, writing, reblogs (sometimes,,,)
#shift talks! -> like the above but for shift, one of our other alters :3
#Will talks! -> I think you get where I'm going with this
#Olis faves -> fav posts and/or posts i want to look back on!
#Oli writes -> pretty self explanitory, for when i write :3
#Oli draws -> for my art n doodles!
#Mutuals my beloveds -> Moot tag!!! For asks or when i talk with/about my mutuals! (if i forget to put it in a post with you, feel free to tell me!)
#nonnies my beloveds -> anon asks
#Beloveds! -> posts about/with @inky-drawings and/or @azamonvoid
#higgs Field au and #HFAU -> posts about my dsmp x Hermitcraft rewrite au
#the multiverse system -> stuff about our system!
#the horrors saga -> the horrors,,,,,, I just wanna write,,,,
#Twinsduo crumbs -> any and all Twinsduo content because I'm normal about them (lie)
#sillytick -> tag for @cao-tick ::3
#dr.dejekyll -> tag for @genocreative / @hydehydejeykll ::3
-> if i forget to tag things properly feel free to remind me!!!
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emerxshiu · 8 months ago
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i forgot it was april fools lol. i definitly did not end up sprinkling in a bunch of memes in there, nope, not at all.
I havent checked my dashboard until a few minutes earlier, but now im booping everyone i find in there, its just so damm fun! its kinda sad that its just for april fools, i wish the booping stayed forever like its way too silly i love it.
Oh yeah the drawing yep aight. So uh, i had the idea yesterday and this looks NOTHING like what i had planned, it was just going to be a plain white backgroung, and i was trying to make it look like a pencil sketch (kinda). and simple coloring. but i had a lot of problems and drawing this ended up being really frustrating but im kinda happy with the result even if it difers so much from the og idea.
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also here is a clean version (aka no memes)
i tend to change my idea as im drawing so after i realized this was not going to look like i thought, i tried some effects and i came up with the idea of making it look...off.
Backgrounf with saturated colors consisting of red and blue and a fecto elfilis who looks rather dreamy, wich is totally not kinda inspired by isolated isles and high school musical 2 believe it or not (im confused as to how that was present in my mind as inspiration but i guess anything works as a reference) and contrasting with the darker background from how light and glowy i made him.
Fun fact: when i drew elfilis here, they were reminding me of a bunny, so you could kinda count this as a bit of an easter post since im probably going to forget to do something for that.
fun fact 2: this image is based on a fanfic im writing right now, i havent posted it yet, and when i do im pretty sure i'll put it into the Anonymous collection, since what im writing is very different from my usual, i tend to write about my splatoon ocs or sometimes about kirby characters, most of these fics tend to be general with not a lot of archieve warnings and stuff (save for one but that one was very very tame and just had an implication of a character dying at the end) and they're oneshots, most of them, this one is also a oneshot. i just enjoy writing that, but its a little bit....how to say it? bloody, i just have like the start made and its probably going to take me a while to finish, im also thinking of reading it multiple times since most of my works are usually just the first draft. but uh since its quite different and has that im quite scared of the reception it might have when i post it, in fact a lot of times i dont post stuff since even tho i know i shouldnt worry about others, i still do like an idiot, i just cant help caring about what other people think of me. and yeah basically its just not like the usual fluff i write.
next post might be splatoon related since im redesigning some ocs i had, or it might be princess peach showtime because my father got me the game and im loving it
Thank you for listening to my unnecesarily long rambles and Jambuhbye!
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yonpote · 7 months ago
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sorry i dont have anyone to talk to this about lol so it's going in your inbox but i'm in my mid-20s and only now for the first time in my life have i changed my mind on rpf specifically because of phanfic. i'm a returning phannie but like.... the last time i watched them was all the way back in 2012. and was very ani-rpf then and have continued to be through the years. and i think in a lot of cases i maintain that position. but after falling back in love with dnp and the phandom and caving into the urge to read some phanfic knowing that dnp themselves encourage and respect it im kind of shocked to find it's actually a really beautiful, metatextual, interactive creative outlet. i think youve talked a bit about how phanfic isnt really rpf to you and i kind of agree, because dan and phil to me are like.... an idea, a mythology, a narrative, that theyre aware of and have built as well as being aware that we're aware of. like the idea of dan and phil has been constructed by them and their fans hand in hand for over a decade. and i find that phanfic itself is very aware of this and exists to expand upon those ideas. lol. yeah that's it sorry for this ramble. i just find it surprising that something could change my mind on that in this day and age but it's been a very cool experience.
hello welcome youve come to the right place for this yap because i COMPLETELY understand you. like genuinely i am not this attached to any other "rpf" content like this? ok i had an egobang phase but honestly arin and danny have grown to share a similar but not exact same connection as dnp BUT I DIGRESS
but yeah i think a lot of it is due to the contrastive relationships between the brand of Dan and Phil™, their separate individual brands Daniel Howell and AmazingPhil (particularly dan), the Phanon dnp, and the actual real people dan and phil. i always go back to the fanfiction segment of tatinof but its just such a perfect example of what i mean. like, the entire idea to have a fanfic scene was ofc the real people's idea, and they used tropes they would see in the phanon to convey the audience interactive story, but at the same time had to keep it at least Somewhat appropriate for the Brand™ at the time being very pre-teen and teen focused. honestly idk how much you've gone back and watched of what you missed, but i would suggest doing that not just cuz theres some incredible stuff from those eras, but also seeing the intersection of the brand, fanon, and real people and when they split apart. you see it a lot especially in gaming videos imo where theyre unscripted, and once they got more comfortable in the gaming channel roles the energy shifting away from Brand but never too far... until ofc now where what even is their brand anymore just Chaos and Queerness i guess
OH ALSO go read some old fic and compare to newer ones like its not just that writing styles changed or that dnp themselves have changed, but the like. energy and intent put into fic has changed. i would say in the past it was more exploratory, putting dnp in AU's and imagines, or exploring what Could have happened. whereas now, yes ofc there are au's and fic for the purpose of exploring a concept or world, but also its a lot more introspective. exploring the inner world a bit more. idk i just thijk dnp are funny lil guys and they accidentally created some freaky lil creatures in a lab somewhere...
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darkdemeter · 3 months ago
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Dem Hi! I'm back with a bit of an unhinged ask here:
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Im sure this doodle gives you an idea where this is going. I was just making myself some tea, and I was thinking about Lovers In Eden (i was going to listen to a song called Eastward of Eden by Amelia Day,hence the association). And Since I am a film student, a writer and i took script classes as my subject las trimester, i offer you this unhinged recap of my conspiracy theory. So LIE (Lover in Eden) introduces us to the idea that Strife killed Y/N after a bloodlust outburst,right? Well, at first i didnt think too much of it, but then the chapter ends with the four on earth, which felt a little disembodied from the prologue. Which brings me to the hipothesis which is: Strife's lover is on earth,reborn without their memories. My proof for this theory is this: 1) We know that in the darksiders universe there is such thing as a well of souls, we know they go through the kingdom of the dead to repent and then be reborn through the well. 2) you wouldntve put the line "Love slayer" if it wasnt relevant to the plot. (Writing often times includes phrasing things a certain way to hint at other things). 3) Why would you close the chapter where you did? What relevance does the fact that the four are now on earth have? Simple, Strife will find a reborn,survivor Y/N and will fall in love with them (and have a crisis once he realizes its a whole like soulmates finding eachother again situation) 4) and last (which came to me as i wrote this) if you were to center the story only on Strife and the reader without the reader being reborn, you wouldve just started it from the medieval age/wherever strife met the reader and not end with the four on earth. Of course dont gotta tell me if im right,dont want to spoil the whole fic anyways. But I felt the need to share this with you. (I genuienly felt like the pepe silvia meme). And yeah, one offshoot of all this is that maybe the reader isnt a reborn soulmate, and that the prologue could just set up this inherit guilt and fear towards love that Strife has. Until we get the next chapter, i lay in wait...scheming/lhj/hj Have a nice rest of your day and i hope you've enjoyed my unhinged ramble. -Jer. PD: i feel so silly for sending this whole thing but as a fellow writer i know theres nothing we love more than ppl theorizing about our stuff. So here you go. I hope it doest read as overbearing,i just genuienly love your stuff.
First off, I love your pepe doodle! It’s so perfect. In fact I find it so funny that I made this a little bit ago myself... (As much as I'd love to rant and such about my AUs' lore and headcanons, I made this for shits and gigs)
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I absolutely adore hearing theories readers have about my fics. (Sorry this has taken FOR-EV-ER to respond to, I'm terrible with replying at times)
I also fucking LOVE that you're a film student, I think that makes this whole theory situation even better because I do tend to have a very movie-esque thought process when writing. (Blooper reel and BTS footage rent free in my head)
And I think I've got the mind stewing a bit with that recent post, Flowers From My Lover. Without hopefully giving away anything, you do have some valid and interesting points in your theories and has me going, "Oh Jer is good little detective." You get a cookie for your theory skills!
There are indeed certain key details and clues I put in on purpose and it's so interesting to see what readers pick up on. And yes, the well of souls is involved to some extent in this plotline, but not in the way you might think...
I also find your choice of the word "reborn" interesting. Very obviously and right out the gates, I will say that yes, reader is alive in this story. But it's the manner in which reader's alive and again, the reborn theory is interesting and again, possibly not in a way you're expecting. Though it seems rather simple, I will tease that there is... quite a bit more to it than what's at face value.
And I wanna tease this little clue too because it is one of my favourites: It's interesting how the fic's title has a double meaning in plain sight...
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timeregistry · 12 days ago
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omg dude i love ur sebastian!!!
and if u want, i’ll tag u when i post my painter design
i’d also like to hear more of ur ramblings about pressure or anything of the sort :3
have a good day!!!
TYSM!!! I'm glad people like him 🥹He's been my everything since I got into Pressure, let's just say that the AU of my fic had lived in my brain since forever before I started writing LOL
OH and also I would ADORE to see your Painter design PLEASE 🙏🙏🙏 I LOVE PAINTER SM I LOVE ALL PAINTER DESIGNS
ALSO sorry for answering this so late I got injured (again...) and it was hard to write but also I’m INSANE like IM CRAZY you literally put on a silver platter that I can talk about ANYTHING like DUDE. IM CRAZY. I jump around fandoms a lot so to say that I have a lot on my mind apart from work is an understatement (let's just say earlier I went crazy about regretevator...... it's bad)
SO to organize my thoughts, I've been really wanting to actually talk about like... some thought process stuff of my fic (A Human's Touch) and things that happen before the fic... since SO MUCH happened but I don't mention it because we are put at a specific moment in the story... VERY VERY Sebastian and reader focused so TW: Sebastian Solace 😔
Under cut because its LONG. LIKE. REALLY LONG. I HAVE TOO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT LMAOOOO
SO pressure's lore is a MESS don't get me started on how I feel about the current lore so I decided that since no one really saw the timeline or pretends it doesn't exist as they should, I feel it's a bit unlikely Sebastian would be able to convince Painter to start killing people after meeting it TWENTY MINUTES PRIOR T_T (and hacking all of Urbanshade network in that time?!) so that's why I actually made (in chapter 7 that is not on tumblr rn LOL) them meet. I mentioned in a comment on AO3 since someone had asked smth about Sebastian and just to give an idea, the start of A Human's Touch happens a couple of months before the events of Pressure. SO at that point, Sebastian and Painter have known each other for months. I would LOVE to go into detail how I see their relationship is when the lockdown happens + what happens with reader but I DONT WANT TO SPOIL ANYTHING T_T so maybe when I finish the fic I'll go into detail as I'm not actually really planning on writing the actual like.... events of pressure w/ reader instead I guess, idk how to put it, just to let you in a little secret, Painter does know part of Sebastian's plan when the lockdown happens in this universe.
So enough about Pressure lore and what I changed from that, I wanted to talk a bit about before the events of the fic... I didn't write it since I felt it would be very Sebastian and reader centric and since it was most likely going to be in a platonic sense I wasn't sure if people would be interested! To admit something since I don't imagine many people will read this but originally I had written a fic that was with Sebastian (it was more romance with him tho as I was down HORRENDOUS I wrote so much Sebastian y’all have no idea I got jumpscared trying to find some of my old things to reference and seeing the sheer amount of Sebastian) which was actually where the original summary of A Human's Touch came from HELPPPP LIKE ORIGINALLY IT WAS A PARAGRAPH OF MY FIC I JUST EDITED IT T_T I never post what I write I'm surprised that I even posted A Human's Touch but I digress. Anyways I had originally considered writing a platonic version of that fic (not like that one was finished) but in the end I never did since again, I didn't think anyone would read it--
Either way, here is a TLDR of how reader and Sebastian met. Basically reader came in as an intern to Urbanshade right? How I imagined it was that they actually had seen Sebastian when he was still in his big ol heavy containment aquarium. While I think he still needs to go there when Urbanshade wants to contain him, I imagine reader met him when he was MOSTLY in there... While he could leave as his status as an MR-P made it so that now he could leave and free-roam, I imagined that he never really saw a reason to do so... I think atp Urbanshade hadn't really found a good reason for him either, as he was soo unpredictable because of how aggressive he was with them. SO they just leave him in his cell basically, its good to see if there were any longer terms effects of his… condition. He would normally just look into the window and look at any of the scientists.
Now how I imagined his heavy containment cell was that like, an aquarium. Like there is this big window where you can see him but I imagine that he had this like area at the surface of his cell that there is like a walking area but it was specifically because not only is he an MR-P so its like a little better than his old cell but also because he was exactly for an experiment that was to make humans be able to breathe over and underwater so I like to think they want him to take in oxygen naturally anyways–
MS Paint jumpscare but something like this
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ANYWAYS I imagine reader had seen him from the window that you can peak in from just him swimming around and being completely fascinated by him. Stuff happens, and they decide to try to see him without their superiors knowing so... I decided I would pull directly from one of my old fics:
You first met Sebastian fully at night, when most scientists were already resting in their own quarters. You were already shown where you would stay, yet you couldn’t get the image of Sebastian out of your mind. You wanted to meet him directly. He was the first of the subjects that you met, against all safety protocols and you remember he himself mentioning it. He was rude and in all ways, a certified asshole, immediately tricking you by making you walk a bit too close and effectively making you fall in his tank. He didn’t keep you there however, you knew he didn’t like your presence but you couldn’t resist wanting to learn more about him.
How I imagine reader's and Sebastian's relationship was just, a really rocky start because we have reader who wanted to know more about him and then we have Sebastian who didn't want to know anything about reader because they are just another scientist. He never left his containment either because I imagine that the other prisoners would give him funny looks and dislike his presence because of how he was. I think... he was very bitter. It took a lot for him to warm up as he did… Especially with someone who was one of the scientists! 
“You really don’t know do you?” Sebastian snarled slightly, his casual facade crumbling briefly as his expression went more of pity. “Of course you don’t, you keep coming in here as if I can’t kill you right here and now.” You frowned at him. “I’m here to learn-” “You are trapped. They have you right where they want you. The moment that you have served your purpose they will kill you.” He put a claw near you, his other hand flaunting his sharp nails. You took a step back, sensing danger unconsciously. He noticed, his trained eyes on you like a predator. “Word of advice, start making yourself useful and leave me alone.”
I always saw that reader was treading on treacherous waters... always seeing Sebastian secretly at night and after talking with him, he would eventually warm up because whether he liked it or not, I think he was lonely. Because he would live without speaking with anyone and talking to someone who's a lot more genuine... I don't think the reader is like the other scientists at all, I don't think that it would even be known what Urbanshade was doing! I think Urbanshade just flaunts a lot and doesn't hide anything, but makes any new interns or hires go through the longest paperwork part of their work EVER to see if they are dedicated before kinda forcing the unethical experiments... basically like roping in with mundanity and beauty, the curiousity on how these beautiful sea creatures are made only to find out that it was all done with torture--
SO my point is that reader didn't know what happened to Sebastian, nor knew why he was so standoffish, they were forced to do ONLY paperwork and their free time went into seeing the subject that they can see very very easily. It was like... just the curiousity of what Sebastian was, what he was capable of, etc etc. I don't think reader even knew that he was... human. And he doesn't mention it either... I think he only mentions it soooo much later... As for Sebastian’s side of things, I imagine he decided to entertain the reader only because atp he’s thinking he can probably use their naivety for his escape!
ANYWAYS to skip ahead because I have JUST SEEN THE SHEER LENGTH OF THIS IM SOOOO SORRY I LOVE LOVE TALKING ABOUT MY CREATIONS IDK lore dump moment
So at one point, Urbanshade notices that reader is interacting with Sebastian, however, instead of like, stopping them, I imagine that Urbanshade instead saw an opportunity. Sebastian doesn’t talk to ANYONE so suddenly finding out that he’s talking to someone??? 
It was only much later that he actually warmed up to your presence, choosing to follow you around when you were stuck doing your boring paperwork. You were starting to regret applying here as they wanted to wait a really long time until you could actually do any hands-on work. However, Sebastian’s presence made the situation a lot more bearable, as he would sometimes read over your shoulder and mention things that you would outright forget to write down. Because of his seeming attachment to you, your higher-ups completely changed your temporary job of reading and copying down paperwork into instead… still do the same thing but also look over Sebastian’s behaviour. They would say how you were the only person that he got along with, which meant it was the opportune moment to find out more about him and fill his file even more as it was severely lacking apparently. And so started your Behavioural Scientist job with no hiccups whatsoever. Especially not after begging Urbanshade not to let you go after the internship ended, convincing them that you were the only person who managed to get even remotely close to Sebastian’s good graces. No issues at all... 
OH and at some point reader is given their own office and it’s because they had a normal desk like other people before but because Sebastian is.. big… he would push the desks all the time and he would apologize to the scientists but you can tell he wasn’t being genuine as the malice was obvious on him SCREAMING but after having TOO MANY complaints about Sebastian following reader around and reader insisting that they need him to follow because it’s their job, Urbanshade just gave them a temporal office (that became their permanent office for years to come)--
I think it’s there where Sebastian starts seeing reader as a “friend”, they never hurt him and quickly realise that reader was genuinely not evil like the scientists that experimented on him. While Urbanshade made reader the behavioural scientist, they started working with other subjects as well (as you guys know) and Sebastian started seeing reader in a much more positive light. 
Reader goes on vacation sometimes, brings a lot of trinkets and pictures of the outside world to Sebastian. I think he tries to keep a strong face when he gets some of those things, he misses the outside world. I like to think reader asked him once what was his favorite snack and he would mention something from Chile and reader would get it for him and that’s probably the first time that he does cry in front of them because of the whole emotion of having something that’s basically a comfort food after so long. It was like a taste of freedom. Something to look forward to and not give up to Urbanshade. And seeing as how reader didn’t look disappointed or in any negative emotion I think that’s when Sebastian just completely changed his perspective. The idea where now in his grand plan of escaping the Blacksite that he had been making the moment that Urbanshade stopped doing the extreme experiments and let him walk (slitter?) freely now would include reader. 
While he knows reader is there for the other subjects too, he also knows that they are mostly there for him counting as I imagine there is a lot of subjects that reader can’t understand (like the angler… or pandemonium…) and while Sebastian knows a lot of them thanks to working with reader so closely (him reading all these classified documents) that he weights if he would escape the Blacksite he would want to take reader with him. I think at first when they met he was like they might die but its a sacrifice for his escape (they are but another scientist), but now he’s like if they die I die (“I have failed.”).
BASICALLY I imagine their friendship that is very slowburn but in the end they become extremely loyal to each other, reader doesn’t know that they are part of his plan now. I mention it in A Human’s Touch but Sebastian has this hidden room where he keeps all these things and he probably has written (in a coded language) a whole plan of his escape + what he would do once he gets out of the Blacksite. At first it only included him but the longer he spent with reader the more he kept in mine their safety as they are the only friend he’s had for years and they are ATTACHED. 
Oh and a final note, Sebastian’s bracelets were given by reader, but i wanted to talk briefly on the obsidian one because I went with spirituality and symbolism as to why I took that material… obsidian bracelets mean protection, grounding and emotional healing… a lot of mental clearance and transforms negative energy to positive ones. I like to think that reader got it for him after learning more about him, because just as he wants them to be safe, they want him to be safe too. Their biggest fear is that Urbanshade would want to experiment harder again with him again and/or kill him. Sebastian shares the same fear.
OK I think I am... done... I'm so sorry AGAIN if something doesn't make sense... feel free to send an ask.... That goes for anyone ofc but yes... I'm crazy but if you got this far here's a quick doodle I did for your troubles dear reader
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becauseplot · 4 months ago
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Still feel is one of my fav fics ever and it made me so happy to see more stuff from this AU! Your post-osnf headcannons are sooo good!! Actually im a big fan of your ordem headcannons in general tbh
If you dont mind sharing more on it...Can you maybe tell us a bit more about your ideas for the effects the symbol left on Thiago? Like, is he still connected to it or to Santo Berço somehow?? I find this consequences stuff really interesting and id be cool to hear more about it
Aw thanks!! I'm glad someone's getting some enjoyment out of my rambles <33
I can go a bit deeper, of course! Warning for the fact that this does get pretty sad and heavy, sorry :(
So Santo Berço really is gone. Equipe E destroyed it. The effects that Thiago is now dealing with are essentially mental scarring: a mix of normal human PTSD with a paranormal "flare" to it. The Symbol has seared itself not just onto his back but onto his mind as well. His dreams of the Symbol are due to trauma and the fact that, just as he suspects, he was never meant to escape it. It is stuck with him now. Anything touched by Death cannot go back to the way it was before, after all.
I kind of like to think about his mental state in terms of Ordem's "sanity" system as well. He recovers plenty of "sanity" while in injury recovery, since he's given time to rest, away from stressors. Eventually, he starts to do work for the Order again, but he quickly learns that he can't handle stressful, paranormal events like he could before (systems-wise, he has a permanent de-buff/disadvantage in the sanity checks) and missions---even the short one he starts out with---just put too much strain on his body. So, he winds up becoming part of the Order's cover-up team, helping fudge official reports and write up those "logical explanations" that Veríssimo sometimes references.
It's a role that's...much easier on him, after everything he went through. He does notice a pattern between his stress and the frequency of the Symbol dreams, so it's much better this way. He will, on rare occasions, help his friends out in the field with intel gathering (perhaps encountering a Horror on the way, which is never fun), and with he gets to serve as a sounding board for Liz's investigations, both her personal ones and the ones she does with the Order.
There are...other effects of the symbol. That he doesn't like to talk about. He's taken a sickly comfort in swirling designs, ever since he woke up in that hospital; back when he dealt with the nightmares on his own, before Liz and the others knew about them, he used to go to bed with reminders to himself ("Your name is Thiago Fritz, you live in São Paulo with Liz, she's in the bedroom upstairs...") written on his arm surrounded by swirls in the hopes they might calm him down enough to think and read it. He ponders his father's pocket watch more than he should, taking solace in the even, steady tick of time moving at the right pace as much as he does watching the second hand go around and around. He finds himself tracing circle after circle after circle with his finger when he's lost in thought or anxious about something...
He finds himself taking comfort in it. The Symbol. The thought makes him feel ill.
Over the months between osnf and opd, his mind slowly starts to deteriorate. Anything touched by Death cannot go back to the way it was before, after all. The frequency of the dreams has always been correlated with his stress and thus fluctuates, but on average they start to get more frequent, and the more intense ones happen more often, and it slowly gets worse, and worse, and worse until---
---he "zones out" one day, thinking of the Symbol. Thirty seconds, nothing much, it must just be on his mind. Then, he starts to fully disconnect from his surroundings, in his own head, pondering the Symbol for a minute or two. The white void starts to creep into his vision sometimes, reality losing meaning and definition, for several minutes at a time. Minutes turn to an hour, two hours, more, if no one is around to pull him out of it.
Thiago, as much as he hates to admit it to himself, is very, very tired. His mind and body are worn out, abused, overused. The thought that he's been living on borrowed time ever since Santo Berço comes more often than he'd like. At the worst of times, he feels like he's orbiting and closing in on some final, finite point. But he'll never tell his friends this because he knows it'll scare them because fuck, it scares him too. (Though, the times where it doesn't scare him are...even worse.)
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themouthwasher · 27 days ago
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sighhh, this is my selfship sideblog, for jimmy, i selfship with him
i guess you can call me LP, kinda like lp records lol, thatll be my nickname here, he/it pronouns, 18 years of age
taken by my beloved @swansuke (and jimmy too of course)
pleaseeeee check hidden theres some clarifications in there cause i know an account like this needs clarifications (plus a bit more random info bout me)
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PLEASE READ THIS!!!
yes i know hes a horrible piece of shit, i dont support his actions, i hate him, but my brain says fuck all to morals when it comes to stuff thats fictional and decided "hey this guy seems silly, im gonna fall in love now!" whenever i think of lovey dovey stuff i try to place it in a sort of au where he didnt do... all of that. but yeah, theres really no "good" way to do it is there? i get most people will see it as wrong no matter which way i try to spin it so just please block and move on if you have a problem with it
not particularly proud of the fact i selfship with him (if you couldnt tell by how ive been talking about it so far) which is reason i made this blog, im not gonna admit this to anyone else so i might as well make an account where i can love him anonymously, honestly i have quite a bit of internal turmoil over loving him but thats to be expected when its... him. expect random bouts of "i fucking hate this man he makes me so mad /srs" immediately followed by doting on him cause my brain hates me being happy
tldr; i dont support his actions and lowkey hate the fact that i selfship with him, but hey i didnt chose to fall in love (if i could chose this would be a daisuke blog just sayin)
a bit about me
uhmm ive got autism, adhd, and bpd, and i feel like that definitely all shows itself in the way i act, i guess i act pretty unstable?? im also a very paranoid person, over like, everything, idk what causes it but its basically the stereotype of what people think of when they think of paranoia, i dunno i think that pmuch sums up whats wrong with me
i draw sometimes, though i doubt ill post anything, and i like music a lot, its my spintrest (but ill try to keep music talk to a minimum lest anyone manages to figure out who i am by my music taste) other than that uhhh i guess i like horror and bugs, and i bet youll never be able to guess what my favorite game is
dont really have much of a dni? dont hate on me obviously, i wanna say proshippers dni but with the nature of this blog i feel like most of the people who would actually accept me are proshippers :/ id prefer if you guys didnt follow me if you were open about enjoying really problematic stuff but id be hypocritical to cuss you guys out, id say im an anti but at this point idc, if i have a problem with you ill just block and move on
speaking of not really having a dni, any doubles, if youre out there i guess, feel free to interact, although sometimes i do get really protective and jealous outta nowhere so do be warned
tag list!!! woohoo!!! this post is also tagged with all of em so you (or more likely i) can easily click on them and get scrolling
"💚 i can fix this" is my rambling tag, check that out to see me talk about how much i unreasonably love that man
"💚 tuplars copilot" is for fanart reblogs
"💚 kills 99.9%" is my misc reblogs tag, whether it be non fanart posts about jimmy or completely unrelated posts that i reblogged with him in mind
"💚 polle says" is my ask tag, just any posts where im answering any asks i get
"💚 lp draws" is any of my art that i post, couldnt think of anything creative for this one
"💚 chatterbox" is me either talking to other people or posting stuff that doesnt really have anything to do with jimmy (and the tags not a reference, how revolutionary!)
"💚 i hope this hurts" is things reblogged/posted with hatred or anguish in my heart, i mightve actually got seething mad at jimmy seeing/making those posts but bleh whatever its jimmy so on the account it goes
"💚 not safe for tuplar" i think im so funny, i wont be rebloging anything too extreme and ill try to keep post like these to a minimum, but thats just there if you wanna mute it i guess
"💚 favorite posts" is self explanatory
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honey-dandelion · 10 months ago
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Hello everyone !! My name is AD, 19 and my pronouns are she/her!! I am a multi muse, filipino roleplayer/writer!!
I am quite new to the rp community in tumblr so please understand that I'm inexperienced. This blog is mostly to find more reigen rp partners who can giggle and ramble with me about Ron Weasley!
Currently, i am into Harry Potter!! I’d like to preface and say I do NOT support anything JK Rowling has said (as I am bi myself) and any transphobic statements she’s made is something I will never agree with.
My current hyperfixation character as of the moment is actually Ron Weasley! He’s my favorite character by far and I can go on and on about rambling towards him :3 though he doesn’t have to be my main actually! Im looking for any Ron role players :D as long as I get to write ships or just in general, sweet stories about him.
I have a few set of rules i would also like to make as a seperate post but as of right now, i will be writing them here so please take the time to read them in case you ever want to write or just simply chat with me about anything!!
* Main muses are Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, Theodore Nott and Draco Malfoy! I can also do the Weasley family and can even do Ron as well if preferred!
* usually write on discord and prefer to have a server for all the rps. I draw, write and speed out ideas a LOT btw so please be warned. I'm a rambler and I really love Ron a lot and want to interact with people who love it or just generally love Ron as much as I do!
* I am a big romance shipper but I also love writing platonic relationships between characters! Like family found dynamics and such. I am also a rare shipper kind of gal- like shipping Draco and Ron sometimes LOL
* I write mostly romance for aged up/adult characters
* I can word vomit and write long replies a lot- it's how I usually write so please don't feel pressured to write the same length as me!!
* Via discord rp; PLEASE tell me if I write something that ever makes you uncomfortable- I can edit it out and such, I don't mind as long as everyone feels safe.
* I'm really biased with Ron. I can be ooc with him a bit so please do not attack me if you have any problems with my mischaracterization of him. I am only here to have fun and write, to indulge myself with people. I don’t mind ooc
* I have school and responsibilities from my parents so if I don't answer, I'm probs asleep, working or @ college
* Lasty; Dont be shy with interacting with me! I am always happy to make mutuals and friends around here! I would love to answer any questions- either in character or just questions you would want to know about me!! So please dont be shy :D
• FOR NSFW STUFF; PLEASE STOP HERE WHEN YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THE TOPIC. THANK YOU AGAIN.
• I usually just write doms/tops and I can get pretty hardcore with smut writing — please tell me if there is any kinks or stuff in smut you don't want to read! I also like dark topics but absolutely no adult/kid. That shit is not allowed in my rp blog. I'm very into some dark content and such but if that's not your cup of tea, please avoid the " DARK TOPIC // " tag.
• I only write nsfw of adult characters and ocs; cant do erp via me. I will only do them via discord as I am way too shy to write them publicly. PLEASE NOTE THOUGH that i will not just write on a whim. I will be able to make headcanons and such but i need to get to know you and feel comfortable enough to write it. I do write suggestive content here and there so my tags here will be " NSFW // " in case you ever want to avoid it.
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m0cachin · 1 year ago
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a vil piece i drew for a twst art nouveau open collab on twitter :] thank you to @/snailwonderzz for hosting it!!
rambling & thoughts abt this piece below the cut because i put a lot of thought into it
tbh my thoughts on this piece are properly expired because i did this MONTHS ago and its. its not as fresh as it used to be but here we go
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so i made this thing ^ for twitter because obviously i cant ramble there but the whole gist of it is there from the beta designs and everything, but something i didn't include in the picture above is my struggle with deciding what color the dress should be because i don't make thumbnails/colored sketch before like getting into lineart and coloring
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okay pic above is the options i had for deciding the color (ended up doing the one on the second pic, second from the left) it's a bit fun to revisit because this pic took 11 hours or so ibispaint says okay wait time to properly get rambling
i. unexpectedly put a lot of effort and thought behind this piece considering that its probably my first ever proper serious twst artwork...??? and its an open collab too so you cant not expect me to tryhard a little www but anyway. i do wish i could have done more but im impatient and i want to get this finished asap with how busy i already was with other stuff so as a result i didnt put much though in the backgrounds and just balled it but yknow what. its okay i like the end result, its nice to see and im glad to see that people like it too!! about the beta designs; im genuinely a big fan of like some of them but i knew it was going to be a pretty detailed (and draining) piece so i decided for something simple :] i did regret not putting any accessories in vil's hair though :( it completely slipped my mind until i was like .... halfway? through shading ANYWAY. i think that should be all? idk my thoughts are no longer fresh anyway so i dont have much to say now compared to back then but if you read this thank u . i put a lot of love and effort in what i do and i hope it shows through my art. hopefully i can draw more twst soon !!
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theblankest123 · 6 months ago
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WAIT WHAT DO YOU MEAN NEUROTYPICALS GET SHOTS OF DOPAMINE AFTER COMPLETING A TASK OR A CHORE????????????????
Like that's apparently an actual thing????? Fr???? What???????
Whenever im finished doing a chore i dont get like any satisfaction or a positive feeling at all from that, the only 'positive' thing about it is that i go from feeling terrible to feeling neutral at best like. I dont feel any satisfaction or happiness or anything after finishing a task.
Like right now i finally managed to get myself to throw out the trash because it was there in my room for too long and started to rot and smelled really bad. Threw it out. I got no possitive feeling about doing that at all no satisfaction or anything bit at least it doesnt smell bad here anymore.
I never get any satisfaction about cleaning my room like ever????
The only possitive thing about it is that it keeps my hands occupied when im listening to a stream or a podcast and dont feel like jist sitting there, i wanna move, hence why i dont mind sweeping the floor all that much as other chores,
But like i dont feel good or anything after im done with the task
No wonder this shit's easier for neurotypicals when you get a shot of dopamine for that
Man this actually explains some things about how i work and why i really dont wanna do some stuff when i dont see that much joy in the activity of doing it
Like rn with studying - im just tired as hell from studying and cant bring myself to do it at all when im alone, but when im with others and im reading it aloud/explaining it to them/ hearing their thoughts about it/just having them around and listening to them talk about whatever while i mark things down or underline it in my notes, it makes the activity so so much more bearable, because i dont get any rewards for it when im doing it alone vs it becoming a lot more engaging with others around
(Plus the fact that others are around makes them be able to hold me accountable and stuff instead of when im alone - noone can hold me accountable so like why cant i do a much more fun and engaging activity)
Do neurotypicals also get a dopamine shot after finishing studying for the day???? Or being finaly done with a chapter or something??? Is that a thing?? Because it kinda isn't for me at all....
Anyway im rambling at this point but the point still stands, i dont get a dopamine boost after completing tasks.
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