#don't even get me started on my to read list

[10yrratiolover]

My health is on the decline so have some more Ratio headcanons to make me feel better

He makes a detailed list when grocery shopping and he sticks to it pretty strictly, only deviating from it on very rare occasions

I kind of hate the headcanon that he has a boatload of ducks, mostly because it reminds me of the phenomenon that fandoms will dumb characters down to liking one thing bc it was mentioned/shown once

^ that being said, I do think he would have a couple, most were given to him as gag gifts but

Freakishly fast walker, he's got places to be

A mild case of RBF, he furrows his brows a lot and it makes him look like he's scowling

I don't think he needs glasses to see normally, but I think he'd wear reading glasses like the ones in his BP icon since he reads so often and doesn't want it straining his eyes

I think he'd go out of his way to avoid scheduling classes, lectures, tutoring, etc really early in the day. He needs a few hours minimum to enjoy some peace and quiet at the beginning and end of the day.

Based on his character introduction, I think he does suffer from some kind of chronic insomnia, he mostly struggles with getting to sleep since he finds it hard to turn his mind off

Night time is also when his stress levels increase, mostly since when he's lying down with so much less stimulus/things to think of he starts to wonder if he accomplished enough/anything that day or if it was wasted

I've seen people talk about him not caring about his own gender, and I 100% agree with that

He presents masc but he really doesn't care, he also doesn't think about it much because he's got other more important stuff to do

I think he'd be a gamer god at Minesweeper, definitely not projecting

He actually genuinely enjoys socializing, even with idiots at times, in cases where he has to stay home because he's sick or whatever he's genuinely miserable about it

Sort of based on my post about his eyes but I think he'd have pretty good vision in the dark, like not 100% clear vision but better than an average person

^ Doesn't turn on the lights of his house if it's nighttime and he's not doing anything important, if he needs a midnight glass of water he's just walking around in the pitch black

[queenshelby]

Daughter Dearest (Part Ten)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy (47) x Step! Daughter (21)

Warning: Infidelity, Smut, Dysfunctional Family

Tag List will be updated soon! Please comment and engage!

"You need to get out of my room," you told him in a packed state and Cillian nodded before he quickly untangled himself from you and started to get dressed hastily. His face was flushed with a mix of shame and worry as he tried to pull his clothes on as quickly as possible.

"Quick, put something on!" Cillian whispered frantically as you, throwing your shirt at you that was lying around on the floor.  

You moved quickly, pulling the shirt over your head as you slipped out of bed and hurriedly pulled on your underwear and pants up too. 

Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest, and you swallowed hard, feeling a wave of anxiety wash over you as you heard your mother's voice.

"Cillian?" she called out , her voice was calm, but something in her tone sent a chill down your spine.

"Fuck," Cillian hissed, his face panicked, knowing that she might see him coming out of your room.

"Can you come down and help me with the bags?" she then called out, from the bottom of the staircase, which led directly to the bedrooms.

Cillian's entire body stiffened. He didn't know what to say or do, but the urgency in your eyes prompted him to make a move.

"I'll be right there, Marion!" Cillian shouted back, trying to keep his voice steady and calm before he nervously exited your room and, as soon as he stepped out of the door, he saw your mother, having walked half-way up the stairs already. 

Her gaze was laser-focused on Cillian, a hint of suspicion in her eyes. "What were you doing in Y/N's room?" she asked, but not suspecting anything inappropriate, even despite Cillian's disheveled appearance/ 

Cillian swallowed hard, trying to think up a plausible excuse on the spot. "Oh, I was just... checking on Y/N," he said, forcing a smile. "She seemed a bit down earlier, so I wanted to make sure she was okay."

Marion raised an eyebrow, not entirely convinced by his explanation.

"Well, I am about to have a word with her," your mother responded almost angrily but Cillian blocked her way up. 

"Let's get your bags in first," he suggested as he tried to divert your mother's attention for as long as he could.  "Despite, I think she needs a little alone time this morning as she had a fight with one of her friends,"  he added, searching for any excuse that could buy him a few minutes.

Your mother looked unconvinced but eventually relented. "Fine," she then said just before Cillian followed her to the car.

"Why are you even home already? And where is Sadie?" Cillian queried Marion  as he was loading bags into the house, still rattled by the encounter with you.

"Sadie is with Cliona, who is taking her to the park so that I can sort out the bloody drama Y/N has caused again,"  your mother said with a frustrated sigh.

Cillian froze, feeling a sinking feeling in his stomach at the mention of your name and the implied drama. "What do you mean by 'the bloody drama Y/N has caused again'?" Cillian asked cautiously.

"Oh god Cillian, did you not read the headlines?" she  asked, her voice laced with disdain. "The fact that she broke her house arrest and had you pick her up from the police station is all over social media," she went on before pulling out her phone and showing it to him.

"Well, thank god I don't do Facebook," Cillian chuckled, brushing off  the news to lighten the mood. 

Marion sighed, shaking her head in disbelief. "Cillian, this is serious.  Y/N is constantly causing trouble, and I can't believe that you didn't even call me when this happened. I mean, why didn't you?" she  asked, looking at Cillian with confusion. "I would have expected you to tell me if my daughter got arrested."

Cillian sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "I didn't want to worry you while you were enjoying some time away," he said, honestly. "Besides, Y/N asked me not to tell you. She was afraid of your reaction. Clearly rightfully so."

Marion scoffed. "Afraid of my reaction? She should be more afraid of the consequences of her actions," your mother spat, causing Cillian to become a little more protective.

"She didn't smuggle the drugs, Marion. She found out who framed her and went after her," Cillian began to explain. "And yes, it was a hotheaded decision that got her into trouble again, but her solicitor is sorting it now, so you can relax, alright? Just give her a break,"  Cillian insisted before taking the last bag from your mother's car.

Your mother, Marion, simply sighed in frustration. "Hot-headed is an understatement, Cillian. You know as well as I do that her reckless actions might not only ruin her own reputation but also affect yours and your career," she pointed out, but Cillian only shrugged it off.

"My reputation is fine Marion," he replied, unbothered. "Besides, Y/N's actions speak to her character, and I'd rather have a stepdaughter with courage and a backbone than one who's silent and obedient."

"You are too lenient," she said before calling out for you.

"Y/N, can you join us in the kitchen, please?" she called out.

All characters are over 18.

You sighed, knowing that you were in for another lecture about your choices and how they affected your family's reputation. You walked into the large, open-concept kitchen, where your mother sat at the kitchen island, looking expectedly while Cillian was standing by the sink, trying to avoid your gaze. 

"We really need to discuss your careless actions, Y/N. They are unacceptable and affect us all," your mother began with a pointed look in your direction as you stepped in front of her, wondering whether she could smell her husband's scent on you. 

"And what makes you think you have the right to lecture me about the decisions I make?" you shot back, looking at her, wanting to tell her what you just did, but of course, you wouldn't have. Revenge was not what your interactions with Cillian were about. 

"I have every right to lecture you," Marion countered coolly, still not missing a beat. "I am your mother and you are staying in my home, so you listen to me," she  asserted, reflecting an air of authority.

Cillian stepped closer, moving to stand protectively by your side, his presence a small sense of comfort in this awkward situation.

"Marion, let's just take a step back and take a deep breath," Cillian advised, his tone gentle, but firm. "Being angry won't solve anything."

Your mother huffed in response, before she closed her eyes and inhaled a deep breath. "Are you taking sides now?" she then asked him accusingly, turning her steely gaze towards Cillian.

"I am just trying to be reasonable," he replied, maintaining his neutral stance. "Because I think that you should actually hear Y/N out," he went on, looking at you, then on to your mother, expecting her to listen to you.

You looked surprised at Cillian's support, but it brought a small sense of relief which, unfortunately, for you, was short lived.

"What is this on your neck?"  your mother asked abruptly in a stern, disciplinary tone, piercing the tense silence in the room.

Her sudden query was followed by her hand extending forward, hovering over the side of your neck where Cillian must have left a red mark during your heated sessions. 

"It's nothing," you muttered quickly, flinching at her sudden touch.

"Alright, well, anyway...," she continued, lowering her hand back to her side, although her eyes remained fixed on the spot. "I am not going to tolerate another breach of your house arrest, and I expect you to behave yourself during your time here," she said with a sternness that was even rare for her.

"Yes, mother," you sighed deeply with a slight roll of your eyes, trying to downplay the situation.

"Don't be smart and go and have a shower. You look like a mess,"  your mother said, glancing over you one more time before turning to leave the room.

You couldn't help but feel a sense of relief wash over you once your mother had left the room, her judgemental gaze no longer lingering on you.

"I need to get out of here," you muttered under your breath, shifting nervously on your feet while Cillian came closer.

"And hopefully you can soon, even though I will miss your company," he said quietly  , placing a hand on your shoulder. The warmth of his touch burned through the fabric of your shirt and sent a shiver down your spine.

"I will miss you, too," you confessed as you finally looked at him, meeting his eyes. There was a distance between them both, yet a connection electrified the air, like a magnetic force drawing them together. "Last night was nice and so was this morning," you whispered  to him, almost inaudibly.

"It was," Cillian agreed, his voice low and soft. "More than nice, in fact. But what happened between us cannot happen again and, as we had agreed, let's not mention it again," Cillian murmured. Despite his composure, his eyes showed vulnerability and depth-filled with desire. 

You felt a pang of regret, knowing that your-selfish desires had led you to an unexpected path. The connection between you two was an unstoppable, powerful force but you knew that acting on it could only end in tragedy, not just for you and Cillian, but also for your family. 

"Agreed," you thus said before asking him for one more favor. "But I just have to ask you for one more thing," you hesitated before catching a lock of loose hair that had fallen across your shoulder and twirling it between your fingers nervously.

"What is it?" Cillian asked, his eyes on you, waiting patiently for your answer.

"I...I need you to go to the pharmacy for me,"  you requested Cillian, hesitation in your voice.

Cillian raised his eyebrows but quickly schooled his features. "Are you feeling okay? I mean, after, you know...," he asked, a hint of concern etched on his forehead.

You hesitated for a fraction of a moment, gathering your thoughts. "I'm fine, it's just... I need the morning after pill," you finally managed to squeak out.

Speaking the words aloud made you cringe but you knew this was the responsible thing to do and, of course, Cillian agreed.

"Of course, I'll go," he replied casually, as if you had asked him to get ice cream instead.

"Thank you," you murmured gratefully, releasing your breath in a soft exhale as Cillian stepped closer to you, brushing a gentle strand of loose hair off your shoulder.

"Do you need anything else while I am there?"  Cillian asked, his voice gentle and caring but you shook your head.

"No, that is all," you replied quickly, forcing a smile.

Cillian placed a hand on your lower back, his fingers gently brushing against your skin, leaving a tingling sensation in its wake. The gesture was so small yet so intimate that it made you feel both exhilarated and conflicted.

"Okay then, I'll be back in a few," Cillian said softly, his eyes never leaving yours as he slowly stepped away from you.

The way he looked at you, filled you with such a deep longing, it was almost overwhelming.

"See you soon," you whispered, watching him walk towards the door where he paused and looked back at you, one last time before he left.

Tags:

@sunbeamseas @saint-ackerman @oatmealisweird @naxxsstuff @amanda08319 @r-m-cidnah @elysiannook @cillshot @infireddabdab @tastycakee @harrysbestiee @lilybabe22 @adalynlowell @henrywintersdearestgirl @ietss @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @ryiamarie @axionn

@nela-cutie @futurecorps3 @delishen @nosebleeds-247 @thirteenis-myluckynumber @gills-lounge @hjmalmed @lost-fantasy @tiredkitten @sidechrisporn @smallsoulunknown @charqing-qing @hopefulinlove @aporiasposts @shycrybaby @me-and-your-husband @hjmalmed @lacontroller1991 @galxydefender @aporiasposts

@galxydefender @hunnibearrr @saint-ackerman @lunyyx @gentlemonsterjennie1 @ihavealotoffandomssorry @nadloves @lost-fantasy @nolucesn@mcavoy-girl @hjmalmed @bloodybagels @obeyme4life @richiesgroupie @blushykiss @tatumrileyslover @teawithsatanx @orijanko @rhaenyra4ever @xcinnamonmalfoyx @budugu @nadloves @kmc1989 @bloodybagels @obeyme4life @richiesgroupie @forgottenpeakywriter @smailaway @sophiaaguirred @blondie-22

[chevvy-yates]

Sending out kudos to everyone who has shown their love towards Ryder for the past two years.

I love u all very much and every engagement, be it even just a like, means a lot to me.

I've intended to sorta make a cool post of some older vp of him as of today, September 17th, exactly 2 years ago I have created Ryder,— back then as a supposed supportive character for Vijay, very unsure if I would like him as Ry didn't visually turn out as I wanted him to be in the first place and he never went that way either afterwards — yet I find myself writing those lines instead.

I've accepted his look and his imperfection started to grow on me with each picture I took of him. Unlike my other ocs he went his own way leading me along to discover his personality. That's what makes him so different compared to my other blorbos and has me so attached to him.

I did not plan to make him a raver (he was supposed to become an 80s goth punk, a total different style than he's got now) neither that he would end up with a rogue AI controlling him. Only his name, basic info and the toxic family story was planned right from the beginning but that's pretty much it – Ryder showed me the rest of it.

Within the year 2023 I noticed more and more that Ryder has slowly but surly turned out to be my main character.

He turned out to be the most expressive and photogenic one of them all. I don't see him as the prettiest looking either yet he's my most precious and I love every pixel about him.

He's the one thing in my life I am actually truly 100% proud of.

Almost all my ocs exist because of him. They are his support characters. Without him half of them would not even exist. There would be no Thyjs. Even Garnet exists so Ry can live out his passion (that was not really put into the game but exists as lore: Technoise).

I am beyond happy to have created him.

He helps me in a lot of rather personal ways too I do not need to address here.

I got so much to tell about him (also about my other ocs) yet idk if I should continue or not as I find myself stuck with overthinking about it bc of lack of public response literally everywhere (this excludes private chat talks with close friends). Maybe Ryder's too intimidating (not the first time I would read that), his lore gets overlooked easily, or it's to much (confusing) text.

I cannot make anyone force-like him. Tastes are different. Minority is into others oc lore. Less time to read it all. The list is long. I'm aware of it all.

But I cannot underline it enough: do never hesitate to ask me questions about him. He's on my mind 24/7 and my biggest wish is to get this story out and done some day (whenever it will be) and receive some actual feedback on it what was liked.

Just a tiny detail is enough. <3

Another wish I have ever since I joined the CP77 fandom: that people would go back to comment each other more. We all do have little time for it, we all think "oh no so much text to read", we all are in our own bubbles rarley coming out to explore another bubble within this universe. It takes a lot of effort to do. people do seem scared on top to write anything at all for numerous reasons. I have all those problems as well. But I try to sit down and read the one or other lore chunk others wrote down and give a tiny comment as best as I can to make the creator have a smile on their lips. I truly wish we all would do this at least once a week to one person. once a month would be also fine. But if we don't this fandom will be dead soon enough and all thats left is just liking vp with characters on it we know almost nothing about. And maybe even those characters won't have lore anymore bc people stop creating it.

[bucktommyfanfic]

A list of BuckTommy fics posted on April 7, 2024

These fics are carefully read through to ensure that they are BuckTommy positive. Any listed works do not feature character/ship bashing (apart from the Buckley parents or Gerrard, who do not count). These fics may feature other mature or triggering content, so please read author tags and warnings carefully and don't forget to leave some love!

Fic Recs - Navigation Page – Send a Message

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Absolutely, I’m Fine by luredin Oneshot | General | 1980

“Is that Tommy downstairs?” Hen asks with a curious head tilt.

He doesn’t exactly know what he’s bracing for when he hears the measured, heavy boot steps on the stairs but a bolt of nervousness flashes through his body so quickly it feels a lot like being struck by lightning.

He would know.

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Accidental reveal by SummertimeMadness Oneshot | Teen | 1011

After a month of dating, Buck accidentally reveals his relationship with Tommy to the team, all because of a stupid t-shirt.

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Another love by hxlpertss Oneshot | General | 1069

"So, why did you call me?" Hen asks, taking a big sip of her coffee. It was still pretty early and their shift will start in a few hours.

Buck pauses for a moment and thinks about his next words: "Is there..." he begins and immediately restructures his thoughts, "Do you think you can be straight your whole life only to realize at some point that you're not?"

-- Or: Buck comes out to Hen

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Bothered, Bewildered, Bisexual by @jcforsapphics Oneshot | General | 1078

Buck just had a life changing kiss- with a man.

Now he's just thinking about everything that means.

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Click of The Final Puzzle Piece by EmiLouGal Oneshot | General | 2522

‘So that was okay?’

His voice had been so soft, so caring. It wasn’t something he was used to. Once upon a time, Buck had been a womaniser, the one to flirt with women on calls. But yet…the kiss had felt exactly like when Taylor had kissed him for the first time. She had been his first serious relationship since Ali, since Abby. Then Taylor had betrayed, in what could’ve been the worst way a reporter could betray her boyfriend. That story still stung.

‘It was better than fake static noise…’

And he’d meant every word

Or...

Buck keeps replaying the events that transpired in his head like a broken record.

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didn't know that much at all 'bout love before by TheFacelessWanderer Oneshot | General | 1028

Even after awkward dinner first date can be magical.

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falling feels like flying by deflated_leaf Oneshot | Teen | 2679

I don’t think I can do this without you, Buck’s thinking. He doesn’t know why he doesn’t just say that out loud. I think I really like him, Eds, tell me what to do.

Buck talks to Eddie and also doesn't. Buck, apparently, is a mankisser and goes on his first date with a man. Buck talks to Hen.

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(fragile) handle with care by @rogerzsteven Oneshot | General | 3118

Slowly, Buck pulls the door open, and a restrained smile curves up his lips as he greets the other man, his heart racing at the thought of what to come.

“Evan.” Tommy says softly, with worry, and places his fingers under Buck’s chin to tilt it up, taking another step and leaning closer. “My God.”

Tommy’s hand slides down to rest on his neck, a featherlight sensation, and traces the tip of his fingers over the ugly bruises on Buck’s throat, touching every inch of dark patch of skin so gently as he examines, like he’s scared to hurt him. * Buck gets hurt on a call, Tommy looks after him.

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Hands-On Learning by wilddragonflying Oneshot | Explicit | 3004

Buck's education continues.

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Happy Accident by Not_as_straight_as_i_appear Oneshot | Not Rated | 597

Just some silly 118 family feels with a dash of Bucktommy

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The heart never lies by @flowersonmymind1016 Multichapter | Explicit | 4746

Omega Buck works up the courage to ask his Alpha boyfriend an important question.

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I am having a crisis here, Strand. by Hale_1517 Oneshot | Teen | 970

Buck isn't spiraling...okay maybe he is. In Buck's post first kiss with a man freakout he facetimes one of the only people that he feels might understand.

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Let's Fast Forward To 300 Takeout Coffees Later by BagelswCreamCheeseWrites Oneshot | General | 2728

Buck meets Tommy in other circumstances. He's oblivious to his feelings, until he isn't.

OR

I wanted a Coffee Shop AU so I made my own

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Low Tides by inkandella Oneshot | General | 2128

He can't bring himself to move, yet he’s still antsy—antsy to sprint out the door and run after Tommy as fast as he can, to call him even though he hasn't been gone five minutes just so he can hear that ridiculous low voice again, to turn back a clock and kiss him just one more time before he walks out of Buck’s home.

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Overwhelming, Overflowing by wilddragonflying Oneshot | Explicit | 7238

Tommy and Evan have plans, and even living in the most contrary city on Earth won't stop them.

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Right In Front of Me by @princessfbi Oneshot | General | 2845

Tommy’s brows knitted together as his mouth turned down with worry.

“Evan,” he said and Buck wanted to hear him call his name so many more times. “What happened? Did someone choke you?”

“That’s what I was trying to tell you,” Buck said, clearing his throat again when his voice gave an embarrassing squeak.

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Saturday Aftermath by queermatcha Oneshot | Teen | 2180

His date with Tommy doesn't go as Buck had hoped and when they are back at his loft, his insecurities make him freak out. Fortunately, Tommy is having none of it.

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Seen and Heard by @harvestleaves Multichapter | Teen | 3794

Tommy likes to think of himself as very observant. So when Buck has an asthma attack while staying over, he takes care of him. Not knowing that was something Buck has desperately needed.

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Step 2: Warm, Wet Mouths by TrustDivineChaos Oneshot | Explicit | 1566

After sharing a home cooked meal, Buck and Tommy learn that Tommy is very bad at video games, but very, very good at other things.

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Sudden Surprises of the most Unexpected Kind by NinjaTrashPanda Oneshot | Teen | 4590

Tommy's voice, accompanied by a wide smirk, was laced with amusement. There was a certain challenge in his voice that Buck knew he couldn't win. Tommy knew very much just how Buck felt about him. Neither of them had said it yet, because, frankly, three months in was just way too soon, but Buck felt it. He always fell in love fast and hard, and it always, always seemed to come in and bite him in the ass when he least expected or needed it.

The thing though? Buck wasn't scared. He should be. This exact same thing had happened with Abby, and Ali, and Taylor, and Natalia, and it had ended in disaster with all four of them. And now it was happening again with Tommy, but somehow, it wasn't suffocating, or anxiety-inducing, or, frankly, terrifying.

Buck was falling in love with Tommy, and it only made him feel warm, and safe, and happy. * Three months into his and Tommy's relationship, Buck, amidst rapidly falling for the other man, feels a bit off. At first dismissive of his symptoms, the two quickly realize that this is far more life changing than they anticipated.

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Sunshine came softly through my a-window today by voices_in_my_head Oneshot | General | 1653

"“So you’ve met a lot of cats named Slippers, have you?”

“A few. More dogs, really.”

Tommy finally breaks, letting out a laugh. He shakes his head, uncrosses his arms to put his hands on his waist. “You’re unbelievable, you know?” he sounds fond, looks fond and Buck thinks I never want him to stop."

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That's what friends are for by @aesthetictarlos Oneshot | General | 2508

Buck needs to talk to someone because a tangle of emotions settled at the pit of his stomach as soon as Tommy turned his world upside down with a tender kiss and he could use some help to unfurl it. He’s dialing TK’s number before he can second-guess himself, without even considering the chance that he’s on shift, or on a date with Carlos, or whatever. He would rather do this over a cup of tea, but having a long-distance friendship means that sometimes you have to settle for a phone conversation. - Or, the one where Buck calls TK right after Tommy kisses him, and then calls him again after his first date with Tommy.

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To whatever's coming our way by @tabbytabbytabby Oneshot | Teen | 575

When Buck and Tommy's first date doesn't go as Buck hoped, Buck worries he might have ruined everything. Tommy's there to assure him otherwise.

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Tommy, Bothered and Bewildered by @some-little-infamy Oneshot | Teen | 1033

Tommy didn't know so much could change from a front door to a kitchen island.

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wild again, beguiled again by @mairaiscarrierofthepaperclips Oneshot | General | 1083

The kiss had taken him out at the knees, a rush of lips and heat and just the barest hint of teeth, the graze of stubble not his own thrilling him in a way like nothing had before. Which was ridiculous, because the kiss hadn’t even been that long. He’d had longer kisses, hotter kisses. Kisses where Buck had very nearly forgotten his own name by the time they’d ended. And yet, this one kiss still had him smiling like a fool.

... or, the one after the kiss.

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You Don't Know Me (or Do I Not Know Me?) by Indy_mama91 Multichapter | General | 7689

It was a wonderful Saturday afternoon. Buck had picked out his outfit, then changed his mind three more times before he decided on his blue polo and black slacks for his date with Tommy.

It still didn’t feel real, he was going on a date with a man. He enjoyed a kiss with a man. If he was honest with himself, he couldn’t stop thinking about enjoying another kiss with a man, and another, and another after that.

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You Take My Hand and Drag Me Head First, Fearless by StarrySummers04 Oneshot | Teen | 1588

Buck panics before his first date with Tommy so he calls Maddie but doesn't want to tell her everything, he then goes on his first date with a guy.

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you twist to fit the mold i'm in by heroic_pants Oneshot | Teen | 1375

on a rainy sunday morning, buck muses on the new feeling of being held and waking up safe in someone's arms.

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you've got me surrounded by @half-bakedboy Oneshot | General | 1163

Buck never understood why he had lost so many sweatshirts and button-downs to past girlfriends. Nine times out of ten, they didn't even remotely fit their figure and they were only worn in the comfort of Buck's home anyways.

Then he puts on Tommy's pullover, and everything makes a little more sense.

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& found by malignantheart Oneshot | General | 481

After the disaster that was their first date—through no fault of their own, really—Buck’s convinced Tommy won’t be interested in a follow-up. It stings, but it makes sense, really.

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[sapphosremains]

Thoughts on Calvinism?

This is so interesting bc the majority of posts about Calvinism on here have focused on its beliefs about predestination, so I want to try and buck that. As with everything on this blog you'll get a weird mix of personal religion and academic theology, so do shout if you only wanted one or the other and I'll try again! Another disclaimer: I have no formal reading or research on Calvinism - denominational theology isn't really my area, so anything in here is personal opinion and from brief research, but no real academic reading. I'll get round to it, but it's not the top of my list right now!

Starting with the unified idea against the Real Presence, with Calvinism teaching that the Eucharist is simply a reminder of Christ's sacrifice, personally I just can't agree. I am still working out where I am on trans/consubstantiation, but I do completely believe in the idea of the Real Presence, and reject a memorialist theology. To me, it just doesn't work that the Eucharist can be a sacrament yet only a reminder and a memorial (although to be fair, Calvin's alternate view of what a sacrament is dodges this issue, but I can't agree with it so still personally doesn't work).

Now, from what I've read, Calvinism seems pretty on the side of sola scriptura, which again as an anglocatholic I am not. I think there's a reason why Revelation is addressed to the churches, and why Jesus devoted so much time to His disciples. Do I think that the Church is possibly more fallible than scripture? Yes, that's why I'm not RC, but I think the Church and community is of utmost importance, and understanding of Christianity and rule of faith is reliant on the Church. Furthermore, I think that again there's a reason why the Pope is the Pope and I'm not, and the Archbishop of Canterbury is and I'm not! Not that I would suggest that Calvinists reject this idea, just that I think there is a chain of authority and expertise in the Church for a reason, and their view ought to carry more weight than mine, despite us both reading the same scripture.

Carrying on with this Church idea, despite what I've just said, I'm not sure about the idea of God's only communication being through Christ. I'll come onto other reasons, but the first one that landed concretely with me was the idea that the preaching of ministers about God is the Word of God. Mmmm. Not sure. I think it's quite a vain idea to suggest that humans, ordained or not, let alone a massive group of them all preaching different things can all be speaking the word of God. Even just think of a minister you know who's said something slightly off, or a denomination that is far off every other, or not to generalise but if you've ever watched a mega-church service... can they all be the Word of God? Makes me feel a bit icky. The other stuff about Christ and salvation being the only two methods of God's self-revelation I feel like I don't know enough theology about to write about, but my instinct is against.

Covenant theology to me just felt like another framework, and I'm not keen on it. So far what I've read of Calvinism just seems to me like it tries to restrict a divine and infinite being into finite and defined ways of working with humans, and I'm not super keen.

Social trinitarianism? Nuh uh. I just, no. Not sure what to say, I'm just a Nicene creed girly.

Now, getting into the stuff we see more on here, starting with total depravity. This one makes me sad. There was a really good post on here which I've just been looking for (similar to this post by @hymnsofheresy) and I wish I could find it but essentially just a different view of original sin, seeing it more as meaning that we cannot be perfect, and to prevent us being perfectionists because we are in a world which cannot let us be perfect. I really like this view. The Calvinist idea of total depravity meaning that we are displeasing to God, 'defiled and polluted' in his sight, and makes us 'naturally hateful to God' is just like what? God loves us. Yes, He hates sin, and sin is irrevocably linked to the person, but I can't believe that He hates us and finds us displeasing, defiled, and polluted from the minute we are conceived.

Now, predestination. Similarly to the original sin, I just think this is such a nihilist theology. I think if I believed that there was a chance that before I had a chance to have faith, or do good works, I was condemned to hell, no matter what I did, I would struggle to have faith. Why would one want to believe in a God if you think that He could have condemned you to hell before your existence, based on no characteristic of your own?

On a more flippant note (ha), I couldn't be Calvinist because I love music, and as cool as a cappella is, it definitely couldn't be my whole liturgical life (also I'm an organist!).

Hope this was somewhat interesting, and I hope not horrifically uniformed. What are your thoughts?

[why-the-heck-not]

the saturday-sunday night diabolical "life is falling apart"- to do list followed by a mad scramble

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

I haven't read these books at all, but your art is so fun and cute that I like seeing your comics a lot regardless. Fantastic Silly Little Guy energy.

Thank you for enjoying my silly little guys and my comics B*)

[ihathbenobiwankenobied]

Cody holding Obi-Wan close through nightmares about Zigoola.

Cody's emotional damage finding out Obi-Wan returned from dead after Rako Hardeen.

Cody worrying about Obi-Wan and changing his bandages and after he returns from Kadavo.

Cody learning how to live and breathe again after tracking Obi-Wan to Tatooine.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

I want a ship war *people raising their pitchforks* to happen in the Roku fandom. *people lower the pitchforks, confused* That only yaoi fans can deliver.

I want 30 page analyses on which ship is better: Rozin (Sozin/Roku) or Yazin/Sosu(?) (Yasu/Sozin).

And then I need 30 more pages on why one char is the uke/bottom and the other is the seme/top.

Then I need the yuri fans to grab a sword and draw blood while they figure out the same for Zeisan and who she should be with: Dalisay vs Rioshon. Or if both Rioshon and Dalisay should cut their losses and kiss instead.

C'mon fandom I believe in you. Deliver on these ship wars 2000s internet era style. It's not delivery, it's toxicity~! uwu

[queer-reader-07]

i love seeing normal people recommend books/movies/shows because they're just like "i enjoyed this! i think you'd enjoy it."

meanwhile when i recommend books/movies/shows i'm like "here is a fragment of my soul. here is one of the many threads that weaves me together. here is something i will love with every fiber of my being until those fibers come undone at the end of my life. hope you like it too!"

[northern-passage]

Genuine thought as a fellow trans dude, I’ve seen a lot of (obviously non-serious) questions on other blogs about characters’ genitals such as “how does it look like?” and similar, and I think we all know & understand that such questions are extremely inappropriate to ask and (I hope) no one would actually go around asking these questions irl. Idk, I think we should treat trans characters just like cis ones, without any special “precautions”, so to normalise them and not make cis people treat them like fragile boxes, a thing which happens to a lot of us irl. Hope this doesn’t come off as an attack or anything lol.

no worries, i didn't take this as an attack at all. i actually agree with you, that's why i mentioned feeling conflicted about it and also mentioned that i've changed my stance on how i felt about handling Noel and Clementine in game and in explicit intimate scenes.

however, for me the problem comes from the fact that people... don't ask these kinds of questions about cis characters? i suppose people do get cheeky "who is the biggest 🤪" asks but i would hardly compare the two. to be a bit crude, no one is going to be asking if a cis character has a dick or not, or "what does it look like". of course it's natural for people to be curious, and i honestly encourage the open discussion and am happy to see trans bodies being talked about more in a positive way, but not everyone is going to be comfortable with it due to the inescapable transphobia online and in the community. sending me that kind of ask is like sending out an invitation for a debate or a discussion that i don't necessarily want to have. i also just don't think people should default to asking a random IF author on tumblr dot com to describe what bottom growth looks like.

and with most of these asks typically coming from someone who is anonymous, i have no way of truly knowing what the tone is, what their intentions are or why this is being asked - is it another trans person? or maybe someone who is just genuinely curious? or, more likely in my experience, is it someone who is going to immediately follow up this message with something transphobic after i answer? do i want to roll the dice and find out?

so while i agree with what you're saying, it's important to consider the context and the reality we live in. the IF community is not kind to trans people or trans characters. and as a trans person, my first priority is protecting myself and my mental health. so what i mean when i say "precautions," is that those precautions are for me, because i've had to deal with transphobic harassment here for years now, and i try to mitigate it as much as i can. it's also for my personal comfort - again, to be blunt, i'm simply just not comfortable discussing a trans character's genitals with anonymous strangers on the internet. it makes me feel vulnerable.

also i do want to say i didn't mean for any of that to come across as a dig at other authors - if you're comfortable answering those kinds of questions, that's really only something you can decide for yourself. like i said, this is just coming from my own experiences in IF and for my own personal comfort - i have previously talked a lot about trans stuff and gender and sexuality here, when i'm feeling up to it, but it is something that is very draining for me and can also be very upsetting.

basically: i do agree that it's important not to other trans characters or treat them any differently than cis characters, but i also think there are ways to do it that don't require me answering invasive questions or questions that i don't feel comfortable with as a real life trans person, you know what i mean?

[nostalgia-tblr]

in fic news i realised that i've accidentally commited myself to several scenes of jotunn!sylvie porn rather than just the one that i'd initially added mainly for the weirdness factor

[theramblingvoid]

Sometimes I think about how even when I'm trying not to be, I am entirely made of the people I love. I recently reconnected with a close friend I hadn't seen in about three years. Apparently they're into watching video essays now. I'm more of a gaming YouTube person, but to each their own, I've always known this friend to be a touch more academic than me anyway. Fair enough. We find other things to talk about.

It is two months later. My watch later list is entirely filled with video essays. Three years is not enough time to forget how to love somebody. I'm glad of that.

[paleode-ology]

spent the last solid couple of hours going through my old tumblr likes in order to have things better archived... unfortunately didn't make a note of how many I started at but it was probably in the mid 2000s and I've only cut it down to 2000 now. this is gonna take so long

[homosociallyyours]

(cw for gun violence & racism mentions in tag post)

[longagoitwastuesday]

I don't know how I got here, but I've stumbled upon the chapter "The thesis of Aramis" and after reading it I must admit that unfortunately I want him carnally.