#donkey owners

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

A rejuvenating encounter.

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[froody]

It’s advisable to keep your livestock out in open pasture during hurricanes and large storms because animals naturally travel to the highest point during flooding and move for their safety if given the option. Larger flightier animals like horses will injure themselves if left locked in a barn during a big storm. If you live in an area prone to dangerous storms, make sure to microchip your pets (yes, you can microchip pigs and horses and goats and other pets, it’s not just for cats and dogs) and don’t lock them in the barn.

[spinnysocks]

help i didn't know donkeys are normally ridden in the annesburg area i accidentally killed a guy cuz i wanted to ride what i thought was a rare donkey spawn 😭😭😭

[gothhabiba]

Hi, this is very ignorant. I'm trying to read as much as I can on Palestine and Zionism but there is one point I cannot find an answer for. Given that Zionism is not Judaism, given that at the beginning most Jewish people did not share this view and was actually supported by christians with antisemitic views, given that it was conceptualized as a colonial project that could only be actualized by ethnically cleanse Palestine, one thing I don't know how to disagree with Zionists is the idea that Jewish people do come from that land. Even if European jews are probably not genetically related to the Jewish people from there, I think Jewishness is something that can be constructed as related to that land. This of course does not mean that Palestinians are not natives too and they have every right to their land. However I don't really know how to answer when Jewish (Zionists) tell me that Jewish people fled that land during the diaspora. Other than "yeah but the people that stayed are native that underwent christianization before, arabization later, grew a sense of nationhood in the 19th century and are Palestinians now"

It's a fundamental misunderstanding of what "indigeneity" is to believe that it means "whoever has the oldest claim to the land." Rather, to describe a people as "indigenous" is a reference to their current relationship to the government and to the land—namely that they have been or are being dispossessed from that land in favour of other private owners (settlers); they have a separate, inferior status to settlers according to the law, explicitly; they are shut out of institutions created by the settler state, explicitly; they are targeted implicitly by the laws of the settler state (e.g. Israeli prohibitions against harvesting wild thyme or using donkeys or horses for transportation); the settler state does not punish violence against them; &c. &c.

It is a settler-colonialist state that creates indigeneity; without one, it is perfectly possible for immigrants to move to and live in a new location without becoming settlers, with the superior cultural and legal status and suppression of a legally inferior population that that entails.

If all that were going on were some Jewish people feeling a personal or religious connexion to this land and wanting to move there, accepting the existing people and culture and living with them, not expelling and killing local populations and creating a settler-colonialist state that privileges them at the expense of extant populations, that would be a completely different situation. But any assertion of the land's fundamental Jewish-ness (really they mean white or European Jewishness—the Jewish Arabs who were already in Palestine never seem to figure in these arguments) is a canard that distracts from the fundamental issue, which is a people's right to resist dispossession, ethnic cleansing, and genocide.

Decolonize Palestine lays out some of the ethnic and cultural history of the region, but follows it up with:

So, what does this all mean for Palestine? Absolutely nothing. Although the argument has many ahistorical assumptions and claims, it is not these which form its greatest weakness. The whole argument is a trap. The basic implication of this line of argumentation is as follows: If the Jewish people were in Palestine before the Arabs, then the land belongs to them. Therefore, the creation of Israel would be justified. From my experience, whenever this argument is used, the automatic response of Palestinians is to say that their ancestors were there first. These ancestors being the Canaanites. The idea that Palestinians are the descendants of only one particular group in a region with mass migrations and dozens of different empires and peoples is not only ahistorical, but this line of thought indirectly legitimizes the original argument they are fighting against. This is because it implies that the only reason Israel’s creation is unjustified is because their Palestinian ancestors were there first. It implies that the problem with the argument lies in the details, not that the argument as a whole is absolute nonsense and shouldn’t even be entertained. The ethnic cleansing, massacres and colonialism needed to establish Israel can never be justified, regardless of who was there first. It’s a moot point. Even if we follow the argument that Palestinians have only been there for 1300 years, does this suddenly legitimize the expulsion of hundreds of thousands? Of course not. There is no possible scenario where it is excusable to ethnically cleanse a people and colonize their lands. Human rights apply to people universally, regardless of whether they have lived in an area for a year or ten thousand years. If we reject the “we were there first” argument, and not treat it as a legitimizing factor for Israel’s creation, then we can focus on the real history, without any ideological agendas. We could trace how our pasts intersected throughout the centuries. After all, there is indeed Jewish history in Palestine. This history forms a part of the Palestinian past and heritage, just like every other group, kingdom or empire that settled there does. We must stop viewing Palestinian and Jewish histories as competing, mutually exclusive entities, because for most of history they have not been. These positions can be maintained while simultaneously rejecting Zionism and its colonialism. After all, this ideologically driven impulse to imagine our ancestors as some closed, well defined, unchanging homogenous group having exclusive ownership over lands corresponding to modern day borders has nothing to do with the actual history of the area, and everything to do with modern notions of ethnic nationalism and colonialism.

I would also be careful about mentioning a sense of "nationhood" or "national identity" in this context, as it could seem to imply that people need a "national" identity (a very specific and very new idea) in order not to deserve genocide. Actually the idea that Palestinians lacked a national identity (of the kind that developed in 19th-century Europe) is commonly used to justify Zionism. Again from Decolonize Palestine:

This slogan ["A land without a people for a people without a land"] persists to this day because it was never meant to be literal, but colonial and ideological. This phrase is yet another formulation of the concept of Terra Nullius meaning “nobody’s land”. In one form or the other, this concept played a significant role in legitimizing the erasure of the native population in virtually every settler colony, and laying down the ‘legal’ and ‘moral’ basis for seizing native land. According to this principle, any lands not managed in a ‘modern’ fashion were considered empty by the colonists, and therefore up for grabs. Essentially, yes there are people there but no people that mattered or were worth considering. There is no doubt that Zionism is a settler colonial movement intent on replacing the natives. As a matter of fact, this was a point of pride for the early Zionists, as they saw the inhabitants of the land as backwards and barbaric, and that a positive aspect of Zionism would be the establishment of a modern nation state there to act as a bulwark against these ‘regressive’ forces in the east [You can read more about this here]. A characteristic feature of early Zionist political discourse is pretending that Palestinians exist only as individuals or sometimes communities, but never as constituting a people or a nation. This was accompanied by the typical arrogance and condescension towards the natives seen in virtually every settler colonial movement. That the early settlers interacted with the natives while simultaneously claiming the land was empty was not seen as contradictory to them. According to these colonists, even if some scattered, disorganized people did exist, they were not worthy of the land they inhabited. They were unable to transform the land into a modern functioning nation state, extract resources efficiently and contribute to ‘civilization’ through the free market, unlike the settlers. Patrick Wolfe’s scholarship on Australia illustrates this dynamic and how it was exploited to establish the settler colony.

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

It's a Match! || 141 x reader

[ Chapter 6 ] || [ Chapter 8 ]

Pairing: Price x gn!Reader || 141 x gn!Reader Words: 1.8K~ cw: SMUT, SMUT, SMUT. oral (m!receiving). sex (protected). Unspecified age gap. John is a little selfish. Also: the boys aren't very happy. Summary: While overcoming recent heartbreak, you decide to join Tinder in search of a rebound. Your friends advise to just Swipe Right indiscriminately... What happens when 4 soldiers from the same squad match with you? a/n: tried my best to keep the smut as gender neutral as possible!

Chapter 7: Getting Laid!!

Last night, you and John stumbled in the door of your flat with your lips pressed together.

You swore that was something only happened in romcoms, when the main character and her rival/best-friend/ex/a stranger met at the bar, got drunk, and somehow stumbled in the door and did it right on the kitchen table or whatever.

Nope.

Nope. It happened.

He had his arms wrapped around your torso, one snugly around your hip/lower waist, the other running up over your spine, with his hand sinking into your hair.

He tossed his foot back, knocking the door closed with a donkey kick as your hands struggled to untuck his stupid maroon button-up.

Instead of fumbling with the buttons, he ripped it off himself, a few of the buttons popping off and being sent flying around the room. He shrugged it off himself before guiding you over the living room sofa.

The flat was a mess, you had tried to tell him, because you weren’t expecting to bring him (or anyone, ever) back here. But that wasn’t a concern at that moment.

John fell on top of you on the couch, his hands already ripping your shirt off and throwing it somewhere it wouldn’t get in the way (you’d come to find it behind your flatscreen tv).

His fingers kneaded and caressed your torso, squeezing at your waist as his mouth slide away from yours, over your jaw, and down to your neck, biting down onto it and sucking at the skin like it was his to mark.

Your hands found the back of his white crewneck and you pulled it off, momentarily getting him tangled in it, before you tossed it on the floor. 

You barely had a moment to feast your eyes on the sight of his bare torso before he was slipping your boots off and then dragging your jeans off your legs… Like a rabid animal, primal and hungry. 

You caught glimpses of his figure as he raised your leg and peppered kisses from your ankle, wet tongue jotting out to lick up your thigh toward your underwear.

He’s strong but soft, the owner of large pecks and a warm belly, both covered in thick, dark, coarse hair, that disappear in a happy trail under his jeans.

You pull his face toward yours, locking your lips into a deep kiss again, your tongues finding each other as he holds himself up over you. Pulling away from the kiss, you looked at him. “Flip over…” You whispered.

He didn’t need to be told twice, grabbing you around the waist again and hurling you up as he shifted to sit down on the couch, thighs spread to accommodate the growing bulge in his jeans.

You knelt between his legs, nimble fingers undoing his belt and immediately tugging the dark fabric away from his thick thighs. He groaned in relief as he watched you struggle with his boots for a moment before you succeeded in getting it all off him.

His hand palmed at his hardened cock, eyelids droopy as your hands ran up his legs, feeling the hair in them, and sometimes catching the little bumps and scars of past injuries, some of them discreet, some of them obvious and particularly gnarly. Some of them could rival some of his Simon’s.

You tugged down his boxers briefs, allowing his cock to spring free. It’s uncut, long and decently thick, and his hair is neatly trimmed. The head peeks out just a bit, showing how red and angry it is, the whole length throbbing, needy for your touch.

Your eyes locked onto his, spotting that it wasn’t just his cock that was needy. He looked at you like a starved man about to have a meal. Barely restrained, his jaw clenched, fists tightened shut, the muscles on his thighs taut with anticipation.

You ran your tongue over your palm before wrapping it around his cock, hearing him hiss and throw his head back as you started stroking it. Your other hand slowly, carefully, pulled back the hood of his cock before you wrapped your lips and tongue around it, gingerly sliding it further into your mouth.

You could’ve sworn John was going to have an aneurysm. “Fuckin’ hell… That’s it…” He grunted and huffed consecutively as he tensed up a bit, bucking his hips upward to meet your mouth.

“F-Fuck… That’s it…” He grumbled under his breath as he looked down at you. John had been with plenty of people, but something about the way you looked on your knees with his cock steadily slipping down your throat, got him in a way no one else did.

“Jesus… Fuckin’... Christ…” He dipped his head back as your tongue drew circles around him before you swallowed him deeper, breathing steadily through your nose so as to not choke.

“God… Been… B-Been a while since I got… Christ-” He grunted again, one hand shooting up to grip the back of your neck as he slowly rocked his cock into your mouth, beads of precum drooling over your tongue.

“C’mere.” He demanded as he pulled you back from his cock and up to your feet. He grabbed hold of his jeans from the floor, in search of his wallet and pulled out a whole sheet of condoms which was folded neatly inside, He stuck them between his lips before he stood.

Grabbing hold of you, he walked you across your flat, making use of the sitting room lights to navigate the hall into the bedroom, and dropped you onto your bed. He tossed the condoms aside and his lips crashed into yours, lips parted so that your tongues found each other.

His hands grabbed hold of your underwear and tugged it off, sending it flying across the room while he grabbed hold of the condoms and ripped off one, rough fingers search struggling to open the foil, before he finally succeeded and slipped it on.

“You good?” He checked on you, eyes locked on yours as he slotted himself between your legs, kneeling in front of you and adjusting you to fit him. One leg wrapped around his waist, the other over the bend of his elbow to keep you spread open for him.

“Yeah.” You replied, immediately feeling him rub the leaking head of his cock against your entrance, allowing the lube of the condom to lubricate you just a bit.

It had been ages since you had last gotten laid, a miserable consequence of your ex-boyfriend, Ethan, and one of the main reasons you had broken up. Sex with him, much like your relationship, was dead and unfulfilling.

You felt John push his way inside, slotting himself in the warmth and snugness of your body as you squealed, your head falling back onto the bed. He grunted some incoherent praise, or what you assume was praise, his fingers digging into the extra fat on your legs to keep him steady enough.

He leaned over you, one closed fist on either side of your head, curling you onto yourself and allowing him easier access to thrust into you. Slow, torturously slowly, his cock stretching you and forcing you to accomodate him.

“Fuckin’ hell… So fuckin’ good…” He groaned, eyes closing and mouth falling open as he threw his hips down against yours. It was slow and considerate, but the way he huffed and grunted told you it was already too much for him.

But John was a man of focus. He uncurled his fists in order to grip your bed covers and squeeze them tight as his hips bounced off yours, his weeping girth always burying itself to the hilt before he pulled back again, making sure to bottom out every time.

You whimpered and moaned, eyes screwed closed and a shiver running down your spine every time the bouncy cock plunged into you, the upward tilt of it making sure to drag dangerously slowly across the one spot in your body that caused your mind to go blank, stars prickling in the corners of your eyes.

“F-Fuck… John…” You sighed as he kept the torturously slow pace, somehow driving you crazy just as much as he would while pounding you into oblivion.

“Yeah… that’s it. Moan my name, love.” He ordered as he leaned closer.

“J-John…” You cried out softly as his hips stuttered lightly, causing him to bury himself deep twice in a row.

“I know, darling. I know.” He grumbled. “You haven’t gotten properly shagged in a while, have you?” He taunted a bit. “Haven’t either, sweet thing…” He added.

His hands grabbed your jaw on either side, his thumbs hooked onto your cheeks, the remaining fingers slipping under and around your ears, nails digging lightly into your scalp.

“I’ll make sure to make it last as long as possible, hm?” He added as he kissed at your lips, sucking your bottom lip between his lightly.

-

John was in a much better mood when he sat down for breakfast at the mess hall with Ghost, Gaz and Soap. He actually greeted them with a ‘Good morning’, his tray was piled high with food and his hair was wet from a recent shower.

The other three were looking at him with raised brows and intrigued glances, even if Ghost was trying to be discreet about them. They could read between the lines to know he had gotten lucky with you the night before, so they didn’t need to ask questions they knew the answers to.

Instead, they exchanged glances and kept eating their breakfasts… All except for Simon, who was simply drinkin a cup of breakfast tea.

“I don’t think it’s fair.” Soap ended up saying as Price was halfway through shoveling a hash brown into his mouth.

“What isn’t, Soap?” Price asked, eyes narrowed in confusion, and brows scrunched.

“We all matched ‘em on Tinder and didn’t get more than a ‘I’ll think about meetin’ up with you’.” The younger sergeant explained halfway through chewing his bite of sausage. “You meet with ‘em, get a shag… And we did all the work for it.” He added. “But when it comes to us ourselves, they don’t want us.” He complained.

“What are we gonna do?” Gaz complained. “Maybe they just like older men…” He said with a shrug. “Sucks but there’s other people out there.” He adds while drinking his orange juice.

“Are you seriously going to call dibs on the fact you saw ‘em before Price?” Ghost said in surprise.

“I’m just saying!” Soap grunted and shoveled some more scrambled eggs into his mouth.

“Learn to take rejection with class, MacTavish. It’s going to happen to you more and more often as you get older.” Ghost quipped.

“Awa' an' bile yer heid!” Soap scoffed and flipped the middle finger at Ghost.

Meanwhile, the Captain was giving them all a look, while staying silent, seeming amused by their antics and a little by their jealousy. He could tell that despite the fact Gaz and Ghost had disagreed with Soap, their eyebrows were also furrowed in contemplation.

So, he simply turned off to the side and drank from his own tea with a smug smirk on his lips.

taglist: @daisychainsinknots , @bunnysdaydreams , @iite-cool , @lahniu , @pagesfalling , @tapioca-milktea1978 , @live-love-be-unique , @thelaisydazy , @littleghosthunter , @bossva , @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago , @chamomiletealeaf , @ghosts-hoe , @kariiiel , @ltbarnes , @irregulardongyoung , @spacelia , @hayleybarnesx , @infpt-zylith , @xxshadowbabexx , @frescoisnotinthemilitary , @leeeenistop , @lucienbarkbark , @zombie-freak , @wittleespur , @agoodmoviekiss , @l0lziez , @whos-fran , @greatstormcat , @openup-yourmind , @neoarchipelago

[hedgehog-moss]

Here are 7 little facts about my donkey and how his summer is going :)

1. I received an anon the other day asking if Pirou was still a working donkey who carries my firewood for me, and the answer is yes. I've been cutting some branches from the big cherry tree that fell down the other day, and Pirlouit has been valiantly carrying them to the woodshed—fun fact, for this activity he likes to wear his ears like this:

Probably because this T position is reminiscent of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross, which is how Pirlouit perceives himself as he carries heavy logs for me. He's willing, but his martyrdom should be acknowledged.

Here's Poldine acknowledging it with a nose kiss, because Poldine.

I stopped so they could have their little chat.

2. Pirou has been chatting with a lot of new friends lately—we met these horses on a walk and he was so happy to stop and touch noses with them while making equid noises. Llamas are good with the nose-touching but their llama noises are just less interesting to Pirlouit. He had such interested ears here! "Finally a serious grown-up conversation"

We also met this goose during the same walk and Pirlouit was a lot less eager to go say hi to her. The goose was yelling threats at us and we prudently stayed away, and Pirou was clearly thinking "this bird is doing a better job at protecting her home from intruders than Pandolf ever could" (it's true, Pan assumes intruders are friends until proven otherwise)

3. You'll notice that there are houses in this pic! Our walks got longer and longer until one day we went all the way to the village (it took 1 hour 20min at Pirlouit's leisurely pace). I was so proud of him. I've been trying to convince my friends to go to the village on donkeyback (this requires two people, because you can ride Pirlouit but you can't tell him where to go unless there's someone holding his rope and leading the way)—my friends were reluctant because they still sort of perceive Pirou as the feral animal terrified of everything that he was when I got him. They know he's made a lot of progress but going to town on donkeyback still seemed foolhardy.

So we've been riding Pirlouit in the woods, in familiar environments, and we also went to town with him but without riding him. He was amazingly calm and brave! There's a river that cuts the village in two and the first time we went, we stopped before the bridge, since it's pretty narrow and cars would have to drive very close to Pirlouit, we didn't want to risk it. We just went to say hi to the librarian who lives on the right side of the river, but since Pirlouit was very serene, we did cross the bridge the second time.

He did not care at all about cars driving very close to him (he had one familiar human on either side of him and the drivers were very considerate and went slowly), which emboldened us to stop for a drink on the terrace of the coffeeshop on main street (< also a narrow street with cars driving by quite close to Pirlouit). There was just no problem at all, Pirou let total strangers rub his forehead and was more interested in iced tea than main street traffic.

It was a hot day and we gave him all the ice cubes from our drinks and he chewed them enthusiastically.

4. We made a stop at the pharmacy on our way home because we had another 1 hour 20min walk ahead and I had a blister, and the pharmacist noticed my donkey parked outside his shop and in a determined tone he said, "I want to try something." He took one of the donkey milk soaps from the overpriced-Provence-soaps-for-tourists display and opened the door and offered it for Pirlouit to sniff.

... I'm not sure what he was expecting—for my donkey to go "ohhh this smells like Mother's milk and aloe vera 🥺"—but unfortunately nothing happened.

(4. bis—Sorry, this 4th fact was anticlimactic.)

5. Pirlouit is now the proud owner of a surcingle. Not for equestrian vaulting and not for his log-carrying job because I don't know if it would be solid enough for the weight of a bag full of logs, but I'd like to tie bags or baskets to it to take Pirlouit grocery shopping, now that I know he's okay with going to town :) He even seems to enjoy the adventure, and the attention he gets from children.

And actually I shouldn't write off equestrian vaulting because Pirou is also remarkably chill with weird things happening on his back. I used to be very careful to climb on his back in a quick & fluid way so he wouldn't spook (because he used to! a butterfly flapping its wings in Brazil used to spook him!) but now that my friends are riding him I can confirm we've reached a point where you can climb on Pirlouit's back in any way you want and he'll just be like "...... sure"

6. I almost forgot to mention that Pirou turned 15 last month, according to his ID papers :) Donkeys have a longer life expectancy than horses, they can live 30-40 years on average so he's still a young lad really. Happy 15th birthday Pirlouit :)

7. I wanted to conclude with a nice aesthetic pic of Pirou's shadow on the road during all those walks, like I did with Poldine, but unfortunately donkey shadows do not have the chic je-ne-sais-quoi of llama shadows. Pirlouit looks like a hammerhead shark wearing a tiny fez and that's not his fault.

[moth-boi-lycan]

"Responds to the human British accent for some reason" lmao

I like to think Baron’s notes on the two snapping turtles were something like

Raph: Bites when scared. Seems to understand the english language. Lets the others sit on his shell.

Sandro: Bites for no discernible reason. Broke my pencil. Keeps head-butting the wall. Understands zero language but responds to the human british accent for some reason.

[artifacts-archive]

Tomb Wall Fragment Depicting Donkeys

Egyptian, Old Kingdom, Dynasty 5 (about 2504–2347 BCE)

This fragment is part of a scene of donkeys being driven over grain to separate wheat from chaff- one that was used in many Egyptian tombs. The tomb’s owner selected the decoration for his or her tomb chamber from a selection of established themes, much as one might select wallpaper today.

[k0juki]

You and Mafia Max having a night out in the Netherlands.

Mafia!Max Verstappen

Carneval night

English is not my first language so feel free to point out any mistakes or errors! Also the picture is not mine! Credit goes to owner!

More Mafia!Max posts here!

A/n: The time-line is before they broke up.

Wc: 624

---

You were only a few months in the Netherlands, so Max thought that it would be fun to show you around Amsterdam.

At first you were here just because of your father, but after some time and meeting some new people, including Max, you decided to stay here, with him.

Amsterdam has become more than just a temporary stop—now it's your home, filled with love and adventure. You fell in love with him, and he did the same.

"I heard there's a street festival here." Max suggested and wrapped his arm around your waist. "Live music, delicious food stalls, and carnival games. I thought you would like it."

"That doesn't sound so bad." You teased him, but he can't say he doesn't like it, because he does like it.

As you stroll through the vibrant streets of Amsterdam, the festive atmosphere fills you with excitement. You really liked this place, because it wasn't anything like back home in London.

"Oh, look Max, they have these big stuffed animals here!" You pointed out and made your way to that booth with Max right beside you.

"Who do I have to shoot to get that donkey?" You asked and took that heavy gun. Max and the stall holder laughed. "I mean it."

"Yeah, she's not joking." Max grined and gave warning look to that guy. It was sign that nor Max or you were joking. You really wanted that stupit stuffed animal.

"I'm sure you do young lady, the rules are simple, you have to shoot down the cans. That's all." He explained, as he moved aside, you pointed the gun at cans and shot. Completely missed. It was harder than you expected.

At first, Max was just wheezing, so you didn't mind him much, but after some time... "That was amazing love, you have to teach me." He laughted and clapped his hands.

"Oh, ha ha...I'm just warming up." You adjusted the gun and shot. Missed again.

That couldn't be right, the gun was just too heavy. And what was worse, Max's laugh starts to piss you off. Did he want to die? You were sure he did. You said nothing and just gave him a long side eye. If look could kill, Max would be instantly dead.

"Someone is asking for trouble." You whispered and shot the last shoot. Nothing.

You put the gun down and turned to Max with both hands on your hips. "You wanna try it, Emilian?"

That shut him up, because everyone that was close to Max and you knew that you normally didn't call Max Emilian. More like Max, Maxi or love. You were really pissed off.

But he didn't waste any second and took the gun the moment it was reloaded and perfectly shot three times, all cans fell down.

Max looked at you with a smug face and put down the gun. You just crossed your arms as that stallholder cherished and congratulated Max, he just laughed a little and said, "I will take that donkey."

As Max handed you that stuffed animal, he leaned his head down and kissed your cheek. "For a pretty lady, one big donkey."

You thanked Max and took his hand in yours, everything was forgiven. And then you started dragging him to another interesting place you saw.

But you didn't notice how Max turned back to the stallholder and how they exchanged a long glances of knowing, he knew who Max was, so even if Max didn't shoot right after you, he would give you that stuffed donkey himself.

His life was worth more than some plush.

"What do you say we look for next?" Max asked and put his arm back around you. Even though you were completely clueless, but still happy.

---

🫶

[luboy7rt]

What Animal Los Vaqueros (+ Valeria)   Would Randomly Bring Home To You (GN - Headcanons)

(Note: This is just what I (My headcanons), enjoy reading!)(Could be seen as Platonic, Romantic?) (GN Reader) (Alejandro, Rodolfo and Valeria)

Alejandro Vargas 

- Where did Alejandro find a literal donkey? Neither of you knew, even Alejandro himself didn't know as he walks through the front door, his arms crossed as he watched the donkey peek her head into the kitchen window, pushing her face up against it to see in.

- When Alejandro spots you, his eyes open a bit wide as he bit his inner cheek, before scrambling to make an excuse. He came up with nothing and just admitted he found her while on a mission, and she was hungry and wouldn't stop chewing on Alejandro's shirt.

- Alejandro would chuckle and ask you for some help, cutting up some apples, carrots and bananas for the donkey who tried to get through the front door. Alejandro quickly ran off to ensure she didn't do that.. moving the donkey to the backyard instead.

- He's actually pretty decent at taking care of the donkey, and teased you, asking if you want to feed or ride her. He's joking, please don't ride the donkey, if you do..  He's standing right next to you, prepared to catch you or calm the donkey down so both you and the donkey will be safe.

- Alejandro's willing to find a new farm or home for the donkey if you don't like her, he would indeed tease You about it though, you don't like that cutie of a donkey? Cue the donkey trying to get through the front door, or looking through the kitchen at 3AM, when you go down for a glass of water, you just see eyes peering at you through the window, like hey... whatcha doing here?

- If you do let the donkey stay, cool. New pet, when Alejandro's home, he does care for her, feeds her every morning, brushes her, ensures she's cared for.

- (Alejandro basically just stole a donkey from someone) he shrugs and says he Just found her wandering far from any cities, and she was now his as he didn't find any owners around back then, he definitely wasn't finding one now.

- You will hear the donkey squeal or grunt throughout the night, or early in the morning, It is annoying at first, and you may never get used to It. Alejandro would get agitated after a few mornings of being back from missions and waking up to the donkey making weird noises outside because she got used to being fed whenever she was loud enough so now it became a habit.

- Alejandro would eventually get a small stall built for the donkey, makes it comfortable but also cute looking from the outside. (Also puts extra food to just attempt for the donkey to quiet down the neighbors have complained. You might be too, Alejandro is definitely grumbley about her being so loud, but puts up with it.

- Also ensures there is plenty of room for the donkey to do what she pleases.

- Alejandro once loudly screeched in the middle of the night, you scrambled out of bed when you heard it. Finding the man murmuring in Spanish, throwing insults and curses at the donkey who had her snout pressed against the window, the moon reflecting her eyes to make it ‘scary’ looking if you weren't paying attention.

If you laugh at him he would give you an unhappy half-glare, gently pushed your laughing face away from him as he shook his head, having had thought you put the donkey away in her pen earlier as it was 2AM.

If you attempt to ‘comfort’ him, he's looking away with a tiny blush on his face while laughing, pulling you close while shaking his head, he would put his hand to the window, and knock to get the donkey to go back to her stall that she somehow escaped.

If you just stayed in bed, he's thankful, at least you didn't hear that. But also, why aren't you getting up when you hear that he screeched, he doesn't know if that's a good or bad thing, a tiny bit offended.

Rodolfo 'Rudy' Parra:

- Rudy was picking you up in his car, a little squirmy as you got in the passenger seat, a little blanket on his lap, murmuring quietly to himself, a little distracted.

- If you ask what was ‘wrong’ Rudy would smile awkwardly and pull the blanket back a little bit, showing the little rabbit with one ear on his lap, the rabbit fast asleep. 

- He would indeed let you hold the rabbit on your lap instead as he drives, he calls the rabbit ‘Stompy’ as the rabbit stomps around to move. He would smile at you, watching you in the passage seat at a stop sign, he would move to pat your head.. then Stompy's head then going back to driving.

- What You didn't know.. there was two more at home, waiting for you. Three baby rabbits, Stompy (who just got home from the vet due to their ear), Chirps, and Flumpy, all siblings. Rudy would give a awkward and sheepish smile while rubbing your shoulder, like a ‘Please, don't be upset with this choice I made’ look on his face.

- If you do like the rabbits, great, Rudy is happy with keeping them, he takes all responsibility when he isn't working. He smiles warmly everytime he sees them, gets a little silently giddy about the fact he was the one to save these rabbits.

- If you don't like the rabbits, he will sigh quiet, but will figure out where to rehome these rabbits, will be upset for a little while, but wouldn't take it out on you. He would still smile sadly at you, but try his best to be supportive. If you have an allergy, he feels less bad about it, and willingly brought them to a new home.

- Rudy would always place the rabbits on you, gently nudging one of rabbits snout against your cheek or your jaw with a smile, would either make a little ‘bonk’ or ‘mwah’ noise when he does.. then places a kiss on your head.

- Rudy does Make little cages for them, ones capable of being a ‘safe place’ for the rabbits, a soft little home for them in his house for then to sleep. Usually lets them ‘free’ around the house, you both could hear Stompy stomp about, always makes sure to keep an eye on the three rabbits.

- His eyes would soften every time he spots you cuddling, holding, or playing with one of the rabbits, his whole body and face relaxing as he never informs you that he is watching from the doorway, just watching quietly with a soft smile on his face.

- You would catch Rudy cutting up carrots to feed them as snacks throughout the day, quietly murmuring praise to the rabbits who followed him around, he would spot you and chuckle, looking a tad bit red as he would smile but quiet down when he was ‘caught’.

Valeria Garza:

- Valeria walks into the house confidently, smiling proudly as she holds a baby fox in her hands. Tilting her head and raising an eyebrow at you, like A silent ask I'd you were bold enough to question what she had done and where she had gotten a baby fox.

- If you don't she keeps smiling, scratching behind the baby fox’s ears, allowing you to pet him as well, but if you do ask to do so, she grabs your hand to pet the fox for you.

- Valeria illegally bought this fox, (the people who sold him have been.. dealt with as well) a beautiful little baby fox with a few small white spots on his orange fur. She held him like he was a new trophy she would bring home to you.

- If you don't like the fox, she will make a face.. Fine, perhaps she could keep the fox at her base instead of home, she will make a proper area for him, that you wouldn't be around.

- If you do like the fox, Valeria looks quite smug, humming in answer as she allows the fox to roam in the home, giving him his own little room. She would ensure his comfort, safety and also give him the best treatment no other animal would ever get.

- You often find Valeria talking on the phone with this little fox on her lap, she could go from harshly ordering people around to talking calmly as if not to scare the fox. The fox gets used to It, your hand could pet his head whilst Valeria's distracted, she would allow you to do what you please as long as you don't bring the fox outside the gated backyard.

-  Valeria treats this fox like her baby, like something that is now apart of her vast collection of things she adores.

- Valeria would randomly bring the baby fox to you, placing him on your lap and telling you to go feed him or go play with him because she's busy and unable or (she just doesn't want to) do it herself. She’d make it up to you later, perhaps a favor.. you want to be done?

- If you are holding or cuddling with the little fox, Valeria would randomly walk past, booping his nose, waiting for a moment, before doing the same to you and then going back to doing what she was doing. No questions asked, none will be answered.

[rooksamoris]

Amora, thoughts on this? And how can it be applied to the scarabia duo

omg my cousin sent me this video too!!

in regard to JAMIL <3

he definitely gives me cat person vibes (literally everyone in the middle east/north africa is a cat person from armenia to oman to algeria). i headcanon that scarabia has a bunch of cats around the place. jamil carries heavy baskets of laundry while kittens brush by his bare ankles as he walks about.

its so funny to sit beside him while the cats hide under his hair.

"Ah--out of my hair," he grumbles, pulling the kitten away from his hair. Its tiny claws were clinging to the thick strands, tangling them up with its excitable movements. When he sees the amusement on your face, he rolls his eyes and places the kitty in your lap, gently. He was always so mindful of how he held them, "Pull their hair instead, Za'afaraan (saffron)," he commands. He named the cats in Scarabia after spices. How cute.

i bet he and his family would go on park days too. it's a quick and cheap way of them getting to enjoy each other's company, but it is always so short lived. his responsibilities to kalim are all consuming.

Najma leaned over and glanced at her brother's phone, "Can't you put that down for a minute, himar (donkey)?" she asked, gesturing to the ma'amoul (date stuffed biscuit) and chai that was in front of them. His father had bought it from the souq (market) and his mother made the tea. It was the recipe she had taught him years ago. Jamil rolled his eyes, and shoved his sister's cheek away, "I need to make sure he stays at the estate." He kept his gaze away from his parents. There had to be some sort of tension and guilt... "Yeah, whatever..." Najma trailed off, before sipping her own tea. Her fingers traced over patterns on the sheet they sat on. Ornate swirls and floral motifs. Her unsaid words were weaving their way into the designs, never to be said, but to be seen in her dark eyes. When was the last time they had even spent family time like this? Her brother sighs and breaks his ma'amoul in half, "Here," he says, setting his phone down. Hopefully for longer than a few minutes.

as for KALIM!!

im sure he loves all animals, but cats?? he loves them, especially big cats. you can't tell me that the al-asim family don't have their own version of raja from aladdin. it gives jamil a heart attack at first, but soon enough this tiger is kalim's favorite thing in the world. the tiger ends up trained to protect and coddle kalim. whenever he's in the scalding sands, after greeting all his siblings, he rushes into the fur of his tiger.

"Ra'isa!" he yells, as he leaps against the large tiger. His arms wrapped around her back and then he nuzzled his cheek to its fur. There was a grin on his face as Ra'isa began to curl her body around him. You just stared in a mix of fear and apprehension. You glance between him and the tiger that was cuddling up to him. Of course, you expected chaos when you decided to visit the Scalding Sands with your boyfriend, but this? "Uhm..? Kalim..?" When his ruby eyes notice the look on your face, he laughs and grabs your hand, pulling you closer, "Don't worry. Ra'isa is very friendly with people I like," he reassures, guiding your hand over her fur. Ra'isa leaned into your touch, sensing her owner's adoration for you. When she curled her head in your direction, her face found its way to your belly, clearing signalling for your to scratch behind her eyes. Kalim leaned against the big cat, watching you with a look of joy. His two favorite people were getting along.

kalim's family is MASSIVE. i don't imagine they all go out too often due to how much security would be needed, but they all definitely have chaotic tea parties. you'd think with all that wealth the kids would not have to fight over who gets the last piece of ma'amoul or the last bite of fatta tamr (yemeni dish. its just small pieces of bint al-sahn mixed with minced dates and honey).

Kalim was holding up a box of assorted Turkish Delights away from all of his younger siblings who immediately rushed to his side when they heard he had brought them. He laughed as they reached up their short arms for the box, "There's enough for everyone, just get into a line," he said. The box was full enough to give each of them three pieces of the treats, and yet they still argued about who would get the first piece.

overall, yeah. arab men aren't scary. they literally kiss their homies good night, since when you greet a friend or are leaving for the night, you kiss each other's cheek.

[ansatsu-sha]

The Guild of Merchants' famous publication Wellcome to Ankh-Morporke, Citie of One Thousand Surprises now has an entire section entitled 'Soe you're a Barbarian Invader?' which has notes on night life, folklorique bargains in the bazaar and, under the heading 'Steppe-ing Out,' a list of restaurants that do a dependable mares' milk and yak pudding. And many a pointed-helmeted vandal has trotted back to his freezing yurt wondering why he seems to be a great deal poorer and the apparent owner of a badly-woven rug, a litre of undrinkable wine and a stuffed purple donkey in a straw hat.

Terry Pratchett / Moving Pictures

[fromasgardandback]

arcade

•

masterlist | stranger things summer

Eddie decided to take you on an arcade date. it was one of your first dates when you first started dating, so the memory was a sweet one

he took all his tickets and got you a small teddy bear that you named “Eddie” and stitched on one of his patches onto the back

“So, I know you. What will you win me this time?” you held his hand smiling up at him

“You’ll have to see, babygirl.” he winked down at you before starting on the first game

Pacman was his specialty, but Donkey Kong and Galaga were also his second-best. you however were a beast at Tetris, Super Mario Bros., and Asteroids

five hours go by before you both got starving and “were in desperate need of food” as Eddie put it

the arcade was trendy during the summer and connected next to a small diner, which they converted into arcade space when the owner decided to put it up for sale

you guys sat and snacked on some random food items, and when you thought he went to the bathroom, he actually went to trade in his tickets for a prize. He came back to the table with a widened grin.

“Now you can listen to our mixtape on the go.” he blushed a little in the darkened room of the arcade. you kissed him with passion holding onto his hands across the table

you were dating the most adorable man in the world. no matter what others saw him as he would always be your “Eddie Teddy Bear”

[thehmn]

Watched Puss in Boots 2 last night and goddamn what a great children’s movie. I still have the into song stuck in my head.

I gave Perrito a hint of facial hair because I don’t read him as a child like some people do. He calls Puss and Kitty friends a lot and they treat him too much like a naive but equal person for me to think child. More like Donkey to Shrek.

Also, as a chihuahua owner I’m very impressed that they didn’t take the lazy way out by just studying how dogs move but very specifically how chihuahuas move. It’s difficult to explain but the way he moves his legs, curls his spine and repeatedly tugs and untugs his tail for balance is spot on.

Also, they recognized that both cats and chihuahuas do the head bump of love and used it to great effect.

[pippin-pippout]

Everyone in Joy of Life is technically problematic and this case is about human trafficking but I cannot with these family dynamics.

Fan Xian realizes his little half brother (fake) owns the brothel that is conducting the human trafficking, beats the shit out of him, qi deviates.

Fan Xian finds out that his little half brother's (fake) cousin, aka his little half brother (real) who is also 3rd prince, is the second owner. When this brother arrives, FX immediately knocks him out.

2nd prince shows up (aka older half brother, real), serving cunt as always, with Wang Qinian leading the way, asks two important questions: Q: Why is our little brother passed out on the table? A: He's napping (lie). Q: What happened to your face (to Fan Sizhe) A: A donkey kicked it (lie). Then threatens Fan Xian to join him or he'll pin the human trafficking on him. Fan Xian epically refuses.

Fan Sizhe raises his abacus ready to find the royal family for his brother (which only slightly makes up for him being dumb enough to fall into this trap).

Crown Prince shows up with bigger forces, acts like he is so pleased to see 2nd prince, and immediately asks the exact same questions 2nd prince had.

Wang Qinian hides behind a curtain

2nd prince asks crown prince if he is really willing to defend FX who bears the crime of deceiving the emperor

Crown prince responds "isn't Fan Xian already dead?" (Fan Xian is sitting directly between them)

WHO IS THIS THEN?

2nd brother don't scare me. There's no one there :)

I both love and hate this family.

[hedgehog-moss]

9am: Pirlouit & I are waiting for the farrier; it's Hoof Day! The farrier always tends to run late so I have a thermos of tea and a breakfast pastry to eat as we wait. Pirlouit has been offered some hay and has refused to eat it because he's sulking because it's hoof day.

Isn't it nice to get a pedicure, Pirou?

9:10am: The farrier is late and Pirlouit is worried, wondering what we're waiting for here on the road. Maybe he has been sold? to a sadistic new owner? who's going to shove him into a crate and send him to the salt mines like the donkeys in Pinocchio? Plus, he's more stressed than usual today because one of his hooves hurts (hence the farrier appointment), he's been limping for a few days and he doesn't know what the farrier will do to the hurt hoof. I told him there's only a 30% chance that he'll amputate it.

9:15am: Pirlouit's family is here to support him though! Or, in the case of Pampérigouste, here to puzzle out a vexing mystery.

9:17am: The llamas have grown bored of standing there in support and have started eating the brambles near the gate (supportively). Very good initiative, I approve. Also I thought Poldine was trying to eat the brambles outside the gate (greener on the other side and all that) but no, she was trying to fit her head through the bars for a little kiss </3

9:20am: Even Merricat is being supportive. (Well, she's waiting for me to go home so she can finally take her first morning nap in my lap.) Also Pirlouit has found some grass under the leaves and temporarily forgot all of his worries.

9:22am: Poldine is determined to kiss this cat.

9:24am: The farrier is here! As always he starts doing Pirlouit's hooves right there in the middle of the road, and if a car shows up well, "they can wait a few minutes... On n'est pas aux pièces" (this is a phrase for "there's no rush" that I've never heard anyone but my grandma use, it's nice to hear it again!) There aren't any cars anyway.

9:27am: Pirlouit's hurt hoof has been diagnosed: he has an abscess. Since this autumn has been relentlessly rainy I thought perhaps it was a fungal infection—but the farrier told me he's been treating a lot of abscesses lately, as the very wet weather softens hooves which allows bacteria to enter.

9:30am: The abscess was successfully drained and Pirlouit is now wearing a fashionable hoof bandage. He was very calm and brave throughout <3

9:35am: The farrier left his car by the side of the road, and after releasing Pirlouit we crossed the pasture to go home have a cup of coffee.

9:45am: The farrier is gone; end of the post :)

10am: Pampe is gone, too.

Well, she probably left around 10am but I didn't immediately find out as I had more pressing problems. After the farrier left I went to get a small apple to reward Pirlouit, and when I returned to the pasture and he came over for his treat, I realised he was limping. But on the other side. We've just treated his right front hoof, and he is now holding up the left front hoof...

9:57am: After giving Pirlouit his apple I go home in a hurry to call the farrier and ask him to come back. But there's almost no mobile service around here and I can't reach him. This is so frustrating, he can't be very far... On a hunch I call a horse farm not far from here, maybe it's hoof day for their horses as well?

10am: It's not, they have no farrier appointment today, but when I explain my predicament the woman on the phone goes "if it's just to drain an abscess I can send you a guy who'll do it, no worries!" Every time I've had someone from this farm on the phone to ask something or other, they've offered to Send Me A Guy. It's never the same guy too, they have an endless supply of guys.

10:05am: Having accepted gratefully, I return to the pasture to catch poor Pirlouit again, who thought I was done bothering him for today. As I wait for The Guy, I find a spot with some unexpected mobile service and start googling hoof hardeners, because maybe if Pirou's prone to abscesses it's worth having something in prevention for wet months?

10:15am: I receive a text from the guy.

"Is it normal that your llama is on the road with a dog? They are going to [village]."

10:16am: I reply to the guy.

"It's neither normal nor abnormal."

10:17am: I tie Pirlouit to a tree and run back to the barn to get some muesli. Then start running on the road, trying to figure out how Pampe escaped, and the answer seems obvious: after his coffee the farrier crossed the pasture again to get back to his car, and he knew about the Special Anti-Pampe Safety Knot 3000 but either forgot and closed the gate like a normal person, or didn't do it correctly. Pampe in her little llama brain knows very well that most visitors don't know about the Anti-Pampe Knot so she hurries to check the gate after a stranger leaves her pasture. Meanwhile I was busy noticing Pirou's limp and trying to call the farrier back and I didn't check the gate as I usually do.

10:20am: The guy has found me trotting on the road with my muesli and picked me up in his car. We go back to where he last saw Pampe. I apologise for wasting his time and he tells me "I've heard of your llama" in a tone half-sympathetic half-fatalistic.

10:24am: Pampe & Pandolf have been located; are having the time of their lives. Pandolf is a bit sheepish when I call him, though. He loves going on adventures with his best friend so much but he knows it's a bad dog thing to do for some reason :(

10:34am: The Guy is trying to push Pampe forward with his car while I try to attract her towards me with my muesli in a carrot-and-stick routine; Pampe occasionally veers off-road to eat some leaves, inspect the mud in the ditch, pretend to admire a cloud while secretly brainstorming strategies.

Guy's commentary: "This is worse than dealing with an escaped horse. I feel ignored. I feel powerless."

10:39am: Pampe is home! She didn't actually go very far. But since she hadn't locked the gate behind her, when we arrived we found Pampelune on the road as well, just sort of waiting for us like a sentinel. Pirlouit was still tied to his tree staring at his inexplicably orange foot, and Poldine was panicking because her mother had abandoned her for the millionth time and her grandma had left the pasture too and she couldn't figure out how :((( All she had to do was fiddle with the gate with her nose really, but it never occurred to her to do so, she's too innocent. She only inspects gates in order to figure out how to kiss someone through them. So she was alone in the pasture trotting in circles, making undignified sad goat noises when Pampe & I returned.

10:53am: Pirlouit's other hoof has been treated, hopefully he'll feel better and stop limping soon... I'll have to remove the bandages with scissors, clean both hooves and re-do the bandages in a couple of days which is probably going to be a whole Thing, considering he's suspicious of buckets of water and scissors and objects in general. But as for now everyone is in the pasture having some celebratory hay and Pampoldine is deeply relieved to find that she hasn't been abandoned by everyone forever (as she assumes every single time.)

Also I realised I only paid the farrier half of what I owed him... I had prepared the exact sum but I had half in one pocket and half in another which was a risky idea. And neither of us checked what I was handing him, or noticed. He called me back when he arrived in a place with mobile reception and I told him about the whole affair and he said it's a good thing I accidentally paid him half because he didn't see the other abscess and failed to make the Anti-Pampe Knot 3000 so "it's a fair discount." So I got a half-price farrier visit thanks to Pampe (partly)... I won't tell her because she already thinks she's doing the world a favour by escaping (free fence integrity checks, free cardio training for me by forcing me to do interval running, free entertainment for everyone, plus her modest contribution to cosmic chaos.)

11am: I meant to take an "all's well that ends well" photo of the whole family but I realised Pampe is making her angry hammerhead shark face because her adventure was very short-lived and I didn't even take a picture of her escape, as I'd left my phone in my coat pocket under Pirlouit's tree (& supervision) when I went after her. (I figured I was about to run for 15min and would not need my heavy coat)

She thinks I did it on purpose to demoralise her by refusing to document her victories. But she's not giving up.