#don't worry im also supposed to be studying

[dashamanych]

Schoolkids AU art again!!!! More like clear references for the main trio 🫡.... Not putting hashtags again woop this au's fate in your hands fellas just let me know if it deserves to be seen by the rest of the fandom

Click here to read about AU!! thats the original post.

(just their names are written on top)

also want to note that there is some post-Soviet flavor in this AU, since I myself grew up in the CIS (RF particularly as you may know) and this is the closest and most native experience for me, but the idea of this AU is precisely nostalgia;;;!!! So the post-Soviet part is actually optional, perceive these elementary students through the prism of your childhood, that was my idea!

Also little sketch with sisters!!! :3 Winona here is a student who had transfer to correspondence studies to work and take care of her sister (she took custody of her, I suppose?)

"Winona My night light is broken Im afraid to sleep in the dark when are you coming??"

"Charlie, dear, i'm on shift, stay with the top lights on for now, I'll come home and fix it."

"but what about thu... Ut... Uthi...Utility bills?"

"Don't worry about that."

"...you sure?"

I think Willow changed a lot of schools

I have more art but iiii think ill share it in next post! See ya and thanks for support

[wolfiesmoon]

What a fate

Ran x good girl! reader

this is a part 2 to my fic "i can't sleep", dont worry i'm feeding ur families they will no longer starve. apparently people are really into ran considering how many notes that fic of mine got (and who can blame them honestly)

unrelated but i cant believe it took me this long to get into housewife radio by ghost i love the horror vibes because of course i do

You've had a turbulent few days recently. Ever since you agreed to do that stupid dare Ran hasn't left you alone.

He did promise to do so but you didn't think he was actually serious about "making you his". How could you let this happen?

Things turned out completely opposite to what you expected, though. Instead of dragging you to his gang meeting to beat the crap out of you, he's taking you there to threaten his lackeys that if they even so much as lay a finger on his girl (you), they'd feel hell on earth.

You suppose that it's nice that he wants to protect you but you feel extremely out of place and uncomfortable at a gang meeting of all places.

Your parents think you're studying at a library right now. Somehow, you feel like you're commiting a crime.

You also met his brother at that meeting.

It seems being a good-for-nothing delinquent runs in their family. You feel sorry for their parents. If they even have them.

"Wow, I would've never thought the nerd would be your type." Rindou teased Ran. Actually, maybe it was both of you he was teasing.

"She's the one that kissed me first." Ran smirked at you.

"You're the worst. Both of you." you furrowed your brows, not finding either of them amusing in the slightest.

"Your girlfriend hates you, man. Personally I would not put up with that." Rindou seemed disinterested, checking his nails as he said that.

"I am not his girlfriend, either!" you defended yourself but Ran just looked at you like he pitied you and Rindou looked like he didn't believe you.

"Right, okay, if you say so. You two have your lover's quarrel on your own. I'm going elsewhere." Rindou just casually left, leaving you all alone with Ran in an abandoned storage unit. Oh boy.

"Umm, I should get going- ack!" you felt your wrist getting grabbed, preventing you from leaving. There's your only exit up in smoke.

"Leaving so soon? But we haven't even had our fun yet." Ran smiled at you and you honestly felt scared at that moment. Oh no, you shouldn't have yelled back at him so daringly just now. Now he's going to beat the crap out of you and drop you off in front of your parents doorstep as a warning to never mess with his gang again.

He leaned in closer and you braced yourself for the pain, but instead of that you felt his lips on yours.

Kissing...?! Again?! Well, atleast it's better than a punch to the face... You can't believe it's come to a point where you're glad to get kissed by Ran.

But still, does he have to kiss you in the least romantic place possible? Even if you did have feelings for him you'd totally find this moment cringy.

"You suck at kissing." He comments heartily, pulling away.

"I'm not the one who kisses a new girl every day. Maybe I actually have some self-respect." You crossed your arms. He was your first kiss after all.

"Every night is an exaggeration. It's like, every week." You couldn't tell if he was joking or being serious, even if you saw his expression.

"Oh, wow. Glad to know that I'll get cheated on in about 3 days. Way to make your 'girlfriend' hate you less."

"I'll stop for you." He smiled.

"Uh huh, whatever." You rolled your eyes.

Though, his kisses are actually kind of making you.... No, no! Don't fall for that! You can't believe you almost admitted that you'd fall for him if he kissed you more.

.

"How's it going with your new boyfriend, girl?"

"God, do not call him that." You held your forehead in frustration.

"I think he's taken a liking to you." Your friend nudged you, pointing at Ran who was sitting on the other side of the cafeteria and smiling at you as he ate.

"Great." You said sarcastically, immediately looking away when your eyes met.

"See? It ended up well. Now you have a hot bad boy boyfriend." Your friend kinda wished she'd done it instead of daring you.

"Didn't I just... ugh! I don't think my parents would agree with you." You placed your forehead on the table, groaning. "You date him if you want a bad boy so bad. But I hate you for dragging me into this." Your voice was slightly muffled.

"Yeah, we'll see. You'll be the happiest couple ever in like, two months."

You raised your head, looking back at Ran once again. You're in quite the pickle, aren't you? The next thing you know, you'll fall for Haitani Ran.

How scarily exciting.

.

"Hop on." Ran stopped on his bike in front of the library. How he knew you had a study session there today? Don't worry about the details.

Another motorcycle ride... You feel like you barely survived the last one.

"My parents expect me to be home in 10 minutes." You crossed your arms. You weren't lying, either.

"Who cares? Live a little." Ran rolled his eyes playfully. Clearly he isn't going to let you back down.

"I'll do it, but only if you keep it to ten minutes." He was right, backing down isn't your thing. You wonder how much resisting him you could get away with if you weren't special to him.

Special to him... huh.

"Killjoy." He insulted you lightly as you sat down in front of him. Again, neither of you are wearing a helmet. This is the last time you'll let it slide.

"I prefer to not get scolded endlessly." You held onto him tightly because you knew what was coming and didn't want to almost fall off the bike again. He felt proud when you held onto him like that.

Like you're finally his. To be honest, he didn't really care much for you until you kissed him out of nowhere like that. How bold of you, the top-of-the-class rule stickler. But he likes that. And that's why he decided to make you his.

Isn't the fact that he lets you ride on his motorcycle enough to see that?

You felt the wind blowing against your face as you set off. Now that you feel it again, it doesnt feel too bad. It's kind of nice, actually. And Ran is warm, too.

The scenery moves past the two of you and strangely, you feel really calm and at peace. It feels like your parents don't exist in this moment and that you can just... live, and feel the adrenaline of the high speed.

This is so scarily exciting.

"You look relaxed." He said, looking down at you.

"I am. And look at the road, will you?" You scolded him but your voice was still relaxed. You look up at him again.

He actually isn't that bad looking. You kind of understand why some girls would fall for him. You, on the other hand...

Are unfortunately befalling the same fate.

He didn't say anything but you had a feeling he knew you were staring.

"You look like you're in love."

"What?! How would you even know?!" You looked back at the road, hiding your face from him. You can't help but get defensive of such a thing.

God, you hate that he's right.

[gaylordscooter]

[A pile of carefully torn-out pages sit stacked neatly inside a drawer]

entry number 1

I've lost everything. my brother, my friends, my house, my universe. all of it is just gone now

to top things off, the last thing i was doing was running away from temmie. i thought they were my friend, but after they got the six human souls somehow, they went on a rampage and started killing the remaining monsters left and right.

the only reason i escaped was because this otherworldly being dragged me through a body of water and brought me somewhere else.

this being's name is ink, they're a skeleton like me—they even look like me.

It was explained to me that my universe shattered from "too many plot holes" and i didn't know what that meant! what do you mean my world has too many "plot holes" it's not like it's a STORY.

WELL APPARENTLY IT IS A STORY. AND I DONT LIKE THINKING ABOUT THAT FOR TOO LONG.

So anyway, alternate realities are in fact real and there's a whole multiverse. Cool. Awesome. I just want to go home and for everything to go back to normal

But apparently my universe is completely gone, it doesn't exist i'm the only thing that remains from it. while there are some universes that have parallel realities mine was the only one if it's kind.

COOL. AWESOME. I'M BEING NORMAL ABOUT THIS.

IM THE ONLY THING THAT REMAINS OF MY UNIVERSE. MY UNIVERSE DOESNT EVEN EXIST ANYMORE. WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO GO. WHAT DO I EVEN DO? THIS "INK" PERSON IS WEIRD

When I was freaking out about my universe being GONE, he gave me this notebook and pencil to "calm down"

HOW IS THIS SUPPOSED TO CALM ME DOWN?! NOW I'M VENTING TO A NOTEBOOK WHILE HE STANDS THERE WATCHING ME FURIOUSLY WRITE!

entry number 2

It's been a day since my world was destroyed, I already miss my home. I've been missing my friends and brother.

At least Ink let me stick around. I've been staying at his place along with someone else named Dream, but I have yet to meet him since he's never here. It's comfy here, at least. I even have my own room (which looks suspiciously close to my old room actually. i think ink did that on purpose, maybe to cheer me up? i don't understand him).

Right now's around the time I'd study with Undyne, actually...well. at least i don't have to worry about getting into the royal science division.

Papyrus isn't around to read this. I feel bad that I've never told him this, but

I never really wanted to join the Royal Science Division. Even though I acted like it was my dream, it wasn't. I wanted to learn more about space.

but of course that's not possible when you live in the underground. (i guess that's not really a problem anymore? this doesn't make me happy)

and we've always been low on funds. the pay for it was too good to pass up. I've stolen so much just to keep us afloat. I was good at hiding that, though.

Too good. Maybe I should've told Papyrus once he was old enough. He never knew why I was kicked out...

How would I even tell him? There's so much I haven't, because I don't know how to word it.

"By the way, brother! Mom and dad didn't exactly like me 'trying to be someone who i'm not' and disowned me like i disowned my name! That's why we grew up in a scrapyard."

[there are various scribbles and dots here]

"You didn't have to follow me, y'know. you could've lived with them instead of stubbornly staying by my side it would've been easier"

no i wouldve missed him. even if it's selfish i'm glad he tagged along. he was always there for me

i wish i could say the same. I SHOULD be able to say the same but i CANT what poor excuse of a brother am i?

maybe. no. they'll never be right.

entry number 3

I met Dream for the first time. He's really. unique. I know he's dressed like someone straight out of an anime but I didn't expect him to ACT like someone straight out of an anime!

The way he talks, the way he moves. There's something uncanny about it, honestly. He also looks on the brightside like that's the only direction he can look. When he heard my universe was destroyed? Told me at least he's glad it's led to me meeting him and Ink??

Like No Offense To You Two But I Don't Think Losing My Entire Universe Was Worth Meeting You Two.

That's not to say I'm not glad to meet them! I am glad! Just not at the expense of my home and everyone I love!

wait when have i ever watched anime? where did i even learn what that means? it was one of my friends—or acquaintances that introduced me to it, surely. Why can't I remember?

I need to ask Ink something, maybe. hopefully he'll know.

entry number 4

so a consequence of my world shattering is that it's really easy to forget about it. because it doesn't exist.

after ink told me that, i can hardly remember anything about it.

it's like there's a big gap in my memory and all i remember is that i'm forgetting something.

like my scarf. i know there's a sentimental reason i wear it. there was something about it. something about the material it's made out of i think?

Entry number five

i had a brother his name is papyrus

i had a brother his name is papyrus

his name is papyrus. he's my younger brother

don't forget him. don't mistake him for the other papyruses in the multiverse.

he woreWhat did he wear? what was he Like? oh my god what was he like

papyrus. don't forget him. he isn't like the other papyruses in the multiverse don't use them as a point of reference don't let them replace whatever memories you have left of him.

"he isn't like the other papyrus's" HOW CAN I KNOW THAT FOR SURE? I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT HE WAS LIKE

entry number 6

The more I learn about the multiverse the more my memories of my universe are skewed. Also I learned (or, heh, remembered) I have memory issues in general on Top of the whole "universe not existing means it's hard to remember" thing.

So that's great

I was being a bit of a downer because of the revelation and Ink caught on so he asked me what was up. I decided to tell him, even though I thought he wouldn't really get it since he doesn't seem to be bothered by anything ever.

Oh man was I wrong. He completely understands

He also has memory issues. He told me he was soulless—which wow, I'm surprised he felt comfortable telling me—which really messes with your capacity for remembering things.

Even though he uses paint as a substitute for a soul, it doesn't fix his memory issues. So instead he writes stuff down on his scarf. He suggested I should do something similar, write down important things.

He told me that even if I can't necessarily hold information in my head for a long time, if I can hold it in my head long enough to write it down, that's enough.

It was reassuring.

entry number 7

Dear Papyrus,

I've seen a lot of different places in the past few days, places I wouldn't ever imagine seeing. Some of them are pretty, some of them are a mess. It's a bit hard to wrap my head around it, how small we are in comparison.

I already thought space was big, learning there were multiple universes made me feel even smaller. But even so, out of everything I've seen. I have yet to find a world like ours.

But if the universe is infinite, the amount of multiverses should be too, right? Another version of our universe, one that hasn't disappeared, has to be somewhere.

I'll look for it.

I'll find it.

I don't want to pretend to be talking to you through letters. I want to see you again. There's so much I have to tell you.

All the lies I've told you. I thought I was protecting you. I was really just saving myself the trouble of explaining everything.

i miss you, bro. i'm sorry i'm the one that made it and not you

entry number 8

i lived in a house with papyrus in snowland sity. i remember it was spelled like that specifically for the sake of alliteration, even though it'd still count as alliteration if it was spelled properly anyway.

i was an intern for the royal science division, papyrus was too but he wasn't all that serious about it. i was friends with the head of it, undyne.

she was real big into gundam anime and tried making those mechs a reality. i helped her with that so i have some experience in robotics and mechanical engineering.

she was able to build at least one functional robot, their name was blookbot. they were the underground's biggest music artist. i was a pretty big fan of their music

i went to college and got a degree in psychology. i was supposed to go to medical school, but, i either failed my classes or didn't make it in i think. or maybe i couldn't afford it.

there were a few humans that lived underground, under queen toriel's care. she had a polices about not killing humans which some monsters didn't agree with, including her own (now ex) husband who thought she was prioritizing humans above her own people. technically she was prioritizing humans, in a way, since we kinda need their souls to break the barrier—but hey all those humans fell down as kids im not gonna blame her for deciding against killing. and those humans specifically weren't to blame for us being trapped underground, it was unfair to fault them for it.

there was a group of monsters that did take action against these policies. the rebels, they called themselves. it was a straightforward name. they managed to kill some of the humans that's fallen down, specifically the ones that decided to leave the safety of queen toriel in favor of finding a way out.

while the amount of monsters that were apart of the rebels was pretty low, there's always been a threat of a civil war over the queen's policies. the main thing preventing it was that everyone was very much aware that a civil war could spell the end of monsterkind. so the monsters that disagreed with her policies kinda just, went deeper into the underground and were left to their own devices.

temmie was my friend. i thought. they were...a peculiar being. not quite human or monster, they were a sentient plush toy. they were very vocal about thinking queen toriel was dumb for not just killing every human that fell underground and that if she did, we'd have enough souls to break the barrier by now. but to my knowledge the rebels only have two souls in their possession and there's five that live with queen toriel. we'd be missing one

hah! i remembered all that! fuck you, multiverse!

hopefully this information is accurate. god

entry number 9

MY NAME IS NOT BLUE. ITS SANS HOW THE HELL DID I FORGET THAT???

Ever since my universe was destroyed Ink's been calling me "blue" like that's been my name my whole life and i ended up forgetting that it's NOT!

GASLIGHTING! ME!

Only reason i remembered was because someone called me sans while we went out to a different universe to eat.OH YEAH SPEAKING OF THIS UNIVERSE

It's SIMILAR to mine, not quite the same but it feels much more familiar than the other ones have so far

they're called "Underswap" universes, because some people "swap" roles and personalities with someone else.

Ink calls my universe "Botchedswap". not that flattering of a name but i suppose it makes sense now that ive seen underswap

so like. is my universe just a "botched" version of that universe?? or variant, that's what ink calls them

variants are universes that derive similar traits to the "main" universe they're based off of. so like, botchedswap is an underswap variant since it's based on it. BUT WHO IS BASING IT ON UNDERSWAP? WHAT EXACTLY DOES THAT MEAN? IS SOMEONE WRITING THIS? IT'S A STORY. THATS WHAT INK TOLD ME

i haven't really thought about how this is all a story after ink told me. i've kinda been avoiding it. it's like my mind automatically yanking my hand away from the stove, it's hard to think about it

i guess im sorta not supposed to know about that?? i mean. this is like some horrors beyond my comprehension probably. definitely, what the fuck do i mean probably?

so if this IS a story. i'm a character in it then? I'm probably a background character aren't i? i probably hardly even show up. who's the main character? would it be ink? oh then i probably wouldn't be a background character at that point.

That's so weeeird. If i was a main character that'd mean a lot of people saw my every move! Horrible! Or i guess not, why should i care what the hypothetical audience thinks about me?

Geez, there is an audience, isn't there? Unless this story's private or something.

I'm writing something down right now and im in a story. That's pretty weird. What if I wrote a story then? That's a story in a story, would that make that story more fictional than me?

wow im a fictional character.

The dread's not really hitting. Is that because i'm unable to or because i actually don't care that much? Is the writer of the story controlling my every move. What does this say about my capacity for free will. What does this say about everyone who isn't "on-screen"?

WELL. GOING OFF THE IDEA THAT I AM NOT A MAIN CHARACTER. THAT MEANS IM NOT BEING WRITTEN ABOUT THEN. WHICH MEANS THE WORLD DOES CONTINUE ON EVEN WHEN THEY AREN'T IN THE STORY.

OK MAYBE THE DREAD IS HITTING. IS THE AUDIENCE LOOKING AT ME RIGHT NOW? CUT THAT OUT!

WOWZERS, I AM A FICTIONAL CHARACTER. ok what do i do with this information. this is weird. im not supposed to know this right? well, ink told me so i guess it's allowed???

quick write something to show i have free will. uhhh what was that saying. from uhhh that one human. rene descartes?? is that how you spell his name. there's an accent on there somewhere

cogito, ergo sum

yeaaahhh yeah. i leaned that phrase from my philosophy class. i dont fucking remember what that means, go me

entry number 10

Wowzers, it's been a second since i opened this thing up! Welp, I'm in a much better spot now. Kinda embarrassing reading back on these entries now.

These are pretty personal too. I don't really wanna continue writing entries like this, I was never big on diaries cus I hate reading back on them.

So I ripped these pages out! I can't just waste the rest of this journal, the paper's pretty good quality. plus it's a gift from ink technically

But I can't just toss these pages out so I'm putting them in my bedside drawer. I'll probably forget I did that so this is sorta like a time capsule, I suppose.

So if i have rediscovered these pages, Hi! Hello! Future, hopefully-even-more-well-adjusted-me! Probably shouldn't destroy these pages because they have important memories written down in them! Push past the cringe of seeing me in agony! Or rewrite some of the key stuff, i dunno.

If you are not Blue, Sans-from-Botchedswap The Skeleton,

FUCK OFFF!!!! BARK BARK BARK BARK!! STOP READING THISSSS IT'S EMBARRASSING COME OOON. or hi ink, i told you NOT TO SNOOP IN MY ROOM!!!

On the off-chance you are not from my plane of existence, uhhh I guess i can't stop you? And i guess i shouldn't care since i won't see your reaction nor can you tell anyone about this so. whatever. go at it, voyeur.

not the right word to use sorry. yeah no. wrong word. not what it means.

See this is why it sucks knowing there's an audience what if i say weird shit!?!? Ughhhh. probably shouldn't care about it, but alas, my feeble soul, i am sensitive that even the possibility of the hypothetical audience thinking im weird hurts me so

[strawberries-and-racing]

i wanna be yours - mv1

pairing: max verstappen x fem!reader

requests that came together and inspired this series:

• nsfw prompts 9-13 (in pt. 2)

• 'listen up. Obsessive possessive crazy max for sweet innocent reader smut.'

• 'ok so we need dark FICS of any driver of your choice but make him very obsessive and possessive and don't forget the smut. Keep it up girlllll!!!'

summary: a lot of tension building between possessive max and sweet y/n.

warnings: alcohol consumption, fluff, slightly crazy max, some cliches (im sorry!) also the title is based off the arctic monkeys song because i felt like the vibes matched also i love arctic monkeys💕

a/n: screaming once again!!! this is the first fluff ive posted and it's part 1/2. the next part has the smut as promised but i wanted to take my time and build this up please enjoy🙏

the flight to the UK was long, but well worth it. two months ago you'd been offered an unbelievable opportunity.

an opportunity you'd been dreaming of for years, one you'd spent what felt like an eternity working towards— an engineering internship. not just any internship, one with the red bull formula one team.

you'd be able to travel with the team, shadow the engineers, help with various tasks around the paddock, and design parts at hq. an absolute dream.

after scouring a thousand real estate websites, you'd finally found the perfect place for to live.

a little 1 bed 1 bath apartment, tucked into a beautiful, quaint little neighbourhood. just 30 mins to the red bull hq.

you'd dedicated many late nights and ikea shopping trips to making the apartment your own. your comfortable escape from the grueling hours of studying and pressures of the internship.

you led a busy life, but it never bothered you. you adored what you did and formula one had been your passion since you were a little girl.

and now everything was falling into place. in fact, tommorrow you'd leave to attend your first race with the team. austria. red bulls home race.

you were ecstatic to say the least.

  °~•☆•♡•☆•~°

you hurriedly made your way through the paddock and into the red bull garage. your eyes glued to the schedule on top of the pile of papers in your arms.

you were on your way to assist one of the senior engineers in preparation before the race began.

you were nervous, and it was no help that you weren't exactly sure where you were supposed to be meeting him.

suddenly, you stumble over your own feet and bump into someone.

you feel hands on your shoulders, their grasp firm, steadying you.

you look up and are taken aback by the pair of strikingly blue eyes staring back at you. his eyes were the kind of crystal blue that would capture anyones attention. but despite their bright colour, they had a sort of inexplicable depth, darkness to them.

there was something in his expression that you couldn't quite read. something stirring beneath the surface of his icy gaze. it was as though he wasn't just looking at you, but into you.

you abruptly become aware of his hands, still on your shoulders. you're so oddly aware of them, as if it's your first time being touched by anyone.

he holds you firmly, as if trying to hold you together. the moment seemed to last forever. the two of you frozen in time.

a stranger's eye contact and touch shouldn't be affecting you in this way.

"you okay?"

it's only once he speaks that you realize who the man standing in front of you is.

your eyes widen, cheeks flushing. you straighten up quickly, mouth slightly agape.

"oh'" you start, at a loss for words "yeah, im sorry." you manage a small smile.

you straighten up an take a step backwards, pulling away from his grasp. you miss the warmth of his hands more than you'd ever like to admit.

"it's okay, no worries," his eyes linger on you a moment longer before you both go your separate ways.

as you walk away, you cant help but glance back at him.

max verstappen.

you'd certainly heard him speak before on tv, but something about his accent in person was enchanting. his energy seemed to linger on you like perfume.

everything about him caught your attention, long before you'd bumped into him in person.

you'd seen his dominance on track, it was impossible not to notice. he could control the car like no other driver, handling each corner perfectly. he pushed the car to the limit every race and it payed off.

it wasn't just his driving you noticed. his persona. it was everything. and you couldn't ignore the fact that it was sexy.

his short temper, his tendency to snap easily.

it was unreasonably and indescribably attractive.

  °~•☆•♡•☆•~°

the next time you see him he's across the room. you're studying the notes that the senior engineer gave you, papers and writing utensils spread across the table in front of you.

he was discussing something with his race engineer, he certainly wasn't doing anything that was particularly interesting or peculiar, he wasn't even looking in your direction. but for fucks sake you were distracted. you were somehow absorbed by his prescence.

ever since bumping into him you couldn't seem to get him out of your head. last night you'd replayed the memory over and over in your mind, finding it more difficult than usual to fall asleep.

all day, you'd silently prayed you would bump into eachother again. your relentless efforts to push your thoughts and feelings to the back of your mind were useless.

the mere idea of him was addictive, so alluring. he was drug-like to you and impossible to ignore.

although it was unknown to you at the time, max had found himself similarly hooked on you. or rather, the thought of you. even though he found enough strength to avoid looking at you, he was well aware of you. sitting at the table in the furthest corner. he was even more aware of the fact that your eyes kept flickering in his direction.

your energy was unlike anything he had ever known. you walked around with an aura of pure innocence. yet you seemed untouchable.

your smile shone. your laugh was contagious. you radiated sunshine. max had come to know these things about you.

you were magnetic in such a way that made him curious.

it stirred something inexplicable inside him. like you were another thing for him to win, to claim. another thing for him to dominant. to corrupt.

your innocence was tangible. and max wanted to be the one to wreck you. it was all he thought about.

ruining you.

  °~•☆•♡•☆•~°

the light in your apartment was soft. that's how you preferred it.

you relished your alone time. your small apartment was tailored exactly to you. it was always where you felt perfectly safe and at ease.

light from the sunset was just beginning to spill through your windows. you're stirring a big pot of soup on the stove with lazy motions.

a buzz from your phone catches your attention, the screen lights up and you see a new message. it's from andrew, one of the young engineers at red bull who you'd grown close with over the past few months.

your eyes widen upon reading the message.

a dinner with drivers? you couldn't deny that it sounded exciting.

but then again, you were already in your pajamas and the soup was beginning to steam.

you suck in a breath.

fuck.

the three letters of his name were more than enough to change your answer.

  °~•☆•♡•☆•~°

you spent half your time getting ready frantically choosing an outfit.

finally, you'd settled on your favorite black dress. your hair fell over your shoulders in soft curls left over from the day before.

now, you were standing outside the restaurant. you take a deep breath, trying to calm your nerves.

you walk in and the hostess greets you with a friendly smile. you're led to a booth connected to a big table that's only half full.

andrew waves you over and you take a seat next to him in the booth. lando sits across from you.

youd never spoken with lando outside of strictly professional context and you were pleasantly surprised by his charming humor. you're engrossed in the conversation with the two boys as the rest of the group fills the table. you look up to greet the others.

your breath hitches when you see him. his eyes stare into yours with the same intensity as they had two days ago. you don't break the eye contact until he sits down and a dark haired boy you've never seen before calls his name.

despite the abrupt rush of blood to your head, you manage to hold up the conversation with lando.

  °~•☆•♡•☆•~°

max couldn't keep his eyes off you for long, and the longer he watched the tighter his grip got on his glass, until his knuckles turned white. he was so focused on you laughing and smiling with lando that he didn't pick up on the way you fidgeted with your ring. a nervous tell.

max clenched his jaw as you leaned in close to something lando said. far closer than what many would deem an action between two casual friends. your giggles and blushing and landos knowing smirk and your hand jokingly smacking his arm made max see red.

"you alright, mate?"

"im fine."

  °~•☆•♡•☆•~°

as the night goes on and the chatter and laughter get louder, people begin shuffling around, moving to talk with new people.

lando is called over to a different group of friends and andrew leaves with him, leaving you alone in the booth.

"having fun?"

you recognize his voice immediately, sense his burning presence as he slides into the booth, sitting next to you.

"yeah." you manage a smile. "the food was really good."

"that's good." he says, briefly glancing away. your eyes involuntarily trace over the tendons of his neck.

he was wearing a dark button down, the sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. simple, but ridiculously sexy.

he turns his eyes back onto you. "i didn't know you were gonna be here."

"oh i—" you hesitate for a second, his eyes making your heart skip a beat.

"andrew invited me." you explained, turning slightly so you could face him.

"mm, so are you..." he gestures between you and andrew a few seats down, you know what hes asking.

"oh no, we're just friends." you toy with the edge of your napkin.

it was a bold topic to bring up during a first conversation to say the least, but it didn't feel weird. there wasn't the usual tension, usual coldness that typically came with talking to someone for the first time. it was comfortable, you were able to relax a little.

"hm." is all max answers with. he spreads his legs slightly and pushes his hips forwards, getting comfortable. his leg brushing against yours.

the casual action had your heart thrumming in your ears, beating so loudly you're worried he can hear it.

you swallow, having to glance away. you feel your cheeks turning red.

why max verstappen had such an intense effect on you was still a mystery.

"so um—" you start, trying to make some small talk that would distract you from his arm that now rested on the ledge behind you. you take a breath, composing yourself before speaking. "how often do you guys do this kind of thing?"

he shifted again, his leg touching yours, but he doesn't pull it away this time. the knot of nerves in your stomach tightened. you felt your face turn even redder. the physical contact made your body ache for more.

max smirked, his ego swelling as he saw the effect he had on you.

"once in a while, usually after a race." 

you nod, biting your lip.

"congratulations by the way." you say, it wasn't surprising he'd taken first yet again, but you said it anyways. you prayed he wasn't able to pick up on the way your words came out slightly shaky.

you wanted to do nothing more than relax into him, but with the way he was looking at you that proved to be impossible.

you took a sip of your wine, desperate to cool down as an unexpected surge of heat washed over you which lingered between your legs.

max was different than anyone you'd ever talked too before. he reminded you of nobody. his sense of humor was unique and hilarious.

as the conversation continued you grew immensely fond of the dutchman sitting beside you. although you were absorbed in the stories from his childhood he told you, you remained acutely aware of how close the two of you were now sitting.

max's night couldn't have been unfolding more perfectly. your body language made your thoughts and feelings painfully obvious.

he picked up on the way you blushed immensely at any slight touch from him. the way your pupils dilated as you stared at him. the goosebumps that spread across your chest when he complimented your dress.

but the loudness of the restaurant was a little too much for him. there were too many people here. he craved something more intimate, more private.

"do you wanna get out of here?"

you're caught off guard by his words.

the question was so cliche, yet coming from his mouth it made your heart throb.

"there's a beautiful view not too far from here," he continued, "we could walk?"

his voice was like velvet and he leaned in close, speaking in a low tone as if he didnt want anyone to hear except you.

by now, you're practically having heart palpitations. the pit in your stomach gapes wider.

it was already hard enough for you to keep your sanity intact with him while surrounded by other people. you honestly aren't sure if you could handle being out alone with him.

you nod slowly your head spinning, breathe quickening.

"oh, yeah i'd love that." your voice was unsteadt, yet enthusiastic.

without another word he starts getting up, but before he slips out of the booth he gently touches your leg with his hand, as if reassuring you.

his fingers may as well have been made of hot metal, his touch affected your entire body, his fingerprints burned into your skin.

you felt like a little kid with a crush as you gingerly got up and followed max out of the restaurant, butterflies in your stomach and in your mind.

you don't notice all the eyes on you two as you leave the restaurant, too caught up in the giddiness you were feeling. your own eyes too focused on max in front of you, more specifically on his back which looked so good in that damn shirt.

max, on the other hand, was well aware of all the eyes on him. he fought to keep his cocky grin at bay. there were at least 20 other people there, and out of everyone, you were leaving with him.

he opens the door and lets you by first.

"thank you," you say, the night air cooling your overheated body.

"of course."

amongst the ever present—extremely active— butterflies that fluttered in your stomach, you felt a twinge of genuine nervousness.

you realize that you had just left a restaurant, alone at night, with a guy you technically barely knew. was this safe?

it certainly felt safe. max felt nothing like a stranger.

your nervousness melted away once max fell into step beside you. you looked up at him, at those intense blue eyes.

you were walking so close your arms touched. you had the urge to reach out and take his hand, but of course you didn't.

so there you were, walking alongside max verstappen into the dark night, to see the promised beautiful view.

you'd only walked two blocks before max carefully took your hand in his, entwining his fingers with yours.

please let me know if you want to be tagged for pt.2 (this might end up being three parts)❤

[sanspuppet]

𝐃𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦 𝐁𝐨𝐬𝐬 - 𝐘𝐮𝐧𝐡𝐨 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

PAIRING: Yunho x fem!reader

RATING: smut (18+ MDNI)

W/T: colleagues to lovers, unprotected sex (do not), kinda rough sex, overstimulation, choking, mention of toys, creampie, pet names (doll, princess)

A/O: i want to thank @yuyusbunny for proofreading this fanfiction (i hope the next ones too) and helping me improving myself, lov u Laz 🫶🏻🫶🏻.

𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾𐬿𐬾

You were now walking down the street, your eyes clinging to your phone, searching for the nearest way to reach the bar that hired you the day before. You were messing with your left hand nervously, as you were trying to imagine your first day of work.

"It's very famous to be a bar, what if im not meant for it? Nah... they say the owner is very kind... i hope so."

Your best friend Jongho found this job for you, knowing that you were searching desperately for one, he was also a noticed costumer there, so when he mentioned you, it was almost like you were instantly accepted. Honestly you weren't into locals, that one was very well known in town, but you've never went there. A few minutes later, you were facing the entrance of the bar, the led writing with the name of it, as an attractor of attention. Flower, tiny trees and bonsais were decorating the outside, even if the local was recently open that morning, most of the tables were occupied by the people, drinking their coffees and eating something for breakfast.

"There it is..." you entered, hesitant, looking for your boss.

"Uhm... hello? Is there... a Jeong Yunho? Im y/n, the new employee." you asked at the bartender. He looked at you from head to toes, his smile making him look easily approachable.

"Oh, y/n! We finally meet, Jongho told me of you a few times. Wait a second, imma look for Yunho."

You leaned on your elbow on the counter, and tapped your fingers on the wood, while looking at the inside of the local. Soon after, you saw the figure of a tall man, heading towards you.

"Good morning."

you turned your head, looking at him. His low voice almost scared you for a second, despite his puppy eyes studying you. Meanwhile, you were already struggling to keep yourself composed:

"Shit, i didn't expect him to be this hot."

His black shirt, slightly unbottoned, was revealing his collarbones, and what it seemed the shadow of a tattoo.

"And he is supposed to be a barista??"

His cheekbones popped out when he smiled at you, revealing his sweet attitude.

"Im Yunho! Your boss, but i hope we'll get closer in the future, i'd like to be friends with my employees, if it doesn't bother you." You shaked your head, smiling back:

"Absolutely not! my name's y/n."

"My pleasure, come here, i'll teach you the work."

The day went great, the tasks were pretty easy, and you loved the chill mood created in that local, lounge bar music relaxing you and the costumers as they were waiting for you to serve their order. The only problem was that, everytime your boss was in your vicinity, checking you or just asking you to do something, your mind always blocked at his sight. No need to say because of his hotness, out of tune with his sweet personality, you'd say he's the perfect man.

"Y/n, can you come here?" you nodded and headed towards him, behind the counter.

"Yeah?"

"I need to teach you how to make coffee. You can't just be a waitress, right?" Yunho chuckled.

"Uhm... yeah, i think."

"Don't worry, it's pretty easy. We use instant coffee."

He turned, giving you his back, and took a few sticks containing the coffee mixture. Once he turned to look at you, he handed you one, smiling. Until that moment you didn't realize his hands, god his hands... slender, bony and veiny, his nails well taken care of. You shuddered when they made contact with yours, shivers running down your spine, fighting not to let yourself be carried away by your own thoughts, dirty thoughts.

"You have to pour the mixture in the cup." he gave you one, so you could copy his movements. You were quite slow in all you were doing, mind only focused on his long fingers, doing their job. You seemed... lost, or simply confused.

"y/n? you alright?" he asked, trying to figure out why you were so worked up from that easy tutorial. He then held the cup in front of your face, two fingers wrapped around the base of it. "You have to pour the boiled water slightly above two fingers, understand?"

"Wha- Oh, yes, yeah." you shook your head, trying to kick those pretty hands away from your mind.

"Then you keep stirring it until it looks good, easy right?"

"Yeah..."

Yunho grimaced, tilting his head to one side. He moved his hands on your shoulders, his fingers gripping at you. He then dragged them down your arms, slowly.

"You're so hot y/n." he whispered, his warm breath reaching your sensitive skin.

"W-what?" you felt your heartbeat accelerating from just that simple, innocent sentence. You looked at him, already panicking. He moved his right hand on your forehead, your mind was going to go on stend-by, from the feeling of him softly caressing it. You were surely developing the fattest crush you'd ever had, on him, your boss.

"You sure you're feeling good? i think you probably have a fever, your skin seems burning."

"Why does he have to be so handsome and adorable at the same time??" you said to yourself, unable to focus on his words, given his aphrodisiac beauty.

"Look at your cheeks, they're of a burning red." he caressed them, his thumb brushing the corner of your lips.

"It's because of you, dumbass." You moved your sight on his puppy eyes, probably unsuspecting the effects that his touch were giving to you.

"No, im okey." you murmured finally. Yunho moved his hands off of your body, and started to put away all of the stuff positioned on the counter.

"Uhm, anyways... the local is going to close soon, you can go for now if you want to."

You nodded, and made your way towards the door, almost forgetting it was made of glass... Well, not almost, because you bumped into it, making Yunho laugh.

The next days, and weeks, went similar: you simply did your new job. Went to work at late morning and got home at 7 p.m. You got used to that routine, you were well paid and had good company, perhaps the presence of your boss was what definitively convinced you to stay... hell ya, you were pretty sure he was the principal cause. Everyday he somehow found the way to touch you, making your insides fall apart in every single case: he'd move you away by grabbing your waist when he has to pass nearby, hold your hand when he'd accompany you to the back of the bar, or when you'd have your new nails done to get a closer sight, he also complimented your look every morning. In short: or he was the gentleman in person, or he was just clingy, or he also was infatuated by your simple existence. (No need to say that the last one was the one you hoped for so bad). At the end, you really became friends, after days of you joking and laughing together during work.

𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺𐬺

"y/n, i was wondering something." he broke the silence between you two, when he turned his head to face you, behind the counter where you were waiting for new costumers to come. You were quite nervous everytime you were alone with him: your foot kept beating on the floor.

"Uh-huh?" you murmured, focusing on the people sitting in front of you, both for not thinking of Yunho too much, and to make sure they were satisfied with your service.

"Today is Monday, right? So tomorrow we're open by the afternoon" his gaze glued to your pretty side profile.

"Yeah, i know" the feeling of his eyes sticking at you made your legs dizzy. "What's his purpose?" you thought.

"Wanna hang out later?"

"Oh no, he didn't-" you weren't mentally prepared to spend an entire evening with him, another touch from him and you were sure you'd fall on your knees for him, dick straight choking your throat. "Holy shit... and now?"

"Sure..." you couldn't deny, right? the worst thing that could have happened was that nothing would happen. In facts, you surely wanted him to just grab your hips and fuck you already. What? he couldn't just wear those skinny jeans and "accidentally" press his bulge against your ass, without expecting you to get horny. he was a freaking bastard in those moments, or he was dumb, or he liked the way you blushed and had your heart freaking out everytime he touched you, what a sadistic bastard. Yeah... you were definitely losing your mind, you craved for that man like a drugged craves for his drugs.

"Perfect! Give me your address, imma pick you up later, what about 8 p.m?" he took his phone, ready to take notes.

"shit, he's gonna enter my house"

"Uhm yeah, wait a second..."

A few hours later you were struggling to choose what to wear, still half naked from the shower you just took, hands grabbing dozens of dresses to look at them, trying to figure out which one to wear.

"if he told me at least where we're going..."

"should i wear just something cool?" "and if we go to a multi-star restaurant? i should be elegant..." "and if he takes me to his place?"

you suddenly heard the doorbell ringing, Yunho's voice speaking through the entryphone: "y/n? are you there?"

"duh... really??" you picked the first dress that caught your attention, wearing it while heading towards the principal door, you fixed your hair before opening it.

"Oh, here you are." he smiled at your presence.

"I need to do my make-up, it'll take a few minutes, come inside." you moved to one side, making him able to enter the house. He followed you till your bedroom, taking a look of the furniture, instead you entered the bathroom minding your own business. While you were putting on your mascara, you were staring at the reflection of Yunho through your mirror, and finally noticed how simply gorgeous Yunho looked: the smoking suit he was wearing fitted perfectly his slender body, the dark blue waist coat adhering to his chest. You lost yourself again inside your thoughts, your hands automatically moving and the figure of Yunho was only present in your mind. Once you got back to reality and exited your bathroom, you saw him sat on your bed, holding what seemed to be the buzzing toy you used to use during your desperate nights, and coincidentally, the night before was one of them. He was looking at it intensely, turning it around to see every detail. When he saw the small button he couldn't help but click it, making the vibrator starting to do what it was supposed to.

"Oh" a small whimper left his mouth as the toy he was holding started vibrating.

"No. nonono, fuck-" you ran towards him, intent on taking back what was yours.

"Give me that, Yunho." you took the vibration from his hands, holding it like it was your most intimate treasure.

"Uhm im sorry, i sat down and felt it under the blanket, didn't mean it." his innocent gaze turned quickly into a smirk, he leaned back on his elbows facing you while his body rested on the soft mattress of your bed, his legs open. "Didn't expect you to use that kind of stuff."

"I don't..." you tried to say, despite you perfectly knew that you sucked at lying.

"It's still wet." he chuckled, seeing your eyes widening, full of embarrassment, no wonder why your cheeks were of an intense red, and it surely wasn't because of your make-up. "Uhm-" you murmured, trying to think of a good lie this time.

"Don't lie to me, princess. You're a woman, it's normal to need some pleasure, right? Only thinking that looking at you, you'd easily get something way better than a vibrator."

You raised one eyebrow, asking again to yourself what were his wills: "What do you mean, huh?"

"Don't know, want me to prove it?" his smirk getting wider as he noticed you on the verge of your denial resistance.

"For now? No thanks im good with it."

"seriously? i had the chance to take him and i just wasted it? God, im so stupid." you wanted to slap your face right there, refusing yourself to believe what you just refused.

"Well, if you say so. Come on now, the restaurant is waiting for us."

He brought you to a famous italian restaurant, thank goodness that you were wearing an elegant dress, which as always Yunho complimented:

"You look so beautiful in that dress, the color matches your eyes perfectly." he said, when you both finished your dinner. The situation was quite embarrassing: you were constantly making eye contact, but not a single word leaving your mouth, expect a small murmur:

"Thank you, you're also very handsome..."

You didn't know if what happened at your house was only a joke, or his attempt to approach you, whatever it was, his previous proposal was now torturing your mind. After thinking of it a little too much you finally chose to just ignore it, and tried to enjoy some good time with Yunho.

"Oh God... he's drunk" you looked at his red face, chuckling while taking other sips of wine, his sight seemed fogged as he was trying hard to focus on your face when you talked:

"Yunho, you should stop drinking."

He laughed out loud, almost losing his balance, sat on his chair: "i can't! im so happy!"

"Why?" you asked, confused.

"Because i finally asked you to hang out with me!" he smiled, before standing up, already on the verge of falling, you stood up and immediately wrapped his arm around your waist, yours on his shoulder, helping him to walk straight. Your legs were shaking too, not because of the alcohol, but for the feeling of Yunho's finger gripping at your body, which drove you crazy. A smirk was continuously placed on his face, his head resting on the top of yours, as you were accompanying him to his car. You asked for its keys and sat in the driver's seat. You didn't know his address and because he was drunk he couldn't remember it, so you drove to your house. You were in your bathroom brushing your teeth and getting ready to go to sleep, once you got out, you found him already sleeping on you bed. You headed towards him, and knelt down to look at his tired face.

"He looks so cute... wait- and now? where do i sleep??"

You looked around, despite you hadn't another bed at your place, and there was no way you'd sleep on the floor, excluding your mini couch. You had no choice but to lay on your bed, staring at Yunho till collapsing from your tiredness.

The morning after, you woke up at the sunrise, when you turned your head to look for Yunho, you're heart almost stopped at the sight of his face a few inches from yours. His soft cheeks resting on the pillow made him look adorable. That moment felt perfect, until you moved your gaze down his body, and noticed his crotch pressing against the fabric of his pants, as if it wanted to escape from them, you widened your eyes, amazed:

"Jeez- he's pretty big..." you murmured, and suddenly frozen hearing Yunho yawning, having just woke up.

"what did you say, y/n? Wait... why am i laying on your bed?! W-what happened yesterday??" he immediately stood up, panick rushing inside his body.

"Nothing, you were drunk so i took you to my place."

He looked down at the feeling of his pants tightening, and gasped, knowing that you probably noticed it too, he moved his gaze at you nervously, then chuckled shyly:

"Uhm well... i should go now and take care of... the bar" he squeezed his eyes and sighed: "Yeah, the bar..."

𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼𐬽𐬼

The next weeks went as usual, just working and drooling secretly for your boss, handsome and kind as always. You were now sure that you loved him, what you kept asking to yourself was if he felt the same for you. And how could you prove that? Teasing him. Usually he was the one that "involuntarily" teased you in many ways. So you finally decided to test the waters, pretending to act normal as you were voluntarily driving him crazy. You actually acted like an annoying slut in his presence, rubbing yourself against him in every occasion, walking sensually, sure that his gaze was glued to your ass, sometimes you even vaguely flirted with cute costumers just to get him jealous. After only a week, you could tell that he was extremely on the verge of losing his patience.

It was late October, outside was raining hard and the bar was completely empty of people, just you and Yunho. He was looking intensely at you, while you were decorating a cupcake for fun, sometimes licking the cream off of your fingers joyfully. He sighed, arm crossed:

"Why you keep acting like this, huh?" he headed towards you, till he was just a few inches far from you.

"Like what?" you smirked at him.

"Like a slut, are you joking or just needy for cock? Tell me."

"Maybe both, don't know. Maybe i just need to get what im craving, don't you think?" Where did you even find that confidence all of a sudden? Was your whore side finally taking the control?

He got closer to you, the feeling of his heavy breath on your lips: "Uh-huh? And what do you crave so bad?"

you giggled, your heartbeat starting to accelerate: "Guess."

He sighed again, but this time a small smirk taking his way on his lips: "Come on doll, just stop joking around, i perfectly know you want me." he got closer, whispering at your right ear: "Just wondering why you didn't fuck me that night." You bit your lower lip, how many times you asked yourself the same question? "i don't even know, maybe you can ask me again to."

Yunho laughed, nodding. He took you in his arms, and make you sit on the counter, his hands on your sides to make you stay still. You could hear his heart pulsing quickly, yours was about to flutter, and the both of you inhaling deeply the air. He whispered again, his voice lower than ever:

"Wanna fuck, my beautiful?"

You chuckled: "who told you that im yours"

"Gonna mark you right now."

You whispered back: "Go on, then." Before he grabbed your waist and pulled you closer to him, kissing you passionately. Your tongues found their ways inside your mouths, his hands moving on every inch of your body, you could feel your skin burning under his touch. Thrill rushing in your blood as he sucked on your neck, leaving hickeys all over your sensitive skin, he was about to hike your t-shirt up when you stopped him:

"Yunho... the bar is open."

He rolled his eyes back and sighed: "Okey then, i'll bring you to my house, now." He took your hands, helping you to get down of the counter. He turned off the lights and the power of the place, you ran to his car while he was closing the bar. When you arrived, Yunho was already taking you in his arms, heading towards his bedroom. You giggled when he pinned you against the wall, him holding your wrist while you were stuck in a long, wet kiss. Small whimpers leaving your mouth, happy because you finally were trapped in his arms, horny because you were imagining what was coming next:

"Come on boss, teach me how to behave."

He groaned, looking intensely at your smirking face: "Oh fuck, i love when you call me that way" he sucked your earlobe, then murmured: "it gets me so hard, you can't even imagine." He gripped your waist, and throwed you onto the bed, leaving small kisses down your body, while he was dragging your clothes off of you, until you were completely naked. Shivers were running down your spine at the sudden cold feeling. He stood up, taking a complete look of your breathtaking body, his boner exposing his needs.

"God, you're soaking wet, all because of me." he chuckled, his chest expanding continuously as he was breathing heavily, while unbuttoning his shirt. Once he had only his boxers on, you were desperately begging him to go ahead: "please please please take them off..."

Yunho opened your legs, making room for himself. He pressed his bulge on your bare cunt, forcing you to whine annoyingly.

"You like when i tease you, don't you?"

"God im begging you please i need you inside me"

"Oh i see, should i give you what you want since you're acting so good for me?" he dragged down his underwear, his cock popping out, standing proudly: "Hmm?"

You kept nodding: "Yesyesyesyes-"

One hand held your thigh firmly as the other stroked his length a few times, preparing at the incoming pleasure he was about to feel. You arched your back when he finally pushed himself inside you, unbelievably hitting your g-spot with the first thrust:

"Fuck! Shit Yunho- s-so perfect..."

His hands were caressing your belly softly, unlike the way he was pumping in you roughly. He was too excited to finally have you, he couldn't contain himself and be gentle. No, he wanted to ruin your pretty hole so you would stop to seduce him and getting him hard during work.

"Now that you're so whiny, do you still wanna tease me?" he stopped, knowing that it would drive you crazy. He felt your walls clenching intensely, signaling him that you were "so close so close- please keep it in!"

"You're already reaching your orgasm, doll?" his cockhead rubbing against your clit, enough for you to roll your eyes back and suddenly creaming your folds. You moaned loudly, you're voice broken after only a few minutes. He leaned on you, his hands caressing your collarbones, feeling your chest widening under his palm.

"Too bad, because i haven't yet."

Yunho wrapped his fingers around your neck, squeezing it enough for you to breathe but not to groan. You looked at him with desperate eyes, feeling your soul almost leaving your body because of the overwhelming pleasure.

"i'll be forced to give you some days off, you're not going to walk for a week"

You wrapped both of your hands around his wrist, helping yourself to stay still while he was pressing you against the mattress. Every single thrust felt like heaven, there was no way he could be a virgin, he knew every spot where you needed to be touched. Yunho was also pretty loud during sex, your pussy fitted him perfectly, so much that he became addicted to it within the first minute. A mix of low and high moans were leaving his mouth constantly, he threw his head back once he felt his climax getting closer.

"Fuck you're so perfect for me, can't wait you to be mine."

Yunho took his hand off of your neck, and held your legs while he was pumping in you lastly. He bit his tongue forcefully, you were surely the best fuck he'd ever had. He didn't want to stop, despite the pleasure becoming too intense to be handled. Tears were falling across your face, feeling your pussy getting worshipped by his dick, too fucked out to even answer him:

"Want me to fill you with my seed, princess?"

You nodded slightly, biting your lower lip and rubbing away your ruined mascara from your eyes.

He pulled out and in, one time, rougher than ever.

"I want you to use your words when i speak."

You whined in reply: "Shit- yes boss, im begging you."

A few more thrust and he felt his orgasm hitting his body, releasing a big load, ropes of hot cum taking their way inside you, mixed with your own arousal. You both groaned at the addictive feeling. His cock was swirling once he finally slid out of you. Yunho headed towards the bathroom and brought you a towel, he caressed you inner thighs while cleaning you from the mess he made. He kissed your body repeatedly, getting closer to your face. He stopped at the sight of your surprised expression:

"Aftercare?" you asked.

"What? I might be a rough dom but im still a gentleman."

Yunho joined you on the bed, and wrapped his arms around your body in a warm hug. He moved your hair from your face leaving a small kiss on your forehead.

"Gotta make sure you'll never leave me."

[milksnake-tea]

For the event, Nanook with Augst 8 but instead reader is the one got hurt

❀ ˎˊ- prompts: They come home beaten, bloody, and bruised. ❀ ˎˊ- 1k followers event ❀ ˎˊ- character: nanook ❀ ˎˊ- warnings: implications of physical violence, mentions of bruises and blood, nanook is scary ❀ ˎˊ- a/n: im scared of nanook but also incredibly attracted to them ALSO WHAT IS IT WITH YALL AND ASKING TO GET BEAT UP /LHJ but ykw i know u asked for angst but i kinda made it fluffy imsorry. not really satisified w how this ended but i think its okay

Honestly, whoever did this to you was an idiot.

It was one thing to antagonize the lover of the Destruction. It was another to physically hurt them.

So either your assaulter had a death wish, or a severe deficit in braincells. Although, you weren't too keen on the idea of just running to your lover - knowing them, Nanook would break all of hell loose, giving them a fate worse than death itself.

You sighed to yourself as you rubbed at your cheek, which had already begun to bruise. Thankfully, you weren't hurt too bad, so you could probably just brush it off with a few bandages and ointment. All you had to do was to hope that Nanook wasn't home today.

But of course, fate wasn't on your side.

The second you opened the door to your shared room with the Aeon, what greeted you was a sight of Nanook in their mortal form, lounging on the bed. They weren't doing anything in particular, simply staring up off into space as golden specks flickered around them like fireflies.

Their eyes flicked to you the moment you walked through the doorway. Slowly, their gaze roamed your body, zeroing in on your injuries - evidence of a fight.

Their expression barely changed, save for the slightest narrowing of their eyes. But the atmosphere immediately dampened, as though a black hole had came and sucked all of the air out of the room. The pressure dropped so quickly that your ears popped, and you winced.

Noticing your discomfort, Nanook immediately snapped out of their momentary rage, and the air went back to normal - only slightly, though.

Wordlessly, they beckoned you towards them with a finger, their right arm open for you. Cautiously, you sat down on the bed, allowing Nanook to wrap their arm around you and pull you close.

They studied your bruise carefully, running their finger across it. Swiping their thumb against it, a bit of their power seeped into you, instantly mending your wound.

"Healed by the Destruction," you couldn't help but muse, leaning your head against their broad shoulder. "How ironic. Aren't all Aeons bound their Paths?"

Nanook only hummed, a deep rumbling in their chest. "I've strayed from my Path twice before. The first was when I fell for you. The second is now. Clearly, the laws of the universe are not as rigid as you make them out to be."

"I guess," you shrugged, closing your eyes. Nanook doesn't breathe, nor do they have a heartbeat, but they are warm. Warmer than a human, more like a flame, if anything. "You're not going to ask who did it?"

"I already know," they merely replied. You couldn't help but feel as though their gaze was quite literally burning into your skin as they stared down at you. "I will take care of them, do not worry."

"Don't overdo it," you sighed, shifting into a comfortable position. "The last time you went after someone who hurt me, you destroyed an entire planet."

"I was killing two birds with one stone," they explained matter-of-factly. You laughed, squinting your eyes at them.

"Mmm, I suppose you were," you admitted. Nanook only smiled briefly before poking your nose.

"You should get go wash up," they advised. "You're filthy."

"Gee, thanks," you scoffed, but stood up regardless. You stretched for a bit, rolling out your shoulders before kissing Nanook on the cheek, and then you were off to the bathroom.

But as you closed shower door, and the Aeon heard water running, Nanook's gaze darkened. They dissipated into golden sparks, the only thing that hinted at their existence being a divot in the bed where they had once laid.

That night, as you peacefully rested, unaware of what was happening, your attacker awoke to flames - dark, dark flames devouring their home world as the Destruction watched from afar, the burning planet resting in their dark hand.

reblogs w comments are appreciated !!

[kenobifitz]

Favorite ever L&O SVU fic of yours and if someone else's? Let's start a chain. Tag someone else!

hello anon and thanks for the ask🧚‍♀️

there are so many amazing writers in the SVU fandom, i mainly read barisi/rollisi fics so these are some of my recs for those if you're into them :)

two of mine (which im surprisingly proud of not gonna lie)

absolution (if you want some barisi smut with religious guilt and virgin!sonny in the mix)

He could lie. Say it’s just him wanting to impress Rafael for their first time together. But no. It was his first time. Ever. Sonny Carisi was a virgin.

is it casual? (if you want an barisi au where sonny is a hot gym teacher and lots of pining)

Rafael gets dragged into a spin class and meets a ridiculously hot gym instructor in tight spandex shorts.

nooow, onto the recs, gonna try to put a few and im probably forgetting a lot of them because of the amount of crazy good fics in the fandom.

barisi fics:

Established Dom!Barba & Sub!Carisi by the amazing spectacular @request-remand

really good barisi smut with the feels, honestly just read all of their fics they're all amazing

you didn’t have to look at me like that, like i mean something by lousdrafts ( @fwtxl )

Rafael barba is a pining idiot who doesn’t think sonny would want him, but surprise he does!

Or 5 + 1 times they almost do something about the ever building tension and when they finally do

love love this one, lots of pining 🫶🏼

The Cabin by @margoblack

During a snowstorm, Carisi and Barba crash their car and are seemingly rescued by a pair of strangers. However, as they recover in a remote cabin, they begin to suspect that their rescuers might not be as helpful as they seem.

Margo has so many good fics if you like romantic comedy (funniest writer fr) and angst

Every Homily A Love Letter by @barisistill

Sonny is a priest AU.

This one just...god it's so beautifully heartbreaking. *praying for an update pls* but yeah I'm a sucker for religious guilt and this one hits all the right buttons.

So. The cat. by @ae-nar

“Hi there, sweetheart,” he says and watches as the cat’s ears twitch. He brings his right hand up slowly and puts it in front of the cat for it to sniff. It barely opens its eyes, which makes Sonny worry for its survivor instinct, aren’t cats supposed to be on constant lookout? He’s always been more of a dog person, if he’s honest, so he really doesn’t know what he’s doing. The cat, seemingly satisfied with Sonny’s scent, lays its head down. Is it going back to sleep? What is Sonny even supposed to do?! He doesn’t remember emergency protocol for finding a cat in Barba’s open office at ass o’clock! “Who are you?”

Alternative Universe where Barba can transform into a cat and it's so fucking adorable I loved it!! (Also read their Barmaro to Barisi pipeline series, really good character study)

Serve and Protect by GenuineSnoof

Liv and Rafael don't see eye to eye about their latest case. Rafael feels forced to take matters into his own hands.

honestly, badass Rafael all around!! with worried sonny, hurt rafa, established barisi like come ooon, i love it.

Late Night Phone Calls by OreoLuvr13

Rafael thought that he was done with getting Liv's late night phone calls when he left the DA's office. It turns out he was wrong. Liv is calling and Sonny isn't home. A Barisi missing scene from 19.19-Sunk Cost Fallacy

im a sucker for post 19.19 fics, so this one hits right.

rollisi fics:

The Things We Can't Forget by @electrictoes

When Carisi's sister shows up at the precinct, the case she presents the squad with brings old demons back to haunt him.

i would put all their fics here but i cant so this one has to do, just delicious hurt/comfort, but really go read all theirs, good rollisi always

Admiring the View by Niklet

"She used to roll her eyes when she heard other women talking about how they’d fallen in love with their best friend. And then it had happened to her. Although now she thought about it, she wasn’t sure which one of “best friend” or “falling in love” had come first."

can u tell i love sonny too? yeah

Obvious by SwordsandPens

A stranger to them, who had not witnessed the years of partnership and friendship and near misses….could see that Carisi had feelings for her. Of course, Amanda wasn’t naive. She knew that no matter how professional Sonny was, there was a way about him; a subconscious perk in his body when she entered a room, and he was always close by; an arm's reach from her, most of any time they were together. But they’d always been like that, hadn’t they?

like they were obviously in love for a whileeee

you got plans? don't say that by bcofl0ve

they make out in the courthouse hallway and carisi comes in his pants and then they fuck in the bathroom that's it that's the plot

good ol' rollisi smut

anyways that's all i have for now, there are a lot im probably forgetting and anyone tagged here please feel free to share your recs if u want🫶🏼🫡

[my-jukebox]

hihi! i have a obey me request that i thought of after reading the hug headcanons w the brothers post you made!! (it was REALLY nice btw <3 i loved it!)

what about mc coming home after a tiring day at RAD and mammon just hugs them n they just have a cute fluffy moment …or!! mammon coming home after a tiring day at RAD, and mc just hugs him n again they have a cute fluffy moment, any of the two are fine since they’re both so cute!! im gonna leave the choice up to ya, cant wait too see what u write <3

- 🃏 anon! :3

I'm so glad you loved the previous post. I brainstormed my best here and tried to make it longer so forgive me if it's not up to the mark. Also God it took so long, I'm sorry.

Genre: Oneshot, Fluff

Characters: (gn! reader), and Mammon.

"Mammon, towards the light!"

The photographer said as Mammon turned towards the light, maintaining his pose. He had been going for hours together with only a ten minute break every hour.

"Majolish is gonna love these pics. Great job today!" was all Mammon heard before he rushed to his studio room and removed his makeup. He looked so tired, to the point where he should've considered getting Asmo to keep the people at bay.

He took deep breaths and finally got some shut eye until—

"Mammon, the next shot is ready!"

"Ahh shit, here we go again!"

Mammon headed out the room and watched as the studio began filling up with multiple models who he was supposed to pose with.

'This is gonna be draining!' He thought as he was being dressed and practically, dragged by his photographer on the stage.

—

The lecture seemed never ending. The professor kept talking about Latin phrases for spells and potions but all you could think about was sleep.

"(Y/N)?" The teacher called out.

"(Y/N)!?" She repeated.

"Yeah!!"

"Are you zoning out? Please pay attention or else you'll fail the midterms."

"Yes, ma'am"

The teacher nodded her head at you and went back to teaching some spells again. You couldn't be bothered. You'd just have to pull up another study session with the brothers again, it seems.

The minute the bell rang, you got up from the bench, refusing to greet anybody as you made your way to the House of Lamentation.

Upon reaching back home, you entered your room to find Mammon asleep on your bed. You gently shook him.

"Mammon, are you alright? It's pretty rare to find you here of all places." You said, voice laced with concern.

"I'm alright. I'm just so tired. When I tell ya' I was like a prisoner there, I'm not kiddin'!!" He said as he looked up at you. He had absolutely no energy left in him.

"There?" You asked, unsure of what he was talking about.

"The modelling studio. Those stupid, little ahhhh.....they weren't letting me rest." He said, clearly annoyed with how his entire day went. You chuckled at his little rage towards his workers before throwing your bag on the floor and removing your shoes, making your way towards the bed.

"Aww baby don't worry. You wanna....cuddle?" You asked him as you watched his cheeks get flushed with different shades of red.

You laughed and opened your arms wide for him. He scowled but still laid down on your chest as you massage his head gently. This moment was all you needed. Especially after a day like this.

"How was your day?" He said softly, so as to not disturb the peaceful moment.

"Eh. You weren't there in class so it wasn't the best." He grinned widely at you response.

"Of course it wasn't the best. The Great Mammon promises to never leave you alone again."

"I'll hold you on that promise."

You hear a low rumble from Mammon, indicating that he was chuckling. You hug him even tighter, never wanting to let go. As you both cuddled, you found yourself finally content and at peace after such an awful day.

And so, you both stayed up the entire night; talking, laughing, joking about everything and nothing at the same time. The night began to fade slowly as you both found yourselves with each other once again, cherishing the eventful moments of closeness as the world outside was asleep.

I finally did it. i got a conclusion at last!

~Masterlist~

Do like, comment and/or reblog if you enjoyed!

[somerabbitholes]

i'd log in but i fully forgot my username and password since i left for college lol, but the first semester of college ended and i'm finally back home for my break. i'm doing a degree in history in a liberal arts university which has been my absolute dream since i was a child; everyone else in my class was an engineer/doctor aspirant and i was the labelled Humanities Child. so college was supposed to be The Dream for me and, in many ways, i have. HOWEVER, the issue is that i am now surrounded by The Humanities Child(ren) of every school, and now i have no personality? i also feel hopelessly out of place because im surrounded by people who seem to know sooo much more than me (i know this sounds like a very much grass is greener on the other side situation but i assure you i am hopelessly out of my depth here). i'm genuinely having a little bit of a crisis bc i used to be the child that Knew Things and Read, but now, so is everybody im surrounded by. i originally meant to send this ask to ask you for recs/resources on knowing more, but i'm not fully sure as to what exactly i need to know more of, so do you have any tips on how to inculcate a habit of learning more generally (subscribe to newspapers? listen to podcasts? but like, when, where, which ones, how do i find the right ones?). i desperately need to be the smart kid again, i don't know who i am without it lol

hello. i think you should be patient with yourself. college is disorienting because you go from being with people who didn't really choose to be in school and study what school makes them study to people who definitely chose the sciences or humanities or whatever. it's only logical that you feel out of depth, i know i did too. but trust me, however much it feels like people know more already, it's also that college is a leveller: you will be taught things, you will be taught how to think and much of what's coming in terms of academia is a fresh start for everyone.

i don't think the way out is to know everything and to always be up to date on everything under the sun. i also can't recommend what you should be reading or listening to, other than just standard news, which will then lead you to more finer material that's about the things you care about. the easiest way really is to be on the lookout for sources: your professors will tell you, ask your classmates if something they mention sounds interesting, find what you like in the library and so on.

also lastly, i don't think you're supposed to know who you are when you're in college. college exists for you to figure that out. don't worry about not knowing what your thing is (i'm 24 and i don't know what my thing is), but start small with things that are adjacent to either what you're studying or what you've conventionally liked. then you build on that and the next and so on.

hope this helps :)

[cerberus-new-owner]

WHOOOOOO week late birthday present to me from me

thank you me

your very welcome me

did i speed write like over half of this like 4 minutes ago (as im editing this and adding the intro on tumblr) yes, yes i did

But anywaysssss onto the cw

CW: like none (i hope), gn mc, mc and the characters relationships can be taken as platonic or romantic, fluffffff

Lucifer

the same pen every year but, its not just him stealing it from mc's room to rewarp it he has a box full of the exact same pens if one of them has a slight defect he will write a letter to the company that made the pens and send the damaged pen with it (mc shouldn't mention the fact that they've gotten the exact same pen from him four years in a row his pride will be hurt and he will just start engraving their name into the pens never know he may eventually switch it up and put a cute little nickname or something on the pen instead of just 'mc'), either that or he listens very closely and pays attention to what mc might need throught the year need a new desk at some point cause satan broke theirs placing a book down consider it bought mc dropped their bag in a puddle and need a new laptop it's theirs. sadly though he will only get them things that are practical hat they say they need so no jewlery or devices you already have that work fine unless mc can come up with a good excuse as to why the latest tech is needed for studying, there is the odd chance he may get them a bottle of demonus thinking 'they seem to like the taste of it even if it doesn't affect them' (doesn't matter what he gets mc the pens will always be given to them as a fun little bonus prize)

Mammon

anything and everything mc has even looked at for more than half a second is now in their room they mentioned a certain idk (whats something a half sane sheep that has to babysit like 9 demons 2 angels and a sorcerer on daily basis look at in a store oh well) mc mentions something they saw the other day that caught their eye his broke ass is looking for the cheapest deal he can find (or most expensive depends on if he has goldie or not) and buying it

Satan

like lucifer mans will think practical things and like himself he thinks books are the most practical things of all of course cats are fairly high on his list of practical things (they are a must have unless you're allergic to them if you're allergic to them im sorry cats cause you pain, then again they cause most people pain tiny little fluffy a holes that i love continuing) he will be bothering mc about their choice in books asking alot of questions along the lines of 'what genre are you most into' 'mc whos your favourite author' 'fiction or non-fiction' all in attempt to figure out what mc likes if mc isn't really into books and is into idk sports or gardening something like that he will search endlessly to find an interesting book to give mc on one of their hobbies and if they don't like the book he can always "borrow" them to learn more about mc's likes and hobbies

Asmodeus

feel like this is a no brainer but some kind of spa day or outfit (wait new headcannon alert what if he knows how to sew and occasionally makes clothes for himself for y'know when theres nothing new in fashion or theres an important event he cant find anything fabulous to wear but occasionally being the keyword he probably uses most of his talent fixing rips in satan shirts from satans outbursts) anyways... he will spend an entire day fawning over mc he will make sure they dont lift a finger god forbid they get a papercut from wrapping paper or worry lines from stressing about how tf they're supposed to sleep when mammons filled their room with gifts

Feel like because of this i should do how they wrap the gifts so this goes for Christmas / any other holidays too so bonusss (this is also who would remember to include a card)

lucifer

plain colour probably in mcs favourite colour no ribbon or anything fancy just plain [insert favourite colour] wrapping paper, he takes pride in wrapping his gifts neatly (he's wrapped the same pen for several years straight he has had practice) he gets a card for mc like the presents wrapping the outside is a plain colour with words relating to whatever celebration it is with either the dryest shit ever written on the inside or the most sappy shit depends on his relationship with mc if its the latter option though we will only give mc the card in private knowing exactly how his brothers would react

mammon

he uses the christmas wrapping paper from two years ago that everyone forgot they had until he called out 'anyone gonna use this wrapping paper i found in the closet' to satan replying 'you know thats christmas wrapping paper right' and mammon taking satan answer as a go ahead to use it, he'd do his best to wrap any gifts he got mc he looks up a tutorial and everything and 100% is proud of his work not matter how messy it looks, if anyone chooses to mention how messily it's wrapped he will say its part of the suspense he will use ribbons and bows to add extra effect

he forgets about aa card entirely

leviathan

ruri-chan wrapping paper wrapped as neatly as possible so the little images line up on every side as perfectly as possible he will spend hours trying to get the folds just right so the images line up nothing fancy like ribbons or bows he'd feel bad if he covered one of the characters so he doesn't bother with it

he panicked about what to write in the card so he gave up deciding that having a marathon with mc was way more important than writing his feelings onto a card

satan

cat wrapping paper or wrapping paper that looks like pages from books he makes any gifts he's wrapped look pretty (just like the pretty boy he is whosaidthat/j) he wraps the gift neatly and puts a little bow on it before writing a heartfelt card and using a little bit of tape to attach it to the wrapped box

asmodeus

picks out the prettiest wrapping paper he can find even if he's just wrapping a card that says "Spa Day!" he is wrapping it neatly with utmost care

he chooses a card based on mc's likes and hobbies of course making sure it's bedazzled and as pretty as possible

beelzebub

two layers of wrapping paper he found one that had images of food on it but halfway through wrapping mc's gift with it he took a bite out of the wrapping paper so he changed wrapping paper to a plain one so he would be somewhat less tempted to eat it

he gets mc a card and starts to write something in it before the writing stops mid word and theres a bunch of crumbs from him eating something forgetting to finish the card and giving it to mc anyways

belphegor

clouds it's very nicely wrapped because he probably went to one of those 'we wrap the presents for you' places and paid them the only part he did himself was the card and he put a tiny bit of effort into it until the writing gets smudged and messy and is that a bit of drool he fell asleep midway through writing oh well guess he better nap with mc to make up for falling asleep

omg what will i do nowwww guess what

boom

double bonus cause i said so

Barbatosss

tea party, tea party, tea party (i like tea) he will invite mc to the castle not only does this mean he gets to celebrate diavolo also gets to celebrate mc's birthday (like diavolo wasn't the one to suggest it, barbatos just anticipated dia asking to invite them over) barbatos will cook mc food from the human realm majority of it being things he heard them say they liked or missed from the human realm occasionally he might throw in a devidom ingredient or two to enhance somethings flavour or to add a fun little surprise (maybe he throws in something to change the colour of their fur for a few minutes who knows) as for the acctual gift part he probably gets mc something small to remind them of him or something practical he's not lucifer when it comes to gifts and may look into the future to see if theres anything mc will need in the near future like maybe their bag is gonna break in the next two weeks and they'll need a new one just so happen barbs gave them a new bag for their birhday the week before perfect

he wraps gifts by himself with a plain wrapping paper of mcs favourite colour and by far out of everyone wraps them the nicest he's lived for a millennia he's had practice wrapping gifts when it comes to writing a card for them he does his best to make it heartfelt and meaningful

soooooo tadaaa i've finished unless people want the others (by people i mean if i were in theory to gain motivation to write for the rest of the characters)

i hope people enjoyed this have a good day, night, brunch, apple, pen (pineapple apple pen)

follow the leader, the leader, the leader, follow the leader right to the masterlist

dangnabit his means im old now too

[thisgirlnamedblusy]

Hi!!!!! Once again THANK YOU sm for the FOOD like i've reread all ur fics again while waiting for my hair to set hehe it's just. a really great way to pass time and think abt the fluff and the sin <3

AND ummmmmm not to also jump in the bandwagon but. im feeling... 😳😳😳 rn and would like to request for a 5'1 catgirl!reader with gp!Marilyn OR Laurel if that's okay 👉🏻👈🏻

Basically Reader doesn't realize she's going into heat (IT'S HER FIRST TIME & SHE DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS EVEN A POSSIBILITY BUT OHHHH BOY) but Mari/Lau notices and teases her throughout the week with indulging her being more affectionate but then the heat smashes into reader like a freight train and she's left a mewling mess for her Mommy!!!!

like help she's full on NEEDY for Mari/Lau but she's MEAN and teases Reader further and Reader goes "if you don't want me, I guess I'll just to go out and see who wants me! >:(" to trigger Mari/Lau's possessiveness & Mari/Lau rising to the bait BC READER IS HER KITTY & NO ONE ELSE'S LIKE. hhhhh hhHhHhhHh NUH UH, YOU'RE MINE 🔪

AND HELP also Mari/Lau going "Aw, does my dumb little kitty cat need Mommy to breed and fill her up her own kittens? Is that what you want?" while Reader just a drooling mess underneath her IS CURRENTLY LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE AND IM JUST. CLENCHING MY FISTS SO HARD. like PLEASE,,,,,,,,, bestie,,,,,, if ur ok with this req and write it I will literally owe u my life thank u sm 🫂

PS: feel free to go ham with the breeding & dumbification kink bc im literally biting down on one of my stuffed toys rn just thinking abt it and WAHHHH once again, thank you 😳💕

Yesss!!!! Here it is!!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!! It was so funny to write it!! Thank you for your request!!!! <3 <3

Poor Kitty

Pairing: Marilyn Thornhill x Fem, Student, Cat girl! Reader

Warnings: Smut, Intersex Marilyn (She has a dick) several kinks, heat, teasing, blowjob…

Word count: 5,181

Summary: You were a cat girl, and you have many needs, maybe your lover can fulfill your desperate desires…

N/A: Requests are open!!! Sorry about the delays, I’m working hard on your requests. I love you all!!!

“Shit, it's hot,” you whispered.

You were in the library, doing what you had to do, homework, study...

But you were finding it much more complicated than usual. It was supposed to be winter, it was supposed to be cold, but you were sweating while chills of unknown origin ran through your body. It was hard for you to focus, there was too much noise in your head, a noise that didn't come from outside, there was no one in the library, and those strange sounds could only come from inside you, purrs that you were afraid someone besides you would hear.

Purring was something common in you. You were a cat woman, something like a werewolf, but without problems with the full moon and increased aggression. You were simply, according to what your companions said: Just a kitty.

You knew you could be fearsome if you thought about it, that if you transformed you could rival even the fiercest werewolf. You weren't interested. Your only worries were your studies. You were always a very good student and you made your parents proud. You just had to be careful about maybe a ball rolling on the ground or some small animal in the forest did not attract your attention so much as to distract you.

The book in front of you turned into a jumbled, blurry array of letters. You were unable to read it. Nervously, you ran your hand over your trembling leg, and the sensation produced an unexpected reaction.

“Meow,” you meowed unintentionally, putting your hand over your mouth and looking around embarrassedly. There was nobody there, much to your relief.

Normally you were quite capable of controlling those small impulses. You were proud that you weren't a howling, restless mess like your fellow werewolves. That day you felt strange. Simply with your hand touching your body all your senses went crazy. You were always quite sensitive, but never so sensitive as to lose control.

Some footsteps coming from the stairs took you out of your thoughts and the strange nervousness you had was accentuated even more.

Luckily for you, it wasn't one of your classmates from Nevermore, it was one of your teachers, your favorite teacher, Marilyn Thornhill.

The redhead came down the stairs with her usual smile and immediately noticed your presence. You stared back at her, feeling your heart beating faster and the disconcerting heat inside you growing.

The woman tilted her head as she walked over to a secluded bookcase, motioning for you to follow her. You didn't even have time to think about your next move. Dragging the chair with a nasty creaking, you got up and went with her.

You turned the corner and there she was, pretending to look at some old books. You approached cautiously, looking around you. As if on automatic impulse, you wrapped your arms around her waist and rested your head on her back.

The heat you had increased, but at that moment all you thought about was her. Marilyn laughed softly and turned around, taking your hand.

“Hello, honey…” She whispered in your ear. After glancing to either side of her briefly, she leaned her head towards you and placed her lips on yours. A desperate moan came out of your mouth. It wasn't a meow, it was a sound you couldn't remember ever making.

When you arrived at Nevermore, the last thing on your mind was having an affair with one of your teachers. For you, those kinds of relationships were fiction, things that only happened on a tv screen. After whole afternoons in the conservatory and funny talks, that nice teacher-student relationship crossed the line it wasn't supposed to cross.

It was a forbidden, clandestine relationship, based on kisses, hugs and whispered words of love. You were madly in love with Marilyn and she knew it and enjoyed seeing your eyes begging for a kiss, for a caress.

The kiss was not meant to be what it became. Agitated and terribly nervous, you deepened the kiss, causing the redhead to widen her eyes in surprise as your tongue entered her mouth moving mercilessly.

You didn't know why you were doing it. It was just like your instincts were guiding your actions. You were a shy girl and you never asked for more than Marilyn seemed to want to give you, but with each passionate kiss, with each brush of your body against hers, that strange state you were in seemed to subside.

“Honey, honey…” Marilyn said when her back collided with a self. You didn't listen to her, you kept kissing her, caressing her, while your purring became more and more evident. “Honey, what's wrong with you?”

Her hand went to your chest to stop you before you started another round of merciless kissing. Involuntarily, you snorted at the loss contact, causing her gaze to turn curious. With severe difficulty, you managed to relax and shook your head, embarrassed by your enthusiasm. You were not yourself, all the kisses you gave her gave you a strange pleasure and you almost lost control.

“I…I…I'm sorry,” you said, with your cheeks red and your breathing fast and disordered. Marilyn smiled, shaking her head slightly.

“(Y/N), you know we have to be careful…” She told you, caressing your cheek.

Every time her skin brushed against yours, millions of electrical impulses made your pupils dilate and you had to fight the urge to jump at her neck again.

“I know, it's just that…” You said, keeping your composure, putting distance between her and you to avoid the temptation.

“Are you okay? You're sweating,” she told you, looking at you now with some concern.

You shook your head and sighed. Your heart was pounding, your purrs were loud, and the heat you felt was becoming unbearable.

“No… I don't know what's wrong with me. I was calmly studying and suddenly I started to sweat...”

“Do you want to go to the infirmary, honey?” She asked affectionately, putting her hand to your forehead. Her breathing was also fast, you were able to realize that.

“Meow,” you meowed again, covering your mouth immediately after. The brush of her hand against your skin made you lose control. She pulled away and frowned at you, carefully studying your condition. “I'm sorry…”

Marilyn was looking at you curiously. Her eyes changed in an instant, turning slightly dark.

“I think I know what's wrong with you…” She whispered, getting a little closer to you. Her hands went to your waist and her lips kissed yours again.

There were too many sensations to be able to control. You pressed against her as you deepened the kiss, you wanted to feel all of her body, all of her warmth. Little by little the chills increased and an overwhelming heat began to form between your legs. Marilyn pushed you away again, but this time with a petulant gesture.

“What's happening to me? It's a feeling I've never felt before...” You said, ashamed of your erratic and passionate behavior. The redhead smiled mischievously.

“It's pretty obvious,” she said, crossing her arms.

“Obvious?” You asked, starting to get very nervous. Marilyn agreed.

“Of course, just look at you...” She said, amused, pointing at you.

You looked at yourself. You were a sweaty mess purring desperately. You didn't quite understand what she was referring to, and worst of all, you couldn't take your eyes off her dress, where a rather obvious bulge had formed.

“I still... I still don't understand anything...” You said nervously, closing your eyes.

“My love, you are in heat. I've had enough cats to know that.”

You opened your eyes and you were speechless.

Your parents had told you that it could happen, but the years went by and you never had that feeling, so you had completely forgotten about it.

Even as a human girl, your feline counterpart often took over your feelings without the need for you to transform. Apparently, heat was one of those feelings.

“Oh…” You said with flushed cheeks. “I don't know what to say…”

Marilyn approached again, curiously watching the reactions your body had with her caresses. It seemed that the way your hair stood on end and your body trembled desperately was amusing her.

“You don't have to say anything, honey, it's normal, you don't have to be ashamed,” she said to you with a loving voice, a tone of voice that even under normal circumstances made you tremble.

“I feel like I'm going to explode… What can I do to stop feeling like that?” You asked, instantly regretting it. You weren't an idiot, you knew the answer.

“Do I really have to answer?” She said, laughing, with a tender look.

You shook your head and, checking that the library was still empty, you rushed to her lips again, this time with more desperation. You didn't know if it was the right time, but you needed it, you needed something that you hadn't considered in the last few weeks, you needed her.

Marilyn kissed you back, trying to keep you as still as possible. You, with a too indiscreet meow, kissed her neck. The redhead was panting, but she barely moved, letting you do everything you wanted, almost everything. Your hand moved down between her legs, where her arousal throbbed, wanting to come out. Immediately her hand stopped yours, grabbing your wrist.

“What are you doing?” She asked with a sigh. Her breathing was also disordered, and she didn't seem to want to lose control. You barely heard her voice, your head imagined what it would be like to feel her inside you, how pleasant it would be for her to take you, to fill you up...

“I… Well… I…” You stammered. She laughed again, shaking her head.

“Honey, I'm very flattered but…” She said, looking at you determinedly. “I, I don't think it's the best time, nor the best place.”

You meowed again, going crazy to try to silence your own instincts.

“I thought…” You whispered, trying to calm yourself down with all your might.

“You have to be patient, honey,” she told you, pulling you into a warm hug. It would be a loving, romantic gesture, if you didn't feel her arousal digging into your body. Marilyn seemed to notice and she backed away in embarrassment. “Sorry, (Y/N), my body sometimes seems to think for itself. Come, I'll make you an infusion so you can relax, okay?”

You nodded, feeling enormous frustration. Your need didn’t change after that infusion. It would be a terrible week for you.

There was nothing that could ease that tension. Your encounters with Marilyn were still just as pure. Sometimes you thought she was amused by seeing you desperate, seeing how you begged for her to take you. At first you thought it was your imagination, but her kisses and her caresses, her most common gestures of affection were much more intense and she smiled, she always smiled.

You no longer felt ashamed, your need was so great that you asked her directly. Marilyn just laughed, shaking her head, saying that the time would come soon, that you would have to hold on a little longer. Your despair increased every day and your meows and purrs began to affect your academic life, interrupting classes and unleashing teasing from your classmates.

A week had passed and the cold showers and the walks and hunting moments in the woods were no longer useful for anything. You knew what you wanted and the only woman who could give it to you seemed to mock you. You loved Marilyn n and she loved you, you didn't understand why to make you wait amused her, why she enjoyed seeing how your body begged, a docile body, that would let her do what she wanted, you would be a rag doll for her.

“And put that one in that corner,” the redhead told you, while you placed some pots where she was indicating. You always obeyed, hoping that this sudden extreme submission would make her please, make her please you.

“It's already done...” You whispered, controlling your trembling. You couldn't help it, every time you looked at her you had those visions, those uncontrolled desires. It didn't matter how many times you masturbated, that wasn't enough, your body wanted her.

“Great,” Marilyn said, clasping her hands together, satisfied.

You agreed. Your body trembled and sweated, your pupils were dilated. You could barely speak normally, every three words, you would meow. You had to do something.

“Marilyn…” You said in a low voice, without looking at the redhead.

“Mm?” She murmured, cutting a few small leaves from a plant.

“I...I, I can't bear it anymore...” You said, slowly approaching her desk.

“What's wrong, honey? Have I made you work too much?” She asked, completely ignoring the true meaning of your words.

“That's not what I mean…” You whispered, suppressing another meow. “I'm having such a hard time...”

She looked at you and made a fake sad face.

“Oh, my love, come here,” she told you, extending her hand for you to take.

You obeyed her, feeling a rush of warmth as her hand gently gripped yours. Your heartbeat quickened again and your breathing was rapid, sonorous. The purring was not long in coming.

“Sit down,” She ask you, pointing to her lap. You carried out her order immediately. That was even worse, you'd rather she told you not to go back to the conservatory, to break up with you, than to be sitting on her lap, so close to her, your most desperate desire.

“My poor kitty…” She whispered into your ear, grabbing your hips to place you with your legs on either side of hers. “You’re having a hard time”

You nodded, letting yourself go. Little by little, your hips began to sway, rubbing against her body. She did nothing, she just laughed tenderly, seeing how you melted with that little contact. As if evil had taken over her, she emitted a subtle and very erotic moan in your ear, while the touch intensified. Her body was responding quickly and soon you felt her arousal rubbing against your needy center.

That sensation was completely new and dangerously exciting. You moved automatically, seeking as much contact as possible. Marilyn kissed you, caressed you, while she gently followed the rhythm of your hips.

You could feel it, you were so close that you lost control completely, moving desperately and not being able to suppress a considerable amount of meowing.

“Please... Meow... I... Meow... I need... Ple... Meow... Please,” you said almost crying. She looked at you surprised and ran her hand up your legs, under your uniform skirt. Your wetness was overwhelming and she seemed to find that so funny.

“Shhh… Calm down, (Y/N), does this relieve you?” She whispered to you, passing her hand through your folds, over your underwear.

You moaned strangely. No one had ever touched you there. It looked like what you wanted, but it wasn't enough, you knew it, and so did she. You didn't want her to stop. Among more desperate meows, you agreed, while her caresses became slower and slower.

“Very good, honey…” The redhead whispered. “You're a good kitty...”

Saying those words, she pulled her hand away and with a gentle push, she pushed you off of her. You groaned in frustration and tears began to run down your cheeks.

“What?” You asked, your purrs completely drowning out your words. “Why? I, I liked it…” You said desperate, trying to return to her lap. She got up, pointing to the clock on the wall.

“It's time for dinner, (Y/N), I don't want you to be late,” she said as if nothing happened, with that tone and that mocking smile that became too frequent that week.

“Meow…” You meowed, before clearing your throat to be able to speak clearly. “Why are you doing this to me?”

She looked at you surprised.

“Doing what, my love?” She asked with an innocent voice.

“You know it perfectly…Meow,” you stammered. “You do nothing but make fun of me. I just want you to love me, to want me... you know what I'm going through and you know what I need.”

“(Y/N), haven't I relieved you a bit?” She asked mockingly.

You snorted, incredulous and stopped to think. You needed it badly, you needed it desperately like you'd never felt before, and your body was going crazy.

“I'm sick of your games,” you said, hissing, suppressing the trembling of your body. “You know what I tell you? If you don't want me, I'll find someone who does,” you said without looking at her, going to the conservatory door.

Marilyn didn't say anything, but her expression told you that those words made something move inside her.

“What did you just say?” She asked in a dangerous tone, stopping you from leaving  with a strong grip on your wrist.

“You heard me. I'm tired of waiting... I'll look for someone who doesn't laugh at me and gives me what I need,” you said defiantly. Marilyn pulled you hard in front of her. Her look was not that of the tender and sweet botany teacher, her eyes were cold, threatening.

“How dare you talk to me like that, you filthy kitty?” She hissed, grabbing your hair and yanking it hard. “I don't care how desperate you are, you're still mine, you hear me?”

You widened your eyes. That possessive attitude surprised you for a moment, but soon you began to enjoy what you had achieved. It was the button you had to push to get on her nerves, to make her realize you needed her. You meowed with pleasure and your purring was once again present in the conservatory.

“I need you…” You said, faking more pleading than you really wanted to show. Marilyn released you and crossed her arms, shaking her head and softening her expression.

“You need me... Oh, poor silly kitten... You're so desperate...” She said caressing your cheek. “Do you need me so much how to make me angry?”

“Yes…” You sighed, letting yourself melt from her warm touch on your skin. “Please… I want…”

She laughed and returned her mocking and amused expression.

“What do you want, honey? Do you want mommy to take care of you?” She asked ironically.

At that moment, you put your defiant and rebellious attitude aside and nodded profusely without thinking. All your clothes were in the way and your eyes went to her crotch, which was marked in her blue jumpsuit, which seemed to call you by name.

“I want you to…” You said stammering. “I want to be yours, Marilyn… I, I need it. I need you inside of me… Please.”

The redhead laughed with satisfaction, passing one hand over your chest while she with the other she got rid of her underwear.

“How cute you are, (Y/N), you're such a desperate kitty…” She whispered while you only dedicated yourself to feeling her caresses. “Mommy likes to play with the kittens like you… She wants them to pray for her…”

You just nodded automatically, noticing how you had fewer and fewer clothes. You didn't feel capable of saying anything, only of purring, of panting, of feeling how the moment you wanted so much was getting closer little by little. The redhead stepped away a bit and undid the buttons on her blue jumpsuit, letting it fall to the floor and finally freeing her length which looked almost as desperate as you. You drool at the sight before you.

Marilyn ran her hand along the length of her cock, stroking it gently, making her quiver with eagerness. She was enjoying her own caresses, but she obviously had other things on her mind.

“Get on your knees,” she ordered, pointing to the ground. You were surprised, noticing how the despair you felt seemed to have no end. She wasn't going to make it easy for you and you knew that, but seeing her excitement, the desperation with which her cock throbbed in front of you, made your body move by itself, resting your knees on the cold stone floor.

“Mommy… Please….Meow,” you said, meowing again involuntarily. Marilyn laughed at the speed with which you picked up on her game, and she gently cupped your chin.

“I know you're anxious for mommy to give you kittens, to feel how she fills you up, but you've been bad, honey, and now you'll have to please me. Use your sweet mouth, you silly girl... Show me that you need me...”

You nodded and timidly obeyed, running your tongue along her entire length. She moaned as she felt your lips around her and gently swayed her hips. She was big, overwhelming for your mouth, but you still held on and were as skilled as you could be as a total inexperienced in the matter.

“That's it…what a nice kitty…” Marilyn murmured, moving even faster as you struggled to please her. “I love you…”

Those words took you out of the situation a bit. She had told you that she loved you many times, but this didn't seem like the right time to say it. She surely she was having so much pleasure thanks to you that she even seemed to lose her sanity. You stuck out your tongue and moved it quickly, making her moans even louder. You noticed that her body tensed, that her cock trembled in your mouth.

She was close, you could feel it. Your human part considered it normal, something that had to happen and it didn't matter. Your feline part was horrified, terrified to see how something so precious for your needs was going to be wasted. You didn't just need the pure pleasure that sex gave, your instincts and your nature had another purpose.

“I'm close, honey… I, I'm going to cum in your pretty little mouth…” She said between gasps, moving in a disorderly way, almost as if she was fucking your mouth. You opened your eyes and pulled away immediately. You didn't need that, you needed something else, and you had waited long enough. “What the hell are you doing now?”

“Please... Meow...” You said getting up and sitting down at the desk.  “Please, take me.”

Marilyn sighed, clearly frustrated, but she didn't comment, she simply lifted your skirt, exposing your wet center and stroking it roughly with her serious gaze. She would surely be upset that you pulled away from her, but seeing how your arousal shimmered between your legs made her change her mind.

“Oh… My silly and needy kitty, you are so wet for mommy…” She whispered with a childish tone. “She can't wait any longer… she needs mommy to fill her up…”

You nodded as she inserted two fingers into your wet and slippery center. The sensation made you moan very loudly. Marilyn covered your mouth with her hand while her fingers explored your interior.

“Shut up, kitty, you wouldn't want to be found out, would you? Imagine that someone hears your kitten meows in heat and they find you like this, a mess desperate for mommy to give her what she needs... Poor silly kitten...”

You didn't answer, you just moaned and meowed, this time controlling the volume. You weren't even able to think about the consequences of being caught that way, you only thought about the feeling you had in your mouth, about how pleasant it would be to have all of her cock inside you, filling you up.

Soon her fingers came out of you and with her hands, she parted your legs. It would be an image worth seeing. You, some random Nevermore student, spread-eagled on your botany teacher's desk, desperate for her to fuck you.

“Are you ready, my kitty? Are you ready for mommy to give you what you want so badly?” She asked, aligning the tip with your slippery and soaked entrance. You wanted to answer like a normal person would, but your heart was beating so fast and your purrs and meows were so overwhelming that you could only nod. “I've asked you a question, (Y/N)…” She hissed in a darker tone.

“Yes…Yes… Please…” You managed to say.

Marilyn laughed and sighed as she slowly eased into you. She was not soft, nor delicate, but she was slow, painfully slow. You noticed how your body was slowly getting used to the intruder. You remembered what your friends said, that the first time was painful, that it was not pleasant. They were just dirty liars. You never felt something so pleasant, such a warm and pleasant feeling. Your walls stretched little by little, sending a lot of sensations to your whole body.

You smiled, you didn't quite know why, perhaps to finally see your wish fulfilled, to grant your most primal instincts what they so longed for.

“Oh, (Y/N), you're incredible, so wet, so tight... You hug me so well... You're a very good kitty for mommy...” Marilyn told you, while she moved slowly, introducing herself completely. “It hurts? I know I'm big, I don't want my little kitty to get hurt.”

You shook your head, slapping your hand against the table, wishing those slow movements would speed up, that you could feel completely hers.

“It's okay, it's okay, calm down…” She told you, amused, grabbing your ankles and raising them over her shoulders. “You are so impatient… You drive me crazy, (Y/N)…”

You smiled, enjoying that little by little, her rhythm was accelerating, while your body was allowing deeper and faster movements. You could feel her inside you, all of her, you were right where you wanted. You weren't capable of thinking clearly, of seeing the risks that something like this could cause and surely would cause. You were only concerned about satisfying your hunger, feeling each of her small movements.

“My sweet, silly girl…” Marilyn whispered, picking up the pace a bit when your body finally allowed it. “Your body was waiting for me, it adapts so well… Oh, my kitten, we are made for each other… You will have such beautiful kittens…”

You laughed at that statement, reaching out your arm to try to touch your lover. Everything she said sounded heavenly, almost divine. It was what your body wanted to hear, what your instincts wanted. You did not remember such a happy and embarrassing moment. If you happened to see yourself reflected in one of the crystals, you would look away. You were a mewling, drooling mess, completely at the redhead's mercy.

“Marilyn…” You sighed as she took a hand from your legs to take yours. “Please…”

She nodded, it seemed like she could read your mind. After letting your hand go, she jerked you toward her and her movements intensified, now fast, passionate. You moaned, not like a cat, but like the desperate girl you were at that moment.

“That's it, honey…” The redhead whispered, without stopping moving. “Be a good girl, a cute kitty for mommy… You take it so well… I would spend my life inside you, my love.”

You meowed at those words. Your body finally realized her strong thrusts and little by little that unpleasant and at the same time pleasant heat began to overwhelm you again. You were close to your first real orgasm, and you were excited, but desperate at the same time. You wanted to feel it all, you didn't want your own emotions to hide the sensations that Marilyn provoked inside of you. Your hips disobeyed your wishes and began to move restlessly, following the redhead’s rhythm.

“Oh my God,” you were able to say, before your entire body arched and your inner muscles hugged her cock tightly, as if they didn't want her to leave your body. Marilyn stopped for a moment, enjoying your crazy vision, your orgasmic sounds and the tremor of your body.

“Good kitty…” The redhead murmured, holding you so you would stay still. “You've done very well, even though you're a silly and desperate girl, mommy loves you, honey, mommy wants to see those beautiful eyes when you cum...” She said, smiling tenderly, something that didn't match her words at all.

“Please…. I…” You said panting, trying to catch your breath.

“Do you want mommy to fill you up honey? Do you want mommy to give you some precious kittens?” She asked while little by little, she moved again. You nodded, almost with tears in your eyes. Each of her movements were like electric currents running through your body.

“Yeah! Yes please!” You yelled. This time she did nothing to silence you, she simply smiled and closed her eyes, increasing her speed, moving abruptly. Surely you were not aware of what was about to happen, but it was what you wanted, nothing could change your mind, it was the bad thing about having an animal inside you.

“Very good, honey... Mommy is going to cum... She's going to fill you up, my love... I'm going to...” She gasped, grabbing your hips tightly as, with a heart-rending moan, she leaned into you, squeezing her eyes shut.

A sudden warmth appeared in your center. A hot liquid ran through you while you felt how her cock throbbed. At last the moment had arrived. You had no idea that it could be so pleasurable, so much so that you had another small orgasm while her cum filled you completely.

“Damn, (Y/N), you're perfect…” The redhead whispered, still inside of you. “I'm sorry I made fun of you… I didn't know what I was missing.”

You just stared at the ceiling, noticing how a trickle of liquid ran down your leg when she finally pulled away from you. The purring disappeared, the messy meows no longer fighting to get out of your mouth. You felt great relief, your whole body relaxed. You felt weakness, you had no strength. The tension you'd had that last week was finally released, and just the way you wanted it to.

“Sweetie…Honey…” Sweet whispers brought you out of your state of ecstasy. You sat up at the desk and blinked several times, in case your subconscious had played a trick on you and all this was a simple dream.

“Hey? What?” You said, pleased that no cat sounds came out of your mouth.

“My love, it's been wonderful, but we have to put all of this in order…” Marilyn told you, getting dressed again. You nodded, jumping off the desk, still feeling how her cum was inside you. You got dressed, you put on your uniform while you thought when would be the next time that would happen. “You stay there for a moment.”

“I love you,” you said happily, like in a hallucination. Marilyn smiled and sighed, wiping the sweat from her forehead.

“Me too my love. You're mommy's good kitty, don't forget it…” She told you in her ear, giving you a soft kiss on her lips. “We don't get to have dinner anymore, but what do you think if we both take a bath together in my room? I really want to love you again...”

[kiefbowl]

Everytime I say to myself "im bisexual" i get this sense of deep guilt, and i just feel like crying flor some reason.

I know im not straight and i know im not a lesbian so the only logical conclusion is that I'm bi but i just dont feel like I am? I also dont feel like I'm allowed to have these feelings of struggle because i see people online say women are prtending to be bi for queer points so i feel like I'm overreacting you know.

Everytime I think of myself being in a relationship with a woman i feel a deep sense of shame.

I feel guilty like im a monster you know. I grew up in a homophobic country and only moved out like 3 years ago so i think maybe thats why ? Idk im just lost. I see people online just like being super happy about being lgb and im like why am I struggling? Im not supposed to feel this way. I feel like a fraud.

I was outed, kind of, I mean I wanst even sure i was bi but she told everyone and like my friends started behaving differently towards me and idk I just well first of all why did she tell people?? I didnt even know if i was into women i just wanst sure i wanted to make sense of it first i felt exposed in a way(dont worry my uni was chill so no physical harm or anyhting like thta)

Like that was my thing!! It was my fukcing thing and you don't get to tell people about it . Why did she do that. I know its not a big deal but now like if you ask me if im out i would say no ? Like no one knows im bi here in this new country.

Im rambling.

I have never said the word "im bisexual" out loud like ever

I'm going to give you permission about something you haven't specifically asked for, but in my wisdom I'm going to grant you this permission:

You don't have to know.

It's okay! You've moved, you're young, you're getting away from homophobia and finding new kinds of homophobia...that's too much stress, just stop worrying about it. So you don't know today, who cares? You'll figure it out. Maybe tomorrow, maybe in 50 years.

If it's causing you this amount of stress, and if all the voices of all these people in your head causing you doubt, then you aren't allowing yourself to discover by simply living. You're becoming a police officer in you head, and you're navel gazing as a form of punishment, and let me tell you, even if you were straight as ruler that wouldn't help you find love and fulfillment.

You're sexual orientation is something natural within you. So whatever feels natural, that's the truth of the matter. If you are trying to attack this as a thinking problem that needs solving, you just won't get there. Go out and party, go out and enjoy people's company, go set life goals and focus on them...and one day when you're not thinking about it you will meet someone you can't deny is the most lovely, beautiful person in the whole world and all you want to do is kiss them. And then you'll know.

This is about no one else but you. This is your sexual orientation, this is your life, and you don't need a peanut gallery weighing in. Fire your shitty friends if you have to. If people ask, you can say "I'm figuring it out" or even flat out say "that's none of your f*cking business." Or, if you want to be funny, pretend you have a very selective hearing problem.

Prioritize the things that you know are fulfilling you right now, and all the stuff you don't know yet will come back around in due time. This is true of love as it's true of everything else we obsess about. You don't have to know everything about yourself to be a good person.

Good luck, sis. Have fun smooching cuties, studying seriously, and enjoying the sun.

[bluebloodhearts]

No attachments

tsu'tey x f!reader

im new at writing please be patient, also english is not my first language

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[You are a human scientist working for RDA (Resources Development Administration). You have an Avatar and frequently use it when you go out to study Pandora's floral nature and natives. You are fluent in the Na'vi language for obvious reasons. You are out exploring when you suddenly run into Tsu'tey.]

Tsu'tey stands from his kneel, having just hunted his dinner. You see the moment his eyes catch your lanky figure. His ears fold back and he bares his teeth threateningly.

"Demon!"

she was taken aback by the sudden action, she putted her hands up in front of her trying to show she wasn't harmful

Tsu'tey's ears do not budge and he steps towards her aggressively. He is carrying a large, bloody carcass slung over his shoulder. His teeth snap at the air as he growls.

"What are you doing here, demon?" He says, eyeing you."im just looking at the plants" you said with the most calm tone you could muster Tsu'tey raises a skeptical brow and glances around.

"Here? In this area? Why?"

He snarls and shifts the heavy carcass off his shoulder and on to the ground, drawing up his own height.Tsu'tey glares up at you, standing a full four inches taller than you. You note his powerful build, toned from a life of hunting in the great wilds. With a deep voice that is still surprisingly soft spoken, he asks, "Why did you come so close?" he said "i kinda got lost" she said feeling a little ashamed about it.

Tsu'tey's face softens a little and he gestures to the massive bulk sitting behind him. "Lost or hungry?" He asks, his eyes dropping to the large animal you can now see is a massive deer beast."both" she said lowering her head when she heard her own stomach growling. Tsu'tey grumbles to himself and bends over to cut large chunks out of the wild animal. He offers it to you, looking you up and down as he places the hunks of meat in your hands.

"Eat. We'll discuss this later."

He moves to sit back down and begins tearing chunks of meat off the carcass.Tsu'Tey sits and begins to eat large mouthfuls of meat. He rips the meat out with his teeth, occasionally looking up to find your stare. He snarls.

"What are you waiting for?"

After a few seconds, he realizes you are waiting for him to let you know you can eat. He grumbles.

"Go on."

"thank you" you whisper

Tsu'tey continues to eat. Once he finishes, he leans back and watches you eat. His head tilts slightly when he catches you gazing at him.

"You're welcome. Now, answer my question. Why are you here, so deep in Omatikaya territory?"

"i told you i got lost" she said cleaning her hands

Tsu'tey stands up and dusts off his clothes.

"Yes, but you have to realize that in Omatikaya territory, this close to the Tree of Souls, if you are lost, it's because you're here without permission."

This seems to worry Tsu'tey. He looks down at you, his brows furrowed.

"Did you come to spy on us?"

"no never! i don't want to do that im just curious you know"Tsu'tey's eyes narrow. He walks toward you and grabs you by the shoulders. With his immense strength, he lifts you to eye level. He stares into your eyes and asks again, more sternly, "Why were you here?"

"I just saw like a thing floating it was bright so i followed" she said referring to the tree of souls she just looked at him

Tsu'tey's face shows understanding. His ears fold forward slightly and he nods. He lets go of you and turns away. For a second, he is silent. You see a tinge of sadness in his face when he says, "I see. Well, I suppose it is natural to be curious."

He puts his hands on his hips.

"Let's go." He beckons for you to follow him and he begins walking away.

"wait" she said standing up as fast as she could

Tsu'tey stops walking and turns to face you, his brow furrowed, looking impatiently.

"Yes?" He asks, his voice slightly annoyed.

"you are going to fast" she said as she reached him, out of breath

Tsu'tey looks down at you in silent bewilderment. He shakes his head and looks away before asking.

"How are you out of breath?"

His tone is stern. He looks confused. He doesn't seem to understand the concept of lack of stamina in another being.

"im just not on the athletic side you know" she said looking at him while walking

Tsu'tey slows to a stop. His brow is furrowed. He leans down slightly so he can look you in the eyes, his face still showing some confusion.

"How are you...not athletic? Are your legs injured? What is it?"

"im just not keen on doing exercise, I do enough exercise so I can go out" she said stopping with him and answering his questions

Tsu'tey is taken aback and furrows his brow even more, a little amused.

"I am not sure I follow... You do not do physical activity on the regular?"

He looks around, as if he wants to understand.

"How do you hunt? Your body does not get tired after a run?" he asks.

"i do get tired after running sometime and also I don't hunt" she said looking at him like he just asked the most obvious question ever

Tsu'tey is confused. He tilts his head slightly. He cannot believe what he just heard.

"You do not hunt?" he asks, a hint of surprise in his voice. Tsu'tey looks amused.

"What do you do then?"

"well research and look at the animals from a far, you know things that don't involve running"

Tsu'tey is speechless. He has completely run out of questions. His face shows bewilderment as he looks at you.

"How do you survive?" he asks, almost speechless.

"Well they usually just give me the food and I just eat it" she answered with an obvious tone looking at him "you hunt all your food? and don't you save some so you can eat later and not hunt again?"

Tsu'tey seems to mull over your explanation. After a few seconds of processing, he nods. "That makes sense..."

He scratches his chin thinking. You can see the gears turning in his mind as he asks you another question.

"Who is they?"

"my coworkers" she simply answers

Tsu'tey looks even more confused.

"These coworkers ,do they feed you all of your meals?"

"yes, sometimes but other times I have to make my own food" she says remembering that few times "it depends"

he is really intrigued by this sky demon he just met, she isn't trying to fight with him. Maybe she isn't as bas as he thought.

But he couldn't get feelings or get attached to her.

[iam-siriuslysher-lokid]

My mother passed away 2 weeks ago 😢 and im out of words to type

But i know deep down I don't have any regrets, I don't have lost chances. Because we had precious memories together, we talked about our flaws and all that and especially, how we love one another.

People will expect us to cry and weep for days, but for me it was relief. That my mother won't suffer her pains anymore, the pains that made her to not sleep. Too much pain that she couldn't move her arms. Too much pain that even the doctors knew it was a ticking time bomb to not do the surgery. However, it was a brain surgery and my mother knew the risks.

She keeps joking about how she was afraid that she would lose her memory. That she taught us everything, every responsibility that she does around the house, say like a knowledge transfer. We studied and took her advices on how she likes to do things. And she was worried we weren't able to do it like the way she does. But we proved it to her that we can, and we did.

The surgery was already in the talks since last year of September (2024). And doctors knew how fatal it was to not do the surgery. It's like you are aware that the person is about to die, and you have to take the chances to save them. If not, it's like waiting, waiting for the fatality to happen.

This May of 2025, my mother complained more and more about her pain. And the doctors knew this was it. Her symptoms are getting worsened. So my mom, me and my brother planned to loan the amount we needed for the surgery. This was not a small amount, it is a million. My mother expressed how she was shameful that me and my brother had to pay for her surgery. We told her it is just money, we can work and earn it all back in a few years. There was no hesitation when she heard us say that. She gained more confidence to undergo the surgery as ever. She was happy. We were happy. And we were excited as the doctors are renowned in their field of neurosurgery not just in our country but in Asia, US and Canada.

During the day of the operation, I wasn't there with her. I think God pushed my mom to not let me stay with her. Right before she entered the operating room, my dad phoned me. But it was my mom who answered, saying she was afraid and nervous for the operation. And I told her and reassured her that she can overcome it and that God will guide us no matter what happens. And that she will be healed from all the pains she is suffering from. I then said, love you Mama and she said love you nak back. I didn't know those were going to be my last exchange with my mom.

If I was there, I could have stopped her and tell the doctors it was not the right time. But God, let me not to be with my mom that day, because He knew what I was capable of doing. I believe it was all God's will that he brought my Mama gently, without suffering anymore. And I know God would not give trials that He knows we cannot endure. But this one was too early of a trial for me. I haven't even reached my 30 and I am living on with the loss of my mother.

After the surgery that was supposed to take 2 hours began to be the longest waiting of my life, it has turned to 8 hours and more. Doctors called us via the telephone for updates and they told us to keep praying for my Mama and that they're doing the best that they can. However, my Mama was a rare phenomenon. Her veins, blood pathways, started rejecting EVERYTHING that the medical science has dozens of papers that says it should work. Doctors says as if there is a powerful presence controlling my Mama's veins, to create clots in her brain to stop the medicines to pass through. They also did bypass to the other veins to let the blood flow coming in to her brain. But that also formed a clot. Multiple blood clots, as if her brain didn't want the blood to flow anymore. I even read about the surgery months before it was to be done to my Mama. The risks were so low, the success rate was 95% globally. But I'm afraid my Mama was part of the 5% unsuccessful due to her genetic programming to reject the procedure and the medicines to keep the blood flowing to her brain.

Her heart and lungs continued to work after 1-2 days, but her brain scans are not showing positive outcome. But we told the doctors, to give her everything she needs. And to relieve her from all the pain. And they did.

On the 5th day, we knew it was coming to the inevitable. Her vitals are dropping despite the high grade critical care medicines that was provided to her. Doctors says it's already in the maximum limit of the medicine and to go over than that means more complications. They gave us an exemption that night, to stay with her in the ICU. 11pm, we started singing to her her fave songs, we laughed about the good moments and memories we had, we hugged and kissed her, I had her hand on mine and I keep massaging her legs as I did before when she was in pain. It was an experience I never knew I will go through. 8am, her heart stopped, her lungs only alive through the efforts of the ventilator. It was shattering. But somehow as if God is patting my back, hugging me slowly, whispering I'm here and your mother is safe with me.

It has now been 2 weeks, my work is pressuring me to go back. My debts, my number of bills, are screaming at my face. As if the world is telling me to rush my grieving and go back to being "normal" again. I will never stop grieving - it is a part of me now. But I will move forward with it. I will move forward with my Mama.

I will forever owe my life to my Mama.

I will forever love my Mama.

[lunarmoonheart]

hfff day one: make it sapphic

summary: basically a rewrite of the first bit of npmd. lautski with lauren!peter aka piper.

(ive never posted a fic before so if anything is weird thats why)

title: take a chance on me ship: lautski prompt: make it sapphic

Stephanie lauter did not like highschool in fact some days she felt like it was killing her. So when she walked into her first class and found out they had a pop quiz she was pissed. She didn't study of course because why the hell would she. Besides she was very invested in a twitter argument about that dog from the kennel that bit her dad. She was of course on the dog's side. Whatever she has to start this goddamn test.

“What the hell is this shit?” Stephanie mutters under her breath. She does not remember learning this. Though she does skip this class a lot so she probably missed it. While frantically trying to come up with some way to pass she remembers that weird nerd sits behind her.

“Hey nerd listen up.” she mutters as she turns to the nerd. God what was her name piper or something?

“Me?”

“Yes you. Piper right?”

“Uh yeah wh-”

“Hi Piper, we've been in class together for a little while now, right?”

“Since first grade.” oh fuck how the hell do i not remember this really cute nerd?

“Well I'm just realizing I haven't introduced myself. Im stephanie.”

“Lauter, the mayor's daughter, I know.” god why did everyone know her as the mayor's daughter couldn't she just be steph.

“Well my friends call me steph. We’re friends aren't we piper?” please for the love of god say yes you fucking nerd.

“I don't know, are we?”

“Well uh i wouldn't advertise it to the whole school or anything but uh there's an unspoken bond between us. We are nighthawks aren't we? And nighthawks don't leave anyone behind.”

“I got left behind this morning. The bus driver is a fucking asshole.” How is this nerd so funny but also such a geek?

“Well we succeed together and fail together. So to be honest I'm gonna fail this test piper… unless you help me cheat.”

“Cheat?!”

“Yeah just finish your exam pass it to me then i'll put my name on it. Then you can take the test again. Isn't that fun?”

“Well yeah. But won't we get in trouble?”

“Please piper. Help a girl out won't you?” ok she looks convinced. Wait shit is that grace chastity shit shit not her damn it shes gonna ruin this.

“Cheaters!” god fuckin dammit.

“Butt out chastity!”

“Grace, just be cool” Piper stuttered out. Why the hell is that cute?

“Never” god this girl is a bitch.

“Miss Mulberry, they're cheating!” im so fuckin dead.

Well great here I am waiting outside the principal's office with this damn nerd. God my dads gonna kill me or worse take my phone. 

“Look-”

“Oh god im so dead im so fucking dead.”

“Girl chill it's fine. This your first detention or something?”

“No, I'm worried about him. If he sees me talking to STEPHANIE LAUTER I'm dead.”

“Relax nerd, we'll be fine.”

“NO you'll be fine cause your stephanie lauter i won't be fine because im piper spankoffski.”

Spankoffski that's a weird last name. Wait oh my god.

“Are you the kid that got lured into the gym last year and-”

“Yeah that's me can we just not talk about that.” 

“But you're a literal legend!”

“Please stop, I hate talking about it.”

“Ok ok fine.”

Well detention sucked. And my dad stole my goddamn phone so now I have to actually study so I can get it back. What the hell am i supposed to do though study with stacy and brenda. No, they are almost doing as bad as me. Kyle and Jason are a definite no. Oh god I gotta call that nerd don't i.

“Come on nerd pick up” stephanie whispers outside pasqualli’s in the small phone booth. Why this thing is still around she has no idea but she's glad at this moment. As the phone keeps ringing steph thinks back to her conversation with piper. If one could call it that. But besides that she seemed nice and she's actually pretty cute. For a nerd cute for a nerd.

“Hello?” Steph perks up when she hears the confused hello of Piper spankoffski.

“Hey piper?”

“Yeah who is this?”

“Its steph from school.”

“Oh steph uh hi whats up?”

“I need your help. My dad stole my phone and I need to get my grades up to get it back so could you help me out?”

“I don't know i mean-” steph hears some weird noises through then a voice speaks up

“She's on her way!”

“Uh who the hell is this?”

“Ruth and Richie pipers only friends. she's on her way.”

“Ok uh tell her to be at pasqualli’s. Thats where im at.” steph hears some more weird noises and a muffled “pasqualli’s! Piper that's-” before the person presumably Ruth is cut off by piper.

“Sorry about them. I'll be there in 10.” Steph just smiles before hanging up and going inside. As promised ten minutes later piper spankoffski walks inside looking flushed and frustrated until she sees steph. She walks over and sit across from steph setting a heavy looking backpack next to her.

“So what did you want to go over? I brought some of my books because I wasn't sure what you wanted to do." That's actually pretty sweet of her.

“I need help with my math. I am failing that class. I mean my other grades aren't great but I'm really failing math.”

“Ok cool, we're in the same class so I should be able to help. I brought some flashcards you could take home with you if you don't want to that's fine, I know they dont work for everyone.” 

They work for about an hour before steph sighs tiredly causing piper to look up from the paper. They look at each other for a moment before piper looks back at the paper. Ok steph can work with this. Steph put her hand on Piper's arm.

“So Piper, I think I'm done studying for tonight. Wanna get out of here?”

“Where would we go? It's getting kinda late. I'm not sure anything is still open.”

“We could go to my place. My dads at some dumb charity ball all night so we could do whatever." Piper blushes at this and again for some reason Steph thinks it's cute.

“Uh ok sure.” perfect.

“Alright let's go nerd.” Steph grabs Piper's hand and drags her out of pasquallis. She already paid for their drinks so she drags Piper out to her car and drives to her house. When they arrive she leads Piper to the living room and turns on some random trashy Christmas movie. They sit in silence before Piper speaks up.

“Why'd you invite me to your house steph?”

“What do you mean why?”

“I mean i'm a nerd and your the stephanie lauter. The most popular girl in hatchetfield high. You're not supposed to want to hang out with people like me.”

“Eh, I can hang out with whoever I want. I dont give a shit what anyone may say about me hanging out with you. You're smart, funny, nice, and you're kinda cute” they both stay silent not sure what to say next. Piper yawns and accidentally leans her head on stephs shoulder. Steph blushes and turns to look at piper.

“You tired pie?” Steph isn't exactly sure where that nickname came from but she doesn't really care. Piper blushes and looks up at steph.

“A little. Do you mind if i?”

“Not at all. Hey, I kinda enjoyed tonight. I know we were studying but your good company. So I was wondering if you maybe wanted to go out again? I was thinking maybe dinner at Miss retros or something.”

“Do you mean like a date?”

“I guess so yeah. So what do you say?”

“Sounds nice.”

@femslashfortnight

[literatureloverx]

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY TO YOU😝😝🤗🫶🏼🫶🏼 OMG I MISS YOU SO SO MUCH MY PRINCESS🥺🥺🥺🥺 It's been a while since I talked to you.. I feel like an absent parent😭😭 I have been doing a lot of things since I'll be graduating soon😣😣 Just one more week...Unfortunately😮‍💨 The plants in our garden is growing up so fast🥹🥹 I'm so proud of them. Other than that I've been doing quite fine, how about you my dearest? I hope you have been eating and drinking well, and also getting enough vitamins!

I started reading Blue Lock if you didn't notice from the amount of things I've reposted. I really really love it! Blue Lock is such a breath of fresh air from most manga or piece of media who tries to teach "All for one, one for all" or the "power of friendship" which don't get me wrong is a nice thing and I am a sucker for that trope or philosophy but it can be a bit overrated and for someone who is such a people pleaser (me) can get a bit toxic in my opinion. (I honestly do not know how to word this properly😭 Something about people taking advantage of people pleaser and them thinking it's alright cause "All for one one for all" right?? Iykyk) Im not much into sports (I literally feel my bones cracking when I do an exercise but maybe that's just a me problem) but this made me very interested in soccer! Although soccer is majorly male field I do want to see women that aren't just supporting characters.(Praying every day for an all female team to beat their asses😍) The characters are very interesting, my favorite part is how they interact off and on the field and also their back story!(I like studying them) My favorite characters so far are Isagi Yoichi🌱 (The mc and absolutely my favorite boy), Shidou Ryusei😈 (I find him very funny), and Michael Kaiser🌹(Very interesting man, I can relate some things to him). <<That was so random of me, sorry for yapping😣🙏

I watched the newly released melanie martinez song called "Leeches" and later that night I received a nightmare about a toddler size caterpillar(the very hairy one) outside my room😧😧 I'm not typically scared of bugs more or less just disgusted with them.. I wonder if you like bugs or not, snow? Oh and also what do you think of her songs?? And favorite??👀👀

Ngl every time I make an ask to you I feel so self conscious on how much I yap to you... Your just so welcoming mother!🥹🥹 I hope you enjoy April fools day🫶🏼🫶🏼🤗🤗 from your beloved vamp

—🧛🏻‍♀️🫀

Would you look at that? My baby vampire is here. ♥️ (Happy belated April Fools, by the way. I feel really bad about missing Nikolai’s birthday.😭)

I am happy to hear that you are graduating soon!

I am glad you have been doing well—I am also doing well, my dear. I have been quite busy lately, but it is fine right now; I have everything in order. I suppose I am eating enough too, no worries.♥️

There is no need to apologise. Your interest in Blue Lock is admirable, though I will likely never watch or read it myself because it reminds me of a certain puppy.

I personally like her songs, but not every single one of them. I have a few that I appreciate, and I once talked about them, but I can’t remember when. Dollhouse, Pacify Her, and Mad Hatter are songs that I like, for example.

I dislike bugs, but not overtly. I don’t like them near me (or on top of me), but I can take care of the situation if one happens to end up at home or something. I spotted a Mrs Spider (I called it that—I don’t know if it was female, but it seems plausible? No men are supposed to be in my room, after all. Haha.) in my room. I freed it, obviously (I cast it off the balcony 😭).

I am quite the dreamer myself, so it is relatable to me. Your dreams are almost as wild as mine, haha.♥️