#dont hold me on that.
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"Who are you to tell me how to hold it!?"
Persian Izutsumi strikes again and I'm dragging Senshi down with her š¼
I really love the head pieces on the women in Persian miniatures of the iconic Qajar era (if someone knows what theyre called please let me know š) And I definitely want to keep exploring the different looks on Izutsumi
#delicious in dungeon#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#senshi#izutsumi#Persian izutsumi#my art#Really appreciated all the positive comments on the last izu post#made me so happy#They are holding Shish kebabs and I dont believe they are originally persian but my dad makes them a lot so theyre persian in my brain
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thinking about the way simon leans into you for a kiss like thisā he curls his hand around your throat, and he doesnāt really tug or tighten it, instead uses his hold as a leverage to push himself close to you, like he is sucked into your gravitational force, always orbiting. always tethered.
he doesnāt know how it is to not be with you.
and this kiss, just one of many, shows the attraction he always succumbs to. he holds onto you like the way one would clap their hands around a glittering firefly, snuffing its way out to force it to sparkle only for themselves, and folds himself close like he is about to whisper a wish.
the kiss becomes a prayer; it is his offering to you.
and when he pulls back, you see the way your lips had burned him, leaving him all pinked cheeks and twitching nose. you feel breathless at the weight of his adoration, his reverence, because simon looks at you like you are worth more than the flesh that holds you up.
you swallow, throat bobbing, and simonās fingers twitch on your skin. his hand around your throat feels like an anchor but you watch the way he still sinks into you.
#simon ghost riley x reader#i dont usually like those -holds their neck to kiss them- bc they tend to always tug the person being āchokedā#but the vision that simon just grasps you there to feel your humanity before pitching forward to you -not tugging you to him- makes me#breathless w need. its a visceral vision; i so want him to do this to me#suns
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no more fan-ta-sizing about it! everything's already changed~
#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#figueroth faeth#riz gukgak#adaine abernant#fabian seacaster#gorgug thistlespring#kristen applebees#fh class quangle#my! class swap thing! I guess this is like the poster for it now#got overinvested and finished it properly instead of winging it lol#in closeup order: cleric!gorgug; bard!riz; rogue!fabian; sorcerer!kristen; barbarian!fig; artificer!adaine#this one does have the harpoon gun I'd give fabian during sophomore year but literally only figured out for this piece lol#I like how it looks tho Im glad I hashed it out#thinking abt power armor adaine a lot tbh... she has the transhumanist audacity. she's villain-adjacent enough#to attempt unspeakable acts of body improvement#(its funny bc to wear a rig like that would Also demand a certain level of physical strength from you)#also yeah this is the thing with riz holding a megaphone that got me considering#its fun! it fits the aesthetics! maybe it'd grant him range for bardics#maybe he gets to keep that Im just not sure how he'd carry it around lol#fig gets to have all of her makeup... I like almost never remember to draw it usually kdsjfhdjk listen. I just forgor#I always forget makeup is real#also dont ask me what's in kristen's thermos it Is usually tea but you truly never know#sometimes its soup. it can be lighter fluid. soap perhaps. hot chocolate#also if u come knocking on my door abt kristen's somatic in this piece: I wont be home#she gets to be gross especially bc shes funny and 17yo and gay. we give it to her#okay I. whoo I should lay down. finally I can move on to other things#cheers! wahoo. yahha perhaps
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renaissance dogys
characters belong to @canisalbus
#i love i loveeee ludovica sm shes so cute. ive only known her for 5 min but i fell in love with her design and i love her friendship#with vasco ^_^ i think them having each other makes hiding their sexualities a little less lonely so thats sweet#ik in modern au shes considered an old friend of vascos but i originally assumed she and vasco fake dated in college or smth#to get their parents off their backs until they came out properly and continued to stay in touch as friends after LMAO#im not very familiar with period fashion so i had to look at renaissance costumes as reference. but i have to admit i love the#high waistlines used in some of their dresses.. i have a minidress with a similar high waistline pressed against the chest and sleeves#also if u squint machete is holding a little paper bag in the 2nd photo which is supposed to be his lunch courtesy of vasco <3#idk what ludovica would wear in modern au but i thought poet shirts might suit her because theyre like somewhere evenly between#masc and femme. to me anyway.. based on observation lesbians seem to love poet shirts and i think she looks good in one#these are all shitposts.. ill draw serious art of them one of these days i promise#i listened to fools rush in and it reminds me of them.. especially when it goes 'though i see the danger there / if theres a chance#for me then i dont care' like its so poignant and bittersweet.. a little indulgent when u think of those small moments they have togethr#save me gay catholic furries... gay catholic furries... gay catholic furries save me#my art#myart#doodles#fanart#others ocs#canisalbus#fur#furry art#machete#vasco#vaschete#ludovica#sfw fur#furry#anthro
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Whumptober 2023
Day 12
(@whumptober)
By - B.W
ā TWā
~ Swearing
~ Mentions of Abuse
~ Mentions of Injury
Enjoy!
ļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾ā
,ļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾āļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾ā
,ļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾āļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾ā
,ļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾ā
Karyme taps her fingers on her knee as she flips a page of her book with the other.
Insomnia. A familiar yet equally annoying condition. Even after dealing with it for years, it still bothered her.
She sighs, trying to rub the sleep out of her eyes to no avail. She then closes the book with a frown and tosses it aside.
She lays back on the couch, looking up at the dark ceiling.
She turns her head to the clock, which reads 2:16 am.
She runs a hand through her hair, closing her eyes. As she tries to find sleep, she moves uncomfortably as the pain in her stomach begins to increase.
She rolls over to the side, eyes shut tightly as she breathes slowly.
She hugs a pillow with her arms, burying her head into it. A creaking sound fills the quiet apartment, making Karyme open one eye.
She makes out the sound of footsteps. She closes her eyes again.
They get closer.
Karyme ignores them.
And closer.
She focuses on breathing.
They stop.
A hand slowly rests on her shoulder, surprisingly not making Karyme flinch back.
She looks up at Kaiden, who only sighs in response.
"Thought you fell asleep out here." He says softly.
Karyme shakes her head, mumbling into the pillow.
His hand moves under her chin, lifting her head out of the pillow.
"..you okay.?" He asks.
Karyme pauses, then slowly shakes her head.
Kaiden nods in response. "Your stomach is hurting again, isn't it?"
Karyme nods.
"Figured as much." He replies, helping her sit up. "It's been colder these days, that usually triggers the chronic pain."
Karyme is pulled into a hug, her head resting against Kaiden's chest.
"There's something else, right?" He asks.
"..yeah.." Karyme mumbles.
"Okay.. pain meds first, talking after." He says, slowly helping Karyme stand up.
He helps her to their bedroom, laying her down underneath the blankets.
"Bundle up, I'll be back in a minute." He says, leaving the room.
Karyme slowly adjusts herself so the blankets perfectly cover her. She closes her eyes, the pain still present.
A soft shake of her shoulder makes her eyes open.
"Here, take them quick.." He says.
Karyme downs the pills, a shudder running down her spine from the cold.
Kaiden tucks her in a bit for good measure, then joins her in the bed.
He slowly takes her in his arms, his head resting on hers.
"Are the meds helping.?" He asks.
"Mhm.." Karyme hums in response.
Kaiden sighs. "You know I hate seeing you in pain.."
"I know.." She replies.
There's a silence as they both lay together.
"..wanna talk about it now.?" He asks.
Karyme sighs, then nods.
"Whenever you're ready." Kaiden tells her.
"I think I had a.." She starts. "..no.. more like a.. memory.?"
Kaiden raises an eyebrows. "You remembered something.?"
Karyme nods. "I thought it was a nightmare.. but it triggered me to remember.."
"..what was it about.?" He asks.
"..it was all a bit of a blur.. but I was young.. still had those thick black glasses I used to wear.." She says slowly.
"My.. mom was there too.." She mumbles. "Her mouth was moving, but I only heard a ringing sound.."
"..i think I was crying.." She sighs. "Then my mom leaves, and.." She stops, her mind replaying the memory over and over again..
Holding her own head in her hands..
Pulling a hand away to see blood..
Graying in and out of consciousness..
...
And waking up in the hospital just in time to hear the doctor say, 'head trauma..'
She suddenly clutches onto Kaiden, shaking hard. "..i think she-.. she hurt me-"
Kaiden stops her, shushing her softly.
"..its okay.. you don't need to continue.." He says with a sign. "..never liked your damn parents.."
Karyme takes a shaky breath. "..you didn't like them at first because my dad wouldn't let you take me on a date.."
Kaiden smiles. "..right.. I was pretty persistent-"
"-and we ended up sneaking out together anyways." Karyme shakes her head in a playful manner.
Kaiden goes back to a serious tone. "..you're sure it's a memory though.?"
"Positive.." Karyme responds. "..i think that incident caused my.. bad memory issues.."
Kaiden sighs deeply. "..fuck them.."
Karyme snuggles up closer to him. "Calm, Kaiden.. Calm."
Kaiden rests his hand in her hair. "I know.. calm.."
As if on cue, Karyme yawns.
"Would you look at that? They're kicking in now for sure.." He says.
He adjusts himself on the bed. "Alright, it's time to sleep, and if you wake up.. please wake me up too, yeah.?"
Karyme nods slowly, eyes already half way closed.
Kaiden smiles. "Night, baby."
Karyme mumbles a small 'love you' back and promptly falls asleep.
When she sleeps, no memories pop up..
..maybe it's better that way..
ļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾ā
,ļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾āļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾ā
,ļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾āļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾ā
,ļ½”ļ½„:*:ļ½„ļ¾ā
#whumptober#whumptober day 12#whump writing#damn.#for once im not writing something half asleep#thats a shocker#but yea this was another fun boi to write#pretty simple but stioo enjoyable#alsooo my midterm grades are grwat so that means a stress free weekend#which means the posts might be better#or not.#dont hold me on that.#anywaysss that is all my friends#and as always#enjoy! :)
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You're the best, Moira !
#overwatch#overwatch 2#moira#moira o'deorain#sigma#siebren de kuiper#i like to think she has to hold his hand otherwise he'll float away#you can thank my wife for this because they basically gave me the idea#this is not ship art but i dont really care if you see it that way#CRYPTCOOP ART
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thank u canon plant nerd megumi for my life
bonus:
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiguro megumi#yuji itadori#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#itadori yuuji#megumi#yuuji#middle one FOUGHT oh my god#angle/arm position/watering can/expression NONE of it wld go right#took 2 hours to get the lines only to realize upon laying down flats that it was still Completely off#so i took a break to bake an entire cake came back n finally it started cooperating#tbh idk if im still shaking off ytd's weird funk or what but this took ages longer than it should have#but its ok bc florist/botanist/general plant nerd megu is free serotonin 2 me#i could not decide on one apron 2 give him#but then i remembered he is th type 2 take his hobby Very seriously of course he would own multiple#looks at the hydrangeas listen . listen I Know i ws bemoaning having 2 draw so many cursing their name etc etc#but u dont understand he had to be holding one he just had to. he told me so. he held a gun 2 my head and said U Know What To Do#and i said ok ok ok ok#there r only 2 i survived#and i wld do anything fr him as we well know . cuffs his jeans puts leaves in his hair <3#jjk may have given me trust issues depression anxiety etc but it Also gave me flowerboy megu and i think that balances it out :)#edit added the bonus here bc reblogs dont show up in the main tags enjoy itfs gross flirting mwah <3
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I know it's because they both have Issues TM but in retrospect it's a little bit funny that Donna is insecure about her place with The Doctor and wonders whether she deserves to travel the stars or is worthwhile as a friend while Ten is just sitting in the corner like "if I get separated from Donna I'm gonna explode the universe and then myself" and then he does.
#doctor who#tennant doctor#donna noble#donna: sometimes i dont know why hes willing to travel with me#ten: yeah lmao shes the thread that holds what little sanity i have left š#tenth doctor
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bro will master art just for her
#guys you dont know how much i love them#& this concept. really#i always loved drawing my crushes#even after i got over the last one i still hold the drawings dear to me#we'll see what happens when i get over my current crush haha#murder drones#md#md fanart#murder drones fanart#nuzi#uzi x n#uzi doorman#serial designation n#n murder drones#my art#fanart#hamo stop yapping in tumblr tag challenge impossible
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I just want to know you. You know me.
MATT BOMER & JONATHAN BAILEY as HAWK & TIM Fellow Travelers S01E01 āYou're Wonderfulā (all episodes)
#fellow travelers#ft spoilers#matt bomer#jonathan bailey#hawkins fuller#tim laughlin#tim x hawk#hawk x tim#fellowtravelersedit#perioddramaedit#lgbtedit#tvedit#userbarrow#userabs#tuserpris#usercoty#timhawkeps#*#/i wanna hold you if you'll let me/ SOB!!!!! im sobbing#dont flag this they're just wrestling
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sometimes you gotta lure your overly-studious ravenclaw gf into spending time with you š„° š ( from 'Every Teardrop is a Waterfall' by Kat_12739 on ao3, GO READ IT!!! the first story is about seb falling sick and still pushing himself/not admitting he's sick until he ends up in the hospital, the second story is about the birth of seb and clora's daughter and seb's reaction to clora almost dying in childbirth, and the third is about dealing with a fussy newborn lewisšš„¹THEY'RE SO GOOD AND SWEET AND SOMEWHAT SAD (not to mention beautifully written) so go check it out!!šš )
#READ SO I CAN YAP TO SOMEONE ABOUT THEMšš©š#the seb sickfic made me realize how much i needed barely functioning and sick seb (but him still trying to be tough)#theres also a part that cracked me up bc at one point seb is so sick he cant even see straight but he just thinks to himself:#eh its fine.... ill just ask ominis how HE functions without vision laterš¤· LMFAO#so stubborn...JUST LET CLORA TAKE CARE OF YOU MFERš¤ŗš¤ŗš¤ŗ#defs gonna be drawing more from it especially sick seb LMAO but also seb having a tea party with celesteš„¹š„¹#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x oc#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian x mc#hogwarts legacy fanfiction#sebastian sallow fanfiction#hphl#choccyart#also i was never planning on writing anything about clora giving birth or abt the kids so to be able to read it WAS AMAZING#THERES A PART WHERE SEB IS HOLDING CELESTE AND CRYING AT CLORAS BEDSIDE THAT I NEED TO DRAWšš#LIKE SRSLY seb being conflicted and not even wanting to HOLD celeste bc he doesnt know if clora is alive or not... IT WAS SO SAD BUT GOOD#i honestly dont know what seb would do if clora died in childbirth tbh.......i could honestly see him resenting celeste#esp since she looks so much like clorašš#LETS JUST NOT THINK ABOUT IT!šš#(still thinking about it)#like this line in the fic: āSebastian hesitated; if this was Cloraās last gift to him he wasnāt sure he wanted it.ā#šššITS SO GOOD UGHHHHHš TY AGAIN FOR WRITING THESEšIM SO TOUCHEDDDšš
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yuck!
#^he is holding in a kough#TRYING SO HARD TO PCIK UP AND FINISH OLD ABANDONED WIPS. I GHAVE SO MANY#DONT ātalk to me about anatomy. i do not care to learn it and u cant make me#idgaf if its small just open it ina new tab who cares anymore#wtf... art#one piece fanart#zoro#roronoa zoro
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icarus
#ādont forget what happened to icarusā. ough. ow. aough. Owwww OWWW#thry make me sooooo sadddd#Ughhh#the text says āwhats done is done/you know this isnt realā#i was thinking of the tweet talking about the portal incident and how ford remembered it wrong#(where he holds fidds in his arms)#and the two interpretations of it being him viewing himself as a hero and/or as him trying to lessen his guilt#so this was made with all of that in mind#idk why i felt the need to explain that im normal. Promise. normal enjoyer of details#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddauthor#gravity falls#felix art
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ur highschool bully gojo was chefs kiss š what do u think about them going to the same college and taking the same classes?? and the reader sitting next/talking to some other guy and satoru gets jealous?? arwahhhshdhshshs so many possibilities, i hope u continue writing it!!
hi nonnie !! thank you so much :) this is ur official part 2 ! i was struggling to think up some possibilities but this helped a lot :oo | read part 1 here ! -> cw: swearing, jealousy, i let it get fic length oops
(former) highschoolbully!gojo on the brain againā¦ like. when you end up seeing him again however many months later, and you can tell that heās changed. itās not like its immediately obvious to anyone who doesnāt really know him like you (used to); but heās a little softer-spoken and his smiles seem nine times more genuine. itās not a hundred percent; the kind that really lights up his face instead of just barely falling short of his stark blue eyes, but it's something.
of course, you have nothing to base it off of, because when you do inevitably see him again it's the very definition of meet ugly.
college is a new frontier, but its also a clean slate. its your first time going into something so new without your old bestfriend at your side, but some faint flickering thought reminds you that it might be better that way. but the universe is against you from the very first day, when youre gettin yourself some coffee from the same chain you did the morning of that fateful presentation so many moons ago. you're too busy thinking to yourself what kind of strange parting ritual it is to relive your trauma to notice the lanky, white-haired boy who hits his head on the chiming bell over the doorway. people are giggling around you n sighing dreamily but youre too deep in the music pumping through your headphones to notice and your eyes are glued to the class schedule on your phone, trying to ensure you dont get lost on the first day whenā
you blink and your ass is flat on the dirty floor of the coffee shop, and the first thing you register is that your stomach is soaked and burning. you'd spilled your coffee. it takes you a moment to realize, but when you do you're pissed. so you quickly get to your feet, trying to reign in what little of your ego you have left to give the offender who bumped into you a piece of your mind as you look up, then..
how unlucky do you have to be?
just like that, satoru's slid himself back into your life, after ramming through its locked gates. you forget that he always forgets the point of keys, both when it comes to his apartment (which you still have the spare key of in case of emergencies), and the door to your heart. to rub salt in the wound, the only thing that's stained with your coffee order are his shoes, which look like they cost three weeks of your old job salary, but it's all over your shirt. of course it is. because why not? make it look like you tripped and fell into a patch of mud on your way to the lecture hall and tack on an unwelcome reunion with your ex-bestfriend.
to you, it's like the cloud of gloom from your highschool youth has resettled over your head like a swarm of gnats on a dreary, hot summer day. the stars always seem to skew and misalign themselves for you. but for satoru, the stars have handed him one of those huge swirly lollipops that you only ever see being paraded about by toddlers. he recovers almost instantly, trading the burn on his feet and the way it sours your expression like he's just squirted pure citric acid into your throat for a pleasant burn of his own on his cheeks. but it's whatever. girls seem to like it when he blushes, for some reason. he won't question it, if it works on the only one he cares about.
he holds his hand out, ready to help you out like the good samaritan he's becomeā and it's like a real burn to his heart this time when you ignore it and stand up on your own, refusing to look up and meet his pleading gaze. might as well have taken an iron stoker right out of the fire and jabbed him with it. but he's gojo satoru! he won't be defeated by this one mere, maybe very significant reunion. he's got stamina.
so he offers to buy you a new drink, feels his heart sink when you shake your head (can't even spare a little 'no' in his direction), and talks enough for the both of you when you leave the dingy little store make your way down to campus and the lecture building. you clearly don't want to see him, but he ignores that in exchange to notice the way you shiver every so often. the previously searing-hot coffee that stains your shirt turns cold fast, and moisture n wind don't mix well. he wishes he could offer you some of his own warm coffee, no doubt sickeningly sweet, but he has some sensitivity now, apparently. so, in a brash moment, he decides to take his blazer off and drape it over your shoulders instead.
when you cross the threshold between city and campus, you expect him to yank it off your back and be on his merry way. but he keeps walking next to you, so you walk a little faster, and you absolutely loathe the cheeky little grin that curves the corners of his lips up to show a glint of teeth when he effortlessly keeps up. you curse his long legs when you find yourself winded, but at least you can lose him when you get there.
or, that's what you think. once again, your constellations break themselves to rebuild anew for satoru. you're about to call him a stalker when he follows you all the way to your classroom with that smirk that's growing exponentially untilā oh, no.
your phone that's been on the schedule up until now desperately scrolls to the rosterā and there it is. he's in your class. needless to say, not another word goes between you as you stomp in and take a seat. luckily for you, you've already corresponded with your roommate's brother (who's annoyingly cute, satoru notices) and agreed to sit next to each other. satoru takes the seat right above you and never stops kicking his freakishly long legs against the wood the entire time.
so yeah, it's obvious he's not a saint; he still has that undoable ego and he's cocky as fuck (as you have the misfortune of finding out when he quickly bullies your professor), but there's a certain familiarity in that no matter how ugly it might appear to others. and if you asked (which he really, really hopes you will someday), he doesn't hang around douchebags who use kids' foreheads for ashtrays and treat girls like they're candy from a glittery pez dispenser. and at least he's switched harassment targets. even though he has an overwhelming sense of superiority over others and never has his lips together for more than five seconds, and even though he has this hellish habit of clicking his pen whenever he's not talking (or when someone else is), it seems like he's changed.
and over time, you gradually find yourself warming up to him. the spunkiness that used to get on your nerves ceaselessly becomes an object of endearment, and you don't really mind the way he never seems to stop moving anymore. it's a nice sort of distraction in the lifeless still of the lecture hall, albeit the pen clicking still drives you near insanity. you notice he always does it obnoxiously and quickly when you're talking to your roommate's brother, but you ignore it.
and for satoru? he hates that he can kinda sorta really tell that you're the only one who can read him like he's a damn book, cus you slowly start to soften up in the nostalgia of his presence like cold playdough between warm fingers that tell you he may have finally caught you again after letting you slip the first time. and he notices it. this time, he's determined not to let you be the one that got away again. but youre really giving him a shit time outta it with the way you constantly entertain the guy who always has his breath in your face.
yeah, he's got a cute face that's sunkissed by freckles. yeah, his hair looks like he models for shampoo companies. and fuck, he has a nice voice. but what of it? satoru's the one with the mesmerizing blue irises and the cloudy white hair your professor wishes he had instead of sad little wisps of old age. still, as chilly days turn into frigid weeks, he gets the perfect backseat angle of the growing relationship between the two of you. the boy's kinda dumb so you copy off of satoruās work when you need to (he has to hide the 1-0 scoreboard between him and the guy on a sticky note from you when you take his notes), but said guyās always buying you stuff and lending you erasers and laughing when you flick the shavings at the annoying girl who never stops whispering in the front of the room.
satoru tries to act unbothered, and he almost convinces everyone. including himself. but the angry, burning knot in his chest that's entirely different from coffee stains suggests something more. that should be him at your side. him, making balls of paper with rude scribbles and silly doodles to throw at the people he knows you don't like. him, surprising you with little gifts and the cheap trinkets he knows you adore so much instead of all the luxury things he could afford. there's no way this punk could possibly measure up to him, right? but at least you and satoru are well on your way to becoming friends again. not as close as you used to be, but it's something. substantial. and he's learned to be patient in the time you've been gone.
but he'd be lying through his teeth if he said he wasn't tired of it. heās endlessly plagued with thoughts of increasing intensityā first, it starts out with just you. only you. the way he likes it. the way he likes your face, and your pretty eyes and your gorgeous lips and your soft hair and your figure and the complimenting clothes you wear. but it takes a turn; thoughts turn into dreams that turn into fantasies and he's lying when he says he doesn't enjoy them when he accidentally lets it slip during a group study sessionā and itās all fineā but then, that guy appears. the brat who seems to sit a centimeter closer to you with each coming day. not only does he haunt satoru in real life, heās tormenting his dreams, too. tainting the image of beautiful you.
needless to say, satoru starts to wake up with his hands gripping his damp pillow like he's choking it, acutely aware of the sweat sliding down his neck and over his chest as he stares up at the ceiling, listening to the dorm's air conditioner run and thinking of what it'd be like for dreams (the ones where he replaces the boy) to become reality.
it's a buildup. and soon, he reaches the apex; it's like a rollercoaster, that stomach-twisting moment when you reach the top of the rail that points to the steep descent downward. but this time, he hopes it's a thrill he gets instead of the usual falling fright; the one he got when he realized heād slipped between your fingers in highschool.
and satoru finally comes to a grinding halt at the top of the ride one breezy fall day when he decides he wants you back in his life after you smile brightly at him and wave goodbye for the day. heās tired of you having one foot in and one foot out of his heart; he wants, needs more. he always has, he realizes.
so heās thinking about you and how to approach the feelings heās realized during those long lectures, and one morning he comes up with some semblance of a plan when heās high on the sugar from the fruit tea you bought him that morning. and he hopes that, by the end of it, he'll leave your apartment with your hand in his currently empty one, chilled with the remnants of cold condensation from the bottle.
soon enough, satoru finds himself extinguishing his nerves and raising a tense fist to knock on the door with nothing but the clothes on his back and a flimsy plan to ask you out on a midterm study sesh and maybe even a date, but he stops when he realizes itās slightly ajar. a brief thought of what look might be on your face when he surprises you crosses his mind, so he lets himself in quietly, because he knows every single floorboard that creaks like the back of his palm from his childhood. heās hit with a wave of warmth and an achingly familiar scent that twists at his heart, and your apartment is cozy and safe and it screams you and he thinks he catches sight of his jacket slung across the back of the couch in your living room, but heās not sure so he takes a step forward andā
heās greeted with the sight of that stupid guy with the nice hair and the freckles, and it makes his heart drop. but even worse, heās kissing you and his arms are winding around your waist but youāre kissing him back with a slight hesitation thatās blinded to satoru by his shock and the fingers he thought would end up in his own tonight card through the boyās hair and your lips glisten with the strawberry-kiwi flavored gloss he watched the boy give you a few days back and his world is turning red and he feels like his throat is constricting and he canāt breatheā
and he doesnāt even realize youāve parted lips and youāre calling his name through the newfound tightness of his chest and the painful ringing in his ears thats even louder than any silence of a lecture hall, or the void that shouldāve been filled with your voice during the time you were apart. but now satoru realizes heād take that any fucking chance to have that again because itās so much better than what heās stuck with now. having you, but not really having you, because youāre there but youāre someone elseās and youāre not his and he isnāt yours. the best thing he could ever hope for was for you to own an article of his clothing and a piece of his shattered heart, broken into a million fragments. some cruel voice in his buzzing head reminds him to change the scoreboard to 0-100.
and he could buy you cheap hot coffee or earn your smiles from scrunched up paper balls or even hear your laugh with crude jokes, but thereās no point when he realizes he canāt buy you with caffeine or earn you with hitting the back of peopleās heads with his bio notes or have you and your laugh all to himself anymore.
itās almost pathetic, the way satoruās voice cracks and changes. the look of unadulterated concern on the face of the boy who stole your lips just adds fuel to the fire.
āgojo? what are you doing hereā hey, are you okay? you look like youāve seen a ghost.ā
he noticed youād stopped calling him satoru a few weeks back. he shouldāve seen it coming.
āhuh? oh, yeah. iām good. i think youāre the one hallucinating.ā
heād never told a bigger lie in his life.
satoru had left after excusing himself for intruding. how very unlike him to be so polite, you think.
so in the end, he leaves your apartment with something in his hand, after all. but it's not your ownā just his blazer that youād given back to him before he stepped out the door, taunting him with the faint scent of coffee and lingering perfume. his hope was foolish, so it seems. itās too bad, he thinks. if it were him, he wouldāve sandwiched you against your counter while he kissed. but it wasnāt. apparently, it was your turn for your stars to align at the price of his.
and so, gojo satoru, the boy force-turned man with a chipped ego and a completely broken heart, loses you again.
bonus bonus.. part 2ā¦.
#here u go. yes!! u!!!!!! sorry it got long#thank you guys for the reception on the last part literally checking tumblr religiously the rbs and comments made me feel like floating#yea hes a hopeless loser srry i dont make the rules#ABND I TRIED TO HOLD HERRR but there was nothing i could do to stop her from cutting her beautiful blue hair off šš#gojo satoru#gojo angst#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#gojo x reader#gojo x you#satoru gojo#jjk gojo#gojo jjk#satoru gojo x you#satoru gojo x reader#satoru gojo x y/n#gojo satoru x y/n#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk angst#did not proofread b i hope itās good šāāļøšāāļø#actually i j realized the coffee campus intro part is similar to another fic iāve read sorry if u noticed that it was on my subconscious š#billet-doux
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#thanks for the weird dreams drawfee#mother sonny please save me from despair#im not too proud of this im ngl#pls dont hold me to any standards im not real#drawfee#mother sonny#sad draws#fanart
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